The Ramsey Show - App - Where There's Clarity With Your Money, There's Freedom (Hour 3)

Episode Date: October 18, 2021

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Thank you. Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studio, it's The Ramsey Show, where America hangs out to have a conversation about your life and money and purpose and calling and career and all of the questions you need answered. I'm George Campbell, joined today by my pal, Ken Coleman, and we are taking your calls, and it's a free one. 888-825-5225. 888-525- Wait, I did it wrong, Ken. You just forgot a two.

888-825-5225. There it is. It happens. It's simple, but it's complex. Yeah. It's burned in my brain. And we are taking your calls, and we're going to open this hour with our friend Scott in Indianapolis, Indiana. Scott, welcome to The Ramsey Show. Thank you.

My wife and I have not necessarily disagreement, but just trying to get guidance on how much for a new car is appropriate to spend. Okay. Talk us through this. What's your financial situation? Well, we're debt-free, and we'd be paying with cash. And we generally drive cars into the ground. So I've had mine for 12 years, and I bought it two years. It was two years old when I bought it, and looking at stepping up a bit. But a lot's changed in the world in 12 years since we've bought a car.

So just trying to get a handle on how much to spend. What are you looking at? I'd like to get an Alfa Romeo. Whoa. Hey now. Which, you know, it's a pretty car. Now, I currently drive a 5 Series BMW, but I got the tax appraisal, and it's worth like $4,000 now.

I'm like, well, maybe I need a new car because I've had this one for 12 years. How much is the Alfa Romeo you're looking at? I'd be about $90. Oh, okay. All right, and you've got the cash to pay for it. Yes. Where are you guys at in the baby steps? Have you been following that plan?

You said you're debt-free. Do you have a paid-for house? Yes, yes. So I first heard Dave in 1998. Wow. And I've been following the plan since then. So we have a net worth of about $3.5 million.

That changes the equation, my friend. What's your income currently? Probably about $500,000 a year. $500,000 a year? Yeah. Your wife is saying $90,000 because you've lived like no one else.

I mean, it's unbelievable. So what's the disagreement here, Scott? She just doesn't like the price tag or what? Is she saying it's too much? Well, yeah. I mean, you know, our first house was only like $200,000. And, you know, and we've been looking at cars,

and a lot of the cars don't cost what they cost 12 years ago. Granted, this is a really nice car, but... She's emotionally grappling with the fact that a car could cost $90,000, and you want it. Yeah, I think that's it. What's the number that she's okay with? If 90's a bit much in her eyes, what's the number she goes, I'm fine with this number? Well, yeah, I'm trying, in case she hears this later, I don't want to hear it from her.

But I spent $30,000 on the last car, and so she's like, well, why not spend $35,000? But that doesn't go as far as it used to. No. And it's a percentage of our net worth. We're worth like 10x what we were. Yes. Yeah, on the Ramsey side, you guys are in amazing shape, and there's no problem with getting this $90,000 car. But this is not really a financial question.

This is more of a relational question. How do I get my wife on the same page so that I can get the car? Yeah, I'm not even necessarily trying to, you know, it's just, you know, we didn't grow up with this kind of money. So, you know, on one hand, the intellectual side of it's pretty straightforward because I can do ratios and whatnot. Well, you've listened to Dave a long time. George, you can refresh him. Let's just play out the percentages. Yeah, you've got multi-million dollar net worth and you're saying, hey, can I spend a tiny, tiny fraction of that on a car that we're paying cash for and is well under half of our

income. In that scenario, it's hard to look at the math and go, wow, this is an outrageous expense. But I get that your wife, she remembers the old days and she's going, man, that's way too much to be spending on a car. But you guys have worked, you've sacrificed, you've lived like no one else. And now is the part where you get to live like no one else how old are you scott um about 50 just turned 50 i'm sorry to say out loud i know i could tell you were like about 50 uh that's like when we're all it's all when we're nine we're like i'm nine and a half thank you very much just rounding yeah you know what if you said your wife's fine and it's not a getting her on board issue it's just you wanted to double check your percentages well you got your answer i'd buy the car all right well uh what does she get out of the deal well i'm trying to get her a nicer car i'd like to get her a land rover or

something but uh hers is not as many miles on it as mine she she drives the kids around so i don't mind what i drive but i figure if we're going to get something new, we should get something good. Well, let her dream a little bit. You guys have done so well. Does she like buying stuff, or is she still very diligent and frugal and says, ah, that's a waste? Yeah, I mean, really the only thing we splurge on is trips. We like to get the kids out and travel, but we just don't spend a lot.

Well, take her on a nice trip. Yeah. I mean, have you driven this Alfa Romeo? Have you taken it out for a spin? Well, I will. I haven't yet. I'm very weary of car fever. I'm inoculated against car fever.

I get it, and I think you've been very disciplined. I'm actually going to recommend that. Why don't you go out and drive a $60,000 car? I understand the $90,000 Alfa Romeo and the percentages, and you're there, but just try several things. But you don't have anything to be afraid of. Make the kind of money you're making, and you're debt-free, and the percentages here say it's good.

But go drive the thing. They'll let you do it. You've got the cash. You can show them. It's right there in the bank. Drive a few. Drive a few other amazing things. Get it out of your system a little bit and then decide

what you want to do. You've done the right things and now at almost 50, or you are 50, I can't remember what he said, you've earned it and you two got to be on the same page, though. You know what I mean?

Yeah, agreed. And that's the key. I think as long as you do that, that's fantastic. Yeah, great question, Scott. Fantastic job. You guys have put yourself in a fantastic position. I was hoping he had a story for us, George. Well, he'll come back.

He'll call us back. You know, those cars, by the way, there's a reason they cost what they cost. What is that? High performance. Is that it? I always thought it was great branding and marketing. No. No.

For Father's Day about five years ago, Stacy and the kids surprised me, and I got to do seven laps on a road course in a Lamborghini. We're talking a racetrack here. Oh, yeah, a real racetrack. Lamborghini Diablo, okay? There's a difference. I was terrified, and the instructor's in the car with me so he's like look is one of those fakes he's like this is gonna feel like you're gonna flip the car but it will not flip you gotta trust me i'm like i don't trust you man i mean the speed and the power in these cars how fast did you take it uh honestly george

i was so focused on the road, I never looked. You never looked down. It's so exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. Was it 150? Oh, yeah. On the straightaways, I got it up to 200. Very impressive. Well, you guys like your cars. I'll give you that. But do it with cash, people.

Do it the right way. Do not go into debt and do it like Scott did. Completely debt-free. Way to go, Scott. And do it like Scott did. Completely debt-free. Way to go, Scott. With a multi-million dollar net worth. Half America's going, yawn, Scott, buy the car. Do it, man. This is The Ramsey Show. Hey, I'm Christi Wright.

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in your app store. it's free to download you are listening to the ramsey show i'm george camel joined today by ken coleman it's a free call 888-825-5225. If you're a parent, you probably know college has gotten crazy expensive. And if you've seen our documentary, Borrowed Future, you know student loans are not the answer. They're a trap, and they've buried millions of people under a mountain of debt. On the other hand, scholarships and financial aid can help pay for college. And if you've got a kid going to college, they need to go after that free money with all they've got. But because there's no way to know if those will come through for you, you need a bigger plan to pay for college. ESAs and 529s are where it is at. These are college savings accounts that you invest money in, and it grows tax-free for college

expenses. ESAs and 529s have different rules around age, income, and your investment options, so you'll want to talk to an expert to understand what's right for you. We recommend working with a SmartVestor Pro. They're investing professionals we trust in your area that have a heart of a teacher. That's what you need to look for. You can text the word COLLEGE to 33789, and we'll help you find a SmartVestor Pro in your area. That way, you can help your kids graduate debt-free and have a firm foundation for their future. Again, text COLLEGE to 33789. Let's go to the phone lines this hour. We are joined by Zach in Huntington, West Virginia.

Zach, welcome to The Ramsey Show. Hello. Hey, how can we help? Yeah, I was calling because I'm interested in going to college for some stuff. I've already got a bachelor's degree, but I have a scholarship for a master of arts in Christian studies. And afterwards, I was thinking about pursuing a doctorate in divinity, but I'm running into some issues. Me and my wife are okay. We're on the same page about the master's degree,

but my wife seems to think that getting a doctorate is kind of a waste of money because we want to pay for our kids to go to school too. So I was wanting to know, is that really something that someone should pursue? Should I pursue that if there's not really any financial gain? But I just kind of feel like I want to. What do you mean by want to here? Just like, is it a pride thing or just feel nice to say, hey, I've got a PhD, I've done something? I've always wanted to get a doctorate, yeah.

But it's not just financial gain, but professional gain, right? So what are you purposing to do in your career? I want to teach at a seminary and be a pastor. Alright, so

it comes down to the two questions I like to put to people. Is it the only way for you to do that? Is it the best way? What's the answer to both of those questions? To be a pastor? No, no, you know, I wouldn't need that. But really to teach in any seminary, I would probably need at least a doctorate of some kind. Of course. So hired on full time. Right. So you and your wife are going, okay, we've got our shared goals. And it sounds like to me, you just got to get to a point where you go, we've got some other goals for the kids. And we're on the same page there.

And so we got to take care of that. And then down the road, I can cash flow the PhD once we take care of some other priorities. Is that what I'm hearing? I think so, yeah. Well, it just comes down to priorities you saying not now doesn't mean no and it sounds like she's going i don't think it's the right move right now do you agree with her right now right yeah yeah right now i i was thinking you know maybe 10 years from now but it of, I wasn't, she seemed a bit firmer on it.

So I wasn't sure whether, you know. Well, I mean, it comes down to whether you agree with her or not. And I think you agree with her. Not now. Down the line, once we take care of other priorities, yes. Seems like she's probably on board with that as well, correct? Yes, I think so. Well, we need to know so.

I mean, this is a conversation to say, hey, and again, when cash is in a place where you can do it because you want to, great. But, you know, there's a difference between want to and, well, I do want to move from the pastorate and eventually teach on a seminary level. Well, then that's a have to. I've got to do that to get that seminary teaching position, but down the line. So I think it's you all sitting together and going, hey, what are our shared goals, the shared vision about our life, including kids, and then eventually financially, professionally, what are our goals? Let's look at all those buckets together, get on the same page, and then it's not really a no.

And I think when you're having the conversation with her right now, I think you feel like you're hearing no. And I think what you've got to do is change that to not now, not yet. Make sense? Okay. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I think you're right. Yeah, because here's the deal. No feels final, George.

Yeah. Think about it. I mean, in any area of our life, when we hear a no, it feels very final. That door's closed. And that's what he's feeling. But the doctorate is not, seminary is not, an MDiv is not a never. It's not right now. Big difference.

Good call there. Jared is in Phoenix, Arizona. Jared, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi, how are you guys doing today? Great. How can we help? Yes, my mother is gifting us $60,000. And I'm just curious on what your guys' opinion is to what I should or could do with this money. Wow, that's nice of her. Is there any reason behind it or she just has extra cash and wants to bless you with this? Grandma had passed away in March and left mom 1.3. Wow. Yeah. That's a blessing there. And she's given you a portion of this? Yes, sir. Out of a kindness of her heart? Yes. Okay. How old are you?

34. You're 34. Where are Okay, how old are you? 34. You're 34. Where are you at financially? Do you have any debt? No, I'm in babies at four, five, and six. Oh, about $200 on the house that we just purchased. Okay, that's great. And so you have a wife?

Yes, sir. Have you talked to her about this money? Yes, we have. What's her thoughts on it? No, about the same as mine. Not too sure because we're investing 15%. We're investing for the kids' college. The house mortgage is less than 25% of our income.

It's a $500,000 house. We only owe $200,000 on it. So it's kind of like, do we just dump it on the house? Do we invest it? Yeah. If you don't have any other short-term goals, if there's no other short-term goals, like, hey, we need to upgrade the car or we've got a home repair we've got to do, you're already doing all those baby steps. I would just let this speed up your baby step six and get this house paid off. Okay. Is that what you guys were thinking or do you have any other thoughts? Yeah, we were thinking that what you guys were thinking, or do you have any other thoughts?

Yeah, we were thinking that. We were also thinking about getting rid of our electric bill and going solar, but I don't know about the ROI on that and if it's a good investment or much about that. Yeah, it's going to take a while to ROI on that. So if I'm you, I'm not taking that one. I know you're in Phoenix area and solar is big there, but it's still very expensive and it will still take years to recoup that money. I'd rather see you have no mortgage and then maybe we can talk about solar. If you're going to stay in that house a while and that's something you guys want to just cash flow for fun.

But I want to see this mortgage gone. And I feel like with your intensity at 34, you guys are doing really well. If there's no other short-term goals, I'm going ahead and slapping down that mortgage and feeling that progress, Ken. Yeah, Jared, I love that you're trying to think about saving money and efficiency and all that, but it's not apples to apples. Paying off that house is going to yield so much more financial gain for you than turning your entire house into a solar panel. I mean, it's a good thing, but there's ways to save money. It's not even close, so don't get distracted. And again, nothing wrong with this, but that's a good thing, but there's ways to save money. It's not even close. So don't get distracted. And again, nothing wrong with this, but that's a distraction.

Yeah. You know, like, well, what if I did this and I did this whole thing? No. Knock the house out. Way, way better play. Yeah, that's incredible, Jared. Well, we're rooting for you. Call us back when that house is paid off.

You guys are crushing it, man. Yeah, that's awesome. All right. Thank you. Will do. I love it. That's what I love to see, Ken, because I'm on that journey. I'm a little younger than Jared, but we have a big goal to pay off this house.

And the way that it's going to set up Jared and his family to be in his 30s with a paid-for house. It's crazy. No payments. They're going to be able to do whatever they want. Yeah. Yeah. It's really phenomenal. It's a game changer.

And you think about the amount of money that you're saving. There are other ways to like, you know, all right, let's get the house more efficient and all that kind of stuff. You know what I mean? Yeah. That's what I love about the baby steps. It clearly says, here's what to do next with my money. What is my next goal that makes sense for my long-term financial future? Yeah. When you can filter it through that framework, it just lets things be a lot more clear. And where there's clarity, there's freedom. Yes. I love it. We've got more of the show coming up.

Give us a call, 888-825-5225. I'm George Camel. He's Ken Coleman. This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you. I'm George Camel, host of the Fine Print and Entree Leadership Podcast, joined today by Ken Coleman, host of the aptly named Ken Coleman Show. Yeah, we spent hours and hours. The creative meetings must have been exhilarating. Lots of dollars to come up with that. I love it.

We're taking your calls. The number is 888-825-5225. And Elizabeth joins us in the Washington, D.C. area. Elizabeth, welcome to The Ramsey Show. Hi, how are you? We are doing fantastic. We're happy to talk to you. How can we help? Awesome.

Yeah, so my husband and I, we are currently finishing up baby, well, we're on baby steps four, five, and six, and we currently live in D.C. We're renting an apartment now. I think we lost you there. We have a 15-year mortgage on that. Sorry, repeat that. I heard up until you have an apartment in D.C. Yes, so we also have a home that we own in D.C. or in Atlanta with a 15 year mortgage. OK. And so we have we have tenants who have decided they don't want to renew moving forward. And so now we're debating on what our next step should be. So initially we're thinking our first option was to just search for another tenant, have them sign a 12-month lease, and then use that extra money to just go gazelle and tense and pay off the Atlanta home within three years.

And the second option is to sell the house that we have in Atlanta and purchase a home in D.C. with the money from the sale of the Atlanta house. Now, the caveat with that, though, is that we're not sure if we actually want to be in D.C. within three years. Once we start considering a family, we might want to move back to North Carolina. So that is where we're at. So you're not sure about planning roots in D.C. quite yet. It could be, you said, about three years? Yeah, in about three years. So, yeah, I mean, I'm 29.

My husband is 33. And we're thinking that when we start to, you know, talk about children and stuff like that, we'll want to be closer to our family. Which is in Atlanta. D.C. is just really expensive. No, in North Carolina. Oh, so you'd be moving completely to North Carolina if you made this move. Yeah. So either way, you will have no roots in Atlanta anymore. Exactly.

Tell me why you wouldn't sell the home in Atlanta. Let's come at it from that. Because you called us. You want to know our thoughts. But I want to know what you were thinking. And primarily, I want to know why you would not sell it right now in Atlanta. Yeah. So our thing is, it's still like a newer home. We purchased it in 2018. And so there's not really much that really goes wrong with the house at this point. So at this point, like, having tenants in and having them pay is, like, you know, it's just extra money.

And then we were thinking another alternative to that is even, like, possibly doing Airbnb and then just having a place to stay whenever we go visit. Okay, a couple things. A couple things. I'm going to jump in real quick, okay? How much is the house worth if you were to sell it? It would sell at $269 right now. What do you owe on it? $160.

Okay. And you said something at this point. I think you said at this point twice. Right now it's new, and at this point there's not a whole lot of upkeep. Well, before you know it, you're starting to have to deal with something, and you're a long way away. I know the Atlanta area pretty well. I just don't – you know, at this point, the market's as hot, hot, hot as it can be. If you were to sell this house right now, you pay it off, and then you have some money that you guys can then invest while you're trying to figure out what

the next three, four years is going to look like. You're not moving to Atlanta, doesn't sound like to me. It sounds like North Carolina is in the future. I just don't know why you wouldn't sell it. To me, you fast forward your financial goals so much by selling it and pocketing the profit on it as opposed to keeping it going and making a little bit per month. Right, that's true. Okay, that's exactly what I needed to hear.

That was just kind of a reassuring because we were at that, so I appreciate that. And then when it comes to purchasing a home in D.C., do you think we should just invest it up until we get to that point? How much would you be able to put down on a home in D.C. after we sell this place in Atlanta? Yeah, so we were thinking just like $80,000. The average house here is going around like $400,000 for a new build. So we would just put the $80,000 towards that. To me, I'd sit tight.

I feel like you guys, because it doesn't sound like to me, you're a firm on when we're going to North Carolina. You could change your mind six months from now, sounds like to me. Yeah. So I wouldn't buy a place in D.C. George, would you? Do you have a lease right now in D.C.? Yeah, we just renewed for another year here. Okay. What I would do is I'd sell that house. I'd park it in a high yield savings account for now to keep it liquid in case, like Ken said, you change your mind in six months or a year after this lease is over and you decide, hey, we need this money for a down payment for wherever we go. So I would keep it liquid. And then if you decide, hey, we're planting our roots in DC, you can take that money out and it will have grown

by a little bit. It sounds like you'd probably have close to six figures in savings sitting there, which is totally fine if that's for short-term goals. Okay. Got it. Yeah. Awesome. Well, thank you. Yeah, absolutely.

Great stuff there, Ken. A lot of nuances. Yeah. Well, but this is a young couple and I think this is the key. They're figuring out as we speak. They're literally going, well, we don't ever to stay in D.C. another two years, three years. Do we start the family? Then we move back to North Carolina.

And I've got to just tell you, I've been on that side. Just because we want to try to start to have a family doesn't mean we just wish it to happen. So I think as a young couple, staying as flexible as possible is what I would recommend. Flexibility is king for a young couple because they're still figuring it out, you know? And so I think, though, that there's this pressure to, oh, we've got to own a place or we're wasting our money. No, you aren't. And getting out from underneath that place in Atlanta and making a profit, I mean, they're

already sitting on just the $80,000 from the house. They're right at a 20% down payment on something in the $400s. Flexibility is the name of the game if you're a young couple with no kids. Good word. Let's go to Hunter in Hartford, Connecticut. Hunter, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hey, how's it going?

Great. How can Ken and I help? So I've been following the baby steps for quite a while. I was pretty dumb when I was young, and I ended up racking up about $90,000 in debt between credit card and a car. So for about nine months, I didn't go out, didn't do anything, saved as much as possible to pay it off. So paid off my credit card, paid off a lot of my car. And due to a kind of fluke

investment, I now have 17 grand and I owe about 24 on my car. So I'm trying to think if I should just, aside from the thousand dollar savings, put it towards my car. So three months from now, my car's paid off, but in six months I'm going to be moving. So I don't know if I should keep that money for eventually when I move. How much is this move going to cost you? I'm not sure. So I'm getting out of the military and moving. I'm not too sure where yet. And so that's where it's kind of, I don't know. Well, I don't think it's going to be a seventeen thousand dollar move so maybe you just set aside that thousand dollar um as a moving fund because you know that's coming up regardless and you slap 16 on this car leaving you with eight left yeah and then you're going to get

rid of that within a few months yeah because i have about right now I'm making about $6,000 a month, and my operating cost is just above $2,000, so I'm putting most of it into paying stuff off. Heck yeah. And Hunter, you've got plenty of time to save up for a move. Once you get an idea of where you're going, you get a quote, and let's say you have a three-month lead time, even in just your normal three months of operating expenses, you've got enough to be able to fund a move.

Yeah, I think you can pay this car off and then still save up for that move within six months. I absolutely think so. Is that possible, Hunter? Oh, it's 100% possible. Yeah, I negotiated for some cheap rent, sold my old car to get a cheaper one, but I had a bunch of rollover costs because I was a 21-year-old that didn't know anything about money. Well, you're a beast now, young man. By the way, thank you for your service to our country.

You're a great American. Thank you so much, sir. Thank you so much for the call, Hunter. That's awesome. You hear that, Ken? I was 21. I did some dumb stuff. You've been there.

I've been there. Yeah. But he decided at some point, he said, I'm not going to live like this anymore. There's a better way. $90,000 in the hole, and if I'm doing some quick math, which you know is dangerous, he's paid off about $68,000, $70,000 worth of debt in nine months, somewhere in that range. He's a rock star. While serving our country.

I'll take that. Wow. So much good stuff here, folks. Keep calling us, 888-825-5225 is the number. I'm George Campbell. That's Ken Coleman. This is The Ramsey Show. Our scripture of the day comes from Psalm 1611. You make known to me the path of life.

In your presence is the fullness of joy. At your right hand are pleasures forever. Colin Powell once said, There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure. Sad news of his passing this morning. Yeah, true great American hero. Pretty crazy.

You know, it's like you don't hear about public figures for a while, and I think I had forgotten or I never knew that he was suffering from cancer. And then you hear the news today, and it's like there's a – when you talk about somebody like him, you're talking about, you know, I was a high schooler, you know, Desert Storm. And then you go through the different administrations, the first African-American secretary of state. So certainly a historical figure in American history. And sad, sad, sad to see him pass.

It's hard to believe. Yeah. Crazy stuff. All right. Let's go to the phone lines. They're open right now. And we've got Kyle in Chicago, right. Let's go to the phone lines. They're open right now. And we've got Kyle in Chicago, Illinois. Kyle, welcome to the Ramsey Show. Thank you. Glad to be talking to you, gentlemen. You as well. So I would like to bless my wife

with a surprise vacation. All right. And we have really close friends who happen to be our neighbors. And the husband and I talked and we would like to send our wives together as a surprise. The question is a moral one, because from what he shared and from other conversations that we've had about finances, they're having a hard time, to put it mildly. And so what I'm concerned about is encouraging a poor financial decision in order to bless our wives together. And so what I want to do is negotiate those boundaries without being up in their business, but also not asking him to put themselves in a tougher spot, given that the holidays are coming up. They've mentioned that they may even need to purchase a vehicle here pretty soon.

But there's no cash in the bank, unfortunately, for them. So you're cash flowing this vacation for your wife, but you're saying, hey, if she goes with her friend, she's going to have to put that all on a credit card and come back home with a bunch of debt. Precisely. That's correct. Well, can I ask why this came up? Was this something that you guys are very, very close with them? And so you guys start talking about doing this for your wives. That's really cool.

You guys are standing around the trash can or something in the driveway, and then by the time you guys cook this idea up, then he tells you later that their financial situation is pretty bad. Is that what happened? Not exactly. My understanding of their financial situation had been somewhat progressive in nature, but it kind of became clear when he described how he would pay for it. Right. So why don't you just send your wife on the thing, or you're saying you wanted her to go with this girlfriend. That's the whole point of this?

Yeah, for the moms to get away from the kids. Our oldest son is seven, and he's one of four, and they have a lot of kids that are all little as well. So because they're basically best friends, we thought it would be nice for the both of them to do it together. How much more would it cost to pick up her portion? For both of them together, it would be $ so right about 1500 bucks can you do that or would that stretch you uh i believe we can it would be tight we would not need to dip into our emergency fund it would not compromise our savings for christmas either it would be tight but it can

be done we could cash flow it all right, I'm not telling you to do that. I'm just digging here, because at some point we've got to be grown-ups. And you've got to go, hey, man. And if this was your idea, and you said, hey, come along, come along, come along, and they go, okay, we can do it, but we'll have to put on a card,

I understand how that could feel. You're going to feel the weight. It's more about how you're going to feel than what position they're going to be in. And I think it's a cool idea to cash flow. If you guys are that close and you want to bless them with this gift, that's an awesome thing. But I also think you have an honest conversation with the buddy.

Yeah, I'm not suggesting, Kyle, that you make your personal budget tight to do this. It's just I was trying to show you you've got two options. I think you called us to basically say, what should I do, right? Yeah, exactly. Well, you either bless them and you make a bit of a sacrifice in order to bless them, or you sit down with them and go, hey, dude, listen, I am not trying to talk you into living the way we live. Happy to answer questions about the way we live, why we do this with our money, because I think it can help you. And I really would like to help you, but I don't

want to cross the boundary. Our friendship to you guys matters. Don't want to infringe, you know, because then we keep it as healthy as possible there. But, hey, I don't think this is a good idea for you guys. And I kind of feel bad about it. Like, I just don't think this is a good idea. What are your thoughts? Like, you've got to have a grown-up conversation here. How do you think he would respond to that kind of conversation?

I think he would be kind and cordial on the front end, but I'm not convinced that there's humility there to get that close in terms of perhaps it being an opportunity to reconsider some things. I feel like you send her on the solo vacation and you get out of the moral dilemma here. I think so too. Yeah. Would she not have as much fun with that, just being on her own? She might. She definitely needs her alone time too. Yeah. Would she not have as much fun with that, just being on her own? She might. She definitely needs her alone time, too. That is definitely an option. Or you tweak the vacation to be a lot less expensive, and you go, okay, we can do a long weekend in a nearby city and do some fun things. That's a thought, too. Yeah. See, Kyle, here's the deal. Based on your response, which, by the way, if you ever decide to run for Congress, that was a thought too yeah see kyle here's the deal based on your response which by the way if you ever decide to run for congress that was a wonderful answer the way you kind of you kind of

moved around that direct question um i i this is not your problem i understand your heart for your neighbors and your close friends i understand that you had a wonderful you got a wonderful heart it's not your problem like all of a sudden this has turned into i want to bless my wife because she needs some time away to oh what do i do about my neighbors it's not that's the wrong question it's like what do you want to do for your wife do that for your wife it's not your responsibility and by the way if he if you were to say all the things that you said and i love the roundabout you're very nice man he was like well i don't know if he has even look he's gonna get offended so now you're in a sitch a situation where we've talked about this idea and there's not much you can do about it he's gonna do what he wants to do and uh

i there's just no easy fix here man this isn't your problem um there's got to be some hard conversations and hard decisions, but I don't like the idea of putting them in debt. Right, but I mean, you don't have a moral dilemma. You've done nothing wrong here. You came up with a nice idea to bless your wife and her girlfriend. Well, you didn't know what their financial situation was. So, I don't know.

I'd send my wife away. That's what I would do. Stacy Coleman deserves a vacation. Yeah, if mama needs some time away, and I got the cash, I want to take care of mama. I'd love for her to have a friend with her, but at the end of the day,

what matters most? And I love the idea of her going on the solo vacation. He goes, hey, well, you guys did that with cash? How'd you do that? Oh, we had margin in the budget because we follow this plan. And maybe he sees that and goes, hey, I'd like to learn a little more. And you do it on his terms and you're not shoving the plan down his throat. And next year, they're debt free and they go, hey, let's do a vacation together.

Cash. That'd feel a lot better to me. Yeah. And you get your buddy on the same page. All those conversations are well and good until somebody just has a stiff neck about it and goes, well, you're weird and all that kind of stuff. So now you're going, okay, what do I want the relationship to be like? How's this going to mean? This is something that you just got to be a big boy and kind of walk through this and not make your decisions based on what they're doing and how they're living. Yeah.

Maybe not the joint vacation idea after all. No. Well, Ken, as we wrap this hour, we've got a lot of questions around career and purpose around here, and I want to let people know that they can actually call into your show every single day. How do they do that? Where can they find the show?

844-747-2577, 844-747-2577, The Ken Coleman Show. If they can't remember that, kencoleman.com. The phone number's there. We're live from 12 to 2 Eastern Standard Time. Just steps away in Studio B. And you can come watch it live. You can come watch it live. We had a great crowd watching live today.

It's always fun. And if you just want a bigger shovel or you're trying to answer the question, what am I supposed to do with my life? Can I make income and an impact? The answer is yes. That's what we do, and that's why we do it. So we'd love to hear from you. I love it.

Well, hey, two shows in a row, Ken. That's a win in my book. It's been a blast hosting with you. I want to thank our producer, Ben Hill, our associate producer and phone screener, Kelly Daniel. I want to thank you, America, for listening in to some life-changing content here on The Ramsey Show. We'll be back with you before you know it. Until then, spend wisely, save intentionally, and give generously. This has been The Ramsey Show.

This is James Child, producer of The Ramsey Show. Did you know The Ramsey Show is one of the most popular podcasts in the world? Subscribe or follow today wherever you listen to podcasts.