The Ramsey Show - App - My Husband Just Left Me and I'm Trying To Get My Finances Together (Hour 3)

Episode Date: August 27, 2021

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Thank you very much. Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studio, this is The Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and your money. I'm Christy Wright, and I am joined today by my good friend, George Camel. We are and your money. I'm Christy Wright and I am joined today by my good friend George Camel. We are taking your calls. 888-825-5225. If you have a question about money, we are here for you. If you have a question about life, maybe a relationship question, a tough decision you've got to make, a career question, a side business, small business question. Y'all know before I was talking about time management, life balance, I was talking about

business, still talking about business. We have our business boutique conference coming up in October, but I love to help you. So maybe you have an idea and you're not sure if it could be a business or you have a business and you're feeling burned out or you're not sure how to monetize your idea. Give us a call. 888-825-5225. George's new podcast called The Fine Print is out. Wherever you listen to podcasts, he is exposing the lies, the myths that are keeping you broke and stuck. He is helping you know what you need to know to be set free from that. And I am just loving the titles of these podcasts. They are sassy. They are direct. He is just taking on some of these industries that are keeping you down.

And you need to listen to it. So the fine print is available wherever you listen to podcasts. And most of you guys know, but the new book from me, Take Back Your Time, The Guilt-Free Guide to Life Balance, is available on pre-sale. By the way, the Goal Planner is out as well. So we just launched that last week. We're not really talking about it that much yet. But it did sell out early last year.

It always does. It sold out particularly early last year, George. And people were messaging me, mid-December. People get angry. Is there any way? Is there any way? Can you find one?

Is there one hidden? I might buy them and resell them on eBay for like $1,000. I think you could. That might be the move. People are like, can I have the one that's in the back of your bookshelves at your Facebook Live from home? I'm like, no, you can't. Well, there's a reason, Christy. It's not just a normal goal planner. It's not just a calendar. You put so much content and thoughtful effort into this goal planner. And that is why people love it. Well, thank you. And

you're right. You know, one of the interesting things, so I'll give you guys a little family talk here, a little behind the scenes, pull the curtain back on Ramsey Solutions. I like to share with you guys, not just why we do what we do, but even how we do what we do, kind of behind the scenes that y'all may not see. So when we were first having discussions,

I guess four years ago, five years ago, about a planner, I knew that there was a whole group of people that really use planners. We're big goal oriented people here. We teach people to have goals. And I was like, there's such a connection there between the market that needs a planner to help them with goals. And we love goals. We teach goals. We've got to do this. But to be honest, many people don't use just a paper planner. They use their phone, they use their apps, their calendars, their digital calendars,

and that makes perfect sense. I get that. So I thought, well, what do I use? Well, I read books for personal development and growth and leadership. I do Bible studies that will have journal questions for reflection. I use tools and templates for things, whether it's for my social media, for work or for even goals, goal trackers and that type of thing. And so I was like, and then I use a calendar. So I was like, how can I combine all this? So literally, we took all of those pieces and put them in that. So every month has teaching, that's the book piece of it, teaching on a different

aspect of your life, from your, the power of your mind to your relationships, your resources, your money, and so on. All the way to you've got the actual journal questions to help you put that into practice, you've got tools and templates to help you live it out. And then of course you have your monthly and weekly calendar. You even have a month in review where we're going to review how this month went before you set goals for the next month. So this is a great tool to help you actually stick with your goals next year. We launch it in August to give you plenty of time to buy it, get your copy before the year is up to get ready for next year, get it for Christmas, get it for a gift. And then also it's one of those things that because it does sell out, you want to get it early and we want to give you time to do that.

So you can get the 2022 goal planner from me at ramseysolutions.com slash store. Get your copy early because they do sell out every single time. All right, let's go to Kendra in Nashville, Tennessee. Hey, Kendra, how are you? I'm okay. How are you? Good. What's going on?

First of all, thank you for taking my call. And I'm going to try and explain this the best way that I know how. My husband just recently left me for another woman, so I lost his income. But I've decided to get on Dave Ramsey's bandwagon here and contacted all my creditors. A few years ago, we had bought a lemon of a car and voluntarily surrendered it. The original cost of it was just over $7,000, but they're willing to forgive it for a little over $2,000. But they're only accepting payments for three months.

So do I go ahead and try to knock this out now, or do I need to treat it as a debt snowball, or what should I do? I don't know what to do. Kendra, I'm so sorry that happened. Thank you. I hear your question about money. I'm so sorry that happened. I can't imagine the heartbreak, the betrayal. I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve that. Nobody deserves that. Thank you.

I want you to know that you're strong. I want you to know that you're going to get through this, even though it doesn't feel like it. It will not hurt this bad forever. You will get through this. You will be stronger. You will. And you are worthy through this. You will be stronger. You will. And you are worthy of love.

And this is not a reflection on you. At all. This is a statement of him and who he is and his character. Not you. And I want to start there. Okay? Thank you. I want you to get that in your head and your heart. I want you to write it down.

I want you to be listening to podcasts. I want you to be reading scripture. I want you to get in a church. I want you to be around amazing friends. I want people to love you and grab you by the shoulders and look you in the eyes and tell you that again and again and again as many times as you need it as you get through this, okay? That's number one.

Okay? Second of all, okay? That's number one. Okay? Second of all, yes, get rid of it. Pay it off as quick as you can. Get those people. Get that car. Get the paperwork. Get the headache. Get the risk.

Get it out of here. Get the memory of that. You get it out of there. And then from there, you organize your debts, smallest to largest, just like we teach. But yes, you get it out of there.

But I just, the number one thing that is important to Kendra right now is taking care of Kendra. The number one thing. You're not going to be able to manage your money. You're not going to be able to make good financial decisions. You're not going to be able to manage your money. You're not going to be able to make good financial decisions. You're not gonna be able to do anything unless you take care of Kendra. So we're going to take care of Kendra. I want you to stay on the line and I'm going to have Kelly give you a membership to Ramsey Plus. That is our platform where we have

all of our teaching, all of our tools have all of our teaching, all of our tools, all of our content, everything that helps you walk out these baby steps that's going to love you, encourage you, and give you the tactical teaching you need to do the baby steps

as you walk this out. But even as you do this, I want you to remember what I said. The first thing you need to do is take care of you. You need to get around people that love you, that are going to the first thing you need to do is take care of you you need to get around people that love you that are going to speak truth to you and remind you of just how valuable

you are how worthy of love that you are that this is not about you this is about him and you're going to get through this this is the Ramsey Show. It continues to amaze me how identity thieves keep finding ways to use our own identities against us. Not only did they commit crimes related to financial fraud, medical ID theft, and insurance benefit fraud, but now we have to deal with home title fraud.

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when you're struggling with money it's easy to tell yourself that you'll deal with it later or you'll start fresh in the new year, but then later rolls around and you still feel out of control. Don't wait around and wish you would have started earlier. Decide right now that this is the last month you will ever worry about money again. If you do, if you're ready, we're here to help. That's why for this month only, we're knocking $30 off a 12-month membership to our most impactful, life-changing money classes and products. With the Ramsey Plus membership, you'll get access to Financial Peace University, our step-by-step plan to save money, pay off debt, and build wealth.

Plus, you get the premium version of our every dollar budgeting tool to help you put that plan into action and take control of your money. You deserve a life free of monthly payments and constant money stress. Start your free trial of Ramsey Plus today by texting trial to 33789. That's trial to 33789. You guys have heard us multiple times today, George and myself, giving away a year membership to Ramsey Plus. And there's a reason for that. It's because it is what will help you get control of your money. It's not just a random coincidence that we're talking about it, that when people call in and they have a question and they're confused or they're lost

or they're stuck or they're hurting, we go, hey, you know what? Stay on the line. We're gonna give you a gift of Ramsey Plus. It's because it is the class, the budgeting tool, the app that is going to get you out of the mess that you feel like you're in with your money and help you break free and build

wealth. That's why we talk about it. That's why we want you to get it because it will help you build wealth and get out of debt. That's trial to 33789. Text trial to 33789. You can start a free trial. Try it out. No risk. You don't have to pay anything if you change your mind. But give it a try. All right, we're going to go to Jerry in Atlanta. Hey, Jerry, how are you? I'm doing quite well. Thank you very much.

I hope the two of you are doing well as well. Yeah, what's going on? My question relates. We're at baby steps four, five, and six. And both are in our close to retirement age. I'm 65. My wife is 60. And we've done quite close to retirement age. I'm 65. My wife is 60. And we've done quite well staying debt-free.

We've got our retirement set up. We have an opportunity to move back to where we actually came to Atlanta from. And looking at that, I'm seeing that we would make enough from the proceeds of our home to be able to pay cash for a home in the state we want to move to. The challenge that comes into play there is probably doing the right thing at the right time moment, because in order to do that, we will be putting about 850 miles between us and our two grandsons that live here in the Atlanta area. They're 35 miles away. We would then be about 850 miles away from them. However, there is the opportunity for us to take what we would have been paying for a house payment and just sock that away and make

that be part of kind of a fund that we could use to, you know, bring them to us and have them stay for lengths of time or us travel back here for lots of time. So it's kind of a dilemma for us because it's kind of a challenge. We have family and friends back in the other state as well. But this one is kind of a tough decision. And I just kind of wondered where that balance might sit for you. That is hard, Jerry. What are the ages of your grandkids? Six and four.

Okay. Well, I'm going to ask you a question, and it may not be a clear answer, but it's just a good exercise even if it's something you have to think about after we get off the phone. So when decisions are hard, and they often are, you know, in my book, Take Back Your Time, I actually give eight different questions to ask yourself when you're faced with a tough decision. And you don't have to ask all eight of them. That would be super overwhelming. But they're examples of things that can help you as you wrestle through decisions. One of the questions that I want to ask you, this is an example from a book, but I want

to ask you in light of this situation, which will you regret? Now, the reason I ask it that way is because sometimes it brings a different level of clarity when you fast forward and project out into the future and imagine your life in this scenario. We've stayed in Atlanta. We're paying more for, and we're with our grandkids as they grow up, or project out the other scenario, we've paid cash for a house, we're with some friends, but our grandkids are far away. Sometimes when you project out in the future and you look back on the decision through the lens of which one would I regret, it brings

a different level of clarity. So I want you to think about that, Jerry. Is there one that comes to mind or rises to the surface when you look at it through that lens? Yeah, and I think we've thought about that numerous times as we've been wrestling with the decision. And of course, the tug to have the boys just because they're just so incredibly adorable. Of course they are. But then I still have probably five good years in me before i will need to continue to retire and then get the freedom of being able to travel back and forth but um i may be looking at this more of an economic decision as opposed to a personal decision so the regret part of it probably hasn't come into our thought process yet but that's a great question

well it's something you can think about and i I'll tell you, there are some calls on this show where it is like, yes, you absolutely should do this. This is a strictly financial, this is right, this is wrong. This is one of those where it's more of a values decision. We're not going to be mad at you if you decide to stay in Atlanta and pay more because you want to be close to your grandkids, and we're not going to be mad if you decide to move. This is your life, Jerry. And it ultimately comes down to you and your wife's decision.

I will tell you what I hear as the mother of three kids age six, four, and one. My mother-in-law and father-in-law are actually stopping by the show here in a little bit today. And they live in Florence, Alabama, which is two hours from Nashville where we live. They see them about once a month, definitely sometimes more frequently than that, but at the least once a month, once every three weeks. And every time they see them,

they say, oh, they've grown up. Oh my gosh, they've changed so much. Oh my gosh, so much has happened in three weeks. And so I hear that. So I can't separate myself from that totally when I advise you, Jerry, because to me, family's everything. That's my personal values. Family's everything. There's no amount of money in the world that would make me want to be away from my mom, from my in-laws, from my dad.

But that's me. You know, everyone doesn't have those same family ties. Everyone doesn't have that same family pool. But you can think about it you can think about which which one you will regret because ultimately i want to advise you in the direction of no regrets and i will encourage one other alternative here sometimes we tend to think of things as these extremes like i've got this extreme option or this extreme option i just want to challenge you is there an option you. Is there an option in between? Is there an option in Atlanta where you could downsize in your house or find something more on the outskirts of town or something that's a little bit cheaper that helps you make progress on your financial goals if you want to, to pay a

little less, but you're still close to your family? So I want to throw that out there as an option as well. George, you hop in here. Yeah. Here's my take. My family is in Boston, Massachusetts. My wife's family, they're moving to Florida. And we don't have kids yet, and we're going, man, when we have kids, it's going to be kind of sad to not have the grandparents so close by. So if I'm you guys, I'm like, hey, they're going to be this age for a little while.

In 10 years, they're going to be in high school and going to college, and they'll kind of be doing their own thing. So to me, I'm like, can you hang out in that area for maybe another 10 years as they grow up and you get to be with them way more frequently. And then once you guys are, you know, in maybe 70, 75, you can go retire, uh, back to your, your hometown and retire there and have a great life and you can pay for those trips. Yeah. You know, one of the things that, um, that my mother-in-law said to me, Jerry, in relation to my kids,

she said, you know, there's a very short time frame when they want to go to Mimi and Pop's. My son's today at school. Mimi and Pop went and picked him up from school. And Carter is in first grade and Conley's in pre-K-5. And they are so excited they can't see Street because they get to go to Mimi and Pop's today. And Mimi and Pop are picking him up from school. Like today is basically the greatest day in the world and Mimi and Pop are picking them up from school like today is basically the greatest day in the world because Mimi and Pop are picking them up from school and my mother-in-law very wisely pointed

out to me she said there's only a short frame of time where they feel like that when they're 17 they're not going Mimi and Pop's they're probably not wanting to go to Mimi and Pop's if we're honest they don't they won't like us either when they're 17 so we all know that time is coming but in this season Jerry I think that that might be something to consider because this is a really special time. And to your point, you've got five more years before you retire anyway. It's not that you can't move back out there. They just walked in. My little ones just walked in. How perfect is that? I know. I was just talking about them. It's not that you can't move out there, but maybe just put it off like George said. So you get to cherish these sacred years when they're little.

They're only little once, but you got this. Thanks for calling, Jerry. This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you. homeschool parents we get it preparing your teen for the real world can feel scary especially when it comes to teaching them complicated money topics like compound interest, taxes, and insurance. But you can do it, and our homeschool curriculum can help. Foundations in Personal Finance has helped over 5 million students learn the money lessons they need to thrive now and in the future. How incredible is that? And the best part, gone are the late nights of lesson planning. This curriculum already has activities, videos,

lesson plans, and assessments already done for you. Video content and activities already created. Parents, text HOMESCHOOL to 33789 to learn more about our life-changing personal finance curriculum for middle and high school students. I'm Christy Wright and joining me today is my good friend George Camel. We are here for you. Give us a call 888-825-5225. If you've got a question about money, time management, business leadership, whatever you need, we are here for you. It's 888-825-5225. And we're going to go to Scottsdale, Arizona with Alexis. Hey, Alexis, how are you? Good. How are you?

Good. What's going on? Good. So I just had a question. I'm 20 and I have $56,000 in the bank account, which is growing every day. However, I have absolutely no idea what to do with this money as it's in the account, but it's not making any interest. Well, what a great problem to have. I've got $56,000. I don't know what to do. Christy and George, help me. Where did this come from? I'm just curious. Let's start there. So I actually own a furniture company where I buy thrifted furniture and I flip it on Instagram. Cool.

I love this, Alexis. How long have you been doing it? I've been doing it for about three months now. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Alexis, you've been doing this three months and you've made 56,,000 off of this? So the $56,000 isn't just from that. Previous to owning the furniture business, I've also owned a few other businesses, but I had stopped doing that within the last three months. Okay. And so now it's just the furniture business that I'm doing. Super cool. Okay. Do you have any debt? Um, I only have my car debt. How much is that? Um, so right now I have it leased and my grandparents pay half of it. So

my monthly payment is $200 a month and that's the only debt I have. What is the car worth? I want to say $53,000. The car? I just got it. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Any other debt? Nope, that's it. Okay.

George, I'm going to let you take the debt part of this, and then we'll talk about the emergency fund and kind of going from there. Yeah, so what is your income? So my income is around maybe like it ranges from $8,000 to $10,000 a month. Awesome. You're rocking it, Alexis. 20 years old. Yeah.

There's a lot of good things happening here. Yeah. So here's what I want you to do. I want to get this debt out of your life because you have too many good things to let this be holding you back. I don't like leases. It is one of the most expensive ways to operate a vehicle. And with your income and your hustle, you can go pay cash for a car. And your savings.

And your savings. So talking about the savings, there's a lot we can do with that. You said you're new to the plan here? Yeah, so I've never done any plans before. Well, you've done really well for no plans. I know, that's amazing. Let's start with that, Alexis. So we teach the seven baby steps here at Ramsey Solutions, and we've taken calls during this show where people want to leapfrog, they want to do it their own way, and that's fine, but you're not

going to get the results that you want doing that. And so here's what I want you to do. We start with a Baby Step 1 starter emergency fund of $1,000. So everything but that, we're going to go and pay off the debt with that in Baby Step 2. So we're going to pay off all of our debts from smallest to largest. You just have the car from what you told me. And so you're going to want to get the full buyout amount from the dealership or wherever you're leasing it from. And you could pay that in full and get rid of this thing today. So I do like that. That's great news. And then with the money left over, you can get a good used car for now. I mean, you're going to be in a really good spot soon. Once you pay off that car and you get a fully funded emergency fund and baby step three,

that's going to be three to six months of expenses. So that's not three to six months of income. That's three to six months of expenses. And once you do that, I want you to start investing 15% of your income into retirement. You're 20 years old. So you've got a good 40, 50 years to invest. You're going to be a multimillionaire without question. So I want you to know that you're in a great spot. But I do want you to get rid of that lease as soon as possible, so that all of this amazing income coming from this business can help you get through the baby steps and help you accomplish your goals. The other thing, Alexis, and I'm not against nice cars at all, but you don't need a car that expensive on your income. That's way too much car for your income. You're doing well,

but that's just too much car. That's just crazy too much car. So we're going to get rid of that. Get something more reasonable. You can pay for it in cash. You'll get your emergency fund going. Stay on the line. We will give you the total money makeover, which is basically, this is a quick read, Alexis. I read it in two hours, but it walks you through our baby steps in detail. And it's going to really dive into baby step one, why you need $1,000 set aside baby step two, why we don't want debt, baby step three, why we need three to six months of expenses. And it even talks about why leasing a car is the most expensive way to own a car just so you really get that in your head and your heart of why we're telling you to do this. And you're going to go about this a different way with having a car you pay for in cash. That is a smaller

percentage of your annual income than what you've got right now. You've really done fantastic. And as a matter of fact, in addition to Total Money Makeover, you are a businesswoman. And so I'll have Kelly give you a ticket to our Business Boutique Conference. It's coming up October 14th through the 16th. You can join us here in Nashville. Alexis, if you want to, if not, you can join us on live stream. And that will just give you even more motivation to build this business. You have done so well with no plan. I'm kind of amazed at how well you've done with no plan. But you need a plan for your money. And you need to plan for your business. And when you have that, you are going to be unstoppable woman, like you're going to be unstoppable. When you start

having some intentionality, some focus, some boundaries around what your goals are and what you're trying to do, you're going to be incredible. You know, one of the things I think that is hard, George, is sometimes what makes us successful, being scrappy, flying by the seat of our pants, can be the actual thing that holds us back to get to the next level. And that's true in money. It's definitely true in business. I see this so much with women that I work with in business where they are super scrappy when they start out, but then they just stay scrappy and at a point where they cannot grow and scale because they aren't willing to get a little more sophisticated. They're not willing to get systems and processes and procedures and plans and all that in place

that you need to grow, that you need to scale. And I think that that's one of the things I love about the baby steps is it is so simple, tactical, and straightforward of you do this first, you do the second, you do this third, and so on. And I know you teach people, you're so great at breaking things down to very actionable steps because the truth is when you can see it, you can do it. When you have a plan and you know the steps, you can follow them.

Yeah, it doesn't have to be complicated. And I think with all the voices out there, people kind of start to get muddy. And you go, I don't know what to do. So I'm just going to kind of do my own thing without really much of a plan. And Alexis has done really well without that. But once she has this plan, I'm scared. I mean, nothing's going to stop her. 20 years old, she's crushing it in business.

And I hope she can at least attend the Business Boutique live stream because I'm a huge fan of Business Boutique. You are. I've been to many of these events. Back in the day, you marketed this event. People don't know that. No, I was on the Business Boutique team and I was a card carrying member. And let me tell you, the estrogen in that room, I got fired up.

I was like, maybe I need to start a business. I don't know, Christy. I'm starting to have thoughts. So I just love this event, and I love how you are empowering so many women to take control, not only of their money, but of their business and entrepreneurial life, and giving them that amazing steps, that forward-thinking purpose to go, you know what? What got me here is not going to get me there.

Well, I don't care who you are, and I don't care how successful you are in business by making it up as you go. Everyone will be more successful if they have a plan. Everyone will make more progress financially if you have a budget. Everyone will make more progress in any area of your life, whether it's your marriage, with your parenting, with your business, your money, it doesn't matter. You're going to go further faster when you have a plan. Zig Ziglar says, if you aim for nothing, you will hit it every time. We want you to aim for something. We want you to know what your finish line is

so that you can cross it. This is The Ramsey Show. so so Our scripture of the day is Ecclesiastes 3, 1 and 2. There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens. A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, No change of circumstances can repair a defect of character. Well, that's the truth.

You know, I love Ecclesiastes, George. I actually talk about this in my book because I think that we don't talk about seasons enough, the seasons of life, and how the season that we're in will often determine what's important to us, what matters to us. So what we spend our time on

will look different in one season versus another. What our version of life balance will look different in one season versus another. For some of you all that are in baby step two right now, you're gazelle intense, you're hustling, you're sacrificing beans and rice, drinks and beans. That's right right now. I just want to say that again. That's right right now. When you do the right things at the right time, you will feel that sense of balance that you've been looking for. But it's not because you're doing everything all the time. It's because you're doing the right things and giving

yourself permission to focus on them when they're right. And then when you're in baby step three or baby step seven, what's right looks a lot different. And that is a good thing. So I actually talk about that in my book, Take Back Your Time. Doing the right things at the right time will lead to that sense of balance you've been looking for and uh and it's just it that comes the heart of that comes from ecclesiastes

there's a time for everything when you realize that because you realize this isn't forever this is a right now and this thing doesn't define me yes this season that i'm in this isn't going to be my new life and it kind of makes you go, oh, I don't need to have that FOMO anymore because right now this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Yes. And next week I might be doing this over here and you're in that season now with this new book.

Yes. And it's so interesting too because we were just telling you guys earlier, if you buy a copy of Take Back Your Time today, you get a copy of my devotional free, an e-copy of my devotional. But I talk about this idea of seasons in the devotional. And one of the things that I've noticed in my life, George, is if I'm not careful,

I can look around me to the season that I'm in and draw conclusions about my identity based on my season. So let me give you an example. My house isn't always as clean as I would like it to be. I have three kids under age six. No matter how much I clean, they're faster and messing up. But if I'm not careful, I'll look around me and I go, oh, my house is a mess. I'm a mess. No, no, no, no, no. I have little kids that make a mess. Nothing personal.

Carter and Conley who are in the lobby right now. I am not a mess. I have little kids that make a mess. I am not a mess. And so there's something powerful in separating yourself from your season. But we do need to consider it because it's going to affect what our version of balance looks like. It's going to affect what we need to and want to spend our time on. And that changes our perspective when we set our priorities when we consider our season. So it's a great verse. I love Ecclesiastes 3. All right, let's go to Seattle, Washington with Nancy. Hey, Nancy,

how are you? I'm all right. I wish Ken Coleman was there too you guys were a threesome I'm going to tell him that because Ken Coleman was with me last week and someone called Nancy someone called Elmer called and he said I wish it was Dave and I was like man we don't have the right people on the right days

Ken's going to be so happy that he was wanted though Nancy I'm going to tell him yeah no but I'm glad that both of you are there. But I feel like I have lost my mojo at work, and I'm like about 308 days until I retire, and it's just kind of like the last couple of years has just been really bad with work in terms of the pandemic. We've had lots of staff ill. We've had a lot of patients ill. We've had short staffing. We've had to change on a dime

notice to do things differently. I'm just burned out and it's just kind of like all I can think about is I want to get out of here. Yeah. What do you do? I work with psychiatric patients. Okay. And so it's really a tough clientele to work with and it's inpatient setting and it's just been really really really really tough and it's just kind of like you know and I'm always worked I've loved

to work my whole career I've been doing it for a long time and I and I've always really been able to attend to detail with work in terms of all the, you know, charting and assessments and anything and everything, all the details, I've always been on top of everything. And I just kind of like, you know, I don't care two cents at this. There's times when I don't care two cents about it. So it's just kind of like, I feel like I'm putting my time in. Yeah.

Well, I hear that. I hear it in your voice, and it's clear from your perspective of your experience with this. But let me ask you this. Are you going to stay with it until you retire? Well, I could quit and have no income until I have to be 62 to draw retirement. Or I could work until I'm 62 and then get my pension. Or I could go and get another job elsewhere. I mean, believe me, I've thought about it. And, in fact, I've been hit about 14 months ago. I got headhunted by another facility in the region, and I got an interview set up.

And, I mean, they found me on LinkedIn and I got this close to going through with it and decided you know what I transferred I transferred to this other facility in this other system I go from being top of the heap in terms of seniority to bottom of the heap, and this was still deep in the throes of the pandemic, and we got hit, our state got hit really bad with COVID in, you know, the March through mid-summer-ish with that big wave last year. And I transfer facilities in June, and I could, you know, be the first one cut if that new place, you know, hired me. So I pulled myself out of the job interview. Yeah.

And I didn't go through with it because I figured, you know, I'm going to stay where I'm at, and I'm hiring seniority at the place where I'm working. And so, I mean, I've thought about that. I thought you might suggest that. Well, no, no, no. The reason I wanted to ask is because if you've made up your mind to leave, then that's different than if you've made up your mind to stay and you're just asking how to stay motivated while staying. Well, basically, you know, kind of the decision I've come at is I'm going to stay until I'm 62 and then exit stage left afterwards.

So it's just basically getting myself to that end point in, you know, 308 days. Yeah. Okay. So, Nancy, that's the reason i wanted to boil it down to that of like you've determined to stay because i did hear that as unhappy as you are as burned out as you are as over it as you are as counting the days as you are you're actually committed to stay and i and i agree with that you're so close to retirement if you had five years left this would be a different conversation you're so close it is it is i think it's wise to stay the financial aspect of it, but even the security aspect you're talking

about. Here's the thing that I need to, that I want to help you with, because this is really your question. Your question is not a career question. Your question is not even a financial question. It's really a motivation question. So if you've decided to stay, then you have a choice. You can stay and allow yourself to be miserable, or you can stay and make the best of it. And as cheesy as this may sound, you've got to commit to make the best of it. Because if not, then you've decided to stay and have chosen to be miserable because you're playing the victim in a choice you made. You decided to stay.

So if I were you and I was going to decide to stay, I would just make the absolute best of it. That means thinking about everything you're grateful for, thinking about everything that you love about it, think about everything that's positive, making sure you're getting filled up by podcasts, teachers, things that bring you joy, things that give you energy outside, whether that's a pastor or a scripture or a church. If you'll stay on the line, I'll have Kelly send you a copy of my devotional to just encourage you in this season. Just like we were just saying, George, your season is where you are, not who you are. You're in a tough season, but it doesn't mean that you're a

failure. You're ending this on a bad note. You're burnout. No, no, no. You're in a tough season and you're going to make the best of it while you're there. And Nancy, I believe if you do everything you can to fill yourself up while you're there, the less you can talk about how bad it is and the more you can focus on how good it is, it will actually change your experience of it. It's not cheesy. It's psychology.

And it works. Act the way you want to feel and the feelings will follow. Watch how that makes a difference. I hope that helps. George, great job today. Thanks for hanging out. I want to thank our producer, Ben Hill, associate producer, Kelly Daniel, and you, America, for listening in.

This is The Ramsey Show. This is James Childs, a producer of The Ramsey Show. You can listen to all our shows with the Ramsey Network app on your smartphone. Browse by topic or even sing clips to your friends. Download the Ramsey Network app in your favorite app store today.