The Sabrina Zohar Show - 134: Dating or Delusion? What to Do When It’s Not Moving Forward - In The Trenches With Tech Guy

Episode Date: April 15, 2025

He says “you deserve better,” but you're still hoping he’ll change? In today’s episode, we’re calling out the real reason you can’t let go — even when the relationship isn’t progressing. From long-distance love that’s all memes and no meaning, to two years of exclusivity with zero commitment, we’re diving into the dating dynamics that keep you stuck, confused, and emotionally drained. If you’ve ever felt like you’re “kind of” dating someone who gives you just enough to stay — this episode is your wake-up call. Sabrina and Tech Guy break down listener-submitted stories and drop straight-talk advice on self-abandonment, repetition compulsion, avoidant partners, and why “not wanting a relationship” actually means something. You’ll learn how to stop romanticizing crumbs, stop blaming yourself, and start walking away with your dignity intact. It’s raw, it’s real, and it’s exactly what anxious daters need to hear. Want to submit your question for the show? Send your burning inquiries, include screenshots, or your dating profile for a chance to be featured to [e-mail] MERCH IS NOW AVAILABLE! Stuck After the Podcast? Master Implementation in 8 Weeks with Sabrina's Foundation Course HERE! Do you feel like your emotions run the show and react in ways you can’t control? Join the Nervous System 101: Navigating the Unknowns In Early Dating from Sabrina and Masha Kay HERE! Struggling with a breakup? Join the Make It Make Sense: Getting Through a Breakup course from Sabrina and Britt Frank HERE! Get Ad free HERE! Want to work with Sabrina? HERE! Don't forget to follow Sabrina and The Sabrina Zohar Show on Instagram and Sabrina on TikTok! Video now available on YOUTUBE! Disclaimer: The Sabrina Zohar Show, formally known as Do The Work, is not affiliated with A.Z & associates LLC in any capacity. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, hello, hello. Welcome to another episode of the Sabrina Zohars show. My name is Sabrina Zohar, and I am your host. Babies, we're back. We're in the trenches. It's me and tech guy and you guys. And we got the questions. We got it all.

I am so excited because I really do love being in the trenches with you guys. And we're going to go over all your questions and profiles and all that fun stuff. So guys, don't forget, send them in the trenches at Sabrinazohar.com. We are able to actually help you guys with what you're going through and it's not just a bunch of ethereal shit that you listen to on the Friday show. And as always, thank you, thank you for everything. Please don't forget to rate and review the show. Follow along in the socials, the Sabrina Zohar show on Instagram, TikToksabrida. And of course, on YouTube, subscribe.

You can watch all the episodes or listen to them on Spotify if you want to go all the way back to the OG. And please, as always, just use kindness with our words, right? We're trying to build a community here. And if you don't like it, that's okay. Everybody is welcome, but it's not my fucking job to keep everybody here. If you guys need anything, merch or you want to ask a question, you want to work with me. You want to join a course. Everything is on a link in show notes, Sabrinazohar.

dot com, whatever you guys need. We're here for you. And as always, I'm just grateful to be here with you for another week. So without further ado, let's get right on into it, shall we? Oh, hi, babe. Oh, hi. Welcome back. Thank you. I'm here. Yay. We love it when tech guys here. How you been? I'm doing pretty well. A little stressed with the move. We've got to figure out some shit and be able to actually get out of this place, but good otherwise. How are you? Well, the fun thing is, is that by the time this comes out, we don't know where we'll be. So this is going to be exciting. And This is our last in the trenches together in this studio. Bye, bitch.

Bye. This was fun. It's been great. It's been fun, but it hasn't been real great fun. And I think it's just time, which I don't, this is the first time we've announced it, that like, we're moving, we're expanding. We're going to get, we're moving to L.A. And we're going to get a better and bigger studio. And we're just really going to take this a lot more seriously and bring you guys more content of whatever you guys need help with.

So I'm excited. Me too. Yeah. Things have been okay. We've been very stressed around here, trying to rebuild. the show, build their business. It's 2025 by the time you're listening to this. It's a weird fucking year. But we're doing it. And we're all in this together. And if you're struggling right now, please know you're not alone. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. And it doesn't

mean that your healing hasn't happened. It just means that you're a human. And we're in this together. We're in this together. All right, baby. Shall we? Let's do it. Perfect. Okay. Hi, Sabrina and Tech guy. I'm 51 years old and I've been divorced three years. First I said that thought said three times. And I was like, can I read? Which is fine. I've done the dating apps, but the then met someone in person who I connected with immediately. He lives in my town is quite a bit younger than me, get a girl. But we have intense chemistry and a lot of fun together. We can have deep conversations and respect for one another. I know he cares about me, but in the beginning, we talked about how we didn't want a relationship. We didn't want a relationship? Okay. Now it's going on two

years of date. Baby, you guys are not dating. Two years of dating. We're exclusive not seeing other people, but our relationship is not progressing at this point. I feel like I need to start going in a different direction, but I hate to lose him, our chemistry connection, and time spent together. When I brought this up to him. He said he thinks I deserve better. And part of him feels that if I found someone who values me more, I could do great things. By the way, this is my first time reading these. Every time I want you guys to get the real reaction and not me canning it. Correct. He knows he can't give me what I deserve. Writing that last sentence makes it seem obvious what I should do, but it's still so hard to walk away.

Please help give me some insight and courage. Oh, thank you, Alyssa. Well, Alyssa, what you're describing is some cost fallacy. And that's... It's like, well, I've invested this much time and all of these things. And it's like, I really just did the episode on this of also this like fallacy that we think that we have more control and influence over somebody's decisions than we actually do. And what you're describing beautifully is self abandonment. But like this is the epitome of completely self abandoning. We're off the beginning. We didn't want a relationship. You saw that too. Oh, I saw that. What are your thoughts before? I keep going. I mean, she acknowledges even in the end of this, that writing that last sentence, she knows what she has. has to do. It just seems like she needs to put on her big girl pants and make it happen. Yeah. How long were you in a relationship unfulfilled? And now you're wasting more time with this schmuck two years in. I'm sure he's a lovely guy. I can't get me wrong. But to your point, yeah, what are we doing here? Because when somebody, this is where the whole, like, when someone tells you, I don't want a relationship, this is why you just spent two years with this person, potentially spinning

your wheels. Now, here's a thing. If you're someone that's like, I don't want a relationship, I don't want to get married again. I'm enjoying this, right? I just want to get late. I want to get dick down. Please have fun, right? And I've had to, you know who I'm about, I'm not going to say her name, but like, you know who I'm talking about. Who, one client, I fucking love this woman to the moon and back. She's one of my favorite people that I've ever worked with. And she was very clear of like, I'm good. I want to enjoy my time. She really liked the no commitment. Like, that worked for her. So she was dating a guy for a couple of years and neither one of them were progressing. And she was like, this is fine. She, but sure enough, what ended up happening? Which are working with me, was sure, and we're more.

She started getting more in her head. She started getting, and then she realized pretty quickly on, like, I'm not fulfilled. I had been telling myself for so long I didn't want anything when she was like, I was just trying to be okay with what he wanted or lack thereof. And as far as I'm concerned, any insight and courage, you got this. Here's a thing. You've already been going against what it is that you want this entire time. And none of this is a mistake. None of this is regret. You had a great time, but not all relationships. need to last forever. Not all relationships can last forever. And sometimes there are people in our lives that are just there for that time and that's okay. Yep. We have this weird fetishization that people need to be in our lives for all of eternity. But some people are in your life for a moment, a season, or forever. And it's okay if they don't fall into the ladder. And then definitely I hear a childhood, right? Like I hear that just like being a kid being like, I can't lose them, but this is all I have. And I have nobody else or a teenager, right? Like doesn't that sound like a teen that. that's coming home being like, I met the one. And your mom's like, okay, yeah, yeah, sure,

you're a fucking 13. Don't come back to me. And I mean, unless it's your grandparent's, a different story, but different time. But I think, Alyssa, the writing is on the wall. When somebody tells you, you deserve better what they're saying is, I've acknowledged I can't show up in the ways that you need and I'm not going to change who I am in order to be that person. That sounds like a lot. Good luck. Exactly. That's a, oh, that sounds like a you thing. Oh, yeah, yeah, you really want all that. And that's okay. I will never, this guy, I'm not going to villainize him. He has been up front from the beginning.

He said, I don't want anything. And that's now on us to be like, okay, well, now I do. And that's okay, right? No shame or blame. It's not of like, what was I thinking? How could I have done this? No, it's just, okay, well, now that I've kind of had some more time to think about this, this doesn't work for me.

And that's okay. Like, I think it's time for me to be more intentional the way that I date and take this experience into your next relationship so that you're not doing this again. You're not self-abandoning. You're not playing the cool girl who has no needs and walks in me. I don't want this either. No, it's okay to take up space. Fuck yeah.

Yeah. Anything else you wanted to add? No, I think as her last sentence stipulates, like the writing's on the wall. Yeah. And the reality is, especially when somebody, like, as a dude, I'm sure you could probably quantify what I'm about to say. But when somebody tells you, I don't want a relationship, you deserve better of that. And he knows he can't give me what I deserve. Yeah.

Motherfucker ain't change it. No. He's telling you, this was fun. I had a great time. Both of us did. But there's an expiration here. Yep. Because even when she said two years of dating, I was like, you're not dating.

You're just not fucking other people. Yep. That's the only agreement because it works for him. He's like, oh, I don't have to put myself out there and have to go take girls out to dinner and I'll have to do. I get what I want. I get the person, the convenience, I get to hook up and then they leave and I don't know them anything. Perfect. Perfect for this person.

But you see what I'm saying is perfect for them doesn't mean it's perfect for you. Neither of you are bad people. No one's right or wrong. It's just a misalignment. Absolutely. Okay. Hi, Sabrina. First off, I wanted to give you a big thank you.

I love your energy, your openness and vulnerability. He really enriched my life and accompanied me on my healing journey. I'm not crying or anything. That's a test of an onion in the room. But to my question, I've dated this guy and he was really sweet and had a great personality, but it just wasn't feeling a spark. Now I understand that's not what I'm supposed to be looking for anyways. But how do I know if I'm just not triggered by somebody and when I'm actually not interested?

I finally stopped seeing him because I didn't like his body scent. Oh, that's real. But I'm still wondering how to differentiate him between these two lines. Love Lisa from Germany. P.S. Hi to tech guy also. That's me. Okay, babe. Lisa.

You go first. I mean, it sounds like she just got the ick and didn't know how to get out of her head. That's what I read from this, that she was feeling certain things and used the low-hanging fruit of body scent as the reasoning why she broke up with him. Yeah. Fairmones are very real. Oh, no, no, I'm not discounting that at all. Very real. I actually had somebody had written in asking, like, this guy, and she was like, he doesn't like take care of himself.

I'm like, okay, well, there's a difference between hikes. This person, like, just doesn't take care of themselves. That's who they are versus, like, someone's body scent. It's like, when you started dating me, I had one. That's the Lummi ads that are very real because I love Lummi. And it's the only thing that fucking saved me was when we started dating, I had body odor because I was taking these electrolyte, whatever. They were like these ionic shots. And my neighbor who's super woo-woo, gave them to me.

And they were like super expensive, fancy hydration things. But the side effect was it. It didn't matter what I used. It didn't matter. I would take two showers a day and you would come into me and be like, Jesus Christ. Yes, but I also really liked you. That wasn't the straw that was going to break the camel's back. But it could have been.

That's what I'm saying. Like, if you had been in your, you know, if you were in your avoidant old brain of like finding an ick, finding a problem, that easily could have been something that you're like, it'll gross. Yeah, absolutely. Right. But that's why I said it feels like the ick is masquerading as the reason. I agree.

Okay. So let's talk about how do you know you're not interested versus it feels like uncomfortable. That goes back to our nervous system and checking in with ourselves and being self-aware. When I first started dating you, we were very different, obviously. Can't confirm. can't confirm. And I had even said, like, I'm not trying to change this person. I was like, but I need to see more. Like, if you have a vulnerable side, I need to see that. If you have these emotions, I need to see that. But if you had come to me and been like, I don't or like, I'm not willing

to show it. Okay, that's cool. Then like, we're not for each other. But when we first met, it wasn't that I wasn't into you. This was so new to me. I had never had somebody that had just been that consistent and showing up like that. And so I was enjoying my time with you. And I enjoy, when I was with you, I was having fun. When I wasn't, and I was trying to differentiate, I really had to stop and say, like my mom, my mom, mom said, if he was playing games with you right now, would you be more into him? And I just immediately was like, probably. I knew it. Because it was, there's a difference between, God, this guy's boring. I can't stand what he's saying. God, I'm not interested. I don't find any commonalities. I'm settling because my morals, ethos and ethics don't align. Very different

than there's one thing. Right. If that changed, okay, if his body odor changed, would you be interested in this person? Probably not. Anything you wanted to add here? No, I think that that summises it pretty well that there's a big difference between the ick and actual friction points that you couldn't build something off this. You also could have had a conversation with him about body odor or even just gifted him different soaps or colognes, things like that that you like and see if that helped. But it seems like you were looking for a reason and that reason that at least the surface level reason was the body odor. Right, especially because he was really sweet, great personality. And so it's like, okay, if you were physically attracted to him enough to go out on the date with him, that's where we have to look and say, oh, well, when it's safe, we usually find a really small reason to be like, nope, that's it.

And what that does is, like he said, Lisa, I was looking for a spark. And what that actually tells us is like, and this is no- chasing a feeling. Chasing a feeling, but this is no shame against you. It's like, then you might not actually be ready for a relationship in the sense where, like, if you're still chasing chaos or the highs and lows, that's nothing wrong. It's like, maybe just getting curious of, okay, when I meet somebody new, right? then I'm going to challenge myself to see if I can be okay with this discomfort and not have to end it or walk away. Now, again, follow your gut.

If you're like, no, dude, this isn't my person. Okay, it's not your person. Next, that's okay. But I would be curious to see if the next person you date that you like that if they have that where you feel the spark, okay, tell me the nature of that relationship. Tell me if it's healthy. Tell me if it's somebody that makes you feel seen, heard, and understood. If it is cool, then you made the right decision. And if it's not, you're like, you know what?

But if you notice, there's a pattern here, then let's explore it. Agreed. All right. Next. Oh, yeah. Okay. Hey, Sabrina. I'm a big fan of your work. We've chat a little analogy. Yay! Thanks, Karen. And would love you're and Ryan's take on my current situation. I was in a long-distance relationship, eye roll with a very sweet guy this summer for around four months.

We met up five times, been visiting each other's country, and every time we had an incredible time. He is so kind, caring, attentive, romantic, and hot. However, when we're apart back in our lives, the communication was literally like friends. We would chat most days by text or via Instagram, but it would be very superficial conversations. A few times I initiated deeper conversations, which he responded really well to, but after four months, this never change. And he even joked that at least he was still sending me memes. I realized that every time I asked for a phone conversation, he would disappear, sometimes for a day, sometimes longer. We spoke on the phone three times in the entirety of our relationship.

We need to have talks about the verbiage we're using. This is not a relationship. You know what I'm saying. When I finally got him to make time for the conversation, he opened up and admitted. did he finds emotional intimacy really hard because of his upbringing, that it spoils his relationship, but he didn't want to mess it up with me and we could work on it. He promised to call the next day and keep talking, and he didn't. Shocker of the year. Whoa, no way. Surprise and all. At this point, I step back and said, hey, you're clearly at capacity here, and I don't want to feel like I'm constantly

asking for your time, so let me know what you want to do. Fuck yeah. He was silent for five days. This massively triggered me, so I ended up respectfully via text. I regret that now. When he finally replied, it was just a long apology saying he was just mentally blocked and didn't know what to say because he let me down. I grew up with a mother who punished me with silence and I had told him that. I felt really upset and disrespected that he had done that. The very thing I had told him hurt me the most. Since then, we've remained friends. What? We talk most days, again, very superficial, but sometimes I wonder if I did the wrong thing and didn't give enough time to show up for me. Coming out of a relationship with an avoidant, has made me mistrust my own capacity for discernment, and I'm

wondering if I acted too fast and fumbled. Fumbled him. Fumbled him. But a strong part of me also feels like I couldn't make something work with somebody who couldn't handle phone conversations in between monthly visits. I'd love your view on this. Thank you, Karen. I'd love your view on this. Let's start off with the positives. Kudos on, hey, you're clearly at capacity here, and I don't want to feel like I'm constantly asking for your time, so let me know what you want to do. Great way to come from an I statement and also allow that person to show up. However, why is he still in your life after you? It's a great question, especially because you're still saying, I'm on sure. if I made the right choice. So you're coming at this saying maybe there's a chance. Correct. And

you asked if you fumbled him. The guy clearly did not show up in the way that you needed. So in what capacity would you have quote unquote fumbled him? No, this is repetition compulsion. Your mother used to treat you the same way. So you're hoping if you can get this guy to like you and to change and to treat you better, then see, look, all that pain's going to go away. And all it is is just reaffirming that these people are the same people like your mom. Absolutely. I don't know how else to say it. So here's my thing. With that, that's why I was like, we need to talk about what a relationship means. This sounds like it was more out of convenience. And that's okay, right? Like, it sounds like you had a good time in the moment, right? He's amazing. He's caring. He's hot. But he was not doing anything

beyond that. He was just keeping it enough until you guys saw each other again. And this is where I would even say off the bat, talking to somebody, this is the initial conversation of like, what is your bandwidth for a relationship of this dynamic? Because then off the bat, probably would have told you I struggle with emotional intimacy. Like, I don't know that I could do that. Then you make the decision there because then from, or if he said same bullshit of like, oh, no, I could do it. I'm ready. But then you see otherwise, maybe you have one more conversation of like, hey, you know, we talked about this. And now I'm seeing the contrary. We don't end up spending four months. And this five days of being super anxious, it's like the writing was on the

wall, unfortunately. I could have told you from the beginning this guy doesn't have the bandwidth for a relationship when you said the texting in between seeing each other for felt like friends. Absolutely. Just sending memes. I mean, at the end of the day, you're just the Spider-Man meme pointing at everyone and being like, oh, are you going to do the same avoidant behavior? Yeah. I remember the guy, the Utah guy, I love when people come back and say how proud they are of me. But the Utah guy was the same thing. I remember in between seeing each other, like, it was amazing. And then maybe every few days I'd hear from him, he would send a meme. And it was like very, I think in the two weeks we didn't see each other, I heard from him like a total of three times.

And that was that for me, like, the writing was on the wall. I was like, this guy's unavailable. Like he's not because what happened is they're not trying to deepen the connection. And again, I'm not saying you to text every day. But there is a level of excitement and the way you speak to somebody and the emotional availability we show up with. Absolutely. Was there anything else that stood out? No, those were the big ones for me.

You didn't fumble him. It's time for you to move on. Keep him in your life if you want to. my question to you is what value is he adding? Yeah, what do you get it? What's in it for me? Yeah. Surface level conversation and memes.

I'm sure you have other friends that can fulfill that need. Yeah, that you haven't had sex with. Right? That, like, you'll feel more comfortable and that's okay, right? Or if you're like, no, I really like this person as a person. But like, then maybe what that could also be is like why our friend that was just going through a breakup and they did the same shit where it was the same type of thing where it was a long distance.

It was like not, you know, it was a couple of months. It was in a crazy long. And he said, let's be friends. And my friend, fuck, yeah, to her. she finally lost it one morning and she was like, I don't want to fucking be his friend. And she told him, she was like, this doesn't work for me. This hurts me. Every time you contact me, I get excited. But then I realized like, it's not for what I want it to be because the excitement that we had is no longer. And really never was. Right. And then this kind of goes back into I've been learning about the default mode network. You know, me with my neuroscience. I'm always learning about things. And I'm like, okay, let me keep talking about it. But the default mode network is responsible for our, like, how we respond in relationships. So when you're on a. default mode, which is my mother talks to me like that that feels familiar. Oop, that equals love. So then this is, yay, this is a relationship, right?

Because a relationship is people that pull away. A relationship is people that don't really open up emotionally. A relationship is this. My nervous system understands this. And it's living in that chaos because maybe he's going to choose me. And then you spend time with him and then you go and you're dripping that dopamine and everything he's given to talk about a crumb. And then I see him again and, oh, okay, I get just enough to get me until the next time.

And it's a vicious cycle. Sure is. They'll fuck you up. I'll tell you that. Jump off the roller coaster, baby. Get off it, baby. I'm proud of you, Karen. Can we first off you say,

I think somebody once said, she felt like I was being mean, and I was like, okay, well, I'm going to say your show. But at the end of the day, all of this comes from a really deep-rooted place of love. We really want to help you.

And when we see stuff like this, we're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, cut the bullshit. You are a dime that's top of the line, if you know, you know. And you are worthy. You are deserving, but bitch, I need you.

you to fucking see that before you will see your life change. I need you to believe it before you see it. End of story. Thank you, period. AI is moving fast across the enterprise. But without visibility, it's just chaos. Different tools, different models, different teams using AI in completely different ways. Service now turns that chaos into control. With the AI control tower, you see all your AI across the business in one place. What it's doing, what it's done, and what it's about to do. So you stay in control. To put AI to work for people, visit servicenav.com.

Oh, there's a PDF. There's a PDF. A numbered PDF. We've got a lot of texts to go through. Yeah. Oh, it's Jimmy. Hi, Jimmy. I'm so excited.

Jimmy. I love you. I'm so excited. Okay. First off, love the show. And I'm totally an avid listener and a huge fan of yours. I love that you're so active on social and your listeners, especially me. For sure, I want to submit a question for In the Trenches.

Jimmy is the cutest. By the way, he always posts one of his cute merch and he's, I just love to me. Okay, backstory. I love you all, please. I just want to make sure I'm not paying favorite. So, you know a tad from what I've shared with you on IG. So this guy, let's change his name. Doug.

I don't want to give him. I feel bad. Real name, right? He's like, this guy fucking listened. And it was seeing, quote unquote, seeing for a bit decided to end things back in October. We first started talking a bit in February of last year and then we really started talking almost daily in May. We had some good combos at first and I liked where it was going.

He lived in Charleston and I live here in Austin. and we both agreed that long distance was on something we liked more on that later. So I decided that I liked where things were going. We were getting to know each other and we would FaceTime and chat as much as we could. He asked me to come visit him and I agreed since I work remotely and I can live anywhere or travel when I need to. So I went there for July 4th weekend and stayed for a few days. It was great. He was great. I felt comfortable around him, met his friends hung out, really had a blast.

After I left, we had some more convos and FaceTime dates and really connected despite the long distance. So I asked him if this, it was something he wanted to continue and he agreed that he felt a connection with me. So he offered to come stay a bit longer to see his everyday life and what it would be like if I lived there. Fair. So I drove up to Charleston from Austin, a 19-hour drive in August. Aye, kudos. That is commitment. Yeah.

I wasn't even fucking willing to drive an hour and a half to see your ass when we lived at Farber. Okay, sorry, everything was great. I offered to get an Airbnb, but he insisted that I stayed with him in his place since he had an extra room. And I also wanted it to feel like I wasn't living with him. So I slept in the spare room. Can we also just talk about the fact that I like sleeping in separate bed anyways, so like this would work for me? Sorry, I just wanted a side note. Making everything about me now. So in a spare room for like a week or two, so we could still have that space if I had decided to move here. He mentioned that his schedule is always booked. He had events, social gatherings almost every day except Tuesdays, which would be our date night. I was fine with that. I still got to spend time with him and his friends and I still got to spend time with him and I was ready to spend here in Austin and was ready to leave. I also took some time while I was visiting to look at places to live, since I know that could be a possibility if things worked out. I enjoyed the city and was ready for change either way. And I was born and raised here in Austin and was ready to leave. Pair. Fast forward to after I left. We talked about things and still had a great connection and had talk about the future of us. If I had moved, when would I be able to? Since I would be making that choice as he isn't flexible with his work life and whatnot, I thought about it, sat with it and gave him an answer that, yes, I'd be willing to move to give us a chance and see where it goes. I knew that things may or may not have worked out between us if I made the decision and I was upfront about that and as was he. I was okay with his schedule and knew that there was some flexibility in there too. So come September, I was getting things in order. Let him know I'd be moving mid-November.

book another flight to come see him in October before my move for his birthday, which was on the 15th. I planned on staying a week as if his friends had a gathering from that weekend and I planned a surprise dinner for him and his actual birthday and invited friends. That is so sweet. A few days before my flight, we got into an argument and ended things. Oh, okay. Wow, that we had so much explanation and then just, Jimmy, I mean, I need more. Okay. Finally, here's the question. I still go back and forth about what happened and what I did wrong. I blame myself for not sitting in letting things cool before responding. He's a big texter and I am too, but not about important things like feelings as text don't get. that across. I know there were some things that I said that I realized made me sound pushy and needy, and I acknowledged those. I feel like I was trying to move too fast in the relationship, but at the same time, I also almost felt pressured as he wanted to physically move their ASAP, me to physically

move there. I'll post a convo of what happened as it puzzles me that it ended so abruptly. I don't know if he was just afraid to commit or if he was really done. Now, judging from what he told me, different guy that I was talking to for like a week who reached out to him because I told him I wanted to take things slower, this one. I know that he, quote, unquote, dodged a bullet as he put, which the last part of his message to me was that I wasn't too much clearly a lie. I just want to know what clarity you have or what I can do to fully help move on from him. He didn't put in the effort. I wanted him to visit and meet my friends, and he told me he wouldn't be until March when his schedule freeze up. There were also a lot of things, but I feel like

he kind of strung me along. He became super cold at the end of it and made me feel worthless, and I know I'm not. Okay, baby. Let's get to these texts. I already have some fucking thoughts. Mm-hmm. I'll be blue. Okay. Is blue Jimmy? Yeah. Okay. So I'm Doug in black. Okay. He's cute. He's cute. I was just I was like he's adorable. And being Jimmy is so too. So it's like this would be cute. Okay. Fine, exclamation point. Fair enough. I'll grant you 10 points for honesty. Plus my 10 points I gave myself. Lots of love face emojis. I'm coming out ahead already. But you know I like when you tell me sweet stuffs. I do know that. But when you bring it up and make me do it in

parentheses, it feels fake. And you know how I don't like fake slash dishonesty. I can't fake it if you want. I can. Or I can fake it if you want or you can let it happen naturally like it usually does. I'm happy to do either. Ew. But we'll talk about this after. Well, I definitely don't want you to be fake or dishonest. Well, then know that I know that you like it. And I'm not going to be withholding it from you as punishment, but I like things to come and feel natural. Understandable. But knowing that words mean very little to you seems a bit contradictory. Words mean very little because people aren't like me. They will say things just because they think that they should or need to

and not because they are true and genuine. It's the reason words don't matter to me. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Does that make sense? Nope. Because I don't say things, just saying things and have zero meaning or feeling behind it. I'm always very genuine and back up my words with actions and consistency. But I can't know that's true.

Why trust what I can't know is true? That's why words mean so little to me. Ha, ha, ha, ha. Okay, Doug. There's a lot of ha-ha's happening. And also, I thought we had said we weren't going to have serious conversations via text. Okay. Ha-ha. Careful. I've shown you. I trusted your words when you told me you didn't do anything on your vacay. And like you just said, I can't know that's true, but I'm putting trust in your word that it is. But we are two different people. I'm not saying you can't trust people's words. I'm saying I can't. Oh, thank you for. Oh, well, it's just, it's not me. It's not you. It's me. Yeah, it's Doug logic. Yeah.

Well, do you trust me? Not yet. Okay. It's not something to be offended by. I did tell you this. Well, I am. That hurt a little bit. And no, you didn't tell me until just now.

I told you I don't trust the things that people say. I've said it a few times and I'm fairly certain. That part, yes, I'm well aware of that. I'm talking about me. Stop comparing me to the people in your past that lied to you. What good is a relationship without any trust? One, this isn't a relationship yet. Getting to know each other is an important point.

part of making a relationship and we don't know each other all that well yet. Two, I'm not comparing you to others. I'm telling you that this is who I am and that it's not a bad thing psychologically not to just randomly trust someone's word, especially when you don't know them. So stop gaslighting my mental barriers as though they're an attack on you personally. Three, I don't have trust issues once people earn trust. But again, I don't know you well enough to just trust you like that. Doug, I'm confused by your, the mental gymnastics that we're going through. Okay. One, I never said this was a relationship. I was making a statement. Clearly, we for sure don't know each other very well. It's been a few months. Two, I'm not saying trust everyone's word, but when I told you I was doing

something, a.K.A. coming to see you and I did it, that shows you actions. So cut me some slack. I'm not gaslighting or attacking you. Three, you're right. I don't know you all that well and shouldn't give you so much trust so easily. Just because you have said that you were coming and came, doesn't mean I should just come right out and trust you. You've also done things to break that trust. So as far as for your number three, I would agree with that. I know that you can trust me because I am hyper honest and trustworthy, but you can't know that for sure. So giving me unfaltering trust could be problematic. God, this guy's confusing. Me and him. Here's a word salad. Good luck. You can trust me, but I can't trust that you trust me. But if you trust me, then I can't.

It's like, wait, wait, who's trusting who right now? Because nobody. What point are we debating? Exactly. Yeah, you're right, but those are just words. My point, exactly. Oh, Jimmy. I can see why this would make you feel like you're going insane. I'll be sure to take your word to the queen of salt until I can trust you're actually honest. Thanks for the chat. If you're going to act like this, then this isn't going to work. You asked a question, I gave an honest answer. Debatable.

You were upset by the honest answer and are lashing out, and that's not okay with me. Okay, Mr. Morality, please. Yeah. The rigidity of this is where it's like it's being coming pretty clear the issues here. Like, okay, we'll get to that. I'm not lashing out. I'm merely trying to understand where you're coming from and understanding your feelings. This statement, I'll be sure to take.

your words with a grain assault until I can trust them that they're actually honest. Thanks for the chat. Isn't trying to understand where I'm coming from. It's aggressive and condescending. I mean, okay, it's passive aggressive. That's all it is. It's not condes. I don't think it's condescending. Do you? No. It's just it's passive aggressive of like, okay, well, like, it's a giving up. You're just like, all right, all, thanks for the fucking chat. You're right. It was. I apologize for saying that. I'm upset because I want this to work. But when you tell me that my words don't mean anything and that it makes me feel pretty belittled, I'm trying to understand your perspective of it, too. And I get that we don't know each other very well and trust is earned. So when we start to establish that,

my words will hopefully mean a bit more to you. When is someone going to pick up the goddamn phone? Holy shit. I was just thinking that. I was just thinking that. Why are we still? There's no tone. So we're create, look at us. We're creating these ridiculous fucking tones, especially you, because we have no tone. I'm Doug. All right, Doug, keep going. I appreciate the apology. And the latter of that statement is the truth. I love that he's the arbiter of truth.

Yeah. That's what the gas like. Oh, your reality is different than my reality. It's like, cool, that's called perspective. Also, if you don't think it's going to work, then we should agree to walk away. Based on what just conspired, I'm weary. I don't like being attacked for speaking a very calm and honest truth. You're texting. There was no malice in what I said, but you responded with malice in return. That's not what I'm looking for.

What? Well, maybe this is just not a good fit then. I'd hate to waste any more of our time. Okay. Thanks for the time you gave and for flying out and all. I hate that it didn't work. But happiness is key, and I know that there is someone out there for us. Hopefully the universe will send them our way sooner rather than later.

Three heart emojis. Thanks for the emojis. Thank you. You deserve it. I wish you the best. You too. And once this is all settled, I hope you know that I think that you're a great guy and would love to still be friends if that works out.

If not, I understand. I think I need some time in space. I wanted more than just a friendship. So did I. Well, you didn't act like you did. Based on what just transpired, you didn't either. Oh, God. I always wanted more.

I wanted you. Also, I stayed faithful to you, even though we aren't in a relationship while I was immersed in another country. You may think that's nothing, but ask my friends, that was huge. Well, but we can't trust anything he says, though. Yeah. Trust is earned. So, how would I trust your friends? Yeah. How would I trust you? Yeah. Who says you weren't getting dick down in Columbia? Exactly. I know that was huge. I've seen your socials. I'm scared. I'd love to see his socials now. Correct. You don't mistreat people you want to be with them. And I've stayed faithful to you. Comparison isn't the same. This fucking guy. Is this a joke? Is this a joke? Is this

actually a joke. I gave you so much of my time and effort. I tried to fit into your busy life and made it work. You didn't even come visit me. You didn't even know what day I was moving down and made plans even though I told you. Clearly, we are making good choices. You have a lot of resentment you were bottling up. I'm sorry, it didn't work out. Oh, that accountability. Ooh, that's sexy right there. This is your problem. Take care. You too. And then this was later. It says now this is a different day or later in the day. Oh, you stopped sharing location. Some of the things I wanted to tell you in person in or text, so it's more clear and not sounding like it's malicious. I have a bad memory, and if I don't put it in my calendar, I forget things.

Shrug emoji. I wasn't mad about it. I said it was fine, but I guess it doesn't matter anyway. But it wasn't fine if you're using it as a sword against me now. I wasn't trying to do that. I'm sorry if it came off that way. It did, but I'm glad it wasn't meant to be that way. I don't want this to be done, but I feel like the damage is already there now.

I was just going to say the same thing. The fracture has been made. I don't think it's wise to try and make things work. Sorry. I'm sorry. Me too. Yeah, my heart is pretty broken. I cared a lot about you. I hope you find the best person for you and they make you so much happier. And I hope the same for you. There is someone out there who's going to be a perfect in loving you, what the fuck, with the same fervor that you love. It's not too much. You're not too much.

Goodbye forever. Ha. I guess I can use that now. Hopefully not quote unquote forever, just for now, until the dust can settle. Three heart emojis. Okay, so then Jimmy says, and then of course, this is what happened when I was talking to a different guy recently who I had told I wanted to go slow. So he reached out to my ex, Doug, saying he knows. and sent me the screenshot of our convos, so totally contradictory what he said in his last message. Doug said, Yeah, he was a lot.

Very much so. You deaf dodged a bullet. I can see that now. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Okay. Wait, your friend is shit-talking you? No, this is a new guy he was dating. Oh, okay.

A new guy he was dating somehow found out about Doug and message Doug. The fuck. Okay. Oh, Jimmy, baby. Oh, Jimmy, baby, baby, Jimmy Bobby. Jimmy, Bobby. We've been watching Righteous Jamstones. Baby Billy, Lizzie.

Baby, Billy, Bobby, baby. Jimmy, baby. Jimmy, booby. Okay, let's talk. What the fuck. What the fuck was that? Oh, God. Why was that over text? Okay, yes, that's 100%.

So the first thing, the first thing that I noticed, even before we got to the text, because I was like, okay, let's save it, was this motherfucker's rigidity. It's like, oh, well, you're going to come here and, well, I'm busy. You have to do what my schedule is. Well, I have a very full schedule. It's like, okay. Don't you know how important I am? I'm Doug.

Yeah, it's like, well, but then maybe that would have been the conversation of like, now is not a good time to come. And it's like you were doing all of these moves and make everything was on his schedule. Well, I need you to be closer to me. But we're not in a relationship. No, no, no, no, don't you get this twisted? We're not in a relationship together. I said it three times in this text there, don't you know?

Yeah. And like the text, I mean, fuck. One, no wonder you're questioning your reality. This guy, talk about going in circles. He did everything to omit accountability. never stopping going, I could totally see how I confused you. I'm genuinely sorry. Do you want to have a call? Can we talk about this? Hey, I think we're lost in translation. I'm going to call you right now because this means something. Absolutely. In fairness, Jimmy also could have picked up the phone at any point. 100%. Yeah, what the fuck? This is clearly not coming a crossover text. Can we chat? 100%. I remember even like when you and I first started dating, it was like, it was my brother. It was that whole situation where like you made other plans without me. And I remember texting you being like, oh no, we're going to talk later.

And you were like, can we talk now? And I was like, nope. And we didn't tell you. You were like, we're not going to text anymore. You're like, okay, then I'll call you. And you called me two hours later after I was done with clients because I was like, I needed time. I needed my own time.

And we spoke on the fucking phone because you and I both knew the texting was, I was going to break it off. I was going to be like, fuck you, I'm done. Because there was no tone. I would have taken your dry ass fucking text as like, I don't care about you. You would have gotten Doug responses. No. Without the circular logic, quote unquote.

logic. And then you're gaslighting me and it's like, what? Cool, you learned some therapy terms. I don't think you're using them right. No, and this is where TikTok University bothers me of like, well, this isn't. It's like, oh, wow, you know, here's what I noticed, Jimmy. Dougie Boo was real quick to walk out real quick to be like, what, this isn't working then? Yeah. Oh, you're right. Too much has happened. We fractured that. Motherfucker, if you can't even just have a disagreement or something of like, hey, maybe we didn't, like, for him to be like, well, one, we're not in a relationship. And it's like, then two, what are we doing? Here's my itemized.

list of grievances. It's like to say that you're going to move to another state to be with someone. And I know you're saying I would have moved there anyways, but I'm imagining now you're not moving there anymore. To say that you would be. Otherwise, Charleston is going to be really awkward for you. Real awkward. And I knew that when I was moving down to San Diego. I was like, I'm moving. My sister's here. My friends were I'm like, I have things here. I wasn't just moving for somebody. And I was like, I'd only known you for a month. I'm like, if it works out cool and if it doesn't like, okay, I'm single. It's not the end of the world. It worked out. It worked out. Yay. But I would say we have to even look at the behavior, because I'm sure this is not the first time that these types of texts have happened where he doesn't take account of it. It doesn't just happen out of nowhere. But we also have to look and say, well, this is somebody triggered. Right. Now we get to see what someone triggered acts like. This is what I mean with you guys. When I'm saying, you got to see someone in different environments. And it's okay. Jimmy, we've talked online where he says, I think I'm a love addict. And it's like, that wouldn't surprise me because that's why you're dating people that are keeping you at bay and not really being intimate, flooding you with attention and

affection isn't intimacy. Big difference. Big difference. This type of stuff gets built over time to where then you would both feel safe to talk to each other. But that's, thank you. I had to do the mouth click because welcome to the videos where I say when someone says, I don't trust other people. It's because they don't fucking trust themselves. You cannot project your bullshit on, well, I don't trust anyone else. It's like, yeah, okay, but you're making that my problem. I didn't do anything for you not to trust me. Yeah, but I don't trust you. So it is your problem. Right. Because it's not good. Circular logic. Right. According to psychology, this is normal. And it's like, no, no, no, no, conditional trust is normal. Hey, I just met you. I don't know you. That generative AI response doesn't sound accurate. Remember, Chad GBT can be wrong at times. So, y'all, Jimmy, I love you, babes. And I do. I say this with so much love. You dodged a bullet. Talk about projection. And I'll be honest. If we're seeing that multiple people you're dating are talking like this about you, well, then maybe we do need to take just personal stock of like, okay, what is the common theme?

here. It's not that you're doing anything wrong. Okay, am I dating people that don't have any emotional bandwidth? So me communicating, oh, you dodged a bullet. He's a lot. Good. Good. Go find less. That's it. Go find less. That's great. Good for you. Ba. That's what I mean by taking stock, right? Is my side of the street clean? I can't control this. I can't control Dougie and his little boo-boo. But let that, fine. They both think you're too much. Then they're perfect for each other. Absolutely. And have these harder conversations quicker on before you're days away from moving I was supposed to say before you're fucking moving around. Okay.

Last bit, you want to do a profile? Let's do one. Okay. Monica, all right, girl. I've been your number of one listener for the past year. I think I've listened to 99 episodes, 99 problems, but the podcast probably is one because it's going to be, you don't have any more to listen to. Anyways, here's my profile.

If you do pick it, please lay it on me. Rip this profile apart, clearly something ain't working with love, Monica. Okay. And guys, we are working to expand the show and have these come up on the screen. We'll cover their faces so that, like, they don't feel so. like exposed, but we are going to try to have these pop up just for now. Maybe we don't, maybe we don't. I don't know.

We'll see. So for now we'll go. Okay. First photo, Monica, looking over the shoulder. Yes. Coy. Coy. Second, video.

Let me teach you how to and I have no idea what she's, oh, is that a well? Oh, she's chopping wood. Okay. Okay. First round is on me if, pick a number one through 100. Then there's a photo of her doing more construction, holding that. There is a selfie. Seems like the same tank.

I do notice these things, y'all. She does. I do. And then my simple pleasure, wet dog noses, puns, ultra-thin-slice turkey. I get that. She's in front of a car that says, carry gold. This is butter. I'm looking for a hunter-gatherer.

There's a cute photo of her in a red dress. I like that dress. And then there's one at a beer garden. Okay. Babe, what are three things you remember from this profile? Go. No, that's what I get to say. Okay.

Okay, here you go. She likes wet-noses, thinly sliced turkey, and she's looking for a hunter-gatherer. Oh, okay. I thought you were going to ask me. I was like, I remember butter. I remember butter. I remember she does a lot of work. Like she's very hands on, which is super cool.

And she has a nice smile. I remember that. Layed on me, babe. I mean, the biggest issue with this profile overall is personal disclosure. You listed out three things that you like and that you want to hunter gather. And that's it. And that's a story. And like, let's be honest, I don't know what a hunter gather means.

Does that mean you want like a rugged guy that's going to go out and literally hunt and gather for you? So are you like, where do you guys live? What is that? Because hunter gather, it's like in theory, like somebody that protects me and like, does stuff or like that literally goes out and hunts and gathers food. But then what are you doing? Are you building the house? I'm confused. It's also a terrible paradigm to even present because historically, men were predominantly hunters. They gathered when hunting was unavailable, trapped small animals, things like that. Women were prominently doing the gathering. So that's where I'm like,

I'm a little confused. It's like, is this mean you want a traditional man? Like I think, I'm curious, as a dude reading it, what did you see? Because you used to look at these profiles. And nothing. Well, she's beautiful photos. Very stunning. But there isn't an aioda of personal disclosure on her profile. You aren't presenting anything of substance about you that someone can resonate with and actually start a meaningful conversation. Because, okay, pick a number one through 100. Go. It's a fucking horrible prompt. And I don't mean that to be. Give me a number. 69. Of course you did. Right. But I, that's probably the most. Something you're going to say. Sixty nine with a stupid smiley face or like the crying face emoji.

Yeah. And it's like, you know, So what am I supposed to say back to that? Cool. My number was 28. Yeah. Okay. How's your day? Right?

Like, where are you going to go with that? It's a terrible workflow. You're setting yourself up for failure and inviting low effort bullshit. You're not learning anything of substance. You're not making this, or the reader put an iota of effort into this. You're not using the prompt intentionally. Photo-wise. I like her photos.

I think the first photo we could have something stronger than the over-the-shoulder because it's- The Beerstine or the red dress. Yeah. 60% of people make a determination based solely on your primary photo. The photo itself is cute, and I would absolutely keep that on your profile, but I wouldn't use that as your primary photo where your body position is not faced towards the camera. Agreed. I think I like the red dress one.

It's stunning. She looks stunning. Yes. The beer garden, my only concern is like, unless you're a big drinker, that could really attract the wrong partner. If somebody's like, oh, that beer garden, right? Oh, so let's go good and pint. And you're like, oh, no, no, no, this is Octoberfest.

I don't actually do this. then maybe we should like preface something like that of like out of my natural habitat or something like that so that people don't think like oh okay let's go get a beer and you're like I drink once a year that'd be my only thing but I definitely agree I think the butter photo don't get it I don't get why you're leaning or you're pointing to a car that says carry gold maybe I thought if your name was it or that would be one thing if you sent it to a friend whose name is carry or I don't know I mean you look cute but like we could do a better workout photo I think we could do better and for the whole by simple pleasures again tax terrible. There's not an iota of conversation fodder in there. You're not presenting anything that someone can start a meaningful conversation with you off of. You want pun, but you didn't give me a pun? Right. Right? You want puns, but I didn't get a pun. Exactly. You're either going to get someone being like, oh, I like what dog noses or just a shitty pun. Yeah, they're like, I don't know what to do with this. Exactly. All of your prompts, the onus is going to be on you based off of the low effort bullshit that someone is writing in a first message. You have to either, accept.

the connection on hinge and just put that into the ether and have that person double message you, or you have to pick up and start a meaningful conversation with that person. From a workflow perspective, I would recommend re-architecting that. Of course, it's a workflow perspective. Yeah, I would say, like, I like, I like the video of chopping wood. It's like, you could put that last. Like, I remember when I had mine, I had my deadlift video of me deadlifting at the gym and I was like, I look good. I'm doing it. So many dudes responded to that, especially being like, oh, it's gold. Like, yeah, yeah, I think I've seen you there. Shogger. But I like showing something. Like, I don't mind. showing that active or I think it's cute like the gun it's like but lead with your really strong

photos because here's the thing. Do you know pick up on this? You want a hunter gatherer but all you're showing here is that you take care of yourself. Look, I'm building something myself. Look, I'm chopping wood. Look, I'm at the beerstein. But yet you want a hunter gather. There's a disconnect. Yeah. You're displaying hunting activities. You're displaying that you're the hunter gatherer that you're, I hate the masculine feminine thing, but like you're stepping more into the like, I'm a rugged outdoorsy girl, which I love. But then how does the hunter gather fit into that? Couldn't agree more. The first prompt needs to be completely replaced. I'd pick a number one through 100. What the fuck is that?

There isn't anything of substance on your profile. The first prompt should be basically an about me replacement. Talk about your hobbies, interest and passions. Talk about what you love and what makes you unique. Yeah, I couldn't agree more. Is there anything else that we missed on this profile? No, I would also get rid of my simple pleasures. I don't think that that's doing you any services. I would recommend because all of your prompts invite low effort bullshit. I would replace. I would replace. place them with something that invites high effort. Use the one thing that I'd like to know about you prompt. Ask a poignant question that also acts as a filtering mechanism so you can immediately judge match capability and see if that's someone that you even want to respond to.

And it's okay. You can also have fun. These don't have to be super fucking serious. Like mine was, one thing you should know about me is I ate dinner to dick a dessert. So let's make sure we're on the same page. And snacks from my bag are always a must. Am I right? That was one that was like fluffier, right? I had one that was more depth. But the thing was you were learning about me. you know me about. What do you know about me now? Out of that prompt. But she did actually get to dessert. Yeah, all the time. I have a cupcake tattoo. Very serious about that. And I have snacks.

Like, crumbs in my bed. In my pockets, there's always candy. Like, I have always have a snack with me. She's an old lady with her where there's originals in her pocket. 100% going to. Except it's just chocolate. Yes. And every time we go to the grocery store, I'm like, what snacks do we have? So I set that. That's why I'm saying, like, it was something very real about me. And like, I cannot tell you. I didn't respond to that one. No, you didn't. tell you, no, I know what you responded to when you fucking tried to say that you were like, you were of New Yorker and I was like, you're not from New York. It was cute, but you're not.

Love you. But no, my point being is like, you still learned something about me. And I had so many first dates that were dessert dates and it was really fun because the amount of dudes that were like, have you been to this place. I was like, I didn't know that they were known for that. And like, we'd go get dessert, have a bite. Like, it became something that at least it wasn't a cocktail. It wasn't a drink. But it was also about me so that I could manage expectations in case you're like, oh, I hate dessert. It's like, well, we're not sharing it then. I would also recommend changing up the hunter-gatherer. I don't think that that's serving her. Use the prompt I'm looking for, but actually articulate what you're looking for in a partner. Talk about attributes that you're looking for, not just a list of things that you want someone to do for you. Yeah. And stop. Like, the biggest thing I'll kind of end at this. I'm sorry, actions that you're seeking from a partner, not just a list of attributes.

I will end it with this. What we also have to remember is that most people are not very good at self-diagnosis. And so when we put on there like, I'm looking for somebody that's super self-aware, that's emotionally available. That's all of these things. It's like, the average person is going to come to and be like, I'm that, I'm that person, right? And this is what I was looking for. So this was a study that I spoke about on the solo last month, whenever the fuck this comes out. And it's a cognitive bias that explains why people overestimate their emotional intelligence. So it was a study done by Kruger and Dunning found that people who lack skills in a certain area tend to overestimate their competence, meaning you might think you're emotionally mature when you're not. So people will say, like, I'm ready for a healthy and mature relationship, but yet when like the real shit happens, vulnerability, transparency, self-awareness, accountability, they pop out. And so that's why we have to be careful when we put on there of like, I'm looking for all of these things, a person that does it. It's like, you think that you- I identify as six foot, so I put six foot. Right. Yeah. It's like, well, I am thus. I feel thus. There I am. And so no, what we want. want to remember is like, I'm looking for somebody who is like really, like for mine, it was like, I'm looking for someone growth minded that doesn't get scared by vulnerability that is really excited about having deeper conversations of different, like I showed the depth that I was coming to. And I cannot tell you how many motherfuckers used to comment on that response and be like, this is a breath of fresh air. I very rarely see people speak like this. So try it. Do that.

Be the weird one. Be the outlier so that your weirdo can find you. that note, goodbye. And on that note, guys, thank you for another week of being in the trenches with us. We love doing this. It's so fun to be able to hang out with you guys and actually help and really, because I want you guys as you're listening to be like, oh, fuck, I've done that. Oh, shit, that's me. And it's okay.

We're creating a safe community. But don't forget, in the trenches at suprinozohar.com. If you guys need anything, we are here for you. Take a note out of Jimmy's playbook and send the screenshots as an attached PDF. It helps tremendously. And numbers. Especially sequentially numbered so that I'm not having to guess and try and parody match how these texts are supposed to go. Yeah, we got one and it was, I think, like, 19 pages of text.

And we were like, I didn't know. I got nothing for you. We had nothing because none of them made sense. There was none of them even, there wasn't a through line. So it was like, wait, are these different conversations? Like the name was changed three times within the screenshots. One time the guy was called Big Daddy. Well, we love.

Thanks, guys for screenshots. Guys, thank you for sitting with us. Please don't forget to rate review the show. Follow along on all the socials. Follow along, subscribe on YouTube. Thank you for sitting with us for another week. Until next time.