The Ramsey Show - App - Should We Invest or Save Up for a House? (Hour 1)

Episode Date: October 21, 2022

Dr. John Delony & George Kamel discuss: Helping the kids of a recently deceased relative, The best way to invest, Saving for a house vs. investing, Being the victim of a scam, Balancing family time with side hustles, Affording a home. Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET Want a plan for your money? Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3nInETX Listen to all The Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3GxiXm6 Learn more about your ad choices. https://www.megaphone.fm/adchoices Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy

Девочка-пай Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Pods Moving and Storage Studios, this is The Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and your money. I'm George Campbell, Ramsey personality and host of the Entrez Leadership Podcast and the Fine Print Podcast, joined today by my best friend, Dr. John Deloney, host of the Dr. John Deloney Show. And we are here for you, America, to take your questions about life, money, mental health, boundaries, crypto, you name it. We're here for you. And Christy kicks us off this hour in Charlotte, North Carolina. Christy, welcome to the show. Thank you. How are you?

We're doing great. How can we help? Okay, I'm going to try to get through this. It's emotional. My husband's 39-year-old sister died in a car accident in June of this year. Oh, sweet. And she left behind two daughters, 17 and 21 years old, who now live with my husband's parents. The 21-year-old graduated from college in May in three years and is starting a job as a high school math teacher this month. And the 17-year-old doesn't have a driver's license yet, but she wants to get a job after that. And I'm just trying to – I want to – I'd like to maybe purchase them

Financial Peace University. My husband and I joined in January, and we've paid off $26,000 in debt so far at the same time as paying our daughter's college tuition. So I feel like it would help them start out their lives, but also they just lost their mom. I don't know how to broach the subject if I just shouldn't because it's none of my business or anyone. So, gosh, I'm so sorry.

This is one of those devastating moments. If you were in the booth here with me and George, you can feel it in here. Like, that's the worst thing you can imagine, right? Yeah. So we'll give you FPU for both the girls. We'll take that off the table. Don't worry about that.

A quick question here. Is dad still in the picture? He pays child support, but he is remarried and lives in a different town with his wife and their newborn and her three children okay um do you have a relationship with these girls uh yes they are like my other children okay have you been with them over the last 30 days or less month and a, and we spend all the time in the world with them, yeah. Okay. Okay.

So the challenge here is you're grieving deeply. Yes, and that's why I don't know if it's a good time to bring it up because that's probably the last thing on their mind. But with her starting a new job, it's also the perfect time to get her a head start in life. Right. So you're going to have a delicate balance of both and. What you cannot do is use doing things for these girls, make them responsible for your healing through this grief.

Okay? And you've stepped into a role because this is the character of person you are, this is the relationship you had with them of some sort of maternal proxy for them. They need a mother figure as they're trying to navigate what's going to be a wild decade for them, right? One heading into their 20s and the other heading into life after high school. And so they'll need you to step into that role if they invite you in. And at the same time, you're going to have to make sure your service to them isn't, um, isn't the way you're going to find healing through this thing. Okay. Okay. So you're going to have to be really open and honest with yourself about, I need to go talk to somebody. I need to grieve this. I need to have a core group of women, my age who are doing my, that I can talk to and sitting down with these young

ladies and saying, Hey, I'm willing to step in in any way, shape, form, or fashion as we head off into life without your mom. And the greatest gift you can give them is to let them see you grieve because if they don't, they're going to think they're crazy for being as heartbroken and distraught as they are. Okay? Seeing an adult that they trust and love in their life be super sad gives them permission to be sad, which is the path towards healing. Okay? And then, yes, sitting down and saying, hey, we are anything you'll need. Here's some money. Here's'll need. Here's some money.

Here's a book. Here's a thing. Ask if they are interested in those type of things and be ready to present them if they are. Okay? But right this second, I mean, you can talk to them. They're going to be in shock for a season. Right? Right.

Oh, yeah. I mean, it was actually on the 17 year old daughter's birthday what a mess so yeah i mean it's yeah yeah there's there's you're grasping to make sense of what's next and there's just going to be a season of darkness and there's going to be a season of we got to pay the bills, right? So making sure the four walls are covered that we talk about here. Yes.

Like I said, they're living with my in-laws so the four walls are covered. That's right. They're grandparents. The greatest gift you can give them right now, I'll add a second thing.

The first one is let them see you grieve. The second one is just presence. Just presence. Just showing up and not trying to solve anything for them right now but just showing up and not trying to solve anything for them right now, but just showing up and being a, an adult who loves them in their presence and being sad with

them. And those weird little moments of laughter that you can't stop, but you don't understand why, cause you're supposed to be sad, right? All of that emotion, uh, being present with them. And they're not going to remember what y'all talked about. They won't remember the deep, dark talks. And they'll remember that, um, you know, that aunt Christie kept showing dark talks. They'll remember that Aunt Christy kept showing up. Aunt Christy kept showing up. Does that help? Yeah. Can I just tell you? I'm so sorry.

Thank you. I'm so sorry for your brother. I'm sorry for you. I'm sorry for your whole family. I'm sorry for those two young women. You're an incredible gift to them, Christy. Even without monetary gifts, just caring this deeply for those girls is probably going to do more than any financial gift you can give to them. And it sounds like they've got a good head on their shoulders. They're going to be all right. But the more you show up for them and the more you help them, you know, there's a lot of life to be lived. They're 17 and 21. And so this is not a what to do in the next six months. This is what does the next 10 years

look like of supporting them and being this maternal proxy, like John mentioned. But we want to be a part of that by gifting them Financial Peace University. I hope they go through it. I don't know that I would have at 17 in this stage of life and what they're going through, but it's there when they want it. And we'll throw in the app too. That may be the, you can be like, Hey, we're good financial piece and we've got this app. And they'll be like, all right, I'll look at the app. Um, but we'll send you the every dollar app too. Um, we'll send you three of those one for each one of them and one for you and your husband to use. Um, and you can say, Hey, we'll, we'll step in the gap here. If they roll their eyes and they're like,

no, it's not the time. Aunt Christy, we could care less. But that's fine. They are young people grieving because their entire world has been dumped upside down. And they're going to grieve this for a long, long time. As George said, we're settling in for the long game on this one. I'm so, so sorry. I'm going to go ahead and send you a copy of Dr. John's book,

Own Your Past, Change Your Future, and Ken Coleman's book, From Paycheck to Purpose, to maybe help out that 17-year-old as she figures out what the new normal looks like, as she figures out education and adulthood and all this stuff. So thank you so much for the call, Christy. So sorry for what you're going through, what those girls are going through. We're cheering you guys on for what's next. And hang on the line. Austin will pick up.

We'll get you Own Your Past, Change your future. From Paycheck to Purpose, Financial Peace University, two sets of that and every dollar premium for the girls. Thanks so much for the call and trusting us with the situation. More of your calls coming up. 888-825-5225. This is The Ramsey Show. show. 888-825-5225. This is The Ramsey Show. I'm John Pelloni, joined by George Camel. We're taking your calls on money, life, relationships, mental health, anything you got going on, work.

Give us a shout. 888-825-5225. Let's go out to H-Town. Let's go talk to Steven in Houston. What's up, Steven? Hey, guys. How are you doing? It's an honor to be on.

Thank you so much, brother. What's up? All right. So I'm 17 years old. I live in Houston, Texas. And for the past year and a half, inspired by y'all, I've been doing my best to save and work and working a job at Starbucks and various side hustles. I've managed to save $15,000.

Whoa. Way to go, man. You got any debt? Appreciate it. No, absolutely none. Dude, you're a rock star. Way to go. So you got $15,000 saved and no debt. And what is your question today? Well, the problem is that whole $15,000 is sitting in a high school checking account. And I've been looking up on inflation lately, and it's not looking so good for it. So I was wondering if you had any advice on it. I've been thinking about putting my money in mutual funds,

and my parents have already started a Roth IRA for me, and they're already maxing that out. Wow. I've been having a hard time investing because my parents are in the higher income brackets. So I'd have to get 35% basically off the money at any time I invest with them. Okay. Let's slow down a second, Stephen. What do you want to do with your life? Take about 30% off. What's the next four or five years of your life look like? Are you looking to go to college? Are you looking to go to college?

Are you looking to go into the workforce, be an entrepreneur? What are you thinking? Yes, sir. I want to go to college. I'm thinking A&M right now. They have a pretty good value. And they're right here in Texas, like I spoke to my family. The whole situation I have is my parents set aside $110,000 for me.

And anything I don't spend is mine. So I'm looking for a state school for sure. Dude, you are the man and your parents have raised you well. Sharp people. So here's the thing. I think you have plenty of time to invest. I have no question you're going to be a multi-millionaire probably by your early 30s at the latest. And so what I want you to do right now is invest in Steven and make sure that we get Steven through college completely debt free. And maybe you're going to want to upgrade in car and maybe you're going to meet a nice girl. Maybe you're going to want to buy a house. There's a lot of life that's going to happen in the next 10 years. So I don't want you to throw all your money into investments in the name of inflation.

Absolutely. So, so it's one of those things, brother, you are so ahead of the people around you that you found yourself all alone and you feel like you're behind and you're not. You are way, way ahead. George, you can do the math quicker than I can, but the inflation against your $15,000 is not going to be make or break over the next few years. You're not talking like, oh, I would have made $15,000 is not going to be make or break over the next few years. You're not talking like, oh, I would have made $10,000. You know what I mean?

Yeah, you could put it, and if you want to, put it in a high-yield savings account, which will get you maybe a percent and a half right now, which is better than zero. Absolutely. I was thinking Marcus by Goldman Sachs. Is that a good one? Yeah, I use that one, and it's great. And so that's a good place to park money, but I would not put it into the stock market, into mutual funds.

It'll create some taxable scenarios. Your money's going to be locked up. You might be selling at a loss. I don't want that for you at 17. When you've got a lot of life expenses coming up between car, college, housing, there's a lot of unknowns right now. And so I'd rather you have a giant pile of liquid cash at 22 than say, well, I'm broke, but I have a hundred thousand in mutual funds. Yay. Exactly. And, um, that $110,000 looks huge until you start spending it on college,

right? So that's a good semester and a half, probably. I'm just kidding. Texas A&M is a great school. Um, but that you're going to burn through that $110,000 over four years pretty quickly when you factor in rent and room and board and tuition and study abroad, all those things that pop up. So hang in there, brother. And his parents already have the Roth IRA going for him at 17. That's exactly right. So we're doing great, doing great. All right, let's go to Paul in San Francisco.

What's up, Paul? Hey, guys. I have a question for you. I'm 27 years old. I just recently got married about a month ago. Me and my wife are trying to figure out. Thank you very much. Me and my wife are trying to figure out the best approach to create financial freedom in our life.

And our next goal is to purchase a home. Now I live in the Bay area and it's extremely expensive to purchase a home out here. So we're trying to figure out if we should be putting all of our ducks in one basket to put, you know, everything towards this home, or as we're doing now, we're putting some money aside for 401k for mutual funds and other means of investments. So I'm trying to figure out, should we be splitting it like we're doing now? Or should we be trying to put a lot more heavy load onto the house side? Well, I'll borrow this tagline from Reese's.

There's no wrong way to eat a Reese's. And so this kind of applies to your 3B. It's the wrong way to say it though, George. It's Reese's. Reese's Pieces. That's how I remember it. So when it comes to 3B and Baby Step 4, which is what you're talking about, do we pause investing to save up the down payment?

It largely depends on your lifestyle, your income, your age, your future goals, your risk tolerance. And your shoe's at 27. You guys are pretty young. You just got married. There's nothing wrong with investing right now as long as you're okay slowing down the down payment process, especially in the Bay Area,

which means it could take five to eight years to save up a down payment, right? Right, right. What's your household income? Right now, we clear about 200K after tax. Which is minimum wage for San Francisco. Yes. Do you guys want to

stay there long term yeah you know i own a business here okay um so it's it it would be really hard to move i would love to get out of this area honestly but it's just you know it just really depends it's it's a kind of a custom business, so it'd be hard to move it somewhere else. Okay. Well, we usually say if it's going to be longer than two to three years, you're pausing investing. That's our limit. And so if it's going to be beyond that, I would go ahead and begin investing beyond that period of time. But if it's for a short period, two to three years, you want to pause investing, you guys are young, you got plenty of time on your side, you have a great income. Then if you want to stack up that down payment in two to three years, because you have 15% more

of your income, we're okay with that too. So what would that look like for you? Let's say you paused investing, how quickly could you save up a reasonable down payment for a reasonable place in the Bay Area? Well, the goal would be at least 50% down, which is somewhere here is five to 600 K. Um, you know, currently we have a 60 K emergency fund, which I want to hold there. Whoa. And we have about, you know, 400, 500 K in investments. So, you know, we could kind of tap into that stuff, but I don't really want to come my legs off there. So if we didn't tap into any of that stuff. Is that non-retirement investments? All non-retirement. You're going to hate this. Most of it's in crypto, actually. Wow. Well, I'm just looking at that pile of money going, hey, what if we cashed out

with $500,000 and we fast forward this thing and get out of crypto? What are you doing, man? Yeah, I know. it's a i'm trying to juggle that around too trust me okay okay uh you keep juggling it or hang with me here um you can just like stop juggling here's what's really cool about your situation you could do one of two things you could take your crypto money and put it in your front yard and just set it all on fire which would be cool which is what essentially you're doing or um you could have a house in the next 30 45 days yeah yeah which would be really nice so do we want virtual money you You want pretend money for internet money?

I have some friends who have some internet girlfriends. They're not real, but it's fun. Or do you want a real house that you can put your real body and family into? Yeah. The latter is the obvious answer. I guess what goes on in my head is, hey, I've made insane growth on my investment over the last 10 years of doing these investments and I don't want to, you know, it'd be hard for me to cut that off because

You know who thinks the same way? Gamblers in Vegas. They're like, well, I'm doing great. I'm going hot at the craps table. I don't want to get up now. I gotta go to the bathroom. I'm just gonna pee in the bottle under the table because I don't want to leave the table, right? Hey, listen, there's a great Nassim Taleb quote that I love. It says,

I woke up today, so I'm either immortal or I haven't died yet. And you, my friend, have been playing with fire. And you think, oh, I'm just going to keep building and building. There's a point when this comes to a dramatic and swift

end. I would suggest you cut your losses. Here's another quote. Quit while you're ahead. Exactly. That's a simpler way to say it. Go buy a house today. Tell your wife it's happening. House time is on me and my imaginary money. We'll be right back. are you sick of planned obsolescence you, when companies make products crappy so you have to buy more of their crappy products?

Well, me too. And it's why I love companies like Grip6. Grip6 is all about quality products meant to last forever. That's why their comfortable, bulk-free belts, slimline wallets, and lightweight wool socks all come with a lifetime warranty and simple returns and exchanges so check them out at grip6.com today and get up to 20 off with the promo code ramsey Every time you hear someone do their debt-free scream on the show, it's because at some point they said, enough, I'm not living like this anymore, I've had it.

When you get mad like that and do what they did, your life will change too. And right now, inflation and your stupid credit cards are killing you. I'll say that again. your life will change too. And right now, inflation and your stupid credit cards are killing you. I'll say that again. Your stupid credit cards and inflation. I had a buddy the other day say, I'd go into debt for some of my kids. This is killing you. You've started to believe that you're not in control of your money and that's wrong. You have to decide to control what you can control, and that's you, your thoughts and your actions. You have the power to change your future, and Financial Peace University will show you how.

This course will teach you the proven step-by-step plan that's helped nearly 10 million people beat debt, master budgeting budgeting and build wealth notice i didn't say hey just go to tiktok and get some investing advice or go to the instagrams man but john i'm gonna start a laundromat to get to become wealthy and get out of debt knock your lights out nah we need some good laundromats out in the world but that's not the way out it's not the way out follow a course that has worked for millions and millions and millions of people. You can do it. Stop letting debt and money, stress control your life. Say enough and take back control.

Go to ramsaysolutions.com slash enough. That's ramsaysolutions.com slash enough to start Financial Peace University. All right, let's go out to D-Town, Dallas, Texas and talk to Melissa. What's up, Melissa? Hi, thank you so much for taking my call today. You got it. What's up? I have an issue with a used car that I just purchased less than 30 days ago. And I believe I've been scammed by the dealership. Um, you know, as far as the condition of the car, uh, when I purchased it, um, due to a, a multi-point inspection that they gave me that is inaccurate, um, in relation to what I found out that's actually happening to the car. And so I'm wondering if I can return it or if I, you know, should request to get help with the repairs or if I should just kind of, you know, accept, I don't know, I hate to say responsibility, but accept what has happened and then just kind

of do what I can to get things fixed on it. So what does the car need repaired? So it needs two front axles in the front. It has a transmission leak. There was some type of ring or seal that needs to correct that. It needs rotors and brake pads. And none of this was in the inspection report? No.

Was this a reputable dealer or it was just on the side of the road? Where'd you get this car? No, this was a reputable bigger dealership. Have you contacted them? I have. And they told me that, of course, they said that there's no warranty, but there was no sticker on the car. Usually, I didn't even realize that until recently when I bought it. There was no sticker or anything, and there's no paperwork that says that so but um also they said well we'll just you know take care of the diagnostic on the car but we're not doing anything

else beyond that here's what i would do i would take it first i would go get it um a second inspection even if i got to pay for it okay Okay. I would go get another mechanic that you trust to take their step-by-step inspection and go through it and have them sign off on each one of these things. Okay. A certified mechanic. And you're frustrated right now and you're part pissed off at them

and you're part kicking yourself. And it's good to get a professional expert on all these little points. Okay. Because it may narrow down to, actually expert on all these little points. Okay. Because it may narrow down to actually, you don't need this. You don't need this. You need two things, or they may look at you and say, I'm so sorry. You got taken advantage of. Okay. So Melissa, I answer these questions. Um, you know, how I would respond if I was in your shoes and what I would do is go to the dealership in person and ask for the sales manager,

not the salesperson, the sales manager, because they can actually do something about it and be kind and appeal at a human level and say, hey, I'm looking for a fair solution to this problem. Here's what happened. This is my starting point. Have you tried that? I would say this. I have been talking directly to the sales manager, I think maybe three times so far, and he's the one who's saying we're not going to do anything. Then we're going up. We're going to find the VP of the dealership. We're going to go to the next level up.

But I want you to take that other inspection with you, okay? It's not just feelings and opinions. It's data. That's exactly right. Which John loves. Backs over feelings. Exactly. So if you go to the VP, if you go to the higher level of management and they still do nothing,

that's when we go, all right, I didn't want to play hardball, but we're doing it. You're going to contact the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. You can contact the FTC, the Federal Trade Commission, the Attorney General. You can turn to social media and that is going to light a fire under their butts to do something about this problem. I guarantee it. Okay. If they, if they winked over a crummy car, right, they pulled one over on you. There is, um, there is like a lesson learned, right? I'm going to always, anytime I get a car, I'm going to take it to a certified mechanic. That's not a part of the dealership to have.hip. These are things you learn as you go. Dave calls them stupid techs, right? It just is what it is.

I'm concerned that you were lied to. You were handed a piece of paper that said this thing has been certified, and if it has, then there's a mechanic in that facility that has a certification number that signed off on this thing. And if it's traced back to that particular mechanic, then they're going to lose their, their certification license. Okay.

Okay. And so I want to get a third party to look at it and then what George said. And by the way, go in there with kindness and directness and data. Um, if you go in yelling and screaming and kicking, like I would go, I feel like doing right now on your behalf,

then people are going to send me away. Is that fair? Yeah, yeah, totally. Because, yeah, I think they somehow I feel like they knew or they didn't really look at this car, you know, and they just put it on the lot. And I don't think that's right. They may have. For them to tell me, okay.

Yeah, no, if they handed you a piece of paper that said, hey, it's been certified, it's all good, we've passed our inspection, then that's dishonest business, right? They lied to you and they took advantage of you. And hopefully we can get this worked out. If they can't and ultimately you exhaust these calls like that George gave you and there's nothing to come of it exhale it sucks it is what it is and then we're gonna get this thing paid off we're

gonna get it repaired or we're gonna get sold whatever and then we're just gonna have learned for next time carrying around the anger and the frustration and the rage does not solve any of these problems moving forward it's become frustrating um ge. George, these things make me so mad. I know. One of my biggest pet peeves is consumer issues like this, where it just makes your blood boil. And I'm not a fan of the, like, the customer is always right. They're not. Sometimes you got to fire your customers because they're crazy. But there is a level that I want to help people stand up for themselves and realize that they have options. A lot of people just go, well, either I eat it or I have to go in there kicking and screaming. There's a different option. You can go in with kindness. You can do a step-by-step approach and then ramp it up over

time and go, all right, I'm going to have to go to social media. I'm going to have to report it to the FTC, whoever. I have to get an attorney because y'all clearly weren't honest with me. Yeah. But oftentimes I found that just taking that first step, being a real person with the sales manager, being a little bit of a squeaky wheel with the VP going, listen, man, you guys, I've had a great experience other than this. And I would hate for that to tarnish that, me for having to talk to my friends and tell them to stay away from this dealership because of how they treated their customers.

And for me to have to go to the FT, I don't want to go down this path. Let's just make it right. I'm not asking for a lot. I'm not asking for a free car. I'm just asking for you to make these repairs and I'll be on my way. And I bought a car several months ago and from a dealer here in town. And it was such a negative, dishonest experience that at the very end with the last little gotcha, had my kids with me. We're, we're coming back. I mean, it was a whole thing. But I looked at the salesman and said,

I hope this feels good. Congratulations. You got me. You got me. And I can tell you, not a single person, and I'm not going to be ugly. I'm not going to be rude.

I'm going to take my kids. I'm going to take this thing, this car, and we're going to go. We will never do business here again. And if anyone says, hey, I'm going to, I'm going to let, let them know with kindness and respect. Um, and it wasn't worth, wasn't worth the lack of it. But you're too classy to name drop them on air. And I respect that. Nope. Not gonna do that. This is the Ramsey Show, 888-825-5225.

Blinds.com's 100% satisfaction guarantee means even if you mismeasure or pick the wrong color, they'll remake your blinds for free. You get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you'll save even more. Use promo code RAMSY to get the best deal. Today's question comes from Ashley in Virginia. She says, I'm 27 years old and wondering how people my age can ever be able to buy a home or save for a wedding. My fiancé and I will make a combined income of about $150,000, but these things still seem like something that will never be attainable for people our age.

Ooh, a lot of negativity here from Ashley. Oh, it was me. You make $150,000. People would, I mean, they would give anything to make $150,000 a year. So here's my thing, John. There's something behind this. Yes. Number one, there could be a pile of debt to where they're going,

well, how am I going to save for a house? I mean, I've got $2,500 in payments every month going out to lenders because of my student loan and my car payment. And the other piece of this that I'm seeing is she's probably looking at really nice houses in her parents' neighborhood, and she's looking at weddings on Instagram that are probably six-figure weddings, and she's going, how am I going to save up for these things? And the truth is you don't.

You go, we're going to do a $10,000 wedding and call it great, and we're going to DIY the little decor pieces that everyone takes home and then throws away that you hope they keep forever. Be honest, Sean, you've done it. And then we're going to go, what's an actual reasonable condo in our area that we might be able to save up for, for the next three or four years? Or a one bedroom apartment or a two bedroom apartment, right? That yes, they're overpriced right now. They're expensive. No question about it. But man, let's say in 10 years, we want to be at a certain place or in 15 years. And by the way, this is the way it's been done for generation after generation, after generation, there was

a tiny little sliver window where it was like Bonanza. But the idea that I'm just going to walk out with my fancy job and buy the house that my parents live in and play golf at the same, if you're don't do that, but to do all these these, get the boat that my dad has and get the, this, my car, it's just not how it works. That's not how they did it. It's not how their parents did it before them. And people need to slow down, slow down. And I think you touched on a good point. The debt is crushing people, right?

The debt is absolutely crushing people. And the rental, the rates for rents have gone through the roof. So let's say this. I have seen some budgets that are just hard. People make good money, like this magical six-figure number, and they're still looking at things and their student loan debt at this and this, and they realize, man, I can barely make it. I'm making a good salary.

I thought if I made this salary, things were going to be quote-unquote okay. What do you tell them, man? Well, number one, I don't want to be insensitive is what I'm saying. Yeah. I mean, you've got to look and say, well, are you doing a budget? Do you have debt? What if we got you out of debt? What could that do to your monthly income?

What do you get to keep it? And so making $150,000, let's say they take home $100,000. That's very conservative. But you take $100,000 with no payments, and we can save up pretty easily $50,K a year, even with all of our expenses. But when you make 150K and it's all, you're trying to invest, you're trying to pay off debt, you're trying to do this over here, you're going on vacations, you're eating out, and then you wonder how people save. And so that is the problem I'm having with this is there's not enough of a financial picture to really look at it and go, here's the issue. But based on how it's phrased, it's very pessimistic.

My parents bought their house for, you know, 11 raspberries and a sheep. And it's like, I'll never be able to afford this $500,000 house. And the truth is you can start at $150,000 house stair-step your way up over a long period of time. That's what you're saying. That's what our parents did. My parents lived in the same house. They still do for over 30 years. All right.

And so there's a lot of sacrifices that need to be made. And you and I drive old, used, beat-up car. I mean, the illusion, Dave takes care of us very, very well, but we drive old, beat-up cars because they're depreciating assets. And I've got different financial goals and I've got different financial goals. You've got different financial goals. Our priorities are, like a lot of people, they want to have the nice car, the nice house, go on amazing vacations, and X, Y, Z.

I want those things too, but I had some buddies come up from way back in the day, some of my former students that have just gone on to do some amazing things. They came to visit me on Friday. They're up here, and then we all walked out after we spent some time upstairs on the terrace then when i hopped in the car one of them said i think you're driving and i was like yes because i choose to right and it's not because i'm any better than anybody else right i sure made that mistake when i was 27 good grief oh yeah but you got no one to impress and that is like a superpower

in today's society that's's exactly right. Wow. And so my heart breaks for Ashley because you've got to shift your picture, right? And if you start out at 150K at 27 years old, A, you're winning, and B, please set off on a track of optimism, and we're going to solve some of these hard problems, even if that means we're not going to be in Virginia very long or even if that means we're going to live in this neighborhood versus this neighborhood or whatever. And I'm not,

George, I do think there's a good pushback to if you would just quit drinking a latte and avocado toast, you'd be rich. That's nonsense, right? And yet it can help. But this year, Ashley, set about saying, look how blessed we are.

Look how we're doing great. Let's put these things in order and get going and have a smaller wedding, buy a smaller house, and let's let this stuff grow over time. Yeah, I think there's a lot of contentment that could be had here, some delayed gratification, and just setting realistic goals and saying, all right, I'm 27. By 30, we're going to be in that house. And here's what it's going to take to get there. Are we willing to be all in on this goal? And that to me, that's some amazing growth can happen there, especially as a couple, her fiance, she's not married to, so they'll be making combined 150s. They haven't even experienced what that dual income is going to be like yet. So stay patient, Ashley.

All right, let's go to Max in Philly. What's up, Max? Hey guys, thank you so much for the time. Appreciate it, big fan. You got it. What's up? So I have a side hustle that I've really kind of taken to the next level over the past year and a half. And I don't know how much of that is COVID and people are allowed back outside at bars and stuff like that. But I'm a part-time musician. I play piano and sing. And, uh, I got a text from my wife coming home from a gig this weekend that really kind of scared me a little bit in terms of, you know, balancing things out. She, you know, she's pregnant. We're about to have a baby in December and basically said that, you know,

the amount of time that I'm away is really kind of starting to affect her. And I don't think she's wrong because over the last two years, I've basically taken every single gig that's been thrown my way, regardless of how much it pays or anything like that. So I've been, I've been away a lot. Um, so I'm kind of wondering if I can, if one like afford to kind of not do the smaller gates or have like a baseline

price of how much I'll go and do it, do this for. And I, you know, and she's not asking me to stop. Okay. So Max, Max,

Max, Max, this is not have anything to do with your job. This has to do with your pregnant wife who loves you and misses you. And she's looking into the future and saying, is this going to be my life? Am I going to be a single mom? Right.

This isn't about you being a musician or you making money or side hustle, getting out of this, none of that stuff. This is, am I going to be a, is this the rest of my life? And the greatest gift you could give her is to sit down and you take her to dinner, take her to breakfast or whatever that looks like and say, I've been running as hard as I could. Yes, I love this. Yes, I've got these latent dreams of being a famous musician, but I've been making good money, and here we are. I want to take the work off the table. Let's talk about the life we want to build together, and then we're going to backfill this stuff there.

Are you in a lot of debt right now? Well, yeah. So that's the thing. This is a side hustle. It's not my full-time job. So right now? Well, yeah. So that's the thing. This is a side hustle. It's not my full-time job. So I make $65,000. I know, but are you in a lot of debt right now? Yeah, I have a huge amount of student loans.

Okay. For the whole house? Yes. Okay. So it may be sitting down with her and saying, we have to get this stuff cleaned up. And the quicker we do this, then the more time I'm going to be able to be sitting down with her and saying, we have to get this stuff cleaned up. And the quicker we do this, then the more time I'm going to be able to be at home with you and with the

kid and all that. But it's about this indefinite versus we have a plan that we are following together. You see the difference? One of them is just, Oh, this is going to be the rest of my life. And the other is,

Nope, we got seven more months on this thing and then we're going to be, we're going to be solid. How much money do you guys have max in savings? I have about five grand sitting in my account right now. I'm not sure how much she has. Let's pause the debt payoff and store up some money until mom and baby are back home safe and then we can go attack it.

But I think you guys need that security right now. Let's's have a conversation about our life, and let's get on a plan together. In fact, hang on the line. We'll give you Financial Peace University as our gift for having your first baby. We're excited for you, man. This is The Ramsey Show. We'll be back. Hey, it's John Deloney, co-host of The Ramsey Show. Did you know over 18 million people listen to The Ramsey Show every week? A lot of those people listen on one of our 600-plus radio stations across the country. To find a station near you, go to RamseySolutions.com slash show.