The School of Greatness - The 5 Questions To Test Your Courage & Step Into Your FULL Potential EP 1464
Episode Date: July 5, 2023The Summit of Greatness is back! Buy your tickets today – summitofgreatness.comhttps://lewishowes.com/mindset - Order a copy of my new book The Greatness Mindset today!Questions unlock potential in ...you and through you. That’s why the Game Plan for Greatness begins by asking courageous questions. There are five questions that you need to answer to get to the heart of your personal greatness and push yourself to action. The right questions are the ones that require real courage to ask and answer.Give yourself permission to ask these questions – give yourself permission to be happy and successful. Our hesitancy to give ourselves permission to succeed is born out of fear, not from our Greatness Mindset in pursuit of our Meaningful Mission.In this episode you will learn,When to give yourself permission to step up, step back, step aside, or take whatever steps you need to in your journey to greatness.Why far too many people focus on the ‘how’, when they should be thinking about ‘what’ they really want to do and ‘why’.5 powerful questions to unlock potential in you and through you.How to confidently say NO to things that aren’t serving you and your Meaningful Mission.How to ask the right kind of questions—courageous questions— that can quickly unlock something in you that’s been buried deep within.For more information go to www.lewishowes.com/1464Want more inspiring content? Listen here!Dr. Joe Dispenza - https://link.chtbl.com/1413-podJames Clear - https://link.chtbl.com/1395-podLisa Nichols - lewishowes.com/979Bruce Lipton - https://link.chtbl.com/1312-pod
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Calling all conscious achievers who are seeking more community and connection,
I've got an invitation for you.
Join me at this year's Summit of Greatness this September 7th through 9th
in my hometown of Columbus, Ohio to unleash your true greatness.
This is the one time a year that I gather the greatness community together
in person for a powerful transformative weekend.
People come from all over the world and you can expect to hear from inspiring speakers like
Inky Johnson, Jaspreet Singh, Vanessa Van Edwards, Jen Sincero, and many more. You'll also be able to
dance your heart out to live music, get your body moving with group workouts, and connect with others
at our evening socials. So if you're
ready to learn, heal, and grow alongside other incredible individuals in the greatness community,
then you can learn more at lewishouse.com slash summit 2023. Make sure to grab your ticket,
invite your friends, and I'll see you there. Greatness Media presents The Greatness Mindset,
greatness media presents the greatness mindset unlock the power of your mind and live your best life today by lewis howes narrated by lewis howes welcome to the school of greatness my name is lewis
howes a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur and each week we bring you an
inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock
your inner greatness.
Thanks for spending some time with me today.
Now let the class begin.
I dedicate this book to my younger self for having the courage to carry me through pain,
my current self for facing my shame and learning how to heal,
and to my future self because the journey to greatness has only just begun.
Step 4. The Game Plan for Greatness. Chapter 12. Ask Courageous Questions.
Ask courageous questions.
What has been holding you back from starting your meaningful mission?
The fear of doing it wrong.
Rachel Rogers, a black business owner, self-made millionaire, and author of We Should All Be Millionaires,
founded Hello7 to help people from marginalized communities learn how to develop seven-figure businesses.
Driven by the belief that when more marginalized people have money, it, the world, will become more equitable, she built a membership community affectionately called The Club.
Hello7 was a multi-million dollar success, but she felt her role in the business wasn't completely
fulfilling her mission. At the time, Rachel had been sitting on her idea for a non-profit for
nearly a year. She confessed to me, I know how to build a business and make money, but building a
non-profit and doing it right and not screwing it up, I'm really nervous about that. So I did what I have done with a lot of people and began
asking her questions. First, I asked her what she could accomplish with an extra $10 million.
As it turned out, she knew exactly what to do with it. She shared with me her dream of starting
that nonprofit to serve black mothers. The nonprofit would provide three main services, doulas to help
new mothers before and after delivery, night nurses to allow mothers time to rest, and subsidized
child care to help give mothers the opportunity to build their careers. We calculated that with
an extra $10 million, she could provide these services to more than 1,000 mothers.
Next, I asked Rachel, well, how would that make you feel? I'd be on top of the world.
So I pressed her with a little follow-up question to help her get practical. Well,
let's say you're going to help one mom, and this one mom is watching and listening right now.
going to help one mom, and this one mom is watching and listening right now. What places would she need to contact? Who could she email? What does she need to say? I had a reason for pushing Rachel.
She had achieved so much. She had already mastered money-making and team-building,
but her fear of failure ran the risk of holding her stagnant. I wanted to know what would get her excited,
what passion fueled her heart, and what first actions she might take to see her next dream
come to fruition. I think what I imagine doing in this non-profit is really just having a simple
application that people fill out. Okay, I said, give me the URL to an application page that you can say right now
that you'll make available in the next couple of days. Hello7.org. But we did not stop there.
Since she already had a couple of people in mind to help execute her ideas, I gave her a second
challenge. Call those two people with non-profit experience right after this interview.
Lastly, there was a business of making that $10 million a reality.
Who are three people you can call today and ask for a $100,000 check?
The amount did not really matter.
It was about keeping her momentum.
I kept pushing.
Have a form up in a day.
Call these two friends who have the nonprofit experience and contact three to five potential donors in the next 24 hours.
Text me tonight.
Rachel took all of the action I suggested,
and as a result, she quickly raised $200,000,
enabling her to immediately serve 40 mothers. And that is how the Hello7
Foundation was born. By asking the courageous questions, defining goals and deadlines, and
taking imperfect action, Rachel Rogers took her mission to the next level. All too often, people
focus on the how, when they should be thinking about what they really want to do and why.
When you do that, the how will follow.
Five courageous questions.
When you get your mindset in motion, things feel good, really good.
The right thoughts, emotions, and behaviors open up possibilities. The future
begins to look bright for a moment. And then the questions kick in. Well, what if? What about?
How will I? What will they say? The wrong negative questions can quickly derail you on your greatness journey. The right questions, however, are the ones that require real courage to ask and answer.
Questions unlock potential in you and through you.
That's why the game plan for greatness begins by asking courageous questions.
There are five questions that you need to answer to get to the heart of your personal greatness and push yourself to action.
I've used variations of these questions time and time again to coach people to push past fear and doubt.
And you can walk through these in any order you like, but each one will help you create a bias for action and inspire you to move forward as quickly as possible.
One, the purity question.
If you were to be 100% authentic to who you are, what would you do differently?
We all tend to present curated versions of ourselves.
Maybe it's because we aren't sure if people will like the real version of us.
But maybe it's also a crutch sure if people will like the real version of us.
But maybe it's also a crutch that keeps us from becoming great.
This question empowers you to own who you are and strive for who and what you want to accomplish and become.
Two, the priority question.
If you absolutely had to double your goal in the next 30 days, what would be your first three moves?
I like asking this question because it forces people to not simply think outside the box,
but to shatter it. I even dare to ask it in this way. If you knew you or someone you love would die, if you didn't double your goal and achieve it in 30 days,
what would be your first three moves? Now, this may seem like an extreme exercise,
but if you lived with a sense of urgency and you absolutely had to accomplish this thing you wanted,
but you've allowed fear to hold you back, what would you focus your attention on to make it happen? You can change the time frame to fit your situation,
but the important thing is that it feels pretty impossible to do at first glance.
Too often, we don't live with urgency. We accept the status quo and settle for less than we could
achieve just because it feels comfortable, and no one would die if we don't achieve it. But in fact,
every day we live is one less day we have to achieve those
goals and live out those dreams. If you are not okay with letting those dreams go unfulfilled,
then maybe you need to raise the stakes mentally to think and act differently.
Three, the possibility question. What would be possible for you if you could insert your goal, dream, or mission here?
This question allows you to insert the details of your situation into it and try on another
potential reality.
For example, what would be possible for you if you could leave your current job and devote
all your effort to growing your side hustle?
What would be possible for you if you could dramatically improve your family relationships?
You get the idea.
This question lets you explore how your path might feel if you achieved certain goals
and positions you to ask the next question.
Four, the passion question.
What would it feel like if you could, insert your goal, dream, or mission here.
We are all emotional beings at the core.
So this question frees you to explore how it might feel to experience success in the areas that are important to you.
What would it feel like for you if you could leave your current job and devote all your effort to growing your side hustle?
What would it feel like if you could dramatically improve your family relationships?
Five, the prosperity question.
If you won the lottery today, what would you do next?
This question allows you to remove the constraint of money and frees you to think about what you really want to
do without shutting yourself down because you don't think you have the resources to achieve it.
You wouldn't have made it this far in the greatness journey if you weren't looking to grow,
but oftentimes we shortchange our growth goals by making them too small. What if you thought big,
really big, where money was not an issue?
Go ahead and dare to dream.
These questions aren't exhaustive.
In fact, I encourage you to think of others to help you push forward and make courageous decisions.
Perhaps the most important thing you can do is to develop the habit of asking yourself courageous questions like these on a regular basis.
From stagnant to spectacular. I have known entrepreneur and real estate mogul Grant Cardone for over 12 years now, and he has been a guest on the School of Greatness several times.
He has an incredible resume, including authoring eight books, producing 13
business programs, acting as CEO of seven privately held companies, and appearing as a regular on huge
networks like Fox News and CNBC. And I can say with confidence that he acts with courage and
isn't afraid to ask challenging questions. He has shared some incredible stories with me, not the least of which
the story of how he lost everything and built it back tenfold. After a trauma like that, most people
would play it conservative and pad their emergency funds, but not Grant. Grant literally has the bulk
of his money invested. Now let that sink in. He has no savings. That
might sound outrageous, but Grant knows what he can do with his investments and his cash flow.
Clearly, he is an all-in type of guy. Yet a few years ago on an episode of my show,
I challenged him for thinking too small. At the time, his real estate business was bringing in millions, but I knew that
was not representative of Grant's talents. I didn't want him to settle, so I brought on the questions.
What would it take to get to a billion? I could see my question surprised him.
It's just not possible, he replied.
Well, you could probably guess how I feel about the impossible.
What do you mean it's not possible? I said.
I just don't have enough contacts anymore.
Okay, I said, well, what would it take?
Who do you need to meet?
Who has the money that you need to borrow?
I wouldn't let up because I recognized the limiting thoughts.
As I asked him the questions, I saw those limiting thoughts begin to dissipate,
and his mind opened to bigger possibilities right then and there.
Later, he told me that the interview changed everything for him.
He kept asking himself, how can I grow faster?
He realized his business was only reaching a limited, wealthier population.
It dawned on him that most of his own family members would not have the money to benefit from his business.
So he got started making a fund available to a variety of income levels,
where people could invest incrementally in larger real estate deals.
where people could invest incrementally in larger real estate deals.
Two years after that interview, Grant returned to my show as the proud CEO of a $900 million business.
Can you guess what I did next?
Well, Grant, what would it take to get it to $3 billion, I asked.
That's just not possible, he said. We don't have enough time.
Well, what if it was possible? What would
need to happen? After some thought, he started listing steps. Okay, I challenged him, but what
are you waiting for? And Grant made the impossible happen again. When I last saw him, his business
had blown past $4 billion.
And this time, I didn't even need to ask.
He told me his team is planning to top $40 billion within the next three years.
From impossible to $40 billion.
That's the power of courageous questions.
And they work for everyone. No longer a doctor. When we first spoke on my show,
Ali Abdaal was a part-time doctor in the UK, but his real passion had become that of being an
online creator. At the time of our interview, his YouTube channel had over 2 million subscribers,
where he focused on how people can lead happier, healthier, and more productive lives under the five pillars of health,
wealth, love, happiness, and impact. But not long after our conversation, he made the decision to
move completely away from being a practicing doctor. His move to becoming an ex-doctor
happened partly as a result of being asked
two questions that are variations of the ones we discussed earlier.
What would it look like if in the next 30 days you completely stopped being of service, hands-on,
one-on-one as a doctor? How would it make you feel right after you made that decision to stop practicing medicine?
Ali had essentially become a dabbler in the medical field.
There were a host of reasons it made sense for him to stay.
He had invested more than eight years of his life and many thousands of dollars into medical school.
Being a doctor was prestigious.
It's how he built his brand on YouTube.
Now I was asking him what it would look like to walk away. His response was fair and honest.
I think it would feel very scary, mostly for selfish reasons. I think even now I can still
convince myself that this YouTube channel, the business, everything else, is all just
a side gig. But with this side gig, he was pulling in multiple six figures, much more than he was
making as a part-time doctor. And by his own admission, he was helping more people as a YouTuber
than as a doctor. The fear of not having that old world prestige of medicine, which is not
quite the new world prestige of being a YouTuber, those fears are all selfish things. I wouldn't be
concerned at all about not having an impact on people because I know that I am. I'm not that
special as a doctor. Anyone in my position can do the same thing.
I could see that these questions were giving him lots to think about, so I threw a big concept out there. In a sense, you're doing a disservice by giving 10% of your time and energy to helping
people in an area you're not passionate about, as opposed to the people that really want to do it full-time.
That's an interesting way of looking at it, he replied. I hadn't quite thought of that.
I was very respectful of Ali, of course. I wasn't pushing him just to push. I just knew that sometimes you need someone to push you to make a courageous bet on yourself. Being a doctor is a noble calling, if it is your calling.
What I was hearing Ali say was that it was more about fear and sunk cost. He felt he was having
the most impact on the world with the work he was doing as an online creator. Over the course of the
rest of the show, we talked about several more questions related to his goals. If you had 10 million subscribers, would you continue practicing medicine?
What if you reallocated those 10 part-time hours a month working as a doctor to develop the next
program or focus on things to help your digital business expand? What type of impact do you think
you would make if you solely focused on your digital platform?
After our conversation, Ali asked himself even more courageous questions.
In fact, he shared a YouTube video a few weeks later where he walked through his decision to leave medicine for good.
Before he could make that decision, though, the questions he asked himself helped him get to the core of his
mindset. Some of the questions he had to nail down were, what if this YouTube thing doesn't work?
Why not stay a doctor as a safe backup option? What if people on the internet hate me for leaving
medicine? Will my channel and business die if I don't continue to call myself a doctor?
Will my channel and business die if I don't continue to call myself a doctor?
Why don't I do everything part-time?
Is the only reason I'm practicing medicine because I want to continue to hold on to this badge of being a doctor to set myself apart from most of the other YouTubers?
These are all fair and valid questions.
But in the end, he realized that he couldn't let fear hold himself back from his greatness goals. You don't have to be a doctor or YouTuber to use courageous questions to make a
change. Questions like these will help you get from where you are to where you want to be.
When you discover what you really want to do and eliminate the things that hold you back, you free up energy to go towards your passion.
I've seen it time and time again.
When people go all in on the things they love, magical things start to happen.
Maybe it doesn't happen right away, but greatness will eventually follow.
Courage in a question. Once you learn to challenge yourself and to silence the easy, lazy questions that pop up when you're trying to do something
great, you discover that questions aren't the enemy. Rather, the right kind of questions,
courageous questions, can quickly unlock something in you that's been buried deep within.
Courageous questions are focused and direct.
They expand possibility thinking while helping you eliminate distractions.
They help you zoom out and see things you may have overlooked.
They offer you fresh perspective and new horizons to explore.
Best of all, they create in you a bias towards action. Dreams of what could be someday suddenly become possible
today, and this often leads to an avalanche of momentum. What questions do you need to ask yourself to get started? Don't wait.
The world needs your greatness.
Engaging greatness.
Exercise.
Ask yourself courageous questions.
Let yourself dream of what could be.
It's time to dare to ask yourself and answer some courageous questions.
Invest some time into thinking about each of the courageous questions and jot your answers down in
the notebook or in your notes app. And as you do, you'll probably stumble across other questions
that scare you. Don't ignore them. Jot them down as well and take the time to answer them authentically.
Don't let preconceived barriers, fears, or negative thoughts hold you back.
Have the courage to dream about what could be possible for you in your pursuit of your meaningful mission.
The purity question.
If you were to be 100% authentic to who you are, what would you do differently?
The priority question. If you absolutely had to double your goal in the next 30 days,
what would be your first three moves? The possibility question. What would be possible
for you if you could insert the next step in your meaningful mission here?
The passion question, what would it feel like if you could achieve your goal, dream, or mission?
The prosperity question, if you won the lottery today, what would you do next?
List any other questions that surfaced.
If you need to, schedule time on your calendar to do nothing but think about each of them and answer them courageously.
Chapter 13. Give Yourself Permission
My friend Roger is a talented financial advisor who struggled
to break through beyond the commission threshold of $80,000 a year. He had a dream of building a
robust business, but just always seemed to end up getting stuck. He tried practicing on his own, with a partner, and then on his own
again. Nothing he did seemed to make any difference. He kept asking me, how can I work with clients who
have more money to invest? I sent him some referrals, but they weren't the big hitters
Roger was looking for. But then, an opportunity arose when a friend messaged me about a 19-year-old
man who had just won hundreds of millions in the lottery. As it turned out, one of the lottery
winners' latest tweets was about an episode of The School of Greatness. I reached out to the
young man to congratulate him and warn him of the challenges that would be coming his way.
the young man to congratulate him and warn him of the challenges that would be coming his way.
After all, about 70% of people who win the lottery go broke, become drug addicts, or die by suicide within a few years. I offered support and made myself available if he wanted to jump on a call
for guidance. He ended up taking me up on my offer, and over the course of several phone calls,
I learned his story.
Although he seemed to have a solid support team around him, I offered to connect him with my friend Roger and encouraged him to talk with other advisors as well, to make sure he had a
fiduciary in place to guide his financial decisions. He agreed. I went back to my friend Roger and
asked him if he'd be willing to have some calls with the young man, not selling him anything, just being of help and seeing where it might go.
He agreed, and before long, we had several calls take place among the three of us.
The young man also connected with several other professionals
before letting me know he really liked Roger and wanted to work with him.
Imagine my excitement when I called Roger to tell him the
great news. Dude, this is going to change your life right now because this client's going to
make you a multi-millionaire. And then he said something that totally surprised me.
I'm not ready for it. What? I gasped. What do you mean you're not ready for it?
I've never had a client that big. I don't know how to manage that much.
I practiced a little tough love here.
I'm telling you right now, I don't think I can be your friend if you're unwilling to
take this risk and take this on.
You've been asking me for years for bigger clients.
Now here I am helping you and you're telling me you can't work with him because you don't
feel ready?
Then I let him have it.
I can't send you business if you're not willing to go for it.
Why was I so annoyed with Roger here?
Because life was offering him an opportunity, one he had dreamed of and desired for so long,
but he was unwilling to give himself permission to take
it. He was living in self-doubt and fear, and this was keeping him from fulfilling his meaningful
mission. Roger agreed to think about the opportunity. After a few days, he decided he
would take on the new client, but with the help of another firm, one that would take 50% of the
commission to partner with him. That had the experience and resources for managing larger clients. And this partnership
gave Roger the comfort he needed at the start. But it only took a couple of years for him to
grow the confidence to manage not only the young man's financial matters, but also several other
bigger clients of his own. He then made 100% commissions instead of only 50%.
In a way, by bringing in a partner, Roger gave himself partial permission to succeed.
He didn't fully trust his abilities,
so he felt he needed someone else's credibility to take on bigger clients.
It was a step in the right direction because he was willing to act.
bigger clients. It was a step in the right direction because he was willing to act.
When he eventually realized the people he leaned on did not know much more than he did,
he had all the confidence to give himself full permission to go all in. And yes, we're still friends. A prison of your own making. It seems everyone is looking for permission these days.
of your own making. It seems everyone is looking for permission these days.
Whether it's from a therapist, coach, friend, client, or family member, we're all looking for someone to give us permission. As I think about our desire for permission, it seems there are
three forms you might need to give yourself on your way to accomplishing your meaningful mission.
To become your ideal, to eliminate, and to show emotion.
If you withhold permission from yourself in any of these areas, you set yourself up for problems.
One, give yourself permission to become your ideal.
A result of not permitting yourself to become your ideal is jealousy and insecurity.
I love how Gabby Bernstein expressed this idea.
Jealousy is a form of witnessing undeveloped parts of ourselves.
You might look at someone else and resent the qualities they reflect,
but nothing is preventing you from developing those same qualities.
but nothing is preventing you from developing those same qualities.
You just have to give yourself the affirmation and permit yourself to become your desired self.
As Seth Godin put it, so many of us are waiting to be picked.
Our cultural instinct is to wait to get picked, to seek out the permission, authority, and safety that comes from a publisher or talk
show host or even a blogger saying, I pick you. Once you reject that impulse and realize that no
one is going to select you, that Prince Charming has chosen another house, then you can actually
get to work. Once you understand that there are problems just waiting to be solved, once you realize that you have all the tools and all the permission you need,
then the opportunities to contribute abound.
Most of all, when you buckle down, confront the lizard, and ship your best work,
you're becoming the artist that you are capable of becoming.
No one is going to pick you.
Pick yourself. Our hesitancy to give ourselves permission to succeed is born out of fear, not from our greatness mindset in pursuit
of our meaningful mission. Two, give yourself permission to say no. When it comes to eliminating things from our all-too-cluttered lives,
a lot of people struggle with saying no because they feel they need affirmation from others.
It goes back to the identity issue.
Are you letting other people's expectations define who you are?
If you don't practice giving yourself permission to eliminate tasks,
you risk getting distracted with all the
tasks others ask of you. Successful people say no to some things so they can give a fully committed
yes to other things. My friend Rory Vaden is an expert on productivity. As the author of
Procrastinate on Purpose, Rory has developed an entire system for thinking about using time
effectively. As he puts it, when you have diluted focus, you get diluted results. In other words,
the more you try to accomplish to gain others' approval, the less you actually get done as time
gets away from you. You have to give yourself permission to eliminate things from your to-do
list and from your life so you can focus on what's most important to you. Three, give yourself
permission to show emotions. Can you think of a time when you did not permit yourself to feel the
full range of emotions you needed in order to heal your past? Maybe you
didn't give yourself permission to feel that pain because it was uncomfortable or awkward.
Gabby also speaks about this form of permission. She refers to a category of emotions she calls
impermissible feelings. She says everyone has endured some level of trauma, and within that trauma are often shameful feelings of inadequacy, rage, or self-hate.
People may avoid these feelings because it is the only way they know to protect themselves from past wounds.
But those coping mechanisms are often unsustainable.
They can lead to all sorts of coping behaviors or addictions that only hold you back from greatness.
You have to allow for entry into those memories and permit yourself to feel emotions if you want to come out on the other side of them.
You're in charge of you.
Stephen R. Covey is perhaps most famous for his book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.
Habit one is be proactive.
But I like the children's version that his son created even better for its simplicity.
You're in charge of you.
That simple expression, if internalized, can help you avoid the permission pitfalls we talked about earlier.
It means you have the power to navigate your way to greatness.
You don't need someone else to give you permission to do that.
The guiding principle in Covey's teachings is the difference between reactive and proactive attitudes.
Reactive people let their environment shape their story with language like,
I can't or I have to. They overlook how much influence they have on their circumstances.
Meanwhile, proactive people recognize they are powerless over certain aspects of their lives,
but they focus on what they can do in response to what comes their way.
Proactive people take responsibility for their story, and it all begins with giving yourself but they focus on what they can do in response to what comes their way.
Proactive people take responsibility for their story,
and it all begins with giving yourself permission to take charge of your greatness journey.
Taking charge means living intentionally.
For example, Rory Vaden teaches that the key to multiplying time is giving yourself the emotional permission to spend time
on things today that create more time tomorrow. He calls this formula the significance calculation.
It means you take command of your time and use it to do things that will save time in the long run.
Scheduling is not just about calendars and to-do lists.
Beneath our objectives are feelings of guilt, fear, anxiety, ambition, and drive.
Even if we aren't aware of it, these emotions factor heavily into all our decisions.
I seldom struggle to tackle a new challenge.
I'm usually raring to dive in right away.
Where I tend to struggle is giving myself permission to slow down or adjust my approach to achieve a goal.
For example, I felt a lot of guilt about this book when I didn't get it done as quickly
as I had planned.
It took me a while to realize that it's okay to push the deadline, that the priority was
making it great and not necessarily making sure it fit my self-imposed initial timeline.
When I took the pressure off myself, I became more excited about it. I think when people put
pressure on accomplishing their goals the perfect way, they often don't achieve those goals.
Successful people know to have internal flexibility and grace for themselves instead of beating themselves up over not being enough.
Above all, you need to know to give yourself permission to step up, step back, step aside,
or take whatever steps you need to in your journey to greatness.
Engaging Greatness
Exercise 1 – A Matter of Life or Death
It can be difficult to see beyond your own self-doubt.
It might even feel like we are being responsible or realistic when we discourage ourselves from big dreams.
This exercise will provide a new point of view by helping you to imagine the stakes are higher.
will provide a new point of view by helping you to imagine the stakes are higher.
Record your responses in your journal, notes app, or other place of your choosing.
Step 1. Choose a goal.
Think of a goal you have been wanting to accomplish but have not made progress toward and write it down.
Step 2. Raise the stakes.
Imagine you live in a society where only the most productive people are allowed to live.
Each year, a tribunal assesses each person's accomplishments and decides their fate.
Now it's your turn to be assessed.
They look at your list of accomplishments, but see you have failed to accomplish the main goal you set for yourself, the goal from step one above.
Someone steps forward to take you away.
You break out in a cold sweat, you fall to your knees and beg them for another chance.
After a few tense moments, they agree to give you one final year to make it happen.
But you have to submit a convincing plan for how you will do it.
Step three, make it happen.
Take 30 minutes now to write a plan to submit to the tribunal.
Take it seriously.
Your plan has to be realistic and convincing.
Whatever it takes, you must make a plan. The real price. Now, this scenario is
unlikely to ever happen in real life, but the exercise puts your time in perspective. You might
not lose your life by failing at your mission, but you may likely lose the kind of life you desire.
likely lose the kind of life you desire. Those are the real stakes, not as pressing, but I would argue as equally high.
Exercise 2. Grant Yourself Permission. Step 1. Choose a goal. Either use the
goal from exercise 1 or write down a new goal.
Step 2. Identify criticisms.
When you think about chasing after the goal you named in Step 1, what doubts arise?
Using the following outline, write the self-criticism preventing you from working toward your goal. I am not blank enough.
I am too blank. It is too irresponsible or selfish to go after this goal because blank. In my past, I experienced which type of trauma,
and that makes me feel afraid that blank. I should not feel.
Step 3.
Craft permission statements.
Using the following outline, create permission statements to combat the critiques you identified
in Step 2.
I give myself permission to control.
I give myself permission to control blank. I give myself permission to forgive myself for blank.
I give myself permission to list action needed to pursue your goal imperfectly.
I give myself permission to feel blank.
Fall forward.
We all have self-doubts.
We all lack certain skills or traits.
I wasn't a professional runner, but I ran a marathon.
I wasn't trained to be an interviewer, but I created a podcast.
I almost failed out of English class in high school,
but I am now a New York Times bestselling author.
You have to be able to say,
that's true, I'm not those things, but I give myself permission to do this anyway.
Maybe you fall, but you fall forward. And that is still progress in my book.
Own your mission. Just like we have to give ourselves permission to take imperfect action,
sometimes we have to give ourselves permission not to take action and focus elsewhere.
Remember your mission and permit nothing to get in the way of that mission.
Be your own source of affirmation because no one has the mission's best interest in mind more than you do.
I hope today's episode inspired you on your journey towards greatness.
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