The School of Greatness - 11 Habits To Completely Turn Your Life Around - Solo Round EP 1147
Episode Date: August 9, 2021Today’s episode is all about the 11 habits Lewis has cultivated in his life that has led to him feeling more fulfilled, happier and healthier. Building new habits isn’t easy, but you can trust tha...t if you implement even just a few of these into your life, you’ll start to see the shift in areas that are causing you stress and frustration. It’s all about putting yourself first and showing up for yourself, so that you can show up for the world and everyone else as the best version of yourself.In this episode Lewis discusses how to create a vision for your life, how to have a positive attitude when everything is going wrong, how to create healthy relationships, the importance of physical and mental health, how to take responsibility for your life, and so much more!For more go to: www.lewishowes.com/1147MILLIONAIRE MORNING GUIDE - https://www.themillionairemorning.com/The Wim Hof Experience: Mindset Training, Power Breathing, and Brotherhood: https://link.chtbl.com/910-podA Scientific Guide to Living Longer, Feeling Happier & Eating Healthier with Dr. Rhonda Patrick: https://link.chtbl.com/967-podThe Science of Sleep for Ultimate Success with Shawn Stevenson: https://link.chtbl.com/896-pod Â
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This is episode number 1147 on the happy and healthy habits to change your life.
Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned
lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message
to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness.
Thanks for spending some time with me today.
Now let the class begin. Malcolm Gladwell said, practice isn't the thing you do once you're good.
It's the thing you do that makes you good. And Hal Elrod said, let today be the day you give up
who you've been for who you can become. I'm excited because today's episode is a solo round
and it's about the 11 habits
I've personally cultivated in my life
that have led me to feeling more fulfilled,
more happier, and healthier.
Building new habits isn't easy,
but you can trust me that if you implement
even just a few of these into your life,
you'll start to see the shift in areas
that are causing you stress and frustration.
And it's all about putting yourself first and showing up for yourself so you can show up for the world and everyone else
around you as the best version of yourself. And in this episode, we discuss how to create a vision
for your life, how to have a positive attitude when everything is going wrong, how to create
healthy relationships, the importance of physical and mental health, how to take responsibility for
your life, and so much more. And if you're enjoying this, make sure to share this with
someone that you think would be inspired to hear this as well. You can send them the link
lewishouse.com slash 1147, or just copy and paste this link wherever you're listening to this
podcast. And if this is your first time here, please click the subscribe button over on Apple
Podcast and leave us a review of the part you enjoyed the most about this. Okay, in just a moment, it's time to develop the habits
that will give you a happier and healthier life. I want to talk about the 11 habits to change your
life. And these are really the habits to help you increase your happiness. Now, some people like to
wait and see if happiness will ever just happen
to them maybe one day they'll wake up and suddenly be happy and everything will be fantastic but
unfortunately that's not just how life works and we all know it doesn't work like that in order to
be happy we must first have to be intentional about creating a better lifestyle and that starts
with habits so today i want to go over the 11 habits that have transformed my life that I
believe will help you build a happier, healthier, more loving life for yourself
as well. And habit number one is to create a vision and life-fulfilling
goals. Now this is something that I talk about in my book. It's one of the first
principles in the School of Great greatness is really creating a clear intentional vision. And without a clear vision, you'll end up running
in multiple different directions instead of staying focused on what truly matters in your life,
your relationships, your health, and your business. And this can lead to your success being delayed a
lot longer than it needs to be. And so you really want to get clear and intentional. And you can have a different vision at every different
stage of your life when you're 10 years old or when you're 50 years old. But it's
important to have a clear vision. Without that you'll just be kind of wandering
around. And when we're wandering we feel aimless. And when we feel aimless we feel
like what's the point? What's the purpose? What's the intention for me being here?
And that causes a lot of stress and anxiety when we have those thoughts.
So in my life, when I wasn't clear on my vision, I was really running around and stressed out
a lot.
I was like, what should I be doing?
I don't know.
I don't feel good enough.
I don't feel worthy.
I don't feel like I matter.
And those thoughts really don't help me improve the quality of my life.
And a question someone had asked me is, what was your life like when you didn't have a clear vision
versus when you created one for the school of greatness?
And for me, I remember different moments in my life.
It was mostly in transition when one goal was finished,
when one dream had ended,
whether it be sports dreams or business ended.
It's kind of like the transition period
where I was like, well, what do I do next?
And it's that discovery phase of the transition where you get to get clear. Start doing the things that you really love. Do
the hobbies, hang out with people you love to spend time with, travel, do the things you've
always wanted to do and do them to the best of your ability. When you do that, you'll start to
spark ideas. Things will start to come to you naturally. And that's what I really did in between
transitioning before the School of Greatness into the School of Greatness. I was living my life. I was playing
sports. I was being active with friends. And that process, I remember going through transition
thinking, you know, I wish there was more tools when I was growing up that would help me overcome
the different challenges that I would face with my life. I wish there was a School of Greatness
that could teach me about all these different things. And that was the spark in the transition from one business to the next on why I created
the School of Greatness. And the mission now is to serve 100 million lives weekly to help them
improve the quality of their life. And we do that through a lot of the things that we do in the
School of Greatness. But I'm very clear on the vision and on the mission. It's very intentional. I wake up every day thinking about
it and I act based on vision. Without that vision, I would act based on, well, what am I supposed to
do? I'm not sure. I don't feel good about myself. I have no direction. And again, when we have no
direction, we're just kind of wandering around in a circle and that doesn't help us move forward.
It doesn't help us grow. So have a clear vision. I don't care if the vision is for one month or for 20 years.
Have something you're working towards
that will help increase the happiness
and the quality of your life.
Habit number two.
This is something I learned in sports early on
is to have a positive attitude when things go bad.
Now, the world is filled
with a lot of different negativity, drama, stress
and sometimes it's hard not to fall victim to joining in on the negativity.
This is one of the reasons why my father growing up would not let us watch the
news. He would not let us watch commercials that talked about a lot of
harmful things or the news because he didn't want us to be susceptible to
hearing about things that maybe are happening in a micro level that are of harmful things or the news because he didn't want us to be susceptible to
hearing about things that maybe are happening in a micro level that are
blown out of proportion that seemed like it's happening all over the world but
it's really only happening in a small level. He didn't want us to emphasize on
all this negative energy and this negative attitude so he eliminated those
thoughts from our mind to support us in the positive. In sports as well I would would also have coaches that, you know, things wouldn't always go our way.
And I used to be so negative.
I used to be so reactive when I missed a shot, when I dropped the ball, when I messed up,
when something that I did was wrong or was a mistake.
I used to beat myself up so much.
Or when we'd lose, I was such a sore loser.
I'd have such a bad negative
attitude. And our coaches over the years would really teach me like that isn't helping you. That
isn't supporting you or your teammates around you. But having a positive attitude when things go
wrong will lift your teammates up, will lift you up to help you improve for the next play in the
next moment. It's really all about having that positive attitude because the negative doesn't usually serve us for anything ever. There are times, absolutely,
to speak up and be a stand for when bad things are happening to you or happening
to other people or around you, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm not
talking about that specific moment in time. I'm talking about spending hours of
your day thinking about yourself negatively and thinking about the world negatively around you. Just ruminating on how negative
everything is. That prevents you from showing up as the best version of
yourself. And I believe you're robbing yourself and your loved ones and the
world of your gifts and who you truly are when you sit in that negative state.
So when I began to shift
into having a positive attitude, it really helped me in every area of my
life. And negative things or things that I don't like happen around me all the
time. But it's a practice even today. And when I'm hit with these adversities or
these obstacles, I try to ask myself how could it possibly serve me in the future
or if it's worth putting so much energy into it around a negative attitude, is it really worth it?
Is it helping me and my health?
Is it helping me in my joy and my love for others and my love for myself by holding on to this negative energy?
It's usually not worth the energy. So why do we do it so frequently?
You know, there's this book called don't sweat the small stuff
Because it's all small stuff, you know, obviously there's adversity know there's this book called Don't Sweat the Small Stuff because it's all small stuff. You know obviously there's adversity and there's
challenges but when you can have the attitude around it, it really shifts your
life and the people around you. So you've got to do the work to develop that
awareness to realize that for yourself. This isn't easy, this took me a long time
and having a positive attitude is in opinion, one of the most important things to
manifesting, to attracting, to feeling better about yourself. But one thing that I've learned
from the different guests and the experts on the show in the last few years is that what's most
important is getting to the root of what's causing you the stress, the pain, the anxiety,
the negative feelings that you're having. Because positive affirmations can
only get you so far if you're not also doing the deep work on what's really going on, what's
underneath the trigger, the anxiety, the fear. Dr. Caroline Leaf has been on the show a couple of
times. I really love her message and her expertise. She said, it's like putting a band-aid on a bullet
wound when you're just trying to have a positive affirmation
without actually going to the root cause of what that trigger and negativity is.
But if you're able to get to the roots of some of the things causing you so much pain and suffering
and the negative attitude that you have and then begin working to stay positive and having an abundance mindset,
to stay positive and having an abundance mindset, that's when you can really start to create real change and start to see and notice the feelings of positivity, notice the feelings of happiness
flood into your heart, into your body, into your soul. And that's what this is all about.
So habit number three is an important one. It's all about giving back, volunteering your time,
important one. It's all about giving back, volunteering your time, helping others, mentoring,
coaching, being of service in any way possible that you can. And you might have heard me share this before, but if you're going to be addicted to anything in life, be addicted to service.
I believe it's not addicted in the negative sense, but if you're going to be committed to
doing something and living an intentional practice, be intentional on the act of serving other people.
And in whatever way that works for you, whatever you have to do, do that for you.
It's been my mission since the beginning of this show.
And every single day I aim to show up and give back to you, to people watching, to people
listening, my friends and family, my team members, and anyone possible that I can.
And it's very important for me.
And it also brings me a lot of joy when I can know that something I did caused a positive
impact on someone else's life.
Whether it be a piece of content, someone I interviewed, something they said, something
I said, a way we put it out there that connected with people.
That brings me so much joy.
It brings me so much happiness knowing that my life has had meaning on one person's life.
And it continues to feed and fuel my fulfillment and my soul every day.
And that's why I continue to be committed to habit number one, which is the vision and staying true to that vision. And in a New York Times article by Tara Parker Pope, she wrote that several studies suggest
that supporting others helps buffer our bodies against the detrimental effects of stress.
And a five-year study of 846 people in Detroit found that stressful life events appeared
to take a greater toll on people
who were less helpful to others, while helping others seemed to erase the detrimental physical
effects of stressful experiences. Now for me, that is crazy to think that those who were more
self-centered, who weren't focusing outward and trying to help other people,
those that were only thinking about themselves, not helping others, had more physical pain and ailments based on the stressful environment. Whereas those who were focusing out, that started
to go away. And for me, that says something about how service is truly important in our lives.
Habit number four is a big one, something I do all the time, is to express gratitude
and appreciation.
This may seem like so basic.
This may seem like the dumbest thing because it's so simple, but it will transform and
change your life.
And when we appreciate everything that we already have, not focusing on all the things
that we don't have, but appreciate the things we already have. It puts us in a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity. And
this is huge because gratitude drowns out negativity and it brings positivity
into our lives. It puts us into perspective in the moment of what is
meaningful, what we have created, what we have, the people in our life right now.
And we can channel that positive energy into everything we're doing and we can
shift that positive energy into our vision and our mission. And I can't speak for everyone, but gratitude
has been life-changing for me. It's something, again, that I do every day. It's non-negotiable.
When I wake up, it's on my voicemail. When someone calls me, I say, tell me what you're
grateful for and I'll get back to you. In our team meetings, we talk about it. When we start
a meeting, what are you grateful for today? It's just something when I go to bed at night I
express three things I'm grateful for. All these things help me continue to
stay in the present moment, not focused on the past of what I did or how
mistakes I made. Not worry about the future but really be present and that's
the key to being happy is focusing on what you have right now and the people in your life.
And many other psychologists that I've interviewed on this show tell me that gratitude is proven to create a happier life.
This isn't just some fluffy woo-woo, you know, personal development thing.
This is now science.
It's been researched.
It's been studied and proven that gratitude
decreases depression, increases happiness in people's lives. So don't let gratitude be
something you just do from time to time or once in a while or on a holiday or Thanksgiving.
You need to find time and place to do it every single day. And the more you do it,
the more frequently you do it, the happier, healthier,
more fulfilled you will be. And it'll put your life in perspective. It'll get you out of the things you don't have and focus on things you do have. The simplest way to do that is just to add
gratitude to the start of something you're already doing. We talked about this, what will I do?
We do it before team meetings. You could do it while you're making coffee. You could do it right
before you eat every meal. You could do it when you wake up, when you go to bed. Whatever you're about to start something, have a moment.
It could be five seconds. I'm grateful for this moment. I'm grateful for this thing. I'm grateful
I have this. And really be intentional on that. Spend a few minutes and use that time wisely to
express gratitude. For me, again, I wake up every morning and I express the things that I'm
grateful for. I really just wake up and say thank you. Thank you for another day. Thank you for my
health. Thank you for the people in my life. Thank you for the challenging times that have helped me
grow and improve myself. I try to say thank you for it all. And that really supports me in the day.
And you'll be able to love deeper. You'll create more light for other people.
And you'll appreciate the little things around you more than ever. I'm telling you,
a ritual of gratitude will change your life. Again, it seems so basic. It might seem like so,
you know, this is not some crazy life hack or some thing, some app or something that's going
to switch something on in your brain. This is just going back to the basics to help you improve your happiness. Habit number five is to
create healthy relationships with boundaries. I didn't know what a boundary was until really a few
years ago in certain areas of my life. And personal boundaries are essential in healthy relationships
because they provide the foundation for your expectations, behavior,
and how you communicate with others. Sometimes setting the limits can be challenging and
difficult, especially if you want everyone to be happy around you. Now, raise your hands
if you are a recovering people pleaser like me and you want everyone to like you, you want everyone
to be happy around you, you don't want anyone to ever be mad at you for anything.
That's been me pretty much my entire life up until recently when I learned how to create
healthy boundaries and know that I'm going to disappoint people. But the most important person
that I'm not going to disappoint is myself. And I was always abandoning myself to try to please
others. And I was hurting myself in the process. And you should never hurt yourself.
You obviously don't want to hurt others, but you should never hurt yourself. And we often react differently
when we don't get what we want or when what is happening around us isn't what we
expected. When that expectation kind of hangover happens to us. Results in frustration or hurt feelings.
I know. I know the feeling. You expect someone to say something or do something. They don't do it. Results in frustration or hurt feelings. I know,
I know the feeling. You expect someone to say something or do something, they don't do it.
You get let down, it hurts. That's why communication is so important. And whether it's an intimate
relationship, a family member, a business relationship, when the boundaries we have
set are not met, we feel violated. Or for myself, I felt abused, taken advantage of,
and all these different things. And that doesn't feel good I understand those feelings they
don't feel good so when you create a standard create a boundary you've got to
communicate and talk about your expectations in that communication
process sometimes this can be extremely challenging and difficult conversations
especially if you've never done in the past. And oftentimes boundaries are not discussed and that can cause bitterness and resentment. And if
you take the proactive approach by discussing boundaries with your partner, you can avoid a
lot of that pain and stress and disaster. So I highly encourage you to be willing to be
uncomfortable in those boundary conversations. And I loved this moment that I had when I interviewed
conversations. And I loved this moment that I had when I interviewed Nedra Tawwab. And she said,
she's like the boundary expert. And she said, when we think about boundaries, we think about them as something with someone else. But a boundary could be a morning routine. A boundary could be having
some quiet time after lunch. It's not just all these things that we need other people to do.
after lunch. It's not just all these things that we need other people to do. It's also what we need to do with ourselves. And I think it's so important
for us to reflect on what are the boundaries we're keeping with ourselves.
Not about significant others or family or friends. What are the boundaries of
integrity you're keeping with yourself? So think about that for yourself and the
boundaries you want to set in the specific relationships in your life. And really, are any of them
being crossed already? What are the places in your life where you feel like
boundaries are already being crossed? Make a list. Write these down. And are
you not respecting the boundaries yourself? Are you crossing boundaries that
you shouldn't be crossing with someone else in your life? It's a difficult thing
to do, especially if you've never really thought about them. But when I began setting boundaries in my life, as well as started to
hear about the importance of them from different therapists and psychologists that we've interviewed
on the show, it made a huge difference in my emotional, mental, physical well-being as well.
Because really, when you think about boundaries, when an emotional, mental, spiritual boundary feels crossed, you almost feel it in your body. I know I did. I would feel
tightness, tension. I would have like eczema flare-ups when a boundary was crossed and I
didn't know how to handle it. And you feel the boundary being crossed emotionally and it
physically manifests. So this will continue to help you be happier and physically healthier when you create boundaries.
Which leads me into habit number six, which is to take care of your physical health.
Work out, eat clean, physical and mental health.
The emotional and mental stress can really lean into the physical damage if we don't
have a clean, healthy relationship with the mental and emotional side of ourselves,
creating boundaries and all that other stuff.
But taking care of your body consistently, moving your body, exercising is so important for your overall physical and mental health.
We've had so many different experts come on and talk about the research and the science of how physical movement increases happiness,
increases dopamine,
makes you feel more confident, all these things. Being stagnant for two weeks and not moving your
body will make you feel less and less confident, make you feel weak, and all those different
feelings will create stress and anxiety in your life. When you don't exercise, you're not giving
your body the clarity it needs. It's not cleansing itself It's not moving and you've got to move in order to get you closer towards your desired goals as well
So you got to think about these things. What does your body need?
It's it's something that I've started talking about
More and more as I've started to integrate this more and more in my life and I started taking boxing lessons a couple times a week
Six months ago.
And it's transformed my physical and mental health.
You might have to reassess, like, are the physical activities I'm doing right now supporting me?
Or do I need to mix it up?
Do I need to try something new?
Do I need a new challenge?
That's what I did with boxing. I've been able to lift and run and play sports my whole life.
But I felt like I needed something to shift me physically,
and boxing was something I'd never done,
something that was challenging, it's mental,
it's emotional and physical,
and it's one of the hardest workouts I've ever done.
So I go early in the morning, and I do that
because that's been huge for me,
because it means I can take care of the most important
and often the hardest things first,
which set up the rest of my day for success.
And when I finish a workout early in the morning,
and I realize, wow, there's still a lot of people that are asleep,
who haven't gotten up, who haven't done anything,
and I'm finishing one of the hardest things of the day for me,
that brings me joy, that makes me a better human,
that makes me feel more confident, makes me feel happier,
that detoxes things that I need to let go of.
When I do that, I feel like, wow, what's next? Whates things that I need to let go of. When I do that, I feel
like, wow, what's next? What is there that I need to do? I can do anything. Bring it to me. I will
take on the world today. And when you start the day with that momentum, it really supports you
with your overall happiness. Now, if you're not often physically active, don't overwhelm yourself
and say, I'm going to do two hours a day of activity and I'm going to go crazy here and I'm
going to sign up for all these classes because you'll burn
out quick or you'll hurt yourself.
You can start as small as just going for a 10, 20 minute walk around the block five days
a week and really get started.
Just get yourself moving on the process of consistency.
And even if you're making small progress, that progress is signaling your brain of the
changes that you are wanting to make.
And again, 5, 10, 20 minutes a day will eventually be 30 and 60 minutes a day and will continue to
build and compound over time. So don't overwhelm yourself by thinking you have to go extremely
crazy right off the bat and I'm going to eat perfect seven days a week. I'm going to train
like a machine and I'm going to get 12 hours of sleep and all these things. You're probably not going to be able to sustain that within two weeks. But getting started
and being consistent is the key. So anything is better than nothing when it comes to moving your
body. And the next thing is really to focus on your diet. I know when I'm not eating clean
consistently, I kind of take the 80-20 approach for nutrition and food. 80% of the time I try to
eat as clean and healthy and organic as possible. 20% of the time I'm traveling the weekends. I have
more sugar and desserts and things that I know aren't the best for fuel for my body, but they
taste good and I give myself that balance. And you can work out all you want, but you can't
They taste good and I give myself that balance.
And you can work out all you want, but you can't outwork your mouth.
That's for sure.
You cannot outwork your mouth.
You can train for an hour and then if you're having all this cakes and cookies, it's not going to do anything for you.
You're actually not doing any favors for yourself.
You might be maintaining, but you're not really improving.
And our guests all the time talk about eating things like, I've asked so many different
scientists, doctors, and nutritionists about the top food you should be eating.
And they all consistently say blueberries, foods that are high in omega-3 fatty acids
like salmon and walnuts and avocado oil, dark chocolate.
The list goes on and on from there.
Leafy greens, all that stuff.
But eating more of those things,
adding more of those things into your body will support you.
And you don't want to put in so much effort
in your workout routine
and then just go have alcohol and sugar
and pizza every night.
That's not gonna really support your growth.
You can have cheat meals in moderation
or you can just call it balanced meals in moderation
if you don't wanna call it cheat meals. I if you don't want to call it cheat meals.
I do the balanced 80-20 kind of percent rule.
And having a clean diet will not, but having a clean diet will not only serve you physically
in your health, but also in your mental health.
Because we've talked about so many different experts who have come on and share that the
foods that actually increase your mental health and affect your mood. We've had
a lot of these different doctors and nutritionists come on and talk about that. And when you're eating
poorly, it can increase the feelings of depression, anxiety, and stress. And I believe we're starting
to really understand more about how much our diet really affects us, how much food really can either
hurt us or heal us. So for your future self,
it's best if you focus not only on putting your body through the workouts, but also giving your
body the cleanest foods possible to eat. Which brings me to habit number seven, the power of
breathing. This is something that I really started to practice in sports, but didn't start to really learn how to, I wouldn't
say I call myself a master at this, but I really didn't start to learn how to master breathing
until five years ago when I went to India to study for two weeks meditation and then becoming
a meditation instructor. And then from there, meeting with Wim Hof and doing the Wim Hof breathing techniques.
Then interviewing James Nestor, talking about breathing. Andrew Huberman, the famous neuroscientist
from Stanford, who talks about breathing in the brain and how it connects to the brain and the
body connection. And really, the deeper that I've gone down this rabbit hole of learning about the mastery of breathing
and applying it to myself, I've noticed incredible results. And it's like I'm noticing it quicker
and quicker. So it's been really helping me improve my peace, improve my mental health,
improve my mood just with breathing. And that is a powerful tool. You don't need anything. You don't need to
buy anything. You don't need to eat anything. You don't need to do anything different. In a few
moments, you can change the way you feel through your breath. And breathing is the number one way
to give your mind a reset and to get you back into a balanced peaceful state. When you're
nervous, stressed out, feeling overwhelmed, or catching yourself overthinking something or
overanalyzing, breathing exercises can help you get back to calm and control. And that's what this
is all about. The power of breath is that it lets you steer your energy. It lets you get back on to habit number one, your vision, as opposed to being distracted,
stressed, and overwhelmed.
And I did this as an athlete.
I would do this going up for big moments in a game in football.
Breathe slowly.
You know, I've had different sports psychologists come on and talk about how in practice you
want to actually get yourself up and practice like it's a game and when you're in a
game time situation you want to slow down because you have so much adrenaline
you want to calm and slow down so I do that as an athlete before I get on stage
right before I really tried to think about how do I slow it down because I
know when the lights turn on when the music gets on I'm gonna be hyped I'm
gonna be pumped but how do I slow down so I can communicate my message effectively as opposed to being
all anxious and excited about it?
So I want to share three steps to properly help yourself incorporate breathing into your
day today.
Number one is to bring awareness to your breath.
So really just think about it and bring awareness.
When we're breathing all the time,
all day long we're breathing,
but we're rarely paying attention to it.
We hardly really think about it.
But when we think about it by taking a moment
to bring your awareness to your breath,
just as it is,
you can get out of your head and into the present moment.
So when you're focused on breathing,
and that's all you focus on,
and see how it feels in your body, see how it feels in your mind and your heart, and see
how it's naturally calming your heart rate. You can actually feel your heart rate go down
and you put your attention on that activity for 60 seconds. You can eliminate other distractions
by putting attention on that
and get back into a rhythm
that will help you in that moment.
And this habit is great for when you catch yourself
overanalyzing things, stressed, anxious, worried,
uncertain about the future.
Just turn your focus back to your breath
and temporarily let go of any other stress. The second part is to
focus on and lengthen your exhale. This is something I learned in India when I
went there five years ago. They take inhales through the nose and whatever
the time amount through the nose they teach you to practice twice as long
exhale out of the nose. So if you're taking an inhale for
two counts in the nose, four counts out of the nose. And by repeating that process, it'll calm
your heart rate, it'll calm your mind, and get you back into a peaceful state. If you just repeat
that process over and over again, or it could be four inhale, eight out, three inhale, six out. The exhale is just as important, if not more important
than your inhale. So drawing out your exhale will slow your heart rate down and again bring you into
a calmer state of mind. And number three is to use a deliberate sigh. So Dr. Andrew Huberman, who's a neuroscientist
from Stanford, who's been on the show a couple of times, showed me an exercise that involves
breathing with a double intake and an extended exhale. So still the same extended exhale,
but a double intake. And by doing this exercise for just two or three cycles can really help you calm down
And it also expands the oxygen level in your body as well
And I urge you to try it a few times during the day when you feel overwhelmed
I've been doing this a lot since he taught me. It's simply you breathe through the nose with a double inhale like this
So a double inhale
and twice a long exhale that way by doing that a few times it really opens up the oxygen level
calms you at the same time so practice that a couple times throughout the day
habit number eight this is huge again this is no secret. This is no crazy hack.
It's just sleep more. Sleep more. Recover. Your body is going through so much every single day,
especially with the last 20 years with all the data and information we are consuming from our smartphones, from computers.
We're getting so many data points every day. The body needs more rest. We're working harder. We're trying to be more productive.
We're trying to squeeze the juice out of life more. Whether it's play, work, relationships,
we're squeezing more juice out of life. And we need proper sleep to recover. And if we're staying
up till 2 or 3 a.m. and feeling exhausted from the day and anxious about tomorrow, then we're
going to be in a sleep deficit and we need to get back on
track with our sleep. So here's a few ways to start getting better sleep. Number one, stick to
a sleep schedule as often as you can. Now this can be hard if you're traveling, I get it, but as often
as you can, try to go to bed at the same time. Proper sleep recovers and refreshes your mind.
So the next day can be stress-free. But it's
important to say, okay I'm gonna be in bed by 10 every night or 11 every night
or whatever that time is for you. So you have a schedule so you know you're gonna
get these certain amount of hours you need. Number two, pay attention to your
diet that day. Try not to have big heavy meals before sleeping and also try to
limit your caffeine intake after I would say 10 a.m. to noon.
You don't really want to have caffeine after that.
The research has shown it's going to make it harder for you to go to sleep at night.
So number three is creating a peaceful environment for your sleep is crucial.
My friend Sean Stevenson talks about this in his book, Sleep Smarter,
that you want to create a sleep sanctuary.
You want to make sure that your bedroom, where you sleep,
is a sanctuary for you to shut
off and go to sleep.
And that can be hard for some of us as we work from home, we sleep at home, we work,
we've got a lot of activities happening in the same place.
It's hard to really shut it off when you're used to picking up your phone in the morning
or being on your phone at night, watching TV in bed, or doing all these other things
in your sleeping space.
But you want to create a sleep sanctuary.
You want to create a routine that helps you separate yourself
from the other areas of your life, like taking a bath.
It'll help you rest and recover better.
So what is the routine?
What is the sanctuary that you're going to create the environment
of peaceful, restful sleep?
It's one of the most important things you can do.
And as an athlete, I used to sleep a ton.
I knew the importance of sleep because your body would be so sore.
We would take naps.
We would sleep as much as we could.
I used to sleep in as long as I could to get that quality sleep. As a business leader, when I'm traveling, I know now I'm not 21 anymore.
I know the importance of my sleep.
Even if I get two or three
hours less sleep than I'm used to, it will affect me. I'll need more caffeine.
You know, there'd be other things you'll need to supplement. So it's important to
know that if you are living a high-performance life, if you are trying
to squeeze the juice out of life, if that's the season of life you're in
right now, you've got to make sleep a huge priority for yourself.
So you have the energy, the focus, and the clarity to move towards your vision.
Habit number nine.
Oh, this is a big one.
It's a big one because a lot of people don't like to do this.
Is to take responsibility for yourself, for your actions,
and keep yourself accountable.
Now, it's easy to be the victim.
It's easy to say, make excuses for yourself and say,
well, I didn't want to do this.
I wasn't feeling this or this thing happened or this circumstance happened.
But you cannot negotiate your dreams and your goals.
You cannot negotiate with your goals through circumstances or excuses.
That will make you unhappy.
It's up to you to take responsibility for your life.
You have to decide today that you're going to get in shape, that you're going to start
that side hustle or that business, that you're going to take on a new hobby.
Whatever it may be for you, you've got to decide.
Only you can decide to take that first step.
And then, most importantly, be consistent on those steps day after day, week after week,
year after year.
But the next step that matters just as much is being held accountable for
the goals in front of you. That is important. The accountability is so key. And you need to
create a habit of checking in with someone on a daily or weekly basis that can hold you accountable
and call you out if you're falling short. This is why we have our Greatness Coaching Program
that high performance leaders in our community
are members of.
They have joined.
They have monthly accountability.
They've got partners.
They've got myself.
They've got a coach.
All these different things to help people stay accountable.
An accountability partner could be a friend for you.
Could be a family member.
Could be a co-worker.
Could be a coach that you hire.
Could just be someone you pay as an accountability person to check on you daily.
Whatever it is for you,
accountability is key. And the effects of accountability are strongest when you and your partner have similar goals.
So you can grow together with them. It's huge when you guys have that common goal. Just having one accountability partner
can do wonders for you. Just one person to hold you accountable, to give you checks and balances.
But you can also consider surrounding yourself with a team,
a community of people who inspire you and hold you accountable.
I hire lots of coaches.
Personally, I try to find the experts in every area of my life,
hire them to hold me accountable for what is important to me.
Only what is important to me. Only what is important
to me, I have them do. If it's not important and if it's not part of your vision, it's not part of
your overall life plan, then you don't have to do it. But for me, what's important, I hire people,
I have accountability in those areas of my life. Fitness, relationships, spirituality, business,
mental health, financial health. I mean, I hire people in every category.
And I understand you may not be at a point right now where you can do that, where you can afford
that. But find friends, find mentors, find people that can hold each other accountable. And if you
want to improve your fitness, one of the best things you can do is surround yourself with
fitness-minded people. So if you're hanging out with people that are lazy and on the couch and
aren't working out ever, then start spending more quality time with people that are getting up at
6 a.m. and doing joint runs together. There's run groups in every city around the world. There's
different things you can do to support you. So think about the accountability in your life,
what's important to improve right now, find those people to support you, and move forward.
What's important to improve right now?
Find those people to support you and move forward.
Habit number 10, learn to cope with tragedy and let go of regret, anger, and resentment.
Holding onto our past trauma
is one of the most painful things we can do for ourselves.
I am speaking for myself here
that I held on to trauma and resentment
and anger and frustration for 25 years,
if not more, in different parts of my life.
And that is a recipe for suffering, reaction, stress, painful moments, all these different
things. So, you know, the therapist who's been on who reminded me of this, Guy Winch,
talks about, you know, the ruminating of our past wounds and holding on to these past wounds
and how to heal the broken heart.
We've got that episode that you can dive in more.
And so many different therapists have come on and talked about this.
But I try to really look for the positives and what I can learn from these events and
feelings and channel those feelings into growth as a person.
And really, how can I serve others who might be going through
something similar in that situation. I remember hearing a story from Tony Robbins. He said,
when I was a kid, my mom used to beat me. She used to pour soap down my mouth because she thought I
was lying. She used to do all these things that caused a lot of pain and trauma for me. But I loved my mother because she gave me the capacity,
the expanded heart to want to help other people
rid themselves from their suffering.
So he used the painful moment not as resentment to hold on to,
you know, being angry at his mom,
but to say, you know, I love my mom for this.
You know, she didn't know any better in these times.
She was doing her best.
She was also loving in other ways. But those moments,
I'm not going to hold onto them and suffer. I'm going to use them to end suffering for those
around me. And I think that's really powerful. So really think about how you can let go of the
emotional traumas. This might take some work for a lot of people. For me, it took a long time to
really learn how to do that. It's one of the reasons why I started School of Greatness because I
wanted to interview these experts to teach me. But it's created so much
freedom and peace in my life and happiness in the process. And habit
number 11 is to eliminate things that don't make you happy and focus on what
does make you happy. So I asked Matthew McConaughey this and when I interviewed
him I said you know what are five things that we should be eliminating in our life?
And he mentioned this list of these five things.
Number one, we should be eliminating bad people.
Eliminate people that don't promote your growth and that don't bring you joy.
We often cling onto these toxic relationships or people because they validate us in the
short term, but they're very harmful in the long term.
So eliminate those people or at least distance yourself. Distance yourself and start spending
more quality time with people that bring you joy. Number two to eliminate is bad places. Stop going
to places that encourage unhealthy lifestyle behaviors like bars or fast food restaurants,
et cetera. Again, don't go to these places if you know you don't feel good when you're there
or afterwards. And if a certain place continually makes you feel bad, do whatever you can to
eliminate or distance yourself or go there less. Our environment can really impact our mood in a
big way. It's hard to not notice that. So create those environments for yourself that are healthier. Number three,
you got to eliminate the comparison to others. Stop comparing yourself to others and eliminate jealousy because what is it? The quote, comparison is the thief of joy. I think Einstein said that,
you know, when we're constantly comparing yourself to yourself of what you think you
should be or whatever. It's like always in comparison mode is not going to do anything good for your happiness.
Number four, overthinking your failures.
Instead of dissecting all your problems,
start dissecting all your success,
all the things you've done to overcome the challenges.
And ask yourself, how can I replicate my successes
rather than how can I stop my failures?
And number five to eliminate is instant gratification.
This is a big one. Fight the cravings for instant pleasure and results and be okay with delayed
gratification. Knowing that you're going to be doing the work consistently and your future self
is going to be grateful for your current self and the consistent effort you're putting in.
You're going to reap way bigger rewards in the future if you can delay that gratification.
So there you have it.
These are the 11 healthy, happy habits to increase the overall joy of your life
and set you up for a better life.
If you can commit to implementing these in small ways over the next couple of months,
I'd be curious about what would happen in your life.
What do you think you could create and transform in your life just by implementing a few of
these things consistently for a couple months?
Also, if you haven't picked up a copy of the book, The School of Greatness, this has more
in-depth on the principles of greatness, the distinctions to help you improve the quality
of your life, to reach greatness for your life.
And it's all about living bigger, loving deeper, and leaving a legacy. So if you want more,
you can check out the School of Greatness book. We'll have links below to help you further your
education. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. If you enjoyed it, make sure to
share this with some friends. You can post it on social media. You can use the link and just text
a few friends right now, lewishouse.com slash 1147.
Or you can just copy and paste this link and text it to a few friends right now.
And again, if this is your first time here, welcome to the School of Greatness.
And please subscribe over on Apple Podcasts and leave us a review of your biggest takeaway
or your favorite habit from this episode.
And I want to leave you with this quote from Abraham Lincoln, who said, discipline is choosing between what you want now and what you want most.
Ooh, that's so powerful because so many times we make choices on what we want now, what feels good,
what makes us feel happier in this moment, but maybe it isn't the healthiest happy habit long
term. So make sure you start thinking about what is going to make me happier the most long term,
not what's gonna make me happy for five minutes,
but then not make me feel healthy the next moment.
Again, we all have choices we get to make every single day.
It's your opportunity to start transforming
your thoughts and ideas into more deliberate,
intentional, aligned actions into your life.
Those actions will develop habits. Those habits will continue to either improve the quality of life or aligned actions into your life. Those actions will develop habits.
Those habits will continue to either improve the quality of life or hurt your quality of life. But
every action is up to you. And I want to remind you, if no one's told you lately that you are
loved, you are worthy, and you matter, my friend. I'm so grateful for you. And you know what time
it is. It's time to go out there and do something great.