The Ramsey Show - App - Look at the Future for Making Decisions, Not the Past (Hour 2)

Episode Date: February 24, 2020

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🎵 Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. Thank you for joining us, America. We're glad you're here. Open phones at 888-825-5225.

We appreciate you being here. This is God's and Grandma's ways of handling money. 888-825-5225. Juan is with us in Orlando. Hey, Juan. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, Dave. How you doing?

Better than I deserve. What's up? So I invested $80,000 in a stock, and now it's down to $10,000. Good Lord. Should I take it out? Yeah, I know. I'm in my own recession. Should I take it out and take it as a loss or keep the stock and hope for the best?

Well, I mean, we don't make the decision based on how bad a bloodbath we've already taken. We asked, what will the $10,000 do going forward? Do you think it's going to come back to $80? Do you have any reason to believe that? Yeah, I think it's going to go up because it went down to $0.60, and it went up to $1.30, but I got in at $3. So my question is, if you had $10,000 in your hand today, would you invest it into this stock thinking it was going to go up?

Honestly, if I would say no. Why? If I take it out, if I take out the money, I think I would just use it as a cushion. No, you're misunderstanding me. You're misunderstanding me. The way you make the decision is, what do you think the future is, not how bad the past hurts. The past hurts really don't make the decision.

I mean, if you think the future is, hey, I feel good about this. I think the thing's coming back to $80. I think it's going back to $3. And $3 down to $1 is not $80 down to $10. Wait a minute. That math doesn't work. I believe it's going to go up by the grace of God. I believe so.

Well, God's grace covers a lot of stuff. Usually stock price isn't on the list. So, I mean, that's just, you're praying that it's going to go up? Yeah, I don't blame you, man. You took a bath. Okay, so wait a minute. It would have had to go down 90%. You would have had to go from $3 to $0.30 for it to go from $80 to $10. It was like $3 and change, and then it went down to $0.60, and now it's at $0.93.

Oh, okay. So it should be one-third of what it was then. Yeah. So it shouldn't be $80 down to $10. It would be $80 down to about $25. Wow. What's your stock? Do you think it's worth $25?

I mean, at $0.93, what's it worth, $10,000? It's a little bit over 10 000 it's at like 11 000 okay then some of your other numbers are broken do you see what i'm doing yeah if three dollars turns into a dollar that's a 70 that's a 67 percent loss that is not a 90% loss. And so it would go from 80 to 25. It wouldn't go from 80 to 10. So something on your numbers is wrong. But you can go back and visit that.

The way you answer your question of whether to stay in it is, do you think the 10 is going to go back up quickly? Like, by Christmas, where do you think this is going to be? It's been a year and four months. By Christmas, where do you think this is going to be i'm really not sure i'm hoping for the best that's not a good answer okay hoping get you'll turn your 10 000 into 1 000 so you need to have a good case in your mind that says 10,000 is going to go to 30 or to whatever by Christmas. Or I just think this thing's a squirrel, and I don't know whether it's going to run up the tree or down the tree. And so in that case, you get out, and you take your lick, and you never do this crap again.

Never again. Yeah. crap again never again yeah and um the thing is that if i were to leave it i have um leverage in other areas like i have a company that i just started called blessed ourselves and i'm just um i have inventory and i created my own job i sell air fresheners so i have money that i can make money that can pay my bills. You can do that anyway. You don't need the money to pay your bills. But the question is, what's the best use of this $10,000? Is it going to come back up, or we don't know what it's going to do?

It's just a squirrel. And so if you think it's just a squirrel, then get out of the nut business, man. I mean, you're getting killed. But if you have some knowledge of this company that caused you to be in there in the first place that says that this thing should go up it's ridiculous that it's this low and you want to have a little patience with it i'm not gonna kill you for that i will kill you if you ever do this again oh bless your heart.

That hurts so bad. I'm sorry. Melissa's with us in Chicago. Hi, Melissa. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, Mr. Ramsey. How are you? Better than I deserve.

What's up? My question is, I have $70,000 in student loans, but my income is $47,000. What do you do? I'm a licensed practical nurse okay good practical nurse is that l lpn there is some states call it a lvn other states call it lpn okay all right i got you all right uh okay so you're working 40 hours. Yes. How many kids you got? Two. What age? 10 and 11. Are you single?

I am now. Okay, all right. Who watches them? I'm usually home by the time they get home. Okay, that's good news. Do you have family in the area? Yes, I do. Okay.

Well, here's the thing. I do quick math. I say, okay okay what's the size of my shuffle forty seven thousand dollars is my shuffle what's the size of my hole seventy thousand dollars is my hole you follow me yeah and so i start going okay if this lady lives on beans and rice and her kids do too and we put twenty seven thousand dollars to live on and twenty thousand dollars on the debt it takes four years that's a long time to eat nothing i mean really you're gonna have no life at that i'm not even sure you could do that in chicago on twenty seven thousand but i'm just pretending for a second so i'm kind of going okay but if she does ten thousand a year the seven years you see what i'm doing so what that starts telling me is you need to get your income up that's why i was asking

about your other stuff the great news is you're in a great field that you can always pick up extra work the bad news is that's going to be time away from the kids but if you but that's the only bit i have yeah oh my house i know but but you need to get rid of it. It's killing you. Yes. And so if you work some swing shifts or something on the weekends and, you know, work a couple 12s in the ER and have some extra work, and you pick up an extra $20,000, $25,000 a year and you threw it all at this, you'd be done with this in a couple years. But you're going to give up a couple weekends a month and mama's going to watch the babies on it.

Grandma's going to watch the babies or something. You know, that's what I'm saying. Something like that's happening here. And it's a temporary thing. And then you're done with this forever. But that student loan, it'll hang around like a disease. It won't go away until you kill it. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Are high health care costs getting you down?

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It's what Christian Healthcare Ministries has done for over 35 years. And our members have shared over $2.5 billion in medical bills. To learn more, visit chministries.org. That's chministries.org. That's chministries.org. Christian Healthcare Ministries is a proud sponsor of Dave Ramsey Live Events. chministries.org. Thank you for joining us, America. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. You jump in. We'll talk about your life and your money. Sandra is with us in Seattle, Washington.

Hi, Sandra. How are you? I'm so good. Thank you, Dave, for taking my call. A fellow volunteer fan to another. Thank you. Yes. Okay.

So I want to tell you my profile really quick, and then I'm going to ask my question. Is that okay? Sure. Okay. So my husband and I, we got married in 2012. We have no debt aside from houses. We have our emergency fund.

I'm a nurse practitioner. I've been off the last three years caring for our three-year-old daughter. And my husband's a medical sales, so he has a base salary, and he sporadically gets huge commissions. Okay, so instead of buying our first house and getting the biggest, baddest house we could get, we sacrifice and work so hard. And we have essentially bought four houses in the last like three or four years before the prices went super high here in Seattle.

So our rentals are all positive. They take care of themselves. They pay for property taxes, everything. Um, we are now, my husband calculated, we are now positive 700K on all the properties just, you know, since we bought them. My husband's 401K is at 320,000. Mine, because for a little while my job didn't have a 401K and then I had I rolled over everything to Roth and Iris and I have a hundred K in mind. Um, I'm starting to work again, like maybe grossing 4,000. I'm an independent contractor now grossing like 4,000 a month. Now that my daughter's a little older, we have another one on the way in November. I'm curious. My question is, um, this money that I'm curious. My question is, this money that I'm making and also my husband's commissions that come in from now on,

should we start really being aggressive and paying off these rentals, or should I do something with my retirement, or should we save for my daughter's college? We teach you at this stage of the game, you're at baby steps four, five, and six. Real estate is baby step six, paying off your house or houses, in this case rental houses. Baby step four is you should be putting 15% of your household income into retirement. Once you're doing that, then baby step five is you address your kid's college and you look at it and say, what do we need to be saving here so that we're being responsible you don't have to completely fund it but you got to get something started that makes sense once you're doing that then i would begin to pay off real

estate with any other money i can find in our household budget but it's not your money or his money it's our money in a pile accomplishing these three goals, 15% into retirement, kids' college, and everything else starts going on these mortgages. Now, you own a home now, right? Yes, we do. And what is your mortgage balance on your home? I wrote down $413,000. And what's the mortgage balance on the smallest rental balance? It's $170,000.

Okay. All right. So you can decide which of these you want to attack first. If they're close in balance, I always say pay off your home first and then pay off your rentals as a risk management tool. But that's pretty substantial. You may want to knock off that little rental and then you may want to knock off another one. Then you may want to swing over and knock off your house and knock off the other. But how much total mortgage debt do you have between all of it? I just calculated it.

It's about, it's a million on the rentals. Okay. So it's a million four. All right. And your household income is what? With you working and everything now. Yeah. So it would be like, I mean, I'm not counting the taxes i have to pay because that's

kind of i'm just now started so i don't know um so like for my husband it's 4400 on his base salary but then you know it's always more than that you know with commissions what do you think you'll make what do you think you two will make a year going forward starting now um Maybe six plus, maybe $10,000 a month. Okay, so $120,000 a year. Does that take home pay? No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Mine's probably like $3,000 a month, so maybe like $7,000 to $8,000 a month. Okay, so $100,000 a year. Okay. Yeah. And if you're making $100,000 a year and you have a million foreign mortgage debt, that's a little bothersome. Okay. Because it's going to take a long time to get that paid off.

I would be looking, I'd be picking out a couple of those rentals to sell and taking that equity and using it to clean up some of this mess. I don't want to make $100,000 a year and have a million foreign mortgage debt. That's scary. That leaves you into a mess. And I don't want that for you. Our question of the day comes from Blinds.com. They have a 100% satisfaction guarantee.

That means even if you mismeasure, you pick the wrong color, they'll remake your blinds for free. You get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you'll save even more. Use the promo code RAMSEY. Sarah is in Tennessee. My husband and I are drowning in our bills, and debt is piling up. We want and have tried to do the financial peace method, but our mortgage is way too much for us to keep up. We bought the house only a year ago.

It was definitely a mistake. We've been trying to sell it for almost six months. It won't sell. What do we do? Things keep getting worse and worse and worse, and I don't know how to make this stop. I'm sorry. I know you're scared.

Well, you know, the only shot you've got is to make a detailed budget and do everything you can to get your income up until the house gets sold. But you got to make every dollar behave. And sometimes when you get in a bunch of stress, a bunch of drama, you throw up your hands and you make it worse by being very impulsive and drama queen. I do that. And so, yeah, instead, what you have to do is you have to get very, very, very serious. Like this is life or death. We have to get very serious. We're not going out to eat. We're working extra. We're selling everything in sight. We have a written budget. Jump on every dollar. It's free to use. Use your every dollar budget. It'll change it, change the way you do it. And it, you know minutes, and you can stay up with where the money's going.

And that's the whole thing. So you jump in and jump on this. And if you'll fine-tune that budget, and you'll cut your lifestyle down to nothing, and you'll work extra, and you'll sell stuff, you'll be able to hold on until you get the house sold. And then when you get the house sold, this thing turns right side up, and you'll work extra and you'll sell stuff you'll be able to hold on to get the house sold then when you get the house sold this thing turns right side up and you'll be able to breathe again and that's what you got to do every dollar is changing the way people do budgets now six million people are using our budgeting app it is the world's best budgeting app and you can get it for your phone regardless of what kind of phone you've got it is free because we want everyone to be able to get control of your money but if you didn't know

there's a thing called every dollar plus that's 99 a year and what that allows you to do is connect to your bank and then every time you use your debit card boom it shows up and you can slide it and allocate it to a category drag and drop makes it real easy to keep your budget going. And so lots of people are loving this upgrade feature. Now, the reason we charge for it, it's real simple. The service that we use to connect to the banks charges us. And so that's what this is. Well, I don't know why, Ramsey.

Well, that's why. That's it. And it's worth every penny of it. So if you're an EveryDollar user and you're ready to upgrade, check out EveryDollar.com today at $99. And there's all kinds of goodies that come with that. So it's not just the bank connection, something you want to learn to do and be right on top of. It's a big deal. Folks, no one accidentally gets somewhere.

No one wins and says, how did that happen? I don't know. It was so random. They know exactly how it happened. They worked their tail end off. That's exactly how it happened. They were very intentional. You cannot wander along and then suddenly wake up successful at something it is a very detailed

focused intensity concentrating on what you're doing making every moment count towards your goal intentionality perseverance these are character qualities of people that win at life and their choices. You can choose to do it starting today. Ready, set, go. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you. In the lobby of Ramsey Solutions, Cindy is with us. Hi, Cindy. How are you? Hey, Dave.

I'm so excited to be here. Well, it's an honor to have you with us. Where do you live? I'm living in Birmingham, but I'm originally from Tennessee, so go Vols. There you go. Well, welcome to Nashville. And so several hours north here to Nashville and doing your debt-free scream. How much have you paid off? I paid off around $31,000.

Very good. And how long did that take? It took me right at 22 months. Good for you. And your range of income during that time? During that time, I was making 50 to 55. Okay, very good. And what do you do for a living? I'm actually a financial analyst. Oh, very cool. Very cool. How old are you? 28. All right. And so 22 months ago, $31,000. What kind of debt was the $31,000? It was just the typical student loans, my car, credit cards, and then, of course, my phone. What was most of it? My car. Your car. How much was it? Probably about $18,000. Over half of it. Okay, good. Cool. So what happened 22 months ago? You're

a couple years out of school at that point. Yep. My church had a financial conference and we went to the conference and I didn't really think I needed it. I thought I was pretty in control of everything. I've always been frugal, never really a frivolous spender. And I went to this conference and I was like, oh, I think I'm normal. And my eyes were open. Like I had no control of my finances. I didn't know where my money was going. Wow. So I'd look at my bank account and go, oh, I have $5 left. I guess I'm eating ramen tonight.

So I just had no plan. I wasn't preparing for my future or anything. And so I remember you actually, I heard you in college. You came and spoke at Tennessee. So I was vaguely familiar with the baby steps and I had a copy of the total money makeover at home so went home I read it started listening to the podcast and I was on board after that okay very cool I think I remember Chris Hodges church having a conference about that time was that your church that's my church yeah he's a great pastor he's a

good friend I think Rachel spoke at that if I remember I think she came down went down or maybe she did a service right after that yeah so we love those guys they're great it's a good friend. I think Rachel spoke at that, if I remember. I think she came down, went down, or maybe she did a service right after that. Yeah, so we love those guys. They're great. It's a great church. Yes, yes. Very cool. Well, congratulations. Thank you.

So now that you've done it, you did the Total Money Makeover, you got some information from your church at that conference, and 22 months later, you're free. Mm-hmm. What's the secret to getting out of debt? For me, it was just remembering your why, staying focused on that, and just keep, you know, you put a lot of discipline into this. It's a lot of hard work, and it just makes it so much harder when you don't know why. And for me...

What's your why? Well, my why was, you know, I really want to be a blessing to other people. About nine months into my journey, I went in for a routine eye exam and the optometrist found a mass on my eye. Whoa. So I went in to see specialists and testing and all of that. And I was diagnosed with a uveal melanoma, which is a rare form of cancer. So I remember last year, my mom and I flew up to Philadelphia for an appointment. There's a doctor up there that specializes in this rare cancer. And we went up for an appointment and, excuse me. So

we got there and the doctor said, you know, we need to have surgery now. And so there's a lot of stuff going through my head at that moment. But I'm just kind of thinking, how am I going to pay for all of this? How am I going to pay to stay in Philadelphia? You know, I had already booked a flight home. I got to book another flight. I have $1,000 in my savings account. What's going to happen?

And I just really felt defeated in that moment of, you know, I've worked so hard so long, and I'm just in this pile of medical debt now. And we went through with the surgery, and about day two of recovery, I opened up my Facebook account, and someone had started a GoFundMe for me. Whoa. I opened up my Facebook account and someone had started to go fund me for me. So my friend had recruited people to donate to help pay for the hospital and the medical expenses and all of that. And last year I was just like really holding on to Psalms 46, 5. It says, God is within her. She will not fall. And it's just having that faith and trusting and knowing that God's going to provide.

I went home after the recovery, after the surgery, and the next few months, you know, you keep getting these medical bills in the mail. And I feel like after every medical bill I got, there was a card or a note from, you know, friends, families, and sometimes even complete strangers. And they said, you know, we're thinking about you, we're praying about you, we're praying for you, and there's a check-in closed. So it was every step of the way, like taking this step of faith and trusting God that he's going to provide and just getting that far. So I'm never going to forget what those people did for me and how God used them in my time and my struggles

and how it has affected my life. And so, and that's my biggest why God wants us to bless others and to give to others, give like no one else. And we can't do that if we're not being better stewards of what he's given us this far. You can't do it when you're broke. Yeah. Right. So, so how are you doing now?

How's the health? You know, I'm, I'm cancer free. So I'm really free. Yay! I'm really, really happy. That's very cool. Yes. Very cool. So when did you get that final diagnosis?

A few months ago. You got cleared just a few months back. Wow. Good for you. Yes. Thank you. Very cool. Very cool. Man, you've been through it.

Yes, I have. But I am so excited. You know, last year was tough, but debt free, cancer free. I mean, it's uphill. Yeah, everything. Everything is easy down here. Downhill, whatever. It's whatever the hill is. But you did it. Wow. Yeah, it's you. Congratulations. So who were your biggest cheerleaders? So I went through Financial Peace University after that conference. And my leader at the time, Kenneth Leonard, since then, him and I have actually led three groups together. Oh, wow. Thank you.

Yeah. So he's always been a big advocate, a huge supporter, encouragement. And then I have to give a shout out to my work family. They've had my back every step of the way they tease me anytime i want to purchase something they go what would dave say about this or what would dave do so you became a filter in decision making i've been called worse well congratulations thank you very proud of you. Thank you. Well done. Very well done. What a great story.

I'm sorry you've been through all that, but I'm glad you're on this side of all of it. You know, it was tough, but it's awesome. You learn the lessons. God always provides. Amen. Yeah. Well, we've got a copy of Chris Hogan's book for you, Everyday Millionaires. You're going to be one, and that's the next chapter in your story, and that's going to

put you in a position that, you know, there will be all kinds of cards that you write with checks in them. Outrageous generosity for the rest of your life. Looking forward to that. You won't be able to stop yourself. I'm so proud of you. Thank you. Well done.

Cindy in Birmingham, Alabama, $31,000 paid off in 22 months. She's debt-free and cancer-free, making $30,000 to $55,000. Count it down. Let's hear's debt-free and cancer-free, making $30 to $55. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one. I'm debt-free! Love it! Love it, love it, love it.

Very well done Oh man, that is awesome That falls under the heading of Just in case you thought you had an uphill climb today Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and knock out the debt While I'm knocking out cancer Just a little thing And wear an eye patch part of the time

Oh my gosh, those of you on YouTube are watching the pictures come up of her in and around her time of her surgery. Hey, I know it's hard, but you're going to pay a price. You're either going to pay the price of living a mediocre life, or you're going to pay the price that it takes to be a champion and to win.

I would rather get it out of the way. You're going to pay a price. Choose intentionally which price you want to pay. Don't give up. Don't be a victim. Be a Viking. Be a victor. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. We'll see you next time. Anthony is in Youngstown, Ohio.

Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show, Anthony. Hi, Dave. Thanks for taking my call. Sure. What's up? Okay. So I started the Baby Steps a few months ago. I've read the Total Money Makeover, and I'm actually coming into one of my last debts, and I had a question.

So I just financed the mortgage. I did not put 20% down, so I'm paying the PMI. The last debt that I have is my wife's student loan, which is approximately $35,000. And I wanted to know if it was smarter to take that money and refinance the mortgage and get the PMI off or just go ahead and finish up Baby Step 2. The only way you get your loan to value down below where there's no PMIs to use the money you would have paid on the student loan? Do you currently have enough equity to do away with PMI? No, I don't.

I would be saving up instead of paying off. No, I'm just paying on student loan. Okay. Just to get the student loan gone. When you get up to Baby Steps 456 and you start beating on the house, you're going to get the loan to value down to where you can refine and get rid of the PMI that way. Oh, I see. And it's a Baby Step 6 thing.

It's part of paying off your house. In other words, it's not part of Baby Step 2 where you've got the other debts. Okay. All right. That makes sense. It's a good question, though, because that just shows you're thinking and you're being intentional. I'm trying to. You know, that's the trick is people just pay attention, right?

Yeah. And so, you know, you're really focused on what to do and you're thinking through it. So it's a valid question. But now we leave PMI and anything associated with a mortgage in Baby Step 6. Now, if you could refinance your home today because your loan to value is where it is and get rid of the PMI, that is not a Baby Step issue because that doesn't cost any money out of pocket. You could roll the refinance costs in. Let's say you owed 70% of value.

You could roll your refinance costs in and get rid of PMI. Or you probably could get an appraisal if you have a conventional mortgage and get the PMI dropped. Now, FHA, you got PMI forever. Same thing with a VA loan. So you might want to refinance in those cases but you just have to run the numbers out but you could refinance without any cash out of pocket and if you could do that then it's an end the question becomes independent of the baby steps but while it's

actually affecting you paying off the student loan we're choosing between pmi and student loan we'll choose student loan jordan is with us in Canada. Hi, Jordan. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi there. I just got a question about my business. Sure. Okay, so I'm a proprietor, electrical contractor, and I've got $20,000 credit card debt of, you know, buying material and everything,

and I'm just wondering if I incorporate my business and I carry that credit card to my business so it's not on my personal debt. Your bank in Canada might do that. In the U.S., they're not doing that. You're going to have a personal guarantee on that credit card in the U.S., and that means that legally there is no business debt. It's all personal debt. It's only in your mind that it's business debt because you use the debt for the business and so it just becomes part of your debt snowball which is what

i think it is i think even if you incorporate they're not going to let a business of your size carry a credit card without the guarantee of the owner meaning it becomes personal debt okay yeah that would be normal anyway there may be a a nuance in Canada that I'm not aware of. I'm not an expert on Canadian details, but conceptually, that's what it would be in the U.S., and I suspect that's what you're going to find there as well. Jennifer is with us in Springfield, Illinois. Hi, Jennifer. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show.

Hi. Thank you. Sure. What's up? Thank you, Michael. Okay, I have a question. My daughter started school last fall, community college, and she had to, yes, she had to take out a loan for a vehicle. Why? It's just a small loan, like $3,200. Oh, crap. Because, well, she didn't have any money, but since then,

she's gotten a better job, and they told her when she took the loan out at the bank that she could not pay it off early because she didn't have any credit. Sure she can. Yes, that's what I told her. There's no such thing as you can't pay a loan off because you don't have credit. That's a banker trying to bully a young person around and saying you shouldn't pay it off because if you pay the payments and give us all the interest, then you will build your credit. That's advice.

It's not a regulation. Okay. Okay, exactly. It's advice that was given so strongly your daughter thought it was a law. Yes. And she's young, so she didn't know. But my question is, how do we help her establish her credit? Why would she establish credit?

Well, I don't know, for a future. So that she could get into debt? Well, that's all we want. The only reason I know to establish credit is so that you can get into debt. It's a dog chasing its tail. I go into debt so that I can establish credit. Why? So that I can go into debt so that I can establish credit. Why? So that I can get into more debt and establish more credit. Why? So that I can build into debt. So that I can establish credit. Why? So that I can get into more debt and establish more credit.

Why? So that I can build tall buildings in the skyline that I don't get to own called banks. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. So I don't establish credit. My credit is zero. I don't have one. It's indeterminable.

They're not sure I'm alive. Oh, okay. They think I'm a Martian. But you know what? If you don't have any debt, you end up with money because you don't give it all to car payments and student loan payments and MasterCard. Who named that anyway? Cindy's with us in Houston, Texas. Hi, Cindy.

Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hi, Dave. Nice to speak to you. You too. I have a question. My 82-year-old father-in-law recently moved in with us, and me and my husband are not in agreement. I feel like he should be contributing to the household expenses. My husband doesn't think he should. So how did he move in without you two being in agreement first? Exactly. It kind of was thrown on as he was either going to come here or he was going to be in a nursing home. So it was like we had 24 hours to make a decision and not to put him

in a nursing home. We brought him home. So you guys did not have a unity prior to making a decision and not tip it in a nursing home, we brought them home. Yeah. So you guys did not have a unity prior to making a decision this large, which was a marital mistake on your all's part. So now you've got marital discord and an 88-year-old man in the crossfire. We sure do. Yeah. Yeah. So who was going to pay for the nursing home if he went? It was going to come out of his retirement and his money that he had.

Okay. So he should contribute out of his retirement and the money that he has to your household income. I agree. What is your household income today? It is $94,000. What's your net worth, you and your husband's? Well, we're not. I mean, we're $95,000 in debt.

Oh, my God, you're $95,000 in debt. What's your income? Yes, we're 94. Our income yearly is $94,000. Oh, you're 94 in debt and you have a 94 income? Yes. Oddly enough. Okay.

All right, that's confusing as crud. How old are you two? I am 50 and my husband's 49. And he has an 88-year-old father? Mm-hmm. Okay, so he was 40 when he had him. Okay. Yes, he was.

Okay. Does he have siblings, your husband? He does. But unfortunately, my husband is a sole care for her not oh i don't mind that and i think it's wonderful that you're taking care of his dad i think that's all fine the thing is that your his brothers and sisters are profiting off of you while you're broke because you're supporting the care of this gentleman living with you and he should pay you what he pays some portion

of what he would have paid the nursing home. That's fair. That reduces his estate, and thereby what brothers and sisters will get upon his passing. But that is what would happen had he been in a nursing home. As a matter of fact, it would have been reduced even more, and he would have had a different quality of life. He gets the wonderful thing of living with you guys.

Yes. So I think it is fair for him to contribute something, maybe not completely equal to what the nursing home would have cost, but free is not fair. It's not right. It's not right because when your father-in-law dies, your brothers and sisters-in-law are going to get more money that would have been in your pocket and your $94,000 in debt.

And that's not right because they're contributing nothing to his care. Zero. Zippo. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Correct. And so my brother and sister-in-law live next door to my father-in-law and do a wonderful job looking over him.

And I would do anything for them because they have all of that on them. And I'm in the other end of the state. Sharon and I think they're amazing, and they will never bear any cost in excess of what the rest of us chip in because we are thankful they're there to take care of him. And that ought to be the position of this family. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, it's Blake Thompson, Senior Executive Producer for the show.

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