The Sevan Podcast - #477 - Tony Blauer

Episode Date: July 6, 2022

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Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Make your nights unforgettable with American Express. Unmissable show coming up? Good news. We've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it. Meeting with friends before the show? We can book your reservation. And when you get to the main event, skip to the good bit using the card member entrance.
Starting point is 00:00:19 Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamex. Benefits vary by card. Other conditions apply. Bam, we're live. I'm live. No Tony Blauer yet.
Starting point is 00:00:38 I am lucky. I'm a lucky man. I don't know why I'm saying that, but I am. Good morning, y'all. Yes. Yes. Kyle. Yes.
Starting point is 00:00:50 Where are you from? I know I've asked you that before. Where are you listening from? Bruce Wayne. Kyle. Good morning. Mr. Blower. What's up, dude?
Starting point is 00:00:59 Mr. Blower. Good morning. How are you, man? Good. Is it on the right camera i i have like uh enormous um delusions of grandeur and and aspirations but why i don't know because it's fun but but but on the other hand if i just wake up and like take a shit which is like almost every morning i'm that's like enough for me wow today's a great day i did it i'm ready just to go on
Starting point is 00:01:27 cruise control the rest of the day even though like i'm like yeah i want to do all this this but i'm just i'm kind of a simple man too yeah yeah just this the small things the small thing do you like this like like a drawer full of clean underwear makes me feel like a king like i don't need an army the um did you write this intro no i just thought of it just now it's it's um it's very stream of consciousness um i have one of those yeah but in all seriousness i like things like that too like i can if i see something just done right, like a clean, you know, like, like I've been training Jesse to, you know, how to fold my underwear for like 20, 25 years.
Starting point is 00:02:17 So recently she got it right. And I appreciate that. I see my underwear drawers clean and you're like, yeah. Who's Jesse, your. Is Jessie your mistress? Who's that? Jessie is, well, I have a wife named Jessie, but I do have a mistress named Jessie, too. Smooth. Ladies and gentlemen, take note of that.
Starting point is 00:02:35 That's some CIA shit. It's the same name. You call your wife's name out accidentally, and it's the mistress name, or the mistress name, you never, you're totally safe totally safe they'll never watch this show so we're safe i was thinking of ways we were we were different this morning what's new man how are you i'm good i like this overhead camera angle you have you do yeah it's just a camera sitting on a big monitor up there yeah but i know it's like it's kind of like uh it makes you feel like like like some like famous radio host
Starting point is 00:03:11 or something i am i'm five years i'm five years the world is catching up i read that in the patrick bed david book you have to like see yourself like five years ahead like you have to see yourself five years ahead of where you are and then the rest of the world is kind of just catching up. It was in the 90s. I cannot remember this guy's name. Independent filmmaker. He said, if you take your space, the world must make place for you. Oh.
Starting point is 00:03:41 Isn't that heavy? Oh. If you take your place, the world must make space for you i read that and it really it had a profound impact on me and uh some of the trials and tribulations of developing and growing my business yeah i i really really really really like that that's smoother than the way i said it you know saying things smoother in the future thank you good yes applicable everywhere when i was in the shower this morning i um i uh as i was finishing up and thinking okay i'm going to be on the air in 25 minutes with tony i turn the water off and i look around and there's no towels
Starting point is 00:04:22 hanging in the bathroom anywhere right and i don't and i don't have my own towel like i always just use whatever towels there it's usually my kids towels because i have three boys who shower in that bathroom too so it's usually just one of their leftover i was like i bet you tony has his own towel but he doesn't use like just some fucking towel that's just hanging around i bet you have your own shower probably i i have my own shower and my own towel and i have actually a maiden who bathes me i don't believe that but you do have your you do have your own bathroom right and you're i have my own sink uh well you have a bathroom yeah i have a bathroom but just dude five years from now you'll have your own bathroom yeah is that's just part of having five-year-olds?
Starting point is 00:05:06 Like you just. No, that's just, that's Patrick David Bedard. Oh, right. Visualize the bathroom too. How do you like your Yeti cup? Thank you. This is my, so I got the sponsor Paper Street Coffee, and this was the first cup he ever gave me to advertise the coffee.
Starting point is 00:05:21 No, I was in a Yeti store yesterday. Oh. I saw the Yeti sign on there, and I bought a, I should have used it, coffee i didn't know i was in a yeti store yesterday but we can probably i saw the yeti sign on there and i i bought a i should have used it or i didn't i brought this for your show it's perfect hey these cups are so much fucking better than the other insulated cups the yetis i have other insulated cups their shit actually is better yeah keeps everything colder and hotter do you have any of the shit knockoff cups? Yeah, and I just bought a bunch yesterday. I guess my maiden didn't wash them yet.
Starting point is 00:05:49 You're going to regret it. You bought the Yeti ones or the shit knockoff ones? Yeti, Yeti, Yeti. Oh, yeah, yeah. You're going to regret it. Yeah. So I interrupted you. Do you remember what you were saying?
Starting point is 00:06:00 I just – well, then when I'm done using one of their – I always do this too. I don't know where I was going with it. I only have a few notes here, only two pages. I just, well, then, then when I'm done using that with one of their, I always do this too. I don't know where I was going with it. I don't want, I only have a few notes here, only two pages. So I'm afraid if once I start using my notes, the show's coming to an end. It's, it's, so I'm just trying to bullshit for how long is this show? Uh, if you're good, it can go over an hour. If I think your ass. Okay.
Starting point is 00:06:20 Fuck. I watched two of your podcasts that you did the other day. Okay. You've been on some podcasts with some lazy motherfuckers. They let you talk for an hour and a half. I realized I interrupt people because if I don't, I feel like I'm being lazy. Like, like I interrupt people to show you that I'm listening. It's interesting. And I think it's a certain skill. And I mean, you may be interrupting because you're rude. I mean, you're just in generally you have no filter. So there's that. But yeah, a lot of I mean, I don't know which ones you did. And we don't need to mention names and how old they are or how recent they are the um i just did one with a couple of guys from the uk and uh they really did their homework and it was it was it was fun when there was questions and people are listening and uh it was more of a conversation and you realize oh we recorded the conversation yeah i uh yeah when you're when you're two hour two and a half hours in and you're like
Starting point is 00:07:25 holy shit we've been talking for two and a half hours it's magical flow state flow state flow flow state I have something I want to
Starting point is 00:07:34 show you are you on a computer I am it's weird when I do podcasts with people on their phone I almost find it rude but I'm not big time enough to find it or like they're in their car
Starting point is 00:07:43 driving around right and i'm like okay i i see i see where you made a lot of time for me i see i'm on the way to starbucks let's do the podcast yes yes but if they're big time you just kind of just got to suck it up and um go yeah so so this isn't tony blauer's instagram i'm going to show you. It's a guy named Ray Cash Share. Cash Care. You say it the way you want. I'll use his name, but we can use your pronunciation.
Starting point is 00:08:13 Go ahead. And it looks like it's at a seminar. Yeah. And the video quality is not up to my standard, but there's a man standing here on his right who looks pretty buff, and he's going to come across the room where Tony is standing with Michael Chandler, the amazing Bellator and now UFC super stud. So Cash is his middle name. It's Ray Care, and he's a former SEAL, retired SEAL. and uh this is a new specialty course tony is teaching um uh how to be successful with the only fans page and i wanted to show you um wow oh so what is going on here it's it's a a break at the end of uh one of the training sessions we're at this uh event called operation
Starting point is 00:09:05 black site and it's uh it was pretty cool uh event where uh people were taught the attendees were taught cqb and shooting with tim kennedy teaching that uh me michael chandler were running uh combatives or i was i was taking uh mma uh concepts and applying it for to the street we also taught uh knife defense gun defense um and um mindset shit and also it was a big seminar like a three-day event and this is during one of the breaks yeah this is uh this might be on the last the last day at the end of some stuff or i don't remember it's obviously a break and is mr care an attendee no no he's one of the instructors one of the instructors there okay so he's taking you're already on the map but he decides to come on the map yeah okay because he was he was to use another he was
Starting point is 00:10:01 teaching another iteration. And what is he, it's during a break and he just wants to tussle with Michael a little bit just for shitting giggles? He's, like a lot of these guys, you know, they want to feel stuff. So Ray was there doing the shooting stuff with Tim Kennedy. And he wanted to, I guess he wanted to feel what's it like to just, you know, pummel or lock up with Mike Chandler, you know, like a world-class MMA guy, you know? He wanted to feel something. He wanted to feel something. And a lot of guys, it's funny how a lot of guys will do that. They just, it's just uh it's like a magnet
Starting point is 00:10:48 they're not even thinking like like you even have a chance the guy's like a world class you're gonna like what are you gonna do and then it's it's really awkward for because i've seen this happen many times it's it's awkward for the this athlete because they're playing they can't go hard it's it's an interesting dynamic it's like if you're someone's house and they got like a sword a ming dynasty store sword or if they're a uh you want to pick it up or if like you go to dave's house and like i've never touched a gun in my life and he opens it even though i own some and he opens his safe and i'm just like i just want to touch all the guns and point them at everyone. He's like, no. Right.
Starting point is 00:11:27 It's kind of like that. Right. Except this guy. This guy was a SEAL. Yeah. This guy. This guy's a SEAL. Retired SEAL.
Starting point is 00:11:33 And Mike, of course, is a current badass. And he just wanted to fuck around with him, you know. Who's tougher, a SEAL or a white belt? The SEAL at the zoo or the Navy SEAL? I just like comparing apples and oranges. Is a SEAL equal to a blue belt, Mr. Blower? Okay, here we go. So that's Tony on the left.
Starting point is 00:11:58 He's the teacher, dude. And then next to him is the famous MMA guy. And then on the right, kind of like slithering in. Right. Is the seal. And now Chandler knows something's up. He knows. He's right.
Starting point is 00:12:12 He steps out. And are you feeling uncomfortable at this point, Tony? You're like, come on. Come on, Ray. No, I mean, I've seen guys get fucked up. Like, not really, really bad, but I've seen guys. So a lot of it, like, Mike Chandler's a really, really sweet, good human. There are other guys in boxing and martial arts and MMA that,
Starting point is 00:12:44 it's not that they're not sweet, but they'll go right away and they'll take you down and mount you and choke you out. And Mike's not like that. Like he's got a big smile on his face right now, and he's trying to dissuade Ray. He doesn't want to do this. He was also nursing.
Starting point is 00:13:01 He had a fight coming up, and he was rehabbing something, and he didn't want to fuck around with anybody as well so there was like some real trepidation trepidation boys are so cool have you ever seen women do what we're about to women just don't i love these i love these videos i don't know if you've seen these videos on instagram of like these macho guys and like this big buff guy will just go over and put his head on another man's lap who's like sitting down eating his lunch in a park. And the man who sets his head on his lap is just like, just keeps eating or we'll feed him some just dudes are just cool.
Starting point is 00:13:32 Like real dudes. You know what I mean? Like we just, you ever seen two, two women do this? Like you're up there with like Kayla Harrison and another chick's like, here, let me feel you.
Starting point is 00:13:41 Right. It's a, it's, it's an interesting thing i don't know about the examples you gave but the uh but but like we just have a broad breath we like really cool dudes confident cool dudes have a broad depth of intimacy from like from like hugging other dudes to just tussling with random dudes to like we're just not we're just open yeah yeah there's a camaraderie we have amongst our penises our cock and balls that just i just can't explain it that i feel like the rest of the world wants to take away from us
Starting point is 00:14:10 well that's happening for sure right but uh i i don't know i'd i'd have to i'd have to um i'd like to sit in a session with you and your therapist and just listen to you discuss this intimacy thing with men. Because we're blurring a line here. I've never had another man put his head down on my lap while I continue eating my fucking tofu salad. I just have a broader, I have a larger palate than you, Mr. Blower. Apparently. I have a larger palate. Is Chandler telling him about his injury now? Like, hey, no.
Starting point is 00:14:58 He's going, I think so, yeah. He's not saying it in those many words because it's you don't like to reveal the Achilles heel. Yeah. He's not saying it in those many words. Cause it's, it's you don't like to reveal the Achilles heel. Right. We just had a friend blow out his Achilles tendon. Did you hear about it? No.
Starting point is 00:15:15 Yeah. Who? I shouldn't say on here. I don't know if he wants everyone to know. I'll tell you afterwards. Okay. Playing basketball. Ooh. Yeah. And you know what what he thought it just like everyone else he thought that you know that that when your achilles tendon blows out you think
Starting point is 00:15:33 someone threw something at you or someone kicked you or tripped you you always hear that story right like a runner in baseball is like oh fuck the ball hit me and everyone's like not your heel your heel blue or like this guy thought someone kicked him in the back of the leg and tripped him. Awful. Yeah. Have you had that injury? Achilles tendon blowout? No.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Sounds like a bad one, right? Yeah, yeah. I'd rather lose a testicle. No, no, no. I'd rather lose a head. None. Okay, so someone's hat came off. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:05 I think Ray threw his hat off. Okay, so that's... Or Michael. Yeah, I think Ray threw his hat off. Okay, so that's getting serious. I'm a dude. Now he's got Ray's arm. Ray was going to try to grab his leg or something. Now Tony sees something either he likes or he doesn't like so tony's now about to insert i've is do you want to know what's going on in my mind there please the um uh ray's gonna get snapped down on his face no i i was i actually got nervous because i didn't know um i didn't know if ray was going to do something and I didn't want Mike to get
Starting point is 00:16:46 injured and not that he can't protect himself right but I was like should I like start like like because he was like no come on man like and then and then and then all of a sudden not my heart started to race because there's about I think 15 or 20 people watching on the left um and that changes the energy right well it it i knew what i was about to do and i was like okay like i don't know ray that well i mean the guys that like a navy seal is instructor uh we've known each other for for years but he calls me coach and he's just you know because of my work in the combatives community but we're not we haven't hung out a lot yet at this point so so what i'm about to demo is a big leap in intimacy as i like to see now i want everyone to remember just a few moments ago tony blower said he wouldn't put his head on another man's lap and i just want to let
Starting point is 00:17:42 you know that like it's okay that that's what this show's about it's about exploring um going going into the unknown therapy yes yes the other day so my kids don't go to school because i don't want them to learn anything and the other day i said a swear word at the house and my kid goes uh uh you know if you swear you're not going to go to heaven i'm like who told you that and he's like so and so and it's some fucking four-year-old kid in his jujitsu class that if you swear you don't go to heaven look right at my kid and i go i am god that was done that's it that's it he's like so you go no matter what i go no matter what because wow that's awesome all right all right here we go back in position, get back in the exact same position. So now Tony, Tony saw something he liked or didn't like.
Starting point is 00:18:29 And you're here to give instruction, right? You told Michael Chandler to get back in position. Yeah. I want to Ray to get back into position where he had his head down and, and he was, he was getting ready for a double leg or something. And who's the guy filming over there? Just one of the guys at the, one of the guys one of the attendees and this changes all the dynamics now right like like ray doesn't want to get slammed on the ground chandler probably don't want to get
Starting point is 00:18:54 slammed on the ground right and yeah and and he knows me you can start to see some of the people moving around because they think i'm about to like a lot of these guys just went through some serious combatives some gun disarmed stuff with me, so they think I'm about to show some cool move. And Michael Chandler's commented, ha, ha, ha, I was scared to death. Stay in that position. Watch this. Hey, you totally disarmed the situation. It's one of the ways to get out of certain moves is to ram your cock in somebody. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:19:38 I show this playing around with my good friend, Tony Blower, who was rattling my head to try to figure out and remember how we met. And you think that maybe this is just fun or this is just guys, but here's the fucking point. The other day I saw a video of an ethics professor who was fired from Columbia University, Peter Boghossian, on campus at another university. And he was trying to talk to people about the definition of men and women. And a group of sociologists surrounded him in like a violent manner saying that even the discussion of what's the difference between men't even really fucking know each other. Who are quote unquote violent by nature. They can joke around at the fucking highest fucking level. And if you didn't, if you thought for a second that Ray was offended by that or triggered by that, well, think twice. This fucking guy put it on his Instagram account to show Tony, another man joking around about having anal with
Starting point is 00:20:46 them. That people, yeah. Look how upset I am. I'm like, what? We're stopped. Um, I was done. Such a better life. We live not being offended. We live such a better life. We are so happy. We're so free. That's what you call egoless. That's what you call respecting humanity. That's what you call respecting the magic. That's like what you call seeing that these are just people having connections. This is the way some men, this is the way we love on each other. I call Tony and hang up five times and then I'm, and then, and then text him, Hey, I think something's wrong with your phone. When I know it's just me fucking with them. It's just, uh, it it's it's me telling him i like him
Starting point is 00:21:27 the same way i i pulled the girl's hair in kindergarten leave us alone right go ahead tony what are you gonna say no it's a great it's a great rant and here's an interesting thing is is uh when uh somebody sent that to ray obviously I wasn't filming and he wasn't filming. Somebody, you know, there were like a bunch of people filming. But society is so scared, right? So somebody sent it to him. Ray actually called me and said, hey, do you mind if I post that? Common courtesy, just common courtesy. Sure.
Starting point is 00:22:02 You know, your digital fingerprint online do you mind if i post you're like this you know uh alleged macho combatives guy like the like you don't want to see this isn't good for you i said fuck i would love you to post that you're right like you know so um you bring up that was a great rant what you did there it's so i i get i get fucking crazy with the shit going on it drives i can't consume it it's just annoying it's it's up and none of it was even planned i didn't know any where any of it was going my talk but because i just liked the video when i saw the video i just wanted to show it and i thought it would be fun to hear you talk about it but it always just ends up there because that's
Starting point is 00:22:40 kind of where i'm at in my headspace right now i just want i just want my boys to be free and have the space to play like we play but you said something that i think the most potent part of that is is is this this is more fun the like worrying about offending you know and you've got to and it's funny because we've known each other, I think we met 2006-ish or 7, you know, through. You were probably teaching one of the specialty, like that one hour specialty thing at the end of an L1 with Greg or something, like the Sunday morning. I was rattling my brain to try to remember how I met you. it was, I mean, it was early, early, early on in there, but, um, but I always, and it was one of the reasons I think that, uh, you and Jesse, uh, not my mistress, my wife, um, hit it off is like, she's got no filter. You have no filter. You guys just,
Starting point is 00:23:51 you, you see stuff and there's no, there's no moment. Like, should I say this? Should I ask this? And it's a very, it's a wonderful curiosity. It's not my brain moves too fast. I go, I'm not going to fucking say that. I'll try and figure this out. I'm going to Google this. You know, but no, it's fascinating. And the rant, listen back to it, because it was, you were in that flow state there. And it's, you know, we back to it. Cause it was, it was, you were in that flow state there and it's you know, we have more fun.
Starting point is 00:24:07 It's just because there's like, there's a freedom to improvise, a freedom to explore. And what happens if I don't get offended, everyone gets offended. So, so if I call Tony, let's say in three hours, I call Tony, this is mine and Tony's relationship. He would answer, I'm in a meeting and then hang up. And some people would be offended by that. I'm flattered by that.
Starting point is 00:24:31 Holy fuck. He took two seconds to tell me he's a meeting and hung up on me. Right. Like, cause that's what I would do to someone. I really like someone who was like on the B team. I just hang up on, I don't, I don't even answer. Yeah. It's just the story.
Starting point is 00:24:46 It's the story you tell yourself. And we live man with so many people who are so easily offended i i should have spotted it like five or ten years ago when i saw these people it was among the younger crossfit athletes who were coming up and you know i was in my 30s then and they were in their 20s and i would see the relationships they have with their girlfriends and the fact that if you don't text someone back in three hours they get mad i was like holy shit interesting it's like imagine having a leash on you i just i'm looking at your name at savan matosian and i'm looking at my name tony and i just realized i've moved just it must be because i'm on your show and it's that next level I'm now like at Drake Madonna Prince like no last name anymore I just I'm just going by my first name from now on I'm going to uh I'm gonna see if I can fix that wow uh are you are you yeah you're your shadow
Starting point is 00:25:40 band too wow yeah I knew you were but it's it's always it's always a shock i try i try to comment on a lot of your posts because i still want to fight your kid and i can't i can't comment um on you what is your um man you don't even pop up in my auto populate what is your instagram at tony blower just one word yeah it won't even. Oh, shit. And there's a Tony Blower underscore, too. Is that you also? It's a fake account. Selling crypto.
Starting point is 00:26:12 It's not even you? No. They did a pretty good job, eh? Yeah. Wow. Lots of people reporting it. Instagram doesn't think there's a problem with it. They're not violating any of our our terms that's what that was their answer uh the guy's contacting people through whatsapp trying to sell them crypto
Starting point is 00:26:32 my my my wife's not gonna like this story i apologize the other day my wife comes into the into the room um and she goes hey i'm on with um amazon support they said i just bought an iphone 13 i go oh give me your phone i'll fucking kill you if you call she's like what am i amazon support's never gonna call you right she's like holy shit like what she's like i get five of these a day and i never fall for one i go yeah it only takes one right uh i got i got one a couple years ago that i fell for this is the watsonville courthouse we have a court date set for you that's the courthouse that's the courthouse just you know 20 miles from me i'm like no shit they're like
Starting point is 00:27:14 yeah someone's pressing charges on you on a hit and run and i was like like we uh the lawyers here and like and next thing i know i'm calling the out Watsonville Courthouse. They're like, dude, you're being punked. But that's subtle, like that one. Yeah. Because. And it got my heart going. Of course. Why would you think that wasn't real?
Starting point is 00:27:39 The other stuff, people should know they're getting fished. But what a bunch of. Like, what type of person are you that just that's your I got this idea today. I'm going to start the scam business and fucking scam people. People suck, man. When they call, I can tell they're in call centers and they're just one of 500. Like, holy shit. This is a fucking like legit operation right right in 1985 you started blower tactical
Starting point is 00:28:13 crazy that i got a business name that had my same name last, that was so fortuitous. That's 37 years ago. Yeah. And I'm going to take this somewhere. Feel free to stop me anywhere if you want to fill in details along the way. But sort of the premise of this, of your system, is to weaponizing the startle flinch. is to weaponizing the startle flinch. So we all have a startle flinch. And basically, how can you turn that into something to protect yourself or to get yourself out of a bad situation before it happens?
Starting point is 00:28:54 Yeah. Do you want me to jump in? And the classes are about connecting fear and aggression. That's the training. Yeah, feel free. Jump in, yes. Well, just to put some context around. and aggression um uh that's the training yeah feel free jump in yes well just the just just to put some context around so your startle flinch is part of our survival reflex uh almost you know
Starting point is 00:29:13 every everyone has unless there's some sort of like injury to your brain or something and you don't relate to fear or the anticipation of danger or fear uh you'll flinch and it could be a spider snake somebody behind you know you're reading and then suddenly you realize when you waved your hand like that this word fuck fear appeared yeah i got the lighting oh shit yes he bought that for me wow do you know that you can't i thought that was something your computer was doing you had subliminally put that because when you lean forward at just the exposure so that vanishes trying to figure out yeah certain days genius genius certain days of the um certain time of the day the lighting's really cool yeah that's a good gift you when she gave you that you weren't
Starting point is 00:30:00 like that's too strong sorry i can't do that. Well, just having the word fuck. Yeah. Yeah. You know, what's interesting is, so we've got, I'll get you back on track by the way to start a flinch, but, but yeah, tell me about this fuck thing. And, and, and my middle name is tangent. So I got it too. You know that. Tony tangent blower. Right. The, um, um, so I turned from our whole No Fear program, we created a pretty fucking cool acronym for Fuck Fear. And it's face it, understand it, control it, know it. F-U-C-K. You know what an acronym is, Sivan, right? I do. I do.
Starting point is 00:30:43 So fuck fear, face it, understand it, control it, know it. And when I launched the no fear workshops several years ago, our first big gig was in New York city and we had no fear shirts, K-N-O-W, not N-O, K-N-O-W, fear and fuck fear shirts. And someone had given me the idea. It was Jesse and she goes, let's print fuck fear shirts. And I was like, yeah. And then I'm like, we can't do that.
Starting point is 00:31:16 We can't, I can't print fuck fear and have, and like, you know, at the time I was like 57, 58 launching another part of the business. That was just uncool. Jesse's like as a necklace, you know, that says, you know, fuck you on her necklace. It's tiny. If you lean in, I love your your neck i would say it says fuck you right and she's got you've seen the shirts you you know her she's she's the the female equivalent of of you in many ways um and uh um i said to her we can't do this. She said something like, don't be a pussy and print them. And I was like, oh, fuck. We printed a bunch of them.
Starting point is 00:31:49 These are like, I had like Wall Street people at this thing. People have been following my system for years. It wasn't just like knuckle. The Fuck Fear shirt sold out. Wow. People wanted, they want that like underneath. And they might say yeah i can't wear this out or i'm not going to show my you know this but i want to work out i want to train it
Starting point is 00:32:10 i'll mow the yard in it and i'll get braver and braver right and yeah yeah to wear it yeah i totally i have shirts like that but but it was funny where where she got this i i guess i had been been acclimated a little bit from from the uh you know the fuck fear shirt but when i when i got it i was like i loved it but it's like can i have that in my office i went through that it's it's it's a little bit it's a little bit of what you were talking about earlier but not the censorship and the social justice bullshit is just our own censorship. What, what do I want? What's my, what's my messaging? You know do we, do we want little kids, you know, to see this? And I remember Nick who's 31 now, which is insane to me, my boy.
Starting point is 00:33:06 one now uh which is insane to me my boy um i remember when he's in a car seat of my car we're driving and he's maybe five or six years old savant and uh some guy cuts me off and before i can say anything in the back nick goes you fucking asshole like here and here i am decades later worrying if if uh because because i i really i swear a lot i actually had a seminar uh in the 80s had a guy come up to me and he was he was from europe and heavy accent and i can't do it because it's, this is a much cuter story with the accent, but he goes, he says, I, you know, you, you swear an awful lot, you know, and I feel like I'm about to get reprimanded. I mean, like, you know, I don't even know how old I was in the eighties, whatever it was, you know, 30, 28 years old. And I think I'm about to like, Oh fuck. Sorry, man.
Starting point is 00:34:03 I'm sorry. And he goes, um, he goes, um, he says, not a lot of people swear like you. I rather enjoy it. It was like this weird European caught, you know, you like, cause I don't just, I don't just swear. I'm if I say, listen, someone's trying to attack you fucking better defend yourself. You need to, it's a choiceless choice, but anyways. Hey, that sign sign is really cool because when you do put your hand out like that it um it no other hand yeah it pops up because it changes the exposure back there yeah it's when i yeah it's cool i'm too far back yesterday i was skateboarding with my kids down swift street in santa cruz they were skateboarding i was walking and Swift Street in Santa Cruz. They were skateboarding. I was walking.
Starting point is 00:34:46 And we crossed in front of a driveway. And as we crossed in front of a driveway, a car came going the opposite direction and turned in front of my kids. And it wasn't that close, but I wouldn't have made the turn, right? I would have let the kids go. And then I could tell he was lost, and so I gave him kind of a pass, you know, and, and then another 200 feet down, I see, oh, he went to the wrong driveway and now he's turning in front of another driveway that's further down the road. And he turns in front of us again. And I, and I'm with my wife and instead of, you know, being a good, wholesome, uh,
Starting point is 00:35:18 and thanking the universe for not hurting my kids. I say, no, I fucking will kick that guy's fucking teeth out. And my fucking five-year-old goes, who's I'm like, Oh, fuck. It's, it's, it's interesting.
Starting point is 00:35:35 That switch, right? That. Yeah. Oh, crazy. As a parent. Crazy.
Starting point is 00:35:41 Like, Hey, did you just turn twice with a big steel? Same thing too. If someone's walking in front of you on a crosswalk and they're totally in the clear it's totally fine still don't take your foot off the brake and start coming forward right you're not gaining even a half a second and you've put everyone who's in the crosswalk who who has situational awareness on eat at unease i guess
Starting point is 00:36:01 the thing is is just most people have zero i do you think this is a fair statement most people don't have situational awareness um yes yeah a hundred percent and but it's a blend of of uh um a complete lack of situational awareness but also uh respect ethics, selfishness. Like, there's no – like, your statement, I wouldn't have made the turn, is a combination of situational awareness and courtesy and ethics. Like, I hold doors open for people. And I remember I've had this talk a lot where like I'll open a door and someone just briskly walks by me and I'm like, you're welcome. But I realized it was, this was kind of deep. Um, for years I would go like, what the fuck is with
Starting point is 00:37:01 people? If somebody opens the door for me, I always, I would always say thank you. Yeah. Or you grab it so you can hold it for the next person. That's also a thing when they're like, there's 500 people getting off and someone's holding the door. You don't just walk by it's your turn, motherfucker. But then I realized I was holding the door because I was raised properly and, and it was, I felt good about it. And then I realized that maybe I'm, you know, going down too deep and introspective rabbit hole,
Starting point is 00:37:35 but I realized that when I would get angry, if somebody didn't do it, then why was I holding the door? Was I holding the door because I was a good person or was I doing to get thanked? For now, I don't care. A little bit of virtue signaling liberal in you, Tony. I have even more than you. I find that very offensive and triggering. I bet.
Starting point is 00:37:55 Oh, shit. I just, oh my God, you're right. Startle, startle, flinch. We all have it. Right. So you startle, flinch. Can you give me it right so you start give me an example can you give me an example well like anytime you're surprised if i jumped through the screen here and you thought that was real you know your hands would fly up and you you we've all done we've all done that
Starting point is 00:38:15 you're getting something out of a closet in your case it was when you came out of the closet but this is right like a you know you're grabbing something on a shelf and a box falls you don't you don't like drop on the floor and punch or try to pull guard or your hands come up to protect your head someone yells look out you're at a golf course you you you walk into a spider web and you didn't see it you're like exactly um never do that again that was so lame well i was picture when you said you're at a golf course i was picturing like when i throw a frisbee at the beach and it goes astray i always yell heads up and i just and i see people do i see people go like that i mean you're right they protect their head and make their body small yeah so what we figured out this is like an experimental drill in the 80s uh where the drill started triggering wicked flinches we you know this hypothesis was we we trained for
Starting point is 00:39:06 self-defense but we do it in a in a cooperative consensual uh way where i go uh you know so on let's let's practice self-defense you choke me uh no choke me with your right hand okay i'll do this move and and it's this dance we do but when i would experience violence observe violence or or get feedback um i go like nobody ever looks like a martial art when when it's a real fight particularly and i'm not particularly when it's a true surprise with a violent predator versus a consensual what i call a douchebag fight where where you know we both get out of our car and we're like moving around going fuck you fuck you you know yeah and uh so this drill in the 80s we ended up calling it the sucker punch drill uh it would just trigger the like flinches in in uh male female the two genders who would train with those are actually sexes by the way what yeah
Starting point is 00:40:07 male and female are sexes genders is like imaginary shit okay like me and you were old school we probably don't have gender back just have sex in the 80s we didn't that wasn't no because we don't ever think about whether we're a man or a woman when we just pull out our enormous schlongs when we pee then we just say oh i'm man right well speak for yourself right thank you i will um when you say enormous thank you i will i will okay the um uh but anyways this is like the ears and the nose it just keeps growing too it's fucking what a marvelous creature so i'm looking at the graphics here it says unfiltered what do you mean by unfiltered oh i never even noticed that uh i don't know yeah will branstetter made this for me i like it live on youtube dead on spotify and apple why does it say we're dead there i think that was um he probably did this around the whole joe rogan cancel where maybe
Starting point is 00:41:09 people are like spotify's woke i don't know california hormones if you go there and you use the code word seven you get a free doctor's consultation and free blood work and if you go to paper street coffee you get 10 off if you use the word Sevant. Thank you. That was the coolest commercial break I've ever had on a show. Only two companies brave enough to sponsor me. Biggest podcast in the space
Starting point is 00:41:35 by far, no second place, and yet everyone else got the whoopee and the noble and the... Actually, you know what I think? think those those podcasts just get like a pair of shoes maybe and those shoes don't fit my my dwarf feet anyway i have wide feet me too so through the studies that the men and women both sexes were being startled so start a flinch so a couple of neat things happened in the 80s, or a bunch of neat things in terms of like kind of my incubator years.
Starting point is 00:42:07 And so start a flinch. And I was like, why would we've been doing Wing Chun, boxing, wrestling, jujitsu, all this stuff. Why would, if I set up the hypothesis was we were starting self-defense from the physical, knowing what was happening so there was no element of surprise there was no fear other than performance anxiety am i going to do well in this drill um i didn't have to figure out anything i don't have to solve a problem i just had to i showed up for class why would train people where where i'm highly I was highly trained if somebody threw a punch at me at this close
Starting point is 00:42:49 range in this scenario there were times when I'd go whoa shit where did that come from and I was fascinated with the fact that all of my muscle memory which doesn't exist the neural patterns that I've been developing through studying martial arts were completely hijacked and bypassed. And it was fascinating to me. And, you know, I explain it a little bit more lucidly or elegantly now. But back then, I was like, what the fuck's that? And we had VHS cameras, remember the old RCA vhs you'd stick that people like half your audience have to google vhs but vhs and i would watch it back and i'd go because i was desperately trying to do some wayne chun move or some parry or some box and it just wasn't happening and slowly i kind of really leaned into it and then figured out and now we we you know we have cool language like we're going to weaponize your start of flinch your body when a when there's a sudden violent stimulus your flinch response
Starting point is 00:43:52 deploys your executive functions hijacked your cognitive brain can't access its complex motor skills and there's micro flinches as your hands look out you know frisbee at the beach if you see a bomb go off if you see gunfire go off you see people if it's in close proximity uh you'll you'll always see that even when people are getting the shit kicked out of them and they're on the ground they're trying to cover so your body understands at a primal level you know cover your head protect your head so we figured out a bunch of really cool drills on how to engage the uh cross extensor chain and and through cueing a finger splayed outside 90 uh how do it's almost like a human
Starting point is 00:44:33 airbag salon where if i flinch i got all this kinetic energy i inhale i'm like oh shit but if you're if you can attach a uh uh like an internet an intellectual understanding of what the neuron's trying to do, what the brain science behind it. So basically, we're getting neurobiology to work for us. Because flinching is non-conscious. You flinch hundreds of times in your life, if not thousands. A day. flinch hundreds of times in your life if not thousands a day but if you think about it in all seriousness if you think about every time you flinched yeah you never thought about flinching there was never a there was never a fuck that's coming at me really fast i should cover my head
Starting point is 00:45:15 right now right right it's not the definition of the word flinch right if you touch something hot or electrical and you go and you're here and you go fuck and your hand kicks off of that there was never a moment where we went like i need to get off this now i need to move so flinching is this really cool non-conscious uh uh movement that's deployed by your reactive brain and um was it a quick nervous movement as an instinctive reaction to fear pain or surprise oh that's cool i've never even looked up the definition for flinch after all these decades. So anyways, we figured out how to weaponize that through a whole bunch of really cool Pavlovian-style drills.
Starting point is 00:45:57 But what we're doing is we're not teaching people to flinch. This is a big misunderstanding. Especially in the martial arts community, people go, why the fuck would you want to flinch? You don't want to flinch. you because it's non-conscious and right right bypasses executive function you don't ever go wow that punch is so fast i should flinch now like when you eat food it automatically digests just to put it in perspective you're not like oh i'm gonna digest some food right now flinching is the exact same thing it's it's automated
Starting point is 00:46:24 yes it's just it's just exact same thing. It's automated. It's just most of the shit that's automated is on the inside, and this motherfucker is on the outside. Your heartbeat, your thoughts, your digestion process, your breathing, these are automated, but we don't really see those. But this one's on the outside. Yeah. And it's completely automated. An interesting thing also. But what you're saying is you could reprogram it with some detail. Well, what you do is think yin and yang.
Starting point is 00:46:49 What we're doing is we're getting our cognitive brain to embrace what our reactive brain is going to do during certain high stress situations. And so what we're doing is we're improving our mind speed in the conversion of the flinch. So there's a story i often tell of what is that in simple words does that mean get used to it no well it no so so let me i throw a tennis ball at my kid really slow really hard and it fucking hits him and he cries yes i'm like oh sorry so then i'm like okay i better be chill so then i start by just handing it to him and then 20 minutes later we've built up and i'm throwing it to him harder than i was the one that made him cry 20 minutes earlier and now he's conditioned for it is it like that so no so that's that's that's adaptation and that's like the
Starting point is 00:47:34 emotional psychological and it's just making him a better athlete but there will be times where if you if you say to him um hey, what's that? And he goes, what? And you whip it at him and it hits him in his eye or his ears, whatever. Because there's a process called stress inoculation and it's a big thing. So we do a lot of scenarios where you get in your first rep, you're like, what the fuck's going on? Your second rep, you're like, okay, am I good enough to handle what's going on? Your third rep.
Starting point is 00:48:03 And when I say one, two, three, I mean, it might be 30, it might be a month or a year, depending on what you're doing. But your body adapts and you stress inoculate to it. And what you did with your kid was that Pavlovian type conditioning and a stress inoculation. But think back to what the story told you like in the 80s with self-defense if if if you don't tell your kid this is a training exercise so you get good at at charging the net
Starting point is 00:48:34 and and you know slamming the ball down somebody's somebody's face or other reflex or whatever if you never explain and put it in context and you don't do the drills you create the ptsd of getting hit by a tennis ball right so so he cries now he doesn't cry but if you but you're starting the drill going are you ready now and and you and and now you're whipping it so he's getting used to i've agreed to do this what we call acp awareness consent preparation if i've got awareness and i and i consent to the drill i'm prepared i still may fuck up but i'm as prepared as i can be in the moment so um a lot of neuroscience a lot of neurobiology underpinning uh the whole system so you asked an interesting question you're not getting used to the flinch well and maybe this is just semantics you're getting you're understanding
Starting point is 00:49:26 why you flinched and what you need to do immediately so so uh when when bad shit happens most people go into some sort of state of denial a big fear spike will always create doubt doubt will always create hesitation hesitation creates procrastination that domino effect there um doesn't change for anybody but people who are trained like so for example you're not very good at at uh uh weapon handling right you've got guns but you don't shoot a lot where dave is great right not not only not only is he former military he's an active competitive shooter right so if you're at the range have you ever gone shooting with him no uh yeah once twice you probably just because of the the quality of his weapon systems but this could be you know shitty grip did you ever have a gun jam no no okay it's like disneyland at his house with guns everything's perfect and right no i know but
Starting point is 00:50:26 you've had a gun jam well you can get a double feeder stove but a lot of it is not it's not because of his bullets or his ammo if you got a shitty grip and you're not holding it the weapon system can't cycle properly but a new person getting a gun jam will go like this and go if they're they're at the range the gun jams and they'll go oh my god what do i do like my gun look at this there's a part of a brass casing sticking up here or look the slide isn't closed and someone will come over and they'll go and they'll they'll do some sort of like malfunction clear and they'll go well you gotta fix your grip and whatever where dave if his gun jams he knows that without even looking at it he can tell by by by
Starting point is 00:51:08 this by the sound or the feel and he'll immediately go into uh some sort of so what the the jam is the metaphor here is the jam is the flinch you don't know and control what's going to happen how fast you clear your fear clear the convert the flinch gets you back in the fight so i come at you you don't know anything about start a flinching conversion and i go wow i attack you and you go fuck fucking you're pushing away danger and you're you're covering it where somebody who's trained in the system as their micro flinching as the body as they they they're so sentient and so um the the nuances of physiology and the and the the kinesiology the biomechanics you know what this feels like we've now created this pavlovian type relationship where the cognitive brain goes i know know what's happening. You need to
Starting point is 00:52:05 face the enemy. You need to go finger splayed outside 90. You need to drive. And it's like deploying an organic airbag. You were to hit me and my hands come up and create this, this kind of like, like push away danger effect. Now here, I'm going to tell you two really cool stories. So I'm experimenting with this and I'm teaching it every day and I'm getting dialing and dialing it. And, um, I get up one night, middle of the night to go get some water and our, our, our, our kitchen's not in our bedroom. I don't know if that's the same for you guys. So I'm walking, yeah. So I'm walking out of the bedroom and my daughter, Madison is 25 now. She's like seven years old and you've met Maddie. She's very,
Starting point is 00:52:45 she's a small human. So at seven, she's like this big, like weighs like, you know, frigging whatever a pound. She's tiny. She's got this like clear,
Starting point is 00:52:56 clear white porcelain, like skin. And she's got crazy. If she doesn't blow her hair, it's wild and crazy. Like Roger Daltrey, you know, back in the days. She got up at the same time she gets up to come sneak into bed with mom and dad. She's like seven years old. I'm walking through my doorway, rubbing my eyes, adjusting to the light to go to the kitchen as and our hallways got carpet
Starting point is 00:53:27 in it as she walks i don't hear she's super small and light and as i come out of my door and the lights coming in from the hallway window you drop kicked her you drop kicked her you you you know you know those fucking scary porcelain dolls in horror movies yes yes that's what she looks like through the shadow like i look through my peripheral vision and her hair's like this so i see i see a witch a combination witch porcelain doll and i i'm walking through and i go like this i'm like don't fuck like micro flinch as soon as i see her but as soon as i flinch my hands my hands go like if you're the camera walking out going oh my hands go out and she goes hi dad and walks by me and doesn't even react to it but but what what's what what's important about this is i'm the guy that
Starting point is 00:54:23 developed the system around weaponizing the start of flinch and have done all the research on it and and was fully into it and teaching it as a complex motor skill as a conversion primal gross motor gross motor complex here's how you do this and i still flinched but what happened as soon as my body started to flinch the training kicked in and i hit the stance meaning had she been an attacker, I was primed and locked and loaded. That's the point of the training. It's not that we want to flinch, but you have no choice but to flinch. It was crazy.
Starting point is 00:55:00 And there was another story I was going to tell you that was kind of cool, but I completely forgot what it was. Are your kids still at home with you? Nick lives up in L.A., and my two girls are still here. Yeah, I was in and out until I was 34, in and out of the house. How old were you when you moved out? I think 19, 20. were you excited to move out um excited and scared you know and you were in canada yeah and you come straight to the united states no no i i only moved to here in 2008 to virginia beach oh, that's right. Right.
Starting point is 00:55:49 Remember my place in Virginia? Yes. That was bad-ass. Yeah. I actually never saw the place. I just saw pictures of it and I just remember it being bad-ass. Hey, this is a little off subject. How did you meet Greg? Greg Glassman. This is actually a cool story. So I'm at, I'm teaching at a, an event called trexbo it's a tactile response expo 2005 okay um and um they had they had an event on the east coast and west coast they would call it trexbo east trexbo west imagine that and uh so i'm teaching at it and uh and i'm saying things in my lectures i go listen like you're all badasses i'm honored and flattered to be here teachers like swat
Starting point is 00:56:32 military guys and uh but let me tell you this if a stimulus gets introduced too quickly your body will start a flinch that'll affect if you're shooting so and you shoot and you flinch you're going to shoot high the weapon's going to rise because your hands are going to come up and there's all forensics evident i'm doing this whole thing i said and i say things like this i go you don't know when your next fight is going to be you don't know if you're going to be attacked by one person or two person you don't know how long it's going to go so you can't have a favorite move you need need to flow. You can't, your best move might trigger their best counter and you're fucked. So you need to be really good at a bunch of things because the bad guy controls the fight.
Starting point is 00:57:16 You don't know what's going to come at you and you can't. And this sounds like a lot like Greg's talk on specialists, right? And, you know, constantly varied functional movement performed at high intensity where I would say things like, you know, you, you know, and I would say it way less elegantly than Greg, but the messaging was the same of, of you've got to be prepared for the, all fights are dangerous. The most dangerous fight is the ambush. The ambush will trigger a neurobiological survival reflex that'll bypass your complex motor skills. You need to be able to handle these angles and these movements. If you don't weather the ambush, you can't get to
Starting point is 00:57:53 your complex motor skills. And someone comes up to me after and says, and I'm like cutting my teeth in at this point. I'm it's, you know, 2004, 2005. And, uh, you know, imagine, imagine Sivan, you're like, you're, you're in a band and you're doing cover tunes, but you've got some original shit that you start playing and someone comes up to you and they go, man, like you guys are really tight you guys are really good you remind me a lot of and then they named three other bands like when you're trying to make it nobody wants to hear you know hey that was great that date was great you remind me of my ex you know like you don't yeah yes yes i know yes right yes so this guy comes up to me and he goes he goes man that lecture was great you remind me a lot of greg glassman and i go who's greg glassman and uh he goes uh oh he's the founder of crossfit i said what the
Starting point is 00:58:52 fuck is crossfit what a shit name like literally say this to the guy um and he goes uh he goes oh it's like uh like a like a like a, like a fitness thing. I go, okay, whatever. Thanks. Hey, thanks for the compliment, man. No, like, I don't mean in a bad way. Like the guy, like just a lot of this whole surprise and be ready. And I said, okay, cool. Thank you. I leave and I'm teaching at Trexpo East now. And somebody there says to me, you remind me of, of Glassman. That's crazy too. Although I know the communities are really tight. CrossFit was really small then less than a hundred gyms. And the internet was nothing. So, I mean,
Starting point is 00:59:33 these have to be people running in the same circles. Well, you remember a lot of the initial seeds that got CrossFit going was, was work within military groups, secret service. Okay. The three-letter organizations. Yeah. And so I'm doing this, and then this is the best. This is actually about a 10-minute story, but it's worth it, I think.
Starting point is 00:59:59 It's very worth it. So I hear it there, and I'm at fort bragg my and one of my gigs and i've got one of my assistants he's a he's a swat team leader from a north carolina event i'm at fort bragg and i'm at like like this is the big boys at fort bragg and and i go in there and i'm walking through and i'm working with this with this particular unit and and uh um and i'm being vague for obvious reasons and they're not a unit but but they're a unit and i'm walking through the gym and we're about to do we've got we've got uh training machine guns my high gear suits we're about to go do some scenarios and i walk into the gym and there's a whiteboard there and it says
Starting point is 01:00:45 wod remember it's it's 2005 it says wod amrap uh and then it's um uh uh 25 what's cindy uh 15 10 5 or 5 10 15 uh squats pull-ups push-ups yes sir right doesn't say cindy but it says it says you know you know uh you know 15 10 5 you know you're gonna pull up shit and as i walk by i say i go you guys this is like the fucking most badass guys in the army right and i'm like i go you guys having trouble doing like uh 15 pull-ups And then what is it like, you know? And the guy goes, what? I go, what's, he goes, no, I go, what's WOD? WOD, you're going to blow your WOD on this?
Starting point is 01:01:32 What is this? He goes, oh, it's the workout of the day. I go, oh, and it says 20 AMRAP, right? And I go, like, like you guys, like this, you're doing, your workout is 15 of these. And he says, no, you do it for 20 minutes. I go, what's AMRAP? He says, as many rounds as possible. I go, and you know, like any CrossFit workout on a whiteboard until you really understand
Starting point is 01:01:53 programming in the beginning, like you go, wow, this looks like it's gonna be fun. And then as you begin to understand what's going on, you go, oh, fuck. I wonder if I'm going to survive this. Right. You. Right. Right. Right.
Starting point is 01:02:03 Right. I wonder where the wheels come off the bus. Right i regret starting this so but i don't know anything right and i and i go uh i go uh i'm making fun of this and he goes no no you do it for like 20 minutes and it gets pretty it gets pretty fucking gnarly and i go what the fuck is this he goes uh this is the stuff crossfit we're we're testing we're doing. I go, CrossFit? Fucking CrossFit again. This guy, Glassman, this is now the third time in a month and a half. Yeah. So we do our-
Starting point is 01:02:33 You guys were working off the same grant money. I guess. But the guy, John, who was the SWAT guy with me, he goes back. A month later, I'm checking in. He's one of our trainers at the time. We're checking in. He goes, hey, did you ever check out CrossFit? Being the open-minded, insatiable, learning, curious human I am, I go, go no i didn't fucking check out crossfit
Starting point is 01:03:06 the steward the fucking i'm not going to check it out he goes well we started doing it with the SWAT team and like we're a month in and we are stronger and faster than we've ever been everyone loves it it's unreal and i'm like wow what am i one of my team just got converted right so i go to i'm on the website now and i start lurking i'm one of the most ripped off self-defense instructors in the world you know always have been and um uh um so i'm on the website is that good or is that bad that's bad well it's bad if you're trying to grow your brand remember i grew it as the internet was like like well now anybody for 10 bucks can look like a you know they really they've been around forever and they've got this big business right um it was bad
Starting point is 01:03:57 for me in in that uh it was just appropriation without without citation or accreditation i didn't care if people were using it, but they would, they would pretend they came up with it, you know? Yeah. And there's, there's a lot of innovative stuff that we did in there. And it would have been nice. Like you don't, you know, you, you don't start your, your show and go, I always like to say that to thine own self be true. And yeah, Shakespeare. No, I, i came up with like
Starting point is 01:04:25 they're just fucking honor the source right right and um so so i started lurking on the website i'm like i'm seeing like it was back in the days man 500 600 700 comments remember the old old shitty website yeah yeah and um uh and and i'm like holy shit they're they're printing articles they're showing they're the the gifts hadn't even been on there was just a picture explanation uh and but they're giving away the programming and i was fascinated as a ceo of a company going how is this company growing and i'm watching the community go this guy's ripping you guys off. And this guy's like, they're doing this. And I'm like, I'm fascinated with it.
Starting point is 01:05:13 And I watch it for about a month. And then I go, holy shit, Trexpo East, Trexpo West, Fort Bragg. I'm going to call this guy so I find a message, I find an email and I email do you remember what it said on the website back then too, like basically like
Starting point is 01:05:35 here's our email, don't fucking email us everything you need to know about us is on the website do you remember that shit under there? I don't offhand, but I didn't care if it did say that neither did I, I contacted him anyway, but I just remember how it's just like leave us alone that shit under there i i don't offhand but but i didn't care if it did right right right neither did i i contacted him anyway but i just remember how it's just like leave us alone yeah oh i'm sorry hold on a second uh savon is behaving because he's afraid to get choked out only
Starting point is 01:05:56 partially true ah interesting i like it it's really here and uh are we live oh we are alive hey i watched it i watched a commercial the other day uh i was watching the ufc and there's a It's really your laugh. And are we live? Oh, we are live. Yeah, we are. We are live. I dig that. Hey, I watched a commercial the other day. I was watching the UFC, and there's a commercial to exterminate bugs. And in the commercial, there's a spider that falls out of the TV. And every time it did that, I had a little bit – I felt – Like a flinch. Not that big, but inside, I felt it.
Starting point is 01:06:22 It was such a great graphic. It was so smart. That's an interesting thing because when you were talking about the start of flinch earlier yeah how you know you'd see like uh like anytime you see that you see the hands come up the flinching is a micro contraction and um and so if your ass gets tighter and you hold your breath i call that a flinch too right so if you walk into a room and something horrible has happened already and you go,
Starting point is 01:06:47 Holy fuck. And you stop. So anything that derails your tactical imperative is a flinch. It just, I just popped in my head when you, when you, you talked about like flinching doesn't always look like hands up, cover your head.
Starting point is 01:06:58 By the way, you said something that was fucking brilliant here. And we'll get back on track about meeting Greg stimulus is is stimulus introduced too quickly yes that's a fuck that that's a great definition that's like a great explanation of what a flinch is stimulus is 1988 that line is from 1988 my first go at a powerpoint um because i started having like like cops and teams contacting us and they would say hey could you send a poi and i go like what's a poi and i'd like you know the the program of instruction could you like an outline and what's what are the deliverables and i'm like what and i had to write up shit uh and the hypothesis was a a if if you're a boxer you don't really see boxers flinch the way we talk about like this because of
Starting point is 01:07:48 the a the acp awareness consent preparation but if the boxer was eating a burger or signing an autograph and somebody punched them you know their hands would react i've got this amazing maybe we can pull it up oh i'm gonna try and i'm gonna try and pull this up and and share this you can you can text me a link and i can pull up too hey tony so there's this thing that i've done with my life ever since i had my awakening in my 20s to not to every opportunity that something happens that other people would react to i don't so i if i'm standing in line at the dmv and my cell phone slips out of my hands and it's my old nokia and all the pieces go flying everywhere most people be like oh my god or oh and i just act cool i'll just be like look at my wrist wipe
Starting point is 01:08:35 my hand maybe pick up a couple pieces or if like a bird shits on me and like i'm somewhere eating for dinner like i i've trained myself to to not react to be just fucking the coolest dude ever to to be the crazier the shit happens to be present in the situation yeah just to be like hey this is an opportunity for me to be cool i like it yeah i like it yeah i dig that yeah it's like i don't want to be like everyone else i don't want to be like uh some guy stole my sister's camera one time and i chased him down and uh and and he was like clearly a homeless guy and he was all fucked up and everyone you know everyone thought it was gonna be like this fight and instead i'm like hey dude give the camera back and then i just sat there and talked to him for five or ten minutes and explained to him why it's
Starting point is 01:09:19 not cool got on the level with him okay sorry that's. That's all right. That's all right. I'm, I was getting a, I was trying to find this, this photo of Ali flinching. And I can't right now. God damn it. Why isn't it here? I got this video of Ali on a talk show where, and this is a great example, where this comedian throws a jab at Ali in the middle of a story. And Ali's leaning in, listening to the story. And this guy goes, and he goes, and then Muhammad. And Ali goes, yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:06 He goes, whack, and he throws a punch right at him, Sivan. And Ali literally goes like this. Like, hands out, mouth open. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. I'll find the picture. I just looked for, oh, so he, okay. Because I typed in Muhammad Ali flinch.
Starting point is 01:10:21 And I didn't get that. The kind of annoying that I don't have it here because I've got it. Here's another one. Fantastic fighter, champion of civil rights. Wasn't perfect in this clip he is throwing. Let's see if I found it. How do I get this? Anyways, let me finish the Greg story.
Starting point is 01:10:42 It's going on too long, but it's so cool. Oh, it's a great story.'t worry i email greg uh uh greg hey it's it seems we're you know uh we've got a lot of mutual friends in the industry i got a bunch of questions for you and uh i i don't know what i was thinking but i just there was something said i got to meet this guy and um i email him no answer and i'm like the type of guy you know me how responsive i am i'm i'm like like that person you make you make fun of with the text like i get an email you know you're high maintenance you're high maintenance friend but i'm like like it's really not well we have an we have an sop like in my company if we're too busy to answer like like like like our our inside people i you, you have a can response and
Starting point is 01:11:26 says, Hey, we're super busy. Sorry. We can't answer you right now, but you're, you know, we'll get back to you. I go, you're never too busy to let somebody know a client. Like we're really big on, on customer service and caring about people. And, um, I hate can responses. Well, when I say can response, meaning you i hate them too but there's like this is this is the template and then you would go dear savannah we're in the middle you right right opening sentence but this is our like hey we're too busy you know uh please give us 48 hours or a week or whatever it is um so i email greg no answer a couple days go by i go i email him again hey i don't know if you missed this but but because I'm used to people like CEO to CEO
Starting point is 01:12:07 fucking answer me. I think I sent six emails over like a few weeks and I'm getting pissed. So my last email was something to the effect of, hey, I'm beginning to feel like a stalker and an asshole. If you're not interested in talking to me, just answer me, say, hey, not interested. I might've even wrote, go fuck yourself or something.
Starting point is 01:12:27 Not to me, but tell me to fuck off. Right, right. And he doesn't answer that. And I'm driving to go teach. I was teaching a seminar in Las Vegas. And the phone rings. And I'd left my phone number, obviously, in the email. The phone rings.
Starting point is 01:12:44 And it's Greg it's it's Greg but I don't know it like it's not in my he's not in my my right so phone rings I go yeah hello he goes T oh awesome right he calls me T right away we've never spoken T yeah yeah and you know that's what he calls me I go yeah hi who is Hi, who is this? He goes, Greg Glassman. I'm like, no shit. He goes, what's up? It was just like, start literally just starts talking. Like we've been friends for 20 years and we're just catching up. And, uh, uh, he says, yeah, I, uh, he doesn't even say like, sorry, I didn't answer those six emails or just, just starts talking. and he goes listen and this is the craziest thing he goes um uh i've been hearing about you too from uh you know a bunch of
Starting point is 01:13:35 his friends i'm gonna mention names on here because i think some of them are still active duty and stuff like that but but you know uh from so and so and so and so and uh we got to get together and i'm like okay cool and uh he says listen why don't you come to santa cruz and do a crossfit seminar and i'd like i'd love to so he invited jesse and i went up there and uh i think it was the last gig that he taught at oh then i i'm sure I met you there. That's probably 2006 or seven. Yeah. Dave was still in.
Starting point is 01:14:08 Yes. Was that in Scott? Was that at the Scotts Valley gym or was that his gym? That was a Scotts Valley gym. Scotts Valley. And there was a boxing ring in there or something too. Nope. Well,
Starting point is 01:14:18 maybe it, maybe was there a little ring? No, it was, it was that Brendan Gillian's gym. No, no, it was,
Starting point is 01:14:24 it was the HQ gym gym it was the uh on soquel okay okay okay okay it was the the last gig uh nicole was there uh uh budding bergner hackleman came by and yeah it was like it was a it was a big it was a big freaking deal um and um do you remember if hackleman was there with glover when glover was just a kid i remember he would bring glover around okay i don't i don't remember that but it was um it was pretty badass and so uh uh me jess greg uh lauren we went out to dinner and he described to me everything crossfit we went to dinner he said it's going to grow into this massive brand uh like he described everything we were at what's that there was that one really good restaurant cafe cruise cafe cruise yeah so
Starting point is 01:15:17 good we ate there and uh it's the only fucking restaurant i mean if you want if only you know fans even though it's not that schmancy yeah um the uh but uh yeah we've been we got we've been close ever since ever since that you know as you were telling the story i was thinking i'm very close to both dave and greg and i i don't know if there's another person who is besides you interesting i can't think of one i can't think of one i i mean i think that if when we got off the show that if were the two people if we called dave or g, they would pick up immediately. And you ended up living, you and Dave and Greg ended up living pretty close to each other in San Diego. And
Starting point is 01:16:10 then when I lived with Greg during those years, that's when we started, our friendship really grew. Yeah. That was crazy when everyone, yeah. And I, yeah. That was in San Diego, California, everyone. For those of you who don't know where that is, it's just north of the border where Mexico and the United States meet. And it's a great town. I guess it's California's answer to Miami. It's a really, really cool place. You're still down there, right? Yeah. Yeah. Encinitas. could live anywhere and raise a family. It might be anywhere on planet earth. It might be there. And the reason why is, is it has fantastic weather and then everything is there. So if you wanted the world's greatest violin teacher for your kids, you could find it. If you wanted the world's
Starting point is 01:16:52 greatest baseball coach, you could find it. And by that, by world's greatest, I mean, I know that there's a thousand of the world's greatest, but it has everything down there. Jiu-Jitsu, physics, biology. I mean, the schools, the, the i mean it's just a beautiful uh north county san diego is just it's like it's like almost perfect it's uh it's pretty amazing here and it's and it's weird with when the last couple years um with all the craziness going on you know there are a couple times like me you know, very involved in the personal professional security and all of that. You start thinking, fuck, like this is a shit show. And a lot of my friends are moving Texas, Montana, you know, like, like places, you
Starting point is 01:17:38 know, Tennessee. Yeah. And, um, I said to Jess, I said, Hey, do you want to move? You know, she goes, we're not fucking moving. I'm like, okay. Um, you know, hopefully the pendulum will swing. Cause it, cause it is, you know, I wanted my whole life. Some background on that is, is, is growing up in Canada, East coast.
Starting point is 01:18:00 Um, all, all I wanted to do was live in California. I i don't know why i grew up you know just you know through the 60s watching every every tv show batman and robin the wild wild west uh um all this stuff and and so you know back in the days you know kids didn't have ipads they had tvs and uh there was just something about California. And when I first got here, I was 13 going to Disneyland with my dad. As soon as I got off the airplane at 13, I like went, took a deep breath of the air, look at some palm trees and said, this is where I'm living. You know,
Starting point is 01:18:42 I, I, I, I personally live in woketopia and uh this past weekend miranda alcarez and julian alcarez the founders of the hugely successful street parking had a huge party at dave's ranch uh in god man miranda and julian are so impressive but but uh while i was there i met a bunch of people and they're like from all over the world who came for that party, and they were like, oh, shit. And they're like, what? And I always wondered why you stayed. Now I get it. I mean, California, you really can't explain this place.
Starting point is 01:19:19 And for all the people all over the world, especially if you're outside the United States, you can't even imagine it. That's the weird thing i get in these arguments with people in the dms you know they're telling me how great it is in denmark or the netherlands or all these you know these these countries that you know i guess think that they have their shit together i'm like you are a country of 16 000 square miles i'm a country of 3.2 million square miles and i live on this fucking piece of land that sits on the pacific ocean where the freedom here you can't even you can't even fathom it and i've spent a lot of time in those countries and we also have the east coast which is weird it's more like europe you know the way the freeways are on the toll roads it just doesn't feel free like the west
Starting point is 01:20:01 yeah the east coast does and uh yeah it's it's it's gonna be a really hard place um i i don't think it's lost by the way not even close i think i think that we're going to um spin around i sure i sure hope so but i agree with you with the uh you know i've got you know friends who who uh um live here they get asked the question here you move you doing that no you know what about this what about this or just no you you've got you've got to dig in and and and fight for for whatever you fight for at spiritual level emotional psychological physical or or even in in get into politics at the local level. But in terms of when I've been traveled around the world as well,
Starting point is 01:20:49 just like you. So some people might think it's arrogant to go, well, California is the best or America is the best. But, you know, you've traveled literally, you know, way more than I have. And I've been all over the world. You can see. And every country has a cool little area. Of course, of course.
Starting point is 01:21:09 But there's like California, you can, and just in terms of activity, air, you can go, you can go hiking, you can go skiing. Yeah. You and I could go skiing and surfing in the same day. No problem. No problem. Yeah. So and, and then access to, to to the world class stuff like that but i mean those are all like kind of like first world you know hypotheticals you know for for people but i i'm with you on that man i dig it here uh that i going to, I'm going to go back to this other thing. I was thinking about how many doors we've opened just in that conversation. You, you said a line,
Starting point is 01:21:50 my integrity is never for sale. This is tying back to you running a business. You said my integrity is never for sale. I didn't really know what the word integrity meant until my wife and Dave kind of schooled me on it over the last 10 years of my life. And for me that I could look up the exact definition of integrity, but for me, integrity means just being honest. And when I mean honest, I mean, honest about everything you call me and we have a date to go. Um, our families have a date to go see a play or an orchestra. And I just ended up calling you, Hey, you know what? I just want to stay home and drink tonight. I don't tell you one of my kids is sick. Right? Like I just fucking tell you honesty on that level. And that's what integrity, the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles and moral
Starting point is 01:22:33 uprightness. Uh, it's, it's, it's, it's doing the right thing. It's pulling into a parking spot. And even though the guy got there, you got there before the guy, you can tell he's got a car full of five kids. You make the quick assessment and you're like, and you back out and you're like, have a good day, brother. You brother you know just just always kind of trying to do the right thing even small tiny things don't don't ignore trash that blows by you just grab it and throw it yeah it's not a big deal yeah how do you run a business with integrity in a time when the entire fucking not the entire world i think the most of the world want is looking for
Starting point is 01:23:05 people with integrity but we had a wave of psychosis come through here that i think is waning that was like hey if you had integrity you would be punished financially yeah how did you survive that because it would be i i think when when you operate and if that's too vague i can give you some examples but you know what i mean okay yeah no like if you if you operate from a place of integrity you never you don't deviate um so so even for money though yeah and i don't mean like money to like i mean money to put food on your table i mean it shit was getting weird here for a year or so yeah no it was uh you know i almost i actually almost lost everything went two weeks to flatten the curve became several months and and i canceled 35 courses and most of my courses are contract and and like big law enforcement military and nobody was
Starting point is 01:24:00 training and then nobody had money and then it was defund the police and i was like you know for it was scary man there was there was a day there where i thought somebody had shoved a vacuum up my ass and was sucking out my insides and uh like it felt that bad just your life no no i was like like literally in my in my office with my head on my hands like like this going i'm gonna like i'm gonna lose everything will not be able to take care of my family. Because my business, we're a boutique. We're word of mouth. And, you know, we've got three verticals in the company,
Starting point is 01:24:38 our scenario training and our equipment, the whole spear system for law enforcement and military. What's the third one? what's the third one what's the third one the third one is our pdr program our our how to train how to teach our approach to behaviorally based self-defense to martial arts instructors and self-defense instructors and uh like all of that stopped like everyone's afraid everyone's wearing masks and but even my audience was they were all like deployed right nobody's doing any training you know and then it was again the next day i defund the police you're absolutely not doing any training and and it turned out that many of these agencies leadership was compromised. They were woke.
Starting point is 01:25:25 They were, they were political. But this starts, this starts back. Like I didn't, I didn't. Hey, were they woke or did they just lack integrity? That's what I noticed. I noticed all so many people around me just didn't have integrity. Yes. That's a great observation.
Starting point is 01:25:44 I think so. You know, have you. That's a, that's a great observation. I think so. You know, have you, have you. It's scary. It's scary. I'm not hating on him by the way. I know it sounds like I am. I kind of am, but it's scary because you have, like you said, you have to put, you have to feed your family. The, and that's, that's the, have you watched any of the, what's his name? The KGB interviews?
Starting point is 01:26:08 Yes, yes, yes. I forget the guy's name too, but fascinating. You mean like he said he was predicted this to the T 40 years ago. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you can see that it's been in all these people from Trudeauau to build back better to you know they're all all speaking points and all the yuri something or other um yes yes but uh good job yeah so very besman off i cheated yeah that's no no that's that's not cheating it's good driving me crazy listen i can remember in in when i was a teenager i worked in uh some restaurants
Starting point is 01:26:48 and uh uh did you know did other things just trying to make make some money and and i uh i remember once getting a um maybe i was 17 18 years old out you know driving with some friends and some late night diner and the the waitress had forgotten to charge us for like, like a pudding dessert, you know, that was a dollar or 75 cents at the time or whatever. And, and I was looking at the bill and I noticed that. And there's a moment where you go, Oh, okay wow i don't have to pay and then it was like no you have to pay and then it was like excuse me yes is there a problem with the bill
Starting point is 01:27:31 yeah you forgot to charge me for something i mean that's always i've been like it was if it was a penny if it was if you know um that's just that that's like to me that's a part of integrity too it's just you you you know what the right thing is. And I've never, I've never deviated in the times that I've, I'd maybe, and I'm just saying this cause I don't have specifics where, where maybe I said, well, maybe I'll tell myself a white lie. I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll do this. It, it consumed me. I couldn't, I couldn't, I had to fix it. It was always about doing the right thing. And
Starting point is 01:28:07 yeah, integrity. But my, go ahead. No, no. My friend who's a Santa Cruz cop, Santa Cruz County Sheriff stops a kid stealing two bottles of vodka from the store the other day. Kid says, hey, it's no big deal.
Starting point is 01:28:25 This is a big corporation. It's just a few pennies to them. And I say this to a lot of people with all the arrogance I can muster, zero humility. I say this with coming from pure self-confidence, pride, and arrogance. I say this with coming from pure self-confidence pride and arrogance i say this to you no matter how much you don't like me no matter how much you don't like me or the things i say if you had to leave your kids with someone you would leave them with fucking me and i'm going to explain to you why hi jesse this kid who said it's only a few pennies to this corporation,
Starting point is 01:29:08 if every – would you want someone like – everyone to think like that? What would society – what would happen to society if everyone thought like that? Or do you want someone who says, yeah, it's only a few pennies, and we all have to do our part? If you think like that kid, Elon Musk has all the money and can pay more taxes and more taxes than anyone else take it from it's only a few pennies you can steal from the corporations if everyone thinks like that we collapse as a fucking society 100 if everyone thinks hey man you can't steal let's all do our part every penny counts we flourish as a society so let's say we live in this world of just dichotomy. You may not like my stance on abortion. You might not like my stance on racism. You may not like my – but at the end of the day, your kids do better with me than with the person that's like goes out and buys all the pink tresses for their boys. do and so but run use don't let your emotion cause this cognitive dissonance in you where
Starting point is 01:30:06 you're not thinking straight or you can make these fucking ridiculous exceptions like hey it's just a couple fucking pennies put it start start contextualizing it and using relativity and using situational awareness use use this massive brain you have to be like how would the world be if everyone thought like that we can't have that so savannah where does where how does how does all of that happen so the one thing that all these kids who would say something as idiotic as that yeah i would have said i would have said that too guilty well but but so there's only two places that you learn that one is your fucking woke schools. Yeah. Which is where I went. Yeah. Or where I went. Right. Or your bullshit parents.
Starting point is 01:30:50 So when I when I raised and fake compassion, fake kindness, those are not compassion and kindness. But here's an interesting thing to think about is all of those people that have that. all of those people that have that yeah they all they all have uh i mean it's it's more than these two but but it starts with these two they have fucked up parents or fucked up educators yeah because if you were fed the right way to think and as i just wrote this in in yesterday's newsletter that you know the right way to think is always the right way. It's just often the hardest choice to make because we're just so fucking distracted in the eighties when, um, or just give people the tools on how to think critical thinking is just keep defining words. Like we've had, we look up the word flinch, right? Like just keep looking up
Starting point is 01:31:43 what words mean. people want to keep asking me sorry go ahead sorry go ahead no no but this like this goes back to like like to me the deeper is this is a cool quote when when my son was born i got custody of him like literally at like a month old and and that was a big, heavy, hard decision. And I got custody of him, and I didn't know what I was doing, and I started studying and reading, and I found another one of those. It was around the same decade that I shared that quote at the beginning, if you take your space in the world, the world will make a place for you.
Starting point is 01:32:22 I found a quote in a book while I'm trying to figure out how to be a good dad. I had a parent was some therapist said, when he's working with kids, he says, I always like to meet the parents. It helps me forgive the children. Yeah. So like when you talk about all of this, like when you say, why don't people just like learn, like look up words, learn, well, who's going to, who teaches a kid who doesn't understand learning how to learn. So it's, it's that it's, it's some guardian. It's some, you know, and it's like you teaching your boys, everything they're exposed to. It's, it's some guardian it's some you know and it's like you teaching your boys everything they're
Starting point is 01:33:06 exposed to it's it's i've said this to jess i i i'm so interested to see what your boys end up doing as they get older because they've been exposed to i think i joked with you a couple times in the past like you know would you adopt me like i wish you know my dad's not here right now but he didn't do a fucking hundredth of the stuff that you're doing you know with with your kids uh he was probably working his ass off though to put food on the table the only way he knew how right like my parents yeah yeah for 100 i mean uh it's it's uh but it's a choice right it? It's, it's that, it's that in integrity, you make that choice. I've had, I've had lots of times where I could have and should have spent
Starting point is 01:33:51 more time with the kids, but was working on other stuff. And, you know, you, you, you somehow, you pay the price for that in either relationship or guilt or, or what have you. But, uh, yeah, or guilt or or what have you but uh yeah i mean if we greg glass greg just texted called me a second ago and i told him i was on a podcast with you and this is what he texts me by the way about you um i hold tony and tony blauer in the highest regards uh he was introduced to me by the best operators i met in a couple of decades he was supporting for fighting men around the world he was support for fighting men around the world nice yeah that's nice anyway sorry to interrupt sorry to give you a handy just here no no it's nice to hear you know what man i i get i don't even think about it so i'm 62 and i've been teaching for 43 years since 1979, 1980.
Starting point is 01:34:48 And I don't even think about it. I was out in Perth a few years ago and taking an Uber back to the hotel and this driver says to me, so what do you do? And I'm leaving like this tier one. Perth is South Africa? Perth, Australia. Australia, sorry.
Starting point is 01:35:01 Yeah, that's all right. There's probably a Perth in Africa, I don't know. So the, and the guy says, so this is a particular gate at this army base, and everyone knows, like, who's there and what it is. So he picks me up there, and he goes, hey, you know, when he hears my non-Australian accent, he goes, hey, what do you do? And I go, well, I tell you, I've got to kill you. You know, you just picked me up, right? So we laugh. We laugh. And I go, but I don't want to kill you because you're driving and I got to get to the
Starting point is 01:35:33 hotel. So I'll tell you when you drop me off and then I'll kill you. And we're joking around. And he goes, so, you know, so what, you know, what do you do? I said, well, I teach hand-to-hand combatives. And he goes, oh. He says, you must be good if they brought you overseas. I said, well, that's the rumor. And he goes, how long have you been doing that? And at the time, I go, I guess 39, 40 years. And he said, you've been doing that for 40 years?
Starting point is 01:36:07 I go, yeah. He says, you never had another job? I go, no. He goes, most people don't have one job for 40 years. And I'd never even thought about that. It blew my mind. We had the most amazing conversation. we had the most amazing conversation. But I knew in the seventies when I discovered martial arts and Bruce Lee and training, I was 15 years old. I'm sitting on the floor doing the splits,
Starting point is 01:36:38 looking at Bruce Lee magazine or working on the splits. And my mom comes up to me and says, hey, have you thought about what you're going to focus on in school you know are you going to be a lawyer a doctor an astronaut the veterinarian what are the they're only like four or five professions back in the 70s and uh and i looked up and i said mom school is not going to be a big uh part my life. I'm going to be a famous martial artist like Bruce Lee and teach. So you guys have to understand that when we were kids, I don't know if it's like this now because my kids, like I hold school with zero value now,
Starting point is 01:37:15 but there were no cell phones. There were no internet. You couldn't look up equals MC squared. You couldn't like, like today you could perform heart surgery on a fucking rare breed of horse from Iceland with a year's worth of study on the Internet. Maybe maybe a week's worth of study on the Internet. Like it's all available to you. There was nothing available to us when Tony said his mom probably fucking wanted to kill herself and thought, what have I done wrong?
Starting point is 01:37:37 It's the worst thing you could have ever said to your parents. I'm not going to school. Worst. Right. Worst. And it was it was telling him you want to get a transition sorry i couldn't resist the uh the um it was interesting i never even thought about that but uh by the way i accept the transition just not from a 12 year old right wait till you're 32
Starting point is 01:38:01 when i asked my mom if i could get a nose job she said yeah in your 20s i'll pay for it i asked her when i was 15 same thing your kid asked you if you can have his penis removed you say yeah no problem let everything develop fully first into a healthy human being and then at 20 once you're kind of established in your 20s we'll fucking get that talk chopped right off give you a vagina start doing it to him when there's 12 you're a fucking savage you should be putting a rocket and shot to pluto i used to say i want to kill those people my wife doesn't let me say that so now you're just getting a rocket and go to pluto yeah hurting kids is unacceptable okay sorry so you tell your mom 1972 hey i'm not going to school yeah martial martial
Starting point is 01:38:40 arts yeah and she's like she literally pat me on the head and said okay dear we'll talk about this when you're older yes yes if your son asked for a motorcycle you say absolutely just give me a few years i'm gonna save for it not yes not no you kick that motherfucker down the road you let this kid process don't get no when you stand up against evil sometimes you just make it bigger or things you don't like it just gets bigger just chill 12 tony was jumped for the first time at 12 years old that was the same year i was born 1972 nice it's coming out of my mom's vagina you were getting fucking punched in the face well what does the unfiltered mean on that says on here when does it mean you'll say things like without no it means i drink lake water i was um i've talked i think i've had tony on the crossfit podcast once i think i've had him on this podcast once this is the third time i think i brought this up every show but it is
Starting point is 01:39:42 probably one of the most impactful things that t said to me, even though I can't remember. So I'm going to help him, help him say it to me again. When I was a young man, I wasn't driving yet. And I think my sister was 16 and I was 12 and we were at a drive through at Wendy's and she accidentally hit the horn and a guy got out of the car in front of us. And he was like a 45 year old man. Um, and he started spitting on the car and screaming at us. And this went on for like five or 10 minutes. And I just felt horrible that I couldn't get out of the car and do something to him. And I was telling Tony the story one time and he, I can't remember exactly how you said it, but you said something about when you have altercations or interactions with people like
Starting point is 01:40:19 that, it's important that you come out emotionally, emotionally intact. like i can't remember exactly how you said it i'm gonna say i'm not gonna say it right but basically it doesn't matter whether you win or lose the fight you want to leave knowing that you did the right thing kind of do you remember what you told me it really rocked me like for 10 or 15 years after that happened. So I was in my twenties, you know, I just felt like I let my sister down and I didn't, my sister didn't give a shit. My sister could beat me up then. She probably still can't beat me up. But nobody, I mean, you felt oppressed and you felt weak and you felt, and it's weird. It's, it's yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's oppressive. And that's why anybody who. Like, I don't want to get jumped ever and not know that
Starting point is 01:41:14 I did the right, like you earlier when you were saying, sorry, you're saying people cover up. And when you watch that, sometimes you're like, dude, get up and run. Like there's three dudes jumping a guy and he's covered up on the ground. I'll be like, dude, get up and run like there's three dudes jumping a guy and he's covered up on the ground i'll be like dude get up and run but but but you don't and then that haunts you right well it's it's you know it's it's a weird thing so also in the 80s is when i started doing scenarios as opposed to uh um bruce wayne seven that's the worst nose job ever asked for your money back. Okay. Asshole. I didn't get it.
Starting point is 01:41:54 In the eighties, we started doing this scenario. So one of my, you know, students gets jumped and I realized in this moment, everything I taught him didn't work. And I, and I was, I was fucking furious. I was, I make the joke that, that, that his loss hit me harder than the punch that dropped him. Is this the, is this the Mitch kid? Yeah. Okay. And, and I was like, I was like, I'm, I trained this guy. How is it that he didn't even do one thing that I taught? And I realized what I was teaching him was how to spar, not how to defend himself in a street fight. And so we started doing scenarios.
Starting point is 01:42:34 And we got really big in the immersion into scenarios. Isn't that cool that you looked at yourself? You didn't blame him. Right. You looked at yourself. And I was 20, man. I tell people it was like the god of self-defense hit me with a lightning bolt it was literally life-changing well it it it it really you know before uh there were kickstarter programs that's what kickstarted my my system was because i was teaching boxing and taekwondo and wrestling at the time, like a,
Starting point is 01:43:05 like a, like a blend of, of mixed martial art, if you will. And, um, but what I realized in that moment was real violent encounters don't happen inside a ring or on a, on a, on a mat. And, and that when you're in that situation, there's overwhelming distractions of fear and threat discrimination, a fancy word for like, how much danger am I in? What am I? Are we punching each other in the face? Does this guy have a knife or a gun? What's his buddy's going to do? And all of that stuff changes. You know, the difference between the street and the ring it's it's massive that's one of the one of my pet peeves and frustrations with the the the martial art world is is just this assumption that uh the uh your martial art is going to just manifest itself out in the real world because there's so many things in in the pre-fight element right and uh you know if i said because everything's taught taught at
Starting point is 01:44:03 step and i've heard you talk about this extensively in podcasts every no one's talking about step one or maybe even step two situational awareness and then the encounter everyone's already at step three it's fucking it's on right yeah we refer to that as timeline of violence is understanding it's kind of like this mental blueprint of violence and and uh that when you practice when you do your 10 000 reps of how to get out of a headlock right you're eliminating all the dissonance all the fear management all the verbal all the situational awareness because it's like a savannah remember head on a swivel situational awareness okay uh you know get me in a headlock i'll show you this counter and it jumps right to
Starting point is 01:44:42 a physical move so what you're actually if you know the whole 10 000 hour theory or myth that you know erickson uh did the research malcolm gladwell made it famous in his book and then uh matt uh um um who's who's that rap singer made it really famous uh macco whatever fuck his name is i just forgot forgot his name. Sorry. Um, I don't, I don't even know. I just know. I just heard it from Gladwell's book. Yeah. So, so it was,
Starting point is 01:45:09 why did you call it a myth? We'll come back to that. Because there's, there was some, cause people start, just started talking about as the 10,000 hour rule or, or it became a, it,
Starting point is 01:45:19 it wasn't exactly what the original researcher Erickson, uh, hypothesized about it. And it was taken from there, but I looked at it more globally and said, look, if you do anything 10,000 times, you're going to get fucking good at it.
Starting point is 01:45:33 So it was this, how do I tame mastery? What did the Beatles do for 10,000 hours? What did this tennis player do for 10,000 hours, the skier? And, and so it was, it was interesting because where, how I use it, I go, if you do
Starting point is 01:45:46 anything good, if you do anything for 10,000 reps or 10,000 hours or 10,000 days, if you're disciplined to do that, you're going to get really good at it. And so we've got a couple of maxims in our, in our program. One of them, highly misunderstood, be careful what you practice. You might get really good at the wrong thing. Yeah yeah so i like that so people will hear that and they go is he putting down jujitsu is he putting down Thai boxing is he putting down crop and i go no you don't understand every time you do a dedicated intelligent rep you're training your neurons to fire signal speed myelinization of the neuron it's all brain science so if i say to if i if you're a boxer and i walk up to you and i go hey man i saw you staring at me from across the bar the boxer's not ever going to
Starting point is 01:46:30 think i should double leg this guy and then take his back the boxer's thinking body shot uppercut yeah if you're a jujitsu guy and i walk up to you and i go hey man i saw you staring at me from across the bar the jujitsu guy is never going to go. I should hit this guy with a fucking left, right. He's going to think I'm going to double leg the guy. And so we create a dopamine and a, uh, uh, a neurological relationship, but I mean, a dopamine relationship too, because we have, when you do jujitsu, you have fun. When you box, you have fun. You it's you're gravitating towards. So you get this chemical relationship, right, to this is my favorite move. This is what I like to do. The danger when you talked about, you started to say step one, step two, and I said timeline of violence, is there's probably more
Starting point is 01:47:17 times where, and I'll insert this here, hopefully I'm not all over the place, but every victim of violence that I've ever interviewed and studied in countless books I've read on violence, every victim of violence who lived to tell the tale said they had a bad feeling. So the first pre-contact cue that there's something wrong is your second brain, your gut going, something's fucking off here. And if cognitive bias or cognitive dissonance
Starting point is 01:47:44 or social conditioning or arrogance or you're drunk or blinders or fear prevent you from going, what's that feeling in my stomach? We call this the choose safety moment, like where, you know, not to be confused with playing it safe, but how do I choose safety? What is the safest thing I could do here? The safest thing I could do here might be to fucking run or hide or barricade or just leave. But if all of now, let's go back to Gladwell and Erickson and the 10,000 reps. What if all you know about self-defense is a lapel grab, a counter to a punch, how to get over a headlock, how to block a kick. In other words, most martial arts programs start with defending against the attack.
Starting point is 01:48:27 So listen to this. If you've done 10,000 reps of, and I'll just use the headlock because everyone can visualize it. If you've done 10,000 reps of learning how to get out of a headlock, by default, you've done 10,001 reps of letting somebody attack you. And then you kind of need to get in that position to start the game you kind of get in a weak position to start the game neurologically your brain doesn't understand the intercept yeah yeah what about this as as something similar if you're a shooter and all you do is practice shooting but you never practice unsheathing the gun so basically you're a level 10 shooter but you're level one unsheathing the gun. So basically you're a level 10 shooter, but you're a level one unsheathing the gun.
Starting point is 01:49:06 You get killed in the gun fight because you don't fucking got your fucking gun out. Can all my, my shooters listening to this know that Savan has no fucking clue. Unsheathing your gun. Yeah. Unsheathing. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:49:18 Unsheathing. He's got a sheath. What do you call unholstering? Unholstering. Sorry. I got my weapon. Get it out of the holster. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:49:27 I mean, right? So if you have a gun and you've never, you always just go to the range and you're always just shooting. I make that, we have a gunfighting course called Concealed Carry Combatives. And the hypothesis of it is like you're not walking around with your gun in your hand when shit kicks off and you go flinch so i didn't just invent that you you you had already thought of that yeah sorry well no i mean a different concept but the idea but the idea is um yeah just you and i are the only one that have ever said we should practice drawing our gun we're the only two people in the world that thought of that but you're right your gun your gun is in its holster somewhere concealed or on your hip or on your ankle or or or in a pouch and if you don't practice getting that out in a high stress
Starting point is 01:50:15 situation that's the complex motor skill that could end up fucking you or like in the movies you see they have the the fucking gun pointed at someone and clearly the person who is pointing the gun doesn't have the fucking chutzpah to fucking fire and it gets taken from them well i mean this is and this is that other big part that that that i wanted to bring up in the 80s doing the scenarios i noticed that we would create these scenarios and these well-trained people or people who'd gone through like a, we do these two day, we used to call them panic attack seminars. Um, and ask your mom, ask your mom if I need practice, I'm drawing my weapon. The, um, uh, and I, we would set up these scenarios and we ended up calling these seminars,
Starting point is 01:51:02 the panic attack seminars, cause, because people would fucking freak out. They wouldn't do their wrestling or their boxing or their Krav or their whatever. They were these open seminars. We'd come in almost like a safer version of Fight Club. There'd be equipment that we would use so you didn't get wrecked. So what I started realizing is if people don't manage their fear, they're not going to manage to fight. Didn't guarantee victory or defeat or didn't influence. But if you, if you can't manage your fear, then you're not going to manage to fight at least, at least to tap into, uh, the, your potential. I had that quote. I had that quote in here from one of your other podcasts. Yeah, it's fascinating. But those are unique. I tell people this is kind of like a CrossFit-esque
Starting point is 01:51:53 influence. There are four phases to managing violence. One is we need to have functional situational awareness. If we have functional situational awareness, we know what to look for. As soon as you realize you're in danger, I don't care how trained you are, your physiology will change. So there will be a fear spike. We need to have self-awareness to identify, Jesus, I just went from parasympathetic to sympathetic, right? Like what's going on? Because those are always the pre-contact cues. Should I like slip back into the crowd and kind of watch and scan or should i have my hand on my gun here or should i get an improvised weapon in my hand like what's going on but while you're processing that there's fear running through your body at a bio and there's
Starting point is 01:52:36 psychological fear but there's also the physiology fear your instincts will will will do a whole bunch of things at a physiological at a bio level. But then the psychological fear is kind of like the, it's the wild card. It's the missing link, even at the highest level of training, where the psychology of fear is your brain hijacking you. And I use that acronym false expectations appearing real all the time. It's I've now created a movie in my mind about a future event that hasn't happened that's debilitating or mobilizing me in the present and i'm the producer i'm the director and i've cast myself as the victim in a fucking movie in my mind where i'm getting my ass kicked
Starting point is 01:53:14 and so the four stages are functional situation awareness i need to manage the fear spike so it's fear so we have fear spike fear, and then functional movement as the last, as the last one. So that's the shout out to CrossFit is it's got to be a functional movement. And what is functional? It's going to be based on the scenario. Do you need to run here? Do you need to charge the threat? What is the safest thing that you can do here? And then when you, when you figure out what that plan is you need to deploy it that's the ignition for that is managing your fear fuck fear face it understand it control it know it
Starting point is 01:53:51 i mean you have very nice hands thank you the the the ability for you to separate your pinky from your ring finger is kind of phenomenal it probably almost looks terrestrial, extraterrestrial. It's probably no one's ever said. I realize now it's like that's the spear position, right? We push away danger and our fingers splay. And when you hit that finger splay position, you're actually recruiting more of the extensor chain. So you have more, not like that no wrists i'm just playing
Starting point is 01:54:26 with my fingers don't tell me what to do okay you make sure you got no wrist on that so you're doing you're kind of like like this and you're probably that's probably maybe genetic that's how i run my business okay my only fans israel adesanya said he he had uh recently in an interview that's 185 pound champion in the UFC he said I want to go in the ring and show off I'm my best when I'm showing off and I guess in your language that would be when he's he's not in a fear state he's not he's not he's not he's not in a fear state right but he said that before his last fight that a lot of people thought wasn't a very good performance, although he won. True.
Starting point is 01:55:06 Right. True. So, Hey, look at my sign. The lighting changed. Right. Yeah. Fuck fear. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:55:13 So yeah, you want to be careful. Words are icon. Words are icons. Right. So we want to be careful with, you know, like hitting that flow state and being in that flow state uh is is is cool but we can you didn't like that so are you saying you didn't like that his description of that that i like to be sure i don't and this is just maybe i'm old school in my my integrity um i would i
Starting point is 01:55:41 again it might be semantics like like i like when my wife comes to the seminar, cause I show off for her, right. I'm funnier. I'm more energy. I want, I want her to look at me and go, that's my man. I want to have sex that night. Sure. Yep. Yep. Yep. And, but I would never describe it as, as publicly, I wouldn't say I'm showing off. I'm, I would, I would, and maybe it's just old school semantics, but I go, you know, like she brings the best out of me. You too. The, the, the, the, like she's the muse, right? I do all this. I, I, I want her to go, wow. Like, wow, that was a really good post. Wow. You know, you look good today. I, you know, I don't want her to go hey are you still watching what you're eating and working out oh my god i guess not if you're asking
Starting point is 01:56:30 me right right right right and and but i would never it's again it's semantics i would never say yeah traditional martial arts showing off is not good you're supposed to be humble right it's sort of the school you're raised in yeah but like like it's him saying i i i want to feel like an artist and my my my if i were like his manager i go hey dude don't say show off because you know it's not about being woke and saying the right thing it's like but let's be a little bit more metaphysical and esoteric here and we want to hit that flow state you're an artist and your opponent's face and ribs are your canvas and you want to paint on it right yeah yeah yeah yeah i mean i like that because showing off always has a you know the what is the uh um what's that
Starting point is 01:57:19 biblical expression the uh the uh uh pride comes before the the fall or or i forget it i don't i don't read the bible but there's this idea of of gloating and pride and being prideful and flaunting it um anyways i i just wouldn't i didn't like i heard that little quote too i i uh it didn't turn me on. I wonder if, um, speaking of the Bible, I was wondering if, um, you know, like, uh, Pride coming through for the fall, I think. Oh, let me, let me ask you this. How are you on time? I feel like your wife's over there telling you you have to do something. No, she came to say hi to you. Let me check.
Starting point is 01:57:58 My next meeting is, uh, my next meeting. It's 4th of July. You don't have any meetings. You're getting a handy and getting drunk today. It's July 5th dude oh i'm i'm good till uh for another 20 minutes okay good i only have three minutes okay i'm uh oh shit i really am supposed to take the kids to the aquarium okay listen listen to this one there's this thing that jewish parents and black parents tell their kids. And of course, I'm hugely grossly stereotyping. I don't give a fuck. Don't ruin my story.
Starting point is 01:58:32 My parents will tell their kids the world's a really fucking hard place. People are going to be racist and prejudiced against you because you're black. And they tell their kids that when they're five. And the Jew parents tell their kids the same thing. Everyone fucking hates a Jew. The world's going to be a horrible place for you and and those two those two and i'm sure there's other people who get it too right i'm sure there's other ethnicities races religions that get that too but i hear that from a ton of my jew friends and a ton of my fucking melanated friends and i just think man you are really fucking up. No one ever told me that, Hey man, you're going to
Starting point is 01:59:08 struggle getting pussy. Cause you're only going to be five, five. I had to find it out on my own. So I'm so much happier that I found it out on my own than someone had to paint that reality for me. No one told me, Hey, seven, when you're 16, your nose is going to grow in. And everyone who thought you were cute is now going to be making fun of you for having a big nose. It was so much better for me not to be prepared for that. Of course, man. That's the fear loop, dude.
Starting point is 01:59:34 Why the fuck are you telling your kids something? I never heard that stuff. At the end of the day, it's all made up, because if I'm the only guy on the planet, or if everyone on the planet has bigger noses than me, then I'm the guy with the small nose. Right. And it's like you're feeding your kids this fucking narrative like
Starting point is 01:59:48 what's the difference between warning your kids about something and then as opposed to giving them a narrative that they have to carry with them the whole life as some sort of truth and then you start and then but then you start looking for it so yeah yeah yeah you start looking for it exactly so so in in i'll give you a self-defense example everyone when we teach let's say uh like weapon protection i'll ask the group how many of you've been told by your martial art instructor in a knife fight expect to get cut um and every single one of them gets told that in a knife fight expect to get cut like i go why why i've been in three knife confrontations i've never been cut i've cut myself with knives i've cut myself fucking around and shaving you've cut yourself
Starting point is 02:00:32 with 100 razors right um but like i thought about that i go i don't it's already scary enough why the fuck should i be more scared would you this is great. And I was like right out of our seminar and you'll appreciate this. I go, if I go, how many of you have kids? So like half the group has kids. If you take your kids to this, like a swimming lesson and the swimming instructor, you're sitting on the bench and the swimming instructor says, I got it from here. He goes, listen, you're going to go swimming, expect to drown but like you immediately
Starting point is 02:01:05 go whoa what did you just tell that kid would be terrified of the water right but they you would never tell a surfer expect to get bit by a shark right we think that on our own right yeah right but i don't need there there's there's already the fear and the risk there and this is this is why the the whole no fear program is is the most important shit we do, because it's a way to look at fear from when you get the first physiological change, also the psychological change. What is my body telling me? What do I need to understand here? What do I need to learn? That's the research. That's the fuck fear. But 100%, we tell people erroneous beliefs. And this is stuff we started teaching everyone in the 80s,
Starting point is 02:01:47 Siobhan, our whole cycle of behavior, the neural circuitry of fear. This is the fear loop. What erroneous belief are you carrying into this confrontation? Is it that size doesn't matter? Well, size fucking does matter. That's another martial art myth. Size fucking matters that's why there's weight classes right but uh no i i agree with you uh we we regurgitate shit and then that becomes self-fulfilling or or incredibly distracting because it's another voice in your head that doesn't need to be there you're a good dude you too man you've been on this podcast before do you do you remember don't lie yeah yeah yeah no i was when you first because i don't remember i told my mom last night you were coming back on she's like he's been on before i'm like he has yeah you were 500 shows in
Starting point is 02:02:40 you're just you're just another two hours to me tony i get it and i noticed that you're all caps and i'm low case it's a little bit of a dominance i established christy why i can't tell you how much it was a pleasure meeting you this weekend by the way you're awesome thanks for coming up and say hi to me um i'm glad i got to hug you you're a cool chick uh thanks for coming on thank you buddy i feel like uh i feel like we got into a flow state a couple times i feel like my my gun was coming out of its sheath pretty smoothly a few times yeah your gun condom i i had some other videos i wanted to show you um uh i wanted to show you this one of two two uh I wanted to show you. I wanted to show you this one of two. I wanted to show you this one. But I'll show it to you now, and then we can talk about it the next time you're on.
Starting point is 02:03:31 Okay. But I'll only have you on again if a lot of people text me and be like, hey, have this guy on again. Okay. Because I'm just about the numbers. But have you seen this video yet? Oh, no. It was just yesterday or something was released. There's audio, right? Yeah her a colonizer. This is Portland.
Starting point is 02:04:12 Hey, dude, if that's my mom or my sister or something, I'm telling him, okay, I'm going to give you 30 seconds. If that's your mom, we'll listen for 15 seconds more, and then I want you to give that lady some advice. Everyone needs to hear how angry you are, but it's not about this. Everyone needs to hear how angry you are, but's not about this everyone needs to hear how angry you are but it's not about this she said to him while he's yelling at her she's a white colonizer it looks like he just got out of that car right yeah do you know what's going on what the context is no i no i don't i in my mind i just tell the story that it's two people there they had some sort of argument while they were driving they both got out of the car and he's telling her you white lady you don't feel the pain of my people and she's like she's trying like she read out of some like woke book just be present be loving listen to them but he's woke too isn't he oh yeah yeah the whole thing it's
Starting point is 02:04:59 two people with mental illness having it out in the street but if that's my mom or my sister if that lady has kids she hates her kids if you're a mom never put yourself in that situation what are you doing you got to get home and take care of kids for another 30 years well if they're like me they stay at home till they're 34 that shit's insane i watched i was in a restaurant the other night with jess sitting in a bar and uh woman sits down and she turns over to me and she goes, and I go, Hey, what's up? She goes, uh, notice that the, uh, the bartender hasn't come over to take my order yet. It's because I'm a woman. Yeah. That kind of shit. Like, like, and I look at her and I go, I'm he's over there talking to that table, taking her.
Starting point is 02:05:45 I think it's because he's busy. Not because you're a woman. Yeah. And she just like went on insane. And even if that was true, you have to ask yourself, and this isn't me. This, I have taken this from, from someone else. Who would you be without that thought? Would you be a better person without that thought?
Starting point is 02:06:06 But that's the critical thinking, which is like people. Yeah. You have to you have to you have to transcend that. It's OK to have that thought. Let it go. You have a choice. It doesn't have to be your reality. You don't have to.
Starting point is 02:06:19 That's victim mindset. It's victim mindset. Hey, and you have no control over it. Do you know how many guys did talk to you because you're a woman and you got a pussy? Right. How about that? Well, she hates men, obviously. Hey, when you see – oh, man.
Starting point is 02:06:38 I got to go to the aquarium. I can't do this. Okay. Go take care of your kids. I love you, buddy. Thanks for coming on. We got one here Have Tony on again
Starting point is 02:06:47 I know but she does This chick doesn't count This chick loves This chick is so fucking cool She loves the show She doesn't count Yeah yeah I just
Starting point is 02:06:54 She doesn't count And she feels pressured Because she's in the room with you right now To say something nice about you She didn't count So one person wants to be on again I'd give that a.3 That's a third of a person.
Starting point is 02:07:05 Thanks, though. Appreciate it. I will talk to you soon. Love you, buddy. Peace out. Take care. Love you.

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