The Ramsey Show - App - My Dad Wants Me To Get A Prenup! (Hour 3)

Episode Date: January 17, 2023

Dr. John Delony & George Kamel discuss: What to do when family members want you to get a prenup but you don't want to, How investing in Legos and other toys is a horrible way to build wealth, from the blog: Dave's Investing Philosophy How to navigate grief and what's next after the loss of a parent, Why the interest on debt doesn't matter in the Debt Snowball, from the blog: Debt Snowball vs. Debt Avalanche How to pick where to live when commuting to work from the website: Cost Of Living Calculator Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET Want a plan for your money? Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3nInETX Listen to all The Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3GxiXm6 Learn more about your ad choices. https://www.megaphone.fm/adchoices Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy

Девочка-пай What's up, America? We're live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the pods, moving in storage studio. It's the Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your money, your relationships, your marriage, your kids, and your life. I'm John Deloney, joined here by George Campbell, and we're taking your calls just about everything. The call is free, and the advice is worth about that much, but we'll give it our best

shot. 888-825-5225, 888-825-5225. Let's go to Marie in Fargo. What's up, Marie? How we doing? I'm doing good. How are you? Good.

Hey, talking directly into your phone. Yes. Can you hear me? It's a little bit wobbly there. Keep going. We'll see if we can get you. We'll give it a shot. Yes.

What's your question? Okay. So I'm in the fourth generation in our family business. My boyfriend and I have been together for four and a half years. My dad wants me to get a prenup. Neither my boyfriend and I want to, but my brother did recently get divorced, and he did have one. Okay.

So usually my thoughts on prenups, I'm not a fan of them. It's kind of like it's planning the end of something and you're going into it. When you've got something like a family business, here's what a prenup can protect you from. Less from your husband, your future husband, and more from your future husband's cousin's sister's brother's roommate. Or your husband, heaven forbid um gets sick and passes away or gets in a wreck and some sister or some cousin sues you guys for your does that make sense it just separates it all um that's where a prenup can be very very useful it's less about i don't trust him or i wouldn't be marrying him. It's more about if he, something happens to

him, which is why we have insurance. That's why we have wills because something will happen to all of us. But heaven forbid, something does happen to him. It protects your business. It protects your stake in the business. It protects the whole thing from anybody coming out of the woodwork to try to take a piece of it. Okay. So what's your net worth? I didn't even know that was possible. Yes, it is. It is something.

Me personally, not so much yet. I'm still young. Well, not that young, but the business does around $6 million a year. That's a lot of dollars. And so you would be inheriting the business or some portion of it? No, I wouldn't inherit. I need to buy myself in, but yes. And so what I would do is take a job.

I would start working there if that's what you wanted to do and take a... Oh, no, I have been for the last decade. Okay. Do you have enough money to buy in uh currently i have a sliver of the pie what does that mean this is on an extreme a tiny little bit of it so if i have a very small what's your buy-in gonna be i have i only have three% of the business currently. You only have 3% of the money it's going to take to buy the business, or you're slowly buying it piece by piece over time?

I own 3% of the business currently. Okay. And your boyfriend, what is his financial situation? Right now, he's laid off because he's a seasonal worker, but when he does work, he makes more than I do. Okay. I mean, we don't advise against prenups in situations where there is an inordinate amount of wealth that you're coming into with this very lucrative jewelry business. So it is something that you may want to look into, and it sounds like you guys are doing it, approaching with the right spirit like you guys are doing it,

approaching with the right spirit of you're going, hey, I'm not doing this because I'm nervous about marrying this guy. I'm doing it to protect us from crazy down the line. And that's the way you want to think about it. And neither of us want to get one, but my parents do. And I'm just concerned. Here's what but my parents do. And I'm just, here's what I recommend. He flat out said, like, I'm not getting one. And that's how I feel as well. But I just, I don't know what to do. I would sit down. This is going to be worth, um, 500 or a thousand bucks to do this. Um, because of what was at stake here. Um. I would sit down with an attorney in your local

community and tell them what your dad has told you. Tell them what y'all want to do. Tell them what I told you, that this is less about him and more worried about something down the road. An attorney may advise you, well, he won't be an owner. You will. And he would have part of your estate. So there may be all kinds of different ways involved here okay that may be able to avoid a prenup i think you have to get past the idea that a prenup is y'all planning for your divorce or you're planning for your husband to screw you over that's not what that's not we're talking about here okay um one red flag for me is your husband already planting his feet in the ground against your dad i'm not doing that i'm that attitude at the before you even walk down the aisle

makes me that's a red flag for me as someone who's just talked to a million different uh a million different couples sure that tells me he's more invested in his ego and his pride than in what's the best way i can honor my wife what's the best way i can keep her and this business safe and the best way we can be connected and unified as a family and i have to look in the mirror and say no i got some crazy cousins or i've got some crazy, you know what I mean? He's got to be able to do that and say, okay, this actually protects you

in the case I get hit by a bus. Okay. See what I'm saying? I never thought of it from that point of view. So, but it's a much, I get what your dad's trying to protect his business and he's trying to love his daughter the best he can. I don't fault him for a second. I also don't fault him for being overly cautious

and you having to say, Hey, that's too cautious. I don't call. I don't, I don't, um, uh, I don't have any heartburn about you and your husband saying, do we really are not interested in signing a prenup? We're going into this thing together. Um, I get that too. That's why I would get a third party who has no stake in any of the family stuff or the drama, and it's just going to give you wisdom, particular to the business, to your situation,

your state and local laws, all that kind of stuff. So that's where I would go. But think bigger. And again, I'm not for prenups. I don't like him at all. I don't like him at all. But there is a time and a place for him.

It's a good word. And with this situation, he is your boyfriend. And so unless we are really like we're about to get married, this is not a thing we have to deal with right now. I mean, we don't even know if he's going to propose what this looks like down the line. But it's good to at least get some information from the lawyer going, hey, what does this look like on paper in a worst case scenario? What would actually happen? And that will give you some peace and confidence moving forward with it or not moving forward

with it. That's right. Hey, here's a fact about Ramsey Solutions I'm super proud of. We've never laid off anyone. We've let people go, but we've never laid anybody off. For the past 30 years, we've been doing what we preach. We run a cash-based business, which means we budget for everything. That includes salaries and compensation for our team members. You deserve the right to work for someone you can trust, someone who won't cut you

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I'm George Campbell hosting with Dr. John Deloney this hour. And John, I got a video I'd like to play for you. You know like when the substitute teacher shows up and it's like, let's watch a video. I kind of feel like the cool teacher because of that. I feel like this has become one of your favorite things is to say, John, you live in a bubble and here's what's happening in the rest of the world. I need to look at a screen every 30 minutes or else I spin out of control. And so this is part of that.

So the team has teed up this video. I want to get your reaction. Okay. You ready? Let's do this. For Lego enthusiast Lucas Letrick, these aren't just toys. This is the Lego Creator Palace Cinema. They're serious moneymakers that he buys and sells for profit.

The biggest online database of collectible LEGO sets lists $1.2 billion worth of the toys around the world. You know, LEGO Tron up here, more in the $300 to $400 range. This LEGO TIE Fighter, $200 a piece is what these are selling. The returns that I typically will see is somewhere between 150% to 250% on a Lego set. Researchers say Letrick is one of tens of thousands who, concerned by the recent volatility of stocks and bonds,

are betting on the reliable returns from this tiny but growing market. Wow. Move over, crypto. Yeah, back that thing up, Beanie Babies. Wow. We have a new toy in town. Okay, so this brings me to an article, John.

Here's the headline for you. Adults are buying toys for themselves, and it's the biggest source of growth for the industry, and there's a new name for these people. They are called Kidults. They have a great fondness for cartoons, superheroes, Star Wars, Lego, and in recent years, toy makers like Mattel have created lines just for these consumers. Because they're ka-stupid. That's why. Well, think about it. They have the nostalgia, and they have the buying power.

They've got money now. Right. You know how many times I've tried to convince my wife that this new guitar or hunting deer rifle is an investment? Yeah. No, my truck is an investment. It's going to depreciate and then suddenly re-appreciate. Oh, yeah.

You know who can't afford this? Kids. And so, I mean, it's astronomically expensive these days, but there's some fascinating stuff in here in the article, and there's one that's connected to it that's interesting. Investing in Lego, more lucrative than gold, a study suggests. Okay, I hate these. Oh, gosh, you're giving me hemorrhoids.

That's apples to apples. I hate these snapshots. A brick of gold, a brick of Lego. The snapshots. The worst. The worst, the worst, the worst. So, I'm 100% for buying toys if you got it. Buy whatever, dude. If you got the money, have a great time.

Yeah, you've got your weird hobbies. I've got so many weird hobbies. And my son is down with the Legos. I love them. Dude, I could sit there and do Legos all day. It's quiet. We put on some music. It's awesome. I love Legos. I love them. I love them. To lie to yourself and others about them being an investment property. Dude. If it all goes down.

We'll be trading in Legos, right? And someone comes to my house. And they're like, hey, I've got a tin of coffee and some cigarettes. Can I have a Starfighter Lego set? It's not going to happen. It's not going to happen. It's trading more lucrative than gold because we have more money than cents.

And there's more circulating dollars, which means there's more things we can buy. And there's people right now on Etsy or eBay or whatever going, that guy's full of crap what an idiot whatever you're cool keep buying and selling toys knock your lights out rock on to the break it on dude you're gonna be sitting i dude i'm just sitting with people who've got a lot of guitars they got a lot of guns they've got a lot of whatever this is my investment bro we'll sell some they're getting way less than they thought on on average or it's it's all it's

just imaginary dude it's just like we all have those beanie babies in the attic where we were going oh i could have sold those at one point i'm gonna stop right there i don't have a beanie baby i know you have a huge collection i sold mine okay i don't know i don't know where they went john but yes we all have things they're like, no, it's worth this much, bro. But it's pretty, I mean, it's a fascinating stat if you just look at it. Oh, it is. It is. The article says, the market for secondhand Lego rises in value by 11% annually, which

is faster and better than the rate of return than gold stocks, bonds, stamps, and wine. In the last decade or two, when there's been the single highest wealth accumulation in the history of planet earth mostly we can get that's a whole other conversation so yes congratulations yeah i think it's guys i'd rather you uh invest in lego than stamps so you know there's some good things there but i will say the company lego they are genius marketers and here's how they did this, John. They use limited production runs. They use collector special editions.

Huge. And scarcity on the secondhand market. That is what has kept these prices up. It's simply supply and demand. And they are so good at creating the scarcity, the urgency. You'll never get this collector set again. Everything's a collector set now. It's like blood Legos, right?

That's how it goes. It's unbelievable blood Legos, right? That's how it goes. It's unbelievable. So a great lesson in marketing, terrible investment. I'd rather you be investing in your retirement. And if you want to just enjoy Legos and it's a collector thing for you, get a billion aside because you've already maxed out retirement. You don't have any debt. You're using your fun money. That's great. We are happy for you. We're not mad at those kid adults out there, but please do not delay your retirement because you're like, oh, but honey, if I get this Lego set, it's going to be worth way more than my retirement account.

Or here's me being just honest. Man, if you buy Legos and collect Legos and they go up in value and you're buying, great. I can't argue with the data. The last decade, man, these things have done great. Awesome. They're going up in value. You're an adult. You're a collector.

You're going to buy some expensive Lego sets that are rare. Awesome. What I don't like about these kind of studies that get dropped out with headlines like this is that people who watch too much youtube then go i'm missing the boat here and they start buying lego sets with credit cards they start buying quote-unquote great deals with fill in the blank ways of borrowing money with the idea that i'm this is gonna return me 11 i could sell this for $400. I only bought it for 50 and I bought it on a credit card. And that's the folks that get in trouble. If you buy these things with cash

and you end up with a huge pile of Legos in the apocalypse, it's no harm, no foul. It's fine, right? But dude, if you have a pile of debt buying these things with the hope they're going to pay off, you're just going to get

in a long line of crypto folks and a long line of Beanie Baby folks and a long line of Tulip folks and on and on and on, right? Yeah. We don't know the future of Lego. I mean, one thing could take, they could have a tweet that takes them down and the stock tanks. No, I'll keep rocking with Legos, dude. I'm all about it. But it's very, very risky. And we see this across all other industries, John. Sneakers, there's a lot of sneaker heads out there and they're buying the collector shoe and there's a lot of urgency and scarcity. And so whenever there's a lot of urgency and scarcity, I like to just pause and go,

why am I actually, why do I have this FOMO? And I go, oh, it's marketing. Got it. Okay. I don't actually need it. It's not actually a great investment. I actually don't know anything about it. And so unless you're a super Lego fan who just knows the ins and outs and knows exactly what set is what value on eBay, don't get involved in the stuff for the investment. Do it for the love of Lego. Yeah, because you want it. For the love of Lego. For the love of Lego. You have a t-shirt that says that, man. That's actually pretty cool. All right, let's go to Shannon. Do we have time to take a call? What do you think?

Oh boy, it's risky. Pretty close. It is so risky. We got a minute, John. I don't know. I don't time to take a call? What do you think? Oh boy, it's risky. Pretty close. It is so risky. We got a minute, John. I don't want to short change him. Alright, let's go here. Building wealth in this economy. We keep hearing that question and we get your

confusion. There's tons of noise out there right now about inflation, massive layoffs, investing in Legos. Not in Lego the company, but just buying a bunch of boxes of toys. Rising interest rates. You deserve answers. That's why we're coming to a city near you with our Building Wealth live event. They were sold out all across the country. Last year we had, gosh, how many did we have the other night? 100, 150,000 on that? Oh, easily.

It was wild. Yeah. Dave Ramsey and our team of personalities will be doing a Building Wealth live spring tour. We'll dig into hot topics, give you a proven plan to build wealth and keep it. Yes. Even in this madness, each building live event will have its own flair and unique lineup. Dave,

Dave, George Campbell, Rachel Cruz, and Jade Warshaw will be in Indianapolis on February 16th. Dave, Ken Coleman, me and Jade will be in Austin on February 23rd. We're heading to Salt Lake city on April 24th,

where you can catch Dave, Rachel, George, and Christina. And our last stop, Dave, Ken, me, and Christina will be wrapping up the Building Wealth Life Tour in Anaheim, California on May 2nd. Tickets start at $49. You can get a four-pack of tickets for $175.

Bring your friends. It's a blast and it's a lot of fun. Go to ramsaysolutions.com slash events to reserve your seats i noticed they didn't pair us up john we're too dangerous of a combo we are powerful when we come together it's off the rails a little bit but join us We'll be right back. This is the Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225. Let's go out to Shannon in Dallas, Texas. Shannon, what's up? Hi.

So my dad recently died, and my husband and I are going to be moving into their house with my mom um which means we need to buy a build a mother-in-law edition so we were just trying to figure out the best way to do that financially for all three of us okay let's back all the way up when's your dad pass away on the third oh my gosh so this is like right away. Yeah. In two weeks. I'm so sorry. What happened, Shannon? Pulmonary fibrosis, idiopathic pulmonary fibrosis. So right away, right away. Yeah.

Wow, man. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry. We're doing all right. So what's causing this sudden, like we have to move? Is it for mom? what's the reason behind it yeah she's lonely she knows she'll be lonely she's never lived on her own before and the house is old it was built in the 60s so she wants help for and it's on a lot of acreage so she just wants

help from my husband and i to live in a house. So a very, I'll just tell you right out of the gate, the wisdom I received from the man who trained me, Dr. Andy Young, the guy who trained me on crisis situations in response was one of my psychology professors. And then he also served as like a personal, he helped me out through some pretty messy stuff. The rule was always after a major shift, a major tragedy, do nothing for six months to a year because everybody starts scrambling and people who are on the periphery here, like you guys are, you're watching your mom, you missed your dad. It's so sudden. Everything feels like, like the, you know, what's up is down and what's down is up. And the impulse that we have, we only have, we have a fight or flight, right?

Is to start swinging at things or to start running. And the impulse is to go do a thing, do, do, do, do, do, do that. Cause that's, that's our impulse. And we will, people will take out mortgages. They'll move across the country. They'll quit their job. They'll move in. They'll move somebody in. And then the smoke clears.

The pain is still there. The hurt is still there. The loss is still there. But the smoke clears. And everyone goes, oh, gosh, what do we do? And now you've got another mess on top of a mess my greatest recommendation would be find a way to to have a in between for the next three to six to nine months and that might mean mom's just going to move in it's going to be real tight for all of us we're going to figure it out

or we're going to get a camper and move it in the driveway or something but selling selling your house, moving it, doing a big old reno, all that stuff. You don't know. The smoke may clear in six months and a couple of her friends say, hey, why don't you move over to this community and get a condo and do this? So who knows where that's going to land? The hardest thing to do right now is to sit in grief. You hear what I'm saying? It's hard just to be still for a minute and say man I miss dad

okay I appreciate that how does that sound so say yeah say six months from now we she had your awesome you're like okay that's cute all right so we're gonna build this house here's what's gonna be all right so tell me you're thinking about selling your house and moving in like tell me what you're thinking about doing. So we want to build her a mother-in-law addition. In her own house? And then it'll be connected off to the side of her house so that we still have separate spaces, but she can come visit whenever she wants to. So she's going to move out of her house and she's going to move out of her master bedroom and her kitchen and her whole world and she's going to move into a mother-in-law suite right next door or sort of attached.

Yeah. So for her, this is very exciting that it gives her something to look forward to so that she doesn't just sit and wallow in her grief. There's a lot of ways you could occupy yourself without doing all of this. She could find hobbies. So the question is, this is a lot of work and a lot of money. Do you guys have the money to cashflow this today? My husband and I are sitting on a lot of equity in our current house. So once we sell this house, we will have money to do all of that. Plus my mom has a very comfortable retirement. What's her nest egg look like? About a million. Okay. How old is she? 61. Okay. Do you have brothers and sisters? Uh, I have two sisters. It's been a very open conversation

with the sisters. We're all on the same page. Okay. What I would hate for you to do, if you just, you're just bent on doing this, we've got to do this the next two months. We've got to get it going. We've got to get it going. We've got to get it going. You have to do this. You sell your house. I want you to buy her house from her. Okay. Otherwise the whole thing gets very messy because technically y'all are homeless. Right. So we, that hadn't been what we were initially talking about, but then we started planning to worst case scenario issues, making sure we have a solution for those. So worst case scenario, my husband and I hate each other in five years and we're getting a divorce. How do we make sure that my divorce doesn't make my mom homeless? It will.

Like, should we put my mom's name on the house? Or is that a bad idea? Nope. Number one, just don't get divorced in five years. You'll work on your marriage. That's the plan. I'm more concerned with a more realistic probability is your mom passes away in two years and your sisters come and say, well, we want our peace. That's what happens more often in our world. Or your mother's cousin says, hey, she promised me X,

and she sues you for that house, and it's in your mom's name. And actually, your mom just had a will and left everything to all the kids. And now we've got a mess. And you spent 30 grand on the in-law suite, but you don't own the home. Right, and you cashed out your equity in your home

to pay for an attachment. See what I'm saying this is it's super messy and so the cleanest way is to i'll buy mom's house from you even if you sit down with your sisters and say that means that i'll take less of splitting up the nest egg when mom passes away however you need to redo the well will even if you need to sit down with an attorney get it all clear here's what we're looking for super super clear boundaries because if you own this house and let's say y'all get divorced either your husband leaves and he get it all clear. Here's what we're looking for. Super, super clear boundaries. Because if you own this house and let's say y'all get divorced, either your husband leaves and he takes a buyout, right? And we'll figure out how to pay the buyout down the road. Or you and your mom leave and he buys you out and y'all move in together somewhere else. That doesn't bother me

nearly as much as she passes away. Y'all don't really own this house it was just kind of a handshake agreement between sisters and one of your sisters doesn't like you anymore one of your sisters husbands gets them gets in some gambling debt and they need the money like who knows how this thing plays out and i know you're thinking that not in our family but george and i wouldn't have a job if that didn't happen in a lot of families. Okay. So it's just, we're just the clarity, clarity, clarity, clarity, clarity. So would the plan be you guys move into this house until mom passes and then we'll figure something out if we want to stay there? No, we were definitely leaning towards my husband and I buy the house and then my mom uses what equity she's going to get because she has, it is sitting on a lot of equity in that house.

She's going to use that money to build the mother-in-law house. Okay. Okay. But then long term, do you guys want to live there? Yes, we plan on staying there. So you're good with the next 20 years living on the property there? Yeah, absolutely. Okay.

I do want you all to have the conversation because this would be very hard i'm just i'm just thinking about myself if all of a sudden my kids were in my kitchen and sleeping in my room and i was having to go outside to go to my little apartment that whole array i would feel weird for me and I would, a possibility of possibly selling this whole property and you'll buy another place that already has a mother-in-law suite in it. Part of the healing journey. Or you live next door. Right. She might wake up in six months and be like, I need to get out of this house because everything reminds me of my husband.

That's why we say to wait and slow down. I'd hate for you to do this and her be like, I can't be in this house anymore. Now we got another problem. Now we all got to move again. But if you're bent on it, make sure everything is outlined and clear. You'll have talked about, hey, this is going to be our kitchen. It's going to be our bedroom. It's going to be our kids' rooms. Have that, it's going to be a messy, messy conversation. Or consider buying a completely separate house, selling this thing, grieving the loss of this, the passing of this. The dream you had is going to be a different dream now. And then start building something new moving forward.

But at the end of the day, she's really blessed to have you in her corner. She's a lucky, lucky woman to have you. Sorry about your dad. Sorry about your dad. We'll be right back. today's scripture of the day is proverbs 31 8 through 9 speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves for the rights of all who are destitute speak up and judge fairly defend the rights of the poor and the needy jordan peterson says when you have something to say silence is a lie i like that all right let's go to steven in springfield what's up steven

hey guys thanks for taking my call you got got it. What's up, dude? Oh, so I got a question on, um, kind of how to handle, I ended up taking on Saturdays at work. Um, so I'm bringing home about an extra $350 a week. Um, I got about $26,000 in, um, consumer debt, uh, through different loans and everything like that with different interest rates. So I'm just trying to figure out every time I seem to have extra money, I throw it across the board and I'm trying to figure out if it's better to just say, pick one, pay it off, then roll it. Or what is your guys input on something like that? So what kind of debts are these if you listed out the 26 so I've got a car credit card between me

and my wife and then I have a Peloton spin bike that has a 0% so I kind of always throw that one on the back burner and try to go after the car that has a 5.4% and the credit card that has 14%. But then again, every time I put $1,000 on the credit card, something comes up and it feels like that $1,000 is back on there. Can we agree before George walks you through it that the way you're doing it is not working? Correct. Absolutely. Yes, dude. You've already won. You've already won. Congratulations. All right. So as a fellow math nerd on paper, you're like, well, I should pay off the highest interest debt first. That makes sense mathematically. I'll pay the least amount of interest.

But what we found is that personal finance is 80% behavior. It's only 20% nerdy head knowledge. And so the way we've seen it, where people actually get this debt out of their life once and for all, is using the debt snowball method, which is ignoring the interest rate. Just cross it out. You don't know the interest rates anymore. All you see is individual balances. We're going to pay minimum payments on all of the balances except for that smallest one. And with all that side work,

all of the extra money, you're cutting expenses, selling stuff, you're going to throw that the smallest debt. It's going to free up a payment. You're going to roll it to the next one and the next one. And man, that is the fastest way. Now, is it mathematically the best way? No, you probably could save a few dollars on interest, but you'll also probably hang on to that debt for longer because it's hard to make progress. Yeah, and that's exactly where I feel like I'm at right now. And that's totally been listening to you guys more and more and just been trying to tackle it. And I figured here we are, and let's try to see what you guys input on it is.

There's something powerful, Stephen, about this. You have a debt with $500. You have a debt with $300. You have a loan to a buddy for $1,500. You got a credit card with $5,000. And you get $1,000, and you throw it at that car, and it goes down to $4,000. You still owe all the same people money.

Correct. There's something else. If you owed six people money, and you took that $1,000, and you paid off that $300 one and that $500 one, you just cut two sharks out of your life. There's something powerful psychologically. I'm actually making progress. When you just knock $5,000 to $4,000, that's a lot of money, but it doesn't feel like it because you're still paying the same people.

There's something about knocking these things out, smallest to largest, that you start to believe, oh, I can do this. And then I like it. This is me personally. I like that credit card just hanging out there, just gnawing at you. 14%. Like it just gives you hemorrhoids. There's no preparation agent site. You just got to deal with it. And it makes you, I got to get that thing out of my life, but the only way I get it is to get these other three out. And so I'm just going to, I'm going to, I'm going to power through. Does that make sense? Absolutely. Yeah. Cause I'm gearing up for tax returns and stuff like that. And my issue at hand was, all right, well, how am I going to use that money? Um,

if I do get any, or I always try to break even, but you know, some years you end up getting something back and I'm just hoping that if I do, I want it to use it in the right way instead of year after year feeling like I'm just putting $1,000 across the board. And like you guys are saying, I still have three other debts that just have a little bit lower of a balance. Yeah, dude. You know what to do. Man, commit to this debt snowball and you're going to be debt free in no time.

Very cool. I appreciate that. You got it to do. Man, commit to this debt snowball, and you're going to be debt-free in no time. Very cool. I appreciate that. You got it, brother. Hey, holler at us when you get all these paid off, man, and we'll celebrate with you. Let's go to Parker in San Antonio, Texas. What's up, Parker? Hey, guys. How are you doing?

Excellent, brother. What's up? So I'll get a bit of a predicament I'm in about a long commute for my wife. So we are recently married in September, and she moved in in San Antonio. And so I get a job. I kind of work all over the San Antonio area in the hospitals. But she got a job in Fredericksburg, which is about an hour away. Yep, wine country, man.

Beautiful area. Yes. Yes, it is. Very beautiful out there. But right now, you know, we're making some good money, but all of her paycheck seems to be going towards her gas bill. You know, she drives a truck up to Fredericksburg every day and back and forward and back. So it's two hours at minimum a day. So we've got a lease that's ending up in May.

We're renting right now, and we're looking pretty heavily to go ahead and buy a house. Caveat being is the closer you get to Fredericksburg and that beautiful wine country, the more expensive things get. That's right. I will tell you there is some research that has some correlation between length of commute and all sorts of physical and psychological challenges.

Your body knows that you're driving 75 miles an hour in a metal missile down the road and that you are relying on everybody else on the road to not do something dumb. So you don't all end up in a huge like your body knows as much as we just hop in the car and that you were relying on everybody else on the road to not do something dumb. So you don't all end up in a huge, like your body knows as much as we just hop in the car and go and it wears you out and it wears you out and it wears you out and it wears you out. Um, my personal rule is 30 minutes and, uh, that's, that's pushing it. I think when I just look at the overall psychological wellbeing of me and my, and my relational wellbeing with my family and my friends, I just, I, my time is so precious, especially if you throw kids in the mix. Time is so precious. It's the only thing on earth we can't get back.

And to spend an hour or two hours in the car every day instead of face-to-face with our loved ones or connecting with other people or work, whatever the thing is, man, that's a sacrifice that I think long-term just doesn't add up. I would love to see y'all rent until you can afford to buy a place, man. How close are you guys to being able to afford that? Are you guys debt-free with the emergency fund? So my wife has got about $15,000 left on her truck. She's been making good progress on that. She'll be able to pay it off sometime in the next two years. But together, we've got about $80,000 saved up. We're recently married, so we haven't quite combined finances and stuff like that. But we've got about $80,000 saved up,

thinking about putting either $50,000 or $60,000 down for a down payment. Okay. Well, we've got priorities here, which is we're paying off the debt. Is 15 total, all the debt you guys have? Yes, that's it. We paid off today. Before the day is over, pay the truck off. This is not her truck to pay off. This is y'all's. You're married. Everything's one. Pay the truck off. And then you guys need a fully funded emergency fund of three to six months of expenses. Would you call that 1515,000, $20,000? Yeah. Okay. So, $15,000 on the car, $15,000 for the emergency fund. That leaves you with $50,000 now towards a down payment. And so, now we go, what's the goal for the down payment? How quickly can we save up and be able to afford a house near her work? And if that means we need

to save up for another year, we're going to go rent for a year. Great. And I think that'd be wise for y'all to move closer to Fredericksburg area, rent and find out exactly where you want to live. Vibe it out. Or get to meet some real estate agents and find a great deal that will come up in the next year. And it might mean getting a condo or a townhome, even though you really wanted the single family home closer to the, it's going to have to take some compromise, but it's worth it. Can I challenge you on something, Parker? Yeah.

What's up? You're newly married. You got to be fully all in. You got to put all your money in the same checking account. You got to share visions. You got to share goals. You got to share finances. Her debt is your debt.

Her truck is your truck. There's no more of this. You pay that off and I'm going to pay this bill and her gas bill. It's y'all's gas bill. You got to start living like that, planning like that and create a life together. Not these two independent lives and live like roommates that just make out. Okay. Let's, let's go all in on this marriage. Let's do it together. You got this. Hey, this is the Ramsey show. Another show in the books. We'll see you soon right here, live from Nashville on The Ramsey Show. Hey, George Campbell here. If you love the show and you want a deeper dive on your money journey, we've got a weekly newsletter that gives you helpful articles and tips on following the Ramsey

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