The School of Greatness - How To Heal Your Trauma To Manifest Your Most Abundant Life | Melissa Wood-Tepperberg
Episode Date: November 6, 2024In this deeply personal and transformative conversation, I sit down with wellness entrepreneur and motivational speaker Melissa Wood-Tepperberg. From growing up in a dysfunctional household to battlin...g eating disorders and addiction in her early twenties, Melissa shares her journey of healing and self-discovery. After hitting rock bottom, she found her path through meditation, mindful movement, and a deep connection to her inner self. Today, she's the founder of Melissa Wood Health, impacting millions through her unique blend of wellness practices and motivational speaking. What makes this conversation special is Melissa's raw honesty about her ongoing journey - from navigating business challenges to continuing to unmask layers of herself while building a global wellness empire. Her story is a powerful reminder that success isn't just about external achievements, but about finding true alignment with yourself.Get your FREE 7 day trial of Melissa Wood Health!IN THIS EPISODE YOU WILL LEARNHow to transform past trauma into purpose and help others heal through your own healing journeyWhy success without inner peace and alignment will never truly fulfill youThe power of developing a consistent meditation practice and how it can transform your relationship with yourselfHow to recognize when you're operating from old wounds and patterns, and steps to break freeThe importance of trusting your intuition in business decisions, even when it goes against conventional wisdomFor more information go to https://www.lewishowes.com/1690For more Greatness text PODCAST to +1 (614) 350-3960More SOG episodes we think you’ll love:Gabby Bernstein – greatness.lnk.to/1407SCOMel Robbins – greatness.lnk.to/1582SCLiz Gilbert – greatness.lnk.to/1681SC
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I remember just like getting up looking in the mirror and being like, I hate you.
Wow.
I had so much hate towards myself.
I just had like tears rolling down my face and I was like, I don't want this anymore.
Hi, I'm Melissa Wood Tepperberg.
Certified yoga and Pilates instructor.
I am the founder of the MWH Method.
Melissa Wood Tepperberg.
Melissa Wood Tepperberg.
And I just remember I was like, OK, I want it,
but I need help.
And that was the biggest moment for me
from being a little girl who thought that she could fix
every single thing.
And like, I carried the weight of everyone.
And wow.
But I was just not saving myself.
I felt all the waves of it.
It was definitely a panic attack, I believe,
because I think at that time
I didn't even really know what anxiety was.
But I was like, mm-mm, nope, and like shut the door to it.
And that really translated to like going out drinking.
It was numbing yourself.
Numbing.
I started meditating and that's how I'm here.
It was the thing that helped me see myself
for the first time for who I really was.
Wow, that's beautiful.
I just want to wake people up
to this inner strength within themselves.
That's it. That's what I have to do
for myself every single day.
And I've actually never talked about this, but...
Welcome back, everyone, to the School of Greatness.
Very excited about our guests.
We have the inspiring Melissa Wood Tepperberg in the house.
So good to see you.
I'm so happy to be here.
Very excited.
We connected months ago.
Super Bowl, is that what it was?
Super Bowl party.
Was it Super Bowl or F1?
It was Super Bowl.
Super Bowl.
Gary Vaynerchuk was hosting a little gathering.
We met there, but I'd obviously seen your work online for the last few years as you've continued to just soar with your content, with your message and how you're inspiring and impacting millions
of people around the world.
Mostly, assuming mostly women who kind of follow your content and who are really inspired
by you.
A lot of the women on my team are just like, God, Melissa, she's so amazing and what she's
doing.
And so it's been cool to watch
your, your rise, but I know that, you know, you
grew up very dysfunctional, similar to me. You
struggled in school and kind of cheated your way
through school, similar to me. And, uh, just
didn't feel like you were enough. And so
therefore, you know, similar to me, you wore
masks, you projected like a sense of everything's got
everything put together and everything's got to look perfect
and can't show people the real traumas underneath you.
And you wore those masks for a long time
to protect yourself, to fit in, to belong,
to get ahead, whatever it might be, to survive.
But when did those masks start falling off for you?
When did you really start to feel like, oh, I'm in a dark place the longer and longer
I hold on to this perfect image when underneath I don't feel perfect at all?
Well, interestingly enough, I feel like I'm in this place in my life where I'm like ripping
off a new mask. Right now.
Right now.
Really?
Yes, and honestly, like in this very moment,
because as you overcome or continue to work through,
because I don't ever think you fully, completely heal traumas,
and that's kind of my biggest awakening today is like even after all
the work it's like, and I love the work. I love the process. I've learned to be in the process,
but I'm just discovering new things and new wounds have come to the surface. And I think when you
get to a place of where you are really elevating and you're shifting
into a different gear, like it's amazing what kind of shows its face to like knock you down in a
sense. And almost like I think about it, it's like, how bad do I really want? How bad do I really want
How bad do I really want to continue this quest of becoming? And I grew up in a very dysfunctional upbringing.
I have four sisters.
My baby brother was born when I was 15.
My dad remarried.
But it was just this endless cycle of survival and doing anything that you
can to, you know, for me, I'm the middle child.
And I'm assuming it wasn't like survival, like
we don't have food and shelter survival, but
emotional survival.
Emotional survival.
And we did grow up very poor.
So it was scarcity mindset.
And my mom worked so many jobs, my dad worked so many jobs,
and it was like no matter what,
there was never really enough.
And money, it was always like a stress around money,
probably.
Always, always a stress around money.
And I was very observant to that.
I was so aware of how our surroundings made my mom feel.
And I knew since the age of seven that I could help or I could ease some stress.
And for me, that was like stepping in, like the household and cleaning,
like doing all the chores,
helping my sisters with their homework.
Even like, I made this, we had this chalkboard
and I would like make a list of all the things
that we had to do.
My sisters despised me growing up
because I was super bossy
and I just felt like someone had to step in.
And I just like, I remember that feeling at such a
young age.
And I think when you embody that energy, it's so
wildly disruptive for your nervous system.
And when you're in it, like when I was living in Syracuse,
I just like, I did all the things that I could to just like push it down. And-
What things?
Well, I was embarrassed that, you know, we didn't have a lot of money. When we would go, like when we would get close for school, it was like we got one outfit and then, you know, we didn't have a lot of money when we would go, like when we would get clothes for
school, it was like we got one outfit and then, you know, I would be the one curating the look so
that my sisters and I could swap looks so that we, it looked like we had more money. Yeah, more
clothes and the emotional stuff, you know, when your parents aren't showing up for,
like I remember this, oh my God, so vividly.
I was in second grade and it was like parents' day
and the song, Don't Worry, Be Happy was on.
Wow.
And we were going around in a circle
and every kid had their parent.
And I just like, I remember being alone and just like not having my parents show up.
And I was so embarrassed, but I was so hurt and I wanted to cry.
But I wouldn't because I didn't want other people to see.
And you know, I always tried to make like, oh yeah, no, no.
My mom couldn't come. And I don't even know if my mom remembered,
but I remember the teacher holding my hand and
like walking around with me and like just
trying and those things for me, it was like,
it was constantly those types of things are,
you know, at a softball game and your parents
not showing up or forgetting to pick you up.
And just, you know, they had a lot of kids
and a lot of responsibility, but it's,
when you're a child, it deeply affects you.
Isn't it fascinating that you're still remembering that today?
And it's like, these memories we keep with us.
And you know, you're a parent now,
I'm not a parent yet, but I can only imagine,
like, I'm sure you try to show up
to everything you can, you try to be there for them,
everything you can, but then there might be some amazing
business opportunity where you're like,
oh, do I go do this thing and then have the babysitter
or the nanny make sure they take them to school that day,
but then is that the thing they're gonna remember
when they're 40?
And is that their trauma, gonna be like,
everyone else's parents were there and mine didn't show up
because she had a business meeting or whatever.
It's like you probably can't win as a parent
no matter how hard you try.
There's gonna be some wound or some memory
because at seven, eight, 10 years old
you don't have a lot of life
and that's like such a big moment for your life.
It's such a pressure for a parent, I bet.
It is.
And I think as I become a parent, I am, oh my
gosh, I'm, it like changed my relationship with
my parents.
And then sometimes that changes again, but it's,
it helps you to really understand how freaking
hard it is.
And have compassion for your parents.
Yeah.
And like they didn't have the, they didn't,
and even just like, I think of the mindfulness movement.
I'm like, I don't think those conversations were being had.
They didn't have time.
In survival mode, you don't have time to be mindful.
No.
You're just, what do I need to do right now to survive?
Yes.
Emotionally, you know, and maybe financially or physically or whatever, you're in survival.
You don't have the time to say, let me breathe, let my nervous system relax.
We don't have that privilege in survival mode.
And even if you have financial stability, but your parents are emotionally up and down constantly,
you're still going to feel like you're in survival mode emotionally.
Is it safe to be in this home? And that's kind of how I felt it was like every week there was slamming or screaming or just
Dis-ease within my parents, you know, I knew that they loved us, but they didn't love each other
Yeah, same and they tried but it was just constant friction where you're just like what's gonna happen today when I come home from school
I don't know. Yeah. Oh, oh, I rode the same bus.
It's traumatic, right?
It's so traumatic.
Very traumatic.
So, and you mentioned in the beginning
about how healing and inner growth is a lifelong journey.
And it sounds like, I don't wanna assume,
but it sounds like around 10 years ago
when you were starting your business, you were kind of in early phases of a healing journey for yourself.
Is that accurate somewhere around there?
You started to uncover things and unmask things within yourself and you went down more of
a spiritual holistic path, right?
Yes.
I would say it was a little bit longer than
that.
Sure.
More of like almost like 17, 15 years of that.
But you know, moving to New York.
So I like moved to, it was like the first time
I came here, I was like, Oh, Oh, I still feel
that way every day, every day.
It's amazing.
I've been here for 18 years and I still get this
like.
It's epic. When you walk outside and you're in the streets and just the day. It's amazing. I've been here for 18 years and I still get this. It's epic.
When you walk outside in the streets and just the
energy.
I love it.
It's incredible.
It can support or swallow you though.
Yeah.
And it sounds like it swallowed you the first few
years.
Oh my God.
I was swallowed and then spit back on.
Oh, oh, oh yeah.
What did you get caught up in in the first few years
of being in New York that really messed you up?
Well, I moved here.
I drove a U-Haul here with a friend and.
Where'd you move to in this city?
This teeny tiny little apartment on the
Upper East Side.
61st and 1st.
But still living the dream.
You're like, I'm in the city.
Oh yeah, no, I thought, but at first, like we
didn't have an apartment, I was sleeping on
someone's couch.
It was like a whole process. I didn't even have a bed. I had a mattress on the city. Oh yeah, no, I thought, but at first, like we didn't have an apartment, I was sleeping on someone's couch. It was like a whole process.
I didn't even have a bed.
I had a mattress on a floor.
It was without a, it was like half the size of this.
Living like a 22 year old, you know?
Living the dream.
You don't need much.
I didn't.
And I still like, I'm just like, how did I do it?
So whenever I start to question my ability for anything,
I'm like, girl, you can do anything.
You know, and it is that constant reminder
because like all the things come in,
imposter syndrome and all those limited beliefs.
But when I shut that door after moving away from it all
and being with myself,
honestly in a sense of peace and quiet somewhat.
In New York City.
In New York City, right?
But like, it was just away from all that chaos.
Was the first time I was like,
I felt all the waves of it.
Like it was like, definitely a panic attack, I believe,
because I think at that time,
I didn't even really know what anxiety was,
but I was like, mm-mm, nope, and like shut the door to it.
And like, that was my like running away.
That was the start of running away from myself,
running away from all the stuff that came up.
And that really, you know, translated to like
going out, drinking, drinking late.
Um, and then.
It was numbing yourself.
Binging, numbing.
Numbing yourself, yeah.
Numbing.
Were you drinking like every week or every day or?
I was definitely drinking a lot on the weekend
because I worked at the Chanel counter in
Bloomingdale's.
So I was like working, you know, really long hours on my feet.
So like the nights that I had off, I would go out and I would just like rage.
And I was a very different person when I drank.
My anger really came out.
Oh yeah.
Wow.
So your anger would come out, wasn't it?
Clubs and you would like scream at people or just be a nasty girl or what, like, what would it be like?
Yeah.
Like if someone like pissed me off, I would, like, I've always been a little
quick on the tongue, a little rough around the edges.
You'd step to them.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I was just, it was like all my inner pain would come out.
Yeah.
And then when all of that started to rise and even like dating guys like
I would get physical sometimes and that was just you know things I saw I was repeating every pattern.
And then it was you know when I would feel like it was too much and I couldn't face the pain, that was when I started binging, like heavily.
Eating.
Eating, and then I would, you know,
I also wanted to model, so it's like eating your face off
and then thinking about, well,
they want you to lose 15 pounds.
So then I started purging,
and this was something I did for a handful of years
that no one knew about.
I was really, really good.
Really?
Yeah.
So I mean.
At hiding my pain.
Really?
So purging, I mean, throwing up, what is,
it's not comfortable to do.
Oh my God.
You know, it's the worst feeling.
You feel better like 10 minutes later.
It's like, my heart hurts thinking about it.
But the only time it is good
is when you have an upset stomach. but you didn't have an upset stomach
Maybe you're eating too much, but you weren't like sick in the stomach like oh you had some weird food that you're throwing up
So what is that?
like
Psychologically when you're like, okay, I just ate too much or I just want to look skinnier and need to lose weight
But I'm numbing myself by eating because I am protecting myself.
Um, I feel ashamed of past or I feel whatever.
I'm anxious.
So I'm numbing myself by eating, but now I feel
shameful and guilty that I ate.
So I need to purge it.
It's a vicious cycle.
Really?
Yeah, it's really, and, and I felt like I
deserved it.
Deserved what?
Um, to feel that pain.
Yeah.
Because I was like putting myself through that and then it was like, you need to,
it was a lot of like getting rid of the feelings.
But I didn't know this at the time.
I was just trying to get rid of, you know, what was physically inside of me,
but it was so emotionally tied.
And through my lowest of lows of going out,
and you know, this is when I was binge drinking,
and then it was binge eating,
and then I started experimenting with some drugs. Thank God it was short-lived.
And I had my wake me up moment of just feeling
complete disgust with myself.
Really?
Yeah.
Just, I was so done.
I could no longer continue that path.
How old were you now?
This was mid twenties. I was like, it was. no longer continue that path. How old were you now?
This was mid-20s. I was like, it was-
You were here for a few years,
you were in a cycle of just like shame or beat up
and binge eating, binge drinking,
starting to try little drugs here and there
and being up till five, six a.m. at night clubs.
Oh yeah, sun coming up.
And it was just-
On my knees over the toilet.
Really?
Just disgusting.
And I mean, I remember, I remember just like
getting up looking in the mirror and being like,
I hate you.
Wow.
Like I had so much hate towards myself
and I was just, I just had like tears rolling down my face
and I was like, I don't, I don't want this anymore.
I don't want to live like this.
I can't live like this because it's going
to end badly.
I could feel it.
And I also knew carrying down that road was
like the easy way out because I was so good
at taking everything down in my path.
But like, you didn't know it, but like I was.
Like mass destruction was a skill that I
could, that I had mastered.
Really?
But you were looked good on the outside.
People are always surprised by this stuff.
And that's honestly why I share it and why I
felt I needed to because.
But you were good at hiding it though, right?
You were going to be like, okay, it's, it's
noon the next day I'm put together.
Like everything's fine, I'm happy.
Yes.
And then, you know, that moment there is
when I so vividly saw these two roads of life, right?
And this gorgeous tree in the middle,
and I just so vividly remember this moment
and it was like, you can keep going here and we know where that's going to end up.
Or you can choose to create this different path for yourself and it's going to be really
hard because it's going to be everything you don't know.
But it's like the path of waking you the f**k up. And I just remember I was like, okay, I want it, but I need help. And that was the biggest moment for me because from being a little girl who thought that
she could fix every single thing and like I carried the weight of everyone and my siblings
and I have always been the Savior and coming in and trying to do all the things and, you know, pying
my parents the house and like anything that I could do to save everyone, but I was just
not saving myself. So it was this moment of like giving over and not relying on my own strength for the first time in my freaking life.
And that was like the doors opened.
Wow.
I think we need a tissue. There's a tissue right behind you.
Sorry. Yeah, yeah.
Wow.
So you're in your mid-20s. You have, I guess, a darkness that continues for months or years until there's a moment
where you're like, okay, there's two roads I can take.
I've had a few of those moments in my life.
So I know that feeling of having to make a decision.
And you know, I grew up, when I was eight, my brother went to prison.
So every weekend for four and a half years, we would go as a family to visit, you know,
during visiting hours.
And I saw my life starting to go down that as well.
When I was 13, I had to make a decision.
And I remember saying, do I want to end up in prison? You know,
because if I keep doing these things, which were not massive at the time,
but we'll build, it'll build,
and you're going to keep getting in trouble and bad things are going to happen.
Bad things are going to happen.
And do I want to live that life and deal with that pain and shame?
And I just saw what that will, you know, and I saw all the other convicts in the, and I
got to know them and the traumas and the pain that they caused their families from bad decisions.
And it was just like, do I want that or not?
And so you had this in your mid-20s,
and you knew that you couldn't do it all on your own anymore,
and you said, I need support.
So what did you allow yourself to do after that?
I called my friend and asked for her therapist number.
I was like, I need help.
I need a therapist.
And like that was like the start, but I lied to him.
I mean, I like lied to my therapist,
I was taking Adderall, you know, I like,
I did want help, but it is really hard to break the cycle.
Sure, yeah.
And to break the patterns.
And I was lying and she would, she was strong.
She was like the mother that I always kind of like needed to anchor
me and call me out on my tough love, super tough love.
So, you know, I would come in all like adderall doubt.
And I was like buying at her.
It was just, it was like, I got rid of one thing and I was looking for the next.
So you said you wanted help, but really inside of you, you're like,
ah, I still can do this myself,
and I'm not gonna give everyone the full picture.
I think I did really want help,
but when you are so used to attaching yourself
to chaotic things, to keep moving forward,
it takes time. Well, it doesn't feel safe to be in a safe
space because you're not familiar with it. I don't even know what that. So harmony doesn't
feel safe. Right. Peace doesn't feel safe. No. Because you're like, wait. What's going to happen?
Something's about to happen. Yeah. Where's the chaos? Oh, yeah. You're always looking for it
because you're so used to it, it's familiar. So when safe isn't safe and you don't know how to feel calm in harmony, you're
always looking to recreate chaos, whether it be in a relationship or whether it be
in your own life or addictions or whatever it might be.
Oh, and I was very good at.
If the chaos wasn't there, I will bring it.
Isn't that interesting?
Oh my God, and relationships, things with friends,
like being able to really self-reflect
and see where you are just a disaster in disguise.
It is hard work.
And I will be so honest with you today,
I still to this day wake up and my first thought, first from the moment I wake my eyes after doing this work for so many years,
goes to a dark place.
Really?
Yes. But I now know how to get myself out. And it's just, it's, I think when it's so embedded in your nervous system,
it takes so much time to get yourself out of that place. And I know now, I know when I'm,
I know when I'm bringing it. I know when I'm being self-destructive.
And I'm definitely so far from that part of me,
but she's in there, let me tell you.
And I have great access to her if I need her.
But, which is also a good thing,
which I've learned to really embrace and love
and be like, you are one fiery pistol in life.
God knows if we
needed it's there and the access is quick.
But I, I'm just being honest.
I mean, you know.
What is the first thought that comes to you on a
daily basis when you wake up or on a typical day?
Where does that dark thought go to?
It's like the overwhelm.
It's just like, Oh my God.
Oh, that, you know, it's just, it's that immediate
almost like being on that wheel of anxiety, but I step off now.
And I'm like, no, no.
And this is where I've cultivated this practice and this connection with Source and knowing
that I can connect at any moment, in any time.
And that is what helps me see like the light of day.
And I, you know, I shared this once on,
I was doing a Q and A and I shared this
and it was like the most viewed thing I had.
And I realized that there is still that part of me, right?
That wants to like make things look really pretty that there is still that part of me, right,
that wants to like make things look really pretty with a bow and of course I've cracked myself open,
but there's still so much.
And I think that is where I'm at right now today
where I'm like, I am so done just like ripping off
these masks and really just being so radically transparent with myself,
but also with people who are ready
to do it for themselves too.
Because it's not just for me,
and I think that's where this work has fueled something
in me that I've always known was in there
since I was a little girl, but it's,
it's this choice every single day.
Like to this day, it's like I'm choosing, I'm choosing to stay devoted to myself.
So when you started, you know, kind of waking up
from doing destructive things
into creating a more healthy lifestyle for yourself,
15, 17 years ago. Yeah.
And you went down that journey and you started these healthy practices.
You said, okay, I'm going to reach out for support.
I'm going to find a therapist, even though I'm
still lying to my therapist.
I'm doing the steps though.
And I'm like in the work.
And then what else did you start doing to develop
a healthy practice for yourself?
Were you still nightclubs and modeling and doing these things that weren't supporting you
or were you removing yourself as well from environments?
So instead of like for me, instead of focusing on removing one thing that really
helped me when I was in it and still when I feel overwhelmed, it's like,
thing that really helped me when I was in it and still when I feel overwhelmed it's like
what can I add in to help like make me feel just an ounce more at ease and when my therapist started really calling me out on things and it was like okay I can't even lie to her like I just I
just have to be honest so it was like that was that shtick was old. I couldn't do that anymore. But then I was finding, I was feeling this like,
I need to be told, like I need to be told what to do.
So I started seeing a health coach and I remember
the first time I walked in and I was like,
okay, give me the diet.
Like that, I, I was in that mindset of like,
tell me the thing, I'll do it.
And then I'll see results. And you know, I was trying that mindset of like, tell me the thing, I'll do it, and then I'll see results.
And you know, I was trying to lose weight because I wanted to be a model.
And at this point I had gotten signed by a top
agency, but it was like, I lost like 15 pounds
and I lost 15 pounds.
And then it was just this long road of torture
because I thought that I was very into fitness
and very into wellness, but my relationship to
myself was still so disconnected that I was
looking outside of myself for all of the resources.
So I was taking what a trainer would tell me to
do, you needed to do 45 minutes of cardio and
then 45 minutes to cardio and then 45
minutes to an hour of strength training.
And I became psychotic with that.
So it was like every day, an hour of this.
And I was working out two hours a day, writing
down every morsel of food.
It was so obsessive.
It's exhausting.
It was exhausting.
It was unwellness.
There was. Did you feel like you were getting, when you looked in the mirror,
were you like, Oh, this is working though. Or are we like,
I'm still not getting the results I want.
So when I was in the height of really just,
it was like micromanaging every single thing. I did get really, really thin,
but it was unhealthy and I just looked, it was painful.
You didn't feel healthy.
No, I didn't feel healthy. And then plus when you're suffering from needing disorder,
the flip can happen too, where then I started gaining a lot of weight.
Really?
Yeah. I was like, when I was doing all the crazy workouts, hit workouts and running
myself into the ground, I was
actually at my heaviest. Really? Yes, because it was just pumping my body with cortisol.
I was so stressed out going into workouts, stressed out leaving. And that was like a big
moment in my life. I remember so vividly leaving a super popular class with a popular instructor.
And there's no shame because things work differently for people. And I think that this
is where we need to cultivate these relationships with ourselves and see what really makes you feel
in harmony with yourself. And I just remember I got off the train, 14th Street, and I was walking and I was like, I feel horrible.
How am I paying to feel worse?
What is wrong?
And I was just like, I think I'm just,
I was just searching.
And then I started meditating.
I felt this.
How old are you now, roughly?
So this was, at this point, I, it was like 12
years, 15 years ago.
I'm 41, you do the math.
20, 26, 27.
Exactly, late twenties.
And I've, you know, I still felt this, although I was slowly, it was like becoming more self-aware,
like patching things up as I was going.
But I felt that I was, I was just out here for all the answers.
Tell me and I'll do the thing.
And I was covered in cystic acne.
Really?
I had horrifying cystic pimples all over my face,
my neck, down my back.
And I did everything.
It was like I saw every dermatologist, I did
Accutane, it was just, it was awful.
And now I realize like that was my, how I
internalized my anxiety for so many years.
It was coming out in my skin.
It was the stress.
It, with a combination of products I was using and
food for sure, environment, but it was my nervous system. Like trying to like, you know, bang on my
door. And I just felt like, you know what? I've got to go in here. Like I've got to like almost, because I think when you are so dysregulated,
you don't even know what home and safety is. So there was just this feeling that I felt
I needed to, I needed to take all of that and come in here.
Wow. So you started meditating.
I started meditating. I've meditated every day since.
Wow. And that's how I'm here.
And I can tell you that for a fact.
I know that with everything inside of me
because it was the thing that helped me see myself
for the first time for like who I really was
and not any persona or facade that I had put on.
And I was really interested in wellness,
but because my relationship with myself
was still so dysfunctional,
it was the thing that helped me look in the mirror
and like find so much like deep love, like true love
for me and for my skin and loving myself through
my acne and not being at my happy weight. And it just helped me. It was like almost like just like
defogging the lens and everything got like a little bit brighter.
Wow. How much on a scale of one to 10, before this,
what was your self love scale?
10 being like you really loved yourself
from an authentic conscious place,
one being you hated yourself.
Like where were you on that scale?
I was probably like a three, four
of the work that I was doing from like a one, two.
So like I was, and that doesn't sound like progress,
but it is.
And I think that's the thing that I.
You really hated yourself before that.
I hated myself because of my actions.
Yeah.
I wasn't proud.
You're out of like alignment with yourself.
Complete, completely disaligned.
And when you can, you know, I was, it was very much
focused on the physical. And then once I realized that I could regulate from bringing some calm to
my mind, even just a little bit. Wow, then I started moving differently.
And this is when I started understanding,
no wonder why, those classes are not working for me
because they make me feel really stressed out and anxious.
And they bring out all that stuff
that I'm really working towards shifting.
And then I started blending elements of Pilates and yoga and it was like, I was just weaving
these things together, but it felt like this
like inner dance with myself, but it felt good.
Right.
And I was not punishing myself for what I ate
anymore.
And I was just literally in flow.
Like it brought me in this flow state.
And at this time I didn't even have 10,000 followers on Instagram, but I just kept just literally in flow. Like it brought me in this flow state.
And at this time, I didn't even have 10,000 followers
on Instagram, but I just felt this, like, it was like,
I have no idea how, what, where, like what you're gonna do,
but like you have to share this.
And you have to share this because you have to come back
to that seven-year-old little girl who was looking outside the window when your dad drove away when my
parents separated. And I felt like this is it. Like this is, unfortunately, like this is the car
that I've been dealt and this is my life. And I think so many people who come from broken situations or even bad marriages feel like this is it.
And it's not it.
And you can change the course of your life at any point.
Every moment is an opportunity to begin again, to do something different than you did the
day before.
That just helps you feel so deeply connected to yourself.
And, you know, I talk a lot about meditation and movement
and that is how I created a platform.
But as I'm at this point in my life today,
it's from being so connected to whatever it is you connect to.
But to me, it's the creator.
It's this higher power, so much greater than me.
And when I close my eyes and I meditate and I go in
and I bring the energy to my heart,
it's like I feel so surrounded and so safe and just
reminded that like I am being divinely guided and we all are. When we can get
ourselves to just take a moment and I mean I did it in the
morning for 20 minutes this morning. Before speaking I always like to
really really ground. So 20 minutes is like I Before speaking, I always liked to really, really ground.
So 20 minutes is like, I love that.
However, that doesn't always happen.
I am so consistent, but I'm super flexible.
You have to be, because I was crazy
with all the things before, and I'm not disciplined.
I don't even love the word.
It doesn't work for my nervous system
because it makes me feel like I'm rigid and I write things down. I need to track and I need to
how many macros and micro and I'm just like, I don't know and I don't care. But when I'm
feeling this, where I'm feeling this aliveness and this excitement for honestly, like, it's
so interesting because I feel like I've been there so much, so many deep challenges with work and just all of the things that come with being an entrepreneur.
But I am so excited for no reason. It feels so good just to be like, show me,
guide me. And through staying so deeply connected is what has just continued me on this path of
like cracking me open. Had me set up that $24 tripod I got on Amazon, setting up my phone.
I had no lights, no camera, zero editing. I mean, I literally would press play and I'd be like,
hi. And I would go and I'd run back on my mat. And then I'd be like, okay, today.
And I would just like do the thing that I did myself.
But I brought people along with me.
And then the more that I started doing it,
it was like, people were like, can you do that longer?
Like, where can I get this clip?
And you know, it was like Instagram stories
when I first came to life.
And then I just felt this.
I was like, I need a home for these humans who want the same thing.
We all want it.
We all want to be, you know, when I come back to like my why every day, I just want to wake
people up to this inner strength within themselves.
That's it.
That's what I have to do for myself every single day.
And through sharing it, it was just like, it was crazy.
I couldn't believe it.
I couldn't believe that I was connecting with people
all over the world who were like, thank you so much.
And they were writing me these letters and I'm sobbing.
And at this point I'm pregnant with my son
and also coming to this place of like I know
what it feels like to be brought up in a disconnected home and I like wanting to be so connected to it
all whether it was a little chaotic or completely you know a sense of calm. I just I wanted to be with it. And it's just been this incredible journey of what's next.
That's incredible.
The thing that I'm hearing you say, which I really love,
is that when you started to,
it sounds like your seven-year-old self
was screaming at you during your adult life
when you were doing things out of alignment
with what she wanted, right?
When you weren't protecting her,
when you weren't showing up for her,
she was screaming at you in different ways.
She was like, you know, the acne was coming out,
you're, you know, going against your body
by binge eating or binge drinking or, you know,
late nights, all these different things.
And she didn't feel safe with you as an adult
trying to take care of her
because you weren't taking care of her.
And so she felt unsafe, right?
And when you treat your inner child poorly as an adult,
bad things happen in your life.
Or you don't feel good, right?
And you're not attracting abundance,
you're not setting yourself up
to be able to manifest your vision,
you're not bringing the right relationships
in your life necessarily, and things feel off.
You feel out of alignment because you're not taking care
of the inner being inside of you that needs cared for.
And what it sounds like, I'm hearing you say, is when you said, okay, these two paths and take time to listen to the still small voice,
which is God, I think, and also your inner child.
It's almost like the voices of both combining and saying,
what does the inner child need
and what is God directing me to do?
Love, exactly.
And when you are able to meditate
for a minute or 20 minutes a day or however long you do
on a daily basis, you can hear the decisions you need to take today and you can be guided
on what you need to do in the next step.
Even though you don't know what's to come or you feel, I'm uncertain or what's the
future going to bring?
When you can listen to yourself and where you're guided, you can take action on what
is needed today.
And it sounds like you've been doing that for now 10, 15 years.
And by doing so and continuing to be in alignment with your intuition, by serving your inner
child and by serving the higher power for yourself, abundance and manifestation becomes
easy, easier.
And you just said, like, I don't even have 10,000 followers.
I just started taking these actions and doing what felt right to me and being
consistent for 10, 15 years.
And because of that consistent, um, integrated authentic actions, it's
like, ah, manifesting everything.
I'm on the cover of these magazines and this is growing and audiences and wow, these things
are just happening for me, right?
But if you were going down destructive paths,
this wouldn't be happening.
No, of course not.
And that's why I say, I know I am here because
of my practice.
Yes.
Because my practice keeps me grounded to myself.
It keeps me completely locked in with what
matters most to me.
And like the thing that matters most to me in
my life is having peaceful balance, peaceful
harmony in my life, in my workplace, in my
relationship with my family, with my friends,
with every single thing that I do.
And it's so interesting the more that I just
kind of like give over because I can be a little bossy.
Definitely bossy.
You're like my team when they're watching, they know.
No, they know, but I'm not a micromanager, but I, I am
a number eight on the Enneagram and that has really
helped me understand as an active controller.
That's why I've remained the CEO.
No matter what every single person told me that I needed to hire a CEO, I just, it never
felt 100%.
I've tried and tested a lot of things that were other people's ideas and let me tell
you, they don't work.
I hate to say it. And that's where I'm not always right, but when
something feels completely wrong or I have nothing,
do nothing.
Do nothing.
Nothing.
I'm in such a flat place right now and I feel,
oh my God.
What do you mean?
Like you're not taking on new projects or you're
not like launching new stuff or what?
I'm just, I am being and it's wild what happens.
Yes.
You re like it just, it's so interesting
because you know, there, there is this part,
like I've, I've tried things.
I've had PR, I've done all of these things.
And I, I think when your mission is so big and
you want to really spread your message as far and as wide, you try things.
And even when it feels against the grain, but I am such a sensitive,
energetic person that I've just really learned that I have to listen to that.
And when something just feels like even an ounce of force, like listen, I could
have pitched, you know, had Dylan on my team, reach out to everyone and all the pot, but I'm
like, no, that is not the way for me. It's through true authentic connections. And like, I just know
that, right? It's like we met in the way that we were meant to meet. You reached out so fluke, by the way, it was so nice.
I was like, ah, this is just like so me,
like so organic and it felt raw.
And that's when I think the most incredible things
come into your life when you're not gripping.
Or forcing.
Or forcing.
Yeah, and trusting the timing of things.
Yes.
You know, I tell my fiancee, Martha.
I love her.
She's always like,
I wish we would have met like 10 years ago.
Like we would have had such a lot,
like our life would have been so much better
and we wouldn't have been through so much pain
and relationship breakups and stuff like that.
And I'm like, I wouldn't have looked at you
the same way 10 years ago,
because I wasn't ready for you.
I wasn't ready to be in a loving, peaceful relationship. Like I wasn't have looked at you the same way 10 years ago because I wasn't ready for you. I wasn't ready to be in a loving, peaceful relationship.
Like I wasn't ready.
I would have been like, oh, you're like an attractive,
like beautiful girl who's really talented,
but you don't have enough wounds for me.
You know, it's like, you're not a project I need to like
help out or something, right?
And I wasn't attracted to that And I wasn't attracted to that.
I wasn't attracted to peace.
Oh.
So I would have created, you know, I would
have hurt you probably, you know, I'd have
probably done something wrong or I'd have
been like, eh, you know, whatever.
I just wouldn't have been ready.
That's so odd.
I said it's so true.
And I needed like, I needed to go through
my own healing journey to feel ready for
peace because I didn't have peace inside of me
still.
And so I needed to be peace before I could have peace in my environment.
And, um, and she's like, Oh, that makes sense. You know, but, uh, timing is everything.
I agree with that.
And, um, you know, until sometimes we could have breakdowns, unfortunately,
like you had a break, big breakdown when you're in the mid-20s,
then you were ready for a breakthrough, right?
And unfortunately, it wasn't sooner.
You know, we all wish it was like we had peace
and less pain and sadness and things we did poorly sooner,
but time is everything when you can trust in a higher power.
So, do you believe in God?
I do. For me, it's like it is this, it's a higher power.
Yeah.
And-
Where was your life when you weren't believing in a higher power versus where you do now?
I mean, it was disconnected.
Yeah.
There was no anchor. And there was no contentment.
Like just like feeling.
Never happy.
Oh my God, contentment is such a, oh my God.
Never good enough, right?
Never good enough, no, no, no, no.
And I mean, I relate so much to your story with Marta
who I love by the way, she's amazing.
With Noah, with Noah.
Noah, I feel like he was like a saving grace in my life
because he's so calm, he's so grounded.
He's like everything that I just was so unknown for me.
And it was a massive part of me being able
to drop into myself and to really go deep and do the work because I felt safe
with him.
And I felt this safe sense in my life that really, I think when you do have that, and
it's very important that while he brought so many elements of that, I was discovering
it within myself.
I wasn't, oh, by the way, when we first started dating, I was like, he's gonna save me.
Thank God, I need to be saved.
I thought he was gonna save me, he was gonna like,
and then he wasn't.
Really?
Yes, I remember like, he would wake up in the morning
and he was like so happy and he would like,
be so excited for his day and I hated what I was doing.
Wow.
And I was just like, how do you feel like that?
And like, how do you find your thing?
Like I was so, I was like, the grip was so tight
and I was just searching and he was like,
just try to, and I have, I still, it's hard for me to focus.
Definitely undiagnosed ADHD.
I mean, it's just, uh, it's there.
But he said, if you can just like pay attention
to like the thing that you're interested in.
And for me now, it's like, pay attention to the
thing that like lights you up and just give it a
little focus, focus a little bit on it.
And I was like, okay.
And I'm like, what does he mean? Like I'm fit modeling.
And then it was funny because during my,
like I would be fitting all day and I like
worked as a fit model for years, but I was
like making bank and it was like guaranteed
cash and then.
It's good money every day.
It was amazing money.
And I wasn't like a big model, but I was like,
I don't even care anymore.
Cause that was exhausting trying with all
these supermodels in the room anyway.
Like at least I'm making money.
You're in a room and they're like fitting
like the jeans and the shirts to you.
Yeah, exactly.
So you don't have to like be on for
photography to like be in the world stage.
Exactly.
It's actually.
Not like runway modeling.
You're just like, I get to hang out and the
designers are just like fitting to me and
yes, I'm getting good money.
I was making great money.
And I just remember like when things really kind
of turned on where, you know, I would go, I
would go to my, my fittings and maybe the tech
designer was like, ah, I'm feeling really tired.
And I'm like, well, what is the first thing?
Like, well, how do you go to bed and what is the
first thing you do when you wake up?
And then it was like, I was coaching.
I started coaching, but I loved it.
And then it was like, so when you're unhappy in a situation,
or if you don't love your job right now,
bring a little joy to the job.
You gotta dig a little deep.
And when I started doing that,
wow, first of all, the lights go on.
And I was like, I am so, I love helping people.
And I was just like a little thing. I'm like, well, take magnesium, turn the lights out and put your phone away.
And it's like, nothing's changed.
I'm still like sharing all of these things, but then I started working.
So I, I went to the Institute for Integrative Nutrition online, the online course.
And that for me was like, I didn't even wanna do it because I hated school
and I was like, oh God, you have to take tests
and they're like, let's open book tests,
but I'm, or, you know, and I'm still was like,
oh my God, just the idea of taking a test
gives me severe anxiety.
But I was like, you know what,
I'm gonna challenge myself.
And I remember Noah saying, let me get it for you.
Let me pay for the course.
And I said, no, thank you,
but I have to do it for myself. If I let you pay, I'm just gonna I said, no, thank you. But I have to do it for myself.
If I let you pay, I'm just going to be
like, oh, whatever.
I knew that.
So I was like, I have to earn this.
You need to invest in it.
I needed to invest.
So doing that.
And then I started coaching people for free.
I, you know, I would meet them in coffee shops
and then, and then I, I was, I like pitched myself
to this integrative doctor.
He'd never worked with health coaches before.
He hired me.
I was the first health coach he ever hired.
Dr. Morrison, big shout out to you.
Thanks for believing in me.
And now he, you know, they have health coaches
in their practice, but it was like listening to that,
like the focus for me really helped me understand that like, okay, I
couldn't leave my job because I was making
great money, but on the evening, maybe like a
couple evenings a week, I put dedicated a little
time and then the evenings became weekends and
then the weekend became, and then I had people
wanting to pay me and then I was getting all these
offers and that was really it. Like that was when I was like, I think
I can literally do this.
Live off this.
And I started coaching full time and I loved it.
But I knew there was something missing and I'm
in that place right now and it's so fun.
What was missing?
I felt like I loved talking through, but when I
started blending movement,
it like, I became alive.
Yes.
And that was how I started teaching digitally.
And I never, I'm not a trainer.
I never started teaching in studio.
I started teaching online.
And then, you know, I feel like even after all of these years of doing this and
the love, I love what I do.
years of doing this and I love, I love what I do.
I am so grateful and so proud of myself that I'm like, you did it and you're still doing it and
you're going to keep doing it because the
unfolding is what I've learned to really just
get excited about, right?
And I love speaking and I love being able to
spread this, but also to help people apply their lives
and their mess and their stuff
to really get them there,
to like, hold, you know, it's like hand holding
and guiding along the way that I feel like
is something that I love to do,
but there's something that happens when I'm on stage
or speaking where I feel at home. Wow, that's beautiful
Something you said, you know, it's really interesting
because there's a lot of people that are struggling or suffering or in depression or anxiety and
What I have learned over the years that the fastest way to end your own sadness and suffering is to be in service to someone else
And like you said you were maybe a little down or whatever and you started coaching people just like for fun for 10, 20 minutes.
And it just made you feel alive.
When you're in service to someone else, helping provide value to someone else,
it's the greatest gift you can give yourself too.
It's almost selfish because of how good you can feel to help another person.
That's how I feel with the work that I do.
Like I'm just like...
You're amplifying it too. Yeah.
So it's like, you're helping millions and you're like, man, what a gift.
Like this is so beautiful that I get to be of service and use my pain or my
sadness for so long and what I learned on how to get out of it to help other
women who are struggling in whatever they're struggling with.
And if people watching or listening just knew that, like, if you're suffering in
any way and sadness right now
The fastest way to overcome that is to get out of yourself and start helping someone else
Helping someone with whatever you can help them with I don't care listen to them
If you have no skill just listen to them and sit with them if you can provide value in some way provide value for free
Whatever it is. It's gonna make you feel. And the more you do it consistently, it's
going to get you out of that sadness and
suffering and just not going to solve
everything, but it's going to help you a lot.
It really does.
And I think also like moving your body, like
it's wild what movement can do.
I think it's just like, it's, it brings magic
to your life because all the, you life because all those endorphins and
there's dopamine and the serotonin and you're just like and I think that just becomes a
magnet.
100%.
So bringing, it opens up the energy.
Yeah.
If you can meditate on a consistent basis and calm your mind. If you can move your breath and be intentional for
a few minutes a day with your breathing, whether that's with movement or not, and then if you
can use movement on a daily basis in some intuitive way, you're 90% of the way there.
That's my medicine.
That's it. And if you can start just eating a little bit more intuitively, a little healthier,
it's going to solve a lot of problems.
Oh my God.
A lot.
You're just going to feel better.
You're just going to feel better.
You're going to be clearer.
You're going to be happier, more joyful, more loving, more grateful.
And it's not going to solve everything, but it's going to solve a lot.
It is.
And I think people are waiting to feel motivated.
And if, let me tell you, I'm a super motivated person.
I don't always feel motivated to do the things.
So when I'm feeling that way, like I lean on my habits.
It's like your habits are the vehicle
that are gonna inspire and turn on this motivation
inside of you.
Then you become more motivated to keep it moving.
But like if you're sitting around waiting to be motivated or inspired, like we have to,
we have, we have to know that we're the
creators of that.
And it's like coming back to the things,
unfortunately, that you may not want to do in
that moment.
Like I don't wake up like skipping to meditate
and work out every day.
And by the way, I do it for like 30 minutes,
but I'm consistent and I've devoted to myself daily.
That's great.
And that's where it's like less of this
like pounding into the ground.
And it becomes-
Beating yourself up and extremism.
Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah.
But how do you stay consistent
when you've got a big business now,
you're a mom, a couple of kids, you're married,
you've got responsibilities as a wife,
you've got extended family, I'm assuming, that have stuff coming up all the time, you've got friends, you're married, you've got responsibilities as a wife, you've got extended family, I'm
assuming, that have stuff coming up all the time. You've got friends, you've got... How
do you do it? How can you stay fit, healthy, calm? How do you manage it all?
It's even more reason for me to stay consistent. And I know what it feels like to feel bad.
And I know what it feels like to live life feeling like that.
And I don't want to.
And even on my most down days,
and some days I do think you just have to let yourself
be in that and to feel all the feels, cry,
say the, really get it out because it's got, you
have to release it. But I, I still do the work. I still come back to it because it has me here.
It has me living a life beyond my wildest dreams. And I never thought things were possible. And I now know that anything is possible.
I really truly with everything inside of me believe that when you want it. And when you,
it's not even working hard for it. I think you have to work super consistently. But when you're just willing to feel all the feelings to, you know, it's, I always say it's like the days that you don't want to do it, that you need it most, that will completely elevate your process.
Yes.
And it's just like I, after all of these years, and I still have these, you know, I have such a deep relationship with my inner self and it's like these internal conversations
that I have and I get myself there.
And I do, I do and I just,
I wanna live this life to the fullest.
You said though earlier that like,
you're in a place that's kind of an interesting place
right now, you said, I don't know if you said flat
or neutral or.
Yeah, neutral.
What are you uncovering right now?
Like in the last decade, you've really uncovered a lot
and grown a lot and created a lot, right?
And where are you now?
You mentioned earlier also like
you're still doing even deeper unmasking
and letting go of past wounds on a deeper level.
Does that mean you're, what does that mean?
With your business and, with your business
and also with your personal journey inside?
So right now I am, I'm doing some energy work
and it's funny because I feel like
since I've been doing this work,
I've kind of shifted away from other things.
Like I love therapy and I think
therapy is a great tool, but this has been something very transformative for me to understand
that like we're all energy. And I, it's like, I'm just like vibrating energy and I can feel
people's energy and it's just something that magnifies my life.
So the more that I'm just really paying attention
to the energy that I hold around me,
and it's really hard
because I went like this with my business, right?
Like when I really hit that peak growth
and then it's like, okay, like what are we doing?
Keep expanding and building, create, let's launch this.
Exactly, and hire more people
and test and try all of these things.
And it got away from me.
It got a little too far away from me.
And I was so unhappy.
And I've been feeling it for a while, but it's overwhelming.
And then it's so easy to be like, oh, well, this person,
oh, well, if we didn't do that, make that decision.
And I was doing this, listening to other people.
And I've actually never talked about this,
but a couple years ago, I brought in some investment,
just with a small group of people,
and it was really not completely locked in to my gut.
But it was a guided decision that I felt from people who are very intelligent.
I was like, you know what, like this.
Yeah, of course.
And I also have stood behind for so many years, like, oh, well, school wasn't my thing and
no finances and my thing. Enough of that.
Like it is so easy to hide behind
and just think you can just like hire things.
And I do believe that you have to really give
the majority of your energy to the thing
that you're really, really good at.
But I had to really face this feeling of like,
why am I so uninspired?
I had nothing.
I was just like, it was all,
it was just like putting on an act and I could do that.
When was this?
It's been going on for a year,
but it was like chipping away at kind of understanding
maybe in certain rooms, the vibes weren't vibing.
And I'm just like walking away and I'm like, huh.
Why am I doing this?
Well, yeah, and I'm just like, why wasn't it vibing?
Who contributed to the vibes being off?
And like, I had to go under the hood of my business
and own that the disease was like, I had to go under the hood of my business and own that the decisions that were made
were my decisions.
At the end of the day, you said yes.
This is because of things I have chosen to say yes to.
Whether I felt it or not, I did it.
So owning that is when I was just like,
and I pulled up the sleeves and I'm like,
and let's get to work because nobody can fix this but me.
And it was just a lot of deep,
like for me, it starts with intuition and energy,
but then it has to be supported by aligned actions.
So you feel the thing, you take note, you kind of investigate.
And then it's like, you, you have to ask questions.
And, and sometimes there's just certain people that are not meant to be in your
orbit and that's okay, because I think when something's not working for you,
it's not working for them either.
Sure.
Of course.
So you're pulling the plug, you know, or they're pulling the plug by the way.
And it's amazing what was kind of starting to happen and shift.
And I had built this beautiful space.
This like, you know, I started doing this stuff in my living room.
Noah, when, you know, he was like, it's so funny because he's like, you know,
you were doing this thing and I was like, so happy for you that you were like
content doing this thing, but then it's like, when he started paying attention, he's like, you're like,
you have a real business.
He was really cute and funny and he was always supportive, but he's just like,
whoa, like this is crazy.
And then I, he literally built a custom desk in our living room and I had.
Me and two other girls on the team. So, you know, I went from that
and then I went to like this WeWork space
that was a closet with three desks.
And now I've built this beautiful space
with a studio in the office.
Incredible.
But I didn't feel good being there.
Really?
No.
I didn't know why.
And I had to uncover, and I had to ask hard questions,
and then I had to face things.
But through the process of listening and taking action,
and other people sometimes taking action,
I am in a different space in my life right now
where I feel like I've like just cleaned up some cobwebs
and made some really hard decisions
of also buying my investors back.
They're amazing, the most incredible group
and it was nothing to do with them.
It was just the simple fact that something was not
completely feeling in the flow for me.
And I think I put on my own pressure of feeling like
I've got to deliver this thing,
but also understanding that I think people, you know,
make it sound like the North Star
should be selling your business.
And I just, the more I kind of sat on-
Raising money, selling the business.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I was like, oh my God.
Hiring more and more people.
I was just like, I love this, I love what I, I love this.
I don't think that's, I don't think that's it.
And just being really honest and transparent
and has helped me to just really come back to myself.
Wow.
That's beautiful.
Yeah, more is not always more.
No, it's not.
And I think testing and by the way,
because I think it's so easy to think about all
the money and the things, oh God, the time.
And I wait on that for a bit, be honest.
But then I'm like, thank you.
Thank you for, for showing me, for guiding me,
for allowing me to really own this
and to just know that those were my lessons
and I had to do, I had to go through all of these things
to be at this neutral chapter,
which I like highs when they're high
and I even can vibe with a low when it's low
because it's just like, I'm used to this. But you're not used to this.
No, but I'm, oh my God, it's so beautiful.
Yeah.
And I'm just like.
You don't know what to expect next.
Is that what it is or you're not clear yet?
I know that I want to do more motivational speaking.
I'm a motivational speaker and just saying that more,
I'm like, Melissa, you are a motivational speaker.
Stop saying you want to be, you are a motiva-
And I just, even that, like exercising that skill
in the way that I talk about it and getting,
getting myself out there to do more things.
And I feel really excited without knowing a damn
thing that's about to come.
Wow.
So what does that look like if you had a vision for your life over the next few years?
What does that feeling or experience look like?
Honestly it all comes back to my community because it is, oh my God. I mean, and how this came to be is I did my first like really big class in
Brooklyn at the One Hotel years ago.
Like a live class.
Yeah, like an in-person class where I, you know, we did a meditation and I guided a class,
but it was the speaking part that I walked away from that experience. And by the way, it was so crazy because I stayed at the one hotel the night before
because I was like, I need to just like get grounded.
And sometimes when your kids are crying, you know, I was just like, give me a moment.
This is my first big thing with 300 ish people that I had ever done.
And I was in the room and I, I like thought people were like screaming on the street.
But then I looked out the window and I was like,
oh my God, oh my God, I think they're lined up.
Wow.
And I started to panic because I was like,
are people gonna come?
Are you sure they are SVP?
It was so weird.
I started feeling like no one was gonna come.
I know that feeling.
Oh my God.
And then I didn't prepare the damn thing.
You'd been preparing for 10 years.
Exactly.
You know, you've been doing reps.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And honestly, that is my inner genius that I can
drop in.
I'm so connected to source and that just flows
through me.
I've never, like, I don't plan a class.
I don't plan a meditation and I didn't plan a talk,
but it poured out of me.
Wow, that's cool.
And I went home and I remember I was like laying in bed.
My legs are up the wall as they are every night before bed
and I was talking to Noah and I said,
I feel the most like at home.
And I just feel that's what happened to me today
is what I meant to be doing.
You felt alive.
Yes, I felt so alive.
When's the last time you did one of those?
So that's where things get interesting, right?
Because I've done some, I have done some,
but I
can really hide behind teaching a class because it's safe and it's known.
Versus what?
Versus just getting up there and speaking.
Oh, so it was, so you've been doing more class
teaching.
Well, like it kind of blends.
It's like a motive, you know, a meditation and
then we move and then we, and by the way,
that is beautiful and I love doing it, but I just,
like every time I'm speaking.
Just speaking.
Just speaking.
Not doing a class.
And by the way, people like our members,
my members come to me like, sure, I can give,
I can put you through a killer workout, a workout that you,
you know, a lot of people are strong.
This is, it's different because it's mostly using
your own body weight and just like the blend of that
alone combined with the way I kind of, you know,
will fuse things together.
But people come to me for, for, for the, it's like
what I give in my energy and feeling motivated, right?
Like, because that starts to pour through me when I'm teaching.
And I feel that in my soul.
Like that's what they really want.
They want all of it.
All the things.
Right, right.
But it's a feeling more than...
It's a feeling.
They get a workout anywhere.
Yeah, they can work out anywhere, and they do.
But they get a feeling and something's unique with you
that they want more of.
Yes, and I'm really, I'm stepping into that.
So does that, I mean, okay, I'm trying to understand, though.
So you like doing classes,
but that's not the main thing you want to be doing?
I feel like it was, I love teaching digitally.
Yes.
Like I am, I- Not in-person classes. I mean, I'll do it, I love it was, I love teaching digitally. Like I am, I.
Not in-person classes.
I mean, I'll do it.
I love it occasionally, but like, I'm not going
to teach every week in a studio where like train
clients, like that is not my soul's work.
So what is the vision then for your soul's work?
Is it to speak on stage for this next season of
life and not teaching a workshop or a class,
just speaking.
So it's a combination of both.
And I'm, I'm really.
What does the perfect speech look like for you where you feel most alive?
I, it's starting with my keynote.
Okay.
I'm like really giving like the story and
the how I have gotten to this place.
But then it's taking that and it is giving the
how-to to everyone in the space.
Like with a class example or more of like,
okay, so no class, no workout.
No class, a meditation, definitely a meditation.
Maybe we'll get up and we'll do something.
Shake it off, but not like laying down on the
mat and doing a workout.
Okay.
So it's not a workout speech.
It's not a workout.
It's a speech, speech. It's a real. Okay. So it's not a workout. It's not a workout. It's a speech speech.
It's a real.
Okay.
So when's the last time you did one of those?
So the last time I did that was I was invited
to, where did I see, where did I speak?
I went to Austin and Snapchat had me come for,
what is it?
Why am I drawing a blank on the.
South by Southwest.
South by Southwest, thank you.
Like it was huge for me to have them come.
And.
How was that?
It was incredible.
It was amazing.
But that was like five months ago.
I know.
Thank you.
Look at this.
I love this.
So what are you waiting to do in the next one?
I'm, we're, I'm doing one in the beginning.
And in Q1, we'm doing one in the beginning.
In Q1, we're looking at booking the space right now.
I'm actively working towards getting this thing together, but there's nothing standing in the way.
It's more now, I know that I've taken a lot of this space to like get myself and I've done a lot
of talks in between too.
Like I did one last Friday, I'm doing one next
week and you know, room of 70 people, a hundred
people, I've spoken to 500, 500 plus.
So I've been grooming this, but this one I'm
putting on.
This is my event.
Yeah.
In early next year.
And as you know, that takes, I mean, it's a lot of work.
So we've been chipping away at this for a while,
but I can very confidently say in 2025.
It's happening.
It's freaking happening.
Like cannot, I really can't wait.
And when I, even can't wait and when I
Even like last Friday when I spoke to these seven new women I was like I am so
Like I'm the most me I've ever been
Okay, so you feel the most alive when you're doing this I do I can see it in your energy I know I shifted. I felt it. But you've only done a couple of them this year,
it sounds like, right?
No, I've done more than a couple.
Okay.
I've done, I've done a lot.
Yeah, I've done a lot,
but they're very much like I'm being invited.
Sure.
But I wanted to use this time to like exercise my skill.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.
I mean, why don't you just do it at your office space
like once every week or every two weeks?
Like just let women come in and be like, you know,
100% event and just get your reps.
Yeah.
It doesn't have to be a big production.
Yeah, no, it doesn't.
Where like, oh, we have to plan six months in advance
to have like a vent. It doesn't, but I feel like I really,
my energy vibrates, like I feel very called to, like the space
we're looking at is a thousand people.
Like I just, I've done the 500s, I've done a little more,
but I feel like I'm just.
You wanna do a bigger thing now.
Yeah, and I have been, I mean, the thing is with,
and I love how you're going with this, call me out.
Yeah, yeah, I am.
No, I like it, thank you.
Because it's also, I have to face that.
I have, and this is something,
I had to ask myself, am I procrastinating?
This is when I started working with this energy worker.
Doesn't need to look too perfect.
Yeah, and I was like, am I procrastinating?
And it was so clear, and this is when I really got to work.
It's been about four months of this.
I had so much detangling to do.
And it's not an excuse.
No, I hear you though.
But when you're so detangled.
It's hard to give your energy to something.
You can't.
And now as things are all starting to open up,
it's like I'm opening up.
Sure, sure, sure.
Time uses everything.
It's everything.
I was talking with Gabby Bernstein last night.
We were talking about you.
She's the best.
Love tabs.
And talking about how she's loved watching your journey
and just how you've exploded.
But she did something for years, I think.
I remember it was a year where it was like once a month.
There was like a beautiful church in New York City
that she would just open it.
Oh, I used to go.
Did you?
Yeah.
So there's gotta be something like that
where also it doesn't have to be a big production.
It can just be like, I wanna do this once a month
for 300 or 500 or however many people,
where it's like a 90 minute thing
and I'm just gonna get my practice reps here in New York
for the bigger thing that I'm gonna build later.
And it's content for the app and it's whatever.
You can invite your friends, you can bring other people,
whatever it might be and just whoever shows shows.
If it's a hundred people, if it's a thousand people,
but I'm gonna bring my best once a month.
And I'm gonna get a rep every month
and I'm gonna create something for myself
and I'm also gonna have content for the whole month and I'm going to have more videos to show other big
events, what I'm doing in front of, like, it's just got to activate it.
I love that.
You know what I mean?
I felt a very strong yes when you said that.
Like it can, it doesn't have to be produced, overproduced, but it could be a beautiful
church.
It could be, I don't know where Gabby did it, but it always looked, oh, it's pretty
beautiful.
Yeah.
She, I've been to like one that she did at a church and then I. It could be, I don't know whether Gabby did it, but it always looked, oh, it's pretty beautiful.
Yeah, I've been to one that she did at a church
and then I would go to Marianne Williamson
who was also one of her teachers.
She did weekly.
Oh, I went weekly for a long time.
So you could do something like that.
Yes.
It could be once a month to start.
I love it, this is great.
No, I'm really liking this.
And what I've really been peeling back the layers on
is clearly perfection.
Can you tell?
If I were you, I would say,
you should give yourself a challenge
to make it feel a little scary.
And I wouldn't wait till next year,
I would say, how do I do this in November or December?
And it's like, how do I do this before the end of the year
where I don't feel fully prepared,
where it scares me a little bit
because I feel like I want it to be this produced,
perfect thing and just show up
and give my heart and soul to my community.
I love it.
And that's when I'm my best by the way,
when it's less produced, which is what I've gone back to.
The mic and you on stage.
Yeah. And put a little The mic and you on stage. Yeah.
Put a little music on and that's it.
And you deliver, you know?
So I mean the holidays are coming up.
It's like perfect time, November, December to like just put something together and see
who shows up.
You know, it's scary when you don't know how many people are going to show up.
I just had an event a few weeks ago and I was literally like, I have no idea. It was a 6,000 person venue and I go, I don't know if people people are gonna show up. I just had an event a few weeks ago, and I was literally like, I have no idea. It was a 6,000 person venue, and I go,
I don't know if people are gonna show up or not.
We're gonna have 1,000 people here,
and it's gonna look empty.
Until people are there, you're like, oh, okay,
this thing is full, but it's a little scary.
It's really scary.
And I've been doing it for eight years.
It's like, so I don't know.
Something, what I'm hearing you say is like,
you just being able to show up
and hundreds of people coming
and you being able to deliver.
And the joy that brings you like,
and the memory that gives you at night afterwards
and how you get to talk about it
and how you get to relive it,
that memory dividend sounds like
it's one of the greatest joys you have.
It is.
When you're on stage speaking.
And so don't limit yourself on your ability to serve
until the perfect timing or the perfect space
or the perfect, I have to detangle everything.
I get the detangling, but it's like,
you can keep getting practice reps locally
in a smaller venue, you know.
Thank you.
I needed to hear that.
Yeah, and your community wants you, right?
You're doing a disservice by not adding a space
for them to show up.
You're freaking right.
They're messaging you saying, we want more of you,
and this is the thing you wanna do more of.
It's not like you're wanting to do something
that you don't wanna do.
It's not like your audience is asking you to do
like a mastermind or a coaching program or another course,
where you're like, I'm just tired of creating more. They're asking you to do like a mastermind or a coaching programmer, another course, you're like, I'm just tired of creating more.
They're asking you to do something
that your heart is telling you you love the most,
based on what I'm hearing you say.
A million percent.
Thank you, I needed this.
Yeah, I would set a date in November, December.
Okay.
And say, I'm just gonna get a venue
that I can just do a two hour talk.
That's the thing, I'm just like,
I don't know, just like a walk in.
Walk in.
Do the thing.
That's it.
No production.
Yes.
Mic and some music.
I like less production.
That's been a big thing.
And you can keep doing the thousand person
venue later next year.
You can set that and create that, but this
is where your heart and your soul comes alive
and where you can serve your community.
It doesn't need to do Gabby Burns, the Marion
Williams style, you know, it's like serve.
Thank you.
I really needed.
I'm going to text you and see next week if you've
got a date.
Done.
No, I feel like as soon as you said it, and I
think this is where, you know, with my team right
now, I feel like I've really
just been coming back to the basics of like, what brings me alive?
Like I actually went back to doing my lives on my phone with no, like we have lights in
there, but it's like dark and it's not perfect.
It's not fancy.
Oh my God.
It's like, it's when I'm the most me.
I mean, you should even consider going back and just make it look like your living room.
Maybe you don't wanna film in your living room anymore,
but make it, set it up like your living room.
I do still film in my living room.
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah, I will never stop doing it.
At home?
Yes.
There you go.
Yeah, I bring it with me everywhere.
That's amazing, amazing.
Yeah, I would love to see you on a stage in New York,
like just a church or some venue,
like get what Gabby did.
You gave me a gift.
Like it could be once a month, it doesn't have to be weekly.
And just see how that feels.
Okay.
And book it, only book it one month ahead.
If you don't wanna do it next month,
I don't have to do it anymore.
If it's getting too overwhelming
or it doesn't feel right, I'm stopping, you know.
Team, get ready.
Yeah, yeah, it's not, it doesn't be some big produce thing.
I'm calling right after this.
And that's the feeder for like, oh, we're
going to do a thousand or 2000 person venue
next year.
And this is like, you can sell tickets to
that at your monthly thing.
Yeah.
I feel like I've been standing in my own way.
And honestly, it's so interesting because I
think you can be really excited about something
and at the same time so scared.
I was really stepping in.
And I will admit that.
Yeah, of course.
But you're here for a reason today.
You gave me a, it was like an electric listen and yes.
Well, just you talking about it,
and this is what you're most alive is what you're saying.
And I'm feeling that and I'm like,
why have you only done it a few times this year. You know, it's like,
do it once a month, you know.
Okay.
On your own here in New York.
Yeah.
This has been beautiful. I've got a couple final questions for you, but
what I'm hearing you say throughout this entire conversation is that when you
give yourself the space and time
to start
listening to the direction of your life.
And am I in the direction that I want to be in or am I not?
Based on how I'm feeling, based on my environment, based on the people in my life, am I on the direction, am I on the path?
And do I feel good about me?
Do I have a good relationship with me?
When you've been able to do that consistently,
good things happen in your life.
When you keep taking consistent, healthy actions
on a daily basis.
More abundance comes to you,
you're manifesting the right things,
organically things flow to you better,
and it feels more effortless.
When you're making decisions that are not in alignment with your inner child or with the divine,
it's a lot of effort and things don't flow to you.
And there's a lot of destruction and sadness
and suffering in your path.
And so I want to acknowledge you, Melissa,
for the journey you continue to take
to be in service to the little girl inside of you,
to be there for her.
Even when she's maybe screaming
at times and you're doing not everything perfect
all the time, but you keep realigning with the values
you have that she needs.
I know you have kids, but the most important child
you have is the one with yourself.
And so I acknowledge you for being on that journey
to being a great mother to yourself,
as well as your own kids,
and being of service,
using your soul to be of service to your community.
And I acknowledge you for making the actions
in your business recently to realign with that,
even though that might be scary
and worried what people are gonna think about me
and what I'm gonna upset some people
and these different things,
but more is not always more.
And so I acknowledge you for taking these
challenging courageous steps.
Um, and I'm, I'm so excited that we're connecting
and I hope to see you continue to be in your
power without it being perfect.
Oh, yes.
Um, I've got two final questions for you, Melissa, before I ask them, how can people who are
listening or watching be of service to you today?
Where can we support and follow you and serve you?
Thank you.
I just, I'm like so full of gratitude.
It's such a beautiful thing when you can
like really take it in.
You can come to melissawoodhealth.com and I
have workouts and meditations and I have it's such a beautiful thing when you can like really take it in. You can come to melissawoodhealth.com
and I have workouts and meditations. I have over a thousand videos and I really truly have something
for everyone that was always important to me no matter what stage of life you are in, whether you
are pregnant, newly postpartum, have never worked out, have taken years off. And with these workouts and the
programs that I've created, I feel very confident that it will guide you to a place of true inner
alignment with yourself. And meditations, I have recipes. I really share so much. I try to give it all there. And our Instagram for Melissa Wood Health
is at Melissa Wood Health.
And my personal is at Melissa Wood Tepperberg.
Awesome, okay.
We'll make sure to check that out.
And if you're in New York, make sure to follow her
to see when she's doing her event here in New York
at the end of this year, hopefully.
No pressure, but only if it fills a line for you.
It does.
Yeah, yeah.
You lit a fire, I love it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't want you to feel like I have to do this,
but it's like, if you feel called,
the end of this year, it's happening.
This is a question I ask everyone
towards the end of our conversations.
It's called the three truths.
So imagine a hypothetical scenario.
You get to live as long as you want in this world,
but it's your last day on this earth.
So imagine you're as old as you want to be.
And from this moment of this conversation until that last day, you get to create
everything you want in your life.
Um, whether you want to create more or less, whatever it is, you get to develop
and create anything and all your dreams come true, everything comes true.
But for whatever reason, in this hypothetical scenario,
you have to take all of your work with you,
all of your content, the videos, this conversation,
anything you create.
We don't have access in this world
after you're gone, hypothetically.
But on the last day, you get to leave behind three truths.
Three things you know to be true
from all your experiences in life.
Kind of like your three lessons to life. And this is all we have to remember of your content.
What would be those three truths for you?
Oh, God, this is so good.
The three truths for me would be to listen to your gut,
because it's guiding you in ways and directions
beyond anything you ever could have imagined.
Open your heart, because when you do,
it opens the doors to everything in your life.
And the third would be to be exactly who you are.
And no matter what's going on around you,
and people are doing things you want to do and they're you think they're doing it better, the more that you can just come back to you and move through life in the way that you do is where I think the beauty of us really unfolds.
That's beautiful.
Final question was, so what's your definition of greatness?
My definition of greatness is having this contentment and alignment in your life,
no matter what it looks like,
because I think when you peel all of that stuff back,
it's this feeling that you wake up with
and you just feel so good and excited for it all.
Like that to me is just what living a great life is
and being a great person and just showing up
with this greatness through it all.
Hmm. Awesome. Melissa, thanks for being here.
Appreciate it.
Thank you so much.
Amazing.
It's amazing.
Anything you wanted to add or anything, you know?
Oh my God, I feel like we went there in every way,
shape and form.
And it's so interesting too,
because I feel like I told my story so differently.
And I love what you pulled out of me.
That's great, that's great.
It's beautiful.
Thank you. Appreciate it.
Thank you.
I hope you enjoyed today's episode
and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness.
Make sure to check out the show notes in the description
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has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go
out there and do something great.