The Sevan Podcast - #24 - Meredith Root and Alex Parker

Episode Date: April 7, 2021

The Sevan Podcast EP 24 - Meredith Root & Alex Parker & Brian Friend The Sevan Podcast is sponsored by http://www.barbelljobs.com Follow us on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/therealsevanpodcast/ Sevan's Stuff: https://www.instagram.com/sevanmatossian/?hl=en https://app.sugarwod.com/marketplace/3-playing-brothers Support the show Partners: https://cahormones.com/ - CODE "SEVAN" FOR FREE CONSULTATION https://www.paperstcoffee.com/ - THE COFFEE I DRINK! https://asrx.com/collections/the-real... - OUR TSHIRTS ... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Very flavorful. Yodeling with them. I need one your mom joke a week. I was just texting a friend. What's up, Alex? Good. Living the dream. Living the dream. Do you guys know Brian friend?

I do. I recognize Brian friend. Oh, no. Do I hear an echo recognize my friend. Oh, no. Do I hear an echo? Hold on. Seven. It's because we're in the same room. How about now?

Uh-oh. Yeah, I can still. I'm just trying to figure out where the echo is coming from. I think it's gone now. Yeah, because I muted yours. Yeah, it's better. The trick is we're in the same room. We both have headphones on, but they're running through my laptop, not hers. Better. The trick is we're in the same room.

We both have headphones on, but they're running through my laptop, not hers. Bully. I muted you. But can we still hear Alex talk or she's just there as a spectator? Yeah, I can talk. Oh. Yeah. I have met both of you before.

You guys were competing, so you probably don't remember. It was in 2018. I do remember. Well, I mean, you look familiar. You have a face. I was. Wow. Okay.

Good to know. No, I spent about probably 15, 20 minutes talking to Mike from M2 at the regional down in Florida that year. I think he was there with you, Meredith. He was actually there. That was when I competed in the West. And then my sister, I have a twin sister, and she was competing in Florida. It's easy to mix this up. That's what I was writing. They went head-to-head,

and we were there at Del Mar. These two ladies went against each other. I remember interviewing you guys afterwards. Yeah. And I remember really, I don't remember a single word of the interview, but I remember I really liked you guys. I'm pretty, like, I just, in my brain, there's something I don't like. I just, too,

that's how I divide the world. That's fair. It's pretty easy. It's simple. You know, it's funny. So I was digging through your Instagram last night, Meredith, and just going back, going back. And I'm like, damn, Meredith's girlfriend looks just like her. What are the odds of that? And I'm just like, this is so crazy. way up. Then you said something about Alex and leaving your sister to go to Canada. I'm like, Oh Jesus. I thought that was for 45 minutes. I'm taking notes and writing down all this stuff. And I'm like, it is so bizarre. I wonder if her and her girlfriend get that all the time that they look exactly like. Yeah. That's what it's, that's a twin. I have twins. Yeah, I know. I mean,

I'm not a twin, but I own some twins. Yeah. They're fun to own. I mean, like, I don't know. I'm not actually sure that they're fun to own. I think we were actually kind of a pain.

They're not fun to date. They are so fun to own. I wonder about that too, Alex. I'm wondering, I'm wondering how that's good. Who's dated a twin. When I ever say like,

Oh yeah, Meredith's a twin. They're like, Oh no, I dated a twin once. I only tripped. The only thing I think right away is ever say like, Oh yeah, Meredith's a twin. They're like, Oh no, I dated a twin once. I only tripped. The only thing I think right away is, is like,

Oh man, is Alex attracted to her sister? Like, like, like they're going to bring it. They're going to bring it. They're going to bring it. They're going to bring a maid home.

And the other ones, the mates can be like, wait, wait a minute. Can I, can I, do I upgrade or what? What's the deal here?

Meredith jokes that her sister, she and her sister are pretty different. It's like, uh, Meredith jokes that they look very similar when they're both soaking wet because her sister makeup and does her hair every day. So I can always tell the difference. Let's talk about the most controversial, uncomfortable, weirdest thing about you guys and just get it out of the fucking way. Okay, let's go. Do you really like Canada? Oh, man.

I mean, I do. Because you act like you do on your Instagram. And I want to tell you, it makes me really uncomfortable. I like all the activities and stuff here. Yeah. It's been a nice change for me. It's, um, like we live really close to Banff and some like very popular tourist areas. And I have to say, it's been really nice this year specifically because the border closed. And so there's no

tourists. Cause usually Banff is like, it's like the capital, it's like selfie stick capital of the world. And it go there in the summertime which is when it's the most beautiful i think and so it's been nice to not have to like battle with people and their selfie sticks is that your way of avoiding being racist are you saying there's a lot of japanese tourists there it is a very popular tourist destination for Asians. They go Vancouver. I think Vancouver gets a lot of Chinese immigration, and then the Chinese population travels to Banff kind of exclusively in the summertime. And that's not being racist.

I don't know a lot of them. It's a cultural phenomenon, but the two can be conflated so easy this year. But I don't think you'll be canceled. No one in Canada can get canceled. And. And there's a, there's a huge population out in Western Canada. My sister lives in Vancouver and she said that the last several years has just been massive influx from Asia. Yeah. And it's kind of jacking up the housing market in Vancouver too. Cause a lot of, uh, definitely. Right. Yeah. They buy like properties to rent and it's just, it's kind of, it's messing it up for people who are trying to live there year-round. I don't know the exact details, but Canada did something where if you put a million dollars in the bank there,

you could then move there, and then you could also – did you guys hear that? Yeah. What was that? Oh, a noise? Oh, I just heard – oh, yeah, yeah. I just heard some weird noise. There was some incentive there that was incentivizing a lot of rich Chinese people to move there. And I think it was during a time that the Chinese population, the public, and I don't know the economics about it, but they were pulling their money out of their country as fast as they could.

I don't know the economics about it, but they were pulling their money out of their country as fast as they could. And there were a few cities. I think Sydney and Vancouver and Hong Kong basically just got destroyed. They had just too much money come in too fast. I jumped on a plane once in San Francisco to go to Vancouver. This is, I don't know, six or seven years ago. And as I'm getting on the plane, I realized, oh, I'm the only white person on the plane. These are all Chinese people. And I started really having anxiety like I was getting on the wrong plane. I'm like, oh, the only white person on the plane. These are all Chinese people. And I started like really having anxiety. Like I was getting on the wrong plane.

I'm like, oh shit. Oh shit. I need to double check. This doesn't make any sense. But, and they did everything in Chinese and in English. It was cool. All, you know, but that's how many, um, and the city was beautifully clean with tons and tons of vacancies. Like you were saying, they were just buying up, they were finding a place to shelter their money, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. It makes sense. Meredith, are you going through any kind of process to try to get a residency in Canada or anything like that? I only ask because my mom and sister both tried and my mom was basically unable to do it and my sister was successful in doing so. Yeah. So I actually have residency. I'm a permanent resident, which is the Canadian equivalent

of like having a green card in the U S um, the process for me, it was, it's kind of complicated coming from the, coming from the U S they like Canada has a lot of like handshake agreements with countries like, like the UK and Australia. It's very easy, not as easy for us citizen. So I basically came over on a one year limited work visa and then immediately started applying for permanent residency because that process takes up to a year and then it can take, you know, another year to be approved. So I got that last year, I think actually. And then if I stay here for three out of the next five years, I can apply for Canadian citizenship, which is a similar process to what goes on in the UK or in the US, take an exam or whatever, and go to the courthouse, fill out some paperwork,

and then you're a dual citizen. Will all that go away when you guys get married? I saw you guys, congratulations, by the way, you guys got engaged on October 10th, 2020. Very specific. Yes, yes, 2020. Very specific. Yes, yes, yes. Very thorough. And will that go away when you guys get married? Can you just plug into Alex's citizenship or how does that work? It doesn't go away.

It's similar to the US where a lot of people think if you get married, you're just automatically a citizen. If I didn't have my permanent residency yet, it would accelerate that process. But as far as the time to take the citizen exam, all the residency requirements stay the same. So it doesn't eliminate that process for me anyways. And also, we don't have a date. So it's like, if I can take the exam next year, I don't even know if we'll be married before then. Why did you guys choose Canada? By the way, Banff sounds awesome, by the way. I haven't been there, but I've heard a ton about it. But why did you choose Canada over North Carolina? You draw straws or? I was about to start working at a law firm and I couldn't give that up. Like it was, it started on, I actually took a year

off when I graduated law school. Before I started articling, I asked for that year so I could compete in CrossFit and that's when we met. So when it was up for debate, whether I was going to move there or she was going to move here, it wasn't really a debate. She kind of just said like, I'll move, I'll move. So it was an easy decision for me. Yeah. Cause you don't have to go here. It wasn't really a debate. She kind of just said like, I'll move, I'll move. So it was an easy decision for me. Yeah. Cause you don't have to go anywhere. And, and hard to leave your sister, Meredith. It was hard. It's, it's hard to leave my family. So that was kind of a weird year for me. I was in, it was a transitional year anyways. So I quit my job back in like the end of 2016 to just play for a year and kind of figure out what I wanted to do. I worked in pharmaceuticals and I was fully planning on going back.

Evil, evil, evil. Evil. Well, biopharmaceuticals, not like, not the bougie first world stuff. Okay. Okay. So I was kind of trying to figure out if I was going to go back to work for that company and what I wanted to do. But, you know, I left a whole life behind. I used to be married to a man. And so it was for me, North Carolina, it's my home. It's where I grew up. But it was also kind of, you know, I felt like it was holding me back. And I even before Alex, before I looked at moving to Calgary, I was sort of kicking around the idea of just moving west to Denver or someplace in California just to kind of like to get away from that for a period of time. Even though it meant leaving my family, it just I needed a bit of a break and a fresh start from the life that I had walked away from.

So you said you were married before Alex. You weren't married before. And is this the first relationship you've had with anyone, Alex, from looking at your Instagram? No, I had dated people before, but this is my first like long term relationship. You basically had the brakes on for anything to let anyone in. Yeah. Is what it sounds like. I did with Meredith, too. And she really pushed through.

It was a lot of pushing away. And like, I think when she finally moved in with me, like when she moved here, she didn't move in with me. She like rented her whole other apartment. And finally when she moved in, she was like, I have infiltrated the premises. It was like a whole operation apparently. I have infiltrated the premises. It was like a whole operation apparently. So you're,

I see that you went and visited her. Oh, we lost Brian. I see that you went and visited her in North Carolina. Well, tell me about the whole courting process. Tell me about the courting process. Cause it's because I don't think it's a little unique because I think,

um, I don't remember which one of your Instagrams it was, but you guys were at a, you guys were out in Miami at a club and one of you was trying to figure out if the other one was interested in you specifically if you were gay. Yeah. Who is that? Who's Instagram? Did I see that on? That was mine. Okay. So yeah, I'm the one that gets really feely on Instagram. Well, Alex, I think Alex is pretty, she lets it hang. She's, she's, she's, she lets it be vulnerable. Um, so, so you know, we're from, so take me back to the earliest beginning. So you spot Alex first on Instagram and then you DM her and then you say something

like, Hey, can you walk me through that? Well, I met alex for the first time at the 2016 games when i was spectating she was spectating um and i just knew her from the internet like it's it's just kind of like it's romance and in 2017 you you meet people on instagram or you recognize them so i was like well i'm gonna go introduce myself to this girl she's cute i don't know anything about her i think she's really funny on the internet. And so that's all like, I, that's literally all I said was like, I, you know, I'm Meredith. I follow you on Instagram. I think you're really funny. Alex's version of the story is that I came up with oogly hard eyes and she knew right away that I loved her. Um, and that was kind of it. And I think she followed me on Instagram after that. And we didn't touch base again until, you know, November later in that year when I was like, I had a feel like I had been kind of scrolling her Instagram. And I was like, I mean, there's no men. She's not dating anybody. If she is dating somebody, they're not on Instagram. And then I found her Facebook and was just trying to find some like sign that she was that she was gay or if she was straight.

Like I just because you have no idea. And it's a difficult question to ask is what if you're wrong. Right. So I just messaged her and I was like, hey, are you doing a lot of Palooza this year? And she sent back and then we just chatted for, you know, six weeks over Instagram and text. And yeah, met up in Miami. And that was that's the end of the story. What was the date on that when you met in Miami? January, middle of January, January 17th, 2017. Of 2017.

Of 2017. Because then I see that there was a picture that you appeared in Alex's Instagram on February 22nd, 2017 for the first time. You made your inaugural appearance. That was basically during the open. Yeah. Let's go back to this. Two things. I want to know what it means to be gay to you because I have my own definition.

And then how do you say it to her? You're just like, do you want another shot? Are you gay? Or like, how do you, or I mean, can't you just like put your arm on her back and find out? Like if she's like, can't you just like body language it or something? Yeah. I think like yeah that's the it's scary when you're not one like for me i i really fear like being embarrassed i've always had that so like my worst fear is to like make a move and be rejected and it's even worse when you make a move and you're rejected because like that person's not gay not Not that I've had that happen,

but it's like, you just, something I would want to avoid. I think I finally was like, well, why did you get a divorce? Um, and that was kind of through me. Cause I'm like, how has someone married for five years? I mean, you, you hear it happen all the time now, but at the time I was like, how has someone married for five years? And then like, like't i was like so i just asked why are you why did you get a divorce she was like well like because i'm gay and i was like oh okay and then she said do you do you want to or do you think i'm gay or something like that and oh that's mean alex that's me she was like that is brutal yes question mark I was like well I am yeah it wasn't awkward at all

it sounds more awkward than it was no it sounds fun it sounds totally fun and flirty but but this thing that Alex this isn't about me Brian don't ask me a question don't ask me a question this is about me no I was gonna say I had a friend who was married for over 40 years and he knew

for basically the entire time that he was gay. But every step that you take down that path, it's more and more difficult to get out. They had a kid. They had a second kid. He was a pastor at a church and it was all this stuff. So to just make that one choice was so much fear for him that took him 40 years to finally get up the courage or just have something in his life trigger being able to do that. Yeah, totally. Yeah. Makes sense. Um, do you guys have your own podcast? We do. Yeah. We started it last year during the pandemic times. It just does something to do. And how often do you guys do it? We have like 20, 25, 26 episodes. So we go through phases where we have a lot of free time and can get an episode or two out a week. And then we'll have a drought of, you know, two or three weeks just kind of

depends on our schedule. Is this topic boring for you? Or are you like, Oh shit, here we go again. No, it's not. I like, uh, I like when people ask us about it, it's a difficult, like, it's difficult for us to just talk about it because it's our reality. I like to answer questions in the way that people perceive us. It's always, it's always different depending on who's asking. So this is the way I prefer to talk about it. Okay, good. Um, uh, before we get to the definition of gay, isn't it weird? No, no one wants to be rejected. Right. So like, like some, um, you know, as a young man and, and, and now it's irrelevant cause I'm married and I have kids and something in me has shifted. But for the first, you know, 20, 30 years of my life, I'm basically just terrified of

women. I'm just terrified of them because I don't want to be, I guess, cause I don't want to be rejected by them. And even my dad told me, I remember like in seventh, eighth grade, Hey, don't worry. The worst that can happen is they can reject you. And it's like, I know it's, it's, it's amazing that the, whatever that mechanism is that we don't want to, and I'm not afraid to get hurt. It wasn't that, I don't know what it is, but for some reason you don't want to just randomly ask someone out. And then of course,

then with being gay, there's obviously the double the stigma you're getting rejected and you're making yourself vulnerable to judgment and society's norms, right? The prejudice against that, you know, people have against gay people. Yep. So my definition of gay, and this is really hard for me to say this because, I mean, just because I could be just complete fucking idiot right here. My definition of gaze is when you want the same genitalia that you have, you're attracted to period. Yeah. That's like, that kind of sums it up in my opinion. And then when I look at it like that, I'm just like, who gives a fuck?

I'm just like, there's just nothing more for me to there. Before I got married, men are just, and I'm not a woman, so I don't know, but men are just driven to procreate. Like, that's just all we want to do. Like while we, everything we're doing, like running track, going to Olympics, wrestling, fighting, doing podcasts, it's all to avoid the other expression of all we want to do procreate. And so like, we just know that we're just, so yeah, it's, it's just like, it's just a, it's a, so that's your definition too? It's just like, that's it? Yeah, I think we're like kind of as a society driven to define things. Like it's just, we have logical brains and we want things to fit inside parameters.

So even like, you know, there's a whole community of people that, that don't, you know, identify as cisgender, heterosexual or whatever. Like gay is one part of that community. There are people who- What's cisgender? What's cisgender? Cisgender being like, you know male and female they identify and they exist in like you know male female straight cisgender and so so you like you like the other genitalia yeah opposing shapes

um i've never heard of that term good don't use it and i'm gonna forget as soon as now that i'm done i've had to ask like three times i don't want to know that yeah it's you know there's there's this whole movement with like with the pronouns and like you know i get it it's it's about creating safe space for people like we i feel a lot of pressure as a gay person to be an expert on gay things or queer whatever i'm not like i think that that people mix that up sometimes. I'm sure that I use the wrong pronouns and say the wrong words a lot, but you know, there's a, there's a whole community of people who, who just don't identify in, you know, a straight white normative way. And like gay is, is one part of that. And I've said it before, like, as far as

gay culture in, in the United States or the world, we're, like, we are the most digestible form of that, I think. Like, straight white women. It's easy to get down with what we're doing and, like, you know, not be too offended. You know, there's a whole spectrum of being gay. Like, being, you know, a gay man is a totally different, is usually received in a totally different way. Being a gay black man is received in a totally different way. Being a gay black man is received in a much different way. So there's a lot to it. There's a lot more to it than just gay or not gay.

What's interesting about men is, and this is just my speculation, but I'm pretty comfortable with this one. If you took all the women off the planet, 99% of the dudes would be gay within six months. Guaranteed. I promise you. They hate hearing that. They hate hearing that. No one wants to say it. They don't have a choice.

It would just, they just, yeah, they're, we're just savages. We're just disgust. Doids that we just, we just have, we just do this thing. We're just disgust. Doids that we just, we just have, we just do this thing.

We're just dudes. Yep. So that's the bizarre thing. It's a, it's a very thin veil. I mean, it's as thin veil is like shit. Three months. Sorry. Three months. Did I say six months, three months? It is such a paper thin veil. It is paper thin. And, um, and you could tell if you're listening to this and you're a dude and you, and you felt triggered or you felt the response, that's how thin the veil is. It's okay. You're still straight as shit. I'm not saying, you know, I'm just saying if they took all the women off three months later, you'd be in bed with me. Um, can you get married in Canadaada is there is like what's the rules

yeah canada's super progressive with that i think there's i don't know i don't know do you know what you're same-sex marriage but you're the worst you're like the worst gay and the worst canadian um i think and unflappable and unflappable. And unflappable. I love her stoic face. Yeah. Yeah, it's been legal for a long time. There are things that aren't really up for debate here anymore, and that's one of them. You know, guns or another. But that's a whole rabbit hole.

Alex, you... From what I see on your Instagram... Sorry, I want to talk about your body and I want to talk about something you just said about being embarrassed. Is that why you pursue being embarrassed to face your fear? Is that why you do certain behaviors like the naked photos or the beach photo where you're like this? Or are you just like, is it like public speech? Like I hate podcasts, but I do them to face my fear. I hate public speaking. I do it to face my fear.

And then you went up like when this podcast is over, I'm going to like celebrate like every podcast. I'm like, hi, is it kite? Cause I'm like, holy shit. I did one. Um, is that why you do those things? You're just like, fuck it. I'm going to, I'm going to take an ax swing at this demon.

Um, that's a good question. I think. Or like even the demo team, you got to be out there in front of everyone. Yeah. Those are all like kind of nerve wracking. Even now, like the number of times I post something and then like immediately delete it, even if it's like something like just totally like what normally would post. I'm like, ah, people don't care. I'm going to delete this or people think it's stupid. I'm going to delete it. Even if it's like something like just totally like what normally would post, I'm like, ah, people don't care. I'm going to delete this or people think it's stupid. I'm

going to delete this. The, like the new, I think the nude one, I can't remember the first one I did. I, I won that, um, that assault bike or we all got one for qualifying for the games. And they're like, it'd be great if you posted about it. So I was like, it'd be funny if I posted, I think funny enough, it was my mom who I said, it would be really funny if I posted myself nude on the bike. Cause it's like my very own assault bike. And she was like, you should totally do it. Obviously Brenda, your mom. Yeah, she is. And I think I just was like, it's Instagram. I'll just do it. And I got a lot of like, people loved it. It got a lot of really weird comments that I was like, um, okay. But then, you know, it's just the internet. Um, and then I think the

internet, like anything, Instagram is not like real. Like people are so surprised when they meet me and they're like, I was expecting somebody completely different based on knowing me just from Instagram. So it's almost like a protective shield, maybe. How, what do you mean by that? How is that a protective shield? To post a naked photo of you on an assault bike, tell me how that's a protective shield. Because you're the opposite. You're telling the world you're really vulnerable, but you're not. Like it's kind of like a misdirection. Like you're misleading them on purpose to protect yourself it's possible i've never really thought about it too much um yeah i don't i'm not sure there's just i think now i'm i'm a little bit more reluctant to do

that because i have a presence outside of just like Alex Parker, CrossFit athlete. Like I'm, I'm trying to be more of a professional in like nutrition and, and like a business owner. Um, so maybe I'm less likely to do stuff like that now. But, um, before it was like, I don't, I honestly, I have no idea what, that's a tough question. We'll circle back to it on the third podcast we do. There's a post you make in there about you basically say that the reasons why you eat a certain way and you measure your food and you do it because one of the reasons you give is aesthetically to have a good body. And I thought, well, no shit.

Finally, someone's going to say it. We want to have a good body. Like if I liked my body, I mean I like my body, but if I thought that other people like my body, my Instagram would be full of shirtless photos. And I like your body and obviously you like your body. And I think the majority of the world likes your body of a beautiful body. And so you post these pictures, but you're not, you're not even ashamed that that's the reason why you're doing it. You're like, yeah, I'm sharing. I eat like this so that I'll have a nice body to look at. Was that hard to come to terms with, to say that? Or is that just like, yeah, duh. Um, yeah, I remember that post. I think there's so much out there right now that it's like this body positivity thing.

And as much as I agree with that, like you see, you know, high level CrossFitters are just like anyone being like, you know, I love my body. Like you should too. You don't need to have a six pack or an eight pack to love your body. Um, and there's also a little bit of like shaming going on around like the nutrition and fitness industry. Like, you know, it's, it's not healthy to track your food. It's not healthy to exercise that much. And like, in certain cases it's not, but it's totally fine to like love your body and want to change it. Totally fine to like do something because you want to look a certain way and like you shouldn't be judged for it. Like, obviously I feel good, um, physically and I like the way

that I look. It's not like, you know, I'm beating my body up to look a certain way and I feel like shit. There's kind of a fine line, but I don't think, not like I'm beating my body up to look a certain way and I feel like shit. There's kind of a fine line, but I don't think. Yeah, I think one day I was just like, you know what? Like, this is why I track my food. I don't think it needs to be frowned upon to like the way that you look or to do something to look a certain way. I mean, everyone kind of does it to some degree or wish they could. And what's cool about the way you do it is it's accessible.

By that, I mean, I cannot look like Arnold Schwarzenegger unless I take more actions, right? Yeah. Unless I take steroids, unless I partake in some other stuff. But you're actually showing, hey, this is hard work and this is how I did it and this is how I measured it. work and this is how I did it. And this is how I measured it. And I actually, um, anyone, I feel like that the, at least in the United States, I don't know how it is in Canada. The society is so, so sick now from overeating. We basically, I mean, it's just crazy going out in public. The people, everyone, there are more than half the people I see are obese. If I go into a Starbucks, it's 95% of the people are obese. They're pouring toxins into their body.

I mean it's insanity. So I don't want to hear like I really have no tolerance for exercise is dangerous or it's too extreme to cut out all sugar. I don't have any tolerance for that. It's as dumb as when people say if you do CrossFit, you'll get bulky. Like fuck you, and I've said this a million times. You don't have the work ethic to get bulky. It's just dumb as when people say, if you do CrossFit, you'll get bulky. Like, fuck you. And I've said this a million times. You don't have the work ethic to get bulky. Like, it's just an excuse. It's just it is here.

I think you're a great role model. I think what you do is awesome, by the way. Yeah. The little bit that I've hung out with you when I interviewed you and Meredith and when – and during the demo team, when you were on the demo team, you had an incredible sense of humor. Like you did not seem like the kind of person who would offend very easy. Like it was fucking game on. And you have this weird way of like setting people free where like people are like, okay, shit, I can do anything. I can take off my pants and streak the field here.

Alex is game. Like Everything is a go. And that's a cool quality to have. Is that what you find? I'm going to make a presupposition here, but does Meredith ground you or does she set you more free? Do you feel more likely to streak the football game with Meredith around or less likely? Um, it's so, it's really funny. I have this, like, I feel like I have a theory. So I want to hear what the truth is, the way that you're describing me. And I am that way in certain circumstances, but I'm also like incredibly like serious and, um, like self-righteous and critical.

incredibly like serious and like self-righteous and critical. And I think Meredith probably gets more of that than like the free side of me. Oh, that's interesting. And, and, and that's so, and you explained that on your Instagram, but like when you were on the demo team, like, like you were serious, you always have that stoic face, but there's also this thing about you. That's kind of just like, yeah, yeah. I don't care. Let's do shots of tequila before we go out there and do what Dave says. Like, fuck it. Like anything goes. Hmm. Um, Meredith, does she ground you or do you feel more free around Alex? Oh, she grounds me. I, I need Alex in my life. I would, uh, you'll float away. Yeah. I'm ideas just floating around. I'm a pretty impulsive person. I like you come across people who are idea people and people who are

doers. I'm, I'm an idea person. I'm a creative and, um, I am really good at starting things, but not so good at finishing things. And so we, we work well together. I mean, we literally work together. So this is helpful for, for us professionally now. Um, you know, but I'm good at getting the ball rolling and then Alex cleans up my mess. Do you guys, how do you guys support each other? I have this personal pet peeve about around being anyone being around anyone and I kind of detest human beings who argue other human beings limitations so like I had this one movie partner and film partner for a while and I was like hey let's make a proposal to these people to make a film for him

for a half million dollars he goes we don't know how to make a film and he starts arguing all all the issues that we might have I'm like dude what and just, how are you guys like that? Is there one of you that I need to detest? Is there one of you that argues the limitations of the other or both you guys? Fuck the world's our oyster. Well, you have to remember that Alex is a lawyer, so she's trained to assess risk and kind of consider worst case. And that's all I'll say about that. I would argue that if you're a, I would argue if you're a background as a pharmaceutical, you might meet the same criteria. Uh,

yeah, I was in R and D. So I do a lot of like problem solving. I leave the, you cannot cure this by yourself. Take these pills. So about, wait,

hold on. So seven. I'm like, go ahead. Cause you're on a roll no no no go go go i'm be a good boy well i just you've like uh come so close to it so many times but i just feel like the last time that all four of us were i think in the same spot together well it's probably at the games actually many times since then but the first time we were all in the same spot together was at del mar you guys were already talking to each other in 2018 like pretty seriously time we were all in the same spot together was at Del Mar. You guys were already talking to each other in 2018? Like pretty seriously?

Yeah, we were dating. We were living in the same city. We were together. We had our other training partner, Jordan, who was in Del Mar also, also living in Calgary. I don't know if you remember, 2018 was that weird year where only five people from Western Canada went to regionals. Oh, Brian remembers everything, Meredithith yeah everything go on jordan jordan adcock is the

girl you have a really good memory yeah only for certain things and for whatever reason crossfit athletes stay up there yeah yeah so she it was like the three of us and we all trained together we carpooled we were at the same gym and we were all trying to get us one of those five spots. So it was a pretty, that was a tense year sort of in general. And then regionals was extra tense. Yeah, it was. And I think, I mean, seven documented that really well. I think, I think I talked about you guys in the interview. I knew you guys were a couple at the time, right? Because I talked about that and you guys had to face that like seconds after you knew, right? I was basically there with the camera in your face.

Hey, Alex, how do you feel? Right? That was a challenging year. What's up? It was a tough. Go ahead, Brian. So we got to go forward because there's something that I've just been dying to actually ask the two of you for like three years now because ultimately end up meredith you end up going to the games that year or competing at the games that year and alex did not

but i heard this story that um you might have been testing out some other workouts for meredith that year did you did you actually do the marathon row like the night before everyone else did it? Yeah. Yeah. But that was, that was, she actually got really mad about that. So they announced it. We were at the athlete dinner and Dave announced it. I thought everybody thought he was joking. He wasn't. And I just texted Alex like marathon row. And she said, she texted me back. She's like, I'm going to do it tomorrow. Don't tell anybody. And of course, I told everybody that she was going to do it. And so then I'm doing... She gets started or whatever. And we go do bike fitting or whatever the hell we were doing that day. And she has an audience of people who are just down there putting it

on social media, watching her do it. And she was pissed off because it meant that she couldn't quit. It meant that she had to see it. She can just do a half marathon. It's gotta be the whole thing. Where did you do that? Where was that? Um, so when I went to the games with Meredith, I was like her coach, which I'm like, I don't know how to coach anybody, but I was like her person. And, uh, the first like few days we were there, it was literally like nothing to do because Meredith was doing all the pre-game stuff like bike fitting and getting her board or paddleboard, whatever she needed.

And they had an athlete at the athlete hotel. They had in one of the conference rooms or ballrooms, whatever it was, they had a few rowers, a platform for lifting and stuff, some dumbbells and boxes. So I just like went down there. No one was there when I started. It was just me. And I was like, I'll just do that. I'll just do it. I think I had like some orange juice with me. I was like, okay, I'll just... And then her headphones died. In the meantime? Yeah.

Oh God. In the meantime, everyone else who's doing it the next night is bringing out like a full basket with supplies. Yeah. How was your time? Someone had told me. I think I was like three. Meredith beat me by like a minute or something. So I was like 316. I was cruising. Well, it always helps to go second. The first, the last, the first like 32 kilometers, I was fine. The last 10 kilometers, I was not okay. Like I got up every like two kilometers and it was just brutal, but I had to finish because Meredith had told all these people. So, but I'm glad I did. It was a good challenge.

My favorite post out of the two, out of both your Instagram accounts is on Alex's account. And it's a post where I think it's on your account. And it's a post where you just finished a workout. And Meredith walks up to you and says, How much did I beat you by? And I thought that was ballsy as shit that you posted that because in that half a second before the clip ends, your face says a lot. That is intense what your face reveals. What's the story behind that Meredith? Was that planned in advance? Like what, what were you thinking? Were you like, Oh, I need some content. I'll fuck with Alex and get a good poster. I think that was a, we were doing the

muscle up by Athlon from the whatever year they did that at the games. and we, we did it inside a gym. We did it on the like air runners and, um, I had a game plan and then, and like, I'm, it's just the way that we are about it. Like as athletes, I'm kind of more of a gymnast. I'm good at muscle ups. I like running, like that's kind of a wheelhouse workout. And then Alex is not as good as at Ups, but she's gotten quite a bit better. And so I was filming it for our coach to watch. And yeah, I finished it. And she finished maybe a little bit less than a minute behind me, which was a pretty good time.

And I thought I was being funny and cute and went over there and made a joke. And she did not find that to be very funny, but ended up at the end of the day being some really, really good content. People can laugh at it. Great content.lex took one for the team yeah i mean i i see you guys go ahead brian no i was gonna say i mean i don't think people realize sometimes when they see crossfit athletes especially the girls because a lot of them are very good looking and if you don't necessarily

see them with their shirts off you wouldn't. But when they get on the competition floor, like you guys are such fierce competitors that it's like you can be this pretty beautiful woman in your life. But when you go on that floor, like it doesn't matter. You guys are cutthroat. You have to be to be that good at something as you guys were. But I noticed that this year, if I'm not mistaken, one of you chose to do the RX version of the Open and one of you chose to do the equipment free. Was this to avoid these types of competitive conflicts?

It definitely is. It's a convenient thing to do. I did equipment free. I'm not really in shape for a competition and I'm dealing with some hip stuff. Plus, we're super busy with the business and I'm just not quite as good at managing my time or my training. So I decided to kind of chill out this year. Um, it doesn't look like in-person events are happening in Canada anyways. And I just, I don't thrive in online format. So I was like, you know, I'll just, I'll, I'll be supportive and have some fun and see what things look like next year. Um, but yeah, that's, it's certainly been a little easier for us than, uh, in previous years. Well, but those equipment for workouts were not easy though.

No, not at all. And they weren't supposed to be, but you get into it and you kind of like, you know, you write it off. Like it's not our acts, it's equipment free. And then you get five minutes into it and you're like, fucked up. And you you're like but how i took a break on the i had to break the lateral jumps yes how did you do alex how did you do alex well enough i think i was like 200 me and when you say well enough you mean to go to this the quarterfinals yeah like i just um just did it like on sunday at the end of my training block and just tried to get a decent score so that I could move on to the next stage, but also train. Train is normal.

Are you pursuing to go to the games? I don't know. The thing about the CrossFit is I've never done CrossFit to get to the games. I think one year I had the goal of getting to the games. I think one year I had the goal of getting to the games. That was the year I took off, but it's always like, just train as hard as I can. Um, I really, really, really love working out and training. Um, and that keeps me in good enough shape usually to advance to the next level. And most years get very close to the games. So this year, um, there's a lot of unknown just with COVID and like,

I don't tend to do particularly well in online competitions. So I guess the goal isn't necessarily to get to the games, but first to get to quarter or sorry, semifinals, and then just do my best. Like if I'm, if I go or compete in my, if I'm able to compete in one of those events, I'll just try to get top five, but training, it's kind of falling a little bit lower on the list of priorities, especially with Meredith, not as competitive. Meredith, is she telling the truth or is she mitigating her stress level? Does she tell herself that story to mitigate her stress levels? That's what i thought too that's like alex she's an alien and she'll always be an alien and like she's just one of those people i mean in 2018 when she came seventh at regionals which is a phenomenal finish

in that west region because it's so competitive like that was when she and she won't brag about herself so i'll brag about her but that was when she was working like that was first year at a law firm which is an incredibly demanding schedule especially especially when you're working for a big-time corporate firm like she was. So the fact that... I mean, that's just a testament to what she's able to do if she decides to do it. So it's more like deciding that you want to do it. It is a little bit harder to invest in this year, I think, because of the changes to the format and some of the unknowns. But yeah, she's being modest. Do you guys ever suspect any of the athletes for doing drugs, performance-enhancing drugs, things that would be illegal, according to the CrossFit rulebook?

I'm sure it's there. I think anytime you monetize a sport, it's going to be there. The extent that it took it, like the extent that it exists is sort of an unknown to me. It's I don't like to assess or make assumptions about anybody. It's like, you know, when people get kit pop for whatever and they say it's in their supplements, like, does that happen? Probably.

Or like, is it possible that they're taking things and they just didn't time it right? Also probably. So I don't think it exists at like at the high level as much as it exists probably in those fringe athletes who were just trying to like like break i always said if you tested the if you went to regionals and you tested people who were coming like 30th if you tested that block you'd probably see a lot of you'd probably see a lot more of it than you would expect. Yeah, I've heard that too. I've heard that too. What do you think, Alex?

What do you think about that? Do you suspect it's more prevalent than you, do you think a lot of people do it or do you think at the top or do you think no? Yeah, I think early on in my CrossFit career, I was like, how can people say that? Like people are just, they're hard workers. Like I used to get accused of taking whatever steroids or PDs. I'm like, I w I wouldn't even know where to begin with that. Um, but like, again, it's like people underestimate what hard, where hard work can get you and like eating healthy or whatever, training hard. Um, but then, you know, you start seeing people getting popped like Ricky Gerard. And I mean, there's a lot of examples out there, maybe not at the very top, but I'm, I'm, I'm sure it's, it's everywhere. I mean, if it, if it, if it wasn't, then they wouldn't be doing drug testing.

It's, it's a, it's a trip when someone pops because like part of me is like i really don't care but the thing i do care about is not them like okay fine you do drugs or you don't do drugs but it's the other people around them who didn't do them so like so matt beat him and so then people could say well if this horse beat that horse then that horse must be on and that's horse must be on. And that's the part that sucks, right? That's the part that it kind of taints the whole game. I almost wish, I don't know how it works, how it would ever work in civilization, but I hate any laws that we have or rules that we have that force people to lie.

I just think that we put human beings in so many situations where they're forced to lie, and it's like, it's not cool. No one's happy to lie. No one wants to lie. You know what I mean? I'm sure Ricky would much rather have had it or anyone would much rather have it just not to lie. Yeah. Yeah. I'm taking these. Yeah. Yeah. Watch me go. Yeah. Watch me go. Maybe you get, you lose half your money or you can't go on the podium. Yeah. Maybe you lose half your money or you can't go on the podium.

Yeah. Who has the nicest body in the entire world that you've ever seen? That's such a hard question. Just throw a name out there that you might think. Like male or female? Just anybody. Ah, don't cheat, Meredith. Don't start asking crazy questions.

Zac Efron has a really nice body. I think he has a very nice body too. It's like very proportional and he's really good looking and he's always tan. Yeah. He was in that Baywatch movie, right? I'm just, I'm trying to think like,

why do I know what Zac Efron looks like without a shirt on? And like the neighbors movie. Yeah. Yeah. He's got, do you think that most, most women would say, God, it's weird. So the reason why I asked the question is because like, I always stripped, like, I always think that the nicest bodies in the world, the most, if I think that the five nicest bodies I've ever seen in the world, I would think that they're all men, but I really, really like women. So, but it's just weird. Right. But look at you guys. Also doing this. Brian, who do you think has the nicest body in the world, Brian?

It's a, you know, as we were talking about that, I was, I did like Anna Nicole Smith as a young boy, as a young boy, I really liked Anna Nicole Smith, a young boy. As a young boy, I really liked Anna Nicole Smith. But sorry, go ahead, Brian. Actually, I've had conversations like this with a couple of people before. And a lot of times, when it comes to women's stuff, I really love a certain woman's arms. But the rest of her isn't doing it necessarily for me if you're talking about the best in the world. And so it's like, I need to piece it together.

But then again, I have to go with you guys and say like there are some guys that I just say like, yeah, you know, when Brad Pitt looks at his best, when Zac Efron looks at his best, like it's – I don't know anyone that's going to say like, no, I'm not attracted to that. Yeah. That one girl who – she rides around on the bicycle naked in that video. What's the video? It's all these naked girls. That was Alex Parker. What is that song? It's Alan Thicke's son.

He did this video where there were all these naked girls riding around on bicycles. Oh, Robin Thicke. That song. Yeah. Those girls had nice bodies. But yeah, so I was just curious. That song. Yeah. Those girls had those girls had nice bodies. I was just curious. That makes me happy. That makes me happy that you guys picked Zac Efron. I don't know why. He deserves it.

I did. Who is the adult in your relationship? Are you guys both adults? Are neither of you adults? Who would sign the mortgage papers and deal with the bank loans and like who does that like shit it's weird i i probably take care of more of the logistics but meredith gets the ball rolling like buying a house like i wouldn't have but she's like you know it'll be okay we'll do Um, or like spending any amounts of money. I'm like, no, but like, once it's done, I, I figure out the finances or whatever, but yeah, I guess I'd make the decisions

on like, what are we spending our money on? What neighborhood do we want to live in? What is wrong with the truck? Like I do that kind of thing. Alex does, she takes care of the finances and the paying bills on time, things like that. Making sure we have food. Yeah. That's interesting. That's my wife and I too. I choose the neighborhood. I choose the house. And then when it comes to all the adult, what I call the adult shit, like the house is in her name and like she signed the paperwork and she's on the phone with like title companies and I'm

just like hiding in the corner. Oh God, I hope she doesn't ask me to do anything. Do you guys own a house? We do. We bought a house back in December. Actually, we were renting and like more. Thank you. Yeah. It's, you know, the housing market is really crazy right now.

Everywhere. It was starting to get sort of wild here and it's, it's, uh, I don't know what the average house time on the market is. It's quite short now. Um, but we were, we were in more downtown Calgary, um, in a condo and they basically what happened was this, they were going to tear down this old crappy building behind us and start building a new condo, which we found out. And we worked from home and just kind of decided we didn't want to deal with that noise for the summer. And so we started thinking, well, maybe we should just buy a house. And we were in a good financial place to do that. And so we bought one on the west side of the city, which is like literally there's a traffic

circle that goes out of our neighborhood and you take the first exit to Banff. And that's like, it's been really convenient for us because we ski and stuff. So, and you liked your house? Oh, we love it. So one of the reasons why we picked this house is because the basement, like most of the houses here have basements and they have variable, like sometimes the ceilings are quite low, eight feet. Sometimes they're quite high. This basement had a particularly high ceiling and it was unfinished. So we outfitted.

We drywalled, dropped electrical, and turned it into a CrossFit gym. I saw you even got rings. Yeah. Yeah, I can use the rings. Alex can't. Her arms are too long. I have rings in the garage. If she did muscle-ups like seven, she could use the rings. I did a muscle-up and I was like, my face, Meredith videoed it, and my face, I'm so scared because I think I'm going to hit my head.

It was, yeah, it's not worth it down there. Did you hit your head? When I press up, I hit my head, but I just, I do it very slowly. I do it very slowly. Are both your parents, how do your parents react to the fact that you are gay, that you're not going to have a husband? I ask because I have kids, like before I had kids, you know, you would hear parents say all I care about is that my kids are happy. And now that I have kids, like I fully get that. And the only thing that would stress me out about my kids being gay would be the hardships that might come with that. And just in terms of public pressure, not even from the outside world,

but the stuff that they would have in their head. Like I wouldn't want them to think of themselves as gay any more than I think of myself as straight, which don't. Right. So like, I would just, I just want them to be just free. So like, I don't care what mate they find. I want them to find a mate who like makes them free. And like, I like, is that how your parents are? I mean, my kids are just babies now, but I really, it really does seem like that. Like all I want them to do is be happy, not happy in terms of not having adversity and suffering.

Like they need to have that to be happy. Not happy in terms of not having adversity and suffering. They need to have that to be strong. Are your parents ecstatic for you that you found your love? It's funny that you say that. The day that I came out to my mom, she basically said, I don't care. I just worry. If anything, I worry about what you might face in this world. Like, I don't want you to live an easy, like easy life. I don't want you to have to go through stuff that, you know, a straight person doesn't

have to go through. Um, thankfully we, we live in a, and like, she, I think she's, she loves Meredith. Like, I think she's very happy that like I found someone. I think for a long time she was worried because like I was very closed off to people. And part of it I think was because I was gay and I was trying to date men. But we live in a place that's, you know, you don't really experience any sort of discrimination, like outward discrimination. I still, it's in the back of my head for sure. Like even when we moved into this neighborhood, I worry like, well, what did the neighbors think? Um, you know, are they talking about

us behind closed doors? Like, oh yeah, the neighbors are, you know, two girls, um, stuff like that. It doesn't impact my life greatly, but it's definitely in the back of my head. stuff like that. It doesn't impact my life greatly, but it's definitely in the back of my head. I mean, people are, people are seeing you the same way they see people like, you know, like when you see someone who doesn't have an arm and you take a double take, cause you just, you're not, you've seen a human being without an arm. And so when you do see two girls walking down the street, holding hands, or you do see two guys walking down the street going holding hands you you see it or like i never ever used to see people by color but now that we're in this fucking crazy crazy fucking be nice evie now now i know like i'll be at the beach and i'll see someone who's black and i'll be like oh there's a black person when i never ever like i never did

that so when when the when the society is tart, there's a black person when I never, ever, like I never did that. So when, when the, when the society is tart, when there's a lot of chatter, you know what I mean? Around something. Or like, if you see someone who's, um, I don't know what the correct term is a little person. Like you look, I love my kids. Cause they'll just walk over to a guy without a leg and they'll be like, yo, what happened? Where's your leg? You know what I mean? And that's the way it should be. But, um, but I, I would say that people know, like your neighbors are definitely saying whether they're, they give a shit or not. They're like, Oh, they're a lesbian couple. You know what I mean?

They just, it's not, they also say you have a cat. Yeah. You know what I mean? Hey, don't run over the cat. They have a cat or Hey, they're really noisy. They drop weights. I mean, they say other shit about you too. Yeah. Um, you know, they say your mom's have a cat or, Hey, they're really noisy. They drop weights. I mean, they say other shit about you too. Yeah. Um,

you know, they say your mom's crazy. I mean, what, you know, the other day we were at the dinner table with my parents and I'm like, you know, like I worry about this, like with, you know, us being gay and like our neighbor, like we met the neighbors, like they're for sure like talking. My mom's like, you know, people just don't care anymore. I'm like, no, they're for sure. Like she went over to her husband and was like, they're gay. It was either like they're gay or where are their parents? Like, that's just.

Yeah. Yeah. It's. And also it goes back also to the genital whose genitalia you like on some level. They're the mating thing is always happening on some level, the mating thing is always happening. On some level. The fucking Pope is doing it. The Dalai Lama is doing it. Everyone is managing their thoughts, desire to look for mates.

And so just like you had to find out if Alex was gay, there's also that going on at a very deep subconscious level, I believe. I don't think anyone escapes that until the day they die. According to my dad, it gets worse as you get older. Although I'm with kids. Are you guys going to have kids? Yeah, we've talked about it. It's so complicated. For same-sex couples, it just has to be a decision. There's planning. You can't just like, oops, have a kid. There are a lot of reasons why I like that. It's nice. There are no surprises.

But it's, you know, it means when the time comes. You kind of can. You kind of can. You kind of could. But, you know, there's. My midwife, my wife, my midwife does that. And I think that she gets sperm and delivers it to women. Yeah, that's one way to do it.

We have some friends. I mean, we know lots of gay people. They reach out to us. And I did hear a story about a turkey baster in the back of a truck. Honestly, that is not surprising because it is expensive. It's like 10 grand yeah like per attempt i mean like it's it's it's insane like ivf is just quite expensive so do you want to sleep with that disgusting man and we can save ten thousand dollars

or you want to waste ten thousand dollars yeah and then when it doesn't take you do it all over again they did yeah my wife doesn't have a wedding ring. Wait, wait. No, no. Honey, honey. No fucking way. Yeah. $10,000 or $20,000 for a ring or whatever people.

We didn't even have a marriage. We got married in a courthouse. We have a fucking nice house and two cars and lots of money. Like, I'd rather save. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Can I tell you guys a quick story and get your opinion on it?

So the first girl that I ever dated and I was really in love with her and I thought that I would end up marrying her. We were in high school. I was 18. She was 16 at the time. We'd already been dating for a couple of years and I thought that she was gay. And so I told her that she hates, she got really mad at me about that. And the two years went by and then she finally admitted it to me two years later. And she, I mean, she was struggling with that a lot. Um, and what I said to her, and this is what I kind

of want to know your opinion. If you think that this was a sensitive or an insensitive response by me, what I said to her was, cause I knew that a major fear of hers and not wanting to admit that was her family's reaction because they're very Roman Catholic. And she was especially nervous about upsetting her grandparents. So I told her, I said, that's not really too much of a concern to me. I like being around you. You're my best friend. We have a great time together. When I have a struggle, I like being able to have you there to bounce ideas off of and we laugh together and all these good things. And I would still spend my life with you, even if you were never wanting to sleep with me unless it was maybe to have kids and if you were having your relationship with your girls on the side. That's the story. She told you that or you told her that?

I said that to her oh i said i would still want to be with you even if you were more only interested in women sexually because you're my best friend and i love hanging out with you yeah i don't think that's insensitive no i think that's kind of what i would if i put myself in that position that would be a nice thing to hear you were in that position weren't you mer yeah he didn't say that though that's not what I got are you still friends with him uh I mean we're we're we're cordial I don't see him or talk to him that often because he's back in North Carolina but it's you didn't end poorly it was about as amicable as that can can, I think. How long after your divorce before you met Alex? Well, I actually met Alex before.

The summer that we met was right before it happened. But it wasn't like, I wasn't pursuing, I wasn't trying to date anybody. It just so happened that I, and I wasn't introducing myself to Alex because I was like, I i'm gonna hit on this girl i just i wanted to introduce myself to alex sure she doesn't believe when i don't know what your earliest memories are but um i i knew for some reason in kindergarten that i really really liked my kindergarten teacher i obviously hadn't been sexualized at all i didn't know why but i really wanted to impress her. I wanted to be close to her. I wanted her to touch me. Like I wanted my parents to invite her over for dinner. They never did, but I really liked her. And, and then, you know, I liked, um, chasing girls and getting their phone

numbers in third grade and stuff. And, but I still didn't know anything. I mean, I didn't know anything. I didn't, I didn't lose my virginity till I was 18. I didn't know anything forever. I just kind of was, I had a girlfriend when I was 16 and we were together for two years before we had sex. Like I just didn't, I just didn't know what I didn't know. Um, is it like that for you also, like in kindergarten or however old girls are when they start getting feelings? Are you like, oh yeah, I want Mrs. Allen to come over to my house and give me a bath too but you don't know why um yeah i i can't remember anything like specific but i just generally have this general like memory of always being more concerned with girls and women and like not from a i want to

hang out with them i want to touch them them. I want to do anything. Just like, just generally more interested and concerned with females. And that's, I remember that from a very young age. And I just, maybe I didn't know what that meant or how to define it. Probably like you didn't either. It's just, it's, it's the way that it was. And then, you know, you grow up and you have all the pressure of, you know, had a sexual. Yeah, that must be, that must be crazy. So you have this inside desire to be intimate, physically intimate with females, but the

whole, but you can't see it being reflected on the outside world. Yeah. Cause you never see it. Yeah. That's bizarre. Yeah. That's bizarre. I grew up in the South.

And so you really don't see it down there. Um, and it's not like my family was particularly conservative. They aren't, they're very democratic actually. It's just, you, you want to look around in, in the world and see people reflected at you who are like you. And I think there's, there's a need. Everybody has that need. You want to see people who, who are like you. And when you don't see that, you end up questioning your reality, especially when you can't put a name to what your reality is. And so that was, that's what growing up in the nineties was, even though, you know, that was kind of at the start of where, where gay culture was starting to be popularized in media and, um, and things like that. It just, it wasn't enough.

I didn't see it enough. I mean, like, I don't think Ellen DeGeneres came out on TV until like in the early two thousands. Not that I was watching Ellen DeGeneres when I was eight, but that just kind of tells you what the nineties were like. And so I think there was a lot. How old are you? I'm 32. How old are you, Alex? 31. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry, Meredith. A lot of confusion. Yeah. No, I just it when you can't put it you don't know what it is that you're feeling or why or or you know if it's normal if it's not normal you're like maybe everybody just kind of hates boys and they deal with it like they just date them anyways like um you know it wasn't until high school I started to see

wait that's a great line. Maybe everyone needs... Hey, don't rule that out. Don't rule that out. Don't rule that out. Go on. Yeah. Sorry. You know, for me, my parents divorced when I was 11. And so, you know, I just had a lot of turbulence in my teenage years.

And I think a big part of me wanted and craved a lot of stability. So the instability that I didn't have when I was a teenager, I sought to create that for myself. And it's why I pursued academics the way I did. And I got the degree that I did and I networked and I got the job that I did because I was just trying to build this white picket fence life for myself because it felt safe, even if it felt wrong. Like that's kind of the, everybody always asks, well, why did you get married? I got married because it felt like the safe thing to do at the time. And that overruled what I, what I knew in my heart to be true. And it's like, you know, I would have these crazy, just out of like out of body experiences

where I would, I would see myself living this life that wasn't mine. Like that, that can't be me. That can't be me living this life. Like that's not me. And that didn't stop until like, until I got a divorce until I moved here really. Um, and now that doesn't happen so much. So, or at all. Yeah, at all. It never happens. You, I have this, I have this firm belief that we're all just mirrors here, that we are all just reflecting each other, and that there is a – it's just – it's more than a belief. I see it, but I don't want to be so dogmatic or arrogant. But you just said something to put – when I run that paradigm through my head and I think about being gay, it's fucking crazy. Because like no one would smoke like, you know, cigarettes are contagious. Your friends start smoking, then your other friends start smoking, and then they all start smoking.

Eating donuts is contagious. Being fat is contagious. People don't realize it, but eating like shit is contagious. We all see it and we're all mirroring each other and it's all external bullshit. But just imagine for a second, people, that you have something inside of you that's real, but you can't find it in the world. I'm not talking about an idea. I'm not talking about an idea.

There's people, there's two guys walking down the street. One guy's black, one guy's white. They're walking towards each other. The white guy, the white guy crosses the street and the black guy has an idea. He crossed the street because he was racist. That's an idea. And when you have an idea like that, you're and you believe it, you're conflating your idea with reality. And now you're lying to yourself. And that's how, unfortunately, a lot of racist beliefs happen. But we're not talking about that. We're talking about something that's actually real inside of you. Your desire. It's coming from inside of you. Your desire to be with other women. But you can't find it in your world. It's, um, it's, uh, who I gave myself goosebumps. It's crazy.

It's really, uh, it's, it's really, it's really amazing. It's gotta be, I have to imagine it's gotta be one of the weirdest things ever. You know, something is real, but you can't see it. And well, now you have Alex, you can see it every day. I get to see it every day. It was weird to think back. Like I have vivid memories of this life. It was a good life. I had a lot of security. I had a lot of financial security. I remember exactly what that was.

But when I think back to it, it almost appears in my mind like a movie. It's so abstract to me now. Do you forgive yourself for it? Sorry? Do you forgive yourself for it? Sorry? I'm making the presupposition. Do you forgive yourself for it? I'm making the presupposition that... Do you ever feel like, oh, shh.

Do you ever feel like you abandoned yourself or do you beat yourself up? Like, God damn it. Or are you like, no, no, I'm glad I took that journey. Yeah. I don't think I would be where I am now if I didn't. There's little butterfly effects in life. Like what I, what I have have made enough money to take a year and a half off to play CrossFit and meet Alex, probably not. So it's, it's, I don't regret any part of it because it got me to where I'm, where I am now. Like the most regretful part of it is that I

hurt someone who I actually did generally like genuinely care about. And that was my husband. It's, it's difficult to know that you've, you've really greatly impacted someone's life and potentially a negative way. Even if it's in the end, what's right for both of you. Like it's,

that's the thing that to this day just doesn't, I still struggle with that when I think about it. But you didn't get fat. You didn't turn him on to donuts. You didn't bring heroin into the household. You didn't fucking bring home a dog that bit someone and you guys lost your house. You didn't force him into orgies. You didn't introduce him to intravenous drug use.

Those are all external. This thing came from inside you. Look at me. I'm yelling at you. This thing came in from inside of you. You don't have a fucking choice. Like if you would have started bringing donuts home, I'd be like, yo, Meredith, you're a bitch. But like, and God, I'm fat.

But like you didn't, right? Yeah. Like you didn't have a choice. Yeah. And I think at the end of the day, that's kind of, I know that he knows that and I know that. And that's how we both sleep at night. I imagine. I know that he knows that and I know that and that's how we both sleep at night, I imagine.

If I slept with a, let's say I had sex with a guy, I would never ever be able to tell, I don't think, I mean, I don't know, but I don't think I'd ever be able to tell the world about it. I couldn't come on the podcast and be like, yeah, I was sucking this guy's dick and I fucked this guy. I could never do that. I would be, I just couldn't do that. I would, I would be, um, I just couldn't do it. I couldn't handle the, the, I don't know why I couldn't do it. The judgment, I guess the, yeah, I just, I couldn't handle it.

But I had an experience of, I think that some gay guys are just like that too. And there's others that love to talk about it. I had a firsthand experience with that actually. Go ahead. Sorry. When I was 18, I was in,

uh, I was in rehab and then there were these two gay guys. And the one guy was like telling his story and he was being very, very descriptive of his sexual encounters. And this other gay guy that was in the room was like severely offended by it. And it's like, and like stood up in the middle of this guy's testimony. And I was like was like i'm i can't believe you're talking about that in front of all these people that's completely inappropriate and he stormed out of the room so like i think that even amongst gay people they probably is a difference of some people like talking about

that stuff and some people might not well my point is is that she what that meredith sorry i'm pointing to you like this because you're over here. My point is, is that Meredith slept with a guy and she could admit it. That was my point. Like she slept with the other team and she could admit it. And so it's just, it's just, it's like, it's, it's, it's fascinating. It's, there's, I don't want to say it's a hypocrisy, but it's probably a hypocrisy. It feels like it sometimes. Yeah. Yeah. It's, um, yeah. Does it ever, does it ever become, um, does it ever become to where you're not like, Oh, the gate neighbors are gay.

Like, does that ever, does that ever happen? I mean, I don't think in my lifetime, but yeah, I don't know how that happens because it's like, you know, being gay, it's something that's so like inherent and ingrained. Like, it's just, you are gay in the same way that you have brown hair, but you don't have to repeatedly announce to everyone that you have brown hair versus like, you know, when you're gay. And we we've talked about this with people in our community and on our podcast, you never stop coming out. And what I mean by that is simple scenarios. Like when you, when you check into a hotel and, and this has happened to us a number of occasions. So, you know, you check into a hotel and the receptionist asks, would you like two Queens? And then you have to tell the receptionist, no, a king bed will be fine. And so now you've just come out to the receptionist.

Or I'll be standing oh right when she checks in and meredith will like check in for her king bed room and then she's like next like as it like because i'm not with meredith as if oh i'm like we all you're like as if i'm in line and once again it all comes down to whose genitalia you want to hold in your hands. It's so fucking amazing. I love it. I wish we could just come to terms with that. I wish they could ask you. I wish they could just be that transparent.

Like we use the term sister. What's your sister's name, Meredith? Megan. Megan. She's the chick that came out of your mom's vagina after you. Yeah. Right? She's your younger sister.

I mean, we have all these words to signify all of these things, but we forget like what they really mean. Yeah. That's my dad. Oh, that's the guy that fucked your mom. You know what I mean, we have all these words to signify all of these things, but we forget like what they really mean. Yeah. That's my dad. Oh, that's the guy that fucked your mom. You know what I mean? It's like that made you, you know, it's like they are just signifiers for these for these concepts. Yeah, it's great.

Yeah. God, we've never had a situation like like one of the ones that you've described where it was like a guy that was having this encounter with. And once he realized what was going on, he looked at you guys like, Oh, that's hot or something like that. Um, I'm sure I'm usually so like, um, I get occasionally quite offended by it. Just the way people ask, like we were at the doctor's office the other day and I was with Alex and you know, the, the, the doctor came up and he asked me if I was family. And I just said, yes. And then instead of just leaving it at that, he was like, well, but who are you? And I had to be like, well, I'm her partner. Cause clearly I'm not her sister.

So it's like, it's, it's annoying in those instances. Like you should be able to infer who I am based on like our age. And you know, it's, it's a bit obnoxious when the delivery is off, but maybe he was turned on. He looked turned on. I don't know. You know, you know what though? In his defense, I've had that too. Oh yeah.

I've had that too. Where I go, I'm in the doctor's office with my wife and they're like, who are you? And I go, I'm with her and they go, yeah, but who are you? And I'm like her husband. Like for sometimes they need to hear it. How about this? I'm at the fucking coffee shop with my kids sitting with my mom and my beard was big and this beautiful man and beautiful woman and their two kids walk up and my three little kids are there and they go, oh, how sweet. The grandparents

are out with their grandkids. And my mom goes, oh, isn't that funny? They think we're the grandparents. I'm like, no, it's that funny they think we're the grandparents i'm like no it's gross they think we're fucking you know like that's hilarious she took it like we're both the grandparents i immediately went to the to the filth the less obvious how is um how so how how is jealousy between the two of you? How protective over you are of the friendships? I have male friends that I'm very, very intimate with emotionally and intellectually. And there's no jealousy between that, between my wife and I. Do you – but if I did get that close to a woman i think she she would um there would be some there would be some gravel you know there'd be some defensiveness on my

part if she said anything do you guys have any of that like like do you guys is it the opposite with you like you can have male friends that you're um intimate with emotionally intellectually but not girl female friends because then there's this subtle threat to them moving in? Um, I think it depends. One of Alex's like best friends is a guy and there's, and I'm friends with him too, but you know, there's no real jealousy there when they're talking or like the only time I've really felt a lot of jealousy over friendships that Alex has had is when she, a couple of years ago, she played on the,, she played on the slow pitch team, softball team. And no surprise, they're all lesbians. And it was very beer league. So these girls are... There are a

lot of... Up here, you have ex-hockey players, ex-rugby players. They're athletic, but they drink beer. And it's very casual. And then there's Alex, who looks like she's been carved out of marble. And so naturally, like she's just the queen of the gaze on this slow pitch team. And there was this sort of obsessive level of Alex worship going on. And, you know, that sounds fun, Alex. I want to be, I'm actually rejoining that team this summer, but you know, it was like, I was kind of early after I moved here and it's hard when the person that you're dating, like is just getting openly hit on sometimes right in front of you. And it's like, yeah, it, the feelings can be a little hard to manage. Um, but I don't, we have a number of

gay friends, even like in Calgary and it's a lot of them are coupled up. So it's like the, the, the risk is low. And, um, I don't know. How do you feel? Yeah. I don't think we've really run into that problem. Otherwise, like with. Except for the softball team worship. Yeah.

Except for that, I guess it's like, oh man, it's kind of funny, but also like a little annoying sometimes. And also Alex is really good at all sports. Like I'm not exaggerating. Like she's just very very athletic so not only does she look amazing she's the most athletic person out there like it's just it's like

double whammy how do your parents get along your parents that both your parents together how do your parents get along good mine um so my my mom passed away in 2015 but my dad is remarried and he and his um wife have been up here once for my like a birthday party a couple years ago um they get along well my dad's super easygoing like he can get along with anybody and talk to anybody so it's i would say our families are actually quite different though like um my family's not they're not lawyers they're very my dad has got pretty severe adhd so he's just kind of a flighty person. He's probably where I get it from.

But I don't know. I love them. So both of you have had some, some pretty intense early loss. You lost your mom and Alex lost her sister. Yep. Did you lose your sister, Alex? Yep. Is that, is that, do you guys talk, have you guys spent a lot of time talking about that?

Together? Yeah, a little. Yeah. Is that, is that, do you guys talk, have you guys spent a lot of time talking about that together? Yeah, a little. Meredith doesn't talk that much about it. I wouldn't say I do either. If anything, it's like, my mom talks a lot about losing my sister with us around. So I think Meredith gets a lot of the, that from her. And then like, there's the odd time it will come up with us but all right like how many years ago sorry uh it was about no no go ahead it was about 10 years ago so i i worry a lot like i just have a lot of like i and i worry i worry about the people i love like losing them now so sometimes if I'm upset with Meredith wanting to go do something,

I'm like, well, you don't understand. It's because I'm worried about you or whatever. But I think besides that, it's, yeah. I think having that connection, both having been through that similar experience helps, but we don't talk about it a ton. When you say worried, like she'll, she'll fly somewhere in the plane or crash and you'll lose her. Yeah. Or like, um, driving is, is, uh, like getting, getting sick,

things like that. But yeah, I, I, I worry more than I should. I'm like, I don't know how I'm going to ever have kids. Does that like, is it like 10 times worse? I'm going to be the worst, most protective parent. I spend 90% of my time parenting like this because every time you talk, you screw something up. We have no business talking to our kids. We just, it's, and, and how did your mom pass Meredith? Um, she, she died, uh, well, she died of a number of things. She was, uh, not the healthiest person. She sort of, she was an alcoholic. She developed that later in life. And, um, so she died of acute liver failure and, um, she had liver cancer, but I don't think that's actually what killed her. Um, so that was again, one of the issues that I dealt with when I was a teenager,

but, um, yeah, it's just, you get to a point when you become so unhealthy that there's just, you can't come back from it. And she got there. And like, if you've ever dealt with someone who, who has substance abuse problems, you realize like like there's really only so much that you can do to help that person. And my sister and I both had kind of, you know, reached our limit and for what we could do for her. And my grandparents had passed away. So she didn't really have a support system outside of us. And she got mixed up with some people who weren't particularly helpful or healthy either.

So that was 2015. I actually didn't see her for almost two years before she died. And I remember that was, so you weren't living in the same house watching your mom drink herself to death. No, no, we were, I was in Raleigh. So I went to university about two, uh, two hours away from my hometown and my sister went the other direction. She went West to the mountains. And so we, um, we were both away from her for a while. And then when I stayed in Raleigh and worked there and my sister moved back home, just, she, she happened to get a job in our hometown. Um, so she dealt with her on a more regular basis than I did. Um, but even still like, you know, it, Megan, she, she kind of stopped involving herself in her, in my mom's life about a year before. Um, just cause it's like, you know, you can, you can talk someone into going to rehab. You can talk someone into trying to get healthy and you can take them there and they'll check themselves out. And like, you know, what do you, what do you do at that point? And we weren't like teenagers are just, they're not equipped to deal with that. I don't even think you're equipped to deal with that as a, an early twenties. Um, and so like in hindsight, I don't know if there's anything that, that we could have done. I don't think we, we could have done much

of anything, but yeah. Are, are both you and Alex super disciplined? Not to compare to each other, but compared to the outside world? Yeah. I was actually having this conversation with a client earlier. I have issues when I feel like something has power over me. So she was asking specifically about diet drinks, I think. She keeps them in her house. And I told her a couple of weeks ago, I might have like two diet Pepsis a week or something. And I get them when I'm standing in, you know, line checking out of the store or whatever. And she asked, why don't you have

them in your house? And I said, if I have them in my house, I drink them every day. And I don't like when, when there's something that, that has power over me like that. And I don't know if that's a fear of, of developing a substance abuse problem or like developing an addictive personality. But I've, I find that staying a little more disciplined in my life makes me feel better about, um, like mental health. And like, you know, I, I do things on my terms. I eat things on my terms. I drink things on my terms. There's nothing in my house that has any power control over me at all, except the bag of M&Ms that Alex refuses to not keep in our cabinet.

That's a concession that I make. Alex, are you super disciplined? Yeah, I would say, yeah, extremely so. To the point where it's almost a bit of a, it can be a negative quality in certain circumstances. Are you addicted to being in control? Like, are you, are you tantalized by it? Are you, you get off on it? Yeah, I would say that's, that's, that's fair.

It's just, it's like what, it's the most comfort. It's the most comfortable thing for me to have everything in control, to have a plan, to stick to the plan. When shit hits the fan, it's my go-to. Yeah. I lose my job and fucking just ratchet down all the controls. Yeah. Just start controlling fucking everything, letting everything go. Anything extraneous, everything is just out the window. And to be honest with you, I love it.

I wouldn't change it any other way. I feel so happy when I do that. It's like, oh shit. Like my Sirius XM just expired and it's like $400 per car per year. I'm like, fuck you. Like you were saying, Meredith, that is not going to control me anymore. Fuck Howard Stern, fuck Fox News, fuck CNN, fuck MSNBC, all those things I listened to in the car. Go fuck yourself. Sorry. Go ahead, Brian. go fuck yourself. Sorry. Go ahead, Brian. You're getting robbed there. I signed up for Sirius XM for $35 a year. And every year they ask me if I want to bump to 120 a month. And I'm like,

no, I'll pay 35 a year. I'm canceling my membership. Do you have all the stations? I do. Oh, wow. They're just like, I think their decision is we'll take the 35 over the zero. Because I'm telling them, 35 or I'm out. And I tell them every year. Do you live in Canada? They're like, sorry. Sorry, sorry.

Do you want it for free? Alex, do you want kids? Yeah, I think so. Are you just saying that? No, we've talked about it. I worry about things about it, but, um,

I think when I'm older, I will be like, when I think about having toddlers or like babies, I'm like, eh, I don't want that. But like, I kind of want to have like,

you know, eight year olds and up. Like I want to have like, I have a really good relationship with my mom now. And I kind of want that. Like I want to have, like, I have a really good relationship with my mom now. And I kind of want that. Like, I want to have, I want to have like, you know, that relationship, not necessarily with like a 30 year old daughter, but like, you know, somebody I've, yeah, it's just somebody like to kind of fill up my life a little bit when I'm done spending all my time working out and, you know, doing that stuff. When you bring, everything will change if you bring the baby home, by the way, I think,

I mean, it changed with me. I never wanted kids. Fuck. I didn't want kids. My wife didn't want kids. And then, you know, that she all of a sudden one day she saw another woman breastfeeding. And then we lived with a woman who was breastfeeding. And then all of sudden someone someone said to her if you don't have kids you might regret it if you do have kids you won't regret it and next thing i know she's like i want a kid i'm like what you know we've been talking for 20 years that we'll never get married and never have kids and now you're 39 and you want one um i think one of the things you would really like about it alex is um you get to experiment with them they're your greatest experiment and so like you would really like about it, Alex, is, um, you get to experiment with them. They're your greatest experiment. And so like you can really, um, and they flourish with boundaries.

And so, and I think you would be amazing at giving, did I say Meredith? Sorry, Alex, Alex, you would be, um, you would flourish with kids because you seemed extremely disciplined. And, um, you, if you set boundaries for your kids, really, really strong boundaries, then within there, they can go fucking crazy and flourish. But it's the people who don't set boundaries for their kids. They think they're being mean and they think they're setting their kid free. But really, kids can only be free if they have really crazy strong boundaries. And then because if not, then they're always testing the boundaries and they're not free they're too busy like trying to control their world it's like fuck that just set boundaries but i think you you guys would be amazing parents i think it was actually yesterday in the car meredith goes i'm pretty sure like when you have a kid like not that much changes

like i think you just bring home a baby and it's just there i'm like i meant more like acutely like in the short term like your day-to-day lifeday life is not going to change that much. It doesn't, but the first nine months, I mean, if one of you, if one of you has the baby and the one who's breastfeeding, they're kind of fucked. They're just like, you're just, you're basically just, uh, you're basically just feeding on demand. I mean, that's the way my wife did it. Just you're just feed, you're just feeding, feeding, feeding. But my, my wife learned to get off on it. I mean, she really enjoyed it, the process. And, um, but the first nine months for you, Alex, if she has the baby will be easy. All you have to do is serve Meredith. It's so easy. You just bring water. They just drink gallons of water

to make more and more milk. And you just, yeah. And you just go in the basement and work out. But it really is kind of like that. You just, it's like getting, it's easier than getting a puppy. Way easier than getting a puppy or like it's pissing all over the house and causing problems. Basically, this thing just attaches onto the, onto the mom. The mom feeds it. And then slowly the problems creep in. But it takes like weeks and months and years.

But it adds the problems on incrementally. So you get like, you adapt to it slowly. Yes. One air squat today, but by the end of the year, it's a 500 pound back squat. Sounds doable. Um, what are your, what are, what are, what are your favorite movements and your least favorite movements? We'll start with Alex. I really like monostructural movements like rowing, biking, running. I really like gymnastics just because they were kind of challenging for me. And I just... When you say gymnastics, you mean pull-ups, handstand walk? Yeah. Pull-ups, handstand walk, handstand push-ups, muscle-ups. I think they're cool because not that many, especially females, do them. Um, and then my least favorite, I really dislike deadlifting or like

anything super heavy partially because I'm not very good at it. And partially just cause I always get a sore back after deadlifts. I don't know if you remember there was that deadlift, um, GHD running workout at regionals in 2016. And that just like absolutely destroyed me. It was like seven, three rounds of seven deadlifts at two 75, I think. Yeah. It was four Oh five for the men. That was the work at the main Chandler Smith. Yeah. That was so bad. Anyways, I hope 75 That 275 sounds nuts. Yeah, that was... It was a lot. And when you say your back is sore, like injured sore? No, it's like...

I think it's the way that I'm built. Okay. I have like... I don't even know. I think it's... I have a theory that I have like a long torso. So the fit... Did you ever like deadlifts?

Like when you first started crossfit um no i did i don't think i ever liked them what movements don't you do anymore i don't do a ton of dhd sit-ups like i'll do them leading up to a competition in case they come up but my coach doesn't program them i think or does, it's like maybe once or twice a month. I don't think he likes the way that your body moves in them. Um, who's your coach? Um, Michael Fitzgerald, OPT. And yeah, that's what I thought. And how long has he been your coach? Um, we're coming up on eight years now. Wow. Yeah. It's a long time. Well, please, please tell him I said, hi, we, I, We go way, way, way, way, way back. I met him at his brother's gym in 2008 or 2009.

And then, of course, I saw him do that amazing chipper in 2009. And he's always been a gentleman and a sweetheart of a man to me, both him and his brother, actually. Yeah. a gentleman and a sweetheart of a man to me, both him and his brother, actually. Yeah. Like even, even throughout the per shuffle with CrossFit,

I always, uh, we, we kept a sincere relationship. They were cool. Yeah. How about pistols? My boy,

Josh Bridges says he doesn't do pistols. Yeah. I do pistols. I think, um, maybe somebody, some people have problems with their knees. I think it was,

yeah, he definitely, I think he's missing a knee or something. Yeah. Like Alexis, I can't do pistols unless I'm wearing two knee sleeves. You should quit CrossFit. Like that is so bad. Sacrilege Alex, sacrilege. Meredith, what, what movements, what are your favorite and your least favorite? Um, I like the high skill stuff. like muscle ups any kind of pulling like i've always been a really good puller like when i walked into my first like crossfit i want to try this out class

like i think the fitness assessment included like can you do strict pull-ups and i i could do i walked in off the street and could do like three or four of them. They've always had pulling string. Um, so I like that muscle ups, pull ups, um, strict handstand pushups. I hate keeping handstand pushups. Um, and like snatching as far as like Olympic lifts go. I just, I like that. Uh, my, my snatch has always been freakishly close to my clean and jerk, like inappropriately close to my clean and jerk, um, which is both like cool and also embarrassing. Um, my weakness tends to be, I don't like squatting. I don't like front squats, back squats. I don't have good like squat endurance. I don't have not particularly strong. So in order for me to like, to get into kind of peak elite shape, I just have to do tons and tons of volume to like be able to tolerate

squatting at all. Do you guys go for a run together? Like, well, one of you just wait like at six o'clock at night, like just be like, Hey, you want to go for a run?

And you guys go for a run. We will run together. If it's like pro, we sometimes just have runs programmed and we'll run together, but never just for pleasure. No, we used to, Alex used to run on her rest days and I would go do that with her. But that was, that was way back. It was way back when. And is that, um,

is Alex a better runner than you? I'm making that assumption. She is. She is. I'm a good runner. I just don't, uh, I don't do it as much. She's run a marathon. I've never run a marathon before. Um, I'm like, I've always done well in running events. I'm quick, I'm small. So I just, I run well, but, um, she's better. I'm faster. If it's just a, if it's a sprint, I'm going to win. If it's a 10 K Alex is going to win, but not by like a ton. I, uh, I made her do a half marathon a couple of years ago. It was right after, right before the games. And, um, she, she wasn't planning on at that point, hadn't gotten her invite to the games because of the whole Emily Abbott thing. And it was, uh, it was half, it was in Banff, which is great. It's like good first half marathon to do. And she hadn't done any training whatsoever. And she crossed

the finish line and she just looked at me and was like, fuck that. She's like, if you paid me $200 to run another 100 meters, I wouldn't do it. No. It was supposed to be a casual half, and then Alex is running negative splits for the first seven kilometers, and I get to the end of it, and I ran in like sub 140 at a 724 pace I was like this is not what I signed up to do my body was broken and then like literally two days after they're like hey you're going to the game then I'm like sweet my arch collapsed so that's great news

oh when's your birthday Meredith July 15th when's your birthday Alex September 27th birthday, Meredith? July 15th. When's your birthday, Alex? September 27th. Damn. Damn, damn, damn. I was thinking Meredith. Every show I think, I was telling Brian, I think someone has the same birthday as me. When's your birthday? No. March 16th. Okay.

Do you have any questions, Brian? I have one last question, but it's a fucking doozy. I have one question I've been wanting to ask. Alex, why did you cut your hair um that's a good question I I think I used to have short hair when I was a kid like really short like everyone thought I was a boy and I didn't care because all I cared about was playing sports um but then I got to junior high like grade seven and started feeling like really self-conscious

about the way that I looked with my short hair and like looking like a boy. So I grew it out. And then when I came out, um, I told myself, I'm like, I'm never going to cut my hair. Like, I'm not going to be that stereotypical lesbian. It's not. And then, I don't know. I just like really get annoyed with, I was getting so annoyed with long hair. Like I, I just, I hate, I hated any time. Like it blew in my face. I hated, and then I, I was just wearing it up all the time. So after COVID hit, um, I didn't get my haircut for a really long time because all the salons were closed. And so one day I was just like, you know what? I think I might just cut my hair off.

And I asked a few people if I should do it, and they were like, do it. So I did it. Why not shorter than that, going the other way? Why not just go like Brian, just buzz it? I was thinking about doing that recently, and Meredith was like, absolutely never do that. Are you going to grow long again? Will you just grow long again? I think probably eventually I'll grow it long again. Like just let it grow for three years and then cut it short again. Let it grow for three years.

I think that's kind of cool to do that. I'm doing that with my beard. I cut my beard completely off and look like I was 37 and now I'm growing. I'm gonna look like I'm 77. Does it feel weird having a big beard? No, it's, it becomes addicting. You start just doing that. You,

I started doing a lot of this. The only thing that's weird is when it gets, um, people start treating you different cause you start looking really old. And then, um, when this, that when food starts getting in it,

then it's like, you, it's annoying. But other than that, it's it, then it's annoying. But other than that, it's fun. Can I ask you a question, Saman? Yes. How come you don't cut your kids' hair? Do they like having long hair or is it just...

I don't think they like it. They don't like having long hair or short hair? I don't think they like having long hair. So it's funny. Some people like have accused me of doing it to be progressive and like gender neutral and like, and that's a hundred percent not true. And I dress them in girl's pants from Amazon and people think I do that to be cause like gender neutral. No, the reason why I dress them in girl's pants from Amazon originally and those white tank tops always is because um i really like

baryshnikov do you guys know who he is he's like a ballet dancer from a long time ago and like and i'm armenian and i just thought that was so masculine like the russian ballet dancer i just love that and of course that doesn't fly in america because we have different cultural norms right and i just love masculinity you know what i Like, I just like the bald guy with the big mustache. And I like, I just think it's just like cool stuff. Fun stuff. Like, not in a, I just think it's fun. Right?

Anyway, so, and although I was never, I never personified that myself. But I thought, okay, when I have kids, I'm going to dress them like this and dress them like Berzhnikov. And then I realized, oh, I have three kids, man, this is fucking easy. These pants are only $9 each. They can work out in them in every single situation. They can run, they can jump, they can play. And we're always doing shit. Like if I told you the schedule, I keep my kids on, you would think I was out of my fucking mind. And then I started putting those sweaters on them. I'm going to get to the hair. I started putting those sweaters on them and that was their outfit. And so I thought, oh wow, I have these kids that can work out and play any sport on a moment's notice. And yet they're so cute and adorable that you will, everyone will just want to like the world will

treat them well. Cause the kid with the rat tail. Yes. Right. So I, then, um, people, and people started like being like, oh, you're going to confuse them about their sex or their gender, this and that. And I'm like, dude, I don't give a fuck. Like they got dicks that like, there's no, I can't. And I never talked to my kids about that too. So my kids are like, uh, Avi asked, um, uh, one of them asked their mom the

other day, can I marry a boy? And Haley says, yes. And then it says, can I marry a girl? And he says, yes. Like we don't expound on it. We don't talk to him. Oh, treat people like we don't talk to him about color or sex or any of that. Cause it doesn't matter to them. What those things will come. Like if he, you only, you answer the question as minimal as possible. You don't feed kids your own insecurities or any of that shit. At least that's what I believe. I'm not there to teach them any of that stuff until they're ready. Just the answer and move on. But I do tell them the stove is hot and they have long hair and that shit will catch on fire, right? Because that's an eminent threat. So basically their hair started growing long and they started growing long and like, we just never cut it and

we just never cut it and we just never cut it. And now they're four and they've never had a haircut. Well, now the people say, why do you cut it? And I don't, I still don't know why, but my wife does the brushing out of it at night and it is literally, it's, I mean the screams and the yelling and it is fucking nuts. And my wife's done with it. Like she actually told me last night when she went to bed, she's all, she's all just give me the word and I'll set the appointment. So I think it's, um, I think it's attached. I'm attached to it because it's four years of growth, you know, the same way, like you might have a favorite t-shirt and you know, it's got to go. And, um, yeah, I'm just attached to it and laziness. And I liked, I like extreme shit. I like, I like, you know, like I took out the backseat in my car in high school and

filled it with speakers, you know? Like, yeah, I like extreme shit. We were talking, sorry. No, I'm done. No, we were talking. We're like, I really want to know why his kids have such long hair. Like, cause we were, both of us i i really want to know why his kids have such long hair like because we were both of us had experiences and meredith was a swimmer so she always she was like

man i i don't know how like as a kid with long hair like that was painful combing it and they they have that stuff i'm sure they still have it it's like detangler we have all that shit we have like five bottles of detangler. We got the conditioner. We got the shampoos. I mean, literally 20 minutes before shower time, the four-year-olds will walk up to me and be like, we want to shower with our hair up. You know what I mean? Like they don't want, like, they know.

Haley, let's get their hair cut, babe. Let's get their hair cut. Alex is gently telling me that we're abusing our kids. That's just not cool. Yeah. I was curious. Oh, she said, so that's another fun thing. She just said, Alex, Ari just said, that's one of my sons, a four-year-old said, Hey, can we get our hair cut? So people will know we're boys. So nobody ever said, I mean, I hear a hundred times a day not a hundred times i hear six or seven times a day you have the most beautiful girls or you have the most athletic girls or something

about you girls and no one ever gets it right they're boys and finally last week one of the four-year-olds said hey we're boys i was like oh shit oh shit. Oh, shit. So here's the question, the final question. So I'm an expert in women. I've been around them my whole life. I came from a woman vagina, and then I was in a household with my mom and my sister growing up. And my mom was very menopausal. So like the week before her period would come and shit could get really intense in our house and then i've been with my wife for 20 years and um and i feel

like i've figured out some some stuff so oh and i'm just making this up i don't know the exact times but but the psychology part i think i out. So the week before a period comes, I could say something to her that I say all the time. Like, do the kids have ballet on Monday? And she would say, and normally she would just be like, oh, yeah. And then, but if I ask it when she's premenopausal, she will come up with a response in her head. Like, she'll respond with, what's a good example? Do you have an example for me? Basically, she reads into what I'm saying.

She'll read into what I'm saying and then respond to what she read into. God, I want to give you a good example. I normally have so many good examples. This is one of my favorite subjects. But she'll say, why the car doesn't have gas again? And then instead of just going back and saying, oh, no, no, sweetheart, I just want to know if they have a Monday. I'll be like, yeah, the car has gas. Why do you ask that? And the next thing we know, and she's like, why are you always so bossy and demand that I put gas in the car?

And all of a sudden, I'm going down this rabbit hole because she answered, she thought I said something that I didn't say, but the other three weeks I could have said it. And it's never goes that way ever, ever, ever. She basically answered the question in her head and then responded to her answer or made a presupposition. And so like, I, I'll even know, like sometimes like, I'll be like, yo, your period's coming. She's like, no, it's not. I don't, I'm not supposed to have for another three weeks. And then the next day she'd be like, oh shit, you're right yo your period's coming she's like no it's not i don't i'm not supposed to have for another three weeks and then the next day she'll be like oh shit you're right my period's coming my period came you know and um when you hit and it's really it's really hard because someone has to stay fucking present if i go down that rabbit hole with her i'm just as guilty as she is like i i fucking bit like you dumb fuck like hold the

space chill when you have two women when you have two i mean and i guess you could do you guys notice that in your relationship like all of a sudden you guys are i mean i'm assuming you guys are cycling at the same time because you live together well here's the thing and i think it answers your question oh the uh we we start to like we start to sync up and we both have those tendencies in the week before. I think it's like it's sort of it's hard to notice when you're the person that's being the asshole that you're being an asshole. But and I don't even say it's being an asshole, but but it's just being like oversensitive or, you know, whatever that is. And I can see it when Alex is when it happens to Alex.

Is that what happened like over the weekend? It must be. see it when alex is when it happens to alex is that what happened like over the weekend it must be um i think no man i'm like i'm just always crazy i think that i think we start to like sync up and then the universe is like no no no no no no no no you can't that that can't happen and then so alex will get all off it like it seems it sounds like it might be convenient to be synced up, but really I think it would just be a recipe for some very massive fights. Yeah.

Yeah. Someone has to stay on the outside and just be like, I'm here. Yeah. Okay. You just take it. Someone has to, yeah.

Someone has to anchor to the earth or the other person. Like, yeah. Okay, good. That makes me feel better. You guys deal with that shit too yeah that's awesome yeah for sure all right all right meredith always says gentlemen

she she thinks everyone should date a girl at some point in their life like even straight girls every girl should date a girl just so you understand how fucking crazy you are like that like that should be a requirement for all women. Just so you get it. It's, I think there's enough, I think there's enough romantic comedies now. I mean,

I was watching a movie with a woman the other night and watching a movie. It's about a relationship. And she's like, Oh my God, that's just like me. You're like, you got to nervously laugh. You're like,

I'm never like that, but you are. It's fine. It's just part of the female existence. Does the world treat you differently with short hair, Alex? Like the world treats me differently when I have a beard. I don't think people think I'm as pretty as I am with long hair. Like I don't. Yeah, I think too. Well,

it's hard to say because I got, you see a lot of like compliments. They, that was reduced. Um, when I started dating Meredith, like publicly, and I, I think that partially has to do with just being in a relationship with someone. And then second, being gay maybe is just you don't get like guys, whatever. Not that it was like crazy. It's just now I feel I actually feel less attracted with short hair. I don't know if that's like me projecting onto the world like that. I don't get treated the same. I get called a boy sometimes.

So I think there's that too. I'm like a little self-conscious, but for the most i don't care that much long hair is beautiful it's beautiful on men it is beautiful on men and women hair is beautiful it really is it is yeah i do miss my long hair sometimes and it wasn't even that long it was just like normal long hair but well thank you you're welcome that was fun good i was waiting for you to say that and i'll let you go yeah thank you so much i really enjoyed this this is i i i you guys are the first women we've had on the podcast And terrified of women We should have them back sometime And talk about

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, easy buddy Easy buddy Yeah, they're very smart, they've got a lot to share with the world You guys are so easy What's the plan today, what do you guys do today? Mondays are usually Busy with work, so we Kind of finished up early, I was up early

Because this was on the calendar So probably just wrap up Uh, Mondays are usually busy with work. So we, we kind of finished up early. I was up early. Um, cause this was on the calendar. So probably just wrap up some things that we have left and then it's, uh, nice and sunny out. So we'll go for good under the river and go for a run together. We run at different speeds now. What was that? No one has to work now? No, we're all, we're all done. We start really early. I like to get up really early on work days. That's awesome. Yeah.

Why did you guys do this? Were you guys stressed out about this at all? The podcast? Yeah, why do a podcast? I don't know. We do our own. So I think I honestly used to be way more nervous about doing our own podcast and putting out material and wondering if people were going to like it or if they were going to get offended by it. Cause you know,

sometimes we have messaging that's a little against the grain and I, so I don't get nervous doing podcasts anymore, especially when I don't have to be the one that's like prompting it and asking questions. Yeah. If you're not hosting it, it's awesome. Yeah.

It's super. Especially being the co-host. It's the best. All right. Well, the co-host. It's the best. All right. Well, thank you. Yeah, I second that with Brian. In another 30 episodes, when we'll be 30 episodes better, we'll come back at you and talk nutrition. We'll be here.

Sounds good. Okay. Awesome. Have a great day, guys. Thank you. Yeah, thank you, Brian.