The School of Greatness - How To Find Purpose In What You Do, Overcome Insecurities & Destroy Fear In 2022 EP 1210

Episode Date: January 3, 2022

As we’re coming into the new year, it’s an opportunity to reinvent yourself. It’s a time to take inventory of what parts of your life you love and the other parts that you want to improve. A big part of achieving greatness in your life is to find purpose and meaning in what you’re doing and learn how to show up as your best self each and every day. In this episode we discuss how to find purpose and meaning in your life with Jay Shetty, how to overcome insecurities and build confidence with Priyanka Chopra, where suffering comes from and how you can maximize your potential in life with Sadhguru, how to not let fear get in the way of your purpose with Lisa Nichols and so much more!For more go to: www.lewishowes.com/1210Jay Shetty's episode: www.lewishowes.com/953Lisa Nichols' episode: www.lewishowes.com/979Sadhguru's episode: www.lewishowes.com/965Priyanka Chopra's episode: www.lewishowes.com/1067  

This is episode number 1,210, all about finding and pursuing your purpose. Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. My friend, welcome back. As we're coming into the new year, it's an opportunity to reinvent yourself.

It's a time where you can take inventory of what parts of your life you love and the other parts that you want to improve upon as you set new goals. And a big part of achieving greatness in your life is to find purpose and meaning and a really meaningful purpose that lights you up, that gets you excited, that makes you want to jump out of bed in what you're doing and how you learn and how you show up as your best self each day and every moment that you possibly can. It's a constant journey, but it's always worth prioritizing and pursuing. So in this episode, we discuss how to find purpose and meeting in your life with my dear friend Jay Shetty.

How to not let fear get in the way of your purpose with Lisa Nichols. Where suffering comes from and how you can maximize your potential in life with Sadhguru, how to overcome insecurities and build confidence with Priyanka Chopra, and so much more. If you're inspired by this message, please share this with a few friends that you can think would be inspired by this as well. It's all about spreading the message of greatness to more people. So if you're enjoying this, just copy and paste the link

wherever you're listening to this podcast, or you can go right to lewishouse.com slash 1210 and share that link out. And I want to give a big thanks to the fan of the week. This is from Holdi, who said, look forward to listening every week. It's the best content on living up to your optimal potential and so uplifting. Totally fuels my curiosity about things I may have never considered and also things that really matter to me. So big thank you and a shout out to Hody for leaving a review over on Apple Podcasts and being our fan of the week. Okay, in just a moment, it's time to learn how to find purpose and meaning in your life.

It's time to learn how to find purpose and meaning in your life. 2022 is going to be a big year for a lot of businesses, but some industries are projected to grow even more this year, like home improvement. I see you DIYers out there on TikTok, the fitness industry, whether it be apps or studios or the pet service industry with all the furry friends adopted during COVID. And if you work for or own your own business in one of these growing industries or a wide range of other industries, you probably need to hire ASAP.

There's only one place to go, ZipRecruiter. And right now you can try it for free at ZipRecruiter.com slash greatness. ZipRecruiter uses powerful technology to find and match the right candidates up with your job. Then it proactively presents these candidates to you. And ZipRecruiter's technology is so effective that 4 out of 5 employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. And now you can try ZipRecruiter for free at this exclusive web address. ZipRecruiter.com slash greatness. That's ZipRecruiter.com slash G-R-E-A-T-N-E-S-S.

ZipRecruiter, the smartest way to hire. In this first section, number one New York Times bestselling author and former monk, Jay Shetty, shares how to find purpose and meaning in what you do, how to go from what he calls a monkey mind to a monk mind, and how to live more abundantly. I think it was Albert Einstein who said it best that not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted. And I love that because it removes this belief

that things are finite and limited, and they're not. If you wanna be happy and successful, no matter that there are 700,000 podcasts, if that is your dharma, if that's your calling, if that's your purpose, you can do that. There's no cap on how many successful soccer players that can exist at the same time. Or how many books are out in the world.

There's no cap. There's no one stopping you. And that's the mindset that we're educated for that scarcity and greed. And what's the difference between the monkey mind and the monk mind? Yeah, I'm glad you brought that up. So the monkey mind is what we experience

on a day-to-day basis. The monkey mind is restless. The monkey mind is jumping from branch to branch. The monkey mind's trying to find a bigger banana. The monkey mind is restless. The monkey mind is jumping from branch to branch. The monkey mind's trying to find a bigger banana. The monkey mind is constantly just like feeling flustered, dissatisfied, scarce, and overthinking everything. The monk mind is the exact opposite. The monk mind is calm and composed.

The monk mind knows to be focused and aware. The monk mind knows. So everything in this book and everything that we're talking about is the transformation from the monkey mind that we experience to the monk mind. The monkey mind is almost the enemy to the monk mind. It's the opposite. Yes. And how does someone who is living in a sense of scarcity, because there are people living in scarcity where they're unable to pay their bills they're unable to provide food for their kids they're single moms they're they're stressed they're stressed they're overwhelmed it's hard to get into a sense of abundance when you're in

scarcity and stress so how does someone find purpose in chaos when they can't even get out of the thinking because they're just trying to survive? Yeah. So beautiful question. My biggest answer is, first of all, I empathize with anyone who's been in that situation having, I can't ever say I've been in that situation in the same way, but I've experienced similar things. You've seen a feeling in your life. Yeah. In my own way. And I've seen my mom go through stuff like that. I know that my mom worked really hard to raise me and my sister while working you know while running around and i've i've seen my mom be that incredible powerhouse of a person and the the main thing i would say is what you can do right now is find meaning in what you do make what you do meaningful passionate and purposeful you don't need to suddenly look to become an

entrepreneur or start a side hustle or find some more time find meaning and the way you find meaning as you genuinely stop press pause for a second and go what am i living for like what am i living for right now and if you're living for your child and if you're living to provide and put food on the table that is a beautiful thing that we should celebrate more. And sometimes it takes us a moment to stop and celebrate that. And so I would say find meaning because you can't always find happiness. You can't always find positivity, but you can always find meaning in that position. So I'll give an example.

Like I lost someone really important to me, a mentor, a few days back. I can't be positive about that. You can't be happy about that. You're sad. Yeah. It's hurtful. You feel sad, you feel lost, but guess what, I can find meaning in it. Because I can make a list of every lesson he taught me

and make a plan to try and live every one of those lessons. Wow, that's beautiful. And so if you're in a really tough situation right now, don't look for positivity. Don't look for happiness. Look for meaning. That's a good one. Not trying to get yourself out of pain too quickly or discomfort or frustration,

which I've been a guilt of being like, I'll just be positive or whatever to people. But I think it's like, have your experience, live your experience, and find meaning as quickly as possible. And create a commitment to how you want to use that meaning moving forward. Love that. Okay, I may not be great tomorrow, maybe not next week, next month, but I'm going to use this meaning to serve other people, to continue to do what I love, continue to be great to my friends, my family in the best way possible.

And when you start doing those small things with love and kindness, so much more opens up. It's like when you can be trusted with the small things and the small moments, you get trusted with more and more and more. And so like, it helps to just, in that moment, and it's in those painful moments that you realize how powerful you are.

We all know that, like you really recognize it. And what you said was beautiful about not rushing through the pain because, and you know, this example's probably been shared before, but if you have a wound and you've cut yourself it's like you can't rush the healing you can't rush it if you broke your arm I mean and you've been through so many bodily injuries you can't rush the process it's gonna take six weeks minimum to heal broken oh yeah and you've got to sit through that it's

there's no injections you can take there's no videos you can watch there's nothing you can listen to. But our challenge is we try and rush through the pain rather than reflect through the pain. We try to rush the healing process too. Try to rush the healing and you can't rush healing. Healing is meant to be slow because it buys you time. It buys you reflection. It gives you so much space.

To slow down. To slow down. And that's what your body is calling out for. And this is our emergency. How many times have you heard it where you slow down, you slow down. And that's what your body's calling out for. And this is our emergency, like, how many times have you heard it, where you slow down, you slow down, and that's when you fall ill? Because guess what, your body has been trying

to tell you to slow down. When you feel pain, so I write about it and think like a monk, pain makes you pay attention. That's what pain's for. Pain's not- Notice this. Notice this. Look at me. Notice me. Look at me.

It's like a crying baby craving for attention. Look at me. Notice me, look at me. It's like a crying baby craving for attention. When a baby's crying, you don't just go, ah, it's crying. You don't just go, oh yeah, we'll just put it in another room and forget about it, right? Like you go to it and you find its needs. Whereas with our pain, when something's painful, we're just like, oh yeah, I'll just forget about it.

I'll escape from it, I'll do something else. You have to go into that pain. I'll numb the pain. I'll numb the pain. That's it. With alcohol or whatever. Yeah, 100%, that's usually our response is, what can I do to numb this? go into that pain. Unnumb the pain. Unnumb the pain. That's it. With alcohol or whatever. 100%. That's usually our response is, what can I do to numb this? Work more,

have sex more, drink more, drugs more, whatever it is. Rather than, let me actually become alert. And guess what? The pain just gets higher and higher and higher and higher because unfortunately, until it really hurts, we don't stop. Or you need more and more to numb it with. So true. And so you go down to extremes of life, right? So true. Now, what's been the most painful thing you've had to experience since, because I know leaving the monkhood was painful for you because this was a mission of yours

that you wanted to have for your whole life. And I think you were there for three and a half years. So what's been the most painful thing, I guess, in the last six or seven years since that time that you've had to reflect back on, take notice of, pay attention to, and reevaluate? That's a great question. I think for me it was in 2016, I moved out to New York.

So just let me paint a picture of 2016. I moved three jobs, I got married, I moved country, and I just started a whole new life. I got married, I moved country, and I just started a whole new life. Like my life just transformed. So we went through all of that with my wife in one year. And by the way, all of that was surprises. The job change was surprises.

The country change was a surprise. The marriage was not a surprise, we planned that. But apart from everything else, everything was a surprise. Now I said I like surprises so I can roll with it but my point is that's a lot of transition so much transition and i felt the burden of being in a new city where we had no family we had no friends and my wife who loves being around her family and no one understands just how close she is to them i felt this burden on me that i had taken away her time with her family and now she was alone so i was going out to work and she'd be crying at home and i was

thinking she's got no friends she's got no support and i know you can relate to this with moving and relationships and so much going on and so it's like i'm dealing with that and guess what six months later i have to leave and move on and work on a new career to build everything myself and then I'm four months away from being broke and so on top of all of this I've now got four months away from being broke I've got enough money money saved for four months to pay for rent and groceries and that's it in New York City and that's it and guess what even on top of that I've got 30 days before my visa runs out I I'm kicked out of the country.

So I can't even live here anymore. So not only have I just got married, moved job three times, changed career again, had to move into a apartment, four months of being broke, and I might get kicked out in 30 days, and my renewal for my visa costs $15,000. So that's going to eat into those four months. I have probably never been under that much emotional, physical, and mental pressure in my life. Like genuinely, I felt it. And I felt my body change. My breath was more stressed. I would be breathing faster, shorter breaths, not deep breaths, heart beating faster, not working out.

You get into lazy habits. You start craving junk food. I'm living in a 500 square foot apartment with my wife which is which is tiny like everything's in that space and guess what we both work from home so i'm now sitting at a desk hunched over trying to figure stuff out she's trying to cook in the same room like i'm trying to just just trying to figure out what to do and i remember the next morning sending like a hundred emails to people and just being like this is who i am this is what I can do how can we serve and that was the same year that I ended up meeting you later in that year and the beginning three months of that journey was so stressful like they were so stressful because I was like what if I have to move back to London what am I going to say to her parents I

mean I just took their daughter away like uh just Like, I've lived in New York City for six months and my life's falling apart. Like, you know, so much. And I've got all these views, but there's nothing happening here. But you also, I mean, at this time, you're also growing so much. How are you able to create and reach this impact with your videos? That's growing while you're under so much stress and uncertainty. And I stopped a bit at that time. Like things slowed down hard.

Like things slowed down. I remember that. I wasn't creating as much as I was because I don't enjoy creating from stress or pressure. And I don't think you can really create something from stress and pressure. So we really slowed down at that time. And when I was creating, I was creating from a place of recognizing that I could share what I had learned and what I had grown in so far so anything I was sharing was like this is what I've learned so far so that was the biggest pain that I've been

through in the last seven years for sure and all I can say is that I remember coming home to my wife knowing that this was gonna be the truth and I came and I said to I said I guarantee you this is gonna be the best thing that ever happened to us what the pain the pain I said that to the night I came home and I said to her, I said to her, I guarantee you, this is going to be the best thing that ever happened to us. What? The pain? The pain. I said that to her the night I came home and she gave up. I literally came home, I looked her in the eyes and go, this is the scenario. And I just want you to know that I guarantee you, this is the best thing that's ever going to happen to us. And I said to her, and this is a monk statement that we used to repeat. I said to her, I'm just not going to judge the moment. Don't judge the moment. Because what we do is we try to label moments as good or bad.

And when you label a moment as bad, it now does not have the opportunity to become good. I'll give an example. If I go, I don't like this book. This book's bad, right? And I love this book. But if I say that, guess what? I will never pick it up and recognize the value that's inside of it

because you've labeled it. And we label stuff, like we label, oh, that restaurant's bad. But when you label a moment. That person's bad. That person's bad, now you can't learn from that person. Oh, great one, that's a really good one. As soon as you start labeling people

or anything as good or bad, you limit it. You stop it from being something else. And here's the truth, every moment can evolve into being anything if you give it the opportunity to. Right. But as soon as you say it's got no value anymore, you lose it. And so for me, I had to say to myself,

don't judge the moment. And I'd keep repeating that to myself. Don't judge where you're at. Don't judge this. What's happening. Yeah, don't judge it as negative. Don't just start saying it's negative. Because guess what?

We've all been in positions where a gift turned into a curse and a curse turned into a gift. That's true. Where our dreams came true and it ended up not being what we wanted. Exactly. And it fell apart and it led us into our dreams.

Totally, why is it that so many people that win the lottery go broke? Gifts can turn into curses too. But because we label them as the best moment in our life or the worst moment in our life. Whereas when you approach things to neutrality and just what you have on the table you can be like okay what am i going to do next that's why the greatest quarterbacks are neutral energy they'll get a little excited they'll get a little fist pump in there every every now and then but they're not hyped every play and they're not negative every play they

have this calm they see the field there you drop a pass and it's like a little bit, let's go. But it's very neutral. Even when you score a touchdown, unless it's maybe the Super Bowl or a big championship at the end of a game, in the middle of the game, you wanna keep it pretty like even keel paced so you can prepare for the best or the worst.

That's great, yeah. But you're always up and down. It's like your energy levels will go up and down and you'll be exhausted. You need to have energy in life. Totally life totally if everything is tied around a story of this is bad. This is wrong I'm in a bad place. I'm messing up I'm going broke that energy that you're pull you away from service exactly or creation or creativity of how do I get out of? This place so I think it's really I love that and I used have a coach, and I think a lot of coaches use this,

or at least he used to say to us, he would be like, if you lose, cry for a day. And if you celebrate, if you win, celebrate for a day. Yeah, that's it. And then move on the next day, get back to training. Don't let it run. Don't live in the past too much.

Don't live in the past. And what we do is when we lose, we cry for a month. And when we win, we just move on. Which means that our negative experiences hold us back and weigh us down more than our positive experiences. So we're actually allowing, because we don't immerse ourselves in winning and growth,

we only submerge ourselves in negative experiences. We need to celebrate also. We try to celebrate. I've been, you know, that's been part of my life as well, is like moving on too quick. And now we try to like, let's enjoy, let's go to lunch or dinner and really like appreciate this moment and celebrate this moment.

Even have a dinner with some friends and family. Otherwise, why are we working so hard for? A hundred percent. And we almost feel like we can't do that because that makes us complacent. Right. But that's my point. It's never good enough.

Exactly. But if you win, celebrate for a day. If you lose, cry for a day, move on. Simple. And you've learned so many lessons over your years as a monk. You learned a ton of lessons moving to, you know, getting married, moving into a new country, building companies, launching products and books. And you've had ups and downs.

What's been the biggest lesson in the last 12 months for you? Because you've learned, you've created so much in the last 12 months. You've done so many things. What's been the biggest lesson for you in your life? Oh, that's a big question. I think I'd have to say that it's a, and I was saying it to a friend on the phone this morning when I was on the way to you. And I was just, I was just sharing it with him because he was having a moment in recognizing this. There's a wonderful verse in the Manusmriti, which I talk about in Think Like a Monk. It's a monk book. And in the verse, it says, when you protect your purpose, your purpose protects you. Now, I want to unpack that. What I mean by that is your purpose is like a rare jewel and a rare gemstone and

imagine you were walking around with the most expensive diamond or jewel in the world how would you protect it you want to just like you want to just wave it out yeah yeah you want to wear it on your chest like this like a baby holding it yeah putting a pillow around a blanket you do I yeah protect it you protect it and so'd protect it. And so your purpose is like that. And guess what? People are going to tell you every day that that jewel is not worth anything.

They're going to tell you that that jewel is actually valueless. It doesn't have any impact on your life. They're going to try and take away that value. They're going to tell you that there's another jewel out there that you need to have more value. And what ends up happening is you don't, I love the word, look at the wording, protect your purpose. You have to protect it. So what happens is your success grows, you get more opportunities, more ideas, more things coming your way, temptations, but they can all take you away from your purpose. Distractions. And to me, I'm repeating this for myself because I'm like, I just wanna stick

to what I was born to do, and I'm so grateful that I get to do it, I'm so happy I get to do it, and I wanna keep protecting it. I don't wanna get lost in the waves. You know, you don't wanna just get chucked in the waves of the ocean and just get lost and just not know where you're going.

So for me, when you protect your purpose, your purpose protects you. So that's been your biggest lesson? That's my biggest lesson. Why? Do you feel like your purpose has been maybe distracted in some ways? I don't think it has, but I'm saying it so it doesn't.

You're reminding yourself. Yeah, I'm reminding myself. I'm preaching to myself right now. Especially being in Hollywood and the temptation of all these opportunities out here. Totally. And I think for me, it's a bigger lesson also because it gives me more faith.

So I always encourage, and this is actually, actually this is why it's a bigger lesson also because it gives me more faith. So I always encourage, and this is actually, actually, this is why it's my biggest lesson. I encourage so many people that I coach, so many people that I mentor, obviously everyone in my community and audience and everything to go and follow that, go and live that purpose. And I see time and time again, that when I see people trying to live their purpose, they are protected, that things work. When you're playing in your dharma and your purpose, things work, things move. You feel momentum.

They happen. And I'm not saying they happen without effort, but they happen, they move. Whereas when you're not, you just constantly feel like you're grinding up against a wall. I know, challenges. Just constant.

So what is your purpose and when did you discover it good question what is my purpose is simple it's always has been since not since the beginning because i discovered it afterwards my purpose is making wisdom go viral and i've stuck with that and i've kept it that way because to me and there's more to it making wisdom go viral through entertainment i would say is my purpose, because I believe that that is something that is uniquely my goal, impact, and service. And the beautiful thing is I'm not limited to a platform. So that can be books, it can be podcasts,

it can be TV shows, it can be movies. It's not limited. And this I learned by reading. I was reading after, and this was after my video started to get seen. This wasn't before I did it. It wasn't like I sat down and, and this was after my video started to get seen. This wasn't before I did it. It wasn't like I sat down and I wrote this fancy tagline. I was reading Salim Ismail's book called Exponential Organizations. And in this book, he talks about something called an MTP,

a massive transformational purpose. And he says that every major person organization in the world has an MTP. So an MTPp has to be aspirational it has to be massive and it has to be service and purpose based so google's is organizing the world's information notice it doesn't say we're an seo company notice it doesn't say we do google ads they're organizing the world's information that's how big they're dreaming and when you're organizing the world's information you can do how big they're dreaming. And when you're organizing the world's information, you can do driverless cars, you can do Google Glass, you can sell Google Ads, whatever it is. And so TED's is ideas worth spreading.

That's what they are, that's what they're about. So Jay Shetty is making wisdom go viral. That's what I'm dedicated to. So when did you discover it? Because it wasn't when you were 10, it wasn't when you were 21 in college. I'd say I was 30, probably two, three years ago. I'm 32 now, so I'd say two, three years ago is when I discovered it.

So 30 years old is when you discovered your purpose. Correct. So what was your purpose before that? My purpose before that was finding my purpose. It's like that process of just like, my purpose before that was 14 years. So I've been online for four years. I've spent 10 years offline talking about the same stuff, sharing the same messages in talks, in universities,

in small seminars, in coaching and mentoring. Like I've been doing the same thing for 14 years. But I didn't realize it was my purpose until very recently. But I just did what I enjoyed and naturally tried to get better at it. So if we don't know what our purpose is and we're working towards finding our purpose, it's okay. That's actually where you're going to spend most of your life. Discovering what your purpose is.

Totally. And that's the best bit. Because I think a lot of people are like, well, I don't know what my purpose is. Totally. How do I find it? The pressure of finding your purpose will stop you from finding your purpose. Literally. The pressure is so heavy.

And that's why it's not about finding that. It's just starting with the basics. What am I good at? And I talk about it and I break down Dharma in here. And I talk about what is your passion? What is your expertise? What is your compassion? Because that's really important.

What is your compassion for the world? Like, what problem do you want to solve? I often, people will say there's so many things I could do. There's so many things that I'm like, my question is not what causes you the greatest joy. Sometimes my question is what is, what causes you the greatest pain? Make that your purpose.

Make that your purpose. If you don't know what your joy is, you definitely know what your pain is. What do you not like in the world? What do you not like? And so for me. Go serve that thing. A hundred percent.

So for me, the greatest pain I see in the world is people not reaching their potential. I know. It's painful. That causes me more pain because I believe that there is someone out there who is stacking shelves who has the cure to cancer. There is someone out there who- Or is a talented singer. Is a talented singer. There is someone out there who's not living to their potential, and I think we're better people, we're better partners, and we're better parents when we

live to our potential. So that's what I'm trying to solve. And I'm not saying that's the biggest thing. I'm just saying it's my thing. Whenever I work with people, I'm always telling them to find your purpose, focus on what you're most passionate about or what you have the most pain around. There you go.

It's the same thing. Do the thing you love the most and keep doing it until you either discover that's it or maybe you don't love that anymore. Like I played so many sports growing up I used to love baseball used to love soccer and then I got bored with it I got burnt out by it it wasn't a love of mine anymore wasn't a passion and then I switched to football and it was like oh this is a passion and I'm actually more gifted physically for this sport than I would

be for soccer I was too big for soccer. I couldn't run seven miles a day right on the field. But I think you need to try lots of things and you might think it's a passion, but you might get burnt out and discover, eh, I don't love it anymore. What else is there? And keep trying new things. Like you said, eight new things a month. Yeah. Till you discover. Till you discover it. And it might take you to your 30, 40, 50, right? And that doesn't matter. Like it doesn't matter. Like, it doesn't matter. Like, the fun is in the growth and the journey and the,

like for me, the last 10 years before this happened and my life changed, it was like, those were fun. I was happy. I wasn't unhappy

because of that because I didn't have, you didn't know the exact purpose of your life. Yeah, exactly. And now I'm very clear on it and I'm happy for it to evolve too. Like, I don't think

it has to stay the same. I may sit with you in two years time and tell you something completely different and I'm okay with that. But I can only work with what I have now and I think we start trying to postpone our purpose or find a date by which you have to... You put a deadline on your purpose? It doesn't make any sense. If you really care about it, how can you put a deadline on it?

You just keep working towards it. In this section, motivational speaker and bestselling author Lisa Nichols talks about how to not let fear get in the way of your purpose. I'm a big believer in attacking your fears head on because they can truly hold you back in life. Which one is more valuable if you can only choose one? Negative thoughts, but positive words? Positive thoughts, but negative words? Or do they both need to be in alignment towards your mission and purpose? Well, so I'll start with this. Your life is a physical manifestation of the conversation going on in your head. I'm going to start with that.

And we just speak for like 24 hours on this. I love this. Right. Your life is a physical manifestation of the conversation going on in your head. So if you said nothing but thought everything, your life is going to show up to make your thoughts true. So you have one job. You have one job in your life for you to make what you think about life true so that you're not wrong. You don't want to walk around wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong. You want to be right about the life you see.

So you're going to work hard, work hard to produce the life that you talk about in your mind. Whether that life is no one loves me, I'm all alone. You can be in a group of people and you will think I'm so alone. And you will feel alone and things will show up to co-sign your loneliness just because you're looking for that. And so if you start with, I must say, the mind, like the mind is that thing. The mind is the core engine. It starts all things. It shuts all things down. When I start thinking something different, I'm like, hold on, stop. I want to think something. I shut down that behavior. I shut down that outcome. When I birth something, I birth it in my mind. I focus on my mind. I see myself there in my mind. Before I got on're juicy and I'm saying see yourself here because if

you can see it and then the the key is evoke the emotion as if you were there yep right and that's why people are who are sad all the time are sad because they're thinking of things that make them sad and then the emotion follows the thought. So I must say everything starts with your thought, Lewis. But let me just say this. When you speak, you speak your future into the world. You speak your future. Whatever you say, whatever falls off your tongue, when you say I am, the unconscious mind says and you are so whatever

comes on the other side of that and so you you you ask me a hard question which one is most important it starts with the thought i think the thought is that that's where everything originates and then you add a whole lot of turbo boost to it with your tongue yeah when you align the two and then you add to it like the b12 the b12 of action action is like action is like that's the nitro that's the nitro like right and i see so many people they think it they write it they journal it they talk about it and they do no action and i go you understand that the action is that that's like that's like putting the flower in the sun because they require sun and so yeah yeah i had this is a beautiful explanation and i had a navy seal on uh six seven months ago his

name is chad and he he talked about as a seal uh he he used the tongue as a rudder in a boat he said what you speak is going to lead you down you know the ocean or the river or wherever on the boat you're on and so he never says anything negative out loud because it's so powerful in the navy seals he talked about how powerful it is no matter how much pain they're experiencing in hell week and all this stuff they're dealing with, they never allow the tongue to speak something negative. Otherwise they'll ultimately quit and give up. Right.

Right. Right. Right. Right. It's too painful to deal with what they deal with. Right. To then say, ah,

I'm hurting. I'm tired. I can't do it. Right. Right. Don't, don't, don't speak that.

Don't speak that into the universe. You just, because whatever you speak feels like it expands. Of course. Right. Energy grows where energy goes it expands so speak life speak possibility there is not one dark situation that doesn't have a glimmer of light it doesn't mean it's going to be convenient to see that's true most of us are looking for convenient light yes oh man i want to speak for like five more hours with you. But I want to try to finish with a few final questions here. Yes.

Even though I don't want to finish this. We'll have to come back on. Yeah, we'll bring it back on. Let's just do this again. I promise it won't be as challenging to get me in the future. I promise, my friend. I want to talk about, for a moment, purpose. Because I feel like right now we're seeing a lot of people with scattered purposes, especially with everything that's happening in the world over the last three months, six months.

I'm seeing so many big influencers go through divorce who are publicly had great relationships. I'm seeing people's businesses go under because they were in the events business or whatever, and they weren't able to adapt and shift. I'm seeing people scattered with their purpose and unclear. Right. How can people, let's speak to this because I think it's two different questions. One is how to truly figure out what your purpose is because I think it's seasonal. You know, what your purpose was when you were 10 is different now. I agree. It's seasonal. So it's hard for, it's a very broad question. And I don't want to set you up with that. Uh, cause I think it's unfair when people ask you that for me, but if you know, you think I know what my purpose is, like, I know I'm meant to go do this thing. I think,

I think I'm supposed to go after this. I feel like maybe I should try this thing, but I'm afraid. How do you, how would you coach someone who knows what they're supposed to do, or at least they think they do until they figure it out and it's not it or it is it. How do you coach people or encourage people to actually do it, to actually overcome that final hurdle of fear, whether they're afraid of failure, afraid of success, afraid of judgment, whether they've got a really good life and a really good job, but it's just not there. It's not pulling them to their ultimate purpose. Where do you, where do you share in that line? So one of the first things I do is I ask them to please let's quantify and give life to what does it cost you to stay still?

So, you know, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a straight, no chaser kind of girl, right? I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, we're not just going towards something. We also have to realize that to the same degree that you asked the weight loss, why did I do it? I, because what would it cost me with all my success? What would it have cost me to stay in that 220 pound body? What's the cost? And so when I saw that, that's why I responded. If I didn't give myself this, right, I was very clear with the cost. So number one, I would say, what does it cost you? And I,

and my students know me, I do this in my, in my workshop, my trainings for my platinum level students and my students know me, I do this in my, in my workshop, my trainings for my, my, my platinum level students and my coaches and students that are getting certified to be a Lisa Nichols trainer. And I asked them hard questions. What does it cost you to stay in that mindset? And they have to list it. And I say, what part of the price have you already paid? And they just get visceral. They're like,'re like ah and i say so how long i don't know whatever you want how much longer do you want to pay that price right two years ten years two months are we pif are we paid in full now

are we pif i've paid it full and i'll keep paying exactly and so i use this metaphor that if you went to the store and bought a dozen eggs and you went home and you scrambled all the eggs and you cooked the eggs and then you took the empty carton back to the grocery store and you said, I'd like to buy these again. The cashier will go, but you already bought them. Why are you buying it? Why are you paying for it again? That's what we're doing. We're paying for the same behavior over and over again. And so one, get clear that you're PIF, that you're paid in full for not being in action. Like I've already paid it. I've been three years of wanting a dream and not have, whatever your reasons are, right? Number two is

let's talk about everything that happens if you fail. Let's just unpack that. You go back to where you're at now. Yeah. Actually, you never are back to where you are now because now you got some kind of lesson that you didn't have yeah right you got some kind of experience so so what happens if you fail okay great so what lessons can we pull out of that so now let's agree to if we fail let's fail forward so then let's define what does failing forward look like so then we get very descriptive on what does failing forward look like. So then we get very descriptive on what does failing forward look like. What will I do with the lessons? What will I, I'll document four to six things I did right.

And I'll document two to three things that I can improve upon and I'll implement them all on the next go round. So then we take out all the possibility. And I even go as far as saying, so what if people judge you? I unpack it. What do people judge you? Let's say they talk really bad about you on social media for like three days. Like it goes a while. Well, then what happens? Well, on the juice out of the, out of the, out of the balloon of all, we just deep dive into the darkness of your illusions, deep dive into the darkness of your mind. So like what? Okay. Well, my, I'll lose this money. Okay. You lost how much? 40,000. Okay. All 40,000 gone. So now what? I don't know. Okay. Well, let's, let's, let's figure out a plan because you already lost the money. We lost the money. Let's, let's, now I can start saving again or I can do whatever. Okay, great. So then every, all these big

possibilities are now just situations. Then I go to, so what can we do to eliminate the possibility of that occurring? So now we go into strategy. So I'm real big on strategy. I'm real big on milestones. I believe that you should not set a macro goal without setting several micro goals. So I live in micro goals. Like my number that I want to generate this year, I don't ever look at that after November of the year prior. After November 2019, I don't really look at it. I look at every monthly goal because that's my milestone. I know that goal and I know that goal is tied into my annual goal. So I don't have to worry about it. So I'm seeing if I'm on track, off track, on track, because I can handle that. That's palatable, right? So then a lot of times entrepreneurs set like big, bodacious goal, and you have a release of endorphins when you first set it, but then it

goes away because you don't even know how you're going to get there. Yeah. And so I'm real big on my, like just on my campus, I'm real big on three things, a strategy, right? Milestones and accountability. Buy when dates, buy when, buy who, right? And so make it doable, make it so you can see it, set it up in 90 days. And so I think think that purpose comes with a plan and oftentimes we live we leave purpose so big and so ambiguous that it feels difficult to touch and so if you're supposed to inspire millions okay great so for august how many are you gonna touch toward that million we're gonna get to millions we We're going to get to millions. But are we touching 5,000?

Are we touching 50,000? And then by November, did you grow your social media platform by 3% or by 30%? Like less something trackable and measurable so that you can see that purpose being fulfilled. So you can trust your picker. that purpose being fulfilled. So you can trust your picker. So many of us haven't had enough indicators, haven't had enough evidence that we've done it the way we thought we would do it or better, that now you're starting to pull back on trusting your picker. Well, you need evidence. If the court of law sends a man to prison because of evidence or lets a woman walk because of lack of evidence, then why not use evidence in your life that you're ready for such a time as this? But you have to set it

up in such a way where you can see the trackable evidence. What do we say to ourselves when we don't do self-care? What are we saying about how much we are worth to ourselves when we don't, when we delay that for months and years of taking care of ourselves? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not important enough to put at the front of my own line. You always are going to have a line of people to serve, things to do. And you got one job to stand at the front of your own line. You're saying that you're training other people how to treat you by the way you treat yourself. And so you are saying that I still need to heal in the area of feeling important enough to prioritize my self-care. You also may be saying

and can be saying, I still need to learn how to fall in love with myself enough to take care of me the way I take care of others. And that's so many people. You take care of those around you far better than you take care of yourself. Yeah, yeah. In this section, visionary and yogi Sadhguru shares where suffering comes from in most people's lives, what we can do about it, and how we can maximize the opportunity that we have while being alive. I love the fact that you are a symbol of childlike energy in the world. Fun, play, and possibility.

Why aren't adults fun? What happened to them? Exactly. I mean, adults, as you know, get caught up in a lot of things that aren't their true nature. And why is that? Why is that, do you think, that we forget how to play and think like a child when we grow up? See, people have forgotten that

in this vast cosmos where we don't know where is the beginning, where is the end, in the middle of nowhere, on a tiny little mud ball called Earth, you and me are sitting long distance and talking right now, okay? So, and for the kind of creatures we are, we are not even a speck of dust in this universe. But we have an individual experience.

This is the magnanimity of creation, that it's given as an individual experience, though we are nothing. Tomorrow if the whole humanity evaporates, nobody will miss us in this cosmos, that's how small we are. But we have an individual experience. So this individual experience, human beings have taken it rather too seriously, as if they are the beginning and end of the world. The center of the world, yeah. Yes, they thought they are the beginning and end of the world. The center of the world, yeah.

Yes, they thought they are the center of the universe. So this misunderstanding makes them believe as they grow up or as they degenerate, I would say. They don't really grow up. Because at the age of five, if you are so joyful and energetic, by the time you are thirty, you should be ecstatic and bursting. But if the reverse has happened, this is degeneration of life. So this degeneration happens because people take their individual existence rather too seriously. They don't

understand before you and me came here, countless number of people who thought they were smart and they were strong and they were beautiful and they were wonderful, they are all topsoil now, countless number of people. And you and me also will be one day, unless our friends to... our friends choose to bury us really deep fearing that we may raise from the dead or something. So we have taken our individual existence too seriously. Because of this, life has taken a backseat. Our physical structure has taken front seat, our psychological structures have, you know,

gone to the stratosphere, but the life that we are is somewhere, which is not even in most people's experience. So this is the whole problem. When you were a child, you were just a piece of life. Slowly, you took your personality so seriously, you took your boundaries of your form so seriously, that you think this is it. So till death knocks on their door,

they don't realize that this is not it. People talk about suffering a lot. When I went to India to study meditation for my brief time, my beginner mind of meditation, I was told that suffering is the obsessive self-centric thinking that we focus on ourselves, then we suffer. I don't know how accurate that is in your mind or in your practice and philosophy, but what is suffering and why do we have it so much? See, there are two faculties in a human being, which are unique to human beings only. No other creatures have these faculties. This is a very vivid sense of memory and a fantastic sense of imagination.

So what is it that human beings are suffering? Just check out with any suffering human being, they are suffering what happened five years ago, ten years ago or they are suffering what may happen day after tomorrow already. So essentially they are suffering their memory and their imagination. Rarely they are in life, they are just suffering these two fantastic faculties which make us human. Our life is rich only because our memory is so vivid.

Otherwise we would also be like an earthworm. Essentially what they're complaining is, they're complaining, why did nature evolve us into this fantastic place of being human being? We would have been happy being earthworms because our only intention is to be eco-friendly right now. Earthworms are very eco-friendly, they are very peaceful, but the possibility is only that much. With the possibility, human being is a tremendous possibility.

If you do not know how to harness this possibility, every possibility will become a problem. That's all that's happened. If you do not harness your faculties the way you should, then it becomes a problem. How come this has happened to us? Charles Darwin said something like this, I'm simplifying it, oversimplifying it, but something like this. A goat could have become a giraffe over a million year time.

A pig could have become an elephant over many more million years. But a monkey became a man rather too quickly. Hmm. So quickly that anthropologists are looking for a missing link which they have not found. Actual difference, the DNA difference between a chimpanzee and a human being is only 1.23 percent. 1.23 percent is not too much of a difference, isn't it? So physiologically, physiologically that's how close we are to a chimpanzee.

But in terms of our intelligence and awareness, we are worlds apart from a chimpanzee. So right now what human beings are suffering is their own intelligence. You remove half their brain, they will be very peaceful. No meditation will be needed for them. They will simply sit. And just be, yeah, exactly. Yes, just be, because that's what the whole American spirituality is just talking about, just be, just be.

If you remove half the brain, you'll just be. That's what a whole lot of people are trying to do by soaking their brains in alcohol, maybe they're preserving it for some other place or drugging themselves out. They're just being, all right? That is not the way to explore human possibility. If human possibility has to be explored, all our faculties must be full on and we must see how to further enhance them because the profoundness of experience comes to you only with sharpness of perception. You cannot dull your perception and think you're having a profound experience. Right now…

So how do we… Sorry, go ahead. Please, please tell me. You know, so how do we maximize or expand our perception? See, it's like this. Because as human beings, we knew that only enhancement of our perception, our life will become better. We wanted to see what is up there.

Our eyes could not see, so we made a telescope. We want to see the virus, so we made a telescope. We want to see the virus, so we made a microscope. We want to hear what is happening somewhere else, so we made a telephone, we made a microphone, see you and me talking, literally twelve hours across the planet, all right? Why all these technologies we made? We want to enhance our perception, isn't it? Yeah. So right now, this is a bunch of youth, you know, all… all these youth events, below twenty-five events, I get invited because they think I'm twenty-five. You have the my… you have the curiosity of a child, that's why they bring you.

So they were asking me, Sadhguru, you have so much influence in the government, why can't you make marijuana legal for us? So this is over ten, fifteen thousand people in Bangalore city and it's an open-air thing, I can smell the smoke. They all gathered and they're saying, why don't you make it legal for us? I said, why this marijuana? We will make cocaine also legal, meth also legal, whatever else you name it, I will make

all that legal for you. But why do you want it… wanted this to be legal? Because you want to smoke dope and go to the university, isn't it? Yes, they said, why not? We are fine with that. I said, see, we'll do one thing. I'll get you a small plane. And the pilot comes really smoked up.

Do you want to fly with him? Ahhh, like this. Then I said, you're not getting it, you need a major surgery. The surgeon comes really smoked up. You want the surgery? They said, no. So you understand, by smoking these things or drinking these things, whatever, your faculties go down.

Lowered faculties will mean less efficiency of life, not only in terms of work, in terms of experience also. It means less life. So you want to be high, but you are going low and you're thinking you're high. If you want to be high, you come to me, I will show you how to tune up all your faculties to such a level that you will be bright and alert all the time, joyful, blissful, ecstatic, look at my eyes, I am always toned without any substance. Because this is the most complex and sophisticated chemical factory on the planet.

The question is only, are you a great CEO or a lousy CEO? That's all determines the nature of your experience. So I don't want to give a philosophical explanation to human suffering. Human suffering is essentially that they have an intelligence for which they don't have a stable enough platform. So they don't know how to handle their own intelligence. You can call it tension, stress, anxiety, misery, whatever, essentially your intelligence has turned against you. That is all it is. When we have emotions, thoughts, or feelings, emotions of anger, resentment from something that happened in the past, upset that we see on social media, frustrations in the world,

where should we be redirecting these thoughts, feelings, and emotions? Should we be feeling them and allowing ourselves to go with anger until it stops? Should we be guarding our thoughts with the reverse of that? What's your ideas on thoughts, feeling, and emotions? You must punch a window pane or a wall better. A stone wall is good. You'll feel the boy, yeah, exactly. Because that is the model that the Hollywood and the television shows, everything is setting up.

When you get angry, you break something, all right? Exactly. So, see first of all, people are assuming that anger is happening to them or misery is happening to them. No, this is exactly what I said earlier, maybe I didn't articulate it fully. No, you are creating anger, you are creating misery, you are creating joy, you are creating whatever, all this is happening from within you. Is it true all human experience is happening from within us? It's… it's… yeah, because we perceive something and then we…

No, no. Something else… something else may stimulate, but human experience is happening from within us, isn't it? Right. Whether it's love or hate or anger or misery or joy or anything is only happening from within us. The simple question I am asking is, what happens from within you, should you ha… should it happen your way or somebody else's way? It should happen your way.

Of course, because the world will never happen your way hundred percent. Because there are so many stakeholders in the world, little bit will happen my way, little bit your way, that is fine. But what happens within me must happen my way. If what happens within me does not happen my way, this is the worst form of slavery, isn't it? Wow. Somebody decides what happens within me.

Somebody decides where I should sit, this is slavery, everybody understands this. Now somebody decides whether I am happy or unhappy, isn't this the worst form of slavery? Yeah. So this is the liberation that humanity needs to work at. This is what inner engineering means. Inner engineering is not some mechanical process, because engineering means this essentially. You will say something is well engineered only if it works the way you want, isn't it?

If this one doesn't work the way you want, what the hell are you expecting other things to work the way you want? It's just an accident. When you live accidentally, anxiety is normal. Yes, it's every day. But when you're living on purpose and intentionally and mindfully, you should be able to shift out of that. No, no, no, no, I wouldn't use those words. Okay, what words would you use? When you say purpose, intention, mindful. See, this is the whole problem with people, their mind is full all the time.

Dr. K. R. R. Right. My mind is just empty all the time, nothing happening, nothing. That's why I wear a turban just to make it substantial. There's nothing in my head. If I'm walking there, I'm just walking, nothing happens. Because see, right now your hands are there. Suppose your one hand starts jumping like this. What if, let's say my hand starts jumping like this, what will you think? You think Sadhguru has some kind of a issue, isn't it? I just…

Sir, no? That's the way intelligent people do things, you know? No, no. Suppose my hand starts jumping like that, you will think there is some ailment, isn't it? You will think I am… maybe Mr. Parkinson's is visiting me or something like that. Sure. So, your mind is jumping all the… all over the place. Why is that not ailment, I'm asking?

Your only comfort is other people cannot see it, isn't it? Yeah, I guess they see it through the manifestation of you being anxious or tense or stressed or angry or… No, whether they see it or not, they see it or not. If any part of you is simply jumping without purpose, is that an ailment, I'm asking? If any part of you is simply jumping without purpose, is that an ailment, I'm asking? If any part of you is jumping without purpose, is it an ailment? Well, I think in your Inner Engineering course, you talk about how we have certain faculties that we can't control, like going to the bathroom and doing certain things that are part of our body.

So… Yeah, but… I don't know if that's a trick question or not, but… No, no, the pee is just filling up in the bladder. It's not jumping all over the place. Gotcha, gotcha. If it jumps all over the place, that is an ailment. That's an ailment, yes, correct. Right now, suppose… let me take a worse example.

Yes. Suppose your hand starts beating you in the face. That's an ailment, yes. For sure. So, right now, your thoughts and emotions are beating you in the face. That's an ailment, yes. For sure. So right now, your thoughts and emotions are beating you up from inside. Why is that not an ailment, I'm saying? No, it is. So, let us not think anger happens to us, resentment happens to us.

No, these things we are creating, we have the power to emote. We can make it love, we can make it joy, we can make it ecstasy, but people have chosen to make it tension, anger, resentment, hatred, they have turned it that way. Now they will claim this is because life has been unfair to me. Life has not been fair to anybody, especially not me. Life is not fair to anybody. Life is simply rolling, it's for you to learn to ride it. Sometimes we are in uncomfortable situations, sometimes we are in comfortable situations, sometimes we are in situations where we know exactly what to do, and sometimes we are in

situations where we don't know what to do, sometimes somebody else is controlling the situation, sometimes you're controlling the situation. This is how life is. If you are constantly stepping into unfamiliar situations in your life, that means you are growing at a rapid pace. If you are in constantly in comfortable situations, that means you're a stagnant life. So if you… if you look for comfort, if you look for a comfort zone, because the moment

your thoughts and emotions are going to torment you with external stimulant… external stimulation that happens, what will you choose? You will choose a comfort zone. This means you will limit your life. So the moment somebody can cause you pain or suffering, this means unknowingly you will make the very scope of your life very limited. Only when a person loses this fear of suffering, that no matter what happens, this is how I will be. If this assurance comes to you, then you walk full stride because whatever happens in the life around you, it will not really make you suffer.

Once you are free from suffering, only when you're free from suffering, when you're free from the fear of suffering, that is when you will explore your life in full depth and dimension. How do we rid ourselves of the fear of suffering then? See, as I told you, the suffering is happening because your faculties are not held in your hands. If I have to go to this in little detail, I will have to take a few minutes. See, for example, if I ask you a simple question, do you want your intellect to be sharp or blunt? What is your choice? Sharp.

Sharp, of course. So you understand, your intellect is… the better… the sharper it is, the better it is, it's like a knife. So if it's like a knife, it's a cutting instrument. So if you give anything to your intellect, it will dissect everything and see. This is the nature of our intellect. You don't have to physically dissect, but it dissects everything and sees, what is this, what is that? This is the nature of the intellect. Without dissection, it doesn't know, because it is a knife, it's like a skull-pell. It must be sharp. A knife that is not sharp is no good knife, isn't it? Right. Good for butter. That also depends. If it just comes out of the refrigerator, even that it won't cut.

So, if you are using a knife to do everything, to do everything. Let's say you eat with a knife, you brush with your knife and you do everything with your knife, of course you will be bleeding. That's all that's happening. Only one dimension of intelligence within us. In yogic way of looking at things, we look at mind as sixteen parts. This intellect is just one part. Because our education systems are such, which are totally intellect-oriented, human beings largely are using only one dimension of their intellect to do everything. You use a knife to stitch your clothes, what will you wear? Only tatters. See, that's what you're seeing in Los Angeles right now, half the people are wearing tattered clothes, maybe they used a knife to stitch their jeans.

Hmm, exactly, with holes in them, yes. So if you use a knife to stitch, that's what will happen, all tatters. Right now human life is in tatters, mainly because of this, instead of using a needle, you're using a knife. So intellect is a very good instrument of survival. If you want to survive on this planet, you need a sharp intellect. The sharper it is, the better you will survive. In this section, best-selling author and actress Priyanka Chopra shares why it's so important for you to believe in yourself and

the different ways she's learned to build confidence and overcome insecurities throughout her life. What is the self-talk you do internally? If you don't have a mirror, if you're not alone in a bathroom, what's your process that you say to yourself? What are the reminders? What are the mantras, meditations that you think about before that? It always helps me to voice it.

Whenever I'm insecure, I either I'll write about it somewhere, or I'll speak to somebody who I trust, my mom, my husband, my best friends. But I find it easier to talk about it. So that's why I have a healthier relationship with my insecurities because I

take away their power by discussing them. I choose not to live with them alone in the dark recesses of my mind because then they become monsters and then they become really, really large. And, and they're usually not real. So it's always been very helpful to me whenever I'm feeling crazy or insecure or afraid, or even if I feel like I've made a mistake. I love everything you're saying. And I'm just a big believer that if people really listen to this and understand and take

it in what you're sharing, that it's hard to achieve anything without confidence. You could have the greatest experience. You could have the greatest degree, the skills, you could have the family, you could have the money, like you could have good looks, whatever it is, you could have this stuff. But if you don't know how to build confidence when it matters, it doesn't matter if the world believes in you. If we don't believe in ourselves, nothing's going to happen. And the world won't believe in you if we don't believe in ourselves nothing's going to happen and the world won't believe in you if you don't believe in you and i i think like as as someone in the public profession you know my job is to be entertaining and be confident and in every step that i take and in every move that i make. But I think recognizing that confidence is not something we are born with.

It's a skill. It's like, you know, it's a muscle almost. If you think of it like going to the gym and, you know, to have muscles and shape, you've got to work at it. Just like the vocal cords, people, the greatest musicians in the world, they use, you know, their vocal cords. They do riyaz, like we call it in Hindi, but which is warm ups and stuff like that. So confidence to me is like that. You start using that at a very small level. Every day life, you know, when you're in school, there were times when I was in school where I used to take the other hallway because I didn't want to bump into someone else. When I started high school, by the time I was in 11th grade, I was walking in the middle of the hallway.

You're strutting around, you get people moving away. Yeah, I was like, excuse me. I didn't even have to say that. I was just walking because that's the same person. But I think that in any profession or any aspect of life, confidence is, perception is reality. Most people believe that, right? You know that how people perceive you is what they think reality is. So give them something perceivable. Amen to that. What would you say are three things on a daily basis that you do

to build confidence that you think anyone could apply for their life, even if they feel like they have no confidence. When I wake up in the morning, I take time in the bathroom. Like I shower, I will, you know, pick the outfit that I'm feeling today. I will, you know, sort of doing my makeup and my hair sort of helps me or my skincare routine actually at night helps me be sort of introspective otherwise through the day I'm very erratic I have you know multiple balls in the air professionally I'm doing a lot of things I'm always behind on time I'm always playing catch up so at the end of the night and the beginning of the day I really give myself

some silence I play music and you know I put my creams on and I really think about what the day is going to be like and how my first step outside the room is going to be. When I take that first step outside my safe space, it sets the tone for my day. So I try not to have it be erratic or scary or like if I'm late and if I'm running, that always sets the tone for my energy through the day. So I try to really, you know, start my day on the tone I want to have and the confidence I want to have. And at every given step during the day, I remind myself of the things I have instead of the things I don't have. myself of the things I have instead of the things I don't have. Like insecurity comes from a lot of it sometimes I think comes from, oh my gosh, I don't have this. It's not good enough, or I'm not good enough for a particular scenario or a particular situation, or, you know, we start

judging ourselves. And this was another lesson, actually, an activity that my mom and I used to do is we used to count our blessings. And, you know, me and my husband do it, too, whenever we're feeling crazy because our schedules are insane. We're, you know, always in different parts of the world. We do that. We count our blessings about just five things that whenever you're feeling sort of crazy and unstable that, you know, you have that you're really grateful for. And I'm not even saying this superficially. This was like truly an exercise. No matter how badly off you are, someone else is worse off than you. That makes it so easy to count your blessings.

I mean, especially watching this latest movie that you're in. I mean, White Tiger. I've only been to India once. I went there four years ago and studied meditation in Chennai for a couple of weeks, but I went to Delhi and kind of traveled around a little bit. I didn't see everything, but I saw a lot of dark things and a lot of things that were constantly reminding me,

wow, I have a lot to be grateful for every moment. So I think it's important to have that perspective in our lives that we always have something to be grateful for. Even when it's the darkest time, there's something to be grateful for. Absolutely. And that's so empowering. That to me is my greatest mantra is, you know, truly and tangibly do it on your fingers, do it like just five things. And it's a great exercise to do with someone as well. Your kids, your family, you know, um, anytime it's just like five things, then you have to just say, rattle it out. Um,

the five things that you can think of at that point. But, um, you know, the crazy part about the white tiger is that it's based in India and you probably reacted to it because it's because it's shot so authentically. But if you think about it, the majority of the world lives in those conditions, and the socioeconomic divide that exists right now is only increasing. Like even the sustainable development goals

have been set to eradicate extreme poverty because it's such a big problem there's such a large population of the world and we as privileged society we as privileged people anyone who has a roof above their head and meals on their table is privileged and as privileged people like that's something that's our concern. You know, there's a large generation of children who don't have a choice in their future or in their lives. They don't know if they can have aspirations or dreams. And how desensitized we were last time, you know, you've driven past a homeless shelter and you've not even looked at it or a homeless person and not even looked at them. It's the desensitization that we as people who have, and that's the differentiation between the have-nots.

But it's also a reality and it's a reality everywhere in the world. I don't want to give away the whole movie. I want everyone to watch it because it was really powerful and inspiring to see someone come from, you know, poverty to essentially become, you know, an entrepreneur and be successful in their own way. And the story is really powerful. But you took on a role that is, I found fascinating because that's probably not, I don't know if that's how you would react in real life, because I know you have such a giving, grateful heart, caring about humanity. But your character does something that's very controversial. And you essentially, from my opinion, don't take accountability. And how did you feel doing a role that is probably against your morals, your values and the way you live your life right now? I never judge my characters.

You know, like I never judge people. Live and let live. Each person is individual to their decisions. And if I started to judge, I would never be able to play bad guys. And I love playing bad guys. But I think what was most interesting for me when I was playing Pinky is she's an American, you know, and I'm an Indian who's grown up in India and understands the complexity of

the diversity of that country. There is no one India. There is multiple Indias and you can spend your whole life trying to get to know it. And you'll still never know her. So this is one aspect of India that is showcased in this movie. But it's also, it's more than that. It's the story of this one man and everyone else from his perspective. So it's not us looking at him or the country.

It's him looking at all of us saying, oh, you know, and especially with my character, she's woke, but she's fake woke. She's one of those girls who's like, why don't you pull yourselves out of your circumstances? I, my parents worked in a bodega, you know, and I pulled myself out. Why don't you do it? He doesn't have a roof over his shoulders his his family doesn't have food it's a completely different complexity that most woke people don't have the ability to understand including me i lived there and i can't claim to understand it because you know i um have had um you know, lively life rights since I was a child.

I've been to school. I've had an opinion about where my future is going to be choices. And that's what's so amazing to me about this movie, that I leaned into playing a character that was fake woke and pivoted when it wasn't convenient. Me and my husband, both, in the movie, not my real husband. Right, right. The character in the movie, both of us sort of like were like,

this is not the right thing. But, you know, when it was inconvenient, we kind of stood back and watched. And that's a very human testament. I'm curious about your evolution as a woman in this industry. Typically, younger women are more desirable for opportunities in their late teens, early 20s. And it's like when you're 26, 27, it's almost like you're old as a woman and you may not be the young, sexy one anymore or something in this industry. How do you feel after getting into your late 30s now? How have you evolved

personally to not allow that stigma to hold you back from being who you want to be, from accepting yourself, from loving yourself, from innovating and reinventing yourself that you've done so many times? How do you not let that stigma hold you back? I can't say that I don't. I just am hoping that it doesn't happen to me. We live in a world where anything is possible right now, as we've seen in the last few months, years as well. And I think that I remember when I was 28, my mom sat me down one day and she said, you know, girls have a shelf life and you're reaching that where, you know, the older boys, they're always looking for the younger girl to act with. And even if they're in their fifties, you know,

they're still going to be working with 20 year olds, but you're going to be old and you need to think about a business. If acting opportunities stop coming your way, that's how I actually started my production house. Because I was like, you're right. What if I'm like, I need to be financially independent in my life. But at the same time, while this was happening to me, I recognized that innovation and reinventing who I am, even for me, is so important and being true to the craft that I'm doing and the service that I have to provide, which is my job. So I started trying new things. I started wanting to grow. I didn't want to stagnate into doing the same kind of roles. I didn't want to stagnate in similar kind of parts

or even languages and borders. And I did music. I was signed as a recording artist to Interscope, Prime and Pose. I pivoted from that into television that I had never done, English language TV. Then I moved into features in America. Now I'm producing in India and America and acting in both these countries, which are two of the greatest movie industries in the world. But if I sat down to think about the glass ceiling that was built for me, I would never have a trajectory powerful enough to break it. Wow. Because I didn't make that glass ceiling. So I don't want to think about where it is. You know, it's been made by other people. So you just kind of have to have, you know, speed and run towards your end game and, you know,

have a goal and be ambitious and fuel that ambition every single day. What is the end game? To have a legacy, I think. I want my children to be proud of, you know, the, the legacy that I've had. I want to be hopefully, you know, part of, you know, the history books of entertainment where I may have contributed to the arts in some way with the work that I have done or the work that I create or the work

that I will do. So I want to be able to, as a woman, you know, leave a better world for the girls after us, like the women before me did for me. I don't think about voting today. I don't think about driving today. I don't think about aspiring to have the same job as a man. And all of those fights were fought by women that came before me. So it's my responsibility and our responsibility as a generation to leave it better for the next one. So those are broad strokes of my end games. And what, I mean, I'm sure you get this question a lot. I'm just curious because my audience is a lot of high achievers. They they're big dreamers. They're going after what they want. They're learning the skills, the tools to become more

confident, more giving, all those things. It sounds like you're doing everything all at the same time. How do you navigate intimacy, connection, love with your husband, your family, your friends, the people that matter the most to you? How do you navigate relationships with such a busy full plate? It's not easy. You know, there's not as much face time as you would possibly want. But I, when I made the deal with the devil about, you know, running at this fast pace many years ago, I realized that there would be sacrifices that are required. And, um, you know, when you have, there's no free lunch in the world. And when you have ambitions, you've got to sort of

pay for it. And, um, but I overcompensate or I try and compensate, um, with making sure, even if I don't have FaceTime or if I've like for a very long time in my life, I missed, um, you know, birthdays and Diwali and New Year's and I would always be working and all I could do was apologize. And my family always understood because, you know, I was working at something. But I think that I made sure that I always call. I never forget birthdays. I will always call on a birthday. If I go to a city, even if I can't meet someone, my family, my friends, I'll make sure we FaceTime.

I'm very, it made me very thoughtful about the people I love. I love loving the people that I care about. I love making them feel special. And I love being empathetic. And I think it's very important to leave the baggage of the job behind when you walk into your house and just be true to what you're feeling. I think it's important to choose relationships when you're really busy, because we can all be caught up in life. And, you know, life is like a really fast river. You know, you don't know what the currents are going to be

because it's just moving. You don't know what you're going to bump into because it's just moving. But you have to choose to hold on to something when you want to take a breath, right? Just like that, you have to choose to hold on to a relationship, whatever that might be with your children, with your family, with your parents, you have to choose to hold on to a relationship whatever that might be with your children with your family with your parents you have to make the time and you have to tell the people you love that you love them don't just assume that they know you've got some wisdom

priyanka i love this uh oh thank you i'm curious about i know how uh meaningful the relationship was with your father and he obviously got to experience a lot of your success. And I'm sure he was extremely proud of you for, you know, the 3000 movies and all the projects you worked on. But I'm curious, what do you think personally, he would be most proud of that you've done in your life since his passing? That I didn't give up. You know, that I didn't rest on my laurels. He used to always push me. He would always push me to never be satisfied with what I have. He pushed my ambition. He flamed my ambition. He was always like, what's the next thing? What are we doing? He loved hearing stories about the next movies that I was doing. I used to literally marry them to him in the hospital bed as well.

This is my character. And I used to break down my characters with him or movies that I wanted to make. And, you know, there were phases in my life, like that a little bit of a dark phase, especially after my dad died, where I felt like I don't know if I could keep up with the life that I had built and what was expected of me by then. Because I personally took a hit and I personally was feeling sad and, you know, sadness sort of, sadness is strangely seductive you know it kind of sucks you in and you're it's like it feels comfortable it feels like you're floating and it's easy light might be harsh a little bit

but the joy that you feel when you choose light when you choose to let go of the seduction of sadness. I think my dad was afraid that because I'm very sensitive that I would have been seduced by sadness for a long time. He was very afraid of that. Even before he died, he used to always talk to me about, don't be sad, do not be sad. I'm not going away. I'm always with you. But I was.

I was tremendously sad and but it take it takes choosing yourself and i've done that multiple times um in my life and i think it's such a powerful tool because the longest relationship you have is with yourself i read somewhere that about you sharing that you come into this place alone you leave this place alone you've gotta you know build that relationship with yourself. I love that you keep saying choose yourself because I think it's important for people to be reminded that we need to choose ourselves when no one else will choose us. We need to be there for ourselves when we're sad. It's no one's job. It's no one's job to choose someone else. Your parents will do it for a while,

your spouses will do it for a while, maybe your children will do it for a while. Your spouses will do it for a while. Maybe your children will do it for a while. But you are no one else's responsibility but your own. And what you do with your life and the choices you make dictate the sum of your life. It's such simple math, actually. We are the sum of all our choices. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's show with all the important links. And also make sure to share this with a friend and subscribe over on Apple Podcasts as

well. I really love hearing feedback from you guys. So share a review over on Apple and let me know what part of this episode resonated with you the most. And if no one's told you lately, I want to remind you that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.