The Ramsey Show - App - You Can’t Afford To Be Careless With Money
Episode Date: October 1, 2025🤔 Think you’re good with money? Take our Money in America quiz! Dave R...amsey and Dr. John Delony answer your questions and discuss: "Should I keep cash at my house?" "Should we live close to our parents for a low monthly rent or move further away?" "Should my partner take out a HELOC on our house to pay me his part of our down payment?" "Our insurance didn't pay us after a natural disaster destroyed our home. How do we start over?" Next Steps: ✔️ Help us make the show better. Please take this short survey. 📞 Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 weekdays from 2–5 p.m. ET or send us an email. 📱 Get episodes early in the free Ramsey Network app! 🤕 Get trusted insurance coverage that fits your budget. 💵 Start your free budget today. Download the EveryDollar app! ❓ Find out where you stand with your money and get a free plan. Connect With Our Sponsors: Stop paying more and start shopping smarter at ALDI. Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp. Go to Boost Mobile to switch today! Go to Casper Sleep and use promo code RAMSEY to learn more. Learn more about Christian Healthcare Ministries. Get started today with Churchill Mortgage. Get 20% off when you join DeleteMe. Go to FAIRWINDS Credit Union for an exclusive account bundle! Find top health insurance plans at Health Trust Financial. Use code RAMSEY to save 20% at Mama Bear Legal Forms. Visit NetSuite today to learn more. For more information, go to SimpliSafe. Use promo code RAMSEY for 18% off at The Nokbox. Get started with YRefy or call 844-2-RAMSEY. Visit Zander Insurance for your free instant quote today! Explore more from Ramsey Network: 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 🧠 The Dr. John Delony Show 🍸 Smart Money Happy Hour 💡 The Rachel Cruze Show 💰 George Kamel 🪑 Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman 📈 EntreLeadership Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy
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Normal is broke and common sense is weird, so we're here to help you transform your life.
From the Ramsey Network and the Fairwinds Credit Union Studios, this is the Ramsey show.
I'm Dave Ramsey, Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey personality, Ph.D.
Counseling, a host of the Dr. John Deloney Show, one of our most popular shows on the Ramsey Network,
is my co-host today. Open phones at AAA 825-5-225. Jay is in Massachusetts. Hi, Jay. How are you?
Good. Thank you. Thanks for taking my call today. Sure. What's up? Well, I'm wondering if I should
keep a certain amount of cash at my house. I had something that came up several months ago.
somebody asked me to transfer some money, I opened up my app, my Bank of America app, and everything
read zero, all my accounts. And I'm looking at it and I'm saying, well, maybe this is just, you know,
I can transfer it anyway and I tried and it says insufficient funds. And so I call them and I'm on hold
for 25 minutes and then it hangs up on me. I try calling back and it's busy like the rest
of the world is trying to call them at the same time. And finally after about 45 minutes, it reset
itself and I'm like I didn't have any money what if I really needed money and I
couldn't get access to that well the problem is not whether you have cash at home
the problem is you're dealing with the world's worst bank Bank of America
sucks as you have discovered my friend so yeah you need to get with a small-town
local bank or a good credit union like Fairwin's credit union and then somebody
will actually answer the freaking phone on the other end
But Bank of America is, they're robotic and ridiculous.
No, I wouldn't.
The best thing you can do is stay away from them, like way away.
Now, let's go back, though.
Can you keep, should you keep cash at home, you can't keep enough cash at home to sustain life if the entire banking system collapsed and you could never access your money again, right?
I mean, so there's not enough cash for that.
Besides that, cash probably won't work if that's happened because there's probably something else going on too.
you'll probably just need bullets and water and gasoline at that point but um you know so i mean
it's like survival stuff right prepping stuff that kind of thing so but do you want to keep some
cash at home just for access yeah i mean what's the biggest possible event that if you couldn't
if you had that happen again that you would want how much money would you want to lay your hands on
and can you do that safely in your neighborhood in a nice safe inside your home how much
I don't know, maybe $1,000 to $2,000.
Yeah, I mean, and so if somebody broke and stole that, it probably doesn't ruin your life.
Mm-hmm.
Right?
Correct.
Yeah.
And, you know, get you a little safe of some kind.
I've got a little safe.
I've got a little safe.
I've always got $1,000 in my pocket.
That's a redneck emergency fund, right?
Ten Uncle Ben's, right?
Just to say I can.
And so, you know, I need to replenish those after tips sometimes, and so I've got a little stack
and a little safe. Nothing, nothing dramatic, but it just keeps, makes it a little harder,
but if somebody stole all of it, it really wouldn't change my life and this wouldn't change
your life, would I tell you to keep, you know, half million dollars in home? No. No, I wouldn't
tell you to do that. John, do you have a half million in your safe? Half million nickels, maybe.
Nichols. Your grandpa left you. That's right, yeah. Now, Jay, I'm with you, man. I like, I like,
here's a thing most of the time it's an illusion and i've here's a better example i got a buddy who's
a world-renowned nutrition expert and i told him i was taking some supplement and that i suddenly
felt better he laughed and said well the science doesn't agree with you but here's what's more
important the placebo effect the fact that you took this and you feel better is actually a net benefit
so i'm going to tell you to keep doing it because there's no harm
to it. And so I know that having cash at my house honestly is not going to protect me from the
meteorite, but it's going to make me sleep a little bit better. And that is, in and of itself,
is worth having it around, right? And also, I like to get the random kid knocking on my door,
selling something. I like to blow their mind every once in a while. And so, yeah, it's fun to have
a little cash around. You can have a good time with that. Give them 10 or 12,000.
Not that much. Nichols, yeah. Here, kid, here's a thousand nickels, carry it. Right.
No, but I like having a little cash around, but, but I'm with you, Dave.
Like, you can't have, don't have half a million dollars.
And again, if you're, it, it depends on the neighborhood, depends on who's in and out of your house.
And I mean, if you got people coming in there that are helping you or something like that,
I don't want to create a temptation for someone of those kinds of things.
So, yeah, yeah, you know, I would keep.
It makes me feel better.
And, yeah, that's okay.
And that, but, but I, if you take it too far, then you are, it is an illusion.
Right.
That it's real, that it really is going to fix everything.
When I went to buy my third deep freezer, my wife's like, hey, you're, you're, you're
avoiding me out of control.
Yeah, right.
Your deer hunting and your prepping is both out of control.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's a good thing.
So, yeah, I would keep some around for that reason.
But the big thing this whole call points out is you need to change banks.
That's what the whole thing's about, really.
I mean, really, at the end of the day.
Because honestly, that's the kind of experience people have had with the Wells Fargo's
in the fifth thirds and the Bank of Americas and so forth.
They're just mammoth.
I mean, Wells Fargo had 200,000 employees commit fraud.
Employees.
I mean, to start with, you've got 200,000 employees, but you have 200,000 that, I mean,
that's cray-crank.
Just how to put your head around that.
And then you think they're going to notice you with your $8,000 in your checking account.
They don't care.
This suddenly went to zero, which is your whole.
world. Yeah, and it doesn't even show up on their seismograph, right? So, yeah, I, no, I want to deal with
enough of a click and mortar that I can get my hands around someone's throat. I mean, I get
somebody on the phone, but yeah, I want my money. I'm still old school, man. I still like to
drive down to the bank. Do you really? I do. And it drives my wife crazy, but I still like to go
and meet with somebody.
And those lobbies are getting smaller and smaller.
The number of the staff is getting smaller and smaller.
But I won't bank with somebody that I can't walk in and shake their hand.
Or that I don't have someone's cell number.
Like that's just a, that's just a, it's my money.
And for me, it's how I take care of my kids, man.
And I think we are sometimes pretty absent-minded about it.
Just throwing it up to whatever, whatever online bank has the biggest, you know, the best deal or whatever.
Yeah.
I don't know.
For me, it's a big deal, and I want to go shake somebody's hand.
Well, it is why that we have partnered up with,
and now have even expanded the partnership with Fairwinds Credit Union.
Yeah, dude.
That's why, because they're just so cool.
I mean, they've even done this thing out.
I just love this right here.
So they've got a new debit card out with the Ramsey bundle.
On the front of it, it says,
dead is normal, be weird.
Now, that's a piece of plastic that says,
dead is normal, be weird.
That's my favorite thing ever right there.
So, but I mean, that's that, they are not there to put.
everybody in debt, they're there to just take care of folks.
Take care of folks, yeah. And that means they're going to answer the phone, right?
And by and large credit unions are really a good place to do that.
And by and large, your small town, regional, local bank, that's a good thing to, that's a good
place to park your money and keep it, keep your hands on it.
But you need to be, like you said, thoughtful about that, not just, you don't have to be
paranoid or weird or conspiracy theory or anything like that.
But that's, and I'm a bit of a lot.
Like, I know I'm an old soul and I like to go shake someone's hand, and I know that
That's not a thing anymore.
But it is this idea.
Just be thoughtful about where you're putting it.
Yeah.
I always remember.
Yeah.
You're about to say something to get yourself in trouble?
Yeah.
Oh, I just didn't.
America, you just watched Dave Ramsey.
Edit.
Yeah.
No, that was just editing.
Self-editing.
It was good.
It was really good editing.
Tell me an old man can't learn.
That's awesome.
I just felt it.
I felt it.
I felt it.
It was awesome.
Everyone needs insurance, but we all kind of hate it, really.
You know, I mean, like we hate it sometimes because we don't understand it,
because we write a lot of checks, it doesn't seem like we get anything for it.
It's just a pain.
But you know you need a good defense, and you don't want to buy the wrong kinds of insurance.
So with a Ramsey trusted insurance pro, you'll never have to deal with a sleazy business
or slimy salespeople because they're all interviewed, vetted, and coached to make sure that
they're market experts by us who have your best interest at heart.
I want to find out who's in your area that'll help you with your insurance, yeah, and do the right thing and teach you in the process, all that stuff.
Go to Ramsey Solutions.com slash coverage and find the type of insurance you're looking for, and then connect with a Ramsey trusted agent.
You can click the link in the show notes, too, if you want Mason's in Huntsville, Alabama.
Hi, Mason, how are you?
Hey, Dave, how are you?
Better than I deserve.
What's up?
Hey, so my fiancee and I are getting married in a month, exactly.
Well, congratulations.
I just have a – thank you. Thank you. I appreciate it.
We're excited. I have a few questions regarding just making decisions for our future, making sure that, you know, once we get married, we believe in what you guys teach.
You know, we're a family unit. We want to make sure that us as husband and wife are good as a family before, you know, we're, you know, prioritizing our, you know, extended family at that point.
So my question would be – I have two-pronged question if we have time.
my first question would be my parents have a
basically a mother-in-law suite
it's a guest house on their property they live on five acres
we have the opportunity to live there
it's a one bedroom one bathroom house for $250 a month
for the foreseeable future really
so my first prong question would be
what's your opinion on that
I mean should we think about doing that
saving the money up front we have a
pretty good income for our
our age, we're, you know, both one year out of college, and we're 22 and 23, so that has, you know, nothing, you know, that would be a step up for us.
I think you dropped your phone or something.
So we don't want to sacrifice our marriage and live too close to my parents.
I can't, wait, the last part, I think you dropped your phone. What happened? Can you speak directly into it again?
Yes, sir. Oh, there we go.
Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Yeah.
Yeah. Can you, can you, yeah, stay with this? Ask that question again.
Ask the last part of your question. What did you say?
I just ask your opinion on us living that close to my parents for, you know, it is a, it is a small amount to pay, but we don't want to sacrifice, you know, living too close to my parents and possibly, you know, hindering our marriage because we're so close to them.
It depends on the question beneath the question. It's costing you $250, but what's the real cost?
if they're going to let you be married and not try to interfere with your life and your mom isn't going to try to add a daughter to the people she gets to boss around including you then no I would say go get your own place if they're going to rent you a place in the back of their five acres and let y'all have your marriage and not require you to come to family dinners every night and all that and they're cutting you a break to get you all launched out I can be a great idea right that would be more of the scenario that I think we would fall under
Of course you say that. It's your parents. What does she say? Yeah, what's wife say?
Right. She actually agrees. We both agree that we would much rather have our own place.
But my parents and, you know, Haley, my fiancé, she gets along with my parents and, I mean, they don't have any quarrels or any kind.
And, you know, we both agree, yeah.
I think it's really important that you and your fiancé sit down and say, okay, when we move in, we're only going to do one meal a week.
and we're only going to do it this six months we're only going to do this you all create some
boundaries and then be a be if you're going to be a grown man you're getting married you're getting
your own place sit down with your parents and say hey this is important to us that we establish this
this is this sound cool with y'all right it's the unmet expectations the unmet i thought
you were going to us well you guys aren't we're doing this for y'all and why aren't you doing this
for us that's what causes the problem right so so it's not the proximity it's not having
boundaries and the proximity could be no issue if we set those boundaries in our firm with
them um okay um yeah and you know the other thing is but if they become a problem just jet
yeah move right right um our other part with that would be um i do have a car payment that i am
you know heavily thinking about getting out of um i she has a small amount of student loans
and like i said we have a fairly good income for what is your all's income you mentioned that
wise um it's about 95 good good that'll be your combined income that would be our combined yes
sir and how old are you like 24 you said right 23 yeah no sir i'm i'm 22 okay cool good for y'all
well done i do owe 20 000 on my fuck it's worth about 24 um and it's about 400
a month uh but like i said you know i currently live with my parents and she's currently living in that
house because she works closer to the city that I live in, but we aren't living together.
But I am paying, I'm paying my dad, like I said, a very small amount, $250 a month,
and I can't afford the $400, but, I mean, I've listened to you since I was young,
and it was, it's just been something on my mind to kind of get that out of the way before I
get married and not have that payment.
Well, you're not going to make it by next week.
Do you say you're getting married next week?
Next month.
Yeah, I don't think you're going to pay off 20 grand by next month, are you?
I wouldn't, but it's a possibility of selling it and then getting a different vehicle.
Yeah, you could do that.
I mean, that's okay.
So if you've been listening a long time, you know our general math rule of thumb is don't own vehicles, things with motors and wheels that add up to more than half your annual income.
And so if her car is 25,000, then you're there.
And I don't think it is.
So, you know, the second thing is if you can't be debt-free, everything but the house within two years,
by keeping the car, then the car is too much.
And neither of those are true in this case.
You could be debt free in a year, easy,
and your truck is less than half your annual income.
But it wouldn't kill you to sell it and get a $4,000 truck that's paid for,
and you all start your life fresh and just start stacking cash, man.
Just start stacking cash and start talking about buying a house in a year and a half or two years
and see how big old pile of money you can make because you're driving a lesser truck.
that won't kill you.
Either one is okay.
Neither one is going to stunt your financial growth substantially.
But, you know, what would I do if I woke up in your shoes?
I'd probably sell a truck personally.
But it's not like you're in the stupid column if you don't.
I've done the exact thing when I was a few years into being married.
Sold the truck and had to take a check to the title company because I was underwater on it.
But I just wanted to be clear of it.
You know, what I would do is,
I would wait until you've been married three months and then make the decision.
It's a good call.
You don't need to make the decision right now with all this other stuff swimming around.
Let's just get married, get settled in, get in the rhythm of life, then go, yeah, truck's going.
Or no, I want to keep it and I'll knock it out.
Either one's fine with me.
And again, you need agreement from your spouse, not your parents on that.
So, yeah, the big issue on your first question, I agree with.
John, is just can we actually have and set up an independent household emotionally and
relationally with reasonable boundaries being in this apartment? Some people can.
Truth is, not many. Not many. What would you say? One in ten? I don't know. Two and two and ten,
maybe. Maybe. I mean, it depends on so many different factors. I think that this is one of those
things that rarely is this the solution to everything. Usually when people say, hey, I need
help working on my communication with my spouse usually that means I want them to do what I say
right in this case communication is actually the answer which is make sure you're communicating
with your parents make sure you're communicating with each other and you'll set up these regular
rhythms where you can look her in the eye and say are we still good we still good to be here
and she's like I got to go and you're like cool we're getting out of here because she's the
priority your new wife um not your mom yeah yeah and where are you in the birth order and you're the
first one to leave home, break your mother's heart and all that stuff. Yeah, all that stuff
drives up in it. But $250 rent, man. Pretty sweet. We can set you up for a totally different life
if you all can talk here with you. If you bank the difference. If you bank it, bank the difference.
Stack the cash, baby. Stack the cash. That's pretty sweet. Yeah, I'm just thinking our kids and the
eight grandkids are all within 25 minutes. And I don't just show up on their doorstep,
nor are you mandated to do any family gathering, unless you've,
committed to it if you say you're in you're in if you said you're in we expect you
we're ordering food yeah but don't just go I don't know I mean we're freaking cooking for
you it's not the Ray Romano's family right exactly no popping out here that's popping in
popping out stuff but other than that I mean it's yeah we have not had any major issues
with that knock on wood there you go
in Minnesota. Hi, Maddie. How are you? Hi, I'm good. I'm so happy to be here.
Honored to have you. How can we help? Okay, so quick baby step question. This is kind of
flipping the script for us. We just started binging the show and starting the baby steps.
I want to keep our somewhat new Toyota family minivan and snowball it, but my husband wants to sell
it to become debt-free. We both have ADHD and get really into things, but then fail at
continuing like new hobbies, for example. And I'm scared if we go for a quick,
and sell the minivan will be, oh, we're, we'll be like, oh, we're debt-free, we're good to go now,
whereas if we snowball this, we'll have motivation and experience living like nobody else,
plus still have a more long-term car.
Self-awareness is a pretty cool thing.
Way to go.
Thank you.
That's neat.
It's very observant because that's actually a true statement about all of us that if we get a
quick fix, it doesn't stick as often as if we have.
to gut it out right um right and so yeah that that's that's true of all of us uh so the van is has
how much owed on it 20 and how much debt do you guys have not counting your house um just
almost down to student loans 4,000 left of student loans so the van and one student loan
yep 24000 and you're debt free right not counting
So in theory, less than a year in theory, right.
And your household income is what?
160.
Do you hate the van?
No, we love the van.
You should not sell the van.
Yeah, keep the van.
Not because of your reasoning, but just the van is, it's not out of line in your situation.
It's just represents a quick fix, but not because it's a quick, not, I wouldn't tell you, I think your reasoning is sound, but I think you ought to just keep this van just because it's a good fix.
But I wouldn't tell you, I think your reasoning is sound, but I think you ought to just keep this van just because it's a good fix.
just because it's a good van and you can pay it off pretty quick and because you're going to
here's what's going to happen if you sell the van what are you going to be doing saving up money
buying on the van right exactly yeah you know so and you make 160 and you'll be able to do that
pretty quick and so you're selling the van why so I can buy another one in a year or in eight
months or something no that's that's a bad use of all your brain calories no I would just
right yeah no I just buckle down and pay it off and you will get the
benefit of the thing you brought up while you're doing that yeah yeah what do
y'all do for a living what's the 160 coming from it's a great income uh thank you it's
you'll be shocked by this my husband is a social worker and I'm an artist okay all right
yeah and so here's what's um back to your original point then that is super valid um
neither one of you are, by your careers anyway, are process people, okay?
You deal with a lot of subjective things, not objective things.
And in order to win at money, you have to develop some processes that you stick to,
and that was, in a sense, what you said at the opening of the call.
You said the exact same thing, with a lot of wisdom.
Yep.
Okay.
And so the, I'll give an example.
We live in Nashville, and so a lot of the country music people are my friends.
And there's two types of country music people, the ones that are pure artists.
And then there are those that are artists and actually have some business acumen.
The pure artists are the ones usually get taken to the cleaners by some crooked manager.
And the ones that have a little bit of business acumen become household names for decades.
Oh, thank you.
I guess artist turned business owner is my career.
Oh, okay.
Oh, you're running a business.
Yes, yeah.
Oh, okay.
Get a kick out of this.
Maybe we sell custom paint by number kits of people's pets.
So customers send us a phone.
Oh, I thought you were standing in front of an easel.
Paint by numbers is a process.
This is awesome.
Okay.
You're making my point for me.
Okay.
George Camel has 50 of your products for his little precious.
dogs. That's awesome. Good for you. Okay. Now, you're, okay, now I get it. Y'all need them. Have you all
ever done a thing longer than your marriage? Have you ever stuck to a workout program, a nutrition
program, anything like that longer than your marriage? For me being an artist slash business
owner, but that's basically it. Okay. So that's a good point. Y'all, I want y'all to practice
this like you're, like it's a new muscle.
okay because you're going to find your marriage is going to get better on the back end of y'all grinding this thing out together
yeah we're not talking seven years like most people like or multiple years like most people who call
y'all are talking like a few months you'll make a ton of money y'all can pay this off yeah so but i
want y'all to practice building this muscle so i i completely made the wrong assumption about you
obviously you are a system's in a process person and so um the very nature paint by number oh my gosh
But I mean, but also like I, I had that's going to, but that's going to blend itself to the wisdom of her question, the way she posed her question.
And so, yes, go keep the van and you guys let that be the first part of your muscle of you working together, working money as a system, as a process, build a, let us build that muscle like John's saying.
That's the answer.
Yeah.
It's a good.
It's a good.
It's a good.
It's a good.
I love it, Maddie.
I love it.
Software people.
It's one of my favorites.
Very well done.
Nicole is in Ohio.
Hi, Nicole.
How are you?
Hello, I'm good.
Thank you.
How are you?
Better than I deserve.
How can I help?
Well, I'm calling because my husband and I got married a year and a half ago.
It's both of our second marriage.
So I was married for 20-plus years sharing finances with my former spouse,
and he was single for 15 years or a divorce for 15 years when we met.
And so this month is our first month having our budget meeting, and we make, I wouldn't say,
significantly different amount, but enough for it to be a difference.
And so I just wanted to find out if I could get some suggestions on how to go about approaching
it so that we can start saving for our dreams and goals and things like that.
Good for you.
Good for you.
well the fact that you've been through one that failed and he's been single a long time with no boss in his life except the guy in his mirror makes it harder for the two of you to just go woohoo we're both going to throw in and go right if you were 22 and you didn't have any of these scars or any of these ruts where you were stuck in singleness for 15 years or anything like that you would just jump in and go woo let's go but you guys this is going to be hard for y'all teaching an old dog new tricks is tough right
Yes, yes
But it's going to be worth it
It's going to be worth it
Jesus said your treasures
Where your heart is
When you agree on your spending
You're agreeing on what you value
What you prioritize
You're agreeing on your fears
You're agreeing on your dreams
It's not the money that matters
It's that we're agreeing on where the money is going
And that that means we're agreeing on what's important
Okay
And that's a big thing
And that's going to be
There's going to be some polishing going on
There's going to be a couple of these rocks
are a little rough and they're not going to be smooth stones easy you're going to have to
hold your breath a couple times girl okay okay yeah because he is the type where he wants to
be no he's a manly man if that makes sense and so I don't want to be I don't know if we should
do like percentages or no no no you need to do dollars manly men work with their wives all the
time and manly men put their their childish egos aside for building something that's greater
than themselves which is one plus one equals one when you get married yes yes and you have to have
the courage when you're putting your money in the same checking account to say the words this
makes me very scared yeah the last bozo messed me up and you're not that bozo but i still have that
scar and a manly man wants his partner to feel safe okay
okay got it but there might what you're saying is there might be a hunting rifle in the budget somewhere
yes correct that's okay that can be there and there can be a nice pair of shoes in there for you too
i don't care i just want you to be in agreement on it and not come in and go look what i did honey
no no no no we're going to be an agreement we're going to decide in ahead of time what we're going to do
we're going to walk together um because as john said one plus one equals one actually it equals probably
about five, because you get the power of synergy, the marriage advantage, all the data calls it.
The Ramsey Show question of the day is brought to you by Y. Refai.
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Today's question comes from Mali in Minnesota.
Molly writes,
My partner and I bought a house together,
but I'm the one who made the down payment.
I can already tell you we've got a problem.
He shares the monthly payment expense,
but hasn't said anything about paying me back
for half the money I put down.
Okay.
Should I ask him to take a payment?
out a he'll just molly no y'all break up just break up and sell the house and move on should i ask
him to take out a he lock and pay it off to pay me back for his half of the down payment you know what's
interesting is this is the actual first time i've seen the proper use of the word partner oh like uh like
this is like a business partner yeah and he owes me money oh by the way i sleep with it on
the building i bought yeah yeah um no you're molly you've got
Number one, don't take off a helock.
You're like you're trying to punish him.
Don't do that.
Because y'all bought a house together.
And so you telling him to take out a helock that he has to pay back actually puts your house at risk.
Don't do that.
That's silly.
The bigger issue here is you all have some major fractures in your relationship.
And you'll need to address those on the front end.
You should have addressed them before you entered into a legal binding contract called
the purchase of a house together, but you all are already here.
yeah y'all got big issues i don't even know we're to start with this dave other than just to say
don't do that um can i pull the pen and throw the grenade yeah okay good here we go um
you have two choices to fix this molly get married by saturday
and stop this shacking up crap because you're doing things backwards or sell the house
those are the only two ways you will survive this.
Both ways you have a potential to survive it.
But you're not going to survive it the way you are.
It's not going to work.
Because you entered into a business arrangement with a person you're sleeping with
with absolutely no written partnership documents.
And this is going to go sideways and you have no out when it goes sideways.
he could just leave and you never see him again and you can't even find him to get the house sold
because you can't get him to sign the deed he could be in a car wreck that happened to one caller
and she called me up and said yeah now I own the house with his mom because by the way he
doesn't have a will either because you people aren't real good about doing paperwork on stuff
I can tell and so he didn't have a will so guess who his area is it's not
his girlfriend that he sleeps with. I can tell you that. That'd be his mom and dad. That'd be who
gets this stuff. If there's no will, the blood heirs. And so now you are partners in a house
with the mother of a guy who didn't repay your his portion of the down payment. Oh, this is not
going to go well, Molly. People never. Let me help you with this. The word was never. I didn't
have a caveat. There was no except. It's a complete never. Capital.
N-E-V-E-R, buy a house with someone you're not married to, under any circumstances, period.
Everything that can go wrong in this life will go wrong at some time or another,
and you are stuck in a house with that guy.
You find out he's doing cocaine.
You find out he's got a secretary that he's more in love with you.
you find out and you're just stuck stuck stuck stuck with no legal or business recourse to get your
little butt out of this mess and you're just beginning to discover how uncomfortable that is
when this one little tiny thing about the down payment didn't come up like you guys shouldn't
have talked about that on the front end i think they did and he's just not quote unquote paying her
back oh but what happens when he doesn't do what he says he's going to do then he oh
Then he needs to go take out of Helock.
Yeah.
And, yeah.
And put it just lean on my house.
It's just dumber and crud.
Yeah.
So I'm deadly serious.
There's only two ways to fix this.
I'm going to caveat.
I don't think they should get married.
I think there's too many issues here.
I know, but I'm just saying to protect her.
Oh, okay.
That's what you're saying.
You know, but now because so at least when there's a divorce.
Right.
She has a, there's a legal mechanism for getting rid of this stupid house.
But right now, there's no legal.
mechanism for getting rid of this stupid house except getting rid of this stupid house so and here's
another prediction she ain't going to do any of it no so we're just telling you all these stories
so that the rest of y'all don't do what molly did that's the only reason we brought it up because
molly ain't going to do anything except what molly wants i can tell oh i wonder can i ask you this
this is just fun i wonder if in the state of minnesota
i wonder if he would have um like eviction rights like if she went dumped him today and said
get out of this house who gets the house who gets the house who has to stay who has to who gets
to stay and then i got to give you 30 days eviction and then you got to get 30 days and it's going to go
to court i got squatters right like this could get really messy really quick like you know spray
spray can lines down the middle of the hallway this is my half this is your house my dishes that's my
half the sink no water on my side of the sink that's your tobasco yeah oh my god yeah this is so bad
y'all this is people acting like they're married when they're not married and the whole system
in the united states is not set up for you sorry darling the english law does not english law is what
were modeled after and it doesn't set up with the exception louisiana which is french law and it's
not set up for it either so just to help y'all that it's the way the stuff is laid out you're screwed
in these messes oh my gosh all right carmonds in colorado hi carman what's up hi how are you guys
better than we deserve
How can we help?
Hey, for answering my call.
I'm calling in today because my husband and I need your help on what to do
to get out of debt and start saving for a house.
My husband is 22 years old.
I'm 24, and we have a one-year-old son.
My husband is in his second year of electrician apprenticing through a union,
and I just went back to work in July as a dental assistant.
So my husband gets paid weekly.
his growth pay before taxes on the check is about 900 but after taxes is like 696 and then so for the whole month it's about 2,784
I get paid biweekly my pay for the month is about 15 to 1800 a month my husband pays all the bills which all together our bills are about 2,753 so with his check as you can tell we're left with maybe a few
dollars after his check after the bills but including inside the bills we have tithing which is
240s so every week we put in 60 dollars from his check to tithe um i pay my car payment and then
the groceries and gas that adds how much do you owe on your car hon so here's the stupid thing
that we just did um i had a 2021 jeep compass it was about 22 000 that i owed on it
and the car was getting too small.
We couldn't fit the baby's car fee in there.
How much do you owe in your car, honey?
44,000 now.
You have to sell your car.
That car is going to bankrupt you.
Okay.
That car is in the land of crazy.
If you look up crazy in the dictionary,
you're going to see a picture of this car.
Yeah, okay.
That's what me and my husband have been talking about, too,
about selling his truck on top of my car.
You need to get a $4,000 car.
you pay cash for okay so that's one thing too we only have a thousand in our emergency fund
good that's a good start and the two and you know your number you know your numbers so even
though he's been paying the bills sounds like y'all are working on this together that's really
good news you're doing a good job with that yeah but the car is like we over in crazy land
are you going to sell it or not yeah well you said to sell it i know i said to sell it i ask if you
were going to do it.
Yes.
Okay.
Good.
This weekend.
Yes.
This weekend.
Put a sales sign on it.
Let's go.
Okay.
The car owns y'all.
You don't own it.
Yes.
And then that's going to free up so much.
And then you guys keep doing your every dollar budget.
We're going to give you a free year for every dollar.
And it's going to give you a step by step thing of exactly what to do after you get out from
out of this car payment and how you can walk your way into some savings out of debt
and start talking about building the life.
Because right now, y'all don't make much money, but you're just getting started, and you'll get there, and he'll be making more money as he gets out of the apprenticeship.
Right now, he's starving to death, though.
Y'all will get there, but this car is way off the chain.
Welcome back to the Ramsey Show in the Fair Winds Credit Union Studios.
Dr. John Deloney, Ph.D. in Counseling, Ramsey Personality, number one bestselling author, is my co-host.
I'm Dave Ramsey.
Brittany is in Indiana. Hi, Brittany. How are you?
Hi, great. Thanks for taking my call.
Sure. How can we help?
I am calling. We paid off our house in 2023.
Awesome.
And we, yeah, we have no debt. We are following your baby steps and your advice as much as we can.
The reason I'm calling is we don't feel the sense of freedom, I guess, that we kind of expected or wanted,
It's because we're currently saving for a big home renovation.
Our house was built in the 70s and has a lot of the original exterior components,
and a lot of them are in need of being replaced.
They're quickly going from a cosmetic need to those windows need replaced type thing.
And we're still trying to balance the enjoying freedom with our house paid off
with staying intense so that we can get that reno done and then really feel free.
and I guess we were just, I was just looking for some words of wisdom or perspective on how to stay patient
while you're saving for a big project like that.
Well, it is devastating that no matter what stage of money you get at, you'll find out it's finite.
Right.
It's just a pain in the butt.
It doesn't matter what you're driving, that there's always another one to drive.
It doesn't matter where you live, there's always another one to live.
and you never really arrive at that.
Contentment is kind of a bully in the school yard.
It says step across this line and I'll punch you.
You step across the line, it backs up and draws another line.
You know, it's a moving target, this contentment thing.
And that's, you know, I've run into it too.
I completely relate to the feeling that you have.
It's like you kind of thought when you got here it was going to be easy.
You wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.
We could just do whatever you want, right?
Yeah.
Well.
It's not, you intellectually didn't think it was going to be unlimited,
but emotionally you felt like you were going to feel like you were unlimited.
Like I'm a millionaire.
I don't have to budget anymore.
What was that?
It's like I'm a millionaire.
I shouldn't have to budget anymore, right?
Well, we do still budget.
I mean, and I know you do.
I'm just talking about the feeling, the feeling, the emotion.
It's annoying.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It is annoying.
And it's also, um, it's hard because.
we thought, well, we would be able to use more of our so-called extra money for things like
bigger, nicer vacations with the kids and things like that.
But I feel like...
Well, you could if you move.
Yeah.
And hey, I want to call that what Dave just said.
Here's my promise to you the day these renovations are over.
If you and your husband don't get together ASAP and change how you experience the world,
you're going to find yourself in yet another self-created prison.
because y'all haven't made the switch to we are choosing to live in an old house which means we are choosing to update this stuff some stuff has to be done some stuff doesn't but we're going to these are all choices you're not owned by it right yeah there's two ways to fix an old house fix it or move right if we were to move i even i have considered that thought maybe we're maybe we would be better off moving but we there's repairs that would have to be made regardless of
so it's we're kind of yeah but the point is you're choosing the point is you're choosing it
you're free choosing you're doing what you want next thank god you don't have this window project
and a house payment yeah you know and two car payments and student loans yeah you'd be what's known
as up a creek right no paddle yeah all that right it's the whole thing i mean so you're you're you really
are you know you kind of got to look back in your mirror and go thank god you know i had a heat and air
system go out on one of our properties the other day, and it was like $10,000 or something
we had to spend, and I went, thank God, that's an inconvenience. Yeah, it's annoying. It's
annoying versus a freaking catastrophe, you know, which is what it used to be. Everything was a
catastrophe. When you're broke, your life looks like a country song, you know, keep the dog
out of the street, it'll get hit. I mean, come on. Everything that'll go on can go wrong. And so,
yeah, the difference is something's annoying and has a, I kind of feel cheated versus a dad-gum
drama. It's an emergency. It's that old
CS Lewis quote that hell is
locked on the inside.
Like, y'all have created yet another
prison and then yet another prison and yet
it's just going to be a pattern until you all decide
to exhale and say, we are free.
We're choosing to live in this house.
We're choosing to go through these renovations. And this is going to be
a pain in the butt and we've done it before we can do it again.
And you laugh and you kind of get
that snarl and then you go get it
versus this is happening
to us. We are stuck
here. It's a victim
mindset. It's a scarcity mindset versus a, no, we can do whatever we want, and we're making
this choice right here. It's just a totally different reframe. You're in control. You're making a
choice. You chose to do the windows and delay the travel. And that's not a bad choice. No, it's a great
choice. It's a great choice. It's a great choice. It's probably the right choice, even if you turn
and sell the house. Like you said, we've got to fix it up to sell it, even if we're going to do that.
That's okay, dude. That's all a good choice. The great news is you have choices.
Yeah, that's it. For two reasons. You've got choices. Two reasons. One is you put your and yourself
in this position, and two is, God chose for you to be born in America, where you still
have choices, as opposed to someone just dictating to you what you're going to do.
So, yeah, that's the cool thing.
And I got to tell you all, one of the things that I distinctly remember this, it's a dumb
metaphor, but it actually happened, because I'm the spender, okay, in my house, Sharon's the
natural saver, I'm the natural spender.
And so I'm reading these scriptures and it says, godliness with contentment,
is a great game.
And so I go down the rabbit hall,
I'll start studying contentment because I'm like,
where do you find this?
I want to buy a box of it.
You know,
I need some of this because I've been go get it,
go get it,
acquisition, acquisition, acquisition,
acquisition,
my whole young life in particular in my 20s, right?
So it's Jaguars and Rolexes and I'm going to,
I'm going to acquire,
I'm going to,
I'll be happy when,
I'll be happy when,
I'll be happy when, I'll be happy when.
And, you know,
the bully in the schoolyard backs up,
draws a new line, says, come on.
And you come on, he said, do it again, do it.
You never really get to hit him in the nose.
You never do it.
And so, I, but after we went broke, I went to Costco where you can buy 25 pounds of peanut butter.
And you can buy 73 of anything you need one of.
And they check your little receipt when you're going out because it's federal law.
You have to spend $200 in there.
If you don't spend it, they make you go back and finish, right?
And so that's why they checked the receipt.
And I distinctly remember, I can take you to the Costco.
I had a spiritual experience.
I walked out of Costco buying nothing.
It was like a breakthrough.
I think there's a statue of you in a Costco somewhere.
You know, it was like, oh!
You know, I was like, I don't have to have any of this today.
And it was like something snapped.
It was real.
Yeah.
It was real.
And godliness with contentment is a great gain.
And I became convinced that contentment might be the most powerful financial principle.
If you don't have contentment, you get into debt.
If you do have contentment, you can save.
If you don't have contentment, you're always at odds with your spouse about money.
If you do have contentment, the two of you are just trying to figure out how much you can give away.
It's a breakthrough.
It's a financial breakthrough.
That's true for you.
Like none of the other financial principles we teach.
It's true freedom, yeah.
It's very powerful.
It's a great call.
I appreciate you calling so much.
I completely relate to you, Brittany.
I understand your feeling.
It's a very human feeling.
It's just, it's a journey you're on, and you'll get there.
So many years ago, we came up with this great idea.
There were these new things on your phones called an app.
an application.
So we decided that Ramsey should have an app that would do your budget.
And we worked and we worked and we worked and we worked on it.
And we developed really over the last decade or so the world's best budgeting app without a doubt.
It's called every dollar because every dollar has an assignment by you.
You assign every one of your dollars a place to go, give it a name.
Well, what has ended up happening then is that over the last three or four years,
We've invested a bazillion dollars in programming and in brilliant digital minds inside this building that do things I can't even spell and have managed to integrate into it the whole Ramsey plan, the Ramsey way.
So like you guys call in and ask us detailed, nuanced questions about what you do at this baby step or what do I do there, what do I do there?
And we've actually got almost all of that now answered inside of every dollar.
the all new every dollar, we just relaunched it the other day.
And it's a complete game changer.
You can watch the premiere on our YouTube channel and see it how it works in action.
What happens is when you go in, if you've been there before, do it again.
If you've never been, go now and get into the every dollar app because what happens in just the first 15 minutes or so, you're going to find thousands of dollars of margin.
and then we're going to start showing you how to apply it using the Baby Steps Framework and the Ramsey Way, so to speak.
And the Ramsey Way basically is we're going to take you from debt into wealth and generosity.
Change your whole family tree.
We want you to get there.
And so imagine how much you could find to put towards your money goals.
The all-new every dollar.
It's here.
Check it out.
Jake is with us in Cleveland, Ohio.
Hi, Jake.
How are you?
good guys how are you doing better than i deserve how can i help so me and my wife were 24 um fresh out of
college a few years ago uh so we decided to uh build a home our forever home um and the cost kind of
got out of control our parents stepped in my parents stepped in me and my wife been blessed to have
our parents by her side um they actually followed your financial piece back in 2000
there's a different story behind that but they're very uh they've accumulated some vault over the years um
They've handed us over a lump sum of money to help us build this house.
And whatever is left over, we will pay back in a mortgage payment to them.
Me and my wife make about $130,000 a year before taxes with a commission bonus for myself at the end of the year.
So my question is, and we do have a good amount of savings from the past years of working, about $120,000 in savings.
Okay, I'm sorry, if you have $120,000 in savings,
Why the flip did your parents have to give you money?
They have been working so hard their whole life to set their kids up,
and so they want to help every single one of their kids out.
I'm one of three brothers.
Yeah, but you may sound like you got in trouble, and they bailed you out.
Oh, no, no, no, sir, no, no, no.
So what happened with the house?
You bought too much house?
What's the deal with the house?
Yeah, so we're building.
Oh, you're still building?
Yeah, we're still building.
We're in the foundation phase right now.
Oh, you just started building.
Yes. So the deal was with them was we can collaborate with them. They can help out. I mean, we have a really good relationship with our parents. I work for them actually. And they wanted to, this is what they wanted to do for us. And so we kindly accepted it. And any cost after their initial lump sum that they handed over, we would pay back to them in a mortgage. And so I guess my question is, is me and my wife are still young. We're 24. We're not thinking my kids right now. Do we give,
up a lot of that savings that we have straight back to them at the beginning or do we have
some of that keep most of it and travel and have fun in early 20s so do i borrow money from my
parents when i'm newly married to travel that's in essence what this where this lands when i say it
that way does it sound as crazy to you as it does to me yeah a little bit okay yeah no you you're like
did grown-up stuff and went and bought a house at 24 years old, pay for your stinking
house, and then start talking about traveling.
Do you have a good relationship with your parents?
Very good.
The surest way to blow it up is to have money in between you.
Okay.
And I know that's a weird, hard thing to say at 24, especially when you got two people who are
like, no, it's no big deal, it's no big deal.
Just take it from two older guys.
Clear the money between your relationship so that it can stay as good as it is right now.
I think I heard a two-stage deal here.
like they gave you a gift of a certain amount and that even wasn't enough and so then they loaned you more is that right yes they loaned us the full amount of whatever cost for the house we're paying for in cash um to build so they're not taking loan out from any they've been completely debt free since 2008 I know but you now owe them yeah a mortgage payment okay so that part where they went through financial peace university they flunk the class because we tell you not to do that ever
don't ever loan your children money oh my god because it puts a wedge between the relationship
yeah the borrower is slave to the lender now you have to eat dinner hey eat Thanksgiving dinner
with your master yeah that's going to be painful for your wife not going to bother you much
because it's your parents but it's going to be painful for your wife understood so how much money
do you owe your parents that you have to pay the mortgage on um probably going to be around
200 to 250,000
Okay, and how much of a gift did they give you?
About 50% of the total cost to build, so about 200 to 250,000.
So you're 24 years old, you make 130 and you've got a $450,000 house?
Yes.
Dang, Gina.
Okay.
It's a lot of house, dude.
That's a lot of house.
All right.
Well, for sure, the answer to your question is no, you don't need to go on
vacation. Yes, you need to take the $130,000, but I'm even going to go a step further. I'm
going to put the $130,000 with your mom and dad to limit the size of the mortgage, and then I'm
going to go get a commercial mortgage, not from your parents. Okay. Because I don't want this
mortgage. I don't want you paying payments to your parents for any amount of money, for any amount
of interest. I don't think you're going to do that because I think you guys have worked out this
detailed thing in all of your heads that this all works out to the point that you're ready
to go to Europe instead of paid by them back.
Here's what I would see.
I can see myself working really hard so that I can bulldoze a path for my son and his new
wife.
I get that.
But if my son was to hand me a check for $130,000 and say, Dad, I've got this money
saved up.
This is the part of the mortgage.
And then I want you to see here, I'm giving you the rest of it.
I took out a commercial loan because I want to just stay your son.
I don't want to stay one of your, like, I don't want you to be my banker.
I would be so proud.
And in a way, you're kind of not showing him up, but you're kind of saying, I'm taking the reins here.
It would show a level of wisdom and maturity.
I'm trying to give him as much grace as I can't dad because the arrangement he's put you in is madness.
It just ends in somebody wanting you to do something for Christmas and your wife doesn't want to.
And it's like, well, after all, it's just a recipe for disaster.
But man, if you went and did what Dave just said, go get a commercial loan for the rest of it.
And by the way, that's a tiny mortgage.
It's a $120,000 mortgage.
It's a tiny, tiny, tiny mortgage.
Just go do that, man.
You'll have that paid off in no time with as much money as y'all make.
If you don't go on trips.
Yeah, if you don't go to Europe.
And by the way, you're, I don't know.
Dave, trips are more fun when I'm older now.
I don't know why.
They just are.
Well, they're more fun because they don't follow you home.
but in essence that's what this ends up being
I don't have I don't have to increase the amount we borrow from mom and dad
by the amount that we spend on the trips
and so it's black borrowing on the trip
borrowing from mom and dad to go on a trip and obviously that would be
ludicrous so moms and dads those of you that graduated from
financial peace university with a better grade than that mom and dad got
which was an F
here's the rule okay if you want to give your children
some money and they pay cash for a house and part of the bargain is they never borrow money
again because you want your family tree to be completely changed great never make your child
your grown child your slave you change your relationship with your daughter-in-law your son-in-law
you change the relationship in how you interact with each other it's just you're adding layers
to it that you're unintended but they're very real and no one is the excessive
even a nice master is a master
Tim is a master
Tim is in Ohio
It's Ken
Oh sorry
Hey Kelly
It's Ken okay
I was just reading my screen
Pardon me how can I help
That's no problem
Yes Dave
Um, so I, uh, year and a half ago I got into your program and stuff and let me thank you from the bottom of my heart because that completely changed everything for me. Um, and with, I'm married now and my wife is 62. I am 55. And, um, I work for the state and I have opers and we have to, we don't have a choice. We have to put in 10%.
of our gross income into that, and then the state also matches that 10% and adds 4%.
My wife's 401K, they do not have any company match.
Her late husband only would allow her 5% to 6% and not aggressive at all.
So there's not much in there, but we currently have 27,500 in debt.
there's 44,000 in that account and then we have our house and crunching the numbers and looking at
things if we take the 27,500 out of there and just wipe out that debt, that allows us to pay the
house off in under five years and 18 months more of investing at $3,000 a month.
Does that make sense to you?
she's 62 62
how old is she
she's 62 so
yes we understand we'll be on the hook
for taxes but we are
yeah the 44 it's going to take the whole 44,000
to clear 27
okay
so or close
I mean
give or take a thousand bucks or two
but it's not I mean you're going to pay taxes
on 44,000 dollars going to be at least
10 grand, right?
Hello?
We would be in the 12% tax bracket.
Why?
Y'all don't work?
Yes, we work.
How are you in a 12% tax bracket?
Because of filing jointly and you take the first 10% off of that and then we go into the
rest of it goes into the 12% then.
What's your household income?
about $75,000 a year.
I don't think you're doing that right, but I'm not a tax pro, and I can't do it in front of it.
I can't do it off the top of my head.
Anyway, you're going to have taxes.
It's going to eat up a lot of the $40,000, and so you're basically going to cash out her retirement at 62 years old, pay the taxes, no penalties, and pay off her debt.
Yes, I would do that, but make sure you set this money aside for tax.
Okay.
And have somebody else calculated other than you and me.
me because neither one of us were very good at it. I don't think. Yeah, I don't think you're calculating
that right. But anyway, yeah, but I think either way, you're going to use up most of it either way.
So tell me the math behind that, Dave. Like somebody, 62, you're going to go ahead and pull it.
Well, I mean, if you've got retirement and he's got a bunch and they're going to, you know,
we don't tell people to cash out their retirement and pay before they're retired. But at 62,
your retirement age. And so you can pull it without any penalties. And I don't want to pay that 10%
penalty, but you're going to pay your taxes on it. But, you know, like if we have somebody
called in, they owe $300,000 on their house and they've got $900,000 in their 401k, I'll pay
off the house out of that. If they're 62 or older. Yeah, yeah, because no penalty on it,
pay off their house. It's what you, it's what you saved it up for. And in this case, it's just
a blended family, a second marriage thing, and it's just a weird little account. Yeah.
It's not a big account. But, um, but it doesn't, it doesn't really change them.
The principle is, yes, if you have enough in retirement and you can clear all your debts,
and pay your taxes that you create by doing that, I would do that as long as you've got
some left over, and of course they've got all of his, and they're both continuing to work
and are going to put $3,000 a month back into the program.
So that's where we're going.
Yeah, that's no different than, yeah, very, very good.
Christine's in Virginia.
Hi, Christine.
How are you?
Hey, I'm doing well, Dave.
Thank you so much for taking my call.
Sure.
How can we help?
I recently discovered you about a month ago, and I'm hooked now on your little cult,
which I'm happy to be.
Yes, we're going to send you some, we're going to send you some Kool-Aid here in the mail.
Awesome.
My question is, my husband and I are in about $87,000 of debt.
I'm 60, he's 62.
I want to start your program desperately.
We both do.
But my concern is that of that debt, $68,000 is in a debt.
settlement program.
Doesn't mean you can't pay it off.
Really?
Yeah.
I thought, well, aren't I obligated to them for the 55 months I signed up for?
Nope.
You've already paid them.
They got all their money up front.
The first handful of payments you paid them paid them, paid them.
None of your payments, the first handful, went to the debt.
It went to them.
And then what they've done is destroyed your credit and have,
put you in default on everything and then set up payment plans with everybody.
But, I mean, I would do it as a lump sum.
I probably do it as a lump sum.
What kind of debt, how much of the 87 is in that?
68.
Oh, yeah, you said, okay, all right.
And what's your household income?
We make about $100,000 together.
Okay.
Well, you may find that it's easier to just lump sum it and call them up and go,
Okay, help me settle lump sums on this rather than payments.
Ask the debt settlement company to do that.
How many different debts are in the 68?
Let's see.
I was just looking at it.
My problem with them is that they're not doing very well.
No, no way.
You're kidding.
I'm sure.
I was hooked.
I was hooked, blind and sinker.
I will not lie.
It's been since January.
How many debts?
And they've only settled two accounts, probably 10.
Okay.
And they've settled two of them.
Okay.
What I would do is call them up and say, hey, I'm going to start advancing some cash towards
this and you're going to get more aggressive because you're going to feel my foot on your butt.
I don't have any extra cash to send them, though.
No, you do if you're going to get out of debt.
You make $100,000.
Something's going to change.
you're going to get on beans and rice rice and beans we're not going out to eat we're not going to see
the inside of a restaurant unless we're working there we're not going on vacation we're not
spending any money on anything because we're 60 years old and deeply in debt we got to get this crap
cleaned up the Christmas presents yeah we're sending cards this year instead of presents for everybody
yeah everybody here we go the worm has turned times have changed it's about the change baby
I mean you got to get you got to get after it and because you don't you don't want to be 70
and be looking at the you know half this debt still laying there because you've been toying
around with it. So, but going clear the other portion first and then when you get to the
debt settlement 68, then start being on the phone with them going, okay, I need to settle one
more of these. Let's get some, let's get some aggression going here. And it doesn't take five years
then you can work through it in whatever period of time you work through 87 making 100, which
hopefully would be working extra selling stuff could be as early as two years, probably a little more
two years to get through that but you're going to have to be living on nothing nothing nothing
nothing honey blankets blankets sweaters in the house all of it that whole thing turn the third step
turn it's it's a mind shift yeah you got you got you got to go and here's the thing as as as
you know you don't have a lot of time to do this it's not like you got 40 years to figure this out
you got 40 months to figure this out so you need to get with it and um
You can do it.
You can absolutely do it.
But the debt settlement companies, boys and girls, the way they work is they collect payments from you for five years.
The first set of payments they collect from you, they put 100% of it in their pocket while letting all of your credit cards and other stuff go into default.
Then they go to the creditors and say, oh, these are in default.
What will you take as settlement?
And so even if you weren't in default, they put you there.
That's their process.
That's how they do it.
And that's why we tell you not to do that stuff.
If a washed up actor between a snuggy ad and a gold ad on cable TV is pitching you something financial, stay away from it.
Well, it happens occasionally.
We've got one of our friends stopped in here.
the one and only Tim Tebow.
Welcome, my friend.
Thank you, guys.
So good to see y'all.
Thanks for having me.
Good to see you again.
So we were just talking Papa stuff before you, as you walked in.
Got a new baby?
We do.
Almost three months old.
It's crazy.
Now I feel like I'm actually getting old.
A little gray in the beard there.
You got to be careful.
A little gray in the beard.
My wife calls it salt and pepper, though.
But it's good.
It has just been such a crazy blessing.
You know, a lot of people ask, like, you know,
being a dad, is it a different kind of love than you knew? And I thought a lot about it. And I don't
know because the moment Demi said she was pregnant, I think I already felt it. But I'll tell you what
hits you is the responsibility. Like when we get home, I was like, oh, we got to change this
cabinet. We got to change this countertop. She could get injured on. She could do this.
You're like, you're trying to think 10 steps ahead and five years ahead. And that level of
responsibility is surreal. I always like to tell somebody, it's like somebody just adds two more
plates on the squat rack, and just that, it sits under you, and you're like, oh, this guy
heavy, right?
It is.
So the Tim Tebow is a two-time national champion, Heisman trophy winner, first round NFL
draft pick, speaker, college football analyst, five times New York Times bestselling author.
I think you've been on here four of those times, if I remember.
So I'll take credit for a little of that.
He's the founder and the leader of the Tim Tebow Foundation.
He and I have done some wonderful ministry work together in and around the section.
trafficking world, preventing that, obviously. Anti. Anti. Yeah, I mean, we've done, we're both
share a love of several people that are in that, in that space, and your team is in that space
big time. And so we've had a lot of different things we've done together. New book out,
look again, recognize your worth, renew your hope, run with confidence. Now, I do know you well
enough to know the truth is, is that you don't just sit down and randomly go, oh, time to do
a book, that something had to be burning and churning inside of you that you couldn't not say.
And so where does that come from on this one?
It was really inspired several years ago, and I felt like I could put it off longer than I was
called to. And it was really first inspired at a night to shine. It's our worldwide celebration
for individuals with special needs. And we were.
at one of the night to shines in Arizona and it was during COVID. And so they're driving through
the drive-thru and on the red carpet. And we're celebrating all of these cars that are coming through
and a lot of them are corvettes. And so all the kings and queens are in the back and cheering for
everyone as this massive crowd is cheering for everybody. And there's a young girl and a red corvette
as it drives around. And she is just beaming the joy in her life and in her heart.
and just oozing out of her is so contagious.
And as the Corvette pulls by, and I see the back of it,
and I didn't even know our teams and partnerships with the churches
were even making these bumper stickers,
but I saw the bumper sticker, and on the back, it said royalty on board.
And I just thought, man.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's somebody's daughter, right?
It is. It's royalty on board.
And so it really led us down this track of really studying,
what does it mean to be made in the image of God?
And so we talked to so many incredible scholars over the last few years and diving in.
A lot of people talk about the image of God is rational, relational, functional, right?
We're rational beings, so logic and thought and all of this that God's given us,
or relational meant for relationship with each other and for God are functional to rule and reign.
And I think all of those are part of it, but I think it's a step further and a step that's even more important.
and that's when you really look at the image of blank that was used over history, especially
in the ancient Near East, it was always the term used for kings or for monarchs.
So, Assyrian king was made in the image of Beller, an Egyptian king made in the image of Ra,
gods that they believed in.
And so when they would have heard that in the ancient Near East that we were made in God's
image, what it would have come across to them is that it's a royal worth statement.
And we have forgotten that in our society, that when we're made in the image of
God. It's not just what we do, but it's who we are. It's the worth statement that God has given us.
It's a royal worth statement that he loved us so much. He would create us in his image. And we have
just forgotten that. And if you look at what's happening in our societies and around the world,
if you look at the boys and girls that are being exploited or trafficked or the loneliness or the
suicides or all of this, it is, it's a royal worth statement. We've forgotten the worth of humanity.
We've forgotten the value of every single life.
And I really, my heart and prayer for this book
is that part of it would be one of the most encouraging things
that someone would ever read.
But the second part will also be one of the most challenging things
that hopefully, prayerfully, someone will ever read.
Yeah, so as you're talking, I'm thinking, A, the importance of hearing this,
but that also means I've got a responsibility to every single person in my neighborhood.
Everyone you ever meet is made in God's image.
and the encouraging part is we share so much biblical truth
that should be encouraging to people.
Man, I'm made in God's image.
It's a value statement for me.
It's a love for me.
But it also is why we argued and challenged
and thought over and over about the title.
Why it's so important to look again
is to look again at who God made me to be,
but then it also applies to every single person that I see,
ever of all time.
Check that bumper sticker.
Your friends and your enemies.
Every one of them.
Royalty on board.
It's royalty on board.
Man.
That's a profound call for this moment.
I think that you just couldn't have written it or thought it for what's taking place in our society.
For the divisiveness, for the demeaning and the diminishing of people that we disagree with,
for the lack of value because an argument.
or because of disagreement or because of a political stance
or because of a background, and we diminish people.
And instead of having a disagreement but still valuing people,
you can do both.
And as a society, we have to do a better job of valuing who God made us to be,
but then also valuing everybody else.
Look again.
You'll see the bumper sticker if you look again.
Recognize your worth, renew your hope, run with confidence.
It's a brand new New York Times bestseller.
I'll go ahead and predict that.
from our friend Tim Tebow.
Man.
Dude, I'm convicted sitting here, man.
The thing keeps running through my head is I remember even teaching teens years ago,
you're a king's kid.
Yeah.
You're a king's kid.
You're a king's kid.
I remember a pastor teaching us one time.
He said, you know, in the Old Testament in Genesis, it says God created the
heaven's earth and the stars also.
That's the mention of the stars.
And then he spends 35 chapters on Joseph.
You know, I mean, it's like, what's more valuable to God?
That individual.
It's not even close.
You know, it's not even the individual and the stars also.
That's right.
There's almost an afterthought.
That's right.
There's only one thing that Jesus as the Son of God came to die for.
People.
And yet we put in place of people or above people, our cars or our watches,
or our praise, or promotion or recognition, all of these things.
And when you do that, what you are doing, what's implied is how diminished people are, right?
That they come after all of those things.
And this is a challenge that you are more important than all of those things, but so is every person you see.
And especially when you see people that are suffering.
And today, there are so many people that are suffering.
And how could we know the worth that God has put on humanity and not do something,
especially when we know they're suffering?
So bring it down for the person who,
is the truck driver or the single mom who's balancing two kids listening to the Ramsey show trying
to figure out a pair of debts off what is the thing they can do in their community well it's
like we can start foundations and big stuff but what's something that a person who is just grinding it
out right now in their neighborhood don't look past don't look away refuse to look away refuse to
look away um that person that you're when you're pushing your kids in their stroller and you want to
ignore them. Say hi. Value them. Value people. If you're the truck driver, what's taking place? Well,
how many kids are being exploited on that, right? Be aware of it. Talk to your teams. Talk to your
supervisors. Understand the problems that are taking place and act upon them. And people say,
well, what can I do in the macro? Sometimes it's hard to step into some of these fights because
they're big. They're very hard. They're very difficult, daunting and overwhelming. But all of us
see people almost on a daily basis. Value them. Love them. Show them. Show them.
a worth because how do we know their worth? Well, it starts in Genesis that they're made
of God's image, but then it's brought full circle when Jesus came and died on the cross
for them. And how do we know the value and worth of somebody by what someone is willing to
pay for him? And Jesus Christ, who has infinite value and worth, was willing to give his life
in exchange for you and me and every person we ever see. That's how we should see them. And right
now we see them through the faulty lenses. Look again with my friend Tim Tebow. Thanks for coming by,
my friend. Oh, it's my pleasure. So good to see you, brother. You too.
today. Welcome back to the Ramsey show in the Fair Winds Credit Union Studio.
Dr. John Deloney, Ramsey, Personality, Ph.D. and Counseling is my co-host today. Open phones at
AAA 825-5-225. Kim is in South Dakota. Hi, Kim. How are you?
I'm great. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up?
Okay. So we lived debt-free, had purchased to use cars.
We followed your program since we had our daughter 20-something years ago and have lived that way.
But ran into a little naggle when we were part of a natural disaster.
And we had purchased homeowners insurance with State Farm and had a really high deductible
because our opinion was we had enough money saved that if something happened,
we would pay for ourselves and not pay a huge premium.
So that's how we lived our lives.
We don't have a go on vacations.
We have one child who was in college and we were paying for that.
with cash. She's pre-med, so she has to go to school for that. And so that's kind of how
we lived our lives until the storm came. But the storm made our house unlivable, and so we
had to go into a hotel for two and a half years. And the insurance company did not pay us
like they said they would. And so we ran up thousands and thousands of credit card dollars and
debt to pay for food, housing, all of that stuff. And unfortunately, we tried to resolve this
with them and couldn't so we we have an attorney who's filing suit against them to try to get our
money back but in the meantime we're trying to dog paddle our way out of this and at the same exact
time our child had to have open heart surgery we had to take her to California to Stanford and we spend
a lot of time which I have no control over these bills at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester so I never
know how to budget because I've got hotel bills unexpected when they say you have to come to Mayo
and you have to pay for those things you're to pay for food when you're Mayo gas
And so it's very difficult to budget.
So I just wanted to know if there's something I'm missing, because sometimes you're too close to it to see it, what's the best way to manage this?
Because I don't feel like I have control like we used to have, and I just wanted some ideas.
Okay.
I'm missing, so for 20 years, you were completely debt-free, and you didn't have any money?
Well, we did have money, but we used a lot of that to do repair at front.
We became the Bank of State Farm.
Yeah, I know, but how much money did you have?
We had, I'm going to say, saved up and not used for college cash on him
because we just bought this house probably about $100,000 that we had saved up.
And so why did it take two and a half years, and why were you not buying your own food while working?
well we couldn't pay you in the hotel you can't you can buy food but you can't cook if there's no
well i mean if it's going to take two and a half years ago why don't you go rent something
we tried um there wasn't anything available that met the the physical needs that we had
we had moved our neighbor into our home who was 90 years old actually 95 for end-of-life care
and we couldn't have stairs and there were just requirements that we had that they could not
meat. So we ended up in a hotel and you had to pay for laundry. You had to pay for
meals in time today. I mean, State Farm screwed you, but so did those decisions.
Yeah. I mean, you, you, that, you, you, you, quadrupled or five extra cost, and it doesn't
take two and a half years to rebuild a house. Oh, it's not even done now. I mean, why?
Like, okay, so I built an entire house in, in 11 months. Why can you not build a house?
I've got family members that just lost their house in Texas,
and last night was their first night back.
But it's been, what, four months, five months?
Like, yeah, two and a half years.
Tell me about that.
Like, it seems like they could have knocked the whole house down.
One, it was a natural disaster,
so there were lots of building going on, projects going on.
So there weren't a lot of contractors available.
It was also during the time where you had high gas prices and stuff,
and contractors didn't want to come out to look at the house
It wasn't something that they wanted to do because there was so much work.
There was a lot of contributing factors.
Also, the fact that State Farm was not approving things.
You kept having to wait.
They would make us do another estimate and another estimate, another estimate.
But you stayed in the ditch rather than making a decision to do something completely different for two and a half years.
So that's what puts you here.
My goodness.
And now the health, your daughter that's studying to be a doctor has had open heart surgery?
Correct.
So she's not studying to be a doctor right now.
She's recovering, right?
No, there's schools letting her stay in school, and she's trying to do stuff, you know, online and submit things sometimes late.
Did she have health insurance?
She has our health insurance, my husband's health insurance.
And does it not cover the surgeries and the other stuff?
It covers surgeries, but it doesn't cover any of the other things associated with it,
like hotel bills and gas and see when we go to Mayo or when we had to go to Stanford.
We went Stanford for seven months.
Yeah.
So what is your household income?
188.
And you can't buy a hotel bill and go to Stanford if you make $188,000?
Well, again, I mean, we did and, you know, put things on credit cards.
Why? You make $188,000?
Because we had a mortgage payment and we had college tuition and we had other things that we were paying.
I mean, it wasn't, and we were paying, you know, for the house while we were in the hotel.
I mean, there was a lot of those, and I could sit here and go over a single bill and you go, oh, that makes sense.
But we're not extravagant.
I mean, we're not giving an idea like we've canceled our trash service and gather up our own trash and take the dump ourselves.
Yeah, but we can run sprinklers.
We're not trying to pick those apart
I think if I back all the way out of this thing
I think the part for every emotional health challenge
there is this distance from this scary terrifying line
called reality
and if you
on my show I say this probably three times an episode
which is the life you had is over
and you got a new one now
and what most people try to do
is keep parts or the whole of their old life going
while navigating this new reality.
And so, for instance, you were in a position
when you were debt-free and had $100,000 in the bank
and you all made $200,000 a year
to fully fund your kids' college.
That's a dream you'll have.
It's a priority for you.
If you can't afford it, though, you can't afford it.
And that's a hard conversation with your kid.
That's what I'm talking about.
Yeah, and, you know, the third month, not the third year.
I sue State Farm and I move out of a hotel
The third month
And if I have to pay for nursing home
For the 92-year-old neighbor
Just to make me feel good about that
I will or maybe not
Or go to my church and say
Maybe I can't do this.
I thought I could help this guy and I can't help this guy anymore
I'm not in a position
Because only the strong can help the week
And right now our knees are broken
And we can't do anything
And so no we can't pay for med school
And no I'm not living in a hotel
and no, I'm not putting out requirements for a 92-year-old neighbor that caused me to go completely broke and lose everything I owned because I stayed in hotel two and a half years longer than I should have.
So I think you've got to start putting some limitations on some of these things that you keep declaring as absolutes in this conversation.
The absolute is we've got to have a place to live and we've got to keep our daughters healthy.
And outside of that, I think everything's got to be back on the team.
And $188,000 will do those things.
Yeah.
without credit card debt and without parsing it out and parsing it out and parsing it out and parsing it out
you know so and you know just if if it's any consolation to you at allstate farm has a horrible
reputation on claims you're not the only one so soothe her butt but i'm not going to wait
around on them to fix my life either john i came away from that last call
feeling like I was too tough on her because she's been through a lot, bless her heart.
But there's some kind of a thing that I guess you can guide us through from a counseling perspective.
I could do it almost from a business acumen perspective.
But when tragedy occurs, not if, in your life.
it's going to have financial implications.
Correct.
How do you, because I meet people, and she had done some of this,
I mean, bless her heart, she's been through hell.
It's awful, okay?
And so I should have been probably more sympathetic,
but there's something that happens, and I did it, I think.
I think I did it during bankruptcy.
it like it gives us permission uh to be illogical in setting boundaries for ourselves
you know it's like okay this has happened and so now all the rules don't count
does that mean you know what I'm saying totally it's like a human nature thing I can think
of times I've done it too not so it's not just poor Kim with what the hell they've been through
no I've done it yeah but the um that there's also how how can
can we coach folks that are listening to say, okay, well, what should you do when
tragedy occurs? Somehow you've got to put, you've got to truncate the, you've got to cut off
the damage, not expand the damage. Yeah. The only path, and I've, I've wrestled with this
for a couple of decades, sitting with somebody whose life was going one way, and it was
often started with my college students. Like, they would be having a plan to go do a thing,
and then mom would get cancer
and they want to
continue their degree
in molecular biology
but also
and it always came back to
hey hey
everything in your life is different now
and we have to start here
and but I don't want to
you're right
it's not fair you're right
this shouldn't happen
you're right and yet
here we are
so the old phrase is you have a new normal
you have a new normal
and so the only thing I've seen people do
to be successful in my own life
in folks I've sat with is this word that we have an allergy to in our society, which is grief.
You have to spend some time just mourning. This thing is over now. And now I have to move forward.
I wanted to pay for my kids college, but now my husband had a stroke and we've got to pay hospital bills.
And I've got to sit down with my sophomore in college and say, this blows up your whole life and I'm so sorry, but here's reality.
And instead of- I wanted to take care of my 92-year-old neighbor.
I wanted to. What a noble, amazing thing. And.
Suddenly, I don't have any money.
I wanted, I kept thinking, I don't have a house.
Right.
I kept thinking that in two more months, they're going to get this thing rolling again.
And then two more months, after four months, three months, six months, I have to say, there's
nobody coming.
And we are racking up bill after bill at this hotel.
We sure is credit state farm ain't coming.
We have to do something different.
Yeah.
Right.
And I was telling you off there, I had a family member that lost their house in the Texas floods.
They lived in a hunting trailer for months because that's all.
they had not because they're noble or tough or anything it's it's all we had or the alternative is
i'm going to put myself in jeopardy in my older age and run up a whole bunch of deaths i'm never
going to be able to pay off and it's that the folks that i see are able to experience tragedy
which we all will and we talk about resilience we talk about growing from or there's a big word
post-traumatic growth right those that i see make that move are the ones who can sit in that exhale
grief and say, everything's different now. What's my next right move? And if you can do that,
there's, it's an amazing trajectory. If you don't, you drag that past and it's this weird,
I have permission to just go buy that meal. I have permission just to stay in this place for
two and a half years. I have permission to keep doing the awesome work I was doing with my
elderly neighbor, even though reality says you can't afford it. It's not going to happen.
And we're using hers as an example. Of course. I'm not picking on her. It's all.
All of us.
No, I wouldn't wish what she's experienced on anybody.
Yeah, I do want to go back and, you know, lighten that up a little bit.
But the lesson, because one of the reasons you should listen to the show is the lessons.
Right, right, right.
Not just the entertainment value of people's stuff.
But you ought to say, okay, what's a lesson I can take away so I don't end up there?
Well, the lesson is you limit the financial impact of the tragedy by restarting your life with a new definition.
quickly as quickly as you can get there yeah and sometimes um you don't feel your way into that you
start acting your way into that the feelings will come later up and down like a roller coaster
but i'm going to make the next right move is which is okay i'll give you an example here's what i do
all the time okay for 30 years we're getting a divorce and the lady calls and says uh i make
30 000 he makes 100 000 and i want to keep the house for the kids i don't want to disrupt
I don't want to disrupt the kid's life.
A thousand times out of a thousand, I say, honey, you've got to sell the house.
Because the life you used to have is no more.
You no longer have a $130,000 income.
You have a $30,000 income.
And you can't afford this house.
The kids are already disrupted.
Everything's disrupted.
It's called divorce.
And so they're restarting.
The best thing you can do for them is to restart them on solid ground, not a sinking ship.
And you trying to keep this house as a sinking ship.
Right. So restart, reset your vision of your life. And that's a little miniature one-off
version of what we're talking about. Or we talked, we talked to folks all the time who I was making
$120,000, my company did layoffs, and now I'm in month nine with no income. And they'll spin up
a lot of activity. I've got on LinkedIn and sent out 10,000 resumes via email. No one's
getting back to me. So I think, yeah, when you're going back to that reality. Exactly.
So when you are restarting, one of the things you have to do is take inventory of what is still there.
What is still here?
The income, this is the income that I do have.
And this is, I have, you know, it's almost like count your blessings.
Yeah.
Okay.
Here's what I do have to work with as opposed to what I used to have to work with.
And what I do have is a situation in Texas where everybody got wiped out at once in that area.
So finding a contractor, dadgum near impossible.
that's right. And so I don't have a, uh, an overabundance of contractors to work with.
Right. Okay. I don't have that. And so what do I have? I got a hunting trailer. I got an old
hunting trailer with an air conditioner. I plug it in and we're going to make a go of it. And until we can
get the contractors to show up because everybody else is in line. And, um, uh, I, I can tell you this.
There are, the city of New Orleans was virtually destroyed a couple of decades ago by a hurricane
called Katrina. And there are Cajun restaurants all over the United States today from people who
left New Orleans because they had to start over. Yeah. And they couldn't start over there. I was in
Houston. So many people came and said, new restaurant, man, we got to start here because my home
doesn't exist. Yeah. My life, as I knew it before, I have to restart. And in some cases,
it's pull up stakes and go to a whole other area. That's right. Is that fun? No. Do you lose your
family heritage? Yes. Is it a night? Do you weep? Yes. And
this thing reality just keeps chugging along math doesn't change and it's hard and so if you're
in the middle of a storm like poor kim has gone through multiple storms at once and she like the
perfect storm is awful um the only thing we can tell you is take stock of what you do have not what
you used to have and reset a new vision that fits within those numbers and the other stuff is you have
sadly say no to. That's right. I can't live in this area anymore. You can't go to this
school anymore. I can't take care of this anymore. I can't do this. And you're going to have a
whole lot of can'ts. And that's what I mean by truncating. You're going to have to stop doing some things
that you used to were able to do in order to create a new life with the new limitations and in the
new situation that is healthy and that doesn't follow your own. Because if you don't, you end up with
two decades to clean up the mess. The tragedy goes on indefinitely. Until you stop. Until you stop.
Yeah, trying to recreate the old life.
Yeah.
And this happens if there's an...
It's not fair, by the way.
It's not. It's not fair.
And this happens if you have an affair in your marriage.
This happens if you lose a job.
It happens to all of us multiple times throughout our lives.
The quicker you can exhale, sometimes getting out a pen and a piece of paper.
What is true mathematically?
What's true?
What do I have?
What am I grateful for?
I got a trailer in the back.
I'm going to have to move in there.
and then that's the ash with which you plant the tree and man new trees can grow but you got to plant them in soil of reality
in the lobby of ramsie solutions on the debt free stage ryan and amber are with us hey guys how are you
doing great welcome welcome where do you all live spring growled minnesota southeast minnesota cool
Well, welcome to Tennessee.
Good to have you.
And all the way here to do a debt-free scream.
How much have you paid off?
$180,000.
Very cool.
Over 32 months.
32 months.
And your range of income during that two and a half years?
Started at 140 and got up to $180.
Cool.
What do y'all do for a living?
I'm a construction superintendent for a general contractor.
And I do ultrasounds.
Oh, very cool.
Good for y'all.
Very good.
So what kind of debt was the $180?
It was our house.
Oh!
Look at it weird people.
people. Young weird people.
Paid off a house early. I love it.
Yep.
So what's this house worth?
We're selling right now and be right around 300.
Good for you guys. Way to go.
And how much you guys got in your nest eggs already?
Your 401 case and stuff.
Just a little over 200 right now.
All right. So you're about a halfway to a millionaire already.
Yeah.
And you're what, 30? How old are you?
28 and 27.
There it is. Not even 30.
Wow.
You all didn't get to memo.
You're not allowed to do that anymore.
You're not able to do that.
anymore. Yeah, it's different to be weird, but it's all right. Well, congratulations. How long
y'all been married? Four years. Okay. And two and a half of that, you've been tearing into this
mortgage. So tell us the story. How did you get tied into Ramsey? My first employer had
smart dollars, so got tied into that and then followed the baby steps from there. So we originally
bought the house, and we were working on like side projects in the house.
This is a little fixer-upper working on our side projects.
And then the spring came around like a year and a half into buying the house.
And we wanted to do some siding exterior updates.
And I was like, so we had some money set aside for that.
And I was like, let's just pause on that.
Let's pay the house off.
So actually it was, what was it for the months that we paid it off?
It was 13 months.
We paid off $132,000.
So we just paused all our projects and then put $132 away and 13 months.
that last year was really intense yeah very nice okay we want to get to these projects so we're knocking
this puppy out yeah yeah wow wow very cool yeah i wasn't on board at first entirely um i really want to do
that siding but there's a point where it was projects that we needed to have done and projects
that we didn't need to have done and when we sat down and ryan's like this is how much we're
spending on interest it's like oh my gosh it's just insane eye opening over the life of the loan how much
you would pay.
Y'all don't realize it yet because you've been married four years.
But most couples get to the, oh, I didn't know we could get through this after a major
crisis.
And y'all decided early on, let's tackle a big, monumental thing that nobody else is doing
together.
Y'all don't know this yet, but y'all have proven to yourselves there's not a thing that
the two of us can't lock arms and tackle together over the course of your entire marriage
together.
It's so, I'm a smile all day.
This is awesome.
This is fantastic, man.
Yeah, there's so many good things that have happened to you,
what you've become while you're doing this.
So proud of you.
Have you got the siding done since you've paid it off?
No, that's the next spring thing.
First, I upgraded my car.
Good.
I was driving at 08 Impala.
It had, what, 210,000 miles on it.
That thing was so loud.
It was very embarrassing, but you learned not to care what people think.
I love it.
So, yeah, you needed a car.
Yeah.
I'm glad you did that.
Yeah.
So first goal was that, then we'll do the siding next spring.
And so we just start laying out, now that we don't have a payment in the world,
we start laying out goals and knocking down goals, right?
Yeah, exactly.
Travel, car, siding, whatever it is, right?
Amber, let me ask you this.
Okay, I've had projects that start burning a hole.
Every time I pull in the driveway, that's all I see.
I don't see the house.
I don't see the house.
I don't see my wife kids.
I just see that.
But when you grind out another goal, I stop seeing it all the time.
Right.
Has it become less a burr in your soul?
Yeah, it's like, it's worth it.
It's like the house is paid for now, and I can wait a year on siting.
It's okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Very good.
Way to go, you guys.
All right, what do you tell people that are 25 years old and they want to pay off their house?
It can't be done.
America is dead.
The capitalism is killing everyone.
It's a systemic problem.
We're all stuck.
Oh, wait a minute.
Hold my beer.
Ryan and Amber just paid off their house at 28 years old.
What do you tell them the key to getting out of debt is?
I would say by far the biggest key is to just forget what other people think about you.
It's your own money.
You're working hard for it.
Live your own life.
Live your own goals.
I think we were listening to the podcast a couple weeks back, and Jade said it best,
she said, the biggest superpower you can have with money is not caring what other people think.
That's so true.
So you did have some other people that had some thoughts, huh?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
You definitely get weird looks, that's for sure.
yeah because people know how that y'all aren't starving right they know y'all are doing well and then
they can hear your car coming nine miles away and they're like hey you know you can get a new car
and it's hard i mean the temptation is definitely hard but i mean at the end of the day it's worth it
because when you're making that kind of money you can literally on the way home pull into a dealership
and go home with a new car that day right with just a signature right and to just go home and
grind. That's so cool, man.
Who taught you both?
Because this is a, and again,
I'm kind of hijacking this call.
I'm this conversation.
Who taught y'all to sit down together
and to say, I want this?
And the other person say, well, I want this.
And we're going to talk about this, not as enemies,
but as, okay, we both want different things,
but we're going to come to some sort of solution.
That had to have been modeled somewhere for you,
or y'all just, are y'all even weirder than paid off house people?
Where'd you get that from?
Did your parents model that for you?
My parents definitely did for me, yeah.
Yeah, I'd say our parents were big models and that.
And somebody once told me, it's not you and him, it's not you versus him in a problem.
It's you and him versus the problem.
Tada.
Tada.
There it is.
I know, but people told me a lot of stuff when I was 24.
I didn't listen to them.
Man, that's so amazing.
That's good.
That's very good.
Well done.
all right so the secret is not caring what other people think that absolutely and then that frees
you up to just do what you think and decide who gets a vote and if it's not one of us nobody else
gets a vote so who was cheering you on lots of friends co-workers parents of course our biggest thing
is probably just how competitive we are though because we Dave not to like make you as an insult
but we would call each other davish if one of us started slacking oh
you're an ish
it's like a Dr. Zeus character
you're an ish
don't be an ish
is a wish
I like it
that's good
y'all are the only ones
in America
that uses the name
that's mean
he uses Dave as an insult
so
you're a good company
that's good
I like it
I like it
I'll take it
my name gets used
a lot of other ways
I was gonna say
y'all are the only ones
that use Dave as an insult
so that's at least
a positive methodology
I'll go with that
good job you guys
very very very good job
So when your mom and dad actually realize you're actually doing this, what did their face look?
I mean, like, Mom, we just wrote the last check.
We're done.
So my dad, I would meet him every week for lunch, and it'd always tell him, like, where we're at.
And he'd be like, oh, I'm so proud of you.
Like, that was huge just to have that reinforcement all the time.
But my parents actually paid their house off in four years.
So I was kind of like, we got to beat that four years.
Oh, you are competitive.
Dad.
Nah, na, nah, nah.
Yeah, I like that.
Very good.
Gosh, can I just say this to all the dads out there?
How proud is he of that?
You want to have an amazing daughter that grows up into an amazing woman?
Have lunch with her every week and never let her leave a table without you look at her in the eyes and saying, I'm proud of you.
Yeah.
That's huge.
That's huge.
That's a superpower.
I mean, your dad gave you everything.
And you got to, man, you're going to have to get pants to go all the way to.
the floor now, dude, because you got yourself a rock star you're married to.
It's amazing. It's amazing. All right, you guys. I'm proud of y'all. We're proud of you
too, just like your dad is. So proud of you, man. Ryan and Amber from Minnesota, $180,000 paid off
in 32 months, house and everything. They're not even 30, and they're already halfway to be in
Baby Steps Millionaires. They'll be there in about 20 minutes at this rate, making 140 up to
180. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one, we're debt-free.
Yeah!
Whoop, who, whip, whip, whip, whip. Yeah, baby. That's how it's done.
Anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words.
Leave that home or town and shake the dust off of your feet.
Thomas Sowell said,
You can't stop people from saying bad things about you.
All you can do is make them liars.
That's pretty good.
As you well know by now, the Fed has dropped rates,
and mortgage rates have followed slightly.
They dropped them slightly, and mortgage rates have followed a little bit.
5.71 right now for a 15-year fixed.
If you're financially ready, now's a great time to buy or sell.
Buying or selling an affordable home you love is possible when you work with a Ramsey trusted real estate agent.
These pros are handpicked to guide you through the market and keep your financial goals top of mind.
Find a trusted local pro for free at Ramsey Solutions.com slash agents or click the link in the show notes.
Lanes in Ohio.
Hi, Lane.
How are you?
Good.
How are you?
Better than I deserve.
What's up?
So me and my fiance
We're 21 and 22
So let's live with our parents
We're looking to move out
Probably in May when she graduates college
And we don't really know if we should
Buy a car for her first
Or wait until we buy a house
But I don't know if we buy a car
If we'll have 20% down for house
You can wait on the house
You need to get a car first
It's okay
It's okay to rent an apartment for a year
year and you guys save up some money and if you use part of the money you've saved to buy her a car
for cash then you need to replenish that for your down payment fund to be full again if that takes
a year and you rent a little apartment for a year that is not going to set you back in your life
you're going to be fine okay uh do you uh should we put 20% down on our house or should we
how to just do an FHA one.
Well, FHA has MIP, which is much like PMI.
PMI's private mortgage insurance.
Mortgage Insurance Premium is what MIP stands for.
And FHA is a much more expensive loan in all the fees and the interest rates than a conventional loan.
So if you have the ability to put together 20% on your first home, you're better off to do a conventional loan than an FHA loan.
But you don't have to worry about that.
that right now for about almost two years from right now because she's graduating in
May you're getting married then sounds like and then we're going to get her a car and then
we're going to rent for a year and that puts you almost two years from now yeah so the thing you
need right now is one of the fruits of the spirit a healthy dose of patience man you want to give
her the world you're going to give her everything and I love that but slow down yeah it's going
be good, man. Back it, back it off. Slow your roll. Nicky's in California. Hey, Nikki, how are you?
Hi, John. Hi, Dave. Thanks for taking my call. Sure. What's up? I'm calling because my husband
and I are in a little over $300,000 worth of debt. About 120 of it is IRS debt, and my fault.
but I know you say, you know, do whatever you need to do to break away from the IRS.
They sent notices for liens and levies and all that.
So we set up a payment plan, but I am wondering how desperate we need to get in this situation.
Very.
What's your household income?
We make about 350,000.
Okay.
Why, pray, tell, do you owe the IRS 120 then?
Well, okay, so I was previously divorced, and at that time, I'm a nurse now.
I'm making money now, but at that time, I was not.
I had three kids.
I literally just put my head down and worked and worked and worked just to keep a loop over our head.
I did not file taxes, probably for,
about four years.
Oh, okay.
And now you've gone back, you've gotten remarried, and now you've gone and filed.
Yes, I went and filed, and then our income together is just way too much, so obviously
we owed that first year, so, yeah.
Yeah, okay.
And what's the rest of the $300,000 in debt?
So we've got about 100 in student loans, and the rest of it is credit cards and personal
loan.
Okay.
All right. And so you've got $80,000 in credit card debt?
Yep, about that.
How long have you all been married?
We just got married in 23, June of 23.
Okay. And who brought the credit card debt?
Well, so, I mean, we both had some.
I had gone through...
Has it continued to grow after you got married?
no we've been we've been paying it down since so we've gotten rid of several all right so
you here's where we are today today you make 350,000 you got $300,000 in debt
and what part of California do you live in?
The area is the most expensive part absolutely you do okay all right and how much is your house
payment uh 5,000 and what's your house worth
uh about 780 and we just bought it in 23 so it we bought it for 750 that's probably worth
more than 780 then if you bought it in 23 well that's what zillow well zillow zillow
okay yeah okay so let's go with 900 and what do you owe on the house um about six 620 maybe
okay all right so you guys are living right on the
edge on everything.
Everything's got a payment on it.
Everything's locked down.
We make $350,000 and we feel broke.
Pretty much.
Yeah.
Okay.
And it's not a super expensive house for San Francisco.
I mean, that's a cheap house, really, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What do you do for a living?
You're a nurse.
What's he do?
He's a manager.
Manager.
Okay.
all right well uh what i'm going to do is buckle down and live on nothing pretend like i am
broke because you are and i'm going to cut up all the credit cards we're not going to use them anymore
we're going to a written budget every month you and your husband you don't make 350 000 you make
50 000 and you need to pay off 300 worth of debt or you make 100 000 and you're going to pay off
250 000 worth of debt and be debt free in about two years
starting with the blessed IRS and then work your way through a debt snowball on the other stuff
after you get rid of the IRS.
But you guys need to go pay them like your hairs on fire and get them out of your life
because the penalties and the interests that they're charging you are the worst on the planet
and they have almost unlimited power to come and mess with your life.
Even when you're on a payment plan, they might make a clerical error and put a lien on your house.
even though you're on a payment plan.
They can if they want to.
And so what I want you to is get them out of your life,
like your life depended on it.
So I think what's happened is you guys are living a Bay lifestyle,
and you're eating up your 300 grand,
and you're not making much progress on this debt.
And I want you to live a lifestyle
as if you lived somewhere else and didn't have a life
because you don't.
You're broke.
Act like it.
And attack this deal.
debt with a vengeance. Yeah, and I hear in your story, Nikki, and even in your voice, that fear of
that single mom who has just put her head down and try to keep a roof over the head of her babies
during a really chaotic time. It would be easy to say, you shouldn't have spent all that,
yada, yada, I just want to say I'm proud of you for getting through that four years. And it's easy
to think, I got my degree, I'm a nurse, I married a guy who makes a good income together,
we have a good income and to take your foot off the gas. And I want you to let that woman who's been
grinding it out finally be free. And that means you got two years of hitting the gas. And I'm telling
you on the other side of this with nothing but a house payment making $350,000, you are going to
finally feel that piece you've been craving for so many years. But there's no other way than through
this thing. So just get through it as fast as you possibly can. No restaurants.
No fancy cars, and everyone's going to be like, I thought you were, yep, as for me and my house,
we will not be owned by anybody. And I'll say it again, there's only one way through it,
only one way and that's through it. Just get through it as fast as you possibly can.
That puts us out of the Ramsey Show in the books. We'll be back with you before you know it.
In the meantime, remember, there's ultimately only one way to financial peace, and that's to walk daily
with the Prince of Peace, Christ Jesus.
You know,