The Sevan Podcast - #355 - The Grind Never Stops

Episode Date: April 2, 2022

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To get started, just open the app. It's as easy as that. See the PC Optimum app for details. Bam, we're live. Fuck, I forgot to put up the video. I started the show and didn't even have the video oh good morning guys matthew semelsberger today on the podcast, UFC fighter, bad dude. He is a bad, bad dude. He beat up our other guest, AJ Fletcher.

And when I say beat him up, man, it was a good fight. It was a good fight. Matthew Simmons. He's going to be in his car this morning for the first part of the interview. I don't know. Should I feel disrespected? Ten and three hundred and seventy pounds, six foot one. Matthew Semelsberger.

Interesting cap focused, dedicated. He's a good dude. A lot of these guys, it's funny, the UFC kind of reminds me of CrossFit in the way that it's where other professional athletes go to die. You guys feel me on that? How in the world did you not have Dave and Greg on as an April Fool's podcast title, Step Up Your Game?

Shit. Can I do that tomorrow, Travis? I'm sorry, I screwed that up. Good morning, Bruce. Good morning, Heidi. Miss Jody. Jody, did you change your picture? Amanda stack? No, you didn't. I confused you with a soccer mom for a second. Uh, this guy, the last guy we had on, I don't know if you remember that cool dude who had the, um, uh, uh, barbershop dairy and weeks. We had him on a couple of days ago. God, I love my voice when I'm sick. You guys, I was so sick a couple of days ago. I mean, like, like, like so, so, so, so, so, so sick. I couldn't, I kept getting up in the middle of the night

because my throat was so sore. I couldn't stay down. It hurts so bad. So I'd gurgle hot water. It would break up the phlegm. Mmm, yummy. And then I'd go back to sleep. And then I woke up in the morning that day, and my throat was fine. And yesterday, my head was so congested that I felt like my head was going to explode. It hurt so bad. I rode the assault bike four 10-minute little runs, let the snot drain out of my nose. That was good, but still horrible. And so yesterday, I took 2,000 milligrams of vitamin C every hour for like,

I don't know, 10 hours. I probably took 20,000 milligrams. And then this morning I woke up and I'm like, I'm a King, a King, not like a full King. If I was a full King, I wouldn't be wearing this hat. I'd slick my hair back and matted my beard down. Semi King, semi, semi. What are the odds of the UFC fighter not showing up? up no he texts this morning let's see what's going on anyway he's in the same weight class as darian weeks those of you who follow the show religiously uh darian's 170 pounds he was the cat who owned the barber shop in sedalia sedalia missouri and he's the one who's fighting Ian Gary. And Ian Gary's supposed to be the next Conor McGregor. Well, this guy that we're having on today

is in the same weight class. I told one of my, oh, you know what else I did? I normally only sleep six hours. Last night I slept eight hours. And I don't want to tell you guys this, but I took some, I took like a knockoff brand of Tylenol. They're like the 650 milligram ones. It says it's for what's that shit old people get when your

joints hurt, whatever that thing is. It says it's for that. But my wife told me to take, take those. And I took two of those arthritis. Um, I took two of those and, uh, and I, and I set myself up to sleep for eight hours and I woke up this morning and I was just great. I think, I don't know why I'm old school vitamin C. I should have a picture of somebody's mom on the bottom of this shirt. Just here to bang. This is the weirdest shirt it's so unlike me to wear something like this so unlike yeah dylan's got the other version of it right um and it what's even weirder is my wife bought it for me and this is like my wife is i can't tell you my wife's like that she doesn't talk like this,

just hear the bang. She's like straight as an arrow. I don't know. I don't know how to explain her. But very, very nice, kind, gentle, not vile, doesn't swear.

I mean, we are not cut from the same cloth at all. Okay, let me text this guy you coming you coming uh so this guy matthew simmonsberger um just fought aj fletcher who we've had on the show before another 170 pounder and And they went the, uh, did they go the distance or did he choke AJ out? Let's see. And it kind of broke my heart,

but this dude's a good dude. You know, I don't want all of it. Oh yeah. So it went to decision against AJ. Yeah. Let's see. Can you interview your wife one day? We'd love to hear,

but no, I don't want to do that. You know, what's funny is Can you interview your wife one day? We'd love to hear, but no, I don't want to do that. You know what's funny is I did interview her one show. And the audio was all screwed up. It was when I prerecorded. Dude, I'm having issues getting my phone settings to allow mic and camera access to stream while driving. Is there any way we could reschedule for another set time? I'm sorry, guys. I had some legit important things spring up. Sorry if I'm delayed responding to my

car. Okay. Okay. Sounds good. Let's reschedule. Ah, ah. Susan's watching this right now, panicking. He's probably like a CrossFit Livermore going, oh my God, I need to get to a computer and help Sevan. The team is so good. Maybe Will or Caleb or... I don't think these people know that the show is live. They don't. They don't know.

I love my phone. Oh, look, there's Caleb. Jeez. Hey. Morning. Don't you have work? Oh, I don't even have my headphones plugged in. I wouldn't have known until someone talked.

Don't you have something to do, like jump out of an airplane or some shit no i did that yesterday did you no oh where are you nebraska oh you're visiting family yep are you doing this because you're deploying no just that you would have done this anyway yeah i just yeah this is someone's house is this your parents house or something yeah look how nice it is look at the ceiling and you got tapestries hanging do you think you'll ever get old and like do shit like that you have like a nice place man i hope so oh my goodness oh my goodness this is gonna screw up our my live call-in show on the um that i'm supposed to do tomorrow morning i'm gonna send you over god i'm so prepared by the way caleb thank you for coming on yeah of course funny that these

what i was kind of excited to have him oh yeah oh were you gonna come on anyway yeah oh yeah that would have been awesome he's good he's a good fighter yeah he is he's a great fighter i think you know it's funny are you following this guy this guy ian gary i don't think it's the real deal like everyone says he is do you no i don't think so either i'm just by just from the little bits that i've seen from him uh or like just the little um pieces i've seen i think he's a little bit overrated i think they're they're making them out to be a little bit more than he is and patty um i agree and patty pemblitt pemblitt the guy that i'm pumping up to um

uh i feel like every fight he takes a really heavy shot in the beginning patty does or yeah yeah patty yeah gary gets in just fights that's why i don't think he's gonna last he just gets in fights it's like it's but as soon as he gets that big hit like from patty he's just like he turns him on i don't know yeah maybe let me see what dylan's saying here dylan val tell him to unplug his phone from the car my phone won't allow me to facetime while It turns them on. Yeah, maybe. Let me see what Dylan's saying here. Dylan Val. Tell him to unplug his phone from the car. My phone won't allow me to FaceTime while it's plugged in. Maybe a similar issue.

That's good advice to know in the future. I cut him loose. Anyone who's asking for a reschedule, I just say just cut loose. Just cut loose. Okay, let's start with something crazy. Do you see this thing um um on the bottom it says why do all black people look alike do you see that i said i just sent you the email i don't even know i don't know how long it takes for an email

to get to nebraska takes a while you know we've got pretty we've got like farmland internet there's there's all these things in life that i don't understand you remember in the shows like you might be too young but in the 80s there'd be a show and like two guys would be talking like a black dude and a white dude and the white dude would be like and you people and then the black guy would like pull his head back like this and then the the crowd would laugh like the i never understood why that was funny i never understood why that was offensive like i don't understand why you're not supposed to say you people, those people. I don't know why you're not supposed to say that.

Okay, yeah, let's play this. Let's play this. This guy's delivery is dope. So the dude heckles me from the back of the room, and he says this. Michael Jr., I was wondering, why do all black people look alike? And the whole crowd froze. So all white audience, they didn't know how I was going to respond or what I was going, why do all black people look alike? And the whole crowd froze. It's an all white audience. They didn't know how I was going to respond or what I was going to do.

They had no idea. I didn't know how I was going to respond or what I was going to do. They didn't know if I was going to throw a chair, get mad. They had no idea. When I said these words, I didn't even think them. When I said them, I was hearing them for the first time. He said, Micah Jr., why do all black people look alike? I was like, we don't all look alike. You just got to cut the eye holes in your sheet a lot bigger.

So no, no, no one. No one thinks that all Asian people look alike or all black people – that's a good joke. I like it. It's funny. And his delivery is awesome. But no one thinks that all black people look alike or all Asian people look alike or all Jews look alike or all Armenians look alike because they're racist. It's because they just haven't been around those people. so if you go to africa and i spent a shitload of time in africa you very you very quickly realize that you can even tell um you can tell the somalians different from the kenyans from the ethiopians i mean you can start like not only tell that everyone looks different but that they're different um ethnicities the black people aren't even the same not even close

it would be like comparing me to fucking the flowing dutchman that dude remember that dude we had on from the netherlands right like we're both white dudes you never fucking confuse the two of us that's the way that's the that's the variance in black dudes in africa and so i don't get any of that i don't get how that's just more systemic racism being driven by the left they like that's all you must be offended of course all asian people look the same if you fucking have never if you go to china and you're a white dude or you're a black dude and it's not racist it's because it's something psychological we would need like it it's because we're it's the way we lump shit together it's why like i can tell snakes apart

very quickly i'm a fucking reptile expert, but other people can't. I get it. Sorry, go ahead. What were you going to say? Are you the one that was going on runs, leaving old fruit on the sidewalk and taking pictures of them? No, no.

But as a kid, did you catch reptiles as a kid? Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Did you keep them? Yeah, yeah. So I used to live in California, and there was just a trail in our backyard, and we used to uh there was like just a trail

like in our backyard and like me and my buddies would just go out there and like we would catch like these like like almost like desert type lizards or like super dry looking like it's all super scaly had a bunch of patterns on them were they horny toads were they the ones with like the turtle head and they had the horns on top they're kind of rare some of them were but not very they look like ninja turtles no okay yeah it was pretty rare that we'd find one of those but yeah they're rare they're cool though to get and they're slow as fuck yeah right like literally we could just walk up behind them and they'd be just like propped up on a tree and you could just like yeah off of it real quick it was super easy and then other ones like i had one it was like the width

of like a cable and it was just like this yeah yeah yeah yes fastest lizard on the planet look at us reptile talk yes incredible it was so crazy i had never seen one of those and then you like pick it up it's like super slimy and like one of them i caught it had like a you could see its intestines like it had like you'd see like its liver it's like in little bowels and it had like a you could see its intestines like it had like you'd see like its liver it's like in little bowels and it's like when you turn him on his back no like from the side like you can see it from the side it was the craziest thing and i tried to keep it i put it in a little container but then like the air holes were too big and then it like crawled out so then it was gone but i like this mic i was just thinking well i didn't like this mic

that's it i was just thinking man i didn't like this mic that's it i was just thinking man this motherfucker needs to turn his shit up it's your gas station headphones well so are they yeah i got them on a road trip like just in a pinch oh yeah i didn't have any headphones and my airpods were dead and i couldn't charge them and so i just stopped at a gas station and there were obviously like 30 headphones because gas station and there were obviously like $30 headphones because gas station, everything's so expensive. I understand. I understand the blackface thing. I don't, I don't think anyone should be offended by it, but I understand it historically. I guess there was, um, white dudes would paint their faces and dance like black people. And there was like, it was some sort of like making fun of their culture. I get it. But still, like if I wanted to go as

Tupac as Halloween, I should be able to paint myself black and it shouldn't offend anyone. The fact that it does is completely, it is that it is those, it's the insistence of those things that keeps the hatred in the division alive. It is. And what's, what's, it's, it's amazing that we, that we, that those people think that who are enforcing that are actually doing the right thing, but you're actually enforcing it. You're enforcing there to be something there that's not. But several on it is there. They used to make fun of, but they don't anymore. our black artists more than more than anything who doesn't love kanye beyonce sydney port sydney portier denzel washington everyone loves all the black artists you know

what the fucking worst thing about will smith smacking chris rock is because we love both of them they're dope will smith is will smith is you know johnny johnny depp you know like you go see a movie you know it's gonna be horrible and you still see it because will smith's in it someone did you see morning chocos instead this morning i block them so i don't see their shit and i'm i need to oh wait morning chocop no someone sent me the meme guy posted something about me and then and then i can't say his name anymore the batman i'm not saying his name ever again on my show but what can i call him the rat man the batman uh he he made a video this morning do you want to see the morning choco post yeah sure i hope it's not about me

i don't think they're allowed to say my name. Oh, yeah. Awesome. That's good. That's good. That's good. Oh, okay, Bruce. I won't do that. I won't do it. Don't call him the Batman.

You're the Batman. I saw, and the meme guy posted, and man, the internet really is forever. I wish I would have never posted that photo the meme guy posted something I can't tell if it's making fun of me I think they blocked the Sevan podcast Instagram too

those mother but I can't tell those mother, um, but, uh, I can't, I can't tell. I, I, my default, if someone makes fun of me is that they want to be friends with me.

It's not to be offended. So I can't tell. I didn't think that they wanted to be friends with me when the New York times wrote that shit about me. Uh, he doesn't have morning chocolate block. Jason. Ha.

He meant make wads. Yeah. I might have morning chocolate block too. And make wads great again. I, I don't, I block people not because I don't want them to see my shit. It's because I don't want to accidentally see their shit.

I don't want them getting into my, like, yeah, this, this. Yeah. I, I don't even know why this is this.

I don't, I don't know why this is funny though will you liked it will branstetter liked it will probably made that shit and sent it over there that's uh yeah exactly jason watkins got it uh They hate me because they want to date me. Thank you. Thank you. I'm thinking about getting a new office chair.

I think it would help the show a lot. It would change shit up quite a bit. Can you show the new office chair that I'm thinking of getting? Yeah, yeah. Caleb, I don't know if we have a budget for a chair this fancy but but i really want to uh oh i want it might be tight but i want to i want to look at that thing bam what's this thing is that that squirts your butt with water i i don't know it looks like it's just distributing toilet paper to you oh really it

oh yeah like there was a rag on there that polishes your butt wow wow wow that way you don't have to take a bathroom break in the middle of the show anymore is that like a robotic robotic hand on there yeah it looks like a Terminator hand. Oh, I would take that Kleenex off and just let that thing tickle me. Hey, hey, so that's not even a real chair. Okay, I thought that was a real chair. Wouldn't that be incredible?

That'd be great. You'd never have to leave your chair. It gives you a prostate exam. Oh my goodness love that okay let's look at this uh i don't know i i type fast it says diphagia i don't even know what that means but just it says mouth purifier this is nuts this is absolutely nuts i i wonder what the implication i wonder what the i wonder what's worse the the the emf from the bluetooth the electrical current around your mouth but this is real i actually looked this up to make sure this wasn't a joke this is a dyson headphone air purifier what this is so if you're so scared of like germs and bad air, you wear this.

Can you imagine covering your face with that? I heard some kids talking the other day. I'm trying to think where it was. And they were saying that they saw that their classmates for the first time in over a year, it was these little boys talking and he said he hadn't seen, he saw a girl for the first time in over a year. And the last time he saw her, she wasn't pretty.

And now she's pretty. Cause they took their masks off again. I was, he was dropping on these little kids talking. I was like, Holy shit. There's even a conversation mode for you. We need to retitle this video to not ufc i and i think more than one ouch ouch ouch

we're trying we're trying i'm not gonna i'm not gonna do the whole um i'm not gonna do the whole show i'm just gonna do like 40 more minutes um yeah i'm just gonna do like 40 more minutes i spoke to uh brian um friend last night do you know who that is the guy comes on the show and talks about crossfit stuff yeah i think so sounds familiar good and i get upstate oh my computer wants to restart and update right now that's a good way to end the show um and so those of you who don't know um tomorrow we do have a live call-in show at 7 a.m oh i should put in the live call-in number and see um suza was suggesting that this number doesn't work so let's see if it does work um we have a live call-in show tomorrow

and then sunday we have uh you have genny from-in show tomorrow, and then Sunday we have Yevgeny from Ukraine. And then Monday we have Con Porter. But in the evening we have a ranking show with Brian Friend. And I don't know exactly the details. It's at 6.30 p.m. Pacific Standard Time. I don't know exactly the details of the ranking. It's kind of weird. Oh, okay, it okay it does work well that's nice to know let's see maybe i should change the ringer oh there's all sorts of people calling oh i've never done i've never done a party line i've never done a party line

line. Caller, speak your mind. They're both going to talk at the same time. Oh, no, wait, wait, oops. Hello. Is this Beaver? Yeah, this is Beaver. Yeah, okay. It works.

You've reached the hot Beaver hotline. We got other people calling. Okay, bye. That was nice of him. Hello? Hello. Hi, how are you? Good, how are you doing? Do you have anything to say or are you just a friend of the show testing out the line? I mean, I was just helping to call

to test your live calling number, but I also wanted to talk about him who we don't speak of. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. Speak to me about him who we don't speak of. Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. Speak to me about him who we don't speak of. Yes. Let's call him something fucked up like Muhammad. You're not supposed to draw a picture of Muhammad,

right? What can we call him? He needs his own nickname on this show. Because if we say his name, then he might show up, right? And the bats will start showing up. Oh, darn it. He does have multiple ID addresses, oh darn it he's also like

i didn't really block him by the way that was a joke i wouldn't block the guy i don't have any oh i just coughed up something yellow i don't have any like serious issues with him you know what i mean i'm just i'm just he he's like i said he's just like that he's like a fireplace and every once in a while i want to spray a little water on it watch steam come off of it you know like i feel like you've only like like you did a very cursory job at looking at what he's actually trying to say though so the whole the whole thing is like process going downhill with actually keeping people accountable that are all over instagram and trying to promote their own brands and trying to do their,

Hey, look at how fit I am without actually holding to the same standards of 10 years ago that I feel like everyone kind of reminisces about. Why? You think there were better standards before? I think it was upheld better. I think people actually upheld better. I think people actually took pride in it.

People, like, why would Mal O'Brien just immediately block someone that just, like, said, hey, you didn't do muscle-ups right? It's such a simple thing to say. Because Matt Fraser told her to. What does it say? I bet you there's some truth to that. I bet you there's some truth to that. I bet you there's some truth to that. Yeah, I don't know. I feel like it's everywhere.

Jason Hopper's not allowed to come on while he's competing because Matt told him not to, and Matt O'Brien has to block everyone that Razor tells her to. I don't know. Just a guess. It's a guess. Don't get offended, anybody. Just a guess.

Actually, I don't give a fuck if you get offended hey hey did you watch his video so last night someone called me and go hey watch his video on um watch he who shall not be names video on um on any screwing up the shirt market too this motherfucker selling shirts for 13 bucks screwing everyone else making the rest of us look like we're gouging people which we are and um he he he made this 18 minute video way too long he made fun of me for two hour videos and was in talking about how cool his 10 minute videos are now he's got an 18 minute video and it's a solution for the um for the uh uh annika greer situation first of all it's my solution the first nine minutes are exactly what i've said three times so he didn't give me credit he plagiarized that shit off of me and the second thing is is you can't give the money back if they're right that's not the point

because they're not right if you want an appeal you have to pay the money and the money's gone you don't get the money back if you make it to the games and he even sounded a little woke to me a little woke i'm gonna take something off his utility belt if he sounds woke again takes those handcuffs or something that dildo he carries around on his utility belt i'm gonna take it off he he no i'll leave the dildo just take the loop he said that he said that we're gonna charge a thousand bucks or 500 bucks, whatever he said.

And then he says, and I know some of you are going to complain that not everyone has money. Who cares if not everyone has money? Not everyone has con porters hair. Not everyone has any Thor's daughter's abs. Not everyone has just the fucking entire package that rich Froning has. Like who, like that was just,

that was just woke talk makes me think he's getting soft i think we're already we're already down the road where we shouldn't have even taken the fork so like the whole anika greer situation the whole point of process like everyone has people yeah he's getting soft we we nailed it you're right he took the wrong fork sorry explain i see what you're saying he's getting soft we nailed it you're right he took the wrong fork sorry explain I see what you're saying he's getting soft we've already I might have to take his badge off him he's no longer the rep sheriff he's now the woke

sheriff trying to look for solutions okay go ahead sorry keep interrupting you but if everyone had equal opportunity to put in scores then it doesn't freaking matter what your reasons are that you didn't put your score in. Right.

Like you're not allowed to be special just because you're top. Oh, what was, what? Well, I think you should be, I do. I do.

I do think that you should be special if you're a top athlete. You think you should get special treatment for them? Yes. Yes. That's not woke? No, no, it's not. That's not el and that's not yes that's not woke no no it's not no it's not woke no uh woke is as if you denied it woke would be like if you were doing it without without admitting that it was wrong like like i'm admitting that it's wrong like um like affirmative action is racism to fight racism and in the end you only have racist people what we're saying what what i'm saying is this listen if you want a second chance for the for

the everyone has the same rules to follow this is it and i think you and i agree here get the shit on time at a certain time blah blah blah for some reason, there's some circumstance that you think that the judges should look at it because something happened, regardless of what it is. I don't even care what the criteria is. Then you have to pay 500 bucks to get that extra look at it, no matter if you're the worst person or the best person. And for 500 bucks, they'll look at it. And then they'll come back to you and give you an answer. And for 500 bucks, they'll look at it. And then they'll come back to you and give you an answer. Like, I like that.

I like that. I like that a lot because you never know what, but it doesn't matter whether it's, I don't, I think, I think it's the governing body's decision. Plus this thing is privately owned, right? I do like the fact that I do like what Andrew Hiller says. Damn it. I said his name. So praise for impact.

We just talked about this. I do like what he said about setting precedent about how, when you take something to court and that, that was cool. That was, that was the only thing new that he offered that I hadn't talked about. At least three different times. At what point are you going to just let, like, okay, Tia,

you're so good across it. Forget about the open. You're just good enough. Yeah, I agree. Hey, part of me does think that she shouldn't have to do the open. I know now we're swimming way off topic, but it should be like you won the games once. You don't have to do the open. You won the like you won the games. Once you don't have to do the open,

you won the games two times in a row. You don't have to do the open, the quarterfinals. You won the games three times in a row. You don't have to do the open, the quarterfinals or the semifinals. Maybe there's something like that. Okay.

Last thing. Favorite part about Andrew Hiller is he makes fun of Dave Eagle nonstop because she's a complete fraud. So there's that. How is she? How is she a fraud? How is she a fraud? She's a complete fraud so there's that how is she how is she a fraud how is she a fraud she's not a fraud every single one of her instagram posts is all about just showing her ass number one number two yeah but that's not that's not fraud right unless it's a fake it's like

you're disguising your feet as fitness when it's really just about like fever getting guys to look at you okay number two all of your reps are shady in every aspect all of your muscle up all of your pistols like everything is just trying to cut corners i was just i was just tripping on the fact that there are girls who are posting just this crazy shit right i mean I mean, just like nonstop, just, just basically they're, they look like playboy photo shoots, like the picture you use on the cover of playboy before you open it and see the naked pictures. And then there's people like Danielle Brandon, who it's just like,

she's wearing a shirt that's too big for her and just walking on a cloud couch and opening blinds. And it's sexier than the, than the riskation. And I just, I, I find that like I watched that video of her opening her blinds like five times. I don't even know why. It's just like, it's like it's enough to see her thighs step. It's enough to see her thighs step up onto the couch and open the blinds. You know what I mean? It's like, it's enough. I maybe I'm old, but it's all I need.

I'm good. Get me through the day. All right. All right. All right. Thank you, sir. Okay.

Peace. All right. Someone called. I don't, I don't, I don't, I can't call Daniel, Danny Spiegel a fraud.

I don't know. What does that mean? That word fraud? I can't call it fraud. I mean, shit, whatever she's doing, I don't know. She's part mean? That word fraud? I can't call it fraud. I mean, shit, whatever she's doing, I don't know.

She's part. I think she's partying. She's doing what she wants to do. How about that dude yesterday? A hundred miles with an average six 48 mile pace. Zach bitter on a treadmill. Yeah. Both right.

Yeah. Yeah. That's right. Treadmill and a track yeah it's nuts that's absurd that's like some psycho shit like i said i could run that for maybe three miles but that's way too many i ran 10 miles on a on a treadmill once and then i ran one mile one day and then two miles the next day all the way up to to 10 miles once. And then, and then I read, I ran 10 miles on a track one time. Have you ever done that? Yeah. And I can, it was nuts. Yeah. And it was so much. So how I

counted is, is I just kept moving out lanes. Okay. So started on the inside for one two three four and then back in one mile one two three four two miles it was nuts you just wanted like it was just the most monotonous 10 miles ever huh yeah and and it was just it was so stressful counting why because you didn't want to get the count wrong or what yeah if you got the count wrong because you know anytime you count wrong i don't know about you but if you count wrong i just have to add one yeah i either add one or i'll just go back to the beginning depending on where i'm oh shit that's real punishment i remember dan bailey saying at one time and i was like it's not a bad idea so wow wow going back to the beginning is brutal but i always add one

uh that's because I have integrity Mars hi not hi hi do you hear him I don't hear him hear me now okay hey I know I know

the side thing all you really need is a Sears catalog oh for getting turned on I didn't even mean it getting turned on by the way The side thing. All you really need is a Sears catalog. Come on, let's not lie. Oh, for getting turned on. I didn't even mean it getting turned on, by the way. I'm like joking. But I do, I'm like, if it was a dude with like crazy legs, it would have been cool too. Or a giraffe.

Like it'd be cool to see a giraffe stand. Super simple. I would love to see a giraffe stand on a couch. I know no one listening to the show right now has ever seen a giraffe stand on a couch. FanD no one listening to the show right now has ever seen a giraffe stand on a couch. FanDuel Casino's exclusive live dealer studio has your chance at the number one feeling, winning, which beats even the 27th best feeling, saying I do. Who wants this last parachute?

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um, naked. You can just take a Instagram. You could take over just by having a giraffe stand on a couch. No one's ever seen this before. I just wanted to plug paper street told me that if you go to their website and you use code word gender, you get, uh, 50 50% added to your, uh, added to your price.

And then if you use code word Hiller, you get $13 99 cents. So I just wanted to plug those two things. I get a little kickback on the gender one. So props to y'all. And Beaver, let's hang out in Sioux City tomorrow. I love you. Bye. Hey, will you pull up PragerU's Instagram?

I saw something so funny on there. I saw something so funny on there about gender. They're so clever over there it's so it's so sad that like so many people don't want to follow prager you because they're not religious or they're not christian and so they get turned off by that component of them and it's like guys i'm not religious or christian either it's okay uh scroll down a little bit okay click that one right there it says now do gender this is so clever so someone writes to them and tags them calling yourself a university doesn't make you a university and then they respond now do gender accidental logic calling yourself a man doesn't make you a man.

Oh, it's so good. I love that. So good. I, I hear, I hear the dumbest shit. There's this comic.

I, I, I do not watch TV unless it's UFC. I do not turn on my TV unless it's UFC or I'm watching something on YouTube just to do some research. And yesterday I was sitting down and I was sick, and I go, I'm going to go to Netflix and I'm going to watch some comedy. And I started watching this comic Aziz Ansari, and he's so bad. I don't know how anyone watches him or watches – it's not – he's so bad. Why? What's wrong with him? Because it's just – it's propaganda. It's not there he's so bad why what's wrong with him it because it's just it it's

propaganda it's not comedy it's like um it's like what's happened to uh stephen colbert or john oliver maybe it's always been like that and i just woke up but it's propaganda instead of comedy well i think it's like creeped into like just regular comedy shows like like what was the like this yeah like this logic this this lot this because i feel like for like for the long time you know still i think a majority of the comics nowadays are still pretty um like of their own opinions like they're going to create whatever whatever makes people laugh kind of stuff but i think some now you have a couple people that are starting to be more political i guess who comics yeah i think a lot

of they weren't political before no i just feel like they were they were very like abrasive they were they were able to like kind of push a norm one way or the other and people thought it was funny and they enjoyed it because that's kind of what everybody was thinking except like the government right right right i see what you're saying well one of the things he was he did this whole skit about how ice cube got a um uh colonoscopy and never askedoscopy and let them shove 12 feet of hose up his ass, but now he won't take the injection. And the disconnect there. Why all of a sudden does everyone care about this? It's just not even it's just

not even funny it doesn't even it doesn't even i i understand why the people who think it's funny want to think it's funny because they're looking for any reason to defend their ignorance any reason um but it's just it's just such sloppy humor it's not it's not tosh it's not it's not chapelle you know what i mean it's not chris rock it's it's just to defend it's just to defend their ignorance that dude got me too by the way who did aziz oh okay so and z's used to be funny no yeah i mean he would he was it was bad well i think he started off on a tv show too and that just kind of like skyrocketed his uh popularity and then i was like that's it let's can we look at stephy cohen's um instagram she's taking so this is an april fool's joke that she's taking applications have you ever had a colonoscopy no but I had a dude put his finger in my ass.

Check your prostate? No, no. Strip club in Vegas. No, no, no. I'm joking. Yeah. And not only that, he stuck his finger in my ass and then told me he needs a second opinion. I was like, dude, you like. Have to add another finger in there.

I wish it was just another dude. Damn it. it was just another dude damn it it was just another dude it's fucking i'm like okay let me see you know what's interesting about her she's cutting loose but she's not really oh i like that that's the least makeup i've seen of her i like that um her in that dress i'd like to see her just totally relaxed. Like, like just, anyway, let me see.

Let me, can I read that post? Is she taking applications for boyfriends? What are we looking at? that wasn't that. That was about being in. I mean, I'm inside you. Drop recommendations below for everything.

Collabs, gyms, restaurants. Like, okay. All right. God, LA sucks. God, LA sucks. God, LA sucks.

It's so horrible. You want to experience crazy mental illness? Yeah, well, there it is. You saw it. She's got the mask on. I think she's pretty hard. I think she's pro take drugs. I think she's pro drugs.

Pro injection. Force kids to get injections and shit. I think. I had fun with her on the podcast. We stayed away from anything touchy touchy. Um, I'm boxing. How about we go to, um,

um, best CrossFitters in the world. I was going to save this for tomorrow, but let's look at the best. I Googled best CrossFitters in the world. I was going to save this for tomorrow, but let's look at the best. I Googled best CrossFitters in the world. Um, no, no,

no, I'm not, not anymore. I was, I'm not anymore. Now I'm just sexy. No, I'm just sexy.

Uh, best. So I Googled best CrossFitters in the world. And this, this, I found this fascinating cause I didn't even know who like five of these guys were or girls, people,

uh, men's Health Magazine. Yeah. Let me see. A sports show. 10 best CrossFitters in the world. Okay. Let's scroll down.

Oh, wait. Let me read what that says really quick. Let me read what that says really quick. Athletes are usually healthy and fit, but those who pursue CrossFit as a sporting option are the people who have an extreme amount of patience and strength. CrossFit essentially is a fitness regime that was created by a person wow so that's like a robot wrote this this doesn't even make sense that sounds like ai athletes are usually healthy wow yeah that is so bad look how they spelled crossfit two words amazing this is amazing so this is just an automated okay number 10 this is crazy

zach rule we had him on the podcast that's the super yolk dude uh with no legs okay i know who that is number nine tasia purse of vez i think that's the chick who's like the mom at the Mayhem Empire. Yeah, she's Haley's coach, Tasia Persevich. Okay. I'd like to have her on the podcast. Sean Ramirez, I don't know if he still competes, but back in the day, he was like the best old dude. Yeah, he's a firefighter, isn't he? I'm not sure.

Madison Walker, have no fucking clue who you are. I don't know if she's the one on the left, the middle, or the right. Couldn't tell you. But they look like they're having fun, and the bar muscle-up's a pretty cool move. So she's the number seven. Number six, this is the first, I guess, really legit possibility. Kyle Kasperbauer, sixth best crossfitter in the world. Man, I think he's been on the podium.

I mean, he's a stud not woke uh i don't know christine on dolly uh hot as shit but never heard of her in shorts are a little short um for but oh here we go garrett fisher um number four fourth best crossfitter in the world okay i mean he's amazing but i think he's i don't know what i don't think he's in the game anymore okay let's go on i don't think he ever won the games he didn't uh genie mitchell smith i don't know if it's the top girl or the bottom girl but i have no clue let me read what it says about her at number three in this list of the top

10 best CrossFit athletes in the world. We have Jeannie Mitchell Smith. She is from South central. Oh, really? She's from South central, not South central LA and has an amazing amount of strength and patience. Oh shit.

It's the same talking points from up above somebody just put in a bunch of adjectives and ai the shit out of this oh she's she's the third best crossfitter in the world and she's 65 years old and weighs 190 pounds hey no one who's 65 should weigh 190 all right number two this guy i mean this is here we go this is a legit name this is this fucking pipe hitter albert dominique la ruche i just like it because it rhymes with douche uh let's see what it says about albert um he come currently participated with the team he's 28 5 foot 10 this dude weighs the same. This dude weighs 190. The same as that lady who's 65.

Let me tell you, if you're 65, you should not weigh 190. Less or more. I was chugging COVID a couple days ago. I'm going to tell you a funny story about pancakes, Jeff. Okay. And the number one best CrossFitter in the world. This chick, Jen Smith. I've definitely interviewed her a bunch.

Legit CrossFit athlete. Been on the demo team. She used to bang Julie Foucher's current. I don't know if she used to bang him. That's not fair to say because I was never in the room with them. She used to date that dude who got rich because his dad was the governor of Kentucky and made all that money off of, he bought Kentucky Fried Chicken, the chain, and then reinvented it. And his dad got Richard and fucking fucking god what's the guy lincoln

brown and then i heard so she used to date this guy lincoln brown now this dude lincoln brown is banging julie fouché i think that he i think he possibly interrupted julie's last relationship anyway so julie and this dude lincoln brown are together and julian lincoln brown used to be in charge of... I don't even know if they still are. Is there still a CrossFit Health? But there was CrossFit Health that was basically Greg's and Karin Thompson.

And then when Rose X came in, he put Julie in charge of it. And I heard that her and Lincoln had this scheme. I think they were behind precision care, which is the exact opposite of everything that Greg wanted to do with CrossFit health, not take money from the affiliates. And so they, what what just a big old yellow thing just coughed it up sorry and so basically yeah it's just interesting how how that loop is so tight but i guess you're gonna bang people who are in your loop right i mean sure you're gonna fuck people at your job that's i mean and at your gym and like who else are you gonna fuck it's better than going on tinder online i think meet people work out next to

them build some tension ask them out and bang them marry them have kids with them love them if you disagree with this list or would like to add some more information please leave your comments down below let's see if there are comments let's see oh wait let me see let me see what they say about the old lady she started in 2015 oh yeah what where's this even coming from yeah much more happier with

169 no 65 year old woman should weigh 190 you gotta start losing weight when you get old and get skinny. How much do CrossFit athletes make? Oh, they make 100,000. Oh, here we go. In addition to the 100,000 prize for winning the winning team,

Mayhem Freedom, the second-place finishers. It's just a mess. The writing is just a mess. It's just a mess the writing's just a mess it's just computer writing as it should you mean the boning eric as it should the boning should always there's a page that i follow that there's they do like uh who's boning who yeah box confessions and so people just it's it just slides of people saying that they're voting their coach or they're voting their coach's sister. Do you think it's real?

I'm sure half of them are not. Just people wanting to get attention. I think that 95% of dudes who get into the gym space, I would do it because they want to meet girls. Oh, for sure. Like 95% of all male coaches, I guess. Like the only one who like the only one I can think of who maybe didn't do it

in CrossFit is Max Elhaj. The training think tank guy. I can see it. I just don't see him as a sex machine. Sorry, Max. We should have him on. This, this fucking guy. I saw he's gotten into the he's they're back in the podcast space and their

numbers are giant let me see their training think tank podcast those guys need to stop they're gonna they're stealing my shit i own the internet hey bat people you you bat people go over and smash max el haj he's about to take over he's saying smart shit over there and people are watching it I hate that shit they have CTP over there do you know him? no who's that? he used to do Barbell Shrugged

he was the oh what's his tell me his real name maybe I do know him honestly I don't even know his real name when Max was on the show there was a guy there who I knew was well let's see pull up that pull up like can we pull up their youtube page yeah i saw he made a video the other day that i don't think they had made a video in forever and then all of a sudden it popped into my youtube feed and it was like 5 000 views i'm like geez yeah

that page is pretty big. Pretty big? How many subscribers do they have? The bat guy's about to just crush us. 34,000? Oh, yeah. Everyone crushes us. I think they've been around a little bit longer, though. Everyone crushes us. Okay, look at his views. Look at his

views. Look at this. This guy's killing it. Quarter finals, he got 5,900. Oh, look at that. Yeah, look at that. Sarah Sigmundsdoter, Alexis Raptus. When you hear Alexis Raptus, do you just think of dinosaurs? I immediately think of a dinosaur. Yeah, me too.

She could kind of look like one yeah look at their videos are just oh no those are all their best videos click the video button they can't be this good it's pretty good that's why yeah look at how good all their videos do their videos kill it you know why because max isn't a sex machine he's in the space to actually do work he's abstinent that's probably why he has so much energy he's got that that patrick big david energy yes no i bet max has a chick i think that's awesome yeah they do really well max el haj training think tank who who training tank think training think tank tell me about the guy tell me about the guy

really quick what was his name the guy you said ctp i don't even i don't even know i think it's like chris something go to barbell shrugs i think they have a shitload of subscribers too cpt crushes the video game i don't know what that is. Hiller is a fad. What is going to complain about after the season is over? I know. That's a, I hope not me. I hope him and the memes guy get in a fight or something. I hope he turns on,

I hope he turns on the meme guy or the morning chalk up or Tommy and Shawnee or something. Probably already got him blocked you're looking at barbell shrugged you're gonna go to that i'm trying to find cpp cam do you know what it's amazing how many of these people um used to be um, and I didn't follow. That guy, Eddie If, the comedian who has the WODcast podcast? Yeah. Arm and Hammer used to be on his podcast I just found out the other day. Oh, really?

Yeah, I didn't even know that. What happened to Arm and Hammer? Hey, let's just check everyone's accounts and see what the fuck's going on. Let's make the rest of the show that. Let's go to Barbell Shrug and see what they're doing. Here's their page. I don't know if they still do a podcast. I guess they probably do.

They got a bald dude on there. That dude when they started the show had hair probably. Let me see. They make people stronger. Wow, 635 shows. What's the date on that? Can you go to their YouTube page? Yeah. Oh, yeah. i recognize that guy damn look at that guy's chest so i recognize that guy that's one of the the bigger names on their show

yeah he's been there from the beginning i think they have if i hear it i'll know it one of their guys he like passed away a while back one of the guys on their show yeah it was like probably like five plus years ago do you know what i heard yesterday what do you know who um z.a anderson is yeah oh yeah yeah i recognize that guy on the left what's that guy's name doug larson i think oh i don't recognize his name i definitely recognize his face yeah they have 200 000 subscribers they have 206 000 subscribers we have 12 000 we're getting there and but their views don't show aren't relative look at how small their

views are people must listen to them on spotify that must be they must be huge on spotify they don't really post a whole lot of videos about anything very often okay so one of the guys on this show passed away how did he pass away i can't remember i don't want i don't really remember exactly what it was he just was like i think he was in amsterdam or something and. I don't want, I don't really remember exactly what it was. He just was like, I think he was in Amsterdam or something. And then I don't know. He just died. I don't think it was like suicide or anything.

Just took a huge bong rip and passed away. Probably. Their subs are from back in the day when they were big. Well, I bet you they're still big. Oh, Chris Moore. That's what it was.

Barbell Buddha. Oh yeah. He had a heart attack no shit heart failure yeah what was the vaccine no it was six years ago damn hey um so there's these there's these three brothers the anderson brothers they used to be big in crossfit i saw them everywhere they're all super good looking super nice and they got a dad that's super good looking super nice and he was a master's athlete and i guess in october of 2021 i didn't know this um someone sent this to me yesterday i guess za i think that's the older brother yep he looks like a movie star he's got like crazy like

crazy beautiful eyes like he's got like woman's eyes. And I guess he was with some woman. And the woman's ex-husband came into the house with a hatchet. And Z.A. capped him. Oh, shit. Yeah. Capped him dead. I feel like I heard about that.

That's crazy. I wonder if he would come on the show and tell me that story i'm dying to know the story that'd be incredible i'm so i'm tripping on the fact that he killed someone and that someone came at him with a hatchet can you imagine someone coming at you with a hatchet that's another rob somebody's house with a hatchet well i think they don't say this in the article at all. I'm completely making this up. But he was with the dude's ex-wife. Oh, okay. Yeah, so you can kind of.

All right. But still a hatchet? I picture something really crass. I picture he walked in and Zia's balls were resting on her chin or something crazy. I mean, I don't know. Speculation, speculation. It's just the way my brain works. It's just the way my brain works.

And so where was Z-A? Where was the gun? I'd stand for sure. Like where was the gun? Oh, shit. I mean, if he was staying there, probably. Mr. Rhodes, good morning. It's been a while.

Don't bring a hatchet to a gunfight. Yeah, a dude coming at you with a hatchet and you shoot him dead. Yeah, we have questions, Z.A. I would love to hear. But it's probably traumatic, too. Yeah, for sure. I was on the flight the other day, and this guy just starts telling me about how his cousin and his buddies tried to jump somebody in a parking lot.

And then the guy that tried to jump pulled out a gun and killed one of them and injured another. I was like, why would you? And they didn't even have any weapons on them. And the guy that told you that was on the jumping team? No, he was just like a cousin of the guy he's just telling me this story they're sitting next to each other did he tell you why they jumped him no they're just like oh yeah they saw a guy in parking lot and they just wanted to jump in like okay thanks for don't bring za around your girl yeah yeah yeah those dudes are so hot don't

let me tell you something it's not even those guys fault if you if you see the anderson any of those three brothers i have three sons now i get it you can't you can't take your you can't walk your wife through the panchic house and expect expect to keep her they're not gonna like that those are good christian dudes but it's the i don't know they're just the anderson brothers the smith brothers you the only girl that you're you're the only girl that's safe around three brothers is if you're around alex smith because he likes dudes other than that yeah alex smith can come to my house none of the other smith brothers are invited none of the panchik brothers none of the other Smith brothers are invited. None of the Panchik brothers. None of the Anderson brothers. Alex Smith could probably still take your wife.

For sure. And be best friends for the rest of his life. That dude might have the best body out of all nine of those dudes that I said. He moves so well too. Yeah know he's getting into like that fitness wizard stuff or at least that's what I kind of think by looking at his Instagram yeah Mark Fuentes

do we need to start posting eagles to fight off the bats when they then just count how many are left after the pod to see who won. Oh, I'm just playing. I'm just poking the bear. Hiller's a good dude. He's doing his thing.

You know what I respect about him the most? Not any of the stuff people are saying, because I really don't care about most of that stuff. any of the stuff any people are saying because i really don't care about most of that stuff like i the the only thing i care about everything i'm doing is a shtick except for the fact that i really do care that annika didn't get in and that her feelings that that it sucks for her i guess that's the woke liberal in me like i just i just don't it sucks to see people hurt that's why i don't that's why hunting's hard for me and like catching fish and seeing that shit come out of the water and i don't have a good take on it i just i have this i'm uncomfortable

with the death of the animal i'm uncomfortable with the fact that annika's not getting what she wants you know we want people to be happy it's like when you were homeless how did you get food for yourself like you didn't learn how to fish you didn't like dumpsters right waited at the market at 5 a.m when they threw out the old shit um but uh and so what i'm most impressed about about hiller is the hard work that's all i see that's really i just think, wow, this guy's getting at it. This shit ain't easy.

This shit ain't easy. Matt called me yesterday and he's like, hey, did you have to take tomorrow off? You're sick as shit. You sounded like complete ass on the podcast yesterday. I'm like, no, I cannot. I will not.

I shall not. Am I taking today off? Am I taking tomorrow off? I'm not never taking any day off. I'm in this to win this. Would Rich Froning take a today off? Am I taking tomorrow off? I'm not never taking any day off. I'm in this to win this. Would Rich Froning take a day off? Any of those days he fucking won the CrossFit games? I don't think so.

I'm good at it and I'm going to get better. And so that's what I see Hiller doing. He's good at it and he's going to get better. And he's, he's, he's, he's working his ass off. All those guys,

every single person. But there are people out there i see who have boundaries i do think if i was going to rank the hard workiness of of the crew just from just from the little bit that i know that um that at the top of the food chain is probably the buttery dudes me and and Hiller right now, just in terms of hard work. I mean, maybe there's others. I can't think of everyone, but not big enough yet,

but, but by it's, it's, it's nonstop. I'm never, ever, ever, ever not ask Caleb how many times a day I fucking text them or

it's just nonstop. You know, that alert that you said your mom got saying like hey do you want to turn off these notifications yeah i get that like every day from me really from like our group chat yeah oh that's crazy that's awesome and we're not fucking around it's like shit to do it's like we're not it's not like oh my god did you see the tits on this girl or look at this cheetah eating this dog it's like no it's not like that it's only like once a week those yeah yeah yeah the buttery dudes man man man man when you see people putting out content every day they're working they're working stuff out alec does on

the rings is insane yeah i think we're i think at some point we're gonna have him come on the show and he fell through the cracks but oh yeah that was a while back like an emily rolf moment and the editing it's not just it's not they have to those marzen and he all those guys that's the thing about um uh and i'll say this about hillar too when if you do any editing you know that Hiller video has 5000 cuts in it like he has that's tedious shit

in like 20 different layers yeah in Hebrew margin I have like 20 different layers their shit's nuts their shit is absolutely nuts um Savon what do you want on that you can't get who do you want on that you can't who oh who do i want in the podcast i can't get you know who i'd like on the podcast who i

don't know if i can't get them but i haven't got them i'd like to interview jake paul that'd be interesting yeah i think i think we would have fun either i'd love i'd love to um interview um colby covington uh anyone that i think is misunderstood i'd like to interview i'd like to interview biden that would be weird you think he's misunderstood i mean i would just like to drill down with him on some things i don't think anyone like that i don't think it's you you know what was interesting about christian harris and and zach bitter

both of them, when I would ask them questions, they wouldn't answer the questions, which is fine. Sometimes who knows if they remember the question or they got distracted. I do that all the time. Someone asked me how old I am. And I start talking about the importance of being a Pisces.

You know what I mean? It's like, you just, you, you, you know what I mean? It just connects like your birth date to then this, and then you don't answer the question.

Um, You know what I mean? It just connects like your birth date to then this, and then you don't answer the question. But sometimes it's important for the interviewer to stay focused and, and to, and to, and to just really drill down, to really drill down. I don't know. I, we, I'd have to find out. I'd have to find out. I'd have to find out. I'd have to find out all those people though at the, well, here's one, one, one way. I think a lot of the, I don't think people realize how hard everyone's working. I don't think they, they even have the slightest, uh,

I don't think they have the slightest inkling. They think that people are in just sit there and read. They think of famous people just reap the rewards of their hard work, but they don't really most. I think most people are just working hard and they don't get to reap the rewards. The perfect example is this. And I told the story the other day when I was overseas, there were people talking about how they wanted to come to the United States. And I was thinking, they have no idea that the vast majority of people in the United States end up getting a loan at 30 years old. It's a 30 year

mortgage. And then they work the rest of their life to pay it off. And when they're 67, it's finally paid off because they refinanced it once and their life's over, but they own a house now. They're fat, and the only thing they can speak of is the 10 cruises they've been on where they just stuffed their faces on the cruise. It's like, that's a shitty life. That is a shitty life. Buttery Bros are working on their storytelling in their shows and I like

it they're adding in voiceovers etc tell more than your story I think it's awesome I'm uh to be honest with you I don't know they're I only watch their shows when they are going to have guests on when I have guests on who've been on their show and every time I watch them I'm always like

shockingly surprised i don't know why of how good they are um but but i would like to see them do something i heber's crazy talented and i'm not saying that marston's not crazy talented but i'd love to see heber do something out of out of the space he's a trippy cat too he's a trippy cat like when i knew him he's straight isn't he straight as an arrow i'd like to see him do something that's not straight as an arrow like like a john wick but with a shitload of nudity wasn't there a lot of nudity in john w Wick already is there I feel like there was I don't know

I want to make a I want to make a movie I should make a movie there should be nudity there should be nudity in every scene did you ever see Bad Lieutenant with Harvey Keitel no there's a

there's a director's cut I don't know where you get it but there's a scene when he's just high as fuck on heroin and he's naked it's all it's actually harvey kytel naked and he's yoked out of his mind i had no idea so he's juiced to the gills right i'm sure he juiced up for the role and there's just cock in it and i just thought wow what a great scene you don't see a lot of cock in movies looks like you can get on amazon prime i should right i should i need to reach out to him i don't know much about him i don't i used to i used to go out with a girl in high school named sarah sarah schellenberg sarah schellenberg i used used to, and then, you know, what's crazy is my current wife had this boyfriend

and I wanted to get with her so bad for five years. And my, and my wife, Haley would be like, nah, nah, get your hands off me. Stay away. And she always like kept me away. And then one day she said to me, she came to me and she goes, Hey, I broke up with my boyfriend after five years. And I ran over to this chick, Sarah, who I was dating at after five years and i ran over to this chick sarah who i was dating at the time like literally ran over to her like 100 yards away or whatever and i said hey i'm breaking up with you and this chick sarah was this super fucking hot blonde chick who went to uc santa barbara insane body and i was a homeless dude and you know what she said to me when i said i'm gonna break i want to break up with you she goes you're breaking up with me it was awesome i'm like yeah i know it's probably stupid

and then i've been with my wife pretty much ever since yeah crazy that's awesome yeah if i would have been with her i'd have a little fucking german armenian kids instead i'm with the ajkenazi jew i'm telling you if you can get an ajkenazi jewish chick i don't care what you are you get one it's so good it's so good the kids turn out so good um dude you guys would be two peas in a pod talking about drug addicts in california but he's actually going to try and make change in california what i mean but you mean and because but would imply that i'm not making change anthony tony but he's actually going to try and make change in california i want him to get elected and i'm from oregon you're a good dude wow you're from oregon you're not a good dude but other than

that i appreciate it okay i'm gonna i'm gonna get off the air now and dm him what are'm going to get off the air now and DM him. What are you going to do today, Caleb? Probably go shoot some guns. With parents? Yeah, probably. What are you going to do? I'm going to go to the beach. It's 8 in the morning here, but I can see out my window that it's blue skies.

Perfect. Yeah, I'm probably going to take the boys to go hit some tennis balls and I will go to the beach and let them ride their skateboards up at the top on the path and then I'll get them throw their suits on and we'll go in the water. Sebon is making change in California. He's sponsored by

California Hormones. Ah, yes. Thank you. Hey, I need to tell the owner of california hormones i need to talk to her this friend of mine wants to get all um he wants to get on uh testosterone replacement therapy and um i am gonna dm schellenberger and um and he wants to do a whole video series on it he wants to get all just like see what happens like follow a day by day this dude's cool as shit get me on some too would you do that probably not right now how old are you 26 i'm yeah i'm scared i'm scared

i'm never messing with my hormones. You're already too juiced up, huh? No, I just, what if I become emotional? What if I become emotionally unstable? Sometimes. You aren't already? No, that's the one thing I'm so emotionally stable. I'm reading my YouTube comments right now.

God, I love comments. God, I love comments. God, I love comments. I think all the comments that we've gotten all together in an entire, that's another thing. I'm so jealous of all these guys. These guys, everyone gets so many comments. You look on the Batman's YouTube and he's just, he got more comments on one video than i even like negative comments i just want comments just talk about me i just bathed in that shit he got he got

he got more comments in one video than we have on all our videos combined have you seen the all inclusive ads from google no i have not i don't even know what that means all inclusive i mean you're scaring me i don't see really any i know i haven't seen them yet unless they make it to instagram and someone's making fun of one of them um nick mclellan i seven you emotionally stable seven i think there's a comment there you emotionally stable yes i have a super high emotional iq that is why um you you have to be in order to not be offended that's the whole thing people people who get offended are emotional retards what is an ashkenazi jew uh just they're the group of people the ingrained group of people on the

planet who have a uh iq that's a standard deviation higher than the other and they fuck based they think sexy is smart they fuck based on smartness i made all that up but but that's why that's my understanding of it you know ar, Armenians, you've seen Armenians. We got a, what's our girl's name? The super hot girl with all the sisters. The Kardashians. Armenians bang for butt size and Jews bang for brain size. And so they've, in the end, brain size wins.

It's weird. And so they just kept banging for brain and brain and brain. It's weird. And so they, they just kept banging for brain and brain and brain. And they got this group of people that are very, very smart and very, very hardworking. They did,

you know, you know, like that, you know, like the Jesus lizard was bred so much that it can stand up and two legs and run on water. Like that shit just happens. Just keep,

keep it in the family long enough. You catch one of those. I never caught one. No, I cannot. I'm not a scientist. Not a biologist. I can't share that with any woman. Sexist, sexist. All right, guys.

Thank you so much. Sorry about the UFC fighter not showing up. Matthew Semelsberger. He's a great guy. No hard feelings. I'm still going to do the live call-in show tomorrow i do want to tell you that we have some incredible guests coming up um let me see if i can find them on my calendar here uh no i can't oh oh yeah so we have con porter coming up. We have Yevgeny from the Ukraine. Tomorrow we have a live call-in show in the morning.

Later on on Monday, we have a power ranking show with Brian Friend. Who else do we have on? I'm really excited about so many of our guests we're having on. Nick Palladino is coming up on the 5th. Oh, yeah. Nick Palladino is coming up. That's awesome. He used to train with angelo

um he was he was kind of the great hope of crossfit right let's talk about him being the next razor uh we have uh uh dr trevor cashew coming on uh on the sixth michael easter said he's a genius with an iq 160 we shall see um if i can dumb him down with my i. Thursday the 7th, I don't see anyone. Friday the 8th, I – oh, Friday the 8th, we have Dr. Stan coming on. So we got some doctors coming on. Bring up the IQ of the show. Yep, going to raise it a bit. Can't wait to get your wife on.

Oh, I want to – I have a guy coming on April 12th. His name is Justin Nunley. Can we pull up his Instagram real quick? Justin, just like it sounds, Nunley is N-U-N-L-E-Y. N-U-N-L-E-Y. Justin Danger Nunley. I will not be having any of my family members on the show. You bringing the plumber to unclog that nose.

Is it this guy? Yeah, yeah, yeah, scroll down a little bit You're gonna have him on? Yeah, do you know who this guy is? Yeah, yeah So, before we click on anything I want to tell you, scroll down a little bit Back to the top, sorry, back to the top The reason why I'm having him on is because of this

The one in the middle He got in a car accident And instead of fighting with these people, he made friends with them. That's how I would handle it. That's how I would handle it. I would make the situation so different than how it's supposed to go.

I would not let it go the way... Nothing should go the way it's supposed to go. I will, I would not let it go the way it, nothing should go the way it's supposed to go. Okay. But let's click on one of his let's watch a couple of his, his clips. Let's watch the one where, where he's rubbing the vagina, but it's go down a little bit more, more there on the left. That one. Yeah. Oh, it was a man's neck. Jesus, fix it.

Listen, did you know that New Zealand's badminton team named themselves the Black Cocks but received so many complaints they had to change the name? Now you do. I love this shit. Okay, let's click another one. How is this guy so good? This should be a whole show.

I really should have went to church on Sunday. Listen, did you know that the Spanish version of when pigs fly is when hens piss? Now you do. Those are hilarious. I love them. What are the steps of a cold? I had a sore throat. Then it went away and I had side sinuses

and now I'm coughing. Does that seem like the right evolution over three days? That's it. Like after that, probably tomorrow, you'll just be a little congested and it'll be over. Okay'm gonna tell you this at the end of the show when no one's

listening you ready ready last week the the day prior to me getting my cold was the fourth day in a row i ate pancakes and i probably haven't had pancakes in two years oh no oh no who said oh no i said oh no um so i so i i had every morning i saw a friend of mine was in town and we went out to eat and we went to this breakfast joint and i ordered a jalapeno omelet and two pancakes and i ate that every morning for four days and i put on i went up to 176 pounds i'm little like 176 is huge for me and um and then i got sick weird yeah it's probably the most sugar and carbs i've had like in the last two years combined you lather the syrup on there oh shit nick well good thing i'm emotionally stable your You're terminal. So everybody thinks when I say they get a cold.

All right, guys. Thank you, Caleb. You're fucking life savers. Life savers. Life savers. Thanks for coming on.