The Sevan Podcast - Darren Thomas | Point Blank Gunshot Survivor - Competing at WZA.

Episode Date: January 1, 2024

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Getting cold in this office. Getting cold in here. Bam. We're live. Good morning. Rebecca, good morning. Mercedes Hall, good morning. Leon, good morning. Alexandra Chasse. Francesca, good morning. Jeffrey Birchfield, good morning. Natalie, good morning. Jeffrey Birchfield. Good morning. Natalie. Good morning. Good morning.

Gary. Gary Carberry. Is that real? Gary Carberry. Good morning. Julia. Good morning. Oh, who's this? A redhead.

Agitor. Agitor. Agitor. Now, listen. I think I'm not even going to. I'm going to be nice. I'm going to be. Sharon O'Sullivan. Good morning.

Susie Borg. Good morning. Holy cow. What happened last night? All these people signed up for the show. What a great. What a great way to wake up mike sour good morning darren thomas good morning hey guys what's up dude how you doing good how's the jet lag yeah it's okay it is well long flight. Dude, I hate going to foreign countries.

If I were you, I'd be like, damn, this sucks. But it's coming to the U.S. for us. At least it's something to look forward to. Yeah, and Florida, good place, right? Yeah, yeah. And then Miami. So I guess it's not a bad trip. Hey, when is Waterpalooza?

It's coming up soon? Yeah, it starts on the 12th. The first day would be actually 11th. 11th of Jan. Okay, you scared me a little bit. When you said you were in the States, I was like, is it this week? So it's not this week. Good.

Why so early? Just for vacation? Why did you come so early? Yeah, so kids to Disney. I guess you can't do the one without the other. Yeah, that's cool. So we've got some friends who've actually arranged some accommodation for us here in Orlando for Disney and then we'll

move on after that. Yeah, that's awesome. Let me put your Instagram. Oh, Caleb, could we change his name to his Instagram account? Yep. Darren qualified for Wadapalooza this year, and this is your first time. Is this your first time competing ever, first time competing out of South Africa?

First time competing on the floor against anyone adaptive. So I've done a competition, but just for fun. And they, you know, just to get the awareness going with the able-bodied athletes. Um, but yeah,

but it'll be my first competition where I've actually got guys on the floor, uh, to go against. So it's going to be pretty amazing. So you don't have working legs, but in South Africa, you've just been competing against the able-bodied people. Cause there's just not enough adaptive.

So you just jump in with the able-bodied dudes. Yeah's just not enough adaptive. So you just jump in with the able-bodied dudes? Yeah. So I just jumped in and we just jumped in and scaled the workouts. But we obviously don't compete against them. I just do it for fun and for awareness. I've done one comp like that where we did it. One of the guys was actually just like, let's do it. Because I was going to just do a workout by myself just to show and just create some awareness and um and then he was like why don't you just jump in some of the workouts

so we so we did it with some of the guys pretty cool did you have the bug before then or did that give you the bug were you like oh i like that i i had i had the bug um i think when i used to play rugby semi-professionally and i was a kickboxer, I used to do for South African kickboxing. And so I had this competitive edge, you know, and when I got shot, I played a bit of basketball, but when I stopped that, I lost that whole thing of being able to be competitive. And so about three years ago when the Open first invited the Adaptives, I entered, just thought, okay, well, I don't do CrossFit, but I'm active and let me try. And we got involved and we did some stuff and it was just like that's when it

bit. When I saw that I was able to compete against, I would be in like the top 25 or something. And that made me think, okay, wait a minute, maybe I can do this. You know, there's some guys that are obviously injury-wise more able than I am, but I just want to get involved. So the competitiveness just got me. And that first three weeks of the Open, i think my wife almost wanted to leave me because all i cared about was crossfit you know they say the same thing once you do crossfit that's all you talk about it kind of was that way for those first three weeks so you know it's it's a big talk

um uh crossfit the cure for the world's most vaccine problem live longer all those things yeah but but we all know that that it's also a place where professional athletes or division one athletes go to die men and women who have a shit ton of fitness who were really good at their sports still want to be competitive after their window closes as you know a soccer player football player whatever their sport was and then they want to parlay they want to scratch that competition itch but then also i think i heard patrick velner talking about it the other day it's not relative to kickboxing it's a really low skill level yeah and so and so and so you can take your fitness and you can go in there and you can get good relative if you're already somewhat fit you can get good relatively quick because there isn't this there are there aren't all the technical aspects right hey exactly yeah in all

fairness yeah i think um once you because uh crossfit wasn't a big thing when i was shot because that was 16 years ago and um i think obviously uh maybe uh overseas it was but um in south africa not at all. So, we never had any CrossFit boxes and anything like that. And then this started coming about and I was like, what's this all called CrossFit thing about? But until you actually get involved in it somehow, and you see what goes into it, then you realize that these guys actually really need to be fit, obviously. But if you have a skill for gymnastics or weightlifting, then work it all together. I think nobody's good at all of them yet. But I'm saying not the best at all of them,

but you can be good at better at some. I think the challenge for me is just that because of the disability and because of some of the limitations, the movements become quite difficult because I don't have a core. So my level is from here down. I've got nothing. So I'm a higher level injury. And that makes certain movements more difficult. I saw you doing this movement. Maybe Caleb will find it on your Instagram.

I saw you doing this movement where a man's holding you from behind and you're holding a stick and i can't you're hitting something away and that was what that you maybe even maybe even like you're straddling like a pommel horse or something yes that was that was uh it was at my so i'd i'd go to a bike and he just then he does some exercises with me that are different and i'm sitting i I think on a, on my, on my knees, on a, on a punching bag just to sit over it. Okay. Yep. Yeah. Then I'm holding a stick for balance wise and trying to push the ball away while he's, so he'd come up with all these contraptions, these exercises, but they work. It's just stabilization really.

So they're trying to get me to stay stable and not completely lose my balance. Oh, here it is. Here it is. Damn, I can't believe I beat Caleb. I never beat Caleb. Look at this. I should... Bam. There you go. This thing right here.

So this basically shows how high... So right here. So you're saying below your nipples, you basically have lost control. Yes. So I would be considered a T2, T2 to T-spine. That's where the injury is. So it's pretty high, but I think I'm just lucky to still have full use of my arms and

hands. So it's not a C, it's not a neck injury, which makes a big difference. So if he lets go of you there, you fall? Yeah, I'll fall over backwards. So I'm using him to push away from, but if he fall? Yeah, I'll fall over backwards. So I'm using him to push away from him. But if he lets me go, I'll fall over backwards or sideways. I don't have to catch myself with my hands. So, yeah, the balance is the biggest thing, just trying to stay.

So the minute you have, I mean, if you watch the guys, some of the guys, the top guys that I'd be going against, they have injuries from the waist down and lower. And so the minute you have that core and that ability to stabilize your abs and your hips, it makes quite a big difference. So I think it's just that you lose a lot of balance is the main thing. So when I'm sitting in a chair, when I'm sitting in a chair that's more like a bucket and i'm deeper in i have a lot more stability hey you have you're you're basically you're you're a

guy with two arms yeah and like thank god you have a fucking neck your neck's okay exactly why why why not just do um why compete at crossFit and take the risk of hurting a shoulder? I guess that would be it, the shoulder, right? Good question. Because those are the last two you have. Can't you stay in just great fucking shape but just still not compete? So you can. I mean, I was doing that for a few years.

I was just in the gym, and I was just training and just kind of staying in good shape. But I guess that competitive, you know, that part just to see, can you go somewhere? And when you do it, I guess you start. Also for me, I think one of my biggest things from the beginning has just been to try and show people who, you know, who and and um and kind of given up hope that um that they can still do stuff like this you know like and be you know set the limitations over the expectations but higher and if they want to achieve things i think for me just wanting to achieve more in my situation but also just being able to show people that, you know, life's not over and you can still do stuff that,

well, you know, for me, it's thrilling to be able to do it and you get that adrenaline going. I think I've always just been one of those people that need something to, it kind of makes me feel more alive. How old are your kids? They're nine and 11. Do they play a part in that and the reason why you do it? Yeah, I think so. I mean, you know, every morning when I get up, you know, I get up and they – some days I don't feel like facing the day and doing what I do. But then I look at them and it's like, you know, if they see dad give up,

then they might pick up the same mentality as they go. So when they see me just get up and go, I don't think they've ever seen me give up just because I won't let them, but I also won't. So I think it plays a huge part for them. I can see it in my daughter. She's the older one. And she just has a mindset for an 11-year-old. She has a mindset that I've never seen in any other child. The way she just pursues and perseveres.

And she does dancing and she does all these things that she just wants to be better at and better at. She's up at seven in the morning to go to her dance recycles and we don't have to wake her up. And my son, as he gets older he's getting there as well so i think they just see that like for them they also know that they can do anything they want to you know so that's my one of the most important things for me is to for them to just see that uh you know dad doesn't give up and you know he may have the situation that he has, so no reason for us to.

And I think they're the main reason I do it, I think just because of being able to show them that they can still... I still do everything I can with them. I'll go outside and I'll play sports to whatever level I can. And they love it and they don't see me as lesser than anyone else than any other dad, which is really cool. If there's some things I can't do, obviously I can't go kick a soccer ball with my son and he loves playing soccer, but I'll go and I'll play with him either way, you know, and those are the things that are important to me,

just to be there for them in that. So I think it's my daughter's now, all she wants to do is start crossfit kids so it's um no so she has the bug too huh yeah she just i think she just wants to do so much like she really has this tenacity to do um you know she plays soccer which in in south South Africa for girls is not that common. And she just loves it. So I said, well, this is probably the place to be for that. She's 11? Yeah, she's 11.

Yeah, congratulations. So your kids have only known you, they never knew you before you had been shot? They didn't know, which I think helps. It helps quite a bit because, you know, they didn't have dad running around kicking a soccer ball before and now all of a sudden he can't. You know, so I think that helps a lot. Oh, dude, they would be devastated if they...

Yeah. They would be devastated. Like, to them, it's probably nothing. But if they had already been born, they would have been devastated, right? They would have seen their dad go through a loss, but instead they... Exactly, but instead they don't. It's just the baseline to them.

I think so. I think they just, you know, that's what they know. So for them, I'm so grateful that they didn't have to go through the trauma and everything that went with it, you know. That's the best part about it. I guess they just arrived. I was like and you know it's no different to them um darren um you're in the security business yeah is that a good business in south africa i would think it is it is it's a it's a it's a tough one but it's also it's a good good one, especially if you're doing armed response and guarding. Then the guards do really, really well because, obviously, the guarding business is pretty – the people who hire guards, it gets quite expensive.

But we do systems, so we're not guarding, but we do systems. So we do a lot of the theft prevention and access control remote site access and those type of things so it is a good what does that mean like gates and gates and cameras and yeah so we'll so we'll have uh for example cell like cameras alarm systems all that and then we've got a system that if somebody breaks in it'll fill the place with smoke within 30 seconds it's completely harmless but you can't see or breathe you can't see or you're or you can't you know you can breathe perfectly and your eyes don't breathe but you just can't see a thing so the guys just want to get up because it's it's worse than a

it's worse than a you know that club smoke it's that thick it's very thick so you can't see through it at all oh that's been yeah that that they use a lot in jewelry stores because we have a lot of armed robberies where the guys come in in the day, and they'll rob the jewelry stores or retail stores, and then the guys will actually activate the machine. Smoke will deploy, and people will run away. Let me ask you this. This is off topic a bit. We've had something – we had this incident happen in the United States with a police officer was accused that he clearly 100% did not do, killed a guy named George Floyd. And the autopsy report, everything came back that the guy OD'd on fentanyl. It's like – but there's a – we had a lot of corruption in that case, and we're going to have the producer of the movie coming on in a few days. that case and we're gonna have the producer of the movie coming on in a few days and ever since then there's been been this development of uh something that's called a victim class in the united states

where they're allowed to steal now we have this you're you're just a lot you're allowed to steal and is that what happened in south africa also is there is there a class like we used to not have this problem the police because the police aren't engaging criminals anymore so we used to have it so the police would engage the criminals grab them or if they were robbing the store me and you were there we would beat them now we're not allowed to do that there's in the last two years this whole thing has changed or if you if you hold someone up at gunpoint at an atm you'll be out in 24 hours now we just had this sudden shift in in what happened um there's there's this acceptance for violence and these people are called them there's not there's not white privilege in this country there's something called the victim class

they have all the privilege yeah yeah is that what happened in south africa just all of a sudden crime became acceptable i think it would have been years ago but you know our justice system doesn't doesn't operate like yours does or used to you know we've got we've got guys you know the guys who who robbed and came along she shot me at my my parents home i mean there were seven of them um seven guys seven guys came in yeah and there were yeah i think i think um all together when you watched back on camera and you saw them arriving and leaving, it was a group of seven, I think probably about five of them actually came in the house. And I think I must have come up against two or three of them, but I don't remember much of the

incident that when it happened, but I do know the whole story and around it. And those guys, the whole story and around it. And those guys, they ended up taking, all they took off till the guy shot me was a laptop, a computer, a TV, my wallet,

and one or two. Were your parents home? They were, yeah. So they came at about 3 a.m. in the morning. My dad heard the alarm go off and he called me on the intercom and he said, he could see on the camera, he said, there's some guys at the gate. So I obviously wanted to... And you were in the house? I was in the house, yeah. So I wanted to protect my family, obviously.

I had a gun with me, but I don't, so I had a double-level bedroom. So when my dad found me, I was lying in the bedroom on my back. And so what happened, I think, is that when I was going downstairs, I obviously thought that they were outside and not in the house yet. And they must have opened the door, my bedroom door, into me. I got into a fight with them. I had scratches and bruises all over my arms. I mean, I was a big guy. I'd been fighting, you know, a strong guy.

The guy stabbed me in the head with a screwdriver, and then he shot me point blank. He shot me point blank in the chest. And the bullet missed my heart by a millimeter because my heart was beating and it contracted. when it went past and it opened up again. He shot you with your gun or with his gun? No, with his gun. Yeah, with his gun.

So my gun wasn't fired. So I don't know what. They took it, but it wasn't fired. So I think they must have surprised me. And yeah, it missed my heart by a millimeter, hit my lung, ruptured my lung, hit the spine, and the bone fragments went into the spinal cord. And that's what caused the damage. So when my dad found me, he thought I'd been shot in the head because of the screwdriver.

But luckily, that was just superficial, so it didn't go through. And then he had to rush me to the hospital because I was just losing too much blood. So they rushed me to the hospital. How close did you come to dying? Well, he had to get me out and get me to the hospital because if I'd waited for the ambulance, I would have lost too much blood. Did he see the bad guys?

Did he see them when he came and got you? Were they still in the house? No, no, they had left. So he was upstairs with my mom um obviously you know stay there with her and and i i i intercepted so um and so the the when they left it's a miracle he got you in the car dude it's a miracle he was able to move you yeah eventually there was a guy that came from the armed response company you know like that and and they helped him they helped him get me into the car and then they took me to that but the fact that it missed my heart like that um you know

i always just said that is a miracle that i'm here um and uh and yeah i got a second chance uh trying to make it trying to make it count but they never caught the guys well that's the thing they got fingerprints they found the car that they crashed down the road. They tracked it back to a house that they were staying in, but the excuse was that it's being sublet and it's not their house and they never found it. So that's kind of what you expect, unfortunately, because normally the guys, that's why they do it.

They do it because they very seldom get caught. And if they do, it's another thing. They get out, you know, they get out a week later. There's always, you know, I don't know many stories where people have been caught and stayed in jail for the time that they deserve. Half the time they get let off on something. So it's pretty bad when it comes to that. So there is an acceptance of crime there a level of acceptance i mean yeah i mean crime is just it's it's you know if you don't if you live in in johannesburg um you know it's uh

there's places that are safe and they're safe areas i live in cape town which is safer now but um but if you live there you you the chances are that if you you know someone has been hijacked you know them personally you know someone has been held at gunpoint in their car on the side of the road so it's not rare it's not rare everyone knows it's not rare no it's not rare i think everybody knows somebody it's a it's a and i mean no my story if i tell people that i was shot in a house robbery, it's like, it is like, wow, oh my gosh, and everything. But it's not, it's not a rare thing that, you know, that you've been, so a lot of people

get held up. Obviously, we know a few people have been shot, but not kind of to this, you know, so yeah, it's not a rare thing, unfortunately. Cape Town is a lot safer. It is a lot safer to to be there and and um the violence is not as um you don't have that violent crime you're more of a crime where the guys will come into your house when you're not there um but in joeburg they want to come to your house when you are there because they want your safe keys they want your cars they want everything so when i was there it was a beautiful johannesburg was a beautiful city um but there were there was no one out on the streets and there were coffee shops and there were all these things i go how

come there's not people sitting outside they're like you can't do that here and i go what do you mean they're like if you're sitting outside on with your laptop at a table someone will just come by and take it i was like no shit yes i think if you go in general if you have like sitting in a restaurant a coffee shop it's cool you can but depending what area you're in but it is you know it's not something you just you don't leave your cell phone at the table and walk away from it or something like it because it'll be gone in seconds you know you someone walking past will grab it or something so it is it's a lot more you've got to be a lot more we're like i'm now we we landed here and and last night i i had to just go to the to the store just around the corner and i don't

like i'm feeling is it okay for me to just roll by myself here in the street you know on the sidewalk i don't know if it's safe or not you know um because i wouldn't do it back home yeah i i think orland i i when I think of Orlando, I mean, unless you're in just a really horrible spot, I think Orlando is fine. Yeah, I mean, I saw a lot of people walking around, so it kind of made me feel okay. Yeah, but we do have cities in our country

that are headed down that path. It is so wild to see it, because we didn't even have this a few years ago. South Africa is a warning to America of what things will be if we don't correct. And basically what happened is they are our civilization has declared war on our police officers. It sucks. Yeah. Yeah.

That sucks. Because I've seen what I mean, you know, you watch and you see on social media and the news and kind of see what's going on. And like, you know, you watch the cops in the U.S. have always been like they don't take you know they don't take anything but but you like our cops our cops and and there's a there's a select few that that would that are different and there are some good ones yeah but we have good cops they're just scared they're not getting the support from from the society they're just scared well well in general i think if you had to have a set of cops and and there's an armed robbery in place and i think that almost kind of take a bit longer to get there on purpose you know because they don't want to be they don't be caught in fire with these guys yeah i don't blame hey if you would have shot those guys in

your house would would you have gotten in trouble so it would have been a tough one yeah because if you um if you have i've known guys who have actually had to, you know, and self-defense shot, and then, uh, then it's a big thing, or you've shot the guy, but he hasn't actually done anything to you or that type of thing. But yeah, there's ways that I think that it's a, it becomes a difficult one. So you can, you can get in trouble. Look, if it's self-defense and you've got that many guys and it's almost like you'd have to stage stage it being worse than than it was you know depending how bad it was but yeah it can get tricky we we had a guy here in the united states it was a big case uh it's it's kind of crazy he was on the ground he had been knocked down he was a white guy and another white guy with a skateboard was coming at him like

trying to beat him and yelling racial epithets and this guy had just been released from prison the day before for sodomizing like a dozen seven-year-old boys i'm not even making this shit up and he told the guy not to fuck with them and get away from him and he finally shot this guy i heard this story yes yeah yeah and this they tried to fucking shot this guy i heard this story yes yeah and this they tried to fucking try this guy i saw that yeah that's crazy oh and and it was just white on white crime which is and they were trying to charge him like a racist it was fucking yeah our country's this country's lost its mind but hey you're in a good state i think right when the pandemic happened their governor john uh what's his name des DeSantis? What's his first name?

Ron. Ron, John. Ron, he passed a law basically saying if someone enters your house, you can put it to them. Yeah, that's cool. Yeah, so – That's cool. It's cool having that. I guess you know that yeah yeah so so that happens in um is that so when you come to in the hot do you remember coming to consciousness in the hospital in the hospital i think i woke

up about a day later um and i woke up and i had just obviously drips and you know all wires and everything everywhere so i just try to pull everything out and um and my um my mom and dad and my girlfriend um were standing there and i was trying to just get rid of stuff and they were trying to stop me but i obviously didn't know what had happened and then they had to try and they had to i think they increased the put me back to sleep so when i woke up again i was tied to the bed and that was even worse because i was like no way now i'm restricted you know i just wanted to tell you everything about that and explain to me now you need these things to breathe and this is all you know so um so you've got a punctured lung

a hole in your head and a wound very close to you yeah yeah yeah yeah so so um you see all the trains obviously to help with the lung and the breathing and that. So, those are the things I was trying to pull out. And obviously, I had oxygen and that type of stuff. So, yeah, when I woke up, that was the first thing I remember. And then, yeah, then I think after that, it was just, you know, the doctor, they kind of say to you, this is what's happened. Obviously you can feel it, you can't feel certain things, but then the doctor's like, you know, this is what's happened. And then they say, well, you still have swelling. It could still go down. And so we don't know yet, but that's what they tell you initially.

But to me, I mean, that was my absolute worst nightmare, for something like that to happen. It's just like, I never ever thought that that would be... Actually, I met a guy who was in an off-road motocross accident, and I used to see him in the gym all the time. He used to cycle past my house. And when I saw him, he was in a chair, he'd broken his neck, and he was in the physio and i saw this guy and for the first time when i saw him and he had like this big smile on his face and i looked and i was like i spoke to him and when i left there i was like that is probably my worst nightmare i said that happened to me rather killing you know and that's oh wow you remember having that thought seeing him lose his legs and you're like fuck that i ain't doing that i do yeah yeah and uh and so when it happened it was like worst nightmare

come true you know um and then and then you just like because it's what what happens and you're a rugby player and kickboxer those things and what happens now you know so um So, I had from the beginning, I always had the faith that things were gonna come right and I'd get out of the hospital before, you know, when I'd come out and you come out fighting and you're walking and that, you know, like the typical movie where the guy goes to the rehab and he gets up and he's strong afterwards.

You know, I had that for three months when I was in the rehab, I had that, you that, at least I think I had that to drive me. I said, tomorrow is going to be better and it's going to be better. And yes, there were tough days and I struggled a lot. But those were the things that kept me through just believing that tomorrow would be better and that I'd get up. You know, if I look back, it was definitely what got me through that time because I don't think I would have, I don't think I would have made it otherwise. And I mean, Mike. You were, you were three months in the hospital? In the rehab, yeah.

So that's where you go and they kind of teach you how to sit up again and how to transfer to a bed or into the shower. But you weren't in the hospital. You would come, you would go home and then come back every day. kind of teach you how to sit up again and how to transfer to a bed or into the shower but you weren't in the hospital you would come you would go home and then come back every no i would stay there no i slept oh you stayed there wow yeah wow that's a long time geez yeah so yeah so the the beginning you know when i was in in the hospital before i went to the rehab i think it was an icu for about a week and then the general ward for about a week and a half or two weeks but in that time I mean my biggest challenge was trying to sit up in a lazy boy and not for not pass out you know after five minutes and so um so you know they get you doing those things and then put you in a standing frame and you just fall asleep immediately because your blood pressure and all that and your

body's not used to being upright again you know know? So the rehab itself is to just adapt you to general living again. And the normal time, you know, is kind of a general time is three months, depending on how severe your injury is. But I was there for three months and then eventually out. So that was home for a while. I was there for three months and then eventually out. So that was home for a while. After your incident, after being shot and taken to the hospital,

how long is it down before it's up? Not psychologically speaking, strictly physically speaking. Like how fast are you? Like is there one month where you're just sitting there watching your whole body just erode and go into atrophy? Yeah, I think you lose that that atrophy happens so quickly you know like you lose a lot of your legs you know i'd really be big legs and you'd lose that weight quickly you know because you're not moving at all and it's like a it's it's a bit of mind-blowing how quickly it goes but you know you start your movie and because i because i had

this thing if i want to start moving and training and that i try to do whatever i can but but you are down for a while because you don't have the strength i guess you know for me because of the lung and and and you know where the bullet went through the my body everywhere else was okay the breathing actually go through you he shot it in your chest and straight out your back yeah? Yeah, straight through. Yeah. Damn, that's wild, dude. Is that all healed? Is there anything that's permanently changed in there? So I've always got a level of pain where the bullet went out in that area. I think the spinal cord was severed halfway. the bone fragments actually got stuck in. And the doctor, when I went in, they said, look, they can take them out, but the chances if they take them out are, you've got 50-50% chance of either the injury gets worse

the injury gets worse or, um, or you, or there's no change, you know, or you may have a, so, so there was no, there was no great benefit to taking the bone fragments out. There was a chance that they could sever the whole spinal cord and then, then your chances are. So I just opted for them to leave them in, you know? Um, and that was, and that was what, so, so there's always, there's always a bit of, there's always pain there. I've always got a level of pain there. And then obviously we do. Is it kind of like if you take the nail out of your tire, you're was, and that was what, so, so there's always, there's always a bit of, there's always pain there. I've always got a level of pain there. And then obviously we do.

Is it kind of like if you take the nail out of your tire, you're like, Oh, if it's a big nail, the tires go flat, you might as well just leave it in. Pretty much where you're going. So basically you decided to live with the pain, then risk losing more control of your body. Yeah. And I think you'd probably have that level of pain anyways, because, you know, cause the nerves are damaged.

So that's the, that's a real pain we deal with is of pain anyways, because, you know, cause the nerves are damaged. So that's the, that's a real pain we deal with is nerve pain and neuro pain, you know, and that's pain that you have like best way to explain nerve pain is like, like fire running through your veins. You know, it's, it's, um, what's the x-ray look like? What's your spine look like? Is there just, if we saw an MRI or an x-ray of it, is it just shattered? Is there just, is there a vertebrae missing? No. So, uh, yeah, so that there were, there were pieces that came off of it. So it actually didn't, um, it didn't shatter the whole spine,

but the fragments came off and went in. So, so luckily everything else was still kind of in place, you know? Um, but the, but because of those fragments going to spinal cord, that's, that's the damage, you know? So a lot of guys have fusions and things like that because they break their backs and those type of things. And with a fusion, sometimes it gets better as well, but mine obviously wasn't.

I never had an operation on my spine. Has anything changed in terms of, has anything gotten better? Have you gotten more control over the years or no, just the way it was? Ability, no. Yeah, ability, no. The only thing that's changed is the things that I physically do that I can obviously do more in terms of my balance and things like that.

I mean, CrossFit has been amazing because, you know, we do workouts where we have to get on the floor and get back in the chair and do certain transfers and stuff. And it actually helps in everyday life because there's certain movements that you do that can help you pick up things. So it all links up. But in terms of improvement, there hasn't been like a foot moving or anything like that.

No, it's been pretty much the same have you have you met anyone who has your exact same incident in south africa someone who who was shot and in lost legs i have yeah i have there was a there was a guy he actually um he came to the to the rehab where i was when i'd left and i heard about him and uh and i was actually getting i was actually getting a new wheelchair, my original chair. Someone reached out to me and just said, look, this guy doesn't have a chair. He's pretty similar to you. He's had the same injury in terms of his shots as well. I think he was shot in a, could have been a possible hijacking. And they just said, look, he doesn't

have the funds and the medical aid, don't have the funds to give him a new chair. And so I had a chair, my first chair. And so I met him and I gave it to him and said, no, he could have it. At least it was a start for him. But I think I did that. It was, it meant more to me because the guy kind of the same it was the same injury same thing you know so so it was cool to see that he at least had a more of a customized chair to take to take along forward and but i think um i've met there's been a few other people that i've met or so that um that were hijacked and also another girl that was in the hospital. There's been a couple.

I wonder what the camaraderie is going to be like for you. You're at Waterpalooza, which is, I don't want to misspeak, but in my mind, it's the godfather of the adaptive events. They were doing big adaptive events before everyone. That's why I wanted to do that's why I wanted to do it. Cause they were the first ones, you know, that said, we're going to take all the adaptives and put them in one place. We're not just going to take three of them. And it's like, you give me something and I'll do it. I think they put a post recently to say, like, we said, give us an idea and we'll put it together, you know, which is awesome. And that was the one I wanted to do just because they were like let's include everybody now and that's and that's what's amazing i mean

crossfit in the crossfit games they're doing it now um but they've split obviously enough split venues so um the first two years that they had adaptive they never had wheelchairs they only had like amputees i think and euro and no wheelchairs and They only had amputees, I think, and neuro. And no wheelchairs. We were waiting for the wheelchairs to be included. And I think this next year when they will be included will be the first time that they actually separate them. So, they won't be in the same stage. And I think for me, the cool thing is that being there with all the elites and being amongst those guys makes it just feel so much better because you're with all the best athletes in the world. And whether you're adaptive or not, you're on the same stage.

And that makes it pretty cool for me. And this is going to be the first time you're going to make friends this weekend. This is going to be the first coming out party going to, you're going to make friends this weekend. Like this is going to be the first, you're going to, this is a coming out party for you. Really? Yeah, it is. It is going to be cool.

I think, I think all the guys that I've seen on Instagram, you know, the top, the top guys that are there the whole time. And, you know, I'll send a message or leave a comment and whatever,

but actually being there and being able to meet them is going to be pretty awesome. Hey, you ever think about moving out of South Africa? I do, yeah. I think being in the US, I don't know what it is when I came here when I was younger, it's always been somewhere where we'd like to be.

Also, just because I think one thing about accessibility and being in a wheelchair, this is a lot more accessible and a lot more aware of us than South Africa is. I mean, you, most places in South Africa, you go, like the malls you will, but like a restaurant, they won't have an accessible bathroom and things like that. They'll have stairs going in, like 12 stairs. And so then you've either got to not go there or you've got to make it work. At the rate people are getting type 2 diabetes in this country,

and you know that's the leading cause of amputation in the United States, but this is a great place for someone like you. Yeah, well, that's the thing. You can take advantage of other people's bad choices for what just happened to you incidentally. Yeah, because, yeah, I mean, you know, I know in the U.S. advantage of other people's bad choices for what just happened to you incidentally yeah because yeah i mean you know i know in the us if if someone is not accessible it's usually there's usually fines to pay or you can actually go after them but yeah and so in south africa you can

complain and they'll just be like sorry i don't have it even new places that make don't have don't have the accessibility which is crazy I didn't know this fact. 54% of all surgical amputations result from complications of vascular disease. Hey, it used to be when I was a kid, the prosthetic business was strictly motorcycle people. Sure. A few people bucked off a horse but mostly just motorcycle dudes now now eating twinkies and drinking uh coca-cola have surpassed as can you imagine drinking so much coke they had to cut your leg off that's crazy well um well my um a friend of mine just went to

uh disney now and obviously we want to take the kids there and he was like listen um he's like you can get one of those electric wheelchairs i'm like no it's not gonna happen i'm not gonna get one of those ones he's like where everyone's got them he's like there's just so many overweight people that are just using chairs yes overweight and i'm like oh man that's and there's whole areas you haven't gone yet right oh go ahead go ahead Taylor. I was just there last week, and there was a line to get wheelchairs from the venue or whatever that gives the wheelchairs out.

It was a line of 30 people, and they were all just severely obese. Just couldn't walk. Their legs were already swollen. They were just walking from the parking lot out to the fucking entry. It was a nightmare. Dude, there'll be whole sections darren you're gonna see where there are like literally like 500 baby strollers and then like

500 electric carts like you know what i mean just like stacked up in areas like it's it's nuts you're gonna see some why you're gonna see some wild shit i'd like to actually talk to you after you go it's quite it's quite a uh it's a trip when he told me exactly because i remember when i came in years ago i remember there was some overweight people that had actually used one or two and i thought she said something crazy and i was so young but now i'm like i mean yeah yeah you've got someone who needs a chair obviously and then you've got the people who just couldn't be bothered and everyone's lining up for chairs i mean they used to do a fast pass thing for people in wheelchairs but i think it's changed

you have to like apply that anymore yeah we had to apply for ours like they do like a veterans thing and you had to apply for it and you have to like make a phone call and like what's wrong with you that kind of thing yeah so i think i need to do that. Yeah. Otherwise I'm going to definitely do that. It's well worth it. Okay. I, my, I saw these two women who were in electric carts. They were too big for the electric carts. Even they were massive and they were riding side by side and they had their daughter.

It was, it was a lesbian couple and they had a daughter with their daughter with them. And the daughter had blue hair and the septum ring. And she was, she was skinny but she was riding between the two carts you know what i mean that was her trip to disneyland i was like but that kid's probably having a blast but fuck dude can you imagine your two

moms are so big that like even the cars can't come around it was nuts oh man that's crazy it was yeah we don't we don't that's one thing we don't have much in South Africa is not, you know, we've got obviously white people, but you won't see that kind of thing. You won't see the shopping centers with white people using wheelchairs, you know. Just packed. Yeah. I mean, maybe one every now and then, but, but if you see a chair, it's normally someone who needs one. Darren, so, so this happens to you

this incident happens to you how old were you when you got shot uh 26 and uh do you know how it affected your parents did your parents hide how it affected them um yeah i think i think that perhaps deal with it the best way they could. Like I said to you, I've always been a believer and man of faith. So for them, because there was also prayer and believing as well, and I think they dealt a lot with it like that. But I think there's also parts of it that affected them differently where they maybe didn't deal with it properly. When I say properly, how do you deal with it properly? But yeah.

I mean, you're their pride, your dad's and mom's prized possession, right? I mean, you're their Sistine Chapel, right? You're like their pride and joy. You're everything to them. Yeah. So I think when that happened, obviously for them, it was, right you're like their pride and joy you're everything to them yeah so so so um you know i think i think when that when that happened obviously for them it was you know i've got i've got a sister she's older than me um but yeah i can't imagine something like happening to one of my kids i don't know you know i think your your kids are everything so when something like that happens it's got to affect you uh in a big big way. When you had kids, first of all, why did you have kids? So you're going through all of this.

So you'd already gone through, you'd been five years after this incident, you decided to have your daughter. Yeah. So my girlfriend, she was with me at the time. We had been dating for like two years. A beautiful girl and she she had done her articles at law she was busy doing that she had gone through a board exam she was and when this happened um she was by my side kind of in the hospital and and called her boss and said listen

this has happened to my boyfriend i need some time off and he was like sorry you've got to be back at work tomorrow and she's like well i can't and then he told her well you know either you come or you you don't have a job and she said i quit you know i'll stay there and she she stuck around and she stuck around for the three months she would be there every single day for as long as she could and then she would then she would leave when she had to leave. And so the days where, you know, it could have got very lonely. For me, I think that's one thing where I was very lucky that it didn't get lonely because she was there. You know, and I think it was hard for her to deal with as well.

But she stuck through it. And three months and then she stuck a couple more years and then we eventually got engaged and married and then the kids came. So I think for her, what I did was I put my life on hold a bit. When I said put on hold for like three years, I didn't want to move forward in the position I was in because I thought that things could get better you know so I um I sat and I was like look I don't want to get married yet because I want to walk down the aisle and and I don't want to have kids in this situation and I don't want to you know so so I kind of held back and I didn't even change my car I had a manual uh car when it happened and so I didn't even change my car um So she drove me around for like three years. And in that time where we were kind of transitioning and I wasn't moving forward, so to say, I was doing stuff. We'd go out and I was playing basketball and we were still

doing things, but I wasn't advancing in life because I was kind of waiting for better. And I was waiting for this thing to come right because I really believed that it would. I was waiting for this thing to come right because I really believed that it would. And I think in that time, obviously, I went through a very difficult time where I kind of went to the bottom and I'd had enough and I wasn't willing to carry on. That happened reasonably early into the injury. I just kind of got to the point where it's crazy how your mind works and how it gets to you. When you have all these things saying to you, well, first of all, I don't want to go through this. I don't want to sit through this pain and I don't want to deal with this. And second

of all, look at the people around you. They're struggling. My girlfriend's struggling all the time, pick up the chair. My parents are struggling as they look after me. These people, they'll be okay without me. They'll be sad for a while, but if I'm gone, it'll be better time pick up the chair my parents are struggling as we look after me and people don't these people you know they'll be okay without me they'll be sad for a while but but if i'm gone it'll be better for them because they won't have to deal with us you know and those are the thoughts that were more powerful than the ones of i don't want to sit through the pain every day so i think hey that's that's logical thinking too that's like yeah that's like um i i don't want to say that you should have followed through with it, but it's not like that's even crazy thinking. Yes.

Like, yeah, like here you are, this crazy abled man, and then all of a sudden an asset to everyone around you. And then all of a sudden you're like, even the slightest burden you put on other people is not comfortable for you you're not like yeah like i don't even want to ask someone to pass me a a you know a t-shirt that's too high right right and make me a cup of coffee or something some people are like oh they love it if someone did something for them all the time but it was mine because the last thing i wanted you know right right and so so everyone when people say you know when you hear people you know take the lives and and that it's everyone's always it's so selfish it's so selfish and i understand it it is very selfish but i understand the part where there was not a selfish aspect to it and and mine was like it was more them than me you know and i thought now though how much how much how close did you get you think

i i was pretty much there right there i decided what to do and everything you get, you think? I was pretty much there right there. I decided what to do. So you had a plan. I had a plan, yeah. I had the plan, I had the day, I had everything. And I sat on that day. I sat and I was just kind of thinking about everything. There wasn't anyone there.

And I just had these thoughts kind of running through my head. And I still believe it's God speaking to me in some way, you know. And I just sat down, I just had these thoughts going like, what if, you know, these people actually here because they love you, you know, they're here because they want to help you and you're lucky that you have them and that you still have people to love and that you still have people that are so to care about you so much and all that sort of thing you actually got look at you you're able to do this

and you're able to do that and i started getting all these thoughts of just saying like there's so much you can do and like there's so many people around you like when i was in hospital like the amount of people that came to see me was i mean there were queues out the door you know and it was like so when you think back to that and i just thought or just clicked it was like what are you doing you know it's this sucks but there's there's so much more out there you know and and that's when it changed for me and i think it was um it was hard i didn't speak to anyone about it after either i didn't tell anyone i was going to do it until much later let me ask you this so you were if i'm hearing this correct you were going to take your life so that you wouldn't be a burden

on other people and then you didn't not do it because you were scared you didn't not do it for the same reason you didn't then you decided actually would hurt more people than help like hey so you never thought about yourself in the equation at all you know you weren't scared you weren't scared to do it i guess i was but it was i was just like you know i'd kind of lost my identity that i did like who was that going to be you know everyone yeah there were there were people like like, he's the rugby player, he's a fighter, he's doing this, doing that, but now he's the guy in the wheelchair. And I didn't want to deal with that. It was like, I don't want to be that guy. And so I guess I was scared, but

my thoughts were more about that. And I think just getting the realization that it's not over there's you know you're here and you're alive and you can speak and your mind is perfect and you know you still have the ability to to do a lot and i think those things came in and i think that's that must have been really the main reason why i just yeah and and i think for me now, like I said, I didn't tell anyone afterwards, only much later when I started speaking, sort of sharing my story a bit, that I should tell it. And it's not something that my wife even likes to hear. Yeah, of course not. But she just gave everything to be there for me so that she could just give me love and give me, you know, and I just, I just, you know, imagine you just say, oh, sorry, I'm ending it all.

And yeah, someone's given up, no matter how long it is, but they've given up everything for you because they love you so much. And, you know, and you didn't see it that way. In hindsight, when she looks back at how you were acting, do you think she knew that you were getting close to rock bottom? I think she saw the trauma side, but I was quite good at hiding because I went through a lot. I didn't want everything to be a problem either, so I tried to hide as much as I could.

I mean, still to this day, I wouldn't reveal every issue, you know, just kind of put them aside because I just don't want it to be everybody else's burden and everyone's got their own things to deal with and I can deal with them myself. But I don't think she knew the severity of it and the extremity of it. I think I hid that quite well. the severity of it and the extremity of it. I think I hid that quite well. Sleeky says he didn't do it because God spoke to him and showed him the truth instead of the lies he was believing.

Do you think that's true? Yeah, so that's pretty much what I would say. I think it was the, you know, I was believing and I was hoping for better and I was hoping for this huge change. But I think my, you know, I still think it's God that spoke to me and said, look, don't do it. You know, I can't say I heard an audible voice saying, please stop, you know. But I still believe that's what came to me and that's what stopped me. And so, you know, yeah yeah you've been given a second chance

use it for the better and use it to change lives and do the best you can rather than than that you know when that goes away is it just upward what what year is that after your accident after your shooting it was probably in the same i would say in the same year. Same year. Is it just upward from there? Not to say there weren't some speed bumps, but did you ever revisit that situation? I didn't revisit that. No, that was it. One and done. So that was it, yeah.

That was it, yeah. I think going, you kind of made the decision to just push and keep going. And I think that was it for me. I've done it just to say, you know, let's keep going and let's do that. And I think, yeah think obviously the ups and downs, you have them. You have them every day. You face adversity in some way or others, but it's how

you deal with it. And I think for me, it's been a long road. When I say, and I was talking about how, coming back to your question, just about how, you know, my wife stuck with me. And she went after those within the three years. Something happened and I was just like, you know, I can't carry on sitting back like this. I'll never forget it. We were in a movie. We were watching a movie called Valentine's Day on Valentine's Day. You know, one of those things.

And someone in there. You suckers. You'll do anything for this was this was before we were engaged and there was a couple in the in the movie house that then got engaged uh as this movie was happening and whatever you know that got and i looked at her and she started crying but it wasn't like happy tears of crying it was like crying because she was wondering when that would happen for us because i was waiting you know and she was like she never said that but we had the conversation afterwards it's like how long do we wait until life continues like that you know until she can look forward to to getting married and to having kids for whatever it is you

know and i think um i think that was difficult i i i got blindsided completely you know i wasn't expecting that and i think um i think something happened not long after that where i just had this this switch in the way i was thinking is that you can either wait and live halfway or at 50%, you know, doing whatever, or make life as best as you can in the situation that you're in and just go flat out and change things and go forward and do it the best you can while you wait for things to get better, you know, if they do, if they don't. And there was a change for me. I think I changed, I sold my car, I got another car and that was adapted. I phoned a friend, I was like, listen, I need to get a ring, arrange that and then I arranged the trip. So the day I got my car, I was able to drive. The next day I took off to the bush to a game lodge and we went and got engaged.

And that was a step to start moving forward and say, here we go, I'm driving, I'm getting engaged and I'm moving on with life and I'm going to live it at full potential, whether I'm in a chair or whether I'm walking or whatever. And I think that was a big change for me. And other people, I admire the people who do it within the first month of coming out. They're like, no, we've got to keep going and change it up. And that's great. I never had that transition so quickly.

So I admire the ones who do. But I think in that time, I learned a lot. Spent a lot of time with her as well. And so we really got close in that way. But this is it. And then so a year later, we got married. And then we decided to try and have kids a year after that. So your question was your when and why.

I mean, I've always wondered. Let me just throw this in there too, just for people. still win win and why i mean let me let me just throw this in there too just for people in uh when we say in the united states when we say uh we went to the bush and then we asked her to marry her it's not a game lodge by the way it's totally different okay okay something that wasn't like that yeah okay so just check okay all right all right maybe you went to the bush maybe you went to both bushes maybe you went to the bush at the game lodge But I'm just saying I just want to make sure the translation The bush is like the jungle for you guys

It's like out in the country We call that the country Lions, tigers and bears are Lions and all that Hey but before we Before we go to the kids and moving forward That's a really interesting thing So you putting your life on hold Like in a a holding pattern, you know who else that happens to?

That happens to people who go to jail. They go to jail and they come out and they think that like they're embarrassed or they think they're less than. I bet you it happens to dudes in the military too. You're kind of in this like you get out and you're like, what the fuck? Like, what the fuck? like like like what the fuck my like what do i know like yeah you know people experience when you graduate from high school you're just like what the fuck now yeah so we're kind of like in that you got stuck in like a holding pattern like hey what do i know like my whole life is about recovering from this accident it's not about living life it's about recovering from the shit right yes yeah yeah and at some point you'd be like hey i'm done recovering i'm gonna have to recover

while i live my life is that what it is i don't understand yeah like fuck like i think so yeah i think it's just um they have to happen simultaneously i can't just sit here and just make the rest of my life recovery yeah yeah yeah i think it's it's definitely it's definitely that you've got to just try and yeah you've got to try and get through you know it's it's it's uh you put on hold and you don't you don't know i think because where does what's your new identity who you're gonna be you know yeah yeah and and so you get married and then um and then before you got married did she tell you you wanted to have kids like were you up for that like a kid is a lot of work you were we always wanted we always

wanted yeah yeah we're both on the same page with her and then so um she she gets pregnant and um i'm assuming you're like the rest the rest of us you're tripping you're like holy shit we're bringing a kid into this world yeah yeah yeah and your parents were excited it's all get out excited everyone excited i think for me the main thing was just i didn't um i didn't know how would how we deal with it you know with with the kids you know how you would have uh how you would have kids and and um and uh how we deal with it being a wheelchair, you know, having that. Yeah. Yeah.

And that changes your life and that changes your life significantly, I'm guessing in terms of also, so you, you, you went through some pretty heavy mental shit. You lose your body. Yeah. And then when you have a kid, you go through another huge mental shift. It's talk about losing your identity. I mean, like i'm completely well i found my identity when i had kids which is weird i didn't realize that you have one okay until i had until i had kids you know what i mean yeah i wasn't i was never comfortable in my skin until i

had kids yeah so i think i think when i when i had a and and the most difficult part of that whole process was finding out things you can't do all over again. You know, so I've gone through the process of, I can't do this, I can't do that. But now I've got a kid and I can't pick her up out of a cot because I don't have the balance to do that. So my wife's going to do it and give her to me and I've got to hold her and that type of thing. You know, so those are the things it's like um you know you just um you ever think about what your parents now that you have kids have you ever just sat in a chair and been like holy shit you think about what your parents must have gone through that night that you

yeah yeah i do that that's that's when it holy shit's when it became reality because then you're like, I don't want anything to happen to my kids. So that is the worst possible thing ever. It's something to have something like that to happen, the devastation trauma, everything. So you realize that once you have your own. What about this part? Like when you have kids, like, did you like, like my problems kind of just went away how old are you

yeah i'm 42 yeah um i had i have i had my first kids when i was about 42 but like my problems just kind of went away i didn't care about my shit anymore yes yeah yeah yeah you just did you feel that like a relief like oh fuck like this is cool i got someone else to worry about i don't have to worry about my shit anymore. It is like that. And that's why I say when I wake up in the morning and I struggle with stuff, it's like they're waiting for me. And they're going to see what happens in the day.

And that's all that counts. Got to make it worth for them. And we live for them. That's how I feel. I live for them. we live for them that's how i feel you know i live for them yeah um you're do you have um do you think you find some uh profound joy when you see them move like when you're sitting on the sideline they're playing soccer you see your daughter dancing i love it yeah i think it's definitely something i haven't even thought of, but I haven't thought

of, but with, you know, from that type of question, but I do, I mean, I love that they do stuff and I want them to do as much as they can. And I think it's obviously, you know, I want my son to do all the things that I did, but I also want him to do what he wants to do, you know, but I just love the fact that they are as active as they are. You know, they're not the type of kids that sit on their iPads all day long. And that's what I love. You know, they, they want to be out playing and and kicking and my daughter just doesn't stop

dancing she's she had a she had a her daughter dance exams to do and she just she was just tap dancing and she just would wherever we go she just taps and taps and taps you know it's like there's something tapping the whole time but it's's, it's, she was just practicing. And so, yeah, I just love that they want to move and that they, that they love doing it. You know, dude, she's in full bliss. Yeah. That's incredible. Oh my God. Hey, she's big, huh? Yeah. She's big. She's tall. She's tall. She's tall. Skinny. Yeah. How tall, how tall were you? Yeah. She looks crazy tall for 11.

That's as tall as my kid's going to be when he's a grown man. No, she's not that, but she's taller than me sitting in my chair. And she, she likes the fact that she gets taller and taller. She's like, Hey, I'm taller than you. And my son's getting there as well. So yeah. How, how, how tall, how tall were you when you were standing? So six foot one. Okay. It's about 186, somewhere around there.

How long are you here in the States? We are here till Waterpalooza ends on the 14th, and then we leave on the 17th. And when you're here and you're doing disneyland are you training also i need to be uh but obviously not i'll be doing a lot of pushing around disney so that's some training but uh but i'll be i'll be trying to find some some i'll try and find a box that i can go to uh that might be close by and then we moved we go to Fort Lauderdale for about four days. So, so I'll do some training there as well. Are you stressed out that you're going to lose some of your fitness? Yeah, I am a bit.

Yeah. I am a bit, yeah. But I've seen my coach in that and I'll still do some training in terms of the fitness and the cardio side. I don't think I'm in trouble of losing any strength. But yeah, I'm a little bit nervous and stressed out but i think i'll be good and what eating you got to be super disciplined about the eating yeah i'll run meat or disneyland eating churros yeah that's the thing so i i luckily i i have a quite a well-balanced diet we do calories and that type of thing so i'm okay with that you know but i'm just going to make sure that I still eat the right food.

And the division you're in, what's the division called? So it's adaptive seated. And when I qualified, there was a seated, like a seated with limb and without, well, with hip and without hip. And I thought they were going to be separate and it seems that they're going to be together. So I'll be against the guys who, there's a guy who's an amputee, like halfway down his thighs.

He's a beast. And there's a couple of guys that I'll be up against. There's a guy that, he's one of the top guys, I think Tom Yazga, I think is how you say his name. guys that i'll be up against there's a guy that um he's one of the top guys i think uh tom yazga i think is how you say his name and he was uh he was a paralympic swimmer as well and he's also got um he can actually do some crazy stuff he can do a handstand walk so i think i'm i think i'm up against him as well so i'm not sure if they'll scale that for me because i think the way it looks at the moment is i'm probably the most injured guy there when i say most injured i'm to my highest injury so it becomes quite a challenge when you go against

guys able to lift a lot a lot heavier weights and stuff just because of core and ability and balance and that but i am there i'm just so happy to be there and it's just going to be it's going to be awesome i wonder if the guy who shot you has any idea what happened to you Probably not that even kid. I think that they come to kill and they leave you know, that's it You think that that's evil Those are that's gonna be yeah Yeah, I mean, I mean for you to just have no No regard for someone's life at all and whatever happens afterwards, I just don't care, you know?

Yeah, for a TV set. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. God damn. So you'll do this event, and then do you have other aspirations already? Are you looking forward already? Are you like, okay, maybe if this goes, maybe I'll, uh, I think I want to get this, I want to get this out the way and then see what happens for, for the games. I'll do the open, see where I end up in the open and see what happens for the games and where it is. We don't know where it is yet for the adaptive. Um, but it'll

be cool. I think, I think this is just a big one for me. It's it's, I had, uh, I had the, I thought she's imagine, imagine one day going to Waterpalooza. I don't think it'll ever happen, but now it's happening. And you got to come with your family, which is awesome. That's amazing. I did a fundraiser for my coach and myself, and then friends of ours from the US, they, they actually, they said they want to, they want to get my family here, which has been amazing. So having them here to be able to come and watch, it's just awesome. So you had a benefactor help you come? Yes, I had some guys help.

I did this backer buddy, which is people doing donations. There've been some amazing, amazing people give donations. There have been some amazing people who give donations. And then there have been some other guys that got behind me in quite a big way. It was amazing. And then obviously the people to help my family is a separate thing to this because you can't expect people to do that. So, the awesome thing there was we had some friends from the US who hooked us up with accommodation and everything. So they covered with that. something there was we had some friends from the US who looked us up for the accommodation

and everything. So they covered with that. And then for my coach and myself, I had some amazing people come through as you can see there. And then a company and a good friend of mine, Justin from Daytona Group, he got behind me in a very big way. And another guy named Ramsey. And they he got behind me in a very big way um and another guy named ramsey and they and they really just they put some some good money behind it to be able to actually you know make it possible um and then um yeah and then there have been other donations that have just been amazing and then the then nicole uh one for she she's the one who actually sent you my stuff oh she was like yeah yeah and i was like it's just cool that we i got in here because of her and she was so i totally forgot about that yeah someone just sent

me a dm's that you should have this guy on the um yes on the podcast yeah yeah and it was her yeah and she and she also she could probably earn a family as well i've never never met her. I think she met me through that comp that I did. She became aware of me from there. I think she was there watching. She just sent me a message and said, I just want to get behind you. It was amazing. There's people that I haven't met who have donated, which has been awesome. Then obviously, people who have got behind me that have made it possible, which has been awesome. And then obviously people have got behind me that have made it possible, which has been amazing as well. Jedediah Stelzen, they will adapt the workouts different for you without hip,

high para and low para. Okay. Okay. And he's one of the guys that I'm always watching as well. So how's it going? Great, dude. That's cool. Yeah, man.

I was hoping that I'd meet him there, but I don't think he's going to be there so um yeah did i you're not going and so he and so he um so yeah they they do they have the high and the low i was hoping that they do it at water palooza as well so but he says that that's that's amazing news um it'll make things a little bit better at least and how cool is it that your kids get to come to the States? What a great trip for your kid. Come here and hang out. Yeah, it really is. Yeah.

That's, that's why I'm just so grateful to the people who made it possible. That really is awesome. Paul Peters. Holy smokes. It's the dildo show. Oh no, Paul.

Sorry. Wrong channel. Your mom's hosting the dildo show. Two channels over. Sorry, buddy. I apologize. We'll have her, your mom on next week thank you though nice yeah this guy always comes from facebook and wants

to fucking harass the show i really yeah yeah and just to hate it's for nothing yeah cool dude well he loves me he wants me to use that dildo on him. Good, good. So you'll finish Waterpalooza. You'll go home. Is there an experience that you hope to have here? Is there an experience you're going for? Like, do you just want to get through it? Do you want to win it?

Is there an experience you're going for? No, I just want to take it all in. Just the fact that I'm here, the fact that of what I've been through and where I've come from and to actually just have the ability to be here and compete and just take it all in and see all the elites and just have my family there watching me. You know, my daughter, when I told her we may not come, she cried a lot and I was like, oh, you know don't worry we'll we'll take you overseas another time she's like i don't care about the holiday like so why are you crying she said i just i want to watch you compete because you worked so hard and i was like trying to so yeah so it was just um i mean the tears were streaming from her face and i was just

like i couldn't believe it but it just that makes, makes it so much more special that they can be here. Oh, wow. That's good stuff. Hey, any, anything that, that piece you went through where you were very close to to you're having the conversation about taking your life. Yes. At Air Miles, we help you collect more moments. So instead of scrolling through photos of friends on social media, you can spend more time dinnering with them. How's that spicy enchilada?

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each in accordance with the respective terms and conditions. Limited time offer ends October 31, 2024. Conditions apply. Visit rbc.com slash student offers. That can't be avoided, right? Like, that needed – if I'm mischaracterizing this, tell me. I'm going to say it like a statement, but tell me if I'm wrong. I mean it as a question. Did that need to happen? Was there like, should you have been medicated or should someone have interfered? Or did that need to happen?

Or did you need to go to that spot to get out of that spot? I think I did. I think I did to realize what was going to be possible. And I had to get there to realize, you know, just to have that realization that it's not going to happen because then it may have happened a few more times down the line, you know, if it hadn't happened then. So I think so. That's the weird thing about hardship and suicide and hitting rock bottom. I know there's different characterizations of it. You, and I'm,

and I'm assuming you were sober when you hit rock bottom. It's not like you were yeah you weren't on fucking drugs or yeah yeah and i didn't take it it's valuable it's a valuable journey it's a scary journey but but but it kind of has to happen yeah yeah it did it did yeah i i always wonder if my kids are gonna have have to make that journey. You know what I mean? Because part of them, like, like for you, it's, it's, it's, I'm guessing from, for me, those, that journey that I took to rock bottom two was, is a crowning achievement of mine. Like, I don't know who I'd be without that journey to the bottom and back. But, um, but you kind of are like, you want your kids to have it, but you don't want your kids to have it.

You know what I mean? It's slippery down there. It's a slippery spot that down there. You don't want to slip and fall off the edge. Yeah. And I mean, I wouldn't have the mindset I have today. I wouldn't have a lot that I had today if it wasn't for that. And I think just people are like, would you be the same person?

I don't know. I don't know who I would be without what I've been through, but having gone through what I've gone through. So you said to me today, now we can take you back 16 years and you can have everything back. I just can't guarantee you that you'll have the life you have now and your family and your kids, but would you do it? I said, not a chance. I'd never give that up, not for anything. So I think when people say, oh, you've inspired me to do this or that,

would I have done that then? Would I have done that without being in this situation? I don't know. But the fact that I can just change one person's life and to come up to me and tell me, you know, I've seen what you've done, what you've gone through, and I've been going through a really hard time and it's been a dark time for me, but watching you has pulled me through. Like, that's more valuable to me than anything. And that's why I post the things I post and that's why I do those things because I just, you know, I want to, um, I just want to, I want to at least make a change and if it's changing one person's life,

that's all worth it. Hey, are you, um, are you going to go to Disneyland today? Tomorrow. Oh, where will you be at midnight tonight? Do you know? I'm not sure. Probably. Yeah. I'm just realizing

that yeah uh tomorrow yeah it's new year's eve i just looked at the calendar i was like oh shit yeah we're just getting ready for that for disney i think well hey uh darren great to meet you thanks for your time especially on your vacation um thanks for sharing your story uh i'm glad i'm in touch with you i'm glad that we can stay in touch uh you're yeah it's a great story yeah do you do you mind people reaching out to you talking to you asking no no definitely they must yeah i'm 100 for that okay darren underscore thomas 46 awesome Awesome. Travis said to stop by the booth at Waterpalooza whenever you get there as well from Vindicate. He's got a shirt for you. Oh, great.

That's cool. That's cool. Awesome. Yeah, stop by the coffee booth too. Gabe has a cup of coffee for you. Papers for you and Vindicate for sure. Okay, cool. I'll be there.

Definitely. All right. Final word from Jedediah. I get it, bud. Thank you, man. Cool. He's an inspiration to me. I watch him often.

I'm often like, oh, damn, I can't do that because he's like, hey, man, I'm not. No, he's got abs. He can do that stuff. But I'm not trying to do it anyway. So yeah, I'll just watch him. Thanks, man. Thanks, guys. Appreciate it.

All right, Darren. Good meeting meeting you talk to you soon man you too Darren Thomas wow what a fucking story what the fuck is going on with Paul over here what happened to your man bun you look like an old Italian lady hey shoe fit Italian lady Shoe fits Why does this bald guy with glasses look like a caterpillar

Is making love to his face Oh this one's good Beaver that's your last name You look like you eat a lot of wood Damn I wish I had to come up with that. I heard that one when I was in like fifth grade. Good job. Justin Miner.

I do look like an old Italian lady. Where's Sleeky? What an amazing story. Awesome story. Seven, what's your degree in UCSB? Girls. And drugs. seven what's your degree in ucsb the girls and drugs i was thinking about this guy last night like 10 30 at night i'm in the gym and i was just

tripping on the fact that he went to bed one day and then fucking eminently capable of mashing human beings and then woke up the next day just a head and arms. Yeah, it's pretty wild. Oh my god. What is this?

You want to see what's on this post? Oh, yeah, please. It's a good picture of you. Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah. i saw this and then someone yeah hi do i have nipple rings it looks like you're it's only your right nipple jesus christ i only had enough money to pierce the one. Jesus.

Jesus. Man. Man. Oh, man. That made me want that post actually made me want to get a haircut. I was thinking about cutting my hair really short. Really? Yeah. Oh,

it's a pen in your hand. I thought it was a nipple ring too. Uh, what, what, um, so, uh,

tomorrow morning, I better go over. I don't even know what I'm talking about. Will you correct me if I'm just talking gibberish? Sure. Okay. Tomorrow morning at 7 a.m. Pacific Standard Time, episode one of the Behind the Scenes will launch. It will not be scheduled because it's not possible to schedule something

that's for members only. Mm-hmm. I don't even see it scheduled like you don't see it uploaded no well i don't know i didn't i think i'm looking i'm looking where like the regular people look like just like youtubers look youtube viewers i'm not looking to see if it's where would i oh i go to manage videos do you see it scheduled it's not scheduled but it's in like it's uploaded and ready to be posted okay oh oh there's two of them one okay so i think it I think it 7am what happens is

Will Branstetter turns that thing makes that thing public yep and then all the members can watch it there's really no way to schedule that like members only all channels

oh shit oh schedule oh you can schedule it no oh yeah will you can schedule it you can schedule it for members only from private to public oh shit from from members to public what's this mean i better ask will what the fuck i better not fuck with this save from to public choose which members can watch your video now CEO January 1st at 7am

I wonder what that does I'm gonna fuck with this I was gonna be pissed I'm gonna hit scare what does that mean from members your members get early access to your video before it goes public at your chosen time

that sounds like when your video goes from members to public oh oh oh we don't want that oh oh shit okay I shouldn't fuck with this he knows what he's doing right

he's 17 he knows what he's doing yesterday I said I had a terabyte of internet speed so if that shows you anything about what I know yeah I like it I believe you it was so fast dude I have

two terabytes of internet speed what do you expect there will be a lot of Mexicans there really a lot there will be but it's your people okay I don't know so so basically Okay I don't know

So basically what I would like to do CrossFit mommy Mommy Yeah No I didn't have the spot on my back checked out It's getting bigger It's like the size of a BB now. You know,

what's crazy is I think that there was an omen to, um, one of the kids, my kids rolls with his mom. He never misses a class. And she's like, Hey, he's going to miss a week.

I go, Oh, what's up? She's like, he's having a mole removed. And she, she pulled down his shirt from the top and there was this fucking big mole. I go, why is he getting that removed?

She says he picks at it. Oh. Fair enough. Okay, so I can't wait for someone. I just choked on my own saliva. Can't wait for someone to ditch the minivan with all the cash coming in. I lost the spelling bee doing that choking on saliva yeah they said i spelled it wrong when actually i was just choking on my own saliva oh that sucks yeah i if i had 5 000 members

that would be a hundred thousand dollars a month times 12 months would be 1.2 million dollars after taxes that would be to take home 300k i'd probably i if i if that happened i probably would trade in my minivan but i would just get another minivan because it's a 2016 and my wife said that the the it's a toyota sienna and we has 80 000 miles and she said that the seats in the back where the kids sit the stitching's coming apart i don't even want to go back there and look i definitely need your money okay yeah sorry cave dastro uh 5 000 members let's try 100 yeah i'm the first 100 are going to be important fair enough

the first one that's a i i agree i agree the first uh yeah oh jay hartle those things will last forever just get seat coverage for the back seats too just back seat back seat can you look that up for me? Are you busy? No, no. What do you need? Back seats. 2016 Sienna seat covers. In case Paul comes over.

I don't want him to see that I drive a shitty car. You want leather tech seat covers? Please. Please. Please. A cow must die. Yeah, more people have... We have more members than we have people hit the like button.

That's fucking weird. After the behind the scenes, people drop off. Oh. Like Mario? Mario, are you sticking around after the behind the scenes or what? That's not a seat cover eric weiss savvy last time you went in the back of the van you pooped fair enough you know what's crazy did you take the toilet out yet so yesterday i saw our toilet was sitting by our front door and i started making fun of our kids i'm like oh you guys are seven and nine and you don't have the toilet in the

van. You're such big boys. And I could tell Avi was tripping. He's like, it's not in the car anymore. It's like a security blanket to him. He loves running back to the van taking a piss. I really gotta go, dude. Plenty of seat covers on Amazon for the back seats.

Really? Got some on Cover cover craft these are cloth or whatever it's called those are covers for Sienna yeah I think so are they $349 are you fucking kidding me

no way 35% off. No way. Can you take those off and wash them? Yeah, probably. No. Wow. You should get a Ford Raptor to shuttle the kids. No, I love my minivan.

Okay, so that's what happens tomorrow. I love my minivan. Okay. So, okay. So that's what happens tomorrow. So tomorrow, um, and then afterwards,

I don't see it scheduled yet, but there'll be a showing. That's just like, um, like, I'll just talk about what we watched. I haven't even watched it yet. Episode.

I haven't watched any of them. I started trying to watch episode one. I watched like, I think episode like three or four randomly. Like, I don't, I think that's it it so i did watch like one and a half uh denise moore hi hey 35 000 on a minivan my 2016 2016 minivan was $50,000. Flat. Out the dough. $50,000.

I got the DVD player. What do you expect? Why don't you just get a portable one? They're like $100. The portable DVD? They just hang somewhere? Yeah. Hell yeah. That's a we roll. You know you made it when someone bootlegs it for free yes it looks like

the 35 people have seen well I gave the Illuminati the link the locker room my locker room crew the hitman I give the hitman the posse the gangsters the guys I roll with

I gave them all a free link but what's weird is Hitmen, The Posse, The Gangsters, The Guys I Roll With. I gave them all a free link. But what's weird is there's 35 views. That means some of these fuckers watched it twice or passed the link on. Not cool. That's cool. I'm fine with it. I sent one to, um, uh, Jason at CF media.

Who else did I send? Cause he made a video about me. Oh, look, Hiller watched it twice. I watched it twice too. Oh shit. Sorry.

You guys, I only gave you one free link. You guys are taking advantage of me. I watched it 10 times. I think Hiller's working on a video that I'm excited about. He called me and said, Hey, can you have Avi do this workout? Really? Yeah. So yes. So then Avi did the workout and he only did 29 reps my fault i counted wrong

wow yeah not cool horrible judge you need to take the or the judge's course where you do the open so two days later he did it again he broke his time by he by 40 seconds, so he's fine. Seve, can I get my 3% for the membership idea? Otherwise, I might get my lawyers involved. Yeah, it was your idea, right? Oh, I did send Don a link,

but I sent him a link just to show him the intro. I sent, obviously, Dave a link. I sent Nicole Carroll a link. Justin Zimbo. I did not send Justin a link, though I should send Justin a link. Oh, there was some guy who donated $49 in the show, and I sent him a link right away. Who was that?

Was that Sour or someone? Someone sent. Today? No, a while back. Someone sent $49. I was like, yeah, what episode do you want to see? I'll send it to you right now. Shot in the dark.

Which one? I don't even know I just sound yeah Oh what's this Walter I watched the behind the scenes Free on YouTube Yeah if you gave me a standee you'd get a link For sure Oh I sent my mom and my sister And my wife a link

Um Oh Mario oh Mario hey did I did I talk to Mario yesterday on the phone no that was Marco yeah yesterday was Marco Calderon all right that was the guy who called in All right.

That was the guy who called in? Right. He was woke like me and then he transitioned? Yeah. Someone sent me this thing. Oh, man. I don't know if you guys are ready for this. You want to see something that will just completely fucking change your world?

I should warn you before I read this. This is from the New York Times. December 28th, 2023. And there's an eye. This is eyewitness accounts of what happened October 7th. And this is what I was talking about yesterday when I said like, Hey, there's different operating systems, right?

There's like, you could watch CNN. That could be your operating system. You could be Christian. That could be your operating system. It could be Muslim. That could be operating system. You could be Mormonlim that could be operating system you could be mormon like the mormons got a cool one i heard they got a lot of incest going on but like they got like you know what i mean like salt lake city's cool

it's like clean and safe they got a little meth problem but like you know what i mean the road there's no potholes yeah it's not it's not iraq um it's not it's not you know these countries like where women get stoned like there's different operating system there you get the buddhist one just ways of thinking right right well dude when you hear what these fucking guys did it is the there is some of the grossest shit you've ever fucking heard in your life. I'm going to read this to you. And you're not even going to fucking believe it. Yura Karol, a 22-year-old security consultant, said he was hiding in the same spot. He can be seen in one of Sapir's photos,

meaning that you can see him hiding and looking up behind a bush as these guys attack these kids at this music festival. He and Sapir were part of a group of friends who had met up at the party. In an interview, Karol said he barely lifted his head to look on the road. He also described seeing a woman raped and killed. He barely lifted his head to look on the road. He also described seeing a woman raped and killed. That day I became an animal, another witness said.

I was emotionally detached, sharp, just the adrenaline of survival. I looked at all of this. I was photographing them with my eyes, not forgetting any detail. I told myself I should remember everything he said he then saw five men wearing civilian clothes all carrying knives one carrying a hammer dragging a woman across the ground she was very young naked and screaming they all gathered around her she's standing up they started raping her i saw the men standing in a half circle around her one penetrates her she screams i still remember her voice her screams without words then one of them raises a knife and they just slaughtered her

so they were they were having sex with these women and chopping them up with knives. What part of the Muslim operating system – like what part of the – were they trained? My question is were they trained to do this or is this part of being those people? Is that part of their culture or both? Both. their culture or both both he said they were hiding together in a stream bed he said he saw at least four men step out of the van attack the woman they ended up between their uh who ended up between their legs he said they were talking and giggling and shout shouting and that one of them stabbed her with a knife repeatedly, literally butchering her.

There's a crazy story in here. Okay, you ready for this? Her hands were tied behind her back. She was bent over, half naked. Her underwear rolled down to her knees. He said her vagina area appeared to have been sliced open as if someone tore her apart. God,

there's a fucking, there's a crazy, crazy story in here. The craziest one yet, you won't even believe it. You wouldn't believe the other ones? This one's fucking just on. The first victim she said she saw was a young woman with copper-colored hair. This is the New York Times. Blood running down her back,ants pushed down to her knees. One man pulled her by the hair.

Made her bend over. Another penetrated her. Sapir said. And every time she flinched. He plunged a knife into her back. This is two men raping a woman doggy style. While stabbing her in the fucking back. I've never even heard of this kind of She said then she watched another woman

Shredded to pieces while the terrorist Raped her she said another pulled A knife a box cutter and Sliced off her breast While they were raping her they cut off her breast One continues to rape her And the other throws her breast to someone else And they play with it

As the breast falls to the road you think they're gonna let these fucking people stay in Gaza hey there are women in this fucking country saying free Palestine in colleges and Country saying free Palestine in colleges. There are women in this country on college campuses and men, young people saying free Palestine.

You know what's crazy is as I was reading this someone pointed out to me one of my friends said hey you know they did that to the Armenians too yeah they did do that they did that to my people too they walked them out into the desert they fucking slit the women's stomachs open let the babies fall out they did all that shit and does that mean that it has to be done back to them no but they gotta leave gaza that you ain't staying and these people that are fucking protesting against israel and saying free palestine like you're out of your fucking mind man you need to think you need to think bigger you need to start thinking like hey what is the operating system that we want people using?

And in the short term, if the best thing we got is Christianity, let's grab it. This Muslim one ain't working. But, Stevan, Christians have done plenty of horrible shit. Fine, fine, but they got running water. They're not condoning the molestation of young boys. What are you talking about? Afghanistan is what I'm talking about. Stoning the molestation of young boys.

What are you talking about? Afghanistan is what I'm talking about. They're not talking about. Christians aren't openly trying to normalize. Molestation. Stoning of women. Different classes. But they do it.

I understand. I understand. I understand. I'm just trying to choose the path of civilization. Where we can get the most benefit. I'm not like looking for the perfect one I'm looking for one that doesn't chop the breast off of women And play catch with them Someone you know there's a video of a naked girl Folded backward in half in the back of a truck

While men celebrate all around her Women being walked paraded around with their whole ass bloody. Jay Hartle. Sebi, you need to end the show and start another one before starting this, before you start this, so it doesn't fuck up that interview for views. Oh, what? I don't know. I'm going to have a little, little i'm actually gonna clip this segment put it in the middle of every behind the scenes it's a good spot for it dude i'm reading this you gotta read this book by jennifer say that i'm reading the levi strauss lady what's it called

unbuttoned man. If you're a mom or a dad and you want to know what a real parent is like, Levi's unbuttoned, uh, Jennifer say, I, I'm, she comes on in two days.

I have four hours of listening to do with the book. She is caught up a lot on the women's thing. Like she really feels like she was held down because she was a woman. And that part, like, like I'm processing that part, but woman. And that part, like, I'm processing that part. But, man, she is like, you'd be so proud of her if you were friends with her or related to her. The way she stood up so that kids wouldn't be masked, she's a beast.

I cannot fucking believe people mask their fucking kids. What the fuck is wrong with you? I don't know. 20 of you were like, fuck you, asshole. I'm sorry. I'm not trying to alienate you. I just don't. I just, it's just like, now you know. I guess just now you know. Now we know.

Just don't mask your kids. Now you know. Don't ever mask your kids. Shiz, I'm on chapter nine of the book. Hey, what do you think? Do you like it? I'm loving it. Absolutely loving it. Yeah, she's not at Levi's anymore.

Anti-Second Amendment Company. I believe it. She says it's the fucking most woke place ever and she was like one of the king wokes and she transitioned oh my god I can't believe some people injected their kids before it was even approved for kids I know

holy shit test my kids test it on my kids. Oh, but Sleeky says, I still see kids masked in SoCal at the park. Oh, but Sleeky, you don't understand. Like maybe their grandparents have cancer or something. You don't understand. Yeah, these societies that are doing any. I did that whole Gaza thing. I'm Netanyahu all the way.

Like, keep the stories coming. Remind us. Remind us of what that operating system will cause. We know what the CNN operating system will cause we know what the cnn operating system will cause causes people to give their kids drugs that are approved by pfizer and to put masks on their kids okay we get that we we know the cnn one so you don't want that one condoning it there's a difference between what happens and condoning it that operating system has infiltrated our kids and colleges.

When I hear that free Palestine shit, all I hear is that they approve of what happened to those women. I hear support for that. Ah, it needed to be done to get attention. Fuck that. All right. Anyway, sorry, Darren, if I fucked up your interview. If you came here for the Darren interview, maybe you got a little more.

You got a little something else. It's a crazy show. What can I say? Learn something, probably. Oh, it's a good listen. Yeah. It's great, right? Don't you feel smarter for listening to it, hearing her story?

And she's a former USA national champion gymnast. Kelsey received $20 million for the Pfizer ad. Oh, wow. What a scumbag. Damn.

Is that really true? That means $10 million after taxes. Kelsey, Pfizer deal too. It does say that somewhere? Yeah. 20 mil. Damn. He's not going to need it if he marries Taylor Swift.

She got a lot of money? She's richer than he is. She just re-recorded all of her songs and released them under her own record label or whatever. How big is she? Is she a really big superstar? Massive. Is she the biggest?

Is she a Michael Jackson or Beatles-like thing for this generation? Pretty close, yeah. Crazy. Oh my god, she has 280 million followers on Instagram. Yeah, her net worth is 1.1 billion with a B. I couldn't even name one fucking song she sings. Would I know her music if I heard it? Maybe. Maybe the early stuff.

Newer stuff, not so much. Okay, so this is how fucking crazy I am I don't even is she in this picture right here I can't wait for this is she in this picture yes take a guess

this one dead center by Lisa Bonet? No. Where's your mouse? I can't see your mouse. Can you see my mouse now? Oh, that's weird that you can't see my mouse. Click on the window and I can... there. Okay. Oh, this one? Nope. This one?

Yes. This chick, the whole picture is centered around this chick, I feel like. Yeah, pretty much. But it's the chick next to the left of her that's Taylor Swift. She's the one on the right in that picture. Yeah, now I get her. Now I recognize her. Is that what she looks like?

Yeah. You know what I mean? She's very normal looking. Oh, this is beyonce yes she reminds me of um um oh i've seen this picture this is her and kendrick lamar she reminds me of, um, who is the chick who is in the Iron Man movies? And she was friends with Steven Spielberg. Oh,

uh, Reese Witherspoon. No. Shit. What's her skin? Gwyneth Paltrow. Gwyneth Paltrow. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Very, very, uh, Gwyneth Paltrow.

God, I'm so out of loop. How do people see stars now? Where do they go? What, what, what'm so out of the loop how do people see stars now where do they go what what where do where how do people know her like before it used to be like there were three stations and there were like 20 radio stations like how do people know her oh uh it started on the radio now it's like all Spotify and stuff like that she's got like world tours and stuff like right now it's that her eras tours i think is what it's called and she's just going all over the world

she what else would have kind of kick-started her like fame i guess maybe not kick-started but something that helped was she was at some award show and kanye west or so i do remember that this is like 10 years ago right yeah it was a long time ago and then kanye west came up on stage and was like you didn't deserve this beyonce did or something like that and yeah she but she was like still kind of young, and she's like, what the fuck? This is kind of what I look like. You can't tell if this is a man or a woman she's hugging. You're just kind of like,

it's not a bad-looking man or a bad-looking woman. It's just, you know what I mean? It just exists. It is. It just exists. Carol, you and your music team mean more to me than I could sum up. Okay.

I don't even know who that is. No, I've never been to a Taylor Swift concert. CK, Kevin. But anyway, that's how I feel. Taylor would probably love me. If we were friends, I'd probably get a picture in here But she doesn't have her boyfriend in here No I don't even think he has her on his social either

Damn I don't even think he has her on his social either. Damn. I wonder if she could she give me a million of those followers. Yeah. Oh, I don't believe that. She's not talented. She doesn't sing or play live. She's fake. She must be talented.

She's got to be. I just. She's got to be sometimes. she's gotta i just she's gotta be sometimes she's gotta have something i don't like hate her but i mean i don't understand how people just shit on her all the time she's oh they people do shit on her yeah it's like she's not a bad musician or person i don't think i took my daughter to her concert when she was eight my daughter's now 22 holy she's been around forever really oh she's 34. she's not they're not really dating she's a paid actor by the nfl

oh yeah that's a conspiracy i need 5 000 members i decided i don't need 20,000 subscribers, 26,000 YouTube subscribers. I need 5,000 members. And then I'm going to build a... I'm going to move my pod... I'm going to build a barn, illegal barn in my backyard and put my podcast studio over there. Give this office to Avi for his bedroom. You're just going to let him have a separate

building for his bedroom? Well, no. I'll connect it to the house. That's how I'm going to spend your money. You guys. That's the plan. This is tax deductible. For some of you, this is therapy. For some of you, this is a business expense.

Someone sent me a cool video saying there's no such thing as Aztecs. This is my new favorite rapper. Actually, this guy's more of a poet than a rapper. Okay, here we go. Enjoy. Where's the fruit and vegetables or even water with lemon? Look what they're feeding our women right after birth was given. The same foods that you find in public schools and prison. Even the little syrups with the high fructose corn syrup in them.

Processed sausage patty that smell like somebody's granddaddy's old boots. Whoever says this is nutritional, please show proof. You see there is no truth and really no use. Feeding junk food to the women giving birth to yo youth. Their minds and their bodies really would be better off fasting, but capitalism always got everybody capping. Government just trying to sell drugs and low quality foods through the hospital with their corporate buddies piling more bs on top of you with nabisco's oreos and chips

ahoy now they trying to take the foreskin and vaccinate my boy no way and i know it's like more and more weight every single day but a little self-sufficiency is all it's gonna take i couldn't really plan for this had the baby kind of late but the least i could do was make us some homemade shakes peace i like the foreskin line i try to take my boy's foreskin I try to take my boy's foreskin. No, that guy's not better than Taylor Swift. Let's not get crazy. Chill. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cringe, but fire nonetheless. That's what I thought. Yeah, exactly. Isn't that cool? Good job, Cave. That's the tension in your humanity. You have two thoughts that you're struggling. It's cringe, but it's good. What am I going to

do with that? Am I going to lie to myself? No. I'm going to be honest and express it. I hate black licorice, but I love it. You're retarded. You're just straight up retarded. It's the first time I've ever used that correctly.

A banger detox and recovery. Banger, banger. I hardly know her. How is that, Ian Arsvold? I've been listening to Hooverman's latest podcast with Robert Lustig. I was thinking about having Lustig on. How is it? Man, he's smart. I think he's smart.

He's kind of like the Mr. Know-It-All about how fucked up sugar is, right? Every minute I stay on, we pick up another member if I stayed on for 60 more minutes we get 60 more members it's not organic that's why it's cringy Harry Mack would have crushed that is that I don't know I'm organic

that's cringy that word's cringy uh can you be uncircumcised and jewish i don't know that's a good good good question look at zach jones another member i'm telling you one a minute zach what's up dude everyone's getting excited for monday tomorrow we're less than 24 away. Tomorrow at this time we'll be talking about you'll be like, fuck, we paid 20 bucks for that? That sucks, Evie. My response to you is going to be like, listen.

They're only going to get better. Set your expectations. It's like on the 10 round workout, this show is like the seventh 10 round workout this show is like the 7th round tomorrow's show is like you know the first round it's not

there's not a lot of action in tomorrow's show you know what I mean just wake up see Dave in his hotel room you see his penis in it that's it wow no one censoring me no one censoring me no one censoring me

uh no just me I don't know I think Will Branstetter said he might come on I don't know if that's true he sent a text saying he could come on he would come on I didn't even invite him on

they all stuck dude we never said it was gonna be good you said we're gonna do it listen they all suck the behind the scenes is like a yearbook you know what I mean like you spend $37 for it you wait all year for it and then there's like three pages out of 200 that you give a fuck about and it's like

you and your friends like eating a cheeseburger or something in the in the cafeteria like look there i am and then for me the whole yearbook was ruined because the girl who was in charge of our fucking yearbook our senior year i was friends with her boyfriend and she hated me and i was pretty close with her boyfriend And she hated me So she wrote in the back of every single yearbook She had it printed She was president of the yearbook committee

Savon has a huge nose Wow Yeah it got printed in every yearbook No way You think that hurt me Yes Damn You think that hurt me? Yes. Damn, that's a different time.

Damn, look at Gina Bartoli. Yeah, every yearbook just written. Sebon has a huge nose in the back. Like, handwritten, but reprinted. Do you know what I mean? Like, it was like... Sc the scandal or whatever it was. Yeah. And then God just got fucking just put in every single one.

Not even small to not even small. You know what I mean? Like big like this. It wasn't like at the bottom corner of a page. And I just, and I just, I just fucking went. I just said, no,

I don't. Well, you do too oh shit that's fucked up and so the thing you think about it is like this dude Darren fucking gets shot. This chick gets fucking,

as it gets raped at a rave by fucking, uh, complete psychos. And now has a whole, has people in the United States who should be supporting her saying to free the people who fucking raped her. And then there's me to where all I had happened to me was someone wrote in a yearbook that I have a huge enough. Not so bad. No, it's cool. Not so bad at all. Got off easy. Yeah.

You got off real easy. One of my friends told me yesterday that my problem is that I don't forgive people and that I look at people's past. Like I'm like, oh, that dude posted a black square. That dude got the injection. I'm like, that's not true at all. I mean, I do look at them and I do judge them for that, but I still like them. I don't judge them like isn't like I don't like them. I'm just like, damn, what's that motherfucker got like some broken thinking patterns.

But I don't think I'm the type to hold grudges. For too long. They don't need to repent just what they can always hold the people, the rapist, they can repent. I don't know. I don't know. repent. Just what, Oh, they can always, Oh, the people, the rapist, they can repent. I don't know. I don't know. You can repent that. I mean,

no, it repent is, but they can't live in Gaza no more. I'll tell you that. Or anyone, you know, or your friends or anything, you ruined it for everyone.

It's over. Move. Oh, that see, that's the, that part's true. Move. Oh, that see, that's that part's true. Mason Mitchell. Mason Mitchell says Seve would have posted a black square of his five years earlier. Mason five five weeks earlier. I just was on the cusp. I was so close, dude. You don't even know. I know. I'm like so on a high horse that i don't even deserve you're right it's yeah exactly yeah you're so right yeah look at jacklyn robinson another member upgraded good call how can you tell i can see it on the other screen oh oh you have two screens going yeah i do now and Do you think that that's because...

Well, your internet looks good today. Oh, that's good. But I wonder if you have two streams going, if that fucks up your picture at all. Let me see if I... I'm going to see if I can open another screen. I just pause it. I just pull it up on YouTube and pause it,

and then just watch the chat. Oh, that's cool. I should do that too. I don't know if it's like a waste of a screen or not, but I can at least reference it. And that's where you can do polls from. Correct. Man, our YouTube game is strong.

Pretty good, yeah. That preview has 16,000 views. Really? Yeah. Pre-COVID, Seve would have marched in the rallies. No, no, don't get carried away. Black square. Yes.

Uh, marched in rallies. No. All right. Um, so tomorrow's going to be kind of interesting day. Do we have David Pan back on tomorrow? No, I think he's scheduled. He's on the schedule, but tomorrow, I don't know what the plan is with since tomorrow's the okay

oh shit oh that doesn't even make sense yeah okay hold on a second guys hold on oh god scratch everything I've just told you about when it's premiering tomorrow God I'm a jackass

I have no business organizing any of this okay stay tuned if you don't follow this real stuff on podcast and Instagram maybe now is the time just to give it a follow look at Mary's like oh my god yeah I don't know what the fuck's going on follow this real stuff on podcast and Instagram. Maybe now's the time just to give it a follow. Look at Mary's like, Oh my God. Yeah.

I don't know what the fuck's going on. I don't know what the fuck's going on. Let's just call Susan real quick. I don't think he, I think, I think what happened is Susan will, we're organizing it and I fucking interfered. And guess what that did.

I got out of the chain of command and I, and I think I, I fucked everything up. Connect the roadcaster. We just gotta call Susan and find out. It's definitely not at 7am tomorrow. That was a complete

fucking... What a mess that is. I fucked that all up. It can't be, right? Yeah, I don't think we can do that. So tomorrow there's going to be three or four shows. Tomorrow's going to be a busy day. But I have people coming into town.

I got to like... I can't be... I can't be doing podcasts all day. I'm going to drink tomorrow on the air. I would never do that. Yes! Is it ringing no i can't i can't hear it i can't hear it says it's calling um the cave dastro uh there just continues to be more and more steps to get to the behind the scenes

pay me here, follow me here, give me a standee buy my toothpaste hello? Sousa, hello? fuck oh there it is okay Fuck. Oh. Oh, there it is.

There it was. Okay. Oh, shit. Look at Audrey getting in a Brian friend, and y'all act like Brian required a lot. You guys are dipshits. That voice, too. You guys are assholes.

You made fun of Talking Elite Fitness and the Lone Ranger guys because they leveraged Don Falls' interview and put it behind the paywall. And now look at you, you scoundrel. You scoundrel. You scoundrel. If Brian would have been involved, none of this would have happened. Oh. Brian, you should just give it to Be Friendly to air on his station. Yeah. And you need to call him and say sorry.

You're retarded. You're just straight up retarded. Yeah. And you need to call him and say sorry. You're retarded. You're just straight up retarded. Yeah. She doesn't sound like that? I'm not going to make her sound good. Oh, hi, Savon. I just wanted to let you know. That's right, she says.

That if you gave your says that if, uh, if, uh, if you gave you behind the scenes to Brian, this shit would be tight, but instead you tranny looking fucking Armenian douche nozzle, your shit's all fucked up. You can't even decide on a time.

Just send that link over to Brian friend. Let him upload it to be friendly. Be a pal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Love Audrey. Yeah.

She knows. Savon, you sound like Joe Dirt. Oh, Reckon? Okay, fine. Reckon. Savon, I reckon, uh... I reckon, uh, you need a standee. The only time I don't need a standee is when I'm in between standees. Oh, Audrey.

Uh, Savant sounds like Joe Biden, uh, impersonator. All right. I don't want to go. I want to hang out with you guys. Oh, look. $2 more. Look at it. For Caleb to paint underneath that shelf.

Hey, what is that white thing right there? Is that like a shortwave radio? This? Yeah. This is the box for the Rodecaster. Oh, God. It looks nice. And then this is a Wacom tablet.

A what? Wacom tablet. What's that mean? Oh, wait. Oh, for like Photoshop shit? Yeah, my mom gets... She's like, I don't need it anymore. I was like, all right, I'll take it.

Oh. I haven't figured out how to use it yet, though. A Cave Dastro. Wow, this is brutal. The only time Sebi doesn't need a stand is when he's giving one. My goodness. Hmm. This is brutal. The only time Seve doesn't need a standee is when he's giving one. My goodness. Listen, if I don't get to a thousand fucking members by tomorrow, I'm not screening it at all. Taking your money, jumping in the Honda Civic, and running.

Y'all better sign up. You better sign up. You better appreciate me. I make the only behind the scenes it's worth watching. There, Sarah. Good. Nice. Thank you.

Nice. There we go. That's all I wanted, Sarah. All right. Never mind. It's still on. I don't know what time, though. I have no idea what time.

None. I called Sousa. Oh, he's at the gym. Oh, okay. I'll text you. Okay. When is the behind-the-scenes tomorrow going live? Some people want to know some people are asking all 200 of you guys yeah hey that could be interesting what if i did do it tonight at midnight that could be really interesting happy new year wow oh wow that's interesting what oh that'd be 3 a.m for will and he's the one who's supposed to

set his alarm don't be a pussy will i ain't staying up late now you could you but the thing is you can watch it anytime I think if you're a member correct maybe okay well I'll let you know maybe I'll come on later today oh maybe I'll make something for the members

okay yeah when I know I'll make a video and tell you guys. A member video. Heidi Kroom, this is a fucking big deal. He can't do that easily. Oh, we already released the timeline? Oh, did we? What the fuck's going on? It was in our story, but...

Was there a time? Uh, let me check. That would be fucking crazy if we announced it 7 a.m. That'd be awesome. What if I released it the same time I was live just to compete with my own show? Just to fuck myself.

Hubert Flores! Whoa, that was close. I almost got off the air. Yeah, and I am going to do a live stream after. I want to. I want to. Yeah, that would be cool, right? I'll even... I'm going to be pretty brazen after that show, too.

I'm going to be high on myself. So, like, I'll call people and shit. Oh, here's what they were talking about. I'll call at least one person per show. Make it just really fucking high stress. Let's see. Oh, okay. Viewer's Guide.

To get early access to the behind the scenes, you have to be CEO. What's the difference? You get first access to all 15 episodes. Okay. Oh, but no time. Oh, okay. Keep going. Yeah, right here.

A new episode will be released every Monday and Wednesday at 7 a.m. Pacific Standard Time, starting January 1st with Part 1A. Oh, not no time. Oh, okay. Keep going. Yeah, right here. A new episode will be released every Monday and Wednesday at 7 a.m. Pacific Standard Time starting January 1st with part 1A. Oh, not this Monday. Except for this Monday. Except for this Monday. Already up to a fucking, already off to a bad start. Fuck. Uh.

Oh. oh yeah that wow that's pretty good I think that the so I think the 14th okay all right I feel like the last 20 minutes have just been a skit The Seve plan no Isn't it always Yeah I mean yes I liked how the Ricky Gervais Show was like hey

That that that have you seen that Netflix Special he did I watched it last night at Greg's house It's really good He's good it wasn't even so much Funny i mean it is funny but he's just um i like how he articulates things he was just sharing some ideas like sometimes i struggle with the fact that like this is me who's on the show but it's also not me i'm also performing yeah no plan b whatever it is there's no plan it's just part a trash or both a and b a and b are both trash i mean you guys are gonna like it listen my my life

is so my life is so rich my trash is your treasure like you know you know what i mean like i shit in like day like i shit my toilet in five before i can flush daisies are growing out of it i mean so yeah performing or fake step on yeah i don't sometimes i don't even know it's a it's a fake performance can i can i do that um who is the 14 year old who told sebi he didn't have a professional show that was the 14 year old who told Seve he didn't have a professional show? That was the highlight of 2023. I kind of remember that. Russell Berger fucking text me the other day and said something to me like that. Like that was like supposed to be like a compliment, but like, but it's not.

You know what I mean? Yeah. God, I love your organic smell of fucking manure that comes from your mouth oh thank you I love the way you smell when you haven't showered for a week yeah I don't think I'm doing a highlight show that would takes too much work

did I heard Hiller made one how is it I watched it but it But it's out. Posted three hours ago. His Sporty Beth video is absolutely amazing. That was so good. Wow, the promo video that we made

for fucking Pedro's show has 10,000 fucking views. That's fucking nuts. Wow. Let me watch some of this here. Oh, shit. Why?

Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? I like that video where he made the... And why? I made a serious mistake. Not as serious as yours. Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? I think it's great that you wanted this. The name is Lee, all right? And Lee doesn't have a level one because they aren't real. Lee could not have possibly taken the judges course because they aren't real.

And Lee got accepted to judge at the CrossFit Games and isn't real. I'm like that Santa Claus, but instead of a bell, I've got a sign. I'm standing in front of a Jewelosco. Oh, I like this. Did he say Jewelosco? He's standing in front of a Jewelosco? No, no, thank you. That's the humble example.

Oh, shit. Oh, no. We try to grab. Which is where Spiegel always is. You want to look at Sporty Beth? Which one of the two do you want to be? You choose Schwarzenegger. You choose Gal Gadot because she's Wonder Woman.

Oh, my God, this episode's gonna be crazy. Hiller's gonna ding you. I'm gonna fucking ding you, Jeremy. Oh, Jeremy, I still haven't opened your email. I saw it. It looked important, so I haven't opened it yet. And it's from a

fucking droid. Not your email, your text. Sorry. All right. When I was looking away watching Hiller, did we get any more members? No. Hubert. Hubert.

Hubert. Hubert? Now, welcome, Hubert. It's a Mexican last name, but Hubert's not a Mexican first name, is it? I don't know. I've known some Latin Huberts. Licky. Ajo.

Azor. Azor. Azor. Licky. Azor. Humberto. Oh. Umberto, okay. Yeah, that's definitely Mexican Umberto. Oh Here we go, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Chris. Hi Chris Albrecht smart. Hey, very smart. I Can't tell you when but I can tell you tomorrow one shitty behind the scenes episode.

It's me and Raleigh. I gave it my all. I gave it my all. Even if you don't like it, know I gave it my all. One time, I bought my mom a Christmas present and my dad said something like, hey, that was a dumb Christmas present. And I go, it's the thought that counts. And he goes, no, it's not.

I was like, wow. Wow. What's going on with the sponsor banner? What do you mean? Where? What's he talking about? I have no idea. He's asked that a few times and I still don't know what he's talking about. What are you talking about? You think it should be bigger, easier to read?

What do you mean? What's going on with it? I can't... You know who has a really nice layout is Barbell Spin. His layout is so fucking nice. Every time I watch it, I'm like, God, I'm jealous. But I wonder if it's just because it's his. I just want what other people have.

but I wonder if it's just because it's his I just want what other people have alright cause there's only three what do you mean what's wrong with only three what do you mean I'm pretty stoked what are you talking about happy to have those three no yeah three paper street coffee ca peptides birth fit

what the the other ones just they're just uh do you they're just um i don't know uh three months or six months or you know what i mean? We had who did we have on there? We had Toastacers, which I have here somewhere. We had a Swolverine, which I have back here. Just in case they ever decide to give me money again, I'll talk about them. I got Dave's olive oil. I got Dave's olive oil I got a black cock in case I start fucking black guys again again

who was the other one was there another one oh the only one yeah they're just they're just you know three months here, four months there. I'm still taking my swolvering stuff. I just don't talk about it as much because actually I don't even know if I talk about it anymore or less. They were extremely generous and helped incredibly with the behind the scenes when they came in with the project at the games. That was incredibly with the behind the scenes. When they came in.

With the project at the games. That was kind of the deal with them. None of your fucking business. But I'll tell you anyway. The deal with them is. When we were going to have a presence at the games. And we were going to be doing all those shows at the games. They were nice enough.

I think they sent me a bunch of swolverine to my hotel room. Or some shit. And they gave us a bunch of money and they said, Hey, I want to support what you're doing. I said, cool. Thanks.

I love creating pre-workout and all that shit. I got a new year's workout for you to do for you to do today, Jeremy. Oh, great. No. no all right um stay tuned oh let me see oh i gotta go Oh, let me see.

Oh, I got to go. Hey, dude, what's up? I'll see you guys later. Bye-bye. Hey.