The Sevan Podcast - Bruno Marins | Games Bound

Episode Date: July 17, 2024

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it's a sad podcast show it's a sad podcast show everybody's welcome peace and love it's a sad podcast show bam we're live good morning yo oh shit uh it looks like we're down on Twitter That's not good Oh we're down on both our Twitters No Twitter, no Rumble this morning Devastating Kells I'm excited for this one, good morning everyone 7am Pacific Standard Time Live to you from California

In the comments yesterday Someone writes Someone writes Someone writes Yesterday, someone writes. Someone writes. Someone writes. So yesterday, my pump went out. Not my pump. My pump didn't go out.

Basically, I have a well, and there were some issues. The way a well works, at least the way my well works, is water comes from out of the ground of planet Earth. It goes into this tank. And in this tank, there's a bladder in there that fills with air like a balloon. And when you need water, the balloon fills up and pushes the water from this tank into my house. Right? So just imagine this massive container. It's about a hundred gallons. There's a balloon inside of it and water inside of it. And when you need the water, the balloon fills up and pushes the water to my shower. I just took a shower for the first time in three days. And yesterday on the show, at the end of the show, I called the company that was going to come out to my house and see what the fuck was going wrong.

And they said it's going to take two or three days. And I ain't going to lie to you. It wasn't just me who shit outside. I cannot confirm or deny that my wife also shit outside. But there was some shitting going on outside in the yard. Savvy, why don't you just drive to Starbucks and do it? What are you, some sort of savage? Said one of my friends yesterday. So they said that maybe I called them yesterday at the end of the show and they said maybe they could come today, but probably not the next day. And they were giving me all these excuses for people for why they couldn't come. One guy had to be rushed to the emergency room.

Another guy had a broken arm. Another guy blah blah blah blah blah. You don't have a neighbor who could help you out with the bathroom. Says Patrick Lang. You know what's cool is. My neighbor actually came over. And he actually threw his hose over the fence. And he was explaining to me how I could use his well water.

By taking his hose and pumping it into my system. But I'm not. I'm not. I'm not But I'm not doing that. I don't want to use my neighbor's well water. He's done so much for me. He's been such a good dude. But great question. And they offered, they said, come over and take a shit or a shower whenever you want.

And I'd been taking my kids over to my mom's house to shower and my wife over there Uh, don't you have a bucket so what's funny is yesterday I set up a bucket I laid a bunch of paper towels in a bucket and then some wet ones and I was going to take a shit in it My wife goes don't do that. Just shit in the yard Uh death before dishonor it's your yard yard. Shit. It will. Thank you. And that I did Anyway, so, uh, I called yesterday after the show. They said they couldn't come yesterday They said they probably couldn't come today and that they would come tomorrow So yesterday

Uh And I was I was I was working out. I was doing, what was the workout I was doing? I was doing 15 front squats with a 40-pound D-ball. I hold it in the front. And what was the other movement I was doing? I think I was doing five chest-to-bar pull-ups with this kind of grip, regular grip, on alternating minutes for 20 minutes.

And I was like six minutes into it, and I was just getting warmed up. I'd just ridden the assault bike for 100 calories. Actually, I think yesterday I rode like 122 in 10 minutes. And I was all warmed up and sweating. And then I got, I don't know, five or six rounds into this workout. And then I was feeling really good. And I, there's a guy, I, my garage doors open and then past the skate ramp, there's a fence and some grapevines and all this shit. And I see a guy poking his head over the fence and he's like hey homeboy and I'm like hey what's up and there's like I'm like no no one ever comes to my house right I'm out in the middle of fucking nowhere and I realize at that point when he says that to me I realize it's the pump dudes and I go over and I open

the gate and there's two vatos and a white alcoholic really cool dude skinny little white dude old dude he was probably 30 looks like he was 60 he had one of those bulbous red noses and they come in and I'm like ecstatic to see them I am so fucking happy. And I let them in and they immediately within 10 minutes figure out what's wrong.

And they get it working again. And they tell me that basically that balloon that fills up and contract fills up and contracts. It's tired. I need an, I need a whole new, like, uh, uh, whatever that thing is called that a hundred gallon steel container. I need a new one of those. And I had looked online before and it told in the life expectancy of one of those, whatever that thing is, was eight years. And I've lived here eight years, at least eight years, so I know that that tank was maybe ten years old. And someone in the comments,'m trying i want to i need to find it uh god i wish i could fuck i want to i want to read it to you exactly let me go let me go to that was that was yesterday's video at this time um what was that video called? Review of TD. Oh, maybe it was the review of the TDC.

Maybe it was that one. It was in, was it in that? Um, oh, here it is. Generic four letter program company. Generic four letter program company. You fucking idiot. Right. Eric for that, a program company, you fucking idiot. Right? You tip your maintenance workers.

You're contributing to this outrageous tipping culture. Like what are the, what the fuck are you? So when the, when the guys left, uh, I didn't have any cash. I had 20,

I only had $20 in my wallet. So I gave them the $20, and I gave them each a case of fucking FitAid, my prized possessions. I love my FitAid. By the way, 40% off. Right there, 40% off. How have you not bought some FitAid yet? Speaking of FitAid, Paper Street Coffee this morning, my second cup.

I'm not okay this morning. I didn't sleep so good. Ah. I went to bed late and I got up like. I was watching the Republican National Convention on YouTube. And I stayed up way too late. And then I got up like five times in the middle of the night. Anyway, you're saying I'm contributing to tipping culture.

And you're calling them maintenance workers Like I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about Three fucking grown ass Fucking men Showed up to my house To help me and my fucking family out With water Agawa

As they say in Armenian Chur Wish I knew how to say it in Japanese And I was crazy appreciative Crazy appreciative Damn this water This coffee's hot today god that's nice i even have a paper street yeti and you know what's crazy um i've had this cup i've used this cup i have three of these and i've

been using them every day for three years and uh this hasn't faded at all i don't know i don't know if they sell these um and now someone's thinking like i I don't see these guys as fucking uh Maintenance workers and I don't see it as tipping They're the dudes who came to my house Who have fucking more balls than fucking me who assisted me and my family of getting water So my wife doesn't have to shit in the backyard and I don't have to fucking go to Safeway to fucking buy cases of water. Tipping culture. I really hope generic four letter program company that you are a fucking European cuck. I hope no fucking American thinks like that. Tipping. How about just thank God there's some fucking real vatos

and fucking whiteys that can come to my house and make up for my fucking inadequacies. Good morning, Jake. Hi. I love you, buddy. I love you. How about I'm just fucking thankful how about I'm just a fucking civilized human being I can't I can't share you probably the same piece of shit that thinks you have to put away a cart

You live by some sort of fucking rules and some sort of fucking box your fucking government puts you in. Extra sloppy. Seve, I own an HVAC business and I have done this for years. I wish so much that people would stop trying to tip us. Cool. And you have that right to wish that too. I have an idea. How about just be an asshole and deliver horrible service stop wearing shirts

that are so tight so that people can see your six pack you fucking slut you can do whatever you want I'm not tipping maintenance workers I'm not feeling obligated

I'm fucking ecstatic that my wife doesn't have to shit in the backyard I think my wife is kind of proud of herself though I'll tell you something really weird you want to know something really weird I'm going to get in trouble for this one yesterday when I shit in the yard

I can't tell you Yesterday when I shit in the yard When I came back in the house My wife had already picked it up That's it Okay I can't believe I shared that That was too intimate I probably need two

I probably need two HGR CBD's This morning I know that is sad right That's sad I should have my man card pulled yesterday because my I was gonna shit in a bucket and my wife told me no I was like she treated me like a fucking dog She's like go shit over there and she points to this spot When when my gardeners come and cut my grass

I always have them like dump it in the backyard Like I haven't spread the dead grass out in the yard like where there's not grass like out in the orchard where a lot of the fruit trees are and so what you walk back there and it's so nice i know i christine i would have picked up my own deuce i would have picked it up i would have I would have. It's probably Gabe's fault. She probably had two cups of fucking Paper Street coffee and just went on a shit picking up mission. Hey, and you know what I told her?

I said, hey, what were you doing in the backyard picking up shit? She's like, I was picking up shit in the front yard. And she goes, what were you doing? I go, what were you doing picking up shit? And she goes, I was just out there picking up some dog poop. And she goes, what were you doing? I go, what were you doing? Picking up shit. And she goes, I was just out there picking up some dog poop. And I'm like, you do that? And she's like, yeah. And I was so bummed because anyone who comes to my house, anyone who comes to my house,

like if you're here for more than for sure, if you're here for a day, if you stay the night, you'll see me picking up poop. I'm crazy about poop picking up. Like I have just so many plastic bags and I never want poop anywhere in the yard. So I walk the yard. It takes like probably 15 minutes, at least twice a day. And I carry a pair of clippers and I water plants and clip branches and I pick up poop. Cause I don't want my, I don't want anyone. I want the kids to everyone to be able to run freely wherever you want and not have to be looking down at the ground. I want everyone to be able to run freely wherever you want and not have to be looking down at the ground.

No thorny plants and no poop. And I was just bummed that my attention to picking up the poop isn't so solid, so good, so thorough, so complete that she actually would ever have to pick up poop. I probably knew it. I was probably in denial. Anyway, fuck you. I'll give people money wherever, whenever and however I want. Hey, uh, extra sloppy. Why don't you want people tipping you?

Uh, Patrick Lang. Uh, I take my dog for a walk two times a day. I let him shit on people's lawns and I never pick it up. I've never take my dog for walk two times a day. I let him shit on people's lawns, and I never pick it up I've never walked my dog Not once I Didn't hide II hide II says Haley come live with me. I won't make you pick up my shit Jesus listen uh uh listen i don't make her uh jake chapman you shit in the front yard yeah i don't to be honest with you i we don't really even really have a front yard or backyard or

side yard it's just just a yard where's this guy where's this guy from uh who's coming on the show today? Franco. Franco Bruno? No, Bruno? Is he from South America? Oh, yeah, Bruno Marins. Third place. Tied for third with Matt Souza.

That's crazy. with Matt Souza. That's crazy. Oh, and he tied for second place, but he only had one first place, and Souza had two first places. Souza had three first places. Wow.

All right. Anyway, that's um that's um that's that don't tell me oh yeah extra sloppy what why don't you like people um giving you money that's weird remember uh someone told me this once um if uh god gives you gifts and you don't accept them, he'll quit giving them. Uh, my dog poops, uh, near the fence, only, only one 20 foot spot or up in a corner where the kids don't go and never trained her. She just does it. I used to have a great Dane like that.

Isn't that awesome? I had a dog that always went to the furthest part corner of the yard and took a deuce. Okay. I had a dog that always went to the furthest park corner of the yard and took a deuce. Evie, Seve, ever tip your CrossFit coach? I don't think so. I can't remember. I don't think so. I can't remember. I don't think so. I don't ever remember doing that. We're played plenty fair wage for the work we perform.

Oh, God. You are a fucking bitch. Sorry. Sorry, Sloppy. That doesn't even make sense. Heidi Kroom is contributing to tip culture. Thank you. Pat Lang. And look, guys.

I give all the CF coaches gift cards at Christmas. Yeah, you want to know something? I visited a jiu-jitsu gym, and my kids went there for two weeks, and it was fucking crazy expensive. I want to say it was like $600 dollars a week for all three kids and um i bought all the instructors that they had there like a fifty dollar um or twenty five dollar i can't remember uh pete's uh gift cards because there was a pizza across the street sorry gabe sorry gabe sorry Gabe sorry Gabe

so what so what extra sloppy says you're tipping a guy making 130 bucks an hour so fucking what just a second I tip your mom too motherfucker hi Bruno nice to see you good morning I've never had a prostitute Tip your mom too, motherfucker. Hi, Bruno. Nice to see you. Good morning.

I've never had a prostitute, but you think you should tip a prostitute? Why can't you just give money to people when you want to give money, when you're appreciative? Douche canoes. Sebon tips 30% at restaurants unless the waitress has a nose ring. Okay, now I'm back. Let's go.

Let's go. Hey, dude, how are you doing? I'm doing awesome. Dude, you crushed... Dude, you're a serious threat. You crushed the semifinals. Good job, Bruno. Thank you very much, man. Thank you very much. I did it. Hey, Bruno, will you say your name for me?

How you say it? You guys can say Bruno. It's okay. You know, like the real translation of my name to English is Bruce. So I'm supposed to be called Bruce in English. Bruce. But let me hear you say Bruno. Bruno.

Bruno. Yeah. I think that's the kind of name that it just increases my testosterone when i say it you actually have to look on the you no seriously because on the you you have to use a deeper voice right yes your name you bruno you actually lower your voice it's it's it's like uh it's like a pretty like you wouldn't name a chihuahua bruno it would have to be like a pretty – like you wouldn't name a Chihuahua Bruno. It would have to be like a Great Dane or a Rottweiler or something, right? It's a big dog's name.

A Rottweiler. That's nice. Yes, I like it. It's a big dog's name. It's not a little dog's name. You're right. I agree 100%. How did you get the name?

Who – oh, don't – are you mad at me? Look at that stare. Oh, there he goes. Jesus. South America just got cell phones last week. So Bruno's still learning the ins and outs of the functionality of his phone. I think he has an iPhone. How about in that, how about in that Trump for Latinos song, the guy says he got an Obama phone, but now Trump's given us the ability to get our own shit.

Yeah, boy. Oh, yeah, he's in UAE. Thank you. I only know he's in UAE. Yes, I am in UAE. You're right. Because I watched your – this morning, Kipping It Real, I watched your interview. Thank you very much.

Hey, who named you Bruno? Who are you named after? I think it was my mother. I'm not sure exactly who did it, but like my name means brown in Italian. It means brown? Yes. The brown man. Yes.

It's not like a huge meaning, you know. That's okay. That's what we call everyone south of the border here in California. We call you brown people. All of you. Okay, that's it. I just finished my second session of training, and I did 495 pounds for two back scratches.

I just posted on my Instagram. If you go there, you got it. A 495, two back scratches. Yes. I just did it right now. Back scratches. Back squats. Back squats.

If I say squats right here, everybody start to say like that's a whiskey name you know to make joke of me go ahead this would kill me Dang, dude. You're a beast. Good job. The second one was tough. Hey, Bruno, do you have to be careful now as we approach the games that you also don't hurt yourself? Like, you don't get too crazy now that you made it, and you're just like, hey, I need to just be smart with my training, smarter than ever?

Now that you made it and you're just like, Hey, I'm going, I need to just be smart with my training smarter than ever. Like, to be honest, I'm giving out every day. Maybe that's dangerous. Like you said before, but I think it's the best way to do right now. You know, like my first time in the game and I want to show off. I want to show everything I have. No fear, anything else. Just go there and do my best.

I'm trying to remember whose interview I saw. Oh, it was Pat Ellis. You sound like Pat Ellis from Australia. He said that too. He said, hey, I'm not just going there to work out. I'm going there to prove to myself and people that I belong there. And that sounds like your motto too. You're not just going there to be like,

okay, I made it, give me my shirt. You're right, you're right. I agree 100% with him. I want to show that I belong to be there with all the other guys. Not only because I did a good semifinal, because I know I can't do anything else like I know all my PRs I know my cardio workouts are so

nice so I know yes there's my results there just let's check and how can I say like I mean everything I do everything I'm training it's exactly where the guys are showing off right there exactly what they are doing also I think they can go and compete so nice

against everybody right there you're born and raised in Brazil yes and how old are you now 27 exactly oh it's is today your birthday no no no oh my god march 15th yes i'm march 16th oh really yeah man that's crazy so you're. So you're very creative, you're very kind, and you have a huge penis. Thank you. You're right. Yeah, I know my Pisces well.

I'm sure. I know my Pisces well. We're very creative and very kind. Yes. Kind, you know, you're right. Bruno, how does someone who trains in Brazil, born and raised in Brazil, end up in the UAE? Can you tell me about that journey there?

Yes. Everything started when I was in the semifinals last year and I received a proposal to leave Brazil and to start to give classes outside, just three classes in a day for five days in a week and getting two thousand dollars per month and I thought that was a good opportunity to get some money some easy money have time to train and that's it that was a thought. Who made that proposal? The guy, his name is a little bit hard to say.

Arjuna. Arjuna is like someone from some religious scripture. He's like a warrior. You are right. Yes, exactly. How do you know that? Because I used to be a hippie. I love religious scripture. Man, you know that.

Yeah. You're Christian. You're right. Arjuna was an ancient prince of the Kuru kingdom located in present-day India. Okay. That's it. Yes, exactly. So this guy, Arjuna, he lives in UAae and he lives like 13 years right here and you didn't know him but he just saw your result i didn't yes exactly so how does that happen you're just hanging out at home and you and you look in your email and there's an email from some guy with a

weird name i saw my instagram idm there was a message there i just read and man that's crazy it's like sounds fake but let's see i don't know let's give a try then he called me to talk to me about the propose come here let's go let's try it then okay i accept let's do it man sounds so good better than i'm doing here like i was working in brazil like around five hours in a day training studying was so tough then i had this huge opportunity so i just go ahead go ahead i just locked my university, you know. Just locked my graduate. I was doing engineering. Just locked it and came here. By lock it, you mean you just postponed it. You froze it. You pulled it out of school. Yes, yes. I froze it. Okay. And so you're an engineering student, so you're smart. You're going to school in Brazil. You get this message. And now you've been – have you been there for one year now?

One year. A little bit more than one year. I think one year and one month right now. Did you think that the DM was fake? Were you like, this is crazy? First time, yes. I thought. Of course I thought. I said, man, that sounds crazy. You work three hours in a day, get $2,000 in a month.

I don't know, man. Someone is cheating on me. I don't believe that. But I talked to him, you know? I tried to convince myself that it was real, but I had nothing to prove. So I had to go ahead and check. And that's how I felt when we got our first sponsors, when Paper Street Coffee and CA Hormones called me.

And they said they want to give me money for my podcast. I was like, can you repeat? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's so nice. So, is Sousa there also? Yes. He lives right

here with me. How did that happen? How did he end up in UAE also? Let me show you Okay Okay, yeah, show us This is cool Look That's a nice place, dude

That's a nice place Look All his shoes from the last games Careful, those will lower your testosterone Those Noble Careful with those Careful, yeah, you're testosterone Those noble Careful with those Careful, yes Here is my room

Okay Side by side How did he end up there, Bruno? Look It was so strange Because last year I took fifth in some finals and he took second. Okay.

He beat me. And, like, that was crazy. Yeah. So when I received the opportunity, he was working here close to me. And this guy talked to me also. I had, like, I had nothing to prove that the proposal was real, but I had Kali right here. So I messaged him to check.

Kali, is this real? That can really happen? Yeah. And he just told me, yes, Bruno, come here. It's so nice. We're going to train together. We're going to have time to hang out, do a lot of things. The money is good. Live here is so cheap. And yes, that's so nice. We're going to train together. We're going to have time to hang out, do a lot of things. The money is good.

Leave here so cheap. And yes, that's all true. And that's how everything happens. Now we live together. That was crazy. And we train together. We did it to the semifinals. And we made games together.

That was so nice. So Arjuna called him the year before and gave him the same proposal one year earlier? Perfect. Perfect. You're right. Wow. And did you know Souza back in Brazil? No.

I met him in a competition, but I didn't know him. We saw before. And we know that. And he's cool? He wasn't threatened by you coming? he wasn't threatened by you coming? he wasn't threatened by you coming? yes of course a lot

and he helped me a lot right here but he wasn't threatened by it? he didn't tell Arjuna no? no he didn't wow crazy crazy that's crazy you're right any other Braz brazilians there yes they're julia julia cato also she's going to the games and uh and she got the same did she when you

compare notes she got the same call yeah the same call before Exactly the same one from Arjuna. Wow, crazy. That's crazy. Yeah, and she took second. Yes, and you know something crazy? Everybody who Arjuna calls, one year after go to the games. I don't know how. Any non-Brazilians in the group? No, just us us that's it just the three of you yes is she in that house also no she isn't because she's married and and like they are a little bit

different comparing to us they they have their own style she and her wife uh his wife sorry his husband not wife because before she i'm not sure but she had a wife something like that okay people are like this today oh so so julia cato used to be a lesbian and now she's straight yes not used to be how do you call that's straight? Yes. Not used to be. How do you call that? Bisexual, I think. Oh, yeah, yeah. She's open-minded.

Exactly. Okay. This is incredible. So you're there a year and you're training. And what do you think about training the classes? Who are the people you train? What do they look like? Are they locals to the UAE?

Yes, they're locals. people you train what do they look like are they locals to the uae are you yes they're locals some people are from europe like ireland french italian german russian there's a lot of russian guys right here all these kind of people there's many people right here and if you go to dubai like it's crazy because you don't see local people right there you just see like foreigner everywhere so so you you're there for a year and then when um and are you are you fitter than you are last year i am much more so it was a fantastic year and you and suza killed it how long were you there before you and suza started training together maybe four months i think i'm not sure exactly i'm so bad with time but around four months okay so tell me about that so you get there you live in the same house with him but you're not training with him for the first four months it's all it's sort of like are you just feeling each

other out like seeing what's okay and what's not yes Yes, you know, I didn't know him before. So we started meeting each other. And the first appearance when I saw him training, like in the same place I was training before, I thought like, oh, I don't know what he's training, but I think he's from Proven. And I have another coach. Like I do a different program.

So how can we do – how can we make it happen? How can we make, like, me and him training together? Like, believe me, that was one of the first – the first thing I thought when I saw him training with me. Like, the first week we trained together at the same space but not training the same program, I thought that, like, how can we do to train together? And, like, Kali, he's so, how can I say, strict.

He do his training and nothing else, you know? I'm a little bit more flexible. Like, if I see something good and I think that's nice for my body, I will change. I will switch. Or I will do something else. You know? And I remember the first time I was seeing him doing

tag boards and I thought, man, that's so nice. For how long I'm not playing that kind of exercise? I will do that. Hey, Souza, can I train with you? kind of exercise. I would do that. Hey, Souza, can I train with you? So that's exactly how we start. I start to enter in his training some days. And he was cool with it.

He was so cool. And then we start to get more like friends, really friends. We start to go to the supermarket together. We start to talk about CrossFit, talk about life, family, anything else, any kind of situation, conversation we was having before. Yeah, that's cool. That's so cool. Hey, Bruno, is there an elite training camp in UAE?

Is there an HWPO or a Mayhem or a Misfits or a training think tank? Is there a group there? I don't know. To be honest, maybe no because this country is so small, and I never have seen anything like that right here. Mayhem, Pruger, or something else. Isn't that interesting? It's only a matter of time, right?

Maybe you'll be the one who starts it. It's only a matter of time before someone starts a training camp there. You're right. You're right. Because also there's a lot of games outlets right here, like Luka Dukic. He lives right here like Luca Dukic he lives right here and Arjuna contacted him too? No, no but he lives here

and sometimes other athletes from Europe they come here to compete, last year I took a photo with, this year I took a photo with Chakler he was here she was here before

oh Tia was there yes was she competing no she came to see a competition that she made the workouts

wow that's that's cool um what's what who is this Arjuna guy going

going Instagram and just write B I Who is this Arjuna guy? Going. Going. And just write. B-I-C-H-A-O. B-I-C-H-A-O. Yes. But ciao. Oh, yeah, yeah. Okay, I see him.

You follow him. Go ahead. This is the guy. Okay, hold on one second. Caller, hi. Hello? Caller? Hello?

Caller, are you there? All right, go away. Okay, I see this guy. Oh, this guy's Yoke. And this guy's a UAE? He's a local? No, he's Brazilian. But the first time when I saw him, I thought he was from other where,

because he has a little bit of accent. And maybe that's just because he lives here for like 12 or 13 years. So he lost a little bit of his accent, his Brazilian accent. Maybe. I'm not sure. Okay. So it's interesting. Is that his real name, Arjuna?

He's a Brazilian guy with a bra? Yes. That's his real name. Does he speak English? Yeah, so nice. Oh, I need to meet this guy. So this guy lives there. He's built himself a successful life there,

and now he's giving back to his people in his homeland? Yes, exactly. You said everything. How cool. And how often do you train with him? Yes, we train together. Today, we did it. And he's a pilot?'s a pilot yes a good pilot

have you been in a plane with him no but he's a law lawyer also lawyer yes yeah yeah the name yeah like uh there's something let me tell you something really bad about here. You know, like I learned English when I was a kid, like I started to study English with nine years old when I had nine years old. Yes, that was, but when I came here, people speak English so bad,

so bad. Like there's many Indians right here and many locals. They like, it's so hard to explain, but they speak English so bad. So our English starts to get worse than before. And I was talking to my wife because she's, she's learning English right here. Yeah. And I, and I told her, baby, that's so bad because when you start to talk with someone who speak English

really well, you don't understand anything they're saying. And she got so scared, like, oh, really? Are you serious? And I said, yes, maybe. Is she living there with you, Bruno? Yes, yes, yes, she is. But she's working now. She actually got a job there also in the UAE? Yes, yes. Wow. So let me ask you this. So he invites you there, and then do you say to him, hey, I have a wife? Yes.

And he says you can bring her too? Yes, of course. That's amazing. Yeah, it's like you're living in some sort of imaginary world. You're right. Yeah, like that doesn't happen to people. What a great guy this guy is, this Arjuna guy. He is a great guy.

You need to meet him. If you want to, I don't know, to record an interview with him, just message. I would love to do that. I'll DM him. And then if he asks who I am, you can be like, you can vouch for me.

DM him. I will talk to him also today um Bruno how did you um uh how long have you been doing CrossFit and how did you cross paths with it how was it introduced to you I will explain it's a long way yeah I have plenty of time tell me okay I started CrossFit in 2016 because all my uncles my brother my father all my family was doing CrossFit before and I was just a surfer and a jiu-jitsu fighter. And they started to tell me, oh, Bruno, that like, man,

I'm sure you're going to like this kind of sport. Like exactly what you like, you know? Like work with your body, lift weights sometimes. This is kind of thing. I'm sure you're going to love it. My brother talked to me like that, my uncle's, and I was like, okay, I'll give it a try. Let's go there. And the first time when I went to CrossFit,

I remember the coach was trying to teach me snatches. And man, it was the worst class of my life. I couldn't hold a bar correctly. I was holding like this, like suicide grip. Also, to perform a snatch was so hard. I didn't know

how to do that. Everything was going wrong. I just stopped crossfit for one year. I never came back and he said no i don't want that for my life that's not good just from just from your first uh from your first uh class you're like fuck this yes fuck i don't want to repeat this anymore okay like that's terrible i don't like this kind of thing you guys lie to me everybody lie on me i don't like it and then man after one year i had another opportunity because like i don't i didn't want to come back to crossfit again

to be honest and my ankles started to like to talk to me every day for like so long let's go let's give it a try again that class was like really bad. A hard exercise to learn and something else. I don't remember exactly what they were talking to me. But I remember my brother telling me that. Today, it's like a body weight class. We're going to do squatches, push-ups, pull-ups. All these kind of exercises. And I'm sure you like it. Let's give it a try again.

I think the workout was Cindy. Exactly. Oh, we did a Cindy. Yeah, that's a good one. I love it. You know, I got it. I got in love for CrossFit in that class one year after then my first class. 2017, I just started CrossFit for real. 2017 I just started crossfit for real and do you remember the next time the snatch came up yes I remember the same week like third class I did

but you know I did something so nice before so I was like peaceful ok give me some hard things now I will learn I don't care and I started to learn snatches yes now snatch is a good exercise I really love it you're good with it I'm good I'm look is this um how long were you surfing for man I'm a surfer like

surf was the second sport of my life I started to swim at three years old and then I learned to surf. Is this you? No. Let me see. It's one of my friends, but yes, I surf with him sometimes. And so you were surfing at a really high level. Not a high level

to be honest, but I never competed as a professional in surfing surfing but i did it for many years because i start so young kite surfing also if you start to rolling down you're gonna see is this you with long hair yes holy shit oh so you were already fucking jacked out of your mind why how are you so yoked there just from were you lifting weights already yes let me see the year yes 2020 as i did it okay so you were already doing crossfit there okay okay yes i was okay i want to see i want to see footage of you uh surfing so and and how was your jiu-jitsu how much jiu-jitsu were you doing i started jiu-jitsu? How much jiu-jitsu were you doing? I started jiu-jitsu also so young, around six years old, I think. Then I never stopped to do it.

I competed in some Brazilian championships. Yes, I got some gold medals. That was so nice. South American championships also. Go ahead. Bruno, when you do jiu-jitsu and as a child does it go same in the states it goes white gray yellow yes i got all of them white yellow yes uh then orange green blue purple you got you got a green belt as a child yes of course i got all of them holy shit dude so so you were really serious i mean we don't

we don't really see you don't really see green belts in uh the united states don't see you don't see that anymore yeah okay and then sometimes i'll see an orange belt and and then you know a little more yellow uh uh yellow but um uh yellow but but when you start seeing orange belts and kids you know that they're killers yeah that's crazy yeah right yeah do you miss it no i didn't no you don't miss it you don't miss the interaction the the kind of the camaraderie and the rolling around with the other guys you think you're going to go back to it like i really love it to do crossfit for all my life but i don't miss it i miss more surfing that i miss you know because surfing it's different you're not when you are fighting like there's some competition around like too much testosterone around you know yeah

men's are like this but when you are surfing surfing it's like a peaceful life you just want to ride some waves drop it just talk to your friends swim a little bit it's a different vibe you see those rotola brothers they're basically they got a plate do you know who that is the rotola brothers the jiu-jitsu brothers twins no i don't know okay they're they're twin brothers and they have a place in costa rica and that's what they spend their time i guess getting balance right they spend their in Costa Rica and that's what they spend their time, I guess, getting balanced, right? They spend their time between surfing and jiu-jitsu.

Hey, when you come to the States, what are you going to do after the event? Are you going to stay in the States and maybe do some surfing? Maybe I'll go to Los Angeles because I have some friends there and I'm going to go to a competition. I don't know the name, but I'll tell you. A CrossFit competition? Yes.

Oh, the one that Dylan's putting on, the tier one. The team one. Yeah, it's a team one. Team, yes. Team up two. So you would hang out for, it's about a month after the games? Yes.

Oh, that would be really cool cool i'm going to that too let's go so we're gonna met there yeah hey do you have access to a swimming pool i have we have access to everything right here and it's so nice and what time is it there right now? 6.48 a.m. 6.48 a.m.? P.M. P.M. How is your swimming? Nice. I'm a good swimmer. I'm not a perfect swimmer. But, like, you know, all my life.

So that's helped me to improve my swim a little bit faster than all the other guys. So that's helped me to improve my swim a little bit faster than all the other guys. This Saturday at 8 a.m. Pacific Standard Time, which will be 7 p.m. your time. Okay. On this station, on the Sevan podcast, we do a show every Saturday called Kill Taylor. Kill Taylor, you're right. And we give away money.

This week, it's $3,000. $3,000. All you need is a swimming pool. That's it. Let's go and normally we make people wait in line but if you text me I will push don't tell anyone

because it's breaking the rules I will push you to the front of the line to get a chance to win the $3,000 that's so nice let me tell you last time when I did 3,000 meters I did every 100 for 1 minute

47 seconds. So you're fast. Yes, that's a little bit fast. 3,000 is fast. But you know, I'm so heavy also. So that's making me not be so fast as I could. I'm one...

In pounds, I'm 230 pounds. Holy shit. Yes, that's my body weight. Are you going to be the heaviest athlete at the CrossFit Games? Maybe, maybe, man.

I'm not sure. Travis Meyer looks so huge also, I don't know. No, he's skinny. He's a little pinner. Oh, my God. He's made of balsa wood. He's like a popsicle stick.

Oh, my God. Yes, Travis is a popsicle stick. Listen, how tall are you? Six one. Six. Wow. Yes, I'm not too tall, but a little bit. Hey, but you're so lean also

i look lean but i'm a little bit huge people always say that when they see me on internet and they when they see me on person hey you look smaller on the internet yeah that's crazy yeah you don't you don't present like you're that you don't look 236 one what's crazy is um that and that is it gonna be um muscle doesn't want to be in the water right muscle is difficult in the water right it's difficult but like i told you i started swimming so young so that helps me how big is your wife is Is she tiny? She is. She's so small also. I don't know her height and feet.

Yeah. But she's like, let me try to show. She gets right here and me. Yeah, I saw a picture of her. Yeah, she looks tiny. Look, my cat. Wait, you already have pets there five five of them how are you how long how are you going to bring them back to brazil i don't know let's see look take a look my baby how did you that's a

kitten they are all kittens how did you end up how did you end up with five cats look at man first we had just one right here a male one and then we got another one on the street a female then they had kittens

and that's it how did you end up with the first cat? Let me try to find him. You're going to understand. Like, he's a really handsome cat, a gray one. And Sousa's okay with cats? Yes, he is. Everybody here.

And all five of them are yours? How about Arjuna? He's okay with you having cats in that apartment? No, it's not his apartment, but it's our apartment right here. We have our own apartment. Hey, is that an acceptable animal in the UAE? A lot of people have

cats? Yes. That's so acceptable here. Everybody has many cats. They don't like dogs. That's something from a Muslim. I'm not sure because I don't know anything about their religion. They don't like dogs.

Okay, interesting. So you don't see a lot of dogs. It's culturally not a popular animal. Yes, it is. And in Brazil, they're everywhere. Everywhere. I had seven dogs in Brazil. They're all there with my father. Holy shit, seven dogs.

Holy shit, man. Oh, my goodness. You're right. So your dad has a shovel, and he just spends an hour a day picking up dog shit. Yes. My cats are so cute. They love, they come here.

Some affection. Five cats. Holy cow. Hey, is the plan, how long will you stay there in the UAE? What's the plan? I don't know,

man. I really, to be honest, I want to go to the US. I want to leave there. Because, you know, CrossFit is like, it's something amazing. I have a lot of friends. I don't know there. Because, you know, CrossFit is like something

amazing. I have a lot of friends. I don't know how we're going to do that, but I want to live in U.S.A. Do you know where? Where would you live? Florida? Los Angeles. Los Angeles? Yes, because I have many friends right there. So it's going to be easier for me.

A lot of Brazilian friends. Not only Brazilians, Americans also. And where did you make American friends at? I will explain. When I was young in Brazil, I studied in an American school. In my city,

the school was called International School of Macaia. Macaia was... Yes, Macaia is my city, the city where I'm from. And there, there's a lot of Texan guys. Texans? How can I say that? Yeah, Texans.

Yeah, you got it. Texans, yes. Like my teacher, his name was Randy. The other one, her name was Celia, I think. I don't remember exactly. Rachel, also Rachel. I had many teachers from Texas. And, like, many people there were from U.S., many kids,

because their father, their parents, was there to work on international companies. So they bring their kids and all their kids to the school. In Brazil, we always have the option to choose to learn Portuguese and some other language, Spanish, English, Italian. So when I was young, I chose to learn English and Italian then. But I don't speak Spanish, and that's something so bad because I'm supposed to speak. That's it. So while you were at the school, you met a lot of people from the United States.

Yes, a lot of people. Some of them I don't have contact anymore. I don't know where they are. I have no number, no Instagram, anything. But most of them, I still with some conversations sometimes and that's so nice.

Hey, that was an engineering school, Bruno? No, it was when I was young, nine years old then. And you maintain those friends, those connections. Yes. That's so nice. That's probably the best thing about the internet. Like they didn't have that when I was a kid.

Like when you lost people, you lost them. But for now, kids can keep friends forever. I remember we start our relationship on Facebook. But people are not used to use Facebook anymore. They're not allowed to or they don't? No, they don't. Yeah, they don't. You know that? Yes, exactly. They don't.

I missed Facebook. By the time I got hip to social media, I think Facebook, the Facebook phase had already left. Now the only people I know who use Facebook are people who are buying and selling shit. It's like turned into a flea market, right? Yes, you're right.

Is it like that in Brazil too? There's something called like Facebook Marketplace and it seems like that's where it gets their shit. You see many things too. Many things selling right there, like to buy, these kind of things. You're right. All these kind of stuff.

Interesting. Okay, so the plans to come to the United States and so that would look like sooner than later. Do you have a time limit of how long you can stay in UAE? Two years. That's the deal with Arjuna or

legally they only want you? Legally. It's a legally one, yes. And then is it just like you just have to fly out for a minute and you can come back in? Yes. Okay. I think I need to stay out for three months, then I can come back. Is Arjuna coming to the games?

Yes. Oh, my God. He must be so proud of the three of you. Man, yes, believe me. He got fucking excited when we finished like yes you guys got a fucking three spots what's going on

I don't believe it like you know like we have six individual sports spots for South America and they got three 50% hey did anyone not make it did any of his sponsors not make it?

No, all of them. All three of them? Yes. Yeah, that's wild. Wild, you're right. And does he get a coach's pass? Like, I don't know. But all of us, we had one credential, I think.

And he's going to get it. That's it. Who's your coach? My coach, his name is Eder. He's from Brazil, and he's going. He bought his tickets. And Julia Cato's coach? Who's her coach? His name is João. In English, you guys say John.

I don't know him in person, but he's a nice guy also. Is he Brazilian? No. I think he's Argentinian guy. Does he live in the UAE? I'm not sure.

Okay. You don't train with her? No, I don't. She trains alone. In the same gym? In the same gym, yes. Hey, are there girls in your classes, or do you only teach boys? Like, in my gym gym there's only boys but the one it's close here where i train it's mixed dream but like go ahead no no you go ahead like uh right here is so common it's not rare like it's really common you find woman jeans

It's not rare. It's really common. You find woman gyms, male gyms, these kind of things. And they prefer, local people prefer to be like this. To train separately. Yeah, that's how I understood it. And some women aren't even allowed to train with men, right? Some of the culture is that they have to train alone.

You're right. Most of them. Even here in the States, one of my friends is uh i have a palestinian friend and um his wife always train will only train with women and women coaches and matter of fact there can't even be men while she anywhere near while she's training so if she were to come over and train with my wife i have to be like you know i have to go like this i have to i have to stay in my bedroom i understand yeah that's it so is the heat not going to be an issue for you uae gets hot right you're good man it's fucking hot right here and now let me see it's will check 43 no I will check

don't it's a race 107 yes in 43 degrees holy shit 107 Fahrenheit yes

oh yeah 43 is 109 oh my god yes and are you training outside some to prepare yes we are

we are training running outside and fucking tough man i want to die sometimes i just want to stop and that's it man like my body is almost like uh how can i say burning inside that's it um and and what about your eyes do you wear glass dark sunglasses when you do that no i don't care like the lighting doesn't matter i don't care to be honest about the lighting i just care about the temperature fucking hot burn our body that's like real you don't need too much time like

around two minutes running outside you start to feel your skin like claiming like man stop to do that you you're stupid or something else like dump guy and it's not like and it's not like brazil is a cold country no like brazil it's not cold country but right here we live next to the desert yeah it's crazy um bruno as you as you started pivoting to crossfit did anyone argue against it was anyone like hey no you should stick with uh engineering and you should stick with uh jiu-jitsu and you should stick with swimming did you have any pushback from your family everybody not from not from my family but from people around like why are you doing crossfit what the fuck is that

like just think when i started to crossfit in brazil we had no spots to the crossfit games so it was impossible to go there before and the people was like uh they don't cheating for us when you go to the competition they just some of my friends was like man stop to stop to do that. Let's go study. Like, I don't know, let's do engineering, medicine or something else. It'll be much better for our life. And I said, man, that's not my dream. I want to be an athlete.

And I choose CrossFit, so that's how I'm going to be. I never give up on my dream. I never did it. Believe it. When I started to train, I said said I want to go to CrossFit games and I just stop when I do it when I make it in what year did you decide

you were going to go to the games 2018 oh so right away within a year you're like fuck it I'm taking this to the highest level like 2018 I went to my first regionals as a team. And it was so nice, the vibe, everybody right there, you know?

Like, I was seeing, like, a huge competition, people going to the CrossFit Games. I saw, like, one of my friends, Pablo Chalfon, he went to the CrossFit Games in 2018. He was the first South America when we had the spot again, when the spot came back to us.

Because I think we stayed for two years, no spots right here. We had to go to South USA to compete the South Regional right there. So when it come back, I saw one of my friends going to the games. So that was fucking exciting, man. I feel so happy for him.

And Guy launched into the scene pretty hard, right? He was great at weightlifting. I don't want to take anything away from him about how good he is, but the events that he's good at are very flashy events. He's a beautiful man. So he really exploded on the scene. He moved beautifully. He had that snatch. Was that a big motivation for the Brazilians? Yes. I don't know if you know that, we we started to do crossfit almost together oh I did

before then me at the same gym in Macaia in my city oh no shit and did you were you guys friends

like did you know each other well did you hang out yes we know many times I went in his home before to teach him math chemistry

to teach him math and chemistry yes oh that's many times wow wow what a fucking small world so chemistry to teach him math and chemistry yes wow what a fucking small world so he makes it and he explodes on the scene and he's very popular and he does really well and now that you're competing against him

is the vibe still good a little bit different I think he I'm going to give my opinion he's a little bit rude he's a little bit different no i think he i'm gonna give my opinion he's a little bit rude he's a little bit rude he's a little bit how can i say i don't want to say this word but you know a kind of dumb guy sometimes they don't want to talk to people he thinks like he's the best in the world and that sometimes is

so annoying so you do you do and he wasn't do you think he wasn't like that before do you think all of the attention and fame kind of got to him like he thinks he's like more i mean here's what trips me out i think even the biggest i think even the biggest crossford in the world shouldn't think that they're famous. Yes, yes. You know what I mean? Like, we're just so tiny. It's just like, even if you had 20 million followers as a crossfitter, it's like, who gives a fuck?

You're still, you know what I mean? You're right. You're not fucking Ronaldo where, like, people pay you, like, a billion dollars to hold a tube of toothpaste. And I'm not saying that they're better than you guys. I respect you more than any Olympian. like you're cooler than the olympians but it's like it's not right you know what i mean like like if rolando if rolando or whatever that soccer player's name if he flew into the uae they would shut the airport down for him perfect you know what i mean but sometimes i think the crossfitters get a little confused because someone recognized them at safeway or whole foods yes in brazil like he's

fucking famous man oh he is like he is famous there yes he's fucking famous right right there like when he goes there like oh okay so maybe i should take that back maybe he should have a big head. Yes. You're right. No shit. So people in Brazil, it's a big deal to be Guy because he did so well at CrossFit? Yes. Oh, my God. That explains so much.

Is that why he kind of went crazy a little bit? Yes. That's it. Oh, shit. crazy a little bit yes that's it oh shit right here when you go to the semifinals man there's like 7 000 people they're watching us yeah on live yeah like people just start to say gi gi gi like so loud around like you can say man come on like we are there's many brazilians right here like they don't give a fuck they just say his name all the fucking time wow you know the arena start to shake when he entered in wow yes that's real oh so he probably hates coming to the united states where it's just

like he's just another dude i don't know i don't know. I don't think he likes this kind of vibe in Brazil, you know? Oh, you don't think he enjoys it? No. Because sometimes he do like that for the people around, you know? Like, stop to talk. Like he's being humble. Yes. If they cheer your name, Bruno, you should start pumping your fist and go like this, louder.

Of course, I do that. Wow. That's nice. I like it. Hey, I wonder if that happens to any other athletes in any country. You know, I've heard that about Brazil. I've heard that the semifinals are like the country. You know, I've heard that about Brazil. I've heard that the semifinals are like the best semifinals. I've heard that it's just absolutely insane. I wonder if it's like that for Tia in Australia.

And I just don't have any understanding of that. She goes to Australia and everywhere she goes, someone knows her. That's crazy. You're right. You think it's like that for her too in Australia? I mean, that's a small country too. Yes. I don't know because I'm not sure how CrossFit is in Australia. But in Brazil, it's something huge. You know?

Like, after that, we had a problem before, you remember, with Greg Glassman? Uh-huh. And many CrossFit in Brazil, they stopped to pay the membership. Okay. The CrossFit in Brazil they stop to pay the membership the CrossFit brands and like you find a lot of CrossFit training in Brazil everywhere you go like in my city

my city is a small city in Brazil like there's around 300 300,000 people but like there's around 15 CrossFit right there CrossFit there's only two CrossFit right there, cross training. CrossFit, there's only two or three, I don't know. Are they basically just knockoff gyms, Bruno?

Yes. They've just taken the idea from CrossFit, but they don't want to pay the money. You're right, exactly. But when you do the Open, do you have to go to an affiliate? And, but when you do the Open, do you have to go to an affiliate? Now they give an option to just post a video if you do the workout. Okay. So you don't need to go to a CrossFit gym anymore to do the workouts. So where did you do the Open at this year?

Did you do it in UAE? Yes, I did it right here in Crested Lane. And then you did the quarterfinals there? I did also the quarterfinals. The quarterfinals, that went so nice also. How did you do it? There's one workout. I love it.

Butterfizz and wall balls. I love this one. I'm telling you, you can win the $3,000 on Saturday. I did 16 44 seconds. 16 minutes, 44 seconds I think. But you can check. Don't run my time. Go ahead. Let me see.

Did you place in the world on that? I think I placed in the world, yes. But my final position in the world was like 53. I'm not sure. But check. Just go ahead. Okay. 2024 quarterfinals. Man. Hold on, let me pull this up.

You finished 53 in the world overall? Yes, go ahead, check. What workout did you say was the workout you really liked? Burpees and wall balls. I think it's the workout three. I'm not sure. Okay, we'll click by that in'm not sure You passed by a Brazilian flag Go down

I saw but I didn't read There Up I passed your name No you didn't Go down Maybe I don't know Oh there it is

Did you beat Guy in the quarterfinal? No, so no. Yes, I beat him. So so maybe you're on the first page dude. Yes, maybe go ahead. Let's see I don't remember. Let's see go back to page one. Oh 40 holy shit Wow Yes Holy shit. Wow. Yes. We did it. Look at these.

This is a good name to be by, James Sprague. Yes, that's a good name. I know this guy. He's awesome. This other guy, too. Yellow Hostie, Jelly. Yes. Another great name to be by.

Henrik Hapelainen. Look at you. You know, the last workout was so nice for me because I'm strong. I did 57 reps of clean and jerks. That was the one where you had to do as many as you could? Yes. At the end? Okay.

The remaining time, yes. Oh, so you're stoked. Hey, how is your overall, since you're so big how's your overall like endurance how's how's is the four days gonna kick your ass i mean i guess it's gonna kick everyone's ass but do you have any concerns yes you're right like i have any concerns here to tell me like to be honest i don't know why i train a lot but I'm not a good runner. I have no idea why, but I'm not. Believe me, I train like almost even odd. Like even I train odd, I rest.

Even I train odd, I rest. Like for the roll season. But I'm not a good runner. I'm not bad, okay? I'm not bad. Well, it looks like you have Colton Merton's legs with Andre the Giant's body. You look like you have the legs of a man who's five – you're all torso, right? You're right.

You're right. I have short legs, and that's something that makes me run bad, I think. But look at Colton. Colton took – he has shorter legs than you, and he took fifth at the semifinal next to Fikowski. Also me. I took fourth place on the first workout. I did did a really nice run okay okay but how can i say the guys there they run so nice i know that you know so comparing to like the top 10 i think i'm a bad runner but comparing to the top 20 i'm a good okay okay to million but all the other machines like ski, roll, bike, or eco bike, I'm a tough guy.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I like it. Good. All right. And then the swim, the run swim event, you're going to be – Swim also. Yeah, the water.

I'm going to try to recover something of my positions on the water. You're right. I'm going to enter in the water to kill the guys. I'm going to do my best on the water. Yeah. When do you get to Texas? August 1st.

Okay. So you'll have time to acclimate because you're going to have to get ready for the time. Exactly one week. Exactly one week before the games. And where do you sleep? I don't know.

It's a hotel. I don't know the name, but I need to check right here. I can send you. Are you staying at the athlete hotel? I'm not sure. I don't know. I just searched for some hotels right there with a good price, and I did it.

Oh, you did it. Okay, so CrossFit doesn't say, hey, this is where you're going to stay. No, it didn't. Okay. All right. Well, hey, dude, great meeting you. I can't wait to see you at the games. Are you going to make it past the first cut?

That's exactly what I want. That's my goal. Okay. Like I tell you something, I don't care if people will see this podcast then. Like I did Shad right here in 48 minutes, two seconds. I don't know what kind of twist Dave will make it with doing these workouts, but only the shad one I did in 48 minutes, two seconds. Dude, you're such a stud. You're such a good dude.

I can't even believe you're real. After you did the interview with Dave, you're the most request I got. Everyone's like, hey, dude, you got to meet this guy, Bruno. You should have seen him on Dave's interview. He's so fucking cool. Did you get a lot of good feedback from that? Yes, I did. A lot of good feedback. People

still message me until now. Yeah. That's so nice. I really appreciate this kind of affection. Yeah, people are going to love you in Texas. I can't wait to be there. I'll be the little short guy with the camera. Okay.

Of course, I'm going to see you there. We're going to match. Thank you for coming on. Great having you, and I'll see you in a couple weeks, Bruno. We're going to see you in a couple weeks, man. That's my last tough week of training uh thank you for sharing so much appreciate you i know people are gonna love this interview and uh and i'll see you in a couple weeks i appreciate you also man all right say hi to our say hi to arjuna for me and tell him i'm

gonna reach out to him okay i gotta tell him don't worry okay thank you guys and say hi to suza please say hi to suza also okay okay I'm going to talk to Souza right now Okay cool He's coming home in one hour and One hour and thirty minutes I think He'll be here I'm going to go train now I'm going to finish my session

A night session Yes almost night let me show you Yeah You're doing it there at your house Yes Oh that's beautiful Beautiful Yeah. You're doing it there at your house? Yes. Oh, that's beautiful. Beautiful.

Fucking hot weather. I'm going to close the window. All the ACs are on. Oh. All right, dude. Have a good one. All right. See you, man. Thank you. Bye, Bruno. All right, dude. Have a good one. All right. See you in a minute. Thank you.

Bye, Bruno. All right. He lived up to the fucking hype. Bruno Marins. Damn. Wow. He's pretty easy to like. He's pretty easy to root for.

God. Well, that kind of explains Guy. That's why Guy kind of, like, got unhinged a little bit. He was young and it just got to him. Is that, is that? Um. uh someone just text me uh someday you're gonna realize i need to be on the show oh okay oh good i'll just type back oh good um what other shit do I got going on?

Uh, if you're wondering why I cut it short, it's because today I'm, I'm, I'm feeling a little anxious cause the guy's going to come change the tank. And I know when they do that, they're going to, um, turn off the water. they do that they're going to turn off the water sorry they're gonna turn off the power sorry I'm distracted I'm not all here all right he can't walk down the street in Brazil. It's like many people in the Philippines. Maybe not quite. El Vato is coming.

El Vato. Isn't it El Gato, the cat man? Oh, he needs a shirt. The cat man, El Gato. That's good. Look at ortega letting his creative juices flow he that dude doesn't but uh uh bruno if you're still listening uh you don't have a chance uh to win the 3000 that was just a joke taylor's unbeatable on fucking beatable especially in the water he's the greatest uh male swimmer in the crossfit space taylor self and then and yeah so that's just we know it's a swim workout so you're you're fucked uh

i want to hang out for a little bit more but I feel like I should let me play this okay here we go I love how crisp that photo is of that video of Lazar Jukic. Lazar. Lazar Lazar. I'll learn his name soon. Gotta get your morning shit in, Seve.

I shit every morning, like right when I wake up. I wake up. I have this machine that you put the beans in and push the button. It grinds the beans. I mean, the beans are already in there. My wife puts them in the night before. And then it spits out a, uh, I wouldn't say it's a shot of espresso, but it's a, it's like somewhere in between a cup of coffee and a shot of espresso.

And then while that's pouring, I feed the dog and I go outside. I just walk out my underwear and I always go outside unless it's raining. And even if it's raining, I go outside and I look around in my yard. I love my yard so much. It's so, so crazy. And then,

um, I come inside and I drink the coffee pretty fast. And I start going through all my text messages, not all of them. There's just, there's one in particular that I like to catch up on. It's like the media team's thread. And then once I catch up with that, then I just, I'm kind of chill. Toilet paper, two two videos what did my wife

send me these photos are unavailable I can't see these that guy's a freak 230 is that the heaviest guy is that the heaviest guy going to the crossfit games 230? Does anyone know? Barclay I summons you Barclay, what's barclay's last name barclay barclay. What's that guy's name? Mike helping I summons you to the chat dude i do that every morning uh as well walk through the uh property and the

garden so calming yeah it's so nice oh dale dale barclay that's that's barclay's first name or his last name barclay dale barclay dude oh barclay dale checking oh look there he is look at barclay's like a genie all you have to to do is rub the gummies and Barclay shows up. I just shake the gummy box and Barclay shows up. Wait. Oh, yeah. Barclay Dale. Oh, his first name's Barclay?

Dude, that's a black guy's name, isn't it? Barclay? It's a white dude's last name like if it was Dale Barclay he'd be white but it's Barclay wasn't there a you got a black guy's name am I saying it right it's Barclay or Barclay Barclay sounds like a white dude's name. Am I saying it right? You just got to open up an Excel spreadsheet, and he's the paperclip that used to show up.

Yeah, Charles Barkley. Oh, Charles Barkley? Charles Barkley. But he got a... Yeah, Charles Barkley is such a white guy's name english dude's name right just happens to be i did this uh i hung out with charles barkley at a crossfit gym once i did this video on him i don't even know if it's out there anymore but man i showed up to this crossfit gym and the the you should have seen the way the women acted around him it was crazy and he's no looker

and and and he's and he's broken there's nothing about him that's like he was broken and this was 10 years ago he wasn't um he's not like mobile you know what i mean you got he's like at the 50 yard line of uh joe biden and he's but he's cool but man the the the the way the women vibed him i mean it was a small class i want to say there were 10 people in the class that he was in but i want to say five of the chicks there touched him while i was there and like you know what i mean like gratuitous like unnecessary touching Barclay Dale confirmed Bruno's the girthiest games qualifier

I like that that's awesome okay they like his charisma I mean basically there was this lady there Okay. They like his charisma. I mean, basically, there was this lady there. God, I... And I could be totally wrong, but she was... 45.

I was probably... I was younger than her. She seemed old to me. Hot, huge tits fake tits and she was just basically like like I got like like I was I was uncomfortable with how bad she was like offering up the the the nani the kazoo it's on me on me like i was happy for him and happy for her i mean they look like they were having fun i mean she they seemed like they were on ecstasy at a party but there was still a boundary she was still just like the workout partner maybe he put it to her after class before and and that's what i was picking up on like what do I know you look at grandma's boobs

yeah so fine yeah ponani ponani ponani yeah he guaranteed he has a fucking meat sickle in his pants guaranteed and he was nice Yeah, he guaranteed he has a fucking meat sickle in his pants. Guaranteed.

And he was nice. There was nothing. There was nothing standoffish about him at all. I hope I hope he can settle in and enjoy his. I know we've talked about this endlessly, but all of everyone's, oh shit, Bruno has 40,000 followers on Instagram. I had no idea. Um, everyone's angst comes around thinking about themselves. That's why I brought up the other day when I was talking to, uh, Bob, Bob Forrest about, uh, I forget the lady's name, Byron Katie.ie she has that line who would you be without that thought like there is if you the the daoist saying is stop thinking and all your problems go away like dude your kids died you're devastated stop thinking about it and it goes away i mean i just picked the worst possible example uh you're sad you're depressed you're

telling yourself a story no one likes you you're saying someone's rude to you you think someone was racist to you you think someone's prejudiced to you because you're short or young those it's all your story motherfuckers it's all your story there is there is nothing else except people's stories you're just creating your i don't want to say you're creating your reality i'm not looking at that tree out there and making that tree but the story i tell myself about that tree outside my windows is is mine and the more you tell yourself a story the more the more the more you're going to bring that story into reality you got a story that's like i'm frustrated i'm tired i'm like like you can you can change your story

people hate me people love me people i'm too cool there was a weird moment in that video there was a weird and you got to be careful like like what things, when you do tell a story, you got to be careful where you, where you hang your. Where you anchor your, your, your, your fake reality, right? We're all anchored. We anchor ourselves in our, in our, in certain parts of our story. You know, that's why you don't tell a, well, that's why I was going to say, that's why you don't tell a well that's why i was going to say that's why you don't tell a kid he's stupid because because you don't want

him to anchor that in a story but for some kids that works out well right they then if someone says they're stupid they anchor their story in it and then they just spend their whole life proving the world wrong and become hugely successful but um but it will make you eminently unlikable if you anchor your story in the wrong thing and there was this uh in the bryce smith interview with uh danny spiegel it sounded like she it was very close there were some that she hangs her identity on her 10 million Instagram followers that, that she likes to be nice to people because they don't necessarily, and I'm paraphrasing, but they don't necessarily get a chance to ever meet anyone who has as many

followers as her. I promise you, if you have your shit anchored in some story like that, your life sucks. That's not, that doesn't turn out well for you. You shouldn't anchor there. That's not going to be good. I saw these videos yesterday that I couldn't fucking believe.

You want to see something that's just like I Don't know maybe fuck what do I know maybe some of you were like this too? But I want to show you a video that I can't even believe these are real people on the same planet as me Speaking of thinking like you're better than other people Oh Really you're better than other people. Oh, really? Right now? Okay, guys, got to go. They're shutting down the power. I'll show you the video later. The guy's account is Khalid Attaf and he works in a liquor store and he gives people a pink lighter and they flip out. It's a crazy sequence of videos. I can't believe anyone exists on the

same planet as me that cares if they get a pink light or not. All right. Love you guys. I'll talk to you guys soon. I'm going to come back on later on today at 11 a.m. Uh, Sousa will be here. Um, love you guys. The shitter is not fool. Okay. Love you.