The School of Greatness - 44 Daniel Negreanu: World's #1 Poker Player on Peak Performance and Stepping Into Greatness

Episode Date: December 16, 2013

In this episode he opens up about the mindset shift it took to overcome his limiting beliefs and the keys to his success for becoming the #1 player in the world. Please welcome this weeks professor of greatness, Daniel Negreanu.

This is episode number 44 with Daniel Negronin. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Yo, yo, yo, what's up, greats?

Thanks so much for tuning in today. I'm very excited about this episode with the one and only number one poker player in the world, Daniel Negreanu. Now, I used to watch Daniel play poker about 10 years ago when I was in college, and I can't believe I was actually in college 10 years ago now. But I used to watch him on ESPN late at night, and I thought I'd try to be cool and play in the dorms with all the fellas, $20 cash games and play hold them until like 4am in the offseason. And I was never any good, but I thought I'd try to be good and be competitive. But I was just

always too. I could just I couldn't really, I didn't have a good poker face. So it was pretty embarrassing. And I never really won anything. But it was a fun journey and it really helped me appreciate how challenging it actually is to be a great poker player. And I was a bad poker player in one college dorm. And let alone to be the number one poker player in the world,

it's pretty incredible what Daniel's been able to create. And what's even more inspiring is that he used to be number one, then lost his mojo for a while, let's say his mojo. And then he got it back recently and won a couple bracelets and became number one in the world again. And I asked him, what was this entire transition? How come he was at the top? Then he lost it all. Let's say he didn't lose it all, but he wasn't at the top anymore. And then he raised back up to the top.

It was very interesting. I got to talk to Daniel before we started recording this interview. And we both went through the same type of peak performance leadership training. And he told me that a lot of the success was due to what he learned about himself through this type of leadership, peak performance, emotional intelligence training. I thought it was very interesting to hear about how he went from not being number one to getting back up there pretty quickly and how he's maintained that ever since then.

So it's very interesting. And he talks about it briefly in this episode. But it's pretty cool what we dive into. And we talk about really how Daniel got started in poker and his first five to six trips to Vegas that really ended in a failure and what he learned from those experiences. We also talk about the most important element to becoming a successful poker player, why experiential learning is so important, how table presence makes you a stronger poker player. How to use feedback to maximize your growth. We also talk about how to build confidence like a

professional poker player in your business, in your career, and in real life. Talk about the mental and physical preparation for top poker players and really how you can apply using the same type of mental preparation in your own life. Talk about the special skills for connecting with others and a lot more in this episode. I'm very excited to be bringing in Daniel to share with you all of his amazing wisdom in this episode. And I'm excited about this. I'm very pumped to introduce you guys to Daniel.

Again, number one poker player in the world. So let's go ahead and jump into it right now. Hey, everyone, and thanks again for coming back on the School of Greatness. I've got a very special guest on today. His name is Daniel Negreanu, currently ranked number one in the world in poker. And this is a guy that I was kind of following when I thought I was going to get into poker about 10 years ago when I was a college cocky kid, late night in the poker tables in the dorm rooms. And I would always watch on TV on ESPN when they were talking about Daniel and how amazing he was as a poker player. So I'm very excited to have you on.

Thanks for coming on, Daniel. It's a pleasure to be on. And we were introduced through a mutual friend, Chris Lee, who trained both of us in a leadership training. And we were just chatting before this interview about what it's done for you. And it's done some amazing things in my life and career and relationships as well. So I wanted to happen to that eventually, but I'm just really interested in learning about your life and your success and kind of the patterns that you've seen throughout the years. And I kind of want to just dive in to when you first got introduced to poker

and what attracted you to playing poker in the first place? Well, I started playing poker when I was a teenager. And really before that, I was a pool player. I was a snooker player in Toronto and got into sort of the gambling scene, if you will, meeting a lot of guys who do that. And all of a sudden, I started playing poker, and I noticed the same guys kept winning. And my competitive spirit was always very, very strong. And I started to try to figure out what they were doing. And as much as I would have loved to have been a basketball player or a hockey player,

I was like 5'9", a buck 40. That wasn't going to happen. And I was too big to be a jockey, too small to be an athlete. I'm stuck in the middle. And poker kind of really satisfied that competitive spirit that was inside me. Amazing. So you started getting into poker and well, you noticed a bunch of other guys were winning. So when did you realize the first moment that you actually had some skill or some natural talent and that you were good?

Well, you know, when you're young, when you're that age, when you're a teenager, you just think you know everything. You've got it all figured out. So there were many moments where I thought I had it all figured out. And then I'd get my head kicked in and be like, wait a minute, maybe not. Like the first few times I went to Las Vegas in my early 20s, like 21-year-old kid, I'm going to take over the poker world. And then walking home with my tail between my legs and my pockets empty because these guys have seen hometown heroes come and go. And I remember those being really important moments, those failures that I had the first pockets empty because you know these guys have seen hometown heroes come and go and uh you know

i remember those being really important moments those failures that i had the first five six times i went to vegas in terms of uh me digging deeper and looking for an extra layer of determination to get through it and to just you know realize that okay if i if i'm gonna win there i'm gonna have to just get better and when did you how many times did it take until you went to vegas where you actually came back either breaking even or not completely losing, but you know, seeing like, Oh, okay, I've got an opportunity here. I think I'd say about the first five, six trips I took, uh, were non-successful and, you know, it was a big adjustment period, but probably within about eight, seven, eight months of just

going there back and forth from Toronto. What I do is I'd go to Vegas, blow my load, go back to Toronto, rebuild my bankroll, go to Vegas, blow my load, you know, rinse, repeat, right? Until I finally figured out what was, you know, what adjustments I needed to make to be successful. So you were like the king in Toronto then you were just like cleaning up at all these different little poker tournaments and building a name for yourself and you'd go test it in the big leagues and you'd come home not winning a dime and keep practicing and learning. I'm assuming you'd be reading all the books and studying and researching anything you could in the meantime, right?

Well, not exactly. Actually, for me, the real lessons I got was watching people. So if I knew a guy was a successful player, I'd watch him for like a week. I'd dissect what he does well. If you ever saw that show called Heroes, there was a guy was a successful player, you know, I'd watch him for like a week. I'd dissect what he does well. If you ever saw that show called Heroes, there was a guy named Siler who was a superhero. And what he did was he sucked the talents out of other people and then left them for dead. And I use that analogy because essentially what I would do is I'd spend a week profiling a guy, figuring out what he does well, take what I like, incorporate it in my game, and get rid of the rest. Then I'd move on to a next person next week.

So for me, it wasn't a lot of books. It wasn't a lot of that. It was mostly just practical mentorship that I was just doing on my own with people in the game. How many hours were you putting in a week in those first few years? Well, as a teenager, I wanted to show my parents that I was serious about this and that I wasn't just gambling. So I would play Monday to Friday from noon to eight. I'd put in 40 hour weeks. I did care. I'd kept detailed records. I knew how well I did on Thursday afternoons versus Monday nights. And this is before software. I mean, I just handwritten all

this stuff and I'd keep track of expenses, the whole deal. So I knew what my hourly rate was. I think when I was 18 years old, I was probably making about $44 an hour in the game I was playing. But I was very meticulous in that regard in terms of record keeping. Now, would you say you understand – I mean it sounds like you're very analytical and you really track a lot of things. But would you say you actually understand human behavior more so than the statistical side of the game? understand human behavior more so than the statistical side of the game? Well, I think in a lot of ways I have, you know, there's a couple skills that are required to be a good poker player. One is obviously, you know, being analytical, but the other more important one I think is, you know, people skills and the ability to read into human behavior, as you said.

And I think that's my bigger strength, ability to get inside people's head, play psychological warfare, plant seeds that I plan to exploit later, really just kind of break people down and figure out their weaknesses. What's one of your favorite moves or strategy moves you've ever created in a game, maybe even a big pressure game that you will just always remember as one of the greatest moves you've ever done so far, where you really set someone up and then later you just had it perfectly set up and you got exactly the result you wanted. Well, I could list like 100 of those, but they all break down to the same idea, which is there's very few people who do what I do in terms of I do a lot of table talk. I do a lot of talking and really confusing people into doing what I do in terms of, I do a lot of table talk. I do a lot of talking and, um, you

know, truly confusing people into doing what I want. So a lot of times I'll say something to set somebody up for a later situation, you know, where, uh, I talked, there was like one example from the six braces that I just won recently against an incredible player named Phil, Phil Bork, we call him Phil gruesome, where, um where I raised and I was talking a lot and being sloppy and he re-raised. And so later when I had a really, really strong hand, I was talking a lot and I sort of taunted him. And I looked at him, I was like, really, you just never leave me alone, do you? You just like, can't let one go, can you? And I wanted him to do that. I wanted him. And so he did. And it was actually kind of a key part for me at that point. So I definitely use my

mouth. That's definitely a tool that's consistently been something that I go to when all else fails. Amazing. Now, if you couldn't use your words, do you think you'd be as an effective poker player? No, I don't think I'd be as effective. I still think I'd be, you know, obviously a winning player, one of the best. But part of what I think is interesting about poker is that you can create a table image or, you know, about self-awareness. So now I understand how people view me, right? And what they think, and now I can exploit that. So if people think, for example, oh, Daniel, he bluffs all the time. Okay. Now that I know that, well, I'm not going to bluff them. Or conversely, if they think, oh, Daniel, he never bluffs here. Okay. Well, this is the perfect

guy to bluff. So self-awareness is probably the most important attribute to becoming a successful player. Now, how, uh, how much self-awareness did you have for the first, I guess, 15 years until you did the leadership training that I did as well? Well, to be honest, I feel like that's something that's always been a strength of mine. Uh, you know, self-awareness, especially at the poker table. And I've always been somebody who, you know, as you mentioned, has been analytical. Um, but what I got out of doing, uh, what I did was the different one than you, I was in Las Vegas doing choice center. And, um, what I got out of it was like a new level of self-awareness and really sort of like, you can read all you want in books, you know, and

in theory, but it's completely different on when you're not actually just, when you actually experience something, it sticks with you longer. So your experiential learning is like the next frontier. You can read a hundred books or have one experience over a weekend. And that experience sticks with me much stronger than any books did. Yeah. Amazing. So you're always had a lot of self-awareness, but you feel like you have heightened self-awareness now since then? Well, definitely heightened self-awareness and also – Confidence. Yeah, and more specifically, like specifically what I got out of completing Choice Center was I got re-in-touch with my confidence and not realizing there was a connection to this woman who I was absolutely in love with this girl.

And she quote-unquote broke my heart. And I'd gotten over it before I went, but I didn't realize there were still wounds there. absolutely in love with this girl. And, uh, she, you know, she quote unquote broke my heart and, um, I'd gotten over it before I went, but I didn't realize there were still wounds there. And what I didn't realize is the effect on that situation on the rest of my career in, you know, in every, not just my career, but in my life, it hurt my confidence at the poker table. My self-esteem was down. Um, now when other people started talking about, Oh, Negron, no, yeah, he's over the hill. He can't win anymore. I started to believe it. I started to buy into what they had to say. And not only till I really dealt through that through some of the experiential learning that you've done as well did I really realize, like, oh, my God, who knew that there was a connection there?

And once I attacked it after leadership, I went on an absolute tear. I won $3.5 million in tournaments and got back to number one in the world. When was this relationship that you had your heart broken? I'd say it ended in 2011. It was on and off for about three years. July of 2011. lot in common more than I thought so is because right before I went to my leadership training, it was about six to eight months of me kind of getting over a heartbreak as well. And it kind of had me lose my mojo in a lot of areas. I felt like I was getting it back and business was still great and everything, but I just didn't have 100% of the confidence that I had before. And that's a lot that opened up for me as well, is kind of letting go of that and getting through it as opposed to holding on to this resentment or this hurt feeling that I had.

And since then, it's just been like everything's working in unison the way I envisioned it. And it's been a beautiful experience. So it's interesting you had the similar thing that happened. Well, yeah. And to touch on that, I actually listened to the podcast with you and Chris Lee. And we talked a little bit about, you know, survival and, you know, I'm sorry, being a victim and being responsible. And I remember one moment just framing the story of her differently, where I told it the first way I told it was just as I

would, you know, where she did this to me, she did that to me and oh my God, all this. Right. And then, you know, one of the exercises we did, I was asked to sort of frame, you know, frame it a little differently and say, okay, well, what were you responsible for? And then I went, oh my God, what an idiot. When I met, she was with somebody else. She'd already told me she wasn't really to be in a relationship.

She lied to me three times and I went back. She didn't do anything to me. I chose all of it, you know? And it's so empowering because once I realized, you know, that nobody has really the power to make you or break you. It's all based on the choices you make. So it was really like an aha moment for me when I went, huh, she didn't do anything. And I view her differently now than I than I did before as well.

I remember the times you don't resent her anymore. Not even a little bit. Now I look, I think back fondly. Now I look, I think back fondly. I'm actually grateful for the relationship because she opened me up to being more spontaneous, having more fun, doing things I wouldn't have. And I, you know, the other stuff is just not something that I focus on anymore. Wow.

It's so powerful. I love this stuff. So tell me, what have you learned in your, I guess, 20 plus years of playing poker? What is it, 23 years now playing poker since you were 16? Is that what you said? Yeah, I started when I was about 17. So it's been 23 years. 23 years of poker.

And I would say intense poker. You're doing it full time, obviously. Well, what, tell me a few things you've learned about people and, you know, people in general. things you've learned about people and uh you know people in general what you've really learned about human behavior and what type of people there are out there and what you can just pick up on people very easily and quickly and it could be over poker and business over dinner whatever it might be but what is there some things you've just really learned about people maybe behaviors that we all tend to have can you share some light on that well yeah you know and this definitely connects us to the training in that um i've spot you know throughout my career there's certain people that i'll pick on right where i bluff them i attack them i go

after them and those are the people that generally say things like i'm the unluckiest player in the world nothing ever happens well good for me like i they're just completely they live like a victim so for example a poker example if a scary card comes on the river right i'll try to i'll try a big bluff on them because in their mind like of course he caught that card that always happens to me nothing good ever happens to me so i pick on them when you see somebody come to your table conversely where they're confident they have a positive attitude, they seem like they belong, this is a guy with a good table presence, right? And I believe that that's very important.

And it's a testament also to how, like poker's a mirror for how people live their lives. And you see the best and the worst of people, most importantly, when they're losing. You know, when you're winning, it's easy to be happy and ha ha, everything's great. It's when you lose for like a month or two, what happens to that person, to their psyche? Then you see the real truth in terms of like what they're dealing with and who they are. So what do you like when you're losing? Well, I like to pride myself on being somebody who's again, very self-aware. And I would say the biggest, you know, change is like with anything, you start to second guess maybe.

Starting to second guess, and that's, again, an issue of confidence. So I'll analyze myself. I'll look at the hands. I'll discuss it with friends. And I'll be like, am I playing bad or not? I'll always look for feedback from friends. And there's two different types of feedback that I can get in poker. And some comes from my friends who I respect.

And others, if you just read the internet forums, you got, you got 15 year old kids posting on their new ground, who sucks, man, he can't play a leg. Like if I focus on that stuff, that's not very like empowering, but, you know, discussing with friends like Phil Ivey and others like that, you know, that's, they'll, they'll tell me like, no, no, you're playing good. And, um, again, I think at this point, I'm very, very self-aware in terms of knowing the difference between if I'm playing poorly or I'm just not confident. How does someone build confidence, do you think? Well, I mean obviously one of the ways is to do something like Choice Center or the leadership program that you did because the biggest mistake I think a lot of people make is they continue to do the same thing over and over and expect a different result. The definition of insanity, as Einstein said. So I think, you know, building confidence, first and foremost, you want to pick, you want to start out playing in a game you're

comfortable in. Like I wouldn't play against the pros in your, for your first time, you know, sit in a game where you feel like you are one of the better players and, you know, or conversely, if you were playing at a certain level and you're not doing as well, go down a little bit and rebuild confidence. If your confidence has been shattered, uh, it'd be similar to like a baseball pitcher, you know, where he's just not doing well in the majors, go down to the minors for a couple of weeks, get your confidence back, come on back. And then, uh, with, with, you know, recharged, renewed look on, on the situation. How do you look at failure?

Well, I look at failure as an awesome opportunity. I really do. And as I said, I mean, in my life, before I became successful, I had to have been broke at least 20 times. And each one of those 20 times was a learning experience. Sometimes I had to learn the same thing over a couple of times. But the point where it really forced me to dig deep, see what was underneath, like when my back was against the wall. And I found that I have that ability when my back's against the wall to really thrive under pressure. And that's one of the things that's made me a good tournament player because the stress levels when you're at the end are at their highest,

but it's when your focus needs to be at its peak. So how do you prepare for a big tournament or a big game mentally and physically? What do you do to get ready? Well, I mean, I'm a big proponent of sleep. I mean, when you play poker, sometimes we're playing 12 to 15 hour sessions. Um, you know, if your mind's not, if you're not rested, you're just not going to be at your peak. So eight hours of sleep. I eat really well. I'm actually a vegan. So I, you know, I try to eat clean, not processed foods. When I'm on the road, it's a bit more of a struggle.

Aside from that, you know, I'm physically active. I work out four times a week. But in terms of actually preparation for the poker tournament, I've played so many years now. There's no specific training I need to do for the poker tournament outside of just making sure that my mind's at peace. I'm rested. I don't drink alcohol, no caffeine, none of that stuff before a tournament. So it sounds like you really take your body and your mind, you treat it like you're a professional athlete. And it sounds like where you're getting a you know, a lot of sleep here.

I mean, vegan, that's pretty like hardcore and, uh, and working out what type of workouts do you do? Well, I work out with a trainer four days a week. Uh, you know, actually we do like we lift and then I, you know, I do some, you know, cardio stuff and yoga on the side when I'm not working out with her. Um, November has been no booze, no bread month for me. So I'm going hardcore. It's amazing. And do you feel like the sleep, the eating and the physical working out plays a big part of your success and being able to stay on point throughout these tournaments? Yeah. Well, I think so. And again, this came from a learning lesson in my early twenties when I was just like everybody else. You know, this came from a learning lesson in my early 20s when, you know, I was just

like everybody else. You know, the night before a tournament, we'd go out, we'd have dinner, we'd have wine, and we'd have drinks later. It'd be four o'clock in the morning and you're still not asleep. And now you're like hungover for the first day. And I did that for, you know, a good solid year or two. And then I thought, you know, what am I doing here? Is this a job or not?

You know, and one of the dangers, one job or not? And one of the dangers, one of the great things and one of the dangers about being a poker player is you are your own boss. So you're not accountable to anybody but yourself. So if you're not looking after your best interests financially, mentally, spiritually, whatever, then who is? So I took it upon myself, say, okay, well, I'm going gonna set some rules here no alcohol the night before a tournament period and that was like one of the biggest ones you know it's important yeah and then you also playing golf on the side just like different recreation activities oh totally golf is i think golf is like a perfect uh you know perfect actually addition to a poker

player's lifestyle which poker players are often out late inside a casino. Golf, you're outside, you're in the sun, you're still competing, and you're still stimulating your mind. And gambling happens there too. So yeah, I love golf. Gambling at golf is probably my most fun form of gambling. Do you usually win? I started out doing very poorly. There were millions of dollars that went from my hands to other

people's. And then I got a personal caddy slash coach named Christian who, you know, he helped me turn things around. So I got it all back plus a little bit of gravy. What would you say is your second favorite sport to play? Besides, I guess, besides poker and golf, what do you play next? You like, are you a big chess guy? guy no you think that's a sport too well i mean a game whatever you want to call it well i'm canadian so you know i played street hockey growing up i also played soccer played basketball i played it all but uh yeah actually here in vegas um often on thursday nights we play indoor soccer with a group of players yeah wow this is awesome i it. Who would have known this whole underground community of sports playing with all the poker guys.

That's awesome. So what's your big dream? What's your big vision? You've, you've done it all. It sounds like you've been number one in the world twice. You've won millions. You're, you know, six bracelets. Is that what you said?

Yeah. Bracelets. Like what's the dream? What's the vision next? You're 30 and you're late 30s. You've got- You've got tons of time and tons of life left, hopefully. And what's the vision? Well, that's a good question. Well, the first one that's on my mind right now is when I'm 40,

I have this cutout because I believe in visualization. I have this cutout. It's of David Beckham, ripped to shreds. And so I've got that that I'm gonna do a side by side when I'm 40, because I'd like to be in the best shape of my life when I'm 40. So I'm well on my way there. But more importantly, when I before I went to Choice Center, I, you know, I had people have people work for me, you know, I have assistants, I have my golf guy, I have my manager. And then I realized that for 10 years, I isolated myself from the rest of the world in a lot of ways. And I didn't have, you know, that network. I pushed people away, you know, on a regular basis. And, you know, people always, I felt like they wanted something from me, whether it was money or whether it was association. So I really got disconnected. And one of the things I realized is that I was missing love in my life. And not just talking about romantic love, although that is the vision right now. I'm definitely looking to start a family of my own, find the right woman, and have a couple little Negronus running around. Nice. Now, when you mean you're missing out on love,

besides the romantic side of things, you mean just connecting with people in the world in general? Well, yeah, because I'd shut myself off. I guess for a period when poker was getting more popular, I chose to – I just found that I was – all the relationships I had were like five minutes. Like, hey, how are you doing? Nice to meet you, da-da-da. But there was nothing – there was no depth there.

And then I ended up – one of my closest friends now is the person i did leadership with laura and uh i actually just traveled with her for a month in europe and you know i got to know her and the people in my group at a much deeper level and the best part of it was laura the first six weeks i knew her she didn't know my name and she didn't know who I was at all. So yeah, it was really great because it's, it's like, I felt like I got to learn. I got to meet people, um, from the inside out and get to know them from the inside out. Yeah. You know, where after a while I'm like, do you even like scary movies? What kind of food do you like? I asked all those questions after I already know, you know, part of her. So yeah, interesting way to get to know

people. That's true. I mean, I spent three months with people, I still don't know what they do for a living. But I got to know who they were as an individual and just like, the loving, beautiful, magnetic being that they were. And I never had to talk about the other stuff, the surface stuff of like, where do you live? Where do you work? you work and you know those things they just don't seem as important anymore well yeah i know again it's it's a it's actually opened my eyes too to just in terms of like in meeting people um understanding that you know that that stuff is obviously when you meet somebody in a social setting you're going to stay on the surface but you really don't know somebody until you really know them from the inside you know and what really makes them tick and their story and when they're vulnerable and you're vulnerable with them,

that's when connection is created. Otherwise, it's, you know, it's not possible for that to be present unless one, both of you are vulnerable with each other. Let's talk about vulnerability. Do you feel like you've ever really been vulnerable until you went through this experience? Yeah, no, I'd say that, you know, I've been an open book for most of my life, but seeing the power and understanding the power of vulnerability and also how we all as humans not only just crave it, but we need it. It's what makes us happy. It's what connects us to each other and realizing that it's okay. You know, I don't have to be strong and tough and, and right all the time. I can be, um, open and I can be sad and I can, you know,

talk about things that, you know, I'd like that I don't have in my life or that I'd want things like that. And, and for, for it to be okay and not to be feared, not to fear being judged. Cause the truth is when people are vulnerable, I mean, people don't usually get angry with them or judge them. They have empathy and they feel more connected because they think, Oh my God, I've felt that same thing in my life a few times. So not until you share and be vulnerable can you really connect with people, I think. So what are some things that you've learned on the poker table that allow you to connect with people on an intimate, vulnerable, connected level?

What are some things that you can share with the audience of how they can connect with a random stranger or someone in the business workspace or at the office? What are some things people can do to just really connect so that person trusts you on the other end? Even though I know you're not really connecting to build trust on the poker table, but what are some things you've learned about that? Well, I mean, in poker, obviously at the table, I'm one of the few guys who does, I actually, like I said, I do a lot of talking and table talk and really it comes down to getting to know people. And the first, you know, the first step is just actually asking them questions about

their life. And, you know, very few people hate the idea of talking about themselves. Most people are comfortable with that. So, you know, you want to like the idea of being a good friend is really somebody who's being a good listener, not somebody who's, you know, telling you all about themselves. So really just showing an interest and actually caring about what people say and making eye contact and, you know, asking follow up. So ask about family, ask about people's goals and dreams. And you find that they just people want to open up.

They want to talk. So that's something I definitely learned as a byproduct of it originally being a strategy because I wanted to know more about these people so I can exploit weaknesses, right? Right. Oh, you're a lawyer? Okay. I know not to trust you. Stuff like that. That's funny. So first is being a good listener and really caring and following up with the people.

What are some other things you've learned about really building a deep connection? Well, I mean that it takes two to tango in that regard. It's not as simple as, okay, so you're asking questions to this person. You're getting to know them and then you're just going to be like a wall. You have to be willing to go that extra mile too and share with them and let them know that you're willing to be vulnerable with them. So if you hear something that they say that relates to you, you can respond with like, I went through the same thing as you did earlier when we talked about the girl. I know I'm not the only one. I'm sure there's lots of us out there to experience that.

What's your biggest fear, Daniel? It seems like you're always so happy and got it all together and you're always in the top and making tons of money. And what really kind of scares you? I'm not afraid of much. should or could to make a difference with the people around me and my community and like all these ideas that I have in my head to help change the world, uh, you know, fighting, uh, complacency or, you know, getting too like inwardly focused and getting wrapped up in my own life where I cease to, you know, have my eye on the bigger picture. So my biggest fear, I guess, would be not living up to my full responsibility in terms of the high lofty goals I set.

What are some of those goals besides the family and the love, the connection? What are some of those other goals? Well, much like you, obviously, you've done the training as well. For me, it was so impactful for me that I'd sent my people to work for me, my family, my friends. And, um, it's one of those things. I just feel, I, I really, I believe the world would be a better place if everybody went through training, you know, like this or similar or something, you know, so, you know, inspiring people to want to make a difference and inspiring people to realize that like, it doesn't have to be this way. You have a choice. Like you always have one, you know, I mean, there's always something you can do differently than you are now.

And I get, listen, I get that people have brutal circumstances. And, um, you know, I always use an analogy where, you know, you take two mothers, right. That both lost a son to a drunk driver. Right. And that's not their fault. And they have every right to be in pain about that, but how they react to that, you know, one mother becomes just despondent, is not there for the rest of her family and just detached. The other mother starts mothers against drunk driving and makes a difference in the world, you know? So I'm a big believer in, you know, stuff like those things are not your fault but how you respond to them in the future like a year down the road that's on you that's that's your responsibility

i believe that wholeheartedly and again i get circumstances but i i there's so many people that you know choose differently and i i just want more people to be open to that yeah and so many people hold on to those circumstances and those conversations and stories and allow to control them for the rest of their lives so they never actually take action or go after their dreams or their goals. They just allow the story to control them. And like you said, there's tons of people who have had horrible stories and circumstances that they've overcome and they choose to think differently. They choose to live differently. And I think it's amazing that it's part of your vision that you they choose to think differently. They choose to live differently. And I think it's amazing that it's part of your vision that you want everyone to experience that because it sucks watching people, especially that you care about, who are always holding

themselves back based on stories and circumstances and past experiences as opposed to breaking through it and moving forward and being responsible. Yeah, no, definitely. It's definitely, it's addicting. Being a victim is addicting and it's just an easy being responsible. Yeah, no, definitely. It's, it's definitely, it's addicting. Being a victim is addicting and it's just an easy way out. It's a cop out to, you know, to blame every, everything else, every, all your situation, your story, whatever else may be, but like, it's just a much easier way to live, but it's not empowering and it's not fulfilling.

And I, it's just such a beautiful thing when that light bulb turns in somebody's head and they go, you know what? I get it like myself, you know what? I get it. Like myself, you know, in the whole story with the girl that I was in love with. And woe is me. Look what she did to me. Buddy, you chose all that. You could have left when the red flags were like waving in your face like 100 miles an hour.

Red flag, red flag. So now I look at it and I laugh at myself. And I would never put myself in those shoes again. I feel the same way. I mean, in the first three months, I saw so many red flags and I was like, but I'm still going to go after it and I'm still in love and this and that. And then I just put myself through misery, but it's all good. And it was a great experience. I definitely see where you're coming from. What I want to know is what has given you the drive for the last 23 years? What was it growing up?

Was there an experience? Was there a constant conversation? Was it your parents? Was there someone bullied you and said you're never going to do something in the world? What gave you the drive and the determination to be so dedicated for the last 23 years of wanting to be the best in the world in poker well you know here on here i can only speculate and you know obviously one thing i believe is that i've always just sort of had determination and ability to like you know i thought i was born with a decent head on my shoulders if you will having said that you know

i could point to the fact that i was the shortest kid in my school until the seventh grade. My brother's like, you know, 6'3", 220, big, big guy. My dad was like a big manly guy, was electrician. And I was like the youngest. And my mom babied me and I was very spoiled. Like my mom was the best. She would make me, you know, she would always make sure that I had lunch. And when I was a kid, I resented it, but I really learned later to appreciate it. So I guess always the feeling that maybe I was smaller than other people, you know, that Napoleon complex, if you will, that I'd have to, you know, I didn't like, I don't know where it came from, but I never liked, I never responded well to anybody being condescending to me. And that's still true. Hmm. You're the youngest of two. I never responded well to anybody being condescending to me. And that's still true.

You're the youngest of two. Yeah. My mother had 11 kids, but nine miscarriages. So, oh my gosh. Yeah. So when she had me, I mean,

she smothered me with love, like so happy to just have me. And I let that, you know, I remember being 31 years old and, uh, she made me a soup and I was putting the spoon to my mouth and she started blowing on it.

And I was like, mommy, listen, I'm 31 years old. Stop. You can't do blowing on it. And I was like, mommy, listen, I'm 31 years old. You've got to stop. You can't do that no more. But she's like, I can't help it. You're always going to be my baby.

That's amazing. Yeah, I'm the youngest as well. But I'm the biggest of the family. So I'm like the big jock. And luckily I got those genes, I guess. But I still feel like the runt sometimes. And that was kind of my motivation to be the best at everything that I did. So let's talk about, go back into failure. I want to know about when you're just having a bad day.

And you're at the poker table and just nothing's falling for you. And you can't table talk your way through anything. You're not getting the cards you need. And you're just losing over and over and you feel pathetic. What do you tell yourself and how do you feel in those situations? I guess first, how do you feel when that's happening? Because I'm sure it's happened many times over 23 years. And then what do you tell yourself to just snap out of it and continue forward as opposed to having it control you in a negative way?

Well, that's actually for one, I definitely don't ever feel pathetic. That's for sure. Right. You know, now that I've been doing it so long, um, I've learned to focus on what's in my control. So I beat myself up when it's me that made the mistake, but you know, if it was bad luck, like I had a pair of aces and the guy had a pair of tens and he caught a 10 that's, you caught a 10. That wasn't in my control. So I don't – that's no big deal. I'm able to shift and go, okay, you know what? You're still doing the right thing.

If I make a mistake where I played a hand and I should have known better, those are a little more difficult to deal with. So what I do is – actually, what I do now, and again, I learned this through Choice Center training, was I stop, okay, and I look at the situation and go, okay, you know what? Definitely screwed up here. And why did I screw up? Because I wasn't as focused. And I'm committed now to making sure that I'm focused from here on out. We're going to put that behind me. And then I just shift my mind. Because if you don't, if you let that linger, you're not going to be present to what you're doing in the moment, which is the most important thing at a poker table. You got to be present.

So if 15 minutes later, I'm still thinking about the mistake I made on that hand, well, I've beat myself even worse. And you're going to make mistakes. It's how you respond to them. Again, difference between responsible and victim. It's how you respond to those mistakes or bad beats that you take in a poker tournament. I love it. I appreciate you sharing all this.

And I really want the listeners to be able to take this information and apply it to whatever they're doing in their business or life. So these are all principles that you can apply in every other situation in life. And I appreciate you being open about this. What about getting in the zone?

Because you're sitting there at the table for hours and hours. How do you stay in the zone? Or is it kind of going in and out when you know you need to get into the zone and then take a break? Because I feel like that'd be really challenging to be in the zone for 10 hours. Well, definitely. That's one thing I've learned over the years. These poker tournaments that we play often take six days and you're playing about 12 hours each day. So you're looking, you know, 70 hours of being at the table, something like that. So what I realized is, okay, you know, I'm not going to be able to maintain hyper focus that entire time, right?

So I choose the first couple days to just kind of like take it easy, soak it in, you know, get to know the people at my table. take it easy, soak it in, you know, get to know the people at my table. Um, and then when we get down to about 25, 30 players, I'm able to just elevate to this new level of focus where I just sense things. I feel things. If somebody licks their lip, you know, 20 meters to my left, I notice it and I know what it means. Um, if somebody swallows, I can see it. It's just because I can serve my energy for the points where I feel like it's most necessary to be focused. And really about pacing yourself, I think, because we are human. And to focus at that level for an entire tournament I don't think is realistic. And your funeral, what do you want people to say about you? What do you want people to say about you? Hmm.

Well, I don't want to ever die, but I guess I'm going to. So let's go with, well, what I'd like, I guess what I'd want to say is, I wanted to say is that, that I was outspoken and stood for what I believed was right, even if it meant standing alone, that I always looked to be inspirational and use the platform I was given to make a difference for other people. Love it. And what is your definition of greatness? My definition of greatness. I actually retweeted Chris's. So it's become my new go-to. But I, you know, in a nutshell, along the same lines as Chris is, you know, is greatness is achieving a life that you've had in your mind and a vision you've seen for yourself and actually just living it. So powerful. I love it. Where can we, where can we connect with you or follow you online? What's the best place? Well, the best way places, uh, I'm at real kid poker on Twitter,

real kid poker on Twitter. And was there a main website that you want to direct anyone to, to check out your stuff? Well, my, my homepage that I have is just a personal page. It's full contact poker.com. And,. And yeah, so I'm there every once in a while, but Twitter is basically the best way. Daniel, I appreciate it. And I love our conversation. And thank you so much for sharing openly. It was a pleasure, my man. And I love what you're doing. I think it's fantastic. And I was really hoping that I'd have the opportunity to be on your show because I listened to the last podcast and I think you're making a difference with this kind of stuff.

Well, thank you. Maybe we can do some powerful leadership stuff in the future someday. Sounds like a plan. I appreciate it, man. Thanks so much. You got it, buddy. And there you have it, guys. Thanks so much for tuning in. And big thank you to Daniel for just opening up and sharing his wisdom and his insights and his years and years of lessons and examples that we can all apply in our business and our life and our relationships.

And what an honor, what a privilege it was for me to connect with Daniel. And I'm just so excited to be able to share this type of information with you. Again, this is the type of information that I was always looking for when I was 10, 15, 20 years old, just trying to figure out life in general, trying to figure out what it was going to take for me to get to the next level in sports, what it was going to take for me to get a scholarship in college, what it was going to take to make it to the professional football league, and what it was going to take to make my first million. I was always looking for this type of information to learn from successful people on all walks

of life. And I'm just so blessed and privileged to be able to share this with you. And I hope that each week that this kind of just brings you some additional inspiration and some insights for you to apply to your own business, your own sports, your life, your art, your relationships, whatever it is you're trying to create something magical in your life. I hope this gives you that spark of inspiration. And if you guys enjoyed this episode, please, I would love it if you shared it over on Facebook with your friends or over on Twitter. And make sure to tag Daniel as well.

We've got it all over on the show notes with his Twitter and Facebook page. So head on over to lewishouse.com and you'll see Daniel's information over there and all the show notes about this episode. There'll probably be some videos and images of Daniel up there as well. And that's over at lewishouse.com and schoolofgreatness.com. And also wherever you're listening to this in the world, go ahead and tag yourself. Post a picture and tag at lewishouse and Daniel's Instagram as well over on Instagram. We'd love to just kind of see where you guys are in the world, where you're listening,

where you're being inspired at with this interview with Daniel. And it'd be kind of cool to just check it out. So with that, guys, you know what time it is. It's time to go out there, play big today and do something great. You can't run away. Rise. Rise. Rise