The School of Greatness - 119 Top 10 Lessons and Breakthroughs of 2014

Episode Date: December 29, 2014

"I'm not here to live sometimes happy." - Lewis Howes If you enjoyed this episode, check out show notes and more at www.lewishowes.com/podcast/2014-top-lessons.

This is episode number 119, and you are entering the solo round. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. What is up, everyone?

Thank you so much for joining me today. Very excited about episode number 119 because it's my top 10 lessons of 2014. That's right, the top 10 lessons that I've learned in 2014 and that I've seen throughout my experiences with everyone else through the podcast community, through my friends, family, and things of that nature. Very excited. I want to dive into this.

I'm going to keep this one pretty short because I've got 10 lessons and I just want to give it to you real talk right here. Greatness style. So number one is being clear on what your vision is. You know, I see a lot of people that email me or that come up to me and ask me questions about how to get to where they want to be. But really, they're just not clear on what they want in the first place. And the clearer you become, like make it so freaking disgustingly clear, like put such detail on what your vision is, what it looks like, what it feels like, what the experience is here to have when you create it, what it is you want to be so clear about it, you got to write it out. If you've got to put it up on a on a billboard in your room, right and post it up on the wall, whatever may be,

you got to be so clear on it, and you got to focus on it. Okay, so that's number one, big lesson, a lot of people aren't clear on what they want. And they just stay in the same relationship. And they just are miserable, or they're sometimes happy. And I'm not here to live sometimes happy, right? You know, there's obviously going to be ups and downs. but we want to be, you know, 90% of the time fulfilled and happy or on the path of that, not stuck in misery or frustration. So get clear on what you want, then find the people to support you to get it and take action. That's number one.

Number two, know that some opportunities are really distractions in disguise. some opportunities are really distractions in disguise. So this is what I have seen a lot this last year with entrepreneurs and with some listeners of the podcast is they have too many opportunities. It's like, oh, there, I see this way to make money on this thing. And I could do this and this and this. It's like all these different things when some of the smartest people I know and some of the most successful people I know do one thing and they do it over and over and over again and they are more successful than anyone else. I think of my friend Marie Forleo.

She does one video a week and has one product a year and is one of the biggest online marketing people right now with her online program called B-School. She's super successful and everyone wants to promote her and everyone loves her content because she's consistent and she does it over and over. She pretty much says no to everything else in the world. Unless it's an interview with Oprah, she says no. And who knows, even then maybe she'll say no to Oprah someday soon. But she is so focused on doing what she does and sticking to it and making it better and progressing and evolving with it, as opposed to chasing all the other opportunities that could look like great opportunities, but they're really distractions in disguise. So know that your opportunities, unless they serve your vision, and they're really going to fulfill that,

they could be distractions in disguise. Number three is to fall in love with people. Seems like a pretty no brainer concept, right? But man, this last year, I fell in love with people on a completely different level. And that may sound a little cheesy or weird, but really allow yourself to feel love. And again, I'm actually thinking about it. And my old self would be like, dude, what the heck are you talking about, Lewis? That's a little cheesy. But the more I actually connect with human beings, eye to eye, and just relax in my body, and connect with them, listen to what they're up to, what they're excited about, what's not working for them, what they're frustrated about, what they're feeling. And the more I am in that experience and allow my guards to drop, just incredible things

are created in those moments. And the moments really feel, I don't know, it's like it stretches out time for me. And it's really fun to explore other people and just falling in love with complete strangers and being intimately in love with someone, falling in love with complete strangers and being intimately in love with someone, falling in love with someone deeply, reconnecting with family members and falling in love, re-falling in love with them, you know, falling in love with people who maybe you don't love, that maybe they're your enemy, quote unquote, or someone who, you know, that you haven't really gotten along with in a long time, really take a moment to let go, forgive, fall in love, and allow yourself to drop your guards from time to time

when you're with people. And just be in that moment, experience that moment of love. It could be with a stranger that you never see again, but allow yourself to go there in that conversation just for a moment. You don't have to say anything specifically. You don't have to get super vulnerable or cry or anything like that, but just allow your heart to open up and experience what that love feels like. And the more you do that, I'm going to tell you, it's going to be an awesome next year and you're going to really appreciate that experience. That's number three. Number four, complete opposite, I would say, is to get excited about pain.

And what I mean by this is go beyond your threshold of pain. So as an athlete, I experienced lots of pain constantly throughout my sports career in high school and college and playing professional football. And now even in playing with the USA National Handball Team, I've experienced lots of injury and lots of physical pain. And what I would say by this is you don't necessarily have to go break your ribs or break a wrist or have surgery or something like I've done. Instead, fall in love with putting yourself through some type of exercises, overcoming fear, learning new things, doing something you're not good at. That can be really kind of a frustrating, painful experience for you. You know, it doesn't have to look like you're going through this agony, but something that is a challenge. And something that you can easily do is, you know, a workout every single day for 10 minutes that puts your body through pain that's emotionally painful, that's physically painful.

I think, you know, a good three mile run for me, I just finished right before I did this interview with myself, I guess, was pretty painful for me. You know, I was on the treadmill for 25 minutes and, and did a three mile run. And for me, I experienced pain, my lungs start to hurt, you know, my breathing starts to hurt. And it's not like I'm killing myself. But I'm, I'm pushing the threshold that I can take. And I think when we build up that threshold, we're able to take on more in our lives. We're able to serve more people. We're able to take on more emotions, all the different things that come our way. We're able to let it bounce off us pretty easily as opposed to hold onto it and let it

control us and take us over. So get excited about pain, do something every single day that is painful. That is a challenge that allows you to increase your pain threshold. That's number four. Number five, something I picked up in the last year. I used to do this back in college every single morning and every single night, which is meditate. So know that meditation is massive. And you're going to get massive results when you take a moment to meditate. And it doesn't need to look or be a certain way. It can be any way you want it to be. But really, I like to do about a 10 to 12 minute guided meditation, where I listen to an audio

with someone leading me through like a meditation that's got some soothing music. And it really just allows me to focus on my breathing and relax and be aware of what's coming up for me in my life in that moment, reflect on what I'm most grateful for. It's kind of a process of all those things. But I've been doing that pretty regularly in the mornings and at night. Again, for just 10 minutes at a time over 2014. And I've seen it just help my emotions so much and help me kind of like be calm under stress and really allow myself to navigate through sticky situations a lot better. And it's like creating this clarity on my vision of what I want to create for the day. So it gets me kind of like started for clarity. Okay,

what am I creating today? And then at the end of the day, what am I most grateful for? So kind of starting the day and closing the day off. I think it's powerful to do with meditation. So that's number five. Number six, greatness is upon us. I love this. Number six, it's hard to inspire and enroll others in what you're creating in your life when you aren't healthy. That's lesson number six. It's hard to inspire and enroll others in what you're creating in your life when you're not healthy. Think about it. When you see someone who is emotionally, physically, mentally, let's say unhealthy, are you inspired by them? Do you feel like pumped up in what they're doing?

Do you want to like jump on their bandwagon and say, yeah, I'm all on board? Or are you more inspired with people who emotionally, mentally, and physically are healthy? You know, in pretty relative terms, that they're healthy or they're focusing on health. Maybe they don't have, again, it doesn't have to look perfect, but being healthy, kind of embodying a healthy lifestyle. This is big. I think some people are focusing too much on the money, the bling bling, and they're spending their energy on that as opposed to really creating a environment of healthy living

for themselves. And by creating that healthy environment and those habits of daily health, you know, you're able to inspire more people around you to do that as well because they're going to want to jump on and be healthy also. So again, it's hard to inspire and enroll others in what you're creating if you aren't healthy. So start living and make healthy a lifestyle choice. Don't make it a sometimes diet thing, but make it an actual lifestyle choice. Like, you know, sometimes choose not to smoke cigarettes, but like, okay, let's always never smoke cigarettes. Or let's, if you're going to drink, drink once in a while, not every day.

Or if you're going to have sugar, and I'm pointing at myself when I have this conversation, if you're going to have sugar, you know, don't have it after every meal, you know, have it like once or twice a week type of thing. Or, you know, figure out a way to live a healthy lifestyle, whatever that is to you. And we're all in different places and all have different standards. But whatever it is to you, be healthy emotionally, mentally and physically, and you'll inspire and enroll more people around you to support you in your vision. Number seven, find ways to make others succeed and be an interruption for people.

So what I mean by this is, you know, when I was a kid, I never felt like I was, you know, intelligent. I didn't think I had the book smarts. I was always one of the bottom four in academics in my class with grades. So on every grade card, they would rank us, believe it or not, at my schools. And I was always in the bottom four. So I always felt super dumb, super ignorant. I got made fun of all the time by kids, I was in the special needs classes. So it was me and the other kids who, you know, a lot of a lot of actually the handicapped kids, I was in those class with those kids who were like

trying to learn and figure things out. And so I always felt very insecure about my, let's say my intelligence when it came to books and learning from school subjects. What I did to kind of help myself get to the next level and achieve the things I wanted is I started just connecting with other people and finding ways to help them achieve their goals. And I found that by doing that, I'm becoming successful by doing so because they're gonna help me in return sometimes. So when I started helping other people achieve their goals, whether it be making introductions,

introducing people to information, supporting them, coaching them, mentoring, whatever it may be, whenever I do that, I usually tend to achieve the goals that I want at the same time. So do that, find ways to make other people succeed that I want at the same time. So do that find ways to make other people succeed, and also be an interruption for people. And what I mean by that is, I have called out more bullshit in people's lives this year than I ever have my whole life,

you know, and I'll tell you what, it's scary. Because some of my best friends, I'm like, I go up to my look in the eye, and I say, you're full of shit, man. What have you been doing with your life? You're just having the same conversation, the same excuses, the same stories of why you're not getting what you want. And you're just being lazy about it because you're afraid. So I've called more people out by being this interruption. And some people, it's kind of like shooking them up. And some people it's, uh, you know, they don't really like it right away. But I think 99% of people have appreciated it and have actually taken action and like done

some type of shift in their life. Maybe some people are doing better than others, but they recognize that they appreciate it. They say, thank you. You know, I'm taking a look at this and I'm going to do something about it. So when you're an interruption for people, give people feedback in a loving way. You don't have to just say, dude, you're sucking right now. Step up. We're not going to be friends. In a way, you can approach it and say, listen, you know, I just want to let you know we've been friends for a while.

I, you know, I care about you. I love you. And I want you to know that, you know, I got your back with anything you need. So you can start the conversation in a way that's like, hey, listen, I'm on your side. I don't want you to think I'm like against you or just attacking you. I'm on your side. Because if you come in an attacking manner, you're probably going to turn your friends off and they're going to be like, dude, Lewis is a jerk. So to approach it in a loving way first and then say, listen, I'm going to give you some honest feedback, though. You're not stepping up. You say you want these things, but you're not doing it.

And that is not okay with me. As your friend, that's not okay with me. So I want you guys to take your friends on this year. Take people on. But really, you can't take someone on unless you do what first? Unless you take on yourself first. That's right. So you've got to have everything at least in progress in your journey before you can be like calling all your friends out. I'm like,

Hey, get in shape. And why aren't you doing this in your business? And why is your relationship still suck? You can't do that and say that if you're not in the process as well. Okay. So you need to check yourself before you wreck yourself in that situation. That is point number seven, find ways to make others succeed and be an interruption for people when needed, but come from love. Number eight, if we aren't creating a win-win, then what's the point of everything? Man, this is such a huge lesson for me this last year. My whole life, I was coming from a place of win-lose. I was coming from a place of if I want to achieve my goal and win, that means someone else has to lose or everyone else is in second place and lower. And when I learned this about a year and a half ago, can you believe it, that I'm 31 now and I'm just learning this like a year and a half ago, it finally hit me like, wow, none of this matters unless the people I'm working with or the people I'm supporting or the people that, um, you know, are working on projects with me or

the people that listen to this podcast, nothing matters unless everyone wins. And, um, man, everything has shifted since I've embodied that. And again, am I perfect? Heck no. Like I'm sure still there's some times where I'm like, trying to figure out a way for me to have the biggest advantage or something. But in almost every situation, I approach it with, okay, what's the win win here? And the win win doesn't need to be like equal amounts or whatever, like that may be. It's like, what's the win win for both of us? What is it that this person wants and that I want? And where can we all win in this situation? So creating the win-win.

And someone may say, well, if you're playing sports, Lewis, how do you create a win-win? How does both team wins? Do we all tie? And that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about, you know, I'm still competitive in sports and, you know, I want to win every single game. So if you're going to play any sport against me, I'm going to try to beat you just to let you know.

However, the win-win is coming from a place of humility when you win and coming from a place of gratitude when you win and sportsmanship and not being dirty, not trash-talking, not making the other person feel bad, but playing to your best ability and then inspiring the other team to play their best at the same time. So again, creating the win-win when you win, when you lose everything, everything about life, relationships, business, find the win-win in every situation. Number nine, we got two left. Number nine,

invest in your brand. You know, I'm putting a lot more energy and time investing into my brand and doing kind of like a lot of the backend stuff to increase my brand and increase my brand awareness with the School of Greatness, with me personally, you know, Lewis Howe is that brand, I guess, but really finding ways to increase my branding, also my relationship brand, my content branding, all these different things. also my relationship brand, my content branding, all these different things. I think, you know, the brand that you build is really what's going to be the legacy that you have later when you start building it now. So I think it's valuable to really just start investing in that now as opposed to waiting until you're ready to have like a bigger brand. Start investing in your design and

your branding now so that you can really start putting that in the minds of everyone else who sees it. And so long term, you're going to have that to follow up with. OK, so start investing in your brand, spending some extra money on a designer or whatever may be to increase that value. I think it's really important and it's going to serve you for many years coming if you do it now. And number 10, there's listen, there's lots of lessons that I've learned over 2014, but these are kind of like the top 10 that came to mind when putting together this episode.

So number 10, and it's something I've been noticing a lot lately, is to replace negative talk with gratitude. So I did a episode recently, I believe it was, it was episode number 111. So episode number 111, the 10 essential truths to upgrade your life and crush 2015. And one of them, man, I got hundreds of emails from people. When I asked people in that episode, if you listened to it,

go back and listen to it after this one, if you haven't yet, it's lewishouse.com slash 111. But I got hundreds and hundreds of messages from people who said all they do is beat themselves up and give this negative self-talk constantly. And when something's not going their way,

they just like emotionally beat themselves up. Their inner bully beats up their innocent child inside of them and constantly just degrades them over and over. So that doesn't serve you or anyone around you. That's not inspiring. And again, I was the king of negative self-talk when I was a kid. I felt I was the dumbest kid in the world and didn't want to go to school because I couldn't read in class when the teacher would ask the kids like, okay, we're going to read aloud. And they would pick out kids to read a paragraph at a time. I was sweating and terrified because the simplest words I would

stumble over and I couldn't read them and I didn't know how to pronounce them and I didn't know what they meant. So I would just try to mumble over all my words because I was just so terrified to have the kids laughing at me, which they did many, many times. So instead of being negative with yourself when you do something that's not what you want to do or that's not the results you want or it's not getting you want to do, or that's not the results you want, or it's not getting you the outcome that you want. Instead of just beating yourself up and giving yourself an emotional pounding, replace that with, you know what, what's the lesson here?

And what am I grateful for? You know, I'm still grateful that I have my health or I'm grateful that I can see today. Like, thank goodness I can see. What would life be like if I could not see if both my eyes were unable to see and I just had to feel and hear my way to walk around, man, what would life be like? Or what would life be like if this, you know, be grateful for the things that you do have replace the negative talk with positive gratitude. Okay. These are my 10 lessons, I guess, and tips from 2014. The 10 lessons I learned that are very powerful that I want you guys to take with you into 2015. That's right.

It's going to be the best year ever. And I'm super pumped to be your facilitator on the School of Greatness podcast and to bring you epic information and incredible guests. We've got some huge, awesome, inspiring individuals coming up here in this month alone. And it's just going to continue to roll and roll with the positive flow. I'm very, very excited and I'm so blessed and grateful for each and every one of you that listens to my show. That listens whether you've heard one episode, or all 119 episodes, I appreciate you for your time and your energy and your attention. There's so many things you could be doing. And you're spending some quality time with me

each week when you do. Very, very excited. Thank you guys so much for an incredible 2014. Wow. I'm just amazed and in awe of what you guys created with this podcast and supporting it, the growth of this podcast.

And it's because of you, I'm able to bring on bigger guests and more influencers. It's because of you, I'm able to bring on bigger guests and more influencers. It's because of you and the size of the show that the influencers are reaching out constantly and asking them to get on the show because they've heard

that it's one of the top podcasts on iTunes. It's all because of you guys. So thank you from the bottom of my heart. I hope you've enjoyed this episode, the 10 lessons of 2014. I will have all of the information and these points listed over at the show notes at lewishouse.com slash 119. You guys know what time it is. It's time to go out there and do something great. សូវាប់បានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបានបា Thank you.