The Ramsey Show - App - Your Past Shouldn't Affect Your Hope for the Future (Hour 3)

Episode Date: May 14, 2020

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Live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions, broadcasting from the Dollar Car Rental Studios, it's the Dave Ramsey Show, where debt is dumb, cash is king, and the paid-off home mortgage has taken the place of the BMW as the status symbol of choice. Ramsey Personality and Ramsey Personality named Ken Coleman is my co-host this hour. Thank you for joining us, Ken. He is the host of the Ken Coleman Show and answers questions and writes books and coaches people all day long on the subject of getting a job and getting in the career field that you want to do. Open phones as we take your calls about jobs and careers and money this hour here on the Dave Ramsey Show.

The phone number is 888-825-5225. That's 888-825-5225. Marcos starts off this hour in Texas. Hey, Marcos, how are you? I'm doing good, Dave. How about yourself? Better than I deserve. What's up?

Well, I recently got engaged. Congratulations. Thank you. Me and my future fiancé, or my fiancé, future wife, we have some student loan debt, and we are in the process of looking for a home. Now, by the end of this month, I will have my student loan paid off, and we will, after mine are paid off, we are looking to pay off hers.

Now, for this process, I was wondering what would be the best course of action in looking for a home budget-wise and money-wise for us? What would be to get – I want a nice home for her and for us and, you know, for our future kids that we'll have. So what would be the best course of action? Very nice. Well, good man. Well, I'd like for you to get a home, too.

I want you to do it in a proper order so that the home doesn't get you. And, you know, let's keep it going that way. You should not pay off someone's debt that you're not married to. So she shouldn't pay on your debt. You shouldn't pay on hers until you're married. When's the wedding? In September. Good.

Okay. And how much student loan debt will she have left in September if she pays only on hers? About $35,000. Okay. And yours will be gone by then? Yes. I will have mine paid off by the end of this month. It's only $3,000 left.

Good for you. Okay. And what do you make?'s only $3,000 left. Good for you. Okay. And what do you make? Roughly $75,000 a year. Good. What does she make? $30,000. Good.

Okay. So you're going to have $100,000 household income, $105,000 when you get married in September. You have $35,000 of student loan debt plus whatever you have in savings that you put in savings between now and September. Does that sound like the right idea? Yes. Come home from the honeymoon, combine your finances, throw the money you've saved onto the student loan. Let's finish up the student loan debt.

Then let's build an emergency fund of three to six months of expenses, and then let's start saving for our down payment. It sounds like you're probably buying a house a year to 18 months after you're married, which by the way is a good idea anyway. It takes about a year of marriage to know how close to your mother-in-law to buy. Well, we do have car loans as well. Oh, okay. We got to get those cleared up. I want you debt-free with an emergency fund plus a down payment and marry it a year before you buy but i think it's going to take you a year so you're going to be okay okay yeah how old are you guys uh i'm 21 and she is 24 okay you're going to be just fine

so you know when you're 26 and 23 you're going to own a house and be debt free and have an emergency fund in place that Does that sound good? That sounds perfect for me. Thank you, Dave, so much. But don't buy a house quickly while you've still got these car loans around your neck because your broke friends are telling you to buy a house. Here's the other thing couples don't think about, Dave, is they buy a house and the houses have problems and that costs more money.

You're living in a nice apartment enjoying just being married and figuring out how to just live and do life together before you take on those additional expenses stacy and i were in apartment for two and a half years uh saving up money before we ever bought our first tiny house we were renting for two plus years before we bought our first place yeah yeah and that's and we were about your age guy so you're right on track marcos you're a good man hey hang on i'm gonna send you a copy of the book, The Total Money Makeover, to help you guys work through these things together. David is with us in Ohio.

David, your question for Ken. Hello, sir. Thank you for taking my call. Sure. I am one of those crazy people called a bivocational pastor. Love it. people called it bivocational pastor love it um uh the little church the pastor is got about 20 people currently 30 on a good day and um i just it's been almost a year that i've been there and my wife and i have just had a little newborn baby the first uh the fourth of this year. Well, congratulations.

So we had a whole bunch of extra things on our plate. And we just started getting into the whole Dave Ramsey scenario, started listening to Brother Dave about a year ago, and did Dave Ramsey-ish for a while. And finally, after the baby was born, it's like, all right, this is it. We've got to do something drastic. So we've been digging ourselves out of debt with the biggest shovel we can find. And we're doing very well.

We'll be out of debt by the end of this year if everything keeps on going well. Good. How can we help today? The problem is I am known as a very passionate person that kind of scares people sometimes, especially people of the church. And our treasurer there has been there probably as long as anybody else has, and he has seen some very horrible things happen, unfortunately, in the church's history. And he's done all he can to hold things together and all. And with my crazy passion coming into the scenario, there's a few things that I've recommended to help save the church money and cut corners here and there, which he has been very appreciative of.

And, I mean, I set up a thermometer, you know, to pay off the church mortgage. That was completed last year. Everybody's excited about that. But there seems to be kind of a disconnect. I slowly gain enough either trust or whatever in order to not let people think that I'm like the other preachers that have been there before, that have taken advantage of the church. Well, the first thing you need to do is, if you're not already aware, what did those former pastors do? What was the source of the problem that created this lack of trust? And I think you're probably aware of that, but it's a good idea to start with reminding yourself what

they did. And so that, you know, Hey, we've got some people that are reeling or that are, they're a little bit scared because they've been hurt in these areas. And so that means you're going to have to build up high levels of trust in those areas. So that means, and I think you're, I think you've actually nailed the problem because you've confessed at least twice on this call that you're really, really passionate and you're a hard charger. And I certainly understand that. So what you're going to have to do is realize that you're going to have to slow your pace down in certain areas.

And yet you can still be consistent. But the way that I would be consistent with what you believe needs to happen until those people can get on board is to cast vision the right way. Andy Stanley is a good friend of Dave and I's, and he's got a wonderful book called Visionary, and I'd buy it and read it. But he basically gives a three-part formula from the book of Nehemiah. Share what the problem is, share what the solution to the problem is, and give a reason for the solution. That's how you cast vision. I think that's the way to start, Dave. It's a good way to start.

I'm going to send you a copy of Chris Hogan's kit on studying the disc personality styles, and I think that'll help you in the process as well. So hold on, Kelly. I'll pick up and we'll send that out to you. This is The Dave Ramsey Show. show. Folks, I love telling you about well-made, well-thought-out products. Today, I'm talking about Grip6 belts. I don't know about you, but I'm not a fan of traditional belts. They never fit right, and they're uncomfortable. Grip6 belts are unique. Owner BJ designed a truly modern, minimalist belt made of high-quality materials

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That's GRIP6.com. My co-host this hour, Ramsey personality, Ken Coleman of the Ken Coleman Show, jobs and career expert on the Ken Coleman Show every day on Sirius XM and about 40 radio stations and a podcast all around America. Number one bestselling book, The Proximity Principle. Are you stuck in a job you hate? Did you recently lose your job in this pandemic?

Maybe you're looking for something new, but you now understand you have 33 million other people out there trying to get a job too, so the competition just went up in this job market. If you answered yes to any of those questions, we launched today for Ken Coleman our new live stream event coming up Thursday, May the 21st

at 7 o'clock Central Time. It's a one-night digital event. Ken Coleman's going to teach you how to build a killer resume that'll get you noticed get you everything you need to know to nail the interview process and how to seal the deal in your follow-up conversations after the interviews it's called get hired it's a live stream event get hired thursday may the 21st at 7 p.m. It's on sale starting today.

Already over 1,000 tickets sold. Tickets are just $10 and can be purchased at DaveRamsey.com slash events. $10. Get hired. It's a live stream event. Thursday, May the 21st, 7 p.m. Central Time. You will not get this kind of information if you paid thousands of dollars somewhere else. Absolutely incredible.

Ken, this thing has exploded. It's going to be a huge digital happening. Yeah, we're really excited about it because this is not just for the folks who have been displaced because of the coronavirus. This is also for people who want to switch and people who are coming out of high school or college and want to get into the workforce. It really is the secret sauce to how to get noticed so that you can get hired. And we're going to prepare you, equip you, and also you're going to walk out of this event very encouraged. And I would really recommend if you've got some friends or family members that need this information, it's $10. This is a great gift to give them the nudge. And all you need is an internet connection and a device, and we're going to bring it to you right here from our beautiful atrium. It's going to be a great event and a lot

of goodies that you're going to get with the ticket price. Not just the information, but we're going to send you a lot of great information that you will put into practice after we've taught you that night. So really valuable and proud of the team for putting this together so quickly. You know, maybe this time has been really, really rough for you. I've been there myself and other times, and I know how it feels. And sometimes one of the things that will help you get your hope back is just a clear path where you can see a way out of the tunnel and you see a light that's not an oncoming train. And when the light at the end of the tunnel is not an oncoming train

because you've got a clear path, a step-by-step proven game plan, that's what Ken has for you in these employment situations. It's called Get Hired, May the 21st, and it's $10, and you can get your tickets at DaveRamsey.com slash events. Mitchell is with us in Iowa. Hi, Mitchell. Welcome to the Dave Ramsey Show. Thanks, Dave. How are you? Better than I deserve. How can I help? So I graduated from college last year. I'm 25. I work as a speech therapist in the schools, and currently I'm living at home. I graduated with $70,000 in student loan debt, and through living at home, I've been able to work the baby steps and get that down to $45,000.

Good for you. I just picked up a side hustle. I worked at through grad school at a winery working there, and I was just hired on as a PRN or as-needed speech therapist with a couple of nursing homes near me. Wonderful. My question is, do, in your opinion, is it time for me to move out and fend for myself, or should I stay at home another year get these student loans almost completely eliminated if not completely gone and then go there's not a wrong answer there um the year is about the max i would do um okay you know i don't want to be out there too long um there is tremendous emotional mental health benefit to paying your own bills

and being on your own. And you're a go-getter. You've gone out there, got the side hustles going, man. You're not afraid of working. You're a mature, good young man. So you're not doing anything wrong. Obviously, your relationship with your parents is good uh you didn't tell me there's a toxic problem you have the option of staying there without a lot of discomfort which is good that's a wonderful thing too to have a family that's that functional um and so you know if you stay i wouldn't do it you know i probably wouldn't stay one month more than a year that's about it that's about my limit at your age i just wouldn't want to hang out there um uh and so uh you might even split the difference you know and say you know i'm gonna almost get out and then move out and finish up my debt when i move out because basically what it

does is just slows down your cost of rent uh whatever you're whatever you're paying whatever they're paying now which would be be rent, maybe lights and water, maybe some food, is the only difference. And so, you know, it might slow you down by $1,000 a month. So we're talking $6,000 if you moved out in six months that it slowed you down, something like that, I don't know. But, you know, I would not do a two-year plan. I think the benefit, the financial benefit is overtaking the emotional benefit when you start to go too long.

What do you think, Ken? Yeah, my curiosity is twofold. One, Dave, he's flushing this out. How much longer would it take you to pay it off is what you've got to look at there if you were to go out and live on your own. And then the second thing is, are you tempted? You know, if he's tempted to stay there longer, then I think you're right. But if he's going, you know what, this is just to allow me to be gazelle intense, then I'm actually fine with it.

And this is a guy, you know, I love the way he poised the question. He said, should I get out and fend for myself? I'm like, you're working three jobs, man. You're fending for yourself. You are not a stay at home, you-home loser in the basement playing video games. This is a young man who is focused, and so I'm actually fine with it because I think I don't sense him saying, you know, I could get comfortable and never leave. I think that's what you're getting at.

Well, it's not only that, but I noticed, I mean, I had one of our kids come and live with us after college, which was fine. We love them, and we have great relationships with all of them. And only there about three months, which was fine. And different financial situation. Got a roommate, moved out, and we just noticed a change in her when she was paying her own bills. And she was never a person that was not a hard worker anyway she's always been a hard worker incredible work ethic and mature didn't have any issues with any of that

there was no but there was just a little different swagger no question you're right a little different way to carry yourself and so and i've noticed that with grown kids of my friends as well and so i just encourage young people to get out as soon as is reasonable and you know so a year or a little less is reasonable in my mind here listening to this yeah i agree with you 100 this is a sharp young man by the way if i if i sensed you were soft and you were kind of screwing around you're acting like you're 14 years old and your mommy's still cooking your favorite chocolate chip cookies on saturday morning or something if i if i smelled that i would push you out right now.

But I don't smell that. Instead, I smell what you're seeing, Ken, which is a sharp young dude who's a go-getter. And so that's very, very cool. So, hey, man, that's a good question. There's a lot of that out there. And, you know, Rachel and I wrote the book Smart Money, Smart Kids together. And one of the things we said in there is, you know, an eagle that stays in the nest too long is called a turkey. And, you know, we've got these – we went through a portion of a generation here

that got a real bad stereotype of being the – you know, living in my mama's basement playing video games and got a participation trophy. That is not true of all of these people sometimes they had a uh you know bad marriage and them and the baby moved back and so mom and dad's house can be a safety net but it doesn't need to be a hammock yeah i think you're right you know you know the other thing and this is not happening here but parents as your listeners because i'm sitting there looking through the looking through the lens dave of what you're saying and i've got a 14 year old a 12 year old and 11 year old and i'm looking at that and i'm heeding what you're saying, and I've got a 14-year-old, a 12-year-old, and an 11-year-old, and I'm looking at that, and I'm heeding that advice.

You're kicking them out. I know what you're doing. No, but I want to be careful that I don't try to hold them in. Parents, be careful. Right, right. The nudge is the very thing they need at times, and I think that's what I take away. The eagle takes the... That's it.

They build the thorns facing in in the nest, and they pull the down out, and the thorns make it uncomfortable to stay in the nest. Yeah, that's beautiful. That's the eagle. It's a great analogy. The eaglets push out. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Business leaders now more than ever, we need people with the right skills to support our communities, especially the frontline workers who provide resources and care for those most in need.

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or if you're in another industry and have hiring needs, visit linkedin.com slash Ramsey. LinkedIn.com slash Ramsey. Terms and conditions apply Coming up on three weeks ago, the governor of Tennessee opened up the state of Tennessee in all but six counties. And we had one week where our team could rejoin us here. They've been working from home, and they could join us back in the building as a volunteer. Then last Monday, a week ago Monday, we came back, all of us, and then this Monday begins our second week, all of us being here. Sure is good to be back with people again,

and of course we're taking all the normal precautions and so forth, and lots of CDC cleaning and so forth. And then this last Monday we opened up the lobby to the public. And so we've got folks in here from outside of our company for the first time in about eight weeks now, something like that, this week. And it sure is good to have that. The lobby is full right now because a whole bunch of our team members are not working at

their desks uh they are out here to celebrate uh taylor and stephanie shivers are here uh one of our team members to do their own debt-free scream right here on the debt-free stage six years with us and you're debt-free awesome man yeah we're excited i love it how much have you paid off we've paid off 140 000 how long did this take 26 months 26 months okay and we don't ask your income because you're on your team on the team and all the team members are standing around and we don't want them to know your business but pretty cool so what kind of debt was 140 000 it was mostly student loans uh we had about 5 000 in medical debt as well okay all right cool all right now i'm a little bit confused you've been here six years yeah how come you just started getting out of debt two years ago i mean that's a that's a great question that is a

great question because i'm a math guy and i'm wondering inquiring minds want to know if i don't ask it some bozo on twitter i'll ask it so i might as well yeah we had uh we had baby step one done baby step two we were making minimum payments we just we couldn't make uh couldn't make any traction okay so you just were not in the uh you weren't in you didn't have the margin to do it right okay okay that makes sense all right so if we were to reveal your income, it would reveal the answer. Thus. Yes.

So again, what kind of debt was the $140,000? Student loans and then just a little bit of medical debt. Okay, all right. Wow. Very cool. Very cool. Okay, so what started this process? Did it start six years ago when you joined us or start before that?

Well, we did FPU when we first got married over about eight years ago is when we completed FPU. Okay. And so we budgeted early on in our marriage. But there came a point a couple of years ago when Taylor sat me down and he was like, babe, we've got to talk about how much money we actually have in debt. And I literally covered my ears like a three-year-old and said, no, I don't want to know. No, I don't want to know. And he told me. But he works in FPU. I mean, you have to.

You got to do this. Yeah. All right. Yep. Yep. So he told me and the number $140,000 stuck with me. And did it just like terrify you when you heard that oh my word like yes it just felt like i literally you knew it was bad so you didn't want to hear it yes i felt like i was in chains i mean it's bondage yeah and so i on the way home

from work one day um the lord met me in my car, which I'm serious when I say that. He met me in my car and he was like, why don't you sell the house? And I was like, oh, that's a weird thought. I wasn't even thinking about our debt or about anything. And so I did hold some numbers, realizing we had a lot of equity in our home and that if we sold our home, that would give us the traction that we needed to pay off our debt. So I told Taylor and he immediately dismissed it in the way I presented it. And then we brought it back up and we honestly just had this piece that that's exactly what we were supposed to do. So you sold the house? We sold our house. Wow. When did it sell? It sold in about 36 hours in January of 2018. Of course.

Yeah. Yeah. Ugh. Do you regret that? Not for one moment. Not even a tiny bit. So it was God? Yeah.

It was God. Yeah. Okay. Because sometimes when he meets me in my car, it's pizza. It's not the Holy Spirit. Last night's pizza. Yeah. So I just have to make sure when I'm hearing from god that i really heard from him but you know with hindsight's 2020 on

spiritual guidance you know i mean you look back and you go yeah that was god and so because you got a piece about the transaction it happened fast efficiently cleared the debt up and now you're standing here with no regrets and so then you can look back based on all that and go that was god 100 yeah and we're in a nicer newer house that's close to work like it's just a it's just a better better everything better situation yeah yeah so what do you guys tell people i mean you tell people every day i mean you're associate director of customer success and financial peace so uh but what do you when your friends are talking or your family's talking to you and they say, how did you pay off 140,000? Well, part of it is we sold our house, but we also did fill in the blank. What'd you do? We budgeted. We stuck to a plan and we were each other's support. But I will also say that we held things loosely. And what I mean by that is like our house was just that.

It was a house. And we knew we could make a home anywhere. And our treasure's not here anyway. And we knew we wanted to change the trajectory for our kids. So, I mean, that's a lot. But I will say just hold things loosely because they are just that. They're things. Just stuff.

Great T-shirts, though. Debt-free tribe T-shirts. Yes, they are. My Just stuff. Great t-shirts though, Debt Free Tribe t-shirts. Yes, my mom, my mom made those. All right, go mom, go mom. I love it. I got to ask Taylor, Dave, you know, in your position, Taylor, obviously you believed in this stuff, you promoted this stuff, and then you make the change yourself. Now on this moment, you know, on this stage, coming on the other side of it, how has the transformational journey for you and your family changed the way that maybe you look at the products and the

services that we provide to the, to the masses? Yeah. I mean, it changes the way that I think about problems and it's, everything is about getting people where we are, right? Like it's all about helping the customer better, not making my job easier. It's about the people on the other side. Yeah. So how many more people are going to have the experience you guys have had now with you in that role and having actually lived it? Yeah. It gives you insight when you're your own focus group.

Yeah. Yeah. Very good stuff. Very cool. So outside of the two of you, and I'm sure you had a few team members that were cheering for you. Who else was cheering for you? Our Taylor's parents. My parents.

100%. They were our people from the very beginning. So mom and dad are here to celebrate with you all too then. Yep. Very cool. And you brought the kiddos. What are their names and ages? Let's bring them into the shot.

We got Jackson. He turned seven tomorrow. Tomorrow. And then Annabelle will be four in a week and a half. Awesome. And they got their own debt-free tribe t-shirts too. That's right. Way to go.

Way to go. Cute. Very cute. Very cute. Well, I would give you a copy of Chris Hogan's book, but you've got any books you want because you work here. We're proud of you guys. You're a great team member.

You've done really, really good work for the last six years. And the stuff you're working on is vitally important in financial peace. And very, very proud of you. I know your mom and dad are. And you've sacrificed, but I think more than anything, you've been obedient. And obedience got you there. Not obedient to me, but obedient to the voice of the Lord. Very, very well done, you guys.

All right, Jackson, can you scream debt-free when your dad tells you to? Can you do it? He's been practicing. He's been practicing? All right, you've been practicing for the big day. This is a Super Bowl, baby, right here. All right, here we go. Taylor and Stephanie and Jackson and Annabelle.

$140,000 paid off in 26 months, including the sale of their home. Count it down. Let's hear a debt-free scream. Three, two, one. We're debt-free! Very good! Woo! That's how it's done right there.

That's how it's done. Well, if you want to learn more about what he works on every day, we have a 14-day free trial for Financial Peace University in these crazy times right now. In 30 years of doing FPU, we've never done a 14-day free trial. For the first time ever, you can do that. It includes all the nine lessons for Financial Peace University, includes EveryDollarPlus, the world's best budgeting app, the Baby Steps Tracker.

It's all free for two weeks. Go to DaveRamsey.com slash hope and get your 14-day free trial. DaveRamsey.com slash hope. Business leaders make your life easier with FreshBooks. Whether you're starting a business or you've been at it a long time, FreshBooks is one of the smartest decisions you'll make this year. FreshBooks is an accounting software designed for people like you that lets you do the things like automate your invoicing and your online payments so you get more time to work on your business. Try FreshBooks for 30 days

free at freshbooks.com slash Dave Ramsey. Our scripture of the day, Philippians 2, 4 through 5, let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this in mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus. Renee Brown says, a leader is someone who holds her or himself accountable for finding the potential in people and in processes. This is the Dave Ramsey Show. Thank you for joining us. Ken Coleman is my co-host today, Ramsey Personality. Paul is with us, and Paul is in Florida. Hey, Paul, how are you? Oh, doing good. Hope you're having a good day. I am, brother. How can we help?

Oh, yeah. Okay, so recently I got a position promoted to a manager. I work for a very large pest control company in Florida and in the United States. And they were planning on moving me to Orlando to their new branch that's opening up. But then they just recently, a position opened up at the branch that I'm currently at. And right now I'm living with my grandparents. And we started your Financial Peace University last month, and we wrote down all of our bills, memos, and then we found out actually how much debt we were in. It kind of shocked us.

And so we were wondering, should we make the move to Orlando and rent, or should we stay with my grandparents and save up money? I'm a little bit confused. You got the same option, the same offered career-wise in both locations yes okay so why would you want to move to orlando would you rather be there than the city that you're in uh well i was just um we were just wondering, like, how it would work. Because I know I was reading or listening to your podcast, and you said that it's best to move out. And so we weren't sure if we should do.

So he's living with the grandparents. How much money are you saving right now? So let's just take the idea here. If we took the Orlando job and you had to rent a place in Orlando, how much money are you saving by staying and living with your grandparents while getting out of debt? So what we've seen is Orlando, it could probably be around $1,000 to $1,300 a month in rent. Yeah, so $1,300, is that what you said? $1,000. Yeah, $1,000 to $1,200. $1,000 to $1,200. Okay, so there1,300, is that what you said? $1,000.

Yeah, $1,000 to $1,200. $1,000 to $1,200. Okay, so there's your number you've got to look at, and so then you've got to plug that into your numbers, and is it that big of a challenge for you? How much will it delay you paying off your debt, getting through your debt snowball, if you were to take the Orlando job? What's your household income? It's about $75 right now.

Does your wife work outside the home? She works at home. She works for a newspaper design company. Will you get a bump with this managerial position? Yeah, I would be getting an increase in pay. But that's at either location, right? Yeah. The same job?

You could take the same managerial job in Orlando or the city that you're currently in, correct? That's correct. So there's no advantage to moving. I mean, you could move out of your grandparents' house and stay in that city. Mm-hmm. Is rent cheaper in that city? Actually, it's cheaper in the Orlando orlando area okay what city are you in uh i'm in uh port st lucie oh yeah okay all right well i mean it's just here's the thing

where do you want to be five years from now uh well um the the way the career works uh or the the career track is if I become a service manager for three years, then after that I can become a branch manager at one of the branches in the United States. So that's the goal, correct? Yeah. Yeah, I mean, personally, Dave, I'd stay with the grandparents because I'm saving money. If they're giving us that opportunity for a short amount of time, how long would you stay with them to get this debt paid off? What's that look like timeline-wise?

Well, for right now, we've been there for over a year now. Okay. How much longer would you stay? We probably, well, we have about, we make sort of, we have about $63,000 in debt. And you make $75,000 a year. Yeah. And you have no expenses to stay with your grandparents. So you're out of debt in 18 months, right? Yeah.

Yeah. Is your wife pressuring you to get out of grandparents' house, or are we all comfortable? Oh, she was, like my family and hers, been saying we should stay. Yeah, we were just looking at the different options. It's just a function of advancing the timeline. Where do you want to be in your career? Which city do you want to be in? That's where you ought to be. And the debt is not going to dictate it one way or the other.

I mean, if you want to stay there 18 months, just take that managerial job. It sounds like it slows down your career at all. And then move out and rent in Port St. Lucia. And then go from there. And, you know, the next time they move you for a branch position or whatever, then you'll move again. But it's not the end of the world either way you can do either one is going to be fine uh so which is just your preference uh it's not it's not like you're stupid for doing one or stupid for doing the other that's not the point and that's not how i would do it all right james

is with us in texas, James. How are you? Better than I deserve. How are you? Better than I deserve. What's up? Yes, I have a question. How do I help my wife, like, have hope for our financial future instead of thinking about time that we lost paying off my dumb debt before we married. Okay, the future and the past are two different things. So how does the past, unless you're repeating the mistakes, how does the past stupid cause you to lose hope for the future? Most of us have stupid in our past.

Yeah, yeah. for the future most of us have stupid in our past yeah yeah um i guess you know just seeing how the decisions have delayed our progress you know we're going to be out of debt by september um but then we have all in the past all in the past. Yeah. Your past should not affect your hope unless you are repeating the exact same mistakes. If you learned from your past, it ought to increase your hope. Yeah. Well, I wouldn't say I've made the same level of mistakes. I have, you know, slipped up as being the head of the household financially here and there but um definitely not the same level that it was before okay so you've

not had a good track record of working a plan yeah well you want to know how she gets hope can you tell me now? You develop a track record of working a plan. There you go, dude. Your inconsistency is what's stealing her hope. Yeah. Am I wrong? No.

No, sir. Yeah. I got to tell you, man, it takes a lot. You're like all of us. We're all, I mean, me, Ken, just the same thing. There's a portion of integrity that is called consistency. And, you know, the Bible talks about being trustworthy, worthy of trust. And I've spent my whole life trying to every year be a little bit more worthy of trust because when i was a young guy i was not worthy of trust i sucked and uh i crashed our whole house we burned i mean we lost

everything right so can you imagine sharon ramsey not trusting me you bet she didn't trust me i wasn't worthy but i've been i've been on that and getting a little better every year. You're better now than you were. You said that. But you can't expect her to, you know, get all thrilled about this until she sees the discipline. And the communication from you, you guys working together and carrying this together. Got to change the scoreboard, Dave.

She's looking at a scoreboard, and it feels like the gap's just not getting any closer as he begins to really get disciplined and change the scoreboard, Dave. She's looking at a scoreboard, and it feels like the gap's just not getting any closer. As he begins to really get disciplined and change the scoreboard, every fan that's ever been to a game when our team came back, as we got closer and closer and the score got closer, we got hope. Get excited. We might win this game. We might win this game, and she'll be the same way.

Absolutely. Love it. Love it. Ken Coleman, thanks for hanging out. Thanks for having me. That puts us out of the Dave Ramsey Show in the books. Thanks to James Childs, our producer, Kelly Daniel, our associate producer and phone screener. I'm Dave Ramsey, your host, and we'll be back.

Hey, guys, this is Kelly, associate producer of The Dave Ramsey Show. Did you know over 16 million people listen to The Dave Ramsey Show every week? And a lot of those people listen on one of our 600 plus radio stations across the country. To find a station near you, head to DaveRamsey.com slash show.