The Sevan Podcast - #234 The News - James Hobart & Emily Abbott

Episode Date: December 20, 2021

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To get started, just open the app. It's as easy as that. See the PC Optimum app for details. Bam, we're live. Goodness. If you start talking, Hobart, like that, I just got to go live. Why? Just because you're taking away all the realism. Sorry, Emily, I start every show by chastising James.

I apologize that you have to see this. Oh, no, that's okay. It's actually a delight to watch that. I'm also just realizing I didn't look up any CrossFit news because I didn't really care. Come on, man. Well, you guys have been covering the Dubai Fitness Championships. I felt like I didn't have to talk about it.

Speaking of who cares about CrossFit news. Hi, Emily. Hi. I have Dave Lipson on tomorrow. He's not really CrossFit, though. I know that's what i mean speaking about who cares about crossfit he's doing like a whole different thing yeah i'm kind of excited what's he doing boom boom the same thing hobart does in the closet but doesn't tell anyone bodybuilding

ab crunches and curls that's not what i do in the closet not even close uh camille just did like a figure competition right yeah yeah i didn't even recognize her it's pretty wild oh was she did she get super lean super spray tanned yeah super susan can you pull up a picture of that he's muted i'm not letting him talk this show um look at our new graphic up there hobart that's the first time i've seen that no it's nice i like the yellow i like the you got to throw that couch out man what holy shit did you steal that from the set from the the crossfit old people videos no but you should see the desk i have

dude that's my mom's couch from her office when she was a lawyer. She hates you now. I honestly thought like Persian mom when I looked at that couch. You thought what kind of mom? Persian mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you're doing like this whole cute thing with your hair. I put, I cannot believe. How did you know I was talking to you?

Oh, sorry. I was talking to you oh sorry i was talking to you i can't believe how good i look today you look really good i couldn't fucking believe it it's my fasting day that's probably why i fucking look so good i gotta i did a little uh salt bike i did a bunch of push-ups that were inspired by dave lips and actually i did bench press as well as studying him and he basically there she is oh susan real quick emily before you react susan do you know emily emily susa hi emily good to meet you hi nice to meet you susan the producer of the show and the owner of crossfit livermore we met through the internet and through crossfit we like to work out it was e-harmony okay yes camille the fittest woman in the world of 2014 14 wow that's gnarly look at dave in the back what do you look at when you look at her do you look at her teeth

why are they that white oh i go to like her that that that I don't know what it is, but there's a part of her anatomy on her right leg, the left leg we're looking at. And then from there I look at her stomach and then I look at her boobs. I don't remember her boobs looking like that. And then I start tripping on the tan. What is that part of that anatomy on the leg? Like some sort of hip flexor? I think that's a sartorius.

Sartorius. Sousa. See, I told you that's why we picked Emily. Thank God. Sartousa. It's the longest muscle in the body. Well, maybe it's the longest muscle on her. It's not the longest muscle on me. I'm telling you.

What's the longest muscle on you? You know what it is, Omar. I actually have an article. That's not a muscle. I have an article. That's not a muscle. I have an article tonight about how the average penis length is over exaggerated. Well, let's start there then. You know the penis is important. We're not starting there.

I think we have 84 organs. I looked it up the other day. Do you know? Is that correct, Emily? four organs i looked it up the other day do you know is that correct emily that sounds like a lot to me but you know the the blood can be considered an organ it's connective tissue i don't think they're all essential organs i think there's like how many let me see how many organs of course suze is like can you guys just stay one topic at a time and i'll bring up some screen shit for you i don't want you guys to see suze is stressing i'm taking him away no no i like seeing okay he's back yes he's got those festive christmas things

what are the names of 78 organs of the human body there is many oh i mean what this is this is like woke science listen to the sentence here we go there are there are as many as 80 organs what do you mean as many? This is like science. Like, just tell me how many there are. That's not black and white, I guess. Listen, there's one girl on the show and three boys today. That's science. Fair?

Anyone want to argue that? I concur. Oh, Heidi. Just because Brian's not here, don't get lippy. You might as well just check out now heidi no brian's not making an appearance on this show oh man blow bart blow bart last time i was on the show they had a little um we all know you know you all right i can see it on the couch emily's like emily's like what did i sign up for you did i leave the penis pump out no just check it i mean i was down to talk about uh penis

length and the over exaggeration we will get to it we'll get there oh there we go. That's about the heaviest amount of science I have in tonight's news too. So if you're here for real news, sign off. There was a CrossFit Games athlete, a girl, woman, female, a vagina, that she took a picture of her bag, like of the stuff she was bringing to the games do you remember that oh i remember this bunch of stuff laid out on her bed like i know who this was too oh you do okay and it was her kit and in there there was a vibrator and then and then like as soon as people started pointing out in the comments the um picture came down but i'm thinking like i'm thinking it's kind of a good um

like that's a good pr move like just like you know like releasing a sex tape i just think like for some people it's just a good move well actually this is a really interesting conversation because let's segue here it's going to be three hours of interesting conversation emily how dare you female orgasm and athletes, like female athletes, need to understand that their orgasms are so potently powerful for boosting nitric oxide, and the vibrator

is the worst fucking... Can we cuss here? It's the worst way to, you know, explore your pleasure depth. Why is that? Why is that? That's music to my ears. But why is that? Why? If I said that I'd be a hater, and I need to know what nitric oxide is. Well, actually, I met a lot of CrossFit women that we would, I would talk about,

you know, pleasure and sexuality. And a lot of them would be like, Oh, yeah, I just use a vibrator, like quickly rub out a two minute clitoral orgasm done and then go in and you know lift some things which yeah sure that's great um but it ultimately that totally desensitizes a your clitoris and then b you don't ever understand the internal pleasures that are available to you uh even externally like more of your breasts or even your throat your mouth you know so it's just uh i feel like i i love that there was some sexuality in her kit and then that's part of her shtick but let's uh let's go deeper and let's cultivate some juicy pleasure for the female and if you if you need something that's just two minutes there's

tons of dudes out there tons no thank you emily says no thank you uh nitric oxide wait let me read that uh nitrate is this the same nitric oxide you're talking about emily nitric oxide is a molecule that produces naturally by the body it's important for many aspects of your health its most important function is vasodilation meaning it relaxes the inner muscle of blood vessels causing them to widen and increase circulation how did you use the word orgasm causes nitric causes that reaction causes a vasodilation yeah there well of course there's either a dopamine or depending on your level of pleasure an oxytocin release but uh nitric oxide is like they would say that's chi or prana the molecule of life and so when that circulates through your body it's complete like system down regulator

hence why after an orgasm you're like oh, Oh, everything is lovely. Like I can go out and flow in the world. Like, Oh, I can lift 300 pounds over my head. No problem. Um, you're in this state of flow, but, uh, you know, you're just not going to get that with a little vibration on your clitoris. It's just, you need something. There's so much more I'm saying, and you don't just want a quick dopamine hit all the time uh you want something long lasting it reminds me of like a bar you're talking about like when i come home and i just eat a bar and like while i'm eating a bar it's fucking great but when it's over there's only one thing i want another bar another bar yeah yeah and then here's the cycle of dissatisfaction and then basically disconnect from the power that is your genitals.

So, I mean, and men can do this, too. You don't need to do just like a little two minute, you know, pump session. I'm trying to I was actually just thinking, you know, if I should just like stop angrily tugging my root before I go do Fran. I'll just lay back and take my time now. That'll help my overall. I want that nitric oxide, acid boost. Nitric oxide, yeah. I want that. Hold on. Hey, so the lesson from this is, hello.

Uber Eats brings your food into your house. That's awesome. Look what my man just made me. Yeah, that was a straight out. Let me tell you. What is that glob of white stuff on there? It's cheddar, organic. And then we got some chicken on some cornbread with some backyard grown

mustard greens. Fuck. Yeah. Let me tell you what your man just really did. Siobhan's over there. Just sucking down 16 Laura bars. Let me tell you what your man really did. He just told all the dudes who are watching.

Yeah, you can watch her. Yeah. Yeah. You can watch it. That's it. You suggested that was a power move. Complete power move. Hey, he's, he's a power man he's a babe i bet you he fluffed that mustache before he came out he put a comb underneath it and pulled it out got it all poofy and

so so you can take your vibrator and your you can take your vibrator and your RX bars out of your kit now. I'm still stuck on this idea of like, Emily has just revolutionized the masturbation protocol for CrossFit Games athletes. And now they're all going to just pop positive for nitric oxide levels that are too high and everyone's going to get disqualified for performance enhancing masturbation. I'm blown away by that pandemic.

You start to see insane things happen on the field and this is why like i want all women of crossfit even men i can teach the men come to me i will show you like the yoni verse we're gonna dive deep and like i wish i knew this when i was an athlete but i was just living like you you know, surface, surface life. I think you got a weekend training camp on your hands here. Seriously. That is the goal. What are those called? CrossFit specialty courses. Oh God. That's such a good one.

I'm definitely getting fired for this, but I like it. You know how Kelly Starrett has that too, like a bag of like a ball and a stick and shit. And you can buy it from rogue. Emily needs her own just like bag of stuff. Oh, we just called the Wad Wad. The Wad Wad. Good. But seriously, like both men and women alike, like use masturbation, especially as an athlete, as a way to bolster performance and it go deeper,

you know, go slower, really start to feel into your body parts and use your breath to then circulate all that sexual energy, which is life force energy into your entire body. Just try it. Try it. You'll, you'll see what I mean. Is it, is it parasympathetic is that the right is that the good one uh well i wouldn't i wouldn't say that one is worse than the other it's just that most of us are mouth breathing um and disconnected from our root

uh and so we're constantly in a sympathetic state but i i you know when you look into polyvagal theory it just keeps going deeper and deeper and we don't know everything but ultimately to get it back into you don't want to always be in paris empathetic state either what you gotta back up you gotta understand my intellectual capacity what's polyvagal theory um it's just wait wait hold that thought before you go emily let's introduce emily to this part of the show. This part's weird. This part's really weird. Oh boy. Richard, hi, how are you? What's up, man? You know, just living the dream. Having a great hair day.

Yeah, sounds like it. Fasting with my homies, Emily, Sousa, and Showbart. Yeah, I just started listening in and my wife, for the first time, listened in. She said, this is provocative. You think Emily's here on accident you think emily's here on accident no no i checked her out earlier today i knew it was going to be a good one she's holding down the fort for kate gordon yeah man i just wanted to let you know i appreciate what you do man i'm calling to hype you up oh thank you i appreciate it yeah man good stuff good stuff

yeah even like the ufc end of, everything is all good stuff, man. Thank you. Thank you. That Jordan Levitt dude, he won this weekend, huh? Yeah. Wasn't that great? Wasn't that with an inverted triangle choke? That looked pretty sexual, by the way. That looked pretty provocative. And it was only the third time someone's been put unconscious in the UFC with an inverted triangle choke. No shit. I didn't know that. Yeah, that dude seemed seemed like a good dude too yeah i was happy to see him win he's quirky right he's like the sam dancer of crossfit yeah i dig him yeah man i dig him yeah i feel like you're like a little like a howard stern joe rogan crack baby man i like your stuff

thank you thank you yeah actually i am i am all right man i'll stop bothering you man i just wanted to call in and say what's up i appreciate Actually, I am. All right, man. I'll stop bothering you, man. I just wanted to call in and say what's up. I appreciate what you do. Yeah, you don't need to turn the show off if your wife gets really, really aroused. Just lower it. Just lower it.

Yeah, yeah. Turn it off. Okay. Yeah, no, no way. Definitely, man. I'm with you on that. All right. Thanks, Richard.

Thanks, man. Bye-bye. Oh, shit. I like when you cut them off you do yeah emily's so excited right now she's like because the whole time building up the 15 minutes before the show came on she's like do i really want to commit to this time what did i get myself into all this shit and i was like wow this is fucking gnarly we're off just we're running polyvagal theory okay talking polyvagal theory. Okay.

Yes. Polyvagal theory. Well, you know what? I actually, you know, someone to talk to about polyvagal theory would be Lindsay K. Matthews. I don't know enough about it to dive deeper into it. And I wouldn't, I feel like I wouldn't do it justice, but I'm just i've googled googled some things um by the way you don't spell polyvagal theory um p-a-u-l-y like i did hyphen v-a-g-e-l no you gotta go spell better than that i think it's just more basically it's like um it emphasizes the evolutionary

development of the two systems the parasympath, which is ultimately connected to the vagus nerve, and the sympathetic nervous system. Yeah, and there's a guy named Dr. Stephen Porges who's done a whole bunch of work on that, but that is something that I don't know enough about. Wow, the website here, I meant very well-mined, and there's some cool stuff here just from a quick look at it fellow canadian big easy nice to see emily on the show thanks craig oh where do you where do you see that you see the comments too so do you have it you have two windows open emily uh no i'm like on the same page oh and she can

see that too suza yeah yeah the guests can see the private chat in the comments oh i had no idea so they can see when the money comes in yes yeah i wish they wouldn't i wish they wouldn't see that because then then they're gonna want some of that oh. Oh, I've been keeping a ledger. Don't do it yourself, man. I like his afterwards. He's got a running title now. Did you watch the Jake Paul fight last night, Emily? No. Oh, I'm shocked.

I got a little stony and made it. It was like an arts and crafts night. Oh, what did you make? Like this really cool wooden thing for my room i don't know i found a log and i was like oh let's do something with this something like in five years you'll be like what the fuck and you'll throw it away i understand i got some of that around yeah sometimes you just gotta go for it, right? Holy shit, someone, how long have you been doing this show?

You didn't know we can see all the content. Shut the fuck up. Andy's back. Yeah, this guy, this guy, Colin Lawrence, he's a five to one ratio of negative to positive things. He's actually been sending me some pretty positive DMs lately. He's kissing your ass. I understand. I like that.

Oh, this is so good. I wish you guys could enjoy it. I'm craving cornbread right now since you said that. We could have a whole cooking segment of this show. We should? I just could. I'm saying we could. I don't really cook are you a cook hobart uh i like to cook yeah i don't cook i eat everything pretty much raw like i just will go into the refrigerator pull out a piece of turkey squirt mustard on it and eat it and if

i want cheese i hold cheese in the in the hand in my uh hand next to me and take a bite you know what i mean mix the two just running around all day sympathetic nervous system primed on the vinegar stroke that's you all day i don't know what any of that means but yes yes a vinegar stroke yes it's like no i'm not gonna oh god i haven't heard that since grade nine. Good God, James. Why? Tell me what's it mean? Well, I, you know, and you're like, I don't know. I'm not going to demo it. The vinegar. There's something called the vinegar stroke. Google that, Matt. What's what's a vinegar stroke, vinegar stroke.

And throw up the barbell jobs.com too. Cause I'm going to need that. Okay. Oh yeah. Here we go. Oh too because I'm going to need that. Because we're going to all this. Okay. Oh, yeah. Here we go. Oh, I was actually going to bring this up. The point during sexual intercourse for a man is irreversible, about to blow his load, the very worst time to have a seized coitus in an emergency. Oh, wow.

You know, like right that your eyes are about to spin back in your head 20,000 times, you know? Yeah, that's right before you say sorry. Your skills are skidding across the floor. That's what happens right before you say sorry, know? Yeah, that's right before you say sorry. Your skills are skidding across the floor. That's what happens right before you say sorry, right? No, that's so sad. No, actually, that's the time when you need to calm down. Take some, a big nasal breath. Yeah, look right into her eyes, become present.

And pulling up on the cremaster muscle and the bulbous spongiosis if you don't search cremaster muscle right now suze i'm quitting the show that is my my wife tried to touch my bulbous masturbius and i was like i don't don't push it on that we talked about that last week remember that yeah man i forgot she flipped your eject button and it blew your mind i this is the most i've been i'm so free masters and the bulbous spongiosis okay let's the cream the cream master muscle is found only within the male human body of course and covers the testes nothing covers my testes by the way the muscle moves the testes my testes don't have any i have no control of my testes they just dangle but no we'll talk more about that promoting healthy modal sperm the cremaster muscle lowers and raises the testes

in order oh yeah yeah yeah yeah sometimes your testes go inside you you got to push them out yeah the muscle pulls the testes towards the body to protect it yeah okay yeah that's it and to stop um master or you know from coming you pull up on those muscles along oh no wonder no wonder because i have no control over over pulling that muscle up that explains everything wow you mean you're not supposed to think about basketball that's what you think about no that's your go-to oh yes baby right as i'm about to right before the vinegar stroke because i have poor control over my cremaster muscles look at me i'm learning new

vernacular um i think about lebron wow can you pull can you can you do it now they do it they teach it in martial arts all the time i mean there's stuff i can wiggle around down there but there's like that's like a male it's like a male kegel right exactly yeah and women actually have a cremaster muscle too it's found in the inguinal canal um and that is what's activated during a clitoral orgasm which is why there's like a tensing so that's the involuntary muscle that that that feels like it's blowing the sperm out? Yeah, it's the reed marks like you said. But when I flex that, my balls don't go inside me.

Oh, well, you need to practice your kegels. Hey, that other article said that women don't have it. That's inaccurate? Yeah, that is inaccurate actually. There's a lot of inaccuracies when it comes to the female pelvis. Yeah, that doesn't surprise me. Yeah. That pretty much sums up my entire high school, college experience.

There's a lot of inaccuracies around viruses, too. There we go. You just watched with Joe Rogan, Peter McCullough? I did. I didn't watch all of it. I watched the first 20 minutes. I seen so much of Peter McCullough I did I watched the first 20 minutes I've seen so much of Peter McCullough for the last two years I was like alright alright And now everyone's an expert

Well no The experts are no longer experts Everyone else is an expert That was crazy There's a Logical fallacy in using someone's education

or position as a proof of concept or proof of point. I don't know what that is. Someone will probably write it in the comments. It's crazy. Because you spend a shit ton of money and time accumulating these accreditations to be respected.

So it's like forcing that or flexing that respect. Like, hey. And that shithole Harvard, did you see what came out today about them again? There's always something coming out of there. I didn't put them on my Google alerts. One of their top chemists over there was just caught for taking money from china holy did you get that article no argument from authority the fallacy is used when a person appeals to false authority as evidence for a claim yeah like guys this isn't this isn't the well the bible said well my doctor said i mean like like it's important like i care

what the bible says and i care what the doctor says but that doesn't mean like i'm pretty sure anyway never mind okay hobart google's trending searches for 2021 wait didn't we do this last week what we did yeah we did mother it's like that fear you have when you go to a birthday party and you bring a gift and everybody's opening the gifts and you just pray that they didn't get the same gift that you got no this is worse i love that because then you get to take the gift back that they got so you get a gift wait um hold on one second hobart you really and by the way that article was a fail last week well then we're skipping it because we can go right to dolly parton i like dolly parton all right hit it up let's go 75 years old presented with three new certificates

um from the guinness world book of records holds the records for the most decades um at number one with number one hits she has 25 25 on Billboard US Hot Country Songs chart. She broke her own record for the most hits on the US Hot Country's chart by a female artist with 109 hits. 2018, she was awarded the most decades with a top 20 hit on the US Hot Country Songs chart at six. Also made history-

Look, her dress is see-through a little bit look at oh scroll down to the next picture savannah love that okay i'm getting there go on wow is that her real hair that's great hair yeah that's a lot of woman. My God. Okay. She's the second most nominated woman for the Grammys behind only Beyonce. Parton was awarded the Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award 10 years ago, where Queen Bey, I think that's Beyonce, has 79 nods and 28 wins to her name. What's your favorite Dolly Parton song?

Go. I don't have one. Oh, that says a lot about you. 9 to 5. 9 to 5. They mention that in the article. That's the only one I know. I'm sure I know some other ones. What? Jolene. Jolene. I do know that song. Jolene.

Jolene. Sousa, don't. Don't, Sousa. We'll get demonetized. Don't you fucking dare. Don't you fucking dare. I'll pull up some YouTube. Yeah. Top Google searches query worldwide during the second quarter of 2021.

I would say some of the top how-to bee searches were kind of interesting. Yeah, that's what you did. I think that's why you fucking shit the bed last time. Because you started bringing up these obscure words. Does your mom ever get mad? Does your mom ever say Sevan's mean to you? No, she just says you got to tone it down sometimes. Oh, yeah.

Wow. She sounds like my mom. And what do you say when you say that? What do you say? Yeah, you're right, mom. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. You're right.

I wish I wouldn't have asked. I like that one of the top searches for 2021 was how to be more attractive, how to be happy alone. How to be a baddie. how to be a good boyfriend. Why not? How to be a good girlfriend. I don't even know what the word baddie means. How to be a good kisser, how to be a flight attendant. I think you said that last time. I think we looked it up. I can't believe this one is so low. How to be happy with yourself.

Anyway, moving on. Are these scrapped though? Because I feel like people must be searching like really strange things. Yeah. Like how to have a 25 minute deep pleasure orgasm or cream master. How to start. Where is my cream master?

Yeah. That's what I'd be searching for. Oh man. Robot chefs. Colin Lawrence is, he is not letting up. No, it's he,

this is all he does. Hey, um, um, I liked your presentation of the Google searches better this week. That was nice. Well, I didn't do it last week. So how are you happy with yourself?

I'm pretty happy with myself. Yeah. Yeah. How do you, how'd you achieve that? How'd you arrive there? Leaving the main empire. I try to prioritize doing things that i enjoy and make me feel good you know that's been that's been a big project this year focusing on those things getting out of austin maliolo spencer hendels and rich froning shadow exactly i've never stood in

maliolo shadow he's five foot man. He's shorter than you. I actually had a really fun year exploring my relationship with my wife. We moved cross-country. Going through the process of buying a house. Spending more time learning new skills together. She started skiing again this year. I've been teaching her on a mountain

bike and those things are really fun. You're the last true family man. and I've been teaching on a mountain bike, and those things are really fun. Yeah. You're the last true family man. Thank you. I don't know about that. I think she's talking to me. Oh, yeah, you're right. I appreciate that.

No, that's awesome. Name one thing that you love to do and would be unexpected for people to know about that, to know about you. What do I love to do and would be unexpected for people to know about that to know about you i love to do unexpected i don't know exfoliate he exfoliates every three hours he does some skincare treatment to his face every three hours i need to he shaves three times a day no no chemical peels. I don't really use any treatment on my skin. That's good. And we pretty much did only cold showers this year.

What? For a lot of this year. Wow. Actually, I really don't like hot water. Like, I really... Go ahead, Hobart. Get that. Go ahead, buddy. No, it's all right.

No, please. I don't know. Yeah. Well, tell us who was that. I love cooking. I love to cook. Who was that? I could see that. I was going to say, actually, I could see you drinking wine and listening to something like operatic. Oh. You know, cooking some shallots.

But I don't, doesn't even use sun on his skin. I do, man. I have two shades. That's just ivory or lobster. Like I try so hard. He looks like he sleeps in a fucking coffin. Yeah, Craig. I love listening to Huey Lewis in the news and designing my business cards.

No, yeah. I really love to cook. I also think though, it's cause like my wife, it's either just by blind faith or she just doesn't want to tell me like, she's so appreciative of my cooking. It's either just by blind faith or she just doesn't want to tell me like she's so appreciative of my cooking. So Cassandra is like one time, though, she made herself an omelet and I looked at how much pepper she put on it. And she's like, oh, it was like it was a pepper omelet. I mean, it was disgusting.

The ground pepper, not like chopped up garden peppers or bell peppers. And I tasted it. And after I ate that, I was like, if she thinks this is good, my cooking could possibly be horrific. Wait a second. But there's two things going on there. If you wouldn't have seen how much pepper she put in, would you think it's bad? Yeah, it was bad, man. It was a lot of pepper. It was like she was trying to preserve that omelet as she took a boat across the Atlantic to settle a colony or some shit.

It was a lot. This can be really sexist, but what I'm about to say, but whatever. I just can't. That just doesn't seem like a female thing to do. I'm trying to think like usually like I feel like it's dudes who put on pepper. Yeah. Maybe she was trying to make you happy. She was trying to push on your crow master.

Yeah. I'm going gonna ask her to again yeah let us know how that goes with the follow-up i will uh tell her to get into the bulbous spongiosis as well is that the spot behind that's the spot between that's the acreage between the anus and the scrotum. Yeah. Yeah. That's the part my wife tried to push on like 20 years ago when we first did it. I was like, don't ever touch down there again. When I'm when I'm doing my thing, you just chill. She pushed on that and you sprained your ankle. oh boy yeah but you but but i do but i do think it's important to anyway now i'm not gonna tell you but there's a time to push on that thing um yeah i would say like every day you could palpate palpate it gently because you know what's above that it's your prostate yeah you should milk anything

that's yeah i agree i agree it's like you should bring everything to the end at least a few times a day make sure everything gets out yeah totally yeah yeah and men should really have one good strong erection every day for health how about two even better oh okay good just as long as it's not like it's strong like is there like a is it like you can do fran with 95 pounds under five minutes like you can hold a luxury towel up like what is like a strong you know like i have an idea what one is it's relative for everyone if it's luxury towels is your metric go for it you know like savon sets like a dish towel on his and it flips out you know it's like flips into the ground hey if i push down on mine i just go face face first it just breaks you in half it's so strong just smashing me one time i was putting on the 38th towel and it just breaks you in half it's so strong just smashing me one time i was putting

on the 38th towel and it just fucking wham i fell on my face and broke my nose just teetered me over amazing oh emily look what you've done to this show it's not normally like this it's usually all business i know i'm sorry i feel like my i do have a one-track mind and it is in the realms of sexuality so does hobart oh i really like birds i'm obsessed with um raptors and where we moved like we drive to work every day i see like multiple um hawks which is really cool i think birds are pretty amazing that's probably something not a lot of people would expect i thought you were going to segue into a news story for crying out no we got some good animal stuff nothing on birds this time but i did a story about a robot chef i saw golden eagle

in you did that one last week too dude what are you doing i didn't do that story i know i'm just fucking with you um i saw golden eagle on a bridge in santa cruz the other day that was pretty cool yeah it's really cool oh but you did a robot on a bridge in Santa Cruz the other day. That was pretty cool. Yeah, it's really cool. Oh, but you did a robot last week. I didn't do the news last week. It was Kate.

Oh, the news last week. All right. All right. All right. Um, I was going to ask Emily what she does for fun and to make herself feel happy with herself. Oh, ma'am.

Probably go surfing or go engage in nature in some way. Definitely cooking great food. And what's one that's kind of unexpected? Oh, that's a good question i just like nerd out well if i told you really i don't know if it's appropriate for this show so oh that's what i think it was savon wouldn't be able to take it yeah exactly so we can skip that question fair let's go with that robot chef robot chef let's hit it so wait a second so i just want to just clarify real quick so there's something that the question you asked hobart was what do you do that brings you happiness that's that people wouldn't expect and he said and he whatever he said i blocked out i was looking at

google searches for 2021 birds yes birds yes and then um and then he asked you and you said um nature surf um nerd out which is like i don't know program in html or something and then and then it went to then you look back over your shoulder at something that's like just out of frame and you're like well and, it wouldn't be appropriate for the show. And I just picture there's like some dude tied up in the corner over there. And that's what you do. Okay. Oh, my goodness.

This is a family show. Yeah. Maybe if I come on another show, we can get that out. Oh, I like that. I like that. I like that.

Last week we talked about, or two weeks ago when Hobart was on the show, we talked about, what was the, what was that movie? And then we'll never mention again the rest of this show. Centipede. Oh,

the human centipede. Yeah. Oh, see, even she knows. Yeah. Yeah. Right.

I actually watched that this morning. She's done. I just wasn't feeling myself and I had to level up. Just get your mind right. Yeah. I usually watch that and I'll watch American Psycho and then Veggie Tales. And I'm like, all right, I'm going to start my day. Oh my goodness.

Well, I don't know what VeggieTales are, but. It's like a kid's show about vegetables that talk. Hey, we looked how much that show's made, American Centipede and, or whatever it's called. It's made like $600. Yeah, it's like, it was $284,000. It made me feel so good how little money it's made. It's like, no one should purchase that or watch that or talk about it on their podcast.

Yeah. How did you stumble across it? And then I'll leave it alone. How did you – did you just see it on iTunes on accident or – Me? No, no, no. I'll ask you very few questions on this show. I sought it out.

Oh, I used to be like a horror film junkie and then realized that television is like super poisonous. And so I think I watched like a trailer once and I was like, I can't watch that. That would forever scar me. And how about how there's a part two and a part three?

No. Yes. Who's doing this? Me. I funded all of them. It's a great first. Honestly, James Hobart, I knew the first time I met you that you were some kind of psychopath. Oh, can I hear about the first time you guys met? I think it must have been in Boston or something.

Yeah. But I knew it was the way he walks, his way he holds himself. Psychopaths and heroes are on the same branch. There you go. You know, so it really doesn't take much to blow one way or the other. And tell me more. So you saw him, was it at a seminar? No, I think it was like the training grounds that they used to do remember oh yeah like the reebok yeah training grounds yeah yeah and there's something just you know it was real off-putting

i'm totally kidding but i did i like it i could go into some deep thoughts. I'm like, hmm, I wonder what that guy's about. There's something in the way he holds himself. I know. Yeah. Is this a good time to interject and say that I'm following up on what you said earlier about Yoni eggs? And this is what I should have had a news story on. Yeah, Yoni eggs. And this is what I should have had a news story on. Yeah. Yoni eggs.

I could talk so much about Yoni eggs. Didn't you go to Mexico recently and do your 7,000th deep dive into the Yoni? Yes. This was the deepest I've ever been though. Yeah. Yeah. I'm still coming down from that. But maybe you should get into what's

that thing when people jump into caves spelunking spelunking yeah i think it's just spelunking savann whatever she can call what she wants but what are your passions uh the yoni and spelunking i mean they just seem like they're so beautiful beautiful. Yeah. I would love to do that. Here I am birdwatching and previewing the human centipede three times a day. Oh God. I gotta get fixed. What does, oh, I'm going to read that. Hold on a sec, Sousa. And we'll get Emily's response to if this is accurate or not.

What does a Yoni egg do? And we'll get Emily's response to if this is accurate or not. What does a yoni egg do? The egg harnesses the power of energy for sexual healing and is also used for crystal healing and kegel-like exercises. Along with sexual healing, yoni eggs also help in emotional, physical, spiritual transformation and help strengthen vaginal muscles. April 29th, 2021. End of message. Wow. Is that accurate?

What is it? It's a rock? You stick it in your twat? That's the scientific definition. Yeah. Fuzzy rock. People get lost in those technical terms yeah here's the thing um okay yes from like a physiological level like yeah you're or a physical level let's say you're

you are strengthening tissue but for most women um and they don't know this and this is why diving deeper into the yoni cave is kind of like whoa whoa, it just, you go too deep sometimes. But basically most women have way too tight of levator ani muscles and men have levator ani muscles too, but these levator ani gets so tight and most, and I'd be so curious to, you know, get some feedback from CrossFit women because of all the lifting that we do. And this stuff needs to be released. It needs to be massaged and released just like any other muscle in the body. And then what you can do once those muscles are dynamic is you can go in there with your rock and go into your beautiful pussy. I wouldn't call it a twat. A twat's like a little guy that's like,

hey, you know, like giving you shit. Yeah. I didn't use the word twat's like a little guy that's like hey you know like giving you shit yeah i didn't use the word twat did i you totally did twats wear vests i'm just curious for the definition yeah the ones i've come across have i don't wait someone someone validate that did i use the word twat how did i use where i don't like the word twat either i use the word twat no you don't know maybe i said it's a rock you put in your twat damn okay i thought rock you put in your beautiful pussy sorry sorry yeah into your gorgeous yoni and then you can actually start like articulating those muscles and waking up the tissue all in your bacterial canal ah yeah yeah. And so then you, once you start to wake up all those tissues and you have all this,

you have way more sensitization and pleasure. You can then start circulating that pleasure, which is again, like I spoke about life force energy and in throughout your body and harnessing that power, that healing power, um, magnetizing things towards you um you know making men

just fall down as you walk by now i'm maybe maybe does it have to be what's what's the rock made of the the the pousse rock uh i'm trying to try to compensate for saying twat earlier Crystals Like just a crystal Do different crystals do different things? Like if I have one that's made out of I don't know A granite crystal Or an amethyst crystal

Or like a jade crystal Yeah Absolutely So jade is more like a masculine energy so it's gonna like really ground you down um then there's like a yeah there's a jade i'd like to see you put that in your asshole bart honestly i'm yes tell him emily men need to really get in touch with their anal health. And women, too. How do I do that?

I'm blown away right now. I'm all in. Honestly, go find someone in your area that's reputable. Probably, like, a physical therapist is the best place to start. But, you know what? Actually, no. Screw that. It's your body.

And, like, it's your butthole. Why is there so much shame around it why do you want to avoid it um it needs because wait hold on i want to answer that question because poop comes out of it go on because i ate two bowls of ramen last night okay well maybe not have but even then it's just like it's just poop it's your own feces like you can wash your hands after, you know? Why are we so scared of it? Audio is BBJ sponsored. And someone says, oh, but does it cure COVID?

Honestly, I really do truly feel that the more women get in touch with their pleasure and they understand that they can go deeper and that most of the ailments that are like bothering them or suffering from are not necessary that these can be eradicated purely through getting to know your own pussy the world would say we'll say we'll say but yeah okay in terms of you james how about go into the shower you know you can even just use a little bit of soap or use maybe like some lube on your finger and start feeling around all those anal sphincters. There's like three rings. Don't scratch off any polyps.

If you feel a polyp, don't scratch it off. Just be chill. Be gentle. Be gentle. Hey, guys, I'll see you. I got to go. I got to go shower. I haven't showered yet today.

Coconut oil is also a great medium. Oh, yeah, yeah. I wonder if Richard Hawes is still, if him and his wife still think the show is provocative. I wonder what happens. Okay, but I'm also just going to interject here. For those that need to tie this in with, like, okay, why would I want to touch my butthole? Is that we have this pelvic diaphragm, right? We also have an upper diaphragm, right? So, yeah is that we have pelvic diaphragm, right? We also have an upper diaphragm.

All right. So yeah, we got this pelvic diaphragm and this, when you breathe in the pelvic diaphragm and your diaphragm move together. And what happens with most athletes, most men and women, and actually any like NARP gone, you know, walking around NARP is a non-athletic regular person. Wow. That's such a good term. Wow. Wow. gone, you know, walking around. NARP is a non-athletic regular person. Wow. Wow. Wow. So what happens is that, that it gets jammed, right? Because we, the way we sit, the way we hold our sphincter muscles, all of those muscles around the pelvic bowl, um, get so tight, like the obturator internus, the obturator externus, the transverse perineal

muscles, those all need to be released. And when you can start releasing them, then that diaphragm begins to become dynamic. And guess what? You can then have way more breath retention, way more cardiovascular endurance, and just feel generally like unstuck. It's like totally applicable, you know? Holy cow, you took 10 seconds off your fan time. Yeah, I've been fingering my anus quite a bit lately. Honestly. Hey, I had a guy stick his finger up my ass.

Get a prostate massage. That may be the last frontier. And he stuck his finger up my ass. What did Dave say when he did that? And it felt like I had to take a shit. I really did not like it. And the only thing that kept me grounded was, well, he must hate this worse than me. And then this motherfucker says to me, hey, I think everything's fine, but your prostate didn't feel perfectly round.

So I just wanted to send you to a specialist like motherfucker. And so I go to the specialist. He's like, take down your pants. I got to check your prostate. I'm like, other dude already sucked his finger. So I know I have to feel it, too. It's like, listen, listen. And he sucks finger.

I felt just like it did the first time. Like I had to take a deuce and I didn't. I didn't. Yeah. Like not a fun deuce. So. Yeah. Urgent.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So next time i'm going straight to the expert just one yeah but here's the thing here's the thing so so i don't have any i besides soaping my butt and like i'm not like it's i your wife can do it it's like this should be then it won't feel like i have to take a shit yeah and if it because why do you feel like it that's a

response like get that finger out of my ass because a doctor just put on a glove and put on lube and then shoved it up your butt this is like talk to me he was trying to like have casual conversation with yeah like fuck that like your butthole is sacred and i if i was there i'd be like you're gonna like spend time to warm it up you're gonna like you know make put me into a parasympathetic state my wife my wife used to like you my wife used to like you now you keep going down this aisle trying to get me to talk her into massaging my butthole she's gonna hate you hey man i'm here to rewrite narratives and the butthole needs a whole rewrite major helmet out of the three of us here hobart susan myself i'm not gonna like this

question am i no you're not most likely one uh which one of us is going to have a talk with our wife after the show wow because he looks like the guy from... I can tell he's blushing and it's like he's already been there. Wow. Like he wants to take over and be like,

actually, he wants to bond with you right now, but he can't because he knows me and Hobart judges shit out of him. And he'll lose three clients at his gym. Let's hold it back. We'll have a conversation after the podcast. I'll text you on the side. Yeah, I'll be you on the side.

Yeah, I'll be here. It's a really great topic. He pulls up a bag that has 15 yoni eggs in it. He has all the crystals. And that's the kind of thing that Rogues should sell in that kit. Oh, that's a good idea. Oh my god, I'm going to create a kit this is a yeah why

don't that's like i was just gonna ask if you have a book or do you have like a the emily abbott yoni kit um i do actually have yoni eggs but like i don't like to just hand them out because like i said most women have no business yet uh if they haven't done any yoni work to just put a rock up their yonis when those muscles are so tight once they achieve i can teach them how to achieve a certain level of dynamicism then you can start that's when you become empress level but before then you're just like you got to figure it out you got to get your like can you put the rock in like facing one way and then you flex the muscles and you do some shit you turn around and you get it out going the other way um i mean you can definitely go no hands but i've never done that i might try it's like hobart it's it's like juggling like you

need to juggle you need to juggle with tennis with beanbags then tennis balls then then fire like comment of amazon searches are going to go bugging sideways tonight. Please don't get one on Amazon. Please don't. Okay, don't buy one on Amazon. Will you pull that up, Susan? Let's see what kind of eggs there are on Amazon.

We're going to show you people where not to buy one. Don't buy one there. You have no idea where it came from. I still have up the Levantor Annie Levator Ani. And even with the picture,

I still can't figure it out. That's okay, Siobhan. I think we should, me, you, and your wife should all meet up. Yeah, with a coloring book. Exactly. And some coconut oil yeah the world awaits you oh i like how they're strings attached to me in case in that case you lose it you can't lose it

okay see i don't know shit yeah you don't it's not like the vagina just like opens up into like your chest cat you know it's like i've actually asked me that fall out of your mouth it sounds like if i do a handstand while i'm using a yoni egg well it gets stuck in my nose yeah see these i mean i just wouldn't you know i only want high quality things wait look at this kegel exerciser machine it's like it like measures that click on that thing measures this your strength wow for women and men oh it's a stimulator okay okay to probe the bladder yeah they actually have ones now where you put a kegel machine up your vagina and it's attached to an app and then they play like music and uh but again like you can't tighten already tight muscle muscles right we don't want more hard we want soft opening blooming pussies when we're living in a hard pussy world we gotta change that we want dynamic juicy pussies not

yeah dehydrated beef jerky pussy yeah yeah yeah yeah that was a good analogy yeah you want it like a sponge that's just been just sitting in the sink you don't need to add anything yes yes yes you want like just like you know like a ragsman's like you wash your car and you leave the rag in the in the water and then a month later you come back and it's just like, you know, like a ragsman, like you wash your car and you leave the rag in the water. And then a month later, you come back and it's just like just every fiber. So when you pull out, you're like, how the fuck am I going to get this in the house to the washing machine? That's the kind of pussy you want. No, Savant, that's way off.

I'm telling you, it's hydrated. Like a double, double animal style. You might have a progesterone problem that's the case i told when emily was on this show i said something about the you want the pussy to be just like look like just a big juicy hamburger she's like we could come up with better imagery the blooming flower was really nice and as as a casual observer. Oh, you definitely finger your anus. Okay. And there's nothing, you know what?

And you're going to get your sixties, James. Yes. And you're not going to have any prostate issues. Great. That's what I'm all about then. Yes. Devon's already got him. He's up five times a night peeing.

Yes. Yes. Five of a melon. That was a dahlia. That's one of my favorite flowers. Not that one. Oh, you're, you know about flowers. My was a dahlia. That's one of my favorite flowers. Not that one. Oh, wow. Oh, you know about flowers?

My mom's a gardener. Oh, wow. Oh, that's why your mom and I bond. I'm a gardener. Yeah, I really want to get you the avocado tree we have because it's enormous and it just doesn't fit in our house. I think you could plant it outside. Will you take a picture of it for me? I'll have her send you a pic, yeah.

Hmm. Look at all the versatility. Nature's amazing. So is your pussy. Yeah. That's a great, just that should be the, whatever the tagline for the show is tonight, that should be it.

Oh. Nature's great. Mm-hmm. So is your pussy bang macaroni in a pot oh my god no people we're going down the wrong alley here let's uh let's clean it up is that true is that really one of her? Oh, she does talk about the pH balance of vaginas being off because of bad diets. Cardi B does? I think so. Cardi B does?

I think there's a video on that. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Good for her. Good for her. Good for her. There you go, Thomas Owens. All right.

Take control of the show, Hobart. Yeah, what are we at? You're letting our guests just run amok with the pousse. Robot chefs, if you don't want to cook, if you don't have a strapping, talented gourmet like Emily's man, you can buy a robot chef. Multiple tech firms now developing these robot chefs, and they can cook more than 5,000 recipes.

They partnered with a top chef. They recorded his movements in a similar kitchen environment and then programmed them into the robot. Bullshit. Yep. similar kitchen environment and then program them into the robot bullshit yep and these robots start at a nice i don't know 150 000 british pounds which is about 200 000 us dollars there's already a pizza chain in france where their robot makes you pizza and it has a 4.4 rating out of 5 on facebook so hey that that that that's bullshit the movement thing shut the fuck up let me let me see something they can make is there a video this thing there's a pizza one already they have safety radar systems detect any unwanted impacts between the robot and the surface and immediately stop the operation.

Safety first. I can't wait till they get these things out and they just start throwing knives at people. Hey, what do they do to prevent that thing from spreading the virus? Does that thing wear a mask? Does it wash its hands? What's the deal with that? It's vaccinated. Oh, good.

Thank you. Man, well, I mean, because, you know social isolation uh is already an issue but let's just get a freaking robot in your kitchen i'd like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a glass of milk at um 42 degrees please okay what about that element of love you know when you put love into cooking? Like mom's home-cooked meal? I have family members from the old country who would never go out. They would never eat anything if they didn't know who made it. Wow.

They will not. And they've been in the United States for 20 years, yeah. Where did this thing go? I can't wait until we don't even have to interact with other human beings no i'm being sarcastic but i'm i'm interested to see how crazy it makes us i can't believe you admitted that hobart what that you're being sarcastic yeah it's like a magician who just showed me their trick well you know i always think about it like it must have been like what a mind fuck it would have been for people who uh you know went from horse to car like the horse to car evolution that must have been so hard how about the first dude

who got on a horse how about walking the horse yeah right but then we're now merging biology and technology in such a way that um you know and they say that the metaverse is going to be like irresistible and that's yeah it's terrifying but there's got to be some good things right and then there's also got to be a bunch of horrible things just like cars really you've heard the metaverse described as irresistible one more time i think i i think i could resist the metaverse i don't know i don't know what it's going to be about but like you're going to be able to feel things that you possibly couldn't feel in this reality uh i i think it's the other way around but but but hobart you're a total different breed dude you're not normal i knew that the first time i met him do you think they have they'll have a program in the metaverse that simulates the human centipede just curious just asking for a call anytime emily's overly nice to hobart she hobart has

to throw something like that like hey get back get back girl back yeah i don't know i like the idea of at least believing a little bit that what i'm observing is something i am observing on my own i don't like the metaverse as an intermediary. Are you observing it on your own? Well, I mean, I it's, I think it's closer than my point is don't know,

but it's closer than maybe the metaverse would be. Have you ever heard Elon talk about how we might already be in the metaverse? Yep. Yeah. Well, that's the whole, what Malbranche is, Malbranche is demon.

The whole, you know, Just be controlled by malevolent being in a giant simulation. Mal who? Mal who? Malbranche. Branche. Branche. I think it's his demon. I could be wrong on that.

Well, hey, if I'm in a metaverse, I'd be way more accommodating to having my anus uh probed maybe you'll finally have a good relationship with your anus in the metaverse like a positive one yes yes oh sorry no it'ses, not Melbranche. Sorry. It's Descartes too. Oh my God. Colin, you're slipping. I can't believe you didn't correct James in the comments for confusing Melbranche with Descartes. You're so smart. I do worry about digital relationships, though.

I feel like there's a limit on how much of that kind of interaction is good for us. Like this? You know what's wild? Go ahead. Like this? What are you referencing? I think this is a good example. Not having corporeal face-to-face.

If I can't reach out and touch you, I think there's something really important about being in that kind of space with somebody else and i don't have any evidence or studies or other than just like my own anecdotal experiential feeling like or just a step down from this would be like experiencing a relationship with you like through a dm or experiencing a relationship with you just by following you on a social media account. Yeah. Yeah, I agree. And I think that, again, because there's just been this systemic disconnection from what is real, that when you go to start doing real things like slaughtering a chicken or an animal for food or like hunting or uh being with someone who's dying being with someone who's giving birth um being with someone

who's i don't know having a huge emotional response it's like those are that's like where the the real stuff is that's the most real thing you can do and we've lost that or like slowly be with yourself. Centrally, we've lost all that. And maybe this is the wake up call to come back to it. And on a different anecdote, my man is not he's like basically a Luddite, like doesn't really participate in any, like electronic world. And we did our we had a zoom call the other night and that was his first experience with zoom calling and he was like i know he was like and after he was like why did that person like put stuff up behind him like to almost like represent who he was as a human and like a shitty couch you know and uh it really like it actually kind of tripped him out because he's like what

like why i don't want to be a part of that like i'm really offended that you refer to him as your man you know he's his own man. You don't own him. Oh, of course not. But I hate saying boyfriend because he's not a boy. Don't take me seriously, Emmy. Don't take me seriously, Emmy. A Luddite, one of a group of early 19th century English workmen destroying labor-saving machinery as a protest. Wow, you're smart. that's like a lot of word yeah luddites man um emily people don't even know what's real and not real though like what like

there's this whole thing hey go out and connect with nature this that this people use words of shit that they think is real that's not real like people think that there's things of course i could be regurgitating all types of concepts but what the most pragmatic thing is to go out and experience it yourself whatever that means to you you know for some people it's like riding in a really cool car that they've spent a lot of time with their son building or something like that for me it's like where did you meet your man at where did you meet your luddite my luddite um i was driving to the pet store to right in ocean beach where i live which is like so it's right next to the ocean and he was coming out of the surf you know he's big manly surf man and there was instant energy between us like just he locked eyes um i locked eyes and then

so you're in your honda civic in san diego california and you look out the window and there's some dude getting out of the beach and you're like, boom. And you felt your yoni egg do a backflip? I actually drive a Ford Transit Connect XLT. Okay. Sorry. And he actually thought that I was his best friend who owns the same van. And so he like went to like go like kind of scare the person in the van that person was me and then we just like connected and he was coming out of the surf and changing out of his wetsuit so i got a little got a little looky look and uh yeah and that was it that was it and so so So you were in your car and you were moving slow through traffic or something or in a parking lot that's near the beach.

And he came up to the car thinking it was his friend. And is his friend a girl or a boy? A boy. Okay. And then he pulls up and then he goes, ha! And then you go, ah! And he goes, oh, shit, sorry. I thought you were someone else. then you go, ah. And he goes, oh, shit, sorry. I was like, who's this man? Yeah. Go pull him in.

I thought you were someone else. And you go, it's OK. What's your name? Well, he just looked at me for a long time. And then I walked into the pet store. Yeah, there's my van. Oh, that thing is really cool. Yeah, the bottom white one, like the white one.

Yeah, that one. It's kind of old school. It's fun. I have a bed in the back. I was going to say, I bet there's a bed in the back of that. Yeah. During when COVID hit, me, Sam, and Jen Dancer all went camping together and just hunkered down. And that was my ride.

I bought it four weeks earlier. Hey, is your license plate Yoni Love, L-U-V? Y-O-N-I-L-l-u-v oh my god i'm totally okay that's a great idea i've had two you guys are so um creative i have all these like ideas now i like a pleasure kit and a license plate that's happening don't forget the weekend masturbation camp yeah matt that's a great idea i like the idea of sexual rehab for athletes so that's good yeah it needs to happen and why is it only for athletes well because i don't like to work with unhealthy people stay away from the narps because i don't like to work with people who don't give a shit about their bodies well i just think for athletes female athletes even male athletes is an untapped resource it's an untapped resource and it's always glossed over you won't find any practitioner who treats that area and um it's never talked about why it's crazy wow no practitioner

who treats that area no and i unless it's like burning unless you're like peeing blood well yeah and i i remember going to so many competitions where i saw girls lifting and then peeing right like that's severe like bladder incontinence you're messing with the sphincters sphincter sorry there's only one in men have men have two but yeah like what's that about and why is that like normalized or just pushed to the side i have to go pee yeah man hey while you're in there, lube up. Yeah. Check it out. Massage that sphincter.

The sphincter. I like the idea of the holistic health approach. Yeah. I think it will, in the next 10 years, and this is why I got into this field, the next 10 years and this is why I got into this field the next 10 years this is going to be commonplace if uh you know as the system crumbles I don't know what the system crumbles means but I I like that idea and I kind of see it with like um I think you finally see it with like mental health and like improving your own mental health like the the stigma is that's like the catchphrase around mental health and like mental health training and going to a therapist is like i feel like that's slowly being released and it's like you know it's

okay to have crossfit for your brain and your soul and your yoni people not crossfit for it but like training for it well i would i always like to refer to it as like you know the triangle of the the delta of the mind body is it mind body's soul mind body spirit right in the center of that is really the core of it is your sexuality like we all came from an orgasm hopefully hopefully too, you know? And I'm a love baby. I'm a love baby. Yeah, I can tell. Why are you so anal retentive? I said, I said, mom, why did you have me? She's like, me and your dad wanted to have a love baby. It's like, I feel it. I feel it. Emily, when people hang out with me, it probably is like so fucking annoying because like we'll be like I'll look over and I'll be like, geez, look at that. Look at that lady who's 400 pounds drinking like seven fucking cokes or look at that guy over there wearing like six masks. Oh, my God.

While holding three snicker bars and I'm like a fucking broken record. It's like my family probably just no one wants to hang out with me because of that. With you, is it just like, oh, just no one wants to hang out with me because of that with you is it just like oh my god i feel your pussy energy oh my god i need like is every like is like thanks get thanksgiving dinner with your family just crazy honestly um because i think you actually like enough of the pussy oh god i know i could talk about it so much because enough of the pussy. Oh God. I know I could talk about it so much because enough of the virus. But once you start living from pussy, life is like totally different. But also I know how to dial it back. And most people don't want to talk about the,

like their sexuality or they shut down immediately. And those are like, usually the people that need it the most. But like you said it, and you said it on our podcast, is that sometimes when you roll with something and you get really deep into it, you lose people. And I don't want to do that

because I think everybody deserves, I want to meet them wherever they're at, whatever level they are at with their yonis or with their sexuality, with their fitness, you know? And really ultimately it's like judgment takes a lot of energy. It's, you know, it's you know, so I'm the same way I could judge. I could harp on so many people and get so angry,

but that's when I know i need to dive into my pussy and probably just get into a pleasure state god i wish i had a pussy i know right you do you could you definitely could hobart can we do three stories without this is don't don't don't blame this on me all right let's roll. Got one about mental health by the rapper Logic. Before rapper Logic recorded his 2017 album, Everybody, which would eventually go platinum, he traveled in a bus from Los Angeles to New York City, stopping at his fans' homes and sharing meals with them.

Wow. He was shocked at how he kept hearing from his fans that they said his music changed their life. He recalled in this 2017 interview, in his mind, he said, I was never trying to save anybody's life. However, he considered, what if I actually did try and save people's lives? Song 1-800-273-8255, a reference to the phone number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, corresponded with an increase in calls to the hotline during periods of heightened online attention on that song, as well as a reduction in suicide, an estimated 245, potentially, this study found. The song that Logic wrote, potential impact, according to the study, may represent the Papagino effect in which the mass media presents alternatives to suicide and plays a role in preventing it.

More often, as we were just talking about, the media does the opposite, fixating on the suicides of celebrities causing further suicides, a phenomenon known as the Werther effect. The study's lead author writes the risk of suicide increased 13% following celebrity suicide. This was found in a 2020 study. Anyway, logic song in the music video brings in the narrative into sharper focus is, is it depicts a high school student struggles with his sexuality and leads him to consider suicide, but in the end he is dissuaded by a call to the hotline. So that was a cool article.

What's the Eminem song like that? Is it Stan? Stan. It's a great song. The Werther effect is the mimicry of suicide after highly publicized suicide. You know what's amazing about that? Here we go. Ready, Emily?

Watch me tie this up hobart and uh suze already know where this is going let's just assume the the werther effect is the mimicry of wearing masks after highly publicized mask wearing listen you fucking knuckleheads those of you who don't think mask wearing is contagious or spreads fear or that it's not the fear flag or that all that shit shit, that is what you're doing. And that's why you're complicit. This is someone killing themselves that leads to other people killing themselves. If this is real, if there is actually some truth behind this and it's hard to kill yourself. It's not like everyone, maybe everyone's thought of like doing it, but like, yeah, maybe I won't do it today. It's hard. It's like there's some serious consequences and follow through. Wearing a mask is easy.

It's so easy. It's called the masker effect. Sivan, you wanted me to do three news stories. Sorry, sorry. It's just crazy that people like, I bet you these knuckleheads from the open access government where I looked up were their effect. They believe this is real. And yet they still promote all the fear around the virus they promote all the fear around fingering your own anus stop don't fear the anus just put on some music and just chill change it up tonight don't

go don't be afraid to go outside with just half a mask on. Pull it down below your nose. Set yourself free. Fucking cowards. Baby steps. Thank you. Baby steps. I'm trying to include that. Yeah, baby steps. Trim your nails before you get – no one wants to be scratched or get poop under them. The Biden administration's Build Back Better Act is a sweeping social spending and climate package, which is considered a key pillar of Mr. Biden's agenda.

I like that the BBC referred to him as Mr. Biden, not President Biden. What a slight. It would increase funding for government health insurance programs, expand tax credits for low income families, provide government funded universal preschool and invest hundreds of billions of dollars in addressing climate change. It would be mostly paid for by raising taxes on the wealthy and corporations. It did pass the House of Representatives last month following a vote that largely fell on party lines but was expected to face significant hurdles in the Senate. I believe the bill is going to cost somewhere around $1.9 trillion. Democratic West Virginia Senator Joe Manchin said he had worked as diligently as possible to determine the best path forward despite serious reservations

and currently stands as a significant hurdle to Democrats passing this bill because they will need all 50 senators votes um to get it passed uh raise taxes on who you yeah that's what i thought um just so you know ladies and gentlemen raising taxes on corporations only punishes one person jeff bezos only punishes poor people rich people we don't give a fuck you're only punishing corporate you're when you raised and when you raise taxes on rich people you're only punishing one person poor people don't fall for that shit you choose where you want to spend your money you want to spend your money i um spend your money with emily taking a yoni class spend your money with hobart taking a um uh whatever he did in your stroke vinegar stroke class spend your money with suza over at

uh um over at crossfit livermore give me uh give me some money on my youtube station if you don't then you pay money to taxes what you're doing is you're giving the king and queen taxes who are the king and queen the homecoming queen the people we've elected in the office and you're saying that they know how to spend it better than we know how to spend it they don't it's not a democrat or a republican thing stop support these those people are on welfare you you want to make fun of the kardashians because they've done nothing to earn money at least they made you a tv show you can watch these people in office. They just,

they're, they're just running so that they can make money. I would watch keeping up with the Bidens. Yeah, that would be awesome. The first hour would just be Joe Biden getting out of bed to try and brush his teeth. It'd be a great show.

And, and, and Emily would be on there. I'm teaching Jill about her yoni oh i don't know i i find jill attractive i like to think of her um getting yoni training oh i hear an echo is that me is that you're not recording you're not recording our conversation are you hobart like might be i thought i turned my phone off but um a typhoon is a mature tropical cyclone that develops between 180 degrees and 100 degrees east

in the northern hemisphere this region is referred to as the northwestern pacific basin and is the most active tropical cyclone basin on earth accounting for almost one-third of the world's on Earth, accounting for almost one-third of the world's annual tropical cyclones. Currently, this death toll from a cyclone typhoon Rai in the Philippines has climbed to at least 75 people, local officials reported. Search and rescue operations continued over the weekend after this typhoon, the 15thphoon to hit the philippines i'm not laughing at people's suffering just typhoons sound terrifying and 15 of them hitting the philippines sounds awful made landfall thursday on sarago sarago island a popular tourist and surfing destination on the central east coast also probably where a lot of people just live their daily lives the estimated cost of damage is 4.2 million dollars according

to a state news agency around 332 000 people have been evacuated from their homes by disaster risk reduction and management council. A question. So a couple, a couple of things. What's the difference between a typhoon typhoon and a cyclone? A cyclone is a really powerful typhoon. I think a typhoon is a confluence of weather events and a cyclone occurs, can occur during a typhoon. I don't think you need a typhoon to have a cyclone.

I think they can occur on their own, but I think it has to do with the certain size and where it's located in the... Okay, Sousa, will you pull up a definition for me? Hobart only confused me more. Emily, on a one to 10, how would you rate Hobart's definition of cyclone and typhoon?

I fell in love with the fact that he used the word confluence. Oh, great. Emily's not going to be invited back if she keeps being so nice to you. And you talked about which hemispheres it's in. I don't know any of that hemisphere stuff. Can you tell me which countries it is? It's in the Philippines, man. I know.

And where is that? Where's the Philippines? It's in the Philippines, man. I said that. I know. And where is that? Where is the Philippines? That's like by Jamaica? No. No. Hawaii? Yeah. Go to Hawaii and then go southwest a lot.

Do we own the Philippines? No, no, no. We own Puerto Rico, right? United States owns Puerto Rico. Philippines is its own country. Oh, shut up. Don't even fucking say a thing in the comments. I'll come in there and bust your ass.

Okay, so basically we don't have cyclones or typhoons over here. You're saying it's only Asian people. It's race specific. Yes. Not interesting. I think we could, I think we can have cyclones because you have something like we talked about a bomb cyclone,

which is when you have, I think two opposing weather patterns and they either, they drop in altitude. I think at a certain speed, which creates a cyclone, which can push a lot of like cold, different types of air, extreme cold air.

We had one recently in the u.s and push like a cold front across the u.s but i don't think we have typhoons we have tornadoes what's that thing we have tornadoes and we have hurricanes what's that thing like in the cartoons and it's like just water spinning in a circle and like whirling dervish are those real i don't know what you're talking about you know what i'm talking about talking about? I think of that as a typhoon. Like it's the waters spinning in a circle. You've never seen that? Like in a bathtub, but it's happening in the ocean.

I've only seen it in cartoons. Those aren't real. It's like a whirlpool. And finally, to help this story, $4.2 million. You know that the damage done at Ferguson during the BLM riotsm riots was 700 million dollars 4.2 million dollars couldn't sleep in my backyard for that much okay oh yeah that thing right there yeah we're talking about i said that oh i thought you said whirling dervish well maybe you're that just happens naturally maybe your property's just overpriced. It's true. Okay.

Are whirlpools real? Yeah. Does that happen in the ocean or in like fresh water? Or just in my bathtub? I think a whirlpool can occur in lots of places. If you circle the opening of your anus counterclockwise. Yeah. I say because that's an actual technique you will you will not only call the whirlpool but if you listen carefully it'll make the sound of a music bowl it will after you spent some time and attention with your beautiful anus. The whirlpool.

Oh, wow. The whirlpool basically is nature's anus. The whirlpool is a body of rotating water produced by opposing currents or a current running into an obstacle. Whirlpools from when a bath or a sink is draining. Wait. Yeah. More powerful ones in seas or oceans may be termed maelstroms they pronounce that right yeah that's what you're thinking about a maelstrom that's bad news

that is huh yeah i mean that would be scary vortex is a proper term for a whirlpool that has a downdraft remember the final pirates of the caribbean where he's fighting um davy jones and the ships are battling out the flying dutchman in the black pearl i couldn't handle those movies they're going around the edge oh they're great they're going around the edge of the um i could see you date oh this probably isn't good for your luddite but i could see you dating johnny depp emily what yeah i could see you guys actually i think i remember crying as a little girl and this i don't know what this means probably gonna have to unpack this later you just brought it up but i was

i can remember looking at johnny depp on like the movie chocolat and like crying because i was like i'll never i'll never be able to be with him i remember crying about that as a little girl when i when i saw him in uh sherlock no jack the ripper i also cried and thought oh and can never be with him different movie but same same experience um i'm looking at like the world's largest whirlpools and there's one in british columbia called the skookum chuck narrows isn Isn't that a great word? Skookumchuck? And it just stays open all the time? It's just always whirling. And there's another huge one in Japan.

And then one in Scotland. It's pretty cool. Wow. Seems dangerous. It's constantly whirling. Yeah. Suze's fiancee opens a computer tomorrow morning. What the fuck are these tabs open for? Oh, yes.

Gilbert Gray. Maybe I'll watch that tonight to get ready for Dave Lipson tomorrow morning. What's eating Gilbert Gray? Damn, Heidi. I also cried because Brian and I will never be. Hey, Hey, why will they never,

why will you never be with Brian? Yeah. I'll send you, I'll send you his address. Never say never Heidi. Never say never. I mean, he was Brian,

Brian friend. He's the guy who's periodically on this show, but some, but people just, just aren are just in love with him i can't have him on too much because he just takes all the attention away from me oh wow yeah yeah now i'm gonna google him yeah make google him he's got a good he's got a good energy he's got a great beard going on right now great beard anti-coup protests in sudan people across the united joined mass protests over

the military's takeover as they marked the third anniversary of a popular uprising hundreds of thousands marched in the capital of khartoum where security forces responded with tear gas demonstrations in 2019 led to the overthrow of sudan long-term authoritarian, I should just say long-term president, because I don't really know too much, Omar al-Bashir. Civilian and military leaders then entered into an uneasy power-sharing agreement until the coup in October. Last month, the country's ousted prime minister,

Abdallah Hamdok, was reinstated after being put under house arrest in the military takeover. The move has failed to stop protests in the country where demonstrators have been calling for an entirely civilian political leadership. We're now currently it's a military leadership. On Sunday, protesters marched toward the presidential palace in Khartoum, which is the home to coup leader General Abdel Fattah al-Burhan, chanting, the people are stronger and retreat is impossible. At least 45 people have been killed in the crackdowns on protesters since the October takeover, according to the Independent Doctors Committee. Under the Fractious Power Sharing agreement reached in 2019, the general, the coup

leader general, General Burhan, had been due to step down as head of state, handing over power to the civilian committee last month. This didn't happen. He has defended the coup saying that the army acted to prevent a civil war that was threatening to erupt because political groups had been inciting civilians against the security forces he says the general says that sudan will is still committed to the transition to civilian rule with elections planned for 2023 under the well and then this was interesting too so with all the takeaway to this story what's the sudan's not a place you want to live there in political upheaval yeah and the internet has been restricted so i don't think anytime a government or political regime restricts internet good things are happening no i agree i agree um yeah honestly we are so lucky we are so blessed to be living in north america correct yes yes

sorry we just forget that fact a lot all right that was three news stories savann that's pretty good i can go a fourth uh yes i'm texting okay students arrested for pranks arrests on thursday and friday of male students in connecticut california florida illinois maryland ohio rhode island south carolina texas California, Florida, Illinois, Maryland, Ohio, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Texas, and Wisconsin came after schools increased security in response to the rumors, which spread like wildfire after the November 30th school shooting in Oxford Township. I believe that there was this online challenge where these students would make threats about going into schools and harming other students shoot causing school shootings or like bringing a bomb into school more than half a dozen school districts in houston area told middle and high school students to leave their backpacks at home on friday in response to these

tiktok posts of of these fake threats though none of the districts had received credible threats, said officials, the boys arrested range from the ages of 13 to 16, according to local media reports. So you can't threaten schools like they're bomb threats. Like there was something like, what is this? They were doing posts. Like there's like a,

like a tick tock challenge, like to do these posts, like threaten violence inside of your school. And then did the people do them anonymously or they did them? They didn't want to take on tick tock. Yeah. Are people nuts? Do kids not know how to be sneaky anymore? I know they do.

I think we're cause there's, well, you're part of the boomers seven then there's easy easy i easy i'm not part easy he's part of the greatest generation right you can call me we're the doomers and then the kids below us are the zoomers and they actually are really they get technology way more than all of us. We're a bunch of like idiots. But here's my question. Do you think kids these days have the ability to be mischievous? Because that's like a really important part of like, you know, going through your rebellious teenager stage is being mischievous.

Mischievous now is just to be a white dude. Like Hobart. Hobart would just be mischievous and i don't think now is just just to be a a white dude like hobart hobart hobart would just be mischievous just a white yeah he just oh look at him you're not he's not allowed in safe spaces everything's a safe space that's a great question no there's a camera fucking everywhere there's no throwing eggs at your neighbor's house anymore they'll catch you on a ring camera. There's no setting fire to an old hoopty in the woods anymore. Yeah. Oh, you did that.

Yes, you definitely did. No statute of limitations. But I think one of the things behind the popularity of like these challenges is that it gets people attention on these platforms. Hey, you're crazy. If you're threatening to hurt someone on one of these platforms and then it gets you and then it gets you more likes and and you know bring some level of virality to your your tiktok page oh my god i gotta follow this guy threatened to blow up a school can i see your dog is your dog old

or is it shaking does it have parkinson's oh no i was just like shaking it oh this is captain have you had him for a long time it's a girl yeah i found her under a dumpster in mexico actually wow 12 years ago that's cool yeah she's been my buddy ever since well good thing she didn't live in india because reports from india said that a group of monkeys is going on a deadly revenge mission against one village's dogs sorry it all started in the b district after several dogs reportedly killed a baby monkey now within the last month the village of lavul which has a population of 5,000 people, I believe, says nearly all of its dogs, around 250, have been killed by this group of monkeys. Holy shit.

I'm kind of okay with that. I'm kind of okay with that. Listen to this. God, it's good. I hate monkeys. The monkeys are apparently catching dogs, taking them to the tops of trees and tall buildings and throwing them off. Wow.

The monkeys, listeners, are also now creating a panic as they target small children. But local officials told everyone to wear masks and everything's fine. There you go, Siobhan. That was for you. According to Scientific American, monkeys are known to take revenge on associates or family members of their aggressors. is unique, so your business insurance should be too. Whether you're a shop owner, a pet groomer, a contractor, or a consultant, you can get customized coverage for

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this ashram up near the... Most people go to an ashram, but Emily went to an ashram. Totally different. An ashram? An ashram. And I was walking through the you know it's like the old beatles uh ashram and oh sorry ashram and um i turn around and there's a huge male monkey looking at me probably like

you know 10 feet away and he's got this like a big pink penis. And it's like, his owner was holding somebody else's. Okay. And it was like semi erect. And he was bearing his teeth at me. And I went into like, complete, like, primal girl, like, I don't know what happened but I had this huge water bottle it's just like started screaming and like threw it at the monkey and then ran down the other trail but he wanted I don't know what he wanted to do to me yes you do monkeys in India are insane like they're no joke yeah I had some friends who lived there and they said you have to like you have to like fight off the monkeys and they're they'll steal shit and they're violent

and um yeah do you guys know santa monica boulevard the the santa monica like walk way whatever in uh los angeles you know like those it's like a street with shops but instead of cars they have it closed off and people can walk on them they got that shit all over india right just everywhere just people everywhere so i was in one of those one time and i was actually with spieler and we were it was up in northern india and we're walking it's just crowded everywhere tens of thousands of people everywhere and in hanging out in the sections would be like monkeys like hanging out like kids like just like 10 monkeys hanging out and as we go by the monkeys the first time the our host goes hey don't make eye contact with the monkeys and i made eye contact with the monkeys and they fucking they came over like

they came over like what like surround you surround our group and they're like only like three feet tall because they're like this and then they stand up like this and they're like six feet tall. You know what I mean? You're like, holy shit. And they're scary. You're right. They are really, really, really scary. Yeah, like that.

Like those guys. Yeah, everywhere. Just hanging out. Yeah, like on the road. Yeah, everywhere. It's pretty cool. When I was in Varanasi and they sit one night at a hotel and they said, hey, make sure you keep your windows locked. And actually every night I was there, I would hear the monkeys checking my windows to come in.

You got to go to Varanasi? I've been everywhere. I've been everywhere except Hobart's house. And that might be the last place you ever see. I was waiting for a mother joke to be followed up on that by you no i respect your mom too much we're talking about i um i uh yeah i spent a lot of time in india uh working with a company called vitamin angels taking uh vitamins to malnourished children wow yeah it's pretty cool i recommend everyone go to india and stay there for a long time a couple months it's life-changing and you should go to china and spend some time there and

you should go to somewhere in africa like and i don't mean south africa i mean like sudan sudan that'd be a good place to go uganda malawi mozambique kenya just hang see the experiment of life in a different in a different way as emily would say that piggybacks on you should be very thankful you don't live there but but it is really cool to check it out and see you'll be fucking have your mind blown a whole another planet almost it feels like you're on a whole another planet i should plug this movie again there's a movie called Boys of Baraka. Boys of Baraka. You guys seen that movie?

I got to add that to my little, I added a lot of stuff to my little research list. Boys of Baraka. Yoni eggs, deep pleasure center, male prostate self-massage. Yes. Boys of Baraka. Can't wait till Cassandra sees this on the computer.

Yeah. You got to see this movie. This is an incredible movie. It's about kids that leave, uh, get out of Baltimore and go to Africa and live in Africa. It's nuts. And it really just shows you there.

There's so many levels there in this movie. So many lessons for life there it's so good so good wow an experimental boarding school in kenya yeah it's so good i mean it's incredible yes they steal items and sell them to local vent yet i don't know if they do that the monkeys but the monkeys are do all sorts of crazy shit. I got so many monkey stories, it's crazy. Same with monkeys in Kenya. Crazy monkey stories in Africa.

Yeah, see that movie. Everyone see that movie. That's a great movie, Boys of Baraka. Don't DM me and ask me what movie I was talking about. Just go see it. Okay, Hobart. I was outside all day yesterday, Chris. You need to chill out, man.

Who's the liver king? He's some guy on Instagram who eats a lot of raw organ meat. Are you going to show us who he is? Yeah, pull it up, Susan. Go to his Instagram. He's so yummy. Oh, is he ripped?

Nah. Yes. But he's not even real. You can't even get your head wrapped around him. Who's that boy he's with? I've never seen anyone else on his Instagram. Oh, yeah. The ancestral guy.

Oh, are those his kids and his wife? Yeah. He's done some stuff with workouts with them. They do tribe workouts or something. What a beautiful family. I love that he calls them tribe workouts. It's just a group workout, man. No, because they're simulated.

Hobart's very different than a normal workout. It's a simulated. Hobart, some people don't like the word twat, and some people like the word Poussey. If he wants to call it a group, a tribe and not a group, be cool.

It's different. Oh, wow. Look at all those chains. It's endless content. Wow. You guys, I'm telling you like two months ago when he showed up on the scene, he had You guys, I'm telling you, like two months ago

when he showed up on the scene, he had like 5,000 followers. Now he has 800,000. Wow. I think his wife is a holistic dentist, actually. How do you know that? I don't know. I don't know how I know that. Why do I know that?

But she is. What, what, what is going on right here? How do you know that? Why are you saying that? You just know you've heard of her? Yeah. I think I like read up on like ancestral, like, look at this guy. Where do they live? He's so red. It is unequivocally the most mentally physically spiritually challenging

feats the liver korean tribe have the honor to struggle through an even greater struggle when it starts to rain and grip is all but gone you think our ancestors would have sacrificed fallen comrade to splash of water or puddle of mud hell no neither does a liver king but someone is following you around with a camera. That probably didn't happen to our ancestors. Liver king. I'm friends with them. I'm honored to say I'm friends with them.

And not just on Instagram. Do you think our ancestors used sheets? But he won't come on my podcast for some reason. Of course they use sheets. How else would they know if they were sleeping with virgins? Oh, fuck. Gosh.

Oh, my God. Is nothing sacred? No. Whoa, he throws spears? I really would like to see him shaved that's pretty cool that he threw that spear though i'm pretty impressed by that that's super impressive it took 64 takes i asked him i made that up look at this guy i have a question mr liver king sir oh damn it wow question mr liver king sir oh damn it wow oh barton the liver king should do a wife swap for a week awesome youtube show i'm down

uh cassandra i'm gonna feed you to this this well just take one for the team sweetheart is it Cassandra or Cassandra you know it's funny when I first met her she said this when we first I was trying to like you know work my way in

is it twat or twat I asked her that and she was like she's like I don't really care and I was so confused so I refer to as cassandra cassandra beautiful name oh wait is this a tribe workout yes a tribe workout this is the barbarian the whole family does every member of the johnson tribe live and train according to the nine ancestral tenants what are those he's writing them now they're almost i think they're done or they're almost done hey um do you ever go like to an airport or something they have like a lamborghini in there and it's like all roped it's all roped

off no no hold on do you think he shaves the rest of his body just not his beard i don't know but how do you keep your hands off of him if i saw him i would need to him. It would be like those cars at the airport you're not supposed to touch. It's like I have to go over and just like – I want to – his stomach and his titties and just everything is crazy. He looks great. How limber is he though? That's my question. There's a video over there with his dick in his mouth.

You just got to scroll down a little further on his instagram i thought you were gonna say like his foot behind his head or something oh my goodness my metric for flexibility he can push his cray master with his nose he can push his button with his nose. That would be really impressive. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Yes, it's true. Move over barbell jobs.

We're going to Antarctica. Okay, let's do it. Oh yeah. Yeah, it's cool. I'll actually, it's only an Australian thing,

but I really want to go sign up. Can you believe the show has a sponsor, Emily? We had two sponsorship meetings today. Oh, Jaren, I got to ask her for some of those because I know she saved a bunch of them on her phone. What's your sponsor of this show? That's it, barbelljobs.com. Barbelljobs.com.

And what does that do? it's my fallback for when crossfit cans me it's basically jobs in the fitness space so there's a ton of gyms like if you need and a friend of mine just got a job they're using it by the way it's a virtual job but basically what you do is is yeah look there's 893 job posts on it um how can there be 893 job postings but only 106 currently open i don't understand but basically you you you punch in you know the shit you're looking for how much you want to make how often you want to make what country whether you clean bathrooms or not what's the top end for the salary i want to see if there's any jobs peg that thing that's below the poverty line in my town oh here we go i'm just telling you just hey and it's way below the poverty line emily tells the government not to tax rich people

it's below the poverty line in emily's town too It says that since he buys Starbucks eight times a day, Siobhan is the reason the economy is stimulated and people have jobs. It's the reason why your, your, your Cray masters stimulated because of me. Emily holds the record for the most times getting up of a guest in a show and eating a full dinner on the show. And my dog was going in and out you know and wearing a badass robe uh yeah this is my blanket robe i actually wear this in public a lot so looks really

comfortable it's the coziest everyone deserves something like this yeah i would really like it if on the back it said abbott. No way. Yes, yes. Wouldn't that be hard, Obar? No, the Empress or like the Yoni Queen or something. Yoni Queen would be good. Abbott, the Yoni Queen. Holy shit. That's what you call those products.

That's the brand. Yeah. Oh, my goodness. Okay, so who's the second sponsor? I can't tell you that we i can't tell you that i can do that but but we have we what who yoni queen industries yes the yoni yoni yoni queen is our uh we just had we just had two meetings today just and all of a sudden people are coming out of the woodwork wanting to sponsor the show the show is actually killing it did i know i tell

you this all the time hobart how good it's doing but we had 208 000 or something downloads last week just on itunes cool man you can pay me in um ether or bitcoin i'm just i'm sorry the show's doing horrible um you don't make any money being on itunes by the way but it's still fun jemma woldendorf managed to start work at moss and research station down in antarctica in march the former climbing and outdoor guide works as a field training officer responsible for search and rescue and training others to travel and work in the harsh environment there are duties such as proving sea ice routes assessing hazards in the field updating routes on the plateau maintaining

field equipment for the expeditioner use and in the field huts all part of the australian antarctic program looking for 200 others like her to fill 24 roles across i almost said holes oh man across antarctic research stations at Mawson, Davis and Casey, as well as on the Macquarie Island. The stations need plumbers, electricians, chefs, and engineering supervisors, among a range of other jobs. Miss Riley said that AAD is looking for people who are versatile, proactive, community-minded, and flexible, and is particularly encouraging women to apply. Contracts usually run between four and 15 months, and expeditioners are paid an allowance to compensate for living in a remote, isolated environment. Some of the jobs provide a $60,000 bonus on top of their base pay wage. So I wish

this was a program here. Pretty cool. If you want a job in Antarctica and you live in Australia, sign up. Um, I would be, I would like to know why they're looking for women specifically. Probably because they don't get a lot of women applicants. Oh, I think you're reading into that. And it's just a vinegar stroke sausage fest down on the casey and the what else davis and mawson research stations you're projecting hobart you think i am yes really i mean so why do you think they're asking for more women applicants i'm have no idea hazard a guess i i i Because they're sexist. Nope.

Yep. Okay. And I'm projecting. I mean, why would you ask someone to apply by whether they have a vagina or a penis for a job? What are the reasons? Well, because if I was having someone apply to stimulate my creatinine, I would not. What was it? The cremator pump?

The bulbous cremator pump? Creatinine? Hey, did you see the new? Did anyone watch the new Dune? Yeah, I did. How is it? It's okay. Okay.

I don't watch it. I think they do too much storytelling in that first. It's beautiful, but they try to fit too much of that story into that first movie. And it feels really rushed, which is kind of a bummer because it's doomed. Listen, we got to go back to Antarctica. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, let's go back to that. Here's why they want women.

Okay. Let's go back to that. Here's why they want women. Because the Antarctic is a, an access point to the hollow earth as well as underground bases and pyramids believed to be extraterrestrial in origin that the world governments are keeping a secret. And they want women to go into the hollow earth, which is actually this it's touted to be this like absolute utopia

of higher level beings maybe another density of consciousness and they want the women to go in there and probably experience the intense pleasure that is of living in a utopia and then come back and raise this level of consciousness on regular earth what do you guys think i think that's a great movie script i think it's been done already hey is that why it didn't superman's like crystal castle land in antarctica that's right antarctica or hollow earth is where godzilla lives how did you come up with that so quick, Emily? You've heard of Hollow Earth? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm deep into conspiracy theories.

Yeah. All right, make a note of that, Matt. There's supposed to be pyramids. Rumors of pyramids are said to have been found throughout Antarctica since the 1800s. Mass graves of eight-foot-long skeletons and elongated skulls have also been found. In 1939, the Nazis found ancient ruins in underground caverns accessible only by submarine. How did you find that?

Okay, this is even better. In 2016, religious, political, and scientific groups have visited various ancient sites all within about the same time frame. It was suggested that Pizzagate helped distract the attention that was given to the oddly recent visits to Antarctica. Google Maps is covering up any anomalies that are claimed to be in Antarctica. My goodness. My goodness. claim to be in antarctica my goodness my goodness and look up some uh general or not uh the bird byrd oh my god guys i'm how does she how does she i was gonna do a conspiracy theory of the week but now we don't have to this is awesome okay check out admirable admiral richard bird i started Check out Admiral Richard Bird. I started reading about him this week.

Trippy. This guy was actually forbidden to speak about what he saw. He saw the hollow earth beings. And he wrote about it. But I thought he was forbidden. Well, sorry. He was only able to say like a little bit. But he spoke about how he was actually silenced at the pentagon because he was you know property of the u.s oh geez wow

i am ordered to remain silent in regard to all that i have learned on the behalf of humanity what do you think you learned oh man about the hollow earth. I have a picture here. It's so cool. It's called Agartha, the land of advanced races. City of Shambhala. Yeah.

Oh, Shambhala. Not. Oh, Shambhala. The Chintamani stone. Oh, I don't know about that. Isn't that where it was? That in Shambhala? I don't know about that. Isn't that where it was? That in Shambhala? I don't know.

But you guys should check out Agartha, Antarctica's Secrets, and Admiral Byrd's Flight of 1947. Really trippy. Majestic 12 was originally conceived by a man named Jesse Marcel who had been involved with the first Roswell UFO. Oh, okay, it's UFO stuff. That'd be so cool if Godzilla existed. Operation Hydro.

The greatest. What other conspiracy theories are you into, Emily? Oh, well, I don't know if we have time on this show to go down uh one pertinent and very alive uh crumbling house of cards narrative yes yeah savannah is that what i don't know do we really want to go down there? That's just one of them. I mean, my next story, I have another conspiracy theory. OK, we are in you know how like in the Bible they say like there's nothing new under the sun. Well, there's actually this Alouette elder tribal leader. And he says that the reason there's nothing new under the sun,

that the reason there's nothing new under the sun, that history just keeps repeating itself over the past 5,000 years, is because women have forgotten the sacred vibration of their womb, aka the pleasure center. And as women, we are, in 2012, the Mayan calendars said that there would be a huge, you remember it said people are like,

oh, the Mayan calendar stops. People thought like life was going to end. But actually what was happening is there's this huge, they knew there'd be this huge rise in feminine consciousness. And so now we're going into this crazy epoch of integration, which is why the earth's magnetosphere has diminished, earth, mother, and there's too much electricity electricity in all of our bodies we're all like short-circuiting right now which is why we're seeing so much fear but as feminine consciousness rises and that is women are coming back to their bodies understanding that they actually have the power to control them have the power to uh feel a state of pleasure all the time

and to really course life force energy through them, thus also healing the masculine energy, the masculine fractured archetype, because men are beautiful and we just kind of have lost father in our society. So we're starting to come back into a time of integration. And what's going to happen is that because women are remembering the sacred vibration of their womb, we are actually going to be able to birth something new into the world. And this is going to blow everybody's mind. And we're all going to be hanging out with hollow earth advanced races and just getting into all kinds of wild things. races and just getting into all kinds of wild things so that's my other conspiracy theory i i am one of those beans no you're not man

oh hobart i can dream yeah you're you're too supercharged man You're so out of the magnetosphere with that statement. I want to be so advanced and be hanging with you, Luddites. I didn't use the word right, did I? We're not going to be in the metaverse. We're going to be in the magneto-electrosphere. I don't think I'll ever go into the metaverse. It's irresistible.

It's irresistible. You love DMs. I think you will be very into the metaverse. I love DMs. I love DMs. Yesterday, I caught up on all my DMs. It was crazy. You get a lot of DMs.

That's a huge hit of dopamine. Oh, DMs. It was crazy. You get a lot of DMs. That's a huge hit of dopamine. Oh, DMs. What are you doing in there, Sevan? Nothing. Just some DMs. Just responding to Colin Lawrence. He sent me 25 memes. Oh my god. He likes more than me. He usually only sends them to me in packets of eight wow that's awesome that you got 25 over packets of eight hobart do you and your do you always sleep on the same side of the bed every night um we at we'll we mostly yes but we switch it once in a while we switch sides of the bed yeah why what's the point

of switching i don't know why not adventurous yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna try it the thing is my wife will be so cool if i say that to her hey i want to switch sides but but the only reason why i would say it is just to get like like to agitate her but i don't think it would work you're potster yeah potster potster i think hobart the reason why hobart and his wife can um switch sides of beds is because they both on either side of the bed there is like a hair plucking kit they both have you know they have a mirror and a tweezers on both sides of the bed and so you know they they can be on either side they get into this like no just hobart just everything hobart's a hair plucker i think are you a hair plucker hobart do you have tweezers i mean we

have tweezers in the house no but for you you know how like girls like pull their hairs out of like their mustache and shit like do you do that no man okay that got weird will's it got weird it got weird will's it got weird it got weird the yoni queen abbott has suggested that the show what if the aliens made the vaccine um i would say that there's some reptilian well that's another conspiracy theory. There's reptilian overlords. Beneath the Denver airport. Yeah, that's like a conspiracy theory. The Denver files.

Oh, my goodness. No way. But I got a question, though. If there's beings living inside a hollow earth, why don't they ever come out and say hi? Why would they hide themselves? Emily is one of those beings what are you talking about here she is delivering the yoni information i feel the energy i seriously actually in mexico just met someone though who's probably a hollow earth being how'd you know

what gave it away um their ability to eat three ounces of mushrooms and still kind of abnormal uh just like the the information that was being presented was just um not of this earth it's just strange it wasn't and he wasn't he didn't even see men or woman or anything, you know, it's just like. A being. Gender fluid. Yeah, a being, right? Like, it was weird. Kind of like this new show.

I don't know if you guys have ever come across it. I've never come across that. Yes, I'll, next week, if you come on the show again, if we didn't scare you off, if you're going to, yes, I'll show you. Yes, those beings do exist yeah strange those beings do exist unfortunately now there's you know it's crazy and i mean this in all seriousness if you eat like shit you can become one of those beings too but a bad one you know what i mean like you can fuck your hormones you've seen those people where they've got and especially dudes but dudes who just get so fucking hormonally out of whack that they don't – they're not dudes anymore.

And by the way, if you do that to a kid, his testicles won't drop. There's tons and tons of – that's going on now. You'll ruin a young boy's fucking whole life by feeding him too much fucking sugar before the age of five. His balls – his cock and balls will never develop. But the beans – I know what you're talking about i'm not sorry thanks a lot mom yes and actually also with phthalates and any kind of endocrine disruptor like even the milk um it's pumped out of those tubes that it just threw out all my deodorant yeah seven wasn't i talking to you about it like they actually measure i'm sorry i'm sorry what was my name i'm sorry seven yeah i like seven i know you do hobart

yeah yeah you can call me whatever you want will will you make a graphic that says the m the abbott podcast or the yoni queen podcast for um for the next show and we'll put it up there in the corner perfect i know i like an emery board you have an emery board the young that's fun i love those as a little boy my mom's emeryory boards. Okay, sorry. So what were you going to say about phallic? Oh, the urogenital length discrepancy. And that when you don't want to put your fingers that close together on this show. Really close.

Why does that make you uncomfortable? So seven. I tell my kids sometimes I only love you this much damn you have to perform and do amazing things to receive my love then they'll find out that love's infinite and it doesn't matter if it's this much or that's beautiful thank you okay so tell sorry you were talking about penises shrinking or something that's our next story is average penis size too this is great oh that's um honestly there's a That's beautiful. Thank you. Okay, so sorry, you were talking about penises shrinking or something? That's our next story is average penis size too. This is great.

Oh, honestly, there's an incredible researcher who just spent the past 30 years discovering that fertility is going down 1% per year since the 70s. Fertility is diminishing in humans. I want her on my show. Who is that? That's good. That's how we're going to stop global warming. Oh, good God. Good God.

But yeah, it's really interesting. And they, she started measuring because we have so many endocrine disruptors in our world. And we just keep getting hit with it, hit with it, hit with it.

These babies, baby boys were being hit with it, hit with it, hit with it. These babies, baby boys were being born with these really short urogenital measurements. So I think between the anus and the, you know, the scrote, not the scrote, sorry, the chode. And so they started measuring that. And when you had a really small measurement, they followed those boys into their 20s. measurement they followed those boys into their 20s and they were more uh apt to have um testicular cancer soy boyism um whoa whoa whoa what's soy boyism that's when your skin looks like yours hobart hey you're talking about the distance between the ball stack and the anus um that that's the that that that you want acreage in there well no i mean you don't want

you want to be able to play a game of tic-tac-toe in there where you can see the x's and the o's big or that like little game you play with your friends where you flip the paper football between the uprights yes yes yes you want yeah or i think at least be able to palpate the bulbous spongiosum. Yeah, I got a good bulbous. Yeah. Yeah. That sucked. I heard an echo.

I started touching my bulbous thing, and one of you guys had your YouTube open, and I heard my voice echo. That's really interesting. Isn't it kind of interesting it kind of makes me wonder like even you know how many kids these days have gender dysphoria or is it dysmorphia sorry um it makes me wonder is this because it's a cultural like neo-marxist thing or is it because it's a endocrine disruptor from the 90s it's both it's that west murder thing that we talked about earlier about like like it's become the cool thing to do to kiss a boy your sophomore year and then it's also um fucked up hormones i think i think i think diet has played an enormous role in that, an enormous, enormous role. I think it's way, way understated.

Hmm. And I think it's confused people. And probably porn. And porn hasn't helped. The internet hasn't helped too. Oh, porn is brutal. Porn hasn't helped. I can't imagine seeing porn when you're seven.

Yeah, I would just sit in my parents' room in the corner at night. That's awesome, though, that they were so healthily expressing their love. I'm kidding. Okay, you can tell us more stories from the dark farm. We're here to hold space. I just wanted to see if I could crack and get Savan to crack,

but he didn't even bat an eye at that. You mean about watching porn in your room? I'm not a porn guy. I didn't say porn. Oh, what did you say? Something that you see my parents have sex. Oh,

sorry. I was reading comments about me. Uh, yeah. Hey, have you seen the movie speaking of parents having sex have you seen the movie surf surf wise no have you seen it emily Wow. Surf wives? Did Will just do that? Sousa? Wow. Oh shit, he's in here. Holy shit.

The Yoni Queen. Oh my gosh, did you just make that? Who made that? I didn't. Will did. Who's Will? Just one of the guys. I missed it, whatever it it was it's still there up around there it is the yoni queen i will i said yoni empress yeah asshole

queens are like no i still appreciate you thank you that's really sweet uh surf wise a guy he's a medical doctor. He's the head of the medical association in Hawaii. He's a big-time fucking super high-end doctor. And he just decides, fuck it. I'm not doing this anymore. And he moves to California, and he buys a van, and he says, I'm just going to surf up and down the coast of California, and that's all I'm going to do. Well, he ends up meeting this chick, and he ends up just banging her in the bus not the bang bus

the different before bang bus and he um and he ends up having 10 kids in this in this van yeah there it is and in in the movie that one of the kids are like yeah i was a fuck i was the first born so i was awake when the other nine were made you know yes oh my gosh yeah my man told me about this yeah it's a great movie it's fucking awesome don't tell the penis story i gotta i gotta uh drain my prostate one more i'm gonna um milk my prostate because that that was you should just sit there and clench no i can't anymore hold it as long as you can you had to pee twice but since we've been on the show yeah three times i drank three and a half cups of water and you haven't had to pee yet you since we've been on the show yeah three times i drank three and a half cups

of water and you haven't had to pee yet you guys are not just drinking plain ass water i'm drinking i had two cups of coffee because you need to add some uh add back in some minerals some like trace minerals or something like that look how good look how good all of our skins look. All four of us. Our skins. Our skins. Now imagine if we could sew them together in one giant... Oh, good God!

If the human tsunami is brought up anymore tonight, I will have to leave. Okay, that's enough. I won't bring it up again. You're making the guest uncomfortable. That's why I'm here. That's why I'm here. But I don't want to offend

the Yoni Empress, so I won't bring it up again. Are we going to the... He told me to wait on the... Actually, that's a good story. We're not going to get to the Texas laws story.

It's probably better we don't get there. We might. We never really went into the penis length discrepancy or something. But he wanted us to wait for that. That's what we're waiting on right now. Oh, okay. What else have we got here? Companies being great. He wanted us to wait for that. That's what we're waiting on right now. Oh, okay, okay. Yes.

What else do we got here? Company's being great. Jake Paul. Some good ones in here. So I didn't know about this Jake Paul phenomenon. Like, I don't really, I don't know. I just don't follow that kind of stuff. Yeah.

But he smashed him when he knocked him out. Yeah, he did. And then I read a whole article on how they think it was staged i don't know about stage pretty good stage yeah he wrecks him um anyway dr anthony yoon who famously ripped the medical community over breast implant myths last summer is back with another body part bombshell the i don't know why this is a surprise like come on dude's over exaggerating their penis size men's penis sizes are exaggerated in studies a video of his manhood myth busting currently boasts more than 400 430 000 views on tiktok which is all that really matters anymore but the real length is probably less than the dictated average because most men with small wieners probably wouldn't consent

to being involved in these studies i believe the average erect junk is around 5.15 inches one five inches do i have a ruler here yep why do you call it junk i mean that's your body part come on that's just what it says in the article my pleasure okay my mom i gotta remember that my mom washes this um no hobart don't remember that why don't i have a ruler what's fine what are i'm going to type in objects that are five inches isn't an iphone like five inch objects a dollar bill is like six inches right like the contextualized things contextualize oh here this is interesting one two three four five six pennies back to back like stacked on top of each other uh oh here we go here are nine things five inches long iphone 7 two adult thumbs five garden snails 6.5 pennies big pen soda can look at you look at the camera when you said soda can you're broken man

hold on hold on there's more to this okay good we dare you not to look at your hand after reading this men whose index fingers are shorter than their ring fingers tend to, I love this kind of stuff, tend to have bigger penises according to Korean research. Wait, which fingers? Which finger needs to be bigger? Men whose index fingers are shorter than their ring fingers. That's your pointer finger? Yeah, this one shorter than your ring finger.

Oh, yes. Let me see. Hold up. Pull them together. Let's see how small that thing is oh yeah your index finger is tiny man my hand i have tight i have pretty tiny hands you do okay everybody has to show everyone has to show i did this earlier but my left hand they're the same height but then on my right hand my index finger is much shorter just push it down

like this just push it down look at susan clenching his fist hey i don't even have an index finger my index is longer on either side oh yeah wow you have a tiny penis hey if you lean your fingers over this way you can um you see he's scratching your fingers back over there i have this friend who has an enormous penis and i'm going el caballo yeah el caballo and i mean enormous that means his index finger or his ring finger and he's in he flew to hawaii today and I'm going to call, so he's three hours behind us. This is his index finger.

I'm going to ask him to send me a picture of his hand now. It just looks like this. He's the nicest guy ever. He does not deserve a giant penis. I don't know. They also said that the angle between the index and the thumb is actually the true length

like from here to here yeah that's probably like five inches well I guess it's different for everybody yeah you're like he breaks off his own thumb take a knife and just cut this open right here oh but penis size doesn't matter it doesn't matter one of the theories is because that's

not true that's not true guys get exposed to while they're in fetuses controls both the length of the penis as well as the fingers say research watch out for phthalates there you go and and where can we find phthalates uh if you are any plastic and any um like even like the milk because phthalate is used to make plastic bendable oh yeah yeah it softens plastic so you're saying milk cartons plastic milk cartons yeah well even the tubes that are used to pump the milk out of the cow's udder oh shit i know right it goes so far back oh shit in the supply chain but you know the great yeah there you go i just get it straight from the utter i love it too it's so good straight utter milk find a farmer i didn't build probably

for like 15 years 20 years and then i had kids and they started drinking milk and now like when i go to the store if i can find raw milk and this one gas station i go to who's got it like gas station supermarket and it's nuts and that cream at the top and just scooping out the spoon and you don't even yeah i go find i have a plug for uh you don't like that stuff susa not the way you described it no yes emily oh i'm saying i have a plug for a fresh goat goat's milk from a real cool lady and uh it's the best and you get it from her in town uh no she's out in the country but it's pure pure like you taste it it is full of nutrients and it's just it's life it's

an elixir do you eat raw eggs yeah sometimes but i like them do you eat raw eggs james hold on isaiah dorn um send me a d DM about your earlier question about coaching career stuff. Do I eat raw eggs? No, not regularly. Do you eat raw eggs, Sousa? No. Does a liver king eat raw eggs? He did something the other day.

He had like 75 raw eggs, but I heard that raw eggs, if they're not, have less protein. You think that's true? That cooked eggs have more protein. No, cause doesn't heat usually denature the protein. That's it reduces protein content. I don't know. I hope you're right. Proteins are denatured with heat.

Yeah. Denatured. You guys know stuff. It unravels it. Unravels, yeah. Look at that. I tried to open my mouth and put it on my mic once, and I hurt my jaw. Put what on your mouth?

I tried to open my mouth and put it on my mic once. Do you remember that episode, Hobart? The cramp. Yeah, I got a jaw cramp. This thing's too big. Isaiah, well done. Barbelljobs.com. Check it out.

That's good. All right. There it is. Companies being great. Let's talk about Amazon. No, Keith. The opposite. I know.

He's making fun of me. He's making fun of me. He's making fun of you big time. He's making fun of me he's making fun of me he's making money big time like can i read to you can i read before you go to amazon i want to tell you a couple more things that are five inches yeah 2.5 pink erasers a small teaspoon okay that's it okay that was the list i mean mean, I thought it was... How many things are nine inches? You're a good dude. Actually, yeah. Yeah.

Go ahead. I dare you. I dare you. Go ahead and ruin half of our listeners' nights, Emily. Ruin it. Do it. Smash it down. We're not even close to three hours yet we got time go ahead

and ruin half of every more than half go ahead every 90 of our male listeners bezo's dick oh my god oh you know i don't i'm gonna be sex positive here and say that every if you look at actually i have a kudoska manual right here on different dick sizes let me wow wait wait hold that book up hold that book up so everyone here can buy it i can't believe she has access to that just like that bam damn what body part is that that is some ugly ass shit i mean that's beautiful that's lovely so wait closer i want to read can you read some of the stuff next to him do each of those have like a name like those are the kind of cocks there are yeah sorry i can't figure out the camera uh yeah like this is a deer man yes go on isn't this like a thing where like the the penis shape and size there's like a

coordinated vagina shape and size like depth and uh no i mean you know if you are um of a certain like uh length then yeah you're going to be at your i think biologically imprinted in you is you're going to be attracted to a specific type of yoni. But this just actually goes through, like you have the coyote man, which is actually probably the five-incher. Why are they all circumcised? Simone, is that why you howl a lot? Yes. What is it? What's that one pit bull man okay um what's the guy doing a little the little up like

the he's like coming up uh that's a pony man can i see i want to see the pony man hey my friend who has the my friend who has the enormous penis his his wife is is like the only woman who's ever able to take the whole thing and and like they're a fit they're like perfect fit yeah yeah like a lock and key and and i'd asked him about i said the first time i saw it i asked him the two questions i asked him is how big does that get when it's erect? And can anyone take the whole thing? And he says, he feels bad. He just doesn't put the whole thing in anyone.

He says, you see their face, you see their face, and you stop. Oh, yeah. Hold on. Hold on. Are you done talking or what? My man's asking if we're done talking cocks in here so first he came in first he came in and brought the food in to be like yo this is my girl and now he's like enough of the cock talk we'll switch

no more we can move i'm close to finishing the news stories which is actually nice for once tell me we're sorry okay i'll just turn off my cam because he's got to get his PJs. Oh, okay. Okay. All right. Let's go. So as you might know, Kentucky recently hard hit by tornadoes in this past week, killing more than 70 people in Kentucky alone and across, I think, four different states,

a cost of $18 billion in damages. I think four different states, a cost of $18 billion in damages. When one tornado hit two miles from her house, Amazon worker Leslie Campbell missed her warehouse shift. After sheltering with her mother through the night, 33-year-old Campbell left at 4.45 a.m. for her Saturday shift at Amazon warehouse in Campbellsville, Kentucky. Because Siobhan had just overnighted Yoni Beads on his Prime account,

she took the job as a picker in September because the early hours gave her flexibility to help her sister, a single mother. En route, Campbell was turned back by police searching for survivors near a sheep farm destroyed by the storm. She stopped in a church, the only place where she could find cell service. Coincidence? I think not. Thank you, Jesus. And called Amazon's

HR team known as the Employee Resource Center or the ERC. Campbell said she explained she was physically unable to make it to her shift due to tornado damage. On the other end of the line, the ERC representative told her it had no record of twisters in her area. For Campbell, missing work put her attendance record in negative UPT, according to screenshots viewed by Insider. Amazon gives workers a certain amount of, excuse me,

unpaid time off or UPT dipping into negative UPT or taking more than the allotted can be grounds for dismissal. After attempting to drive to work two more times with no luck, Campbell tried reaching a company executive on Twitter that afternoon, Amazon, Amazon retail chief, Dave Clark had posted a tweet acknowledging the Amazon workers killed by a tornado after their warehouse collapse in Illinois.

Six people have now been confirmed dead at that Illinois facility. Campbell tweeted in response. I'm an Amazon worker from Kentucky. Tornado hit two miles from my house and I physically couldn't get to work. The ERC human resource team at Amazon told me that they had no record of tornadoes in Kentucky and couldn't help me with not getting attendance time reduced for today. Campbell's tweet generated hundreds of responses. And among the wave of replies was one from Clark,

the retail chief Campbell said, an HR rep called her back, told her Amazon would excuse her shadow Saturday shift and pay her for the 11 hours she missed. It's a great company doing great things. Fired. Fire that bitch. Why do you say that? Because, like, fuck you for

fucking complaining on social media. It's a fucking job. She had no one else to reach out to. I don't get it. Oh, so you tweet shit. So you tweet it. Hey, you know you work for a big-ass company. You know fucking that there's the protocol and everyone there's a robot. Write a letter, take a picture

of the fucking building destroyed, and wait a couple days. But no, you gotta tweet like a bitch. I think tweeting's a... And all the hating on amazon i think how about be thankful how about be thankful you have a fucking job oh it is uh you tweet something about crossfit tomorrow like when you go there and your parking space is taken and you tweet my parking space is never taken i get there before everybody else right i know i just i think complaining about

your job i just feel like it's very socially acceptable and like a normal way for people to communicate. So I don't think it's that big of it. Like so is eating with both hands, but it's, but it's not. I thought it was a nice story on that note, eating with both hands.

I'm going to sign off you guys. It was an absolute pleasure. Miss Abbott. Have a good night. Thank you. Bye. Take care. It was a blast especially you matt i think i got the most out of you thank you i appreciate that

and then there were three she was she's great love miss abbott fantastic i think she had to go pee you think she got a text message from her man saying that hey enough that penis talk maybe okay let's finish these stories two hours and 28 minutes jake paul yes you're you're really uh you're a fighting fan savann right yes it was hard for me not to purchase the fight last night it was very hard for me not to so but i was done i'd already seen out yeah let's just hit that people we get my who cares just do it yeah just do it okay smash them you know there's people claiming that he threw that yes yeah they're insane they're insane you think that's a real knockout yeah

well anyway so look look at the faint before look at the faint before look we just watch one more time watch how he faints here go all the way back to the beginning look at right there he faints sees what he does bang and then boom they said that little turn with the glove that little turn that was the signal for him to go down someone saying that that's what i know that was the article i read um online oh there's no way. I don't know. I don't think that looks fake. Well, the fall isn't fake for sure. Look how he even gets up. One, by no means an expert, but

this is the second time Jake Paul's beat Tyrone Woodley, right? The first time was by split decision, by decision, and this time it was a knockout. It's Tyron. It's Tyron. People say Tyron. I used to call him Tyron too knockout it's tyrant it's tyrant people say tyrone i used to call him tyrone too but it's tyrant um i believe tyron actually does look tyrant but anyway um over the past 12 months i guess jake paul has won three times two knockouts perhaps perhaps most importantly he's emerged as one of the most bankable pay-per-view stars in combat sports is he a good boxer i don't really follow it who tyron well tyron he's a he's a very accomplished

ufc like multiple time ufc amazing yeah he was amazing and then something happened to him he was an amazing ufc fighter he lost a fight he got the shit beat out of him and then his next like smashed by this youtube star yeah and then he lost like three or four fights in the ufc like he just lost his edge and then basically then he went in the boxing ring with this guy and didn't expect much you know his brother fought floyd mayweather he's also massive compared to tyron he also has you know 20 pounds on tyron and 5 inches or whatever. 5 inches. Yeah. 2 pink erasers or 6 pennies.

Yeah, 6 and a half pennies. He has one penis on him. What was interesting is I guess this fight card sold approximately 500,000 pay-per-view buys. By way of comparison, the average number of UFC buys in 2018 was 450,000 per event. The Khabib versus McGregor fight was 2.4 million buys.

He's also an excellent shit talker. And I liked that he said, I just knocked out a five-time UFC champion and embarrassed your whole company looking into cameras speaking I imagine to Dana White yes he went on to say everyone's a target no one's safe hide your kids hide your wife I'm like Santa Claus I'm coming down your chimney I'll fuck everybody up I'll fuck your whole family up so um I don't really watch fighting I don't know if this is embarrassing to people in the fight world but um I don't know seems like it's getting more people interested in boxing, which is good. I'd like to tell you this. 10 pennies is nine and a half inches.

Sorry, sorry, sorry. 10 quarters is nine and a half inches. Do you have a quarter? So if you put 10 quarters, you know, lay them on the table,

edge to edge to edge, they would be nine and a half inches, 10 quarters. $2 and 50 cents. Do we like this guy jake paul uh we like him more and more every every time he proves that he's the real deal i mean that yeah i like him that other guy he was i don't know if i like him but i like him tyson fury's brother right would he like to beat the shit out of that guy i like his mom i don't know it's crazy jake paul's it's nuts jake paul's crazy what he's doing is crazy i like his mom. I like his mom. I don't know. It's crazy. Jake Paul's, it's nuts.

Jake Paul's crazy. What he's doing is crazy. I like his mom. His mom's cool as shit. His dad's cool as shit. I think it's just a lesson on marketing. He's a marketing genius. I mean, they're not a fighter.

They're handpicking these fights that there's a high chance that he's going to win, whether or not we agree that they're rigged or not. And that he trains his ass off, no doubt. But he's a marketer, you know, it's always onto the next fight, the big show. What was his YouTube channel all about?

It used to be just breaks back in the day. He was on vine and it was super short, like, you know, pretend to fall in front of somebody way back in the day. And it slowly built up. And if you remember, there was controversy a couple of years back when they went to some

forbidden forest in, in Japan. And they found some, it was like a couple years back when they went to some forbidden forest in Japan. And they found some, it was like suicide forest or whatever it was called. And there was actually somebody hanging from a tree. And they, like, filmed it and laughed. And he was canceled early. Oh, that's right. Yeah, you remember?

That was his brother. His brother was the super famous one. And Jake Paul's kind of taken over. Yeah. They've always done a great job of ping-ponging it back and forth and they're very they're very wise with their decisions of how they kind of strategically sequence themselves i heard that he said he wanted to fight mike tyson i'd love to see that yes yes paul his brother does want he is going to fight mike tyson i bet he's going tyson will crush him yeah i think tyson is going to not but but i've always thought all these i've always

thought they're going to lose if i bet on on someone against them, that means they're going to win. Look at this guy. I remember that. Tyron wrote a rap song, I'll beat your ass, and then he never won another fight. I think that's actually accurate. I want to hear it. A throw pillow, Hobart, is 18 inches, the average throw pillow. So if you and I held on to the end of a throw pillow each end naked

the heads of our penises would barely touch just like this i was gonna say we wouldn't even cover two-thirds of the pillow romantic oh so good we're gonna dock when trump attacks yes adamzinger, one of two Republicans in the House committee investigating the deadly 6th of January Capitol attack incited by. Trump and Emily have the same color hair. Incited by Donald. No, they don't. Donald Trump. Yes, they do.

Said on Sunday he was not yet ready to declare the former president guilty of a crime, but the panel was investigating the likelihood that he is. At a Stop the Steal rally near the White House, if you don't remember, on January 6th, the then, I think they kept calling it 6th January, the then president urged supporters to march on Capitol and fight like hell or you're not going to have a country anymore. Earlier this month at a sentencing hearing for one of the riders, a district judge, Amy. Wait a second. Wait a second. What, what, where did you get this story? Probably like a great news source like CNN.

No, this is from Guardian. Guardian. Okay. Okay. Go on. He, where he said, fight like hell. Fight like hell or you're not gonna have a country anymore. Earlier this month at a sentencing hearing for one of the six January rioters, a district court judge, Amy Berman Jackson, said she believed Trump stoked the riot and should be held accountable.

Jackson was one of the growing number of federal judges to speak out against Trump. Let me read let me read you this line from the speech. This is from ABC News transcript of Trump's speech on January 6th. And you have to know that I'm not a Trump supporter, but I am a supporter of the truth. And I read this entire transcript and it says here, you ready? I know that everyone here will soon be marching over to the Capitol building to peacefully and patriotically make your voices heard. Let me read that to you one more time. I know that everyone here will soon be marching over to the Capitol building to peacefully and patriotically make your voices heard. There it is. ABC News is fucking liberal and biased as you get even they but you got to dig

you got to dig it's the same thing with when they said he was racist towards mexicans you got to dig and you got to read what he said and all he said was he said some stuff along the line that hey they're not sending us their best people they're sending us rapists and blah blah blah of course they are and it has nothing to do. And if you think that's racist, it's because you're racist. Okay, good. I got in my racist little high horse thing. So what was that?

What? You held off. Thank you. Thank you. Walk peacefully. I know it's these people. And what sucks is here. I don't care if you hate him.

But what you're doing is you're undermining everything by lying the news is underlying everything by undermining everything by lying just tell the truth there's plenty of reasons to hate trump you got to make shit up yeah you don't have to make shit up for that yeah he's got plenty of like weird most politicians in general who's this guy? Kissinger. He's one of the Republicans on the House committee that's investigating the deadly 6th January capital attack.

And to give you one more thing, there was $30 million worth of damage done. There were no fires set. And although I think it's despicable to enter that building, and I'm okay with any force that would have been used to stop Democrats and Republican senators to keep them safe by any means necessary, I don't think you should be allowed to do any of that. I think there should be a hard line on that. It's $700 million damage that was done in Ferguson. Hundreds of millions of dollars done in Seattle. Taking police stations. They lit a police station on fire, these people, while police were inside and they had to be rescued from the rooftop with a helicopter.

I mean, this shit is insane. I don't want to hear anything about the fucking capital until we fucking are honest about all of it. Okay. How was that? Was that still pretty reserved, Hobart? No, it was good. Okay. Oh, where are we at in time?

Yeah, we got two stories left. Dang. Do you think Emily left because she was upset? I think she had to pee. You're really self-conscious, huh? Yeah, more than self-conscious. I'm self-aware. I'm from Hollow Earth.

Hey, at least you didn't say, like, you bought the most out of you. No, no, yeah, I don't like it. I was like, I'm only 11. It was like we went on a date and she just got out of the car we were driving by i wish goodbye but i don't know i i trust i trust her to be honest because you have a fucking three minute fran time or two minute fran time you can walk around like that i only have a nine inch dick okay go hot i just i just here's the thing. I just, I hope there wasn't too much boy talk and penis.

Like we didn't bum her out. I felt like she had a book. We spent the first hour of the show talking about Yoni power. Yeah. Well, we'll know if she comes on next week. You referenced the book off her top shelf. That was easy to grab. I don't know if that's going to be too much penis talk for her yeah okay maybe it was the fact maybe it was all the

talk about that movie where the people's mouths are so to the other people's anuses that for sure was not okay i think she liked hobart. That was good. Okay. And anytime she got even a tiny bit, gave Hobart any about any of that energy, he brought up the centipede movie to get me back. You got to have a defense, man. Yes. I am.

I'm the anti Yoni. I poop my pants. Like anytime a girl gets close to him, he did. He can't. I shit my pants. He starts picking his nose. poop my pants like anytime a girl gets close to him he did he can't i shit my pants he starts picking his nose um the united states supreme court's decision last week to leave in place a texas law banning most abortions gives states a chance to restrict other rights including gun

ownership to do that states could pass laws copying the texas laws enforcement procedure however it is unclear how many states will do so. We'll pause here for a second. Back to the Texas law, specifically the court questioned whether the state officials, let me go a little bit further. The Texas law SB8 is to say that when doctors say a woman is six weeks pregnant, it typically means the embryo started developing about four weeks ago. The heart,

which can be seen flickering on an ultrasound is still maturing and cannot be heard until several, several weeks later. Why don't they say beating? Why do they say flickering? Cause, Oh, sorry.

Some can be seen flickering on an ultrasound. Cause that's what it looks like. Oh, okay. Okay. Um, you said that. Sorry. that's what it looks like. Oh, okay, okay. You said that. Sorry. Yeah, it's my fault. No, my fault.

So essentially, the Texas law takes enforcement away from state officials. That way, the law avoids judicial review. Instead, the SB8 law permits private citizens to sue anyone who performs or assists a woman in getting an abortion after about six weeks into the pregnancy the law awards ten thousand dollars to citizens for successful lawsuits it's expected that arkansas wait a second we're we're that's encouraging snitching it's it's pretty much it allows you private citizen to sue anyone who performs or assists a woman in getting an abortion beyond the six-week period like so even so if i found out like my neighbor got an abortion at like nine weeks i could sue the doctor who did it that's

kind of what it's aimed at yeah this is fucking insanity why don't they just make it illegal if they want to do that and then just leave it at that well this is a really interesting question if you just make the thought of trying to get citizens to snitch on other citizens me too with money like outside of like just telling but like to pay them to snitch it's fucking insane totally agreed and I think it's going to cause a cascade of states basically politicizing this procedure. So, for example, one of the reasons you don't have the state outlawing it is because if you don't have the government, it's harder to make the case that the governing body itself is not is um not inflicting not interrupting um it's obstructing is obstructing a constitutional right it's much harder to make that case in this way because it's not the state or any specific group like a legislature inside of the state that is obstructing the constitutional right to the abortion um it's basically a private citizen you know seeking a remedy after the fact now i don't get

this this is fucking bullshit this can't be no no it's going to get better so arkansas florida idaho indiana south dakota oklahoma are suspected to push to pass similar bills. Now, what you're also seeing happen, like I said, is there are sort of these equivalent happening in states of different political leanings. For example, the day after the Supreme Court decision related to SBA, California governor, your governor, Gavin Newsom, a Democrat, began to work on a bill to limit gun use. This would also permit private citizens to sue anyone who builds, distributes or sells assault weapons or self-built ghost guns. Citizens would be also be awarded at least $10,000 in damages. Wow.

This is fucking nuts. Why not just make it do it? It's bad enough when people tattle. Yeah. I don't think it's a great idea to, um, create, you know, this ask the citizenry to sell police, you know, it's like we want to defund the police, but now we're just going to ask private citizens essentially to adjudicate constitutional issues, which is about as – if that's not – if this is an insanity of the times we're living in, I don't know what is. There's so much fucked up shit. I did a ride-along with the police one time in the Bay Area, and they went to this parking lot where there's three hotels share a parking lot, like a Motel 6, a Motel 7, and a Motel 3, whatever, just three shitholes. six a motel seven and a motel three whatever you know just three shitholes and the cop went up to each of the uh front desks and got a list of all the people staying at the fucking hotel and then

ran their names and there was one person there who was like uh on probation and they tried to arrest him and i was fucking disgusted by that i was fucking disgusted and it's like a trade-off with the hotels then to keep them safe. And it's like, I'm all for busting bad guys. I'm all for whether abortion is legal or illegal, enforcing it. But to pay citizens to tattle on each other? Well, I mean, in some ways, this has been around for a long time. Like, for example, like a wanted poster and you know you get a reward for any you know evidence or tips leading to the arrest of simon matosian you know you can even you can call you can just well well someone warned me they were doing that to me on instagram basically i kept getting reports on my three playing brothers because my boys were working out with their shirts off and i got so many fucking reports that my account started getting posts pulled down and all sorts of crazy shit and finally someone who works over at facebook contacted me anonymously and he goes you know what And I got so many fucking reports that my account started getting posts pulled down and all sorts of crazy shit.

And finally, someone who works over at Facebook contacted me anonymously and he goes, you know what they're doing? And I said, no. He said, they're reporting these. And if they get enough, Facebook by law then has to contact local authorities and Child Protective Services has to open an investigation on you. Like, that's just some malicious shit. And you can also do that. You know, you could just call the cops and you can also do that you know you could just call the cops and say hey my my neighbors are dealing cocaine and and the cops can get a

warrant for your house i've seen it it's fucking nuts and they raided this dude's house is there any repercussion for being wrong like if you did all these cops didn't have any repercussion they were just fucking assholes they just fucking came came in and fucked this dude I know his fucking whole life all up. And he didn't have any fucking drugs. He didn't do drugs. They actually found something else in his house. I can't remember how exactly it played out. But it wasn't a big deal.

And he fucking got destroyed for that too. It was fucking nuts. They arrested your ass. I'm not telling the story exactly right you're right but it wasn't my ass that got arrested but i but i'm protecting the names to changing the names to protect innocent but anyway um it's going to be really interesting to see how other states were you know quote unquote republican states democratic states start to use the structure of this law to enforce their own

political agendas. It's pretty wild. Yeah. I don't like it. Yeah. I don't think it's a great idea. And it's also, I think it'll be very difficult to present this back to the Supreme court because it's really hard. I think to plead this case effectively and find out um understand who the proper proper targets are for the case and like who's actually obstructing the constitutional right it's super bizarre dude we're gonna hear stories of kids who are addicted to fentanyl who are turning their parents in for shit so that they can get the 10th out they're gonna be i got this idea i'm serious it's it's gonna be nuts it's gonna it's gonna be nuts um all right i'm gonna skip that's sad that's the worst story you've ever read that is sad yeah that's why i i wanted i wanted to i wanted emily to be on for that one but

we'll finish on a happy one we're just gonna going to go one little, a little fluff story. Then we'll wrap it up. Penises are getting larger. Spider-Man. No, no, they're not. Spider-Man. No spoilers. Spider-Man.

No way home scores. Third best opening weekend ever. Now here's what's interesting. Probably average price of a movie ticket is around $10. I tried to find how often does someone go see the same movie twice in the same day, but I couldn't really find too much about that. Starting at 3 p.m. on Thursday afternoon, and by the end of the day, Spider-Man No Way Home had already grossed $50 million. So that's 5 million people, potentially. That was the third best preview number behind only avengers endgame 60 million

star wars the force awakens 57 million the two highest grossing domestic films of all time through friday night it had bested force awakens with 121 million dollars and trailed only avengers endgame which made 157.4 million dollars um in that three-day span for the best preview Friday start ever by the two-day span. By the end of the weekend, it had grossed a whopping $253 million, more in three and a half days than any other film released in 2021. Every film opening to over $200 million has joined what they call the $600 million club, a number that No Way Home has already hit worldwide. Worldwide, No Way Home has reached $587 million without counting China, suggesting we could also be looking at the first film to hit the billion dollar mark since star Wars,

the rise of Skywalker, the last Tom Holland entry, Spider-Man far from home grossed $1.13 billion in 2019. Who's Tom Holland. Who's Tom Holland. He's the actor of spot in Spider-Man Peter Parker. Okay. Is there a little picture of him?

Anyway. Hey, I know about this movie before you. Okay. Is there a little picture of him? Anyway. Hey, did you even know about this movie before you... Okay, go ahead. With two weekends of Christmas vacation coming for schools, the only thing that can stop the film's momentum is another worldwide shutdown. Maybe Marvel should be employing its stars to do ads to get vaccinated and boosted.

It says that? That's the last line in the article that's for you this is my little treat to you merry christmas you are an asshole dude i just saw a story that basically said there's a cruise ship out there right now where they have a like a full-blown outbreak and every single person on the ship's vaccinated hey did you even know about this movie by the way who goes and i tried to watch star uh uh some the star wars series with my kids it's horrible that like the star wars sucks and i tried to watch avengers endgame dude it's like watching someone play a video game it's garbage it is i like a lot of the marvel movies i didn't love endgame um i like the first x-men where they where they told the the the story of um wolverine and then i like that one wolverine that was just wolverine where he gets old and dies at the end oh that's the saddest movie

i like earlier i like the batman one where they like where christian bale's in it and he's like he he has to like he becomes batman i like all the origin story i like the first uh iron man but as soon as it starts just turning to fight movies go fuck yourself that's why i like casino royale so much did you like that did you see that i like that movie a lot yeah yeah i just need character development tons of it i tried to watch the new bond i couldn't i made it i made about an hour through and i just stopped i agree colin what he said he said he's not that into spider-man i like spider-man hey did you see the cartoon one with the black spider-man um the spider-verse um okay enter the spider-verse yeah it's great yeah someone told me about it and i'm like oh please fucking woke spider-man and i've since then i've watched it probably three times with my kids and

i don't watch movies over and over it's so fucking good he's a cool character yeah he it's awesome well that's what i got for you that's the news how about um this movie, Venom? I liked the first one. I didn't watch the new one. How about the movie with, who's the funny guy who plays Deadpool? Do you know what I'm talking about? Deadpool? Ryan Reynolds.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Deadpool is a weird movie. Fucking hated the movie, but loved the movie. It was weird. Like, I'm like, this is so stupid, but I really like Ryan Reynolds. He's incredible. Yeah, the character is cool.

I just think it becomes like, it's just like, oh, it's the same joke for two hours. What about this new movie he's in where he turns into like a super buff dude? Free Guy. Yeah, how's that? I have not watched it. Are you going to no um i saw scorsese movie last night it's about a guy let me guess everyone died in the end did everyone die in the end i can't remember but it's about a it's about a um uh a poker player card player a guy who goes to jail and counts cards. Oh yeah, it is a shitty ending.

His movies are so... They're the same. Every movie does the same. Yeah, it is a shitty ending. Good Teller's Departed, Casino. It's worse than everyone does. And they're all longer than they should be. Yeah, this movie wasn't

too long. This movie wasn't too long. What's a good movie to see is there anything good how did you even know that this spider-man was out hobart yeah i didn't know that oh how would you know where did you know how do you know well it's because i travel still a fair amount and like so i'm just kind of always seeing like if movies are coming out on planes and that kind of stuff oh right do you watch movies on planes i mean their movies or do you take your own iPad? A little mix of both.

Wow. Sometimes it's fun to be limited by like, just kind of flicking through. Maybe I'll go watch an old movie, a little classic, something like that. I just wish I was, I don't think I'll ever fly again.

I really like, um, I really like like, uh, Kung Fu movies. So it's like the new, uh, the new Marvel movie, Shang Chi was really cool. Cause it has like a,

just some really nice tropes and elements from like just classic Kung Fu films. Oh yeah. I kind of want to see that too. Hey, why didn't you help us with the Dubai CrossFit championships this week? Well, I was working and then I flew home to Boston to, for, um, is it sister? You were teaching seminars? No, I was not, but I worked Thursday, Friday, and then we flew home for Cassandra's sister's birthday.

And I also just, I went home and visited my mom on Saturday and we worked out and she just did some stuff around the house. But, but the, the fitness challenges at three in the morning in the United States, you could have just woke up early and helped us. You didn't ask. You were on the thread. You're on the thread. Yeah.

I, it's just not, I don't know. I'm not super, it wasn't super interesting to me. And I'm also frustrated because I'm tired of watching Roman Krennikoff win these fucking competitions and not get to compete at the games. Like I'm, I want to see, he's's he's someone I want to see compete so bad. Super psyched to see Laura on the podium. I think she's awesome. Hot take Ricky on Ricky. I think it's funny how everyone's like, oh, you know, Frazier Frazier retired because Ricky was coming back. And it's just like,

don't forget dipshits that Frazier won five times so let's say Ricky wins the games this year it almost still doesn't mean dick it's awesome accomplishment like I'm not taking anything away it's something I never did was never even close was a shitty individual games athlete at best but it's just like all right guys give it a break you know it's like if he wins six times, sure. Then we can have that conversation. But,

um, if Ricky wins, he's the greatest. Exactly. If Ricky wins, it undermines every single one of Matt's wins. And here, here's,

here's the other thing though. Matt already beat him when Ricky was on the gear. Ricky was on gear and he only finished fucking third. Like, but he was only 14 years old. Was he only 14? don't know what great hey do you know what ricky should do he should be he should go into movies you think i mean he's just he's so photogenic dude it's great go to his instagram he's fucking so phot. I'll go check out his gram. He needs to be a fucking,

he should be an underwear model. I'm all for the forgiveness. He's got the face that looks like it's been like, he looks like a fighter that's had the shit beat out of him and is still handsome. Like he's just got it. So I don't care about what drugs he's done. I don't like looking at that stuff.

It just makes me mad about how I don't have that. Oh yeah. That's a good pick. Oh, please. Look at these surfer's picks. Look at the way you look. Damn. Yeah, yeah, those are the ones I'm talking about.

Yeah, that one's sitting in front of the van. He's just a hunk. Dude. I do really want to see Roman Krennikov, if my opinion matters at all. I want to see him compete at the game so fucking bad. Speaking of Reptilian, you'll do what? Sign off on his visa? I would sponsor him a reptilian visa if it helps he you'll do what sign off on his visa i would sponsor him if i could if that helps like i don't care like i james hobart promised that while he's here he will not do anything illegal if so i will pay the fine if so you can sue me

for ten thousand dollars or something yeah you can take the house that cassandra and I bought. Yeah. He looks reptilian. Romanov, Kromanov, Krechniov, Roman. Yeah, and his arms are so big. He put on 20 pounds. Did you see that? Since the last time he competed.

Yeah, I guess he's trying to get strong. What's the next big competition for the games? Now is it just everyone's just all eyes on the open? A palooza, palooza. What a palooza. So here's the reason why we needed you this weekend. There was a workout that was the final workout. It was, I think it was four movements.

It was nine rope climbs, and then it was 15 jerks at 225, and then a bunch of deadlifts with um 90 pound dumbbells and then you had to front rack the 98 pound 90 pound dumbbells and lunge across yeah and we were we were we had a a cool debate on whether anyone could do 225 shoulder to overhead you know uh 15 times oh did somebody do it in the competition yeah someone did yeah i would be surprised yeah and and for like and i was just like there's no fucking way anyone's doing that unbroken and i needed someone you that like you there to be like dude shut up it's not that much weight yeah exactly for those guys right and so it was nuts i'll humble brag myself i think when i was one of the things i did my best i jerked 275

for nine wow um and just while someone was while someone was stimulating your cream master while i was holding it oh shit why doesn't knock my mic off while i was holding a yoni egg no i'm not terribly strong like i just i hear that i'm like yeah those guys could do that no problem i mean fraser was hitting that 245 last year in that two years ago at the games No, I'm not terribly strong. Like I just, I hear that. I'm like, yeah, those guys could do that. No problem. I mean, Fraser was hitting that 245 last year in that two years ago with the games shoulder overhead on broken. That was what? Seven to nine reps. Yeah.

Yeah. It's not. That might've been 225, but either way, I just, um, yeah, there's, there's so fit. It's ridiculous. Hey, if Emily comes on the show next week, I need to start the show with a yoni egg in my mouth and not talk for the first couple minutes and then just be like, sorry, just doing a little work.

Another way to think about it is a lot of those guys were clean and jerking 350, 360, 225, 60% of that. So if you took 60% of your best clean and jerk and I was like, put this fucking thing over your head as many times as you can like you probably could yeah that's what people feel like you look at start looking at the percentages and that's when you realize just how nuts these people are yeah nuts that's a really good point damn yeah how hobart how confident are you that you will podium this coming year?

If I train and make it a priority, very confident, but it's sort of, um, it's kind of on the back burner right now for a couple of different reasons, but really she's pregnant. Your wife's pregnant. No, she's not. She's not. Uh, what are some of the reasons? Just with things related to work. Oh, like you would know the workouts ahead of time and you couldn't participate? Potentially. Is that really one of them? Yeah.

Oh, that sucks. Dude, you could win it this year. I'd like to think I could. In exciting fashion fashion you'll throw the first event like you did last year yeah no i just i just didn't try i'm just a shitty runner god it's crazy to hear you say that uh matthew souza james hobart great new show well will you be on next Sunday. Hobart. The 26. Yeah.

Christmas show. Post-Christmas show. That's awesome. You don't have like some family obligation or some shit or. No, Cassandra's whole family's coming out, but we're going to, we're going to do it.

All right.