The Ringer NBA Show - Records Worth Breaking With Shea Serrano (Ep. 94)

Episode Date: April 6, 2017

The Ringer's Chris Vernon and Shea Serrano discuss Russell Westbrook's ridiculousness (5:00), Cavs-Celtics (13:00), Gordon Hayward's improvement (20:00), and the best NBA records yet to be broken (26:00). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Just go to tune-in.com slash ringer and subscribe. Download the tune-in app and start listening today. Tune in, your everything audio app. Welcome to The Ringer MBA show. I'm Chris Varnan, and joining me today from the Ringer.com is Shay Serrano. What's up, dude? I must tell you. I was a gunshot noises.

I was going to be introduced to gunshot noises. And I didn't do it last time I had me out, so I did it myself. You may have noticed that you were put directly on the air with me today. because, and our listeners wouldn't know this, but you, there was no producer that talked to you today, and there's a good reason for that. The unrelenting slander that you have disposed on Twitter.com for the great Tate Frazier has gotten to the point now where Tate won't even speak to you and put you directly on with me. In fact, he's even angry that I'm even having you on today. He won't give a podcast, though. I just want a podcast.

Why is that? He gives literally everybody else a podcast, but he won't even answer my emails anymore. This is what he has told me. So for anybody that doesn't know, Tate Frazier produces not only the NBA show. He's also the host of the T-Dup College Basketball podcast. He produces Bill's podcast. And he has told me that while Shea goes on Twitter on regular occasion, everybody always is asking. you why you don't have a podcast and you say because Tate Fraser won't give me one,

Tate told me he has offered you no less than a hundred times to have a podcast of which you have no interest. He's just spinning the story. He keeps telling me no. And oftentimes it's accompanied with a racist quote quote. What am I supposed to do with that, Chris? What am I supposed to do with that? You are preposterous.

What was the, just out of curiosity, what was the podcast you pitched? I pitched them the several podcasts. I pitched them the basketball podcast right before they gave you one. I pitched them a TV podcast right before they gave Chris Ryan one. Every single, they just. Last night, I was at the Grizzlies and Oklahoma City game and watched Russell Westbrook fall one rebound shy of getting a triple double. But he did hit the game winner.

I mean, it's a one-point game. He stares down Tony Allen hits a three in his face and then it's curtains. And it just seems like now there is, it seems like there's this crazy momentum for him getting this MVP now. Doesn't it feel this way? Because he's like closing out these games. He did it to the magic that, you know, on that Wednesday night game. You're seeing these highlights over and over. He's going to get, he's going to end up averaging a triple double.

And it just seems like the highlights are going to be too much for any of the other candidates to overcome. At least that's how it kind of feels to me. feels that way. Was it like seven? And then the one last night at 40, what do you have? 45 points last night, something goofy like that?

45. And just 45, yeah. And yeah. Like, I don't know. How do you stop that? You're James Harden. Maybe the best offensive player in the NBA right now, watching this happen.

What can you do? What else can you do besides what James Hardin has done to win the MVP? Like, I don't know. Somebody's going to be super upset and they absolutely should be. I'm fascinated by you're a Spurs fan but you have not really stumped for Kauai Leonard

though he is certainly one that some people believe should be the MVP for people who say they read a lot of books when they don't really read a lot of books you know what I'm talking about that's what's going on here I love Kauai he's my favorite player in the NBA

but there's no way I can look at what he's doing versus what Hardin and Westbrook are doing and say by virtue of last night it is now going to be the Grizzlies versus the Spurs. My beloved Grizzlies, how terrified are you? I cannot wait to talk trash to you every single night during the playoffs.

Tom's that last game they played. Y'all are going to get swept. Maybe y'all might win one. Hold on now. Maybe Mike Connolly wakes up. Hold on. The game went to overtime and the Grizzlies were playing Wade Baldwin and Wayne Selden is their back cord.

Shut up. Correct. Give me a break. That's waxed. Anytime the Spurs won the game, the other team got toasted. It only happened They went by 1.45 point Toasted.

You know, in 2011, they ripped your beating heart out of your chest and threw it on the ground and then urinated on it. And it's six years later. Six years. I wasn't watching basketball in 2011. I don't know what you're talking about.

I'll look it up later on, but at the time I was not a basketball fan. So we are going to have the Grizzies and the Spurs, which they'll probably put on like the sci-fi channel or something. The other one that is, I mean, who is interested in that, like, big time? Only you and me. Only you and me.

You and me. But what also took place last night because of the Oklahoma City win, the Memphis loss, is that we have all but determined it looks like it's going to be Houston, Oklahoma City. So we're going to get the Harden-Westbrook matchup in the first round, which. It's going to be great. That's going to be insane. It will. It will be insane.

And I think it's going to be closer than people end up winning in six. maybe five, but I think that games are going to be, they're going to be rock fights. And you know what Westbrook, he ain't dicking around. Like, he's two other guys that show up super serious. He'll get a couple, he'll probably win a couple games by himself. But as I was watching them last night, I was thinking, if they are to match up with Houston,

you got to think it's going to take 115 to win the games, right? On that. Right. Okay, so let's pencil him in for 40. Let's say he averages 40. That'd be crazy. But let's just say he averages 40. He's still going to get 75 somewhere else.

And I'm looking up and down that roster and I'm like, all right. I mean, like it feels like either Oladipo or Canter. One of those guys has to have like a monster series because it's hard to, it's hard to look up and down that roster and go, all right, where did the other 75 come from? Like on average, you know, in order to win four out of seven. And so I just, I don't know if they got enough scoring to be able to keep up with the Rockets game in, game out. No, of course they don't. You got, okay, so that's how good Russell Westbrook is where you say, we'll pencil them in for 40.

And I'm just like, yeah, you're probably right. He's probably going to average 40 this year. But Stephen Adams is going to give you like six or eight if he gets really hot. Hey, so we're, hey, so we're to 46. We're to 46. Canter is good for 15. Maybe if they let them play. All right. So now we're up to 61.

All right. Roberson, Roberson's good for two. 63. If he gets four points in a playoff game, they should do the graphic where they show the ball on fire every time he shoots it after that. That's how I think they should, they would improve showing Thunder games on TV. Remember when they used to do that with hockey,

where they would light the puck up during the actual game? Do that with Thunder games when Roberson shoots. just put the ball on fire. Yeah, who else is out there? Aldi Depot, Dougie, right there. He's going to average 18 points. Well, I don't know where the rest of the points come from. I don't think they can beat the rocket.

Well, they don't have, you know what? It's actually, I know you're kind of goofing around. They don't have a big front line, Houston. You know what I mean? Like the idea that Todd Gibson could have a good series, especially when somebody's paying attention to Adams and trying to keep them off the offensive glass or whatever, that certainly would not be crazy.

They don't have a lot of brute force down there by any means. I'm serious about Todd. I'm very pro-Toggins. Ever since he dunked on Dwayne Wade, remember the dunk he had on the playoffs? Ever since then. So that's going to be the playoff series, so it looks like.

It seems like that was kind of hashed out in the NBA last night. The other thing that was hashed out was LeBron James played against the Boston Celtics, and while the cabs have been reeling, They've been bad defensively. A, before the game, LeBron's being asked about the game. He said, I've been to six NBA finals. Don't ask me about a regular season game.

So he was clearly already a bit miffed before the game even started. And then he put his stamp on, right? He had 36 points. And they just wiped out the Celtics last night. Do you think that was like a big statement? Should we make a lot of what took place with the Cavs and the Celtics? Absolutely. Basketball for like at least the last 40 years,

knew that as soon as LeBron said, I've been to six NBA finals, don't ask about a regular season game. They knew he was going to go fucking. He's super just fantastic doubt into the other team. He wanted them to think like he wouldn't even try him for that game. And he just came out there and was breaking neck. He did the same thing in the Matthew Doevo.

Like he's very good at playing those sort of game. Yeah, that was a big moment. went last night and the Celtics, my beloved Isaiah and Crowder and Jay, they, they, they, crumbled. They're going to, everybody at this day they're going to lose. But Boston made a lot of that. It felt like that. That was not just like another regular season game.

Like, you know Boston went into that really wanting to win and them try to make a statement going. Like somebody was going to be making a statement heading into the playoffs. And damn, man. Like, I've been on the train of, hey, maybe something. really is wrong with the calves and maybe they're not going to be able to just mow through everybody

but then you see something last night you're like oh god maybe they can't just flip a switch it's inevitable who beats them nobody beats them it would have to take it I mean it would have to take some crazy stuff happening that's for sure

because none of these other teams you know I know Chris Ryan wrote about this this morning he was like Celtics this is why you go get Paul George and I do think you watch last night, like, man, maybe they should have given up a King's Ransom to get somebody else in their lineup because it doesn't feel like any of those teams are strong enough to really consider after you watch what happened to Boston last night. No. You know what was great about the game last night, the difference between being a team that thinks they're good, like the Celtic, they're pretty good and they think that they're good versus a team that knows they can. destroy the other team.

Because all that the cabs did, they were like, all right, cool, let's put Isaiah Thomas in 45 picking rolls in a row and pull the legs off of the stuff. I love the cats, man. I love LeBron. Other story that came out yesterday was the report that James Dolan, the owner of the New York Knicks, was in a verbal altercation outside of Madison Square Garden on Tuesday, and he admitted calling that fan and asshole. It says the Knicks owner told Deadspin, which first reported the incident, that he got into a verbal spat with fan Mike Hammerski on Tuesday in response to Hammerski yelling at him, sell the team, Jim.

And James Dolan told Deadspin.com, I did call him an asshole because he is an asshole. Okay. So now, I almost feel like in this particular story, we need to say, set aside our previous thoughts on James Dolan, or maybe we just can't, right? Is it possible that that guy was really an asshole and deserved to be called an asshole? No, thank you. So I'm going to side with the other guy, even though I have no information about any of this. Okay, so what if we switched it, though, and it was somebody else?

Let's say it was your beloved LeBron Jane. And LeBron James said, doesn't matter, LeBron, you're still a sissy or whatever. You know, like, he's not going to Boston. A boss had turned to the guy and you're an asshole. Would you side with LeBron? I would side with LeBron, yeah. LeBron could be, they could be like talking about my son. And LeBron's like, your son's an asshole.

And I'm right, LeBron. I'm siding with LeBron there. So the point is, so the point is we just wouldn't side with James Dolan no matter what. No matter what. No. Especially after he did the Oakley thing, right? The Oakley thing this year. Oh, okay.

Actually, there's a couple of things. A, he's run the Knicks into the ground, and they've been a dreadful franchise forever, and yet they're worth a bazillion dollars. And then B, you have the stuff where he hired Phil Jackson and the Carmelo stuff that is allowed to go on. Then you remember that whole contentious email chain he had in 2015. He told a fan to start rooting for the Nets because the Knicks don't want you. Yes, yeah, yeah. And then he banned Oakley, right?

Yeah. And then he banned Oakley, right? Right. I can come home from work and my house is on fire. And James Dolan is like, show you, your house is on fire. And I would just be like, no, it's not. And I just go inside and burn. Just because it was James Golden, I wouldn't believe him all the way past anything.

I'm out. I'm out on James Dolan. Earlier this, or I guess it was last week, we have not spoken since you put out the personality quiz for the NBA, where you had an article where you could go through it and you would answer it. answer a series of questions, and then you would end up with who you are in the NBA. I will tell you, I took the quiz, and I ended up as a cult hero. I think it was Dionne Waiters, I believe, was the picture. Yeah, yeah.

So I, but in the article, you never tell what you ended up on your own personality quiz. That's because I invented the quiz. So I don't matter what I would. We want to know. I would just cheat. I would just cheat if I took it, if that was me. So you did this, you did this in my, like when you're writing out the personality quiz, you're doing it so that you know that you would end up with the best one.

Oh, no, no. I talked to like four of my buddies who work at Harvard. We use a Harvard supercomputer. We went through a bunch of personality traits and that's how we got the answers for everything. This is a very serious, very, I worked out for like four months and then we finally got to put it out. What are the names of your four buddies that work at Harvard? Harvard? Tony, Tom, Terry, the 14th is what we call them.

We grew up together. Where? That doesn't sound like kids you grew up with. Well, when they went to Harvard, they all changed their name to, like, white-sounding names to get ahead. They're all Mexican. Originally is Antonio Tomas. And they just changed them.

You see the thing where the guy was like, his resume said Jose, and he was, wasn't getting any calls back, and then he changed it to Joe, and he got calls back. Like, that's what happened here. The 14th. I love them. Shout out the 14thes forever. What was your original name before Shea? Estelle.

Esteban. Yeah. Estevan Serrano? Or was it different? And I had to change it. I was like, oh, what do white people like? Oh, white people like baseball. What's the thing in baseball people like?

Oh, it's Shea Stadium. Boom, Shay Serrano sounds like Shea Stadium. I started getting emails back from editors. I got in the game. And you told him you were named after Shay Stadium. I did. I said, we're a baseball family. Me and my dad, we go to the games every day.

And then I thought I became a writer. That's the story. And then you showed up at the office and they're like, you're not shaking. You didn't go to baseball games with your dad every day. No, man. It was too late, though. I was already in.

As De Bon Serrano. That's who's joining me at the NBA show today. Why did you write a love poem to Gordon Hayward? That one happened, and I just happened across them, like, Gordon Hayward, and they were talking to the guy who cuts his hair. And then I just started looking at Gordon Howard stuff, and I was like, he had been incredible. It felt like it needed to be done.

Not enough people were talking about Gordon Hayward, so I want to say his name. This is going to be, like, the big moment for him, I think, because he hasn't been in the playoffs. And now we're going to see him. I mean, Paul's been on fire. Blake's been on fire. They're averaging like a combined 60 points together these last couple of games. They looked like they were in some kind of a mode in unison.

They ended up beating Dallas last night. So they got another win last night. But it looks like it's going to be Utah and the clippers facing each other. And like there's always the, you know, the first time a guy is in a playoff series when he's in that spot. pressurized. Obviously, Utah is not on national TV much at all. I kind of feel like it's either going to be, it's

got a big chance of being Hayward's coming out party, right? That's what my fingers are crossed for. You have to assume the clippers will give to win a game or two at the buzzer. Where would you say Gordon Hayward ranks on your favorite white people list?

At the moment? At the moment, he's number four. He's number four on my favorite white people list. Behind. Behind. It goes, you know, not deceased Paul Newman. We're talking about cool and loose Paul Newman.

We're totally in the time capsule. All right. So here, hold on. Let me put this list together. All right. So Shea Serrano's list of white people. We've got Hayward at four. But the three ahead of him are alive, Paul Newman.

We're just going to pretend he's alive. Okay. Reese Witherspoon, she's number two. She jumped up, shot up the white people chart. TV show, by the way. Number three, Rapidport is a perfect guy to play old Chris Bullitt. So that's my number three pick. And then four is Gordon Hayward. We'll round it out with five. Who's right behind Hayward? Jesus. If we're counting Jesus as white, like when you go to church.

He's the pitcher. In the pictures. It's my pick. He's three spots below. In fairness, it probably, in fairness, it probably depends on the home with the pitch. Yeah, because in my home, he's Mexican. on my wall. Very interesting that you did not have either Bill Simmons or Stone Cold Steve Austin on this list. Wow. Six and seven. They were six and seven.

And Bill would have got a cameo on Big Little Lies. He would have shot up there too. But, you know, Reese is a powerhouse. Understood. Gordon Hayward, Esteban Serrano's fourth favorite white person on earth. We've got to take a quick break when we come back in honor of Russell Westbrook having a chance at breaking the triple double record that has been held forever by Oscar Robertson.

We are going to give you our three NBA records that we want to see broken. We'll do that after these words. Are you hiring? Do you know where to post your job to find the best candidates? Posting your job in one place isn't enough to find quality candidates. If you want to find the perfect hire, you need

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One more time, try it for free. Go to ZipRecruiter.com slash Ringer. All right, Shay, as you know, Russell Westbrook has a chance of breaking the triple double record. It's crazy when I brought up this topic about the most unbreakable, or not rather unbreakable records, but rather records we want to see broken. If you type in on breakable records, because I use that as a reference point, Oscar Robertson's triple doubles is actually on the list of like anybody that can Google this can go and look up like NBA's most unbreakable records.

When people do like, you know, BuzzFeed list or slideshows on Bleacher Report or whatever, it's all got nobody will average a triple double or have this many triple doubles in the season. So we've obviously proven that one of the so-called unbreakable records in the NBA is breakable. But we've got to come up with three others that we actually want to see broken. You want to start or you want me to? Let's alternate. You go first. All right.

I want the all-time scoring record to be broken. And the reason I think the top two scorers of all the time are Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Carl Malone. And I find them to both be in. intensely boring figures. And the NBA is, like, cool and exciting and, like, having those two guys as, like, the guys that scored the most. Like, I'm bored even talking about them right now. LeBron James is right now, he's seventh.

And he needs, like, Dirk's on the list. Obviously, he's very high, but he's 8,000 points away. he ain't getting 8,000 more points. LeBron is 7th. He's 10,000 away. And he's been scoring roughly 2,000 a year or thereabouts. And we'll do it again this year. So I think he's got like, I mean, if he's 10,000 away,

how many awesome years you think LeBron has left? And don't joke and say 20. He has three unstoppable years. Okay, so we got three unstoppable. Well, that'd get him 6,000 more points or right around between 5 and 6,000. He'd still need 5 to 6,000 more after that. Yeah, I don't think that one happened. You don't think so.

But it would be cool to see. You know, when you ask me this question, I'm thinking about it, I want, similar to what you're saying, I want an exciting thing to happen, but that's not a typical thing broken. That flash is brilliant. So my pick, my number third pick, let me see somebody break Clay Thompson's 37 points in a quarter. I want a record where I can watch the whole thing on YouTube and just relive the whole moment. I don't want to have to watch 20 years of LeBron playing basketball to see him.

Because you know when he breaks, it's not going to be like a fighting. It's going to be a jumper. It's a three-throw or whatever. But I want to see somebody catch fire and put up 40 points in a quarter. I would love to see that one. I like when it's just like watching this, make sure you watch. I want to see that one get broken. I don't know by who, though.

No, no, to your point. Well, you had written the article about the, well, hell, Devin Booker might could do it. Hell, a guy in 70 a game. It might be able to do it. But that's the one I want to see. Because you have to get insanely hot to break that record. And you're going to have hit a bunch of shots in a row.

And that's always really excited when you get to like five threes in a row. six threes in a row and the place is just rocking even if you're on the road by that point people are going nuts already doesn't it devalue it though if it happens again so quickly don't you want something that's like been around for a long time no i don't need that i need to be excited man for a season or something i want to see i want to see buckets that's what i want to see the one time that it would be good on the calderon thing is if somebody had like a bazillion of in the season and never missed one. Like if James Harden went to the line, I don't know, 400 times, or actually more than

that, right? Say he went to the line, I don't know, five, six hundred times in a season, and he still hadn't missed. Like at that point, that's the only way the free-throw thing could be interesting, is if you had somebody hit. Yeah, but you still have got to get through 250 free throws in a row before it becomes is exciting. I think you're right.

And you need two minutes of Steph Curry going nuts before it's exciting. So give me that one. All right. To your point on the whole, we could flip it on league pass and turn it on. I want Scott Skiles' record being broken. The 30 assist in a game. Oh, 30 assists. That would be good.

Because I just don't like him. And don't ask him why. You like Scott Giles? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know why I don't like him. him. He's number eight on my white people list. How dare you?

He's not number eight. How dare you not like Scott Scott's guy? I think he's because he kind of let me down. I mean, I loved him. I thought he did like this crazy job with that Bucks team that made the playoffs, the whole fear of the deer, that whole run that they had. They were a fun, fun playoff team. And I really liked him then.

But for whatever reason over the course of the last couple years, I didn't like him as much. And then like just seeing him hold that. Like he's not an all-time great. Right, by any means. And so I guess there is something kind of cool about a non-all-time great holding a record like that. But, I mean, do you know how frigging hard that's going to be to break 30 assists in a game? I mean, that's outrageous.

I think they scored 155 in regulation in that game. And really? That's a stat right there. Yeah. So, I mean, I don't know. Yeah, that would be a good one. I like Scott Scalcos. Scott Scales, he's an intimidating dude, but he looks like a very, like a very righteous kind of guy.

But he's, like, you, I know Scott Scouts didn't vote for Trump. That's what I know when I look at him. I believe in Scott Schuyall. I agree. That would be a good one to watch, to watch get broke. Because who's going to do it? Who breaks that record? I don't agree.

I don't agree with you on the whole, on the whole, you know. No, I don't. I don't. I think Scott's, here's what I think Scott Sciles wants the most amount of his income possible. And so that's what he strikes me as, that he would forego every other thing, human rights and everything else. If you told him, here's what your check will be if this guy's president. Here's what your check will be if that guy's president. I kind of feel the way.

I think that I think Scott Sciles would willfully donate a portion of his paycheck for like after school programs. That's who Scott Scouts is to me. me. But let's find Scott Scott's on the phone. Follow him all right now. You know what's going to happen. Somebody on Twitter's going to send me like all of these charities that he's involved in or something. I hope. I hope that that happens. Please come through for me Twitter. Wasn't he the one that was profiled as like having a bunch of kids?

You remember? Like, yeah, I think so, man. I'm pretty sure. I honestly don't know anything about Scott Scott's out other than he had 30-fist in the game. And what his face is like? There's always two things I know about Cascow. Okay, here we go. How about this one, all right? Here we go. I just found it.

He was profiled in the whole, here it is. Here's a story that was done by Complex. It is the big papas, and it is about athletes with several children. Oh, no. Oh, let's see this. A number of kids, six, six kids. He said, Sciles is even on the list, or that dude actually has some ballers beat in illegitimate kids category was six.

There's no word on how many baby mamas there are. Scott Scott's Cowell was getting it in. He was getting it in during his playing days. I respect it. Therefore, back to my point, his money is split up several different ways, Shea. All right. You might have a point. You might have a point.

Next record, do you want to see broken? This is a personal. There's never at any point in the history. history of the NBA team had Mexican player on it. I want to see that record broke. I need to see that happen. And I should point out here, I should point out that, but it's a stat that I know

100%. Somebody gets 75 assist in the game. Like, I didn't research that. Never been to Mexicans on an NBA team before. I want that to happen. Chris, I want Mike Britson on TV like, oh, Ramirez pass it to Hernandez. Like, I want that time. I said it out loud. forgive me because I do not

I do not have a tremendous amount of knowledge about Mexican basketball players The first one, like Eduardo Nara He was Mexican, right? That's the goat, that's the goat Mexican basketball player He played in like 600 games After that It's like Jorge Gutietta

And he played in 70 games or something Devin Booker is actually a quarter Mexican So I'm claiming him I'll claim him as as one but there haven't been many I mean there are several Latino players but I want to make you can't count a quarter

I'm counting a quarter when he scored 70 points in the game I was like fuck it Devon Booker's Mexican even if he had only can white can white can white people claim can white people claim half black

and half white absolutely not y'all got enough you're fine you're fine Chris you don't need to start taking other people's stuff off of their plate We got like Gordon Hayward I'm just talking basketball

We're not talking the whole world We got Gordon Hayward Kevin Love and like Doug McDermott I don't know That's a solid That's a solid three That's a solid starting three right there There are no Mexican players in NBA right now

With the exception of my beloved Kevin Booker Whose mom is half Mexican Which makes him a quarter Mexican I'm claiming him though He belongs to us Well just give him Give him a Mexican first name.

Devin. Devin is fine. Devin's fine? Yeah, when I was teaching, I had two Mexican kids named Devin. So it's fine. He's good. He's good where he is. It's not a traditional Mexican name, but it's like a new age Mexican name.

That's like third, fourth generation Mexican name when you're blended all the way in. He's officially blended in. He's like a covert agent. My last one is also a big picture one, much like yours, how you want to see two. Mexican guys on one NBA roster. I want to see, and I think this is possible now, given the success of Isaiah Thomas, maybe Berea and a couple others, I want to see somebody smaller than 5'3 in the NBA. Mugsy Boggs.

Mugsy Boggs has had this record for a very long time, Shea, very long. Yes. And do you think how small Isaiah Thomas looks out there? Like people go look up Muxy Bokes on YouTube. All right. He is like six inches shorter, at least listed. So if we're just going by listed height, he was six inches shorter than Isaiah Thomas, half a foot shorter.

And given, you know, given now that like all these kids shoot all these threes and are crossing over and he can't really put your hands on guys, which it would be very difficult to put your hands on a guy that's smaller in 5'3 anyway. Yeah. I hope that there is some, like that's my prayer that we look up in the next 10 to 20 years. There is a kid that never grows higher than 5'3. I mean, the chances of this are very, very minuscule, I understand, right? Because being under 5'3, I mean, that's tough to do anyway.

There's not a huge percentage that would be that small, I wouldn't think, much less than be one of the best. Hey, A, you have to be under 5-3B. You have to be one of the best 450 basketball players on Earth. Yeah, that's a great. You don't? That's a great call right there. Mugsy Boggs was super bad for my confidence because I would, before, I'm 5'7, so I was always like, and then here's another mugsy Boggs who, yeah, Isaiah Thomas, I say Tom, to take him

Mugsy Boggs into the post. Like, that's his game plan. Don't you think. That's a great thought. Yeah, but don't you think because of Thomas and maybe so and then, and the amount of guys that shoot threes and everything now did, right? Like, I don't know when you quit basketball. And I'd still play and I play for fun.

I play in intermereals at college, whatever. But in terms of, like, playing competitively, everybody else keeps growing and then you stop. If you're guys like us that are short to average height, right? Or maybe shorter than average height. You're just like, all right, it ain't happening for me. But maybe like short kids will keep on playing now. I don't know. That would be pretty great to see.

Yeah. So that's like that would be great. Isaiah Thomas is like the Martin Luther King for short people. Is that what you're telling me right now? Like he's blazing a trail? That's a little strong. Okay. I was just wondering.

But that's a great record. I never would have thought of that one. Great job, Chris. And your last one. What's your last one? My last one. Oh, I love this record. So I spent like a good force to find one to get broken, and this is the best one that I found.

When you did your Mugsy Bowles, because that's a pretty tough one to beat. However, this one, it's Matt Barnes, the beautiful Matt Barnes, Derek Fisher's. That's the farthest any NBA player. That's what I want to see. I want somebody to drive 100 miles to fight somebody else, 110 miles even. That's the unbreakable fight record right there. You know how mad you have to be to drive 95 miles to fight somebody? There's got to be a point around mile 45, mile 50, where you calm down.

55 miles. The only way I could see that happening is if you put that last Dr. Dre album, there's that song, one shot, one kill with like John Connor. If you just put that, you would just have to put that on repeat for like 90 miles. You'd have to stay. That's an hour and 15 minute drive. You've been to stay mad for an hour and 15 minutes. I've never been mad for more than I said I would need to be mad to make that.

He is Shea Serrano from the ringer.com, formerly Esteban Serrano. You know, ever since you said that, all I think about, and I don't know if you're going to remember this, do you remember there was that infomercial with the guy Esteban? And it was like guitars by Esteban. and he would play this classical guitar. I watched this infomercial like a thousand times. You could probably find it on like YouTube, but there was a guy named Esteban,

and like you could buy the guitar. And instead of like, I don't know, instead of like, you know, Gibson or some kind of guitar brand like that was on. Right? It said Esteban on the guitar. And it was this guy. He had like these super long fingers,

but he played classical guitar. he didn't play it with a pick. Do you know what I'm talking about at all? I feel like you're making all of this up right now. No, no. Go type in like guitars by Esteban or something. There was an infomercial. It was on like every day during my youth.

And now that's all I think about when you said that was your name. What's the guitar guy? I'm on. I went to YouTube right now. I've typed in guitars by Esteban in the search engine. There was no auto feel. Like it let me get all the way through with no auto feel. So the case is not great for you.

Wait, is the influential not up? I don't think so. I don't think, no. They're different guitars by, like, actual Esteban guitars, but I don't know that any of these aren't an infomercial. I'm pretty sure you just made it up. I did not just make it up. Did you grow up in Memphis?

Huh? Did you grow up in Memphis? No, I grew up in New York and St. Louis. Type in Esteban Music.com. Okay. How did you end up like the voice of the grizzlies? So I went to, all right, so I grew up in New York, St. Louis, and then when I was eight, or I'm sorry, we moved from New York to St. Louis when I was eight, and then I went to high school in St. Louis, and then post high school, I went to college in Tennessee, and then I ended up in Memphis because it was the closest big city. And I moved here the year that the grizzly started. So, I mean, like I was here on the very front end.

I got you. And we're going to beat the head out of the Spurs. That was not nearly... Sorry. Maybe next time. Actually, I was actually... I was in the CIA and I had a much different name. And I was a...

Now we're talking. You're Esteban Vernon? Yeah, my name was Esteban Vernon. Vernal. That's kind of like a hire-for-kill guy. And like I had an assignment in Memphis and it went all wrong. And so I've just kind of been... I took on this different.

name and started talking about basketball. And you ended up in podcast. Yeah. The internet's incredible, man. It's incredible. So, hey, did you pull up Estebanmusic.com? Yeah, I see the guy you're talking about. Yeah, I apologize.

Very long fingers. You're right. Esteban Serrano. We'll talk to you down the road. In fact, we'll have to talk to you during the Grizzlies and the Spurs. That's for sure. Yeah. Hit me up after a guy.

game two when it's two zeros first and we'll go over everything. How dare you. Me and Tate will be coming for you. Me and Tate, me and Tate, me and Tate Frazier will be coming for you, that's for sure. Tate Fraser, A.K. Fraser, aka Snake Fraser. Tell him, I said hello. I'll talk to you out later. All right, see you, chef. It's going to do it for another NBA show.

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