The Ramsey Show - App - Should I Work Less to Spend More Time With My Sick Wife? (Hour 2)

Episode Date: September 9, 2020

Education, Savings, Career, Debt, Relationships Tools to get you started:  Debt Calculator: http://bit.ly/2QIoSPV Insurance Coverage Checkup: http://bit.ly/2BrqEuo Complete Guide to Budgeting: http://bit.ly/2QEyonc Interview Guide: http://bit.ly/2BuGnZE Check out other podcasts in the Ramsey Network: http://bit.ly/2JgzaQR 

Music Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studio. This is the Dave Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and your money. My name is Anthony O'Neill. Joining me this hour and hosting with me is the number one, number one YouTube podcast doctor in the world. Dr. John Deloney is in the building with me today. How are you doing this afternoon, sir? Good. I like the imaginary accolades. I'll take them. Imaginary?

I repeat those to myself over and over and over. Your name is Dr. John, right? Correct. Correct. And you do have a YouTube show, correct? I do. And you just launched your podcast as John, right? Correct. And you do have a YouTube show, correct? I do. And you just launched your podcast as well, correct? Correct. And it is number one in your category, correct?

It launched number one. I had a good first week. You had a good first week. There you go. Okay, then. I'm going to take it. I'm telling the truth here. I still talk to my mom every day about it.

It's good. How about you, man? I saw you did a a youtube segment the other day on failure tell me about that oh man you know um one of the things that i'm really teaching young people in this generation is to accept failing um and one of the things that i've taught myself is it's okay to fail it's okay to try something and if it sucks it sucks you know one thing that i've learned when i fail i learn when i learn i improve when i improve i grow and when i grow i fail again right because i want to learn so i can improve so i can continue to grow and i think this generation

and not just this generation i think a lot lot of people, we are scared of failure. We're scared of something not working right. We're scared of something not looking right. And honestly, I really I don't want to fail on purpose, but I do want to fail so I can know what not to do again. And I think the failure to scare to the fear of failing prevents a lot of people from building wealth to creating the platform that they want to create to creating their family they want to create and so for me I just want to have a conversation so

that's over on my YouTube show man thanks for chiming in about that I totally forgot about that show it was doing so well yeah it's doing great and when I saw it I had an idea about I mean just what I'm experiencing in my own house, the challenges with homeschooling, the challenges of school starting and then not starting and then trying to figure it out. And there's these relational fears too, right? Yeah.

My wife is a PhD in education. She's brilliant. She's an award-winning teacher. And it's hard to teach your own kids sometimes yes and so yes i've recognized in my own house there's a there's a there may be a fear of hey i don't want to tell my husband that i'm struggling with this or i come home and i'm you know doing a podcast and stuff i don't come home and say hey i'm nervous about this right and so i'm fear uh i've got fear of failing in my relationships i've got fear of failing and these are old relationships

man i'm an old married man. And still, every day those fears surface. And so I don't even think, I think you're right. I don't think it's just millennials. I think everybody is struggling with, what, I try something new. My business is changing. My relationships at home are changing.

And we just got to say, I'm going to jump in with both feet. I know I'm going to fall down and fail. I know I'm going to screw up. That's how I'm going to learn. I'm going to be in a, and relationships I know I'm going to fall down and fail. I know I'm going to screw up. That's how I'm going to learn. I'm going to be in a... Relationships are going to be grace. Help me, pick me back up. Forgive me, pardon me, and then we're going to go do it again, do it again, do it again.

Yes, I love it. I love it, man. I love it. Well, thanks for putting that out there, man. No, for sure, for sure. Well, if you have some concerns about failing, if you have questions about your money, about your debt, about your business, about your mind, hey hey give us a call 888-825-5225 888-825-5225 kelly um is on the phone so phone lines are now open uh dr d and

myself will be here for this whole hour having a conversation with you about your life your money um whatever you want to talk about, give us a call. So let's go ahead and go out to Virginia and have a conversation with John. John, good afternoon. How can Dr. D and I serve? Good afternoon, Lewis. Good to talk to you. Yeah, man.

Yeah. How can we help? Hey, I got a quick question. I've been lucky. I'm on step six. Hey, hold on real quick, John. Hold on quick, John. You say you're lucky or you've worked really hard

and made some good decisions and picked yourself back up when you fell down. Well, I'm not alone. My wife and I have made some good decisions. We've shown her what I call it. Of course, luck is a part of it, but I want you to own your blessing and your hard work too, right? That's true. Thank you. All right. There you go. All right.

Continue. We're both in our early 50s and we have an 18 year old son who's a senior in high school we saved for his college we've got about a hundred thousand dollars in his account and he's been appointed to one of the military academies okay so i had a question about his money um great, always done the right thing. I want a car too. And do I put that money into an investment account for him? Or do we invest that money

in something else? Now, is his school paid for? So did he get a scholarship? Or is the Army paying for it? Well, it's a military... He's in the military academy, so they pay for everything. They pay for everything, yeah. Hey, what an accomplishment, and kudos to you and your family and your child, man.

That's really remarkable. That's awesome. Yeah. So here's the thing. You have an option because I'm pretty sure your son still needs some money, too, to live off of. So you have two options. You can flip that over and put it into like a roth ira anything if you want to there or um i forgot the name of it you can reach

out to the school get a letter from the school and you can withdraw whatever the uh cost of school is for that semester so say for an example prime example is it's fifteen thousand dollars for that semester well you can withdraw that from your 529 college fund without any taxes without any penalties because that was going towards college so you have to talk to your smart best of pro and they'll get you all the proper paperwork if you want to do that and your son can still use that to maybe pay for some of his school expenses that are not covered up on the program. But like eating, if he decides to live off campus one day or you can go ahead and invest that into a Roth IRA. Either options are good. But if your son can get through four years, it's a five yearyear program. A five-year program, yeah, of without touching that money at all. I honestly do enjoy and really like the idea of just going ahead

and flipping that over and investing that money so that way he can have something go ahead and start working towards his retirement, John. It's a four-year college degree, but it's a five-year military commitment. Yes, yes. And so at the end of nine years, he would have whatever we invested. Yes. And I just don't want him to be afraid to work, which he is not.

I assure you they will take all fear of work out of him at the military academy. Oh, yeah, yeah. He's going to have to work, especially even in the military, for the five years that he's committed to the program. So, man, congratulations on that, John. You and your wife have raised, it sounds like a very smart young man. I love the fact of going ahead and just getting on the phone with a smart investor pro and just saying, okay, how can we move our college fund over to a growth stock mutual fund

so this way we can go ahead and have this invested into him down the road. I mean, from there, man, that's just, that's awesome. I mean, but congratulations. Tell your son to look me up on YouTube because his future is looking so, so bright. Man. Woo-hoo! 888-825-5225. It's Dr. D and myself here on the Dave Ramsey Show, taking your questions.

Give us a call. Folks, I love telling you about well-made, well-thought-out products. Today, I'm talking about Grip6 belts. I don't know about you, but I'm not a fan of traditional belts. They never fit right, and they're uncomfortable. Grip 6 belts are unique. Owner BJ designed a truly modern, minimalist belt made of high-quality materials with no holes, no flap, and no bulk. And the buckles come in really cool designs and are interchangeable. I personally own these belts in different styles, and talk about affordability, GRIP6 belts come with a lifetime guarantee.

And that means if you no longer like or fit the style of your belt, you can replace them for free. Plus, I like the way these guys do business. GRIP6 is determined to help build and modernize American manufacturing. To learn more and get this month's Dave Ramsey special, visit GRIP6.com. That's GRIP6.com. Going out to Austin, Texas, we're going to have a phone call and conversation here with Chance. Chance, good afternoon.

How can Dr. D and I help? Hey, I just have a simple question. My wife and I, we're four years into our marriage. We've got a two-year-old boy. And ever since day one, I guess even before we were married, we've been saving to be able to build a house one day, and we're up a little bit above $200,000. We have about $30,000 in our emergency budget,

and we don't know should we be doing more with the $200,000 than just putting it in a CD, or what should we do as far as risk versus reward. Now, what are you doing with this $200,000 and just putting it in a CD or what should we do as far as risk versus reward? Now, what are you doing with this $200,000? Are we looking to purchase a home? We want to build one day, yeah. You want to build. Do you know when you want to build?

We're probably looking about four to five years. Okay, cool. Great. And you want to pay cash for it? Because $200,000 is a lot of money, especially in Austin, Texas. So I'm guessing what in four or five years you want to go ahead and just drop a half a million and just build a home cash.

Well, we're, we're figuring somewhere around three to three, 350 is what we're. Okay. All right. Sounds good. So here's the thing.

You want to keep that liquid. I want you to part that into like a money market account, or you can do what I do is part that on an online savings account to where I can get a little bit more interest, a little bit more return. You don't want to lock it up. You don't want to put it into some type of investment account, retirement account, because can go online which i suggest and which in which what i do is going ahead and just do a high yielded savings account dr d and you'll get anywhere between one and like 1.5 right now money market accounts like 0.7 to one one right now so what are the cd rates are they pretty low uh cd rates i don't do cd rates i don't do cds you know Those are just called certificates of depreciation. It doesn't really go anywhere for me.

CDs, it's just a piece of paper. Yep. And so, honestly, when it comes to purchasing a home for a down payment, you want to keep it liquid. Gotcha. Cool. So that way, whenever – let's say, example he didn't he doesn't have a house today but let's say he comes across something on january that he likes for a great deal that he has the cash liquid to make that move if he locks it up i mean it's just it's just gonna be a lot lot

there so uh we don't do cds we don't do bonds we don't do none of that uh we just sit here for especially for savings and purchasing a home. We sit here and we just put it into a money market account. Cool. Love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

Hey, this next phone call. Yes. Let's go to Hawaii and have a conversation here with Eric. Eric, good afternoon. How can Dr. D and I help? Hey, guys. Hey, so I just had a question. I've been married for a year.

I'm 28 and my wife's 26, and she has sickle cell anemia. So I'm working. I'm the only one that's working in the household. She gets like a small disability check. So I'm working like one part-time job and then another part-time job. And then I, I'm trying to do this other thing too, just to like help us get by. But my wife is really wanting me to like spend more time at home because she feels like her health is getting worse and I'm wasting my time trying to pay off our debt.

So your extra jobs that you're taking, I know Honolulu, I know Hawaii's been just beat up really bad with the tourism industry shutting down. So are you working a couple of part-time jobs on top of a full-time jobs to pay off debt? Or are you working a couple of part-time jobs to keep the lights on and milk in the fridge? Yeah, so I have like one part-time job during the day. It's like 32 hours, four or or five days and then in the mornings i do this paper out and then that's like just enough and it goes along with like our plan to

like trying to pay down this debt like her her car payment and then we have like 2000 and uh credit cards that i'm like super anxious to get to get paid off sure eric let me ask you this question eric yeah what's more important your wife your marriage or making more money to pay debt off quickly? My wife is more important. I love your hustle. You called into the Dave Ramsey show. So we love hearing people say, I want to do this.

I want to do that. I want to do this so I can get out of debt. Absolutely. But we would never sit here and tell you that paying off debt fast is more important than being there and walking this journey and spending time with your wife. I don't know what the future holds for your wife tomorrow, but I do know something. She's here today and your wife needs you more than that, than to build collectors. I'm not saying to stop working. I'm not saying to stop going out to the journey,

but what I am saying is start spending more time with your wife. Okay. And have the conversation with them and say, Bay, what does that look like for you yeah i love i love that anthony i love the idea of saying sit down and imagining a plan together because the phrase more time can become endless yeah and the phrase um i just need you around i just need you present i need you here um Sometimes that's a matter of attention and

a matter of focus less than it is a matter of, I just want your body sitting in this house. Right? So I think me and Anthony just nailed it. I think sitting down with your, with your wife and telling her that you love her and you know, she's in pain, you know, she's hurting and she's struggling, feeling lonely. And at the same time, you guys have some math problems that you have to deal with. Come up with a solution that y'all co-create together, work on this together. What is me being around and home and honoring you? And at the same time, trying to hustle and grind it too. Um, and help her be a part of the tangible solution there. Not just the amorphous more, more, more. And as Anthony says, man, you get one wife, you get one marriage, you get one,, you get one you, and finding that balance

between what your responsibilities are and that anxiety you have about that $2,000 credit card versus your wife's anxiety of missing you and feeling like she's not a priority around home. That's just a messy, tough situation. So I love the idea of having that conversation. I think that's wise. And correct me if I'm wrong, Dr. D, because you're married. You're the doctor.

You're the expert in this field. Give Eric what are the first two questions he should ask when he sits down with his wife? How does he set this up properly to where she feels as if she will be heard and that he sees her value and he understands her. So I think the first question is not a question. I think the first thing is a statement that says, I hear you and I love you. And then he's going to ask a question, which is, help paint me a picture. What does time with you look like? What am I not delivering here?

What is going to make you feel connected and whole? And just listen. And then don't try to solve it. A lot of folks try to hop in and be like, well, you know, I'm really – just stop, right? And then what Eric's going to find out is, is his wife being hard on him? Is he trying to distract himself from her pain by going and getting more work

and more busy and creating outside goals that are his goals and not their goals, right? But just starting that conversation with I love you and I hear you and I want to be there for you.

Dude, I can hear his voice. Yeah. He loves his wife. He loves his wife. And he hates to hear her hurting and he also hates the debt. Maybe they need to sell the car. They may need to make some

other sacrifices financially that they haven't considered before because they thought he could just work it off and i've been guilty in my own life of hiding of getting addicted to being busy and using those goals busyness goals and hiding goals as reasons to not sit with some of my loved ones pain right now i think the very first not i think i know the very first ministry any man has is his family that's the priority everything else after your family after your wife after your husband after your kids i come second and so america hear us clearly we want you to get out of, but we also want you to keep your family. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, guys.

At the Dave Ramsey Show, we really value your input. It helps us to know what's important to you so we can deliver relevant content to help you crush your money goals. We just launched a brand new survey, and we'd love your feedback. It only takes a few minutes and you'll be entered to win a 100 amazon gift card no purchase necessary take the survey at DaveRamsey.com slash survey or text survey to 33 789 going out to Cleveland Ohio we're going to have a conversation here with uh brendan brendan good afternoon how can dr d and i help hey guys thanks for taking my call my wife and i are uh

we're working on baby step two we're trying to get our debt paid off and currently besides the house we have fifty six thousand dollars in debt. About 19 and a half of that is in between two credit cards, and the other $36,000 is between two cars. Okay. Currently, my estimated payoff date isn't until December 2024, but I actually just registered for school to use my GI Bill as a veteran, which will pay me a housing allowance also. So if I include all of that money towards the debt, it's still not until March of 2023 for the debt payoff date. I'm just wondering if there's something else that I can be doing to try and get that paid off sooner. Maybe even using the funds in my 401k. No, if that was something that would work. No, no, no, no no no no we don't touch retirement plans brother

okay one of the key things that i'm always telling people is patience hard work dedication and patience um you know it it it's unfortunately here's the truth it took you no time to get in it but it's going to take you a little bit of time to get out of it. Let's walk through the process here because 2023 sounds far, but it's not that far. What's your household income right now? I'm the only one working. On my base salary, I make about $80,000 a year, but I travel for work and I get a lot of travel benefits. It's often over six figures. I just don't have an exact amount. 80K a year, and your total day out is what again? I'm sorry, what was that? Your total debt again?

$56,209. Okay, $56K in debt. All right. Your cars, what kind of car do you have? I drive a 2017 Nissan Rogue, and my wife has a 2016 Kia Sorento. Okay, 2016 Kia Sorento. Do you have any cash in the bank right now? We have the $1,000 emergency fund from Baby Step One, but that's it at the moment. Okay, so we've got $1,000 in savings. All right, that's good.

So you're following the system. Now, this Rogue, how much is the Rogue worth? I am not exactly sure. When I bought it about two years ago, it was actually sold for $1,500 below Blue Book, but I've had it two years and I've been in two fender benders that weren't my fault and both bumpers actually need to be repaired. So I would imagine it's going to be lower on book value now. All right. So here's the thing, Brandon. How old are you and your wife? I am 31. She's 28. Okay. 31, 28, 28. Okay, cool. Two sharp millennials. The very first thing here, what we're going to do, and Dr. D, I want to get your thoughts on this as well. I want you and your

wife to sit down tonight. Before the end of this week, I want you all your wife to sit down tonight before the end of this week. I want you all to come up with a clear vision to why you want to get out of debt. And I don't want to say, you know, I want to get out of debt so I can do this. No, no, no. Get deep. If you follow me and everyone who's listening right now, no, I like to get deep. When you ask it, when you answer the question, why ask yourself why again? And then ask yourself why again? Because I think the very first thing is you need is a clear vision that you and your wife can stick to.

OK, whatever that vision is, you stick to that. The number two, you just go ahead and work the debt snowball, which is babysat. Number two, you already done babysat. Number one, which is a thousand dollar emergency fund. Babysat number two is pay off all your debt using the debt snowball okay so you got two credit cards you're going to pay those off you got your car notes you're going to pay those off now you have two cars that you can honestly speed up some stuff bro if you sell those cars brandon and just go buy two cash cars. So I wouldn't have a problem with you for an example.

So, you know what? For the next two, two months, Bay, you and I, we're going to just just stack up some extra cash. We're going to put away five, you know, six, seven grand. And we're going to buy two cash cars and sell these cars so that way we can get out of debt sooner. Pay off this 14, 14 15 000 in credit card debt we can honestly be debt free by next summer if we really work this thing correctly and then the rest of next year we can save up more cash to go buy newer vehicles you see what i'm saying brandon okay okay so that's if i'm you i'm having a conversation with my wife i'm getting getting a clear vision. And then once we get the clear vision, we're going to work backwards.

We're going to write down all the baby steps. We're going to write down, OK, what can we do to get there? Hey, Bay, are you cool with us selling these cars? Yes, Bay, I want to get out of debt. OK, cool. Let's sell these cars. But the next two months, let's make all the minimum payments on this stuff. Let's stack a little bit of cash so we can buy a cash car. Now we're out of debt of about, yeah, I mean, a lot of money there. Then now we could be out of debt really if you work the system with your 80K a year. John, I mean, they could be out of debt probably by February of next year. I know, and my close friends who are in the military, they love their cars.

They really do. They love their cars. They really do. They work their cars. They really do. They work their butts off. They like driving nice things. And you're right, man. You can unload a big chunk of this debt real quick. Even if you're upside down and you've got to take out a small gap loan there,

you still find yourself in a much better situation. Almost half, right? And then, man, he's making a killer salary. A couple other things I want to talk about is why she's staying home. Is there a season where she can get a part-time job? There may be kids there. And here's another thing. Again, the veterans I've worked with over the years, my buddies in the military,

they are driven. They know how to look at a problem solve that problem and go accomplish it they get it done and it's hard to look at a problem and say it's gonna take three years yeah and sometimes you like you mentioned earlier you just gotta have that patience you just gotta keep chipping away and digging and digging and clearing that hole out and eventually it's gonna work out eventually man he's making eighty thousand dollars plus another 20 on the road he's going to get a promotion he's going to keep working hard it's gonna it will turn his favor but he's got to keep plugging away and plugging away and plugging away you know one of the things that um i find so

interesting i get a lot of questions especially when um chris hogan and i will hit the road when we go to a financial peace live and events and people will come up to us outside and ask this question man you know how do i get out of debt quicker i'm doing this pyramid scheme i'm doing this i'm doing that i want to get out of debt quick i'm like it doesn't happen that way it's like you got into it quick but then you do not want to be patient to get out of it and so then what i find is people come out there come out here and they do these interesting things to get out of debt and then what happens is they put themselves further into debt right further into more issues because they're trying to cheat the system they're trying to cheat the proven proven proven plan and you guys i do not want you all to

do that all right there's strength and development growth in that slow plan yes right i'm telling you right now and i'm telling you y'all this is why we are here because we don't want you to take any shortcuts we don't want you to fall short of anything and right now i want you to ask yourself something what if you never again had to question what to do with your money. Never again. This is possible for you and you can feel in control and actually make progress. You just need the right plan, not just the right plan, the proven plan. And you know what the proven plan is? Ramsey Plus. It's one membership that coaches you step by step through our best products.

So always so you can always know you're doing the right thing with your money. You'll be guided through all all of our all of our big hitters from Financial Peace University, the premium version of every dollar in our new baby steps tracking app. Plus, you get a ton of different courses and tools and access to financial coaches. With Ramsey Plus, you can know you're doing the right thing with your money. Start your free trial today at DaveRamsey.com slash FPU. DaveRamsey.com slash FPU. Listen, you guys. There's no need to cheat the plan.

Okay. It feels good. And I get it right. I get it. I just want to get this thing out of here. Once you listen to enough, Dave, and you realize what a monkey this is on your back, what a pain it is. Yeah. You want to just go on.

Yeah. And you know what? Here's the truth, you guys. I'm going to say right under Dave Ramsey's show. Dave Ramsey, Anthony O'Neal, John Deloney,ris hogan rachel cruz christy wright ken coleman we shouldn't be your number one person you should be your number one person okay you should be the guy the young lady that says you know i'm going to get myself out of debt i'm going to do this i'm just going to work the plan that dave ramsey and the team teach but I'm going to do it. And you're the hero. You're the hero.

Okay. I'm fired up. I'm fired up. I see you, Cat. I'm coming. Y'all, this is the Dave Ramsey Show. Listen here, America. If you're ever in the Nashville, Tennessee area, let me tell you why you should come by the studio.

Because we have some of the best cookies in the world. Every show I'm on, I go out there to the lobby and I get one of the best chocolate chip. And they just had this new cookie, Dr. D. And I don't know what it's called. It has strawberry and something in it. It tastes so good. So I want to encourage you.

If you're ever in the Nashville, Tennessee area, not only can you come by here and hear Dave or hear one of the personalities, but you're going to get greeted with a beautiful, beautiful cafe with great drinks, with great cookies, and just a great staff

of people. So we would love... Hospitable, lovely folks. Yes. We would love to have you come by. And please try one of the cookies. Tell them Anthony O'Neal said, try one of the cookies. John, how are you doing, bro?

I'm good. Tired. Tired? Yeah, tired, but we are doing well and continue to plug on. Okay. All right, man. Just making sure. You? I'm doing well. I'm just excited just to be here with you on this beautiful Wednesday.

It's midweek, and I'm excited about the rest of this week. And my brother's getting married this Friday. Older brother or younger brother? Younger brother. I'm the oldest. I run the things in my family. But my younger brother. You super don't.

Okay, so tell me how that feels. I've had some relationship conversations in the past where that's a hard thing for the older brother, the older sister, when the younger brother or sister gets married first. How are you feeling? What's in your heart? Man, it's an interesting one. I'm excited for them. Because my younger sister, who's 31, she married my amazing brother-in-law. I had four amazing chocolate babies, and they're all viral and doing stuff with Apple and all that type of stuff.

And then my little brother's getting married, and I'm sitting here like, okay, Lord. But I feel good because I'm excited that he found his best thing. And I know that, you know, God is going to send me my best thing in the due time. But I'm just excited. I'm about to turn up with my brother and have a good time this weekend with him. Celebrate his life. Celebrate what God has done in his life. Very cool, man.

Very cool. So let's go out to Arkansas and have a conversation with Amber. Amber, good afternoon. How can Dr. D and I help? Well, thank you, first of all, for taking my call. Thank you for calling in. Thanks. Well, I'm okay. Where do I start? I'm a veteran for eight years in the military. Okay. Thank you for serving. Thank you. And I decided to buy a house. And I bought a house for $84,000. And never did I think that I would become an addict.

And I had gotten really far behind on my house to where it was almost being in foreclosure. Well, as of now, I'm five years clean, and I'm two and a half years current on my home because they took what I owed and wrote it into the back of my loan and refinanced it. Well, when they did that, it went from a 3.1 interest rate because I was a VA. It was a VA loan. And when they refinanced it, it bumped it up to one point four point two percent interest rate okay and it kind of concerns this uh i've been listening to y'all for maybe about a week now and it's you know you're always talking about the 15 year versus the 30 well mine

was a 30 and i didn't know what the interest rates where they are now should i refinance for 15 so right now you're at a 4.1 if i'm not mistaken yes okay yeah it's 4.1 cool and what's your um outside of your mortgage right now what's your other debt looking like uh i'm 30 000 in debt okay 30k in. And what's your gross income a year right now? Well, I'm a newlywed, and me and my husband combined make probably around $57,000. $57,000. Okay, $57,000. Newlywed.

Congrats on recently being married. And also, can we just take a quick second to celebrate you on being clean and sober for five years? I was waiting until the end, but Amber, I'm high-fiving you from Nashville, sweetheart. That is awesome. Yes. I mean, I think it's just that's the most important thing. Because if you weren't sober, if you weren't, we're not clean. We couldn't have this conversation today. So, ma'am, yes, ma'am, keep it up.

I expect to see another five, another 50 years of this lifestyle. But let's get back to how we can help you out here. So what's your mortgage payment? My mortgage payment is around, it's like46 dollars i believe a month 846 dollars a month okay and what are you yeah with your 57k what do you all see a month what's your net pay monthly um well it's probably about about four and He gets about one. About five grand? Yeah, probably about $550,000 maybe. Okay, it's about $5,000. Alright, sounds good. Here's my thing.

Here's my thing. You have $30,000 in debt. You're making $57,000. Your mortgage payment is at $846,000 right now. I don't have a problem with you looking into refinancing your mortgage payment is at $846.50 right now. I don't have a problem with you looking into refinancing your mortgage as long as there's no fees, there's no penalties, none of that. Because you are paying a 4.1. Right now, interest rates are going as low as 2.5, 2.3 right now. And so I would definitely get on the phone with Churchill Mortgage and look at your

options but here's my thing since you are already in the mortgage i honestly wouldn't have a problem with you focusing on baby step number two just going ahead and clearing out all of your debt lining it up with all on the debt snowball from smallest to largest and getting out of debt and then getting a fully funded emergency fund and then from there and then i wouldn't have you having a problem then looking at that now if you want to go towards that now get that down to a 15-year mortgage that's what we teach i don't have a problem with that but if i was in your shoes and if i was your husband i'm saying bae you know what We're already in the mortgage. Okay. And so how do we go in ahead and just knock out all this debt?

Because that's the number one concern is becoming debt free. But now if you get on the phone with Churchill Mortgage and they say, you know what? Hey, we can go ahead and get you refi, get your interest rate down, get you down to a year uh mortgage um that's that's cool now your mortgage payment is going to go up you're going to go from 846 to about maybe right around 13 1400 bucks because you are going down which is great because we want you we want you in debt as as short as possible but i would really prefer what's your debt what's the other 30k what is that cars credit cards yes i wish i would have known about y'all sooner i actually found y'all because i was gonna try to get a heloc to try to pay off my house sooner no no no and i can't yeah no no no we don't we don't do

helocs we ain't like no no no no no no no so. So what's the other $30,000? I have a Toyota RAV4 2019. 2019? Yes. What's that car note? Go ahead, what? What's the car note? $410 a month.

What else? And then we have a motorcycle, too, because we're in ministry of the Christian Motorcycle Association. So you got a motorcycle so you could be a part of a Christian organization? Yeah, we ride for Jesus. And you went in debt for Jesus, too, huh? Yeah. Okay, so Amber, here's the deal. Amber, have you gone through Financial Peace University? No, huh? Yeah. No. Okay, so Amber, here's the deal. Have you gone through, Amber, have you gone through Financial Peace University?

No, I haven't. I did download the budget app and I'm having a really hard time with that actually. Here's what we're going to do. In celebration of your service,

your eight years of service, in celebration of your five years sobriety and as a wedding gift from Anthony O'Neill, Dave Ramsey, and John Deloney, we're going to give you a year subscription to Ramsey Plus for free.

Okay? Oh, wow. Okay, thank you. But I want you to use it. You're going to have to go through Financial Peace. I want you to get on a digital class or if you have a local one there in Arkansas, I want you to use the financial peace. I want you to get on a digital class or if you have a local one there in Arkansas, I want you to use the budget apps and I want you to ask the coaching questions as you need them. I want you to use it. You've got

a lot of cool successes under your belt over the last few years and now you've got to tackle that debt. Sell the car. Sell the car. The RAV4, they hold their value. Sell the car. Yes, sell the car. Oh, man. America, thank you all. John, thank you for joining me this hour i want to thank our producer zach bennett associate producer kelly daniels and you know

what you america this is my first time saying that because y'all are absolutely amazing i love y'all man this is the dave ramsey show hey it's kelly associate producer and phone screener for The Dave Ramsey Show. If you would like to do your debt-free scream live on the show, make sure you visit DaveRamsey.com slash show and register. We would love for you to come to Nashville and tell Dave your story.