The Ramsey Show - App - Others Don't Get to Make Decisions with Your Money (Hour 3)

Episode Date: June 7, 2019

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. Thank you for joining us. Open phones at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Beth starts off this hour in Fort Collins, Colorado.

Hi, Beth. How are you? Hey, Dave. I'm great. It's great to talk to you today. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up?

Good. So my husband and I have been following your plans for a while now, and we're just finishing up with baby step three, and things are going great for us. However, I'm calling today because my mother-in-law and my brother-in-law are struggling financially, and we're trying to help them get on board with the day plan. And I'm worried that if they don't get a better handle on their finances, then my husband and I are going to have to step in and help support them. And we already have a full in and help support them. And we already have a full plate with three young kids. And so just wondering if you have any advice on how to help them help themselves.

How old is your mother-in-law? She's 71. And what does your brother-in-law have to do with her? Does he live with her? So, yes, she's allowed him to live with her in an apartment. My father-in-law passed away about 11 years ago. What's wrong with your brother-in-law? He's kind of a deadbeat. Poor thing. Yeah, he's just not, doesn't have a lot going on with him, and he's kept a job for the last year, but he's just so far in debt, and he just struggles day to day. He's had some drug issues in the past as well.

If you give Red Bull to a lazy person, you've just got a lazy person. Exactly, yeah. So he's kind of draining my mother-in-law of what little income she has. She has nothing saved at all. Yeah. How is her health? Her health is okay. She's still working.

She's a CNA. How old is the brother-in-law, druggy, lazy guy? He's 31. Okay. All right. Well, number one, I think you and your husband need to have some discussions about what you are willing to do and for whom you're willing to do it. I have pretty strong opinions about that, as you might guess, and that would be a 71-year-old widow lady that is my mom. I'm going to do a lot to take care of her. I'm doing zero for this other guy.

Right. He's a parasite. Uh-huh. Okay. And really, some serious hard times might be good for him. Right. And, you know, the only way I'm doing anything for him is if he's on a whole lot better track than he's on right now.

Like, you know, he's actually working all the time, he's drug-free, and so on. Right. And he's got, you know, a whole different animal starts to evolve than has so far. So I'm worried I have to take care of him later is not a statement I'm going to make. Okay. I might be in a position that I'm wealthy enough that I choose to help him if he is doing some things that are taking him in a positive direction. I'm not going to finance his bad behavior like his mommy did.

Mm-hmm. Because everyone's patted his little hand his whole life and said, it'll get better, sweetie. It ain't going to get better. Mm-hmm. Okay? Because he's a bum. Until he stops bum stuff, then he's going to be there. And I can separate the two of these as far as who I'm willing to help

and what I'm willing to help. So I doubt that you're probably going to talk mom into behaving with money while she's trying to take care of and be codependent with this parasite. Okay. I doubt you're probably going to have much issue You know progress there As long as that relationship stays In that toxic form that it's in It's not good

It's not good for him Because he's not getting better He's not addressing his character issues It's not good for her Because he's sucking the bone marrow out of her life Right Yes that's exactly what's happening It's just disgusting to watch.

It's very difficult. Your husband gets mad on one level, and you get mad on a whole other level watching this. Yes. Yeah, I just read your mail. So you need to keep your mouth shut and step back. That's his family, and let him deal with his family, and you and him talk about it behind closed doors,

and then he has to say whatever is said. You can't say anything. You're just the Wicked Witch of the West. You're not allowed to say anything. You're the daughter-in-law. And so can you tell? Yeah. So anyway, you can do this.

And you guys are what, 35? Yeah, I'm 33. My husband's 36. Yeah, he's the older brother. Yeah. Yeah, he's the oldest, and he's kind of taking over the father figure. The parasite's the baby. Yeah, okay.

Yeah, that's the one. I'm so sorry. It's so painful to watch people you love do stupid stuff that destroys their own lives. It's just hard to watch. It really is. And it's harsh. It just really is, and it's harsh. It just really is. But you need to establish ahead of time what your boundaries are and what your priorities are and under what circumstances you will participate.

If you don't establish that ahead of time, you and your husband, and write it down. So the two of you have your little family constitution of how we're going to deal with mom, how we're going to deal with brother. Okay. If you don't, it's going to get in the moment, and there'll be a lot of emotion around it, more so for him than for you, and then you're going to throw up your hands and go, well, now we're just getting sucked into this thing. And so you need to decide ahead of time what the boundaries are.

Okay. And if you know ahead of time, then when, because it's not a question of when they're going to start asking you for money, or if they're going to start asking you money, it's just a question of when. Exactly. And under what circumstances are you going to participate? And really, I'm going to help mom if you can. And the way you do that is you can talk to her about it. You can get her kind of on an idea that she might want to do a budget.

Show her some of the stuff you're doing. You can't, but he can you can but but i really am not going to give you much hope she's going to do it because any progress she makes he's going to take okay he takes everything and uh and so you know until he's out of the house and on his own again she's not going to be able to really implement a plan because there's so much dysfunction in the family here is what it amounts to. But the last part of that is you guys go finish your job, which is build wealth. Get yourself out of debt like you've done. You get your college funds in place for your kids.

You go build wealth, and you're sitting there, and we're 10 years down the road, and you guys are millionaires. You're in a lot different position to answer these questions then. If mom's 81 and junior's out of the house, and now we want to take care of mom, it's kind of a no-brainer. Yeah, we'll take care of her. Okay. Even though she was in a codependent thing, yeah, I was still going to take care of her.

It's her mom. Yeah, that's fine. Nothing wrong with that. But, again, you've just got to be careful that you're not financing someone else's crazy land. And that's what you face. And the book Boundaries will help you understand all that. This is like a Boundaries day-to-day.

Wow. Half the calls. Open phones at 888-825-5225. The big thing is this. The nicest people you'll ever meet are enablers. There's no mean enablers. Enablers are always very sweet people. But they can't say no because they're so sweet.

And so they give a drunk a drink. They give broken people money that keeps them broken instead of making them face their self in the mirror and fix their brokenness and grow up and grow out and become all that

God intended for them to be. So really when you're an abler you're really not nice because you're really making a drunk stay drunk. Yeah. One question I get asked all the time is, do I need life insurance? Listen, the whole point of life insurance is to replace your income for someone who counts on you.

So if you have a spouse or you have kids, yes, you need term life insurance. It's the only way to protect them until you're out of debt and have built up your wealth. You're only digging a deeper hole if you waste money on cash value plans since it robs you of the ability to make real progress. And that's why I send you to Zander Insurance, and I have for 20 years. That's where I get all my insurance, and they only offer the plans I recommend. It is not expensive. It's not complicated.

And Zander will be there as your guide every step of the way. Visit Zander.com or call 800-356-4282. You need to get this taken care of. I can give you the advice, and I can tell you where to go, but it's really up to you to take that important step to get your family protected. That's Zs.com. They have a 100% satisfaction guarantee. It means even if you mess up, if you mismeasure or you pick the wrong color,

they're going to remake your window blind for free. With Blinds.com, you also get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you're going to save money. Check out the promo code RAMSEY at Blinds.com. Moesha is in Hawaii. She says, I'm 21 years old. My husband's in the military. The only debt we have is our car, which is $24,000 left to pay.

We both want to get rid of it, but we don't know what steps to take to make that happen. We have a used car as well that we paid for in cash, but it's not as reliable. What do you recommend? I recommend you get rid of it. I don't know what your income is, but I'm going to guess at 21 in the military, you're not making a pile of money. Could be wrong. And that $24, 000 is probably eating your lunch so yeah i'm getting rid of that thing the steps you do to get rid of it is you have to find out

what it is worth in terms of if you were to sell it for instance on craigslist that's called a private party sale you go to um just go on the internet and look at a private party sale, and you can figure out what the car is worth. And let's pretend it's worth $20,000 and you owe $24,000, which would probably be close to right, which means you're upside down. You're in the hole $4,000. In order to sell it, you have to be able to get the title from the bank.

They're not going to give you the title unless you pay them $24,000. You're only going to get $20,000 from your buyer, so you have to have the other $4,000 figured out. And that means you have to either borrow that money from your local credit union or work extra and save up the $4,000 in order to do that. But my guess is that this car was a huge, stupid mistake, and it's probably hammering you. You're probably hemorrhaging money right now. So I could be wrong, but I'm not. So, you know, you do need to get rid of it, and you're going to have to go borrow the money,

even if you put the other $4,000 on a credit card. Dave Ramsey said use a credit card. No, Dave Ramsey said you're already $24,000 in debt. When you sell the car, you're $4,000 in debt. I think we're going in the right direction here, people. So you move that debt onto something else and get rid of this car. But you've got to cover the amount that you're in the hole, the amount you're upside down in order to make the transaction work.

Tamara is with us in New York City. Hi, Tamara. How are you? Hi, Dave. I'm okay. I was calling because for the last two years, I've just found myself in a lot of debt. Before that, I was, like, I think, good at saving and managing myself. What happened? I had two kids in college at the same time, and they didn't follow my advice they picked very expensive

schools one of them got some scholarships and the other one didn't get any and you supported their bad decisions and i had to support no you didn't have to you chose to okay yes but then now i i have like credit card debt because I charged some of their tuition on my credit card. Yeah, on a school that they couldn't afford. Yeah. Okay. Yes. So is this over?

Are they out of school? Well, no. I just told my son because he wasn't giving me his grades and stuff like that. I told him I'm not going to support your school if that's how you're going to behave. Okay. your school if that's how you're going to behave correct and then my daughter she feels like because she gets at least like 60 to 70 percent of scholarships for her school that like you know the father and i should split and pay the rest oh so she gets to tell you how you're supposed to do with your money this is a bright kid very manipulative no she didn't get to tell you anything title

generation is very entitled no your daughter is very entitled yes yeah okay um but i just i don't like debt and i don't like the financial situation i'm in and i have like old emergency fund but it's like every month it's like i find myself taking a thousand dollars from it so it was like about 25 000 now it's about 17 and i have about 40 000 of debt so i was wondering if i just take that emergency fund pay it down and just snowball the rest of them and start over yes ma'am yes if and only if you learn a new word you ready for the word no that's the word no can you use that word okay yes i'm trying no i'm not you don't try you have to do it because here's the thing if you don't stop this the titanic is going to go down you you can you can stick your finger in one little hole but it's it's hemorrhaging on the other end the The thing's just bleeding water. I mean, it's just everywhere.

So, you know, your daughter is going to go to a school in a place that you agree with because you can afford to support it. Or she gets nothing. And the same with your son. It has to fit your budget. Or the answer is no, you don't get anything. They don't get to tell you what to do with your money. It is not child abuse to not support your children's stupid decisions. That's not child abuse.

You're not a bad mom. And I don't care if she's 20 and she stomps her foot and her little lip sticks out and she has a little fiat. Oh, bless her little heart. I couldn't give a crap less. You don't get to make decisions with my money. And when you make decisions that I approve of, then you have a shot at me financing them. But I am not paying for you to make decisions that I do not approve of now why do i not approve of them two reasons one is it's a bad decision and i'm smarter than you because i'm older than you and i have this thing called wisdom and experience the second reason is

it's my freaking money so i get to decide where it goes to i don't have to put up with you 20 year olds telling me where my money's gonna go and so you've got to reset your parenting with her and you can do that gently and kindly you're a gentler kinder person than i am by nature i'm a little more in your face and you're you're sweet but you can still be sweet and still say no because it doesn't fit your budget. She doesn't get to tell you where your money goes, and you're not going to endorse with your checkbook her bad behaviors and her bad decisions. These are three reasons.

Sorry to interrupt, but one other thing is that there is a company that is pitching to me for my student loan debt, which I didn't include that in the debt. It's like they can help me discharge the debt, but pay them a fee. No? No, there's no such thing as discharging student loan debts unless you're permanently disabled and you're on SSI or you're dead. These are the only two ways that student loan debts get discharged.

That's a scam company. You need to stay away from them. If it's a traditional federally insured Sally Mae loan, that's the answer to that. So, yeah, you've got to say no. You've got to put some boundaries around your life and your money, and then you know how to manage money. You just have chosen not to because these kids have been running your life instead of you running your life instead of

you running your life. And I'm sorry that you got there, but that's exactly what you described to me. And you can get out of this. Yes, in that case, if you will stop the bleeding, stop giving money to people that you can't afford to give because they're making decisions you can't afford to support, then yes, you would use your emergency fund, and yes, you'd get on a tight budget, and yes, you would snowball your way right through this. And you can do all of that. You really can. You know exactly what to do.

You've just got to go do it now. It's very hard, though, to tell your kids no. It's very hard to tell people that you love no, even if they're being stupid. And it's just hard. I mean, every one of you have got a relative. I have relatives. You look at them, and you go, that was stupid. And you don't say it out loud, but you're just looking at them going,

you're stupid. And, you know, and if they come to you asking for you to support stupid, you're not loving them by supporting their stupid. You're actually participating in something that's bringing harm to them. So I'm not going to finance something that brings harm to people that I love. Why would I do that? I love them. That's tough love.

No, darling, it's just real love. Love that supports something that's damaging to someone you love is not love. That's called codependency. It's different than love. Way different than love. It's different than love. Way different than love. It's a toxic form of relationships. All of us have some of it at one time or another in our lives.

But boy, it sure does get over into the money stuff. Woo! Man, oh man. There you go. This is The Dave Ramsey Solutions, Joe and Rosemary are with us. Hey, guys, how are you? Very good, Dave. We're excited to be here.

Well, we're honored to have you. Welcome. Where do you live? We live in Edinburgh, Texas. And what's that near? It's down by McAllen, close by South Padre Island. Oh, nice. Okay.

Welcome to Nashville and all the way here to do a debt-free scream. Yes, we are. Love it. How much have you paid off? $172,125. And 44 cents. I love it. And how long did this take? Four years. Good for you. And your range of income during that time? We started right about $152,000 and now we're sitting right about $200,000. Cool. What do you all do for a living? I'm a regional manager for a Texas-based grocery company. And I'm a retail consultant for a distributor.

Okay. Very good. And you brought the kiddos with you. What are their names and ages? So here we have Audrey. She's 16. And Erica, she's 14. And our actual story, we're a blended family. So when me and Joe got married nine years ago, Joe had two children and I had two. We came into the families with both debts. Joe has Nancy. She's 26. She couldn't be here today. She's already got her family. And Ethan is 16 and he's with his mom. Okay. Very cool. Very cool. So what kind of

debt was the $172,000? So it was all kinds of debt. Student loans that I brought into the marriage, cars, and then, of course, the home. You paid off your house? Yes, Dave. We paid off our house. I'm looking at weird people. Yes. Way to go, you guys. So we're so excited we paid off our house.

You ought to be excited. That's awesome. What's this house worth? So our house is right about $156,000. And you own it. Yes, it's ours. I love it. So we kept hearing you say on the radio show about walking in the backyard and stepping on the grass when it's yours.

And it's such an amazing feeling. It is. It's amazing. Good for you guys. So what started this process of getting out of debt? Set your hair on fire four years ago. So we had been trying to get out of debt before, but we really never were serious about it. And about four years ago, I got moved in my job from one location to another, and I was going to be asked to drive an hour there and an hour back. So at that time,

I was normal, and I had a luxury SUV that I was paying a lot of money on. And we decided, well, we got to trade that in because we're just going to ruin it and put so many miles on it. So when we did and we traded it in for a cheaper car, we realized in that moment how much money we were throwing away on that luxury SUV. And that's kind of just what propelled us into getting this going. The other thing that helped us is just listening to you. We listened to you. On my drive to work for an hour. All I did was listen to you, listen to you there and listen to you back. So that's what helped drive me into, okay, we got to do this. We got to do this. Bought the book, read it in the same day

and brought it home to Joe and said, we've got to do this. And the funny story is I made this spreadsheet when I got home and I put all of our bills on it and put it on the mirror in our restroom. And then I get home that afternoon, I couldn't find it. I was like, where's our spreadsheet? Well, Joe had seen it and crumbled it up and threw it in the trash. And I was like, why did you do that?

And he's like, well, what were you trying to tell me? What were you trying to give me to know? And I said, well, this is our debt. This is our reality. So this piece of paper has been with us for four years. And every time we paid off a debt, we just scratched it off. But for four years, this paper has been with us. Went into the trash, but we took it out.

We paid every bill one at a time. So, Joe, she's reading books and putting stuff on your mirror and everything else. What made you decide that you needed to jump in on this? Well, after the machismo wore off that I needed to get on board, I participated and understood what we needed to take care of. And it was one step at a time. And primarily the first thing that I wanted to do was to feel that we were debt free at one point and later on down the road once you saw the light at the end of the tunnel was not a train you were ready to go each time that we crossed something out yeah it felt good from the

loans to the school loans um when we paid off the car she said you got to do this and i did and i walked into the credit union with the with the checkbook in hand and wrote the check and it felt good that i wasn't making a payment this is it this is it and then we did that to the second car and it did the same thing yeah you know dave i'm sorry i know that that's what um you know to his point i knew that he needed a little bit of encouragement so when we had to make that final payment, I said, you do this. You go make this final payment on this bill. You walk into the credit union. And he did, and that's where I think it really changed.

That feels good, man. It feels good. That's good. I love it. Well done. He even came home with donuts to celebrate because he's like, you know, I just did something. I just paid off this car, and I wrote this check. And even the people at the counter were looking at me like what

you want to pay it off you're writing a check for what uh but he went in and did it and after that we were just on fire I love it that's very cool how long have y'all been married so last week was our anniversary and we've been married nine years okay all right and so five years uh kind of doing normal stuff and then four years on fire. Yes. Okay. And so you had two little girls when you got married. Mm-hmm. And you're a single mom at that point. Divorced, I guess?

Yeah, divorced. So during that time, I was still making good money, but I knew that I had to start my life again. And it was a struggle because I had debt. And at that time, I moved in with mom and dad, and it was a struggle because i had debt and at that time i moved in with mom and dad and it was a struggle but by the grace of god i found joe and we've done this together yeah amen you know that's what i was thinking if you look back all the way back there when it was just the three of you before joe before marriage and everything and you fast forward to today and you're standing here with a paid for house and a great husband and great kids.

I mean, life is good. It is. Thank God. There's probably a lady out there somewhere that's got two little girls right now listening to this that wonders if it's ever going to be okay. And you're walking proof it is. And part of the reason is because you took control of things. You took the bull by the horns, even if it was a big bull, and wrestled him down. And then Joe comes along beside and goes over at the bank and pays stuff off

and comes home with donuts. Life is good. It was. Yeah, this is good. And all the way down to the house and everything. Wow! I mean, wow! This is great!

You changed your family tree, you two. Well done. Proud of you. Excellent. What do you tell people the key to getting out of debt is? So for us, we've heard it all the time about the budget, but it is so true. You need to sit down and do the budget to know where every dollar is going. That was important.

The other thing that helped me particularly, like I mentioned, was watching the debt-free screams. When I was driving an hour to work and an hour back and hearing them, there was times where I had tears in my eyes because I could taste it. I could see it happening. And we knew that when we got debt-free, we wanted to come here. We wanted to come here and we wanted to do our scream because it was important. I think one of the other hardest things is when you have that debt, that takes a while. So that can be a struggle. When you first start and you're paying them off pretty quick and you're scratching them off our sheet, that was pretty easy. But then when you get down to the last bills that take a year or a year or more,

it's like, oh, we've got to stay at it. Joe mentioned one time that there was one day at the house where he was eating bean tacos. Yeah. We stuck to the budget, right? We did a spreadsheet. So we had our grocery, and I'm the one that does the grocery shopping. So I just tried to stick to it.

And one night, opened the pantry, opened the refrigerator, and as she was out of town, I texted her and I said, can we do pizza tonight? All I got back was stick to the budget. So I said, well, okay, what else? So I saw beans and tortillas. I said, you know what? We're going to eat beans and tortillas and cheese curls. They just looked at me like, what? It was easy.

I could have just gone and bought something out, but it stuck to the budget. I think that's where you say, Dave, that we are weird. Yeah, it humbles you. Because other people would question Joe like, why are you doing this? People would question me too. With the income we were making, why are you doing this? What's the point? But again, it was to be here and to be debt free and, you know, to move on to our legacy and what our future is going to be. I'm guessing your mom and dad are pretty proud.

Yes. And my mom and dad are here. They were able to join us today. So we brought them along. And, you know, first and foremost, I want to give thanks to God. But right behind them is my mom and my dad. Because, you know, they sacrificed to start our legacy, to pass our legacy to our kids. Both my mom and dad were migrant workers. So they worked in the fields along with Joe and his parents' parents. So,

you know, that struggle got the hard work to get the sacrifices to where we are now. Now you're making $200 a year. Yeah. That's a generational change right there. It is. And we hope the same will happen to our kiddos. It will. Alright. $172,000 paid off in four years.

Joe, Rosemary, Audra, and Erica, count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one. We're debt-free! Wow! Love it! That's as good as it gets right there, ladies and gentlemen.

Wow! Our scripture of the day, Isaiah 26.3 You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you. Venus Williams said, I don't focus on what I'm up against. I focus on my goals, and I try to ignore the rest. Well, there you go. Judy's with us in York, Pennsylvania. Hi, Judy. How are you? Hi, I'm fine. How about you?

Better than I deserve. How can I help? The usual. Hi, you've got me a little concerned. I started listening to you since Monday. I retired for four years now, five years, I guess. I'm 72 years old. I'm single and own my own house, but have a $22,000 home equity loan on it, which I'm now paying about $1,000 a month on it.

With my pension and my Social Security minus my giving, I'm living on $3,300 a month as it is. But I only have $100,000 in IRAs and you sound like I should be having a lot more than that. And I'm just concerned whether I need to panic about what I'm doing with my activity and my finances or whether I was starting to relax a little bit and also about long-term health and long-term home care insurance, nursing home insurance. Okay. No, I would not panic. You're living on your income without touching the $100,000, right? Right.

Okay. As long as you can do that, you haven't got an issue. And so no need to panic at all. And I think you've got a good goal there of finishing off that little home equity loan. The sooner you get that finished off, the more margin you'll have and the easier it will be to live on what your income is. But your nest egg is not large enough to create much of an income. So it's a good thing that you have the other income. And that's what you're hearing when we're discussing.

You know, you need to have 10 to 12 times the amount you want to live on because it creates, you know, the investment returns create enough for you to live on at that point. But I think you're fine, and definitely you ought to research long-term care insurance. I don't know if it's going to be affordable at 73. It may not be um but uh it obviously in-home care or nursing home is very expensive and um it could crack and scramble the nest egg that you've got without a doubt um the average nursing home stay is a little over two years two and a half years uh on average and it costs, you know, $50,000 a year.

So, you know, it would use up your home and the money that you have saved if you didn't have some long-term care insurance. And so I probably would try to get some in place as long as it's not so expensive that it puts everything else we're doing in jeopardy here. But, no, I don't think there's anything to panic about here, but I do think you have to be very careful. Adam in atlanta hi adam welcome to the dave ramsey show hey buddy how are you doing today better than i deserve what's up i have got uh well really just trying to get some wisdom on a i'm self-employed and last year i I personally built my wife and little girls, built a new house.

I did it and ended up saving a lot of money, and I paid cash for it as I went and finished it out. We've got a very nice house, paid for. Still have the land that it's on. I owe money on that. That's not paid for. But I did pay for the house as I built it, so I didn't have a mortgage on that. Getting back to the self-employed part, I have a business, I guess a vendor, basically called an account due because we had a little discrepancy.

And long story short, they wanted the money in four weeks, and there was no way it was possible. So we're going, just started a lawsuit on it, and I'm trying to figure out would it be better for me to pull out money on my house and pay them or set up the payment terms with them directly rather than, the reason I ask is I'm trying to get this monkey off my back. What's the balance with the vendor? It's about $100,000. Okay.

And what is your business revenue top line in a year? We'll probably do $700,000, $800,000 this year. So why were they not paid? Well, it wasn't not paid. No, you haven't been paying them off. Why are you running a $100,000 balance with them? Well, a lot of that was marketing through an agency with them as well. So a big chunk of that is they billed us monthly for the large chunk of the ad revenue. And why didn't you pay them?

Well, yes and no. It's over a couple-year period, that balance is. So, yes, I take complete fault for the balance, but we did. It wasn't they weren't getting paid. No, I'm not talking about morally. I'm not talking about pissing them off. I'm talking about mathematically. You know, it was just sloppy to let this get to this level.

Right. That's all I'm saying, because you were making enough to clear the thing, and you just, you know, you were holding back and weren't clearing it. So now you've got to clear it in a painful manner. Well, partially, probably some of that had to go with me paying for my house as well and not kind of just misappropriating funds. That's probably overstating it. It's not misappropriating funds.

You were just borrowing from Peter to pay Paul. I got you. Okay. It's not misappropriating funds. You were just borrowing from Peter to pay Paul's all. I got you. Okay. What's a net profit? What's your household income taxable a year? I'll probably do around $200 this year. Okay. So how quick can you pay $100 if you just cash flow it?

I would say realistically, with all my my other bills probably a year and a half yeah they're not going for that yeah uh we haven't gotten to the to the terms yet of it it's kind of just started yeah um so we're just beginning that yeah i don't think they're going to go for that yeah not with you sitting there with assets. I mean. I'm hoping some sort of settlement out of it. Okay. Yeah, I'm thinking a year. Yeah. If you can pay them in a year and cash flow it and they'll go for that,

then I would do that and not mess up your house. How much do you owe on the land? It's in two different sections, but altogether right about 200 grand. And what is the house and all the land worth? The house is probably worth about $400,000. The land is probably right on value, maybe $200,000. It's pretty close to what I owe. I paid a little higher. So you have $600,000 worth of property that you owe $200,000 on?

Yes. Okay. That's what you're telling me. Okay. $400,000 house, then you can put the dirt under it for another $200,000. Exactly. All right. And so, yeah, I'm going to try to put them on a one-year payout, and I'm going to cut

your lifestyle down, and we're going to roll money out of that business towards where it should have been going, which is getting this vendor cleared up, if you can pull that off. I don't think they're going to go for much more than a year. I wouldn't if I were on the other side of this table. I'd force your hand and make you go get a mortgage. I'm not waiting a year on you maybe to pay me unsecured if I'm on the other side of this. So I don't know. It depends on how lightweight they are in their negotiations with you.

But if you can pay them over a year, I would. If they're trying to cram it down where it's going to be two months, you don't have an option. You have to go take out a mortgage at that point. And that's probably going to involve rolling the land into a house mortgage, and it will all be one mortgage. And so you're going to end up with a $300,000 mortgage on $600,000 worth of property, which is not the end of the world. But learn your lesson from it, that you have to cash flow vendors.

You know, an account that runs 31 days is overdue. You cash flow your vendors. And if you don't have your business model set up to where you can anticipate your vendor expenses to clear them every 30 days like this, then you've got a business model that's broken. And you've got to watch that and tighten up on it. And so because you did what a very typical small business mistake here. And you can get yourself in a real bind doing that. The good news is you've got assets and income to address at this time.

So you've got to figure it out from there that this doesn't happen again. So, hey, good question, man. I appreciate you calling in. I hope that helps you. That puts this hour of the Dave Ramsey Show in the books. Our thanks to James Childs, our producer, and Zach Bennett filling in today for Kelly Daniel. I am Dave Ramsey, your host. We'll be back with you before you know it. In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily

with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus. Hey, it's Kelly, associate producer and phone screener for The Dave Ramsey Show. If you would like to do your debt-free scream live on the show, make sure you visit DaveRamsey.com slash show and register. We would love for you to come to Nashville and tell Dave your story.