The Ramsey Show - App - Seven Months Behind on Mortgage…What Do I Do? (Hour 2)

Episode Date: October 23, 2020

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🎵 Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Rental Car Studio, this is the Dave Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and your money. I'm Dr. John Deloney, and I'm here with the smartest man on the Ramsey personality squad, our good friend, Mr. Anthony O'Neal. No, that's a lie. It is not. We are taking your calls on life and money. Give us a call at 888-825-5225.

That's 888-825-5225. And I want to go ahead and correct myself. It is not the Dollar Rental Car Studio. It is the Dollar Car Rental Studio. I'm getting it, James. I'm getting it. To my friends at Dollar Car Rental. You guys are awesome. I love them.

Alright, let's go straight to the phones. Let's go to Lee in Lincoln, Nebraska. Lee, how are we doing? Hey, I'm doing pretty good. Outstanding. How can Anthony and I help? How to handle finances when your spouse has a mental illness. So tell me what's going on. Well, we're already pretty far down the road.

We already sell our house. Our 401K is gone. I went back to work full time. And I thought after the house sale that he'd kind of figure out that he's been living beyond his means but that's not the case and he hasn't filed taxes for two years and so finally this year I filed married but separately just to protect myself but I know he's got a credit card balance and he's going to have his tax issues come up and I'm wondering is there some way to protect what did I've saved what what type of mental illness is he struggle with bipolar 2

okay is he medicated does he take care of us does he take care of himself with a doctor he does I can't say that it seems like it's all good there's a lot of sleeping involved yeah are you are you done with this relationship? Oh, no. So you're fully in? I am, yeah. Okay, so what are you doing to help unify this marriage? And what I mean by that is right now it sounds like you are taking steps to begin protecting yourself, to begin building walls around yourself, and that's why I asked you if the relationship's over. Or are you guys working together to make sure he's getting the right medical care? If what he's, if the care he's

under now isn't working, um, what steps are you taking to support y'all going together and getting the medical care he needs, making sure he's got boundaries in his life, um, that are going to protect the entire family? Well, you know, I can suggest things for him to talk about at his doctor's appointments, but I don't, he has not given me medical permission to speak to his doctor. Okay. So, um, yeah, that's about as far as I can go. Yeah, it is. Um, and, and at the end of the day, working with somebody, being in love with somebody, being connected and being a, a spouse of somebody with bipolar who won't take care of themselves or is unable to take care of themselves and doesn't continue to take care of their medication

and won't go back. That's a, for lack of better terms, that's a nightmare. That's a very challenging situation. You'll have little kids too? We have a teenager who's a couple years away from college and a 10-year-old. Okay. And how are they doing? We're doing okay. I don't think the 10-year-old really understands. It just seems like dad's tired a lot. My teenager understands. Okay. So do you have a group of people in your life that you can count on that will help you be accountable, help you come up with budget plans, help you come up with relational plans? Well, the budget side of things, like I personally am okay. After I filed for taxes, well, even before that,

I split up what was left of our savings, which wasn't a lot. And I just told him I couldn't manage not knowing where his spending would take place. And so I gave him half and I kept half and I just submit to him kind of our monthly expenses that are either hours shared or kids and he has been faithful to pay half of that and that way if he's making personal purchases it's not affecting you know what I what I'm trying to save and do and so I use every dollar and I've got my little I'm on baby cup three and I'm halfway there so So, Lee, you are taking baby steps out of the relationship. Yeah.

Yeah. And I know you're doing it to protect yourself, and I know you love yourself and your kids, and I'm not saying what you're doing is wrong. I'm just telling you, as a neutral guy out here, I'm telling you you're taking steps out of this relationship. Well, wait. I think I respectfully disagree with you, and this is why.

Because I think she said, you know, she said, I'm still in it. And I hear it in her voice that she still loves her husband, right? Yeah. Yeah. So I think, I think, and I'm trying to say the words correctly and respectfully, that since you're saying that you still want to be there, which I am rooting for you. And I am so happy that you still want to be there, which I am rooting for you. And I am so happy that you still want to be there. You have to start making decisions for the both of you, not just for yourself, because if something happens to him, it's going to impact your family. And so what I'm saying is what you got to do is maybe you have to step up to the plate and tell your husband, hey,

moving forward, I'm going to deal with our finances. This is your budget that you have to spend money on. And because of, unfortunately, bae, I love you, and I want to make sure that, you know, we, not I, protect the family. We're going to just, these funds are going to stay over here. I'm going to manage this until we can make sure that you're in a healthier place to help manage the money. Because if he does get audited and if he does get something from the IRS, that's going to impact you and your kids. If someone does come after him for a collection call, that's going to impact you and your kids.

So with that being said, I think you all need to have an every dollar budget. I think you all need to file taxes. If he refused to file taxes, I could be wrong here because I'm not married. So you speak into this, please. I mean, all married couples speak into this, but I'm pretty sure you can still talk to the doctor about your husband. You can't. Okay, cool. Wrong with that one. That's why I'm single. And then as well, we got to figure out how you all both can file taxes, though, as a couple. Yes, but what she's saying is she's choosing to protect her finances there. Lee, you gave me something that was encouraging.

You said that when he is responsible for his stuff, he takes care of it? He pays me for the bills, the half of the bills that I take care of managing those things, and then I just let him know what his half is. But I don't think I'm, I'm not allowed into his finances. I don't have access to what is now his bank account, his credit card account. I don't know truly what he makes, although he's told me ballpark, but I know that he's got credit card debt. You don't know what he makes?

No. I know the ballpark. He took a new job, but I think because he either doesn't want to live the way I do or is now so far into a lot of habits that have spanned many years that he – I'm sure, John, you know that, and I kind of heard this in earlier calls, you have to be careful as a wife how you approach your husband, and there's lots of bad mistakes I've made, so we kind of can't talk about finances. So what I'm going to tell you, Lee, you've got to.

Okay? You have to. If you are now, you're going to have to get with a professional. You're going to have to get with a marriage counselor. You're going to have to get with somebody who will speak truth into both of your lives. And I want to fully tell you, I get it. I've walked alongside folks with bipolar and it's tough, tough, tough,

especially when they won't take their medication. But I've also walked alongside folks with bipolar who are able to make decisions in their life that are positive and beneficial and they have the ability to choose to get well. And it sounds like y'all are living two separate lives. Y'all are living lives as roommates and it sounds like you wantall are living two separate lives. You're living lives as roommates. And it sounds like you want to love this man and you want to stay committed to him.

And what I want to tell you is unless you start working real hard to join back together, and I know that's hard, this relationship is going to continue to fracture. So find somebody you can walk alongside and come together. Okay. We'll be thinking about you. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. You know, I hate to see people waste money, but that's exactly what happens when you buy an identity theft plan that guarantees, quote, you won't become a victim. Well, the reality is you can't prevent identity theft. All these credit monitoring and preventative plans with their fine print guarantees are just a bunch of hype.

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I have it on my family and all my team members. It's the only plan worth buying. Go to Zander.com or call them at 800-356-4282. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. I'm John Deloney. My good friend and co-host Anthony O'Neill. Taking your calls on life and money at 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Let's go to Cesar in Chicago, Illinois.

Cesar, how are we doing this afternoon? Hey, how are you doing, guys? All right. How can we help? Okay, I'm how are you doing, guys? All right. How can we help? Okay, I'm going to try to be brief. I'm sorry. I'm going to try to be brief, and I need some help. I'm in a mess, and I don't know what to do next.

I called Dave about a month ago. I had a $994,000 stamp with the IRS. That's being taken care of right now by one of your LPs. But my issue is that right now I'm seven months behind on my mortgage. And on top of that, I got $45,000 on debt. Now, I don't know what to do after this issue with the IRS gets settled. How do I tackle all of this? What happened, man?

Why are you behind seven months? So at the beginning of the year due to COVID, I took a $20,000 pay cut for my company. I wasn't given the option, but pretty much, you know, I mean, they still kept me in the company, but I needed to take another role, which was that $20,000 pay cut. So on top of that, I owned a rental property and, you know, all renters stopped paying the rent. So I took another pay cut out of that. So, you know, just, I kind of freaked out and I was giving, you know, a chance of a bearish program to delay my mortgage payments. So I took that opportunity just to try to figure out what I was going to do.

In the meantime, so now it's seven months now. I'm a little bit back on my feet. Me and my wife, we kind of got a little I picked up a part-time. She picked up another part-time. We got our income back to roughly

around $86,000 now. $86,000 a year? part-time she picked up another part-time so we got our income back to roughly around 86 000 now 86 a year yeah okay how much is your uh i mean what's your mortgage payment uh 2200 okay all right so you're 16 grand in the hole on your mortgage payments on top of a recurring. Okay. Yes. And as a part of this, this program delay, do they expect a lump sum repayment or do they just bump it to where they're just going to add seven months to the back end of your mortgage? If it's a forbearance. This is the thing. So my six months expire. So I was given the option to delay the mortgage another six months. Uh, so did, just to be safe. But, you know, I have several options, whether it's to go ahead and, you know,

start making payments on this or to try to apply for deferred payment to the end of the loan if I qualify or to figure out, you know, how to pay this more payment in a month. So I'm just a little bit worried because of the tax issue with the IRS hasn't been resolved yet. Dave advised that I should tackle that first before anything else, stop everything that I'm doing. But I, you know,

it's, it's, it's gotten a little bit more complicated with the taxes. It's cost me a lot more money than I anticipated. And I don't know how much is owed yet. Once I get that final number, I don't know where I'm going to go. If I'm going to tackle the taxes, am I going to tackle my mortgage? Yeah, and Dave is right.

That's what I'm having a hard time. So Dave is right. Now, Dave said don't attack the baby steps. No, but what he was saying was not do not make mortgage payments, okay? No, I know that. Yeah, so I want to make sure that that's very clear just even for our callers and so I agree the IRS situation that's big I need you to take care of that here's the problem that I'm having if you're making about seventy two hundred dollars a month gross this means that you bring home about maybe five

fifty fifty five hundred dollars a month net correct that? That's correct. Yeah. With the $2,200 mortgage, you're near 40 to 45% with your mortgage. And that's a lot. So to me, you're a little over your head as far as in your income. I would suggest looking at possibly selling the house and maybe downsizing, maybe to rent something for a little while, giving your wife some time to get back on your feet and to get a bigger down payment down and get into a house that's 25% of your net pay. Check this out. Not your income on your rental properties, not your income on extra things. No. What do you know you have coming in and go from there? Because right now with seven months behind and then you're deferring it again,

yeah, you can look at deferring it until the end of your loan, but you're still gonna have that $2,200 mortgage payment and you're only bringing home about $5,500, $5,400. And so you're really riding a tough line. So I'm looking at, okay, how can me and my wife reset? And there's nothing wrong with downsizing. There's nothing wrong with realizing, all right, we need to downsize a little bit, get back on our feet.

We can attack the taxes because that's priority right now. We don't need any garnishments on our income. We don't need anything like that right now that would add more stress. So I would look into that on seeing what can you do to sell the home, to get out of that. Now, the rental property, that's another conversation. Are the renters back to paying you yet? I actually live in the rental property. Oh.

So I bought this property four years ago, so I wanted a DIY. I wanted something. I'm pretty handy. I wanted something tackle, a project. I went over my head. My money was gone in no time. So it's a three unit. It's a three flat.

So I'm living in one of these units uh i had uh roughly nine hundred dollars per unit so two units coming in the rent yeah so last year i decided to renovate one of the units and i got her completely out so that that income stopped coming in so i still have one unit still being rented out which is about roughly ten thousand a year so that's the one that they stopped for you know the beginning of March when the whole pandemic started. And are they back to paying? Yeah, they just recently started paying again. Okay, cool.

And will you be able to get the other unit rented out within the next 30 to 60 days? I'm stuck here because that unit right now, it's in bones. I mean, there's nothing in there. I mean, I have to put about $20,000 to $30,000 to try to get it back up. But my income will boost because instead of renting it for like $900,

rent has gone up a lot in the area, so I can get easily like $1,300 for that unit. So right now, what it sounds like, Cesar, is you're just living above your means right now, man, and you're hoping that someone else will come in there and live off of it. The thing that we recommend is this is why we suggest doing a cash when you're doing investments. Now, this is your priority.

But even if it was your main home, for example, right, and you want to rent out the other two, you need to be able to handle this all on your own with no issues. And it sounds like you're banking on someone else. So you're in a tough situation. You know, for me, you know, I'm looking at selling the unit, missing out on making some money so I can get back on my feet, get a fully funded emergency fund up, get out of this IRS issue. And then I'm going to go back and go on ahead and look into some possible things in the future. Or you can look at deferring it. If you get it deferred, you're just going to be living paycheck to paycheck, man, for a long time. And that's not what I want you to do.

It sounds to me, Anthony, like our friend Cesar here is broke. And until he has that realization, he's going to try to continue to duct tape together a current lifestyle, the current place, the current this, the current dream. Well, making $7,100, he's not broke. But what he is doing, he's doing exactly. Living way over his head. Yes, exactly. He's not really creating a cushion and margin in his life to live a comfortable, financial, peaceful life.

And so we see this all the time. We see people get their mortgage or their rent payments right around in between $40 to up to, sometimes I've seen up to about 55 percent of their take home pay. And then when something happens like COVID, when something happens like an unexpected emergency, they're stressed. And so what I want for him is like, hey, I don't want you to lose your dream. But I do want you to understand that sometimes you got to step back when you have a rubber band and you want to swing that thing over there for yards, you got to pull that rubber band back so it can go a lot further. If I just hold the rubber band right here and let it go, it's going to

drop straight down. That's right. And that's what's happening to him right now. I feel as if he needs to pull himself back a little bit. So that way when he pulls himself back and he lets himself go, he's going to go further than where he is today. And launches, that's right. Exactly. Anthony, you're wise. I'm not wise's right. Exactly. Anthony, you're wise. I'm not wise.

I just work with Dave. You're wise. You're wise. Caesar, you got what you paid for on that one. It's a good man, Anthony O'Neal. This has been the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you. This is the Dave Ramsey Show, and I'm John Deloney with my good friend Anthony O'Neill. The Blinds.com's 100% satisfaction guarantee means even if you mismeasure or pick the wrong color, they'll remake your blinds for free.

You get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you'll save even more. Use promo code RAMSEY to get the best deal. Rules and restrictions apply. Today's question comes from Lynette in Minnesota. My 31-year-old stepson moved in with us last November. He worked as an internal auditor in the past. He has not been able to find a job. He's had a few interviews but no offers,

and I'm frustrated because he doesn't do much around here, but we provide three meals and a lower level of the house for him. His dad has been helping him out with living expenses. I think he is too comfortable here, and there's no reason to find work and leave. What do you recommend that we do so we can go back to being empty nesters? Kick him out. Kick him out. Here's a cool thing you can do.

Be parents. Make adult decisions. Lynette, you know the answer. You've made life too comfortable. As our friend Dr. Henry Cloud says, your son has no problems. He's got free rent. He's got free food. He's got a warm, safe place to stay with his mommy and his daddy.

And he's got no reason to go look for work. None. Not one little bit. So you can kick him out. You can give him rules. You can make him pay rent. You can say, I'm not going to feed you anymore. You can do any number of things that are about setting boundaries

and deciding we want to be empty nesters. Our kids are grown. They're in their 30s, and it's time for us to return to our bliss of empty nesting. So it's a decision Lynette. John, you're spending too much time and you're being too kind.

He's 31 years old. Give him 31 days, find a job and you have to go. You put the pressure on this grown man and let him know you have 31 days because you're 31 so we're going gonna give you an extra day one day per year right one day per year get a job he can he can start driving for uber today

he can start delivering pizza today so there's no excuse to why this grown man cannot have a job and do something to go towards his life. So if you really want to be M.T. Nestor's, do what my daddy did when I was 19. Not 31, not 25 when I was 19. You are out. Bye. And that grew me up fast. Yep.

And I knew exactly what I had to do to become a young man. And here's the thing. And let's jump on some phone calls. We're spending too much time on this question it's an easy answer oftentimes we see too many uh boys i call them grown boys in a grown man's body because and the parents are teaching them it's okay to have a boy mindset and to act like a child in a grown man's body or grown woman's body and so if you want to make sure that your your son and forget about you being empty nesters no it's your it's your son you're hurting your child yeah it's your son it's your kick him out goodbye bye bye my son is not staying in my house past 25 i'm gonna tell you that right now he graduated from college.

He's got one year to come home. After that, goodbye. He's got one year globally. One year. If you graduate at 20, you got to 21. Goodbye. I love it. Let's go to Lydia in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

Lydia, how are we doing? Hi. How are you guys? I'm doing great. I'm so excited to talk to the both of you. Thank you so much for everything you do. You betcha. How can we help today? Okay, so last one, my husband and I just got out of debt.

We're debt-free, $14,000 in seven months. I'm so excited. So, basically, I am working to be a professional actor and i'm so excited that like both of you are on today and a huge thank you to dave um i am calling to get your advice um i'm following my passion uh this is something that it makes me happy. And basically I'm doing everything on my end. I even started like writing and producing my own short films. I'm dealing with a lot of like fear, you know, the COVID hit and I'm not getting a lot of like acting opportunities.

And I'm looking for an agent and like I'm I'm basically ready to like up and move like if I get signed on with an agent but I'm just like dealing with a lot of fear and anxiety about like will I ever get another job you know or will I have to like you know keep producing my own films and that's like you know can be like you know a keep producing my own films. And that's like, you know, can be like, you know, a financial task in itself. And so, so, so how can we help you, Lydia? Well, um, I'm really, I guess I'm really just like looking for like some like encouragement and advice like in regards to like you know keeping keeping moving forward and i know uh i know dr john you talk a lot about uh people pursuing their passions and so i'm really just looking for like like yes so if you're looking for encouragement if you're looking for encouragement anthony i are

going to tell you go get them we hope it works out well for you that's us encouraging so a couple of things you mentioned here number one um going for your passion is good so is paying rent so is eating right yes and knowing the difference between working towards a career, being passionate about art, and wanting to be famous. Those are all different things. If you love acting and you love filmmaking and you love writing, then keep making your own shorts. Keep making your own films.

Keep sending them out to everyone in the world. You are creating art in a snapshot in history when you can put it up on the internet and have people from all over the world see it at the push of a button it's never been done before in the history of the world if you want to be famous and you want to make it quote unquote the big time which is never what people think it is then you're in for seasons of rejection you're in seasons of hard hard hard work that nobody sees you're in for seasons of rejection. You're in seasons of hard, hard, hard work that nobody sees. You're in seasons of writing your own scripts over and over, and they're going to stack up in piles, new scripts, short scripts, feature scripts that no one will ever read because you're practicing.

You're going to take every acting gig you can. You're going to do scene reads with your husband at your house trying to improve your craft. And you have to recognize you're in the middle of a pandemic and the entire industry just flat shut down overnight for a while. And so it's all of that all at once. And so you're going to have to really ask yourself, why do you want to act? Why do you want to create art? Why do you want to create film? Do you have a voice? Do you have something you want to say? Do you want to bring joy and humor to the world or scary movies? What is the thing that you want to do? And then you're going to have to look for every single opportunity to do it. What's your YouTube channel? So my website, it's LydiaLeanne.com. Okay, but what's your YouTube channel?

It's Live Create. Okay, so it's YouTube. L I V E C R E. And then it's the number eight. Okay, cool. So you have one. So I just want to make sure you have one. Cause I think like what he was saying in today's day and time is, you know,

if you really want to be an actor, you got to build your own fan base on YouTube because your actors, not your actors, but your agents want to see if you have your own fan base. So I would highly suggest that you have a job. You pursue your job while you're building your fan base and you're in seeing what your fan base is saying. So I don't know if you have a job right now, but that's why I asked the question,

you know, do you have a YouTube? Do you have an Instagram? Are you utilizing social media to see if people actually like what you're doing? And while you're doing. And while you're doing this, you're working for an actual job. And you're working with writers.

You are having folks that you Zoom with once a week to review each other's scripts. You're doing scene reviews. You are doing anything and everything to grow your craft, to grow your crowd, and to get better and better at this. And then when you have the opportunity to sit down with an agent and those those interviews are sometimes rare they're sometimes quick you're able to say like anthony said here's this here's this here's this here's all my crafts here's all my shorts here's all of the crowd i've already established on my own you really want me in your films absolutely and now you're off to the race and you really want to be a conversation and i asked that because my brother-in-law does that.

And he has already two offers with my siblings. Not my siblings, but my nieces and nephews. Because he built a YouTube and a social media world. There you go. Love it. Go get it, Lydia. You got our full support. We hope it goes well for you.

Grind it out and grind it out and keep working on your craft. Absolutely. Good for you. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. if you're like me drive time has become podcast time and if you listen to podcast too you're gonna love this the brand new ramsey network app is like a podcast player with all of our shows in one place this is how you get better in every area of your life. We're talking about the Dave Ramsey Show, the Chris Hogan Show, Rachel Cruz, Ken Coleman, Christy Wright, Entree Leadership, and the Borrowed Future Podcast, my new show, all of it,

all in one place. You can browse by topic, save your favorite clips, and share them with your friends. Get better in every area of your life, from your money to your career to your business. Never again should you struggle to find the education and empowerment you need to improve your life. Download our Ramsey Network app today in the App Store. Just search for Ramsey Network. All right, let's go to Michael in Kansas City, Missouri. Michael, how are we doing? Oh, I'm doing all right. How are you? Outstanding.

How can we help you today? Well, the thing is, I've been bouncing like warehouse job to warehouse job. I'm 27 years old with no marketable skills for a career, and I've got $13,000 in debt, and I don't know where to start with anything. Hold on, Michael. You have no marketable skills.

Who told you that? I have. Myself, really. Why would you tell yourself that? Well, you know, I look around and see all my friends and family doing pretty well for themselves, and I feel just kind of stuck and don't know where to go. What do you want to do? I really don't know.

That's the problem. It's a me problem. What brings you joy, Michael? When you look at the picture, the imaginary picture you've painted for yourself, what's that look like? Well, I guess the one thing that really brings me joy is vehicles. Okay. Tell me about it. I guess when I was like 14 or 15, my dad and I were restoring a car together.

Did you get it restored? Yeah, we did. It was an 87 Suzuki Samurai. Good memories with your old man? Yeah. Are you good at working on cars? I'm embarrassing about it, Anthony. I'm terrible at it.

Yeah, me too. That's why I pay people to do it. That's exactly right. That's why people like you are important in guys like me and Anthony's life, Michael. So what's stopping you from getting online there in Kansas City, Missouri, finding a place where you can take some classes on how to work on cars and getting your hands dirty? Nothing.

Never really thought about it that way. Michael, do you ever sit back and just ask yourself, like, where am I going? Because I see that you you pay attention to your peers and your family members around you but are you paying attention to yourself do you look at yourself in the mirror do you wake up and talk to yourself i think right now um the reason why you're feeling overwhelmed is because you're not making yourself a priority and you're not making yourself really priority and you're not making yourself really sit down and focus on your life because at 27 years old you're still young but you're

still young enough to understand okay here are my strengths here are my weaknesses um here's what i can do you are marketable but you're only marketable based upon what you believe in yourself so i believe you don't even believe in your own self and your own capabilities. And so I think what you need to do to get started is really sit down and just think about your life, where you're going. Identify what are your strengths? What do you really like doing? Not just what you're passionate about, but what are you good at doing? Are you good with your hands? Are you good with reading? Are you good with talking? Are you good with thinking

through problems? What are your strengths? Mash that with your passions. And then what I want you to do, I want you to write down this website right now. I'm going to have you stay on the line when John and I get done with you. I'm going to have Kelly give you a copy of Ken Coleman's book, The Proximity Principle, because he really helps you understand how to plan and really get the job that you need and get into the career field that you really, really want. And he walks you through the whole process of your passion, your needs, your skills, all that type of good stuff

that I think right now for you and where you are in life will be a great, great, great fit. But let me tell you this much. You're going to always feel this way if you do not sit down and really think about, okay, where am I going in life? You have to stop. And I'm going to be honest with you on the show today. I'm going to be vulnerable. I'm going to be very vulnerable. I have to even stop looking at the other personalities because when I look at other personalities, I'm like, well, I should be doing that or other people. I need to be doing this. I have to start focusing more on me, I need to be doing this.

I have to start focusing more on me and you have to do that too. Cut off your family members for a little bit. Cut off IG for a little bit. Cut off looking at other people for a little bit and just focus on yourself and then you'll start feeling excited. You'll start having clarity about where you're going. When you start reading this book from Ken Comey,

you'll be like, yo, okay, this is me. And if you can focus on you for the next 90 days, I promise you, you won't feel overwhelmed. You will know where you need to start and you will see your future turning around. Do you hear that, Michael? Yeah, I'm here. Did you hear what Anthony just said? Yeah, I've got it wrote down, and that's good advice. Outstanding. Something I never really thought about before. And here's one more thing I want you to do. I want you to get an index card, and I want you to, for the next 90 days,

we're going to be a 90-day challenge, and you know where to find us. Our phone is 888-825-5225. I want you to call us back in 90 days. Absolutely. I want you to get that index card,. I want you to call us back in 90 days. I want you to get that index card and I want you to create just for Michael a morning routine that you will stick to

for three months because it's going to start with this idea that Michael is worth investing in. And it's going to start with, I'm going to go for a walk in the morning. I'm going to have a gratitude journal. I'm going to take a few minutes and just say, I'm grateful for these two or three or four things. And then it's going to say, I'm going to have a gratitude journal. I'm going to take a few minutes and just say, I'm grateful for these two or three or four things. And then it's going to say, I'm worth the following,

and here's what I'm doing to invest in myself. And that might be going to classes. That might mean meeting with a mentor. That might mean reading Ken's book again. That might mean any number of things. But it starts with you investing a little bit in yourself every day, and it starts with you talking better to yourself about yourself you know the greatest enemy to our success is our distractions and is our excuses and i think some

of our distractions comes from our loved ones our peers social media we see everyone else winning we see everyone else uh succeeding in certain areas that we want to succeed in. And so it makes us discount who we other people distractions doing. And that's just something that I have to remind myself every single day, seeing other personalities out there in the world who are winning in spaces. I got to go, Anthony, focus on you, focus on your calling, focus on what you are passionate about doing and just focus there. Don't don't worry focus there. Don't worry about them. Don't worry about John. Don't worry about Chris Hogan. Don't worry about this person.

Don't worry about that person. Focus on you. And when you really do that, man, it just feels so refreshing to do that. But this and these days and times, man, we we want to blend in with the Joneses. You know, we want to we want to see what they're doing. Oh, I need to be doing that no you need to be where you are they could be on stair number 10 but if you're still number one appreciate stair number one because if you get to stair number 10 you don't know what they did to

get up there you don't know the hurdles you don't know how many uh toes they broke knees they broke backs they broke to get up there. And you don't know. So appreciate where you are. Learn where you are. Improve where you are. So when you do get to level 10, when you do get that success, when you do become debt-free, you can handle that season that you're in and continue to grow. That's right.

I can't tell you how often I get distracted. And you know this, Anthony, better than most. I've been pretty open with you. I didn't have social media before. You didn't? I didn't know any of this stuff. And it is unbelievable how much the comparison game lodges itself in your soul when you live in it. It does.

And every day, my biggest distraction is comparison. It is. And our friend Rachel and Christy, they're always telling us, guys, comparison is the thief of joy, man. It will steal it out from under you. They've got this. They've got this. She's got that. And I'm telling you right now, you've got to get focused on where you want to be, what you want to do, who you're going to help serve.

And then you've got to get a group of people that will walk alongside you. Turn the blinders off. When we compare ourselves to other people, we tell God, who created us, my belief, that we do not appreciate Him making us. That's the last thing I want to do. That wraps up another hour of TDRS with John Deloney

and my good friend Anthony O'Neill. We'll see you soon. This has been The Dave Ramsey Show. This is James Childs, producer of The Dave Ramsey Show. Once again, you made The Dave Ramsey Show one of the top four most popular podcasts last year. To get your daily dose of motivation and inspiration from the Ramsey Network, subscribe or follow today wherever you listen to podcasts.