The Ramsey Show - App - My Husband Refuses To Combine Our Finances (Hour 1)
Episode Date: September 8, 2021Debt, Investing, Relationships, Career Sign Up for a FREE trial of Ramsey+ TODAY: https://bit.ly/3rZTUAx Tools to get you started: Debt Calculator: https://bit.ly/2Q64HME Insurance Coverag...e Checkup: https://bit.ly/3sXwUn5 Complete Guide to Budgeting: https://bit.ly/3utmVXi Check out more Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3fHhbVE
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Live Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions,
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it's the Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king,
and the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW
as the status symbol of choice.
I'm Dave Ramsey, your host, George Camel.
Ramsey Personality is my co-host today as we answer your questions about your life and
your money.
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Well, we had a huge event here at Ramsey this morning.
Our entire team of 1,000 folks sat here, and we watched the entire premiere screening of the new documentary that comes out in October called Borrowed Future.
And we're all a little biased in this building, but it's incredible.
Yeah, you don't have to trust us, but let me tell you, we had the red carpet.
We had Chick-fil-A biscuits.
The team was just on fire because we've been teasing this thing for a long time the team has been working on this for a long time and we finally got to show
the crew what that's what it's all about and there was not a dry eye in the house yeah it is a world
class storytelling world class production values and editing and the whole process and so you'll
be able to see borrowed future on october 14thth. 14th is the release date on Apple TV and
Amazon Prime and all the places, Hulu, all the places that you watch
good documentaries show up and good things like this
show up. So you'll be able to find us. We'll be out there just about everywhere.
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to BorrowedFuture.com and just put your email in there.
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And so we'd love to have you sign up and take a look at the thing.
It is absolutely incredible.
It is obviously about the epic failure of the student loan movement industry.
Congress, how they have screwed you.
Navient, Sally Mae.
When you finish watching this, your blood will be boiling.
Because we have tacked it down in detail.
And there's going to be some people really, really unhappy when this comes out.
And it's not going to be you.
It's going to be these people that have been screwing you for decades with this epic failure of a program.
It makes everyone involved.
I mean, there's so many villains, it's hard to be there.
It's hard to pinpoint one.
But, yeah, there's no way you can have an opinion after watching this thing where you don't go,
this situation is screwed up, and I don't want anyone I know a part of the student loan crisis.
Yeah.
Amen.
Amen.
And if you've got student loans, we're here to help you with that, too.
We're not mad at you.
We've all done stupid things around here.
That's how we all got started.
We discovered our lack of perfection.
And once we figured that out, then we were able to share.
Much easier.
I've been there.
Where we had messed up.
And so been there, done that, got the T-shirt.
It's like my pastor says, a man with an experience is not at the mercy of a man with an opinion.
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Ann is with us in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
Hi, Ann.
How are you?
Hi, Dave.
God bless you.
You too.
How can we help?
Thank you so much.
I'm making $1,500 a month on Social Security,
and I make another $500 a month substitute teaching
and
I'm paying my sister
$500 a month
to pay her back the $20,000
I owe her
and that will take me
three years but in the
meantime I'm not
tithing at all
and I don't quite know what to do about that.
How old are you?
72.
Okay.
All right.
Well, I think it's always good when we're talking about tithing to pull back from the details of the situation
and just unpack, okay, yes, those of us that are Christians,
the vast majority of us believe that the Bible says to tithe,
to give a tenth of our income to our local church.
That's the definition of the word from an evangelical Christian standpoint,
and that's what you're calling about.
So let's pan back from that then and say, okay, what is God doing with this tithe thing why is he teaching us to tithe
and then what are some of the details around it number one um he is not teaching us to tithe
because he needs money he's god he doesn't need money okay number two he's not teaching us to
tithe because the local church needs our support although that is one of the byproducts of the tithe.
But that's not why Scripture teaches us to tithe.
Your Heavenly Father, who is absolutely crazy about you, and he loves you, little girl,
teaches you to give because it's good for you.
It changes you.
And that's the reason generosity always makes all of us smile.
Generosity always makes our eyes leak, right?
And so this is not a rule to be kept by an angry father.
This is a loving father that says,
Hey, little girl, best way to live your life is to be generous.
And here's a good rule of thumb, a tenth of your income.
Now, if we want to get technical about the income, let's get technical about it.
I'll give you an opinion, but I want you to live in a lot of grace around this.
God does not love tithers more than non-tithers.
You don't get brownie points with God for tithing.
That's not why you do it the reason you do it is it's good for you to learn what it does to your heart when you're generous and that's why giving
is good for everyone that's jesus says better to give than receive and the reason is what happens
inside of you not because you're more noble or more altruistic or you're a better person because
you're a giver rather than a taker.
No, it has everything to do with your heart.
So now that we've established that there's a lot of grace around the subject,
then the technicality is the best indicator we have is in Deuteronomy.
It says to tithe on your net increase.
Now, that would be if you are earning a wage, which you said you're earning $500.
Okay?
Right?
Right.
Social Security, we could argue, is not earning.
You paid into it.
It's a horrible retirement plan that you paid way more into it than you'll ever get out.
Right.
And so I'm not sure I consider that income.
You can if you want, because if you want to be a bigger giver, it's never a bad thing.
But in my mind, with what you described, what you owe your sister has nothing to do with
the equation mathematically.
I would be tithing on the $500 worth of income, and then I would pray and ask God if you think
you're supposed to tithe on the other Social Security income.
So $50.
And I think you can probably pull that off even in your really, really tight budget.
Yeah, absolutely.
I mean, $50 from your income, and I don't know your expenses, Ann, when it comes down to the budget,
but I would take a good look at the budget and see if we can fine-tune some things
because clearly giving is something that you're passionate about.
It's something that you want to do, and I love your heart and faithfulness around this.
And so I think you look at the budget and go, I know I don't have a lot coming in,
but what are some areas I can shave to make this $50 happen so that I can be generous?
I don't think you're $50 off even in your tight budget one way or the other.
But again, you continue to pray about this,
and I want you to have a peace about it.
I want everyone in your generosity to walk in grace.
But the principle is there.
Those that win with money are generous.
Very few people do we find in all of our data points
that are very good with money unless they're generous.
That's the little secret that nobody talks about much or enough.
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Brent is with us in Sacramento.
Hi, Brent.
Welcome to the Ramsey Show.
Hi, Dave.
Hi, George.
Thank you guys so much for taking my call.
Sure.
What's up?
Yeah, I have a question.
So I, like you, I'm really interested
in like real estate and kind of building up like a rental income, like portfolio. And, um, I kind
of have like a plan to try to kind of like become financially free within the next 10 or 15 years,
thanks to a pretty big income that I have. And so I was wondering if, uh, kind of like a two-part
question, if I'm kind of crazy for thinking to basically just kind of cut
back on like my 401k that I'm getting from my company to try to build this portfolio faster
to essentially like quote unquote retire off of this. And if I am crazy for that, what should it
be invested in to kind of double every year? Like you say, cause right now it's just invested in
like the standard, like the speculation for like when I'm expected to retire.
Okay. How old are you? I'm expected to retire. Okay.
How old are you?
I'm 27.
Cool.
And what do you make?
In salary, it's about $130,000, and then in RSUs, it's about anywhere between $30,000 to $50,000,
depending on, like, what the stocks are at when I sell them.
Yeah, good for you.
Well done.
That's fun.
Okay. Well, obviously, the RSUs are not available to you until they're available.
They're restricted stock units.
So what are the restrictions on them?
How quickly can you get to that money?
They're quarterly.
So like every three months or so, I get roughly like $8,000 to $10,000 in the RSUs.
That are released to you so that you can cash in correct yeah once a
quarter okay so they're not heavily restricted you don't have to hold on five years or something like
that no they were just restricted for like the first year and so i got a pretty big chunk uh
in the first year that i actually used to pay off like the remainder of my debt so thanks for
thanks for having me out with that all right cool, cool. Well, you're doing really well.
We teach a thing, a process called the Baby Steps,
and I think that is included in the person who wants to be wealthy in real estate
and makes $150,000 a year at 27 years old.
So, yeah, I would tell you to first become debt-free, are you?
Yes, I am.
Do you own a home?
No, I've been saving up, and I have about 80 grand saved right now to put into a home,
but I'm waiting for the market to kind of cool down a bit.
Okay, cool.
That's fine.
Good.
Well, and we would say I have three to six months of expenses set aside as an emergency fund
and then put as big a stroke on the house as you can put on the house.
And while you're saving for that house, you've done a good job with a good strong down payment. Sacramento is a more expensive market. You wouldn't hurt to even have more,
obviously. But we're going to put 15% of our income into retirement and into the 401k. And
above that, you should have plenty of room as a young single guy to save like a crazy man towards
buying some real estate. And I think you're on your way to doing that. I don't think it keeps you from doing that.
No, absolutely not.
I want you to have it paid for property first
before you go investing in real estate,
but I think with that income,
and it's only going up from here,
he's 27, clearly a sharp guy,
so I think, hey, can I live off of 30
and sock away 100 plus
and save that and start to invest that into property
once you've got the investing plate spinning?
I think you're going to be just fine.
You're going to be a multimillionaire either way at this rate.
Here's the thing.
You lower your risk and your oh crap moments when something comes at you is lowered risk.
The more you have paid off.
And so I'm with George.
I'm going to go ahead and buy the house and get the house paid off,
and then I'm going to save and buy my real estate.
And by the way, that's what I did.
I'm not asking you to do something I didn't do.
I got my house paid off, and I saved up and bought my very first piece of investment real estate.
And that's the hardest one, by the way way because then you got all that rent that with no
payments that's a lot of money coming in and then when you've got two of them with all that rent
and no payments the third one's even easier because you've got all that rent and no payments
and now i'm quite a few pieces of real estate into this idea and i've got all that rent and
no payments and life is pretty good in
that situation.
Yeah.
I follow a lot of these influencers on social media, and they're in the real estate world,
and so they're trying to leverage out their eyeballs, and they go, well, I'm not even
going to have my own place.
I'm just going to rent, and I'm going to keep getting more and more mortgages because, hey,
they're paying my mortgage off for me, Dave.
How is that a dumb idea?
It's about as dumb as following the advice
of an influencer on Instagram. You were the original influencer. You were doing it.
Well, maybe. I don't know if I ever qualified for that stuff. But I started buying real estate
the first time when I went broke in my 20s, much like Brent.
I was a little bit younger than Brent, actually.
And there was a rage going on then like is going on now, and that's 40 years ago.
And the rage was Nothing Down Real Estate.
As a matter of fact, there was a guy who wrote a book called Nothing Down.
That was the name of the book.
He later filed Chapter 11.
No book on that. And lost everything.
And I was in a real estate club with all these guys that were following,
plus or minus, those strategies.
You know, highly leveraged, lots of debt, buy as much real estate as you can buy.
It'll all work out.
The renters will pay your payments.
And the interesting thing is, you know, it felt good at the at the moment because like i became a millionaire by the time i was 26
doing that and i i owned a bunch of real estate i owned four million dollars worth of real estate
and i had three million dollars worth of debt that means you're a millionaire four minus three right
and so um but i also had no money no money it all went back into deals i had no money, no money. It all went back into deals. I had no money. It all went back into deals.
And as soon as the bank just flinched, they just took me out in a tsunami, just knocked me over
because I'd built a house of cards and a house of cards isn't stable. But back to my story,
all of my buddies, there were three guys that were kind of old farts in the club right the club was like 100 people
this real estate investors club and these old guys wouldn't do it the cool way they were paying for
everything or they had almost no debt they'd maybe borrow a little bit but it was like a
they put down like 70 percent or something mostly cash deals and uh i remember talking about i'm like dude you could
do three times as many deals and he goes yeah but i'll be here three times as long oh 10 years from
the time i'm in that club later i don't know a single person in that club that had not gone broke
wow every one of them that followed these influencers you're talking about's type advice,
including the guy who wrote the freaking book, had gone through bankruptcy.
Wow.
And so, you know, it's just, it's fool's gold because the leverage will come back
and bite your butt off, and you'll just be standing there.
And it wasn't just me.
I'm not pregnant.
I mean, it wasn't different because it was Dave.
Well, Dave's just wounded because of his experience.
No, Dave learned from his experience.
There's a difference.
There's a difference between being wounded and learning.
You know, that hot stove burnt my hand when I laid my hand on it.
And so I don't touch hot stoves anymore.
So strange.
Yeah.
Well, I love to see people this young in their 20s wanting to do it and wanting to do it
the right way.
So I think Brent's on to something here.
If he can follow the baby steps and do it with cash, he's going to be doing just fine.
But all of his buddies that are on Instagram are going to be really, really concerned about
how slow he's moving.
Oh, yeah.
And the people who build wealth and keep it are never on the cover of Fast Company magazine.
They're on the cover of Slow Company magazine.
The tortoise never makes it to the cover, Dave.
What's going on?
The tortoise, the hair is always on the cover.
The tortoise never makes it.
And every time I read the book, the tortoise wins the race.
This is The Ramsey personality is my co-host today.
He is the host of The Fine Print, our latest podcast that has gone out.
It is in season one.
There are ten episodes that if you watch this, you will find all the different ways that you should have read the fine print,
and someone's taking advantage of you. Oh, yeah. And our latest one is all about
these buy now, pay later services. And you've probably heard the names Afterpay and Klarna
and Affirm. And Dave, I've been digging into this, and their marketing is hilarious. Here's
what they... They sell themselves to companies by saying this, we create financial freedom for
your customers. That sounds like something... We want to create financial freedom for your customers. That sounds like something we want to create financial freedom for people.
And the way they create financial freedom for customers is by putting them in debt.
That makes sense.
Right?
You don't have to read the fine print to understand that this is a stupid idea.
And this is just modern-day layaway.
Back in the day, you go to the store.
Yeah, but layaway doesn't have an interest rate.
No.
And you have to wait to get the item until you actually pay for it in full.
Yeah.
With buy now, pay later, you get it now.
This is the payday lender of Amazon Prime.
Yes.
That's what these guys are.
I mean, if you have to make payments on a shirt, hint, you shouldn't be buying the shirt.
Yeah.
Oh, my gosh.
Do we need your grandmother to remind you of something like this
and box your little ears america oh my gosh this is huge among gen z and millennials because what
they do is they go well it's why spend 100 i could spend 25 and free up that money in my budget yeah
i get to use all this i get to keep my money now this is the greatest it's the you know i was
thumbing through uh we're moving and so i was packing, and I found the newspaper from the 1970s when Nixon resigned.
And it was the Nashville Tennessean, which the newspaper is actually still in existence.
It's no longer a paper.
It's now a pamphlet, a left-wing rag.
But the, and it's really about five pages now, but it used to be a legitimate thick.
Mostly ads now.
But people used to, but I mean, I'm going through this thing, looking at the cars for
sale of the 1970s and what they cost, and looking at the houses.
I was looking at the, there used to be these things people called the classified ads.
And you could put your lawnmower for sale in the classified ads, and you could sell
your, you know, your dog in the classified ads, and you could sell your dog in the classified ads,
and you could do whatever in the classified,
because they were set up by classification.
Oh.
This is old school Craigslist.
This is the next.
It was Craigslist before Craig was born.
And so I'm going through this thing,
and I was amazed that the language is the same.
Three easy payments. Fifteen the same. Three easy payments.
Fifteen easy.
Just make easy payments.
So easy.
And I was remembering my grandfather going, there's no such thing, honey.
There are no easy payments.
They always hurt.
Yeah.
What's easy is the purchase of something that you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you don't even really like.
That's what's easy.
The payments are never easy.
Even if they're small, they at least remind you how stupid you were that you bought a
shirt.
It was a shirt!
Oh, my gosh.
It's crazy.
And what's even crazier is Klarna, they tout this to companies.
The store order increases by 45% when you use Klarna.
They don't put that in front of the customer.
They put that in front of the company.
Well, they didn't even spend their money on the name.
I mean, what a horrible name.
I know.
Klarna?
It sounds like karma.
Karma gone sideways.
Yeah.
It's bad.
That'd be a better tagline.
So we dig into this.
It's 24 minutes long.
It's fun.
It's narrative.
Rachel Cruz joins me as the expert on the topic.
She's dug into this.
We talked to a real life person. That's the one that launched joins me as the expert on the topic. She's dug into this.
We talked to a real-life person. That's the one that launched this week.
Yes, this launched just last week.
And this girl spent $10,000 at Lululemon using Buy Now, Pay Later.
My brain melted down when I heard that.
And that's only buying two things from Lululemon.
Imagine that.
Sweatpants are extraordinary.
That's all it takes.
And so we dig into this.
We talk to a lot of people.
We get a home mortgage for freaking Lululemon.
It's unbelievable.
Yeah.
You just can't.
George will always have a job.
That's true.
Open phones at 888-825-5225.
Check it out.
It's called The Fine Print.
Anywhere great podcasts are sold.
Oh, wait.
They're free.
How is this free?
Check it out.
Check it out.
I don't know because I'm paying you.
I'm not sure how this is working.
Don't think about it too long. Somewhere in there. My brain's hurting. All right. Caitlin is with us in Minnesota. Check it out. I don't know, because I'm paying you. I'm not sure how this is working. Don't think about it too long.
Somewhere in there.
My brain's hurting.
All right.
Caitlin is with us in Minnesota.
Hi, Caitlin.
What's up in your world?
Hi, Dave.
It's an honor to talk to you.
You too.
So me and my husband have been married for about four years.
Sorry, I'm really nervous.
That's okay.
We've never lost a patient.
You'll be okay um and we operate by what i call the roommate method um it's where you know we have a mortgage
payment i give him my half he pays the bill right and i know we want to do the dave ramsey we want
to do all your baby steps we've already already got our $1,000 emergency fund.
But he wants to take care of his debt, and he wants me to take care of my debt.
And I tried to talk to him, and I don't know what to say, what to do, how to.
We've been to, like, the Money and Marriage Seminar last year.
We've done Financial Peace University together.
So you've flunked everything of all of it i'm gonna make you repeat the second grade here it hurts my heart a lot because i love him and i know that if we can get through this
you know and get through our get this, that things will be great.
I don't know if I'm not saying the right thing.
How old is he?
He is, we're both 28.
Okay, I thought you married a child for a second.
I just wanted to get the ages right before we dug in here.
No, oh my gosh, you guys, please stop saying that about him.
I'm sure he's a great husband.
What it feels like is he's saying
these are my toys and these are your toys
and I'll play with my toys and you play with your toys.
But when you guys said I do,
it was we from then on out.
There's no roommate method. It's
husband and wife method. And that means joint
accounts. That means conversation,
communication, combining everything.
And it's now our debt.
But you're saying he's not on board with that.
Can I throw something in there, too?
And I don't totally blame him because I've been there.
I don't blame him.
What's his excuse?
No.
What's his excuse?
Well, he hasn't given me an excuse.
So he just whines.
No, he doesn't whine.
Yeah, he is.
We don't talk about it a lot.
Yeah.
His wife is calling me on national radio after you've been through financial
peace university and been to the thing.
So yeah,
that's called.
Yeah.
No,
really,
this is,
this is,
this is bad.
So,
um,
okay.
So what you've got to do with him is you're going to have to get to the
bottom of what his problem is.
What's his objection.
Why does he,
why does he not want to combine after four years?
Why do we not, years why are we not
French we we
it's we when you're married it's we
not yours and mine
we're not splitting the mayonnaise the bologna and the other
stuff in the refrigerator that's my mustard keep your hands
off of it we're not roommates
yeah
and it's not good for your marriage and it's not good for your
wealth building it's not good for your relationships
it's not good for your level of communication there's nothing here that's good
so why is he insistent upon doing things that are not good i'm confused you are too so maybe he needs
to maybe he needs to defend himself on that yeah well and i kind of i've been the free spirit i've
never been good at handling my money but i want us to do it together
so we can learn together you know yeah i mean if you two laid out a plan that both of you agreed
to called a monthly budget would you stick to it if you had a vote on the plan oh gosh yeah if he
well then the free spirit is not the problem yeah but a free spirit's not the problem because even
a free spirit can stick to a plan.
Yeah.
If they have a vote and a voice in the plan.
Now, he doesn't get to lay out the plan and then make you do it.
That's not what we're talking about. No, and he wouldn't because we've tried before, and I don't know what happened, to be honest.
But we've tried before to do a budget.
Do you guys have a why that you've laid out when you talk,
or does he just not want to talk?
Does he just shut down?
No, we've talked.
We've done the whole dreaming thing.
We want to build wealth.
We both want to change our generation.
We want to have a good legacy.
Are you sure it's a good legacy for him are you sure
legacy are you sure that's not just you we've talked we have talked about it before and he
has said it i think he carries a lot of shame with having so much like because coming into
the relationship it was his debt and i have debt debt, too. But like you said, we get married, it's ours.
For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, unto thee, all my worldly goods, I pledge.
For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, unto thee, all my worldly goods, goods i pledge this is a relationship issue
it's affecting your money and i'm getting to the bottom of it on you this is not okay George Campbell Ramsey personality is our co-host today.
Open phones at 888-825-5225.
One of the number one questions we get here on the air
and by email and on our other podcasts
is how do I get my spouse on board?
And number one,
there's not a magic formula for that.
Number two, it is absolutely necessary that you do get them on board,
because working a separate plan will eventually cause you to work a separate plan. The number
of people who build wealth and have high-quality marriages 30 years into a separate plan is
approaching zero. That's your data, but I think it's right.
It's actual data.
Wow.
I mean, the 10,000 millionaires that we interviewed, the vast majority of them said,
I don't remember the number, it was in the 70, 80 percentile, that their spouse and them worked together.
So there's a high correlation between the ability to build wealth.
There's a high correlation between high-quality communication and shared values to having a high-quality marriage.
Duh!
Shocker.
Now, what's your best shot?
What's our best shot around here of getting the spouse to see that they need to be on board?
I can't make the spouse get on board, but I can help them see how important it is.
Number one, data says that you're going to have a crummy marriage
and your likelihood of building wealth is going to suck
if you're not on the same page and you're not working together,
pulling the wagon up the hill together.
Both of you have a vote.
Saver versus spender, free spirit versus nerd,
abundance versus scarcity, and you balance each
other out. And if two people just like get married, one of you is unnecessary. So it's
good that opposites attract. But how do you get the spouse to see the need? I think the biggest
piece is starting with that why and having that shared goal. If you can't get excited about the
future, why do you care about your present? Why does it even matter to get out of debt if you
feel like you like laying in your own poop? And so what we got to
do is find a why that gets us on fire a little bit. And what I like to do, some people get inspired
by the math. A lot of people haven't even done the math on what that payment would be like to
have back in their life. What could they do? What is the interest we're currently paying?
Some people need a little bit of that nerdery to go, oh my gosh, I'm paying Sally Mae 600 bucks
a month. No, we're getting rid of this thing. So once you combine the why and the math, and then you pair
it with something like Financial Peace University, or you both read the Total Money Makeover, you
need to create that shared language because then they understand. It's not just, well, Dave said,
we need to get out of debt and do the debt snowball. It becomes a, no, we decided that
our goal is to change our family tree. We decided that we have bigger goals in life than to pay Sally Mae for the next 20 years.
And once you do that, things change, behavior change, habits change, and you start to see some progress.
And then you go, oh, my gosh, we can do this.
And then every couple that stands on the stage, they go, Dave, our marriage is better.
Yeah.
What was the key to getting out of debt?
Communication, the budget.
Well, the two things that come up every time just about.
Yeah. Right there. And they almost always raise their income yeah but you can't raise your income if the one at home's whining about you working and it's just the
whole thing it were it pulls together and um it bothers me when i hear someone say hey we went
through financial peace university we went to the Marriage of Money event, we did a dream date together, we laid out some of our why, and then the spouse still
won't come to the table.
That makes me think something else is going on.
Yeah.
Because at that point, you have the information in front of you that a logical human being
says, the pride I've got that I brought the dead in,
I've got to let that down, and we've got to work together.
It's our best shot.
The shame I have because I brought in more dead than she brought in,
I've got to lay that down because it's our best shot as a couple.
And so I don't know what's going on there,
but something else is going on that's not in the equation that we're hearing that is causing that.
Because it's not a simple thing of we just don't have a shared vision.
Yeah.
Because if you can get on a shared vision, then you will come back and do the practical stuff to hit the vision.
You know, you'll dial back in and do the tactical, do the budget together, make the sacrificial decisions together, make the decision to sell one of the cars or whatever it is you've got to do to get your budding gear.
You'll do that stuff once you see where you're going and it's worth the trip.
Yeah.
But you won't do it with, thank God it's Friday, oh God, it's Monday.
And you won't do it with, I'm a victim.
And you won't do it with, the little man can't get ahead and the system's rigged, and oh my God, the whining that goes on in this culture.
The arrogance of entitlement is unbelievable.
But if you just sit out there and say, there's a thing, I can go get that thing if I'll do
the steps to get that thing, then that thing can just be financial security, financial
peace.
Yeah, and I think you're right.
There's a theme I'm seeing here with people that can't get on board,
and it's either selfishness or shame.
It's either, well, this is mine, and that's yours,
and you deal with yours, and I'll deal with mine,
or it's the shame where they go, well, this is my debt,
and I don't want you to have the burden of that,
and there is that pride you've got to suck up and go, no, we're a team now,
and I didn't sign up for a roommate.
I don't know about her, but I don't want to live with a roommate for 30 years.
I want to live with a grown adult who decided that we do things together as a family. And I think marriage counseling may be in order for them to get on the same page and dig
into the root issue here, because I don't think it's just the budget and money. I think there is
something more serious going on. Yeah, and it scares me what it could be. Melanie is with us
in Indianapolis. Hi, Melanieanie welcome to the ramsey show
hi thanks for taking my call sure what's up um i'm actually calling just i'm trying to narrow
down the question but it's how do i go about making an income when i'm transitioning from
working full-time to being a full-time mom.
When did you have your baby?
In April, so she was five months old.
Wonderful.
How fun.
How fun.
We had our little grandson down at the lake house this weekend.
He's two months old, and they're fun when they're that age.
They don't really cause much trouble except a dirty diaper.
And that's it. So, yeah, that that's awesome so you want to work or not well i guess i'm trying to figure out if i'm even
approaching this right my husband makes about 40 000 a year 45 000 a year um but last year he was
a little bit off because most of his commission comes from, he's a salesman at a music store.
And so most of his commission is rentals for schools.
Yeah.
So with COVID, we were down a little bit.
And so we just built up a little bit more debt than we really wanted to.
So do you want to work or not?
I think I do.
I want to contribute in some way.
Are you going to start a small business and do it from home while baby is taking a nap,
or are you going back into the workplace?
I'm wanting to do something at home, something I can pretty much do online.
Okay, good.
Okay, so that you're there with baby and you work around baby
and you kind of control your own time frames.
Yeah.
Okay, but if you could add $10,000 to this equation in a year, you would feel good.
Yeah, if I could add about $10,000 to $20,000.
Okay, cool.
Well, that's realistic.
We just need to define what it is you want to go after.
It sounds to me like you are a Christy Wright business boutique customer.
Her material, Business Boutique, Equipping Women to Make Money Doing What They Love,
has a lot of ladies who want to stay at home but earn an income from home while watching over the kiddos and a lot of them have online
businesses or freelance businesses or different things where they control the time frames
uh and so that you know while the kids are at school while the kids are napping whatever it is
five o'clock in the morning before they get up you do some work and you create some income and
christy can show you how to do that i'll send send you a copy of the book, Business Boutique. It is a number one bestseller.
And if you'd like to come to Nashville, we have a three-day event in October.
And it's Christy and me and John Deloney and a bunch of high-powered ladies on the stage teaching women how to run a business.
And it is absolutely incredible.
And I'll give you a couple tickets to that as well
and bring a friend with you.
So it's Business Boutique in Nashville
and I'll send you the book and that
because here's what you're going to have to do.
You're going to flesh out the whole process
of figuring out what skills you have
and how to make money with those skills
on a limited, controlled schedule.
Yeah, I want to throw one more thing in.
Kelly will pick up. I want to give you Ken Coleman's
career assessment to help you figure out
because it sounds like you're not really sure what you want to do yet.
So going through that will give you that
clarity to figure out something you actually enjoy doing.
That's a big key.
The career assessment is pretty incredible.
So yeah, you can take that. We'll give
that to you as a gift as well.
All for the birthing of the baby. That's awesome.
This is the Ramsey Show. We'll give that to you as a gift as well. All for the birthing of the baby. That's awesome.
This is The Ramsey Show.
Dave here.
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