The Ramsey Show - App - What Red Flags Should I Look for in a Relationship? (Hour 1)

Episode Date: October 15, 2020

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host on the air this hour. Open phones here as we talk about your life and your money. The phone number is 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Let's head straight to the phones and talk to Eric in Illinois.

Hi, Eric. How are you? I'm good, Dave. Thanks for taking my call. Sure, man. What's up? I am currently about $90,000 in unsecured credit card debt. I'm 14 months done with a debt settlement program through a company.

Oh, no. And I'm starting to second guess whether or not I should have done this and what are my options. Should I withdraw from the program? Should I continue doing what I'm doing? Should I file bankruptcy? It's $90,000 in credit cards. Yes.

You've been with them nine months, so you're nine months at least. I'm sorry? 14 months. 14 months. I'm sorry. So you're at least 14 months behind, right? Yes. Because you stopped paying least 14 months behind, right? Yes. Because you stopped paying them and so did they.

Correct. And then they've been taking a payment from you every month and they're building it up to make lump sum offers and try to settle after they put you into default on every one of these. Right? Correct. Yeah. These people suck.

They're complete scam artists. And then worse than that, that's the theory of how it's supposed to work, but worse than that, they haven't actually followed through and gotten the settlements done, and they don't return your calls or emails. Is that right? Sounds about right, yes. Okay. Yeah, you've got to stay on them.

Yeah, they're incompetent. They never have an answer for you when you call them back. Yeah, they're incompetent, and they don't care, and they've not executed on what they promised, and what they promised to start with was a bad plan. But they haven't even executed on that, and that's what we run into. Man, I'm so sorry. I can hear it in your voice, man.

You were trying to get help. What is your household income? On the books, I make probably about $70. What's that mean? What does off the books mean? Well, I also deliver pizzas, and I probably make about $2,000 a month take home with that. Okay, so we're dealing with $100,000. Are you single?

Yes. Okay. And other debt that you have other than this $90,000? Nothing. I don't know if it was a bad thing or not, but I just paid off my Snap-on-Tool account, which was $1,600, and my car, which was $1,600. So I don't have any other debt out there. What do you do for a living?

I'm a diesel mechanic. Oh, okay. That's the Snap-on tools. Okay. Good. So you're paying cash for that stuff from now on, as you do need tools to do your business. Good news is diesel mechanic can make some money. Why aren't you doing more diesel mechanicing than delivering pizzas?

You'd make more money on your side hustle. Yeah, I don't really have a good answer for that, except that I haven't found anything that I can do part-time or... Yeah, okay, or shade tree. Yeah, shade tree or whatever okay yeah i'd be poking around looking for that because you as you know you're a pretty valuable commodity i mean i know diesel mechanics that that when they're cranking it up they're doing working a bunch of hours but they're making 100k and so you're making 100 you're making 100k but you're

doing it through pizzas and doing it the hard way so So, all right, so here's the deal, okay? If you file bankruptcy, what will occur is, of course, your credit is destroyed. Oh, hello, your credit's already destroyed, right? It's about a 560. You're in default, and you're on $90,000 worth of credit cards for 14 months. Your credit's screwed. Agreed? Agreed.

Okay. Bankruptcy will, I mean, maybe it's an 8 out of 10, and bankruptcy is a 10 out of 10. So you'll just finish it off, but it's already on its last legs. So we're not worried about your credit. That's not our goal number one. Goal number one is for Eric to get his life back from all of these shysters that you've gotten involved with,

from credit card companies to debt relief companies. So if you file bankruptcy, it makes it go away, and the credit is destroyed. So Chapter 7 bankruptcy is a possibility. I view bankruptcy from a moral perspective to be like divorce sometimes it happens to good people but i would if i were there and i went through a bankruptcy in my 20s uh and so i've experienced the hell that it is it's not a fun process um it's an anal exam you won't like it. The, you know, it's just, it's bad. And so, but aside from that, I would want to know from a character standpoint that I had done everything I could to save my marriage and then some more before I actually went through a divorce.

I'd want to know, and I did, I left it all on the field. I had no regrets. I had done everything I knew how to do before I filed. And so that's how I'm going all on the field. I had no regrets. I had done everything I knew how to do before I filed. And so that's how I'm going to answer the question. If I were you, I would file bankruptcy only after I've done everything I could do. Now, I can give you some stuff to try if you want to do that. Yes, I'm willing to listen and try. Call debt relief people up and tell them they get no more money

and you're not working with them anymore. Cancel it. Okay. So how much have you been sending them a month? $11.45. And how much can you scrape together if you go hog wild and crazy? Can you save $3,000 a month? Definitely.

I just started doing your budget app in the last couple weeks i just started listening to you in the last couple weeks okay so what we're going to do is make a list of these credit about make a list of these credit cards smallest to largest you're not going to pay them anymore you've already quit paying them they're already in default we're going to leave them there that'll keep them somewhat pliable i think that over the next 12 months you can settle this for somewhere around 25 cents on the dollar so somewhere around twenty thousand dollars makes you free but it's going to entail a lot of hours of you on the phone with absolute morons called credit card collectors and negotiating with them okay so you call. What's your smallest credit card?

Probably $6,000. I don't have exact numbers. Okay, let's just make that. We'll use that as our example. That's your smallest one. You call them up, and you say, I have $2,000. Do you want it? I have $90,000 in other credit card companies.

If you don't want it, I'm going to call the next guy on the list. Do you want it or not? As settlement in other credit card companies. If you don't want it, I'm going to call the next guy on the list. Do you want it or not? As settlement in full for this debt. And you begin to argue with them, and you get them to $2,000, 30 cents on the dollar, 20 cents on the dollar. In lump sum cash. You can only do that as you pile up the cash each month at $3,000 or $4,000 a month, right? Right.

Making sense to you? Yeah. So you settle the smallest one one then you sell the next smallest one i really think you can settle this for around twenty twenty five thousand dollars and i think you're debt free in a year and your credit will begin to heal after that and you're not bankrupt you just need a plan now you've got a lot of heartache dealing with credit card collectors for the next year they're a pain in the butt you're not dealing with intelligent life it for the next year. They're a pain in the butt. You're not dealing with intelligent life. It's the island of misfit toys.

It's a problem. Get it in writing every time you do this, and do not give them electronic access to your checking account. I'm going to walk with you, Eric. We're going to give you Ramsey Plus Financial Peace and a financial counselor to help you for free for the next year. We're going to get you out of this if you'll walk it. I'll show you how. Hold on. GRIP6 Belts Folks, I love telling you about well-made, well-thought-out products.

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Grip 6 is determined to help build and modernize american manufacturing to learn more and get this month's dave ramsey special visit grip6.com that's grip6.com Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, my co-host on the air. Couldn't have told it by the last segment because you were enthralled by debt relief companies. I didn't know. My brother used to be a herpetologist at a zoo and i thought that's the only place where snakes lived i didn't know they also had jobs where they attacked people who were had gotten in over their heads on things man herpetologist hey man we got a the deloney family you got some characters you guys are uh no i mean you're that's that's i mean i just i would

i didn't know what it was, so I would have been impressed. My brother's a stud. My brother's a herpetologist. Hey, so. My brother's not. You talked about, you kind of hinted at the hell that is bankruptcy. Yeah. Walk me through that from my nerd world.

The toll it takes on your soul, on a marriage. Like, what does it do to the country? You can probably tell me more than I can tell you. Shame and vulnerability. If you think about the list, you've seen the list, we've all seen it, and it's probably somewhat statistically true that out of these 10 things, if four of them happen to you in 12 months, you're in real danger. Of hurting yourself, right. Yeah. of them happen to you in 12 months you're in real danger of hurting yourself right yeah it's a i mean like the loss of a spouse a loss of a child a loss of a long career job the uh a long hospital

stay bankruptcy divorce those kinds of you know you get this list of horrible things that happen to people right well bankruptcy and divorce are on that list. Right. And so they're a little different than a medical problem, obviously. But, you know, a house fire, losing your home to fire is on that list. Devastating emotionally. So what does that do that's different than, I guess, a less minor trauma? It's an emotional trauma, isn't it? Yeah, but it feels like a bankruptcy would be somebody calling you out as a failure to yourself right it's like this it's surrender though i mean yeah it's complete i'm lost when you when you walk out of your marriage that's how

you feel that's i suppose i've never been through that that's exactly right but the like when you have a divorce you're fired from a job but you the thing about losing a job losing losing your marriage is you have the loss right you grieve the loss but there's this other more insidious thing there which is you don't trust yourself anymore bankruptcy same way yeah and that's that's what i'm asking i've never been through it yeah that's the same way i felt like it destroyed i mean i was arrogant, cocky. I was powder. It ground me to powder after that. And it took me forever to get to where I had a sense of confidence again.

And part of what allowed me to do that was finding these biblical financial truths, something that I could have confidence in that was beyond my own intellect. Right. Because my own intellect got me into a mess. Right. Academia, what it taught me about own intellect got me into a mess. Right. Academia, what it taught me about money, got me into a mess. Right. And so I couldn't, that was a shifting sand.

That's exactly right. I couldn't build on that. And so I found an anchor point. That helped me get confidence in that. And then I regained, and then it started functioning, regained confidence in myself. But it's a self-esteem destroyer. Now, people say it's not.

They say, ah, that was an easy divorce. But always call bs on that 100 of the time you know that was easy that was it was it's just a one of those things 100 of the time i tried that business idea it just didn't work out just lost everything we lost our house but yeah it's just a house we get into the house and that's that's just bravado bs that's exactly right yeah because it hurts and that will come out in other places yeah it's it's one of those things that says you know for the rest of your life i'm a person that went through a divorce for the rest of your life i'm a person that filed bankruptcy one of the big failures so give me one or two baby steps no pun intended that you would like the day after you look around and who you were, not what you had, who you were is powder. What's the little win to start walking your way back out of that?

I think it's the benefit that I got from it personally. I think it was I figured out I was not what I own. I figured out I was not what I do. It's the difference in being and doing. And so we put our having, we put our identity in what we own or what we do. What do you do for a living? Guys are like, what do you do? First question. First question. What do you do? Well, it don't matter. Right.

And what do you own? It don't matter. Right. Because there's never been a rider truck following a hearse. ain't taking it with you that's exactly right so you know all that stuff right so you go back through that but and and so um that's why i don't want somebody to file bankruptcy the other reason i want to file is they oftentimes can work through it you got a guy they're making 100 grand for 20 grand he could clean this mess up that's right and a lot of crap he's gonna put have a lot of uncomfortable nasty conversations with stupid people right but 20 000 bucks out of 100 000 a year he could be debt free

in a year in 12 months he will have experience that the sun keeps coming up every day yeah and then 12 months he's he's done yeah he shook hands and he squared up with those folks and whatever he bought on that stuff he'll never do it again that's right he'll never do it again there's too much cost i'm fascinated by the the and i've had a few of these experiences in my life at a at a more minor level but when you lose trust in your own decision making yeah right you have nowhere to go but the mirror it's a different kind of trauma it is yeah because anxiety works the same way. It's like being betrayed by your own body. You know in your head there's nothing happening here, but your heart's racing.

You're having an anxiety attack. Yeah. You can't breathe. You're frustrated. And you know it's not real. Yeah. But your body's just run off down the road on you, right? But it's the same thing sitting in a horror movie.

I know it's not real, but it still scares the crap out of me. That's exactly right. Yeah. That's why I don't go horror movie. I know it's not real, but it still scares the crap out of me. That's exactly right. Yeah. That's why I don't go to them. I get scared. Brad's in Ohio. Hey, Brad, welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Hey, how's it going, Dave?

Appreciate you and Dr. Deloney having me on. Sure. How can we help? Well, my question is in regards to, I guess, red flags or kind of pitfalls you can fall into when you're looking for a partner or a spouse or just dating in general. I mean, I'm 28 years old. I just recently moved to Ohio, took a 30% pay increase, and made the decision to live with my sister and brother-in-law in their basement so I could pay off my debt. And I've gone from $50,000 in debt to $30,000 now. Good for you.

In the course of four months, yeah. But I'm starting to date, and aside from living in my sister's basement. That's a great first line, right? Hey, what's up? Yes. I'm Brad. I live in my sister's basement. Now, I know you're probably going to tell me that the right person would understand, the right woman would understand the situation and be more than accommodating. But in general, what are some things to look out for?

Because I don't want to fall into one of those circumstances, like you guys were just discussing, where you know, I'm a statistic where bankruptcy leads to divorce and so on and so forth. So are there any indicators early on in a relationship when you first start dating that could, you know, could provide some insight and, you know, where you could, could not fall into that pitfall? Dr. John. Hmm. I would quote our good friend Henry Cloud on that, which is when somebody decides they are all in on you, somebody decides they want to get to know you, they have a picture of you in their life. And that can be after one date and two dates. That doesn't mean you go get married, but they start saying, I want to be with this person. There's not games and there's not shenanigans and there's not hoops and trials. There is a genuine desire to get, to be connected with somebody, to learn about them, to be with them, not over them,

not about them, but for them. And so I, I always, I'm not one that believes there's one person for everybody. I think to have a good marriage, you wake up every day and decide, I'm going to love this person with all I got.

I'm going to do the best I can with the tools I got today. When I screw up, I'm going to say I'm sorry. And that marriage is a daily decision that I'm going to love, I'm going to love, I'm going to love. And so I think for you, you have to list out what the values are, who you're looking for, what you want to be a part of. And then you've got to work as hard as you can to be for somebody. And that person's got to be for somebody. And that's what I'd be for for you. And once it does get serious, I'd spend some time in pre-marriage counseling.

There's a lot of statistical data that says a good in-depth pre-marriage counseling is highly correlated with success on marriage. And because it forces you to look at what we call the four things that are out there. And if you can find out that you're largely in agreement on these four areas, you've got a good shot. And that's money, in-laws, religion, and kids. If you can be largely in agreement on those four things, you're going to go a long way. And lastly, I've heard it said that if she says she's not crazy, it usually means she is. So move on. That's at the point, Brad, when you tell her you live in your sister's basement.

And that will clear itself up for you. I'm not crazy. I'm not crazy. Oh, good. I'm glad. Next date. Oh! This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you. In the lobby of Ramsey Solutions on the Debt Free Stage, Kristen is with us.

Hi, Kristen. How are you? I'm doing well. How are you, Dave? I am better than I deserve. Welcome to Nashville. Where are you from? Springfield, Missouri. Oh, cool. And how much debt have you paid off? Just over $40, Missouri. Oh, cool. And how much debt have you paid off? Just over $40,000. Okay, good for you. How long did this take?

21 months. Good for you. You did it quick. And your range of income during that time? Between 50 and 57. And I did sell my house in that time frame. Oh, okay, cool. So how much of the $40,000 was paid off because of the sale of the house?

Anything? $21,000. Oh, okay, so half of it. And the rest of,000 was paid off because of the sale of the house? Anything? $21,000. Oh, okay, so half of it. And the rest of it you did about $1,000 a month then? Yep. Good. Good for you. Congratulations.

Well done. What do you do for a living? I am a campus director of a health and wellness school. Okay. So where are you living since you sold your house? In an apartment. Ah, you're a renter. Yes.

Okay. So what kind of debt was the $40,000? Normal stuff. Student loans, credit cards, car, Christmas a couple years before I paid off. Okay. So walk me through this. You're bebopping along. Everything seems to be okay. And 21 months ago, something lights your fuse. What happened? It was about December of 2017 that my brother and I were at my parents' house for Christmas. And he gave me a hard dose of reality. We were looking at my budget, and he said, you've got to make a change.

You make a decent living, but you have nothing to show for it. Wow. And it was one of those moments. Is this your big brother or your little brother? My big brother. Okay. So you guys got a good relationship because he could bust you. Yeah.

Yep. He and his wife have gone through this journey and my parents have been supportive as well okay all right so they were a little bit enthusiastic financial peace graduates and he steps on little sister and says you got to get it yes i got you okay good i like this guy all right he loves his sister well so he calls you out and then happened? And then he and his wife bought me an FPU kit, and so I took the class at my church. About a few weeks into that, my daughter was with me at the classes, and she cut up my credit cards during our class.

Wow. And then I decided I'm going to sell my house because I can make a huge dent in my debt. And so it's just her and I, and so it gave me the opportunity to simplify, downsize, and we made it happen. And I sold my house a month later and I'm now fully funded my emergency fund. Look at you. Wow. So how old is your daughter? Nine. So how poignant is that when your own nine-year-old is cutting up your credit cards in financial peace class uh it was that makes me cry yeah and she's she listens to the podcast with me she has financial peace junior she started a side

hustle making bracelets so you've changed the trajectory of your kid yes yes wow and so we have a we have a deal that whatever she saves up for her car, I'll match it. So there's going to be some skin in the game. There you go. I like it. That's a 401 Dave. That's what we did at our house. We matched it, baby.

That's good. You've done so good. Thank you. I mean, your whole perspective on this subject and your actions and your behaviors and your beliefs have all changed completely. Yes. I'm so proud of you. Thank you. It comes from your principles. You did a great job. You did a great completely. Yes. I'm so proud of you. Thank you. It comes from your principles.

You did a great job. Wow. You got to feel considerably different. It's so freeing. It's empowering. Just having conversations with people sitting in the hot tub at the apartment complex and they're like, I'm so broke. I have nothing. And I'm like, you don't have to make a lot of money to be free. You just, you have to have a budget. You have to make a plan and you have to stick to it. And it can happen. You've turned into your brother. Yes.

It's an everyday conversation just in general. It's going to be a great conversation. Some guy's going to be like, hey, listen, this lady in the hot tub was telling me. It's going to be fantastic. You're going to be on the debt-free stage one of these days. That's exactly right. This lady in the hot tub of the apartment. Hey, so tell me this.

What encouraged you to bring your daughter along on this? I want to leave a legacy for her, and I want her to know that you can do it. You have to set a plan. And just to know that you don't have to live in debt. I mean, I don't have a payment to make other than my normal living expenses. And yes, I would love to have a new car. I just got crazy hail damage on my car and it's a 2013. So I saved the money and I want to get a new one, but I don't want a payment. So until I can save up for it, it's, it's the Honda fit all day. Yeah. And I know, you know, this Rachel Cruz says it best with more is caught than taught.

But a lot of parents take the easy way out and they just, they bark at their kids. They ask them to do things. They yip-yap at their children all day long. And you did the legacy shifting thing,

which is you took that baby girl that I'm looking at right now by the hand and let her walk with you. You handed her a pair of scissors and you said, together no more. And man, you're talking about 100 years from now

because great-grandma decided to do something different. The whole family lives different. Yeah, we have it on video, and we put those credit cards in a clear Christmas ornament, and I put 2018 on it. And so now we know 2018 was the year that mom cut up her credit cards. Good for you. I love it. You got it dialed in. it and so now we know 2018 was the year that mom cut up her credit cards good for you good for you i love it you got it dialed in yeah so you go from getting called out to your brother to

actually doing it to now you're calling out people in the hot tub you've gone through the full transition gone through the full transition and the uh so what do you tell people the key to getting out of debt is you did it you have to stay focused of debt is? You did it. You have to stay focused. You have to have a plan. I have a vision board on the side of my fridge. It's been sitting there for a while, and it's just a reality check. But you have to stay focused and know your why. My daughter's my why. And just freedom and get her college ready

and just be able to move forward and not feel the pressure of payments every month. Man, that's amazing. Way to go. Thank you. Congratulations. So I guess your brother and your mom were big cheerleaders. Yes, my parents and my brother and sister-in-law and I have some friends back in Springfield, Michelle and Duann were going through, had taken classes as well. And so just supportive people and taking friends to go to Panera and write a budget together, that kind of stuff, just to keep accountability. My daughter keeps me in check too. I said, Lexi, we're not going to, we're not going to eat out this week. And maybe we'll think about celebrating at one point. And I was taking her home one day after, after work and school.

And I said, I'm so exhausted. Let's go get some Chinese food. She goes, mom, remember, we're not eating out. We're eating at home. Oh, man. So reality check from the nine-year-old. Game on. Game on. Well done. So proud of you, hero. Thank you. Well done. Thank you very much. You've made a change in our lives. So I really appreciate it. We showed you how. You did it. I'm so proud of you. All right. So you brought your daughter with you. What's her name? Her name is Lexi. Lexi is nine years old, right? Yes. All right, beautiful.

All right, life is good. Well, we got a copy of Chris Hogan's book for you, Everyday Millionaires, because that for sure is the next chapter in your story. Lexi, probably of everyday multi-millionaires. Yeah, dude, Lexi's not messing around. If you could say no to chinese food at age eight you you could do anything you've won that level of self-discipline touchdown you've won way to go we're not going out to eat mom i'm changing my family tree that's incredible awesomeness

awesomeness all right kristin lexi you've been practicing? Yes, we have. All right. You know the debt-free screen? Yes. All right. Here we go. Kristen and Lexi from Springfield, Missouri. $40,000 paid off in 21 months, including the sale of a home. $50,000 to $57,000 income. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one.

We're debt-free! Woo! Yeah! Dream. Three, two, one. We're dead free. Woo. Yeah. Yeah. Unbelievable. Unbelievable. One of the things that we do around here, of course, I cry at an Applebee's commercial.

I do too. Two old men cry at an applebee's commercial but one of the things crying at the table here dave one of the things that that we do around here that makes me cry are those things but when rachel tells the story about i was that little girl oh man she was born the year we filed bankruptcy and she tells that story from stage i've heard it she's done it hundreds of times yeah i cry every time she does that huh because stage. I've heard it. She's done it hundreds of times. Yeah. I cry every time she does that. Huh. Because that was the year our family tree changed. She was born the year we filed bankruptcy.

And it was such a milestone. And that Christmas ornament, that is a valuable family heirloom right there. That's right. And Lexi, your kids are going to have that ornament on their tree. Amen. And it's going to go down generation after generation because of what you did. That's a million-dollar ornament. Ornament.

This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you. Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey Personality, is my co-host today here on the show. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host. Open phones at 888-825-5225. Christopher's in Charlotte, North Carolina. Hi, Christopher. How are you? I'm doing well. How are you doing?

Better than I deserve. How can we help? Yeah, I was just going to ask you, if you were in my position, what would you do? I'm living at home. I'm 27. I'm delivering pizzas. I got about $9,800 in student loan debt and I got about $29,000 in savings. You have $9,800 in student loan debt, you have $29,000 in savings, and your only job is pizza delivery?

Yeah, I have a Lyft and Uber that I've done from time to time. I used it to help pay off my car, but I'm not doing that anymore now that my car's paid off. I don't want to put all the miles on it. So what are you going to do with your life uh i would really enjoy to go back to school um with my degrees right now they're not uh marketable for a good career um i'd love to go back to school and study human resources uh this program i got in mind and uh I've just been saving up for that. What's your degree in? Psychology and political science.

So what can't you do with a psychology degree? I feel like I definitely could go down the route of human resources. I feel like eventually, though, to get a better advantage, I believe getting a master's degree would hold a lot more. Bull crap. Credibility. Absolute bull crap. You don't believe so?

Okay. I run a $250 million company. No one in my HR department has a master's degree no kidding and they're awesome too by the way they're great and i don't think any of them even have an hr degree armando might our director of hr might i don't know my original director of hr did not i know that um no you you've got what it takes to get in there you need to get your foot in the door and if you want to go pick up some classes some one-off classes and audit some classes just to get some knowledge on hr that would be advisable but i don't think you need to go back and get a four-year degree in hr plus a

master's in order to be able to be in hr i'm positive the game man get in the game yeah it's time to get in the game i would pay off my student loans yesterday. And I'd move out the next day. Yeah. And go get a job in HR. Go get your foot in the door, entry-level position recruiter or something else in HR. Get started and get with a company that will pick up some of your tuition and go start doing some study at night instead of delivering pizzas with them paying for it. My sister's a recruiter. She does remarkably well. Recruiters make bank.

She is awesome. She knows the business she knows well but um she's got a bachelor's degree and she's smarter than me 10 times and so man you got to get in the game dude master's degree in human resources no she's got a bachelor's degree a bachelor's yeah i'm just saying she's yeah she's a rock star but she put the work in she works real hard and you got to get in the game, brother. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is a – you have a perceived blockage, a blocker here that's not real. Right. It's not a real blocker, Christopher. But get your foot in the door and get stirring it up. Hang on.

I'm going to give you a copy of Ken Coleman's book, The Proximity Principle. And if I were you, I would get started tomorrow on all of that. I'd pay off my student loan today i'd make plans to move out you got plenty of cash you're in a good shape go get you you know you can work the part-time gigs if you have to to pay bills for a little while until you land the job but i would go get an hr position uh somewhere that you'd love working and again use ken's material king coleman can help you land that job king coleman.com there's all kinds of get the interview get the resume stuff right.

All of it's free and downloadable, and I'm going to give you his book. So we've given you everything that he's got, and he can help you land that for sure. So, Chris, if you hear what just happened is Dave Ramsey just called your bluff. He just called his bluff, man. And so now he's taking all the excuses off the table, all of the, well, you know, I'm just stuck with my degrees. Nope. It's over, dude.

Here's the book. Here's the resources. Here's the high five. Go get them. And I'll tell Dave, his HR department here is extraordinary. Our HR department, they're excellent. They are. Excellent at what they do.

They are. There may be 17 of them with master's degrees. I don't know. I really don't. But they were not hired for master's degrees, and they were not kept from doing something of them with master's degrees. I don't know. I really don't. But they were not hired for master's degrees, and they were not kept from doing something because of a master's degree. I mean, I cannot think of anybody over there that even has an HR degree, much less a master's degree. They might.

One of them might. But, I mean, you know, again, HR is about taking care of the team. Love people. Loving the team and hiring the team right hanging on to recruiting and taking care and loving the team and and you know a psychology degree will assist you in that a big heart will assist you in that caring about people assist you in that and then god help you somewhere along the way you're going to learn something about the law as well but um but the uh the rest of it is you know there's no there's no technique that they're going to teach you in a master's degree that allows you to be unless you want to work in a cold toxic corporate environment then

you might need a master's degree but i don't think that's going to be your goal you need to get jobs where you go in and look at people here's another thing christopher can do is when he delivers pizzas in the evenings as he's grinding through trying to get his foot in the door in another position, he can take those 30-second, those one-minute exchanges and learn how to read somebody, learn how to be kind to somebody, learn how to make somebody's day. When I worked at Burger King at the front register, I learned at a young age

it takes about 10 seconds to make somebody's day or to ruin it. Yep. Right. And that lesson as a 16 year old kid has, has, has ridden with me all the way through is treat people with dignity, get to know somebody that fast, um, honor somebody, give them what they need and step back. Those kinds of little personal skills, those investments in people loving every person you come in contact with, that's going to make you a great HR person down the road. Beyond a whole other program, man. Six, four years.

So you know what a nail apron is? I do not. You don't? No. You never wore a nail apron? Nope. It's a little thing you get at Home Depot or something. Ties around the back.

Okay. Got two little pockets in the front. Okay. You put your nails in it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Put your nails in it if you're driving nails and, you know and you're doing carpentry, right? So pizza guy number one pulls up in front of our house, honks his horn, won't even get out of the car. Nope.

I got to go outside, down the stairs, give him his money. He gets no or one level of Dave tip. I got to give a tip because it's Dave. Right. I don't have a choice. Right. But, I mean, what a jerk. Pizza guy number two knocks on the door.

This is his third trip to the house. He's got a nail apron. Steps back three steps from the door so that his presence is not intimidating if the lady of the house happens to answer the door, or for that matter, if anyone. Because if you're all up in the grill too close, that physical presence is wrong. You know what's in the nail apron? Dog biscuits.

No way. For my dog. Well played, man. You give my dog a dog biscuit. You didn't crowd the space. You're smiling and happy. The pizza's hot. You didn't crowd the space. You're smiling and happy. The pizza's hot. You're happy to be here. Guess who gets the tip bigger than the stinking pizza, you know?

Right. I mean, what ingenuity. Well, and the ingenuity is just I'm going to honor the person I'm serving a meal to, right? Yeah. And I don't know when that, Dave, I don't know when that became a move, right? When we had to start teaching people, hey, you're bringing somebody a meal. You've got a noble thing you're doing here. You're taking somebody dinner.

Do it with a smile on your face. You're helping somebody out. Be joyful. Be a good person to be around. Be a kind person. Bring a dog biscuit. Can you imagine thei on the dog biscuits man oh god man this guy's yeah five dollar thing a dog biscuits two dollar for a nail apron right

and he made that back in one stop anywhere there's a dog i don't know what you do with a cat but oh well there you go well i've got my own thing about cats because i don't know anything about i don't know what you do the cat anyway other than i know people on the internets don't like people who talk about their cats. I'm just going to keep my mouth shut. Oh, really? I'm not a cat guy, Dave. I didn't know anything about the internet. I don't either.

They tell me so. I'm going to stay off it. We can just talk about your lovely dog. Yeah, that's it. Well, he has an underbite, so those dog biscuits are a problem. But it was still a great gesture. There's a 100% chance the next time I come to your house, I'm bringing a dog treat. A nail apron and a dog biscuit.

I'm not wearing an apron to your house, but I will put some in my pocket. I love it. You got to get the Sharon's heart. I'm just saying. You can get a tip out of even Sharon doing that. You know, there you go. Oh, that puts us out of the Dave Ramsey show

mercifully in the books. This is James Childs, producer of the Dave Ramsey show. On your smart speaker, you can add our skill by saying Alexa, open the Ramsey Network skill. From there, you can listen to all our shows. Ask Dave money questions like, how do I invest my money?

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