The School of Greatness - 3 Ways to Beat Procrastination & Master Self-Discipline EP 1294

Episode Date: July 18, 2022

We often think there will always be next year, or another “at bat”, or another opportunity in everything we do. But what if that isn’t true? What if the opportunities and the circumstances we have at this very moment are all we’ll ever have? It’s human nature to procrastinate and put things off in place of pleasure and fun. It’s natural for us to avoid the things that scare us, and it’s natural to have a fear of failure. This episode boiled down the blueprint to overcoming our natural urge to procrastinate into a 3-step process. These steps come from the strategies and tips over the course of the countless conversations with some of the world’s leading experts on this topic.In this episode, you will learn:The necessary steps to stop procrastinating.Why it's so important to have a vision for your life.How forming unconditional self-love requires embracing your flaws.The keys to master self-discipline.For more, go to lewishowes.com/1294Rory Vaden on Beating Procrastination and Rewiring Your Brain for Success: https://link.chtbl.com/1184-podDavid Goggins on Mastering Your Mind and Defying the Odds: https://link.chtbl.com/715-podKaty Milkman on Believing in Yourself & Setting Goals: https://link.chtbl.com/1151-pod

What if the opportunities and the circumstances we have at this very moment are all we'll ever have? I've boiled down the blueprint to overcoming our natural urge to procrastination into a three-step process. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro-athlet athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Welcome back everyone. Today we are going to discuss something that holds so many of us back from overcoming obstacles and achieving our dreams. And that thing is procrastination.

Now, over the years, I've found that a lack of self-love is the biggest killer of dreams. But procrastination is a close second. And we often think there are always going to be more time. There's going to be next year. There's going to be another at-bat, or another opportunity in everything we do. But what if that isn't true? What if the opportunities and the circumstances we have at this very moment are all we'll ever have?

Now to start, I want to take a moment to make sure we all acknowledge this. It's human nature to procrastinate and to put things off in a place of pleasure and of fun fun I am the king of procrastination if I want to be I can say no to things all the time I can just say I want to go play all day and delay delay delay getting something done and nowadays we have so many streaming services and social media apps and other distractions available to us all the time, 24-7. So I don't think it would be valuable for me to tell you that in order to overcome procrastination,

all you need to do is take action. That's something you already know. I want you to go deeper than that and to give you the tools to make taking action so much easier for you. So that's the approach I want to take for this episode. And to do that, I've boiled down the blueprint to overcoming our natural urge to procrastination into a three-step process. It's three steps.

And these steps come from all the strategies and tips that I've learned over the course of countless conversations I've had with some of the world's leading experts on this topic. And in addition to the insights that I've discovered for myself and what's worked for me in the different seasons of my life and what has not worked for me. Now by following this three-step process, I am confident that you'll be able to develop lasting habits that will help you defeat distractions,

overcome procrastination, and help you get closer to accomplishing all of your goals and dreams. So what I want you to do is get out a pen and paper, make sure you take down some notes, and let's dive in. Step one is to create a vision for your life. Vision is something I talk about all the time because without it, we are lost. This is an absolutely critical step for you to overcome the procrastination that's holding you back. Without an authentic, actionable vision for your life, you'll always be jumping from one goal to the next goal, but still feel aimless.

Living life without a well-constructed vision is like driving around with no map or destination in mind. And eventually, even the best cars run out of gas. So it's our job to create a compelling vision that excites us, that inspires us, and propels us to become the best version of ourselves month after month, year after year. Now as human beings we need purpose. It's in our DNA. We need it. Without it we will feel lost no matter what we accomplish in life. My friend and best-selling author Donald Miller calls this dilemma a narrative void. And when we

don't have a compelling story we can become a part of, we feel empty and lost. We feel unfulfilled. And when we don't have an opportunity to rise above our circumstances and become the hero of our own story, we feel hopeless. We don't really feel like getting out of bed and really feel like doing anything except for procrastination in our daily lives. And this is exactly what happened to me before I got clear on the vision I wanted for my life. And it didn't matter what goals I was achieving, whether it was becoming a two-sport All-American athlete or making my first million dollars in business, every time I reached one of these milestones,

I was expecting to feel something, something like I was complete, fulfillment. I was expecting to wake up and have everything in my life changed forever. But instead, I felt empty again only a couple days after achieving all these big goals. And I was curious about this. I was like, why is this still happening for me? That all changed after I launched the School of Greatness. Today, my mission I have for my life and with my work at Greatest Media is to impact and serve 100 million lives every single week.

And in fact, my team and I go over this goal weekly in our meetings to make sure we're all steering in the same direction. I'm sure my team is sick of me talking about it consistently, but it's important to remind myself and others what we're doing and where we're heading. And if you hear that number of 100 million and think it sounds scary,

then know that it does for me as well. Your biggest dreams should fill you both with fear and excitement. It isn't enough to say, you know, my vision is to write a book or my vision is to just help some people. You need to be specific so you know exactly what you're striving for

and why you're doing it. This just helps you be guided on your journey. For these two examples, you could add clarity to your vision by making it something like my vision is to write one book every two years that inspires people to be more kind to each other or my vision is to help a hundred people per year get access to healthy food through my local charity. Something more specific. Now this doesn't mean our mission can't change or evolve and grow over time. There are seasons of life. We all

evolve and experience new phases of our life. But what it means is getting crystal clear on what we're working towards. And it helps us create a sense of urgency that will inspire us to take action now and not procrastinate. For every day that I slow down or decide to put things off, that could mean one, two, or thousands of new lives that I'm not being of impact to, that I'm not being of service to. For every day you put off writing your book, that's another day you aren't getting closer to your goal of writing one book every two years. I want to address something that I think so many people overlook when it comes to stopping procrastination. The work that I'm doing right now, it fills me up. It fuels me. It excites me. And I truly think this was the work I

was created to do in my life. But it also took me many seasons of figuring out how to get here. But I'll be honest, if I had a job that I didn't like or I had little to no passion for, I doubt I would be as motivated as I am right now. And I'd probably procrastinate a whole lot more if I was in a career that just drained me, that sucked the life out of me, rather than fueling me, being around people that I was inspired by, being around a mission that I was inspired by. Now this shouldn't be used as an excuse for you to not go after your dreams, but I think it's important to discuss this. And it's the same reason why I often say if you don't feel excited to get out of bed in the morning, then maybe you haven't found the right mission for your life yet. And that's okay. And this doesn't

mean we all don't have bad days here and there. But if you're always procrastinating and you're always disengaged, then maybe you haven't found a vision that truly lights you up yet. And so you just got to keep looking. So if you haven't taken the time to really drill down your vision, then be sure to do it today. Do it during this episode, do it right afterwards, and start coming up with more ideas. Because it's the very first step to overcoming procrastination in the short term and in the long term. Now step two, this is something that a lot of people are afraid to do and that is to embrace your flaws and develop unconditional self-love. This is challenging. Leadership and productivity expert Rory Vaden has studied and spoken about the psychology

behind procrastination for years now. During one of our interviews together, he told me that the single biggest reason we procrastinate is that we don't feel like we're good enough, smart enough, or capable enough of doing the thing we want to accomplish. So to cope with that reality, we self-sabotage by not even starting. Now, this is a big deal because most of my life, I didn't feel like I was good enough, smart enough, talented enough, old enough, experienced enough, credible enough to go out and do the things that I've done. And so it is scary. It's hard to overcome that insecurity,

that fear, that self-doubt. And so therefore is scary. It's hard to overcome that insecurity, that fear, that self doubt. And so therefore, a lot of times people will procrastinate because of that. But that's the thing, the space in between the doubt and where you want to be is the experience you need to gain. It's the skills you need to acquire. It's the fears you need to overcome in order to get there. So that is the thing that we've got to learn to do. Now, I also thought this point that Rory shared was so powerful, and we've seen a ton of positive feedback from listeners about how eye-opening it was for them as well. And maybe you've had a dream of writing a screenplay for years, but you didn't feel like

you're talented enough for anyone to buy it. So you self-sabotage by not even starting. Maybe you've wanted to launch a business since you were a kid, but you don't think anyone would ever buy your product or service. So again, you self-sabotage by convincing yourself it's not worth your time. Now to get you moving in the right direction, I want to share two powerful exercises that will help you develop unconditional self-love to get you through these types of negative thoughts that hold so many people back. And the first one comes from former Navy SEAL and best-selling author David Goggins. And he calls it the cookie jar concept. To start,

I want you to think of three accomplishments that you are most proud of in your life. And maybe it's moving to another state or country. Or maybe it's finding a way to thrive in a new place. Or maybe it's something that seems as simple as starting a book you've always wanted to read but you kept putting it off and now you finished it. These moments are what will go into your cookie jar. So be sure to remember them or write them down if you need to. Write down what these accomplishments are. Then whenever you're having a bad day or you think you don't have what it takes to finish a difficult task, I want you to look inside your cookie jar and anytime doubt creeps

into your head, reach for your cookie jar and repeat those accomplishments out loud to yourself. This will help remind you that you are capable of reaching the goals in front of you. So if you consistently get up in the morning and run, then three months down the line, you'll know in your heart of hearts that you are a runner. The second exercise comes from a framework that I put together with my team,

and it's called the Abundance Formula. And to To begin I want you to take a moment to write down the answers to the question I'm gonna ask you right now. So on a scale of 1 to 10, how much gratitude do you put out into the world and give to yourself? Essentially what rating would you give yourself when it comes to showing a general sense of gratitude on a consistent basis in the world? You're grateful for life, you're grateful for the people that you interact with, you're grateful for the basic things, for the big things. You're a grateful person on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest that you just live

and breathe gratitude all day long, 1 being the lowest. Second part, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you appreciate the person you are and the people in your life? What grade would you give yourself on the self appreciation scale? So 10 being, I really appreciate myself and I appreciate people around me by communicating that appreciation. 10 being very high, One being you never appreciate anyone else or yourself. And last, on a scale from one to ten, how regularly do you acknowledge the person you've become and do you acknowledge other people? How often do you take time to acknowledge the obstacles you've overcome in your life, however big or small they might be to you? Again, ten

being you acknowledge yourself and others consistently, one being you never acknowledge yourself for what you've overcome or who you've been. Now, I recently asked these very same questions to a group of VIP attendees during a virtual event we hosted called the Greatness Challenge. And I'll be honest, the responses were pretty interesting for me. On average, most of the people in attendance gave themselves a rating as low as one or two in all three categories. In fact, there were very few scores higher than seven in all three. And after asking them those three questions, I followed up by asking them this final one. Now, it might sound harsh, but I want you to answer it honestly for me as well. How do you

expect to be someone who is consistently having energy, focus, and the passion to show up for their dreams if you can't even show up for yourself? If you can't take the time on a regular basis to acknowledge yourself for being the person you are, then how do you expect to have the self-love necessary to overcome procrastination and challenges? If you can't take the time to appreciate and be grateful for who you are, how do you expect to know that you're worthy of a better life?

This is such an important and impactful exercise because the truth is that chasing after your dreams on a regular basis is already an uphill battle and not having a firm foundation of self-worth will make it an even tougher climb. I also know another truth though. We're all worthy of loving ourselves unconditionally. No matter where you're at in your journey, no matter what mistakes you've made, no matter where you've been or what others have said to you. We all have what it takes to overcome the doubts that are holding us back and keeping

us from going after our hopes and dreams. And it all starts within us by developing a strong sense of self-love. And to really drive this point home, I want to end this section with a story about a VIP member from that same virtual event that I just mentioned. And her name is Shannon Little. When I brought her up onto the stage for a coaching session, she told me that since she was a little girl, she always wanted to be a writer.

And yet for 17 years, she had been holding off on publishing a book. 17 years is a long time. After hearing this, I challenged her. I asked her to release a book. 17 years is a long time. After hearing this, I challenged her. I asked her to release a book on Amazon by midnight that very same day. Now the book just needed to have one quote inside of it and there wasn't any room for excuses or extensions or backpedaling. I gave her this challenge and I explained to her and the other attendees that taking little actions gives us the confidence to take bigger ones and that releasing this shorter

book was the perfect place for Shannon to start. And if she went through with it, I'd also give her a hundred dollar Amazon gift card. And I was brutally honest with her. I said, look, you are not going to do this. I don't think you are going to do it. I told her that her history of not taking action made me pretty confident that I would win the bet. I was just trying to kind of dig into her a little bit.

And then later that night, a member of my team emailed me a screenshot and showed her book was available for purchase on Amazon. Boom, she did it. She published her very first book and I was super proud of her for taking initiative on achieving her dreams Even if it seemed like a small step it was massive for her because she hadn't This daunting concept of writing a book and needing it to be perfect and waiting for the right time to put it out there and you don't have to do it that way and I wanted to share this story with you because I Know so many of you are experiencing exactly what Shannon was going through. Being frozen from taking action, making excuses, and letting life's ups and downs get in the way of who you were meant to be and what you were meant to create.

And sometimes it takes the same critical accountability I gave to Shannon for all of us to finally take action and make a change. So if you're nodding while you're listening or watching this, then just know this is all for you. And by taking small steps like this time and time again, you'll eventually develop a sense of self-love that will protect you from procrastination and the doubts that are holding you back. It's so powerful. Step three is to find ways to overcome your flaws

and develop discipline over time. Now, this is the third and final step of our framework for putting an end to procrastination for good. And it's such an important one. You can read as many books or listen to as many podcasts on productivity that are out there. But if you don't take the time to discover what works best for you, then you're always going to be guessing and running

the risk of eventually burning out. So take a moment to take inventory right now. Are you someone who's extremely self-motivated and prefers working alone more than you like working with others? Or are you someone who needs the accountability of like-minded peers to get the very best out of you. Or you're somewhere in the middle. Self-awareness is the key here. You just got to know what works for you. For me personally, surrounding myself with people who will hold me accountable on following through with my goals has always worked best. It's that peer pressure effect that works for me. And that's why I invest in therapists, I invest in business coaches, I invest in skills I wanna learn.

So I have Spanish tutors and trainers and other experts in the areas of my life that I want to get better at, build confidence in and master these skills. And I found it easier to develop discipline when others are there to help me stay on track with my commitments and also just see what are my blind spots, what's holding me back and point them out for me. And I actually just finished my first marathon and

without the help of my business partner who trained and ran with me, I don't think I would have been able to reach the goal or get close to finishing it. To give you a head start on developing discipline, I'm going to run you through three of the most powerful exercises I know of how to destroy procrastination. And the exercise number one is the five second rule. Now I love this. For those that don't know about Mel Robbins, she's one of the world's most sought after public speakers, serial entrepreneur, and New York Times bestselling author.

She's also been on the School of Greatness a number of times and I'm lucky to call her a great friend of mine. One of her ideas that took the world by storm a few years ago is called the five-second rule. And I think it can be an essential tool to help you overcome procrastination and self-doubt in your life. And during one of our conversations, Mel explained something that really stuck with me. She said, we as humans make decisions based on feelings

and that's exactly what's robbing us of joy and opportunity. The only way we can truly change our lives is with one five second decision at a time. I think it's important for us to understand that we might never feel motivated to develop the habits that will benefit us the most. We might never feel like getting up at 5 a.m. or 6 a.m. We might never feel like sending an important sales email. We might never feel like running

that marathon and doing the training leading up to the marathon. And if we let our emotions and feelings take control of our lives, we might never reach our ultimate potential and we may never truly feel fulfilled. Now, the exercise she created to overcome this is as simple as it sounds, but it's so powerful. It's called the five-second rule. So whenever you have to make an important decision, whether that's making a cold call,

getting up early to go to the gym, Mel says we should all count down from five to one and then take action. So five, four, three, two, one, and go. And the science says this practice works because there's a five second window between an instinct or motivation and the hesitation is not to act. The reason is because our brains are designed to help protect us from harm. So they'll magnify any feeling of doubt

and trick us into not taking any action at all. This is why it's so critical to leverage the power and momentum of the moment during that initial five second window. So try it for yourself. Anytime you're feeling not motivated, but you know you need to do something, go five, four, three, two, one, and go and just move. Take that step forward. Start

writing, doing whatever you need to do to take that action. Exercise number two, forming identity based habits. This is massive. I don't think I can emphasize this enough, how powerful this becomes. This comes from a conversation I had with James Clear. He's a bestselling author, massive New York Times bestseller, productivity expert. When he was on the show, James told me that the root of forming great habits over the long term is paying attention to those that reinforce your identity. So what does this mean? to those that reinforce your identity. So what does this mean? For instance, if you'd like a part of your identity

to be that you never miss workouts, then going to the gym today will reinforce that identity. So if instead of going to the gym, you eat a donut or a piece of chocolate cake, you'll be going against that identity you made for yourself. If you're someone who identifies as a painter, then developing a habit of painting

for 30 minutes per day will reinforce that part of you. It is embedded in your identity. James puts it like this, each behavior casts a vote for the type of person you want to become. If you cast enough votes in any one area, that's who you become. And if you haven't figured out what type of identity you want to create for yourself, then I encourage you to take the time to do it. Take out a piece of paper and list the things you consider as most important and valuable in your life. Maybe you're a documentary filmmaker, a parent,

a business consultant, or something else entirely. By taking steps to become someone who embodies the values that you hold in high regard, you'll gain confidence and evidence that you truly are that type of person, which will make it that much easier to form the habits to help you overcome procrastination. And a quick story on this, for almost 40 years, right? I'll be 40 next year. I have made it my identity that I don't drink alcohol. And I did this from high school and college as an athlete where I was just like, this is my mindset.

When other people are out drinking and out late at night, I'm gonna train to become a better athlete. I had a vision for what I wanted, so I eliminated the things that got in the way of it. Then after college, I was like, okay, everyone's just going out and drinking on the weekends, you know, in their careers. But for me, I was like, hmm, I know this didn't support me with my vision of being a better athlete and also saving money and the health benefits of not drinking, all these different

things. So for me personally, I stayed on that streak. And to this day, I've never been drunk. I might have a sip of something, you know, once or twice a year, a special celebration, but I make it a part of my identity that I just don't drink alcohol. Now, there's nothing right or wrong, good or bad here, but that supports my vision and my values. And so it's very easy for me to not be tempted

because it's a part of my identity. And every day that I don't do that, I'm casting a vote for myself as part of my identity. So think of a situation in your life where you identify as that maybe other people don't. And use that, keep casting those votes to build your identity and then stack your identity with the other values that you want for your life.

Now, exercise number three, remind yourself that you are going to die. Now, I know this might sound a little dark, but hear me out for a minute. There's a country in South Asia called Bhutan and it consistently ranks as one of the happiest countries in the world. And when this information first came out, people were of course curious as

to why the Bhutanese were so much happier than other countries. Were their habits or mindset or cultural practices that caused them to have more joy than the rest of us? The answer is pretty incredible and it stuck with me over the years. One of the main reasons Bhutan is happy is because every single day, they make it a cultural priority to remind themselves that they are going to die. By doing that, they naturally don't seem to sweat the small stuff

and instead focus on the things that matter the most, their loved ones, their health, their community, and all the things that matter the most. Their loved ones, their health, their community, and all the things that are valuable to them. And if you don't want to do this exercise on your own, there's also apps like WeCroak that will remind you on your phone multiple times a day that you're going to die. Literally, it's an app that just pops up and says you're going to die to remind you of this practice. And I think this practice is such a game changer because it really forces you to look at things from a higher level, take a bigger perspective on life. It takes you out of the day-to-day task that's the source of the stress for so many of us that bogs us down, the social media,

the responding to emails, the chores, the errands, the distractions, the making sure the house is clean or getting our workout in, the name it. All the distractions that make us focused on the small things that stress us out as opposed to the gratitude of our life. It brings us back to the only thing that's certain for all of us, that we're all going to leave this earth one day. And it's an important reminder. So why not make happiness a priority now? Not waiting for when something happens, make it a priority right now. Why hold off on writing that book or launching that podcast or opening up that e-commerce store or developing the relationship

you want to have or mending a relationship or forgiving people, whatever it might be. We only have a short amount of time to do it. and being reminded of that consistently can help us overcome procrastination. So now that we've covered the three exercises to help us develop discipline and stop procrastination, I'll wrap this session up with a mindset shift that I think ties everything together beautifully. And it comes from best-selling author and Harvard psychologist Katie Milkman. And she shared it with me when she was on the School of Greatness. One of Katie's primary areas of research is the study of habits. And she found that there is a distinct difference

between those who successfully develop great habits over the long term and those who don't. And it isn't whether someone who was born with discipline or gifted with some sort of mindset advantage over the rest of us. That's not the case. Her research found that the main difference comes down to being flexible about forming habits instead of being rigid with them. For instance, let's say you're a violinist who wants to form a habit of playing music for an hour every single day. Katie found that people

who give themselves flexibility to get that hour in at any time of the day build longer lasting habits than those who tell themselves they need to get that hour in at 6 a.m. or 8 p.m. or whenever else. Now this makes a lot of sense. Life gets busy and sometimes you won't be able to do what you want wanna do at the same time every day. So maybe you had to work really late the night before, or you had a birthday party to go to, or maybe you just like sleeping in every now and then. We're human beings, right?

We don't have to be perfect. Instead of canceling playing your violin altogether, why not get your hour in at night or during your lunch break instead of not doing it all because you missed the session earlier? And by not missing your hour of playing music and giving yourself the flexibility of getting it done whenever you can, over time, you'll begin to develop the habit of never missing it no matter what happens to your schedule. And with that daily practice, you'll eventually believe deeply that you're someone who doesn't fall victim to procrastination.

It's a big one. And there you have it, guys. That's the three-step formula to successfully overcoming procrastination, no matter what your situation or where you're at in your journey. And I really wanted this episode to be actionable and cut through the fluff while still acknowledging that procrastination is normal and can be overcome by anyone with the right game plan. And I found that so many people use procrastination as their mask to hide their feeling of inadequacy, their lack of self-love, and their constant

self-doubt. So if you're struggling with any of these, I get it. I've been there. I know the feelings. I know the insecurities, the doubts, the fears, all that stuff. But I want you to ask yourself, how long are you going to wait? And how long can you afford to wait? And if we want to reach our full potential, then we need to face our fears head on until the fears disappear. This is not easy. This is not comfortable. We need to be truthful to ourselves about our values, about our gifts, and about who we really are. And if we aren't living our most authentic lives, we'll always feel inadequate and insecure because we're trying to be someone we're not. We'll always feel phony. We'll always feel like we don't deserve the abundance that

comes from chasing after our dreams. So we will self-sabotage as a result. And I know some of you have done this in the past. And now I'll end with this final thought. First, I want to acknowledge you for being here. Whether you're listening to this on a run, on your commute to work, while you're finishing up errands. If you're hearing this right now, I truly believe you were meant to be here and you aren't here by an accident. I believe you needed to hear this message today. It's something that's speaking to you, it's calling to you, and it's needed right now.

Second, I want to challenge you to put what you learned into this episode into practice. I want you to begin the process of overcoming procrastination as soon as you can right now. Once you do, let me know how it goes over on Instagram or leave me a review over on Apple Podcasts as a review sharing what you're doing to overcome procrastination right now. And finally, when it comes to stopping procrastination for good, I want you to remember to give yourself grace. Pursue your dreams, but not at the expense of you burning out.

Develop routines that will benefit you, but lean towards being flexible and not rigid like we talked about. Be mindful of the changes you need to make in your life, but don't be overly critical of yourself. If the world is ever going to see your masterpiece come to life, then we need these things from you. We need you to be fully present, passionate, and coming from a place of love in all of your pursuits. And those things can never come from a place of scarcity. So wherever you are, thank you so much for listening. Thank you for being here. And if no one's told you lately, I want to remind you wherever you are, thank you so much for listening. Thank you for being here. And if no one's told you lately, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. I'll see you next time. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed

today's episode and inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's show with all the important links. And also make sure to share this with a friend and subscribe over on Apple Podcasts as well. I really love hearing feedback from you guys. So share a review over on Apple and let me know what part of this episode resonated with you the most. And if no one's told you lately, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great. I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.