The Ramsey Show - App - You Can’t Live Your Dreams if You Don’t Prepare for Them (Hour 3)

Episode Date: October 20, 2023

🎵 Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, it's The Ramsey Show, where we help people build wealth, do work they love, and create actual amazing relationships. I am your host today, Jade Warshaw. I am joined by one of my favorite guys. Wow. I mean, George Camel, what a stand-up individual you are. That's so kind. And we're taking your calls all afternoon about your life, your money. Give us a call.

The number is 888-825-5225, and we'll try to get you on the line. In the meantime, let's quickly go to these phone lines because we've got Linda waiting in White Plains, New York. What's going on, Linda? Hi. thank you so much for taking my call. Happy to do so. What's going on? So my parents are retired and they're in the process of getting divorced. My mom is going to be keeping the house, but she won't have very much to live on. So my siblings and I are thinking of taking on the mortgage. And my question is, does it make sense for us to take on the mortgage for this house that's older and it needs significant renovations? Or should we try to sell and find

my mom a new place to live? I'm going for option number two because it's way cleaner. I'm just like when you started talking about that, my brain started imagining all the ways that can go south because how many siblings is it? There's three of us will be able to take on that responsibility. So let's just pretend you guys split the mortgage equally. And then suddenly one sibling falls on hard times or something happens in their world and they're not able to hold up their end of the bargain. And so now it falls on two siblings. And then, God forbid, something happens and another sibling goes through something with their life and their family and they realize, hey, this is not a priority.

Do you see how that can kind of unravel very quickly? Yeah, definitely. What we've been thinking, though, is even if we try to buy something new, we'll still all have to pitch in. So it's kind of... What is her retirement income? Yeah. It's not much.

So with Social Security, my mom will have about 2,800. That's something. It's just her. And yeah, she can't afford an apartment. Sorry? She can't afford a condo or an apartment. Not in New York. Does she have to live in, do all the siblings live in the White Plains area?

Yeah, we pretty much all live in the same area. We consider relocating, but like for the entire family to relocate, that would be significant. Is there any spousal support? What's going to happen? How's the dust going to settle from this divorce as far as the finances go? Yeah, so pretty much splitting my dad's pension in half, but he has more Social Security because he was the one working, so he'll be able to live on what he gets, but my mom won't quite be able to make ends meet. So she'll have the $2,800 plus half of his pension?

No, that's including. That includes the pension, okay. So if you were to sell the house, what would it bring? In the condition it is now, maybe $100,000, $150,000. It would only go for $150,000? Because it needs a lot of renovations. Then I think we need to get her out of there anyways. What's going to happen when you take on a big mortgage

and you have to pay for all these renovations and none of you even live there? Yeah, well, you know, we're all in our 30s. We've all been saving for our own homes. So what we're thinking is we'll just keep renting and use those. So you're going to delay the rest of your financial future to keep mom living this dream slash nightmare. I would sell it and I'd get her a real, you know, real just quaint little condo and apartment.

And if that can get her mortgage lower to where she can still afford it, then that's great. But I would not refinance this thing and you guys take on the loan, but her name's on the title. It's going to implode the family sooner rather than later. What's your net worth? My net worth is about, probably about $150,000. Yeah. And if you had to guess your siblings, where are they sitting at? If you had to guess.

Oh, somewhat less than that. I don't know what their net worth is but they make about 60 000 a year and they probably have they probably have that average debt that sort of thing i'd rather mom go live with one of the siblings at this point oh you're all debt free could she live with one of y'all um yeah yeah that's definitely possible it's it's just hard for us to think of, you know, our mom having to move back into an apartment. She loves being outdoors.

She loves gardening. She has two big dogs. She can still go outside. And she can still, like, there's so much that she can still do. I think you guys have to grieve what's taken place and grieve the fact that you guys all had this ideal picture of what your mom would be doing at this age and what that would look like and that it's not like that everything kind of just say she doesn't get to have her dreams when she did nothing to prepare for those dreams

that's a hard thing to say out loud because i'm sure she's a wonderful person an amazing mother but she's sitting here with a mortgage, no retirement, and hoping to live off of Social Security. And so we have to also face reality. As John Deloney would say, one of his daily decisions we have to make is choose reality. And the reality is she can't afford the life that she wants. And you guys are going to prop it up while setting back your own financial futures, which is only going to build resentment. It only takes one of these Jenga blocks to fall. One of the siblings to go, this sucks, sucks i'm out to where everyone hates each other

yeah i think here i liked george i liked george's idea of possibly her living with you guys for a while here's what i'm thinking and you can poke holes in this if you sell this house um and you get 150 out of it i I'm get, now when I asked you, what would it bring? I wanted to know, like, what would you profit from it? Not what, so 150 is what you would profit from it. If I were you guys, I'd set that money aside and let it grow for her. And if you guys can work out a situation where it's like mom is living with sibling one for a while, and then she's living with sibling two. And maybe over time, you guys are able to figure out a situation where she's like mom is living with sibling one for a while and then she's living with sibling two and maybe over time you guys are able to figure out a situation where she gets a little apartment because she can draw some money off of her nest egg and then she's got the 2800 coming in

and then she's kind of sustainable on her own but I would rather you guys work out a situation on the front end that doesn't involve you guys each ponying up a bunch of cash, you know, and this long-term thing of we're paying her rent or we're paying her mortgage. I just think that that's going to drain all of you. Yeah. Yeah. That, that, that sounds good. I mean, there will definitely, we will still have to contribute to her because again, with that income that she'll have she won't be able to rent but like on her own um so yeah that's definitely i would also do some homework

and see what all of the options are i know white plains is expensive but i would be shocked if there wasn't a one bedroom for two thousand dollars twenty three hundred dollars and maybe you chip in to help cover some of her groceries. But we don't know how long we're going to have to prop her lifestyle up for. I know, that's right. Or maybe, you know, maybe there's a friend or somebody else where she can get a roommate situation and they have a Golden Girls deal going on

and they're just, you know, they find a way. You know, they've got a companion, they're having fun and they're living in their apartment life together. Either way, the vision that they had for their mom is going to have to change. And that's tough. I hate to have to tell them that, but. Yeah, option A and B aren't great. Let's look at C, D, E, F, and then make a decision as a family. And I bet the further out they go, there's going to be something cheaper. They've just got to look for it. This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you for listening to The Ramsey Show. I'm Jade Warshaw, joined by George Camel, fellow Ramsey personality. And if you're a new listener to our show, number one,

thank you for being here. We're excited that you're here. And number two, you might hear us talk about things that you're not quite sure about. We're excited that you're here. And number two, you might hear us talk about things that you're not quite sure about. We talk about a series of baby steps. We talk about something called FPU, Financial Peace University. You might hear us mention the word every dollar and you're like, what the heck is that?

A budgeting app. And you want to know more information. Well, we've got just the thing for you. We want you to head over to ramsaysolutions.com and we want you to click on the get started button. That's going to help you find your best next step here with Ramsey. It's going to help you get plugged in to what's going to be the next step for you. And that's what we want you to do. So ramsaysolutions.com and click the get started button. Today's question of the day is

sponsored by Neighborly, your hub for home services. Neighborly has top quality providers like Precision Door Service, Junk King, and more to help you take care of projects before the weather gets too cold. So find the local help you need by downloading the Neighborly app today. Today's question comes from Nick in Georgia. My wife and I bought a car new last year for $34,000. Since having a new baby and her becoming a stay-at-home mom, we were thinking of selling that car for what we owe on it, $27,000, and purchasing a used car with 60 or 70,000 miles for around $12,000. The other plan is to attack the debt with intensity and pay it off in six to eight months. I'm just thinking it sounds better to save the $15,000 in cash.

This is our only debt besides our mortgage, and I wanted to get your thoughts on trading the newer car with the warranty, the Kia, for a Nissan Versa or other small car. Monthly payment is $650 before extra payments, and we make roughly $140,000 a year with a bonus. Ah-ha-ha. Love questions like these, George. Fun times.

Yeah, it feels like one of these like riddles you had in school back in the day. Like Stacy has four apples. Yes. Oh man, Nick. Okay, if I'm in your shoes, I make 140K. I've got 27,000 to pay off. This car is not too much for your world.

Sometimes we go, hey dude, sell the car. You make 50 grand and this car is 34 grand. Yeah. So we're not gonna yell at you for the car's value. I'll yell at you for taking out a loan in the first place. But make 140K. You can pay it off in six months. I'd probably go that route versus trying to do the hoopla of I'm going to sell this.

You have $0. So you still need the 12K to get the other car. So that's the that's the scenario here yeah normally i'm in favor of downgrading in car but it's not a necessary piece of the equation i'm with you on that what's really getting me yes it hurts my heart oh that car needs to make like a tree and leave it's really expensive expensive. $650 a month hurts my heart. I don't know how much money they have in the bank. If they had the money in the bank right now

to be done with the debt and get that car. You want to know what? Consider it. There's part of me that thinks that they might have some money in the bank. Because with all the details, sometimes we get questions of the day, there's like no details.

And I'm like, what is wrong? This guy has every detail. So he sounds like a planner and like a little bit nerdy like maybe a spend like a yeah knows where every dollar goes so if they have some money sitting aside people making 140k generally have a little bit of money sitting aside now some are living paycheck to paycheck but a lot of times they're just doing 14 things at once yeah so I'm guessing I'm guessing they could pay this thing off even faster and so I like the hey if we could pay this off in four months instead of six or eight let's do it let's go

hard at this thing uh then I'm okay with you keeping it but there's no hard line I'm gonna draw here and go you gotta sell it yeah uh because you know smaller car new baby I don't know I feel like you're just gonna then turn around and go, the car wasn't big enough. No, they can have this paid off in a year. So it's, yeah, no biggie there. I like it. Good advice, George. What do you say we pick up Sal's call in Sioux Falls, South Dakota? What's going on, Sal? Hey, guys. How are you?

Doing good. How are you? I'm a little nervous, but here we go you got this you can do it oh thank you uh so i read the total money makeover and i got a very impulsive and i basically empty our savings to wipe out uh our cars uh my student loans and a huge chunk to the mortgage. Okay. How much money was that? Man, it was like over 40K. Over 40K?

Yeah, the problem is I did all this without telling my wife. Oh. Foul. Ten-year penalty. Yeah, I really hurt her feelings. You told her now. What was her reaction to this? Obviously, she's hurt, but...

She just said she would love to be part of the plan and all this. Like, I'm usually in charge. She's a stay-at-home mom, and I'm in charge of the finances. Run that back. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's hold up. Go ahead. I think there's where the problem lies.

There's this idea in your house that you're in charge of the finances, and I think that's the mindset that led you to think, I read the total money makeover. I got a great idea. I'm going to go into our savings and I'm going to pay the bills. And that's what's gotten you here. And I think that starting instantly, right now you're doing a vocab rehab. And from now on, both of you are managing the money. It's our responsibility to manage our money. Can we agree on that?

Yes. So that was my question. How do I introduce her to you guys in a very loving and patient and kindly way without coming off as a control freak? Like, I realize there's a lot of conviction in me. Now I've been showing her, like, more, like, statements and numbers and what our investments are through my employers, like my 401K and everything.

Good. And I realized that she was not even aware of that, and it broke me. Like, it's like, no, we're a team. Like, there's no, it's not my money. It's our money. It's our resources. We take trips together. We, we invest together. We grow together. Like we're a family. Do you think that she wants to like, has, has anything happened that you feel like there's resistance?

Like she doesn't want to be involved or she doesn't want to know, or do you think it's just been her, her being in the role? the role she thinks she's supposed to be in and you being in the role you think you're supposed to be in? I think it's on me. I think it's my lack of leadership, like showing her things and like we don't do a budget i mean we spend less than what i bring home and i can see that because our savings were growing every month but i i feel like it's on me and uh really um fully knowing how to include her yeah on on the budget or i mean we're not really doing a budget but i I want to start doing that. Well, I'd love to,

if you think that you can get her to watch it with you, I'd love for us to give you Financial Peace University and you guys watch it together. I'd love for you to find an in-person class near you and for both of you guys to go to this class together and make it a date night. Like this is what you go and do. You're participating together. You talk about it afterwards and have every dollar part of that.

So the way our resources are set up, they're set up for you to work together. Every dollar is an app that you download on both of your phones. You both can look at it. Financial peace. It is very, of course you can do it if you're single, but it, I feel like there's, it's great for couples. Like it's got that special piece to it. So if we give that to you, Sal, will you, will you do it together? Oh, absolutely. All right. Absolutely. Okay. So you seem very genuine, Sal. There's genuine remorse here. And I think that is going to go the furthest with her of saying, Hey, listen, I screwed up. I haven't been doing a good job leading this house, being aorse here. And I think that is going to go the furthest with her of saying, hey, listen, I screwed up. I haven't been doing a good job leading this house, being a good husband.

And I want to get us on the same page. And I want to let you know that your vote counts just as much as mine. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm no longer just going to run this ship on my own and then just let you know what I did in hindsight. Because the heart behind it, he went and paid off debt. I know. It's such a great thing the wrong way. Yeah. i literally don't think it was intentionally to be malice

like i think people enter into relationships with like gender role ideas and a lot of guys think hey it's my job or in some families it's the woman who pays the bills and it's like this is you and this is me and this is just the way it's always been. But that changes today. Vocab rehab, guys. Love it. This has been a theme today, George. Sal, hang on the line. We're going to gift you one year of Financial Peace University as well as one year of every dollar premium. Let her have a say in the budget. Let her share her thoughts on how you're going to move forward. And that will get you guys dreaming together and get this marriage back on the right foot. This is The Ramsey Show. Thank you for listening to The Ramsey Show.

I'm your host, Jade Warshaw. Next to me is George Camel, host of the YouTube show, George Camel. The George Camel Show. With a K. Don't wear it out. That's right. And don't get confused about it. We're taking your calls all afternoon about your life and your money. So give us a call. The number is 888-825-5225. And we would love to chop it up with you. And that's what we're going to do with Christian, who's in Chicago, Illinois. What's going on, Christian? Nothing much. How are you guys? Doing great. Wonderful. So here is the scenario. We had our home up on the market since for about three to four months.

It was under contract. We were a week. We were the week of to close. And then the buyer's lender did not approve their loan. So they weren't able to buy the house. So we put it back on the market again, we went under contract and then the buyer backed out. So we were supposed to close on our third contract yesterday. Now the buyer is short $8,000 and we don't know what to do at this point. Um, don't know if to keep waiting. Is there anything that we can negotiate?

It's a roller coaster. We're really just trying to move forward with our lives. Not sure what to do. Well, first of all, we're going to give you advice as entertainment because this is the job of the real estate agent, the closing attorney, the lender. But we can give you our take if that helps. Sure. So they're eight grand short.

What has the communication been? Because the lender and the closing office, they should be looking at their finances at the very last minute going, hey, we still good? We still good? We still good? There hasn't been any financial changes. So they had this money at one point, right? Sorry, ask that question one more time. Did they have the eight grand at one point, or did they never have it,

and they just got pre-approved? Well, yes, but apparently the buyer gave a bank statement that was from August, and they went forward with it, And in the matter of three months, the buyer who has a joint account with their mother, quote, it's my attorney, whose mom spent 8,000. I don't know. It's probably personal, but it definitely did affect everyone in the pipeline. Well, man, if they got to pay to play and if they can't, this deal's over and you're going to have to try for the fourth time, which sucks. Yeah. What has the communication been about when and if they're going to close this deal and have the eight grand? Well, it sounded pretty consistent. It sounded

pretty diligent. I would need in writing that on this date, we will close and you will have the money. That's what we have on file. Everything is ready to go. Tomorrow we're closing. And yesterday came, I got a phone call at five o'clock that we're going to have to reconvene because it really sounds fishy to me because apparently there was a wire transfer coming in from Mexico. Oh, yikes. Christian cover the cost. Christian. I don't like any of this. I mean, you're doing this all by the book, right? You're working with closing attorneys and lenders and real estate agents?

Yes. This isn't some, like, backwoods deal? No, this is a Dave Ramsey realtor that we found a previous attorney that I used to buy the house. Okay. I just wanted to make sure this wasn't some weird situation where you're kind of working around some of that. Christian, what's your timeline? I mean, do you have a contingent offer out on another house,

or do you have some time to, you know, what's your rush, or do you have a rush? Well, at this point, it's getting to a point where this is going to be, like, the fourth, fifth time doing it. I don't know. It's tough. It's tough to say because... But where are you guys going to go? Let's say you close three weeks from now. Where do you guys go? Well, right now, we are staying with my in-law, my mother-in-law, until this all clears out. We don't want to sign a lease until this is,

you know, finalized because we want to restart. I've been listening to Dave Ramsey and I felt like this was the right decision to make. And this is, you know, trying to restart, save up a bunch of cash and get a mortgage that we can, you know, afford sure so the timeline is based off of that but on the flip side we did just find out uh that we have baby number two on the way so congrats so the timeline the timeline is within that uh context you know getting getting an apartment before the baby comes and uh i don't know if i'm gonna have to put the house on the market again, because, you know, logically speaking, it would probably be better to keep it at that point. But well, again, here's the thing. I mean, this deal is not going to happen. It can't hurt you to put

the house on the market and keep it out there. Obviously, we're going into wintertime and my guess is in Chicago, things slow down quite a bit in the winter. Am I right? Yes. Yeah. I mean, I would keep working with that real estate agent. Here's the thing. And you can correct me here. When Sam and I were selling our house, something that was frustrating to me is sometimes the realtor would act like there was a solid offer.

And then Sam and I were like, yes, we've got this offer and then i'm like sam and i were like yes we've got this offer and then the next day it's like oh well they pulled it back and it's like how solid was it to begin with you know what i mean so you might also be dealing with that idea because the realtors they want to sound like they're doing the best job for you and i've got four offers and da da da da and then at the end of the day they pull out and you're like wait how how far along really was it or were you just just trying to make it sound like you sold our house super fast kind of thing? So just, you know. I'm curious what the real estate attorney said.

Have they talked through the options? Like, hey, we can postpone the closing. We could work out a partial payment plan. They pay some of it now and some of it after the fact. We close the deal. What are the options that have been laid out? That's a good question. He did. I spoke to them. I spoke to the attorney within the past couple hours, and he said that the first option, we wait until she scraps it up. He's just telling me a lot of things that he hopes you know he hopes this hopes that which isn't you know isn't convincing enough for me really um um and the second option was to

i forgot what the second option was to be completely honest but it there wasn't a lot i mean has anyone just suggested to push the closing date by you know two weeks or four weeks until this person can get what do whatever they're going to do to get the money? Thank you. That was actually the second option, to push it back two to three weeks. I'm good waiting two to three weeks before putting it back on the market in case the deal does go through and you can be done with this because I know you're just exhausted at this point.

I bet. I would be too. Beyond that, I'd have it in writing. Hey, three weeks from now, if they don't have it, we're moving on. They're going to keep kicking the can down the road. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Go see another week.

We need another week. What do we do with our mortgage then? If the deal falls through and you still have the mortgage? Is that what you're saying? Yeah. Yeah. Well, are you still going to list it again at that point, or are you going to keep the house and just live in it for a while? We'll see, I guess.

I guess we'll see, because right now there's a payoff request, so I don't intend to pay the mortgage until the deal closes. Do you have the money to pay it off now or no? No. This is contingent on the home sale? Yes. Okay. Yeah, Ient on the home sale. Yes. Okay. Yeah, I mean, the request doesn't mean much until you actually pay it off.

So you're all good there. I mean, as long as you're making the payments, you got to keep making that mortgage payment until you figure out what's next. Yeah. And that's all you can do. I mean, you're either going to decide to put it back on the market again if this thing doesn't come through in three weeks or four weeks or whatever you decide is the next close date. Or, you know, you might decide, hey, winter, it's not going to be good.

We're going to wait till spring to relist it again. You know, what percentage of your take home pay is this mortgage right now? Are you guys drowning? Yeah, I don't know how to do the math on that. It's one. I have one hundred and fifty seven,000 left on the loan. I'm bringing home about $3,800 a month. What's the actual mortgage payment?

Yeah. Oh, the actual mortgage payment is $1,200. Okay. Yeah. So it's not crushing you. So if this doesn't work out, if this doesn't work out, this doesn't work out you know in the next four weeks you know i would just really consult with the realtor and say what do you think is best we've been down this road for you know for the last realtor wants to close the deal they want that commission but i know

that's right i'm going let's get this in writing with the attorney and say they got three weeks if it's not in three weeks they lose their earnest money their deposit and we move on with our life yeah but are you going back on the market after that? Or are you holding out till spring? I'm probably holding out because I think they need a breath of air right now. I think so too. They're exhausted. I think so too. Tough stuff. Tough stuff. This is The Ramsey Show. You're listening to The Ramsey Show, our scripture and quote of the day. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. That's Colossians 3.2. Then Frank Zappa says, a mind is like a parachute.

It doesn't work if it's not open. Ooh. Ooh, mic drop. I like that. Okay. I'm Jade Warshaw. This is George Camel. We're taking your calls.

We got a little bit of time left today. So try to get your call in on those phone lines. It's 888-825-5225. And we take your calls live and in person if anybody was want to move out of my mom's house. I want to get an apartment or a house. My mom's very adamant about me, you know, not renting an apartment that's on the first floor. And she says that it would be better for me to just stay in the house and save money for a down payment. And from my point of view, I want to move out as soon as I can. And, um, I'm taking care of my financials so that I can prepare for that. And I was just wondering what your opinion of that is. How old are you? 28. Boy, it's time to get out.

Have you been working? Did you go to college? Have you been working? What have you been doing? Yeah, I've been working at the company I'm at right now for, it's going to be two years on November 1st. Okay. And what was the reason you were staying home in the first place? You know, after you got the job, you had a big boy salary. Was it, hey, I'm trying to pay off debt, or hey, rent's expensive? Right. My mom's a single mother.

It's just me and her here and the rest of the family's back home and so i've kind of been hesitant to leave her see i'm wondering if there's a relational piece of this where she just doesn't want her son to leave because she's like she likes having you around which is a very sweet thought trying to look out for me uh financially too which i'm trying to solve as well What do you mean financially? I've got a couple of debts that I'm trying to pay off. How much? I take home monthly about $4,100. I had a credit card balance of $6,000 and it's down to $375 now. Okay. So that's gone like the next few weeks. You're right.

Yeah. What else? I have a motorcycle loan that's got $10,100 and I'm planning on selling that and just getting rid of it and staying off of it. All right. Will you earn a profit when you sell it or will you be upside down or will it just be even? Probably five to a thousand dollars profit. Okay.

I have a card that we're debating right now is whether or not for me to keep it or not. I bought it brand new when I first got my job. It was, the loan amount was originally 36,000 and it's now down to 23,300. What's it worth? Pelley Blue Book Trade-In. The dealership was offering me $24,000. I've been listing it for anywhere between $20,000 to $30,000. Okay. What else? I have a student loan that's $11,000. Okay. So let's assume the credit card's gone this month, right? And then after

that, you said you're going to sell the motorcycle and probably bring anywhere between $1,000 to $5,000. If you did that, whatever profit that turned would go onto your student loan. And then we've got to decide what's going to happen with this car. Are you looking to quickly pay it off or are you looking to sell it and downsize to something in cash um i was just gonna sell it and i have a car available for me right now it's a toyota that's got 130 000 miles that i used to drive that my mother now drives and she also has the opportunity to go back to her older car that she used to drive. So she's got two cars? Yeah, my mom helped me buy my first car, the Toyota. Okay.

Dude, I'm doing all of this. Because on paper, you're almost debt-free if you do all of this. You pay off the card, we're going to sell the motorcycle, come out of that with $500 to $1,000, sell the car for $30,000, you owe $23,000, you're going to make $6,000 or $7,000 there. So you have $7,000 plus the $1,000 from the motorcycle. Come out of that with $500 to $1,000. Sell the car for $30,000. You owe $23,000. You're going to make $6,000 or $7,000 there. So you have $7,000 plus the $1,000 from the motorcycle. Now we've got $8,000 to throw at $11,000 of student loans, and you're debt-free in the next two months.

Yeah, I love that. And then you can actually move out. So what is your opinion about getting an apartment or staying at home and saving for a down payment? I would get the apartment. Get the apartment, dude. You've already stunted your growth long enough. Even if you have to get some roommates. And it's a great way to start out,

like this idea of living by yourself, right? You know, it's like, let's dip our toe into the water before we just dive off the high dive, right? What's her deal with the first floor apartment? Cockroaches. I don't have a problem with it. My mother has a problem with it as far as safety. And, you know, oh, if you're on the first floor, the robber is going to go on the first floor.

I don't buy any of this. Wait, there's some arguments to this. You do have to think about where you're going to live. Are you in a super dangerous part? No, I'm in a good neighborhood. And the apartment that I'm looking at is literally a two-minute walk from her house. So it's a safe neighborhood the only other reason i wouldn't live on the first floor is that's where the bugs come in is that are you are you that person second floor is the best floor you don't

want to if you go too high up no one's going to help you move getting your couch up there's going to be a pain in the butt you are hilarious thank you will rudder will rudder in the booth knows what i'm talking about but if you go on the floor, if there's any pest issues on that property, they're going right under the door into your apartment. I think we're done letting mommy make the decisions for us. That's the heart of all of this. Yeah, that's right. That's right.

So I just think we got to go, mom, I appreciate everything you've done for me. You've been amazing. I got to step out on my own. I've been making bad decisions while living at home, taking on all kinds of debt. I think using my own money my own income not having this Safety net this hammock i've been laying in is going to cause me to make better financial decisions And therefore I will come visit you on the weekends. We'll have family dinner. Love you. So let's sayonara let's let's talk on both sides of this for the coin for a second george, so

I've been reading and there's a lot of arguments out there why, you know, if you're coming out of college or you're, you know, in your early 20s, it could be beneficial for you to live at home for a couple of years while you're getting your financial footing or whatnot. This is what some of the articles are saying. But there's part of you is like, yeah, you could do that if you have a great relationship with your family. Like I know a couple of people who can actually live at home with their parents and no one blows up. I couldn't do it. But hey, and there's like, yeah, you know, if you have that type of relationship for a year or so, that could work. But then there's part of it. I'm looking at my guys numbers here and there's part of it that's like I live at home. I don't have any expenses. i can buy motorcycles and cars exactly

and dilly dally with my student loan this idea that i'll save up a down payment like or just get comfortable and eating mom's spaghetti slowly there we go is that an m&m reference i mean i had to knowing you i just thought it was yeah you know but there is part of that where it's comfort can really hold you back. A hundred percent. From doing what you know that you need to do. And I'm not dogging on Bryle. I'm having a little bit of fun.

But I truly think that when you step out on your own with your own income, your own bills, and your parents, they did a great job raising you. Yes. But you're an adult now. We have to have our own life, make our own decisions. And it's great to ask mom for advice when we need it. Yeah. But her dictate hey here's what you're gonna do next at 28 i'm out on that yeah it's not good and yeah even if you get a second floor apartment which is i just have never heard this i'm 34 years old i've never heard that you should not get a first floor apartment i want

anybody watching this on youtube to put in the comments if it matters what floor you're on and put it matters because of your neighbors like you know people stomping above you like what's going on up there that's true but when yeah you got to think about these things you don't want a bunch of people above you yeah but the idea that robberies don't happen on second floor apartments i call bs on that too yeah that's true and it sounds like they live in a safe neighborhood but the point here is there can be some benefit if you have just i think my rule of thumb is like a year when you graduate college you have a year to go home have an exit strategy and then you gotta have an exit and if life happens you have some extenuating

life life circumstance it's okay to have that safety net hey i gotta be home for six months for a year get my life back together. But this is a different situation. I moved out when I was 20 and moved across the country and I love my parents and I visit home, but I just had to, it felt good. I felt like it propelled me into adulthood in a different way than if I had lived at home until I was 28 or 30.

Yeah, I moved out and I moved into an apartment that some girls i went to school with and there was no room i just slept on the couch and i lived there and you survived i survived was it a first floor um no i don't think it was first floor i don't really remember and it must be nice i was sleeping on a couch you know i think i was paying like a couple of hundred dollars and then i got married and Sam and I moved in together. It worked out. It worked out. Hey, that's what we're here for. That is what we're here for. This has been the Ramsey Show. Thanks for hanging out with us. That does it for this hour. When it comes to your life and your money, you can tell me that you won't do it,

but don't tell me that you can't. This is the Ramsey Show. Hey, George Campbell here. If you love the show and you want a deeper dive on your money journey, we've got a weekly newsletter that gives you helpful articles and tips on following the Ramsey way. Just go to RamseySolutions.com today to sign up for the newsletter. Again, that's RamseySolutions.com to sign up for our weekly newsletter.