The Ramsey Show - App - My Husband Is Addicted to Fantasy Football Gambling

Episode Date: September 10, 2021

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Thank you very much. Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studio, this is The Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and your money. I'm George Camel, and I'm joined today by Ramsey personality, Dr. John Deloney, host of the Dr. John Deloney Show, aptly named, and best-selling author of Redefining Anxiety. It's open phones this hour, 888-825-5225, and it's a free call.

I don't know that we'll ever start charging, but hey, if things ever go down, John, not a bad idea, right? I'm not good enough to charge. You're right. You get what you pay for here. Maybe when Dave's back. But we'd love to take your call on money, on life, on relationships, on mental health, on where to get the best deals, on where the best tacos are in Nashville. We're a wealth of knowledge, John.

I don't even know where that is. My house. I'm here for you. I am here for you. So we're going to have fun today, John. This is our first time co-hosting together. Momentous. This is your first time driving. That's even more momentous. Well, when Dave's gone, we just go, what can we screw up around here? Right? That's the goal. Not me, George. I like to think, how many people can we help? But I'm glad that's the attitude you're bringing today. That's a much healthier perspective. This is why you're the mental health guy, John. I need your wisdom just as much as the callers today.

I only have two degrees. I can't help you, George. You're right. Well, we're going to have some fun today, and we're going to kick it off with Nathan. He's on the line in Atlanta, Georgia. Nathan, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hey, thanks for having me. Absolutely.

How can we help today? My question is, I'm 22 years old, and I just got my real estate license this year, and I've made a little over $120,000. Golly, what a year to get your real estate license, man. Yeah, I know. I live in a really touristy neighborhood in North Georgia. And you're just wheeling and dealing, huh? Yeah.

I have a lawn service I've done in college and I got out of it college because I was making about $80,000 a year cutting grass. Good grief. You're not scared of work, that's for sure. Yeah, I worked real hard and i had about 120 clients and i've you know about 20 houses sold the first year last year uh when i went full-time into it and i said i need to get some skin in the game so

i went and got my real estate license this past winter and started selling houses cutting grass just a little bit. Good for you. So I've made about $150,000 since February. That's incredible, man. Awesome. So, brother, how can we help, man? Well, I'm trying to save some money up to pay cash for a house in the next couple of years.

And like I said, I've saved pretty much everything I made this year, so I got a little over $100,000. And I was trying to see where can I stick this money for now to try to gain some interest or invest this money now so I can pull it out when I'm ready to buy a house. Because I just want my money sitting in the bank account, you know, and it ain't making me nothing. Sure. So let me ask you this. Do you have any debt currently? I bought a Subaru Outback when I started real estate. I took a loan out on it. How much do you have on that loan? I've got about $40,000.

You've got $40,000 on the Subaru. Do you like the Subaru? Yeah, I love it. I used to have a Mustang when I was in college. You like cars. You're a car guy. I respect that. I love it. I used to have a Mustang when I was in college. You like cars. You're a car guy. I respect that. I got three.

Oh, my goodness. Gosh. So the only debt you have is the 40K Subaru. Is that right? I got about $12,000 in mowers. So I'm about $52,000 in debt. Okay. But you have $100,000 sitting in cash in the bank.

Yeah, over. I have about $120,000 in debt. Okay. But you have $100,000 sitting in cash in the bank? Yeah, over. I have about $120,000. Okay. $120,000 saved, and you've got about $52,000 in debt. What do you say you become debt-free before we start tackling this house? Yeah. I thought about that. I really did.

It's just the mowers are 0% interest. You know, so I don't want to get rid of my cash. I get that. You are running a high liability business. You are going to enter into a season in the winter where it may not rain as much, it may not be as much mowing, or it takes one month of low rain to affect this, and then there can be one market downturn, and suddenly your $120,000 as a real estate guy turns into way less than that.

And so you don't need to be saving for a house on one end and trying to scrounge up one percent or two percent interest somewhere and at the same time paying out on um your subaru and i know it feels good to have zero percent on your mowers man but there's still a liability they're depreciating asset liability against your business you're gonna have to replace them you have to upkeep right so pay all that crap off be debt debt-free today, and then you've got $50,000. And the way you work and as hard as you work, man, hopefully you will be able to scratch that back together here soon. Nathan, what's the payment on the Subaru every month?

$670. Nathan, you're too smart to pay $670 a month to a car dealership. I only put like $3,000 down. Don't tell me that because I was just going to say how smart and wise you are. I know. We were about to compliment you, Nathan. And here's the thing. You are going to win with money, but you need to draw a line in the sand where you say, you know what, I'm just not going to be the type of guy who has payments.

That's it. And once you draw that line, you are going to be the type of guy who has payments. That's it. And once you draw that line, you are going to be so incredibly wealthy because every single dollar you have coming in, and you are really good at bringing those dollars in, aren't you? It's going to stay with you, which means you're going to save up for that house so much faster. You're going to feel the progress instead of giving seven, eight, $900 away to lenders every month because you're pumped on 0% interest. I want you to become the bank, Nathan, and pumped on 0% interest. I want you to become the bank, Nathan, and you can do that, but I want you to pay off this debt. You're going to have almost

70K left over to start getting this house. And if you want to get a 15-year mortgage, that's fine, but clearly you want to pay for this thing in cash. And you're not going to get there with payments in your life. And here's the deal. If you want to save up money, if you're going to be bringing in, if you think you're going to keep crushing it that way, I know how your mind works and you are always looking for the next dollar and the way to maximize this and to leverage that against that. Take that money and stick it in a money market account and let it sit. This isn't about growth money. This is about buying a house money. If it's going to sit for two or three years, put it in a money market account.

It's way, way, way less volatile. It's going to be safe there. And it's just going to be waiting for you when you're ready to buy that house, right? Yeah. Nathan, I'd park that at a money market or high yield savings account online. If you want to do that, you're going to get about a half a percent right now, which is boring. But you know what's not going to happen? It's not going to disappear because you wanted to invest in Dogecoin because you could double your money next month, right? So Nathan, you're a hardworking guy. We're rooting for you. I just want you to be debt-free today.

And when you have money in the bank like that, John, I'm like, what do you do? Make the call right now. Get off the phone with us and go pay off this debt. Be debt-free today. And again, it's so hard when you're a hard charger and you're a maximizer. I'm going to move this to this,

and that's 0%, and I can balance that. It feels like you're winning. And like you said, at the end of the day, $900 a month are leaking out the back door to pay for mowers. All depreciating assets, right? Yep. And you're making Subaru rich. You're making John Deere rich.

You're making Home Depot rich. Make Nathan rich. Make Nathan rich. Make Nathan rich. I love this. I'm going to get that on a t-shirt. Make Nathan rich. Be debt free before the day is over, Brother Nathan.

I want Nathan to pay for those t-shirts, though. He's got money. He can afford it. Send them to us, Nathan. We're not paying you back either. I love it. We've got more of the Ramsey Show coming up. Stick around. Hey, it's Christi Wright.

Y'all, let's be honest. When it comes to our quiet time with God, sometimes it's hard to know where to start. You've heard me talk about the Glorify app before, and there's a reason. For me, it has been a game changer, helping me grow in my faith every day. Every morning, Glorify guides me through God's Word with a bite-sized Bible reading, a daily devotional, and a guided reflection that helps me connect with God. And it's free to download. So if you haven't already, give Glorify a try.

Just search for Glorify in your app store. I'm George Campbell. I'm joined by Dr. John Deloney. This hour, open phone, 888-825-5225. Give us a call. We'd be happy to help you. We'd be happy to yell at you. We'd be happy to give you a hug.

Whatever you need. Whatever they need. You can't hug anymore. That's true. I'm not really a yeller. Occasionally. You know me, John. I'm so aggressive.

No. It sounds like a little dog barking when I yell. It's very different like a shih tzu like exactly or like my french bulldog which i know you love we got through almost two whole segments before you mentioned that dog someone's having a drinking game at home saying how long i'll go without mentioning my i hope they're not because they're gonna need liver replacement all right let's go to the phones we We've got Armin in Los Angeles. Armin, welcome to The Ramsey Show. Hey, guys. How's it going?

Great. How are you? Pretty good. So I just had a quick question. Before I get into the question, let me get some backstory. So I'm 18 years old. I got a part-time job, and I also balanced that job with studies at university. The only form of liability that I have is a lease payment of $250 a month, and the auto insurance is paid for by my father.

So I kind of wanted to ask, with the part-time job that I have, I bring in about $ thousand dollars a month. So I wanted to ask how do I, because I also wanted to incorporate the every dollar budget and just kind of follow it. And I was wondering, is the emergency fund separate from the savings and the investment? So say, is the emergency fund itself the savings or is it separate from the savings? So like every month I would need to put aside money for investments, savings and emergency funds, or would the emergency fund already be the savings? And then also another thing, as of right now, I have about $7,500 saved up and my tuition expenses are covered by the university financial aid. So I'm just wondering, bringing in about $1,000 a month, $7,500 saved up right now,

how much should I be setting aside for the every dollar budget app? How old are you, man? I'm 18. Where did you learn to work so hard and to have such a vision for what tomorrow might look like?

I mean, honestly, I like to think that in this world that we live in, universities say degrees and whatnot, although they are losing their value, I still want to hustle on the side because I'm aware of the fact that although I'm pursuing my studies, I'm not doing it for the degree rather because I enjoy the studies themselves.

I'm studying philosophy. Did your parents teach you this or did you just make a decision one day that I'm going to be a guy that hustles and grinds and gets it done? Whereas I'm telling you, you're a really impressive 18-year-old. You're asking some sophisticated questions that millions of 50 and 60-year-olds in this country have never asked.

It's impressive. It's really, really impressive. If your old man and your mom taught you this stuff, kudos to them. If you saw the way that they had done life and decided you were going to do it differently, kudos to everybody, man. And kudos to you, but good for you, man. Yeah, that's awesome. So let's talk the money side here. You've got $1,000 coming in every month, and you have $7,500 saved.

And you raised a great question. The emergency fund, is it separate from savings? And the answer is yes. Your emergency fund is for, you guessed it, emergencies. So I don't want you touching that unless you have a legitimate emergency with a flat tire, there's a medical issue. Your savings are going to be for your other goals, right? So if you want to save up and pay cash for a car, you want to save up for a down payment, and then your investing is going to be separate. And we teach a process around here called the baby steps.

And so we teach to have a $1,000 starter emergency fund in baby step one. Baby step two, we're going to pay off all of our debt from smallest to largest using the debt snowball regardless of the interest rate. And that's everything but the house. which right now I doubt you have a lot, right? If you have $1,000 coming in every month and you're doing all right. And so you probably right now have, you probably could be at Baby Step 3. My concern here is the lease. You have a leased car that has a $200 50-month payment. Is that right? Yeah. So I guess some backstory on that. So I really wanted to get like a used vehicle, 2014, but my dad is very traditional. So he kind of, one day i came out of work and he

impulsively had bought the car the leased car uh so i was kind of stuck with the car i'm like well now i guess my dad went and impulsively bought the lease so now i'm kind of stuck like i don't know if i should be he impulsively got a lease car for you in your name yeah it's in his not under my name no in his name but he he wanted it for me so but you thought i would be such an inspiring gift that he got something that you have to pay for every month exactly that's true love right there so um what would it look like for your relationship if you said dad i'm going to be debt free i've got 7 500 bucks i have a thousand dollar emergency fund i'm going to go buy a 3 500 honda accord or a camry that's going to get me to and from school and i would like to no longer be paying on this lease

uh the relationship would be not hard to maintain but there there would definitely be some, I guess, difficulties trying to explain that to him because he's a very traditional man. That's cool. I get that. And you're doing something that's very untraditional, which is taking ownership of your life and your money, right? Yeah. Yeah.

And I got one quick question before I turn back over to George. You say everything's covered by a financial aid office. Are you taking out a bunch of student loans, or are you being paid for with Pell Grants and grants and other types of scholarships? No, everything that is provided for my tuition is debt-free. It's grants and scholarships. And I'm fully, yeah, I despise debt. So once my dad got the car, I was in shock.

What's the terms of this lease? How much longer is it? So it's three years. And I guess the not really enticing part, but one thing that kind of didn't make this situation seem so bad is my dad offered to cover all of the insurance. So the lease is actually $320, but my dad is willing to pay some portion of that, and only I pay $250 lease. So he's trying to make the situation better. Listen to what you just said, though. This is not so bad.

My dad's going to pay $100 of this, and I only have to pay $250 of a thing that I didn't even want or ask for. And I know that you're doing your best to rationalize the gift that you give, and I know that car is nicer than a whatever, but you are in a messy situation here. Back to your question about budgeting, Armin. If we can get rid of this debt, maybe you find out the payoff amount, maybe you talk to your dad and figure out a situation to get this car out of your life. I drive a car that cost me $6,000. It's the nicest car I've ever driven.

And in your situation, you're doing great so far. And if you can get through college debt-free, I don't want you concerned about making some crazy investments right now. I'm more concerned about investing in yourself as you get through college. And if you can save up a pile of money when you graduate and you're debt-free, man, you're going to be so far ahead of almost every American. So that's what I want for you. And part of that is getting rid of this debt. Part of that is having that emergency fund of three to six months of expenses. Right now, you don't have many.

But once you graduate, you may get your own place and you're going to have a job. You're going to be making a lot more than $1,000 a month. And you're going to have to have these habits in place. And so I love that you're thinking about how do I budget and balance this all right now. And the key here is we want to list out all of your expenses and make sure that your income minus your expenses equals zero. And if you get rid of that lease, you just got a $250 raise every single month until you graduate that you can sock away into savings for whatever that next goal is. Maybe it is to pay cash and upgrade the car if you get a car once you get rid of this lease.

Maybe you want to put a down payment on a house. And I see you're calling from the LA area. That's going to take a lot more money than it would in Idaho. And so you're going to have to make some big strides here financially once you graduate. And you can do that, but I want you to do it debt-free and I want you to do it through the baby steps. And there is this illusion, you just mentioned it,-free, and I want you to do it through the baby steps. And there is this illusion.

You just mentioned it. So if we're throwing dollars amount, I think I bought my car that I drive right now for $14,000 because I'm a baller compared to you. Baller. The car that got me through college was $1,000, right, for four years. There's this illusion that to be safe, you have to get a brand-new car or a lease. Or when you make this much money, you have to have a car that's like this. When you get this job, you have to have this car. You just don't. It's not bad to have a great car, man.

If you can go in there and write a check for it, it's incredible. And it's awesome. I grew up the same way. My dad wanted me to have a safe, reliable, new car. That's right. Right? It's being a good dad. But being a good dad also means not putting your kid into debt.

We're cheering you on, Armin. You got this, man. This is The Ramsey Show. I'm sure most of you have seen the news recently about ransomware, cybercrimes, identity theft, and more and more data breaches. If you thought it was bad before, let me tell you, it's gone off the charts and it's out of control. It's impossible any longer to just bury your head and hope it doesn't happen to you. Today, it really is a matter of when it will happen, and not if. We all live in this cyber world and need to make sure we have the best protection possible without wasting money. That's why Zander's ID Theft Protection Plan is the only one I've ever recommended.

They combine smart cyber protection and prevention services to help reduce your risk, and their team of dedicated experts takes over the work if you become a victim. They even provide $1 million in stolen funds protection, and kids are free on their family plan. Go to Zander.com or call 800-356-4282. 82. I'm George Campbell. By my side is Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality. And on the line is Mary in Denver, Colorado. Mary, I see on my screen you are debt free. Yeah, that's it. That's me. Congratulations. We love to hear it. Mary in Denver, Colorado. Mary, I see on my screen you are debt-free. Yeah, that's it.

That's me. Congratulations. We love to hear it. Okay, how much have you paid off? I paid off $41,800. You broke up on us, Mary. Try talking directly into your phone there. $41,841 in 18 months.

Wow. And how long did this take? 18 months? 18 months. And what was your range of income during that time? It started at $85,000 and went up to $95,000. $85,000 to $95,000. Way to go, Mary. What did you do for a living?

I worked in property management. In what kind of management? Property management. Property management. Outstanding. Awesome. So what kind of debt was this? You know what?

It was all consumer debt. And I didn't learn this until I did financial peace, but I had credit card debt. I got a consolidation loan, and it did what the class taught, is it doubled the debt that I had. Oh, my gosh. So that's how it got up that high, yeah. So this was all credit cards? Yeah.

Mary, what were you buying? I'm really intrigued. This must have been a fun ride. It was fun. Oh, my gosh, I had so much fun. Computer, car repairs. I did a fun ride. It was fun. Oh my gosh, I had so much fun. Computer, car repairs, I did a road trip on the credit card without knowing or knowledge of how to manage a budget or anything. So you're having the time of your life living off of credit cards. What happened 18 months ago where

you said, all right, the ride's over? So it was kind of about the early 2020 and I started to really get nervous just watching the news and seeing everything going on. And so I was Googling on my phone, like how to get out of debt. And I remember I was like up all night. I found Financial Peace. I did the free trial and I think I binged three episodes like that first night. And then I like that opened up the whole world for me. And yeah, that's just how I got started. Wow. You seem like whatever you do, you just go all in. If you want to have some fun, you're all in on some fun. You're $42,000 in. And then you decide, you know what, I need to get out of this thing. What was that shift in your heart that changed where you said, I don't want to live like this anymore?

Yeah, it definitely was first like a wake-up call, like taking that accountability. So one of the things that really stood out to me was just the ability to be able to walk away, like walk away from like a toxic job or walk away from, you know, you know, just having that empowerment was really big for me. Um, and then another part was like kind of letting go of the shame of it. Cause for so long I kept it a secret. I kept it a secret from my family, my friends, like nobody knew that I had this huge burden I was carrying around. Um, so coming to that community was huge for me.

How did you, how did you free yourself from that? Because shame is one of those powerful, restrictive agents that keeps us in the dark and holding on to secrets and just collapses our spirits and our physical bodies and our mental health. How did you let that go? I told somebody. So, well, the first person I talked to was actually like a preferred Ramsey coach. I like put a question in, was so surprised when someone reached out to me and I had a phone call. And then the second one was my sister. Like, I just trust my sister so much. And I told her on the phone, I was like, Liz, this is how much that I'm carrying around with me. And like, she just had no idea. And I think her on the phone, I was like, Liz, this is how much debt I'm carrying around with me. And, like, she just had no idea.

And I think it was first just being vulnerable and telling somebody. That's really what helped me to start letting go of it. That's the magic when it comes to shame is putting the secret out in the open, right? And being heard, being vulnerable for that first time. Did your sister respond to you with, you idiot, I hate you, and I wish you were never my sister? No, not at all. She was like, I'm here. She was my accountability partner. She's like, I'm here for you. Call me if you have questions. Call me if you need support or whatever. And I celebrated all my wins with her. So that was really good. I love that. I love to hear it. So what was the key for you, Mary? What was the key to getting out of debt?

The budget. Like, it sounds so simple, but it's so true. And it really didn't make sense to me until I did the classes, and then I used the EveryDollar app, and it just clicked for me. And it's just like, it seems like magic. It just worked so well for me. Just using a budget, that's the key. I love it. How old are you, Mary?

I am 31. Wow, 31. You used a word that's somewhat of a swear word among 25 to 30-year-olds, and the word you used was accountability. What's something you would tell to 25 to 30-year-olds across the country? And by the way, just between you and me, to the 45 and 55 and 65-year year olds across the country and by the way just between you and me to the 45 and

55 and 65 year olds across the country how do you how do you come to a reckoning with accountability when you have to look mary in the mirror and say enough's enough um it was kind of like you know um you made this mess and the only way you're to get out is if you get yourself out of it. What? You should run for Congress. Run for Congress. People this smart don't run for Congress, John. Oh, well, that works.

Oh, Mary, we need more Marys in the world. Good for you. This is awesome. How does it feel to be debt-free? It's so cool. It's awesome. It's fun. Like, I have, like, all of the money coming in.

I'm on Baby Step 3. It's, like, mine, and, like like I just get to transfer that over to savings. That's so cool because like when I was budgeting, one paycheck, you know, was like all to debt. And now that paycheck is like mine. So it just feels awesome. Yeah. It's a lot more fun when you do it on your terms and you're the bank and you don't have to make payments on the fund once you get home. Right.

Yeah. So true. And I see you like to travel. On my screen, I see pictures of you traveling and you've got dogs. It seems like you just want to live life to the fullest and you can do that even more full with no payments, right? Yeah. That's true. Like I said, one of my trips, it was awesome, but that was the one I found the credit card. But now when I travel, I don't have to be guilty or I feel like I have a plan. I'll feel in control. Wow.

Yeah, I'm excited. But Mary, you're losing out on all the travel points. Oh, my gosh. How are you going to pay for vacations now? You know, I stayed up for it. It's so much better that way. I didn't know you could do that. Mary, you're weird. Mary, you're weird.

Well, we're so proud of you, Mary. We've got a copy of The Legacy Journey for you. That's absolutely the next step in your story. And you're 31 years old. You are going to leave a legacy. You can be so outrageously generous for the rest of your life because you don't have payments and you get to call the shots. We also got a copy of The Total Money Makeover for you to pay it forward. Give it to a friend who's having some fun right now, racking up $42,000 in credit card debt, and maybe they can be where you are 18 months from now. How's that sound? Awesome. That's so awesome. Thank you. All right. Well, let's get to it. We've got Mary from Denver, Colorado, $41,841 paid off in 18

months, making $85,000 up to $95,000. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one. I'm debt-free! Woo! Yeah! Woo! Way to go, Mary. That's how it's done, John.

I almost felt you raising the roof next to me. I haven't felt the roof raised. I wanted to raise it. I'm not tall enough to raise any roof at this point. I appreciate you giving it a shot, Roof Razor. That was incredible. I do it in spirit. There's so much in there. We could unpack that on the play-by-play for days, John, but I'm just so pumped to hear from people like Mary, people who are my age,

going, you know what? There's another way. It doesn't have to be this way. And this idea of looking in the mirror and saying, I have a mess. I have to say that out loud. I've got to call someone that I love and say, I've really screwed up and I made a mess and I'm going to have to get myself out of this. And I hope you'll walk alongside me. And most of the time, the people we love will, right? And then you take responsibility and you just get after it. Yep. It's hard to look in the mirror, but I think a lot of people had to do this,

especially in the last 18 months with this pandemic, they can't not look in the mirror, but I think a lot of people had to do this, especially in the last 18 months with this pandemic. They can't not look at the mirror, and they're looking at this house of cards that they've built where everything's built on payments. And if one thing falls apart, their life is destroyed. Yeah. It's built on comfort and what's going to make me feel good right now, right now, and tomorrow. And the bill will be – that's a next month problem. Yeah. That's October's issue. Next month me gets to deal with that.

That's exactly right. This month me gets to eat a fancy burrito and some avocado toast or whatever. That's what it's all about. Well, I love seeing young people get a hold of this stuff, take accountability, and take personal responsibility for their lives and realize that they are in control.

That's what this whole show is all about, is getting back the control. Take your power back. You can do this. You can be the next Mary to call in and let us know you are in control. That's what this whole show is all about, is getting back the control. Take your power back. You can do this. You can be the next Mary to call in and let us know you are debt-free. This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you. Our question of the day comes from Blinds.com. Find out for yourself why Blinds.com is the number one online retailer of custom window covering.

You get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you'll save even more. You can use promo code RAMSEY to get the best deal. Today's question comes from Sandra in Virginia. My husband and I have been married seven years, and this is the second marriage for both of us. When we first got married, he was in several fantasy football leagues and did not work full-time. He's been working full-time for four years now, and he's cut back to one fantasy football league. He's cut back. He's cut back. He's cut back. That's a great language. I have no issue with watching games.

However, the 15-plus hours a week that goes into following pro football is a bit much. Growing up, my father frequently bet on horse races, losing quite a bit of money and time to this addiction. Because of this, I'm very much against gambling, as I've seen it destroy people and families. Could you please set the record straight regarding if buying into brackets and or fantasy football is a wise financial slash life choice? Oh, Sandra, Sandra. I've got a bunch of friends in my life that are like your husband.

Oh, man. So we can answer your money question here. This is very much not a money question. This is a conversation that y'all two need to sit down and have on a couple of different levels. One level being, regardless of what the issue is, fantasy football, watching football, cooking, I want to go back to school, I want to quit my job and start a calligraphy business, whatever it is, something is setting off an alarm system that you have. It's been there since you were a little girl because of some behaviors that your dad did. And the old, you marry your unfinished business is often true, really often

true. And you've married your unfinished business. And now you've got alarms setting off because your husband reminds you a lot like your dad, and you've lived in the aftermath, right? You've had to live in the ashes of the life that your dad, gambling and destroying families, destroying people, being addicted, losing a lot of money, all those things. And so, number one, you have to recognize you're dragging your past here. Your body's responding to stuff in the present that happened in the past, and you've got to be honest with yourself about it,

and more importantly, you've got to be honest with your husband about it. And that is number two, which is your husband's hiding and running from something. He is living an alt life. They call it fantasy, right, just because it doesn't have elves and mushrooms and dragons flying around. Using other grown men as pawn pieces instead of being married. I'm not against fantasy football. If that's what you want to do, rock it on.

But living in that world instead of living in the real world, which is your wife and your kids and your home, is a problem. It's a distraction. It's an addiction. It is numbing out. It's disappearing, right? So there needs to be some sort of conversation where both of you all get away from this, not in a fight. Don't bring this stuff up when you're already upset, but getting

away and saying, Hey, what's the, what is the picture of our marriage? What is our vision for this thing going to look like? Because right now I'm losing a lot of hours to you, to pretending you are a coach of pretend teams using real other grown men as the player pieces, right? And so I think y'all got to get away and have some hard, hard, scary conversations about what connection looks like for you, what a relationship looks like for you, what football versus hiding versus entertaining versus running, what that looks like. You'll need to have a hard, hard conversation. And, George, when it comes to is buying into brackets or fantasy football

a wise life financial choice, I don't like to look at it like that as much as it's a hobby. It's entertainment. Yeah, it's a game, right? So if you're going to put money aside for going to the movies or going out to dinner, it goes in that category until it becomes I got four leagues and I don't see my kids. I don't hang out with my wife because I'm in the basement. It's a part-time job.

That's exactly right. And so that's what worries me the most, even more than any money spent here. I don't know if it's hundreds or thousands of dollars. I mean, we have some people around the office. They like to do a bracket. It's fun. They throw in 25 bucks and it's just a fun thing. And to me, I'm like, okay, okay that's great if you can budget for that and you're debt free and this is fun money coming out of your entertainment part of your budget that's okay i don't know that he can get there right now if he can just leapfrog to that point because this does feel like addiction level um and i i would question is the priority here marriage or fantasy football and at 15 hours a week i don't know that he's seeing much of his wife is

if he's working full-time right and so no there's nothing wrong with fantasy football. And at 15 hours a week, I don't know that he's seeing much of his wife if he's working full time. And so, no, there's nothing wrong with fantasy football. And yeah, it can be a really dumb financial choice if you're sinking money and time into this thing that could be better spent elsewhere. I'm sure you guys have other financial priorities over using pawns in a football scheme with 25-year-old dudes. I mean, it just feels like there should be more to life than this. And I'm not against sports, right? People spend a lot of money on sports and going to games and season tickets and all that stuff's fun, but not when it takes over your marriage. Right.

And I'm a man, I'll be the first guy, I'm one of the loudest voices in the country about, especially with men, need to get together and hang out with friends and be together with friends. In reality. In reality. Well, if fantasy football binds you together, great, man. Have some guys. But y'all get together once a week, right?

You get together. And fantasy football is awesome for some really remarkable long text message threads where everybody's talking trash and everyone's bringing up all the high school stuff. Everyone's getting into it with each other. That's a blast. When you are spending 15 hours, 20 hours a week researching and studying and trying to get the insides in on the sub, sub, sub Reddit threads. Getting all the stats.

Yeah. And your wife is sitting there saying, what about me? Yeah. Yeah, that's a relationship problem. That's tough. All right, let's go to the phone lines. We're headed to Phoenix, Arizona. Tristan is on the line.

Tristan, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hello, gentlemen. How are you doing today? Doing great. How can we help? Yes, sir. I have a question, a concern in my debt. I'm currently in the Air Force.

I've been serving for about three years. Thank you so much, Bryce. Thank you so much for that. Well, thank you for your support. It definitely means a lot. So my question, like I said, pertains to my debt, and I currently want to know the best process of essentially getting out of my debt.

I've actually been in debt since I was 16 to my own account. I was a binge spender in high school. Hey, we're coming up against the clock, so let's get right to your question, man. Yes, sir. You've been a big spender and you've got a lot of debt. Yes, sir. So my question is, I have $25,000 in debt with my truck

and my grandfather's $6,100. How much do you make? He's the one that helped me gather my debt. I make currently $28,000 a year. Do you have any savings? Anything in cash? No, sir. It's pretty much all been going to my truck debt.

Is your truck... Yeah, you got to sell the truck, brother. You got to sell the truck ASAP. What is it worth? It's worth $20,000. The value definitely is under. Sell it by this weekend and take that $5,000. I'm sorry, you're going to have to take out a loan for that $5,000

and then you're going to get $1,000 on top of that and you're going to go get take out a loan for that $5,000, and then you're going to get $1,000 on top of that, and you're going to go get the smallest, junkiest, but safest to and from car. Then you're going to be down to $11,000. So right now, what you owe, $31,000, right? You'll be down to $11,000 by Monday? I know that's hard to hear, Tristan, but you're in a really tough financial spot. There's not a lot coming in. I would also see if we can get that income up at $28,000.

It's going to be hard to make progress on any of this. I mean, your truck is worth about what you make in a year, and so that frightens me. And so I'd go to check around, do your due diligence and research, go to Vroom.com and Carvana and CarMax and local dealerships and see who's going to give you the best offer for this truck so you can be as little underwater as possible. And to cover the difference, like John's saying, you can go to your local credit union and take out a small loan to cover that difference so that you can get out of this underwater truck.

And then we can deal with paying off Grandpa. But we've got to get a $1,000 emergency fund here because you're going to keep staying in the cycle if you don't get out of this thing and have a buffer between you and life. You're just running up against it every time. Tristan, are you living on base? I just actually moved off of base. Currently, I can't live on base because it would actually take more for me than give away.

Okay. Does your housing allowance cover your room and board? Yes, sir, it does. Okay, good. So this $28,000 is just paying for your internet and your food and your car, right? Correct. Okay, cool. Yeah, dude, you're going to be that guy rolling up to work at the Air Force in a crummy old car,

but that's what it's going to take for you to turn this thing around and change a lifetime of bad behaviors and then create something new for yourself, my man. Absolutely. Tristan, we're rooting for you, man. You can use the debt snowball to get out of this thing. That is what we teach. You can Google and find out all kinds of things about that if you've got this, man. Hey, it's been a fun hour, John.

I agree. We've got a few more to go. Thank you for agreeing with me. I want to thank producer James Childs, associate producer and phone screener Kelly Daniel. We'll be back. This is The Ramsey Show. Dave here. We just launched a brand new listener survey.

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