The School of Greatness - 305 Tim Storey on Overcoming Huge Obstacles Through Big Belief

Episode Date: March 21, 2016

"Life can knock the shout out of you." - Tim Storey If you enjoyed this episode, check out show notes, video, and more at http://lewishowes.com/305

This is episode number 305 with Tim Story. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Welcome, everyone, to episode number 305, The School of Greatness, the place to be if

you want to be great in your business, your life, your relationships, and your spirituality. Thank you so much for joining me today. We've got an incredible guest on. A new friend of mine that I recently met, his name is Tim Story. And for the past 10 years, Tim has served as an advisor to leaders and celebrities from all around the world. He's helped celebrities like Robert Downey Jr., Kanye West, Christian Slater, and so much more. He is a self-help author, motivational speaker, pastor, entrepreneur, and founder of Tim Story Kids Foundation. He's also done work with Oprah and been interviewed by her on Super Soul Sunday and gone around in one of her speaker series events.

He's an incredible human being. I loved connecting with him and loved sitting across with him in the greatness studio here in Los Angeles. And I believe that I'm going to continue to build a great relationship with this guy. His energy is just infectious. His love, his heart, he's got it all. And in this interview, we cover how to discover your purpose, dreaming and not lowering your expectations, how to be present in a noisy, busy, distracted world, dealing and overcoming grief in your life, getting your shout back. And he talks to me about the importance of shouting, and you'll see what I mean here in a second.

Also, the power of forgiveness and so much more. I hope you guys enjoy this one. Make sure to dive in and let this sink into your hearts because I think you're going to really connect with the message that Tim shares. So without further ado, let me introduce you to the one, the only, Tim Story. Let me introduce you to the one, the only, Tim Story. Welcome back, everyone, to the School of Greatness podcast. Very excited about our guest. His name is Tim Story.

Good to see you. Thanks for coming in, my man. I appreciate it. Good seeing you. We're in Southern California today. Yeah, here at the Greatness Studio, and we just had a great conversation. This is our first time connecting in person, and I'd actually never heard about you until someone said, I got to get you on. And then I started doing some research and I saw one of your videos on stage with Oprah. And I was like, okay, if he's been on Oprah, we got to get him on.

Exactly. And then just connecting with you for the last 30 minutes has been a lot of fun. I feel like we're brothers already. So I'm excited to dive in. And I don't think my audience probably knows too much about you, I'm guessing. Because if I didn't know much about you before, then I'm assuming they didn't know much about you. So hopefully people get connected and we'll tell them where to go follow you everywhere else in a little bit. But I'm curious. Now, you're a spiritual leader.

You've been teaching for two decades, more than two decades now, right? Yeah, a long time. A long time, right? So, yeah, over 30 years now that I think about it. Amazing, 30 years. So I went to seminary. Uh-huh. But I went to seminary to become a humanitarian.

My hero was Mother Teresa. Yes. So I was going to be like the male, cool, chocolate version of Mother Teresa. Yep. So I went to seminary and realized I had a gift to communicate. the Teresa, went to seminary and realized I had a gift to communicate. And so I started communicating inner city schools, teaching on dreams, goals, you know, getting your act together and then started working. And it took off, right? And you've been doing, you had a, you'd have a church for a while. Is that right? Where you were leading your church

and now you'd also do a Bible study you've been doing for years. Yeah. So what happened is that I went through the traditional side of being clergy. Yes. And so I had my own church. And then I traveled as a motivational life coach in churches. As you know nowadays and a lot of people watching and listening,'s the day of joel ostein you know you have these churches that are like 40 000 people now it's amazing so i was in my early

20s i was going to churches of 7 8 9 10 12 000 people still big yeah i was speaking to 85 000 people by the time i was 26 so in my world that's what I did. I motivated people using like the Psalms and the Proverbs. Yes. So inspirational literature to motivate people. Right. But you'd also share stories of real life instances and connect it back to the message and share it that way, right? Exactly. Yes.

Interesting. Now, I'm curious, who was the most influential person in your life growing up? Definitely my mother. My mother is a very strong lady. And we grew up in Compton, California. And my dad was a steel worker. My mother worked at a place called Winchell's Donut Shop. Okay.

And my mother's whole thing was don't do a halfway job. Uh-huh. So we did nothing halfway. Right. Like if you notice for today, I showed up on time. Yes, we did nothing halfway. Like if you notice for today, I showed up on time. Yes, you did. Early. Five minutes early. Plus, I was calling your assistant. I called them twice

to tell him I was on my way. Perfect. Because that's how I do life. My butt is up early. I show up on time. I do what I say. I dot my I's. I cross my T's. That's my mother. Inner city. Compton. Straight up. Get do what I say. I dot my I's. I cross my T's. That's my mother, inner city, Compton, straight up. Get it done. Boom. Be your word. Yeah. I love it. Okay. What was the biggest lesson you think your mom taught you besides that? Kind of like to man up, but it's like, mom, I'm seven.

Right, right. So it was all about taking responsibility. So there was no excuses for things. Sure, sure. Like whether it was about school, trying to make an excuse I couldn't go because I was maybe sick or maybe didn't do my homework. So it was always about taking responsibility. And that has been good for me even at this stage in my life. Do you think a lot of people don't take responsibility for their lives? 100%. You're a life coach.

You coach a lot of celebrities, influencers, CEOs, successful entrepreneurs, probably a lot of people that you're probably not allowed to say their names, but a lot of people are aware of who they are. Do you feel like some of those people aren't responsible for their lives? I think that most people do not take responsibility, as you just said, because it's so easy to fix the blame rather than fix the problem. And so it's somebody else's fault. And we really have become a nation of victims. We've learned these stories that work for us. And it's so easy to become a person that you feel like you're a victim. Then you have a family of victims, right?

You can all just talk about your victim stories together and blame things and drama together, right? Yes. So your life would be a lot better if you take responsibility for your actions, even if it's super painful, yes. What was the most painful thing in your life growing up, would you say? I would say people passing away. I remember when I was a kid, I was an athlete as well. And we were playing touch football on the street.

Never play tackle football on the street. If you know it's good for your arm, slam it against cars and concrete. Yeah, yeah. So I remember I was like nine, and this kid says, I can't play tomorrow because I have to go to a funeral. This is a true story. I said, what do you mean? He goes, oh, like my uncle died. I go, he died? Like how come?

Because when you're eight, nine, and ten, you're not thinking about death. No. So for me, for people to die in my family, my father passed when I was 10 and a half in a car accident. My sister, who was only 20, died two years later in a separate car accident. That was wow. How that just invaded the happiness of the Story family. Right. And how many siblings did you have? We had five children in our family, the parents and then the five children.

So that was like a disruption. See, all of us go through times where we have life interruptions. Any call at 2 o'clock in the morning is not going to be positive. There will be a life interruption that's not going to be positive. Okay? To find out you're sick, breast cancer, leukemia, Lyme disease, that's a life interruption. And so that was an early life interruption at the age of 10. And what do you do from that and were you uh the only son or were there other jeff brothers i i i was the youngest

of the of the family i was 10 my brother was 13 but i will tell you that as you know that what you go through when you go through something what's in you will come out. So my brother headed towards addiction. My other sister headed towards addiction. I headed towards sports. So really what was in us came out and yeah. Wow. How do you think it affected your vision for the rest of your life?

Do you think if your father was around, you would have been doing something completely different, maybe less motivated? Or do you think you your father was around, you would have been doing something completely different, maybe less motivated? Or do you think you're more motivated because of that experience? I think that I would have been doing the same thing because I believe that this is the blueprint of who Tim Story is and that the real you makes a demand on the person that you become. So even when you were playing sports, there was something in you where you were thinking about greatness, wanting to understand greatness. You were more than just a jock athlete. So the real little Timmy story was already making a demand on me at 8, 9, 10, 11, 12. My family used to call me

the king because they said, I mean, here we are lower income, but you still don't think that way. I always knew that I would have influence. I didn't know how to get there, but I knew I'd have it. You didn't know how the mechanism would be, right? Right. Yeah. So I think my father passing gave me more empathy for people that are hurting. That definitely was enhanced.

For people who have lost their parents and haven't fully dealt with it, what's a process you think they could go through, whether on their own, siblings, family members, counselor? What's something you think should be their first step in just processing it or moving forward in a positive way? Obviously, there's going to be a lot of emotions and fears that come up for people in that moment. But what do you think everyone should do? Well, in the book of Ecclesiastes, it says there's a time and a season for everything. There's a time to laugh, a time to dance, a time to be silent, a time to speak. There's a time to mourn. And a person's lifespan now, as most of you know, is around late 70s. People like us, we're going to live to about 103.

Yes. Just so you know. Yes. And I'm going to go out watching SportsCenter at 103, you're going to hear, bam, and then there I go. There you go. But I feel that we have to understand this is life. Life is happy. Life is challenging.

Life is mourning. Life is death. It's all part of it. So if we're fortunate enough to live a long time, a lot of people that we really adore are going to pass. Yeah. So when they pass, what do you do, Tim Story? Number one, you have to understand we all grieve. Grieving is an innate feeling of mourning that lasts, on the average, about two years

where there's a strong grieving in your soul. Okay? Two years. Two years. Now, you will always have remembrance. It's hard to shake that grieving. Yeah. Sometimes you don't need to try.

You need to know that it is something in you that I think that even God put in us because loss is loss. So I say in your loss, think of the legacy. So like who has passed away that's interesting or was very important to you? My grandfather. Okay. Give me two things that he did that made his life so amazing that he left some form of a legacy. He was all about teaching. He was a principal and a headmaster at a number of high schools, and he stood for education and also just like a lighthearted positivity to him. All right.

And his first name? Kimball. Okay. So for Grandpa Kimball, in that case, part of his legacy is sayings he said to you, thoughts, right? Yes. Actions. Jokes. Jokes.

So now you can pass those on to people. So his legacy continues. So take a piece of him and just use that with my energy and however I use it. Gotcha. I like that. And do you think it's wise to grieve with friends and family members, or do you think it's better to do it internally alone? I think grieving comes both ways.

Grieving usually comes when you're by yourself. If you notice that if you've ever had an emotional breakdown in any form or fashion, whether a relationship didn't work. See, when something dies, there's grieving. Yes. So we have grieving for relationships that don't work, jobs that don't work, dreams that don't work. So in fact, there's a lot of people walking around today that are grieving, and that's why they're mad at you if they think you cut them off in a car or they're not nice

to you at the bank. Part of them are are they're grieving. You know, when you get into grieving in older times, there were two things that people did. Number one is there was a posture of grieving where people would almost bow their back like something happened, someone died, I'm grieving. The second thing is there was a change in the volume of their voice where they went down to a whisper wow and i said this to oprah and she loved it i said that life can knock the shout out of you interesting see when you're young you have a shout

when you go into school you're a shout you You never see a teacher going, all right, all you kids, pump up the volume. They're like, shh, little Kirsten. So life can knock the shout out of you. So if you notice that if you've ever had a breakup, there is a grieving process, posture changes, volume changes. Wow. I love this. You know, a lot of times people don't go after their dreams because of fear or they don't end a relationship because of fear. They don't get into a relationship because of fear. There's a lot of things that people don't do or do do based out of fear. I'm curious if a lot of the people that you coach, especially at the highest level, the top 1% that you coach, do they feel fear?

And how do you coach them through the process of overcoming that? I think that everybody's fear is very unique to them. And so it's amazing how many A-level actors that I coach that are still fearful about will they continue to get booked really yes because it's it's it's such a competitive field out here i mean we are literally in the middle of what goes down yeah yeah so let's say you were batman in the 90s val kilmer right how long can you wear the bat suit? Is it going to be George Clooney next? Is it going to be Michael Keaton before that? So there's a lot of fear that is unique to that profession. In sports, NFL, as you know, average guy is in there about three years.

Yeah. Am I going to get injured? Yes. I got the contract I want. Okay. How about marriage? Oh, my gosh, man, I got the contract I want, you know. Okay. How about marriage? Oh my gosh, I'm so happy. He's so amazing.

But now he's playing golf all the time. He's missing. He's not what it used to be. The fear of, is there somebody else in his life? How long will this last? So every fear that we face is unique to the individual. How do you think we should overcome when fear comes up for us, whether we're giving a presentation or any of these other things we talked about? What's a process we can go through ourselves to move through it and get to the other side?

The number one thing is education. When you become educated about something, then it begins to dissipate fear. Like, for instance, people who are afraid of flying, I will talk to them many times, even on airplanes. I'll say, okay, let me help you with something. You can get in an accident so much quicker and it's so much more common by driving a car, by walking in the street because it's not common that a big airplane is going down. So when you educate yourself on a subject that you are fearful, it helps to dissipate the fear. To say it in a Tim Story rhyming way, when you feed your faith with education, you starve

your fears or doubt. So you got to feed your faith and starve your doubt. I love that. I love that. Now, you started a Bible, a Hollywood Bible study. Study. Yeah. Is it 1992? 92. 92 uh what inspired you to start this

who comes and how has it evolved since then it was kind of cool 92 it started with diane cannon um who was married to carrie grant at one time and it was a lot of older Hollywood that would come around. So anywhere from an Elliot Gould to a James Caan to later in life, Lee Iacocca, Charlton Heston. I remember back in the day in the early 90s, we used to have these answering machines. Yes. People still have them in certain remote parts of America. machines yes people still have them in certain remote parts of america but i remember one time during the early days of the hollywood bible study um you know charlton heston used to call himself chuck to me he'd call and goes tim it's chuck when's that bible study it's funny that moses would call my house but we started in the early 90s with about 13 people, and it evolved to now

we have over 2,000 people that consider themselves part of the community of the Hollywood Bible study. But it's more of who has not come. We draw the biggest entertainers in the world. Wow. They either come or walk through or come when they're in crisis. So I think a lot of people who do know me know me from I'm the guy that walks major celebrities through a crisis. Amazing. And where is that hosted and where can people find out about that? Yeah. We can go to TimStory.com.

So I'm S-T-O-R-E-Y. So TimStory.com. S-T-O-R-E-Y. And all the information is on there. All the information is there. Cool. And so that is an awesome thing that I do once a month on Sunset Boulevard. Yeah.

We do it at an amazing studio. And this coming study, Oprah's people are sending the cameras to do another special on the study. But it's an awesome thing. Again, I use Psalms, Proverbs to inspire people. I love that. They come from all walks of life. All faiths come. Sure, sure. And what are some tools you use to get people to be present? There's a lot of people today, we were talking about this before, that we've got so many opportunities coming our way,

and a lot of people who don't have opportunities but are just kind of walking through life, and a lot of people who don't have opportunities but are just kind of walking through life frustrated, maybe about their job, about whatever. What's something that you teach people on how to be present and fully in the moment with all the clutter or the opportunities that come their way? I think one of the easiest things that I do is I teach people just to stop, to look, and to listen.

It's very simple. Stop, look, and listen. Okay. So let's say me and you are going to go see the Lakers. Kobe is finishing this year. All right. So you're busy. You're running like 27 companies.

I'm running three. So you're super busy. But we've been excited. We're going to go see Kobe. And let's say they're playing Cleveland and LeBron James. I'm from Ohio, so Cleveland's my boy. There we go. So if we were to go and you did not stop, look, and listen, you're not going to be a great company.

Because I'm going to be talking to you, but you're going to be tripping. Because your mind is going to be everywhere, right? You're not in the moment. You could be distracted by your phone. You could be distracted on your businesses. You could be distracted on what's tomorrow morning. Stop. Stop.

Pay attention. Where am I? Oh, I'm at dinner with my mother. Oh, she hasn't seen me in three weeks. Or, oh, I'm at dinner with my mother. Oh, she hasn't seen me in three weeks. Or, oh, I'm on a date. So even before I got here today, I had been talking with somebody who's pretty cool. He's going at it. I go, I got to get off the phone. He goes, oh, no, no, I got to talk more. I go, I got to get off the phone. 10 minutes before I came here, I turned my radio off,

and I would not talk to this guy who's powerful because I wanted to get in the moment to face you. So I didn't come in here with a bunch of clutter. I came in here in the moment. Clear, ready. Right. So stop, look, look, stop, look, where am I? Pay attention. Listen. Listen to what is taking place around you. Man, if you're by a lake, hear the ducks quack. Right? Be fully present. As you're saying, fully feeling, fully alive. Stop, look, listen.

I love that. We were talking about meditation before we got on here. What do you say or how do you respond to people that say they don't have the time to meditate or they just don't think it's worth it or it's too woo-woo-y? What are your thoughts on it? Yeah, I think that meditation is simply what we're talking about and that's stopping and it's shifting your satellite dish. And it's shifting your satellite dish. So, you know, back in the day, you would have these big satellite dishes and we could go to somebody's house like in the late 80s. And they'd be like, watch this.

I flip my TV here and I get Canadian football. I go over here, I get the Minnesota Vikings. Right, right. Okay. So wherever you shift your satellite dishes, that's what you pick up. So, again, if you're shifting it on my kid smoking weed and he's ticking me off, or I'm shifting it on I'm 42 pounds overweight, and that's what you're always thinking about, that's what you're going to pull in. Okay? All of the secret.

Okay? The way you see it, it comes closer to you. Same thing with meditation. If I shift my satellite dish to a place of peace, that's what's going to come towards me. So from a biblical standpoint, to me, I shift my satellite dish to the all things are possible network. I meditate on the things of God. I meditate on biblical scriptures. I did it today. As soon as I woke up for 20 minutes, I meditated on Psalms 23 because that's what I'm into. And it put me in a really cool place. I love that.

What would you say is a daily ritual for you? Maybe three or four things that are non-negotiable that you do every single day that you believe empower you to get the most out of that day? Okay. So I'm going to open up about weaknesses first. Because I speak for a living, okay, 73 countries, I speak around the world. I'm on stage. There is a buzz to being on stage. Mostly if the crowd's super big they're energetic yes it's a

high it's a high so i used to wake up as happy as i am kind of down like oh man man why why do i feel so tired but it could have been a phenomenal night so one of the things that I do that I cannot get around is I get up and I either walk or run every single morning of my life. I don't care how I feel. I got to do it. First thing you do? I did it this morning. Wow. First thing I did is I meditated.

Yes. So I'm feeding my spirit. Second thing I did, I went to the park that's not far from my house. I walk, run, or I'm a basketball player. So I go to the gym. I shoot baskets two to three times a week. We got to play some pickups soon. Let's do it.

We still got it. We still got it. So, I mean, I'm 55 years of age, and I'm still hustling, running. That's great. I mean, I'm 55 years of age and I'm still hustling, running. Wow, that's great. So I have to do that to stay in the zone. And balanced probably. To be balanced.

Yeah. So the meditation, the exercise, and then here's another thing. Every day, me and you have a bag of seeds. I'm going to sprinkle either good seeds or bad seeds. An attitude, bad seeds. A grouchy little way about me, bad seeds. Every day, I plant good seeds everywhere on purpose, no matter my mood. Whether I walk in 7-Eleven, tell people great things about themselves, motivating people,

calling my mother, calling people that they don't think I'm going to call them. Every day, I try to empty out my bag of seeds. I love that. One of the themes that I get from people that I interview like you who come on here is that we try to make someone else's day every day. And I think if we at least make one person's day every single day, that's pretty good. Yes. If you can make two, three, or the maximum number of people's day every single day,

whether going to, again, getting your coffee and just smiling or saying hello or paying for the person's coffee behind you, whatever it may be, greeting people, just being courteous human beings, finding a way to make someone smile, I feel like that's a pretty solid day. Yes, I agree. That's good. Yeah, that's cool. What do. Yes, I agree. That's good. That's cool. What do you think is missing in your life?

You've had incredible success in a lot of areas. Is there anything missing? Yeah, I think so. I feel that for me, coming from lack, I came from lack. So we wanted converse, but we got something that were like that. Right. We wanted Levi's, but we got like plebe eyes. So I think that sometimes it's hard for me to grasp how blessed I am.

Like I really enjoy what people are doing for me and how they treat me. Because I'm treated really well. But I don't think I really really take it in the way I should. And that's not because I don't appreciate it.

It's almost like I'm almost afraid to pull it in so deep where I'll get too comfortable and not stay on my grind. Does that make sense? Of course, yeah. So the very thing I teach people to pause for applause is sometimes hard for me to do. Like I was in Rome a couple months ago. A kid from the inner city? I was in Rome?

Okay, that's like my 12th trip there. And I'm sitting there at this really nice restaurant, 11 o'clock at night, because you know they're like eating late. And the friend of mine who does well was saying, do you understand how great your life is and the things you get to do? I go, yeah. I mean, it's good. Yeah. But I was almost afraid to just – Own it.

Take it in. But does that make sense a little bit to you? Yeah, of course. So what would your coach teach you on how to take it in? What would you teach someone else who is – or coach someone else into that? Yeah. I think that I have to realize that i could take it in and that doesn't mean if i take it in it's going to go away yeah like you're going to get softer or you're

going to get less motivated or what do you mean well what i mean what i mean number one that number two is that i think a lot of people who are living above themselves meaning they had a certain thought goal standard of what they thought greatness was they exceeded it where i'm at dude i'm playing in the bonus round right i'm like playing the pinball machines right and balls are coming out yeah yeah so when you go from like being normal and you're at these celebrity homes that are like $28 million and like, so Tim, do you play polo? It's like in Compton we weren't doing that much. Right.

Interesting. I love it. What do you think people should – we talked about dreams earlier and you have a foundation where you have the importance of teaching kids how to dream. Yes. the importance of teaching kids how to dream, essentially. How valuable is it for adults to dream who have maybe lost their dream or who have given up on themselves or don't believe they're worthy of having it all or having what you have or what they would want? How would you coach someone in thinking how to dream? Without a dream, you're not living because the reality is that dreams are in us.

They're in our DNA. We were born with dreams inside of us. That's why you take any four-year-old to Toys R Us and they go, I want that. I want that. I want that. And if you don't get it, they get upset because Right. Because they feel like you could fulfill that dream. Sure, sure. Okay?

So kids are dreaming. I'm in Louisville, Kentucky. I'm speaking to a bunch of kids that are like seven, eight, nine. I go, what do you want to be when you grow up? LeBron James. What do you want to be? The president. What do you want to be, little girl?

A princess. Okay. Now, one of them said, I want to be bankrupt. I want to be married seven times. Right. So dreams are in us, right? So when you dial into the real you, you're a dreamer. We're all dreamers.

Yeah. But as you know, and you do this and you write great books, is that some people have minimized their dreams and they have lowered the ceiling of expectation. Why do we do that? Why do people do that? Okay, here we go. See this room here? It's a beautiful room that we're in.

Great space. Great view. Thank you. But in America, you have to have an eight-foot ceiling as a standard. It's probably eight feet, nine feet, eight and a half feet. So most people that I life coach were raised in families, the ceiling was lower than that, the expectation. I like George Lopez. George Lopez says funny things.

He says the whole thing about his family was don't get pregnant, don't get pregnant. It was never like go to Yale, go to Stanford his family was don't get pregnant don't get pregnant it was never like go to yale go to stanford don't get pregnant something as opposed to do something right and then one of his aunts that would be called a tia in spanish said you know george how dare you with these big dreams you're gonna end up on the streets and he goes yeah i did the Hollywood Walk of Fame. So I think that a lot of us, the ceiling was so low. So in dreaming, man, you got to raise the roof. That's why people are reading your books. That's why people are following you. That's why people are getting in your school, which I think they should.

That's why you have a presence because people are saying, dude, hook me up to the real me. I love that. Man, I love that. Do you always talk about dreams in your speeches? Is it an important thing for you or does it just come up every now and then? No, no. It is the essence of who I am because my dream came true. And there are other dreams.

What was your dream as a kid? My dream as a kid was to be Tim Story and I am now him. There you go. Okay. And so what that was is that that was I wanted to inspire people for their lives to get better. And so now when I walk in any airport, in any country, people come up to me and say, dude, I saw you in 97. I saw you in 99. I saw you in 2003. I saw you on Oprah. I saw you on that show. I saw you on Fox News Live. That is crazy. So for that, I'm like, thank you, God.

So again, I'm now waiting for what is the next assignment. And what is the next dream for you? Do you know? Yeah, I think. But to say this, I say it this way. There's a difference between a good idea and a God idea. I think sometimes people are messing up because they're trying to find some good idea for their life. In my way of thinking, I believe that God spoke my life into my soul when I was a kid.

So I want to just listen to what the God idea is for me. So part of the next God idea unfolding for me is doing what I do. And that is, I have a church now in Yorba Linda called the Congregation. We have the Hollywood Bible Study. I mentor people. I get celebrities out of trouble. Yeah, I'm unfolding. That's your current assignment. Yeah. Yeah. That's my assignment. If you could see your life in the next 15, 20 years like you were a child right now and you have this whole life ahead of you as you do, what would you say would be the big dream if you achieved it? Well, I do a lot of studying as you do.

And I was reading some information on people's happiness. And you have interviewed some of the best coaches that talk about happiness. But a lot of people, if they let themselves, get real happy around 70. And so I'm a ways off from that. But one of the reasons why is because they start to be okay with themselves,

with their successes and their shortcomings. They accept it. Yes. Yeah. And it's that idea of I may not be what I want to be, but thank God I'm not what I used to be. It's like I'm 70, whatever. Yeah, yeah.

Okay? Uh-huh. So I think for me, I don't think like my 20s and 30s of what's next. But yet I got crazy good projects going on that I won't even talk about. Sure. But that's not what's filling my head today. What's filling my head is I was driving down the street coming to see you. Yeah.

And then I'm going to chill for a minute. Then I'm going to go see somebody that's in the entertainment business for dinner. I'm in the moment. Yeah. I love it. You talked about the shout. What is it you said again? We lose our shout?

Yeah. Life can knock the shout out of you. As opposed to the other word. Yeah. So when it knocks the shout out of you, are we able to get it back ever? And if so, how? Okay. Because I interview people too,

and you're very good at what you do. Give me two times. Life knocked the shout out of you playing. You know, my dream was to be a professional athlete. I made it happen. And then I got injured and I had to retire. So that was,

that was a big time. Big one. Huge one. Cause you did that all big time. Big one. Huge one. Because you did that all your life. And the dream was over. That's part of how people saw you. You're tall. How tall are you?

6'4". Okay, you're like 6'4". It was my identity for myself. Phenomenal shape. That's your identity. People see you places. Do you play football? And now you have to say no.

Right. Okay, second time life knocked the shot out of you probably when my dad got in a car accident and uh essentially he was in a coma for months and then we had to teach him how to write and talk and read and you know go to the bathroom and do everything again okay when i was in college and just not having my father to be my mentor and you know my father's still alive, but just not being that in a relationship, a completely different relationship. I felt like I had to do it more on my own without him supporting. Okay.

So on a scale of 1 to 10, what would you say is the severity of what happened with your dad? Scale of 1 to 10, severity of what happened in football. Both probably tens. Okay? So those are two major things in different categories. Yes. Okay? So part of getting your shout back, and don't ever forget this, in life you can have the

right plan, be the right person, you better be around the right partners. So much of getting your shout back is who's in your inner circle. Right. Because you're going to need to plug into somebody else's oxygen. How powerful is that? Absolutely. And so what happens, most people,

when they get the shout knocked out of them, they isolate themselves. This happened to my dad. I'm isolate themselves. This happened to my dad. I'm isolating myself. This happened to my career. I'm isolating myself. Plan, person, partners. You get around the right people that are speaking life into you, helping you get out there,

filling you with great things. Hey, read that book. Listen to his podcast. Watch that TED Talk, whatever. 100%. Yeah. Get around the right people. It'll help pump up the volume in your life.

I love that because there was times when I was growing up in middle school, high school, more like elementary, middle school, where I wasn't believing in myself. Yes. But that one coach that just saw something in me and said, hey, listen, Lewis, I believe in you. You got this. And gave me that extra little attention or that energy, sparked something in me, someone I respected and trusted. Yes.

Like, okay, if he believes in me, then I can believe in myself. But if it was a coach that says, you suck, you're not worth anything, it's going to put me in a downward spiral. And the interesting thing about your life is this, is that part of these setbacks that have taken place even with you in sports have brought you to that bestselling book, The School of Greatness. Absolutely. that best-selling book, The School of Greatness.

Absolutely. Because of the adversity, right, it helped bring something inside of you out. One of the chapters is called Turning Adversity into Your Advantage. Ah. And seeing it as the opportunity and the lesson that how can I use this to serve myself and others around me from these lessons. But like you said, a lot of people shy away or isolate when the adversity hits. And I use this to serve myself and others around me from these lessons. But like you said, a lot of people shy away or isolate when the adversity hits. So I think that's really powerful.

I like that. What do you think is the most adverse time in your adult life? I would say, and I don't talk about it much, but going through a divorce. I never thought I was a guy who would get divorced. When I was in high school, I was funny. I was happy. I played sports. I never had bad breakups with anybody. And to think that as an adult, you can go through life and then it didn't work. Man, there was a lot of guilt, shame, pain in that that and i think that most people have treated me really fair about that because either if they haven't been through a divorce maybe their parents

did or somebody that they care about so i think a lot of it was about not meeting my own personal expectations. And it took me to a place of guilt and shame that took me years to fight through. When did this happen? It was years ago, but it took me years to fight through, like truly. And so that was a different thing. But now that I reflect, I was definitely going through mourning and grieving.

Because remember we talked about grieving? So, you know, divorce is divided force. So you have force, now you have divided force. Wow. So no wonder you feel like you're freaking getting ripped. Right, right. Wow. Yeah.

But now I do a lot of things. I write for a website called First Wives World that has a lot of people that follow, and I do conferences for them. And so, I mean, I'm able to speak out and help a lot of people that have been through challenges. I don't get so deep into my story because I have respect for my ex, but I think that we all go through some form of divorce. Of course. That was the biggest thing I think I've had to face as an adult. I bet. I can only imagine.

Talk to me about forgiveness and how powerful is forgiveness for yourselves and for forgiving others. powerful is forgiveness for yourselves and for forgiving others. Well, the more successful you become, and if you learn from the school of greatness, whoa, crazy stuff's going to come at you. The bigger the dream, the bigger the obstacles. I only have like eight stalkers now. I think I used to have 13, but they're bona fide. Yes.

And so it's amazing that when you start doing well, it can bring out the best in people. And it can bring out the worst in people. Yeah. So I've had people steal money from me from the inside, try to hurt me from the inside, which again, I could not believe because I was the nice guy. I could not believe this stuff was coming. But the more I talk about this, everybody has these stories. Yes.

Whether it happened from their own brother or sister or their own mother tried to sabotage them. Yeah. So, if you don't forgive forget and go forward okay you'll retain remember and regress so you have a choice wow are you going to forgive forget and go forward or retain, remember, and regress. So it is a choice. If it's in the category of your ex, for all you that are watching and listening, man, you got to forgive, forget, go forward. See, it's not-

Or you'll be holding on to that in the next- You're holding on to it. Yeah, yeah. So I don't go for it when they say, you know what? I forgive, but I don't forget. Right. Well, then you just missed it. Right.

Because what's going to happen, you're going to retain, remember, and you're going to regress. It's going to hold you back from your greatness in the next whatever. 100%. Then you're going to have triggers. Oh, yes. Now, here's a difficult thing. I've had many triggers in my life that I've overcome. Because right down the street over here, Sunset Boulevard.

Many triggers in my life that I've overcome. Because right down the street over here is Sunset Boulevard. Now, I work with people that have big billboards of their exes up on Sunset Boulevard. So could you imagine? In the next movie or whatever. Right. Exactly. You're rolling down the street.

Oh, my God. You see your half-naked ex on the billboard. That's what happened. Right. But if you forgive, forget. There's no trigger when you see that. There's no happened. Right. But if you forgive, forget. There's no trigger when you see that. There's no trigger. Yeah.

I help people stop the triggers. I'm good at that. How do you forgive? If you feel like someone's done something so wrong to you or that's your story. Yes. That someone's done something wrong to you. And how do you forgive yourself if you feel like, man, I just committed something really bad to someone. Or I cheated or did this or abused them in some way? How does someone forgive themselves or others?

Okay. So to forgive someone else, number one, you got to look at how has this impacted my life? Okay. So again, let's say if somebody left you or hurt you or stole money from you or abused you. It's a major thing. How is this affecting my life? When you take inventory and you say, ooh, but now I don't trust men or now I don't trust women. Right.

Now I become cynical. So when you take inventory and realize, man, that has affected my life. Okay? So what do I do? I now have to consider the source. This is very powerful stuff. Hurt people do what? Hurt people.

Most of these people that hurt you, hurt me, hurt people, they hurt people. So I consider the source of what that person did to me. It's not going to help me to try to get even. I have to consider the source that they were hurt in some form or fashion and they came against me out of that place. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Even if they're a major manipulator, that's still coming from their pain.

Yeah. So how do we process that? How do you think someone should do it? I mean, it sounds great. Yeah, it sounds great. Oh, let me just figure out the source and then let it go. But some people deal with a lot of emotional pain. These triggers aren't just easily forgettable.

Okay. What's the process? Should they hire a coach? Should they write down some exercises? What should they do, you think? The process is that you have to then rearrange what's in your life. And that's why so many therapists, I work with the greatest therapist on the planet. I just talked to two today because a lot of entertainers I work with, I work with them plus a therapist, is that you have to start reaching for things that are healthy. So let's say a person that goes through a breakup, which happens in a lot of counseling I do. The lady may say to me, I was with him.

I gave him 27 years of my life. He has an affair with this woman. Okay, she's bleeding. I will suggest things like Pilates, yoga. Many times they get ticked off at me. What's that going to help me with? For what he did, Pilates, yoga,

meditation. Yes. Read the School of Greatness. Okay. All right. Painting. Go to one of those classes where they paint and drink wine. Do something different. Yeah. Okay. Fill yourself with positive things.

It's like people that are trying to lose weight. A really good coach will go into the refrigerator, remove all the awful stuff, and put healthy things in the refrigerator. So you got to start making healthy things more accessible. I love that. Yeah. Just fill yourself up with good positivity and you're going to start to feel better. Heck yeah. It'll change you.

Yeah. And I know this because I work with people, even this morning, that have gone through awful things in this works. Yeah, of course. What do you tell people that feel like they haven't found out what their mission or their purpose is? They're not sure why they're here. Yes. What they should be doing.

How do you guide them through that process of discovering? Yes. Number one, be patient because hopefully your life is going to be a marathon, not a sprint. Right, right, right. So be patient with yourself. Some things you decide, some things you discover. life is going to be a marathon, not a sprint. Right, right, right. So be patient with yourself. Some things you decide, some things you discover. I think in your life that most of what I'm hearing from you, you've discovered.

I don't think you just sat on a United flight one day coming from Hawaii and said, you know, I think I'm going to be me. Right, right, right. Okay? And then I want to give you props because I was telling you about a friend of mine, Sean Connell, that told me about you. And a lot of people are in my ear about stuff. And I got so much going on, I don't always pay attention to it all. But he's like, dude, you got to get into Sean Connell.

I mean, you got to get into your life in the lewis and so he showed me some information on you and so could you imagine in your life because you discovered this next step of your life that now you're impacting even some of us that are in this business right that's pretty cool right that's That's very cool. So again, some things in life, you decide some things you discover. The discover usually happens when you don't expect it. You're sitting somewhere and you go, man, people are hurting.

I'm going to help the homeless. Or man, I love art. I think I'm going to start painting. Some of the greatest people that I've worked with, like Vidal Sassoon, who is my buddy, eating breakfasts on Cannon Drive in Beverly Hills, that was something he discovered being Vidal Sassoon. It was something that came out of him, yes. Wow, okay.

I love that. A few questions left for you, and this has been inspiring, so thank you for being here. I really appreciate it. What's one question – I asked you this beforehand, but what's one question that no one's really ever asked you that you wish they would ask and that you could answer? Yeah. No one has ever asked me, can everybody be great in a big way? Okay. So can everyone be great in a big way? Okay. So can everyone be great in a big way? Well, because here's what – when people think of greatness, they think of – like right now, they think of Richard Branson. Okay. They think of Elon Musk.

Right. They think of these guys that are over the top and have potential to send stuff to the moon. Exactly. Literally. That's what these guys are up to. Right, right, right stuff to the moon. Exactly. Literally. That's what these guys are up to. Right, right, right. With their hobbies. Yes.

So I think we need to just really get honest here. Okay. All right? Can everyone be great? Can everybody be great in this grandiose way? Can they be great? Kids want to believe they can. That's why they have their own Instagrams.

On that, they're great. On their Facebook, they're great. Can everybody be great in a big way? So I say yes. But what you consider great may be different than what another person considers great. I love it. Because to me, greatness is being a mother of three and you're an awesome mother, but you maybe never wrote a bestselling book. Right.

Exactly. So that's where guys like us need to really pull people into their own greatness, right? That's part of what you're doing. Yes. Because it's all relative. It is, yes. My last question you'll be able to answer is close to what you're talking about,

so I'm excited to hear. Yeah, so I think no one's ever asked me that question, and I think that, like for me, I don't chase dreams. You notice I'm very laid back, and I got a lot of good stuff going on. I don't chase dreams. I cooperate with them. It's a big difference. I'm very laid back and I got a lot of good stuff going on. I don't chase dreams. I cooperate with them.

It's a big difference. I'm not chasing anything. I turn stuff down that people think is great. Like you could have your own talk show, daytime. I'm not in the mood right now. I might be in three years. Right. I love it.

Yeah. So you think we're all born for the potential to be great then 100 yeah you're born to maximize your life yes so if you're an inner city school teacher making 33 000 a year in my opinion you're just as great as warren buffett if that's what buffett's been called to do right i love it um if you had someone handed you a trillion dollars, let's say, and said you get to solve or an unlimited amount of money that would solve one problem in the world and you had the power to choose one thing out there to solve and say instantly it's fixed or in the next couple of years it's going to be solved through this money, What would that thing be that you would put the money towards?

That is a great question, not even a good question. That is a great question. I would say that I would solve a problem having to do with an illness. solve a problem having to do with an illness. Okay? And I would say, obviously, there's so many that we'd like to solve, but I would solve the problem of cancer. You know, when you see these athletes, because we both love sports,

and they're wearing pink, because in that case it's it's breast awareness or cancer cancer awareness month breast cancer month yeah and you you see the awareness and you and i go to some of these beverly hills functions and about cancer and the whole live strong to be on the inside of of watching someone die of cancer to see see the suffering and the agony that happens in so many cases, to be able to eliminate that form of death, that would be something that I would do. You've experienced this firsthand. You've seen this.

Yes. And it's not even in family members. It's in people that I help, in families, life coaching people, to see that type of illness and how it takes somebody down. Yeah. I would eliminate that with my money. That's powerful. Final few questions. Tim, what are you most grateful for in your life recently? I am grateful for the peace I have in my mind. I think that a lot of people don't have peace. I'm in these houses. I'm in the biggest houses in the world.

I'm in the biggest ones in all countries, and I meet with senators, presidents, leaders, people who can buy and sell everything, and see that they have no peace. I am most grateful that I have peace in my life. I can go to sleep with the TV off and be at peace. I can drive and not have the music on and be at peace. I can drive and not have the music on and be at peace. I could see somebody be better than what I do,

maybe they're three times better, and be at peace. I have peace and man, you can't pay for that. That's great. This is a question I like to ask everyone. It's the last day for you. Many, many years, decades from now.

Yeah, I'm 103. Yes. And every book you've ever written, every speech you've ever given, every video online, article is erased for some reason that you've ever created. Yes. Any word you've ever put out is gone except for the memories of people listening to it. And all your friends and family are there. You're at peace mentally, emotionally, everything physically. And they say everything is erased but we have a piece of paper.

Yes. And you get to write down three truths. Yes. Three things that you know to be true about everything you've experienced that you could pass on to us is essentially our Bible of your wisdom. Yes. Three lessons. What would you write down as your three truths?

Okay. Number one, I got to go to my spiritual base. And that is, is that truly that God has a plan for our lives. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Do not lean on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge him. He shall direct your path. So number one truth is God has a plan for your life. Okay?

Secondly is that God is okay with you. Psalms 103, God does not treat you as your sins deserve. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those that honor him. See, people need to know that. I think people who aren't even spiritual and who think they don't even believe in God are trying to chase something because they don't know that life is okay with them. So God has a plan and God's okay with it. Okay? And the third is this thing I said to you earlier,

is that you may not be what you want to be, but thank God you're not what you used to be. In other words, give yourself some doggone credit for your growth. Right? Yeah. No matter what you've been through, if a guy that's listening or watching today has been divorced five times, if he was incarcerated 27 years,

at that moment you're not. You may not be what you want to be, but thank god you're not what you used to be be okay with that i love that that's a great truth um before i ask the final question i want to acknowledge you tim for your incredible contribution and gift that you bring to the world i think it's amazing i'm so glad we got connected and i'm so glad to hear about how you support so many of our youth and teaching them how to dream, but also supporting so many of, uh, you know, the world's leaders to overcome their obstacles, their distractions, their stories so that they can inspire more

people as well. So I want to acknowledge you for your incredible gifts, for your constant commitment year after year, decade after decade of stepping up into your best self, and for probably the biggest thing, being at peace, because I think that's a big thing that most of us haven't figured out yet. So I acknowledge you for leading the way. And I thank you for that. And I embrace your words. And I will say this, that I'm so proud of you, mostly at your stage of life, the influence that life has given you, and the way you're handling the platform.

So right back at you. I appreciate that. Thanks. Before I ask the final question, where can we connect with you? What should we do? TimStory.com, S-T-O-R-E-Y.com. Go sign up for his newsletter. Check out all your videos.

You've got great stuff there. There's a great video of you speaking with Oprah on her stage. I recommend checking that out first. And also you're on Instagram and Twitter and everywhere, right? So, yeah, if they go to TimStory.com, that'll be my universe. We're doing some great projects coming up. You can get on TimStory On Demand and get a lot of information that we do. You can also go to Oprah.com and see things that we're doing with her.

And we have some new projects going on with her and her company. But TimStory.com. Perfect. And come to the Bible study. Check it out. Yes. See you in person. You've got all the information there.

And your whole tour, and you've got it all up there, right? It's all there. Awesome. Perfect. And the final question is, and you also alluded to it earlier, it's what's your definition of greatness? Definition of greatness. Definition of greatness. Three levels of living, almost, most, and utmost. Almost means not quite. So greatness is not to be almost. It's the opposite of almost. It's to manifest an utmost life that makes one great. So you know you're not being great when you're almost. You're the opposite. I almost got the job. I was almost happy. I was almost this. I was almost that. The opposite of that is to manifest an utmost life, which is a life of greatness. Good story. Thanks for coming on, man. Appreciate it. This was great. I hope you enjoyed this episode.

Thank you, guys, again, so much for being here. If you did enjoy it, make sure to share this with your friends, lewishouse.com slash 305. And check out the full show notes and video interview with Tim Story. If you have not yet subscribed to my YouTube channel, make sure to go to youtube.com slash lewishouse. We're putting out two, three videos a week. High sure to go to youtube.com slash lewishouse. We're putting out two, three videos a week. High production value. Great quality.

People who are finding them now are sharing them like crazy, leaving tons of comments. They're getting consumed in the rabbit hole of content and information because we're just creating some great stuff.

So I hope you subscribe over on YouTube and also subscribe to this podcast on iTunes if you are not yet a subscriber. Again, all the show notes and full video interview and resources are at lewishouse.com slash 305. I hope you enjoyed this episode with Tim. Again, a great guy that I look forward to connecting with more in the future. And I hope you guys will continue to stay connected to his message as well. Thank you again so much for being here. You guys know what time it is.

It's time to go out there and do something great. Thank you.