The Ramsey Show - App - You Can’t Win With Money When Your Relationships Are Messy
Episode Date: December 26, 2025🤔 ...Think you’re good with money? Take our Money in America quiz! While we are out for Christmas break, we've compiled some of our favorite Rachel and Jade calls from the past two years. We'll be back with a live show in the new year! Merry Christmas! Rachel Cruze & Jade Warshaw answer your questions and discuss: I'm in $147,000 of debt, should I sell my business to clear it? We live paycheck-to-paycheck and can't get ahead I co-signed for a truck with my ex-fiancee. Why should I have a 15-year mortgage? My mom keeps asking me for money. My fiancée is concerned about the terms in our prenup How can I not feel guilty in BS7? Next Steps: ✔️ Help us make the show better. Please take this short survey. 📞 Have a question for the show? Call 888-825-5225 weekdays from 2–5 p.m. ET or send us an email 💵 Start your free budget today by downloading the EveryDollar app 🏠 Find a Ramsey Trusted Real Estate Agent 📘 Preorder What No One Tells You About Money today now and get $100+ in bonus items Connect With Our Sponsors: Stop paying more and start shopping smarter at ALDI. Amazon is making it easier than ever to find top gifts at amazing prices this season in the Holiday Shop. Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp. Go to Boost Mobile to switch today! Go to Casper Sleep and use promo code RAMSEY to learn more. Learn more about Christian Healthcare Ministries. Get started today with Churchill Mortgage. Get 20% off when you join DeleteMe. Go to FAIRWINDS Credit Union for an exclusive account bundle! Debt collectors hassling you? Take back control of your life at Guardian Litigation Group Find top health insurance plans at Health Trust Financial. Use code RAMSEY to save 20% at Mama Bear Legal Forms. Visit NetSuite today to learn more. For more information, go to SimpliSafe. Get started with YRefy or call 844-2-RAMSEY. Visit Zander Insurance for your free instant quote today! Explore more from Ramsey Network: 💸 The Ramsey Show Highlights 🧠 The Dr. John Delony Show 🍸 Smart Money Happy Hour 💡 The Rachel Cruze Show 💰 George Kamel 🪑 Front Row Seat with Ken Coleman 📈 EntreLeadership Ramsey Solutions Privacy Policy
Transcript
Discussion (0)
This episode is filled with some of our best calls and advice, but unless you take what you hear
and put it to work in your own life, you'll be stuck with the same money stress in 2026. So make a
change and download every dollar today.
Normal is broke and common sense is weird. So we're here to help you,
transform your life from the Ramsey Network in the Fairwinds Credit Union Studio. This is The Ramsey Show.
And I'm Rachel Cruz hosting this hour with Jade Warshaw. And we're answering your question.
So give us a call at AAA-8-2-5-2-25. And we'll be talking about your life, your money, career relationships,
anything and everything, we are here for you. So let's start off in Boston with Miguel.
Hi. Welcome to the show.
Hey, how's it going?
We're doing well.
How can we help today?
So today I wanted to ask, so I have a business and I'm contemplating on what I should be next
because I'm also $147,000 in debt, and that's including credit cards, student loans, and a car payment.
Okay.
So I want to know if I should sell a business for what I think I'd give value for and then start
fresh and use that lump sum of money to attack like the debt.
Mm, what kind of business are you in?
It's a printing business, so merchandise.
What would cause you to sell the business versus using profit from the business to pay down the debt?
I think it's just because I'll collect a lumps of money and like the business right now is kind of, you know, fluctuating.
It's up and down.
And I'm also a loan in it.
So it's a lot of my time.
where I feel like if I could change the...
If you didn't have debt, Miguel, would you stay in this business?
Or would you still want out?
Yeah.
You would stay in.
Yeah, I'll potentially stay in the business.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, because I look at this as...
I mean, because how much would you sell it for?
How much could you get out of it?
Minus all of your liabilities and everything.
About 30 grand.
How much are you making off of it every year?
How much are you bringing home?
So this is actually like my first year in it.
So I'd know at the end of the year, but roughly after everything, about $1,500 a month.
$1,500 a month.
Is this what you do full-time or is this kind of like a side business?
It's full-time.
Well, I don't know that I would sell it, but I would not have this being my full-time job right now because of what it's generating.
It feels like it's...
How are you guys living? Is your wife work?
No, I'm single.
You're single. How are you living off of $1,500 a month?
Just making it happen, honestly.
But what's your rent, though? Like, real numbers?
I paid a studio. It's about $8.50.
What else? Car, yeah, $450, and then...
$4.50, okay.
Yeah.
And then utility.
I guess that's put in with the rent
and then just you're scrapping on food
no insurance
Yeah
Do you have insurance
Health insurance?
My cards
No no no no no health insurance
Yeah so you're not on a living wage right now
And so
While I think it's cool to have a printing business
It eats like a part-time side hustle
When we look at the income that it's bringing
So I would be looking
as you're working this, I'd be looking for a full-time job.
What are your skills?
What have you done in the past before you did this business?
I technically just hopped off school and then save money and then started this business.
Yeah. How many hours a week?
I've never really.
How many hours a week are you putting into this?
A lot. It's probably like 50, 60.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay. So if you did, do you have a budget?
you're out there like when you say sell the business i mean what's that have you have you looked into
that option is there a realistic option yeah i have yeah i have a few options and that's when i
mean the business i just mean like the equipment and everything yeah um oh i hear what you're saying
not necessarily yeah okay yes because that's where the debt is right what did you invest in to do
this business like what equipment do you have oh i have all like dc printer he presses
and a couple other machines
on desktops and stuff like that
I'll tell you
you haven't been doing the business long
so I don't want to say that there's no future in it
but how much of this debt is business debt
like how much of it came from the business
I'm about eight grand
okay that's not bad of the 147
that's only eight I'm inclined for you to continue
you, what I want to know is what's the minimal amount of hours that you can put in it to keep
the $1,500 so that you can search for something else? Is there any feasible way to do that?
Yeah, it's possible. That's also another plan I've been thinking of, because I have a location
in a premier like downtown area. So I was thinking of just getting rid of the space,
I'm trying to find something smaller. And then kind of just work on base of orders I get.
I'm not so much like being in there.
Do you have consistent clients that you're reprinting for?
Or is it a one and done?
A little bit of both, but I do have, I've picked up a few clients that are picking up, you know,
a month.
Yeah.
And is most of the hours, when you're saying I'm working 50 hours on this,
is it most of it in the actual physical printing that you're having to do,
or is it trying to find new clients and marketing and thinking of creative ways to get your name out there?
a little bit of both but mainly the printing process like printing and being in there
okay yeah so I'm with jade I mean Miguel if you have all the equipment and it is bringing in
1500 obviously that's not that's not sustainable long term for you to live like that obviously
you know that or you probably wouldn't be calling the show so it's November a part of me would
give it another six months while doing something else like you need to go wait tables I mean
you could make more money doing that I mean something right you need to go
be doing something, and if you can keep this on the side and actually get some clients,
you could, I don't know, and if you could, yes, grow it, and then maybe that be your full time,
or you just have these clients and you start making $3,000 a month while also still working
to get out of all the credit, all the debt that you talked about at the beginning of this call.
So I almost would be tempted just to hold tight for like maybe six months.
Give yourself a time period, though, to say, okay, don't go into any more debt in it.
But to say, can I pick up any more steam in this business in the next six to nine months?
And if you can't, then sure, sell the equipment and then that will give you some money.
But we just see this, Jade and I both, I think, as a great side hustle for right now,
while you go get a full-time job somewhere else?
The fact that you've started generating money so quickly from it, I think is good.
And you have made an investment in some equipment, and it feels like worth it to try to play that out a little longer.
But I like what Rachel said on putting a timeline on it.
I would do that, Miguel, or just throwing this out there,
kind of the other side of the coin is if you hate it and you're not enjoying it,
but I think you are liking it in some degree because you said you'd still stay in if you didn't have debt,
is to, yeah, find something just full time, sell the stuff and you start a whole new life
where you're not feeling like you have to carry a business, right?
Because it does, it's a lot of strain and mental calories to do that.
So, I don't know, kind of two different options, but either way, you've got to get a second job.
Either way.
Agree, agree.
Rich, yeah, I hope that helps.
I know that sometimes when we just tell people,
cut your expenses and get a job, I know, it feels tough.
But truly, that is the remedy.
You don't have expenses to cut your bare bones as it is.
So the next line of defense is getting more income.
That's how it works.
Yeah.
And Ken Coleman has a book.
Find the work you're wired to do.
And we'll send that to you because there's a great,
it's on a quiz, assessment at the back.
Yeah, to kind of figure out.
Maybe this will help kind of narrow.
some possible career paths for you too, Miguel,
that you can just kind of brainstorm and think.
So holding the line, Christian's going to pick up.
We all want peace, peace with our money, our homes, our schedules,
but having peace online is important too.
Most of the time when you sign up for a coupon,
enter a giveaway, or click yes,
to another email list, your personal info, like your name, your phone number, your address
gets collected and sold by data brokers. And before you know it, your inbox is overflowing,
your phones full of spam calls, and your data's floating around who knows where. That is why I
love what Delete Me does. Their team of privacy experts finds your personal info on those
creepy data broker sites, gets it removed, and keeps it off. It is simple, it's safe,
and it gives you more peace of mind.
That means fewer spam calls, fewer scams, and way less digital chaos.
You have worked so hard to find peace with your money.
Now it's time to find peace with your digital life.
Start protecting your privacy and your peace today.
Go to join deleteme.com slash Ramsey for 20% off an annual plan.
That's joindeletme.com slash Ramsey.
With the last caller where you're talking about real estate and what that looks like to start saving up towards a home.
And you guys, when it comes to buying and selling your home, there's a lot of decisions.
It can feel very overwhelming, but you don't have to go through that process alone.
We created Ramsey's real estate home base.
So this is a place with so many resources and tools like calculators, start to finish guides,
how to articles, a podcast, a book, a video course, like everything around the subject of real estate.
Because again, buying and selling, it can just, it can be an overwhelming process.
And the more information you have that you understand and you know, the more clarity you're going to have walking into that, which is huge.
Like you want to be armed with so much information before you go and buy or sell your home.
So make sure to check it out at Ramsey Solutions.
dot com slash real estate or click the link in the description if you're watching on YouTube or
listening on podcast because if you need some next steps towards your home buying or home selling
process, make sure check it out. One of my favorite things on it is the dashboard. They have
the U.S. housing market trends and they keep it updated and it's just constantly kind of a pulse of
what's going on with interest rates, median house home prices in America, total days on the
markets, how many homes are for sale around the country. I mean, it just kind of gives you the
snapshot picture of the real estate market.
So again, you can go to ramsysolutions.com
slash real estates.
All right, we're going to the phones
and we're going to Andrew in Cheyenne, Wyoming,
one of my favorite country songs.
Hey, Andrew, welcome to the show.
Hey, thanks for having me.
Absolutely.
How can we help?
Hey, so my wife and I were on baby step too,
and it kind of took us a little bit to get there,
mostly because we've been pretty sick both of us for the past few years and we're seeking
some medical treatment to hopefully knit this in the bud hopefully in a few short months
but the medical treatment that we're looking at that was recommended by our doctor is
experimental and it's not covered by insurance and the treatment is going to be between
$10,000 to $30,000 so we're kind of in a position where we do
No, no, Andrew. Are you there, Andrew? Oh, no. Oh, man. Andrew, we'll give you one more second. Oh,
yeah, that's a bad line, I think. Um, we're going. Oh, there you are. Oh, you're back. Yes.
Sorry. Oh, you're good. You're good. My phone's a little weird. Um, so, um, yes, I don't know if my wife and I should actually, um, take out
alone or not. We really don't want to, um, especially since we're, we've been getting out of
and share as much as as you feel comfortable, but what's, what's going to?
on health-wise?
We were, so we got pretty sick from the home that we were living in.
Oh.
And so.
Like mold?
It's been, yeah, so it's just been a lot of stuff that's been going on where a lot
of the treatments have been not either FDA-approved or treatments that have been getting
us better.
We are better, but it's just been a really long process.
So the last time we talked with our.
doctor he said that we should try and do like a hyperbaric treatment which seems great you know
he's had really great success with it but the only problem is that the payment has to be up front
and so that's that's the only issue and insurance this is obviously something more like in a natural
bent I'm assuming so insurance isn't going to cover it no insurance won't cover it tell me um just health
wise are you guys are you able to work are you able to function like how are you guys you said you're doing
better. I'm just trying to get a gauge about how urgent this is for you guys. Yeah. So,
so we are better and we are both working right now. We make about, I want to say, close to
$70,000 or $80,000 right now a year. Okay. The only problem with this is that the longer we put
it off, the worst it'll get. Sure. And so it just... What's your margin every month? Like,
what are you right now putting towards dead and baby step two that you could
put potentially towards saving up for this or doing one at a time?
Yeah, we're able to put close to $600 or so a month into debt.
And how much debt do you guys have?
Right now we have about, I want to say about $20,000 in student loan debt and then
about $50,000 in a business loan.
Okay.
Um, man, this is so hard because I do feel like they're just from my own experience, not my own
experience, but people within my close circles of friends and family, even that I know, you know,
when you get something, it's like autoimmune or mold or whatever that it can end up feeling,
Andrew, like there's always something else we have to, like there's a long line of things that
are continual. And so what I, you know, always just think about and kind of caution is, I
would number one, maybe get a second opinion.
I'm sure you know your doctor well and trust them.
But, you know, I mean, we're talking about $10,000 to $30,000, right?
I mean, if it was $2,000, that's one thing.
But, I mean, you're talking, you know, five figures going in with treatments.
And so is that a piece or all in?
That would be for us combined.
And is this ongoing or is it kind of a one-time?
Lord willing, it'd be just a one-time, like, you know,
one one to two months worth of treatment so it'd be 20 sessions is like is about $1,000 on the
high end so we hope to be done in about a month okay so you know what what I would probably do
because again I feel like this can sometimes feel like a never ending yeah cycle um I would I would
um and because it's not a and I know you're you guys are saying I don't want to downplay at all
the sickness I'm sure it's just miserable but it's not a life or death like okay I have to
save my child right now because you know there's a you know like it's not this it's not an urgency but it is
something for the betterment of your health you want so what you know what I would probably strive to do
is whatever I could to get because 10 to 30 is a big range so I would get as close to that 10 and I would
talk negotiate doctor's bill I mean I would do whatever I could to get it down to that 10 and you guys
are you know I would work to save a thousand a month I would be okay right now because it is a health
issue maybe to pause the debt snowball stay current on your bills but I would buy
that's 600 a month, up to a thousand, and say for 10 months, and then starting October,
November, Andrews, start this treatment. And then hopefully by this time next year, you're through
it, you're done and then press play on the baby steps. And maybe one of you goes out of time to
see if it's helpful. Oh, that's a good point. Yeah. I know you're two different bodies with two
different sets of, you know, but that might be a good way to say, listen, I did it. It did nothing
for me or I did it. And it really, really helped. That might give you some confidence going into the
next treatment. It's just a thought. Like, I don't know what you're facing. I don't know if it's
headaches or every time you eat, you know, whatever it is, if it's something that's truly
debilitating, but if it's just, and again, I'm not, I don't want to downplay it either,
but if it's something that's more of an annoyance that you're learning to live through,
that gives you, you know, there's a little bit more timeline there to get this done.
For sure. And the sense, too, that, you know, you don't want to prolong it too long because
of what you're saying, you know, they can come back and get worse unless you have this treatment.
So getting to it, right, a level of urgency, but it's also not.
like we have to do this next month.
The only option is alone and we're done.
Like if you can and it's not debilitating
because you guys are working and all of that,
yeah, I would find something
because I would cash flowed.
And the other thing, Andrew, that's interesting
is when you are working with cash,
even when we're talking about, you know, health situations,
it does force you.
This is why I like cash,
forces you to look at other options,
other decisions.
Like, sell something.
There's just other parts of your brain
of problem solving versus with debt.
It's like, here's a chunk of money.
this is all we're going to do we don't really have to pit the brain power to think through other things
it's just here but when you're paying with cash and you're working and saving hard like I don't know
it just it forces other things to come to the surface of other options and choices that's also
but yeah so again I'm so sorry that is that's that stuff that is like and that has been I don't
know I don't know if you've I've just had people and it's like you go to the next thing and then it
flares up again it just feels like it's like whackamol a little bit sometimes with different things
so I do want you guys to get that treatment.
But because it's not, it's not life or death, right?
In this moment, I would calm down.
I mean, you know, I would pause a little bit and save up for it.
That's difficult.
I remember when Sam and I were getting out of debt.
This was before the days of Obamacare and you had to have insurance or else you were penalized.
We didn't have insurance.
And one day he was pulling our luggage out of the back of the Jeep and it got caught on his finger and he broke his finger.
Oh, no.
And we didn't have insurance.
And I was like, listen, head over to Walgreens.
Tape it up.
Tape it up.
It's crooked to this day.
And, you know, he plays instruments.
It wasn't good.
Take care of yourselves.
Take care of yourselves.
Is that insurance?
This is The Ramsey Show.
The holidays are supposed to be joyful, but they can also be expensive.
Between gifts, travel, and about 1,000 limited time offers, your budget can start feeling anything but merry.
And that's why I love this.
Boost Mobile helps you treat yourself and your wallet.
Right now, you'll pay just $10 a month for your first two months.
Then, only $25 a month for unlimited talk, text,
and data. Forever. No price hikes, no contracts, no nonsense. Just reliable service that keeps your
phone bill low and your holiday spirits high. So stop stressing over your budget and start saving
instead. Go to boostmobile.com slash Ramsey and unwrap the savings today. That's boostmobile.com
slash Ramsey. Restrictions apply. See boostmobile.com slash Ramsey for details.
Welcome back to The Ramsey Show.
Up next in Boone, North Carolina, we have Sierra on the line.
Hi, Sierra, welcome to the show.
Hi, thank you.
Absolutely.
How can we help?
So my husband and I are living paycheck to paycheck, and I was introduced to Dave Ramsey for my
grandmother. Now, I have been trying for the past six months, and I'm stuck on baby step
one, and we're not getting anywhere. We had half of baby step one, and then everything happened
with the hurricane, and we're back to zero. Oh, man. Were you guys hit hard? Were you one of
the towns? Yeah, we were. So sorry. It's okay.
Okay, it happens.
But I'm just, I feel like we can't catch a break.
And wasn't paycheck to paycheck is so hard for us.
I am a full-time student, college student.
I'm 29, and my husband works full-time, sometimes even over, like, overtime shifts, just
so that we can get by.
And I just, I don't know what to do anymore.
What's he bringing in?
Income-wise.
About 49 to 50,000 a year.
Okay.
And when do you graduate?
I have about five semesters left, so I'll be finishing up in 2027.
Okay.
Wow.
Okay.
Are you working at all, Sierra?
I'm not, but I pick up pet sitting shift to try and bring in some money.
I tried a full-time job and full-time college, and it destroyed me.
Okay.
What are you getting your degree in?
Biology.
And what's the goal with that?
What do you want to do?
I want to go work on the coast as a marine biologist.
Wow.
Okay.
Okay.
So you're, he's bringing in $49,000.
You're doing pet sitting.
How much do you guys see a month?
Like after taxes, after everything.
What does that look like monthly for you?
It's about $3,500.
Okay.
And how are you guys living?
Are you renting?
What are you paying for rent?
We are renting.
Okay.
We pay $1,000 a month for rent.
Okay.
Yeah, this is tough.
The solution that you're looking for, I mean, people live paycheck to paycheck for different reasons.
Sometimes it's our spending's out of control and we've got to, you know, rein the budget in and rain the spending in.
And sometimes it really is an income issue.
And it's, in this case, I think you're creeping up on an income issue.
I'm just wondering what is your husband doing for work?
kind of work does he do um he makes fiber optic cable okay and and you said he had a side hustle
too what's that um he door dashes okay so i'm wondering i'm wondering if both of you need to sit down
and kind of figure out okay what do we both need to do in order to make this work because to
your own words it's not sustainable are you guys going into debt like how are you covering the
overages? We are door-dashing every chance that we can get. Okay. Just so, like, I can get to class
and we can get food. And sometimes his mom helps us out. Okay. So there's not, you're covering the
overage then. So there's part of this, and there may be more that you can do income-wise, but there is
part of this where you've said, okay, I'm going to go to school for the next three years and I'm going to
become a marine biologist. And by me doing that, here's what we've decided. My income is limited
and he's in his career right now. And so there's part of this that you guys have decided
by, you know, by choosing this path. And I'm not saying it's a bad thing. It's just we've both
understood that for the next three years it's going to be extremely tight. But there's a light
at the end of that tunnel because you're going to be a marine biologist. What's a marine
biologist make? It kind of depends. I'm trying to get a state job.
And that can range anywhere from 50,000 to 70,000.
Okay.
And how are you paying for school?
Right now, I am pretty set with financial aid and scholarships.
I've already finished my associates.
Good for you.
Very good.
Went through that with honors.
So I've been doing pretty well with scholarships.
So no debt, no loans.
Do you guys have any other debt or any debt at all?
Yes.
I have three credit cards, but it only,
adds up to about 1,000, maybe 1,500.
And I have a car.
How much is that?
The total on it's $28,000, and I pay $668.
There's some money.
There's a problem, Sierra.
You got to sell that car.
You got to sell it.
And I'm trying to figure out how to sell it.
So sell it?
I'm not sure because I'm $13,000.
dollar split on this car. Wow. So you owe 28,000 and how much, and you're saying you really can't
sell it except for 15,000 is what it's worth? When I had it, because I went and had it appraised at a dealership
and they said they can only give me $6,000 for it. Okay, so don't do the dealership route because they
will always give you a much lower rate than what you could actually sell it, private sale for. So go on
Kelly Bluebook.com
put in all the info and just see
on the high end what you could get
for it, okay?
So the dealership told you how much would they
pay for it?
6,000.
Oh my gosh. Wait, $6,000
and it's a $20,000 and you owe
$28,000? What kind of car is it?
It's a 2017 Jeep
Cherokee and I have 162,000
miles on it. Okay.
What is your husband drive? What's his
deal? He has
a motorcycle that's paid for.
Got you.
And we have a, we call it a hooty.
And it's just a really old beater that's also paid for.
What about the motorcycle?
What's it worth?
About $4,000.
Okay.
Yeah, I would, okay, I think, yeah, I would be selling this car Sierra for sure.
And even if it's, even if you can only get $16,000 for it,
I would rather have a $16,000 loan than a $28,000.
loan. Does that make sense? Like, that's going to change your numbers a whole lot. And if I were
you guys, do you guys have kids? We have a two-year-old. You have a two-year-old. Okay. Yeah, I mean,
I might sell the motorcycle and take the $4,000 and get a beater car for you. And then sell your car.
Yeah. I mean, honestly, because you can always go back and get a motorcycle again. But you guys,
I mean, to your point, I mean, it's going to cut that payment down when she gets a loan for whatever
it is. Almost half, possibly. Yeah. I mean, it'd be, yeah, you'd be, yeah, you'd be, yeah, you
you guys would have an extra $300 a month coming in.
Yeah.
So there's decisions here, and I think Jade set it up really well.
And it's a, it's kind of a hard pill to swallow in life,
but it's understanding that, you know, as adults,
we make decisions around our life.
And not all of them.
Yeah, not all of them are right or wrong.
It's not this, you know, oh gosh, you shouldn't be in school right now.
It's not that at all.
It is though we have decided to do this route.
and because of that
we're not going to have a lot of money
like we're going to be we're going to feel broke for three years
until I get through school
and until I get a job and all that
and in three years it's going to look different
but in the meantime what can we do
what other decisions can we make
that are going to be adult like decisions
that may hurt and they're not fun
but it's things like getting the extra job
like you guys are doing it's selling stuff
to see what you can free up
it's getting out of debt and you're freeing up
income. Cutting up those credit cards.
Cutting up credit cards. Yeah. I mean, it's doing a
couple of these, making some
of these decisions within the big decision of
the lifestyle you guys have made just to make it easier,
Sierra. And that's the thing is, is we
want peace. You know, we talk about financial
peace is what we
want for everyone. And that piece
is going to look different depending on, you know,
everyone's situation and, you know,
the way they view life and all of it. It's a little bit of,
you know, subjective to a degree.
But you don't have peace right now.
And so what I would fight so hard for,
is in these three years, how can we get some peace?
And being able to free up some money would bring some of that.
And how do we do that?
Well, I just listed out a couple options from jobs and selling stuff and all of it.
So that's what I would do.
And one of them is a long term that you've committed to.
Like, once she starts working, she's got a great pathway to make $70,000.
Oh, yeah.
And then together with your husband, yeah, y'all will be making $130,000 before taxes.
Like, that's amazing.
So the light is coming.
but it's getting to the light
that I think is really key
and what decisions can we make in between
and these are hearts here
I understand like these aren't fun
it's not always fun
but it's getting you to a goal
that you guys want together
and part of that is you still being in school
so I commend you for having a two-year-old
and doing this and I'm so sorry about
the devastation in your area
we think about you guys so much
so we're praying for you
thanks for the call
I love entrepreneurs.
Don't forget, guys, I started my company on a card table myself, so I know what it's like
to have people counting on you, your team, your family, not to mention your customers.
And when you're the one signing the paychecks, you can't afford to fly blind.
But I'll be honest, early on, one thing that nearly sunk us was wasting time with
spreadsheets that didn't add up because business units didn't talk to each other.
I finally told my team, just fix it.
And they did.
We got NetSuite.
That was years ago, and we've never looked back.
See, NetSuite isn't just for tech giants.
It's built for growing businesses like yours.
Over 43,000 businesses already run on NetSuite, including a lot that started just like you.
And now, with built-in AI, NetSuite is helping them even more.
It's one system connected to every part of your business for real-time insights, not guesswork.
NetSuite AI flags inventory issues, cash flow risks, even supplier delays before they become problems.
So you can trust the data, stop wasting time, and make the right decisions faster.
Take a free product tour today at netsuite.com slash Ramsey.
That's netsuite.com slash Ramsey.
You're listening to the Ramsey Show.
We help people with your life, your money, your relationships.
If that's you, you want to get in on the action.
You can call us up.
It's a live show.
The number is 888825-5-2-25, and we'll get you on the line.
Today's question, today's Ramsey Show question of the day is sponsored by Why Refive?
when you're trapped in a maze of defaulted private student loan debt, it's hard to find your way
out. But Y-R-R-R-Fi can offer you a lifeline with custom refinancing based on your ability to pay
and a lump-sum payoff option that you could qualify for after 24 months. So go to Y-refi.com
slash Ramsey. That's the letter Y-R-E-F-Y dot com slash Ramsey. Remember, it may not be available in all
states. Today's question comes from Lauren in New Mexico. I currently own three rental properties
and have 30-year mortgages on two of them. You say to have 15-year mortgages because you pay it off
faster. If I am putting my profits from my rental toward my principal on a 30-year mortgage and can
pay it off in 15 years, is there a need to switch it to a 15-year mortgage? What's the reasoning
behind the 15-year mortgage? I make more profits with a lower monthly payment, which puts more
money towards the principal. Well, Lauren, for starters, we would say not to even have rental
property if you're not able to pay cash for it. So technically speaking, I mean, if you could pay it
off quickly, I would probably just sell one and throw some of the equity at the other and make
that a goal to sell it. But having, yeah, three rentals that have mortgages on them. Yeah, not the
best idea, not really the Rams way to do it. But for your primary home,
we do say a 15, even though people, you know,
this is one of those that I feel like is a slippery slope
because, you know, a lot of people still do the 30
and, you know, whatever it is.
But the thing to remember is your intentions
don't always line up with reality.
So if you have the intention of paying a 30, like a 15,
you know, stuff happens.
And you're like, oh, yeah, well, we won't pay extra this month.
We'll make sure to catch up next month.
And then something else happens.
And you end up usually not.
paying it's truly like like a 30 you don't now when you're paying off your house in the baby
steps we do find that people are paying their houses off in like nine to 11 years right which is
amazing so I think that 15 year fixed rate mortgage that we talk about it just locks you in
to a plan to get you out of debt faster with the guarantee that you will get it paid off in 15
years it makes you accountable yeah let's be let's call a spade a spade the truth is if you go
with a 30 year, you're not paying as much, so you get more house. Yes. And I think truthfully,
when people want that, they want more house and not when you're locked into 15, though,
it's like, okay, maybe suddenly I can't afford what I thought I could get. Yes. So look at the root of the,
yeah. And that's the thing, that's what's always interesting with houses is that you're going to
qualify for a lot more house and what they will give you than what you necessarily need or even
what's good for you financially. So we always talk about having at least 5% to put down
for a down payment. Your payment being no more than 25% of your take-home pay on a 15-year
fixed rate, which I always say, we understand. That is a very conservative formula when it comes
to the housing situation. But just like our last caller, you guys, like you see people like get into
housing situations and it takes half their income or maybe one spouse chooses to stay home,
but you can't because you've built your life around, you know, having a dual income. And it just
starts to limit your choices. The deeper you go into debt, the longer you're in debt,
it just limits your life choices on what you can and can't do because it's telling you basically
what to do. So that's it, Lauren. All right. That's really good advice. Let's talk to Greg. He's in
Biloxi, Mississippi. What's going on, Greg? Hey, Jade and Rachel. It's so good to be talking
to y'all. I'm bandgirling a little bit right now. Glad you're here. So I have been listening for a little
over a year, but the month before I started listening, I co-signed on a truck for my now ex-fiance.
Oh, Greg, I'm sorry.
Yeah, rough situation.
So we had agreed once things ended that, hey, you know, we can keep alone as it is for a year
because we needed to wait for the maturity date.
Okay.
And so it's coming up on that.
And just in talking to her on occasion,
she most likely is not in a position to refinance it on her own.
And she has said that her parents or anyone else won't help her.
Good for them.
So I, yeah, yeah, definitely.
Just from my, from my perspective,
I'm not quite sure how I can get myself out of this.
Have you tried persuading her to sell it and start over fresh on her own?
I have.
She is not completely opposed to the idea, but I don't think I can really rely on her actually
following that through.
Can I ask a question?
And I promise it does kind of relate to this.
Who broke up with who?
No, you're good.
I ended things with her.
Okay.
It makes it a little stickier.
It makes it stickier because this is a tie to you.
This is a way for you to still be in her life.
And I don't...
You're getting pulled over, Greg?
No, there's an alarm going off somewhere.
Oh, okay.
I was like, oh, no, are you driving getting pulled over?
But my point is, like, this is a tie to you.
And if things were different, I'd say you could make the argument of like,
hey, you broke things off and I want a clean break and I need to, you know, be free from this.
Like, you could make that argument, but in this case, it does make it a little tough.
How much is the loan for?
There's about 27 left on it.
Okay.
Man, how much is it worth, do you know?
I actually did look up the Kelly Blue Book a couple weeks ago, and it said that private
party sale was tops like 23.
Oh, gosh.
And it's upside down.
Yeah.
Okay.
yeah this I think this is only going to get worse um so I would really encourage her to sell it and I'd be strong on that I'd say listen there's a reason that you can't ref I mean the math is like the logical reason is there's a reason you can't refinance this and the reason is the bank has looked at your financial situation and said it's not stable you cannot afford this on your own which means they expect you to default which means I'm here for when you default that's what that means and I
I don't know what. The hard part is I don't know if your relationship is there for you to even talk to her like that anymore.
But that's the truth of the matter. I know because I mean, if you can't, you can't make her do anything.
And so you really are kind of at the mercy of her. I'm like, you can't go in and, you know, take your name off the loan in secret.
Right. I mean, like, yeah. So it is. So yeah, you're in a tough position, Greg. And it's kind of one of those, I'm sorry that you're going to have to be one of the sad examples that we'll probably use this week to say when someone calls.
I should, you know, my girlfriend wants me to co-signed.
We're going to say, talk to Greg in Biloxi.
Greg would tell you don't do this because this is what happens.
My family agrees, my family agrees that this is the dumbest decision.
Oh, Greg.
Oh, man.
I mean, unless you can just convince her because you're a great salesman,
but coming from an ex-fiance, she's probably not going to want to listen to her,
to your advice.
No.
broke her heart.
Sorry, Greg.
And now you're, you're, I mean, yeah, there's nothing you can do.
So I think it's one of those stupid texts, you know, and I'm praying she doesn't default.
Me too.
And she just pays this and gets out of it.
But you, but that's what's- She has been very consistent on the payment.
Yeah, okay.
What is the payment?
Oh, gosh, it's almost seven.
Oh, gosh.
I mean, listen, the most practical thing you can do to be ready for this storm is if she defaults.
Is it if she defaults.
And to be ready, if you kind of have some money pack.
away on the side because if she doesn't pay it, it reflects on you. And when it's time for you to buy a
house or when it's time for you to do some of the things that you want to do, if you still have a
credit score laying around which you will because of this, it will make it bad. And as we've
talked about on the show, having a bad credit score is very difficult. We talk about having a zero
credit score, which is wonderful, but this will keep you from having that, even if you pay off all of
your other debts. So if I were in your shoes, which this is the game we like to play, I would be
Which, by the way, we don't know much about your financial situation.
Do you have debt?
The truck technically, and then I have about 22,000 in student loans I'm working on.
I've already gotten rid of the credit card debt.
Well, I'd go gung-ho on your debt.
I'd work the baby steps on that.
And then when I was through, I would be mindful of keeping some money stacked up.
Yeah, for your emergency fund, knowing this is something you may have to depend to.
Exactly.
And I would tell her, too, Greg, you don't want to emotionally be attached anymore, right?
And this keeps you guys somewhat together in a weird state for the future.
So I'm sorry.
I hate that that's happening to you.
All right, that does it for this hour of the show.
Stick around.
We'll be right back with you before you know it.
Don't let big grocery bills spoil your holiday plans.
Shop at Aldi first.
They've got USDA choice meats like beef, pork, and even your turkey, along with fresh produce,
holiday desserts and more, and you'll find all of them at the lowest prices of any national
grocery store. A family of four can save up to $4,000 a year by shopping at Aldi. You don't
need a membership or some loyalty app either, so stop overpaying this holiday season. Go to
aldi.us to find a store near you. That's aldi.us. Savings based on regional analysis.
of Aldi versus select competitors.
Prices may vary by location,
product availability, and the market.
Welcome back to The Ramsey Show
in the Fairwinds Credit Union Studio.
I'm Rachel Cruz, and we are going to the phones.
First up, we have Donna in Samp.
San Antonio.
Hi, Donna.
Welcome to the show.
Hi.
Thanks for taking my question.
I appreciate it.
Yes, absolutely.
Okay, so my husband
has a student
loan that is
currently in deferment.
It's been in deferment
over 10 years.
Prior to that, it was in default.
It ballooned from 65,000
to 340,000.
What?
We got, yeah,
pretty scary.
I know, I know.
There was some fraud.
involved we tried to take care of it with some attorneys we were not able to get anywhere we're
stuck with it we got married four years ago his situation is he's 66 close to retirement he
doesn't really have any assets not really no any no savings I'm 57 probably going to work for
another five years I've got about 1.4 million in investment assets which are own free and clear
we both have a joint account with Charles Schwab which has about two
hundred thousand in it, but it's fully funded by me. And then we have two other properties in both
of our names. A couple of questions. How can I navigate negotiating this balance down for him? I'm
willing to pay up to $100,000 for it. And how do I protect myself? Are they private loans or
federal loans? So they're federal loans. They were, well, I believe they're federal loans. See,
I've had trouble with this. They were federal loans. And then
they were consolidated. Okay. So, and from what I understand, you know, I've, I've been to so many
different places, and I keep hitting a brick wall. It's like nobody can really give me the right
answers. I've been told I can't negotiate. If they're federal, you can't negotiate. If they're
private, you can, but if the whole lump of them, if that whole lump is federal, you owe what you
owe. So what's his best route? Does he just keep deferring it?
No. I mean, he will never be able to pay these off. You know, he'll never be able to pay it.
So what, tell me about the properties, because I'm going to, here, I'll tell you what Rachel and I are going to do, and then we'll explain it.
We're going to approach this as any married couple would, who is dedicated their lives to each other and has decided that they're one, meaning that they're one in life and money and all of those things.
And then we can go back and trace it back if we need to, but let's talk about these properties because what I think is,
Somewhere in the assets between the two of you is the money to pay this off.
I'm just...
Yeah, there's definitely money.
I built this.
I mean, we've only been married four years.
All of those assets are mine.
I mean, I've done what I needed to do, and I've built...
How many marriages have you guys had in the past, Donna?
He's been married once before, and so have I.
Okay.
So it's both second marriages.
Okay.
Did you do a pre-nup at all?
No, we have our wills, but we didn't...
didn't do a pre-up, no. Okay. Can I ask a little bit about that? Um, so I'm hearing you talk,
and it sounds like you very much want to protect the wealth that you built, um, but you didn't
sign a pre-up, which makes me wonder about that. Like, how did you, how did you view that?
I didn't realize how, um, you know, I don't know. What can I say? We're soulmates.
Okay. Listen, that's good to know. We're soulmates. And then, you know, he's a
wonderful man and I'm not concerned about really protecting my assets from him.
I'm more concerned about protecting my assets against somebody coming in and swooping in,
a lender coming in and taking it. Okay. So in that case, I loved hearing you say that because
it sounded at first like when you said, oh, I'm only willing to put $100,000 towards this,
it sounded like you were trying to keep your assets from him, right? Like you didn't want to spend
too much on his debt. That's the way it sounded at first. But now it sounds like,
that's not the issue and if that's the case can you tell us about these properties because
the money might be there to get free and clear of this it's all real estate basically and again
they're all own free and clear right how much how much are into the properties um how much am i
into the properties probably you know five or six hundred thousand so tell us probably around
five or six hundred tell us property one what's property one worth um so i've
I've got a condo, which is probably worth around $200,000.
Okay.
I've got another house, which is around $250.
I've got another condo, which is probably also around $200,000.
Are they all owned free and clear?
Yes.
Okay.
Good for you.
Yeah.
Way to go.
Great, Donna.
Did you know about his debt going into the marriage?
I didn't.
I knew he.
What happened is his wife, his previous wife handled all the finances.
She was a stay-at-home.
She did some funky stuff with their finances, and he thought his student loans were paid off.
He didn't realize until suddenly he didn't get a tax refund one year that he was in default.
He didn't even know.
So it really was like a big shock.
And then, you know, he just, sometimes men just ignore things.
I think it was too emotionally overwhelming for him
and he pretty much just put it to the side
so I knew there was something
I didn't realize
How many years did he put it to the side?
Probably about 13 years total
Okay so there's enough of a
That the shock has worn off
And then we can address reality
that he chose not to though
Right
Right now he's got to bother you right
Does that bother you?
Of course it does
Of course it does.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
But right now, I'm committed to the relationship.
I'm committed to my husband.
And I want to figure out.
And you guys are in your, what, 50, you say you're...
57 and 66.
Yeah, yeah, he's 66.
I'm 57.
Okay, and he has, why does he have no...
What's he been doing?
Like, like, with retirement and all that?
He pretty much gave everything to her in the divorce.
They didn't have...
They didn't have...
It was, like, no content.
just give her what she wants?
Give her what she wants, yeah.
Is he working?
He works for me.
Actually, I have a business.
Okay.
He does work for me.
Okay.
How much is he making?
We just have him making something like around $50,000.
So we've been keeping it low.
You know, we do sort of, you know, W-2.
Is real estate your business?
Is that your business?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah. Yeah. So there's, I hear two things going on here. I think you're committed to this guy. I, you know, great. I think that you need to reach over and probably sell one of these condos and then go into the joint funds and pay this thing off. That's probably the choice that I would make. I think you guys, I'm worried that and I'm going to say this ever so delicately. There's a, there's a, there's a, there's,
a balance of power here that is, feels off. Yeah. And I think that if you don't address certain
things, it's going to cause issues down the line. And I think you need to sit with a count.
Do you see what I'm saying? I think you need to stand that completely. You need to sit
with somebody and work through this because it almost feels like you're kind of just taking care
of this guy. And it shouldn't feel like that. You should feel like you're in a marriage where
equal people are really contributing. Whatever.
it is they're going to contribute, but you should feel good about it.
Hey, it's Dave Ramsey. You've heard me talk about the importance of giving,
and I love that Xander insurance lives that out. This month, Zander is donating 25% of all
ID theft protection sales to Team Rubicon, a veteran-led disaster response organization that
deploys wherever disaster strikes, boots on the ground, helping families rebuild and offering
real hope for communities in crisis. Zander's been supporting causes like Team Rubicon for over a
decade, donating over half a million dollars. That kind of track record shows I can trust them,
not just with my money, but helping protect my identity too. Zander's ID theft protection plan
is the only one I recommend, because let's face it, identity theft is out of control.
In today's online world, it's not a matter of if, but when.
Zander's plan is comprehensive, affordable, and you can even give it as a gift.
So, protect your family and support a powerful mission this Christmas.
Go to zander.com or call 800356-42.82. That's zander.com.
Welcome back to the Ramsey show.
Up next we have Brent in Cincinnati, Ohio.
Hey, Brent.
Welcome to the show.
Hi, Rachel.
Hello.
How can we help?
So I'm wondering if I'm able to purchase
a car for my wife.
We've been leasing to own for the three years
in the upcoming December.
We can purchase it for $19,000.
The same car is valued at $23,000.
Okay.
So you've been leasing it for three years.
What was it worth when you started?
I'm just wondering how much it's depreciated.
How much?
No, how much was it worth?
28,000.
Okay. Okay. And now it's worth 19, but you're saying you've seen it other places for 23. Is that what you're telling me?
Yes, with the same mileage, the same year.
So it looks like a good deal.
Yeah. Do you have the money? And do you like the car?
We like the car, but we don't have the money. So we'd be getting a loan through my credit union.
Oh.
And what's the alternative?
You just give it up?
Yes.
Do you have any?
My wife's very attached to the vehicle and doesn't really want to consider any cheaper options.
Yeah.
Listen, I can understand that.
Go ahead.
Well, yeah, why is she attached to it?
She just likes it a lot?
She likes a lot.
Well, the fact that she's not going to be able to consider.
Is she sitting there with you, Brent?
Tell her hi for us.
Yes.
What's her name?
Elizabeth.
Hey, Elizabeth.
So, yeah, I mean, when you put yourself in a position when you purchase something and say, well, I'm just not, I don't want to look at anything cheaper, you've kind of already made your decision.
I mean, if you guys don't have the money and you don't look anything cheaper, I mean, I guess the only thing that you guys have decided at that point is, yeah, you're going to take a loan out and buy the car.
We would advise you differently.
and so you called the show
so we'll give you our advice
I don't know if you're going to want to take it
because what you've realized
is you've been basically renting this car
for three years
in the most expensive way possible
in the most expensive way yeah
and I know you can't really tell the interest rate
on a least car but when people actually ratio it out
it's high it's usually more expensive
than if you went got a traditional car loan
so then you're going to take a $19,000 loan
pay interest
on that and then we're going to look up in four to five years and this $19,000 car is going to go down
to probably $10,000 or $12,000 in value. So when it comes to cars, it is one of the places
that financially speaking, I mean, it's kind of one of the dumbest debts you can get into
from a financial perspective because, again, you're borrowing money and paying more on that
borrowed money because of interest on an asset that's going down in value versus like a house, a mortgage,
right you take out a mortgage you do pay interest on that loan but the value of that home is going up
at the same time so the car itself is not a wise purchase to make when you don't have cash for it so my
next question to you guys would be do you have any cash available to you do we have no we don't
we're still trying to get over some credit card debt okay good how much debt do you guys have
And then we have a few monthly payments.
What are those?
We're paying off our wedding rings, which we have $7,000 left over.
Okay.
And then we have some, a personal loan we're paying back my parents, which we owe about
$2,500 left.
Okay.
And I'm doing $500 every paycheck.
Okay.
So towards the end of January,
the $500 a month will clear up.
Okay.
How much do you guys make a year?
Close to $40,000 a year.
Combined?
Yes.
Are you both working?
My wife is looking at getting a new job that could make more money soon, but we just don't
have the money yet, and I don't want to make decisions on we'll have more money later.
Yeah, that's right.
make the decision on what we have.
Absolutely, which is very wise, very, very wise.
So, yeah, a $40,000 income, there's no way I would take a $19,000 loan for a car.
You can't afford it.
Do you guys have kids yet?
No, not yet.
Listen, I'm going to throw something wild out here and roll it over in your minds and
in your hearts tonight, but she's not working yet.
You don't have children.
When it comes time for this lease, like you let it go.
but if you have to be a one car family
for a couple of months while you save up
what's the harm in that
just a thought
I suggest that my husband and I did that
while we were trying to get out of debt
we got rid of one of our vehicles
and we were upside down but we got a small
loan for it to get out of it
and then we had just our single car
we paid it off and then we actually found
that it was doable for us for quite a while
and we stayed that way and then when it was ready
time for us to have a second car, we bought it in cash. And for you guys in this season of your
life, that actually might work out better for you than a lot of other couples because she's not
really working yet. And I'm going to say this, Brent, and I'm going to be very as kind and fun as
Rachel is, as this comes through. But what the life you guys just described to us from a financial
perspective only is so normal. You have a personal loan to the parents for, I'm not sure,
why you got wedding rings you didn't have money so you guys took out a loan you have some credit card
debt you have a car lease like this is you guys are y'all are the normal americans out there but the
problem is brett normal is broke normal is 78% of americans today are living paycheck to paycheck
meaning if you miss a paycheck you don't have enough to cover your bills so if you guys decide that
you want to continue to live normally then what you guys have have so far decided is that and and normal would
to go get just keep the $19,000 car because you like it that is normal and you will have normal
results because of it but what we encourage people is to flip all of that onto their head
and actually say what is the weirdest thing we can do because if I get the results of normal
which is paycheck to paycheck living and not being able to build wealth and not be able to invest
or save for the future or have any amount of money in savings like I don't want to be normal
that's not where I want to be and if you guys look at each other tonight and say we don't want to be
that. We want to be people that have no debt. We have an emergency funds. We're actually funding
some retirement for the future. We have a house that we can afford. It doesn't stress us out. We have
margin in our budget. Like this life that can be created, Brett, is possible, totally possible.
But you can't get there if you keep doing normal things. So what Jade's saying is a one car family
for a couple of doesn't have kids. Is that inconvenient? Yeah. Is that weird? Yeah.
but you know what?
You don't have a car payment
because that car payment
on the $19,000 car
it's going to be $600
that you guys don't have.
So you have to make different decisions
if you want different results, Brett,
and that's going to mean
not taking out a loan for a car.
For you guys,
the reality is a one car family.
It's saying goodbye to my emotions,
saying goodbye to what I want
and what I love
and all the things
that got me to this place.
And you put all that decided
and you guys are like,
we're adults.
Yeah, we're adults.
and we're going to make adult-like decisions
and we don't have the money.
We can't afford this car.
You can't afford this car, Brett.
At $40,000, you can't afford
half of your annual income going
to the value of a car.
Like that, it's not good.
That's not wise.
And I would be working like crazy
to get your income up.
And I would start working to get out of debt.
I mean, you guys could get all this paid off.
Your debt's not crazy.
I mean, it's, you know, $2,500, $4,000.
Like, you guys can get this cleaned up really fast.
If you just say, we're going to be weird and we're going to work 60 hours a week.
Because we don't have kids and we're going to take side hustles.
We're going to drive Uber, right?
I mean, like, here's, Brent, let me put this in perspective.
Here's a couple of interesting statistics about cars because I want you to never go
and have a car payment again.
Number one, Rachel just said 78% of the people living paycheck to paycheck, right?
85% of people who buy, who get a car take out a loan or at least to get it.
And I think that's a very interesting correlation.
Almost everybody.
Almost everybody.
which is almost the same percentage of people living paycheck to paycheck.
And for most people, that car payment is about $525 a month, which is very close to where you guys were at.
And if you invested that instead of give it to a car company, what would that be, Jay?
Well, think about it.
Most new car payments are over a term of six years.
If you had listened to us and invested that money over the last six years, you'd have $85,000
instead of a car debt that's gone down in value.
And so be weird, Brent.
Be weird.
The calendar might have flipped, but the way to win with money hasn't changed, living on a budget, staying out of debt, and building wealth intentionally.
Now, here's the deal. Most banks make their money when you don't do that.
They're fine if you stay broke and a frustration.
And that's why I recommend Fair Wins Credit Union.
They actually want you to win with money.
Their smart bundle gives you a no-fee checking account, a high-yield savings account,
and the new Ramsey Be Weird debit card that says,
dead as normal, be weird, right on the front.
It's not just a card, it's a statement.
Because every time you use it, it says you control your money.
Your money doesn't control you.
So this year, stick to your plan.
Don't chase gimmicks or points and partner with a credit union that helps you make progress in the baby steps.
Visit fairwinds.org slash Ramsey to take control of your money and stay weird.
Fairwinds is federally insured by the NCUA.
Listeners of the show, the people that view it on YouTube and watch us.
But one of the best ways to help spread the word is to share the show with the people that you know, your friends, your family, even on your social media feeds.
But, you know, even subscribing, leaving reviews, all of that helps because with the algorithms of today, when you're able to get this show in front of people that may not know about it, just like our last caller, he just said he just found us like two days ago on YouTube.
Facebook. Yeah, or on Facebook, is that what it was said. And yeah, and it's just, it's great because we want to be able to help people. That's our goal for the show. And the more people we can help, the better we're doing at our jobs is the way we look at it. So thank you again, you guys, for subscribing and sharing. We really, really appreciate it. All right. Up next, we have Wanda in Los Angeles. Hey, Wanda. Welcome to the show. Hi, thank you so much. It's really a pleasure to be on the show. Thank you for taking my call. So I do apologize you from high.
For verbal is the excitement and the coffee couple together.
You're good, Wanda.
You're great.
How can we help?
So I recently got a divorce and I owe my husband $50,000 and I'm not quite sure where to take the money from or borrow the money from for the $50,000.
I don't have any money in my savings.
I owe $25,000 on my car, $12,000 to my 401k.
and my other expense is my home in my mortgage is 2470 a month.
I looked into refinance, and I really don't want to refinance my house
because my interest rate on my house is two and a quarter.
And so I've been looking at other, like, HELOC, personal loans,
but personal loan is like 12%.
The HELOC is 10%.
And I just don't know what's where to go.
Yeah, for sure.
The $50,000, is it because of the house?
Like, are you supposed to give him the equity?
Yes, I'm supposed to give him the equity out of the house.
Originally, I was supposed to give him $150,000, but he knows that he didn't put any money into the house or anything like that.
So he settled and said, I'll take $50,000.
So I'm just trying to figure out the best course to give him the $50,000.
I did take on a second job.
I've been working the second job now for about three months.
I haven't received any monies for it because I just haven't turned it.
and then the invoices.
Sure.
Because,
um,
what's the time frame that you owe the 50K?
Um,
it's supposed to be third,
because we went back to court.
So it's 30 days after the,
um,
court ruling until the,
and I got the court ruling in the mail two weeks ago.
So I have.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So into basically in two to three weeks it's due?
Yes.
Okay.
Um,
so let me kind of set the stage for this right.
is his name on the mortgage?
Like, is he on the deed or the title of the house?
It is.
So typically what would happen if you're divorced,
you would do a refinance to get his name off of it
and you would do a cash out refinance
so that you could also pull the 50K out,
give him his money,
and now you're free and clear from that.
But I see why you don't want to do that
because of the interest rate.
But I, now double check this
because I'm not sure.
But I feel like you can, when you refinance,
you don't necessarily have to refinance the entire,
entire mortgage, yeah.
But just the amount that you're.
A portion of it.
Yes.
Yeah.
And so a portion of it would be at the old interest rate
and a portion of it would be at the new interest rate.
Yeah.
Have you talked to your lawyer, Wanda, about different options when it,
considering it's because of the house and his name is on it.
So you are going to have to get.
his name off the home.
Yeah.
Right.
So what I was advised was, I actually talked to and the accountant.
And so what I was advised to do was to do a quick deed to take his name off the title.
And he agrees to stay on the loan, let his name stay on the loan.
Because if I asked him to take his name off the loan, they may make me refinance anyways,
and then I lose the two and a quarter.
And so he said he was agreeable with his name being on the loan and he was just quick deed
to home into my name.
Yeah, a quick deed is definitely a great option when it comes to the situation.
Yeah, I mean, and we never tell people to go and take on debt,
but there is a point that you're going to be owed this from a legal standpoint.
And so you have to give that money, and Wanda, you don't have it right now.
And so I don't want to see you take equity out of your home
and get into that mess of a he lock or anything like that.
So it may just have to be a personal loan.
Okay.
even though the interest rate for the personal loans is just through the roof.
Well, my, I mean, from the court of law, you have to give this money.
So either, Wanda, you sell your home and, you know, do you mean, take the, take the equity and pay him what he's due and you have to go find a new situation.
Are you able to sustain the home that you're in?
Oh, most definitely.
Most definitely.
Okay.
Yeah.
The house is now worth almost $700,000.
When we purchased the house, it was at $391.
So I'm very comfortable. How much do you owe on it? How much do you owe on it?
360. Okay. And in California, I came by another house at 391 and not in the area that I live in any way.
Sure, sure. How much do you make? How much are you making? I make $188,000 a year.
Good for you, Wanda. And you're bringing, how much are you bringing home after taxes and insurance and everything per month?
What's your take-home pay?
A little over $6,000. Okay.
Yeah, I mean, and your mortgage payment's $2,000.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, so you're in.
And that's the reason why I got a second job, too, because whatever I do, I want to chop it down.
With the second job, I just had received any of, because I don't know which way to go with that yet.
100%.
Yeah, I mean, I mean, you're kind of stuck between, you know, a hard place.
I don't want you to make a bad decision with your home.
I think that would be unwise, so it's not this idea that, like, you know, and it's one thing if you couldn't afford the payment.
on your income, but you're able to sustain that,
which is wonderful and great.
But yeah, I would, I would, yeah, do the quick deed.
I would, again, ask the accountant again,
wrap back around and just ask what Jade was talking about.
And if there's a way to take a portion of it
where you're able to pay him out of it,
and the entire loan is not then, you know,
subject to the new interest rates,
because that would be, that would not be smart.
And it's a blessing that he dropped from 150 to 50,000,
thousand like that's a big blessing yeah so so wanda i mean i'm looking at this so let's just
say you have you have you have fifty thousand dollars in debt because of the divorce you got a
twenty five thousand dollar car and you got a twelve thousand dollar four oh one k debts uh seven
eight i mean that's yeah that's 87 thousand you make a hundred and eighty eight thousand i want
you to pay this off in 18 months wanda that's why i got a second job yeah which i'm so
proud of you seriously so yeah and that's the thing is you know that um
When you look at this high income, I'm like, man, this is, and I know you're in Southern California,
so it doesn't go as far as it would in Kansas City or something. I get it.
But man, you have a lot on your side, Wanda, but from this point forward, I want you to draw that
line in the sand and say no more. I'm not doing car payments. We're not doing credit cards.
We're not, you know, borrow an R 401K. I'm living on what I make. I'm going to be, you know,
funding retirement. Why is because, I mean, how old are you, Wanda?
55. 55. Yeah. So 55 this year. It's great.
So, yeah, here in five to ten years wanting to retire, you know, and do something with your life.
And you're going to be able to make a lot of progress really quickly, which I'm so excited for you.
So congratulations.
I'm so sorry that, you know, with the divorce and everything that's kind of brought you to this point,
that's always heartbreaking and grief in and of itself.
That's so hard.
But you have a lot of great change ahead and a lot of things that you can do and make a big impact.
Thank goodness that he was a good guy and was like, I know I didn't put any money into this house.
Right. It could have been 150. Yeah. I mean, that's, I think that's the really difficult part about one of the many difficult parts about divorces. There's all these assets. And it's like somebody gets to keep the house. But if you've been living in that house together, there's also a portion of it that goes to the other spouse. And so how do they get their money? And so that's one of the frustrating things. And I know like during these times where interest rates, it's like, if I had it at, you know, 2.3 percent, you don't.
want to refinance in order to with these rates and so I think that's very painful yes for sure yep and
again it's one of these things that to tackle the debt snowball method and even looking at the car
I mean she's still she can pay off her car in 18 12 to 18 months 100% you know buffer so she can
keep the car pay it off it's not an outrageous you know different amount considering her income but she
never needs to borrow from her 401k never again no Wanda you hear me thanks for calling in this
The Ramsey Show.
thing you need this holiday season is more stuff collecting dust or tech that keeps you
glued to screens and up too late. You need better sleep. And that's what you'll get with
Casper. Their mattresses are made for deep uninterrupted rest that keep you cool and comfortable. So
you wake up feeling ready, not wrecked. Because rest is not a luxury, it's an investment. And
the ROI is your well-being. So go to casper.com slash Ramsey and use promo code Ramsey for
25% off mattresses and 10% off everything else.
You get free shipping, too.
That's casper.com slash Ramsey.
Promo code Ramsey.
Exclusions apply.
Buying or selling your home.
It's a really big deal,
and you want an expert in your quarter
fighting for you to get the best deal
and the best price, honestly.
It's probably your largest asset that you're ever going to buy or sell.
So you want this to be a really smooth process.
And the Ramsey Trusted program is the only way to find a top agent that you can trust
who will make sure that your home is a blessing and not a burden.
And it's easy because you can compare agent profiles, interview them,
and choose the right one that you want to work for you.
So find a local trusted real estate pro for free at RamseySolutions.com slash agent.
Or click the link in the description.
if you are listening to this on podcast or watching on YouTube.
We mentioned in an earlier segment, Jade, that, you know, about college and school and all of it.
And it is Teacher Financial Literacy Month or Teacher Appreciation Month and Financial Literacy Month.
And we just appreciate teachers around here.
I know Jade and I, we both have kids in school.
And when you have teachers who are part of your own story from being in school, and now if you have kids that are in school, they're just such a,
gift like these teachers are just absolutely incredible we love them so we do want to honor them so
make sure to enter our teacher appreciation giveaway at rs.com slash teacher yes and we want to
celebrate you so make sure to check that out teachers all right let's go to sarah in philadelphia
hi sarah welcome to the show hi thanks for having me absolutely how can we help okay so um just
really quick. So when I turned 18, I got married to a man who's about 14 years older than me.
We ended up getting a divorce. It was like a really controlling situation. But in the midst,
I did get pregnant right as soon as I got married. So I have a baby now. She's going to be five
months in May. And so he doesn't help financially. I did stay home after I had the baby.
So I was leaning on him financially. And even when we were,
were together, I didn't go to school.
So the good part is I don't have any debt or anything, but the bad part is, like, I don't
have, like, a career path because I went right into being, like, wife and mother and everything.
Sure.
And now I just, like, need help with, like, how do you, where is your parents, your family
situation through all of this from when you got married to now?
So, um, we got married.
And, like, my parents were not super happy with the idea of me getting married, not because they didn't want me getting married young.
I can hear the circumstances. Yeah. And they probably picked up some things around town that they probably didn't like being a 34-year-old, you know. Yeah. Exactly. And then, um, so we ended up, um, we ended up getting a divorce time, staying at my parents now. Because we took to get in the right house. Okay. Wow. Yeah. I'm sorry.
yeah and he it's okay actually his family has been not his family his brother and his brother's wife
have been great throughout this um they let me stay in their house for two weeks without like
churning me anything they were super helpful when everything happened they were like listen
whatever you need we're here for you like his brother will his brother's wife will call me every
day his brother was always like if you need any help with a baby like we're here yeah that's great
you need that community right now like if you have that to depend
on, I would because the truth is, if you are going to get out of this, it's going to require you
working some hours, like working a full-time job probably to support your family. And child care
is going to be a huge piece of this. So the question then becomes is what can you do for money, right?
Yeah. So thankfully, I'm staying home with my mom. Like, my parents are thankfully well off.
So, like, it's a place that I can stay and I don't have to worry about like, well, what about the
bills are about you know my parents are like okay with all that stuff it's just like I just don't know
where to go from here what you know it's not like I'm in any danger right now I just don't know yeah
the next steps for you right in life yeah turning because you'll be yeah turning 20 and all of it okay
so I um just because of what you've gone through Sarah from a divorce standpoints having a child
and I never want to minimize someone because of their age but I'm going to say because you're 19 I mean
like you're a kid where you're still a teenager technically 19 right so yeah so so that all of those
factors I do want to give you so much grace like you're still a teenager you're still figuring out
how the world works let alone the responsibility and the events that you've walked through through
a divorce already right so like just we have a lot of time here Sarah there is no I do not feel like
this is a rush situation there's a lot a lot of grace here okay I just feel like I'm like sliding down
you're not like a hill you know oh yes yeah if you feel a problem
out of control. So I understand that. Yes. But you're not sliding down in an unresponsible way
financially or something, right? You're fine. Okay. So I just want you to just... No, yeah. Like,
I have no debt. If I have a lot on credit cards, it's like $40. Like, I have no debt. I have money
saved up. I just don't know what to do. Yep. As the divorce final, is all of that done? Any legal
bills or anything outstanding there? So that's finished. And as he have any responsibility,
like from the divorce, any child support coming in?
any joint. I'm sorry.
Oh, okay. She has to file check for child support.
So this is only, yeah, this has only been a month. I have to file still.
File for divorce or child support? Yeah, file for just divorce.
Oh, okay. So you're not, okay, so it's not even, okay. Okay. All right. And yeah. So,
yeah, that's why I'm like, I feel like everything is exploring. Do you have a good lawyer? Do you, do you have someone?
I don't. Legal representation? Okay. So that would be step one. That's going to be step one.
Yeah. Is to find someone in your.
your area who's who's who's who's a great divorce lawyer i mean you're going to want somebody
um they're supporting you and representing you so i would honestly sarah i would make that step
one is to find that person um because when you file all this is about to it's about to snowball
into a lot of things and um and you're going to probably you or your parents will be paying
yeah for some of this too so so that would be my first goal find somebody and then figure out okay
from a money standpoint.
How is this working?
How, yeah, how much are we going to have to have?
Because that's going to allow you to know.
He hasn't helped with the baby since she was born.
And he might, he might, it'll probably take a court order for him to.
And even still, he might not.
And so for you, I think.
Yeah, I'm just trying to figure out, like, what I do without, like, I'm trying not to depend
on him at all.
Don't, well, don't depend on him.
Don't depend on him right now.
What Rachel says, right, first step you get the divorce lawyer.
second step you sit down with mom and dad and say okay we're getting the divorce lawyer how do we pay for
this and find out what help you have and what help you don't have and in that same conversation
that's also a good time to figure out okay mom and dad like this thing is happening i don't live
with him anymore and kind of figure out what create a plan and a vision for the future right it's
how long can i stay here what's that got to look like and guys everybody set really clear
expectations of what that means.
Do I, can I stay here for a year?
Can I stay here for it?
And really talk this through because then when you know what the plan is, you'll feel
better and then you'll know what you can actually focus on.
If you know that you have 12 months and then at the 12 month point, your parents expect
you to either start paying some sort of rent or I don't know what you'll decide.
But then that will inform, okay, what do I need to do next?
Yeah.
And I would say too, you know, because we always do talk about.
about that expectation like what jade saying and in this case sarah you know maybe that expectation
is dependent upon your next step yeah and how long the divorce takes um it may even be of if you need to
go back to school and while you're in school you can stay with them right so it's kind of mapping out
and again this is not in a rush sarah for you i really don't feel like you have to do all of this
tonight by any means but this is kind of your next big steps is finding the lawyer filing starting that
process. And then in the meantime, because it's good for you, Sarah, to be thinking through
what does my future look like to Jane's point? So what is the next steps? What does it look
like? And just paying a broad stroke of like, okay, if I'm 23, what does it look like for me to
self-sustain? That's right. To pay rents, all that. Do I need a college degree to do that? Do I love,
you know, accounting and I probably need to go get, you know, a degree in that? I actually worked as
like a secretary for several construction businesses. I like doing that.
Okay, so admin, yeah, administration is probably really high up in your skill set.
Yeah, so finding those kind of things and then backing out from there and say, okay, you know,
would I be able just to plug in with one or two businesses around to be able just to start working, you know,
maybe in the next six months and that's great.
Or do I need to go back to school, right?
And then with your parents being that safety net for you right now, how much are they willing to be a safety net financially for you right now?
And from a time housing perspective, like what Jay to say.
But Sarah, stay on the line.
I'm going to get you Ken Coleman's book.
find the work you're wired to do because that'll help in that in that mindset and i think it
could just be refreshing to you to have a level of grasp and control over your future but i'm so
sorry about all of this and we just pray that it's a smooth process for you from here on out
thanks for the call
Welcome back to The Ramsey Show in the Fairwinds Credit Union Studio.
I'm Rachel Cruz with Jade Worshaw.
And we're going to Gabrielle in Los Angeles, California.
Hi, Gabrielle.
Welcome to the show.
Hello, Jade.
Hello, Rachel.
It's Gabriel.
Sorry.
Oh, Gabriel.
Gosh, I'm sorry.
My bad.
Thank you, Gabriel, for the fix.
How can we help?
All right.
I was calling on.
half of my mom. She's 72. She's a widow who never remarried. Currently, she's retired.
She's active in her church, and she has a home that's almost paid off. It doesn't include
taxes and insurance, but lately she's been asking me for money. It started off small, but it's
starting to escalate. How can I help her protect her being independent, but also set up her
finances wisely for the future without becoming dependent on me or my siblings. Yeah, for sure. How old
are you? I'm 40. You're 40. Okay. And her house is almost paid off. Is she, is she still working?
She's not. Okay. So she's retired. Do you know, do you have any idea in numbers of what's in her
retirement? She's currently receiving, as far as her retirement savings, she does, I believe she's
exhausted them. Okay.
She's currently the only income coming in in is Social Security.
Do you know what that is?
I believe it was like 1,100, 1,300, possibly.
Oh, wow.
And do you know...
She's moving on the bare minimum.
Do you know what her mortgage is and what she has left on the mortgage in full?
So the mortgage currently outstanding balances around 100K.
Okay.
And then the mortgage payment is around, I'd say, 1450.
Oh, gosh.
Okay, well, yeah.
So...
How is she paying for every...
Right now I have my oldest sister who's living with her and I believe they're splitting the cost of the mortgage.
Okay. So they're half and half. Okay. So it's that's 700. And then everything else, I mean, is she able to pay for, is your sister splitting other bills? Do you know like electricity, water, all of that?
Yeah. So from what I understand is that my other siblings, she approaches each sibling individually and asks for help.
whether it's covering a bill
or a few dollars here and there
and it's for real needs
it's not for
yeah is she able-bodied to go to work
is she able to work
she is able-bodied
however she hasn't worked in some time
yeah that's so hard
I mean the reality is she either
yeah I mean if she has no money
and all she's getting is Social Security
it's not enough to your point
when taxes are due for proper
I mean, when she pays off the house, you know, she's going to have to pay for property tax and all that.
What's the home worth? I'm just curious if she were to sell it. If she were to sell it, what would it be worth?
Conservatively, probably about $1.1 million. It's a five-bedroom three bath.
As far as her renting up a room, that's also been thrown around, but I hate that for her.
It would require me involving myself.
Yeah.
I'm just wondering about, is there like a, go ahead.
I'm just wondering, because my head is at, she's 72, she's still fairly young and she's in good health.
She could live till 92, right?
So in my mind, I, as in my mind, I look at $1 million that she stands to take away from this.
And I go, okay, we can throw a decent amount and invest it.
that fund going and then maybe she can buy a condo for you know 250 or 300 I mean you're in
Los Angeles I don't know what's there what's possible can she buy something that's very small
just for her and then your sister goes and does her own thing because I'm also thinking what
happens if the sister moves out and gets married or moves on in life right so there's a lot of
variables here I'd love for her to get some hands on that money get some of it invested
and get some of it in a smaller, modest living space for her?
Yeah, I think that's what I envisioned for her.
I just don't know where to start.
I think if I do get the ball rolling, I'm seeing it through start to finish.
Yeah, yeah.
So where would I start?
Well, I would start with, is everybody in Los Angeles, like your whole family,
or do you have family that lives in less expensive areas of the country?
No, we're all basically based out of the Los Angeles area.
Okay. Have you looked at, or would you know, price ranges of, again, a very modest one-bedroom condo, that she could purchase.
One-bedroom, one-bath condo, purchase outright.
Possibly in the areas that were worrying, like around, oh, outskirts.
Well, yeah, because she's got to be able to afford it.
400. Okay. Okay. So then she could invest 500, you know.
Yeah. I'm not mad at that.
and get that ball rolling and then again if she's able to not pull from those investments and maybe for just three years work somewhere just to pay just the you know just mortgage i'm sorry not mortgage hopefully it's paid for yeah taxes taxes you know lights water food um and and just not touch that money as long as possible and let it grow and then live off of that because it's either going to be that or or you guys as as as grown kid adults
I'll have to say, okay, mom's not going to be able to afford this long term.
Are we going to be willing to support her in it?
So that would have to be a conversation that you guys have.
Will she sell?
Do you, I mean, if you imagine yourself bringing this up to her, what does that look like?
The last time that I brought up the conversation to her, it was emotional.
Yeah, for her.
For me, it's pretty straightforward.
I mean, the way that we're talking right now is the way that I talk with her.
And, you know, she's open to it.
but again she kind of pushes the work onto me so yeah and so do my siblings
do they kind of look to you your sisters too to say like what do you think um no they
they don't have an opinion as far as what she should do um they feel that you know it's our
home that we grew up in and that she should hold on to it and she's only got such and such
ways to go. Listen, there's no getting around the fact that this is emotional. Like,
I'm telling people all the time, that plays such a factor in how we manage the money. But if we look
at the numbers, the math is not emotional. She doesn't have any money. She doesn't have anything
and she's healthy. She has a lot of years ahead of her. So she's got to get to the point where
the discomfort, the discomfort of staying the same is more uncomfortable than changing, right? And
that's going to you're starting she's going to start to feel the cracks in that when you guys stop supplying
the money if that makes sense the more that you got and it's your choice but the more that you say okay
we'll float it will float it will float it will float it just know that it'll float through the yeah
for the next 20 years yeah so you guys have to kind of get on the same page of saying we can talk to
her about this but if she doesn't do it we have to allow her to feel it because when she feels it
is when she's going to realize, okay, I have a difficult choice to make.
And just try to support her as much as you can.
And it is emotional.
It is tough.
It's your family home.
There's nothing comfortable about that.
But the solution often lies outside the comfort zone.
So it sounds like my next steps might be like two part, right?
It's kind of initiating that conversation with my mom about selling the home, possibly.
And then as far as with my siblings, it's having that conversation.
If we're going to do this, we need to stop enabling her.
and giving your money, essentially.
Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, I mean, that's what I would do.
And even pull some options, you can even get in touch with one of our real estate pros.
Yeah, just to look for the area, like what's in the areas of where you guys are,
just different options condo-wise.
And, you know, there could be one a mile down so she doesn't have to move major locations, right?
Maybe it's just the actual home itself.
But run some numbers and kind of get some more facts around it.
But, yeah, this is difficult.
Hey, George Camel here, so you're thinking about buying or selling your home.
It's exciting, but there's a lot to think about, and all those decisions can feel overwhelming.
Well, here's the good news. You don't have to tackle the process alone.
Ramsey's real estate home base is the place to find all of your free tools and resources
for help to get prepared to buy or sell your home with confidence. You'll find calculators,
start-to-finish guides, a podcast, and even an in-depth video course hosted by yours truly.
What's not to love?
So if you're ready to take the next steps toward your home goals, go to ramsysolutions.com
slash real estate.
That's ramesysolutions.com slash real estate.
When it comes to debt or building wealth, people often can forget an important step when it
comes to reaching their goals. And that's having insurance and having the right coverage or too
little or too much can really impact how long it takes you to build wealth. So skimping on
insurance might feel like saving. But when life happens, it is not great because you may not
have a safety net that you need. And we don't want debt to be that safety net. So the right
insurance acts as a shield around your loved ones and your wallet if disaster strikes. And
some cases it can save you money if you're paying too much for insurance so how do you know if you
have the right coverage make sure to take the coverage checkup it's an online free resource that
creates a personalized insurance action plan for you that's unique to your situation and it makes
an overly confusing topic really easy to understand and gives you the next step specifically for you
and your situation so go to ramsysolutions.com slash checkup to take the coverage checkup or click
the link in the description if you are watching on YouTube or listening on podcast. Up next,
we have Derek in San Jose. Hi, Derek. Welcome to the show. Hey, Rachel. I'm a big fan and it's a real
honor to speak with you. Thanks so much for taking my call. Absolutely. Thanks for calling in. How can we
help? So I recently got engaged. My fiance and I are both 36 years old. We're looking to start
a Brady bunch. We've got five kids between 10 and 12, between us. Oh, wow. Between 10 and
between 10 and 12. Is that what you said? Yeah, I have twin sons who are 11, and she has a 10-year-old,
11-year-old, and 12-year-old. Oh, my gosh. That's going to be a houseful. That's fun. So great.
Yeah, it's been really fun. Yep. So the reason I'm calling is because we have a pretty large
difference in assets. And I think based on your advice, it would, the advice would be that we should
get a pre-up. So I have roughly $12 million, and she has roughly $1,000.
we started the process of looking into a pre-up and it's been an emotional one and I
totally understand why and I think especially like we went through a questionnaire talking together
about it but then when we got the first draft back from my lawyer that's when she's really not
been feeling good about it and I understand the concern so I mean she feels like I wouldn't be
fully entering the marriage in the same way that she is because it feels like I'm holding assets
like separately off to the side
and I'm sensitive to that
and especially in some of the contexts
of her former relationship
and so I'm just looking for maybe more clarity
and like what you guys would recommend.
Oh man, this is a hard one
because it is, I think it is a wise decision to do one
and I say that even more
I have a friend who's going through
not a great situation
and she came in with a lot more.
And now he's just, I mean, it's just messy.
It's messy, messy.
And there's a level, again, you're not, you're hoping and praying, obviously, that this is the one and that it's going to last a lifetime.
But as you guys have experienced, you know, there is a reality to all of this.
And whenever we, any of us get married, right?
I think there is like this like, okay, I'm choosing you for a reason and for a lifetime.
But we also don't live under a rock and know that things change.
in life and situations come up and unfortunately some really hard things happen and does cause
marriages to break up right to enter into divorce and we don't want that um so what were the part i'm
curious what were the parts of it that was making her because you guys went through a questionnaire
together and it didn't sound like the questionnaire brought up a lot of red flags but when she was
actually like reading it does she feel like she won't be taken care of of
something happens or like what's the what's that underlying that's a concern yeah yes and i think
especially like um you know her kids as well too and it's something that um i want to address
and i think we could address like in a will or um like some other document or method after
um we get married and it's something that i want to do like i absolutely would want her and her kids
to be taken care of too if something you know didn't happen to us i think it also
it feels very condescending to her
that either she
and I don't see it
being a problem for her at all
like my goal in this
and I think that's what your advice is
is that in our case
that I know it's rare
it would help protect our marriage
and that's what I want to do
but I totally understand
that she feels it's condescending
like to her
maybe her and her family and her friends
that they might be a problem
and if we would need this to like protect
against them. Can I ask how, how, like, stringent this pre-nup is, like, how strict it is?
Because when I've heard calls about this before, my question is always, is there a way that this
can be more progressive, that over, maybe over time and over years, some of the restrictions
fall off? Like, does that make sense to where it's like, the longer we're together? And the more
that this feels right, some of this starts to fall off, and now we start to become one.
And after a while, it's all gone, and we are one? Is there anything built in like that?
So there's nothing currently built in like that. So other than that, it's pretty basic.
So everything we enter into the marriage with is separate property, except she has a small
amount of debt, and she's been awesome about eliminating debt, especially the situation she came
from. I don't want her to carry at all, like I would just pay it off. And then,
everything after the date of the marriage is shared.
So income that I make or she made, we just share it.
Our plan is that she would stop working.
She'd be able to be home with all these kids.
Does that include interest on the $12 million, like as that grows?
Or does any growth on that $12 million remain yours?
Yeah, so at least as it's currently structured,
the growth in that would remain mine.
I think we have talked about it's not in the document,
but like if I were to stop working to also help with the kids,
which would be an option, like that,
the income that we drew from that would be considered our income.
I think I would, yeah, I'd be wondering about that if I were entering in that marriage.
Like, how can we protect what you've already created, but how can I be a player and how that grows
from here on out?
Like, how can I be a part of that?
I think I might be wondering about that.
That's tough, man.
Yeah, and then the only other additional part is we're planning to get a house and I was just
going to buy the house.
we title it in both of our names,
I just consider a community property.
Yeah.
Yeah, well, it sounds like you're being very gracious about this, Derek.
I think it's such a hard line to be wise in a situation and being,
I mean,
you don't sound like you're drawing these crazy hard lines and you know what you mean
and you're pushing it.
Like, it's your tone feels very humble and gracious,
which I, yeah, I mean, I think she probably very much appreciates.
so yeah i'm trying to think if i were in her position which you never can fully do for somebody
you know there's a part of me that i don't know i think i would understand you're coming in
with 12 million and i understand that's not mine right now right like there's i don't know yeah this
one's hard for me i i see are you an are you an anti pre-nup no i'm not i would not go that far i
think it's just it's it's it is a very tough way to start out in marriage clearly yes because
we're dividing yours versus mine yeah and everything else in the marriage is out is we say we
us our so it it is tough and if you're a person let's you know I'll put myself in the shoes
uh me I've always viewed oh when you enter a marriage it's like this yes you don't know who
you're going to fall in love with and that person happens to be loaded and now suddenly you're
like, oh, this picture I had of it being ours is not possible. That's just tough. I'm not saying
it's wrong. It's just tough. Yeah, yeah. Well, and I think too, Derek, I think it's too, I think it can
feel like the 12 million's off in this corner and it's never, we're never going to participate
in it. But I think it comes into its mine if something happens. But up until that point,
it's ours. Like we're sharing assets. That's a good point. That is a very good point. We are living
our lives together as one, but for some reason, if something ever happened in a divorce,
this part still goes back to me. Does that make sense? I wonder if framing it.
That's a good way to frame it because that actually... Because it can be hers, right? Like,
you guys can share on this. It's the only time it's not hers is if you guys legally go through a
divorce. Does that make sense? Yeah. Yeah, it totally makes sense. And that is how we want to live
going into the... Yeah. And it sounds like that's... Yeah. And that sounds like your attitude because
you're going to take some of our money and we're going to buy a house together with this money
and use this money for our family. So I think it's such a fine line, Derek. I mean, it's so hard.
But I think I would keep and bring in a third party. If there's a great marriage counselor
or therapist, honestly, it's something to think through and even get other opinions because, yeah,
you want to be on the same page with this.
Hey, do you ever feel like you're doing everything right?
with money, but still stuck? I was you. In debt, running hard but taking three steps forward and two
steps back. Turns out, it's not the numbers. It's the fact that changing our ways with money is
emotional. That's why I wrote my brand new book, what no one tells you about money, to help you
push past what's really been sabotaging your progress so you can finally win. You can pre-order now
and score over $100 in free bonus items, but only if you order by January 5th, go to ramsysysolutions.com
slash store today.
The all new
every dollar is here
and it is way more than just the incredible budgeting app that it is.
It now has tons of advanced features
to help you make progress.
with your money so much faster. And the average person is finding thousands of dollars in
margin in just the first 15 minutes. So get every dollar for free starting today. Just get it in
the app store or Google Play. All right, let's go to Alex in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Hey, Alex,
welcome to the show. Hi there. Thanks so much for taking my call. Absolutely. So I am,
I'm 28 and debt free. I'm looking to buy a tiny house to put on my parents' property without a
credit score now, and a tiny house technically not qualifying for a mortgage, how do I go about
getting a loan for it? Well, let's talk about the loan process, and then we'll talk about the
tiny house on your parents' property. So with the loan process, if you have no credit score,
you're just going to have to find a place that does manual underwriting for that. Now,
we would recommend Churchill mortgage. There are companies that do that, and you just have to check
and make sure they'll do it in your area. But it's the same process. You're just going to have
show different trade lines. You're going to have to show your pay subs. You're going to have to
show proof of income. If you work for yourself, you're going to have to show your tax returns,
that sort of thing. But for the most part, the process is the same. But you're saying it doesn't
qualify for a mortgage because it's a tiny house? Correct. Yeah. So if it's under 400 square feet,
I'm looking at 15 square feet. It doesn't qualify for a mortgage. What's the cost of it?
I'm looking at about 40 to 50,000. Oh, we'll save up and pay for it, Alex.
I'm sorry?
Save up and pay for it.
It's like a car.
Right now I only have about $10,000.
Okay.
Well, then just wait a little bit.
Yeah.
So just be putting some money aside to $3,000 a month and just work your way up and probably, you know, 12, 18 months.
Then you can do it.
Can I ask the long-term strategy on this?
Yeah.
So I have autism and I can't really live independently.
So it's pseudo-independent being on my parents' property.
got you got you okay what are you doing for work um i coordinate volunteers for hospice cool
are your parents involved at all Alex in this process would they be able to help you
not financially no but they've been a great support okay okay great how long did it take you
to save up the 10,000 um i just finished i got debt free in February and then saved up like 6,000 for
my emergency fund. And it's so, I don't know, last six months. Okay. Yeah, I'm with Rachel. Just
keep saving for this. It seems like you've thought through the best way for you to live. And I like
that you've thought through that. I don't think you need to go into debt for this. And for anybody who
is listening to my zero score spiel, that's for. People that are trying to do a full mortgage on zero
credit score. But yeah, save up for it. I like the 40 to 50,000.
just understand that you that this is yours like the resale on this virtually doesn't exist because
it's on your parents property and this is money that you'll likely never get back um yes so understanding
that is important i'd say yep yeah so running the yeah i mean so it will um are you able to pick up
extra work Alex yeah i'm looking for a second part-time job okay good for you you sound incredible
I mean, the fact, I mean, you're very ambitious, you're very well-spoken, you know what you want, you've been doing the baby steps, you've been debt-free, got your fully funded emergency fund. I mean, you're literally doing it all. The only thing that's going to suck is like the next probably three years of saving for this, you know what I mean? You just look at it like, you know, and people want to save up for a car. They want to save up for a college education, right? And these numbers, these are big numbers. I'm definitely not downplaying that. It's just, so it's going to just take you longer to do it. And even though I guess tech,
technically, you know, I guess you could Ramsey, you know, go through it to say, well,
but a mortgage is the one type of debt, and this is for a house.
Could figure out a way to do it.
But the fact that it's, the fact that there is no resale, because the one reason we do say
a mortgage, not only is because it is the most expensive thing that you're ever going to
purchase as a home, but also homes go up in value over time. And this is more like a car,
in a sense, where it's going to go down in value. And so getting into debt, even a personal
loan for this, financially would not be wise. So it really would be you putting money aside.
And I mean, I don't know about the market in tiny homes. Is there, can you, can you buy or buy used
ones? Can you buy a used one? Yeah, that's what I'm looking at. I'm looking at them on like Facebook
marketplace. Okay, okay. So maybe you could even, Alex, I don't know, because for some people,
they may want it off their property. There may be some urgency to get one off. So maybe you could even
negotiate with them and say, hey, if I have cash, you know, what's the lowest? You wouldn't be able
to do that today because you don't have that amount. But when you're getting closer to that
in, you know, three years or something, I mean, you may be able to negotiate. Okay. For a lower
price. Yeah. Absolutely, Alex. Yep. Thanks for the call. And I again, I think, yeah, I just wouldn't do
I wouldn't go to debt routes. I wouldn't either. And because you never know, especially if you're
already buying it used. Yes. What type of resale would be. Yeah. On maybe,
you know selling it in the future yeah absolutely all right let's go to elijah in salt lake city hi elijah
welcome to the show hey how's it going um i just have a question i am 22 years old um i'm currently
going to college right now um i've always done with my bachelor's degree i have only about a year left
um i'm only about 14 000 in student loan debt so almost done but yeah that's my only debt no credit
card debt, nothing, no car loan, nothing like that.
And I guess my question is, well, I'm looking to go into law enforcement after I graduate.
I guess my question is, is it worth it to stay for a master's degree if I get an actual
like pay incentive for the rest of my career or if I should just, once I get my bachelor's degree,
take that pay incentive and just start working?
Well, what would it cost you to get your master's?
How would you pay for it?
So that one would be, it would be loans.
but it would be for a total
about master's degree
I've been doing my research
about 18,000 for the college
that I'd be going to.
And what's the difference
in job that you would get
if you just went into the police department
with a bachelor's versus a master's?
Yeah, so if I went in with a bachelor's degree,
I'd be getting a 3% pay incentive
for the rest of my career.
If I went in with a master's degree,
I'd be getting 5% pay incentive.
So I guess my question is
it would take a long time to repay that,
like get that money worth
with that extra 2% every year.
but I do really enjoy college.
I do want to get married before I leave college and I, you know, enjoy my hobbies.
So I just don't know if it makes financial sense to get a master's degree.
Not on debt.
Not on debt, but I'm wondering if there's a way that you can cash flow at all.
And my next question is, do you have to do it right away or can you work on it later while you're in law enforcement and still get the 5% bump?
Yeah, you can still get the 5% bump.
I've just heard from a lot of people that, you know, it's really hard once you're starting this full-time job to go back.
Yeah. I mean, how much are you getting paid, like, your first year that you're working?
So, yeah, first year, if with a bachelor's degree, would be about 90K.
Okay.
And then with a master's degree, if I came in first year, it would be about 95.
Okay.
So that's my thing is that the percentage-wise is not big.
I mean, we're talking maybe a $4,000 difference, and you could do that in two months with a side gig.
You know what I mean?
And like, so there's a part of me, and I know, I mean, we have friends in law enforcement,
and they even move around, they get up to detective or they, you know, move around within it.
Yeah.
That can change your pay over time as well.
So, yeah, I think if you had the money and you wanted to do it, I don't think, I mean,
I don't think I would stop you.
But also, since you don't have the money, it's kind of, that's a no-go for me, personally.
Okay, yeah.
So you would just, you would, okay, so you wouldn't be, okay,
with, you know, taking out student loans for the master's degree?
No.
Okay.
Yeah, I'd get this paid off and, man, I wish we had a Ramsey dating app because I feel like
we had a lot of calls of some ladies that are always single, Elish, and they're always
looking for a man, and we could have pointed them your way.
I know, I know.
No, I appreciate the, uh, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the,
the, the, the, the, the, because I do think that's great.
It's, I am for getting married young and, you know, you know, and what
he said it's true. Like, when you're in college, there's people right there to choose from. Once you get out in the world, it's like, I got to work. I got to go out after hours. It's exhausting. It's absolutely exhausting. I got to go to an event, get dressed up. College, it's like you got your pick right there. Got them right there. Oh, Elijah. Yeah. I hope that helps. So, yeah, if there's not the cash, but to Jade's point, if you're able to somehow cash flow, or even if you get into a situation where they help pay for half of it, I don't know, your work, that would be incredible.
too. So I hope that helps. And, yeah, good luck.
Everywhere you turn right now, you're being told right now. You're being told a lie
about money, that you can't get ahead, that you can't survive without debt.
And those lies are keeping you broke.
Don't buy into it.
Yes, there's a lot of noise and chaos and confusion out there, but there's also hope.
The truth is, you have more control than you think.
This year, it's time to take back your hard-earned money and your life, and it starts
by joining our free live stream.
On January 8th, me and Jade Warshot will show you how to go from chaos to clarity
with your money. Help you break free from debt and change your family tree, all by using
the all-new Every Dollar app. Plus 10 people who sign up will win $2,000 cash. Don't let this be
another year of I Can't. Sign up for free at every dollar.com slash live stream.
Our scripture of the day comes from Philippians 3, 13 through 14.
One thing I do, forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead.
I press toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Jesus Christ.
Booker T. Washington said,
You measure the size of the accomplishments by the obstacles you have to overcome to reach your goals.
That's good.
That's really good.
Love it, love it.
All right.
Up next, we have Jacob in Grand Rapids.
Hi, Jacob.
Welcome to the show.
How are you doing?
Thank you for having me.
Absolutely.
Recently in this year, I've had a change in my whole money, and it's really been having, you know,
$3,000 in a checking account for emergency, putting everything else towards a high-yield savings
account or cash plus account to some banks.
And then, you know, maxing out my route to IRA as much as I can,
year as well as, you know, traditional brokerage investments. But it really got me thinking,
it's like, can you live with these cash plus accounts or high-yield savings accounts, considering
that they accept direct deposits and bill pay and, you know, you can deposit checks? Can you
only live with using a high-yield saving account with a credit card? And if so, like, what's
a disadvantage with that without going through, you know, your traditional local bank or even
your commercial bank, like the bigger ones, right? Yeah, well, from a high-yield perspective,
usually you have a limit on how many withdrawals you can have.
So you can't use it like a full checking account.
Sometimes they have a limit of five is what I see most of the time.
But yeah, you will get a debit card and a checkbook with that.
So you can take money out of it.
But you can't, I mean, if you think about, you know, the expense.
I just think about my every dollar app.
And when I open it, it's like 15 transactions, you know.
And it's like an am.
Amazon, an Amazon, grocery, Netflix.
I mean, so you have a lot of transactions coming out that will not,
it'll exceed the limit of most high-yield savings accounts.
I see.
Yep.
So there really isn't much as long as, you know,
whatever company you go with,
making sure they don't have those limits and whatnot,
or a high-yield at least.
Well, they do.
They will.
Yeah.
A high-yield usually does have a limit of how many withdrawals.
you can have per month.
Yeah, so a traditional checking out.
Now, I will say, Jacob, there are some,
and we're actually kind of in talks with one right now,
possibly for the Ramsey Show.
There are now banks that are offering a higher percentage rate,
maybe like a 2 to 3% for checking.
Just a normal checking.
Yeah, which is great versus I think our checking's like less than 1% or something.
I don't think we basically get anything from it.
So there may be some more on the market that are great.
It wouldn't be considered a high-yield savings.
It would be considered a checking account.
but there are some banks that are offering, usually online banks,
are offering more of a higher interest rate on just a traditional checking account.
So that's something you could look into if you wanted to.
No, that is true.
I've been seeing that with a lot of banks.
Like, I'm looking at one, like it's Vanguard.
That's the one I was looking at.
It is labeled a cash plus account.
So it might not be a high yield.
I guess that's where my kind of question, or to myself, is a bit confusing.
But the main motivation behind it is, you know, making my money work for me,
right and making sure that it's not fitting and you know yeah for sure but i would say the account
that the money you have in your checking or the way i look at it jacob is that money's sitting
there not to make me money it's to keep my life afloat i mean that that in my investments
are there to make money for me just like you're saying my high yield savings it's there for a
little bit of that bridge mentality of like we have a lot you know we we had a good amount of money
in our high yield because we were building a pool so we were writing some checks out of it
throughout this past year.
But I'd rather it sit in a high-yield savings
versus a checking account,
but yet I know my high-yield savings
is not where I'm going to make a ton of money.
That's not why it's there.
It's fine to have it sit there some savings
because it will make more than a checking account.
But I look at, for me, my investments
from retirement, Winston, I have a separate mutual fund,
and then we also have some real estate.
So I look at those as where my money makes money,
not necessarily my high-yield savings or my checking.
So I wonder if from your mentality perspective, Jacob,
to kind of like loosen that a little bit
and maybe put some more like emotional parameters
around these accounts.
I think so.
It's also about the habits you're forming.
Like when you tell me that,
I'm thinking you're building the habit of I have a block of savings
and I can pull from that block of savings for normal every day.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
As opposed to when you're checking accounts and your checking account,
I only use this for a day-to-day search.
you know, day-to-day purchases.
And my savings over here,
I only touch it if it's an emergency.
And this H-Y-S-A, I only,
you do what I'm saying?
So you're building those habits.
And when you blur the lines like that,
I think also to Rachel's point,
it just, I think it causes confusion.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Personally.
But, yeah, I wouldn't do it.
There are definitely worse things you could do.
Right.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, for sure.
For sure.
I wouldn't do it.
Yeah.
Does that help?
Yeah.
That's where, no, it definitely does help.
And, you know,
that's where I'm going eventually. I have money set aside. I mean, a little background for an
investment property, a multifamily unit. And it's just been sitting in, you know, I think like a 0.1%. So I was
like, you know, I got to move this. Yes, for sure. And I would say this to buy a property. Yeah,
and I would say this too, Jacob, if that, I love that real estate goal for you. And if it's going to be
longer than five years, you could even drop that in the SMP 500 through Vanguard if you wanted.
There you go. If it's longer than five years, you could invest it. It's going to go up.
and down, it's not going to be as steady as just a high yield savings, but high yield savings
you're only going to get 4 to 5%. Now, if it's less than five years, I wouldn't probably risk
it putting in the market. But if you know it's going to be longer than five years, you could
drop part of it, you know, maybe not all of it, maybe some of it, maybe all of it, into just
the S&P. Yeah, that is very smart because it compounds and it's
good performance. Yeah, for sure. So again, that answer my question. Okay. Perfect. Well,
thanks for the call. Jacob. You're a sharp guy.
sharp young guy
sharp young man
to be able to be thinking about
about all of this
which is great
so again you guys
just to kind of like
clear that up
you know you want to have
your checking
you want to have some
savings and we love a high yield
or a money market account
but in that you're going to have
your emergency funds
some short term savings
that you're looking towards
once you're debt free
and have your fully funded emergency fund
maybe your down payment
you're saving up for
could go in the high yield
and then beyond that
be investing
and retirement is your number one
priority with investing
15% of your income
and we'll go into that. And that's Roth IRAs,
401Ks, 403Bs.
Now, I keep my,
I keep my emergency,
like Sam and I keep our emergency fund in one high yield.
And then we keep another high yield for, like,
renovation, like things like that. Is that what you do?
I just like it over there.
Yes, that's how I am.
That's how I am.
I'm like, don't count that.
Like, I like to forget it's even.
I know. And I'm such the free spirits,
even though I'm like, talk about money
every day for my job. And I'm always like,
hey babe out of all their accounts like well how much is in this and he like gives me the number I'm like
that's not including the emergency fund is like no it's not including the emergency but never include
the emergency fund I'm like I just can't even like emotionally yep go there but but yeah those are those are
some great questions and you know we were um the high yield savings the returns have gone down a little
bit we saw them they're they're crazy they're like 5.5 at one point it was wild wild wild so that's
always a thing to remember too in the economy when interest rates go up it's bad when you're in debt
because you're having to pay that interest.
But when you're earning the interest,
yeah, it might be, might be great.
All right, let's go to TikTok real quick.
We'll close up the show with a little TikTok.
I love that.
We got Brian, and he said,
because of your show, we're living the dream.
We're tired early and traveling the country in our RV
and we can't stop saving and eating cheaply.
How can we eat steaks, rip, seafood without guilt?
I thought that's that without a grill.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Basically, how do you enjoy life on baby step?
I think they're on seven.
I think they're done.
They are living a dream.
So I'll give you my framework for like, so basically they're feeling guilty about their spending. Is that what they're saying? Okay. They have the money. So I love this because Sam and I sometimes feel the same way. Like whenever you've gone through a struggle and you've sacrificed to win, you do, it's like, oh, like you're afraid you're going to mess it all up, right? And so here's what, five pillars of personal finance. Go, Jade. Here we go. And if you check the boxes, then you're a financially responsible adult. Love it. So number one, are you living on a budget? Okay. Green check.
ding number two are you person who is living out of debt like you're out of debt you don't have a
ding check that box if you're i carry the proper insurances do i have the proper insurances yes
check that box am i a person who's saving for the future am i doing you know my 15% to retirement
am i doing the 529 am i investing in my you know for savings account through my home ding and am
i prioritizing giving if you're green checking all those boxes permission to spend to use your phrase
some life. I love it. I love it. I hope that helps Brian. Enjoy the RV life. The retired life,
that is. I love it. Oh, thanks to all the guys in the booth for helping out Jade. Thanks for the
great hour. And remember to take control of your money and create a life you love.
You know,
