The Ramsey Show - App - My Ex-Husband Lives in a House That's in My Name (Hour 3)

Episode Date: September 8, 2020

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studio, this is the Dave Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and your money. I'm Chris Hogan, and joining me as co-host is Anthony O'Neill, national best-selling author and millennial expert, and we are very excited to be working with you and talking to you. Anthony is also a Ramsey personality along with me. And we love helping people. Typically, we will be traveling all around the country, flying around, burning up, getting just airlines and airports and all the things.
Starting point is 00:01:01 But guess what? Well, yeah, that, and we're here. And so you have an opportunity to be able to help people, help companies via webinars. And so we've had to pivot in order to get in front of people doing the webinars and have an opportunity to interact on Instagram, using social media. I've got my Everyday Millionaire Facebook group that is also
Starting point is 00:01:25 available. You can go to facebook.com slash ChrisHogan360. Click on the group section and join Hogan's Everyday Millionaires. These are all people that are on the journey to becoming everyday millionaires. People are in there from age 18 to 80, but it's about community. It's about being connected and having people to cheer you on. Anthony is all over Instagram. YouTube has been blowing up the videos and stuff that he's putting on. You can find him at Anthony O'Neill on there as well. What's the latest video you have up? Man, it's actually a good one, man.
Starting point is 00:01:59 I did a video called 20 Things Every 20 and 30 Year Old Needs to Know. And I really walked through the five things that they need to be doing right now so i definitely want to encourage everyone to go over to my youtube channel uh youtube.com forward slash anthony or just drop in anthony o'neill in the search bar and you will see this video already got about 10 000 views in less than 24 hours because i really lay out everything that i wish someone would have told me when i was 18 19 or even when i was in my mid-20s and to even to things that i've learned from you and dave in my mid-30s yeah and so i put all that stuff into a list and um you'll get five on the video you gotta watch the video because i give you a text in number
Starting point is 00:02:41 to where i'm going to text you the other 15 things that if you do these things in your 20s and 30s, by the time you hit your 40s, you will be going on to the Chris Hogan tribe to join an everyday millionaire movement. That's really cool. Did you poll people and find out what are the things they wish they would have known, or did you just talk about from your own experience? Really, I just went from my own experience, Hogan, and just really listed out everything that I've learned from you, from our Cuban, from Dave, to some of my other mentors. That's really cool. And just said, hey, this is what every young person needs to know. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:13 You know, the cool thing about that is, you know, you may have people out there that don't have men or dads or uncles in their life. And so to be able to share that content is fantastic. Again, Anthony O'Neill on YouTube. search him, find him, check out that information. It's a great opportunity. All right, here, we're going to get to the phones because this is what we do. We've got Tamara on the line. Tamara, how can we help you? Yes, thank you so much for taking my phone call.
Starting point is 00:03:38 Yes, ma'am. I made a really horrendous sexual mistake about eight years ago, and it's come back to kind of bite me. Okay. And I'm just not sure what to do. I got married, moved to a town where my ex-husband was, bought a house, realized when we had to apply for the house that he had bad credit, so I put it in my name. Got divorced three years after that. Was upside down on a house. So we made a verbal agreement
Starting point is 00:04:10 that I would move back to where I'm from and he would take over the payments. He would just pay me rent and then take care of the house. All's been good until this week when he tells me that the roof is leaking into the dining room and the basement flooded. He said because of COVID that his hours have been cut and he can't afford to
Starting point is 00:04:35 fix it, but he will once his hours get back up. So our agreement was that he would eventually, if I couldn't sell the house once I got out from underwater, that he would eventually, if I couldn't sell the house, once I got out from underwater, that he would, um, work on his credit and buy it from me, which, um, that hasn't happened.
Starting point is 00:04:53 Um, but he said his brother might could possibly co-sign for him next year. So there seems to be a lot of promises, but yeah, not sure what to do. I should take out a loan if, um, to fix it or to, you know, I just you know, I just want to get rid of it.
Starting point is 00:05:10 No, I know. I know. And in the midst of this, you know, this is a couple of things on top of each other, right? You've got the failed relationship. Then you have the failed part of him to do what he said he was going to do. And then you also have this other third thing called regret. Okay. And it's real. I mean, as you look at it, I think the main thing now is, is let's move in a direction
Starting point is 00:05:35 that gives you concrete path, but also concrete clarity. Like we're not going to rely on any more verbal or any more innuendo or hope we're going to do the things that put you in the right position. I would reach out to the lender that you have the mortgage through. I would begin to walk through them the scenario. This home, how much do you think it's worth? So I owe $94,000. And last, about a year and a half ago, I had a real estate agent to look at it, and he said that he would list it for around 80. Now, this is before the, you know, damages done with the flood and the... How do you owe so much more on it?
Starting point is 00:06:16 Did you all take out a home equity line of credit? No. I just, I think, to be honest, I think I way overpaid for the house. Okay. I didn't know what I was doing. I understand. I understand. And not trying to beat you up over that.
Starting point is 00:06:33 I think the main thing is getting clarity because we don't know what it's worth. The main thing is what you're being told by your ex who's living in it is that there's water damage. I would reach out to that lender today. I'd begin to have conversation and dialogue with them. This may be, Tamara, a thing where you're walking through a potential short sale with them. And short sale simply means that you end up working with the bank to get their approval to accept less than what's owed on the home.
Starting point is 00:07:03 And in this scenario, okay, this is a process, it may take three months for you to get approved for that. You are going to have to walk through the scenario and communicate clearly. I would ask your ex for pictures of the water damage, pictures of the roof, so you can show the bank and let them know you are not living in it. There's a tenant there that is your ex. And begin to just lay out the cards. I think it's going to be important to talk to that institution and for you to take notes on who it is you speak to. But you're going to have to advocate for you in this.
Starting point is 00:07:36 Ask them about their short sale process. And if they won't do a short sale, then you can ask them about the second one. And that's a deed in lieu of foreclosure. A deed in lieu of foreclosure is simply you voluntarily turning over the home to them. And, you know, this is, again, all of these things are going to be based on you communicating clearly with them. Call them today. So, Hogan, let me ask you this question. If she would have called in about before she left, before she got a divorce,
Starting point is 00:08:03 what would you advise her in this situation? Should she sign something with her husband or sell the house? before she left, before she got a divorce, what would you advise her in this situation? Should she sign something with her husband or sell the house? No, I would actually, in that scenario, if I could have called her back before all of this, it would be a matter of, obviously, in the legal agreement and the divorce decree to get everything laid out in writing. Quick claim the deed. It had to be signed over by a certain period of time.
Starting point is 00:08:23 But again, it's neither here nor there. This is where we stand. Contact the lender. Communicate about a short over by a certain period of time. But again, it's neither here nor there. This is where we stand. Contact the lender. Communicate about a short sale or deed in lieu of foreclosure. You can do this, and we're here to help. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. Yes. families all over the country are discovering a faith-based and budget-friendly way of meeting health care costs whether they're anticipated or completely unexpected. For example, take the Olcheski family from LaGrange, Texas.
Starting point is 00:09:08 Jeff and Carice had just celebrated the birth of a new baby boy. Shortly after, they had another expensive medical issue come up. They could have faced a huge financial setback. But thanks to Christian Health Care Ministries, the Olcheskis were spared from a ton of medical bills. As members of CHM, they're part of a group of believers who financially and spiritually support each other. CHM is the longest serving health cost sharing ministry and is a Better Business Bureau accredited charity. It's Christians helping other Christians, and it shared nearly $97,000 to help the Olcheskis. To be a part of Christian Healthcare Ministries,
Starting point is 00:09:45 visit chministries.org. That's chministries.org. CHM is a proud sponsor of Dave Ramsey Live Events. Hello, everyone. You are listening to The Dave Ramsey Show. I'll tell you what. It is always so good to meet real people here in the lobby. Okay? We got some Texans out there, some Californians, got some people, and just hanging out. I said, what brings you to Tennessee? They said, you.
Starting point is 00:10:20 I said, I ain't believing that. I'm not believing that. They're just trying to make me feel good. And it did, too. It worked. It was good to see you guys. Good to meet good people. If you're ever here near Nashville, I want you to come by.
Starting point is 00:10:33 Melissa has Baker Street Cafe over there where she's got fresh baked goods, amazing coffee, as well as a bookstore over there. So you can come by, grab some items, grab some gifts if you want. We'd love to see you here. Now, real quick, because we love feedback. We value the input from the listeners, those that have the right things to say. I'm just kidding. But it helps us to know what's important to you and so we can deliver the right kinds of content and teaching. Last week, we launched a brand new survey and would love your feedback. So check it out at DaveRamsey.com slash survey.
Starting point is 00:11:14 It'll only take you a few minutes, and there's a $100 Amazon gift card up for grabs. So that's pretty cool. Also, you can text the word survey to 33789. Text the word survey to 33789 or visit DaveRamsey.com slash survey. Again, if you want to take it on your phone, just text the word survey to 33789 or visit DaveRamsey.com slash survey. We always love to hear the feedback and know kind of what's on your mind. So, all right, let's get to the phone. We get to go to Miami. A.O., you ready?
Starting point is 00:11:41 Yes, sir. All right, here we go. Christian in Miami, Florida, how can we help you? Hey, guys. Thank you so much for taking my call. Been listening to you guys all year, nonstop, every day, catching up on old episodes and everything. So really grateful.
Starting point is 00:12:00 Me and my husband are really grateful for everything that you guys do as a team. You guys are amazing. Well, thank you. So really quick on our end. So we started this year with the program, I want to say at the beginning of the year, but, you know, the first month is always a little difficult. So we started in February, like full on. And so I started doing, you know howave always says like deliver pizza deliver this do
Starting point is 00:12:27 as much as you can yes so i started doing a door dash and um getting a few like fifty dollars maybe a night depends on depending on the day uh after that i started doing a few, like, balloon decoration stuff, and that kind of started taking off on its own. And right now we actually even have, like, storage for things because it's gotten to a point where we can't hold it anymore at the house. And we're looking into even buying a car. And we're in into even buying a car. And we're on baby step, too. So my question was, we are, like I said, we started this year. We just paid off already like $17,000 in debt, like credit cards. We just paid off our car.
Starting point is 00:13:17 Great. And we're going to, we're working on student loans. We have a long way, $151,000 in student loans. We both went to private school for art, and we're working hard to try to get rid of it. So the business, my side of the business is taking off, and we're thinking of getting an SUV because we have a Nissan Altima and we have grass walls and a bunch of balloons that we have to deliver sometimes and it just doesn't fit in there. Sometimes we have to take another car or rent a car. Right. smart idea to put the money that we've been putting aside for that into a car or into the student loans that we have planned already to save. Right now we have, we do have an emergency
Starting point is 00:14:13 fund that we don't touch. Um, and we have $6,000 to save aside for a car. Um, we know we're not getting a brand new car. We just need to get a bigger car. Christian, are you talking about getting another car or are you talking about selling the Nissan and just getting a van and you use your van for your personal and business? What are you talking about? Having two cars or still just one car? Well, we're kind of looking at both right now. We've gotten a quote for our car from Carvana, and they're offering $12,000 for it. That's 2008.
Starting point is 00:14:53 Okay. Which is not bad. How much do you owe on it? You say you just paid it off. Okay. We just paid it off last month. What does Kelly Bubluk say the value of your car is worth if you privately sell it? Oh, I'm not sure.
Starting point is 00:15:07 Okay. I would have to look that up. Yeah. So that's the very first thing I'm doing. I'm going to KBB.com. I'm going to look up the trade-in value plus the private sale value. I am not a fan. Okay.
Starting point is 00:15:19 I am not a fan of two things. One, you have $6,000 in your savings account. Now, you say you're saving that for a card for your business. Okay. A little bit there. Here's what I'm going to recommend. Your debt, paying off your debt is your number one priority. Number two, if you want to sell your car, okay, sell your Nissan and take that and maybe
Starting point is 00:15:40 add on a couple of grand so you can get a van. I have no problem with that. But what I do not want you to do is to keep your Nissan and also just wipe out all your money that could have went towards the debt to buy a second car. Yeah. Hey, Christian, watch this, Ayo. How often is it that you have to pack the grass walls or fences,
Starting point is 00:16:01 whatever you said you had? It could be every other week. Like, example, next week, we're booked Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. And it comes and goes. Right now, like, if I look at profit-wise, like, there's months that we could be booked completely every weekend, and there's months that we are booked every other weekend. Right. And you said right now
Starting point is 00:16:25 as you bump into that scenario if it's needed you you rent a car yes yeah a.o keeps saying van yeah a.o keeps saying van you never uttered the word van you said suv didn't you yes and that means expensive UV. Okay? How much are you talking about spending? You quit chuckling. I knew. I was listening to you.
Starting point is 00:16:52 How much are you thinking about spending? Well, I was looking at a 2017. No, you weren't. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Stop right there.
Starting point is 00:17:02 See, Christian, I was trying to help you out, Christian. You need to start with a 19-something. You're looking for a 1999 Astro Van. Now, wait a minute. With wood pan, hush your mouth, A.O. I'm just playing. Christian, here's the deal. Here's the deal.
Starting point is 00:17:17 I love that you guys are hustling. I really do. I like that you're making stuff happen. But here's what I want you to make happen. I want you to make this debt shrink. You follow me? My concern is, and A.O. has hit the nail on the head in talking about, if you can sell your car for $12,000, I'd much rather you go find a $10,000 SUV, something that you can run into the ground and hustle. I just think whenever I start to talk to self-employed people, especially like you, like you're a salesperson, I can tell.
Starting point is 00:17:49 Okay. I really can. I think you could sell me some suntan lotion. I really do. I feel like you could. I feel like you could, but I got my A game on. But I think people that are self-employed, they'll always be able to rationalize doing something else, right?
Starting point is 00:18:04 Like being able to divert from the plan. So, Christian, I want you to do this. I want you and your husband to sit down and talk. I want you guys to look at this situation and say, hey, what's in the best interest of our family? Like if we're being real, not like straight up, like if we're trying to make sure we're moving in a direction as a family for the sake of our kids, for the sake of our business, what's the smartest play for us to do?
Starting point is 00:18:26 Not the preference, not what you like, but what's the smart thing? And I think looking at it through that lens where you go, hey, if we do this and we get this SUV, now we're going to move forward. We're not rationalizing buying anything else. We're going to stay plugged into this and we're going to attack this debt. The beauty of being self-employed is you don't have caps on your income. There's nobody giving you a limit saying, hey, it's all you can make. You get an opportunity to take the sky to the limit.
Starting point is 00:18:52 And so that's what I want you guys to do. I want you to make this decision together, looking at it, being intentional and say, hey, let's make a two-year decision. I want to make a decision now that I'm going to look back on in two years and I go, boy, I'm glad I made that. I'm glad I was uncomfortable for a little while so I can be effective later. It's a difference. You can do it, Christian, and we're here on your side.
Starting point is 00:19:13 This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you. Hello, everyone. You are listening to The Dave Ramsey Show. I'm Ramsey personality Chris Hogan, and joined by fellow Ramsey personality Anthony O'Neill. We're excited to be here with you to be able to take your calls and talk about the things that are on your mind. And so you can call us. That number is 888-825-5225.
Starting point is 00:20:15 Again, that's 888-825-5225. Or you can find us on social media. You can find Anthony O'Neill at Anthony O'Neill on YouTube, Twitter, Instagram. The same with me. You can find me at ChrisHogan360. And you can also follow The Ramsey Show. Have a great opportunity. And I want to give a shout out to
Starting point is 00:20:36 our Dave Ramsey Show YouTube group that are highly active and have a lot of thoughts, is the way I'll put it. But we appreciate their support as well as opinions. And so we appreciate people listening in and tuning in, realizing our jobs to help people get better. All right, we're going to get to the phone line.
Starting point is 00:20:58 I've got Jamie on the line calling from Evansville. Jamie, how can we help you? Hey, guys. Thank you so much for taking my call. You're welcome. Thank you for calling in. Yeah. So I have a question about baby steps 3A and B that I'm working on. Just need
Starting point is 00:21:16 advice on kind of how to figure it out. Just a little back story. I'm recently divorced. I have four kids. I was a stay-at-home mom for five years and in order to get a mortgage for my house that I live in now, I have to have six months of employment history. So my mom helped me out and used a home equity line of credit to get the house that I'm in. Her and I have an agreement that in a year, I will buy it from her. So currently I have $15,000 in my savings, which would cover my
Starting point is 00:21:55 emergency fund. And I have an account, and this is my question, I have a Janus account that has just under $29,000 in it. And I didn't know if that was a wise decision to cash that out to use towards my mortgage. Okay. All right. And so Jamie, tell me this. What is your, what is your income right now? I actually just started about a month ago and I've, about $1,600 a month. Okay. And so did you say your mom used the home equity line of credit to buy a home? Yes, to buy the house I'm in now. That you're in.
Starting point is 00:22:35 And what is the mortgage payment on that? Right now, I only have to pay the interest, which is about $350 a month. But the mortgage would be anywhere between like $700 or $800. Okay. How much is the house? It was $126,000. Okay. $126,000.
Starting point is 00:23:02 So she has the home in her name. The goal is, is at some point you're going to buy it back? Yes. Okay. After I get my employment history, yeah. Right. And how old are your four kids? They are eight, six, four, and two. Goodness gracious. Okay, you're busy. Busy. Got your hands full.
Starting point is 00:23:22 A little bit. Tell me this. When you opened up the Janice account, why was it opened? I believe this was opened whenever I was a child. Okay. By either my grandpa or my mom. Okay. All right. You don't owe on anything else?
Starting point is 00:23:39 Right. Okay. Your vehicle is paid for? Paid for, yep. Okay. All right. No emergency credit cards? None. Okay. Your vehicle is paid for? Paid for, yep. Okay, all right. No emergency credit cards? None.
Starting point is 00:23:47 Okay. In looking at this, here's the deal. You're in no way in any position to be trying to buy a home right now. The good thing is that your parents have taken a step. It's not the preferred step, but they've taken a step that allows you to have some consistency and some stability in your life, correct? Right, right. Okay. Now, the track you're on career-wise, what are you doing?
Starting point is 00:24:15 What kind of job are you doing right now? Right now, I just have, like, an entry-level position at a hospital here where I live. I'm currently going to school for medical coding, so that's my goal, and I'll be done with that in November. Okay. And who's watching the kids while you work? They go to a daycare. Okay.
Starting point is 00:24:35 Who's paying for the daycare? I am. Okay. How much is daycare? It is $3.65 a week, but the money that I get in child support covers that. Okay. All right. So here's what I do. You know, the money in that Janice account, if you told me you had, you know, $20,000 in credit card debt, you know, this was non-retirement savings, I would talk to you about attacking it. I see this money, you know, that's sitting there, you know, gosh, it's almost cushioned.
Starting point is 00:25:09 I would not use it for the house. I really wouldn't. I think you've got time. See, you're not dealing with a landlord. You're dealing with your parents. Right. And I think the most important thing you have to do is really begin to walk this path of being newly single, right? At the same time, being a single mom, having a lot of things that are on you.
Starting point is 00:25:30 But I think slow down. You know, like the kids, I know in your mind you're thinking the kids need a house and they need this or that. No, they need their mom as well as their dad. And I think slowing down to just breathe a little bit to figure out what do you need to do now? What's the stuff that Jamie needs in her life? Whether it's taking the time to meet with a counselor. Being plugged into a church.
Starting point is 00:25:53 Where you realize, hey, I need to get the right people around me right now. As I go through this time of healing. To kind of breathe and regroup. Right? Because you got four people counting on you. They're eight, six eight six four and two yeah man i agree with you i think the key thing she needs to get on the plan she needs to really write down what's a clear vision where is she going and work that plan and then also she needs
Starting point is 00:26:15 to have a conversation with their parents and let them know that plan like hey mom and dad um i talked to chris hogan and anthony o'neill over at the dave ramsey show and i'm just really not in a position to move quickly as I wanted to. But here's where I'm going. Here's what I'm expecting. Are you all okay with this? Thank you so much for your help. I want to fix this.
Starting point is 00:26:33 But before I can fix this, I need to fix myself and my kids. Yeah, no, I'm with you. I think you're absolutely right about having that clear communication. And it sounds like, obviously, your parents support her. Yes. Have her back and to be able to talk about it and really kind of be clear and be upfront and honest uh you know what the big thing is too is i want you to make sure you're spending time with these kiddos especially the eight and six uh year old just so they're able to talk about and be clear
Starting point is 00:26:59 about what they're feeling with this newness yep um and the tendency might be to throw a lot of stuff at them. But I would tell you this. I think the time you spend is going to be more crucial than the stuff, giving them an opportunity to think about what's going on and kind of what they're feeling and where they are. So thank you so much for reaching out. All right, we're going to get to the phone line. We've got Rome calling in from San Diego.
Starting point is 00:27:23 How are you? Hi, I'm good. Good, good. What's your question for Anthony? Well, it wasn't a question specifically for him or anybody. I mean, I was recommended to you guys by a friend of mine. He told me to give you guys a call. He said you guys are a radio show.
Starting point is 00:27:41 You help people with finances. So, yeah, I have, like, a lot of debt, and I've been kind of struggling a little bit. But I moved down here to San Diego and started off with, like, a $15,000 personal loan. And, yeah, I got an $18,000 credit card loan and the $9,000 credit card. And I just bought this car last year for like $24,000.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Goodness. Yeah. What's your income, Rome? What's your income right now, annual income? Well, I make about $70,000, $70,000, $75,000 probably. I make about $6,000 a month. Okay. But I lose about $1,000 of that in expenses.
Starting point is 00:28:37 So I bring home about $5,000. Okay, so you bring home about $5,000 a month, and you're up there in debt. Hey, you know, as a matter of fact, we want to spend some time with you. I want you to hold on. We're going to come back to you right after break because we're going to walk you through this process, all right? So hold on, Rome. Yeah, that's kind of cool. Said a friend told him some financial dudes he can call.
Starting point is 00:29:00 And you know what? Based on that knowledge, that's exactly what he did. Rome, hang tight. We want to unpack this and help you get on the plan that we know, without a shadow of a doubt, it will work. Stay tuned, everybody. We're coming back. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. I don't care
Starting point is 00:29:25 I don't care Hello, everyone. You are listening to The Dave Ramsey Show. Before we went to break, we were talking to Rome. And Rome has a financial situation. He said he had been listening to a friend. A friend told him to call in. There's some financial dues that may be able to give him some guidance. And guess what?
Starting point is 00:30:03 He did call in. So let's see here. Rome, are you still there? I guess we lost him. Uh-oh. Uh-oh. But, you know, Rome, you... Okay, Rome, you there? Okay. I don't know what happened to him. But, you know, the key thing...
Starting point is 00:30:22 Let's see. We gotta try it one more time. Rome, are you there? there yeah I'm here all right buddy good good good so okay you had called in you had laid out you had $15,000 in personal loan $18,000 in credit cards another thousand then a $24,000 in a car do you have any other debts um no no. Not that I can. All right. Well, this is what we're going to do. First, I want you to go back and thank your friends for suggesting you to give us a call
Starting point is 00:30:53 because they gave you the right information and gave you the right people. All right. So with your income in right now, here's the very first thing you need to do is you need to get on the plan.
Starting point is 00:31:03 All right. And that plan is called Financial Peace University. So when we get off this phone, I want you to sit tight. We're going to put you back on the phone with Kelly. Kelly is going to go ahead and process that. And I want you to sit down once a week for nine weeks. I want you to learn from myself, Chris Hogan, Dave Ramsey and Rachel Cruz. We're going to walk you through everything because we can't do that here in three minutes on the phone call.
Starting point is 00:31:24 But the very next thing you need to be doing right now is from stop borrowing money. you through everything because we can't do that here in three minutes on the phone call but the very next thing you need to be doing right now is rome stop borrowing money okay we want you to stop stop no more credit cards yeah cut up your credit cards um as a matter of fact you what kind of car do you have right now um one two of them are Citibank, and the other one is from Chase. You have three cars? Are you married, Rome? Cards. Oh, cards.
Starting point is 00:31:52 Oh, okay. How many? Credit cards. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay. I'm talking about your car. What kind of car do you have right now? Oh, car. Oh, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:31:58 I misunderstood. It's a Honda Civic Sport 2019. How much do you owe on it? I owe about $17,000 less on it. How much is it worth? How much is it worth? From what I looked up, it said around that, like around $16,000 to, well, that's like selling it personal.
Starting point is 00:32:21 If I sell it to a dealership, I think it's like $14,000 or $15,000. Gotcha. Do you have any money in the savings right now, Ro? Unfortunately, I don't, no. Okay. All right. So that's the key thing we're going to really help you out with, man. We need to walk through the process and give you a solid foundation. I don't like the fact that you're in a car note right now,
Starting point is 00:32:39 but we do need to figure out how we can maybe over the next few months save up about $3,000, $4,000 in cash so that we can buy a cash car so you can sell this car. And that eliminates $16,000 to $17,000 in debt right there off the top. But we're going to walk you through the debt snowball process. We're going to walk you through the whole journey of Financial Peace University. But, Hogan, this is a great phone call. We love these kind of phone calls. Rome, tell me this.
Starting point is 00:33:05 How long have you been stressed out about this debt? It started when I was 17. My parents told me to start building credit. My first card I got was like a six thousand dollar balance and i i you know i didn't know a thing about money i i just bought i filled that card up pretty quick and uh right yeah yeah i just realized i can't trust myself with credit cards so i i haven't used one in like one month like maybe like eight months i months. I haven't used any of my credit cards. I've just been trying to deal with it.
Starting point is 00:33:48 Hey, and you know what? That's the key, man, is to really stop. Do you have any kids or family near you? I have a daughter. I don't have any family. I mean, I moved out here to San Diego to raise my daughter. I'm here with my family up in the Bay Area. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:06 How old is your daughter? She's seven. You love that little girl? Oh, very, very much. Yeah. I heard you as you said it. I want you to look at that little girl, and I want you to say that you're going to help her have a future. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:23 Okay? Yeah. Right now. She's a little motivated in a future. Yeah. Okay. And right now. Yeah, I see. She's a little motivated in the end. Yeah. Oh, I bet. And she's about to motivate you a little bit more if you keep listening.
Starting point is 00:34:31 I want you to look at her and tell her you want her to have a legacy and you're going to give her one. And her daddy's going to show the way. And I want you to make a decision about things that are helping you and the things that are hindering you. No more tiptoeing around it. We're going to be really clear and help you to kind of recenter. You need to get some people around you as well.
Starting point is 00:34:53 I don't know where you are on your Christian walk, but I would hope you can get plugged into a church. I've been to San Diego. They're all, they got them, but you need some people in your life too. You didn't get here overnight, Rome, right? This was a process of, like you said, 17 years old, your parents telling you you had to start credit. You know, they were passing on what they thought was wisdom.
Starting point is 00:35:14 It's not. What we're going to do is plug you in with Ramsey Plus. We're going to give you an opportunity to begin to see this stuff differently. As we talk with people, and we're talking about the thing that goes against the cultural norm, okay? The credit card companies want you to believe it's normal. They want you to worry about the points.
Starting point is 00:35:32 They want you to worry about the miles and your credit score. We don't because we know better, and we want to help you. You didn't get in this debt overnight. You're not going to get out overnight, but we are going to show you a path that if you walk it, and you walk it clearly, and you stay focused, that little girl will have a legacy because
Starting point is 00:35:49 her dad is going to provide her one. And so again, just be plugged in. Kelly's going to get your information. We're going to get you plugged into this. And again, you're going to have to change your thinking. I love AO that he said he wanted to stop the credit cards because he didn't trust himself and he hadn't used them in eight months. See, that to me is somebody that's willing to make a change.
Starting point is 00:36:07 And so you can shut them things down, Rome. And again, just give yourself some time, right, to be able to unhear some stuff so you can learn some new things. It's crucial. Today's scripture comes from James 1.12. Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial. For when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him. Again, that's James 112. And then we have a quote, work hard at your job and you can make a living. Work hard on yourself and you can make a fortune.
Starting point is 00:36:42 And that's from Jim Rome. You know, this mindset, A.O., of where we are right now in this country, a lot of tough things happening, a lot of difficult things and a lot of challenges. I think it's really important for us to make sure that our mindset, right, of what it is we're saying, not worrying about what people are saying about you, but more importantly, what are you doing for yourself? And I think it's really important for people to be stronger than ever as we deal with this trial and tribulation of this pandemic. Man, you're absolutely right. I'm doing a lot of self-study in Hogan.
Starting point is 00:37:16 And I'm learning that it's easy to remember the past and not focus on the future. We spend so much time on this happened and that happened rather than saying this can happen, this will happen. And we can control the future by making proper and wise decisions today. So although the pandemic is impacting our yesterday and even some of our today's, what can we do? What choice can we make today that will impact tomorrow? And we all can make choices that will impact our tomorrow for the best. And we got that from the last phone call. I made a choice that I'm not going to swipe any more credit cards because I don't trust myself and I don't want to let down my daughter. She was my number one influence. That was a choice
Starting point is 00:38:04 that he made today. It's going to change us tomorrow. And we all can do that, Hogan. Well, I completely agree. And the caller before who dealt with some life change, not anything she predicted or anything she would have anticipated, but it's a matter of what are you going to do about it? And I think, you know, looking at it, I tell people a lot, A.O., that it's hard to be hateful when you're grateful. Yes, sir. And I think it's important for us, even in the midst of trials and tribulations, to find something that you're grateful for. Who are you grateful for? Who are the five to ten people that you go, boy, I'm sure glad I have them in my life.
Starting point is 00:38:34 I want to encourage you to reach out. Be proactive. Make a list of those people and do a check-in and a check-up on them. Get on there with family members and use technology for our advantage with Skype and FaceTime to be able to see family. I know you may not be able to get to them like you used to, but let's look at them and be able to see their faces because something can change. And I think, no, we've got a lot of time in this year.
Starting point is 00:38:59 This is September. This is the second new year. What we have is a new opportunity ahead of us. Let's grab it and do it the right way. I want to thank Zach Bennett, producer. I want to thank Kelly Daniels, associate producer. I want to thank AO for taking the time to hang out, buddy. This was fun.
Starting point is 00:39:13 Hogan, thank you, man. And I want to thank all of you all for tuning in and listening. This has been The Dave Ramsey Show. Once again, you made The Dave Ramsey Show one of the top four most popular podcasts last year. To get your daily dose of motivation and inspiration from the Ramsey Network, subscribe or follow today wherever you listen to podcasts.

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