The School of Greatness - Manifest Abundance By Eliminating THIS From Your Relationships EP 1352

Episode Date: November 23, 2022

Steve Young is a Pro Football Hall of Famer and former San Francisco 49ers quarterback who is now a NFL analyst for ESPN. Steve co-authored the New York Times best-selling book, QB: My Life Behind the Spiral and has just written and published his latest book The Law of Love. A former Super Bowl MVP, Young retired after 15 NFL seasons in 1999. As a collegian, Steve Young, the great-great-great grandson of Brigham Young, was a consensus All-American and a Heisman Trophy runner-up at Brigham Young University in 1982. In this episode you will learn,Why you should be less transactional in your relationships.To find abundance even in a losing place.Why becoming a good parent starts by challenging your insecurities.How you can get started on your healing journey.For more, go to lewishowes.com/1352Inky Johnson on Hacking Your Mindset To Overcome Life's Challenges: https://link.chtbl.com/1279-podTerry Crews On Overcoming Toxic Toughness & Finding True Power: https://link.chtbl.com/1258-podJay Glazer on How To Make Vulnerability Your Greatest Strength: https://link.chtbl.com/1253-pod

That's all we really are is a series of relationships. Life's most important aspects all happen in those relationships. And so how do we see them? The only way is if we... Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. And each week we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner

greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today. Now let the class begin. Do you remember your first coach that gave you a lesson that helped you develop the mindset that you still have today and what was that well it's my father and he was always his nickname is grit yes and he means it like it's like he's a in fact a famous book grit was written not too long yeah he was in there really Angela reader but I read about him and said I go to interview him and and so there's a chapter on grit young you know that's cool and so he but he means in a really balanced way because a lot of times someone has a someone has a dream or and that becomes myopic and that's all your life is and then that

what there's no athleticism in it right and I think one of the greatest qualities that I love in people is someone who's superior talent but is not afraid to it doesn't just make that a I just play one note on the piano like I can do more than and so my dad was gritty as I look back you know he was tough and he was strong-, but he was also in a way, and I'll say loving, I don't think he would call it love, but he would, but so he would always say, uh, find what you love to do, but then you can't quit. So to him, you don't, I'm not for, you don't have to do it. I'm not telling you what to do, but once you choose something, and so as a young kid, I remember we were in baseball

and it was a baseball, basketball, football town. That's like where I, you know, the mean streets of Greenwich, Connecticut, people laugh about that, but that's what my friends did. We played those sports. And so I was in little league, I don't remember what it was, and the practices were too long

and it was something frustrating. And I'm like, dad, I don't wanna do it was, and the practices were too long, and it was something frustrating. And I'm like, Dad, I don't want to do it anymore. And that's when he's like, oh, no. No, no, no, you forgot what I told you. You can choose what you want to do, but you chose it. Now you're in, and you finish it. And so as a young kid, that was like religion. That was just, that's how it worked. And so when i wanted to quit

college football my freshman year because they were eighth string no one cared about me and i was doing the scout team for the defense and they were abusing me and knowing the coaches into my name you know and i remember and i was gonna i could have gone to north carolina and started why didn't i do that let me go i told him i wanted to quit and come home and he said the same thing again really he's like look you can quit but you can't come home because I'm not I'm not living with you Wow And I and he was serious like in other words. I didn't have another place to go So I stayed if he would have said you're right. They're screwing with you. They're not respecting you. Let's come home We'll figure it out. I would have gone home and what would have happened?

Not what happened you wouldn't have happened not what happened you wouldn't be here not what happened Wow and so I think in many ways but I appreciate because a lot of parents want to tell you what to do they have the dream for you it's there it's their dream it's not your dream and that's why I always say be very careful as a parent that my oldest is a music theater major Didn't really like sports. I wanted him to enjoy I I did want him to experience sports Because there's there's a sort of reality Lessons to it so and so we did that but he clearly wanted to do we want to go perform

And now that he's performing on on stage we have so much in common you know that i didn't really think about me as a performer and so so much of the anxieties of performance and so we are went full circle like it seemed like he was going as far away from me as possible and now we're back kind of doing the same business in the same way show business in a way so i always looked at myself as an artist on the field yeah improvising and expressing myself yeah you know you have set plays but it's like it never goes exactly the way you want to go right that to its farthest leg because i had the legs to do it yeah and that's why i'm so grateful i was with peyton

manning yesterday and so peyton and i played the same position for a long time 18 years and i think he played 19. But we did it completely different because our talent level, I mean, he couldn't move as much as I could. And so he honed with his talent, and I just honor Peyton Manning, like amazing what he did on the field. I don't know how you would ever play quarterback in the NFL with what you have to go through and say to yourself, I'm going to do it from one spot. It's crazy. I'd be like, no. Especially today. No, no, no.

No, no, no. I'm not doing that job. So the fact that we did the same job but did it so differently, there's an honor. And I just, I'm so grateful for the ability to have expressed it more, you know, physically. Yes. Out in its outer reaches. it was fun for me but I mean going in as eighth string how did you stay true to yourself obviously your dad didn't give you a backup plan from there but how did you overcome one person at a time until you became a starter so and I think this was you know come back from my dad, but well, you know,

there's a funny story. My mom, when I was really little playing eight year old football, I got tackled, got the wind knocked out of me. I'm laying on the ground. I can't breathe. I thought I was going to die. My dad came running out. You know, you lay on your back and you pull your pants up and let you breathe.

And you're like, oh, I feel better. I feel better. My mom starts out and she almost steps on me as she heads for the kid who tackled me. Don't you, grabs him by the shoulder. Oh my gosh. Don't you ever hit my son. That was late. That was illegal. You know and I'm like. In the middle of the game? Yeah. Mom. Oh my god. Get out. What are you doing? Like get out. So maybe it's my mom. I don't know where this comes from but I when I started the eighth string to your point I was running scout team for the defense. And so I started the eighth string, to your point, I was running

the scout team for the defense. And so I was, for BYU, I was playing Wyoming, I was playing University of Utah, I was playing San Diego State.

And so every week, I would be there. You're running their place. I was running the place for the other team. And it was the wishbone or whatever else. And I said,

you know what? I'm going to be the greatest. I'm going to be, when they play Wyoming and the defense comes back from the game, I want them to say, you know what?

That kid that was doing scout team was better than the Wyoming quarterback. Wow. That's cool. That was in my mind. So, and that's how I attacked it because there was something to be done. Even though no one cared, no one's paying attention, no one knew my name. In my mind, that was how I was going to make a difference. And that's how I approached it yeah so in that I ran the wishbone so well that there was a JV

team BYU has a trend than a JV team they'll go play UNLV Air Force JV team JV so the freshman so I was on that team I was third string freshman Wow and so we would go play and they said well he does he play, he plays, he runs the wishbone so well, let's just run the wishbone that we practiced last week against Wyoming when we go to the game. And I thought, you know, in some ways, the most disrespectful thing you can tell me is that, you know, my goal of making them think that I was a great Wyoming corner is now, I'm not even running, I'm not even getting ready to play my own team so it kind of backfired but I think that that that mentality was when you asked me how I went from eighth yes and moved up was finding

purpose when it's easy to say there wasn't purpose find a way to make a difference when it doesn't look like there's much place to do it. Right. My goal, Kyle Whittingham was the long-term coach of the University of Utah for the last 20 years. He was the middle linebacker, the leader of the defense when I joined. And so I'm running the scout team, and I wanted to frustrate Kyle Whittingham. I remember running to the sidelines one time and running out of bounds. And him, because, you hit the they hit us but it wasn't like it was full speed sure he hit me as hard as he could and put me out of bounds and into the fence you know and then he came over the top and just quit embarrassing me wow and i was

like yes i'm doing my job yeah i won i remember that so vividly. Now, you talked about, I've heard you talk about, you know, having a lot of anxiety and nerves. I think you threw up a lot before almost every game. Every game. Every game? Every game. And pro or more just college? Well, so I don't know how we don't want to get too far into this. But I didn't know as a kid.

During the day, three sport, all state, straight A's, never missed school. I mean, if you saw my life, you'd be like, that guy, he's got it going on. But when the sun went down, I was at home. And I didn't realize why, but if people said, hey, we're going for a ski week, or we're going to scout camp, we're like, oh, no, I got practice. Oh, no, no. Because I had innate fear of that not being home. During the day, it's fine. But like, if my parents left for a vacation, which they tried once, I convinced all my brothers and

sisters, and I was the oldest, that the people babysitting us were ax murderers. And we got them so upset that the parents had to turn around. So I had this pretty severe, what we'd call separation anxiety. You've seen kids that are afraid to go to people's houses, afraid to go to school, afraid to... That's me. Where do you think that came from? It's genetic. Really? It's in my mom's side of the family.

Wow. And we found out when I was 30 years old, through another traumatic event with the NFL, that it finally got named. I didn't know. I grew up... When I went to college, it was death defying. I didn't unpack my bags oh but I knew I knew you're supposed to go yeah like you're supposed to go to college

and you're supposed to love it and I was like oh inside my stomach was you know the anxiety whatever that's what it was but it just to me felt like a stomach ache like this is not I don't want to do this but I knew like I can't sit at home right and so I did that my I remember that first semester that's why I was begging my dad let me come home too because I just like get me home sick and I just want to get back so I remember going back for Christmas finally getting a chance to go back home I remember walking in the door and when when I walked in, I realized, oh, I have two homes now because I want to go back to college.

You did want to go back. So that was where the first step for me was like, you mean I don't have to have this all the time? I can actually develop a second home. And then that home became a great home. And then I had to go pro, which I know I told myself, don't do it you've you know don't go pain and anguish for what you've been through to play college football and I'll hear him all-american

I finished second the Heisman Trophy but the emotional strain on doing that and the it wasn't playing was the best. It was the three days before, especially the day before, because genetic separation anxiety in performance shows up as, and everyone always says, well, of course you're nervous. You know, that's normal. You know, like, yeah, but I don't know if this is what that is. And so that was my life and defined so much of my career. People, you know, if you said to me today,

Steve, if you could leave that genetic part of you that's in your mom's side of the family that you were born with, now that you're 60 years old, would you do that? And I thought about that recently. I said, no, I wouldn't. Despite all the anguish and pain of it. And it defined, because there's good sides to it. There's hyper vigilance well

you want to think i was ready to play you want to think that i was prepared and so in that way that defined you know people say well you're in the pro football hall of fame how come if you had to say why well this is one of the main reasons why so if that's the why then like anything, and that's why it would have been nice when I talk about mental health, and I'm so open about it because like, everyone has insecurities, everyone has reasons to be asking questions

about mental health. I say to them, if you're in the woods, lost, in the middle of the woods, had no idea where to go, and a park ranger came by, would you ask for directions? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'd say, hey, pick me up. So, but we have this shaming that goes on

around insecurities and mental health and everybody's going through it to actually be vulnerable like you did and say, well, what are my insecurities? How can I be better? And then what are, are there genetic or clinical things that I can find help with? Like, so if I could have defined that as a kid

at eight years old, that would have been better. That's crazy, yeah. I mean, how on your, on a scale of one to 10, let's call it the peace scale, the inner peace scale. 10 being you had ultimate inner peace. You were calm and relaxed. One being zero peace. In college, where were you on that scale

one to ten on average it's it's um it's episodic right because when when i wasn't now walking around the day before the game when i would see everyone as this lucky guy who don't need to go face this music you know like, like, look, you don't even have to worry about anything. But if it was during the time or during the week when it just wasn't as heightened, it was wonderful. Yeah. Yeah. And so, and people are like, you're Steve, you're great.

I saw the game. And, you know, so you get all that too. So it was just a... There's a lot of pressure before the game. My teammates, you know, they got used to it. Like, hey, Steve's thrown up yet? Because if he's thrown up, then we're good. Really?

Yeah. And if he hasn't, then we have come to throw up. Come throw up. Oh, my gosh. We've got to get this over with. Doesn't that translate into pro career also? Where you were... So, you...

Like, the human condition, you do get better at, like I got better at separation anxiety. I got- You had tools, you learned to manage it. Nah, I don't know about tools. I just had, like you have to, you can't live that way. So did it get easier? No. I retired 18 years later and the day I retired,

I was like, I remember one of my last games I ever played was a Monday night game. And I was engaged to my wife, Barb. And I was walking around the stadium early because it's Monday night. And I was hypervigilant, I'll call it. Not anxiety-ridden, but hypervigilant. And I wanted someone to talk to.

And she's like, I need to go. And I'm like, let's just talk a little bit longer this is 18 years later so you'd already won three Super Bowl yeah so it doesn't who you are is kind of how you do it and you know that's my when I when I finally realized when I was 30 years old through tough circumstances I had not slept for a couple, I always slept, which is great. That's good. That's how you do it.

Yeah, yeah. And one week, I was in a bad spot. We lost some games. I was in a bad place. Trying to replace Joe Montana and all the expectations. Just over the last months, I got myself in a pretty hole of victimization like everything was everyone else's fault I'm being victimized it's terrible this is horrible and and uh and then all of a sudden I wasn't sleeping and it was a big game again little falcons I think that week at home and so two

nights I didn't sleep and the people that I was living with nearby, a family that I was really dear with, said, look, Steve, we know you and we know that we see you, what you go through to go play and we get used to it. That's fine. But this is not right. This is not cool. And so we're not going to, we can't abide this any longer. So what are you going to do about it?

And I said, look, if we win, because then you can have something wrong, I'll go to the team doctor and I'll talk about what's going on. Because I don't know what the heck it is. But if we lose, I can't do that. I ended up playing well, winning, fulfilled my promise. And they have to face it. Yeah. And so the team doctors, Jim Clint, been around forever, came in with Joe Montana and Ronnie Lott and Bill Walsh, and he was, I was an honored guy. Like, he was a guy I didn't want to necessarily go talk about, like, some weakness that I had or something that I thought was, you know,

here's the park ranger, do I ask the question, right? And so I promised myself I would. I promised his family I would. So I get back in the corner of Candlestick Park and the training room underneath when crap's dripping on you, and towel and ice bag, and I go, I go, the rest of the day it was Reggie,

and Reggie, I gotta talk to you. So I go in the corner and I look. And I start to recount the week and what's going on. And I noticed that all of a sudden, a big ball of tear comes into his eye and drops to the ground. And then another. the doctor's eye the doctor and i'm like reggie are you crying and he essentially breaks down and tells me that he

barely got through medical school fighting a different kind of anxiety that was like plagued so much of his life and that he was crying because how upset he was as the team doctor because he sensed in watching me he's like i should have i felt it and i didn't do anything about it i've watched you for years now i never talked to you about it and i'm so i'm so sorry oh man and so his so think about. I'm nervous about asking this question because I don't know what the heck's going on. I'm like at my wits end. And finally, I ask it to him and he comes back to me weeping. I'm like, oh, my gosh.

So that starts that whole, I didn't mean to get belabored on that. How did that make you feel when he brought that vulnerability? So he immediately told me, Steve, you have undiagnosed childhood separation anxiety. It's very typical. A lot of kids have it. And you need to know that that's what it is. And now you're performing, and so it's got its tentacles in performance. But that, you know, ends up being a pretty severe case of it.

And that's that. And so once it was defined, that was what I needed. I needed to know. Clarity. what is it because i look back i'm like oh that's why when i went to my aunt's house and freaked out for the whole weekend you know that i thought he was an axe murderer too because because that's how my body responds to the when did when did you feel like you were able to start healing, the journey of healing? Well, the healing is, I think that more than anything, it wasn't necessarily that I felt like, it was who I, in other words, there's nothing, I have this genetic part of me, like it's, and I think that what I could do is use the good parts yes as a much more profound thing and then you see the parts that are more difficult and figure out ways to the tools to get through

better but not healing wouldn't how i would describe it okay you know i think that through time when i retired my life was zen really after you retired you were like because there was no more pressure i mean getting married zen having kids zen it was all easy oh 80 000 people aren't watching right you know there's not a national audience every week like that was like it just disappeared so you didn't have any anxiety after that not not really no because i i think it just, over time, it finds its, you know, it kind of gets beaten out of you. Well, you talk about the law of love is loving as God loves, seeking another's healing and expecting nothing in return. And when I read that and I heard that story about the doctor, it felt like he was able to he was kind of sad but also there was some healing in him to be able to see it in you and have you open up about it and allow vulnerability the space

in between the unknown to come together and allow for love and healing to start to occur so louis you're you're now getting a theme for me for relationships. Yes. That's all we really are is a series of relationships. Yeah. And then in those relationships, you and I have a relationship. We've been around each other half an hour. We're in a relationship.

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And in that space is where purpose and legacy and growth and life's most important aspects all happen in those relationships. And so how do we see them? And I have to tell you a quick story about Bill Walsh. So he was my head coach in the 49ers when I joined in 1987. He was the king. Two Super Bowls. Everyone knew he was three generations ahead of everybody.

His offense, the West Coast offense, you'll be familiar with. How he saw players as partners. He didn't see him as chattel or someone to pound with a big stick. He saw them as not almost as equals. Like, how do I think about your food, how you eat, how you sleep, how your mental health. Back in the 80s. In the 80s. Wow. He was asking these questions. And I remember the first meeting, he said how he's going to integrate the team. And we thought about racially, because that's where black guys and white guys, we're all going to come together in the locker room.

He says it's even more than that. It's all the things that separate us. Where you went to school, geography, socioeconomic background, language you speak, religion, everything that kind of generally culturally separates people. We want to break them all down. Because we're going to be in Lambeau Field. We're going to be down by four points. It's going to be the last couple minutes of the

game it's gonna be raining at 30 degrees you've never been colder because it's windy there's 80,000 people that are screaming at you and I want you to get in a huddle and I want to look at each other and I want you to share an element of love for each other Wow and that's the speech the first speech he ever made that I was a part of in 1987 was that speech. Holy cow. And so I was like, I don't know what that is, but I'm in for that. And so he then, and I noticed in the corner as he was making that speech, a guy with a

camera filming the whole thing. Then filmed him going out on the field and going into the locker room and going, and I chuckled a little bit, like what is he, I know he's famous and he's like ahead of the game and everything but is he a museum has he got something going what he was doing was creating a video based audio based paper-based collection of everything that he was everything that i am as a coach everything that i know everything that i'm now three generations ahead of in the NFL and everyone knows it, I'm going to put it in a, I want it in a box. Wow.

Why do I want it in a box? Because I have minority coaches who I want to see thrive in the NFL. And I want to hand it to them as they go out the door. It's incredible. To get head coaching jobs. It's incredible. And the last thing he says, I'll see you in the championship game. Because he knows with this box,

they have all these tools to get there. And that's what happened. He was vlogging in the 80s. Mike Holmgren came back as assistant coach, goes to the Packers, and we came back and saw him in the championship game. And I remember seeing Brett Favre after the game, they beat us.

And I go, Brett, what did Mike tell you the big speech in the hotel last night? He told him the speech. He's like, he went to build a little toolkit, bought out the big game file and gave the speech. Crazy. So I guess the point is, Bill Walsh,

why would someone who's three generations ahead, think of technology, think of business, think of sports, think of anybody who has some proprietary knowledge that they know is a huge advantage, some talent that they have, anything. And I'm going to box it up somehow and hand it out. For free. For free to elevate you. When you talk about the law of love, self selfless acts are hard i've been trying to teach myself this book has probably helped me more than anything how do i get into a space where i have no

transaction yes because even the best so much of the good in the world is still slightly transactional i actually get a wonderful feeling because i helped this person. Yes. What if it can be completely non-transactional? You lose yourself. In that way, Bill might have been thinking about legacy. He might have been thinking about abundance. But I have a feeling he was completely isolated on this coach and their success. And when you can get to that place, what happens is life stops being zero-sum game. We are in a entropic world where we're all going to die, everything's corroding, everything

we see is headed south eventually. Very transactional world, eat what you kill, zero-sum game, you get what you get, I get what I get, shake hands, move on. Is there a place of abundance? Is there a space? And people say, well, yeah, if you give in, but what if there was just a spirit of abundance and you sought it you that's I'm gonna look for it can you find it in I'll leave you a quick another quick story guy remind me of Bill was because I want to ask you but Reggie white Reggie white was the you know Reggie white Reggie white was the greatest defensive player I would make the argument the greatest defense player ever played in the NFL yeah ever you say

Ray Lawrence Taylor you could say but he was massive his football card said I want to say it's 6-6-3-10 but anyone who writes down you know this but when you're a rookie the the trading card company gives you a piece of paper you fill it out uh-huh so you look at my cards you're two inches taller 6-2-2-0-5 every card in existence will say, Steve Young, BYU, 6'2", 205. Because I wrote that down. For sure. And I wasn't lying. That's what I believed.

Oh, wow. It was aspirational. It was aspirational. But it's what I believed. Reggie writes 6'6", 310. If you write 310, you're 400. Right. There's no way you write 310 and literally mean that.

But he was the most athletic biggest strongest guy you've ever seen lebron james if you've ever been around him 6 8 280 beast you just you you just kind of not cower but you just kind of slink back as like there's a real athlete it's like you just cannot know how fast and how strong that's reggie white reggie was 380 400 pounds but ran like he was 210. wow so when you played him and he was loud you know like he yelled he would scream and the guttural stuff and you could hear him coming drop back to pass ah you could hear it coming closer and closer and close then classic reggie he's gonna get therebed me every time he ever sacked me.

What, 20 times in his career? Really? Oh man. I don't know. That's painful. Played the Packers, played the Eagles. That's painful. He'd get me, turn me on and let him, and he'd fall on his back and I'd fall on top of him.

Oh wow. So here's the most intense, adrenaline filled, you've been on the football field, 80,000 people, millions watching tv the biggest game championship game there's a place of intensity there that's hard to describe he's the most intense of the guys there coming to get do his job competitive as every talk about transact like where this is my transaction world i'm good you're going down because that's my job. Yeah. Grabs me. And in that flash of an instant, turns, lets me fall on top of him. He's got me around and he goes, Steve,

how you doing, buddy? Really? Because we were friends from when we were rookies. No way. And we went to the hula bowl together. He was Tennessee. I was BYU. We'd be fast friends. He's the minister. He was a evangelical minister. I loved chatting with him about religion, about life, about everything. And my dad was a lawyer, Gret, and it helped me get an agent. And he goes, well, can your dad help me? So my dad helped him. So he'd have me in his thing.

He's like, how's your dad? No way. Yeah, how's everything going? And I'm like, well, right now, Reggie, not so good. I'm getting sacked right now. But my point is the same point I want to describe to everybody in the athleticism of who reggie white was he could be the ultimate competitor

and in a flash be the ultimate friend wow can we because most of the guys i played against who were friends couldn't make that transition they were like i need to destroy you they couldn't after the game then i know everybody how you doing but But in the moment, can you be two or three things? Can you hold in suspense the pieces of you? And that's why I say go back to Bill Walsh. Like, the legacy of that abundant act is throughout the NFL today. Kyle Shanahan, Sean McVay here in town. You go up and down every team, the Chargers, the Rams, the 49ers, the Seahawks, Pete Carroll.

That's just the West Coast. You just go throughout the league. I can read off probably 30 of 32 teams that have coaches who were directly influenced by this toolkit and by the people who took it. What were the three biggest lessons he taught you? One is the spirit of abundance. I didn't know it at the time. I didn't know what to call it. As I've gotten older, I see it. I see its power, the legacy power of why

if we act, even in some kind of righteousness transactionally it will rot like the rest of this world sooner or later in self-interest mm-hmm if you can find a spirit of abundance where you can have a transaction there's a lot of business transactions a lot of transactions but in that in that relationship there's a spirit of abundance yes, a lot of transactions, but in that relationship, there's a spirit of abundance. Like how do I speak? If I'm going to speak in abundant language, what would I say? If I'm going to be a long-suffering, gentle persuasion, loving, love unfeigned kind of

person and I'm going to act that way, what would my language be like? Even in intense, highly competitive, transactional world. Because that's not going away. Right. You can't, like, I can't be a monk and just go and disappear for 10 years. I'm in the mix. And I like being in the mix.

Yes. That's where I wanna be. But can I speak abundantly in all of those places? On the field, in the most intense, crazy spots. That's why I bring up the Reggie White story. Yeah. Where there's a win, win, win. How can everyone with thousands of books written about it?

Yes. In the end, I think it's an intent. And it has to be a. Yes. It has. Some people do it, I think, very naturally. It's in them them it's just who they are they're naturally love love kind of people mm-hmm but those of us that are super transactional want to win when I do great want to show how like I want

credit what human being doesn't want credit right to be acknowledged to be serious to be valued right yes that's. That's human nature is to want that. That's why what we're describing here, abundant thinking is not of this world. Because this world's a transactional world. This is a dog-eat-dog world. This is a kind of science has proven it by the second law of thermodynamics. It's, this is where we're headed. And I just-

But that's not where you create- You create the abundance in elevating beyond and above what is natural seeking of- Human desires. Yeah. It's a different field. It's a different field. And I thought about it a lot.

It's like, well, that's easy to do when things are quieter. Yeah, when it's easy. But what about laying it on top of the most intense places on earth, whether it's politics? And think in our political game today, completely zero-sum game.

Completely everything is just mine or yours. And we are, and not only only that we kind of point it out and then attack attack like we're gonna where are you headed we are essentially becoming the full measure of this transactional rotting world if that's how we're going to that's how we're going to be right it doesn't matter what we're the biggest winner we're great to, that's how we're going to be. It doesn't matter what, we're the biggest winner. We're great. You know, school of great. And we're great today because I beat you and I won and look what I have. I'm great. In this world, the way we're, you know, it depends on how you describe it. Okay. That, if that's great, then great. But what's the legacy?

What's the abundance? What's the long, because if we're going to last a long time, by definition, we can't do this. Yes. What doesn't work? Can't, like people say, oh, Steve, what about, trust me, you're on a path of entropy, right? Like we're going to rot. Yes. You're going to die gonna die your marriage you're in a marriage and my wife and i am like we'll go 50 50 we're in it together you're on your way

to destruction because 50 50 says that well if you do 49 i'm off the hook yeah gotta be 100 100100. Have to. Spirit of abundance would demand that it doesn't matter what you do. I'm in. And when your spouse feels that, I start to, I weep because I, that, that is an abundant relationship that can, that is not,

like that's a perpetual, it's a perpetual, like think about it, it's heaven. People are talking about heaven. Well, if there's a heaven, it's a perpetual place. It's a place of perpetuity. It's not a place of transaction. It can't be self-interested. It has to be a place where people live

in a state of others' interest first, seeing others. That was great. I want to go back to the lessons that Bill taught you in a second, because you gave me one, I think. But you mentioned your wife, and I think you said you got married later. I did. So you were 18 years in your career. Right at the end, the last season.

Right at the end. Why did you wait? I'm curious. I didn't wait. I sought marriage. I knew it was a good thing and I wanted it in my life and I didn't find it. Now again, women that I dated through the years would probably hear the story about the anxiety and the hyper-focus and the distraction, like, oh, that makes some sense. That's why we didn't work out.

But I would tell you that when I met Barb, 10 years in the making, by the way, finally we're going to do it. She didn't want to date an athlete. And it was just hard getting, and so I was coming to pick her up and I left the message and heard her voicemail back in 1999 and I heard her voice and I I said oh that sounds there's a familiarity to me I don't know how to describe it mmm so people say love at first sight like love it first here first sound first

sound and uh and that's you know i went on the first date where she was in scottsdale arizona i was in a rental car town car like a lincoln town car and i never went home just stayed and dated her throughout the off season and then we got engaged six months later wow that's beautiful so why like i tried it was not an effort like getting married to 38 was not that was suboptimal And then we got engaged six months later. Wow, that's beautiful. So I tried. It was not an effort. Getting married at 38 was not, that was suboptimal. Right, right. You wanted to do earlier.

Right. So you've been married how long now? 20, we're 2000, so 22 years. 22 years. What's the greatest gift she's given you in 22 years? She is a reflexively loving person, especially to marginalized people. She is a reflexively loving person, especially to marginalized people. And I dedicate this book to her because she started me this super transactional guy that wants to be good, wants credit, but wants to do good in the world and wants to see the best.

To us, we define this transactional world. We say, what's the best part of transaction? Well, if I do something good for you and then I get a little something, that's win-win. That's not what I'm talking about. And so she had this reflexive love for people that were marginalized, not like me or her. And I could see that she saw them.

When you put in, I hate air quotes, but to see somebody, you can only see them in that way when you've lost yourself in it. And you just, then you see the full measure of the person that's across from you. And that's just natural to her. Even if I desire heaven, it's a transaction, right? It's like somehow it's... And we are talking about that. And until you lose in the spirit of abundance in the relationships you have here right now,

there's a miraculous thing that happens in relationships when that happens. It's rare when you've actually lost... What happens? In relationships when that happens, it's rare when you've actually lost what happens I Think it's It's how God loves mmm. God loves without transaction. Like in other words, I seek your glory. I seek your learning and growing Well, what do you get I I know I get it through your learning and growing.

If I want something, there's only way to get it is to lose yourself in this healing of other human beings. Interesting. So I, for me, I started to practice like, can I do that in business? Really? In negotiations, in big, huge contracts? Can I do that up and down the partnership? Can I do that?

Could I have done that better in the football field? How much was I doing at the time? What would I do differently? And it came to me that you can go and do all the things you want to do in the spirit of this, what we're describing. And what you do is you unlock the potential, full potential of the relationship,

of its healing, of its growth, of its abundance, of whatever it could possibly be, and then it just emanates. So that if you could get, theoretically, 30,000 people to just go do this, and practice it, and try to, like, you kind of think to yourself, I could change the world.

Sure. So that's, I don't know. That's beautiful. You can see I'm slightly energized about it just because it's an amazing realization. This is everything that I, that, you know, I've been doing this for 10 years at School of Greatness and I've had the pleasure of sitting across people like yourself who are at the top. Not me amazing, but the amazing people you've talked to before I showed up. But I mean, there's a common theme that a lot of people have been having over the last few years, which is similar to what you're saying. And they're saying it in different sectors of therapists, scientists, doctors, world-class athletes, billionaires,

which is about creating a space of healing and of opening, of connection, of intimacy. And one of the greatest things, which is service. And I heard recently one person said there are three circles in life. The first circle is survival. The second circle is success. And the third circle, he said, was significance. And I was like, I really think it's more service. It's that third circle. And if we can really get into a place of service earlier in our lives, While we're trying to survive and be successful, I feel like we'll have a lot more healing, peace, abundance, and love with everyone around us as well. So people hear that, hear me and you talk like this, and will say, oh, that sounds... But life is really hard.

Yeah. But I'm sorry, but on the ground, that doesn't work. And what I would say is I understand that because scientifically it's been proven that you are right we're in an entropic world we are going to rot and decay and we're like you know it is dog eat dog and eat what you kill like i get that as a foundation but clearly as a foundation if we see it as an educative condition in other words we can't be abundant or grow or heal or any of the things that we just talked about unless the conditions are such that we have a body we have agency to choose and we have opposition to fight against like those are the so in some ways people say oh there's great evil in the world. Well, it must be.

We need it. It has to be, opposition has to be. What happens if we don't have that? You can't grow. Grows in agency. Like in other words, you and I, whatever, you could be wrapped up as a mummy in a corner, chained, like like but still breathing alive

you still have a choice your next breath has a choice you might not be free in your mind i mean as far as what i can go run and do sure but you still have a conscious thought of what my next conscious thought's going to be what's my next act what's my next so there's agency in the human condition and there's opposition in the human condition recognizing it for what it is so that then the person who says oh steve that's really sweet what you guys are talking about that's a bunch of crap because i don't have i don't have time for that totally understand but because i actually appreciate that you are in the mix recognizing the rigor but you're not seeing the miracle in the rigor.

Right. Because that's the ingredients for why you can even talk about this. Man, there's something, when I think back of those two years of struggle after football was done, being injured on my sister's couch, no money. This was 2007, 2008, 2009,

when the economy was crashing, so there weren't job opportunities at that time. As challenging as it was, I'm like, man, those were some great times too. Just because it allowed me to see what I was made of. What can I overcome? What can I discover and learn and grow into? And I want to take back that challenge, that, you know, that suffering time or whatever you want to call it. It allowed me to overcome something to help me get one step closer to service and becoming something i'm proud of you know so i don't know if you had a moment like that that's the sweet so there's the sweetness in life and i've had a thousand moments like that where now recognizing

uh just through years not understanding this dynamic and this truth about humanity and about, no matter religion, look, what we can agree on is science, this is entropic. These are the conditions. And are these conditions that can actually elevate? And I say absolutely yes. They're the fundamental conditions, agency, opposition, and a body. Three things that you have to have to go enact this incredible gift that you've been given of rigor and pain and heal. And that can we be aids in

each other in the healing as we grow? Yeah. Because if you think about what God would want is, I want your healing and growth. It's going to be a bumpy ride. Can you all help each other heal? That, then it becomes super. And it doesn't have to be religious. It can just be, it can be completely from an atheist perspective. How do I want the human condition to rise? The only way is if we leave this, the condition we're in. Yes.

We have to go, we have to rise above it. Go beyond it, yeah. And if we're going to, in any system, by definition yes we have to go we have to rise above it go beyond it yeah and if we're gonna in any system by definition we have a political system you can see it like rotted it's the unknown education system we're dead yeah you just start to see them and say which ones are working and that's why you talk about the recent conversations you've had with folks it's rattling around a lot of people's minds it's like wait a second i'm super rich i'm billionaire i've dominate the world i got planes all over the that's not me by the way but I'm really complaining I can go to where I can do anything I want what's meaningful what's meaningful what is not for credit anymore what is there someone to heal and the truth is for every human being it's probably the person

you're sitting right next to. Wow. Right? That's where to start. I was talking to some Christian missionaries recently who, you know, they couldn't be out because of COVID. And that's, well, all I want to do is be out and do this work. I have this energy about it. And I said, well, do you have any humans you're in contact with because I'm stuck at home like well yeah my mom and my brother-in-law like be

in service here what just know that what healing can you bring mmm what abundance can you bring to that relationship that's doesn't matter where you are. Yeah. That's where, and then people say, okay, so now you're lined up across the field, Reggie White, where's the abundance? Doesn't mean you can't compete. I'll leave you another story. So Ronnie Lott, one of the great competitors alive. He's the only guy that cut off his finger.

Remember it got crushed and he said, I gotta play. I'm gonna cut off the tip of his finger. He, and he said, I gotta play, I'm gonna cut off the tip of his finger. He, one year we were supposed to, the New York Giants needed us to win the last game of the year, so they could get in the playoffs.

But we didn't need to win it because we'd already wrapped everything up and so we were gonna play the backups and everything else. So we ended up losing the game because it wasn't that vital. And Phil Simpson said, the 49ers laid down like dogs. And Ronnie was just livid.

So the next year we played the Giants in one of the big games. And horned up at halftime at Candlestick. And you start at the 50, go the opposite. So you're all standing right there. And Ronnie goes over and sees Phil Simms. You see him. And usually in that situation, you know this. Everyone got like, oh, you keep talking about it. Everybody's like, Ronnie.

We're backing off. We're backing off. And I could hear some of them, and I go afterwards, like, Ronnie, what did you say? And he goes, he doesn't understand that competition is a team game. And that if you disrespect anyone in the competition, you've lost the ability for the competition to elevate. Because in the learning, I'm going in, I might win or I might lose, but either way, I can grow. Wow.

And I was like, huh. This is on the field, pregame. On the field, I was like, no, this is later when I talked about what he said. He goes, he said, why were you so animated? Because he doesn't understand. And I was like, funny, because I didn't understand either. But think what he was saying. The competition can be a place of elevation if it's properly nurtured.

Absolutely. Because you just described in that couple of years, in 2019, it's in the, like what I lost is where I gained, where I gained the greatest gift. And so losing can be the place of abundance. But if you did, so if we become a winner and losing society where the winners get everything and the losers just some sad sack that doesn't...

We've lost the spirit of Ronnie Lott to show. And I think about our culture. Our culture is really a winning culture. Great, I get it. But we need to do better at recognizing the competitiveness, the spirit of that space of competitiveness that we honor losers for what can be gained yeah because if we don't honor them as they're you know the lakers play the clippers and the clippers

lose you're a loser but if we don't honor the the losers ability to grow and gain then we we end up doing we're the losers then yeah we do the same thing yeah yeah of course i feel like a loser than i got right right right so it's just, again, you start to see it repeats over and over again. I'm curious how, I mean, you've transitioned to this successful business career that I don't think a lot of people know about the success you've had in business. What has been the biggest fear and insecurity that you've had in the last, I guess, 20 plus years now of building this, you know, being a part of this firm and building this massive private equity.

So it's funny. I told you when you stop playing, no matter whether you played 18 years or one year or even leave college, there's this, the dream of those games that you love that you wanted to, you know, you knew you can't play forever. It's the only man's game.

But whenever it happens, there's a day before, and when I finished, I played 18 years, and you could say one of the better guys that played, and the day before, I was probably one of the better guys in the world that could play quarterback in the NFL. The next day I retired, I'm not great at anything. Right, you're a beginner again. I'm not even good at anything.

How do I get started? And I think like you, I dug in and tried to find that vulnerability to say what I'm good at, what can I get good at, how do I do it, and how do I get started? And that's what I did. Luckily, I had gone to law school while I was playing, which is an odd, it's a great young story

where he told he kept peppering me like you know because his big thing when you're growing up is you have to have a dream and a plan he said they're both vital dream is one percent chance plan is eighty percent chance and you need both and I said and I kept telling him well my dream is one percent chance I'm gonna play in the NFL and that's my plan too and he goes that's not a plan so but then when I played in the NFL I go dad ha i made a dream became the plan and he kept saying no it's not something because you only can play three years average then i played five years and he goes but you know what let's say you finish it 30 years later the other half of your life what are you going to do so he kept playing so i ended up going to law school. It's incredible. Try to appease this crazy

So anyway that law school gave me the opportunity post Playing when I had to figure out what I was even good at or could be good at But the funny thing is because I didn't do it traditionally And those in private equity usually leave school go to associate For a couple years then go back to business school and then get a job. And then you're in banking, you know, and all around the world, they have certain skills that are gained through that. Now I want to cut the line essentially.

And I don't think I ever lost the insecurity of doing that. Now, despite people say, well, no, Steve, you have, you know, blah, blah, blah. In the end, I think the thing that I, that was super hard was always, you talk about insecurities, it was like facing the insecurity of I'm not a legitimate. Business guy.

Business guy. Because you're now 40 essentially, when everyone's been doing it since they're 24 or whatever. Yeah. Right, and so I think that holding onto that vulnerability was probably a good thing, because what you don't wanna do is go rolling into a room and thinking that you're more than you are i do i am a fan of fake it till you make it yeah i think there's a piece of life that's important when you're getting started uh-huh

but i think that fake it means not fake other people but fake it yourself like yeah fake yourself out because you have the insecurities you got the doubt you got the fear like just act like you really know what you're doing. It's part of the game. This was part of, you know, I heard this early on. I can't remember who said this, but I didn't come up with it. Someone said, face it till you make it. And so I started facing my fears and saying, what can I do every day just by showing up?

I like that better. Yeah, it's like, I'm vulnerable. I don't have the skills, but I'm going to keep facing it. I love that. Until I gain the skill. I mean, I'm not going to say fake it till you make it anymore because I don't like I never liked it, but it gave the right image. Yes. Face it till you make it as well.

So look at you. Give him back. Well, I've learned a lot here, but it's not it's not for me. But someone else said face it till you make it and then you embrace it or something like that, too. So it's like it's that really resonates with me. Yeah. Because I tell people to fake it till you make it. But I never liked it. I never liked it. Face it. You know, you went That really resonates with me. Yeah. Cause I tell people to fake it till you make it, but I never liked it. I never liked it.

Face it, you know, you went all in and showed up every day. You were faking it by acting upon it. You were practicing it every day by showing up, which I think is really cool. What is your biggest fear now? After again, Hall of Fame career, Super Bowls, you know, billions of dollars in assets that you guys manage. I think- TV and all these things. Fear. Fear. super bowls you know um billions of dollars in assets that you guys manage i think tv and you

know uh fear i think it's i mean inevitably one of the best things that heaven's given to learn some of these things we've been talking about to elevate is kids because you you have a little baby and they're completely helpless and without you doing selfless acts of service because the baby's not going to give you any like oh thanks for that in fact i found out that kids generally not until they have kids do they really ever appreciate you really understand right it's not anyone's fault it's just circles yeah yeah simba so uh Circles one. Yeah, yeah. Simba.

So I think that that's, if you're talking about fears and anxieties, naturally when you are so invested in the success or glory or growth or maturity of abundance of this human that your wife and I, my wife and I created, you end up in a place of anxiety or fear because you want to make sure it happens. And if you really want to do it right, you can't guarantee that, nor should you guarantee it. In fact, you should be very careful where you insert yourself. Mm-hmm. And the thing that I've found is the fear is that i haven't modeled what i hope they would see you don't feel like you have that's the fear i hope i have right because in the modeling is where the power is right it isn't in the the saying or or making sure that you've created a lane that made it available

or God given an opportunity. It's have you modeled the very thing that you hope for them? And have you done it in a way that they've taken it over a lifetime so it's a part of them? And so maybe the fear of that is how you get there. But that's the... And what's the biggest lesson then being a dad has taught you? Don't raise yourself.

You know, if my son had been a quarterback and a three-sport athlete and had some anxiety. I can parent that because I know that. And what came with Brayden is someone who's very different. It's a lot of similarities but a lot of differences that were fundamental that I had to really grow to be a productive parent. I had to figure out new ways to parent someone that wasn't just like me yes and i found that my initial reaction is to try to make him like me so that i could

parent me through him right because that's what i knew and the biggest lesson is, if you're going to be a great parent, you need to become an athlete. Spiritual, emotional athlete. And challenge your insecurities and challenge your fears and all the things you just showed me how to do. Because parenting is really bespoke to that human being. And that's the lesson. And I failed at some places early on trying to figure that out and recognizing Sweet Brayden was patient with me.

You know, to kind of work my way through it. That's beautiful. I've got three final questions. I wanna be mindful of the time here. I could talk to you for hours, Steve. Oh, I love it. This is beautiful stories, man. This is fun, man.

Have we, has it been 10 minutes? I know, I know, this is great. Three Steve. This is beautiful stories, man. This is fun, man. Has it been 10 minutes? I know, I know. This is great. Three final questions. Before I ask you these questions, I want people to get the book, The Law of Love. I think it's really cool that you are this elite athlete from sports to business to life, relationships.

And we're here talking about love and abundance and peace and harmony and healing. And you're diving into what I'm hearing you, what's sounding like is this is the stuff that really matters the most. Above all the success, it's like the way to get those things also is through the law of love.

So I appreciate that. And I can tell you that the book is written to an lds audience a religious lds audience because that's all baltics are local right so that's my house my my and and we are a can-do people oh yeah and that's a transactional people and this is not that right and so it's really a myself this is my way forward yeah this is where i think if i was gonna love like god and and find the abundance despite the wonderful ingredients we have to grow this is how i would do it and so i want to just tell people if you're in this is, the language in here is not

necessary, but the lessons are truly, I believe in every religion and regardless of religion, in the human endeavor of the spirit of abundance and the law of love is absolutely the way forward because by definition it's perpetuity. And do we as a as a as humans want to pay it forward bring abundance into the future of course we do right we want to drag back and hold back and zero some game and in diminishing returns of course not but me all of us behave unfortunately in a way of diminishing returns yes and that's right you get what you get right so i i just want to caveat that because I want to make sure people like what the heck you know we have a guy about this book and it's all this other stuff so we have a very open-minded I call them conscious achievers they're constantly open to

learning new things even if it's not where they came from this community whether it be on YouTube or audio or over the place so I think people really gonna like this I've had a great time going through it. I haven't finished it, but I went through a lot of it. And the stories are really powerful and inspiring. It doesn't matter what religion or background you're from. It's human. It's very inspiring.

So I want people to get The Law of Love. Make sure you guys get a few copies for friends as well. Where can we get it? Is there a site we can get it from? You go to Amazon. Just Amazon is the main place. You've got an amazing foundation. And I'm not selling.

I didn't do the, I wrote this book for my family and someone convinced me to publish it. So I just want you to know that I am not here trying to sell this book. I'm here to do it for you. But I'm not, I really am. I just like, if you have a, if there's a gravitational pull to it, great.

But I, please don't get the, I appreciate it. No, I'm excited about it though. I think it's beautiful and uh you do you know i want to acknowledge you steve before i ask the final two questions for there's a lot of athletes who make it that don't live a life of service afterwards they make it and they make it about them and the fact that for the last you know 20 plus years you continue to make it about others through your foundation, through your charitable efforts. You're constantly involved in children's charity efforts.

Thank you. Through Kelly, you know, is always talking about how you serve every year. You just give without even needing the credit. You're just like, how can I serve through your own foundation? There's a lot of stuff behind the scenes that people don't see that you do

that makes a massive difference to individuals and to communities and i really want to acknowledge you for you consistently showing up you consistently healing growing and living a life of abundance through your efforts and your energy you know you show up on tv every week and inspire people that way through adding in lessons when you can obviously there's analysis, but then you throw in these great lessons that I think are, you throw in the peas and carrots in the sugar, right? You do it through this book.

You don't have to write this book. You don't have to spend the time to do this. You do it through the charities you do. And I just really acknowledge you for the continual gift that you are and that you bring to the world. Well, and again, so vital that it's like i'm learning yeah like this book helped me sure like i didn't i'm you said oh i've loved steve young's the expert no no no steve young is along with you on this what i believe is heaven's gift like it's

like i'm along i'm a passenger along with you. And if I have a couple tips for you, great. If I don't, but I'm, so by no means do I have, then my foibles, if someone wanted to list all my foibles through the years, you could easily do it. So I just want to make sure that, Gandhi is like for a reason, right? The rest of us, we're in the mix.

You're a human being. I get it. We all got challenges. But I appreciate what you're saying. That's very kind of you. But you keep showing up and that's a beautiful thing. And you don't have to. You've made money. You don't have to keep showing up for others.

So that's a beautiful thing. You're living a life of significance. Yes, you want to build your business and things like that, but you're living a life of success. Well, again, you can fully engage in this transactional world, but come from it in a spirit of abundance. That's how I describe it. Two final questions, and then we got to get you back. This is called the three truths question.

I ask everyone this at the end of the interviews. So it's a hypothetical question. Imagine it's your last day on this earth, many years away. You live as long as you want to live. You accomplish and give all you want to do in life. But for whatever reason, you've got to take all of your work with you. And it's your last day. And you've got to turn the lights off in this world. And hypothetical, no one has access to your commentary, your videos, your audios, this book. No one has access to any of your information, but you get to leave behind three lessons to the world. Three things you know to be true.

Yeah. And this is all the information we would have about you, Steve Young. What would be those three truths for you? Well, uh, for me, okay. So, all right. How do I say this in a really useful way? I believe fundamentally in a durable spirit that's inside of every human. That durable spirit is actually not, it's of a place of abundance and perpetuity but it's here to grow and our that's what we're that's what we're doing so if that's so for me the truth is the first truth is i guess that that that this whole human experience is to learn and grow and and we're in a perfect place to do it this is the perfect conditions to do it so that's I guess one that's beautiful that's one if you asked me 10 years ago it'd be different right you asked me today different season of life today um the other another truth is

kind of to to be able to create growth in other human beings like we actually help we we are the we are the we're the fuel yep you know i think that i don't think anyone feels that god can do that by him or herself like they can't just say right i may because that would not be that's compulsion you can't compel people to be to grow and to learn it has to be free it has to be freely done and that's why we as we're here at the human condition we're free so that in that freedom i can actually do something miraculous for you yes so that's another truth for me that's beautiful is there's uh geez you are tough we're the fuel to help others grow i like that and the third third one is uh if you ask transactional questions you're going to get transactional answers from

heaven or anywhere else and there's abundantly clear that it is a place of no compulsion here. And so even from heaven, you ask transactional questions, you're going to get transactional answers. If you ask selfless, non-transactional questions,

you get completely different answers from others and human. And that is a place that I, you know, like I've been thinking about the most important things in my life, my marriage, and how much I want abundance in my family, you know, and all politics are local, right? It's all right here. And in the most, there's always towns, human, we're in the mix, right? most there's always towns human it's we're in the we're the mix right there's always heaven's revelation for me has come tenfold when i ask the not when i leave the transactional and i

ask these more abundant questions from this place of long-suffering gentle persuasion love what's the most important question you ask? Of myself? Am I exuding those qualities? It's not something to do. It's something to be. And for someone who loves to do, give me a list. Yeah, let's do this.

Give me a list. I will get it done. Take action. It's happening. Yes. But now I'm asking you to be, not do. And in the being is, that's what I say. So I say, I lay, I come into a relationship and I lay on those attributes of myself.

If I was gonna be those things, what words would I say? What actions would I take? What would define how I approach the problem? Like, do I have a solution for the problem? I do not. But I have a solution for how I approach the problem. Like, do I have a solution for the problem? I do not. But I have a solution for how I'm going to bring myself into it from these qualities of long suffering, gentle persuasion, and love.

If I use those words and act that way and try to, that's when there's a door unlocked. I don't wanna to say magical, it's not the right word, but miraculous. Yes. Happens when that, that's like somehow the,

the magic happens. Yeah, it's like it happens. It does happen. And I've seen that, I've seen that in the most intimate relationships I have. That's amazing. Sorry about that. I love this, man.

I love this. Final question for you. What's your definition of greatness? My definition of greatness, and I go back to Bill Walsh and how he and Barb, my wife, and how people who have guided my dad, my mom, like started me on a journey, right? And greatness, the other day I was on 101 driving. There was a wreck ahead of me, back up. It had just happened.

You can see there was still the smoke in the air, right? It looked like it wasn't a great, it was like, could be bad. Right. Highway patrolman had just shown up on the shoulder and gets out. And so I'm one of the early cars, right? And so I'm watching this happen.

He gets out. Cars are still going by kind of more quickly than they should. And I see him get out and start running around and like dodging in out of the cars. I'm like, what's he doing? There's a dog

that has gotten out from one of the cars because the the the the second patrolman's checking the people he's trying to save the dog because he saw he sees that the people are cared for they're okay now they're driving fast i want to go get the dog wow who does that who shows up in dangerous situations and jumps into danger to save a human being? Hey, they would save anybody. And I just, you asked me what greatness is. You might say greatness is having the most money or the most stuff or the most things, and that's fine. But I just saw greatness.

And so for me today, when I see selfless acts of service, selfless, like literally no credit, I'm not looking for anything. He was not looking for anything other than to try to save this life of this dog. And I just thought to myself, I kind of shed a little tear and said, thankful for those humans that naturally are that way because I'm trying to learn. I'm trying to learn that greatness. So Steve, thank you so much, man. I appreciate it. It's powerful.

I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally, as well as ad-free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our Greatness Plus channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode

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