The Ramsey Show - App - My Promotion Has Made Me Miserable (Hour 2)

Episode Date: October 16, 2020

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studio, this is the Dave Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life, your money, your career, your mental health, your relationships. My name is Anthony O'Neill, and co-hosting with me today is the one and only Ken Coleman, number one national bestselling author and the host of the number one career show in the United States of America, Canada, Hawaii, in the world, actually, the Ken Coleman Show. And so I'm excited just to be joining him today as we co-host together. I believe the number one talk show in the world the day ramsey show 888-825-5225 888-825-5225 is the number to call in um and uh as a matter of fact ken you know we have a lot of people every single day when we get on the show um they log on to youtube and they watch us live on the day ramsey show live network and they're watching

us right now hey YouTube and I just love them I'm on here now Ken talking to him Matthew just called in Thomas Desmond Laura and so it's about 1600 people on here watching us live right now and every single day when Dave is on, one of the personalities are on, we go live. And we love reading the comments and chatting with them. And so if you definitely want to, if you're at work

and you just want to pull up the show and see some of our facial expressions, see the nice sweater that I have on or a nice sweater that King Coleman is always wearing, log on to YouTube and check this out. I do enjoy sweater weather. I'm very excited about

any time that you can put a sweater on. Sweater weather is year-round at Ramsey Solutions. Dave likes it cold. Sometimes people like behind the scenes. It doesn't matter when it happens. It's chilly in this office. It's always chilly. I wish they could see Kelly's face behind the screen.

You don't think it's chilly? Our office is always cold. In fact, James wears a hoodie 365. Every single day. That's right. Yeah, Kelly likes it pretty freezing in the control room, so I got to put it on. When I shake hands with folks out in the lobby, I apologize many times because my fingers are like ice. But anyway, it keeps us all very attentive, and that's a good thing.

I love it. I love it. You know what, Ken? Let's start off with Mark today. Mark out of Charleston. Charleston, good afternoon. I mean, not Charleston, but Mark, good afternoon. How can Ken and I help?

Hey, guys. Hope you all are doing well. Just have a quick question for you. Yeah. I'm on baby step number two, and I've been a little bit out of order because I started the process a little late in life. And so what I did was I have $2,000 left to finish paying off all my debt. And once I have that done, I'll, you know, will of course be on baby step number three.

So my question is, is I have a 457 plan with the local government agency that I work for, and I have about $26,000, $27,000 in there. No. No answer. Okay. No, no, no. I mean, you're $2,000 away. You know, what do you make a month, Mark? Well, so $70,000 annually, so per month, you know, whatever that equals out to. I mean, well, you're making $70,000 annually, so per month, whatever that equals out to. I mean, well, you're making $70,000 annually, so you're making good money. Your payoff date is what? If you don't touch anything and you keep paying it off, how long before you pay the $2,000 off?

Next month. Yeah, don't touch the $457,000 account at all because you're going to get penalized on some level. You don't need to. You don't need to do anything. Not whatsoever, brother. Not whatsoever. And then from there, you'll be done next month and then i'll take the last you know month and at first maybe the first three months of next year

and just really get on an aggressive budget mark and just really really buckle down to go ahead and get your three to six months in your account and then from there man just move on and just really start focusing on now what i would definitely definitely say is you can pause investment this month and next month. And actually, I want you to stop because I want you to focus on building your babysit number three, which is your three months. So that would stop putting money into the 457 right now until you can get to babysit number four. All right. OK. Good job.

Hey, you're so close, Mark. And we love the intensity behind the question, but you're doing great. Don't penalize yourself. You're about ready to be debt-free, and good job. Good on you. That's exciting stuff. You've got to love that gazelle intensity. He's like, I want to pay it now.

And that's good. I don't want to wait 28 days. I'm going to pay it right now. Going out to Sacramento, let's talk to Lonnie. Lonnie, good afternoon. can uh Ken Coleman and I help hi guys um I'm a single mother I have a teenager in the house and um I just started back up so I'm doing baby step one I started this month I'll be done by the end of the month and then headed into baby step two with about fifty thousand dollars worth of debt congrats you just went over that

real quick wait a minute minute. Can we celebrate? You're about to be debt-free in less than 30 days? Let's go. No, no, no. We're finishing Baby Step 1. Oh, number one. She's got 50,000. She's got 50,000.

Yeah. Well, congrats. You're about to get out of debt. Yeah. So I'm on Target, and I'm selling everything that I can, but I know that we're also supposed to. I do have a full-time job. I'm on Target and I'm selling everything that I can, but I know that we're also supposed, I do have a full-time job. I'm a government worker. And so I wanted to find out, I did put my business on hold to help my son through school because he was having a difficult time. So

I teach him at home during the week. And so I put a side business on hold. I'm a master crocheter. So I have an Etsy shop. And so I wanted to know, to help bring in more money, should I start that shop back again, or should I actually look for another second job to help move along faster to tackle number two? Well, so if you pause the Etsy crocheting because of your son's challenges, are you at a place now where the reason that the reason that you actually stopped is now alleviated and you can do that or is that challenge still exist yeah we um in a year i got him caught back up he was about a year behind in high school he's now going to be graduating it looks like a semester early so i'm looking at the possibilities yeah opening up the shop again how much okay how

much were you making uh per month give me an average. It doesn't have to be to the penny, but give me a ballpark idea or specific if you know what it was. How much were you making on the Etsy shop? Only about $100 to $200 a month. Oh, yeah. Is there a goal for that to be a much more substantial side business, or is that just a labor of love? Where would you like to see that go? If we removed all obstacles and I could wave this pencil around and give you this ideal future, what would that look like for that? Well, my end goal is to hit baby step six by the time I'm 55 and I retire from my government job, and then I could do the Etsy shop full-time.

And so I was doing business boutique to help get me, you know, get going on the actual, make it a substantial business. How many hours could you give if we don't do the Etsy shop and we get you a part-time job to help pay off the step faster? How many hours realistically, now that's the key word here, how many hours could you give a week to a second job? Well, I was doing DoorDash before all this hit, too, and I was doing about 20 to 30 hours a week, but now I've got a cracked motor, so I can't do that anymore. So I'm looking for other ways where I don't have to use my car.

So the answer is 20 to 30 hours? Yeah, 20 to 30 hours. Yeah, get a 20 to 30-hour job, and that will help make enough money to get the engine fixed right give you more options and then knock this 50,000 out quick yes I would spend the 20 to 30 hours on a part-time job and that all goes towards the baby steps you can do this what you've done with your son single moms Anthony I have such a huge heart for him this woman is a You've got this. Hold on the Etsy thing. You'll get there.

But hold. Right now, let's get you out of debt and change your life. I agree. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. folks i love telling you about well-made well-thought-out products today i'm talking about grip six belts i don't know about you but I'm not a fan of traditional belts. They never fit right, and they're uncomfortable. Grip6 belts are unique. Owner BJ designed a truly modern, minimalist belt made of high-quality materials with no holes, no flap, and no bulk. And the buckles come in really cool designs and are interchangeable. I personally own these belts

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This is the Dave Ramsey Show. We would love to take your questions. Anything around life, money. We have the number one career expert in the building today, Ken Coleman. Host of the Ken Coleman Show. And I love young people, millennials, and helping them really get out of debt, avoid debt,

and start building wealth early on. So, if you have any questions, give us a call, 888-825-5225. Jamie is with us in Huntsville, Alabama. Good afternoon, Jamie. How can Ken and I help? Hi, Ken and Ayo. I appreciate y'all taking time to take my call. Sure.

So my question involves a new family vehicle. So we are on step four, five, and six. We are going to be needing to look at moving into another new-to-us family vehicle in a couple months. And so my question is how to determine the amount of money that is appropriate for us to spend on another vehicle. All right. So talk me through the process. How much money do you have saved right now to go towards a car? So we have saved $50,000, not for a car, but just have put that kind of money aside.

We have other home items and other things that we know on down the road we're going to spend money on. But when I look at a family vehicle, it kind of ranges from $17,000 to $27,000. And the fiscally smart side of me, I've always been very frugal. I'm like, well, let's look at the lesser expensive. But then if we do the $27,000, then that'll give us a little bit more accessories, maybe a little bit more longevity and more comfort. This $50,000, is that your emergency fund? No, not including.

So that's $50,000 on top of that. Okay, cool. How much do you make a year? $120,000. That's your household income, $120,000? Correct. All right, cool. So here's what I generally teach teach that your car's value should not

be worth more than 50 of your yearly income okay so with that being said you can look at a six thousand dollar car if you paid for it cash worth okay um you're gonna buy a car that's three to five years old nothing newer than you know not a one-year-old not a current model not a brand new one and so for you saying you want to spend twenty seven thousand dollars on a vehicle um as long as that is not coming out of your emergency fund is not going to stop you from investing into baby set number four uh twenty seven thousand dollars with your income is perfectly fine all right uh so that's what i. Now, let me also say this. I'm a car guy. Ken's a car guy.

There's nothing wrong with buying cars for accessories, but buy the car that you want because you're going to be driving this car for five, six years. I wouldn't say, hey, go buy a $10,000 car. You're debt free.

You have a fully funded emergency fund. I want you to enjoy baby steps four, five, six, and seven within the proper means. So buying a $27,000 car at your season of life and stage of life, there's nothing wrong with that. You see anything wrong with that, Ken? I don't. I think this comes down to priorities. Of the $50,000, is there a specific amount of that $50,000 that's earmarked towards the house and other valuable things as well? Well, no. I mean, everything is completely functional in the house, but we're going to want to upgrade and expand our kitchen at some point. And I am always

just the one that wants to spend the least amount of money. But then my husband's like, you know, we kind of want to have something that we're going to be enjoying for because we run cars into the ground, which is why we're going to get another one. Are you on the $17,000 model and he's looking at a $27,000 model? Is that what's going on? I think it's flipped. That's it.

Oh, that's you? Yeah, she's the correct yeah i'm i'm on the lower end and he's he's on the higher end okay so here's the deal um since there's nothing in that 50 000 that's earmarked towards something that's super high priority and you understand what i'm saying i know eventually the kitchen that's going to add some value to your home i think it's a expenditure. But the fact of the matter is a car that's dependable and comfortable within reason is a higher priority purchase than expanding or renovating your kitchen. So I think it's a really simple decision. I would not stew over this. I love that you've got a model that you've picked out for 17. Your husband's got one that's picked out for 27. I think you guys have worked really, really hard

to be debt-free and to be in this position. I'd probably do the 27, and that way everybody's happy. You've got a nice car. You're proud of it, and you dig in. But I think anywhere between the 17 and 27, I think that's fine. You're certainly within the percentage that AO teaches.

But make this a fun conversation with the hubs. Yeah. Don't stress out over your version versus his. Maybe you meet in the middle. But the last thing I would tell you on a very practical note, I would do your homework on whatever the $27,000 model is because if it is a type of car that is known for having a lot of mechanical issues, I would take that into account. And I don't want to endorse any cars, but I'm already thinking about two or three brands that if I spent $27,000 on it,

that car is going to run for a very long time and be very, very dependable. And I know others, AO, that you could buy for $27,000. And within a year, you're going to be spending thousands of dollars on just basic electrical stuff there are car brands out there i'm going to dance around this let's do this no no no i don't want to do that but i'm just saying there are car brands out there that are designed and built to entertain you for two to three years because the people that are buying them either are wealthy enough or irresponsible enough, depending on how they do it, to where once this thing starts to break down and they're really nice looking cars and they're well made, except the electrical can go. You can get on the Google, as I like to tell my kids, and see which brands these are.

And so people don't care, though. They're going to drive for two, three years and then they sell them. They buy the next model. It's kind of like the newest iPhone. So pay attention to that because there are some great cars out there that a $27,000 purchase is going to be a very nice vehicle, but also very low maintenance because of the durability. So that would be the only last thing I'd say there. Let's make sure it's not a $27,000 shiny thing that costs you five to ten over the next three to four years. You said something there, Ken, that I want America to hear again.

Do the research, especially when you're paying cash. Yes. I'm in the process now of trying to find a car that I can trade in my Acura for and pay cash for. And I'm spending a lot of time because, you know, I want a nice car. And I'm, okay, how much is it going to cost me in maintenance? I'm even calling around to dealerships. Let's say, for example, if it was a Honda, for example, I'm calling them, asking them questions. How much is this car going to cost me in maintenance?

This is the year I'm looking at. What are the most common issues that come up around this mileage what should i expect in the future um because here's the thing when you go and finance a car you just sign it and just say oh whatever yeah but when you spend your hard-earned money you need to spend time to do the and do the research and then here's another tip before you buy the car take it to the dealership that produced the car and have them do a pre-sale inspection. I love that advice. So that way, if you do spend $27,000 on the car, that particular production company, that car company can tell you, hey, here's what's going on with the car or the car is in good conditions. Go buy it.

So there's nothing wrong with purchasing cars. And or the car is in good conditions go buy it so there's nothing wrong with with with with purchasing cars and i want to say this before we go to break can i every time i hear this i i just get i get a little funny tell me if i'm wrong okay tell me if i'm wrong right here live on the show when people get in baby steps four five six and seven they still act like they have to have this cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap life that they can't enjoy their hard work and the money that they have. And I think sometimes they overthink it. Like, oh, man, I still have to eat beans and rice, rice and beans,

and I'm making $200,000 a year. I'm out of debt. I got a savings account. No. Go get you a steak. I think you're absolutely right. And here's what's happening. So there's some, it's the brain doing what the brain is supposed to do.

And there's some neuroscience behind this. What we focus on is what we act on. And so when you've been in a gazelle intense mode, you know, for so long and you begin to get into baby steps four or five and six, it's really hard for your brain to kind of change gears because you've been focused on being tight, being disciplined for so long. And so you've got to begin to do what you're saying, which is, hey, we've earned this. Let's get a nice car. And we know what to do.

So it's about changing your focus. After you've gotten through baby steps one through three, you can do it. Celebrate a little bit. Yeah, absolutely right. It took me maybe a week. Oh, we'd love to talk to you guys. 888-825-5225. Give us a call and we'll get back to you right after this break. 888-825-5225 888-825-5225

This is the Dave Ramsey Show and Ken Coleman and I would love to answer your questions and help you walk through whatever journey or season that you're in right now. And so we're going to kick it back off with Danielle from

Dallas, Texas. Danielle, good afternoon. How can Ken and I help? Good afternoon guys. How are y'all? Good. Good to talk with you. Okay, so let me just get to the point. I am 19 years old. I'm a college sophomore. I have no debt, and I have about $25,000 in my savings, and I want to know what next step I should take. You have about how much in your savings? And it's Daniel, correct?

Yes, Daniel. Yeah, so sorry about that, man. It's fine. And I said I have about $25,000. Okay. $25K in your savings. Do you have any debt at all? Not at all.

Not at all. I'm just faithful. Okay. All right. Are you in school? Are you a full-time student? What do you spend your time on? Yes, I'm a full it. Okay. All right. Are you in school? Are you a full-time student? What do you spend your time on? Yes, I'm a full-time student.

Okay. And I also work part-time for the school. Okay. And are you cash flowing your way through, or has it already been paid for? It's been paid for by the school. Oh, fantastic. All right. Okay.

Wow. This young man's on his way. So he's got 25 large. 25 large. Very large. I'm curious, Daniel. What do you want to do with it? So I'm looking to join in the computer engineering field.

I'm going to be one of the first in my family. Okay. And I'm just trying to change my family tree. We haven't really been the best with finances so i'm looking to change that myself okay all right well here comes i mean you have no debt school is paid for will you have to pay for any more schooling once you graduate this season uh no sir all right so then the twenty five thousand dollars man honestly uh this is in your savings account correct yes all right so what I would do is I'll go ahead and keep three months in your savings account. And since you don't need it for school, I will go ahead and start investing that, man.

I will go ahead and open up a Roth IRA and max that out. It's going to be about $6,500 for this year. I would do that before this year is over so that way you can have that taken care of for this calendar year. And then after that, man, just keep making money, saving, treat yourself to a little bit, but just make sure you do not take out any debt. You don't have any credit cards, correct? Not at all. I don't plan on taking any soon.

Do you have a car? Are you driving right now? I'm not driving right now. I'm at school, but, yes, I do have a car. Okay. So what year is your car it's an 09 civic oh man well you got a honda product you're in good place man that'll run for another 3 000 years so you're good there listen you're 19 years old 25 000 in the savings account i will go ahead and average out what what will you need for three months. At your age right now, you probably

need about 15 grand in that emergency fund for yourself. I would take that other $10,000, jump on the phone with one of our smart, best of pros and say, hey, I have $10,000 I want to invest. And Anthony and Ken told me to open up a Roth IRA. I would definitely do that. That's going to be $6,500. And ask them, what else can you do with the remaining part? But as of right now, Daniel, man, awesome, awesome job. Awesome job. Yeah, fantastic work. You know, and you know what? Also, the main thing, too, not the main thing, but I would suggest, you need to pick up a copy of your book, Ken, The Proximity Principle. Sharp young man. He's about to get around some good people. So make sure you get a copy of that book.

Well, hey, hey, hey, let's just give it to the young man. I mean, well, I was hoping he was going to say that, but that's your book. Yeah, well, hang on the line, Kelly. We'll get that for you. And you know exactly what you want to do. And that book is written for people who know what they want to do, but they're not sure how to get there. And so check that out and read it, do it. There's five people in five places that you need to be around and be in, and opportunity will knock on your door. And this young man's got a great head start, Ayo. Good stuff. Thanks for the call. He really does, man. You know what? And I need to read these names better and slower. I've

been moving fast all day. So we're going to go out to Los Angeles, California, have a conversation with Craig. Craig, good afternoon. How can Ken and I help? Hi, how are you, Anthony and Kim? I'm a first-time caller. I'm in a unique spot. I'm a 54-year-old divorced dad. I was recently severanced out of a very highly paying entertainment job, and while COVID's going on, I have not got a new job, and I'm still getting paid. I have literally zero debt. In the divorce, I gave my ex-wife our house. I've got about $1.5 million in my IRA. I've got a side cash savings, whatever you want to call it, of about a quarter of a million dollars.

But I am not working. I literally have no debt, and I'm trying to decide after the divorce, I've been renting a small condo. And in Los Angeles, obviously, the housing prices are very high, and at 54 years old, I don't expect to work more than 10 years. And I'm really torn about buying something or continuing to rent. Down the road, I will inherit a small home that's paid off from my parents. Any idea how long that down the road is? You know, I hope it's a long time away, but ironically, probably at the time, I'm ready to hang it up myself. So let's say 10 years.

Okay. Well, let me ask you this. If you were going to buy something, what would be the difference? Because it's just you, or are the kids shared custody? Yeah, my kids are grown. My kids are grown. College is paid for. So I'm curious. So here's what I'm curious about. What would be the mortgage versus the rent, so your current rent, how much of a difference would there be? Yeah, so that's a great question. But my question to you guys, it's a little complicated because I'm sitting on this cash savings. I'm also getting paid.

I certainly wouldn't buy anything until I found another job. Good. You already answered my next step. And by the way, how long is the severance going to last? Another year. Okay. All right, keep going. So, you know, my issue is several.

So I've chosen to rent a very small place in Los Angeles. My rent is just under $2,000 a month. My expenses are next to nothing. If I was going to buy something, I'd probably be looking in the $700 to $1 million range. I'm assuming we're looking at a mortgage of around $4,000 a month. Yeah. Ayo, this is a no-brainer for me. Right now, I'd sit tight. I would sit tight and rent. First of all, I can't believe you're renting something in Los Angeles for just under $2,000 a month. It's a small condo.

That's exactly right. Well, but still. I mean, here's why. You know the rest of that equation. It's not the $4,000 a month that I'm concerned about. It's you having to use that cash for the down payment to get there. Correct. And I love that you've got a quarter million sitting in the bank.

I'd say you sit tight. I think the entertainment industry is going to open back up, and it's going to thaw pretty quickly in 2021. That would be my guess. And I'm assuming with your experience and your connections, you're going to be able to step back in and still do the kind of money that you've been making, correct? The good news is I don't have to make the same kind of money.

But you understand my point is sit tight. Sit tight. Don't touch that cash. I wouldn't buy until you get your income back. Yeah, man. And here's the thing, Greg. There's no rush. You don't need a house right now.

That's right. That's right. And so right now I want right that's right and so right now i want you to sit tight like ken said go ahead and start pocketing the money so that way you have enough money for your down payment to get into your home at your age i'm not buying a million dollar home though okay i'm just not going to do that because of the expenses that will come with that i'm going to look on the outskirts of the city of los angeles you can find you a good home right around six to eight hundred and i know that because because I'm from the Los Angeles area. And so

I would do that, get you something that's not going to have a lot of grass. And technically in California, you don't have a lot of grass, but just sit tight until you get your job, till you know your income. So this way, your mortgage payment is twenty five percent of your take home pay. All right. So sit tight. You're going to be all right. You don't need it right now. There's no need to rush it. But I'm excited for you because your future is bright, man. You got 1.5 in the IRA. Come on, man.

Let's go. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. We'll be right back. blinds.com 100 satisfaction guarantee means even if you mismeasure or pick the wrong color they'll remake your blinds 100 free you get free samples free shipping and with the new promos they every month you'll save even more use promo code ramsey to get the best deal ken today's question comes from hannah in texas you visit davramsey.com to ask i got the promotion i have been gunning for at work it came in at an unexpected time during covid some layoffs were made and i was slid into the super supervisor position. I thought that I wanted now that I am here. I hate it.

I feel like I am more of a right hand man as opposed to being the boss. I feel guilty for getting this promotion in light of someone losing their job. So I am not proud of myself. I am more bored out of my mind and not learning everything. And I think I belong in a different field altogether. The pay is phenomenal, but I am miserable. Any advice, Ken, for job hunting while also trying to make a new career choice? Yeah, this is a situation here.

There's a lot of complexity inside of this question. But what we see here is that this is simply not the right fit for you, Hannah, and that's okay. I would tell you that I'm concerned that you feel guilt, although I understand why you feel guilt. I think that's a natural human reaction, but don't feel guilty. The bottom line is you were identified as somebody who deserved a promotion. They put you in that position. Turns out you just don't like it, and so you have to say, all right, what do I learn from this? The first thing you would learn from something like this is the good old-fashioned pencil and paper and write down, what of this current supervisor job sucks the life out of me?

And let's just write those things down. When I am in this situation, when I have to have this conversation, when I'm doing this work, I feel drained. I don't enjoy it. And let's be really clear on that. And that becomes the avoid at all cost list of type of work that you would do. You just avoid that. And then you go to the other side of the paper, and it's going to be a whole lot less, so it should be easy to identify. Was there anything about the current role that you did enjoy?

And let's identify that as well. And then as it relates to advice on job hunting while also trying to make a new career choice, it's okay to not be super clear right away. And from a job hunting standpoint, you want to move back into a position that you were in before, something similar like that where, again, you're good at the job. And so from a proficiency standpoint, you've got it while you're trying to figure out the passion stuff. And then I would tell you to go to KenColeman.com and get the free career clarity guide. You can download it for free at KenColeman.com. And it walks you through what I do

on the Ken Coleman show. I'd also tell you to listen to the show or you can listen to the podcast if you're working while the radio show is on. And listen to other callers, call me, and we'll walk through this. But the career clarity guide, Anthony, walks people through the three indicators that every human being has as it relates to what you were created to do from a work standpoint. One is talent, what you do best, hard skills, soft skills. The second is passion, which I define as work you really love to do. And then mission is the third indicator, and that is the results of the work that matter deeply to you. Where your talent, passion, and mission intersect, that's your contribution zone. I call it the sweet spot.

And so everybody's purpose statement looks like this. I'm going to use what I do best to do the work I love to produce results that matter deeply to me. So that's where she needs to get to. Love it. Christian is with us in Oklahoma City. Christian, good afternoon. How can Ken and I help? Hello. Hello, Christian. You are live on the Dave Ramsey show. Hi, how are you? Good. How can we help? I'm sorry. Hi, I was calling. I have a rare situation. Oh, not rare. It's rare for me. I was in a really toxic relationship. So now I'm a single mom. I got free, but I'm a teacher in Oklahoma. So I don't really make a ton of money, but I'm in baby step two. So what I did, I had my own apartment with my son and I was spending way too much money. And so I moved in with a friend, like she's just like my aunt, but she also is raising

her granddaughter. And now I'm kind of second guessing, and this is helping me speed up the baby step two process. But now I'm really second guessing, was it a good idea? Because my son is two and a half, almost three, and he's just like emotionally not adjusting well. And so I'm really like, he still cries sometimes. And it's like, I just want to go home, mommy. And he's just like not understanding that this is our new home. And so like the mom guilt is kicking in like really hard.

So I do, I go back and get my own apartment to protect him? Because I still have, even though I've sped up the process a lot, I still have about two more years before I get out of my, you know, very well-known student loan debt. So what do you guys recommend? How much of a savings are you achieving by living with this? Did you say your aunt? Well, she's, like, not blood, but still close enough. Okay, great. So how much are you saving if you were on your own in an apartment

where you were versus living with her? How much money are you saving? Well, it's definitely a couple of hundred, but I also switched to a different teaching district, and so I have a slight pay raise. And so I think that just moving out of there, it's about $400 a month. Is the plan to stay with her until you pay off the debt in two years? Yes, sir. It also is like I would like to get through baby step three and then even try to move out of here into our own home. That would be my big plan and my big goal,

but that would add on even more years to it. How long have you been in this new situation with the aunt? We're going on the second. We're almost at two months. Yeah, you know, your son, you know, I would seek the advice. I would seek the advice maybe of a of a specialist a childhood counselor i think you know you've got enough margin maybe you do a session maybe just pay for one session and kind of get a uh what i would call a consultation and get some tips it'd probably be worth it i know that

that's available a lot of counseling centers will do that where they'll do a parent uh consultation and i'd get some advice from a professional beyond what i'm going to say in AO. You can jump in, but I think here's what I think as a dad of three, I believe that kids are tremendously resilient. And I think at two and a half, your little guy is at the, is at the most curious point of his life. We know this from research that toddlers ask hundreds of questions a day and they're asking questions not to be obnoxious, even though it feels like that. They're truly just trying to get to the bottom of things. And so he's had a, uh, he's had a change take place and there's another kid in the house. There's a lot of stuff going on, um, which, which the professional, and I really hope you take my

advice on that. I think you can afford that. And I think you should do that. However, he is resilient. I think I'd answer the questions. I, you know, I, I think it never hurts that, and I think you should do that. However, he is resilient. I think I'd answer the questions. I think it never hurts to just be as honest and as clear as you can, even with a two-and-a-half-year-old. When he asks you a point-blank question, answer it. Don't put it off. Just say, Mommy and you are saving money right now. We're going to live here for a while, so this is home. And do your best to make it comfortable and just grow

that bond i think if dr john delaney would hear he'd say part of this is just when you're with him make that time as valuable as possible and also show him a lot of safety and a lot of love with a lot of intimate time together and get some new routines and stick to routines i know that all kids love routines but certainly at that age, I think routines are huge. That would be my non-professional advice. Christian, how much were you paying in rent before you moved in with your aunt? And I know it's way too much. Once I got on the every dollar budget, I realized I was paying $1,000 a month.

Okay, so you're saving more than $400 a month then. Because if you're paying $1,000 and you moved in with her, that means you're saving $1,000 a month, correct? Oh, I'm sorry. I think I misunderstood your question. Previously at the apartment, I was spending about $1,000 a month just on rent, not with all the others. So whenever i'm moving

with my aunt i'm now paying 800 okay so you're paying her 800 so now that's why you're saving 400 yeah with the raise that she's got okay okay yeah so but that being said christian i i agree with ken just have the conversation with your child he said it real good you can go see a counselor but at the end of the day, my mama was here. He was like, he's two years old. He's just going to fall in line. So that's what I mean. Have the conversation in a respectful way.

You know your son. But at the same time, understand he's a kid. And he has to do what you tell him to do. But when you are home, spend quality time with him. But I would not. But when you are home, spend quality time with him. But I would not. I will make sure this is not a long-term thing, though. All right?

I do believe that you and your son should have your own place. That's just my opinion. At the end of the day, he's a kid. He's going to do what you tell him to do. America, we'll be right back. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. event, product, or service and didn't have a chance to write it down, don't worry. We list everything you've heard about during this episode in the podcast show notes section, or head over to DaveRamsey.com and click Dave recommends.