The Ramsey Show - App - You Can't Blame Your Way to a Better Life (Own It!) (Hour 1)

Episode Date: December 12, 2022

Dave Ramsey & Jade Warshaw discuss: Handling money from a side-hustle, Whether or not you can afford to buy a new car, What counts as financial infidelity, The best investing strategy. Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 Weekdays from 2-5pm ET Want a plan for your money? Find out where to start: https://bit.ly/3nInETX Listen to all The Ramsey Network podcasts: https://bit.ly/3GxiXm6 Learn more about your ad choices. https://www.megaphone.fm/adchoices Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy

Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the pods moving and storage studios, it's the Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of BMW as the status symbol of choice. We help people build wealth, do work that they love, and create actual amazing relationships. I'm your host, Dave Ramsey.

Jade Warshaw, Ramsey personality, newly minted. We're here. Has been on a couple of times on the air so far and going to do this hour with me is my co-host today, open phones at 888-825-5225. Just a reminder, Jade has led a bazillion Financial Peace University classes, has listened to every show that I've ever done in 30 years, so she knows all the answers to all the questions. Oh, and she and Sam paid off almost a half a million dollars in debt. Okay, that's a tall order, Dave, but the $460,000 of debt, that one's about right.

The first one was correct. The first one was correct. I mean, no, the last one was correct. Yeah, and the FPU part. The others might have been slightly exaggerated. Slightly, slightly. Definitely listened to you for the better part of 15 years, almost all three hours. Well, you and Sam used to play answer the question in the car before I did.

Yes, we did. People would ask questions. Y'all see if you could beat me to it. Oh, yeah. You're talking about true nerds here. And I used to put the personalities to the test. When they came in, I listened very closely to those answers. But of course, they were nailing it too. So of course. And now you just lied again because they don't always nail it. well you know that's not for me to say dave that's for you to say all right let's start off with chicago david is on the line hi david welcome to the ramsey show hi excited to talk with you all today you too thanks for taking my call sure what's up

so i have a side hustle that has turned into something far more lucrative than i thought it could ever be to be honest with you that's great and it's making yeah it's making real money help me what's real money um i made thirty thousand dollars last year with it thirty thousand as a side hustle that's good okay totally unexpected side hustle. But I cannot tell you where a single one of those $30,000 went. I looked at the reporting over the weekend and I almost threw up. So, yeah. My question is, how do I tame this side hustle? Because it's very hand-to-mouth, my own personal thing.

No one watches it. I work and I get paid. I just want to be better with it and actually have some money to look at at the end of the year. What are you doing, dude? So you might be able to hear it in the background, but I'm actually a bird sitter. I was going to say it sounded like animals. She is not calming down and I, she will knock it off of me, but here we are. But no, I, I bird sit for for about 100 different parrots in Chicago.

Oh my goodness. And I'm the number one guy on Google if you search bird sitting Chicago. I'm the first guy that pops up. So 2023 could be a big year for me. And I, again, just want to make sure I'm not burning the cash as it comes in. Is it just you? You're the only one bird sitting? It is just me, yeah. so i have a certification i've

worked with parrots for over half my life and i'm very very good with them um but yes it's just me and my me and my ultima driving around taking care of the birds wow very cool good for you man that's fun thank you so the easiest way to get started on this is just treat it like a business, because it is. And I would just open up a separate checking account, BirdSittersRUs or whatever it is, right? And just put your name on there, David so-and-so, DBA, doing business as BirdSittersRUs. And you just do it in your Social Security number. You don't even need a tax ID number to do it. And then throw all of your bird-sitting money into that account.

And then you can just pull up the register on that account at any point, and you can tell what's going on. You can tell where the money is, right? And then if you pull it out of there to bring it home, quote, unquote, out of the business, you need to set aside a fourth of it for taxes, because as you have discovered you have seven thousand five hundred dollars in taxes due on this don't you sure do yep and don't have any money well that i was smart enough to do to like have it move um the processor that i use will save the taxes for you so i have

that set aside at least so i'm not like facing down uncle sam with a frown face good um i do have another kind of follow-up question. How do you find the discipline? Because I did that. I made a checking account and I'm like, Oh, I'm not going to look at the money. And then I'm like, Oh, this thing, this thing, this thing. It just, it just goes. My mom says I'm like a sieve with cash. Wait a minute.

It goes out of the, it goes out of the bird account. Yeah. I just spend it. Like, what are some tips for discipline on that? Like, okay. You don't have a budget on your personal account do you i don't have a budget on anything yeah i know i could tell it sounds like he needs to sit down and and keep his money separate you've got your personal money on one side you've got your business money on a separate side and uh david it sounds like with your business you really need to get organized and write down what your outgo is, what your expenses are, right? And how much money that you're bringing in

to find out if you really can't, you know, and decide, can I take a payroll? If I can, it's going to be this amount and I'm going to do it, you know, every month and really just get organized. It sounds like that's really what you're lacking because the business sounds like it's making money. It almost sounds like it's making so much money for you that you feel like you can be frivolous. And I think that that's a dangerous place to be lazy. What's the what's your day job pay? So I make 70K a year. So you have one hundred thousand dollars coming in.

How old are you? Thirty three. And you're broke. Yes. OK, here's your why. You need to get disgusted with how stupid that is. Yes, it is so stupid. I know.

I mean, that's a good thing. I mean, it's like after COVID, I ate so many donuts that I got disgusted about how fat I got. Sure. Because I ate every donut in a 50-mile. So you have to get disgusted and go, I'm going to change this crap. This is crazy and i you know you got to have there's a healthy level of disgust that precedes human transformation like i've had it i'm sick and tired of being sick and tired i don't like this feeling

of being this inept i don't like this taste of regret with a hundred grand going through my fingers and i have no idea where it goes that taste on my tongue is awful it's like a bad fruit cake this time of year right and so i want to stop that so now now we've got you and you called here and so you already knew right you are you know. You told me what I just told you back. I didn't tell you anything new. I'm not, you called him stupid. No, I just said, well, you're stupid, okay? So, you know, but so here's the thing.

Now you got to, now you got to why? Because if you keep eating like you've been eating, you're going to keep looking like you've been looking. You keep spending like you've been spending. You're going to keep being broke like you've been broke. You got to change your habits. So we're going to sit down and do a personal budget on where the money's going to go and then when we move money out of the bird account into the personal account minus tax withholding then we've got an assignment for it already preset in the personal budget but the

personal budget is just regret avoidance. It's just financial hangover avoidance. Like I drank too much and I feel like crap for three days, right? It's the same thing. You got this hangover, and it's the exact same thing. You've been partying, and you're tired of it. You just said, I'm going to grow up. Good for you. Well done.

We're going to help you. Hang on. Send you a copy of the book, The Total Money Makeover, which will walk you through exactly what to do. But you just need to say, I'm worth fixing this because I don't like where I am, so I'm going to change it. This is the Ramsey Show. Thank you. newly minted ramsey personality jade warshaw is my co-host today she starts her career off with a bird sitter here on the ramsey show This is how we break them in here. We do it right. I'm glad to know it was birds.

At first, I thought it was monkeys. Oh, I don't count on one hand the number of bird questions I've gotten over 30 years, but we just added them. We start you off with that. So there you go. Our question today comes from blinds.com find out for yourself why blinds.com is the number one online retailer of custom window covering you get free samples free shipping and with the new promos they run every month you'll save even more always use the

magic word to get the deals it's ramsey that's the promo code ramsey all right today's question comes from linda in colorado she says. My husband changed positions within his company and needs to return his company work truck. And we now need to buy a quote new truck. A lot of new trucks and used trucks are within a few thousand dollars of each other. Sometimes you'd used ones are almost the same as new. I've heard you say many times not to buy new because of the immediate depreciation of driving it off. But does this weird market skew that advice? My husband also reminded me that you said that if you have enough money, you should just buy what you want. Even though we are debt free and have a $5 million assets and cash, I am still kind of a penny pincher and want to keep the truck at or under 30K. What advice can you give us regarding new or used? Oh man, I love this question. You know, I get it. Like I think sometimes you can look at the car market and you can think, okay, like I want to do everything the Dave way. And especially with them, it sounds like they're well into baby

step seven. You know, I think sometimes when you're in that you just get used to that that feeling of holding back and you know putting aside but you know i think that you guys have earned the right linda to go ahead and buy this truck you've got five million in net worth and and we teach here that if you're if your net worth is over a million dollars you have earned the right to purchase the car that you would like to drive. And not only a used vehicle, you could actually purchase it outright. Now, if that doesn't feel right for you, I think that's fine. But basically, right now, I'm just giving you permission to go ahead and get the car that or the truck in this case that you're wanting to get. Now, you gave him permission to get the truck. She didn't want to. No, that's true. She didn't want to no that's true she didn't want to and they

still might not she wanted us to tell him he can't buy a truck when he's got five million dollars dude buy whatever truck you want buy the truck seriously that's ridiculous and she wants to keep it under 30k i don't know no no no you need to get a good truck yeah let him go ham big truck big expensive five million dollars i mean seriously seriously. Now, you drive like no one else, so later you can drive like no one else. Yep. And so that's the thing, and you're in great shape. It has nothing to do with the new market versus the used market. I don't need to give you a rationalization.

The only rationalization for you buying a brand new freaking truck with five million dollars is you want it, or in this case, he wants it. So buy the man a truck that's what you do that's why you do this it's a small thing yeah it's just it if you listen let's say he drives a sixty thousand dollar truck all right let's double her thing forgets to put insurance on it doesn't set the parking brake it rolls off the cliff right so now instead of five million dollars they have four million it's a fraction nine hundred and forty thousand dollars they're still rich do it again tomorrow well it still doesn't matter the point is it doesn't matter that's right it's a very small piece that's when you know you can

afford it yep it doesn't matter mathematically you know when you don't do it is when you make fifty thousand dollars a year and you buy a sixty thousand dollar truck and you've still got a student loan debt and three credit cards and your sixty thousand dollar truck turns into thirty thousand in value in 13 seconds and then you scratch your head and wonder why you can't fund your kid's college fund because you're broke see that's stupid straight up yeah because the new market and the east market are close oh shut up you're broke you don't need to buy a truck that's stupid straight up yeah because the new market and the east market are close oh shut up you're broke you don't need to buy a truck that's what you know so don't the rationalization doesn't matter it's the reasoning and the reasoning's got to do with the ratio so you're exactly right jade

lady you're sweet and you're kind and you're penny pitching ways is what got y'all here but you need to enjoy the money too. I'll tell you one other thing you need to do. You need to turn up your generosity button about three notches. That's it. Crank it up a little more, and that'll help you with your penny pinching. That's so good. When you're giving more, it also allows you to enjoy the money more

in personal purchases without feeling like you've done something wrong. Absolutely, because then again, you're playing that ratio game. Exactly, exactly. Tim is with us in Kansas City. Hi, Tim. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Hi. You didn't want to talk about being better than I deserve.

I get to talk to you guys today. I love it. Bless your heart. Merry Christmas to you. How can we help? Merry Christmas to you. So I have a question. I want to know if a decision that I want to make would be considered in your guys' eyes, financial infidelity. And so my wife and I, I've been

listening to you for a long time. You know, my wife is not on a hundred percent on board. We've, we've come to like an agreement between the Dave Ramsey way and the not Dave Ramsey way. And that basically is we've, we've paid off all of our debt, right? We have no debt except an RV. And we've had this RV for a couple of years. And the agreement we came to was she said, I don't care if everything falls apart and they come take this thing away. It doesn't matter.

It's a luxury. And, you know, I say, okay, so I could agree to that, but still deep down, I'm like, man, I just want to pay it off, you know? And, and, you know, we, we have enough money, you know, enough margin, uh, that I could, you know, how much is the RV worth? Uh, probably about 20 000 what do you own it about 17 you got the money in the bank to pay it off um not not outside of our uh emergency fund no okay i mean i i mean all of my money is so where's the infidelity where is it you're going to be lying to your wife? That's my question.

Well, the lie would be we agreed. Like, I agreed that, yes, okay, we would work towards paying off all of our debt, but she said, no, I don't want to spend extra time and money paying off the RV because, like she said... What does she want to do with the money? So if you've got the margin laying around in your budget, what does she want to do with that money?

We moved on to, um, you know, following baby steps. No, you didn't. You moved on to your own plan. You're not following the baby steps. Oh, I agree. I agree. Then don't, then don't say it. Okay. Yeah. So, I mean, we, we funded our emergency fund and started contributing to retirement okay now what this means is you ever how old are you 41 okay when i was a little kid which is like a thousand years ago he's probably

older than you probably way older you probably don't remember this we played this dumb game called mother may i and if you took a step forward without permission, you had to take two steps backward. Do you remember that? I do. Okay. That's where you are. You took steps forward without permission. Now you've got to take two steps back.

Meaning you guys got to get back to ground zero and start talking again about the vision for our life, about where we want to be when we're 70 years old. Do I want to have a freaking RV payment when I'm 90? Right. Let's back up to that. Instead of you agreed to some stupid butt stuff you shouldn't have agreed to, and you guys need to back up and work on your marriage and communication and value combination, and then the RV becomes a symptom, not the problem.

Okay. That make sense the problem. Okay. That make sense? Yeah. Yeah. So my bottom line is this. You acquiesced, and I'm not suggesting you stir up trouble all the time in your marriage, but by acquiescing, you were under the illusion that you all were now in agreement, and you're still not in agreement.

It's lucky that you guys got that debt paid off. That kind of happened by accident. Well, he did it. She agreed to that part of it. He agreed to that part of it. So we accomplished the one goal, but you're not in agreement about how money should be handled and life should be lived. That fooled them into thinking that they were on the same page,

but you guys are nowhere near it. Yeah, you're still not. because you're calling us saying, I don't want to do this. Exactly. I made a bad deal with my wife, and I got to go back and undo the deal because I didn't really believe what I did. And so that's what I'm saying. Two steps back, let's reset the vision for our marriage, and then the RV thing is a non-issue. Because it's honestly pretty stinking silly that you've got this debt on this RV. It really is. It's not just picking on you or her, but I mean, do you want to be 92 with an RV debt?

No. Well, the RV debt's not the problem. It's the symptom. Exactly right. This is The Ramsey Show. Are you sick of planned obsolescence? You know, when companies make products crappy so you have to buy more of their crappy products? Well, me too.

And it's why I love companies like Grip6. Grip6 is all about quality products meant to last forever. That's why their comfortable, bulk-free belts, slimline wallets, and lightweight wool socks all come with a lifetime warranty and simple returns and exchanges. So check them out at Grip6.com today and get up to 20% off with the promo code RAMSEY. Merry Christmas, America. Welcome to the Ramsey Show. Jade Warshaw, Ramsey personality, is my co-host today as we answer your questions about your life and your money. Jeff is with us. Jeff's in Salt Lake City.

Hi, Jeff. How are you? Hey, how you guys doing? Jade, welcome to the show. Thanks a lot, Jeff. It's good to be here. Glad to be with you. I just wanted to, before my question, just wanted to quickly say thanks, Dave, so much. You know, three years ago, I was in $90,000 in student debt.

And as of today, I am $0 in student debt. Woo! Way to go, hero. Well done. Just wanted to say, wouldn't have done it without you, man. I tuned into you during COVID. So my question is, is there a strategy to maxing out your Roth IRA? Should I do it January 1st and get it done with and put it all in, max it out for me and my wife at the beginning of the year?

Or is there some strategy of taking more time throughout the year to max that out? Okay. Well, the industry teaches a wonderful process called dollar cost averaging. That if you, when you're steadily investing a little bit every month, like in your 401k, or if you set your IRA up to be on a monthly draw, then in January, the market is down, you're buying cheap shares. Later on you're buying more expensive shares as the market goes up and it goes back down, you're buying cheap shares. So you get this, the average of your dollars across dollar cost averaging and you get to see this wonderful mathematical thing happen that shows your

money growing. And the other benefit of that is that it's not emotional at all because you just plug it in and never change it. You always invest. Now, having said that, what beats dollar cost averaging is a lump sum investment at the beginning of the year. The downside of that is it's very emotional because here's the rule. Here's the thing to think about. The market has averaged 11.8% since it started.

Okay? So let's say it averages. It did an average year. It made 11%. And you put in $8,000 at the beginning of the year in January. So you make 11% on $8,000 for 12 whole months. Right? Right. Follow me? thousand dollars for 12 whole months right right follow me if it runs average and you dole it out

one twelfth a month through the whole year you did not make 11 on eight thousand dollars you made 11 on about four thousand dollars right right you follow me so if the market is doing average or up lump sum is the thing. The average comes from a place. It's the average of the up and the down. So you can kind of count on average. Now, however, you could put in, let's just say out loud, you could put it in, and what would it do by the end of the year?

It could be worth less. Right, right. And so if it goes down, you know, it makes it worse if you lump sum it. But if the market continues to average what it has always averaged, on average, you're always going to come out better off lump summing. So I lump sum it. But that's because of averages. And so on average, most of the time that's going to work.

More times than not. That's great. But even if you made, let's see, 6%, 7% on $8,000 rather than 11% on $4,000, it'd be the same. You'd still make more money. Right. Even if the market didn't do what it usually does. Not as down, but it's just not up as much as it usually is so that's why it works out so as long as you can emotionally afford to open up your uh computer screen and go oh crap it went down

and you don't freak out right if you can do that i and i can do that because i never put it in i never look at it again once i put it in there i'm just thinking out 20 years i'm not thinking out to two days jeff if you max out your roth if you max out your roth is that your full 15 percent or what does that put you at percentage wise close to it close to it yeah i think i have a little bit more after that if i do it for me and my wife okay okay because i was thinking you might be able to get the best of both worlds in some ways where you're maxing out is this a roth 401k or an ira ira okay you can't lump sum a 401k oh that okay well there you go so he could get the the best of both worlds by lump summing that and then still doing some dollar cost averaging into his normal 401k 401k yeah that's true certainly the balance over there because you don't have a choice in normal 401k. Into a 401k, yeah, that's true. Certainly the balance over there, because you don't have a choice in the 401k.

You've got a dollar cost average. Right. That's right. Yeah, it does feel better. I know you're saying it's emotional. I actually think it's even easier on me. If January 1st, I can just do it all and say, hey, look, I'm like almost my 15% for the year.

I can kind of breathe and just get it done with. It almost feels a little easier for me. If you can set it and forget it, and a of people can but some people can't so you know if you're not going to be on twitter going dave ramsey told me to do this and here it is september and i lost this money oh shut up you didn't understand what the flip i was talking about okay no i got you you know if you're not that guy then we're okay but you know the most horrible advice i've ever heard in my life the guy who has told more people how to be millionaires than anybody else i listened to him for 20 seconds and no as long as you're not that idiot and you're not you're

not jeff i know he's not an idiot he's going to be a baby steps millionaire here in a minute i think you're right because a he's paying attention b he's asking questions like that absolutely good questions josh is with us josh is in louisville kentucky hi josh how are you You're right. Because A, he's paying attention. B, he's asking questions like that. Absolutely. Good questions. Josh is with us. Josh is in Louisville, Kentucky. Hi, Josh. How are you? Thanks for having me on.

Sure. What's up? So wanting to eliminate credit card debt by the end of 2023, but on the main income of my household and my wife has a hobby that she doesn't decide, but that's not enough to really tackle and eliminate the credit card debt. So I'm wondering, is it time to give up the hobby and get her to get a quote-unquote real job? What's y'all's income at this point combined? Combined, we're looking at approximately 60,000, 53 from me and then seven from her.

You said 63 from you and seven from her, so 70? No, 53 from me and then $7,000 from her. You said $63,000 from you and $7,000 from her, so $70,000? No, $53,000 from me and then $7,000. Okay, $60,000 total. And you said it's credit card debt. Is that all the debt you have in the world besides the mortgage? Is it just the credit cards, or is that just what you feel like you're focusing on right now? It's credit card.

Okay, and how much? $14,000. And you guys are working the baby steps in order? Have you guys? Yeah, we've tried, you know, the envelope and then budget, you know, all the spreadsheets. And we've tried, you know, the different methods. And, you know, it's easy to stick for, you know, a short period of time. But then, you know, get off course and then, yes.

You earning more money is not going to make you stay the course. And I think it's great to earn more money. I'm never opposed to that, Dave, but you sticking to your budget and you guys deciding that this is the plan, we're working the plan, that's got nothing to do with you earning money. You sticking to your budget doesn't have anything to do with you earning more money or not. That's you just deciding that, you and your wife getting together, deciding and saying, this is what we're doing. And we're pinky swearing on this. And we are trusting each other that this is the plan. And we're keeping our word on that. That's thing one. What do you do? do i work in finance how old are you 31 so you're

working 40 hours yes sir okay and what's her hobby that you're calling a hobby she works but she's done making money at it so she's got a side hustle that's breaking even she's an artist. And what type of artist? She paints and designs jewelry, so she's an acrylic artist. I see. Okay. And she puts, y'all have children? Yes, we have one child who's five. Okay, and how much time does she put into acrylic art to make $7,000 a year? The holiday season is the busiest time, and so she's putting in sometimes it's 12. The rest of the year, though, after the holiday season's over, she's not putting in three hours, four hours a week on it.

Oh, no. Total during the down seasons, I mean, it's probably total per week, you know, 12 to 20. Yeah. So, no, it's 12. It's not 20. Otherwise, you'd have a house full of this crap because it wasn't selling. Or you're selling it for a penny a piece. So, no.

So, yeah, I think she keeps her hobby and she picks up a side hustle and you pick up a side hustle. And the two of you commit to doing a budget. And then you pay off this debt in a year. Why don't you work twice as hard as her? That'll be okay. This is the Ramsey Show. All right, guys, the Ramsey Christmas Cash Giveaway ends in three days. Count them, one, two, three. That means you've got three more chances to win,

but you've got to go to RamseySolutions.com slash giveaway and enter. Enter every day to increase your chances to win our $5, grand prize of course no purchase necessary and you must be 18 to win ramsey solutions.com slash giveaway the ten dollar sale is going on while you're there check out the number one best-selling books like total money makeover baby steps millionaires all of rachel cruz's book all of john deloney's books and so on ten dollars hey that's like stocking stuffers hardback books what happened to inflation i guess we our marketing team forgot about it uh ramsey solutions.com check it out take advantage of these deals and register for the five thousand dollar giveaway jade it is important and we saw a theme developing throughout the hour

we did um that we identify we all me included have a tendency to treat the symptom rather than the problem absolutely the case yep and uh the problem with the last caller's household was not his wife's income the problem was they're not on a budget and they don't have a plan and he wasn't working extra and yet he wanted her to so there's all kinds of other issues going on there that had nothing to do with her he probably just didn't like her acrylic art thing well it's easier to focus on the problem with the truck is not new versus used the the problem is just whether or not we can afford it right so you got to go hardcore and go okay what is the root what is down below the soil

that's causing this discussion i'm not in agreement with my wife about the rv and so you know asking a question should i lie to her and pay it off no i would never tell you to lie to your wife under any circumstances um you know i can't uh no no you don't you don't you just don't do i mean that's not a what that means is if i'm feeling that pressure, it means there's something else going on. So always look for folks, and I have to look for this in the mirror is, okay, what's the problem? The symptom is I got fat from eating too many donuts, but what's the problem?

I discovered that during high stress scenarios, when I work 16 hours a day, that I try to out eat my stress. Right. I'm a stress eater when I work 16 hours a day that I try to out eat my stress. Right. I'm a stress eater. I discovered that. So I had to discover the real problem. Oh, OK. I can't eat every donut in sight just because I'm stressed out, just because I'm trying

to figure out a way to keep a company open in the middle of COVID. Right. And so I can't do that. It's not it's it's counterproductive. I'm going to get fat and die of a heart attack with a donut stuck in my heart arteries, right? And they'll open me up and go, he died of, he needed a donut ectomy and he didn't get one.

So, I mean, what's the real problem and what's the real symptom? The donuts weren't the problem. They were the symptom. Absolutely. The fat was not the problem. It was the symptom. Well, each of those required an internal realization.

They're trying to focus on the external thing. It's the car or it was the symptom. Well, each of those required an internal realization. They're trying to focus on the external thing. It's the car or it's the RV. It's the budget. But each of those required them looking at something internally and going, you know what? The issue is I'm afraid to talk to my wife about sticking to the budget. I have penny pinched my whole entire life and I have a scarcity mentality. And now is my chance. I don't have to have that anymore.

That's internal. And even with this last caller, all of this requires you to look inward and find out what's at the core root. It's almost always internal, David. It's rarely external with this stuff. You know, it's one of the reasons that we've been so successful over 30 years at Ramsey, helping people, guiding them as they transform their lives. It's because we recognized, unlike most people in the financial business, not everybody, but most of us, I grew up in the financial business, academically trained, and most of us

were taught if we fix the math, it'll be okay. And it's not a math problem. It's a person in the mirror problem. Personal finances, 80% behavior. It's only 20% head knowledge. And so you can't just fix the math until you fix the cause of the math, which usually has something to do with the person in my mirror. Michael Jackson said it. I'm starting with the man in the mirror. I'm asking him to change his ways.

Don't make me keep going dave because i just keep going i'm you could probably just break out in song and it would be the first time it's ever happened on this show they'd get the hook they'd hook me out of here no no not you we've heard you sing you sing well so yeah but you're exactly right that's that's the thing it is the man in the mirror and uh the lady in the mirror it's you know no one duct taped me to the bed and force fed me donuts that's right it didn't happen that was a choice of free will i could check with sharon but i don't think she did she didn't i can promise you not the skinny woman nope not her no she's um she she was no she was not she was not for the donut plan i'm just saying so uh quite the opposite of

feeding them to me but um here just eat another six early that early i want to get rid of you not early i'm taking everything oh yeah so i mean that no that was not her so but no i mean that we can laugh but here's the thing if you're having a situation like this, my teaching for this segment, the thing I'm bringing up, Jade and I are talking about is all of us, and I'm freely admitting my own weaknesses in this area and going, okay, how do I transform? How do I do this? Well, I have to engage in something that causes me to change the problem, and the symptom will fix itself.

That's right. That's right. Self-realization. Yeah, there's something that happens. And my dad used to say it all the time. He would say, you know, go clean up the garage. And I would go, are you going to help? And he'd go, no, I thought of it.

That's half the answer. And so, you know, I've done half the work now because I thought of it. So that realization is half of the work. Oh, yeah. They say they say that all the time. Half the hardest part of the problem solving is realizing that you had a problem to begin with. And once you can take full ownership over that, and I mean full ownership, because a

lot of times you can say you have a problem, but you can start blaming others. I know when Sam and I were getting out of debt, Dave, and I know I'm pivoting here. When Sam and I were getting out of debt, we knew we had a problem but we were still blaming other people yeah we're blaming the you know what everybody but parakeet guy the first call was blaming the spouse he sure was this whole hour yeah yeah they sure were i mean he didn't blame the birds he didn't blame the birds he blamed himself nobody else but i mean she blamed him for the pickup he blamed her for the rv he blamed her for not wanting to take the extra job. It's always somebody else.

I didn't catch that pattern. That's a good catch. Yeah. As long as you, look, Dave, I've heard this. My pastor used to say this all the time. You cannot blame your way to a better life. It's impossible. I don't preach.

As long as you're blaming others, you will not do what it takes for you to succeed because you're going to be waiting around for someone else to do it for you, sounds a lot like the culture right now kind of like victim thinking uh-huh victim mentality it's this idea of arrogance like someone else did this to me well yeah i'm sure it's dunkin donuts and krispy kreme's fault the marketing's they made those dadgum donuts delicious it's all their fault and not they're not nutritious and they didn't put the calories on the label big enough oh no warning from the surgeon donut general it has nothing to do with you getting in your car and turning the key in and spending your money and putting them in your in your gullet my gullet gullet gullet comes out on the first hour with jay that and

well there we go all right this is this is legendary right here legendary radio hey seriously folks that's the whole thing so um yeah it's it's a painful thing i was whining after filing bankruptcy with one of my good friends and you know they're a good friend because i'll tell you the truth and he goes you know you've been whining for about a year blaming the IRS and blaming the banks and blaming everybody else at what point are you gonna look in the mirror and go you signed up for this trip I went well yeah I like you go jump in the creek I said the same thing to Sam yeah he wanted to blame the you know our student loans we had 280,000 in student loans and it's real easy to say well well, you know, we were 18. It was a student

loan company. It was our parents. They never should have let us sign that loan. And you know what? That could be true. That could be true. But you may never get the apology, Dave. You may never get the restitution. You may never get that person coming up to you and saying, hey, I could have done better. Here's a check for $200,000. Yeah, or here's a check. At some point, you've got to take responsibility for that. And you can have the right reason all day why this was a bad deal or why this shouldn't have happened. But after a while, those reasons start turning into excuses. And it becomes up to you to do something different.

Ladies and gentlemen, you see why Jade Warshaw is now on the team. Woo, baby. That'll preach. Good hour. Good job. Good job. Good stuff. Well done, Austin, Ben, James, Zach, Andrew in the booth. The booth dudes making the show happen.

Jade Warshaw's first full hour. It was legendary. Well done. This is The Ramsey Show. Dave here. You can find all of our shows with the Ramsey Network app on your smartphone. It's the only place to listen to the entire back catalog of episodes. Download the Ramsey Network app in your favorite app store today.