The Sevan Podcast - Kill Taylor Ep. 2 | Random CrossFitters take on Taylor Self LIVE

Episode Date: May 6, 2024

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Make your nights unforgettable with American Express. Unmissable show coming up? Good news. We've got access to pre-sale tickets so you don't miss it. Meeting with friends before the show? We can book your reservation. And when you get to the main event, skip to the good bit using the card member entrance.

Let's go seize the night. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash yamex. Benefits vary by card. Other conditions apply. Bam, welcome to Kill Taylor. In the top left-hand corner is Andrew Hiller from Hiller Fit. Right below him, Tyler Watkins.

Heat One app. Founder of the Heat One app. Caleb beaver on the back end running the clock bryson bryson oversized shirt del monte uh running the pyrotechnics at the facility you are looking at crossfit charlotte you are looking at the animal that we have learned to love and know as Taylor self. This show is brought to you by vindicate VNDK eight.com. It's a thousand dollars. If you can beat Taylor and hear the, the moment we've been waiting for the workout week two for a thousand dollars,

21 calories. If you have a penis, 15 calories, if you have a vagina, 21 calories if you have a penis, 15 calories if you have a vagina. 21 burpee box getovers to 48 inches, regardless of your genitalia. 21 bar muscle-ups. Is the genitalia check mandatory before we start?

He will be going here in like 50 seconds. Also, like any good show, we brought in some star power, the quarterback of the Chicago Bears, Tyson Bajent, also hardcore CrossFitter. Tyson, I'll show you the workout one more time, buddy. You ready for this? Yeah. Here we go. 21 calories, 21 burpee box getovers, 48 inches, 21 bar muscle-ups,

Taylor Self in the house, Andrew Hiller, Tyler Watkins, Tyson Bajent, and me, the Sevan Pogic. We're very close to starting. We got a new clock on the wall. Caleb will fire up the clock in the lower left-hand corner. Watch closely. This will be the time that you guys will all want to beat, that none of you have a chance of beating. And that's why we're pretending to give you $1,000 if you can beat him. Oh, here we go.

Under, over, pillar. Under, over, what? What's the line? Five, four, three, two, one, go. Three. I'm going to say it takes over under three minutes. Three minutes? I go under. It's going to be a touch over three

Not much Come on Taylor Oh no Just kidding What happened What happened Somebody put the clock to stop at ten Oh shit

How pissed is he 10 out of 10 pissed That's the most infuriating thing on the planet Stop at 10. Oh, shit. How pissed is he? Andrew, how pissed is he? 10 out of 10 pissed. That's the most infuriating thing on the planet. Is he going to get a crazy adrenaline dump? No, he'll be fine. It's just you want to throw the rubber. Hold on, Tyler. Let me ask a real athlete here.

Hold on, Tyler. Tyson, you walk out onto the field. You think the game is going to start, and then it doesn't start, or there's an off-sides penalty. How do you manage that? Is he pissed? It's's fucked the whole thing's fucked hey give me the workout one more time give me the workout uh the workout uh i'll pull the workout up on the screen one more time here uh the workout is uh 21 calories for the boys 15 for the girls

and 21 burpee box overs at 48 inches and 21 bar muscle ups brought to you by Vindicate VNDK8.com it's all the apparel for all the cool kids is there we have the countdown again right now if you're not cool you can also buy from Vindicate

just so everybody knows I don't want anyone wearing my shit unless they're cool. Fair. Taylor, still our first false, some sort of false start, a clock malfunction. Five, four, three, two, one, go. We're off the races. I said it was going to be over three.

It's going to be under three. Because those box getovers, he's going to probably do about 13 a minute. 235. 235? 235. Under over 235? Because I'm going over. The reason they didn't predict you to 235, what do you predict, Taylor?

Probably, I'll go with the over price is right style but i'll give you a 244 242 oh and how do you how are you coming up with that time can you break it up by by piece well if you're doing a longer workout you kind of hang on to 20 cals a minute if you're a guy but he's going after one shot at it that'll be about 50 seconds the the burpee box get over is about 13 reps a minute if he's sprinting it and then he's doing the barbell slips up Bro, you're 50 so 48 seconds. Yeah Oh, there we go. The clock in the lower left hand corner is working again. Nice work Caleb three or four seconds a rep right here

Transition was immaculate from the rower to the box. Trace, do you ever do these with that wall you got in your backyard? This shit I do is way harder than this. Yeah. Oh, we got a 256 guess. So everyone agrees under three minutes. Yeah, it'll be under three. Is he not going fast enough?

He's got to take it. I love that burpee on the floor. He might be worried about the bar muscle-up at the press. Yeah, you got to have some juice getting to the muscle-up. Come on, Taylor. I feel like he should be showing a little more athleticism here. A little bit more quick twitch. Yeah, a little spring up there.

What about his wide grip on the box? That's okay. I've even seen people kind of grab. See how he's grabbing the end of the box with that outside hand? That's kind of what people do. Now what we're going to have a fun time with if people call in is getting on people for going around the box. He's doing a good job of getting over the middle of it.

Okay. Important distinction. Did you hear that, people? You have to go over the box, not around it. Oh. See that back leg's going right through the middle? That was good. Now he's going to go unbroken.

Yeah. 244. Here we go. That's not going to happen. 21 mark on slopes. That's one. He's not going to do it unbroken? I mean, he will, but our times are all going to be too slow.

He'll be just shy of three, it's looking like. This is going to be his fifth. Five. Six. Wow, those look so good. Seven. This is his thing. Eight.

Oh, he's over three minutes. Tav, he's not going 13-8. Are you out of your mind? He's at 11 unbroken already. I bet that he can go 40-50 unbroken. 13. You think? Oh, yeah.

That's more than Hiller's record. I know it is. Yeah, he's better at the bar muscle than I. Jonathan Ortega putting in a last-minute guess at 315. Janelle wins at 345. Oh, damn. 18. We were all quick. This is going to be his 20th, and he's got one more.

Last one coming up. You can't put in the last thing to guess. Oh, damn. 312. 312. No one's going to touch that. Wow. Okay.

Really quick here. Which clock are we going off of? The one in the room, correct? The one in the room, yeah. Okay, and so we got a 312. 312. And we can always do a replay. Right off the bat, Tyson, what did you think about his performance?

Unbelievable. Unbelievable. I think that 99% of the world would still be doing this workout at seven minutes. Is he getting off the rower? Tyler, any concerns about him not being quicker on the row or the box overs? I know that the muscle ups look just about perfect. You could do the box overs faster, but you're going to fuck yourself for the muscle ups.

And his muscle ups were perfect. I don't think you can beat him. Hiller, this is a game of seconds, and he did take, I'm going to guess, what looked like maybe a two-second transition time between the box and the muscle-ups. He stood under the bar for about one second, and then I think he could have got up there two seconds faster if you would have taken out all the dilly-dallying.

Is that a fuck-up on his part? No, because I think that anybody's going to underestimate how much chest and pressing is involved in this burpee box get-over, which is probably why we almost failed that 21st round. Give me that water. Okay, so it's not just the box over. You're saying because the box is so high, there's a big chest and tricep piece there of kind of a push-up there.

Okay, so the crowd is saying Matt Brady's saying $1,500 next week showing Faith and Taylor's performance. But before we get to that, you need to know that Vindicate, V-N-D-K-8.com, is putting up the $500 that will be added to the $500 that Matuthian and Doc Spartan gave last week. Is it safe? Yes, it's safe. It's very safe. So safe you wouldn't believe it.

Is it safe? You want to go to VNDK8..com vindicate.com there will be very shortly a lot of kill taylor also a paraphernalia uh available we have a taylor with us now if you want to try and take a shot and just have us completely fucking ass pound you feel free to text in right now to nine to eight five eight three three nine We got two little Jersey pussies that are supposed to be joining the stream and trying to beat me they've been talking shit all week Tyson what's happening brother? How are you? Wow crazy Tyson, what's up? What's happening, brother? How are you? Wow, crazy.

Taylor, had you tried that before? Is that the first time you did that? First time. I haven't done a burpee getover in like seven or eight months. And what did you think about the... what do you mean seven or eight months? Isn't that what happened? Is that a joke? No, I haven't done one of those, the 48 inch ones. Okay. In like six or seven months, seven or eight months.

Did you think you had any hiccups or anything? My last couple just felt really sticky on the bar, pressing out. How about anywhere else? Are you happy with your transitions? Oh, shut the fuck up, pool boy. My class is still going. Otherwise, I'd try. I'm looking for the podcast phone number so I could send you the link. I fucked that

all up. Is there anything you think you could do faster on that? My chest has exploded. I mean, you could run faster on that? My chest has exploded. You could run a little harder maybe, but I was on the verge of failing that last bar muscle-up. I saw that. Hey, what's your biggest

set of bar muscle-ups you think? Have you done one? I don't know that I've ever done one. You got 40 to 50 in you? Wow, I don't know. That 21 was hard. That workout, just a fresh set. I bet you can get 45 plus. Maybe. I can move really fast on them, but I don't know that my top end is that good. The texts are pouring in for people who want to take the challenge. I have sent an invite to someone with a droid.

Do you want to move up front? No droids. Right, I know. What a douche. We're going to take everything up front in the office, but we're not going to jump off the stream. We're just going to carry the shit.

And I'm sending another link out to someone who just texted me and said, ready. I'll get the – No context. Just ready. Yeah. Just ready. And I love it.

That's all you need to send ready. I'm just randomly – the texts are pouring in, and I'm just sending – I just sent out two links. We'll take whoever jumps in first. Dylan Lowen, the husband, the guy who's banging the fittest chick in america if i was fit 20 pounds lighter and good at crossfit i'd whoop that ass fair enough uh one more one more look also let's take a quick look at the workout here um we the show is completely rigged taylor gets to make the workout it's 21 calories for penises

15 for vaginas on the rower 21 Burkley box jump overs for the inch box one bar muscle ups the time to beat is 312 Here we can we talk about that number you know, it's not typical someone just said I'm anti-vax pick me Absolutely, you're in you're on a droid to you douche Three invites Someone just said I'm ready to make a thousand dollars. I've sent you a link. I'm sending out links guys, by the way Oh, why did these all say they're droids? This is making me concerned like it's my phone Is anyone getting links oh

Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Holy shit. We're going to take them in order. We got one person. DeVito, you're in the wing waiting. Taylor with his handler, Bryson Del Monte, on the big screen. There's like a horse.

We are now in. Yeah, boy. What's your name? Niall. Niall, what's up, dude? Where are you at? Pennsylvania. Where are you?

Pennsylvania. Here, just plug in then. What did you think about Taylor's performance? Really hard to beat. I'm not as good as him with bar muscles so that'll be uh be tough how long have you been doing how long have you been doing crossfit uh like 10 years and uh your setup is amazing thank you very good it's a dope spot thank you all right hillary do you have any advice for him yeah if he's not got bar muscle

up she's gonna have to fly on the rower and that's not going to save him. Yeah. Makes sense. Uh, any words of wisdom for him? Uh, Mr. Self Taylor,

Taylor, any words of wisdom for him? Taylor. Can you hear me? Yes. Yeah. Fuck you. That's my words of wisdom.

Wouldn't expect anything less. All right, buddy. We're ready when you're ready. Let's get some. Thanks for doing this. Let's see him. I appreciate now doing this and I hope he does well, but I also hope that he falls over on those red boxes.

I can still hear you. Those are not sturdy boxes. I do like his box. Are they even Velcro? They're not even Velcro. It's not regulation. They have Velcro strips on the top and bottom. He's got a lady in the house. Hello.

Hello. Will T says he's here for Tyson Bajan. Fair enough. How tall are you, Niall? 6'4". Damn! 6'4". Who's that?

He's going to do rebounding box jump overs guys can you guys see the clock all right we can thank you very courteous of you that's a nice setup for the clock they've built that uh nick nick sebon resists the urge to ask to see the woman thank you i needed that all right thank you i appreciate it exactly what I was thinking for like five times I had to push that thought away. There's a 10 second countdown on the clock. Ready? Fair enough. I hope it doesn't fuck up like it did with Taylor. Yeah, that was annoying.

Oh no, he's got an OPEX sign and there he has no shot. Damn. Damn. Jim Fitzgerald's watching him from somewhere. Pace that roll. Dude, this guy's setup is amazing. Great. Under or over four?

Four thirty. Four thirty. Four thirty. I'm going over, but I think it's going to be like four or five. Four or five? Caleb in the back end rubbing his forehead stressed out because he knows he shit the bed on the clock. No one's safe.

Who shit the bed? I did? No, not you. Sorry, Caleb. Caleb fucked the clock up, and so I could see him rubbing his forehead like fuck. Oh, man. Yeah, he's at 29 seconds. Oh, what's he rolling? A 16? He's fucked. He's not beating me. He's 6'4". You got to roll a 2,000, bro. You're 6'4". What'd you roll, Taylor? I rolled a 1,700. going to 16 he's fucked he's not beating me he's six four you gotta row a 2000 bro you're six four

would you row taylor i rode a 1700 there you go there we heard you oh heidi croon dollar 99 let's see the beaver transitions too swell to dollars. Oh, he's not going to a name. Oh, he's gonna whoop up on you Let's go Niall Pretty sure those are Batman shoes I'm pretty sure those are Batman shoes Men don't go to their knees dude Stop What was that?

He almost leapt over it What are those shoes he's wearing? Was he at a Lady Gaga concert last night? What the fuck are those things? Combat boots? Combat boots concert last night what the fuck are those things combat boots i bet they're size 17 or something he's six foot four is he wearing a belt is he wearing a no no yeah dude you got a belt up for this he got fucked don't slow down, Niall. Let's go. Come on, Niall.

Oh, no. Hey, Taylor, he looks more athletic than you going over the box. I'm going to tell you that. No, he doesn't. Shut the fuck up. You look like a fucking robot going over. Me? Dude, I make those look so easy.

Bryson, he says I look unathletic. I heard him say that. Bryson said you're excited. Bryson didn't confirm nor deny on that. You see that? There was no spring in your step. What are you talking about? Let's go, Niall. You can't do that.

You can't do that. Let's go, Niall. He took a breath. He's taking a breath. He can't do that. He's got to breathe. Hold your breath, Niall. Yeah.

Hold your breath. I think that's 20. You think Tyson Bajan takes a moment in the pocket to take a deep breath? Are you out of your fucking mind? Here we go. Let's go, Niall. Let's go.

Oh, my God. Holy shit. I'm going to show you how to go on broken. Nice. Get up there Alright There you go There you go Hey is he really 6'4 or was he joking

I wouldn't doubt it Everybody Everybody says they're 2 inches taller than they are I'm 5'7 I'm 5'7 Everybody says they're two inches taller than they are. I'm 5'7". I'm 5'7". Oh, Nile. Oh, we did say 4.5. The winning time was three minutes and 12 seconds by Taylor Self.

It is the time that will haunt all of you. It is not beatable. Come on, Nile. I need my bat to win right here. Nile, get your ass up there. What are you doing? Yeah, what's he at get your ass up there. What are you doing? Yeah, what's he at? What's he at? What are you doing? He's at seven.

Oh, this is eight. I'm scared. Seven minutes. Tyson's going to take this one. I was thinking he was set a seven cat. What'd you say, 435? Set a seven cat. I said 430, 430. 430.

Hey, I'm lost. Yeah. Set a seven cat. He's not going to get 430. He.30. I'm lost. He's not going to get 4.30. He's going to get 5. 5 something. Come on. I should have had another cup of coffee this morning. Come on now.

He took Sharon's advice and he held his breath. You're almost done, buddy. I was paying for it. His torso is as long as my whole body. That's not the only thing. He's got the tits long. That's as my whole body. That's not the only thing. He's got the tits long. That's Stefan's whole body. 15.

All right, six more. Come on, two seconds. He's going to go 3-3. Come on, Niall. He should just sell out and go all six. Come on, dude. Fall off the bar. Die on the podcast.

They ain't going to do themselves, Niall. Get up there. For those of you who just joined, it's 21 calories on the rower for the boys, 15 for the girls, 21 burpee box getovers at 48 inches, and 21 bar muscle-ups. The time to beat is 312. Come on. Let's go, Niall.

Hold on, buddy. Yeah. Come on. He's coming, Niall! Hold on, buddy! Yeah, baby! He's got another. Come on, Niall! Let's go, Niall! Do singles! Get up there! I remember my first bar muscle-up. It looked just like that.

Nice. Attaboy. Niall will not be winning the money from Vindicate. VNDK8.com. Niall will not be winning the money. He might get a one-of-a-kind Kill Taylor shirt that we're working on. Good job, dude. I thought it was 29.21 for some reason. I'm an idiot.

Hey, Niall, how much do you weigh? Like 225. And do you have semifinal aspirations? To be on a team, I kind of know I'm a little too big and I'm a little older. So it'd be hard for me to make a run at semis individually. But I was on a team on quarterfinals just a couple weeks ago. Didn't go well, but the goal would be to try and make it on a team.

And when did you get the idea to come on to kill Taylor and make a run at him? The second I saw last week's video. Yeah. and make a run at them? The second I saw last week's video, I thought it was just a really cool concept and figured before the prize spot gets too big, I got to hop on because there's going to be a lot of other people that are trying to take that money. Good stuff, dude. All right, brother.

And do you train at an affiliate? No, I'm at an OPEX gym. Okay. Oh, I see that. And what's the name of the gym you're at opex lancaster okay and why do you choose an opex gym over a crossfit gym any reason particular uh careful there's not enough time on this podcast to talk about that uh but mostly uh i wanted more one-on-one coaching, like one-on-one programming. And it was hard to find that at the affiliates around me.

So I reached out to this OPEX gym. It's owned by a guy who's owned an affiliate in the area. So he has positive experience. And it's just, I really like him. He and I get along really well. Well, it makes me really happy that you didn't win. Listen, stay in touch. We'd love to send you a Kill Taylor shirt.

We don't have one yet, but we'd love to do that. And thanks for coming on, Udaman. Yeah, thanks for having me, guys. Appreciate it. Good job, Niall. Good job. Hey, I went to rehab right outside of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, dude. We're basically from the same place.

Where are you from? I said I went to rehab right outside of Lancaster. Really? He was reborn. He was reborn there. Was it Amish? Four months. Four months in an Amish barn. Although we didn't see your girl from the front, she

looks absolutely beautiful from the back. Thank you. I know. Thank you. Alright, guys. Our first It's absolutely beautiful from the back. Thank you. I know. Thank you. Thank you. All right, guys. Our first victim is gone. Taylor Self is here.

The next victim is waiting in the wings. DeVito, Taylor, tell me really quick, what about when the clock fucked up? Was that really bad? No, it just really fucking annoyed me. And I know it wasn't Bryson's fault, but I got so fucking pissed at him for a second i was like give me the fucking remote i was just so pissed uh no i i mean that clock is just new you just sent it to us thank you very much for that and so i think we have to set the time like we have to set the clock time every time you use it it doesn't just stay preset if that makes sense yep and you're in crossfit uh charlotte in the entryway yeah buddy uh oh i'm turning the laptop not the computer let's see this is the right back there is dope yeah that's

like a bunch of murals um we have a photographer we have a camera guy boomer he's got four emmys he shot for 30 for 30 espn so he's got four emmy awards so he did all his pictures and shit wow just so you know we have one more contestant in the wings and then after that we have another contestant that is a I think it's a games athlete and it's a girl oh wow wow who we'll see shortly

we will see very shortly DeVito what's up dude what's up guys tell me your full name Mike DeVito. Anti-vaxxer. Does he have any chance of winning, Tyson? What's up, guys?

I'm glad my anti-vax comment got me on. I don't see it. I don't see it. I don't see it. Hey, how old are you, Mike? 36. You look 39. Good talk. Oh, Mike. Hello, 39. Good talk.

Oh, Mike. Hello, Mike. 41. 41. Oh, I was close. Oh, my God. You have no chance in fucking hell, dude. Damn right I look 39.

For that age, that ain't bad. Christ. Right. We need to set an age limit on this. We need to set an age limit on this. I don't even weigh a lot, guys. This shit has to look realistic. We can't let a guy who's 41 on a field.

We're going to get beaten up on old people. Wait till you hear this. I only weigh 160 pounds, and I'm only 5'7". Wow. I beat you, dude. Is this your brother? No, the runner's got to fuck off. Taller brother.

21 calories? Are you on performance enhancing drugs say yeah be honest mike be honest he lied right there nothing i'm still waiting for them peptides to come in the mail look how chiseled that jaw is he might he might have his nutrition dial look at him okay we're ready we'd like to see you get at this. Let's go. So there's a delay. What do you mean? There's a delay on mine. I keep hearing myself.

Should I do anything? No, you're good. You should start rowing, homie. Fair enough. Fair enough, Hiller. Fair enough. Hey, can you turn your phone? Yep. Nice. You the man. Yeah, I got you. Uh-oh. What'd you do? You did something. No, we're good. I got to figure out how to flip the camera. Oh the man. I got you. What'd you do? You did something. I gotta figure out how to flip the camera.

Whatever you just did, don't do that. We're not even going to be able to see his roller. It looks like we're watching a 1960s box TV. He's in a loop for footage, but it's one... What the hell is that situation? Okay, that is right. 48. You're done. You're going to fall. You're dead.

I got my Savage 1es last weekend. I love the shoes. Best CrossFit shoes I've ever used. Thanks to the code during the quarterfinals. Yeah, the Savage Ones. Yeah, you're good, bro. You're good, bro. Certainly no Velcro on the between those two. Do not disappoint on the roasting. You guys better

bring the roasting. That's what I'm here for. Do not disappoint. Oh, my God. Let's go. He wants to be roasted. Caleb, get ready. Caleb Beaver on the back end. Get the clock ready.

Here we go. Nice, small, noble shorts. Let's go. This is the kid who joins the fucking varsity sports team. He's a freshman. He's like, just fuck me, guys. Just do it. Just beat me up, guys.

Here he goes. Is he really wearing Noble shirts? Oh, my God. Oh, he's fucked. Look at that Rotex. Oh, hell yeah. Pull a 22. Pull a 22.

Fell out. What do you mean? We can't see anything. Dude is sterile. What's the deal with the boxes? Is that dangerous? Yeah, he's going to eat shit. Remember when you said he was on steroids?

Do you still think so? Because I don't. No, I don't think so. I just think he's a... This yeah remember when you said he was on steroids do you still think so because i don't no i don't think so i just think he's a this guy looks like a try hard no offense devito sorry buddy trying way too hard on the road right now this is a guy that teaches like uh female athletes that don't want any advice how to do exercises after class because it's from him yeah dude come on this is that member of the gym who kicks everybody out when he's got to do a workout that's why it's empty in there guys i'm on the podcast get out of the gym so i think he did about he's right there with you taylor he's right there with you oh my god we lost He better not get tired on there. Oh my God.

How many reps will he knock over? Until he gets tired. That's a good knockover. As soon as he gets sloppy. Oh shit. He better keep getting springy off that ground. One false move, it's all over. But he's also

160. 160. It might not even matter if it gets sloppy. Right. Good point. Over the box, Mike, not around it. There we go. Mike DeVito making an attempt to break the 312 times set by Taylor Self,

win the $1,000. Mike, sell out. Let's go. I've seen every episode of Jersey Shore. That's a good comment. Hey, dude, I've seen a lot of those episodes, most of them, in fact. I would not have pegged you for that. I just do.

The drama was too much. You would definitely peg him. Yeah, but not for Jersey Shore watching. Oh, my God. Our new quarterback trainer for the Bears looks just like Pauly D. That's hilarious. I was like, dude, holy shit, I've never seen anybody look like Pauly D. Oh, geez.

Hey, look, come on. You see Joey Piero? You got to put those guys in next. These are the guys, the fucking stupid dumb idiots that actually think they have a chance of beating me. This guy beat me in quarterfinals. So fuck this guy. Put him in. Yeah.

Put these two Weedos in. Listen, we got two people lined up right now. I don't know if anyone else is going to make it. Anyone else is even going to have a shot at the thousand bucks. They're getting eye-folded. We know Mike DeVito ain't going to get it. Piero Joey smoked my pole taylor wow fuck this guy put him in let's go mike mike let's go mike he is yeah hey does he have any chance no chance what's the fastest someone can do the 21-bar muscle-ups? A minute?

Would you get Taylor 412? No, 312. 312. Is he locking out at the top? Who cares? He's already chicken-winging. That's four. Oh, five.

Well, he weighs 13 pounds. Six. It looks like he weighs 1,300. Who installed that rig, for fuck's sake? James Hibs, too. Oh, my God. If that guy said he was from OPEX, I would have kicked him off the show right there. Let's go, DeVito. Just been like, you're from OPEX, bye.

Yeah. Sonic boom. We are now past the three minutes and 12 seconds. There you go. That is the time that is impossible to beat. Oh, is he down to singles? Stop that. Yeah. Let's go, DeVito. Come on. DeVito knows

what he's about. DeVito, get your ass up there. Come on, buddy. Whatever you're at, add another two now. Add two more. Time! Hey, that one was good. He got up there. He fixed it.

How long do you, if we went off the stream with him, how long do you think he would go before he noticed? Oh, he's finished. See you, Mike. We're not here. See you tomorrow. 7 a.m. Live show.

Call in. Sub on. Dildo, this guy's moving like he ate 15 pounds of salami and some canola oil before this workout. Canola. Canola oil. 41 years old. You have no business doing this workout.

Next. Come on, Mike. Beat five, bro. We're about to be... We should have a time cap. Where is it? Yeah, what the fuck? Put a five-minute time cap on him.

Just boot him. Love you, Mike. You did great. Let's go, Mike. Oh, oh. There you go, Mike. There you go. Oh, shit.

Is that the last one? Done. Sounds good to me. Woo! 456. Wow. Is that the last one? Done. Sounds good to me. 456. Wow. What was the last guy? 505? Five something.

Yeah. Hey, you beat the last guy, Mike. You beat a giant. Thanks, guys. Hey, Nick. Yeah. Also, fuck your iPhones. I've been messing up group text threads

since 1983. Green bubble all day. Fuck y'all. Hey, what city are you in? What city are you in? Oh, man. Fuck this Android. My goodness. I'm also in PA, Delaware County.

And what's the name of the gym? Just outside of Philly. What's the name of the gym? It's My Friend's Gym. That's the name? My Friend's Gym? My Friend's Gym Sonic Boom Fitness, where I train at a CrossFit KLT.

CrossFit King of Pressure. I dropped in there one time on a Sunday, and the lady kicked me out. She wouldn't let me do my lifting for more than an hour. Of course she did. They do a lot of L1 seminars there, too. Well, I just want to say nothing screams I'm poor as fuck and a South American fucking immigrant than an android. Love you, buddy.

Jesus Christ. All right. Jesus Christ. All righty. Next up, Taylor, is anyone going to even come close to you? These guys next, if you pick these fucking Jersey cock meat sandwich eaters, I don't know, they probably will come close. The thing is, I'm not picking anyone. The texts are just coming in, and I'm just choosing them.

But here we have someone who I believe is a games athlete and is a girl. You think? Identifies as a girl, or is there an actual girl? No, she's a sweet piece of meat, this one. And she's going to give it her all, man. This chick don't fuck around. Our very own Jamie Latimer. What's up, girl?

Wow. Yeah, Jamie. We can't hear you. Where are you right now? I'm in my gym. Can you hear me? She's got the fisheye lens. I am on an android can you hear me

god damn it she'll probably still be working by the time I get back that's true can you hear me yeah we can hear you Jamie you know it's 15 cows on the rower yeah but I really want to lower those boxes stop no no no

I'm 40 years old and a girl Jamie have you been to the crossfit games I have not ever been to the crossfit games and a girl. Jamie, have you been to the CrossFit Games? I have not ever been to the CrossFit Games. Oh, okay. Okay. I thought maybe you've been to the Games. Okay. And will you make it this year?

Yes. You will make it this year. Okay. I would have made it to semis in the West. Okay. She was like 60th in the East or something. Let's go. Make sure you kick ass.

You're representing the podcast. Yeah, go hard. Let's go. Hey, do you foresee, Jamie, real quick before you start, do you foresee a sticking point anywhere? Yeah, the burpee back jump overs. I'm going to have to go kind of slow there because they're tall. Okay, don't do that. And if you do that, you're

done-sies. Yeah. All right. Caleb Beaver, get the clock ready.ie good luck thank you at least she's got the straps on them yeah girl about time someone does that thank you kevin doyle it shouldn't be a 40 inch fucking box they don't climb a 10 foot rope my god she is a brick shithouse hey however they do only have 15 calories where whereas it should be 18. So there's that.

Yeah, fucking. Let's go, Jamie. Jamie, is that your great-grandfather? That's Jim. He's the third-best man in the world to 65 plus. All right, fair enough. I know only six people entered that competition. She'll pull those knee sleeves up when she starts doing the box jump overs.

Pull this guy, Nick Fry. He's coming upegee frege okay frege what part of that argument is dumb nick life doesn't life doesn't fucking dictate between your height or female or male a wall is still a wall and who cares it's our show we don't want to give the money away let's go jamie 15 cows on the rower you guys the workout is 15 cows on the rower 21 burpee box get overs at 48 inches and 21 bar muscle-ups the only difference between the vaginas and penis workouts is on the rower everything else is the same hey tell the pull this comment up again. Nick Friji, they didn't adjust the log heights, you dumb fuck. And...

Muscle up logs? They didn't adjust the height of the women. These aren't logs, they're boxes. No, I don't give a fuck. We're about to find out if that Jamie Latimer body is all show or if it's got some go. He just bar on the rower she didn't pull him up way wrong taylor why didn't you choose 18 seconds for the

rower for the girls 18 calories because i didn't want to lower the boxes okay you didn't want to lose to jamie that's why exactly i don't think she this this swivel over methods is going to be so slow. I mean, I guess I probably could have changed the box height. There's no way a female is beating that anyways. The 21-bar muscle. Don't back down, Taylor. No, you couldn't.

Fuck it, dude. I'm empowering women. People are saying I'm a misogynist. I'm not inclusive of women. I'm empowering women to show how good they are by beating me at the same box height it'd be really good when you do something like diane and they got to use a 225 barbell 100 women don't need empowering they got enough power the unknown 100 scaling even a little bit in a mixed sex contest has more than a whiff of dei in it well thank you oh 100 bucks let's go

buddy the unknown man he'd just be handing it out. That's actually Blackman. That's a lot of money there, buddy. I did see a text come in saying I identify with being black. That will get you a free entry if I can find that. Travis Brault's got a full erection right now.

Jamie's body is fucking crazy. She's kind of cruising. And she's short. And she's fit. Taylor, you're not safe-safe. I'm 100% safe. David Gora, please stop giving the old people airtime.

Fair enough. I agree. This is going to be 20. Clydesdale Media, my girl, let's go. Is it? It should be on the way back. I think this is 20. Oh, you're right. You're right. This is 20. This is 21. You can see Jamie Latimer on the Clydesdale podcast.

She's a regular over there. Let's go, Jamie. Come on. Get on there. Pull that fucking... The time to beat is 312, people. 312. She's on pace to beat is 312, people. 312. She's on pace to beat it.

No, she's not. She's on pace. A thousand bucks from Vindicate. She's on pace. Oh, she's not. Oh, don't. Yes, she is. She's not on pace, though.

Taylor, you're going to lose, Taylor. So, Jamie? Evan. Yeah. No shot. She's going to break at 11. Oh. You want to bet a thousand bucks, Hiller?

All right. Here we go. I absolutely do not want to bet $1,000. I don't think I'm even right. Let's go, Jamie. Let's go. You're close. Let's go, Jamie. Oh, shit. 12.

There we go. 12. There we go. 13. 3-12. 3-12. We passed the time to beat. She's doing great.

She's going to have the best time of the day outside of Taylor. Nice. Wow. Wow. Come on. Seven to go. She's doing great. She's going to have the best time of the day outside of Taylor. Nice. Wow. Wow. Come on, seven to go. I don't know. You think she's got seven in a row? I think that was a full set.

I don't think she's got that. She knows we should kick her off right away. Yeah, fucking seven or die. Like, come on. No investment. Oh, man, the kip swing. Oh, yeah. Let's go, Jamie.

Let's go, Jamie. Hey, you need to sign up for Sentinel. Get that kip swing tightened up. Come on, don't come down. Don't come down. She'll hold on. Come on, Jamie! Jamie!

Chicken wing. 20 last ones. Come on! Let's go, Jamie! Nice. Wow. 20 last one come on let's go jamie that's one go nice wow i guess you get a t-shirt but that's it good job jamie you have the nicest rig in the room you have the nicest rig in the room.

You have the nicest rig in the room. Sarah Cox, 50 bucks, capeptides.com. Contact. Dude, anything, this will be my first time making it. So anything, chair, anybody, helping me get to the games would be so huge. All right, well, you'll get the shirt. I don't know if that'll help, but.

You are. Pre-chewed. Sorry. When you say help, Taylor wanted to give you some advice on your muscle-ups. Is that what you mean? Yeah, we've got to tighten that kip swing up. That's fine, too. I have a torn labrum, so I'll do what I can do today.

I tore my wife's labrum last night. Oh, my gosh. Labium? Labium's labrum last night. Oh my gosh. Labium? Labium or labium? Oh, sorry, sorry. My anatomy is all fucked up. Hey, what's a labium? Jamie, absolutely amazing performance.

What did you think your time would be? Did you perform like you wanted? Did you execute like you wanted to? Close. I mean, I said I wanted to break 410 and what was her time guys 401 401 and uh being and being on the show do you think that that helped you push harder yeah probably yeah all right good and what gym are you at? Redemption Fitness, 10K. It's my gym. I own it. Oh, okay. In what city? Holt, Michigan, just outside of Lansing.

Hey, absolutely amazing performance. You are a beautiful human being inside and out. I've known you for a long time, and it's great to see you do this. And you are, as hard as it is for me me to say this say something nice to anyone on the show you are true inspiration to a lot of human beings out there and thanks for being you i think i thank you i thank you for the opportunity next weekend was so nice so i was like i better get my shot now while i can all right girl have a good day good job jamie jamie ladimir hey mike devito that's how you answer the gym question. Not, it's my brother's gym.

My buddy's gym. What gym are you at? My brother's gym. All right, put these fucking idiots in, dude. We are 43 minutes into the show. I don't think we can get more than one or two people. Dude, I want some excitement. Well, this next one's going to be exciting. It's going to be exciting.

We have our first repeat. Oh, my God. We have our first repeat. No, no, no. This guy, this is going to be a problem, guys. If it's the big dude, it ain't going to be a problem. Brandon Smith back on the show. Hell, yeah.

Oh, bitch. With the shirt. He's going to be doing five Z Brandon Smith back on the show. Hell yeah. Oh, bitch. With the shirt. He's going to be doing five Zs on the fucking muscle-ups, dude. We'll be starting the clock 10 seconds late for him because he's wearing a CEO shirt. Thank God he's got an eye. Oh, my God. I'm sorry. You beat me, Brandon.

Tripping. Brandon, before you start, do you really think you have a shot? Okay. You're good now. Brandon, do you really think you have a shot? Okay. You're good now. Brandon, do you really think you have a shot? Do you have a shot? Oh, come on. Come on, pussy.

Wow. All right, Brandon's off the show. You're off the show. This gym is so awesome. Brandon, if you're working out with guys who have the same physique as me, you're fucked. Yeah, that guy's got to put a shirt on. Look at his hair. Crying out loud.

What is that? Who's your workout partner? Sevan, too? Oh, my God. You guys go to the same barber, Brandon? You and that guy? For crying out loud. Where do you guys get your haircuts, for fuck's sake? Hey, that guy's stomach looks like those things you jump off of a dock and bounce on and fucking shoot people up in the water. Oh, my God. What are they called?

Does he have a belt on? Does that dude have a belt on? I think he's pregnant. He's going to need therapy. That guy's going to need therapy for a month after this show. We'll just get him in there with John Young. Holy shit. Hey, Brandon, you're out.

I want that guy to do the workout instead now. Let's go, Brandon. Y'all ready? Yeah. Are we ready? Is Brandon ready? He sounds like he shouldn't have called in. V-5, full foam.

There's a 10-second countdown. I've never seen Dude, Where's My Car? It's like those two brothers, the defenders of the galaxy, Brandon and that guy. I guess it is true, David Reed says men can get pregnant. It reminds me of Louis Simmons. What does? His gut.

Oh, okay. Yeah, his hair reminds me of a fucking friar tuck from fucking King Oh, okay. Yeah, his hair reminds me of a fucking friar tuck from fucking King Arthur, dude. Shave that shit off, dude. What the fuck? Brandon Smith's second appearance. Come on, Brandon. Totally random, guys, how I just send out the links.

I don't even look to who I'm sending them from. Kind of amazing that he's gotten in twice. The workout is 21 cows on the rower 21 burpee box get overs at 48 inches then 21 bar muscle-ups the time to beat is three minutes and 12 seconds set by the man himself kill taylor and uh if you beat that time you got a nice good 20 seconds ahead of taylor's time right now taylor's balls just went up inside of his stomach but he just takes he has to take a hitch step i don't't know, dude. We'll see. Springy.

Look springy up there. He texted me. He said he was really good on the burpee box jump overs. Like Taylor was really good. And so I'm guessing he's trying to build time on the rower. The audience even knows. Uh-oh. Clock.

Uh-oh. They know. Come on, Brandon. Hey. Wow. clock uh-oh they know come on brandon hey wow i like it more when taylor's nervous because then he gets all weird taylor's just sitting on his laurels i'm gonna slow down slow down brandon it's too fast bro 13 wait Wait, what is that, 14? I think he's got, this is gonna be 13 13 Where we at, coach? He's on pace

14. Fuck, he's on pace He's on pace God, he stays behind that box a long time, though So did Taylor, though Probably even longer if he has to meet Taylor Shut up 16, this is 17 Hans at One Life CrossFit Probably even longer if you ask me, Jalen. Shut up. Come on. 16. This is 17.

Hans at One Life CrossFit in Santa Maria is ready to go. Good luck, Hans. 18. Ooh, can he do 21 in a minute? 19. What is Beauty and Brains LLC? $50.01? There you go, buddy.

Come on. Uh-oh. Come on. Get up there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, shit. Oh, no. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's done. He's on. Uh-oh. Come on. Get up there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, shit. Oh, no, no, no, no. You gotta not be a little bitch, Brandon. You gotta do them in a minute. That's all. He has a minute.

Three minutes and 12 seconds to be won. You gotta kick the floor. Oh, look at the press. Oh, Taylor. Three. He's done. Come on, Brandon. Four. Uh-oh. Oh, shit. Five. Oh, Nelly. Come on. You got it. Yeah, buddy. Four oh shit five Wow Not this week Brandon, don't you fucking break? 12 Taylor. 12 Taylor.

Count them out, Taylor. Not this week, Brandon. Don't you fucking break. You broke my game. Don't break. Don't break. You're going to get the $1,000, Brandon. You're going to get it. Come on.

Ah! Hero. No! Oh, my God. This guy always comes early. This guy always comes early. Holy fuck! Oh my god!

I know exactly what happens in his bedroom. Jesus Christ, she was almost there, Brandon. Knew it. Ugh. It's really sad. Come on, Brandon. Oh yeah, I fell apart. Hey dude, his form looks great.

Holy shit. I can taste my dick in the back of my throat. That's how far I'm sweating. Dang it. Way to still out. You had another one? No, that was it. That was it.

That was it. That was it. I'm happy with this work. Wow. Good job, Brandon. He didn't give himself that one at 16, did he? Maybe he did. Who knows?

Either way. Good job, dude. Yeah, there's a lot. Good job. How does it feel? Oh, he's pissed. Oh, he's pissed. Brandon, you're pissed, huh?

You're pissed. He's pissed. Wow. You're on pace, bro. Wow. You are on pace. He knows. Wow. I hate to say it, but I want to talk to him get him over here he's pissed Hey, we got to put these two Brandon do you always come early?

Hey dudes second week in a row Where you were on pace To fucking get the money And you fucking shit the bed What happened? Why'd you come down? What happened? Grip or engine?

What happened? I had no triceps left Man you could've fooled us You looked incredible Your form was incredible You were killing it Yeah I'm just a bitch Shut up

You're not a bitch Hey What about the row? You came off the row, I want to say, 15 seconds before Taylor. Was that the plan? Yeah, I knew I had to make up time on that for the burpees. His burpees were ridiculous. And then I had a shot of unbroken, but no chest, no triceps.

And that's why we're not going to a semifinal um is this uh man it's crazy were you surprised when you got the link again i can't believe you got in twice um yeah a little bit but you know we'll find a way we'll find a way all right uh hey thanks for coming on you're the man you're savage good job absolutely thank you for having me yep thanks brandon good job oh you're never gonna fucking believe this um what those those jersey dudes did get in let's go holy shit fuck these guys now listen i sent the link to one person before them And then they got the link I can't believe they got it

I mean there's hundreds of links coming in Hey Brandon stay in Oh okay Bye Brandon Brandon stay in touch I want to send you a Kill Taylor shirt If and when we get them made Yeah absolutely Those will be exclusive shirts by the way

Only for people who've competed There won't be anything that anyone can buy. Thank you. All right, dude. You the man. Tell your lady thank you. All right. Thanks.

Later. Keep working. Hey, you know those people who have molds of their penises? Taylor should make one and ship them to people. Oh, my God. This dude looks just like Niall. Do him and Niall go to the same hair salon? I know this guy. You do?

I don't know. He's going to whoop up on you, Taylor. No, he doesn't stand a chance. Are these the Jersey Shore dudes? No. Taylor, dude, be careful. I just signed up for Sentinel. So you got to be on it for at least three months before you have a chance, bro.

Yeah, you're right. He sends you the real programming after three months Jeremiah you got a shot at this? I'm gonna give it my best go I just did a workout like an hour ago With my girlfriend rowing in it But I'm still gonna sell out Okay hold on I'm writing down your excuses I already did a workout

Stefan you always have excuses. Come on. True. Fair enough. Don't drag me into your shit. Thank you. He writes his down too. All right, dude. We're ready when you are. Thanks for doing this. Wait, how tall are you? 5'9". Do you have a huge ass?

Yes. Have you ever had cum on your back? All right. Here we go. Let's your back? No. All right. Here we go. Let's see what that dump truck can do. Oh, shoot. You got one glance at his ass. Hey, if I was holding the camera, turn it the other way. Horizontal.

Hey, everybody watching, stop sending me DMs trying to get on the fucking show. It's not my job. It's Sevan's job, just so everybody knows. Sevan's got control. I sent a link to those douche canoes. Douche canoes. Behind. Hey, everyone has a chick with them.

This guy's got a three minute and 15 second time cap, okay? Hey, Aaron, what's up, dude? We can't even see his rower screen He's going to do probably like 13 calories It's fine He's a known cheater He's going to probably do 13 Is he a known cheater?

No, he's not He's honest Just so you guys know You're watching Jeremiah Clark Do the Kill Taylor Week 2 workout for $1000 Brought to you by VindicateVNDK8.com. 21 calories on the rower, 21 burpee box getovers, 48 inches, 21 bar muscle-ups. In the top left-hand corner, you have Tyson Bajan, quarterback of Chicago Bears.

Below him, Andrew Hiller from Hiller Fit. Below him on his phone, always texting, is Taylor Self. That's the man to beat. He can do what he wants. And then Tyler Watkins from Heat 1-Up. And we're off. Caleb got the clock going. Caleb, is that clock good?

No, the clock's a second behind. Okay. First off is the 21 calories on the rower. Jeremiah just signed up for Sentinel training. Taylor said it'll take at least three months. Let me look at that. Hey, dude, this guy is not a liar. How do you know this guy, Hiller?

Did you guys, like, go to school together or something? How do you know him so well? About five years ago, I dropped into my affiliate to do the Open one year with a buddy of his that was a member of my gym. That's where I met him. Time to beat is three minutes and 12 seconds. He's off at the same time as Brandon Smith

about 15 seconds faster than you burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee

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burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee burpee I didn't know I should ask if he was literate good thing sentinel training has videos not everything's written down oh my goodness hey dude pretty springy though this whole time he could have had a shot at you too yeah look how he just steps right up there that That's athleticism, Taylor. Look at him. That's an athlete. Don't give up. Dude, I wasted no energy on these. When I finished these, I felt like I just started the workout. I'm just telling you, he just steps right up

there, 48 inches. Don't tell me how to be good at the things I'm already good at, bro. Stop. All right. What's he doing with the clock at the moment? Yeah, where's the clock? Why's our clock stopped? Oh, there's a clock over there too. Oh, where's the clock? Why is our clock stopped? There's a clock over there too. Oh, what the fuck, Caleb?

God damn it, Caleb. Caleb just turned red like a tomato. Let's go. That's how Caleb makes it exciting. He stops the clock to give the guy a chance. Oh my God. Let's go, Jeremiah. This whole workout. You might not be able to read, Jeremiah. This whole workout. This whole workout. Fuck.

You might not be able to read, Jeremiah, but we can't operate a clock. Jeremiah, that's one. Two. Fuck. I actually appreciate Caleb for doing that. Can we go to the next guy? Love you, dude. He's good. No, dude.

He's going to destroy you when he does his own work. He's not on pace, Hiller. How do you know? You don't even know what time it is. He when he does he's not on pace hiller how do you know you don't even know what time is because dude is he on pace seven o'clock no no no he's not on pace you can't miss two burpees and he oh no no no he did the old i'm on mdma rubbing my thigh move he's he's toast is that? There we go buddy. He's doing too much of a strict press. He's got to use the knees a little bit. Good thing he's on sentinel training. Do we have any idea

what his time is? 203. What's his time? Where's he at? I said we'd give it to him. Oh shit. Next! Come on Jeremiah. Let's go buddy. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Next. Come on, Jeremiah.

Let's go, buddy. Stop fooling around. People are watching. Only 2,000 people are watching. Hey, dude, imagine thinking of this workout as box jump overs and you're like, oh, my God, burpees. And immediately have to pivot. Holy shit. That happens when you give up.

Oh, man. Lance Needy and Jeremiah is on pace to get done by midnight. See, Hiller, what happened to him is like what happened to me with the clock, but instead of me stopping and restarting, I just fucking basically. Well, you had done like three calories. This dude sent his soul on the road. All right. It looks like we have the Jersey boys.

The Jersey boys lined up yeah hey and they look yoked yeah they're good as fuck i want to send them a dick pic before they start just to get in their head yeah and he's got the the headband on and shit and he's pacing around like a fucking bull hey check this out uh let's go jeremiah come on we don't have all day we gave you a minute and you still haven't finished we did oh yeah oh yeah this guy these guys are cock sure dude you should see him in the back room they're like

they got swagger gone Taylor is saying damn get your hands off your knees Taylor is your ass out yeah oh my god oh my god you won't even believe these Get your hands off your knees. Taylor, is your ass out? I'm taking a picture of his butthole to send him. Oh, my God.

You won't even believe these guys. Jeremiah, get up there. Come on, Jeremiah. Jeremiah, you're lucky these next dudes are good. You're about to ruin the show. God, this reminds me. We should get Daniel Kuss on this show. I just sent him a picture.

I just sent him a picture of my ass. Ow, my abs is cramping. He's fucking 12 years old. Jeremiah, come on. Let's go, buddy. He sent me his number on Instagram. He shouldn't have done that, bro. Let's go.

Let's go. Come on, Jeremiah. Where are you at? You got a number? How many? Holy shit. Hey, at least if they beat me, they get a picture of my butthole. Yeah, fair enough.

That's not a positive, dude. The next guys who are coming up are the last guys. Oh, we don't even have time for these guys. The show's over. Just play them, dude. Let it go. Taylor wants to die. Are you going to be mad at me?

Hey, Jeremiah, you're a good dude. Oh, shit. I'm going to pee. Good work, dude. It's funny. Who is – how close is he? What number is he on? Aaron, what number is he on? Don't put it on him.

What do you have, son? Nice. What do you have good job oh he's down 57 with a 30 second handicap i'm gonna leave this up to uh tyson bajan tyson you got time for one more person to work out usually the show's supposed to be an hour long. You got time? I'm in. I'm in. Thank God. You have time, Tyson? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Was it close?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You were super close. You were close to doubling it. You were close to doubling it. Yeah. That's right.

Hey, dude. What? If you took – did you really think that you were close? No. Not at all. Okay. Good. All right.

Good. All right. I also misread the workout. No. I didn't know there were burpees. So that was cool. Yeah, that was cool. Thank you. You just saved us a thousand bucks. I appreciate it. Yeah, you were on pace, dude.

You were on pace. For the first five cows in the row, I was on pace. All right. Go lick your wombs. Thanks for having you on. Stay in touch. If we get shirts, reach out to me, and we'll send you an exclusive shirt that only participants get. Sounds good. All right. Thanks, Jeremiah. See you soon, Jeremiah. Work.

So, Taylor, do you want to tell us about the tension between these guys before we bring them on? I just sent them a picture of my butt cheeks, so I'm sure there's a lot of tension. I know, but you had some back and forth with these guys on the internet that's been pretty crazy, right? Yeah, they said some girl was like, you're going to have to change the name to Kill Joey

after these guys beat you. And I told her to make sure she packs her diaper cream because when I give these two guys some butt rash with my ding-a-ling, they're going to need it. Okay. And you don't know these guys? No. Alright.

The tension between these guys, here we go. Brace yourself, everyone. Here they are on Will Carter's phone. There's the two fighters. Woo! Let's do it, boys! Jesus Christ.

Of course they're from Tennessee. Look at that. What's going on here? Are you guys Mexican? No. See, see, see. Just culturally appropriated the outfits. Listen, do you guys have a chance?

No, not with that fucking airwave. Taylor chalk breaks. He keeps dropping the ball on his fucking chalk breaks, dude. Tell us how to step it up. Wow, wow. I didn airwave. Taylor chalk breaks. He keeps dropping the ball on his fucking chalk breaks, dude. Tell this guy to step it up. Wow. Wow. I didn't chalk break on this one. Do you guys know the workout has burpees in it?

Yeah, yeah. Our size isn't friendly for that, but. Yeah, we're guarding gnome size, so it's going to be 48 inches of climbing, but we're good. We're confident. How tall is that? And where are you guys? Jersey. Boston, Walwick where and where are you guys jersey

how tall do you have a speech impediment or is that really the name of the gym guardian though wow colton's taller than you guys i'm pretty sure will's a wrestler you're kind of bone you're bone taylor you gotta bend over to give you a standy at semis all right all right we're ready when you are let's do this we're gonna give you a standee at Semmy's, alright? Alright, we're ready when you are Let's do this We're gonna give you the countdown We got a clock on the side, line it up, alright? You gotta wear those when you work out

We gotta watch the clock, we gotta be able to see the clock Alright, hold on, hold on These guys are fucking Chippendales, dude Oh my god I sent them a picture of my ass and they said Let me eat that shit also john clark i'll send anyone that beats taylor's time a special special special special message for my friend martin

what is all right boy here we go the dude in in the headband looks like this dude from Barstool. Will, he used to play in the freaking NFL. Wow, look at these guys are serious. They got their clock set up for us. This is crazy. Oh, shit. Let's go. This is great.

Are these guys really wrestlers? That's a problem. Why are you wearing knee sleeves, Joey? Will Compton. Caleb, let's go. Let's go, Caleb. Caleb Bieber. You see it?

The hairdo. Hey, where's his box? Probably behind the other box. Here we go, boys. Are they jumping over the same box? Hey, scoot that phone a little closer to the camera. boys. Are they jumping over the same box? Hey, scoot that phone a little closer to the camera. Scoot it a little closer to the... Whatever.

I can see it. I can see it. Yell louder, Taylor. I don't think they can hear you. Helen Keller's fucking judging their workout. They're off, guys. They're off. Oh, shit.

Caleb's not on it Who's Helen Keller? Blind lady I got my cloths on it too Wow dude That actually beat me Hey Salon you might be okay Joey P drinking paper streak coffee

Just saying Vindicate will be giving a thousand dollars If these guys can beat Taylor If one of these guys the guy with the best time the time to beat is 3 minutes and 12 seconds it's a better looking version of the buttery bros wow the dude on the right's lats go down to his fucking butt

yeah do you think these guys crawl all over each other's wieners or what yes oh wow done with the row a little aggressive 5 seconds behind Brandon Smith each other's wieners or what? Oh, wow. Done with the row. A little aggressive. Five seconds behind Brandon Smith. Oh, wow. That's

going to be a long day for these midgets. Oh, wow. You know when they said they were short, I didn't really believe them until I saw them jump over the box. That box is four feet high. 48 people which makes these guys about four foot ten hey joey that's one rep you got one two i'm just gonna keep saying the same joke we don't even know where they're at yeah they're both at like 18 i think shut the fuck up. Oh my God.

Hey, Hey, your pecs are huge. Make us don't slow down. You pussy. Damn. Damn. We got winded. We got winded.

Oh, it's not a good time for your tricep to give out homeboy. No. Oh my God. Winds out of the sails. Who invited the Magic Mikes? Somebody put a CO2 canister up his butthole. They need one minute people to do the bar muscle-ups.

If they make it to the bar by 2.12, they are in the game for the thousand bucks. Oh, fuck these guys. No way. They are in the game. They are still in the game. Both gentlemen are still in the game with 12 seconds to spare. Yep, they're on pace They got to get over there soon, though He's saving it for the muscle-ups you got it Wow, let's go saving it for the muscle-ups. You got it. Yeah, shut the fuck up. Wow.

Let's go. Let's go. Here we go. Let's go, boys. Oh, man, and he's a midget, too. I'll count the guy on the right. I'll count the guy on the right, too. I'll count the guy on the right. Just count the guy on the right. You don't know that.

Wow. Six. He might beat me, dude. No. No chance. Eight. Fuck those arms out. Nine. Nine. Ten.

You're fast as fuck. Eleven. No, he doesn't got me. Twelve. Thirteen. Time to beat his 312. Fourteen're safe 15 it's gonna be close boys no it's not 17 get back up there you fucking midget 19 i swear to god speaking of that dude mike Swoosh followed me on Instagram. Is that fucked up?

Speaking of what? Wow. 427. Wow. 327. Very good. Damn, dude. Yeah, a little bit.

Damn. Wow. Go. Let's go. What are you drawing over there? I've been guessing what I think the time's going to be. Have you been close? He's studying plays.

I guess 322. Oh, you're close. Five seconds off. Just by looking at him. Yeah, these guys are brothers. Is that right? No. No way.

That would suck. Suck to have one fitter brother over the other. That would suck. Hey, dude. Close. Is that what you saw, Ezra? Close. Very close.

Very close. Dude, he looks just like Will Compton. Hey, when you got – I'll get to business down below, right? I got you, bro. Hey, you with the headband on, when you got on the bar, you had a chance. Did you know you had a chance? I think I got to, like – I got to rep 10. Starting on the bar, the bar you had a chance did you know you had a chance i think i got to like i got to rep 10 starting on the bar i knew i had a chance but then i got to 10 reps

and i looked and i knew i was gonna make it well good job like three packs of camels before this you smoke cigarettes i was close i was close when i got to 12 reps no dude that's tom Hardy meets Mark Wahlberg. Holy shit, you're right. Yeah. Did you guys, when you guys saw this, I didn't think you guys had a chance of getting in, but you used,

I don't even want to tell the people the technique you used to get your name picked. That was pretty fucking brilliant. They sent some naked shit. Yeah, it was pretty fucking smooth how they did it. Did you guys plan for this last night? Were you guys, okay, let's meet in the gym tomorrow and fucking beat Taylor's ass? He almost didn't get on.

He almost was ready to kill someone. I've never seen him that fucking mad before. Listen, I got to shoot my shot. This was my Super Bowl, all right? I lost this one, but I'm coming back for semifinals, all right? Awesome. Hey, have either of you guys ever been to semifinals? I've been on a team, which I know you don't give a

fuck about. Thank you. But, yeah, this guy's been to semis multiple times. I've gone once a long time ago. And how old are you guys? You guys are way hotter than me, so that's cool. I'm 32 years old. I'm 27. Alright. Hey, you guys were amazing um thank you for doing this

what a what a fucking great show you put on stay in touch and if we get shirts we'd love to give you like an exclusive shirt thank you appreciate that you guys good job guys you guys made the show thank you dude was brady smith the closest again yeah that No, it was his time. No, no, no, no, no. The short dude was. This guy, the guy just now was. Oh. Wow. I gotta breathe.

Brandon had the best shot till he broke. Yeah. That's a good comment from Bryson. He's right. Sounds like the grandma who loves chocolate on SpongeBob. Oh, my God. Savon's got no idea no no idea hey um tyson you think anyone's ever gonna beat him you think it's just like he's just

too good like these are we all he's doing the programming he goes first we only give people 30 minutes you think anyone ever beats him yeah i don't know i think it's i think it's a i think it's just a mindset thing i think uh brandon smith had a chance but he just got all flimsy in the head towards the end couldn't couldn't pull it through but um yeah i don't yeah i don't know especially

uh how you were commenting on uh taylor's burpee uh box jump overs how you're saying he was going slow and then it turns out he was fucking ramping through them like they were candy it'd be tough to beat him uh anyone you think anyone beats him uh tyler uh mr watkins you think there's any chance anyone beats him or we're just gonna be holding on this prize person's gonna get to like ten thousand dollars i think eventually taylor's gonna get wild with the programmies but i'm gonna throw this in and that's where it gets him that might there's a chance of that happening i will say this I don't think any games athletes are going to do it because they're all pussies

they're going to be like I have to do my training today this doesn't fit with my training and they're just not going to do it I wouldn't be surprised if some tried to get in it is really fucking hard to get in how long do you think he goes undefeated it'll get up to about

7,000 at least 5 at least 5 at least 5 at least 5 if you get to cheat your own workouts dude it's gonna be tough Taylor's world class at a couple of things are you gonna start getting cocky

when it's around 10 no why would I get cocky I don't know it's not even my money so I don't really give a fuck But I don't want to be rude Alright, thank you to VindicateVNDK8.com It's where all the cool kids go to get their cool clothes Make sure you go over there

Tyson did the rogue echo challenge I wanted to plug him on that How did that go, Tyson? Worst thing I've ever done I wanted to plug him on that how did that go tyson worst thing i've ever done and i wanted to take you to do that 50 calories um minute 15 suffering wow either uh minute i don't i mean i don't know depends on the air quality bro if it's in uh colorado yeah i got it if it's in north carolina the air is thick here i don't know. Depends on the air quality, bro. If it's in Colorado, yeah, I got it. If it's in North Carolina, the air is thick here. I don't know, dude. How long did you feel like ass for, Tyson, after you did that? Oh, my God. Like, for the first 10 minutes after, I feel like I couldn't open my eyes.

And then after about 30 minutes, I felt somewhat normal again. And you just did it because you saw it on the rogue instagram and you and you entered uh yeah we got done we got done working out and then um and then i'd seen i'd saw the the world record which was like 25 seconds which i don't know why but that's the thing that intrigued me i was like oh i fucking this big sloppy joker can get in 25 seconds. I can at least get in 40. And then come to find out I was wrong. Have you done it, Hiller? No. He asked me if I was going to do it.

I was like, no, I'm not touching that. Because it hurts real bad. Tyler, have you done it? I think I've done it once. And I'm terrible at the bike. So it was nothing. Taylor, what's your time on 50 Cals? Put your phone down, dude.

What are you, fucking a 13-year-old girl? Dude, I'm responding to every person on your post that says they're going to beat me, and I'm telling them to go fuck themselves. I can't help it. 50 for time, I've never done. I've done 40 in a workout, and it was around 44 seconds. It was with Jason, actually. I beat the fuck out of him this workout hey it was 40 cal it was hold on let me say it was 40 cal echo bike 60 chest to bars wait wait 40 cal echo 60 chest to bar 40 cleaning jerks

155 60 box jump overs maybe that that was the workout. Don't remember. Hey, and do people not do it because it's that bad because of the pain? Because didn't Fraser say every morning he woke up and sold his soul to the assault bike? So did Fraser wake up every morning and do that? I bet he tried to make Mal do it too. We know how that worked out. Oh, my God. Dude, I don't know what he said. I mean, dude, doing 50 count for time every day, that's so dumb. I'll do it too. We know how that worked out. Doing 50 cal per time every day.

That's so dumb. I don't think it's like a thing that people don't ever do. I mean, that's a once a year gig. That's a once a year gig. Fuck that. This shit hurts. There were various intervals that he did and it wasn't 50 cal first thing in the morning.

He did that every day. First thing in the, before his beam coffee, whatever he drinks. Oh, Lord. So you need the memory to go away is what you're saying, Tyson, before you do it again. Absolutely. Absolutely. All right. Caleb, thanks for running the clock. Hiller, thanks for being here. Tyson Bajan, thanks for being here. Taylor Self, Kill Taylor, Uniman, Tyler Watkins, thank you. Guys, we will see you guys uh 7 a.m tomorrow morning uh thanks everyone for joining in great show you guys are seeing the beginning of something that is going to

i'll let you fill in the blank thanks for being here for the beginning of this thing because it's about to get crazy