The Sevan Podcast - Official West Coast Classic Semifinal Press Conference

Episode Date: May 28, 2024

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This is an advertisement from BetterHelp. Everyone knows therapy is great for solving problems. But turns out, therapy has some issues of its own. Finding the right therapist, fitting into their schedule, and, of course, the cost. BetterHelp can help solve these problems. It's online, convenient, built around your schedule, and surprisingly affordable, too. Connect with a credentialed therapist by phone, video, or online chat. Visit BetterHelp.com to learn more.
Starting point is 00:00:27 That's BetterHelp.com. Shop deals on electronics, home, and more this Prime Day. you you We're back. Caleb, did you ever think you'd be used as a marketing? No, I got way worse coming. Is he in there? Yeah, he's in there. He said, oh, I'm excited for this one. You should run it. Hi, Caleb. You should run it. Hi, Caleb.
Starting point is 00:02:05 You should run it. Can you hear the other guy? It feels like there's... Hi. A million voices at once. Ooh. Now he's... I don't know. I haven't seen you guys yet.
Starting point is 00:02:28 Yeah, where are we, Sousa? Oh, that's cool. Can Caleb and I both be in that small box? Oh, shit. Look at Sousa. Let's go. We're up in here. Oh, look at that. Welcome to the official press conference. If there's any athletes who know my phone number who would like a link, Oh, look at that. Something happened. I can't hear myself.
Starting point is 00:03:07 Oh, I can. Yeah, I can hear you. Yeah, echo again. There we go. Oh, well. Now no one can hear me, though. Oh, well. Can you guys hear me?
Starting point is 00:03:21 Oh, well. I can hear you. Oh, I can't hear it. I can't hear the guys now. You can't hear us? No. Oh, maybe I can? I can hear you. Oh, I can't hear the guys now. You can't hear us? No. Oh, maybe I can. I can hear you.
Starting point is 00:03:29 Okay, I can hear you. How's the audio, guys? Barry McCockner, how's the audio? Fucked up. You think Taylor's feet are gross? I think his feet are beautiful. All right, fuck you guys. My feet's gone.
Starting point is 00:03:40 No, I like your feet. My feet? My feet are gone, bro. Dude, did you get cancer on your head this weekend? Jesus. No, he's looking at your head. The bald shit up here. Oh, what do you mean?
Starting point is 00:03:52 You can go to some tan lotion on. I'm fine. You grow hair, dude. I know. I just stopped. I shaved it. I see some hair. I want to tell a story.
Starting point is 00:04:01 Can you guys be quiet for a second? Yeah. If you guys buy $100 worth of Paper Street coffee, you'll be entered into a contest to win two free game tickets. I know you know already, and I know you drink coffee. So just go over there. I think you're blocking that camera angle. You're good, though.
Starting point is 00:04:23 Come on. Don't block. Don't. You're good though, come on Come on Dollars you spend You gotta do different orders and you'll get different entries Also You can see JR No, I'm not touching anything That's me
Starting point is 00:04:40 That's not you It's probably something Tyler's doing. Is it echoing still? No, you muted me again. Oh, I don't know who's unmuted. Oh, Caleb. Caleb did it. Caleb, if I start to echo.
Starting point is 00:04:54 Anyway, support Paper Street Coffee. The echo's gone. I'm good. Second thing is today I was on the floor filming the second to final. I think I just finished filming the women's final heat. And I ran off the floor to run to the back to interview the guys before they came out for their final heat. And Dylan Walensky. Walensky?
Starting point is 00:05:18 What? Ma. Walensky. Dylan Walensky, the boss man, I don't know what his official title is, but he's the boss of the semifinals and Guadalupalooza and that shit. He approaches me as I come off the floor. And he says, hey, Dave says you can't be on the floor with the shirt you're wearing. And it was a shirt, little shirt said CEO here and then media big in the back. And I'm like, fuck, I guess Dave's
Starting point is 00:05:51 some Dylan's boss. I don't know who the fuck Dave is. Anyway, so I say, okay, no problem. What can I wear? And he says, can you wear a Northern Spirit shirt? And I'm like, yeah, no problem. I can agree with that. So he's like, hey, I'm going to get you a Northern Spirit shirt. And so I run back.
Starting point is 00:06:07 I film with the boys. And when I come back, Dylan has a Northern Spirit shirt for me, and I put it on. I film. And when I'm driving home, it fucking hits me. It was fucking Dave Castro. Dave Castro was watching the fucking live feed and told Dylan not to let me out on the field
Starting point is 00:06:33 unless I'm wearing the fucking proper attire. I've been out there all week just in my black shirt that says media on it. Douche canoe. Okay, that's it. That's all I got. You could actually just smell you from wherever he was because the same shirt the whole weekend no no no i have like four or five of them vindicate made me a shitload of them can i tell a story now sure go ahead so right after the final event as we know colton didn't make it we love colton and uh we hear rumblings from the stream comment section, the official game stream comment section.
Starting point is 00:07:09 And Mike Halpin's in there and Mike Halpin goes. Oh, the boys on the podcast are really going to love this. As in like, ha ha jokes on you, Colton didn't make it. And I just asked myself when I well first when i read that does he hate colton when i read that i thought what a fucking douchebag does he hate colton though does halvin hate colton second question i asked myself was does he really is he really happy that colton didn't make it yeah or is he that like who cares about us that's evil right or does he hate us so much that he just wants us to be so wrong about?
Starting point is 00:07:46 Maybe just you. You know? Me specifically? Yeah, you're the boy of the podcast. I am the boy of the podcast. What's that mean? Like the new star? The up and coming?
Starting point is 00:07:56 He's our boy. Yeah, he's our boy. Yeah, you're our boy. No, I'm the boy. I'm the one who's easily riled. I'm the one you like to poke a little bit. But does he hate Colton anyway? Does he have a beef with Colton? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:08:05 All I have to say is, bro, comments like that are why you're not in the fucking chat anymore, dude. That's why you're not in the group text. That's why we don't fucking like you. It's shit like that. Seriously? Shut the fuck up. Anyways, God, I'm furious right now. You think
Starting point is 00:08:21 it's mean-spirited? I thought it was completely mean-spirited, dude. And maybe I'm just in a really bad mood because of the result of the weekend. But I don't think – I mean, I think that probably plays a part in it. But, dude, you just – when you lay it on thick like that – You think when you're competing in Knoxville, he's just going to be ass-pounding you in the comments? Right, right. If I have a misstep or if I do poorly, he's going to be like, ha ha, Taylor's going to love this one.
Starting point is 00:08:45 Can't wait for the boys to talk about this on the show. Halpin's going to be in your head all next weekend. You're just going to think about him in the chat. Oh, I'm going to shoot back shots on him. Wow. You should get a tattoo on your chest of him. Not so fun fact. Only one of the top eight athletes had any event wins.
Starting point is 00:09:02 Dude, shut up. That is such a lie of a comment. No, Alpen's comment. That's such a fucking lie, dude. It's a sneaky... Oh, you found a way out of your response on the live stream comment. I have never posted any Danny hate. Yeah, neither have I, dude. I love it. I thought Danny was going to qualify
Starting point is 00:09:18 this whole time, dude. Yeah, man. She should have been saying it all weekend. It's Johnny Young that's been throwing grapes at Danny. Oh, you want to see a It's Johnny Young that's been throwing grapes at Danny. Oh, you want to see it? Oh, yeah. Shit, we didn't send John a link. Fuck. Oh, fuck. Where is John?
Starting point is 00:09:34 Jesus Christ. That's my bad. I'll send him a link now. What should I say? John, where are you? Why are you hiding after all of your hot takes? Start with hey. Where are you? Yeah, start with hey. TV response. Halpin does live rent-free when he's in the comment section,
Starting point is 00:09:51 and that's why I put him in timeout. Otherwise, I don't ever think twice about him. Imagine this. It's the final day. It comes down to the last workout. You're on the rings, and you look up at the Jumbotron, and you see a giant comet from Halpin pulled up on the screen. And it says, God, Taylorlor's gonna really love this when he sees this on the jumbotron then i literally go super saiyan and i fucking obliterate everyone nothing makes me a better competitor than when i'm angry jr can attest to this when i'm fucking pissed off i annihilate
Starting point is 00:10:22 people as long as it's not like a 20-minute workout. Okay, hold on a second. Not so fun. I wasn't pissed off before the second workout, bro. Hold on, hold on. Let me read this. Let me get this out. Clive McLaughlin.
Starting point is 00:10:33 Not so fun fact. Only one of the top eight athletes had any event wins. Sprague. Ninth, tenth, and eleventh had event wins. Colton had two. That's crazy. I don't understand it. Someone explain to me. This is the kind of data
Starting point is 00:10:47 Halpin could never procure. This is some fucking Clive McLallin shit. Halpin could never give a statement. All right, so listen. Out of all the guys that qualified for the games out of North America West 7, you ready? Only eight of those guys. There's eight.
Starting point is 00:11:04 1, 2, 3, 4. What are the There's eight. One, two, three, four. What are the next three, five, six, seven, eight? Yeah. Brandon Luckett. Right. Okay. So those eight gentlemen, only one of them had an event win, and that was James.
Starting point is 00:11:18 All the other event wins came from ninth, tenth, and eleventh place. What are the implications of that, Jer? Is that good programming or indicative of bad programming? I think it's indicative of great programming. For the second week in a row, we've seen two multi-event winners not qualify for the games with Uldis and with Colton. And most of the time, if you have two event wins, even if it's a six-event competition, two event wins, even if it's a six event competition, you'll be,
Starting point is 00:11:50 you'll be able to finish middle of the pack and a couple. And even if you take one or two that aren't so good, you'll still get in. So it really, to me, shows the depth of the field in Europe, both there and in North America West. But it also speaks to the programming that they were able to find shortcomings or holes that the athletes had. Hey, well, I think it's the exact opposite. I don't think that shortcomings or holes that the athletes had. Hey, well, I think it's the exact opposite. I don't think that they found shortcomings that the athletes had. I don't think it covered a wide breadth, enough wide enough breadth.
Starting point is 00:12:12 Well, you know, people like to brush off the fact that me and Taylor usually will say, hey, I think four is okay for quarterfinals, but there should be five. Hey, I think six is okay for how many scored events for semis, but there needs to be seven. The more tests, the better, because that's more opportunity to figure out if some people have some holes that they need to have exposed. I would say the biggest thing missing in this semifinal programming,
Starting point is 00:12:42 at first glance, it looks great. Upon further inspection and after watching a few weeks ago, there really isn't any dense gymnastics that's holding athletes back. Could the final event instead of having bike had 50 strict handstand push-ups for a buy-in? I don't know if that's the fix.
Starting point is 00:12:57 I don't know if that's the fix. There's a lot of machines... That makes Colton be going there. It fixes it for me. Well, right. That's what I mean. It fixes for the purpose. Not for Mike Halpin.
Starting point is 00:13:10 Mike Halpin's happy that Colton lost. Right. For the programming to be balanced, I think there already is a ton of machine work. So maybe they need something a little different in the final. But what they're going for there is you don't need any skill. It's just a sprint all out attack. So maybe you change something somewhere else.
Starting point is 00:13:27 I think probably a better fix is in workout three, you take the echo bike out and put something a little different in there. You have a legless rope climb workout that's serving kind of as a gymnastics bake test. Make it triple G. Make it 10 strict handstand pushup, one legless rope climb, 10 something, 10 box jump over, one legless rope climb. And I think that maybe fixes it.
Starting point is 00:13:47 Tracy Hefner, anyone else see Alex Kazan towering over that tiny Armenian during the Hattie Cano interview? That must have been when I got in trouble with the shirt. I love how this guy thinks. What guy? This fucking guy. I'll talk to Wilson and see what i can do like he has all this leverage to pull dude you have no leverage all you have are cocks in your mouth what does
Starting point is 00:14:10 he think he is freaking who's the dude in uh passed away tom hanks yeah he thinks he's tom hanks justin from lucky uh lucky camera straps i'm sure you guys will get to this but what was colton getting no rep for on his muscle ups i don't think colton got no reps i think he was he did how many yeah yeah he did like two or three for what i i don't know but i could see his judge do the no reps this is my other this is my other takeaway from this oh hi john i didn't see you this is this is my other takeaway from this weekend and it probably was not a good thing for me to see going into next weekend but that is how wildly fucking inconsistent the judging was. On one end of the floor, you have a judge
Starting point is 00:14:48 letting shit go that is so fucking egregious a four-year-old could fucking call it. Lack of hip extension on lunges, atrocious lockout on muscle-ups. On the other end of the floor, you have judges calling squat no reps where athletes' buttholes
Starting point is 00:15:04 are touching the fucking floor jesus hey i liked it that they um i i my what is the no rep there looks like it's pushing back in a way but he's not no rep you did see um about halfway through the set him him just getting a little bit out of rhythm and i don't know if he was trying to cycle the reps faster to make up time, but you could see... His shoulders are over the rings on that rep. Let's see. He's fully extended.
Starting point is 00:15:35 Okay. Shoulders are literally over top of the... Hold on. He's not extension yet. There. That looks good right there right there what the fuck is this dumbass idiot looking at if spiegel gets her reps that's a good rep dude spiegel's let reps were
Starting point is 00:15:54 fucking insane spiegel's reps ride the short bus dude i don't know what to tell you they were so bad what does that mean means they were retarded just check yeah yeah i thought that's what that meant. Okay. Let's pull up the leaderboard and tell you who won.
Starting point is 00:16:12 Holy shit, Abigail Doman. 510 points. I mean, she fucking crushed it. Rather easily, too. Yeah, fourth, a sixth, a fifth, a ninth, a ninth, and a third. Yeah, she's a real deal. I mean, John will probably speak to this and is able to speak to it better
Starting point is 00:16:30 because of the number of events we usually get at the games. But someone this well-rounded, while they might not be able to hit home runs, which is what you need to finish top 10 when there's 12 or 13 events, at a setting like this, anyone who can finish top 10 on all like to me it's just extremely well-rounded obviously and usually will earn a victory not deserves not deserves but earn a win uh she beat alex kazan and ariel lowen is she a and emily rolf is she fitter than them she better cross cross-fitter than them? Do you think she'll finish higher at the games?
Starting point is 00:17:08 John, you take it. I think she can potentially be in the top ten. I think you need to see four. Oh, hell no. I think she could possibly go in the top five. No. Dude, she looks like a stud. She's a freaking monster out there.
Starting point is 00:17:22 You didn't see her. But, look, these fourth, sixth, fifth. Because Spiegel wasn't making the games, dude. And she probably – And she shouldn't have. And she shouldn't have. Fourth, sixth – How the hell can you say that? This is in reference to –
Starting point is 00:17:32 She didn't do one lunge. She didn't do one muscle-up either. She didn't do a single fucking muscle-up. But like these – I'm a sicker at that. For Abby Domer. Her ankle did muscle-ups. And this is –
Starting point is 00:17:44 But this is the thing as an athlete going into next week it's like well fuck i had an athlete competing that i saw got so many squat no reps where her hips are so blatantly below the knee hip crease so far below the knee and that's just something you can't fucking control when she and she moves like a dream emily white particularly moves so well dude like I could not complain anymore as a coach. And I'm super strict on that. I'm stricter than Hiller on my movement, dude.
Starting point is 00:18:09 Like I want my shit to look great and beat the standard. And if you are, and you're still getting called, like I feel like lying either. Like they were good reps. I feel like I have like on the floor at least. And when I'm focused, I can handle adversity and I can keep my emotions in check.
Starting point is 00:18:26 But I'm like nervous. Like, fuck, if that happens to me, you're just fucked. What do you do? You just keep going, but it still fucks you. Actually, we did send Spiegel a link to the press conference. So we're expecting to see her soon. Graciano Rubio. Will, with Leahy and Colton out, everything rests on Taylor's shoulders to represent the podcast thanks graciano graciano we are is my penis taste in your mouth you know that tattoo
Starting point is 00:18:52 that bryson showed us that's graciano and the cock is me we all believe in you buddy thanks bro just sucking on your fucking dome sucking hard on my dome we got we got hatfield too though you know we believe in him, too. No, Hatfield doesn't represent the podcast. I mean, I like him a lot, but damn. You had some pressure. I think Danny, hey, listen. I have zero pressure.
Starting point is 00:19:14 You fucking fuck. Fuck you guys. How much you guys talk about Danny Spiegel, I think she represents the podcast, too. Right, yeah, she does. I'm just going to wear my Trump hat. And you know what? The only pressure I feel, bro, she does. I'm just going to wear my Trump hat. And you know what? The only pressure I feel, bro, is to get my man elected in the fucking November, dude. You're going to wear your Trump hat to Knoxville?
Starting point is 00:19:32 Yeah, I'm wearing it everywhere. My mom's going to probably not watch because of it. You think they're going to let you wear it? What are they going to fucking say to me, dude? Tell me no? I'll stuff that thing into my crotch. I think there's a clause in there that says you can't wear anything inflammatory oh but you can wear a shirt that says girls who
Starting point is 00:19:50 eat and get obese yeah good point what the fuck girls will beat you who eat technically like it's how is it inflammatory it's a presidential candidate yeah fuck them inflammatory this is the thing i've literally supporting who he wants to vote for. That's not, that's nothing. Listen to this. This is crazy. I wore that hat all fucking week in LA, Los Angeles. And the only things I have fucking heard from people, I fucking tell you right now, the only things I've heard from people are, dude, I love the hat. Love the hat. That's all I've heard. And it's got nothing to do do with fucking trump it's got to do with people trying to silence your opinion it's got to do with the fucking vocal minority whining and fucking complaining and shutting other people's opinions down this show just got so political bro hey what if you wore a hat with like a rainbow on it i'll wear a hat with a fucking image of my cock on it
Starting point is 00:20:41 how about that i have one of those oh No, just your nutsack, actually. I will donate $1 for every minute you mute. Who has the air conditioning on? What is wrong with this place? It's like that every show, dude. It's like that every show. Oh my God. Your feet are just out there. Those things look cold. I do need to
Starting point is 00:20:58 stop talking. Is this Colton's dad, Tony Mertens? Where is he? Oh, yeah. Sorry. What do you say? Does Taylor ever stop talking? No. Hey, should we show them that cow question? They'll lose their mind. Holy shit. No, no.
Starting point is 00:21:12 I know. I know. No cow question. Sorry. Why? Abigail Dome. Okay. Is she better than Alex?
Starting point is 00:21:18 Does she finish higher than Alex Kazan and Ariel Lohan at the game? No. Yes. The reason why I say no. The reason why I say no. why i say no let me give you my reasoning these fourth sixth fifth places she is very consistent she's gonna stay consistent the whole way but at a competition where there are more good girls where all the girls from the east and all the good girls from the europe those fourth six fits are 10th 11th 12th and alex
Starting point is 00:21:43 gizan and ariel Lowen's first places are still going to be first places. Hey, John, if you pick up your head out of your butthole for a second and you stop looking at Gazan as this super freak Chandler Smith looking motherfucker, which she does look great, Abigail Domet's an athlete. You want to make a bet on who finishes higher between Gazan
Starting point is 00:22:00 and Domet? Didn't you have a bet on Spiegel? Like 10 bets on Spiegel this weekend that you had 0 up for? I bet Kelsey Kiel would beat her in the snatch ladder. And I won. Okay, dude. Is that the only one? I believe you. I want Gazan.
Starting point is 00:22:13 I want Gazan to do better. I don't know. I don't even know. I just like Alex. I like Alex a lot too, but Domet's a freak. Domet is a freak. But her post-interview was, I don't know, you know? It was a stupid question they asked her. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:22:29 What kind of athlete are you? I don't know. What are you supposed to say? What kind of athlete are you, Taylor? Jay Wade. I don't know, you know? That was for Hattie Canyon. Jay Wade, Taylor, never stop.
Starting point is 00:22:40 I won't, dude. Don't worry. Don't you worry. Okay. Alex Kazan Ariel Loewen fittest woman in America does she beat Abigail Dillman I think that's a much better
Starting point is 00:22:51 yes I do I think she beats her I think Ariel Loewen is the fifth fittest woman in the world oh Jake's in the chat Jake Kazan Alex says fuck off Hiller hey she looks great. Fantastic.
Starting point is 00:23:08 You're saying that Alex Kazan's all show, no go. No, I'm saying Dolmets is an athlete. You're saying that Alex Kazan's like a Ferrari, but when you look under the hood, it's a kit car. Alex Kazan has that I bench too much, can't snatch bar overhead disease. Wow. I can't argue with that.
Starting point is 00:23:22 She does look real stiff. She does not look stiff. She doesn't look stiff. She does not look stiff. She doesn't look stiff. She has a perfectly vertical torso. Pat, I think, do you think that was in Pat's head? Before you get angry and say, fuck off, Hiller, I got the same disease. Can't put arms overhead. Bench too much weight.
Starting point is 00:23:37 What do you bench? I bench the same amount. Jesus, fuck. What do you bench, John? 360. Okay, you don't bench the same amount as Hiller. If we go bench right now, it'll be the same. No, it won't, dude.
Starting point is 00:23:54 He can't bench 385 right now, and I can bench 385 right now. Neither could you. No, dude. If you can bench 360 right now, you've been working on the wrong things right now, brother. No, my bench doesn't leave me. It doesn't leave me. Hattiedie can you 468 tie with ariel lohan but gets the fourth place because she had didn't have a first place finish and ariel lohan did an event number two a third a seventh a fourth and eighth a fifth
Starting point is 00:24:17 and a 23rd at a workout that i think she like i don't think that that showed her fitness like i think she's better than that. I think something went wrong. Eddie? The thing with that last workout is it's not a fitness test. It's a muscular stamina test specifically like the legless rope climb workout was for some females. So it doesn't matter how… Strength and lunge?
Starting point is 00:24:40 Yeah. That's an energy system slash muscular stamina um hole that she has and i think it was really cool after the interview she said i'm gonna be doing a lot of lunging a lot of heavy lunging you know what i mean yeah uh she uh 30 third year i think she proved herself and what happens to an athlete like that who all of a sudden i think what happened to james sprague also happened to her heady yeah i like i think her confidence is soaring but she's like 32 dude is she really yeah what does that mean but i think her confidence is soaring for all of a year and a half what she kind of said was i think like uh i know i belong essentially now right like i was
Starting point is 00:25:19 validated she said that in the interview yeah like along those lines i can't remember the exact word she used but it was more along the lines of like, I know I belong and I can compete here with these people. So she's going to belong for one year? And a half. Year and a half, okay. Yeah. I bet you she makes it to two more games. Yeah. Which would be crazy to make
Starting point is 00:25:38 it at 34. Yeah, JR's retarded. Clock, this statement is referring to... Did said did jr just say muscular stamina is not fitness he meant metabolic he said the workout wasn't as metabolic as it was yeah i think uh fitness is thrown around a lot on this podcast meaning the ability to breathe heavy and maintain a high heart rate i don't throw it around like that that was not this workout workout six was not that at all.
Starting point is 00:26:07 Workout six was not breathy? Emily Rolfe, 450. That was three minutes long. It's three minutes long. Not in this case for her. She just couldn't hold the dumbbells. I know, John. I've done it twice. Is Emily Rolfe now the stop hand check of the female division?
Starting point is 00:26:19 What? No. What? What did you say? She's never been perennial top five at the games. Is she the stop hand check? Yeah. What did you say? She's never been perennial top five at the games. Is she the Scott Pantig? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:30 She's not as good as Scott Pantig. She's more like the modern day Chris Spieler. I would disagree. She's a poor man, Sam Briggs. Whoa. She's a hybrid Spieler Briggs. I can get on with that. She's a poor man.
Starting point is 00:26:45 Or a rich man, Sam Briggs. depending on how you want to look at it. Why would you say rich? I think Savant is better suited to answer that question. I'm asking you. I can't answer that, bro. First of all, I don't think we should compare it to someone that's won the CrossFit Games. I don't care in what era it was. Second of all, I don't think that someone who not only we
Starting point is 00:27:08 would always pick to excel at endurance workouts we would also pick to excel at upper body pulling gymnastics workouts it's not just that she's great on running workouts we would pick her on the endurance stuff we would all also pick her on 30 ring muscle-ups for time or a rig or a sam or you're talking about sam bricks look what emily did in the third workout jr hey could can we talk about this no no no no not yet go ahead jr who would you pick i want to hear who you'd pick she's definitely someone she's now a historical figure she's now like a she's now like a landmark at the game. She's like a feature.
Starting point is 00:27:46 She's a feature. This is her fifth year? She's a feature of the highest level competition. This is her fifth year? It feels like 15th to me. Oh, but it ain't. Okay. Is this her fifth ballpark?
Starting point is 00:27:58 It is me. It's consistently a 10 through 20 girl. John Young, how many years has she qualified for the games? A little four. Okay. In five years, no one will remember her. 2023, 2022, 2021,
Starting point is 00:28:13 2019. That's a great statement, Taylor. In order to be a landmark, you've got to be remembered in five to ten years. This will be her fifth year. She needs... She's right on the precipice, in my opinion, of becoming someone that people remember. And I think she doesn't have to go and smash the games to do this, but she has to, you know.
Starting point is 00:28:34 Six more games. She's got to do something funny or cool in front of the camera for you, at least. She's just got to be a fan favorite. Like, people remember Josh Bridges. People remember Josh Bridges. People remember fucking Cody Anderson. People remember Mel O'Brien. Do you know Danny Spiegel's been to the games four times?
Starting point is 00:28:53 No. Danny Spiegel's been to the games, yeah, four times also. 2019, 2020. I wouldn't really count that. 2021, 2022. So this will be Danny's fifth trip to the game. Yeah, we don't really give a shit. Hey, if you were to take a poll in the CrossFit world and say,
Starting point is 00:29:04 which one do you know in 10 years as Mal O'Brien or Emily Rolfe, it'd be Mal O'Brien. Probably. That's a lot. Mal O'Brien got 10 places higher than Emily Rolfe's best placement ever. That's how you become a landmark, maybe. Is this a real thing? I'm 100% wearing it,
Starting point is 00:29:20 so I'll just drop my Venmo in the chat. Sean Wade, I'm good for $500 if Taylor wears Trump hat in the comp. That's interesting. Everybody's good for $500. Pay up, bitch. How many years has Beth been for? Listen, Danny Spiegel.
Starting point is 00:29:33 I said she'd win the last event, and she did. Good call, dude. She didn't. She didn't. That's sarcastic. Could you tell? Good call, dude. But she is going in sixth place, which is...
Starting point is 00:29:48 This is what Halpin's been waiting for. No one called that. A lot of you guys didn't think she'd make it. What she did is what I thought Kelsey Keel would do. Danny went from... Listen to Danny's finishes. 28th, 10th, 13th in the first two days. Then a 7th, a 3rd, and a 5th.
Starting point is 00:30:06 Is this real? 4 out of 9? Taylor. Taylor. She's going to the games, dude. I know. I don't care. She didn't do a single fucking muscle-up or lunge.
Starting point is 00:30:15 She did do both of those things. I freeze-framed all of her muscle-ups. You did not. Yes, I did. You called them all good. Yes, she did. He did. He did 14 or 15. I sat next to him while he did it. There's more bad ones, I did. You called them all good. Yes, I did. He did. He did. 14 of 15. J.R. saw me do it.
Starting point is 00:30:25 I sat next to him while he did it. She didn't reach any hip extension. There's not anyone else there. That's not true. Sure. No way. You did not see anyone rocking their shoulders back. Weren't you arguing with John earlier about that? No. Oh, I thought you were.
Starting point is 00:30:41 You were agreeing with him. Yeah. Oh, okay. Congratulations, Danny Spiegel. You were agreeing with him. Yeah. Oh, okay. Oh, congratulations, Danny Spiegel. 425 points. Bethany Flores. Fuck that, dude. I'm on Spiegel's bandwagon at this moment. Get off the fucking wagon.
Starting point is 00:30:55 Take a dive. Hey, she liked the post on the Sebon podcast. Yeah, she knows. She's the lone representative of the Sebon podcast. I didn't talk to her once this week check this out if you start taking pictures of your ass and posting them on the seven podcast page like thong pics she'll come on the show oh i gotta tell you hey why didn't you talk to her uh i'll tell you that one second can we cut to a quick commercial 20 second commercial
Starting point is 00:31:21 i gotta tell real something a paper Coffee, the slow pour one. I was interviewing James Fray. It's good. damn that was a good story dude wow that was crazy it is good right holy shit i got all that i'll never know that story i got all that i got all that on video i'll never know it either john you'll know john and it's it's gonna be in the behind the scenes i got it all on video it's good yeah straight up butthole yeah can we pay to hear the story yeah for sure you're gonna see you can pay 20 bucks and be come and watch the behind the scenes the behind the scenes are gonna be insane i got so much great shit wait you guys see what happened to brandon bucket you're
Starting point is 00:32:24 not even gonna fucking believe it okay bethany flores oh so i didn't talk to danny because of this it was totally chill between us the whole time it was not uncomfortable i was standing within six inches i mean i was like like like we're breathing the same air that's how close to where i was all three fucking days and i just didn't want to like fuck with her i didn't want to fuck her shit up at all, but I did want to say something. I at least wanted to say hi to her or like, did you not? No,
Starting point is 00:32:49 I didn't say hi to her. I didn't introduce myself to her, but I mean, I was just very, I try to be very respectful of the fact that she was competing at the highest level this weekend. I think, I think,
Starting point is 00:32:57 and I think I made the right decision, but I, but I was very open to, I wanted to, I wanted to I wanted to engage her love you guys definitely making this CrossFit season more fun kick ass next weekend Taylor thanks bro hey I forgot
Starting point is 00:33:13 you had lice yeah I mean I didn't have it my kids had it so we're good I mean I don't know we're getting out of here it's not even that Bethhany flores 423 dude crazy impressive uh i i looked at her after every workout to see like how she was reacting because i kept waiting for her like to go into some position where i mean especially after the snatch ladder right what did she take in the snatch ladder what event was she was decent on
Starting point is 00:33:41 that yeah 19 better than we thought. Yeah, 19. And I want to say that when the snatch ladder was over, she laid on her back, and then she went over against the wall, and she put her feet up. You know that position? You put your feet up on the wall, and she just laid on her back for like a minute. Lactic acidosis. Okay, so congratulations to her.
Starting point is 00:34:03 Tyra Milgan. Great job. Keeper Sutherland's chick. Sutherland. That whole entire conversation. Mommy. How do you get lice from being homeschooled? Jiu-jitsu. My kids are, yeah, fucking, they fight two hours a day, seven days a week.
Starting point is 00:34:20 I love how you say the F word as much as I do and get no hate for it, but I say the F word and people are like it's too much to listen to. It's a lot different when you follow it with a U every time. Fuck you. And shit in your mouth and you can double fist. Here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:34:37 If you don't want me to do something, tell me to do it more or just keep your mouth shut. If you want me to do something harder, your best bet is telling me not to do it. Does Mike keep your mouth shut if you want me to do something harder your best bet is telling me not to do it does mike alpin really hate colton yeah i think so uh dark lord revon so sad about colton taylor betting uh because you like him because i like him that's why i'm betting on you to crush it so am i so is my mom um jr is, Hiller told me that Taylor is better crossfitter than Colton. Is that true?
Starting point is 00:35:08 Stop. Stop. Shut the fuck up. All of a sudden, it's off limits. Oh, so sensitive. Oh, you are sensitive. I'm going to make Sav on spray tonight. You know how he says that?
Starting point is 00:35:22 Oh, my goodness. JR. What's that hard-ass? Feel the question, buddy. Feel the question. That's disrespectful to someone who's made the games multiple times. Literally three fucking times. All right.
Starting point is 00:35:31 I'm just telling you. How was your knee the past three years? Huh? How was your knee the past three years? Not even capable of doing anything? Right. There you go. Hey, let me ask you this.
Starting point is 00:35:43 Do you think Colton... It might still not be capable of doing anything. Do you think Colton's fitter? It might still not be capable of doing anything. Do you think Colton's fitter? We'll get to this, but I'm going to ask you guys this question. I'm going to ask you the question. Do you think Colton's fitter than some of the guys who went? I'm going to ask you that question when we get to the boys. Hold on.
Starting point is 00:35:54 Kyra Milgan. First time to the games, right? The games. That's an individual. Kyra's been on a team last year with Mayhem. And then I sat next to her the year before So she wasn't competing She was very similar to Brandon Luckett
Starting point is 00:36:10 The entire time Just had good placements Good finishes The entire event Never had a bad event really Even her bad events They weren't that bad And then her didn't really have any home runs either
Starting point is 00:36:24 Just steady throughout the whole course. She's really well in that first run. Kyra 18th, eight, seventh, 18th, sixth and 10th. I did not expect her to do that long run,
Starting point is 00:36:33 but dude, something happened with the run. It was a really rewarding. The people with stubby little legs. Hold on. Let me read this. And then you can, no,
Starting point is 00:36:42 I can't read it. What are you all tripping about over here No no no no no don't pull that Pull it up Hold on Laura Spooner Rooting for you so hard next weekend Taylor I mean the Trump hat will definitely be giving you
Starting point is 00:37:01 The edge I'll send you a topless pic That's cool Oh Colton literally beat Taylor I mean, the Trump hat will definitely be giving you the edge. I'll send you a topless pic. That's cool. Oh, Colton literally beat Taylor in a workout that Taylor picked himself. That's pretty true. Where's the comment that, damn, damn, damn. That's all you, Taylor. I'm literally fucking married, guys.
Starting point is 00:37:23 Would you shut the hell up with this? Taylor timed me out. I thought we didn't need people for speech. I didn't even heckle. I love Colton. Made him a hype video last night. Why is this huge on my phone at the moment? He pulled it up. Where's the clip he doesn't want pulled up?
Starting point is 00:37:36 I literally didn't even ban Mike Halpin, so maybe someone else must have because that's how much of a douche you are. I can't find it. You're lucky. Did you bend helping? I didn't. You told me not to.
Starting point is 00:37:49 I did tell you not to. Hiller told me not to, so I didn't. He's not lying about that. Pull it up, Sousa. Pull it up, Sousa. Let's see. Don't make love to me, Taylor. Ophelia Wong.
Starting point is 00:38:04 What? Don't make love to me Taylor Ophelia Wong what don't make love to me what are you talking about I think that means she wants you to pound don't ejaculate on me and Whole Foods Taylor Jesus Christ is that it yeah that's the first bend over remember you know that's not even
Starting point is 00:38:19 can we meet can we take a commercial break yeah yeah okay we'll be right back why'd you get so excited about that and we're back and that was another good story and that one probably will never be told i don't think that one can be told holy shit oh geez guys holy shit oh jeez guys okay hold on we're almost
Starting point is 00:39:12 we're almost three minutes Olivia Kerstetter hey dude I talked to her she's like grown up I don't know what happened first first interview first interview with her was like a juggernaut dude first interview with her was like a juggernaut dude first interview with her was probably like a 6
Starting point is 00:39:28 the second interview I did with her was probably a 3 I interviewed her like today like 3 times she's a 10 no she's not she's all grown up she's all grown up dude 20th, 18th, 27th, the 1st, the 1st, and the 6th she had her head on straight the whole time
Starting point is 00:39:43 she did what she needed to do she's surrounded by good people. I was – I'm fucking – Did she leave proven? I don't know, but I'm on the stutter train. Comebacks are really, really cool. She didn't qualify. I would say her.
Starting point is 00:39:55 Yeah, she did. She didn't qualify. Ninth doesn't qualify? No, bro. Oh, that sucks. I was just going to say the comeback that she – both she and Tudor made were like – I mean, obviously, they weren't quite enough,
Starting point is 00:40:06 but they were really fun and exciting to go to see if they, maybe we'll bring her on for like when, if Tyler and Pedro ever can't make the show or Hiller, we'll bring her on the panel for kill Taylor. There's no way that she's that good at talking at this point. I saw that first interview with her. She said like 14 words, Kelsey killed 10th.
Starting point is 00:40:23 It's like a Noah Jones. John, let's do a it can either be a eulogy or a pep talk or a... For Kelsey Keel? Yeah, let's do something for Kelsey. What do you got for Kelsey? I thought that 32nd of hers
Starting point is 00:40:37 was going to be more like an 18th. And that would have put her right where Kyra Milligan is. They would have put her in that kind of point spread. What do you mean? You thought that the chick who couldn't walk on her hands at the games last year and cost her team multiple times. It's just a straight line.
Starting point is 00:40:51 She's been working on it, Hiller. What was it last year? It was a straight line. Yeah, but she's been working on it, man. And you've been working on your running for a decade. How is it? That's fair. That's fair.
Starting point is 00:41:03 He says he can run 40 faster than you, Hiller, and a decade. How is it? That's fair. He says he can run a 40 faster than you, Hiller, and a mile. John can? Yeah. He might be able to do a 40. No, he's not doing a 40 faster than anyone in this house. John, you have gotten better at running.
Starting point is 00:41:19 You have gotten better at running, but he's still not anywhere near comparable. I would obliterate you in a 40. Taylor, you have no idea what you're talking about right now, man. better at running, but she's still not anywhere near comparable. I would obliterate you in a 40. Taylor, you have no idea what you're talking about right now, man. I literally played sports my whole life, John. What sports did you play? Same. A 40-yard dash,
Starting point is 00:41:36 I would actually bend you over in a Whole Foods. I would come on you in a Whole Foods, bro. I'm telling you right now, you're speaking without knowing what you're talking about. When you back... I saw John Young run a 4-3-40. When John Young bends over to pick up the potato chips, I'm spilling coffee on his back.
Starting point is 00:41:56 John, are you talking about what workout number he's talking about? Are you talking about workout number two or three? No, he's talking about a 40-yard dash. I'd fucking shoot back. He's talking about event four. Event four, she took 30 seconds. She didn't have any errors, right?
Starting point is 00:42:12 No, she's just slow. Okay. 10-16. That's why I said the freaking running analogy. God dang it, I wanted to talk about that. She's gotten better, but she's just slow. Alright. Yeah, I thought she was faster than that and hey and now i know why you're biased towards her i got to hang out with her all three days
Starting point is 00:42:29 cool as shit charming sweet open just a fucking top-notch woman uh trista smith fuck dude what fuck what she i mean she did so much better than i thought she was gonna do she didn't really do The catch ladder was impressive. I think J.R. said something pretty stout this weekend about Trista Smith and her change from year over year in relation to her coach. Yeah, I mean, I want to say that she – you can correct me if I'm wrong, and I apologize. I mean, no disrespect by this.
Starting point is 00:43:01 But I want to say out of the field of 60 last year, she may be qualified like in the high thirties or 40. And she goes from that to getting into the final heat for the last two workouts. If she would have pushed through and qualified for the games, I looked at Hiller and I was like, Hey, look at Justin right now.
Starting point is 00:43:19 It looks incredible. If Trista punches her ticket is like Adam thought of as the as the best coach in crossfit absolutely dude and she's gonna there was no plan for her to punch it by the way when you talk to them i'm i'm i'm 100 one of those guys it's like hey you shouldn't be you shouldn't be saying coaches are the best coaches based on their athletes performance because then you got bergeron in the world how about his own performances too? Because it's not reasonable to do that. Yeah, so
Starting point is 00:43:50 I mean, I was saying that a little bit like a knee jerk, you know, knee jerk reaction. I've been filming back there for forever and I saw preparation that Adam does with his athletes that I've never seen anyone else do
Starting point is 00:44:05 he can't say something about it it's like duh like what he he they walk before they go out on the floor they they say to him the workout like like they articulate it they speak it and it's like my hands on the fucking car then Then you listen to hear the fucking clock go off. I approach the bike. I jog to the bike. He goes, excuse me. I run to the bike. I jump on the bike.
Starting point is 00:44:31 You know what I mean? And it's like that. And you hear them say, and he's like just fully locked in on them. I mean, they have a fucking script. It's like a, and Hey dude, how many people do it? So many athletes do dumb little fuck ups. Damn. I heard Fraser didn't even go to the semifinals last year.
Starting point is 00:44:45 You hear that? All right. We need to do that. Was he coaching last year? That's a good idea. Hey, he's the shit. Dude,
Starting point is 00:44:51 he's the visualization's huge, dude. Yeah. And not, not only visualization, but she's articulating it. Right. But all she's surrounded by such good people that weightlifting dude,
Starting point is 00:45:00 I forget his name. Jeff Romo. Bufano. Bufano. Jesse, Jesse Buf jesse he's like on her shit like glue and hey she's not in the in crowd either like she didn't get to like she's not chatty kathy she doesn't get to be with the you know the cool chicks yet she hasn't broken that buffer shouldn't hang with them she's kind of in her own in her own world but but listen to these finishes. 21st, 12th, 19th, 3rd, 7th, and 21st.
Starting point is 00:45:28 I think that 7th is the most impressive thing. I read this when I was a kid about this. This is very pertinent. I read this book. I have probably read over 1,000 books in my life. I'm going to tell you if it's pertinent or not. Go ahead. I read this book.
Starting point is 00:45:44 It was an autobiography about this uh it was an autobiography about this delta force um soldier crazy dude and he talks about when he was a little kid he sucked at sports and he's on this baseball team and he never had any chance to play and that kid ahead of him who uh always played ahead of him and started got hurt or sick like super bad before a game he's like eight years old he never'd never started, never fucking hit a ball. And, uh, he's going to play in the next game. And that entire night, he stayed up awake in bed and saw himself like hitting the ball, like 10,000 times. Like he just visualized it, smelled the dirt, smelled the fresh cut grass, like felt the fucking bat in his hands. And then he goes out and he like hits a fucking amazing game. And he
Starting point is 00:46:24 just talks about how that was like a moment for him that he learned how important the act of like visualization is and seeing yourself doing something that you haven't done yet can almost equate to actual repetitions i'm gonna do that to my son because this fucking one chick keeps beating his ass tell him to see him beating the fuck out you guys think sporty beth makes the crossfit games if knifer coaches her i think sporty beth makes the CrossFit games if Knifer coaches her? I think Sporty Beth makes the CrossFit games if she sees herself. Maybe the adaptive games for a mental... No, no, no, John.
Starting point is 00:46:51 Hey, you should read Stranger in a Strange Land. You'd absolutely love it. Christine Forster, the amount these athletes work out, what is Olivia eating? Double what she should be not meaning to be offensive but she has to dial back yeah i agree wow why can't we i just agree i mean she looks
Starting point is 00:47:10 too large for certain things and dominates the snatch later clearly hey she looked good on the hey she did she did the what how much she finished in the rope climb event not as well as she finished on the snatch relatively she can she can just not snatch the rest of her life and still do it. She had a no rep on one of her legless rope climbs and that was really, really costly. Who knows what would have happened if she wouldn't have gotten a no rep. Very fair.
Starting point is 00:47:38 Magnus, what for? Nick, any tier one dude that writes a book about doing tier one shit is full of shit. He was talking about what eight year olds do. Trista Smith, great. Sidney McEllishan, 349, 30th, 15th, 15th, 20th, 4th, and 8th. Gabrielle Spence, great athlete.
Starting point is 00:48:02 Rebecca Fusile, great athlete. Are there any surprises Down here? Devin Kim, 23rd Oh, what happened? Everybody thought she was fucking qualifying No, just Patrick Clark Amy Hosking, I met her today She's cool as shit
Starting point is 00:48:19 Patrick Clark thinks all the kids are going to be on the train They had her third Jamie Higaya, 38 At 39 years old Patrick Clark thinks all the kids will be on the train. They had her third. Jamie Higaya, 38, at 39 years old. 74 points. Hey, do we know if Kaitlin Bernadine has a coach? Yeah, it's a pool boy. Is that really her coach?
Starting point is 00:48:38 No, he just knows everything. Do you know John Young? No, I don't. I think Lauren Khalil said it's HWPO like everyone else this weekend. Oh, Bryson, you were on the Devin Kim train? I was. Hey, okay. You're fired. Guys, we'll be right back to talk about the boys. Lots to talk about over there. ¶¶ ¶¶ Thank you. so uh bernadine's boyfriend, her boyfriend is her coach.
Starting point is 00:50:06 Patrick Rios! Thank you very much, Patrick Rios, for making that video. Thanks for making a great video. Every single evening, Patrick Rios will be getting the behind the scenes to you from Carson very soon. Hi. Hey. Hi, Patrick. And, uh, Patrick and
Starting point is 00:50:21 I and Will Branstetter shot this up. That was the liver king, dude. Patrick Rios put it together just since we started doing the podcast. That's how quickly he turned shit around. Not a single person body shamed anyone, you fucking douche. Oh, is that why? She would be better if she was smaller.
Starting point is 00:50:40 Here's the thing. Here's the thing. How old is she? 18. She's got like fucking 100 years to figure it out. And she went out there and beat the fuck out of girls who are twice her age almost. But we're not saying anything like that. Yeah, I understand that.
Starting point is 00:50:54 And I'm not defending not taking that seriously either. I'm just saying, look, dude. I body shamed the shit out of Medeiros last year, so shut it. That's not body shaming. He's a pro athlete. You're saying if he was lighter and he wasn't fucking fat he would say he would if you say that he needs to lose weight to be a better athlete you want to say it's body shaming then absolutely it's not but that's not body shaming you're just assuming that there's negativity behind it i'm not right well i'm
Starting point is 00:51:16 assuming there's not shaming the shit out of him get better with it well the way miles portrayed body shaming there was negativity miles this douche you're in the comments i never heard of dick butter i body shamed your feet taylor oh dude travis williams i body shaming, there was negativity behind it. This is a doucher in the comments. I never heard of him. Dick Butter, I body shamed your feet, Taylor. Oh, dude. Travis Williams, I body shamed Travis Williams. He's fat as fuck right now. That's all good, bro.
Starting point is 00:51:35 Travis Williams, he's not fat. He is chubby, though, George. He's pre-diabetic, 100%. I think his body looks cool. Who the hell is Miles? I'm the same way, Olivia. If I lost a little weight, I'd be better, too. Yeah, I body shamed John all the time. Taylor, tell me to lose Olivia. If I lost a little weight, I'd be better too. Yeah, I body shame John all the time. Taylor, tell me to lose weight. Hey, you know
Starting point is 00:51:47 what? If there was more body shame, there'd be less fat people on the planet. I saw this post about how in other countries, they don't say, hey, it's okay if you're trans and you're a dude, but you want to have a pussy and you want to go to jail with women and rape them. It's absolutely not okay to be a he-
Starting point is 00:52:03 Hey, it's okay if you want to be obese and place a burden on the healthcare system, but other countries, they don't do that. Put your Trump hat on when you say that. It's wrong. You shouldn't be bad things. You shouldn't be bad things. That was a- Serious question. Taylor's-
Starting point is 00:52:18 Do I need to lose weight so my cannons don't hit me in the face when I learn handstand pushups? Wow. Probably. I don't know. Or just tie them down. Send me a picture and I'll tell you.
Starting point is 00:52:31 Do they fall out of the sports bra? Because I think I've seen that happen. Tape them down. Jeff is right. Shaming is motivational. You ever seen Rocky? Do you think? What is?
Starting point is 00:52:42 Give me an example of body shaming. Like, use me as an example. an example of body shaming. Like, like use me as an example. Uh, I think you body shamed yourself. Your nose looks like you could fuck someone with it. You ugly fuck. Generally they're talking about someone.
Starting point is 00:52:56 I have fucked someone with it. I don't know. Like you, I mean, geez, she's an athlete. She's a professional athlete. We're not being, and no one's saying a bad thing. It's just, I think it know. Like, I mean, geez, she's an athlete. She's a professional athlete. We're not being,
Starting point is 00:53:06 and no one's saying a bad thing. It's just, I think it'd be like, your wife is asking if this dress makes you look fat without asking. You just go, that dress makes you look fat. That's body shaming. But my wife would want me to say,
Starting point is 00:53:18 Oh, thanks. I didn't want to wear that dress. Maybe the nuances there is if you're not married to Olivia, you can't say it. So Alexis will always tell me, it's like, you got something in your teeth. And there used to be a point where i was like
Starting point is 00:53:26 oh fuck but now i'm like oh thanks who's that fucking young kid that other player who came in who was super heavy he was like a forward i'm talking about what about what about how what about how we say colton's too short for stuff is that body shaming right no yes no we're not body no it's the same fucking thing as these people are saying about when we talk about Olivia, right? That's what they're claiming. What we're saying about Olivia.
Starting point is 00:53:50 But here's the deal. Let's be, just be frank. What they're saying is this, what they're really saying is this, and they're not just there. Maybe there's not enough room to write it out. What they're saying is,
Starting point is 00:53:58 is like, Hey, this is an 18 year old girl. And at 18, weight is a sensitive issue. And so for you guys to sit around on your couch where you get high on c4 it might not be appropriate to talk about it and then our rebuttal is is okay we hear you but it's on crossfit and it's on the highest stage and we all respect her
Starting point is 00:54:15 and it's not like no one's like we're not saying no one's saying in a disparaging way we're saying from it to cut seconds off for time right yeah so that's that's the truth about that conversation that no one's wrong but it's also like it's really just all it's just people are feeling rightfully defensive it's probably especially people with daughters that hey she's an 18 year old girl and like it shouldn't be and it's got nothing to do with how she looks right all we're talking about to tell you the truth i read the comment out loud before I read the comment. And if I would have read the comment before I read the comment out loud, I wouldn't have read it.
Starting point is 00:54:51 But I also completely see your point. It's like there's no one here who thinks Olivia Kirsten is not one of the fittest human beings in the world. One of the most impressive. Maybe the most impressive teenage athlete that's ever come out of the CrossFit Games you guys ever heard me talk to John Young about his diet yeah but he's a man right but I'm not saying that shit to Olivia and he can say it
Starting point is 00:55:13 which is also sexist okay let's move on Kelsey Keel, Trista Smith super impressive, Sydney McElishan, Gabrielle Spence impressive, Rebecca Fusile I don't see anyone. Okay, so let's move on to the boys. Man, it is so, after watching the women go, it's...
Starting point is 00:55:31 It's kind of like the CrossFit Games to me. Dude, there are so many good athletes that didn't make it. Like what? That's crazy. Rebecca, Kelsey Keel, fucking Olivia Kerstetter. So many women who are so... Gabriella. Fit did not make it. Yeah,lla. People say this is the
Starting point is 00:55:47 week one of the two semifinals here in North America. Boy, am I scared. You should be. Yeah, you totally should be. I don't believe it's the week one. Okay, do you think that they're going to have people there too?
Starting point is 00:56:00 They're going to have their Hattie Can you in the East? There's got to be a Hattie Can you. YOLO FOLO. too they're gonna have their hattie can you uh in the east there's gotta be a hattie can you oh yeah are you the hattie can you i hope so holy we have our own head well people know taylor self though yeah but he's still i'm not the bill fucking I knew that would light you up. I've had my fucking injury, bro. Okay. Justin Medeiros.
Starting point is 00:56:31 Hey, Justin Medeiros. You guys, Justin Medeiros, champ shit. That's CrossFit Games champion Justin Medeiros. We saw him. 7th, 3rd, 3rd, 8th, 5th, 2nd. Came behind from out of nowhere kind of to win it. Guys, I've been telling you all along that Justin's going to win this year. Liar.
Starting point is 00:56:50 Brent Fikowski, out of nowhere kind of. Yeah, awesome. I mean, I think a lot of people picked him to win. I'm not saying that people didn't pick him to win. I'm just saying it didn't look like it was his show, and then James and Pat Valner fell into line. Dude, James Sprague was one of the most impressive people I saw this weekend. First, 13th, first, fifth, fourth,teenth, third.
Starting point is 00:57:14 What was that second or last time you said teeth? Fourteenth, third. You just said teeth. And what's crazy. What impressed you about James? For him to podium where Valner, Fikowski, and Medeiros are all in the same region, and he podiumed, he beat Pat. And I know Pat kind of had a terrible snatch event, but it was just impressive.
Starting point is 00:57:35 He wasn't bad anywhere. Where we thought he would be bad, you know, the snatch ladder, he did 818, which is great. I think he thought he was going to struggle to finish the snatch ladder go ahead after he finished i think it was the fifth event it might have been the sixth he was doing the worm on the field and all i could think about was how noah yes that's all i could think about too i was like oh no who was doing the worm james james sprague did the one out there maybe it was after the final call maybe he has a smaller dick than noah maybe you know he definitely has a smaller dick than Noah. Maybe. He definitely has a smaller dick than Noah.
Starting point is 00:58:06 Noah's got a hog. Like 10 more guys capped in the West than Europe in the snatch ladder. Isn't that crazy? Here? 10 more capped here? Yeah. Than Europe? Europe was way better in the
Starting point is 00:58:22 snatch ladder than the West. They're stronger than America. Way better. Andrew Wells. Hey, what's up, buddy? Good to see you. Okay. A question for you now, JR.
Starting point is 00:58:32 Taylor, you ready for this one? James Ray got lost. I know he's getting older. I know we're going to see big improvements. I know his fucking T count is climbing. His fucking balls develop more and more spermazota. But he lost five pounds. Is that what Hopper needs to do too?
Starting point is 00:58:50 I think Hopper's already done it. Hopper loses five pounds, and we see another James Sprague-type performance in the East. Jason's already considerably leaner and just weighs less in general than he did last season. Obviously, I think the bigger you are, it gets to a point where some movements become a lot more difficult. While it is a big man's sport in a lot of ways,
Starting point is 00:59:16 especially I would say at the semifinal level, at the games level, being able to get out and run, being able to swim, being able to do things like bike that kind of beats up your body the bigger you are. He's already done that. I'm really excited for everyone to watch him next week. I've just seen one of the most
Starting point is 00:59:35 retarded comments I've ever seen. Andrew Hiller. I don't think James... Hopper can get any leaner he was 5% yeah but he just needs to he needs to fucking shave some muscle mass killer uh 0% chance
Starting point is 00:59:52 uh James Spragues is on steroids 0% chance lost 5 pounds and got better I mean that's usually the kind of thing we see some guy put on 10 pounds right that's pretty crazy yeah well you know we didn't get a lot of is dense gymnastics that's usually the kind of thing we see some guy put on 10 pounds, right? That's pretty crazy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:08 Well, you know, we didn't get a lot of his dense gymnastics. That's true. Patrick Vellner, fourth place. Most angry I've ever seen him after the snatch ladder. He was pissed. Well, he should have been. He sucked. He didn't have as good of a weekend, I think, anybody predicted.
Starting point is 01:00:24 This guy, Matt Dennisis west men are strong east women are strong apart from the top five east men might as well be in south america let's count this out real quick dude that is so yeah yeah ben smith luke parker uh alex allen pepper jason hopper right seth stovall. Spencer Panchik. Jack Rosema. Sam Correa. Austin Hatfield. Jeff Adler.
Starting point is 01:00:49 Jack Farlow. Alex Vigneault. Oh, you're fucked, dude. You're fucked. Max and Panchik. You're fucked. I am fucked, dude. Me, dude.
Starting point is 01:00:56 I have a 295 snatch. Travis Mayer. Jorge Fernandez. Holy shit. You forgot Motherfucker Jones, dude. Holy shit. Those are strong fuckers. You're fucking retarded, Matt Dennis. Sorry.
Starting point is 01:01:06 That's all I had to get off of. The Eastman is the most stacked region in all of the regions. Jesus fucking Christ. Wow. Patrick Vellner, there he is. Very frustrated. I don't think he did.
Starting point is 01:01:20 A fourth, a second, a second, a tenth, a twenty-second, and a fourth. A fourth, a second, a second, a tenth, a twenty-second, and a fourth. Is James Sprague fitter than Pat Villeneuve now? No. Yeah, he is. Samuel Aquant, 477.
Starting point is 01:01:40 Did what he had to do. Looked good. Chris Ibarra. Who the fuck is this? Wait, wait, wait, JR. Ibarra. Ibarra. I good okay chris ibarra who the fuck is this wait wait jr ibarra ibarra ibarra ibarra chris ibarra winner of the monster games yeah i i got maybe like a year ago his coach was at my gym and was kind of telling me about this guy he was coaching that was pretty up and coming had a sports background was really athletic but needed to work on absolute strength. The one-rep max stuff was probably his worst thing, but he's really, really, really good, skilled,
Starting point is 01:02:13 and that he thought with another year or so, he was going to break through. He was going to come to Crucible last year, decided to compete, I think, at Monster Games instead. Terrible decision. Terrible decision. Yeah, I mean, maybe it was a great decision because look what happened to him, just qualified for the games. Yeah, crazy., maybe it was a great decision because look what happened to him. Just qualified for the games. Yeah, crazy.
Starting point is 01:02:27 Sixth place. Really, really consistent and if there's a hole there, I mean, it's not something that's generally tested in quarters or semis. Hey, do you think there's a bigger attendance next week in Knoxville? Yes. Really? I mean, wherever Tia goes, I want to say that people are going to
Starting point is 01:02:43 show up. What do you think, Sonia? I wonder how many pairs of GORUCK she sold. Oh, it was Memorial Day weekend. Ibar went to the semifinals. This is only his second semifinals. He went last year. He's never been to the games. This is only my second semifinals, dude.
Starting point is 01:03:03 Yeah, wow. Okay. I mean, I did Granite Games before it was a semifinal 2018 oh two i beat your ass there did you no just don't want to work out i was 10th dude uh brandon brandon luckett oh you guys are gonna get some great behind the scenes shit from brandon luckett sweet going to the snatch ladder brand lucky could barely walk when he was in the warm-up area, he couldn't reach full extension. He was hobbling. When they saw him enter the stadium for that event,
Starting point is 01:03:32 he was limping down the stairs as he entered the stadium. And he finished under seven minutes. Yeah, and he finished in 6.54, 6.66. And at the finish line, I greeted him. I'm like, what's up? He's like, i don't know i'm on you stand them all up he goes yeah you know what what happened he goes i just once they said go it was his back dude his back is so fucked really dude like what do you mean it was a muscle
Starting point is 01:03:58 spasm or what i said it's happened history of this it's why he doesn't lift very heavy like in training he doesn't lift very heavy because Like in training, he doesn't lift very heavy because he kind of has a Bethany Flores situation going on. Not near as bad, I don't think, but same stuff. No, he says it takes two days to go away. I said, are you going to be able to get out of bed tomorrow morning? He goes, it's going to be hard. Good for him. I saw his wife today.
Starting point is 01:04:21 They've been dating since high school. Ludicrous. Yeah. Well, I'll say that he's hot she's ethnic looking i respect the fuck out of him going back out on the floor that's savage and i was like hey dude what about pulling out and he's like not not an option dude he made the games not an option i asked his coach i mean it was it was heart-wrenching back there was his coach keeper it was hard and uh and uh um uh no, I don't know his coach's name.
Starting point is 01:04:46 Big Jack, dude. Good-looking dude. Looks like he, like, you know, looks like he should be on TV. I heard the liver king was here. No. Was it him? No. The underdogs guy, Justin Kotler, fucking, I didn't hear what it was,
Starting point is 01:04:59 but I got the camera in there. It'll be in the behind the scenes. He walked over to Luckett before the snatch ladder and gave him a fucking pretty, I think, gnarly pep talk like basically hey fucked hard get out there and fucking give it your all and die out there and then i asked his coach i go what about pulling him out and he said same thing he goes no option he goes this dude would rather fucking like go down and be carried off on a stretcher tackett says his dad is his coach Oh that's his dad Huge guy
Starting point is 01:05:26 Yeah that's Luckett's dad Holy shit his dad's jack His dad looks like a movie star Cole Grayshaber No sorry sorry Cole Sager Wait a minute no no no Cole Grayshaber No Cole Sager
Starting point is 01:05:41 Cole Sager took 8, please saber Cole Sager took eight Unfortunately, but he retired a 9th of 4th of 6th of 12th of 24th and a 7th Fucking wild he waited to the last minute like they are you got your answer? Somebody who didn't finish the ladder is gonna go to the games There you go, he can't Oh, shit. There you go. He can't even snatch 265. It shows you how fit he is. That shows you that it wasn't a real strength.
Starting point is 01:06:11 How weak the West is. Cole Gray-Shaber looking amazing. I'm moving to California. Much better than last year. Janelle Winston, I'm so annoyed Cole got in again. Cole Gray-Shaber, 11th, 18th, 9th, the 1st, the 3rd, and 23rd. Wow, he fucking shit the bed in the last workout. He looks absolutely fabulous compared to last year.
Starting point is 01:06:35 He's got great coaches around him. He had Jake Marconi and another HWPO coach, Josh Everett. Yeah, we don't remember his name because he's a nobody. He looks like he could be related to me. He looks Armenian. Colton would have performed better at the games than Cole will. Mike, cool boy. I agree, and unfortunately, though,
Starting point is 01:06:59 I think everybody's taking their angst and emotions out on Cole. On who? On Cole Sager? Yeah, yeah. It's up to Colton to uh emotions out on cole it's got another on who on cole sager yeah yeah it's up to colton to qualify it's not cole's fault i love and i love colton but like he wouldn't he wouldn't want colton would be the last person who would want us to sit here and be like no i don't want to see colt somebody has to oh but you don't want to see him because he's the one who edged Colton out. If Cole was in six and gray Shaver was out, I wouldn't give a fuck.
Starting point is 01:07:32 I wouldn't give a fuck. If Cole was in it, no fuck off. He is not Spiegel territory. John Young. Take that fucking back. For me, for me,
Starting point is 01:07:41 he's Spiegel territory. I agree. I agree with you, Taylor. If Colton was in, no one would have any issues with Sager. Right, exactly. Except for John. I don't understand what John's saying.
Starting point is 01:07:52 He's saying he doesn't want Cole, Sager, back at the games. He's done with Cole. Yeah, I'm just tired of seeing Cole at the games. I mean, me too, but I can't compute the Spiegel comparison. I don't want... I don't want... I'm rooting against spiegel to make the game she made it she earned it she's fit enough she did it but i don't want her i don't i'm not rooting i'm rooting against it same why why would you root again against a brother in
Starting point is 01:08:18 christ john young that's a good point fake oh my god he's not fake i think he's fake. Oh, my God. He's not fake. I think he's a Bergeron athlete. Okay. Like when Colton, you know, just gets his heart broke a little bit. And then Cole Sager goes and tries to hug him and talk to him in his ear. I'm literally like, it hurts me. Go away. Go away. Oh, you're talking about after the work?
Starting point is 01:08:41 After last place guy like he always does. I hate it. I hate it. You're talking about after Colton lost, place guy. Like he always does. I hate it. I hate it. You're talking about after Colton lost, Cole came over and gave him a pep talk and you're like, who the fuck are you to talk to our boy? Colton. You just beat him.
Starting point is 01:08:53 Let him lick his wounds. Let him go home. Like you just beat him. He don't want to hear from you. That's how I think you're right. I think John. Holy shit. Hey, Mike Halpin.
Starting point is 01:09:04 We get, you always have to be right, bro. Just shut the fuck up. I can't not swear at this guy. You're such a douche, dude. You're such a douche. What'd he say? What'd he say? He hates Colton.
Starting point is 01:09:16 Colton picked Cole not to make the games on CPW five days ago. This right here. This right here. I hate it. Where do you think you're going? JR's got to go, dude. For John versus Taylor, 40-yard dash. Tyler, you're in. Oh, dude.
Starting point is 01:09:35 I would fucking slap Young around. Every workout John Young suggests that we go against each other, I just shoot back shots on him. He literally bends over in the Whole Foods and I come on each other. That's not a workout. I shoot back shots on him. That's a five-second. That's a four-second. He literally bends over in the Whole Foods, and I come on his back. That's what happens to John Young every time.
Starting point is 01:09:50 I'm not going to let Taylor ever get in. Well, you don't do the workouts that I can beat you at. You're too scared to do them. Taylor, let's hear what the man did. Did you shower? God damn it. What? Okay.
Starting point is 01:10:04 It's not Cole as a person. Like, Danny, it's as a person. I like danny it's as a person i don't like but cole i just i just don't i just i hate that stuff and he does it every single event i love everything there is about danny except uh and except for the fact that she was offended that i said her shirt was too small i and i do and i i was even took it as a compliment when she said I look like I'm homeless you did what's more accurate that her shirt's too small or I looked homeless what do you think has more can we get a poll you don't look nearly as homeless as you've looked
Starting point is 01:10:37 what do you mean Cole is a fake can we get a poll Caleb what's a more accurate statement that I looked homeless with the way I used to look or Danny's shirt is too small? No, I stink. He doesn't want me to. I want to see what the – You do look tan. Thank you, Caleb.
Starting point is 01:10:54 Wait. I was reading a comment. I'm confused. I'm reading things like – Can we go back to how amazing is it Cole Sager got in on the last – Can we just acknowledge that? No, I'd rather not acknowledge Cole Sager. Dude, why are people saying that he's fake nice,
Starting point is 01:11:10 and did he do something to Colton or something? No, just the talk afterwards. There's someone behind this. Let's go past that. Let's go past that. Fraser said there's fake people, and everyone somehow linked it to Sager. Listen. I just think he's a virgin athlete.
Starting point is 01:11:23 And I don't know him. I don't know him. I don't know for a fact that he's and i don't know him i don't know him like like i don't know for fact that he's fake i just hate that stuff at the end of workouts what did he do when he tries to root on the last place person or pep talk colton whenever he just beat him like and he does it did he try to pep talk colton that in the last workout yes afterwards c After he beat him. Caleb pulled up the video. Like 30 second pep talk. Like, bro, you did great. Love you, man.
Starting point is 01:11:49 This is amazing. I'm just so proud of you for all the work you've done. And he's like, He said that? No, I'm just talking. But it looks like that. It looks like that. Taylor, look at me for a second.
Starting point is 01:12:00 After the workout was over and they announced the winners and Colton didn't make it in, Cole came over to him and like, and clearly Colton didn't make it in, Cole came over to him. Clearly, Colton didn't want to talk to anyone. Cole came over to him and put the love on him. God. What John is saying, that's not what Colton wanted.
Starting point is 01:12:15 He doesn't want to be touched. He doesn't want to... Colton probably said, hey, you're going to have your day. You got a long career ahead of you, something like that. That is a fucking... All right, I fucking hate but maybe he also whispered in his ear. Hey, dude, you're too fucking
Starting point is 01:12:30 short. Go home. I wish you would have salmoned him. I have Colton would have him with a salmon. That would have been great. It's just a big fish slap. No, no, no. Where he like goes between his legs and he does one of these. Oh, you know, yeah. Okay. Cole Gray Shaver. We're happy. Oh, he did. They take nine. They did. Okay. Cole Gray-Saber. We're happy. Oh, did they take nine?
Starting point is 01:12:45 They did take nine. Is Gray-Saber going to beat Cole Sager at the games? Absolutely. Is he going to beat Gray-Saber? No. Guys, you guys are all wrong, and I'm right. That's fine. Did Gray-Saber finish last year, Hiller?
Starting point is 01:12:59 No. He finished better than everyone that we were going to talk about next. I think with four more events, Cole— Hey, Gray-Saber's going to have a win Hey, Gray Shaber's going to have a win. Gray Shaber's going to have a win at the games. Can we agree with that? He's going to have a first at the games. No, he's not.
Starting point is 01:13:11 Yeah, whatever the hands down. Hey, that handstand walk event, he's got a shot. No way. Not if it's obstacles. He won inverted medley. He won the obstacles last year. Cole Gray Shaber did not win inverted medley. Gray Shaber.
Starting point is 01:13:24 Justin Medeiros won inverted medley. Gray-Shaber. Justin Medeiros won inverted medley. No, he didn't. Last year at the games? I will bet you something. I don't think Justin's ever won an event at the games, has he? Jeremy, Cole is the guy that tries to cheer you up after he steals your girlfriend. Exactly.
Starting point is 01:13:40 Don't worry. You were so close, buddy. Don't worry. I'm still giving her the dick. I'll let her say your name. I don't know why you try to argue with me on this stuff, Taylor. Who still giving her the dick. I'll let her say your name. I don't know why you're trying to argue with me on this stuff, Taylor. Who's giving who the dick? Cole Sager, after he steals Lizzie from you.
Starting point is 01:13:53 It says Justin Madaris first place. Whoa. Don't worry about it. I didn't hear what he said. That's good. That's positive. Yeah, it's good. Am I going to want to fucking kill somebody? No, you're going to want to hug it. What the fuck, dude?
Starting point is 01:14:07 Listen back to it. Time code stamped at 1-1-13. Clip that, Caleb. Tudor Magda, a 30-second, a 7th, a 19th, a 4th, a 6th, and a 1st. We kind of knew he was going to win the last workout. Who? Tudor. This guy needs a good coach. Who? Tudor.
Starting point is 01:14:26 This guy needs a good coach. Who, Tudor? Yeah. I think he's got like four good coaches. Four? Yeah. He won, buddy. Would you coach Tudor? No.
Starting point is 01:14:36 Why? Because I only coach athletes that have some emotional damage and maturity as a result of that damage. To be emotional. Wow. Damage. Okay, Colton Mertens. Two huge things today for Colton. emotional damage, damage and maturity as a result of that. To be emotional. Wow. Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 01:14:46 Colton Mertens, uh, two huge things today for Colton touching, touching, go touch and go on the snatch to step ahead of Fikowski. That was cool. Uh, you're going to see a great interview post interview after that, after he did that,
Starting point is 01:14:58 uh, I asked him why he did that. You'll get all that shit. Uh, I asked him when he made the decision. He said it was fucking like literally spur of the moment. He said actually when he snatched it, he wasn't even committed to it. He was definitely thinking
Starting point is 01:15:09 through it. Here we go. From the barbell spin. Thank you, Caleb. Touch and go. I need to see Justin Medeiros right now. Medeiros hits one at 245. He has one left, but we need... Who's this almost sexual commentating with you?
Starting point is 01:15:24 One at 265. Colden hands on? Ben smashes one at 265. Colton hands on the bar, two reps at 265. Bar's up. Beautiful. Like, stand it up easy. No! No! Oh, my God!
Starting point is 01:15:34 The only athlete worldwide to touch it. Wow. Can you mute that and play it again? Is there a 12-year-old? John, were you commentating with a 12-year-old? Did you meet that guy in the halo xbox travis travis his voice doesn't sound that high in regular life john's playing call of duty he's like hey you want to go commentate across hey i thought you weren't allowed to touch one side
Starting point is 01:15:59 of the plates and then the other like that i thought that was an unfair advantage it is no it's not that didn't give him any advantage on the snatch. Dude, he lowered that onto his thighs. That was the ugliest touch and go of all time. Of all time. But it was so cool that he pulled it off. You don't see snatches that bad in affiliates, dude.
Starting point is 01:16:18 It's crazy. But what did he do? But what did he do? But what did he do? He kept the bar close to his body. Dude. Amazing execution on that. Tristan Harrison. It was 12th place.
Starting point is 01:16:32 John Wood. 13th place. Gave me. I screamed as hard as you did. Gave me chills. Drake Lewis. 14th. It's not Trayvon.
Starting point is 01:16:39 It's Traven. Probably the best moment of semifinals. You know what? Give me chills. Maximilian Krieg. Jacob Schmidt. Daniel Kust. Good chills. It gives me chills when Graciano Rubio thinks about me at night when he's got his wing out of his hand.
Starting point is 01:16:51 Quiet, quiet. Sam Dancer, 19th. Scott Tetlow, 20th. Jacob Marlowe, 21st. Did we skip to 29th? Nick Roberts, 25th. 29th, Will Leahy. What's his status on Will Leahy?
Starting point is 01:17:03 Have you talked to Bill William today? He is going home, getting some imaging done. And is he in a wheelchair? No, he's got a... A walker. Did you see the video I made? They made him a little splint on a cardboard. It was crazy looking. That's cool.
Starting point is 01:17:18 So he's got to hobble onto a plane? He's hobbled. He's back. What do you mean he's back? Oh, he's home. He's not going to be back next year. He's going to have to have surgery and a whole rehab well it depends on what they say how his his acute he can either do bpc and it can heal like this in a minute yeah thank you he can go to ca peptides.com and it can heal like this and it can't be tested for or he cannot do ca peptides and it can heal like there's the crazy thing about it like there's been no image done and there's been like all these murmurs about what's going on with it but murmurs like no one has said anything nor has he had a picture done
Starting point is 01:17:54 and the assumption is he's got the achilles tear he felt like he got kicked in the back of the leg which is 100 conclusive it's 100 conclusive it's more conclusive than even's 100% conclusive. It's more conclusive than anything a doctor's going to tell you. Typically, if you have an Achilles tear, you see that fucker curl up in the back of the leg. The crazy thing is he did like five or six more box jumps after he felt that sensation.
Starting point is 01:18:16 Can you guys shut the fuck up for four seconds? Is that what you said to Brian Friend today? I'm sitting there for 10 minutes trying to wait for them to announce the final announcement. He goes, hey, dude, look what I got. I look at the spreadsheet, all these numbers. I go, is this the leaderboard? What is wrong with you? I don't want to see that. I'm waiting anxiously
Starting point is 01:18:36 to see it. Don't ruin this for me. He was going to show you who the winner is as the announcement was going. I'm like, what the fuck, dude? That's premature ejaculation. Now you know what it's like to be a chick. That would be way better. That would be way better. Someone stealing your orgasm from you.
Starting point is 01:18:53 Okay. He didn't know what to do. Wad zombie. 2014 bridges have qualified in this field. No. Wait, so go back to Leahy. Oh, yeah. How bad of a...
Starting point is 01:19:06 It's probably a partial tear. Yeah, well, the only thing... He was jumping on the box, and that's just something that he's like, well, everyone in the doctor said maybe it's that, but he hasn't had the image done. He could jump. So how can you jump with a ruptured Achilles? Right. So I think he's probably a partial
Starting point is 01:19:26 player. I hope he has like a... He jumped with one leg. Or he jumped with one leg. Dude, he can't plantar flex his fucking foot. He can't... Okay, Caleb. Is it dangling like this? Like that guy's dick I saw
Starting point is 01:19:40 in the bathroom? He was able to move his foot around. He was? Huh, Hiller? Yeah, he was sitting in his bed and he was able to move his foot back. He was? Huh, Hiller? Yeah, he was sitting in his bed and he was able to move his foot back and forth. Okay, Caleb, there you go. Take it back. Fucking take it back. Let me see the imaging.
Starting point is 01:19:55 Yeah, send a video of it. I want to see the video right now of his foot moving. So, Caleb, he can partially tear his Achilles, right? Right. All right, so that's probably what it is. He felt the sensation of an Achilles tear. He was still doing box jumps. He could still move his foot, but it's still fucked up.
Starting point is 01:20:11 So maybe a partial tear. 100% conclusive to me. We're right. Cool. Dr. Self. Dr. Self has spoken. So it wasn't a rupture. It was a.
Starting point is 01:20:22 It was a. Because we studied that yesterday. Rupture means it's a full tear. Was labia ruptured. But that's a whole different. OK, the coolest guy, the coolest person I met all weekend. Was me goes to thirty ninth place. Tucker the fucker.
Starting point is 01:20:35 Oh, my God. I started hanging out with that dude. That dude's cool as shit. I blew him off on accident and I felt terrible about him off. I was walking back near the athlete area. I had wandered back there. I didn't know where I was. I was him off on accident and I felt terrible about it. How'd you blow him off? I was walking back near the athlete area. I had wandered back there. I didn't know where I was. I was talking to my wife and I was talking loud because that's what I do.
Starting point is 01:20:52 And he thought I was speaking to him. And like I pointed at this and I realized it was Tucker and he was trying to talk to me. And I just kept walking. I was like, oh, fuck. I big dicked him and I didn't mean to. Oh, damn. So Tucker. He's cool.
Starting point is 01:21:03 Sorry, dude. Yeah, that dude's cool sorry dude yeah he's that dude's cool as shit that's a real one you don't like tucker no i like him okay how been doesn't like colton though i knew that hates him alpin's a douche wants to pour salt when he's down so you're you you talk to tucker oh shit load yeah after the first day we call him tucker the fucker i figured i better go at least shake hands. Four kids, one in the oven. Cool as shit. Had his kids there.
Starting point is 01:21:32 A gem of a man. Always looking at his family in the stands. 30 years old. Dead last? Maybe. Where's he from? Five kids, probably Utahah i can't remember
Starting point is 01:21:46 a 39th uh samuel spurlin spurlin was cool dude too who is samuel spurlin oh yeah i barely brushed fresh elbows with him but i liked him goodbye hey shout out to sam for freaking just letting her rip on that last workout. Sam who? Sam Sperling. He sent it. Yeah, that's not a – He sent it and got a 33rd? I know it's not.
Starting point is 01:22:11 He burned up. What did you think about Brandon Luckett sending it on that last workout? A little tardy. The guys who absolutely obliterated the bike did not go as fast as they could have gone had they gone 15 seconds slower on the bike. He still got a ninth. No, no they 100 they broke the lunge what's the point of doing the bike in 30 seconds and breaking the lunge didn't everyone didn't every guy break the line no no hey except tutor tutor tutor sent it well he's an exception and there are things that he's freaky good at but his his ass cole sager didn't break by the way tutor's ass in quads yeah they're Well, he's an exception. There are things that he's freaky good at. His ass.
Starting point is 01:22:45 Cole Sager didn't break the lunge up. By the way, Tudor's ass in quads. Yeah, exactly. What about him? I mean, I think they might even be bigger than Gray Shavers. His ass in quads are crazy. He was wearing baggy sweats, and he filled his sweats. Tudor's got a big dick.
Starting point is 01:23:03 Sousa said Tudor's got a long dick. We saw it from the stand. How? Wow. Was it touching his mouth? Was it touching his mouth when he was handstand walking? Was it hitting him in the face a little bit?
Starting point is 01:23:18 Is it bigger than Uldis's? I never noticed. I never noticed that stuff and I was like, whoa. Rios, do we have video of Tudor? Hey, what's all this shit with girl porn, dude? It's all these girls. Oh, is he?
Starting point is 01:23:36 Yeah, I'm sure he'll be really upset about us talking about how big his dog is. Do we have video of Tudor handstand walking? Oh, my God. Rios is going to find actual porn. They're saying his dick's bigger than oldest's. It's probably bigger than that black dude you met in the bathroom. Whatever footage you got, you'll see it. Whose dong is that? That's a medium-sized dick.
Starting point is 01:24:03 Is that Australian dong? Yeah. I feel like I'm looking crooked. Wow. It goes the other way. Wow. That one looks like an organic sweet potato. You know, the little ones that are thick and maybe four inches long.
Starting point is 01:24:18 Guys, get this guy's a wiener off the screen. Welcome to the dong show. Dude, why does Vindicator know that Sprague is packing? Wow. Why do you know that? Guys, who is that? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.
Starting point is 01:24:37 This is the cock conference. Instead of docking. Instead of docking. Now listen, that's the body shaming thing. We couldn't be doing this with a girl. All right, pull up a chick. No, don't pull up a chick. This is bodily appreciation.
Starting point is 01:24:51 There's nuances. We couldn't be like, hey, look at that chick's giant tits while she's here. Oh, my God. You know how you know you're a pussy is when you say something like this. What? Why are people obsessed with genital sizes? You got what you got, just like everybody. You don't use a penis pump?
Starting point is 01:25:04 Dude, giant dicks are so cool. You sound like you got, just like everybody. You don't use a penis pump? Dude, giant dicks are so cool. You sound like you have a micro penis, Lance. Lance, giant cocks are fucking cool. I think my dick got bigger when I started testosterone. It's weird, dude. It's just crazy. I've heard that happens. Your dick got bigger on testosterone? We can bring in the leading expert Andrew Dick Size. Is it inflamed?
Starting point is 01:25:20 Alexis. Alexis, did his dick get bigger when he got on T? Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my God. Dude, Rios is a Mexican and he turned red just now. Holy shit. Rios just took too much Milano tan. Cfheptide.com. Use code word 7. Get the water for free.
Starting point is 01:25:50 This is Hitler's cock right here. Oh, jeez. What is that? Just a forearm size. Oh, nice. It's veiny. Ten. I want to talk about Colton a little bit more.
Starting point is 01:26:03 I'm struggling because I said I really like the workouts. And now I just see how emotionally attached I am to Colton a little bit more. I'm struggling because I said I really like the workouts. Now I just see how emotionally attached I am to Colton. I don't like the workouts anymore. I don't want to see machines. Too many machines. John Young, work with
Starting point is 01:26:19 me here. You got my back. Too many machines. I don't need to see the bike twice. The bike twice was a bad move. Sorry i wanted to jump in go john too many machines i think the bike on event three should have been substituted for a different gym what was event three again the uh 10 cal bike one legless 10 box jumps one legless and what do you think it should be replaced with i mean yeah what taylor i'm fine with that. What Taylor says is it gives you a push-pull and then a jump.
Starting point is 01:26:50 What place did Colton take in that? 24th? What workout is that? 3? He would have been in 17th. No. He would have been in 12th. 10 handstand pushups doesn't do a lot to a lot of people. 10 strict.
Starting point is 01:27:05 Yeah, they would go through that. With the legless, it's completely different, dude. Nah, bro. You don't know shit about that. How's Gray Saber upside down? He's pretty good. How's the hog? No, he's not.
Starting point is 01:27:18 Pull up the footage. Pull up Gray Saber? Not on handstand pushups. How many points is each place? It's just 10. Four. Four points? It's 70 total, John, with the legless in between. You start to accumulate blood in your forearms and your biceps and your upper body,
Starting point is 01:27:32 and that compounds it. Hey, so that would have given him 40 more points, and he'd be going to the games. Yeah, Colton would have won the competition if that was it. Yeah, probably. He wouldn't have won the competition, no. But he would have done better in the event. Hey, here's something else.
Starting point is 01:27:50 I think box overs are stupid. If you're going to do an over, it needs to be narrower. What do you mean? The box is too wide. You don't go over shit like that. You don't like how square it was? You know what it should have been? You want to go higher, like 48 inches. you don't like how square it was. You know what it should have been.
Starting point is 01:28:05 Or you want to go higher, like 48 inches. I don't give a fuck about the height. That's what people have always... It's the width. Right. Bring something else out that they have to go over. Why do they want that? Well, because it rocks.
Starting point is 01:28:19 It's square, so it's stable. Then bring out a yoke and lower it, make them go back and forth over a yoke. or or a burpee get over jerk blocks and then move the jerk yeah yeah yeah you move the you have a fucking dolly tired of the wide box and tired and tired of the machines it's i don't want to see the machine games i agree with the machine games thing it's better than last year though yes well here's how you fix that. The year before was even worse with the torque tanks and all them. They had torque tanks in a semi-final?
Starting point is 01:28:50 Yes. In every semi-final. The first year we did all this stuff, they had so many torque tanks. We will be back very shortly. Oh. Okay, we'll be back with shots of Tudor, Magda, Handstand Walking. We have them.
Starting point is 01:29:08 Really? We'll be back in just a second oh shit and we're hearing it's ridiculous it is ridiculous okay stand by duh this is called milano tan 2 it's supposed to accelerate tanning and it's also supposed to increase sexual arousal. And I think that the second one is actually more of a side effect than it is the main goal. Everybody wants to know how to reconstitute these things. Remember the first thing is that you need the bacteriostatic water.
Starting point is 01:29:34 Second thing that you need to do is you are constantly using these alcohol swabs. Now here's the thing, you got two separate needles. Never reuse the same needle. So what I'm gonna end up doing is I'm gonna put two milliliters of water into there. But it's just sucking the water in there. Yeah, I'm not doing that.
Starting point is 01:29:48 That's how you know that the peptides are good. Now, I'm insane, so I like to re-sterilize the top of it. I just put the pad on there and I just twist it. And I'm just gonna go right here, right next to my belly button. So I pull this out, put the tip in. Yeah, just the tip. So there's no air bubbles in there.
Starting point is 01:30:02 So you give it a flick, the bubbles rise to the top. Pull this out, and then I just take it with air bubbles in there. So you give it a flick. The bubbles rise at the top. Pull this out. And then I just take it with my stomach right there. Very slight little pinch. It's like the world's smallest bee. It doesn't even matter. I'm done. Just like that.
Starting point is 01:30:17 Oh, no, there he is. Okay. The video is uploaded of Tudor's magnificent handstand walk. Yeah. Are we on full screen? Until Taylor comes back. Taylor is eating a scoop of peanut butter or something right now. Do we get any sound on this?
Starting point is 01:30:34 He's bringing berries. Show me the hog. We're going to see it. Present the hog. Tudor Magda had a great showing. 10th place. Gave it his all in every workout. Impressive athlete. all hail the hog
Starting point is 01:30:48 Rios wants to be very clear that he did not shoot this. He doesn't want to take credit for will Branstetter's footage. Oh Okay, let's see. Tudor Magda, handstand walking. I don't believe it. He had to put his dick in his pocket. I don't believe it. There's chalk in there or something. There's no way. Do they make chalk that's shaped like a banana? Tubular chalk.
Starting point is 01:31:45 Wow. That's the only iron.? Tubular chalk. Wow. That's the only Iron Hog that would get it engaged. That's the only Iron Hog. Wow, that's incredible. Wow. Geez. Oh, Seamus seemed weird.
Starting point is 01:32:01 Yeah, that's... From this chat. Yeah, I swear to god i i seriously think this is plausible he brought a banana for a snack that's why he's a bad runner for sure he had a bit oh because of that thing you know patrick ewing used to have to tape his fucking dick to his thigh with athletic tape that's what tutor needs to do before he does a run workout college i'd do the same thing he's duct tape really yep he's what it'sor needs to do before he does a run workout. There's a guy I played soccer with in college that'd do the same thing. Use duct tape.
Starting point is 01:32:26 Really? Yep. He's what? It's a hindrance. Use duct tape. Every time we get a lot of fucking people, rip out the duct tape and just start strapping his dick to his thigh. Wow.
Starting point is 01:32:39 Dude, I'm a penis up guy. I could not have my penis down. Dude, we literally, we do show the athletes in a good light. It could be more of a compliment and talking about how fat your cock is we did we shit on our weekend long let's say this is giving him a little praise here is this why he never makes the games uh this is how bad it's in the way this is this is how bad of a student i was one time i signed up for russian class thinking it was spanish and it took three classes before i realized i don't think this is spanish nobody cares oh my god listen don't the athletes use compression underwear to keep us from moving around sometimes i don't get it he's
Starting point is 01:33:17 swedish he's dumb uh goodwill racing uh john young john i don't know it was a retard accent john young uh pray for these heathens every night body a body anatomy is something that is under appreciated i disagree oh we appreciate anatomy that that you're that's talking about fitness you're thinking of we appreciate it here okay i wouldn't hug that guy who after seeing that yeah what if it touched you you know that scene in the longest yard where they fucking go get fucking uh cold is it stone cold it's goldberg out of the fucking shower and they're like is that an iguana just hug like girls hug when they don't like each other did you see did you see tutor uh I feel like he was trying to get the judge to no rep Cole Sager. Like one of his lunges didn't count.
Starting point is 01:34:08 Did y'all see that? No. Can we pull that up? No, but Cole Sager did put it. Cole Sager, I think, did put in an appeal. I'd like to see that. But he did put in an appeal, I think, after the last workout, because he got a no rep on one of his muscle-ups.
Starting point is 01:34:22 Okay, John, go ahead. What happened? Caleb, if you can find the moment where Cole is finishing his lunges, like he's on the last, like him and Colton are going on the last way down. They pan to Tudor and Tudor is complaining
Starting point is 01:34:35 about to somebody on the field. And it looks like he's pointing at Cole. Interesting. Tudor was heckling at the finish line of event six in heat four. I don't know if he's pointing at Cole. Right. Interesting. Tudor was heckling at the finish line of event six in heat four. I don't know if he's heckling. Yeah, it felt like he had a joke
Starting point is 01:34:52 from yesterday. He's a coach, but look at that hog. Bigger the hog, the deeper the squat. I don't know if that's true because I touch my butthole to the floor and my dick is not that big. Just saying. We are about to see...
Starting point is 01:35:08 This is like TMZ shit here. We're going to see if Tudor was coaching one of the judges in regards to Cole's lunges. I don't know about that. No, okay, but
Starting point is 01:35:23 like... no okay but like it yeah this yeah that's what i'm talking about he's talking just whining yeah i thought like he was talking to like a coach but like if you go back and look at it like he's not he's talking to people on the field. He's definitely talking to someone on the field, but he might be talking to James Sprague also. Sprague's done. Sprague's been done for 30 seconds. As soon as the workout was over,
Starting point is 01:35:56 Tudor got up and him and James were hanging out for 10 minutes. Maybe he's talking to James because James is done. Maybe he's like... Hey, Tudor. You shouldn't have sucked earlier in the weekend home, right? Well, here's the thing. Oh, sorry. There were a lot of guys and girls out there shuffle stepping a fuck ton that did not get called on.
Starting point is 01:36:16 Name one person. Alex. Cole Sager. Yeah. And he's legal. I was. I thought he was. What's a shuffle?
Starting point is 01:36:23 What's a shuffle? So you take a few little shuffles, even if it's like a half inch, but it's not a full lunge. Alex stepped with the same leg on the last lunge. But again, she would have won regardless. I hate – like she could have went back and still won, but she did do it. Tudor hogged up. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 01:36:45 Will Colton – is Colton – who do you think Colton's fitter than? Who's going? Cole Sager Who's in? Ray Shaber, Brandon Luckett, Chris Ibarra I would not say he's fitter than Luckett I would say he's fitter than Chris Ibarra I would say he's fitter than Cole Sager I don't think he's fitter than Lockett. I would say he's fitter than Chris Ibarra. I would say he's fitter than Carl Sager.
Starting point is 01:37:05 I don't think he's fitter than Brandon, but he'd have more home runs than Brandon. How about Samuel Kwan? Oh, Colton would be more fun. Colton would be more fun to watch at the game than everyone except for Justin, Brent, Pat, and James. Dude, it's so funny. I legitimately think he's better than everybody except up to Sam Kwan.
Starting point is 01:37:28 Hey, send him a fucking wild card, Dave. You hear that? Wild card invite. Yeah, Taylor said it, Dave. Do it now. I don't think he'd accept it. Fuck that. I'd accept it. Dave Eubanks, wow. Dane Eubanks, can someone talk about how bad the live media coverage is in CrossFit? The interviewer
Starting point is 01:37:43 today made me want to pop pills. There's no enthusiasm, no drama. I thought that guy's great. What's that guy's name? Arsenault. The boy in the striped pajamas. Yeah, he's good. I thought he was great.
Starting point is 01:37:53 He's got an elk dress. Fucking beard, dude. Really, Dean? I thought Arsenault was great. He had some great questions. He did look like Hamburglar. He looks like fucking Where's Waldo, dude. I didn't see it today, but yesterday I watched a bunch of his questions.
Starting point is 01:38:08 He's fucking good. He looked like he fucking snorts croissants. Guys, Mike Arsenault is the least of your worries. Yeah, can we talk about the real problem? Lauren Khalil? Yes. She got... You listened to the broadcast? I listened to all of it.
Starting point is 01:38:23 All of it? Come on. He looked like a 60-year-old dude who goes to a baseball game with headphones on. All of it. What's the difference? I heard enough of it. I understand. Her headphones on listening to the radio.
Starting point is 01:38:35 No, it wasn't her first one. She's already been anointed the first female to ever do live broadcasts. Oh, well, that's just not true. I will tell you. Beth fucking Moens. And you know who I view? I will tell you what I believe everyone's and you know who i will tell you what i
Starting point is 01:38:45 believe everyone's thinking is that she was not very good she's that is the nicest that i could put it yeah she sucked that's that's being objective and why was she not very good she was repetitive on every first one off the rower and it's like no not the first one off the rower and also that you keep on saying first one off the first one into the first one into the end. It was just so repented. Incorrect. They were incorrect. Unofficial time. Oh, the unofficial time thing was wicked.
Starting point is 01:39:10 Yeah, she was saying incorrect things about athletes. Who was she working with? Specifically, John, do you remember the unofficial time? She was ruining Adrian Conway. Adrian Conway fucking kills it, and she was dragging him down by his fucking ankles. You know what she reminds me of? Just let me get this off my chest. If you've ever watched college football
Starting point is 01:39:26 broadcasts, you'll probably know of a name, and it's Beth Mowens. And it's the bitch that when she fucking commentates, you mute the TV because you would rather not hear anything than hear the dumbass takes that she comes out with. Jeff Baco,
Starting point is 01:39:41 she wasn't that bad, guys. Yes, she was, Jeff. I haven't seen Jeff around in a while. Beth Mullins. Good to see you, Jeff. Taylor Spitt. Listen, be honest with me. Be honest with me.
Starting point is 01:39:53 It was bad. Did she just have one or two bad calls? No, she had about 100. She would say wrong names, and she would say the people that did stuff. Wrong times. Wrong times. Wrong times. Yeah. Not doing record times.
Starting point is 01:40:08 Like, yeah. A tutor. Furry Show. Go ahead, John. Even Olivia. Olivia broke the world record by over a minute. She beat the world record by over a minute. It was like a Friendly Fran-esque performance.
Starting point is 01:40:23 In the handstand walk? In the handstand walk? No, the snatch ladder. Snatches. It was one of friendly Fran-esque performance. In the handstand walk? No, the snatch ladder. It was one of the most dominating events. And when Tyler puts the Z-score out, you'll see. One of the most dominating events we've ever seen. From like a period in the CrossFit world history. Don't body shame her, John.
Starting point is 01:40:38 Don't body shame her. And Lauren just says at a time of 358. Shut the fuck up. Nobody was like that. Maybe she doesn't like women. Maybe she doesn't like women. Lauren just says at a time of 358. Shut the fuck up. Maybe she doesn't like women. Maybe she doesn't like women. Okay, the poll is in. And then Tyler Watkins gets the floor. The poll is in. Who's more accurate?
Starting point is 01:40:56 Sebon looks homeless, 45%. Danny's top is too small, 55%. How many votes? 376. It is close. Caleb, am I wrong about that? That's how she said it? No, you're absolutely right. It was monotone.
Starting point is 01:41:08 It was just like as if anybody else had finished the fucking workout. And the same thing happened with Tudor. Tudor broke the world record in dominating fashion. And just Tudor Magna with an unofficial time of 216. Beth Mowens is actually better than Lauren Khalil because Beth Mowens doesn't even get on the field calls wrong. She doesn't get any of that shit wrong. She just has an annoying voice.
Starting point is 01:41:32 And Khalil has all of it. Annoying voice, wrong calls. Hey, someone said maybe she's just not a good partner with Adrian. No, it's her. Maybe it's Adrian's fault. No, it's her. Maybe it's Adrian's fault. Adrian's babysitting fault, dude.
Starting point is 01:41:44 Put this on Adrian. Stop it. Stop it. Adrian's fault. Maybe it's Adrian's fault. Maybe it's Adrian's fault, dude. Put this on Adrian. Stop it. Cancel it. Adrian's been good. Adrian's been really good with other people. He's amazing. He fucking murders, dude. And the guy actually knows what he's talking about.
Starting point is 01:41:54 He's a fucking game staff. He's been a savage. He's been there, done that. He's a savage. Do you think it's a conflict of interest? Oh, she cut Adrian off all the time. She referred to the fifth event as the last event at one point.
Starting point is 01:42:09 Oof. This is a thing, dude. The problem is they get rid of somebody like Chase Ingram, who murders it, only to get rid of Chase Ingram. He doesn't broadcast anymore. He was last weekend. I've heard that was his last go and not his choice.
Starting point is 01:42:27 I don't know. Hmm. If this is factual, then Lauren Cleo's in for it. How is the video cooking? How is the chat with her? It's through the chat was pissed. She's a dud. Was the chat working her?
Starting point is 01:42:43 Oh, like going after her. Yeah, was she getting ass pounded? That was working her. The chat was the chat working her oh like going after yeah was she getting ass pounded yeah that was working her the chat was working her hard bro work and listen guys me and travis brault are commentating every event so you mean that 12 year old you mean that gay little kid from call of duty yeah tell travis gold he needs a big old dose of testosterone tell him to use some semen retention he sounds like he jacks off 12 times a day and he's got no testosterone. How old is that guy? He was really good at play-by-play.
Starting point is 01:43:10 He's older than I am. You guys at least sound excited. You need to hook him up with whatever you're on, Hiller. He'll make a voice deeper. Who's driving the SUV? No, that's a Dodge Charger. They're all stolen around here. Later, JR.
Starting point is 01:43:25 He did great. We're going to still on around here. Later, JR. I learned he did great. We're going to commentate all of the East, too. Now we're going to talk over Taylor's events. John, to what you were saying, she would have scored 17 points. I know nobody loves P score. P score, Z score. It was probably the most dominating performance besides Matt Frazier. In Friendly Fran.
Starting point is 01:43:44 In Friendly Fran. Oh, Olivia. Totally glossed over. She didn't qualify. She would have qualified if they had scored it like this. But they will never do that. If more athletes had been in the field
Starting point is 01:43:58 to middle everyone else, she would have qualified. But it's only 40 athletes. Who aren't in the same fucking league as her on this event. Okay, so what are we going to do? It's flawed. Not only is it flawed, then they don't even talk about how impressive it is.
Starting point is 01:44:16 I think that's the point. She goes to the games and she has a standout performance like that, which is more eyes, more entertainment. Don't body shame her. He was about to good call. Well, that's what happens when you're Lauren Khalil.
Starting point is 01:44:29 If another woman is successful and starts to murder it, you get insecure and you try to gloss it over. So people don't forget that you're the real Felici. You're being way too hard on Lauren. Jeff Baco. Oh, Jeff Baco probably beats off to her. I don't like her,
Starting point is 01:44:41 but damn, you guys are awful. I masturbate. I don't like her, but damn, you guys are awful. Do you masturbate to her, Jeff? I believe it's just trying her. Jeff 100% fabs to Khalil. What's fab to me? Fab? I don't know. It's just that...
Starting point is 01:44:54 Oh. Hey, is that right? Is that what fab means? Yeah. Why are you asking me? I know. Why are you asking me? What does it take for someone to get removed from position like that because like she was not good and jeff's like i agree she wasn't good but you're well the better question and like at what point
Starting point is 01:45:15 how awful does it need to be i'm gonna say i'm gonna say something you guys are gonna think is a joke but i'm not joking please budget cuts. Oh, stop. The better. So she's cheaper than whoever else would have been there? I mean, why not? I'd fucking do it for. Are you trying to say women are cheaper than men? I would suck doing what she does. I'm just saying that you guys are asking what would it take to get rid of her,
Starting point is 01:45:38 and maybe they're trying to give her a chance. They're trying to bring up someone new who also costs less. Then train her. Listen, me and Travis will do it for $100. What does it take to get her into a position like that? I'll do it for $2 on a live stream. That's what it takes. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:45:55 She was a news anchor somewhere. Yeah, she was a news commentator relative to the area she was in. It was probably the biggest news station. It was for three different states. She had shitload loads of experience there. It's different than, you know, the news.
Starting point is 01:46:09 We all know the news. So you're proof that she would be good. Is that what you're making? And she's been in the CrossFit space for a fucking long time with very knowledgeable, knowledgeable people. Tommy and Shawnee are fucking super. But the news is curated and it's fucking lies.
Starting point is 01:46:22 So red flag, number one fair. And you don't really need any more red flags than that. She's big CNN. One red flag. You just brought CNN into CrossFit, dude. Hey, what would it take to get Lucy over here? I think Lucy Campbell was way better.
Starting point is 01:46:37 She was good. Money. It will take money. That's a good point. Another fucking $3,000. So you got to fly her out, put her in a hotel and fucking give her some pocket. Dude, they throw money down the fucking drain. Probably have to pay somebody to sabotage her wrist next year.
Starting point is 01:46:50 Honest question. Okay, here's the deal. Here's the deal. I got a question. I got a question. Can John go? What benefit does it bring anything, Don Fall being here? Serious question.
Starting point is 01:47:01 Dude, he's the fucking CEO of my company. Okay, I'll be Don Fall. That's like saying, well, I'm done. I'll tell you what i'll tell you what i'll give you an honest no let me give you an honest answer i want to be done there's a shitload of affiliates there okay okay and what a great place to fucking get facetime with affiliates well was he with affiliates or was he i don't know but that's all i'm just telling you that's what greg did i didn't see him at the hwp i did bro i saw him
Starting point is 01:47:22 there just the whole time maybe an hour or two don't send your freaking ceo out there for however much money it costs and instead pay someone who's actually fucking good at broadcasting so that everyone else in the world watching can enjoy the experience but how many people are watching online a fuck ton how many people were were there? None. So cater to your audience, please. Sorry. Dave saw him not wearing a shirt, right? I want to see what Hiller looks like as Don.
Starting point is 01:47:54 Don hates me now if he didn't already. Go ahead and play Don. What did you want to ask me? Can't ask it. All right, here, here, uh,
Starting point is 01:48:06 commercial. Uh, you want to ask him about why you, can we get a better commentator? Hmm. Questions run quite a bit deeper than that, but, uh,
Starting point is 01:48:19 that's one of them. Well, what? Yeah. Here's my question. Why call me Mr. Fall, Mr. Fall. Thanks. them well what yeah here's my question why call me mr fall mr fall thanks i am too emotionally immature to ask you a question without using swear words or without getting passionate
Starting point is 01:48:33 and without maybe even some sense of character assassination i just don't have it in me but why the fuck would you why the fuck would you take your media department that's already been castrated the nuts have been cut off the testicles are all over the floor you took the scrotum and threw it out the fucking door Why would you then take the cock and cut it right off at the base
Starting point is 01:48:54 You wouldn't even leave a half inch on there What was the base that I got rid of recently? If they're going to cut it off you might as well go down to the root You don't want to leave a half inch Who are you? Mr. Paul, can I ask you a question? Mr. You don't want to leave a half inch. Who are you? Who invited you here? Mr. Paul, can I ask you a question?
Starting point is 01:49:08 Mr. Paul, can I ask you a question? Did you see how big Tudor Magda's cock is? I did. I saw him on podcast at the hour 25 step. That shit was crazy, dude. Actually, when I looked back up at the ASAP show booth, they all had their phones out and were zoomed in on Tudor's hog. I think we've got an iPhone 11. That's the next one they're gonna cut off they're coming for it to answer
Starting point is 01:49:28 your question they're gonna mount it on their wall all right uh we had a fabulous weekend right great event we had fun great community jeff a good time hillary yeah sure did yeah nice and hot sunburned and everything yeah good people i didn't get any sun do you have any um do you have any uh do you have any stories uh any stories that stood out to you like someone told you like they were going to commit suicide but they watched one of your videos and they didn't or you have any anything somebody show you the stats right before or the scores right before the end of this did you have a good time taylor how was the community do you have a good time the community was amazing it really is right yeah how many fights did you see?
Starting point is 01:50:06 Not a single one. How many drugs deals did you see? Including me? Yeah. Tyler, did you have a good time? Huge. Sousa? Yeah, tremendous. Can you do tremendous for me? Tremendous. It was tremendous. Couldn't have been better. It was the biggest.
Starting point is 01:50:25 Oh, Alexis. It did feel like old regionals in that way. Sousa had a really good point. You guys should hear this too. First of all, if you didn't go, you're crazy because it truly was a remarkable event. Dylan did an amazing job. Dylan did great. No, you know who did the best job of everyone?
Starting point is 01:50:41 That's a true thing. Dude, listen to this. Me. No, stop. You did okay. But sorry, Loud and Live's a true thing. Listen to this. No, stop. You did. Okay. But, um, uh,
Starting point is 01:50:46 sorry. Loud and lives, media director, Kenzie, dude, she fucking killed it. She did kill it. She annihilated it.
Starting point is 01:50:52 Sasha was loud and lives, media director. I don't know who that is. We dealt with kids. We only had help from Kenzie. Only Kenzie. Okay. Great.
Starting point is 01:50:59 I always thought Sasha was in charge. I don't know who that is. I just don't know her. Athletes were in the crowd all over the fucking place. had great access to the athletes they walked them through the crowd they also had security there i don't want anyone to think it like it was a pain in the ass for the athletes or people walking the athletes through but you could ask them for autographs you could see them they mingled around at the top a lot they came in and out of the stadium everyone knew where they were coming in and out you could could get close to them. It was,
Starting point is 01:51:25 it was, uh, I would like to know from the athlete perspective, if they felt like it was overwhelming, like being up with all the fans and stuff. Cause it didn't, they didn't seem overwhelmed to me. No.
Starting point is 01:51:35 And even if they were, they got to suck it up. Right. Right. But it just, you know, it's, it's easier for them.
Starting point is 01:51:40 I thought that was great. What's FOMO mean? Okay. I would normally like, I never get FOMO. If. I would normally, like, I never get FOMO. If I didn't come to this, I'd have FOMO. It was that good of an event. But you're going to have FOMO next weekend, bro. Probably.
Starting point is 01:51:54 I had FOMO. You did have FOMO? Yeah, it was that good. You got a media pass? Didn't even sign up for one, did you? How'd you get one? I didn't get one. Sousa signed up.
Starting point is 01:52:04 My agent signed up for me my agent got me everything by the way we had complete and unfettered access at the event the behind the scenes are going to be yeah yeah I would say because I'm tuned up a little bit even better than the games so
Starting point is 01:52:20 you're going to get some real intimate shit all right anything else or it's time to say something about multiple people coming up So you're going to get some real intimate shit. All right. Anything else? Or it's time to quit. Alexis said something about multiple people coming up to us and saying BPC 157 cured every issue they had. And they were dead serious. Oh, at the event? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:52:36 What did they tell you, Alexis? I injected it here. I injected it there. It fixed my knee. It fixed my shoulder. It was crazy. CApeptides.com. Hey, you know what else I heard? I heard it helps gut I injected it there. It's fixed. My knee, it fixed my shoulder. It was crazy. Uh, ca peptides.com. Hey,
Starting point is 01:52:47 you know what else I heard? I heard it helps gut health. Is that true? I have heard that. Yeah, it's supposed to. Yeah, that's nuts.
Starting point is 01:52:56 Uh, yeah, you need a little help in that department. And if you guys do, no, no, no, I haven't been,
Starting point is 01:52:59 I haven't been farting the show. Do you order it? A guy, Matt Maldonado is the guy you got a PayPal. Cause it's all wacky right now, that's a real person. So I had people ask me, do you know this guy? Yeah, he's real.
Starting point is 01:53:10 CAPeptides.com. Put in your orders. You code word Sevan or Hiller. Hey, by the way, someone said in the comments, I don't know, that the show wasn't professional or I shouldn't have been farting't professional or I shouldn't have been farting or something. I shouldn't have been farting.
Starting point is 01:53:27 Well, or something, but Oh, well, that was you. Yeah. Did you do that? What?
Starting point is 01:53:33 That? Oh, well, yeah. Oh, well, you guys, uh,
Starting point is 01:53:38 real fake, real fake. I promise you the rest of the shows won't be like this. Please forgive me. No, um, this show, just remember that if you. No, um, this show, just remember that if you don't like that,
Starting point is 01:53:47 this show is not for you. It's not that the show is not professional or is professional. It's, it's a bunch of people who fucking, um, work their ass off who are fucking top notch in the, uh, their experience with CrossFit and their understanding of CrossFit and their
Starting point is 01:54:00 ability to articulate it. And, but we're also, you know, 15 guys in a fucking house. And you're going to get a wide range of characters, cast of characters. And so if you don't like it, it's not for you.
Starting point is 01:54:13 So when you say we're not professional, maybe you're just a fucking bitch. I apologize for absolutely nothing. All right. John Young, sorry. I'm sorry you had to hear that. Matt Dennis is a point. Okay. What did he say?. I'm sorry you had to hear that. Matt Dennis is a point. Okay.
Starting point is 01:54:27 What did he say? Lauren Cleo is professional and she ducked. What's that mean? She sucked. Oh. That's all. But she is professional. 1,300 live viewers and nine likes.
Starting point is 01:54:38 That's the way we roll. Shout out to Kyle Southmade, who won in the Heat 1 at $1,500. Shout out to John Young for getting 11th. Really? Yes. Senior analyst in the CrossFit space. Senior analyst. How did Brian Friend do? James Sprague got 7th.
Starting point is 01:54:54 How did Brian Friend do? James Sprague got 7th. Brian got 9th or 8th. No, no. I heard Brian won it, but he didn't enter. So James Sprague beat Brian Friend? James Sprague is pretty smart. That's crazy. Brian, no. I heard Brian won it, but he didn't enter. So James Sprague beat Brian Friend? I think so. James Sprague is pretty smart. That's crazy. Brian should retire.
Starting point is 01:55:10 James just put his name down for everything. And he did really well at everything. To protect another CrossFit Games identity on the Heat One app, Dallin Pepper, I won't give his name away, got top
Starting point is 01:55:25 30. He was definitely top 10 for the last day. Wow. These dudes are good. Sprague only missed like six points on the women overall. Guys, the Sevan meet and greet was awesome. There was a Sevan meet and greet? Yeah. We drugged you.
Starting point is 01:55:41 You laid out on the ground. There were so many people standing around you, touching you. You laid me face down. Everyone got a cold one. I'm doing that tonight. Alright. Anything else, guys? Thanks, everybody. Rios, how long?
Starting point is 01:55:55 Good luck, Taylor, next week. Thanks, dude. Did you just start to hurt your ears? Sign up for your CEO memberships. Behind the scenes, we'll go behind the paywall it'll be back there for a couple weeks a month a year and then it'll be released adios and then we're gonna have another behind the
Starting point is 01:56:18 scenes in two days by the way next week's gonna be amazing we are going to really really focus on Daniel Brandon for the behind the scenes next week it going to be amazing. We are going to really, really focus on Daniel Brandon for the behind-the-scenes next week. It's going to be a Daniel Brandon documentary, too. And then also, Dallin Pepper. Jason Hopper.
Starting point is 01:56:36 Taylor Self. Austin Hatfield. Austin Hatfield. Can he talk? By the way, if Austin Hatfield is fucking... He's like a redneck mute. If you have problems with my accent, you better fucking buckle up.
Starting point is 01:56:52 It would be great if you guys could get him to talk. That way we can make fun of him. Dude, he's... Yeah, you will have specific rad wristbands that let you talk to Danielle. It'll be just there to say rad. Do they say I'm gay? It says I blow rad.
Starting point is 01:57:07 Okay. I'm not wearing those fucking bands. Alright. Love you guys. Tomorrow's show, tomorrow morning's show unless Susan and I do it from the car won't be happening. We'll be driving back to the Bay Area. But we will do a show late night tomorrow night.
Starting point is 01:57:25 I'll try to get Andrew on it to do the Dave Castro Weekend Review. It'll be really late night. Andrew's flying home too tomorrow. So if you're up late tomorrow night. All right, guys. Bye-bye. Bye.

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