The Ramsey Show - App - It's Not an Emergency if it Hasn't Happened Yet (Hour 1)

Episode Date: June 3, 2019

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. You jump in, we'll talk about your life and your money. It's a free call at 888-825-5225. You jump in and we'll talk. That's 888-825-5225. Diane starts off this hour in Seattle.

Hey, Diane, how are you? I'm good. So I have a pension where I'm working right now, and I can take it when I turn 65. I also have a 401k, and when I turn 65, I can take money from my 401k and increase the amount of years for my retirement, so it would increase my pension amount monthly. And so my question is, is that a good thing to do, or should I keep the money in the 401k? No, you should go the other way. If you can lump some out of the pension, you should.

Okay. Here's why. When you die, what happens to that pension? I don't know what happens to the pension. It goes to the other people inside the pension. Right. Okay. So all the money you move into the 401k you are giving to

someone else other than your family when you die okay that makes sense yeah so i would not do that and and the reverse is true if you can take the pension as a lump sum roll it to an ira in good growth stock mutual funds it will outperform the pension if you pick good mutual funds in terms of the rate of return that it will give you. You'll end up with more money alive, and you'll also end up with more money dead, obviously, because of what we just discussed. Right, yeah, and I don't know if I can do that. I'll have to validate that. Some let you and some don't. It depends on the pension and what it is and how much is in there and all that kind of stuff and whether you're vested.

There's all kinds of different rules with it. But basically the pension calculations are done at 5.5% or 6% interest, and good growth stock mutual funds should return you double that while you're alive. And so any money you took out of your 401K and put in there, you're trading 10% or 12% rate of return on it for 6% rate of return. And then when you die that your money's gone so there's two reasons to not go the direction you're talking about going and instead go the other direction jan's in houston texas hi jan welcome to the dave ramsey show

hi dave i have a real estate question for you uh we have a piece of property that has gone commercial the area it's located in has become commercial and it's worth probably easily $500,000. My accountant has approached me with a possible buyer and they're talking about splitting it up into three payments over two years, like a down payment and then a payment at the end of the first year and the end of the second year. And he says that will keep me out of a higher tax bracket. What do you think of that? How long have you owned the property?

It's been in my family since 1931. Okay. Your accountant approached you with this? Yes, it's somebody he knows that could potentially buy it, and he was also trying to, A, supposedly, and I trust my accountant, but he was keeping us out of the, like I said, the higher tax bracket and also any taxes that we're going to own it because it is not our homestead. Okay. So what was the property

worth when you inherited it uh roughly probably about 100 to 120 000 and that was 20 years ago all right well i'm having trouble with your accountant's math which always scares me with an accountant that can't do math all right this property qualifies for capital gains capital gains taxes there's two capital gains tax rates 15 unless you make four over 400 grand in a year and then it is 20 what's your household income about 88 000 a year okay so it's possible a portion of this would be taxed at 20%, but it would be a very small portion. And so there could be a 5% swing on it. So anything over $400,000 gain over what it was worth when you bought it. So let's do this, okay?

Let's say we sold it for $500,000, and we had $50,000 in expenses. That's $450,000. Your basis in it is $120,000. The that's 450 your basis in it is 120 the difference in that is your gain you follow me yes sir okay so we're talking about 450 i'm just making up numbers here but i'm just usually showing you an example so 450 uh minus 100 is 350 minus 20 more is uh what 330 330 000 is your gain that should be taxed at 15% unless your household income is over $400,000 that year. Now, it could be that you end up with over $400,000 with your income plus that gain. That portion would be taxed an additional 5%.

So you're taking the risk of carrying back paper on this property in return for about $5,000. Yes, and the other thing I don't even really know, because I haven't pursued it, is just the legal up and up. If we start splitting this into three payments, who owns it until it's completely paid, and who's liable or responsible for the taxes until it's paid? Does that make sense? Yeah, well, typically what you would do is you would be the owner financing on it. You would take a down payment.

The property's transferred to them. They're liable and own the property, and you have a mortgage against it. And if they don't pay, you have to foreclose on them. And that's the risk you're taking. So what's bothering me here is I can't figure out how your accountant came up with a calculation that's causing you to jump a tax bracket, and this client is also a client of his. Yes.

And so I'm starting to get that feeling on the back of my neck of a conflict of interest, like he's looking out for the other guy more than you. That's exactly how I felt, and I kind of wanted somebody else to tell me that. Yeah, I'm not sure. But I'm not positive. I'm not ready to accuse a guy yet, and I kind of wanted somebody else to tell me that. Yeah, I'm not sure. But I'm not positive. I'm not ready to accuse a guy yet, but I'm close. Exactly. So he gets one more opportunity to explain all this.

So let's walk through and pretend that you discover that there's something you and I don't see today, and it is worth the trouble for you to carry back paper on this. It's my least favorite thing to do, okay? And what you want to do in that case is do a happy happy mortgage a guy taught me years ago and a happy happy mortgage is you're happy if they pay but you got such a big freaking down payment that you're happy to take that property back if they don't pay i like it so in other words if they put down two hundred thousand dollars and you have to foreclose, it'll be worth the trouble. Because you get $200,000 in your pocket, and you get a half-million-dollar piece of property back after you go through the gyrations of a Texas foreclosure.

Okay? Okay. So that might be worth the trouble. It ain't worth it for $50,000. Yes, sir. So what was their down payment proposal? They did not propose it yet. Okay.

My proposal would be so large that they wish they had used a bank instead of you. Well, I was thinking a minimum of $200,000. There you go. Me and you are on the same team. So you're happy if they pay because you got your money, and you got a little interest on the money until they pay you the balance, right? Yes. And you got a big down payment.

And you're happy if they don't pay and you have to go through the problems of taking it back. That's a happy, happy. I don't think this is the case. I don't think this deal is going to go down. Because I think there's another issue here. And I think it comes into the relationship you have with your accountant. Because I don't see the math. I might be missing something.

Sometimes I do. But I'm generally pretty quick on the uptick on those things. So I might be there, but I've got enough questions. I'm not ready to endorse this deal, I can tell you that. Hey, thank you for calling in, and thanks for thinking on your own. Good for you. $500,000 assets, a lot of stuff to manage for God. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. options? Do you wish you could find an affordable biblical solution to your health care costs?

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chministries.org. We'll be right back. Our question of the day comes from Blinds.com. They have a 100% satisfaction guarantee. It means even if you mess up, if you mismeasure or you pick the wrong color, they're going to remake your window blind for free. With Blinds.com, you also get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you're going to save money. Check out the promo code Ramsey at Blinds.com, you also get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you're going to save money. Check out the promo code RAMSEY at Blinds.com. Blinds.com slash Ramsey.

Denise is in Illinois. My husband and I are on baby step two getting out of debt. We have two very old heating and AC units in our home. Should we start saving for those to be replaced since we know they are on their last legs? Well, typically, the typical family is out of debt, everything but their house and baby step two. The average is about 18 months. And you've been broke your whole life up to now with no money. And those heating and air units were sitting there all along.

And now that you're getting out of debt, now you're worried about saving money. Isn't that interesting? So now I'm going to get out of debt during the 18 months. And if they go out and you have an emergency that's in excess of $1,000, you're going to have to stop your debt snowball, and you're going to have to save up some money and get your heat and air fixed. And in the meantime, you might have some fans or some heaters. They got those at Walmart. It's what I've done.

Did it myself. Not too proud to say I did it. And, you know, I had a car growing up. Mama used to say we had a 240 air conditioner, two windows down, 40 miles an hour. So, you know, this is hillbilly stuff, but you can do it. It's all right. You'll make it. You know, I want you to get out of debt so you don't have to worry about stuff like that.

And then you replace them just because they need replacing before they break. When you're out of debt and you have a pile of money. But the way to get out of debt and have a pile, or the way to have a pile of money is get out of debt. So now I'm going to wait until they break or until I'm out of debt. And then I build my emergency fund. And once the emergency fund is built and they still haven't broken, then I'm going to save up and pay cash to have them replaced before they break.

Beyond baby step three. It's not an emergency if it hadn't happened. Did you hear that? That's pretty profound. You can almost tweet that. It's not an emergency because you're worrying about it. It's not an emergency if it hadn't happened. It might happen.

I might get laid off. You haven't been laid off. You might get laid off. I might have. I know. You might have a lot of stuff. There's a lot of mites out there, but it didn't happen. Dale Carnegie used to say,

80% of the things we worry about never occur. So spend all the money and time and effort and emotional energy you would spend worrying on being productive and it solves the problem jim's in marquette michigan hey jim welcome to the dave ramsey show thank you sir i have a question um i was actually thinking about retiring come the fall i'm working for the state. But I want to get out of debt. And I was either refinancing my home to pay off the revolving credit and get rid of some debt, or I have a 457 from work that I can pull out of.

How much debt do you have, not counting your home? Not counting my home is $26,250, but I also have a student loan of 60 000 okay so you have 86 000 in debt you need to clean up what is your household income today uh i've taken home 1700 bi-weekly about 48 000 a year give or take. Okay, $50,000. Yeah, about $50,000. Yeah, okay. And how old are you? 53.

How much is in the 457? Right now I've got $51,000 in my 457. Okay. And I plan to work when I retire from the state. Oh, okay. What would you be making when you retire? I'll be making $783 less a month. Less? Why?

Less. Why don't you get a better job when you retire? Well, no, no, no. That's just my pension. I'm not... That's my pension and then plus where I work. So you're going to go get a better job? I'm hoping to get a better job, yes.

You're only 53. Yes. And you don't have a lot of money and you're deeply in debt, so you need money. Right. Yes. Okay. So we take your pension and you get a better job and we pay off the debt doing that. No, I would not use your 457.

You don't have much money in there and I definitely wouldn't refinance my home and put it on the revolving debt i would cut up the credit cards and quit using them yes um and then i would get you know on a really tight budget and start working like a crazy man taking on um i'd start working on when do you think you're going to retire well i'm eligible to retire anytime i want i was thinking about retiring in the fall from this job and then going on and working at another job. Let's get the other job lined up that makes more money than you make now, plus you get your pension, which gets you out of debt faster, and let's retire as soon as you get the new job.

If you get it next week, go ahead and retire. If you get the new job in September, retire. If you get the new job in January, retire. But let's go ahead and get the new job in September, retire. If you get the new job in January, retire. But let's go ahead and get the other job. I don't want you wandering off and sitting on your butt on less money than you make now with this mess you have because you didn't have the other job lined up. That's what I would do. So, yeah, I think, you know, the answer to this is earn more and clear the debt with that. No, you can't borrow your way out of debt.

I never tell people to borrow on their home to pay off their debts unless it's to avoid a bankruptcy or a foreclosure. And you're certainly not in that situation. You've just got $86,000 worth of debt on a $50,000 income that needs to be cleaned up. And hopefully with the new job plus the pension, we're not dealing with a $50,000 income. We're dealing with an $50,000 income. We're dealing with an $80,000 income, and now we clean this up by living on nothing, beans and rice, rice and beans, cut up the credit cards, and attack these two debts and knock them out because they are prohibiting you from building wealth aggressively over the next 20 years, which will put you at 73 years old,

and I want you to be a millionaire with a paid-for house by then. And you can be, by the way, but you're going to have to take the very distinct steps to get there. And borrowing your way out of debt is not one of them. Kimberly's in Columbia, South Carolina. Hi, Kimberly. How are you? Hi, I'm doing great.

How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up in your world? Yes. My husband and I currently have one vehicle. We had two, but the one vehicle put us in debt 40,000. So we got rid of it, like you told us to, and that put us completely out of debt. However, now we are left with one car. He works full time. I work part time. We have four kids at home. I have been able to get a ride from my in-laws and go grocery shopping and such,

but it's been really, really tough. Sure. What's your household income? My husband makes $50,000. And with my part-time, I make about $2,000 a month during the summer. So $75,000 household income right now. And you have no debt except your home? Absolutely. Okay. So I think the big deal is go ahead and save up a couple thousand bucks and get a hoopty at least. Okay.

That's a question I had. My husband's completely against financing a car, which I totally understand. Now, I have found a used fixed van for $3,500. Now, we don't have anything in savings, so I would have to get a small loan out for it. No. Go ahead. No. We just got out of debt. No. We're not going back in savings, so I would have to get a small loan out for it. No. Go ahead. No. We just got out of debt.

No. We're not going back in debt. I want you to get a car as soon as you can. Absolutely. But we're not going to go in debt anymore. Here's the thing. Okay. Because out of all the millionaires I've studied, all of them tell me they quit borrowing money,

and that's how they become a millionaire. Okay. So I want you to stop borrowing money. Okay. For your sake. Okay? Absolutely. Because you can't go running to debt every time you have a need, and you have a very legitimate need.

Four kids, you're stuck at home with no wheels. Oh, my God. What a mess. It's crazy. Yeah. I'm going crazy just listening to this. I don't blame you. So it's a big priority.

Absolutely. And you guys need to lean on the budget. Let's have a garage sale. Let's a big priority. Absolutely. And you guys need to lean on the budget. Let's have a garage sale. Let's sell some stuff on Craigslist. Let's tear this budget. That's what I've been doing. Beans and rice, rice and beans. And let's get together $3,500 in the next two or three months.

Okay. And let's pay cash for something like that van you found. But I would never tell you to go back into debt or go into debt for a car ever. But, boy, you need one. I'm with you on that, kiddo. So let's get you a little hoopty of some kind. If you want to, jump in over there and get you a $1,000 car real fast and then move up to a $3,000 or $4,000 car in a few months.

I don't care. Whatever you want to do on that. I mean, you just need wheels is all you need right back. In the lobby of Ramsey Solutions, Paul and Ashley are with us. Hey, guys, how are you? Hey, Dave. Welcome, welcome. Where do you guys live? In Dallas, Texas.

All right. Fun. Well, welcome to Nashville. And all the way up here to do your debt-free scream. Yes. Cool. How much have you paid off? Paid off $132, Texas. All right. Fun. Well, welcome to Nashville. And all the way up here to do your debt-free scream. Yes. Cool. How much have you paid off? Paid off $132,000.

Way to go. And how long did this take you? Took us 40 months, Dave. Very cool. Good for you. And range of income during that time? Between $80,000 and $120,000. Okay, cool.

What kind of debt was the $ 132,000? It was mostly student loans, a little bit of car debt for my red Corvette, and a little bit of store credit cards as well. All right, very cool, very cool. So 40 months over three years you pushed through this. Good for you. That's perseverance right there, man. That's real. So what started this a little over three years ago, this journey to get out of debt? Well, back in college, actually, I took FBU workplace addition through who I was working for at the time. And back then, you know, I didn't have an accountability partner and I kind of fell away from the program a little bit. Found myself a few years later with, you know, a credit card, a loan on a Corvette

and, and found myself about a thousand dollars a month, a restaurant budget as a single guy. Oh, that's a habit right there. Right. So then we got married just about 40 months ago and kind of combined our debt picture. And then we said, just about 40 months ago and uh kind of combined our debt picture and then we said you know we've really got to do something about this okay so the marriage kicks this off you got it you sit down and go okay bachelor time's over restaurant budget corvette budget this is out of control and ashley looked at this and went not on my watch right yeah so talk about it actually who brought this to the table that we had to clean this up, him or you? Him, for sure.

Oh, he did. Okay. So he said, if I'm going to be married to Ashley, I'm going to have to grow up and clean this up. That's right, yeah. All right, good. Yeah, we got serious about budgeting when we got married, and then actually a friend of ours recommended asking us to coordinate financial peace in our church. Oh, good. And so we did that, and I kind of used that as a us to coordinate financial peace in our church. Oh, good.

And so we did that, and I kind of used that as a way to kind of get her on board. And one of the first things that went was the Corvette. You know, it was kind of a bait-and-switch situation. I had that when we were dating and engaged and even married, and then it was gone. But she's still here. Yeah, she's less concerned if you're cool when you're a dad. Right. That's right.

Love it. Well done, you guys. So you're coordinating a class together. You pushed all the way through this. When people find out you paid off $132,000 in debt, that's so impressive. I'm so proud of you. Well done.

Thank you. When they find that out and they say, how did you do that? What do you tell them the key to getting out of debt is? Go ahead. Definitely daily choices. Controlling your impulse buying was big for me, especially I'm a stay-at-home mom of two girls. And just making those daily choices of not going over budget on groceries or wanting to shop or do different things.

So the budget gave you a benchmark, and if you got up next to the edge, you said, that's it, we're done. Yes. So you had to have an out-of-bounds marker. But once you had that, you could spend up to that, but then, boom, we're going to go back to the goal. That's right, yes. Yeah, and also, I mean, I would say for me, having the cash envelopes was really important. That's one of the big reasons why I kind of didn't do so well in that time from when I took FPU to then later when we got married is because I fell away from using the cash envelopes. And really convincing ourselves, you know, although we're putting a ton of money towards this debt every month, you know, convincing ourselves that the cash and the envelopes is all we have and it really changes your behavior. Right. So we get to the, you know, for example, to the end of the month and, you know, we've got a few bucks left in the envelopes and we need, say, you know, paper towels or something like that.

You know, we might go scrape some change to get a ninety nine cent roll of paper towels to get us through instead of the normal amount we would get. Or really just being okay. Usually what happens is people go in to get the 99-cent paper towels, and they come out $100 later. That's right. Definitely. Yeah. And, I mean, really just being okay with passing up a good deal right now, knowing it's going to be there later when we have the cash and we're ready to do it. What was the hardest part of getting out of debt for y'all? I think just staying consistent,

continuing to be on the same page, and getting to talk about it and all this stuff. But we got there. At first, I was a little bit, I'm not sure about this. I hear you. What was the biggest budget fight you guys had during that 40 months? You know, we really didn't have too many of them. I remember we got married in October, and that Christmas we found ourselves at Walmart looking for Christmas decorations for our house, and I was having to say, you know,

I don't think we have the money for that. I don't think we could do that, and that wasn't a fun shopping experience. He was playing dad. I love it. Well done, you guys. Very well done. Do you have people cheering you on or saying you were crazy? Well, a little bit of both. We had real supportive family and community. And Ashley has some things to say about that. So, yes, definitely our families. I grew up, my parents were really good about money and they taught us about saving, spending, charity. So I did that growing up and so very similar to what you teach.

And then we had our friends and family also from our church. I would like to shout out to our home church of Good Shepherd and then our current church of St. Jude's and they've been very supportive of us. Very cool. Good. And you're coordinating a class there. Thanks for doing that. Financial Peace University appreciates it. I can tell you that. And the kiddos came along

during the 40 months, right? What are their names and ages? Let's get them in the picture. So Madeline is two and a half and Lydia is ten months. Oh, wow. A couple of little ones. Very cool. Good. Let's get them in the picture. So Madeline is two and a half and Lydia is ten months. Oh, wow. A couple of little ones. Very cool. Good. That's fun. Yes. Well, we've got a copy of Chris Hogan's Retire Inspired book for you.

That is the next chapter in your story to become millionaires and outrageously generous as you go along, okay? All right. Great. Congratulations. Paul and Ashley, Madeline and Lydia. $132,000 paid off in 40 months, making $80,000 to $120,000. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream.

Three, two, one. We're debt-free! Yay! I love it. Very, very well done. Well, that's how it works right there. Man, that is fabulous. You can do it.

You've just got to make the decision, and you have to plug into the ways of doing things. You have to submit yourself to a different way of operating. And when you do that, it changes everything for you. It's a big, big shift. Justin follows me on Twitter, at Dave Ramsey. About 800,000 of you do. If I have an emergency and baby step forward, do I stop the investing again to rebuild my emergency fund?

If you cannot rebuild it very, very quickly, yes. If it's a small amount or your income and everything is such that you can go ahead and rebuild it and keep doing your 15% of your income into retirement, then, you know, that's fine. You know, jumping in and out of a 401k is just kind of a lot of administrative nightmarish stuff. But, you know, let's say that you had a twenty thousand dollar emergency fund and you hit it for an emergency for three thousand dollars no i would not stop my 401k i would rebuild it uh let's say you had a twelve thousand dollar emergency fund and you hit it for ten thousand dollars probably stopping the 401k because you're down low enough that i'm scared now and i want that emergency fund

in place before you make big moves uh on out into things and for sure before you put extra money into your home or something like that and before you buy anything you would rebuild that emergency fund it becomes game you know it becomes a job one to not knock that emergency fund back out, to top it back out again as quickly as you can. So if you can do it reasonably quick without stopping baby step four, I'm fine with that when it's been dipped into because of that. But if it's a big hit on the thing, you need that emergency fund in place. I don't want you to get hit and then get hit again and not have any money

because you were putting money into the 401k. That's not a plan. So you see what I'm talking about. It's all about risk and ratios and that's what we're looking at here. So, hey, good question, Justin. Thank you for following us on Twitter. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. I'm Jay Shah. Melissa is with us in Oakland, California.

Hi, Melissa. How are you? Hi, I'm good. Thank you. How are you? Hi, I'm good. Thank you. How are you doing? Better than I deserve. How can I help? Okay, so we are in baby debts four, five, and six, and we're in a 15-year loan. Good.

We have no debt except for our house. Good. By the time my husband retires at age 50, our house will be paid off. Wow. And so he really wants to buy a truck and a trailer so we can take the kids traveling. And he wants to know, or we want to know, if we can save for that truck and trailer, it'll probably take us two years and hold off on baby step six for right now, pay cash for the truck and trailer, and then continue baby step six after that. How much will you be spending on the truck and trailer?

The truck is about between $42,000 and $45,000, and the trailer is about $15,000. Okay. So $60,000 for the rig, right? Mm-hmm. Okay. And what's your household income? So he makes about $150,000 a year with overtime, but his steady salary is $96,000 a year. Okay.

And do you work outside the home? Nope, I'm a stay-at-home mom. So that's your household income. And how old are the kids? Two, four, six, eight. Okay. All right. And what other cars do you own if you bought $60,000 worth of stuff here?

So we have a Honda Odyssey, this van, and then his car is an Acura, a 2008 Acura. Okay. All right. Well, there's a couple things I use as a rule of thumb. Try not to have more than half your annual income tied up in things with wheels and motors because things with wheels or motors go down in value. That's trailers, trucks, boats, sea-dos, motorcycles, whatever, right? And I love all those things.

I'm a boy. I like all that stuff. And I love the idea of taking the kids camping and stuff. And so how often would you use this truck and trailer if you had it? So he gets like two months of vacation. He just wants to take the kids for two months and drive all to these national parks. And then we would take it on the weekends for camping. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Okay. All right. Well, I would look and see if there's a cheaper way to accomplish the same goal, because you're putting an awful lot of money, given the money that you have, into that one thing that has a singular use. Now, you know, if you want to drive the truck um and sell his car as an example that would lower what you've got tied up in things um and uh maybe a cheaper truck

than 45 000 will pull a camper like it definitely will okay um especially no more than you're using it and so forth uh so yeah,000 truck will pull a camper. You don't have to have a $45,000 truck to do that. So I'm going to start to look in that direction. The other thing that pops into my head and I would want to weigh out is maybe the first year before you do that, you just rent an RV when you get ready to go somewhere. Yeah. It doesn't cost hardly anything compared to $60,000.

I mean, you can rent them for a night. Yeah, I've looked into that, too. Yeah, it's like around $700 for the weekend. Yeah. And that might not work real well for the two-month run, but $700 is a lot less than $60,000. Yes. And so you might scratch that itch a little bit, and let's see how things go.

You might learn some things about what you do like and don't like in the actual equipment by doing that. And then when you do make the purchase, I might crank your budget down a little bit. It sounds a little steep. Just given $150,000 income. You guys are doing well financially. You can do whatever you want to do. You're grown-ups.

You're asking my opinion, and that's, I wouldn't slam my fist down the table and say, don't do this. It's stupid. But it's getting up to the edge of it because of the dollar amounts and the usage of it and so forth. So, you know, you just got to think that through. I've got, you know, two Mastercraft ski boats. They're more expensive than what we're talking about here.

But my income is substantially different. And, of course, they're paid for. And they're a much smaller percentage of my world. And so since I don't use them but about three or four months a year, it doesn't destroy me emotionally for them to sit there in the garage the rest of the time, given what I paid for them, and given they go down in value every year while sitting in the garage. You know, and that's the same thing with this camper sitting in the backyard. You just got to think that through and go, you know, per hour that I sleep in this thing for 60 grand, you could have stayed in the Ritz, you know. So, you know, you just got to think that stuff through and go,

is there another way to scratch this itch? And maybe we put our toe in the water with some rentals, and we learned that a few times on a few weekends, and maybe we discover we're not going to use it as much as it is used in our head and those kinds of things. And that makes you stop and think about things like campers and boats and motorcycles and toys is what they are, toys with motors in them. And I'm not against them.

You just need to be real careful. Of course, like you said, pay cash. So good question. Thank you for calling in. Matthew is with us. Matthew's in Washington, D.C. Hi, Matthew. How are you? I'm good, Matthew. How are you?

I'm good, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? So it's kind of a complicated situation, but I'll try to keep it simple. I am having some issues with family members, mainly my mother, asking me for money over the past 30. I went back and actually looked the other day to tell her. Over the past 30 days, I have sent her over $900. And my monthly income is about $900 right now because I work part-time and I'm still in school.

She doesn't, the problem is she doesn't flat out ask me for money it's more or less she'll make we'll be talking about whatever because you know we have a really close relationship and i'm thankful for that but we'll be talking about you know whatever's going on in our day or what's stressing us out or you know just having conversation and she'll mention something like i'll say hey what are you doing for dinner? How old are you? An inch, 25. Do you live at home?

Yeah, it kind of got, this is what I was saying, it's a little complicated. I had a workers' comp entry that completely, like, threw everything off. I should have been moved out, like, two or three years ago. Okay. Are you healed? No, not 100% no. I actually have to work at a desk instead of doing what I did before. Okay. And you make $900 a month at 25 years old? Yes. It's just a part-time job until I can finish up my degree next year and find something

regular. You're studying. Okay. And what's your degree in? It's going to be in business administration with a minor in finance. Okay, very good. Okay, so the goal is to get out, have a career, make good money, and get out of the house. That's like the two-year goal. Not even the two-year goal. By the end of next summer, i plan on being done with school and

and you know land the big land the big job and get out okay i got you so in the meantime you've just got a boundary issue with her and um it sounds like the way you're describing it and if i'm if i read you wrong you can tell me but like that your close relationship with her is being taken advantage of? No, I don't think she's taking advantage of it. She knows that I'm a generous person, especially with family. You know, if they need help with something, and I can do it without putting myself in a situation where I'm going to struggle, then I'm going to help them. You know, I've always been that type of person.

So what's your question? How do I continue to be supportive and helpful in a financial way to my family until everything gets figured out? You can't. You make $900 a month. The weak can't lift the broken person. The strong can lift the broken person. And financially, you're weak. You make $900 a month. You're 25 years old. It's not your job to lift your mother. It's okay. You didn't do anything wrong. You're not being immoral. You're not being lacking

in generosity. Your mom needs to work on her life. The fact that she's going to her kids for money says she's got issues. But no, you're not responsible for her. You're 25 years old. If you want to be generous a little bit, fine. But it's out of control is what you're telling me. Hey, it's Blake Thompson, senior executive producer for the show. You know, you can listen or watch anywhere with the Dave Ramsey Show app on your smartphone.

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