The Ramsey Show - App - The Baby Steps WORK No Matter Your Life Situation (Hour 1)

Episode Date: February 1, 2022

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, this is The Ramsey Show, where we help you live your best life by being healthy relationally, successful professionally, and peaceful financially. 888-825-5225 is the phone number. I'm Ken Coleman, joined by John Deloney, and we are here together for you this hour. What do you want to talk about? You got some relationship issues that are creating financial problems?

Uh-oh. Dr. John is on call, ready to go. You got some work issues? You just simply need to make some more money to get through those baby steps faster. I'm your guy. Let's get you a fatter paycheck and eventually help you do work that is absolutely purposeful for you. Of course, we're going to take your money questions. It's just in the middle of all this life stuff.

So we're excited that you are with us. Dr. John, you ready to go? You got hydrated there? Let's do it. You're there? Let's do it. You're ready? Let's do it. Let's go to John to start us off in Madison, Wisconsin. John, how can we help? Yeah, hi. Can you hear me? Yes, sir.

Yeah, all right. I'll try to make this quick. So my wife and I, we both make a gross income of $144,000. We're about 80,000 in debt. And we have two paid-for vehicles. One is a $9,000 pretty cheap vehicle. And then the other one is about 25,000 to 30,000. And so if we were to sell the Jeep, we estimate that we could get out of debt by the end of this year. But if we keep the Jeep, we estimate that we could get out of debt by the end of this year. But if we keep

the Jeep, then that would kind of add like an extra four months to pay it off or to pay off all our debt. So I'm just wondering if we should pull the trigger and sell this thing and sell it for like $25,000 to $30,000 and then put that towards the debt and get like a cheap $7,000 vehicle. Um, I was wondering what you guys have. Yeah. I, before we, John told you what he thinks, I'm curious, which way were you leaning at the start of this call? You called us. I think you were leaning one way or the other, which way? Yeah. So actually one other thing I'll add is we actually already bought another vehicle, um, for $7,000. And, um and um so i we're definitely more than

feel like you already made your decision and you were asking us if you should return the one more quick thing ken i've already sold the jeep just want you to know basically yeah well the thing is like we love the jeep and over the past couple of days we've really been like do we really want to sell this thing and then just buy it again like you know two years down the road or a year and a half down the road because now that you've got like you really love it now that you've got a second car it becomes a thirty thousand dollar toy yeah that with the debt you have you can't afford it doesn't make any sense at all i would i agree

with john my in i was that's what i would do because here's what I know. There are more Jeeps. Let me cast a little vision for you for a second. What year is the Jeep? What color is it? Tell me about it. It's a 2020 gray Jeep Cherokee Limited. Oh, please, dude. You can find that all day long down the road when you get where you really want to go.

And here's what happened. A bunch of people are buying cars overpriced right now. Yeah. And then in 24 months, you're going to be able to buy your Jeep back with cash for less than you sold it. Yep. I agree. I'd sell it at the top of the market. Yeah.

And that's actually what triggered all this is because we were like, whoa, we can actually get more money for our Jeep than what we paid for it. Yeah, sell it. Stop talking about it. Sell it today. Do it now. Merry Christmas. We just made you $30,000 on a free call. How about that?

That's the kind of value we're creating. Whoa, dude, nice call there, dropping the ROI out. ROI, man. I love that. One free call, $30,000. There you go. Next. Yes, Veena joins us next in Cleveland, Ohio.

Veena, how can we help? Hi. Thank you guys for taking my call. I hope everyone is okay. Bear with me. I am very nervous right now. You're doing great. We're going to take good care of you.

I'm sitting next to Ken Coleman. I'm nervous, too. So go ahead. Yeah, sure. That's a good thing. I wasn't even sure I was go ahead. Yeah, sure. That's a good thing. You know, I wasn't even sure I was going to get through, so this must be meant to be. Anyway, I am 53 years old. I just started trying to do the baby steps.

I'm on the 30-day trial of Ramsey Plus because I did order the Baby Steps Millionaire book. So I attended the first three classes already of Financial Peace University. And I'm starting out with everything, but I am not quite sure where do I begin. I have some things that I definitely need to pay off, like state tax, IRX tax. I have some loans that I had to take out just to try to make ends meet, kind of like payday loans. And I'm not sure where to start out paying those off first, or should I start out, you know, trading for the emergency fund? Well, okay. So, Vena, you're brand new, and we're so thrilled you called. Like, I couldn't be more excited that you got through. So, I'm glad you ordered the book,

and we're going to give you Dave's Total Money Makeover at the end of this call for free. Hey, you know what else we're going to give her? You got the 30-day trial. We're going to give you a year subscription to Ramsey Plus. Fantastic. Okay? We love giving away.

You're in it for a year. I love giving away Dave's money, so it's awesome. Yeah, we are really gifted at it. But, Vena, so here's the deal. So this is actually really simple. So you want to do baby step one, all right? right you're going to see this in total money makeover and you're going to see this you get involved uh with ramsey plus so baby step one is a thousand dollars you need to do everything you can to get that a thousand dollar emergency fund first that's just a guard against anything

that might happen along this debt-free journey okay okay? Then baby step two is you take all of those debts. So you begin to list those out to us. And so what we want you to do, get it out on paper, computer, however you feel comfortable. Yep, I got it. And we go smallest debt, okay, to largest. And we're going to attack that way. Don't care who you owe money to. Yes.

Except for the IRS. There's one card for the IRS. I don't care what the interest rates are. Your friends are going to hear about this and say, well, you need to pay off your highest interest. This is about psychology, not about dollars and cents. Right. Now, if you're in hot to the IRS, they will take your soul.

So you want to pay them off. I want to pay my plans. I want to pay my plans. Great. What do you owe them? Oh, about $9,000. Okay. And I'm on a payment plan, yeah.

What is your income? $87,000. Okay. Yes. So I want you to get that $1,000 emergency fund, and I want the IRS gone in three months. Okay? Okay. Whatever you scratch, claw, whatever you got to do.

Get the IRS off your back, and you know what you're going to do for the first time in a long time? You're going to sleep the whole night without waking up in the middle of the night. Mm-hmm. Yeah, because right now it's just like all, the only thing I think about is all the stuff I have to pay. That's right. And then you're going to look at that list that Ken outlined for you.

You're going to look at that list, and you're just going to say, done with you, done with you. And you're going to start with that one department store that you still owe $42, and you're going to move all the way up to some student loan that you have or some whatever is next. Yeah, I got a lot of those too. There you go. Don't overthink it.

What's your total debt number? It's over $200,000. Okay. Oh, my goodness. Does that include your house? No, I'm presently renting, and actually the first thing I need to do is get out of that because my rent is entirely too high. Okay, I'll tell you what else.

Here's what I want you to do, Vena. I want you to hold on the line. We're going to get you free of charge. We're giving away free stuff. Let's get her one of our counselors. They're going to get you free of charge. We're giving away free stuff. Let's get her one of our counselors. They're going to work you through what you're dealing with emotionally. Obviously, they'll solidify the baby steps plan. You're going to get total money makeover.

We got you in Ramsey Plus. Work the plan. It will work if you stay with it. If you've got to work two, three jobs and you're able physically, do that. Less time to worry about anything because you're working so hard. You're going to be free. Don't move. More Ramsey Show coming up.

No matter what time of year it is, focusing on your family's financial plan is always a smart move. I get questions all the time about where to start and what to do first. One of the most crucial and affordable first steps to take is to protect your family and get term life insurance. I know it's not glamorous, but all the other steps mean a lot less if something happens to you and your family has no financial protection. Getting term life insurance needs to be a top priority. I recommend 10 to 12 times your income and lock in rates for 15 to 20 years. This gives you plenty of time to get out of debt and build wealth. I've been

recommending Zander Insurance for over 20 years and they understand and live this strategy and will take the time to help you find the most affordable term life rates go to zander.com or call 800-356-4282 it's not that expensive it's not complicated and you need to do it now Welcome back, America. You are listening to The Ramsey Show, where we help you win relationally, professionally, financially, with hope-filled, practical steps that you can take so that you live the life that you want to live.

I'm Ken Coleman, joined by Dr. John Deloney. We are here taking your calls. It is a free call, 888-825-5225, 888-825-5225. So obviously we take your money calls, but hey, what do you got going on? John and I, when we're together, I'll put this out there. If you're listening and you've got a really difficult work situation, I mean, it's nasty. John, I reported earlier today on the Ken Coleman Show, 55% – this is a National Education Association poll. Do you believe that?

55% of teachers are planning to exit. This is a dumpster fire. It's a crisis because these are the men and women that care deeply about our kids. They're on the front line. And those exits are going to create even more of a problem. But, hey, they got to do what they got to do. The follow-up was businesses are clamoring. Well, of course they are.

So you've got men and women who are organized, good communicators. Instructors have the heart to instruct and teach. Who love helping and caring for people. Every business on the planet is like, yes, please. How do you not plug teachers in? Oh, you want to work just a normal shift and we'll double your salary? Sure, come on over. Oh, yeah, with all the other benefits.

You can actually do your job the way that you want to. But anyway, we digress. But we're here to help you get some family stuff going on. Remember, folks, if you've got a crappy work situation you drag that stuff home if if your family life is is going bananas and it's awful you're dragging that to work with you if you got money you're money kicking everywhere too money's entrenched in all of that right so how can john and i help today listen we're going to treat you with respect um we've all done dumb we don't judge we're here to help you. One phone call away.

Excuse me, 888-825-5225. 888-825-5225. San Antonio, Texas is where we go next. And Joshua joins us there. Joshua, how can we help? Sorry, I'm almost done paying off the debt. I just have a couple more debts, and then I'll be debt-free. Good for you. My first debt, yes, thank you. My first debt that I have a question about are these two medical bills. When I call them, they say that they can't find it. So, yeah, there are two medical bills. So do I just, like, not worry about it and just move on to the next one?

Okay, well, let's – so we'll dive into that. So you're working the baby steps, I hope. That's why you called the show. And so if we look at the debt snowball plan, we go the smallest debt first. We pay that off. We take the payment you've been making towards that, and we roll it. You understand that, correct? Yeah.

And you're doing that, right? Yeah. So where are the medical loans in your debt snowball? Are they up next? Are they further down the list? Where are you at right now? Oh, like, are they one of the smaller medical bills? Like, they're $44.69.

I already called them. Okay. And they just yeah so i mean i mean i mean so just and they just can't find them so they're literally saying you called us about a 44 payment and i think if i heard you correctly a 69 payment we can't find it in our system anywhere yeah so my question was do i just not worry about it so here's what I would do. I would take that money, and do you have the money, $69 and $44? Yeah. Quite honestly, given how absurd and chaotic, and again, I'm biased because I've been dealing with this recently,

billing systems are at hospitals. I would take that bill you're holding in your hand for $44, and I would just mail it. And at some point, you'll circle back, and they'll send it to you. Or I'd put $120 in an account and just let it sit there. And when they send you another bill, if you owe them money, they will follow you to your grave. So you can rest assured that if you owe it, they'll come after you. Well, and John's right, but I would also say this. If you've got somebody on the phone, it's worth a second call.

And if we get a second person to go say send me this in writing can't find this in the system i'd say could you send me something on letterhead an email something in writing saying that you no longer have to pay this because we can't find it and then i would stick and then i'd take the 150 put it on the next debt but john's right okay until you get something in writing you might as well assume that somewhere somebody's going to come back for it. And this is not a lot of money. Yeah. So I think you've got a couple great options there. Appreciate the call, young man, and you are on your way.

Congratulations, Joshua. You've got to love hearing somebody go, man, I'm getting after it. He's getting after it. And if my advice changes there, if it's $1,000, right, when it's $100, I don't want to spend the same. And I did this. I'm a cheapskate. I'm going to get the letter for $150. 150 this is me the pot talking to the kettle here i punted on 150 charge it i was because i was so i felt deceived yeah and i kept trying to make my case and my wife's like hey this is

150 you please pay this i was like no i've got i'm digging my heels in like i was some kind of revolutionary area with you i was an idiot i should have of it. The tax on my soul wasn't worth me holding out, and we ended up having to pay anyway. So anyway. Oh, I see what you're saying. But I'm saying in this situation, if somebody's telling me I don't owe it. All right, I'm in. Next. There you go.

Yeah, man, life's too short to worry about that. All right, let's go to Los Angeles, California next. Antonio is there. Antonio, how can we help? Hey, guys. Thanks for taking my call. So the reason I was calling, I'm a new listener. I'm 23 years old, and my parents have decided to sell their house.

They've worked very hard their whole life and move into an investment property that they could basically live in rent-free, and that was pretty much their plan ever since they purchased it, and just taking advantage of the real estate market right now in our current house. So I want to know if I should move in with them as they want me to. In our culture, it's pretty traditional, I guess, until you're married to move in with them, or if I should start to sort of think about budgeting myself and moving in myself. I'm guessing that since you're calling, you are torn between your cultural traditions and this gnawing sense that I'm 23, 24, I want my own place. Am I right?

Yeah. I mean, I enjoy living with them. I love my family, but maybe it's just kind of natural for me getting at this age and being in the position I'm in to sort of start to think about that. Sure. You answered it. You answered it with a but. Yeah.

The way you just set that up, I love my family, I've enjoyed living with them, but there's the indicator. Yeah. And upending longstanding cultural traditions are hard, and they take a lot of grace, and they take a lot of gentleness on both sides of those conversations. But if you're ready to go, then, you know what I mean? I'm not going to tell you not to. Are you ready to go? And I don't mean emotionally. We've already determined that. You're ready. But financially, are you ready to go? Can you go now?

Yeah. I mean, again, I'm new and I really never had to, you know, I'm very blessed. I really never had to worry about things myself. I mean, myself personally, I mean, last year I brought home about $120,000. There you go. And this year I'm expected to, yeah, this year I'm expected to, my goals are between $200,000 and $250,000. I'm in commercial real estate, so I don't, you know, hourly. I'm all on commission. Don't mess with Antonio

what do you think their reaction is going to be when you tell them I think you know I don't know it's kind of been this is our childhood home it's where I've lived my whole life we decided to sell it's just kind of been something that

hasn't been easy for all of us but I think that they're open to me doing anything I want, but they would prefer for me to move in with them and obviously continue to save until I could purchase something myself or to buy an investment property that I could live in and hold for the future or something like that. That was the alternative rather than jumping into something right now. Even though I'm financially ready, maybe I could i could yeah but here's what i here's what i hear uh john correct me

i hear you're still worried about disappointing mom and that's it i don't think they're going to jump up and down and get angry i'm not hearing that am i right no you're right yeah so they're not so these are really wonderful people but it's like you but it's like you're still, oh, I don't want to disappoint mom and dad. You know what I mean? So let me give you an example. Often, doing the right thing still hurts. Yeah. Doing the right thing is still hard.

Your parents set up a plan years ago to get a rental property that would one day self-fund itself so they could live in it. And that plan is coming to fruition. And you're still really sad about selling your childhood home. Both and. And they raised a great guy who's killing it. He's got a great future. He's ready to fly. And they would love for him to come move with them. And for you, you're telling us the right thing for you is to get your own place.

You make six figures, brother. I would sign an apartment lease and I'd move and live in an apartment. I rent for a year get my feet under me learn how the world works and then think about getting a house later on and antonio can always go back a couple nights a week for mama's cooking that's right do your laundry no don't do your laundry no just the 23 just just the cooking there you go that's not holding on too long that's one of the perks man just tell mama you're gonna come by at least one night a week for food. Hey, this is The Ramsey Show. Don't move. Welcome back, America.

I'm Kip Coleman. He is Dr. John Deloney. This is The Ramsey Show, where we help you win in your life. We're helping you relationally. We're helping you financially. We're helping you professionally. It's all intertwined. And we want to help you get ahead.

Practical hope coming to you via a free phone call, 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Let's go to Zach who joins us out in sunny Phoenix, Arizona. Zach, how can we help? Hey, I just had a quick question. I am currently working my way through college. I am probably going to graduate here within the next six months to a year, depending on how summer classes line up. Right now, I am a stockbroker with a major brokerage firm, and I also work a second job running deliveries for a laundromat.

And essentially, you know, working the job that I am at the brokerage firm, I want to help people with their finances. But the role that I'm in, there's no advice that we're allowed to provide. Basically, it's just placing orders. So sometimes I feel like a bookie for people that um that are just looking to trade like crazy and not necessarily actually helping people understand their finance and so how would you most like to help people what's that dream gig where you're helping people with their finances what's that look like well that's kind of what i'm calling i mean i would really like to have a job where you know i could sit down and whenever somebody has a question about their money i'm able to help

guide them and give them a plan and have that as work rather than kind of just taking orders all day long and and so the tech issues and whatnot with the website you don't need me to tell you what those opportunities are, but certainly with Ramsey Solutions, we have our smart investor pros, men and women all around the country that are financial advisors on retirement and investment planning and all that. Does that sound like something you want to do to sit down with a family, to sit down with an individual and get their dreams, get their goals all put together, come up with a strategy,

coach them, teach them so they understand how to do it and they can win. Is that what we're talking about? Yeah, essentially. That's exactly what I'm looking for. Yeah, so it's very simple. So if we look at the seven stages that I teach for people to discover and do what they were created to do, get clear as stage one, you're really clear on what you want to do and why you want to do it. Stage two is get qualified. So the question is, what do you need to do to get qualified?

Do you know the answer to that? It's one of two exams that I'll need to take. It depends on what the company does and what the role they're looking for, but it will either need to be probably the certified financial planner or the Series 66. There you go. So here's the deal. Good answer. So you start looking at the company you just mentioned that means you've got one in your head uh you've got one kind of in your mind's eye maybe it's the company you're with

and you're switching roles i don't know but then you look at all other companies and you start looking at those opportunities to get on the ladder that you want to be on and you start looking at what the entry level are uh do Do I have the base qualifications for entry level? Are there a couple levels up from entry level that I'm already qualified for? No, I've got to take one of those two exams that you mentioned, find out exactly what they're looking for, and go get qualified. Now, while you're getting qualified, you're going to be in stage three, which is get connected.

And so you're already a stockbroker. You've got a lot of relationships. So while you're getting that certification that you need, man, you're making connections going, hey, I want to work at company XYZ. I know you work over there. Who's the hiring manager for this position? And so what you begin to do is you begin to make connections so that when you're qualified, opportunities may be waiting for you, or they're not too far off in the distant future. Does that make sense? Yes, it does.

So when making connections, do you recommend using, like, LinkedIn or trying to kind of cold call companies and make connections that way? Not cold call. You have a... I'll tell you something. Okay. Back in my day. Okay.

I'm older than you. When Ken was going to school uphill both ways naked in the snow. Thank you, Kelly. Don't tell everybody. Kelly's in the control room going, oh, I know how old you are. Cold calls were a thing. It's creepy now. Yeah.

And, you know. Okay. So here's the deal. LinkedIn is one option. Let me coach you on LinkedIn. LinkedIn is great for information. I don't like it as the sole connection. Here's what I mean.

Go on LinkedIn. Find all those connections. But instead of sending the LinkedIn email, which I find that nobody actually answers, why don't you then go, wait, I'm going to try to find this person in real life in the form of a phone call, an email connection from a mutual friend or acquaintance. So, yes, Facebook, Instagram, wherever you at or on social media, who are you doing life with?

Do you have social groups? Are you going to a church? Do you referee rec league games? You're a broker right now. Don't you have people that you're making deals for? Most of the calls that I take are cold calls coming in, and it's one-time interaction.

There's not really a relationship. I was thinking not with them, but with coworkers. and you're a student leverage that yeah tell folks i'm a student about to graduate i want to get into this can i take you to coffee and your parents okay uncle larry don't forget uncle larry you know the point is is you have all these acquaintances and you have all these close personal relationships you got to get the word out to them hey i'm looking to get on at company xyz or company abc you know anybody over there and we begin to do the match process so you got this young man you got you are on your way i love it it's that simple i love when the guy goes yep i know what i gotta do to be qualified so you know what it is go get qualified go do it and while you're getting qualified start making connections yes here's the deal john if i want to catch a

train i go to the train station right so if i want to get a job in a certain field i got to start hanging around people that are doing that work or start hanging out in places where you know where i could shadow or i can meet people that are doing that work. We've got to take out all the complexity here. This is about looking for people and places. And I'm going to butcher this quote, but it's from Andrew Huberman, who I just think the world of. He's a professor. He's a medical school professor at Stanford.

He says that we often go to head problems. We try to solve them in our head. You can't do that. If you're wondering and thinking, wondering and thinking isn't going to, you've got to go do. Go reach out and sit down across from somebody and screw it up. Have it be awkward.

Have it fail. Have it be goofy and learn better next time. But just sitting around going, I don't know, I don't know. Go, go. You know what to do to get qualified. Go have coffee. John, I know this.

You're very social. Yeah. At some point you've played six degrees of Kevin Bacon. Yes. This is all people have to do yep so instead of kevin bacon we go i'm looking to find this hiring manager who do i know what are the connections that get me to that hiring manager to where i get a reference or somebody sends an email or text going hey uh let me tell you about this young man zach sharp sharp

stockbroker finishing up school getting his qualifications right now i know him this is how i know him growing up with it watch this kid whatever it is and they get an impression of you all right long before or moments before i don't care before you actually submit the resume and go through the artificial intelligence screening and all the stuff that companies have and nothing nothing in the world feels better than having someone come and say, hey, I think you're doing a great job. I want to be like you someday. I want to sit in this seat someday.

Would you teach me, like, how do you do that? How do you get there? What's the job like? What's the relationship with your family like? Man, that's an incredible question to be asked. Well, you know, you illustrate something that we talk about all the time because one of the questions we get from folks is, how do I connect with somebody that is very successful in the field I want to be in? I don't have anything to offer them.

And I always go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What John just described, folks, is actually tremendously valuable. You made them feel valuable, thus you've offered them value. That's right. And who doesn't love to give their opinion? Especially when you're like you said, you're humble. You go, hey, look, thus you've offered them value. That's right. And who doesn't love to give their opinion, especially when you're like you said. You're humble. Hey, look, I'm at the bottom.

I'm the grasshopper. You're Yoda. I want to be like you, do what you did. I'm here to listen. I'm not here to ask you to do anything for me other than what's the best way to get in? What's the best way to move up based on your experience? What do I need to watch out for? Yeah, landmines. Best part of your day. Worst part of your day.

By the way, the advantage of that conversation beyond connections and knowledge is verification. You sit with somebody who's been doing it a while and actually loves it and they light up across from you and you're going, oh, they're lit up, but I'm not lit up.

That's a warning sign. Or if you're lit up, you go, this is good news. The number of folks that said, I really want to do that job, and I talked to them, they're like, yeah, this is great. You'll never see your wife and kids again. I think, I want that job. I don't want that life. And so let's steer away, right?

Great point. So you learn a lot by just having human interaction with people. I love that. So good. He is Dr. John Delaney. I am Ken Coleman. And this is The Ramsey Show. More coming up right around the corner. Thank you. All right, folks, welcome back to The Ramsey Show.

I'm Ken Coleman, joined by Dr. John Deloney. The phone number to jump in, 888-825-5225, 888-825-5225. Taking your money questions, your relationship questions, your work questions, whatever you got, we're here for you today. You need to find out for yourself. WhyBlinds.com is the number one online retailer of custom window coverage. You get free samples, free shipping, and with the new promos they run every month, you'll save even more. Use the promo code RAMSsey to get the best deal. I'll read the question, John.

Today's question comes from Michelle in Kentucky. While John checks his email, I'll take care of you kind folks. Here you go. I'm working on my master's in public administration with a 3.9 GPA. I value what I accomplished and would like to maintain this GPA through my remaining courses. My career path is teaching at a college level after so maintaining my academic performance is crucial. My husband doesn't view the importance of GPA the way I do and he wants me to get a part-time job. If I go to school full-time without working, I can finish

the degree in about eight months. If I work part-time while finishing the degree, it will take 14 months. Imagining my GPA going down while working and going to school at the same time is beyond horrific to me. My husband says my future employer will also look at my other qualifications so I can afford to go down a bit in the GPA scale. He believes my master's degree is just another piece of paper how can i convince my husband that my chosen career field takes academic performances seriously ouch wow john a lot of emotion dripping off of those uh words this is a first of all before you dive into this because this is clearly a relationship question yes but can we talk about the fact

that there's an assumption here and i'm'm not taking sides here, but there's an assumption that the GPA has to go down. Yes. So the GPA is the proxy here. So just for anyone, you want your professor to have made good grades if they're going to be a professor, right? Absolutely. I want the pilot of my plane to have not wrecked planes, right? To not have crashed. So, yes, if you want to be a professor right absolutely i want the pilot of my plane to have not wrecked planes right does not have crashed yeah so yes it if you want to be a professor someday gpa matters and the gpa has nothing to do with going what's going on here i've got you've got a husband that you don't believe values what you want to do professionally and you don't value

his concerns he wants you to contribute financially and you want to study full-time so this the the the career kin the gpa the part-time those are all proxies to a couple who is on two different pages and this is one of those things that you got to hold the presses and y'all got to sit down and talk about where our relationship so we So we got two fears here, John. Tell me if I'm wrong. We've got she's afraid of the GPA going down if she works part-time. Yep. He's afraid if she goes full-time school that their budget's going to be too tight or that life is going to suck unimaginably.

They have two fears competing. Those are the two proxy fears. The two real fears are either i my wife's gonna be smarter than me my wife's going to i don't want to lose her to graduate school i miss the old fun crazy us and now she's studying all the time that's the fear her fear is i don't want to my gpa to go down i worked full-time through all my graduate school and i got a 4-0 in graduate school not undergrad but in grad school so that's not a true statement here. What is a true statement is your husband doesn't respect what you're doing. You haven't told your husband, this is why this is important to me. This is what

I want to do. Or maybe you have, and he's blowing you off. And so how can I convince my husband that I'll just stop the answer that you can't, you can't convince somebody of something else. In fact, we're in a world now where if you put data on the table it just further entrenches somebody in their other position no matter what yeah if you say on twitter that the sun is hot you'll have four people reply instantly and go well it's technically not true right and then you'd say well here it's 118 degrees in in town right now, and they'd go, yeah, see, that's the problem. It doesn't matter what you put on the table. I agree.

So all it says, this isn't a conversation about data and facts. This is a conversation about relationship. And this is you saying not how can I convince you, but let me tell you what I'm experiencing right now. I'm experiencing a tug, a tension between what I want to do and my husband not respecting what I want to do. And the path it's going to take me

to get there. Sit down, have a hard conversation. And just talk about your fears and your dreams and let's match them up. Because this is not that hard to solve. No. But appreciate the questions. Well, it is hard to solve if one of you is an idiot, and that happens a lot. If one of you is a bonehead or like...

Well, of course. Everything's hard to solve if you're an idiot. That's true. John, thank you for the salient, salient advice and wisdom there. I'll be here all week. Let's go to John now in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. John, how can we help? Hi, guys.

Good afternoon, and thank you for taking my call. I am a, um, lifelong Dave Ramsey learner and been since, uh, back in the total money makeover days, um, came out of the city as a kid and went into the military and, uh, went to college afterwards. And I have zero debt, uh, at this point in my life. I am a Baby Steps millionaire. Very cool. And I bought the book just recently before Christmas because I'm reading it so that I can highlight it and share it with my two children. Very cool. And give that as a gift to them.

You know, I'm really excited about that. My question, though, today is I am, as I said, I'm debt-free. I'm thinking my youngest just started college this year. I have about $450,000 in cash at this point. I owe $185,000 on my home. I am ready to transition my life in the next two years. My daughter is a junior in college and moved my way down to Florida, and I'm thinking about buying a condo in Florida now, but I'm wondering whether I should use part of the cash

that I have to pay off my mortgage first, even though I'm probably only going to be in my house for about two more years. I'm not sure which direction to go in there. I'm wondering if you guys can give me some advice. How much is the house worth that you're considering selling? $400,000. $400,000, okay. What's the holdup on the time? Why are you waiting two years? I want her to get through.

She's going to a local community college for her first two years and then going to the University of Tampa for her last two years. So once she transfers down to Tampa, I'll be more comfortable being in that area. I just recently got licensed down there as well, my professional license down there within the last few months. So I'm trying to get a little bit of experience on my resume before I make that move as well. All right, so two things I'll put on the table here.

Number one is I think it's worth doing the math. The math being what would, if she finishes up this year and y'all sell the house in may what would it cost to send her to college one year versus putting more money down in this current house that you have are you actually saving money when you look at your entire financial picture okay and would it be ultimately in the long run would you save more money if you sold your current house and didn't dump 180 grand into it y'all all moved down to florida if y'all gonna move together and you went ahead and moved her a year early and got her out of community college and went that so that's one route okay that's just a math problem

what i'll tell you is after working with thousands and thousands of college students over the years every college student I meet has a four-year plan rarely does that plan work out that way and so while you are thinking ahead okay in a couple years she wants to transition to Tampa and I would go ahead if I'm you and I'd pay my house off yeah I would live in the now as though this thing's going to be forever and if you end up doing it in two years, sell your house in wherever you are in Philly and then move to Florida. That's what I would do. I'd go ahead and act as though, cool, honey, that's great. Let's make some plans for it.

You've got license. You're starting to lean that way. But the chances of her saying, well, I met somebody. I want to stay in Philadelphia. Or there's a great program, and they're offering a transfer scholarship for this, or I want to go to NYU instead. Whatever the thing is, that happens so much.

And so I'd live in the now. John, do you believe that paying off the house now gives you more options? Not really. I think I'm almost of the mindset that the market is so hot right now and my house value is probably, it's up there. But quite honestly, I think the best thing I could do right now, what I really could do is sell my house and rent something down closer to the beach for a year or so until I figure out what happens. So by selling it, you pay it off. That's exactly right. So I do that. I think it's a great option.

I love that option. That's where you're leaning and we like it. I love that option. think it's a great option. I love that option. That's where you're leaning, and we like it. I love that option. Do it. Yep. And then you're free, and then you can buy when you want to. Yeah. I love that. Really good stuff. Thank you so much for the call, John.

Hey, I want to thank our producer, Ben Hill, and our associate producer and call screener, Jenna Sears, and my colleague, John Maloney. But mostly I want to thank you, America. We do the show for you, And this is The Ramsey Show. Have a friend or family member that needs a daily dose of Ramsey advice in their life? Let them know about the Ramsey Call of the Day podcast. It's a quick hit of advice about life and money in under 10 minutes. Check out the Ramsey Call of the Day podcast. It's a quick hit of advice about life and money in under 10 minutes. Check out the Ramsey Call of the Day podcast

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