The Sevan Podcast - WIN A Trip To See Kill Tony w/ oohbabybeast!
Episode Date: December 11, 2024My Tooth Powder "Matoothian": https://docspartan.com/products/matoothian-tooth-powder 3 Playing Brothers, Kids Video Programming: https://app.sugarwod.com/marketplace/3-playing-brothers/daily-practice... ------------------------- Partners: https://cahormones.com/ & https://capeptides.com - CODE "SEVAN" FOR FREE CONSULTATION https://www.paperstcoffee.com/ - THE COFFEE I DRINK! https://www.vndk8.com/sevan-podcast - OUR SHIRTS https://usekilo.com - OUR WEBSITE PROVIDER ------------------------- ------------------------- BIRTHFIT PROGRAMS: BIRTHFIT Basics: Prenatal - https://birthfit.mykajabi.com/a/2147944650/JcusD5Rw BIRTHFIT Basics: Postpartum - https://birthfit.mykajabi.com/a/40151/JcusD5Rw Consultation with Leah - https://birthfit.com/store/birthfit-consultation-sevan-podcast ------------------------- Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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TD, ready for you.
Really?
Well, I cut it off before I set everything up.
You had to prep.
Bam, we're live.
Good to have you.
Oh shit, I didn't know.
I thought we were already live.
No, we're just live now.
What a generous offer you're giving.
All right.
Okay.
I just need someone to come with me
to be my fucking emotional support partner
You tell me where you're going
so I'm going to Austin, Texas December 29th to January 2nd and
to see
Comedy first off. I wanted to go there to see kill Tony and it's so hard to get kill Tony tickets
like literally they sell in like bunches every four months or so,
and they sell out in like two seconds.
So the fact that I got arena tickets
for like New Year's Eve basically was fucking crazy,
two front row tickets.
And then, so I got those tickets
without anyone to go with.
And then I met a guy that was my boyfriend
for the past three months.
And like, I met him on our date like he was a photographer
I've we're doing a photo shoot and he said he watches kill Tony and he's been writing jokes for a year
so I was like, okay cool like
you could come with me to kill Tony and then we ended up getting into a relationship and then it kind of I
Don't know. I made a joke like two weeks ago
Like Tony's gonna be my baby daddy
And he got mad at me and he said go to Texas yourself
So I was like well, I bought all the tickets myself and I'm fine. I
Guess I will but but you actually have tickets for the mothership Joe Rogan's Club the night before on December 30th, right?
Yeah, so the mothership I'm going there when I land in Texas, December 29th, comedy
mothership, Joe Rogan's comedy club, um, at 8 PM and then the next day is
Kiltoni at HEB center.
So it's usually Kiltoni is at the mothership, but, uh, this is like a
special edition and they do it in the arena.
So it's gonna be like 8000
people and usually Rogan goes to those shows, the arena shows too and you know a bunch of
famous comedians are gonna be there.
And then the next day I have another comedy club, the Vulcan Gas Company.
So like three back to back days of just comedy shows.
And the tickets for Killtonia front row.
Yeah.
It's crazy. I got them.
I didn't even, I was just like, what the fuck?
And so you have two tickets for all the nights.
Yep.
I don't think anyone's going to have the balls.
Well, listen, if you have, if you want to, and, um, you, you don't care
if a boy or a girl goes with you.
Yeah.
Anyone.
And you already have, I love that a gay, I love
the gays, the lesbians, the bisexual, on the LGBTQ I approve. And you have tickets in the Airbnb
already? Yeah. And you're flying from San Francisco on the 29th? Yeah it would be
ideal if like they fly out with me cuz that would be cool
Cuz then we will get to know each other
And I calm you down. I like personally I hate flying
That's why I want someone to come with me
Kylie's an OG she used to tag us at barbell shrug years ago. Oh hell. Yeah, I love barbell shrug
CTPs the man. Yeah, he is the man. She was grinding in her backyard slanging weights. Yeah, I'm still doing that.
So yeah, so when I go I want to do CrossFit when I'm there too, and I'm thinking I'm gonna go to
CrossFit City Lights or City Limits in Austin, Texas.
So like you could get a weekly pass and just like go for two days and we'll pay it all off.
We're gonna be there for like four days, so.
And if someone wants right now,
they could text me their number and I'll send them a link
and they could come on and you could meet them.
And if you like them, you'll take them.
Yeah.
They have to be like down
because I wanna get like the plane tickets like as
soon as possible because it's like New Year's Eve. You know, it's going to get more expensive
the longer I wait to get the tickets for the plane.
Should they stay should they stay sober and have some like chaperoning skills?
What? Should they?
Usually I'm chaperoning people.
Oh, okay, okay. Well, I mean, it would be nice if they were sober,
but like I drink, I've dated sober people.
I used to be sober.
There's like two years of my life in my twenties.
I'm in my thirties now where I was like sober
for the full year while I was dating a dude
who was doing cocaine and drinking.
So I know how to babysit people,
but I would prefer them not to do cocaine around
That's another thing like with my ex-boyfriend. I told him like personally
I don't want to be around cocaine because I've done it and
I've had bad situations. There's a lot of funny stories, but
My significant other I'd rather not have them do it. I could hang around people doing cocaine
I just don't want like me to do it or
The person I'm dating to do cocaine and that's kind of what would happen the the night of the election when Trump won
Like he was doing it with his liberal friends and I was just kind of irritated
I couldn't celebrate Trump's win because he's with his lib friends and wait you were with libtards on the night of the election
Wow, wow
Tards on the night of the election doing coke and they were doing cocaine. Wow. Wow. I called them
It's all a bunch of dudes You know, I feel like I'm a tomboy so I could hang with them
But then I was just like so irritated I couldn't celebrate and I was just like I just called them all faggots
I mean, I call all my boyfriend's bitches and fags
So if anyone does date me you have to be prepared for that
But your perp, but you'd be happy to take a faggot with you on the trip you'd be
Oh, yeah, I love them. Yeah
Yeah, fair enough
Fair enough. That's why you get a pass using the word and any other any other
Requirements um
What did I say what if they want to date you what if someone sees you and they want to fall in love with you
Is that is that is that a good person who should who should apply? I mean, I can't predict the future
So, I don't know
Look at Heidi's even saying oh wait, no, hold on no
Just to clarify do we do we need to want to date her in order to call in?
No, no, you don't have to date. I'd rather you don't date me
I'd rather like just be my wingman or wingwoman
Honestly, right you don't have to date
Yeah, every show is fueled by paper street coffee. My wife just made this shot of espresso diluted in a cup of water.
That's what she said to me too.
You're gonna drink coffee?
I said, absolutely.
Hey, is the ex boyfriend bummed at all that he's not going?
Yeah, the funny thing is that I was,
I wanted to talk it out with him
and I said I was free yesterday
and it turns out he said fuck, he flew to Vegas.
He said Vegas probably doing cocaine right now.
And I'm like, he didn't even call me yesterday
We could have like talked it out and he didn't so I'm just like fuck whatever because he doesn't care
Yeah, why doesn't he care? What happened? What was the you guys didn't three months is a good relationship wasn't there good?
There wasn't good. So he fucking loved me
but the thing is like That I felt itty that night when Trombone and I couldn't celebrate and then I left in the morning of course
He said I didn't do cocaine that night him and his friends did so I got up early and I took all the shit
I could carry and just left and then he texted me later that day. Thank you, babe for letting me sleep in
I'm like, okay, and I just felt like wrote and I haven't had I've seen him one other time since then
but I haven't had sex with him since then and
Also, I was supposed to see his mom for Thanksgiving, but she saw my fucking Instagram and
Like she knows I do like only fans and playboy and shit
But then that didn't like bother her but the fact that I voted for Trump
She like uninvited her son to Thanksgiving.
And I'm like, okay, I feel really bad now because that all his friends are like liberals.
And then his mom is like, she doesn't want me to me around because I support Trump.
And I'm like, I don't even know if this relationship is going to work.
So then I just like, kind of stopped like distance myself for a while.
Were you ever a liberal?
Yeah.
And what happened? How did you change?
Um, well funny thing so you met my ex-boyfriend Jason. Yeah
Portero Hill CrossFit he owned Portero Hill CrossFit. Yeah cross it
I'll in San Francisco and we met at his gym
I've been across it for 13 years and so I would always just drop in across the gyms
just to do the open.
So then I dropped into his gym like years,
like over a decade ago.
And I was finishing up the open with that workout
with the thrusters and bar facing burpees,
like, what is it, like 16.5 or something, 14.5.
And then 16.5, it was a repeat.
So it was that workout, it ended.
And there was a bottle of Jameson on the counter and
right after the workout like
I'm the first one who walks up and opens the bottle and then Jason walks up to me and I'm like
Oh, this is a nice gym and I'm the only one drinking to Jameson and he's like, oh, yeah, thanks
I own it and then since then me and Jason were a couple for 10 years
So he supported Trump and then, I was never into politics, but you know, eventually it
kind of grew to like Trump and then Jason got me into watching like Joe
Rogan and jujitsu and all that stuff.
And then you slowly just flipped.
Yeah.
It's like the past few years too, the past four years.
I'm just like, oh my God.
Are you living in, are you living actually
in the city in San Francisco?
Yeah, I live in San Francisco.
It's funny when people always ask me that all the time
and I'm like, yeah, I live in San Francisco
in like one of the most expensive areas too,
which like in my backyard, it's like,
where the fuck is she?
Like this is what you afford when you're living in San Francisco.
There's like, everyone's a techie here, everyone's doing cocaine, everyone has multi-million.
Multi-million is everywhere. It's crazy.
Do you have a lot of suitors? Like when you leave the house, are there a lot of guys like hitting on you?
Yeah. And a lot of crackheads too.
They're everywhere. But that's why I don't like to leave the house. I get fucking terrified. Will there be whole days where you don't leave the house?
Yeah.
I don't like leaving the house.
And is the city going to shit?
Huh?
Is the city going to shit? Um, hmm.
Thanks to Gavin Newsom.
If you go downtown, that's where it's really bad.
But if you're like in a neighborhood, like a residential area, it's, it's not as bad.
Like if you're in a more expensive area, it's not as bad as like going downtown.
That's where all like the crackheads are and this is in
This is your backyard here
Yeah
And that's still where you work out today
Yeah
Go ahead the fucking Dave Cash show rig
Is it screwed down
Yeah, my ex-boyfriend's friend screwed it down for me.
And how long have you been at that place?
I don't know forever.
But it's like I used to basically since I was with my ex for 10 years, I would just
like sleep at his place and train here.
But since I broke up with him, I'm just like here now and I've been wanting to move to
Texas for like
Years, I've been wanting to go to florida or texas
But now since the comedy scene is all going to austin texas now. I'm just like I have a reason to go to austin now
And you because you want to do comedy
I mean, yeah, I do kind of
I mean
I've always wanted to be a comedian but like stand-up. It's kind of it's scary
But you know when I started watching that show kill Tony. I'm like oh shit
It's like I see a lot of people bomb and I'm like oh man. Maybe I can do this
Maybe I just need one minute of good shit
Hey, and if um if if you go when you go
To the big show on December 30th in that arena
Will you be prepared with a minute of comedy in case you get called up?
I I have it prepared it's been prepared for like two months now. I have like I kind of edited it and is it I
edited it It sounds like I kind of edited it and is it I edited it
It sounds like I'm stuttering but yeah, I have that minute and I'm not gonna change it
Because it's like a full minute and um, it talks about how I love Texas how I hate San Francisco
it talks about
San Francisco, Texas and then me fucking talking shit about Tony and talking shit about myself, so I think it's a good minute
Do you flirt with Tony in the minute?
Maybe yeah, there should be some flirting with Tony
God he hates that shit too. He doesn't like being flirted with
Mmm. Well, he's an easy target. He's easy to make fun of so it's like just like an easy easy fucking bit
At the end though, and you must be pretty obsessed. You must be pretty into it if you're going out there I mean, that's it's pretty hardcore what you're doing
Um, I don't know I have no idea I don't know what took over me, you know, what's crazy it's like
My ex my not Jason my
other I was dating this scientist at Stanford and he got me into watching
Kill Tony like last summer and it's funny because I wasn't really paying
attention because you know during the time Tony's on at 6 p.m. Pacific and
that's when I like to eat food and like have sex and so I was like what the fuck
is this show?
I just see a bunch of people bombing,
but it wasn't until like the Tom Brady roast
where I actually saw Tony Hinchcliffe perform
that I was like, oh, he's cool.
Like I like him, I like his comedy.
So then I started watching the show again and I was like,
oh, you kind of have to watch it a few times to understand
like how it goes You know call or hi
Hi, sebon, this is the 42nd former president bill clinton calling in bill. Do I have something for you?
Oh, i'm excited sebon. I'm excited. I saw the advertisements for the show earlier and
Damn, i've got my perennial penis all excited
Bill do you have a pass from Hillary to maybe do a three-day stint in Austin?
The bottom glad you asked that question and for all the listeners of the show
That are tuning live right now all three of you. I just want you to know that
That are tuned in live right now all three of you. I just want you to know that
Have sexual relations with that woman and I'm very loyal to my wife Hillary Clinton
But please have all from the bottom of my heart. Don't tell my wife that I'm trying to win the show is
Do you find a?
Kaylee attractive. Oh
She gets me excited so long So she's very beautiful.
You are a very beautiful woman.
Thank you.
Um, I was reading the star report and it doesn't sound like you reciprocated
with, um, uh, Monica that that's the only relationship I've known you to have in
the past.
Uh, will you be reciprocating if for some reason you were fortunate enough to,
um, have intimate relationships with Kaylee?
That depends. So on the, this Kaylee likes cigars. I'm a big cigar guy. I
Would like it if you perform some like sax for me some like
Saxophone. Oh, all right. Just a little just a little music. Yeah, I love music
I'm a pretty good musician myself so long. I can I can learn on the music. I'm a pretty good musician myself.
Simone, I can I can learn on the fly. I'm pretty good with my
mouth. If you know what I mean, Mr. President, I understand you
didn't know the most of the requests we're going to take
tonight, you have to come on the show and see your face. But we
already know what you look like. And so it's great that you
called in and right now you're the frontrunner,
I think.
I just wanted to take initiative. You know, I proved to the American people that I'm for
the people and I take initiative and I have drive. I used to be a former lawyer. I don't
know if you know about that, Kaylee. I was born in the beautiful state of Arkansas. Go
Razorbacks. I was born in the beautiful state of Arkansas Go raise backs. Do you know bill clinton? Do you know bill clinton kaylee?
I i've heard about him. Yeah. Yeah, okay
Is there anything you'd like to ask the president? It's pretty crazy that he calls into this show
um, I don't know but what do you think about our um,
our current fucking
Donald j trump commander in chief?
Kaylee, I'm really glad you asked that question.
I'm very disappointed in the outcome of the election.
Kamala Harris is a woman for the people.
And even though it wasn't the result
that the people truly wanted,
I'm just happy that there's gonna be
a peaceful turn of power.
Now I have a question for you, Kaylee,
and this is a very important question.
It's a very important question
that I hold dear to my heart.
Have you ever heard of Perone's disease?
It's a very hurtful disease.
What is that?
Crooked penis.
Oh.
Like if your penis goes at a 90 degree angle.
Oh my god.
You ever seen one of those?
No, I've never heard of that.
I've never seen that.
I've never experienced that.
Now, Kayleigh, I want to be straight.
Yeah, Kayleigh, I want to be vulnerable with you right now.
My penis is very, very crooked.
It's a very hurtful disease and sometimes it even hurts to have an erection.
I think a lot of the time, a lot of the times I have to perform what's called a side plank
on the toilet just to make sure that my urine gets right in there Wow
I want I want to know if you can take care of daddy take care
Hey I can picture that that's a great visual
90 degree angle on the pin penis and you have to kind of almost do like a handstand so your penis or
Side you must be super fit by doing that shit.
Oh, I can show you just how fit I am. Kayleigh.
Well, Mr. President, thank you very much for calling. That's
fantastic.
Did I win Savone? Am I the winner?
I'm just writing your name down. I'm just writing your name down
here, Bill Clinton. And we'll get back to you. She'll get back
to you.
How do I win?
Do the people on the chat vote?
Come on, people.
No, no, no.
I think it's Kayleigh's decision at the end of the day.
Ah, shit.
This is not a democracy.
Thanks for letting me call in, Kayleigh.
Good luck on the show.
Thank you, Mr. President.
Wow.
Oh, wow. Dude. Wow. Oh wow.
Dude.
Now we just need Dr. Phil Collins.
Yeah, uh, I wonder if he would come with the Secret Service.
Oh, that, ooh, that's a plus. I love that.
Wow. You know, that's why I believe in aliens.
I dated a Secret Service agent and he fucking kept asking me about aliens all the time.
And I was like, what the fuck?
Why do you keep asking me about this?
It's so weird.
Like what would he say to you?
Like he knew that they existed?
Well, he kept asking me if I believed in them.
I was like, I don't know.
It's so funny.
Sevon knew immediately.
What did I know?
I don't know anything.
What?
I don't know anything. What?
I don't know. I think that they're suggesting that I knew that I knew who the caller was or I knew the caller was gonna Call in the president. I had no idea. I'm always surprised when the president calls in.
This mofo dated all sorts of dudes. Oh Bill Clinton?
What?
Really? Yeah, unless he's talking about you. You haven't dated that many men, have you?
I have dated a bunch of dudes.
Oh.
Oh god.
Hey, when did you start your OnlyFans page?
I don't know, a few years ago? It's funny. I had an account. There was another platform that was similar to OliFans that I was on before there and I made more money on that platform. I wish I would have stayed on it. It's called CelebTV. I actually have like 2 million followers on there but I'm not even active on there anymore.
Why don't you do't post the same content on
the each platform you have to make specific on yeah and imagine I'm already
making content for Instagram for like Twitter and then my only fans and then I
have another account where I have to make only fans content again then I have
to make twice the content so it's kind of it's better if I just stick to one platform, you know gotcha
Someone will ask her what 77 plus 23 is
What a hundred nice Wow. See what the fuck?
Okay, they saw the giant boobs and they didn't think you were smart Oh
I'm Asian
Yeah, yeah. What are you? What's your ethnicity?
My dad's a bunch of, he's white.
Well, he's German, Irish, Scottish, and my mom's Filipino.
So like this tall, my mom was like in love with Top Gun.
She calls him like Tom Cruise, like a tall version of Tom Cruise and Charlie Sheen.
And then my mom's a short little Filipino lady.
It's funny.
Is she attractive?
Yeah, she's cute
Someone wants to know what's your friend time? Oh
I don't know my best friend time. Yeah, probably around like 430. I'm tall so
It's around that time. How tall are you?
I'm 5'9". Yeah, that is tall. Yeah, and it's
tall. I'm like, I'm never gonna be great at CrossFit. I'm way too tall. I mean, I tried
really hard for like a long time, but I'm like, oh my god, like spending hours. There were
days I would like workout for like five hours a day,
like in my twenties. It's just a lot. It's just a lot.
You got to be good at everything. It's hard.
It's going to be tough. It's going to be tough to top Bill Clinton.
Caller. Hi. Hey, what's up, dude? Hey,
I'm Mike's friend.
He told me to call this number.
Mike who?
Pool Boy.
That pool boy guy.
Yeah, do you have a name?
My name's Tony.
Tony, hi.
Not Hinchcliffe, right?
No, not Hinchcliffe. Talk talk to me, why did you call in?
Pool Boy just texted me in the evening when I was eating dinner.
He told me to call his number, so I just called it.
Are you watching the show?
I was.
And then I called the number.
Are you single?
I am single.
And are you interested in going to a comedy show?
100%.
Three comedy shows.
I have those days off work.
Wow.
Are you a looker?
I just started, yeah.
You just started what?
You just started what?
Are you handsome?
I just started looking.
Are you handsome?
Well, I think I'm handsome who does Mike oh Mike does
Can you call in are you too shy to come on the show
No, I can come on okay here let me I let me, I'm gonna, I'm gonna text you a link.
Cool. Okay. All right, here we go. Let me see. Recent settings or recent calls. Okay. Text. Send link.
All right, here we go.
Look at pool boy trying to set you up with one of his friends.
Look at that.
Yeah, I was reading the comments. I'm waiting for Heidi to call in.
Heidi said, Heidi said she would call in but she doesn't have any clothes on right now.
She's naked. What? Yeah, I saw her. I meant to pull that comment up.
What is she doing?
It's late for her.
Say it's late for her. She's it's like probably 1030 for her.
She's naked. You know what I mean?
She's she's lounge around in bed naked.
OK. Yeah, that's the thing.
I do like to sleep naked.
That's why I'm like, oh, man, it would be better if I have a girl with me.
At the Airbnb, Tony, what's up, guys?
There's Tony. What's up guys? There's Tony. What are you? Are you Filipino? Are you Asian? I'm you in the know? I actually work in the city
where uh
Baby beast lives. Oh you have Cisco. Yeah, I do. Oh
That's cool. Yeah, but not in tech
What do you do?
Something in public safety, I can't talk about it. Okay.
Law enforcement?
No.
No. Okay. Do you deal with nuclear stuff?
No, no nukes, dude.
Okay. All right. All right. Just checking. And who did you vote for?
Trump.
Worth the 50 yard line.
Yeah.
Worth the 50 yard line.
And do you have a bad cocaine habit?
I don't do drugs.
Wow.
That's good.
Do you drink alcohol?
I do occasionally.
Okay.
And you have very nice teeth.
Oh, thanks, man.
Yeah. And you have very nice teeth. Oh, thanks, man. Yeah
We both have nice teeth Hey
Kaylee weren't you saying that you're getting tired to just you're getting tired of paying for people shit this guy look at his
House he's got he's got house with molding
on the ceiling
Francisco I can't be Where do you? Like what part do you live in?
I actually live in San Jose, but I commute to say, oh, you fucking liar. Oh my God. I didn't lie. I
never said I lived in. You said you work in San Francisco. Yeah, I do. But I live in San Francisco
like half the month. Why don't you live in San Francisco?
Well, I work there.
You work from home a lot?
No, I work in the city,
but I stay there overnight for my shifts.
Oh, okay.
And Kayleigh, you said you like to have sex around 6 p.m.
What do you normally do at 6 p.m., Tony?
Well, I'm hanging out with Mike usually at the gym 6 p.m. All right, Mike's gonna be okay with that Wait, where's he what gym do you guys go to?
CrossFit kindred in San Jose
I actually used to go to Petrel Hill when I live. Oh really? Yeah, I never met you
Yeah, because I would all I would
go there on like the off hours because my dude owned the gym so he would want to train when no
one was around. Basic what what years did you go? I went like 2022-2023.. Yeah, he wasn't like, yeah, both of us. We weren't there at that time.
Okay. Did you meet Alexis? Yeah, she coached me. She's fucking awesome. So that's Garrett,
I have to shout her out because she's like one of the best coaches I've ever met in CrossFit.
You would agree, right, Tony? Yeah, she's good. And then Rachel. She's fucking awesome. And like, I think everyone at Petora Hill, I think they all are level three coaches.
If you ever were in San Francisco and you would need a fucking gym, CrossFit, Petora Hill, all level three coaches.
Yeah.
They still require masks there?
I don't think so.
I have no idea.
All right. Any other any other in your free those days? I Have no idea
All right any other any other in your free those days I am free those days off work
All right, and are you a comedian? Are you funny? Do you have any jokes you could tell me?
I'll come up with some jokes
All right.
I mean, since you're in the city,
we could actually like meet.
Yeah, I'm down.
Okay.
I get off work either Wednesday or Thursday.
So you're like free the whole day?
Yeah.
Okay.
Do you have any jealousy issues? No. Okay, because this
is a lot of woman here, there's gonna be all sorts of like, you know, things that like,
you know, she walks down the street and there's just eyeballs everywhere just sticking to
her. Yeah, usually crack that eyeball. That won't make you that won't make you you're
fine with that. You're not you're not you understand. I'm cool, dude. Yeah, you're fine with that. You're not, you understand. I'm cool, dude.
Yeah, you're cool.
All right.
And she's pretty good looking, right?
Yeah, she's hot.
Yeah, you haven't stopped smiling once.
I'm trying to hold mine back.
Dude, that's impressive.
How can you keep such a straight face?
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
I know my wife is watching.
I'm gonna try.
I know my wife is watching, there you go.
Yes.
I couldn't do it. All right, fantastic. Thank you. Thank you. I know my wife is I know my wife is watching there you go
Alright fantastic Tony I have your phone number. Do you check your DMS Kaylee?
Well, I do but then I feel like I'm shadow banned So I don't know what Instagram does because I feel like they're like not showing me all my DMS
Because I barely get any Okay, I'm writing down your phone number now
Okay, I have it and we know pool boy for some reason you get lost in the mix
Cool okay, and you sound like you have some sort of security guard job so she would be very safe in your presence
Accurate okay, okay
All right, all right, wow fantastic. All right, Tony. Thank you very much. Any other questions, Kaylee?
Um send savan all your information
Cool asl What asl are you too young? Um, send Savon all your information cool ASL
What?
ASL are you too young to understand what that means?
Sign language? Oh age sex location. Oh
Pop thing he is a cop
Okay, now I feel stupid.
All right.
Thank you very much, Tony.
Thanks for having me on the running brother.
Thank you.
Good night.
Bye bye.
All right.
The show's a success.
Shit.
He was nice.
I really like him.
He's safe.
Yeah, he's safe.
He sounds looks like he can afford the plane ticket.
He won't get jealous.
Oh my god, I almost dropped my paper.
Wow. Yeah, like he doesn't do drugs.
Steven Flores, she's got some crazy hammers. How big are those?
They're double D's.
Yeah. Aren't they ranked by like millimeter or a milliliter or something?
Yeah, yeah, it's funny cuz I'm very I'm like a tall basically like a stick I'm just tall and skinny naturally
So those are bees actually you should tell people those are bees
Very small frame they're just bees
No, they're big I'm'm naturally like flat chested.
It's funny, I reached out to a games athlete
that I thought had fake boobs and she confirmed with me.
So I wanted to know if I could just still do
like cross-ed movements with fake boobs.
I don't wanna say her name
cause I don't know if she wants me talking about it, but.
Sure.
You mean this is before you got them
Well, I got I got two boob jobs
So one was to get to D and one was to go to double D which is like a small change, but
It looks completely different from before. It's kind of weird how that works
But I don't know. I just wanted to ask her if I could still do stuff. She I
Don't want to say her name, but the most like she was there when they did Fran
at the games and she was like, I think she played second at Fran at the games.
It was like, probably like over a decade ago.
So I don't even know if anyone knows her that I'm talking to right now.
I know who it is.
I'm not gonna say anything.
But yeah, she had she had fake boobs and she's but she went up like a small size.
Because I think like some of them already have if you already have like boobs and then you could go a little bit bigger
But I was like flat completely flat so I had like nothing so like for I used to do like strick ring muscle-ups all the time
But I can't do that now like and I don't know why I would want to try that because I'm not even like competing
But I kind of miss doing that.
The boobs stopped you from being able to do the strict ring muscle ups?
Well it's just like it's just the weight so basically I have three pounds on me now that
I didn't have before so now when I do like when I do pull ups it's weighted pull ups
or handstand push ups they're basically weighted so they're harder and people like make fun
of me because I have boobs so like it's easier to do chest to bar pull-ups
It's actually harder because I have more weight
And I'm like and I do push-ups all the time
Everything just like
Gymnastics got a lot more difficult, and I'm already tall so I'm like oh man
You know I don't believe I don't believe anyone made fun of you
If you would like to go to Kill Tony, the mothership and some other comedy club the
day after and the Airbnb are taken care of, Kayleigh's just looking for a good companion
who would like to go to Austin and have the time of their fucking lives.
Boys and girls and fags and and everyone can apply anyone anyone can apply
ideal that may be the one thing you can't be is you can't be a Kamala supporter or have a coke problem.
Yeah, no, not that.
Hey, are you following the UnitedHealthcare story with the CEO that got shot in the back?
That's crazy. Yeah, what's what's that about?
They caught the guy. Really? Yeah, his parents. He's a he was
the valid Victorian at his high school. He's got an IQ of 130.
He graduated top of his class in college and his parents are
filthy, filthy, filthy rich. And they they're they're in
healthcare. That's what i
heard all that today that just came out yeah it just came out
are you sure is that they really know that guy are they making it up
i mean there's other accounts that say the whole thing is bullshit and it was
it's it's to distract us from uh your boobs
yeah i don't know well i can't really you can't really trust anything anymore, you know
No, look at pool boys a little matchmaker. That's crazy
Um, so so the only fans so it doesn't you don't put a lot of work into that I
Do you do I personally I talk to the people I know like a lot of
the girls they have their accounts managed and like guys are talking to the
people but I actually talk to the people and I post all my own things like same
from Instagram and Twitter yeah and sometimes like I don't get back I guess
fast enough so like people get irritated and I'm like yeah, that's because that's not a dude behind the computer
Fucking talking to you. Yeah, I know other people that's exactly right
I know other people where it's the dudes talking it's dudes talking to the dudes who think they're talking to girls
Yeah, it's funny. Yeah, but I'm talking to them
I personally don't do like any video chats or anything just cuz I don't know
I just like put out content there and I like message people back.
You have, you have boundaries.
I guess that's what it is. Call her. Hi.
Savvy. Hey. Hey, this is pool boy. Hey, what's up dude?
Hey, I just want to say you can fucking end the show now man, because there's
My boy was the only boy with the fucking balls to call in. Hmm. Everyone in the chat fucking pussies
Not anyone else is calling in my boy is
Shredded he's dope. I kept saying he should have fucking took in his shirt off because the man is
Rick Wow I kept saying he should have fucking took in his shirt off because the man is really ripped. Wow.
And he's got, and like, honestly,
I'm not even kidding, Seb.
I tried to give him my exerciser
and when I handed it to him, he was like,
dude, what am I to do with this fucking key chain?
It's so small.
Wow.
Because his hog is so, it is huge.
Wow.
That's crazy.
Hey, Andy seems like a gentleman.
He seems like he's like keeper material. Dude's crazy. Hey, and he seems like a gentleman. He seems like he could be he's like keeper material
Dude insane. He fucking volunteers on his days off from his job
He goes and volunteers at the local puppy shelter and just walks all the dogs. Are you kidding me?
No, dude. He's a fucking gentleman, dude
Wow
Hey, I'm gonna tell you a story. There is one time he's a big sushi guy. I hope you love sushi,
Kaylee. So there was one time me and my boy, we went, Tony, we went to go to our favorite spot, Kenzo sushi, shut out. And
join our like 18 rolls of sushi. And a random older woman comes to our like, when I say older, she was like senior citizen, like 80.
She comes over to our table and she approaches Tony and recognizes Tony and starts to thank
him for volunteering at her senior center from the other weekend.
The dude is an uptight as a standard
He is the perfect man that you would want to go to Texas and see a comedy show with he's just a gentleman
Wow
That's good to know
Yeah
Wow, that's so I just wanted to call in. Hey, she's my boy. She's a lot of woman
You think he can like he can handle it?
Honestly, I should be asking iflee if Kaylee can handle him. Wow, okay.
Have you ever heard of the bonsai drop, Sebi?
The bonsai?
No, should I go to the Urban Dictionary?
Yes.
Kaylee, if you want your world rocked, let my boy tell you. the box ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Think of me as a dude. Alright. Okay. Alright.
Good luck with that.
Good luck with that.
Think of her as a dude.
Good luck with that.
Matt says this to you, pool boy.
Matt says I have a better story.
My friend banged a chick with no legs once.
Wow.
Alright.
Oh my God.
Alright.
Maybe Susan can call in.
Susan, ask Grace if you can call in.
Alright.
Hey, you're a good dude.
You're the best friend a man could have That's right. That's what it says on my Instagram. All right
Thank you, thank you very welcome. Yeah. All right. You're welcome in the show now. Bye. Thank you
Hey, how long you how long go ahead
Why isn't anyone calling in?
People are scared. I'm scared. I'm scared Yeah. Hey, um, how long do you, how long? Go ahead. Why isn't anyone calling in?
People are scared. I'm scared. Hello.
Heidi.
I have to call in now because you said pretend she's a dude. So here I am asking.
What's going on? What are we doing?
Oh, you do like comedy. Send her a link. Get on the video call.
I can't. I'm naked. Wow. You're still naked. Wow.
The body's just hanging. Well, I didn't, I'm not going to put clothes on.
I'm going to bed.
Heidi, would you really go to Austin?
Well, yeah, of course.
And you'd be, and you'd be a good wingman.
Uh, here's the thing.
He has, I'd be the best wing woman.
Yeah.
Except, you know, she's apparently tall, apparently hot, apparently huge boobs.
I'm going to look like a fucking dipshit next to her is the problem.
You are not.
So there's that.
So there's that because you know I'm I have CrossFit boobs they're flat.
Yeah I had them too.
That's why I got a boob job.
Right.
Do you have any problems with a CrossFit girl going with you that's flat?
Oh, you're asking me?
Yes.
No, I prefer a CrossFit girl because then I wanted to do CrossFit and I want to sleep
naked too.
So right.
So it only makes sense.
Right.
And those dates work from you December 29th to January 2nd?
Yeah, of course. New Year's. Wow. Listen, Sev, I know I let you down when we met in real life, but I was very nervous. You never, what are you talking about? You didn't let me down. I loved
you to death. Well, the thing is this, I get nervous around you South because you're so hot and then I
just get a little clam up a bit.
I had no idea.
I didn't sense any of that at all.
Oh, okay.
Good.
So anyway, yeah, my boyfriend was there when I met seven and then I was nervous and then
but now I'm a single woman
So now I'm free to be me again
What happened to your boyfriend?
He moved to Alaska. Oh
Why?
His kids are his listen girl long story, but his ex is crazy
She kidnapped the kids to Alaska couldn't get him back. So he had to move there. And so I said, all right, dude, I don't need a pen pal.
Okay.
Bye.
Yeah.
You're done.
Yeah.
Hey, I think it would be the time of your life.
If you went with Kaylee to Austin, it would be just crazy.
It would be, well, just let me know.
You let me know, girl.
Let's go.
And you're very, Hey, Tony, go ahead.
That guy, Tony, he's great great and he'd be a really nice
Um, you know no offense to him. He seems like real
Straight arrow if you will, but I just don't think that would be that fun. I'm not talking trash, but kind of you know
What I mean, what wouldn't be that fun?
He just seems a little slow
You know I don't know. Are you talking about banging tony wouldn't be that fun. He just seems a little slow. You know, I don't know. Are you talking
about banging? Tony wouldn't be fun. Which Tony are you talking about? Oh, the guy who
called in the Asian guy. Oh, I thought you were talking about Tony Hinchcliffe. Okay. Okay. No, no, no. I, Tony Hinchcliffe is not going to be even in my purview.
I mean, her boobs will be covering half my body.
He won't even be able to see me in my seat.
Right.
Good point.
Good point.
Yeah.
No, no problem there.
All right.
And you'll be, and you'll be, if she goes up there and does a minute of comedy,
you'll be like standing up and clapping and laughing joke Yeah, like the thing is like if he pulls me up
I'm gonna be able to pull you up too. Like you need a minute, too
Oh shit, you need a minute ready. Well, that's
Okay. Well, i'll i i i'll have to work on that. That's uh, that's the funniest person in the chat should be no problem
Yeah, okay. Well, sure no problem well, i'll just say i'm the funniest person in the chat should be no problem. Yeah. Okay. Well, no problem
Well, i'll just say i'm the funniest person in a
YouTube chat
It's great
All right
Well every day I want to do crossfit every morning. So like the day of uh before kill tony
Like crossfit and then we go get food like meat
And then we fucking rehearse our jokes and then we fucking rehearsal jokes and then kill Tony at night
So that's like that big. Hey, there's a really hot dude waiting on the video
I'm just telling you girl
Here's a plan. Okay, girl. Here's the plan. Don't don't tell anyone if you can recruit
Let's recruit a couple hot dudes too.
And, but surprise, they gotta pay their own way.
And also they don't have tickets to the show.
Oh, forgot.
It's sold out.
They're all sold out.
They can be at the Airbnb just chilling.
They can just be waiting.
They can be cooking us dinner.
They can be waiting outside.
And by the time we get home. It's ready
right, I Mean I just have a sick Airbnb
so
There you go. All right. All right. Let's see this guy Heidi. Oh you want us to stick on and see
Yeah, is that really your name big Big Baca? That's my nickname.
Yeah. And are you, are you, are you big?
Yeah. You can say that. Yeah.
How tall are you?
Six, four.
Holy shit.
How heavy are you? How much do you weigh?
Uh, I would say average like 230, the 235.
Oh shit. Oh my God.
Wow.
Did you play football?
Uh, yeah, I played collegiate football, but no, Oh my god. Wow. Did you play football?
Yeah, I played collegiate football, but no we're big
Okay Heidi can you stand?
Rob Morris University in Chicago
Okay, Chi town. Yeah, I was bigger before I was about 275 before I started CrossFit. Oh wow. I see him
What do you think?
That's what okay
That's a lot of man Sir, don't listen for a second, please. Okay, that's what I'm saying. He could be waiting for us at the Airbnb
Just in an apron and naked in an apron big
And big
You know what's crazy is they might do it they might agree to it that's what's crazy
That's right, they will Heidi I agree
Mm-hmm. They'll do them for them. They will do them for them. Those are the pronouns. They and them.
No, they don't.
You don't use pronouns, right?
Big Baka, who did you vote for?
Fucking Trump.
Oh, wow.
Wow.
You gotta be an idiot not to vote for him.
Wow.
Heidi, who'd you vote for?
Oh my God. Heidi. Oh, Trump of course. Okay, wow. Wow Heidi who'd you vote for?
Heidi Okay. Wow. Yeah, all right. So everyone's at the 50 yard line
Now a big bucket, you know kid the kill Tony show. Yeah, I've watched a couple episodes of it
What do you think you laugh? Yes, it's pretty funny
Hey, um, and what if she goes on stage and she brings you with her? Maybe you could just stand there and be serious.
I'll just be, I'll just be your bodyguard.
Yeah, that would be awesome.
Just behind her.
Just like always put your hands in front of her boobs.
Like, Hey, I don't want anyone staring at her boobs.
It would be a great bit.
I have no problem with that.
That's actually super funny.
Yeah, that would be a great.
What do you think? Kaylee, he's a looker, right? Look at that
She said do you have any and I was just guessing what the next word was I said do you have any jokes?
No, not on top of my head right now
I'm just calling in because poo boys calling us pussies in the chat so fuck you Pooleboy.
Oh, yeah there you go Pooleboy.
Are you friends with him too?
No I know him, I know him.
Well just through CrossFit and qualifiers and stuff like that.
Everyone knows Pooleboy.
Is this guy married?
Are you married?
That's a great question.
No I'm not married.
What?
Is he divorced or what's the problem?
No. I think Heidi wants to date you divorced or what's the problem? No. Yeah,
yeah, who doesn't? Jesus Christ. I'm just asking. It's just a question. Hey, come to
Waterpalooza. You'll see me there. Are you competing or just hanging out? No, I'm
competing in the RX individual division. Oh shit, congrats dude. I almost made it to
Elite. I was sitting at 11th, but then dropped. Oh shit
What state you live in Illinois?
Okay in Chicago
Northwest suburbs about 45 about 45 minutes away
And are you okay?
Maybe flying out to San Francisco a day early and hang in with Kaylee and get to know her and then and making the whole trip
together Possibly. All right. That would be ideal. Yeah. As
long as it fits in the schedule. And do you have a day job? Yeah you can say that.
I have a part-time job. I have a confusing lifestyle you can say. Anything more you
want to share with us? Are you a dancer dancer stripper? No, no, no, I
Currently care give for my parents. Okay elderly and sick. So and so can you get away for three or four days?
Well, that's the thing. I would have to find someone to watch them for me. So
Wow, so you're a man with a big heart and good family values
Yeah, yeah, I moved back home a year ago,
dropped everything to take care of him, so.
Holy shit.
Wow, a guy who walks puppies
and another guy moved back to take care of his parents.
What can you say?
Yeah.
Straight up gentleman on the show.
Do you have any weird things about you,
like any crazy bad breath
or the protein powder you take makes you fart a lot,
makes you bad a lot makes you
Bad in there being be anything crazy like that
No, I just gotta work out. That's it
That's what that's what that's Kaylee. She just has to work out
When I wake up, I'm just like the Kool-Aid man, I'm just like bursting through walls. I'm like I need to work out
What do you normally do at 6 p.m?
I'll keep that in private.
All right.
Okay.
All right.
Okay.
What else?
Any other questions?
Do you have anything to tell me?
Like why should I choose you
other than what you've already told us?
I don't know.
That Tony guy looks small in video I could
definitely protect you compared to Tony. From Tony? Oh the other Tony. I'm getting confused now. He didn't look too big on camera so I don't know if he can protect you or not. I can.
How are you are you jealous man? No. No. Okay. No.
She didn't come. If she went, if she got called up to the stage and she didn't come back for four or five hours
and she was just lost with Tony Hinchcliffe in the back somewhere,
you'd be fine with that. Oh yeah. Just chill. Yeah. He's, he's got nothing.
Yeah. I wouldn't be worried. Okay. Okay. All right. I, I, I trust my girls.
What do you do? Is Heidi still on the fucking call
Heidi
Okay, what's up? I was thinking I could watch his parents. Wow
Wow Heidi will watch your parents Heidi you are fucking now you're a great wingman
Hey, my dad would love to have Heidi here. I'll tell you that whose dad wouldn't what does that mean?
The girl who sleeps naked
I think we got we have to like start a group chat with everyone who's been on the calls
Just hash just hash it out make it even more awkward. Yeah. Yeah, it's trivia night. Yeah
All right, and you're single
Two when we're not naked and then we can all be on and then we'll have to do like Oh contest
Yeah number one, you know, I'm pretty sure we're gonna have we're gonna need like then we can all be on and then we'll have to do like, Oh, contestant number one. You know,
I'm pretty sure we're gonna have,
we're going to need like one more thing like this. What if she, what if,
what if Katie's going through like, uh, are you okay if it just stays in the
friend zone during the trip? Oh, on the trip? Yeah.
Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. But, uh, it's, you know, the goal is to possibly,
you know, not be in the friend zone afterwards, but.
Right.
Like it's a great trip, you guys get along good.
She sees that you don't throw your underwear on the lamp
and you're like, maybe this is a guys' trip.
Yeah.
I'll move, we'll move to Texas.
All right.
Oh, you're willing to move to Texas?
Cause I'll move to Texas. Well, I'll move anywhere Texas. All right. Oh, you're willing to move to Texas? Cause I'll move to Texas.
Well, I'll move anywhere warm.
Okay.
Texas, Florida, Arizona.
Yeah, I've been like, like I said,
for the past few years, I've been wanting to go
to Florida or Texas, but now like,
since the comedy scene is going to Austin, Texas,
now like I have a reason to go there.
Yeah, Texas would probably be the better idea. Yeah. big baka. What's the longest relationship you've had?
Well
Probably like eight months. Okay. Oh shit only eight months, huh? That's it
Yeah, no long-term serious relationships here. Oh, why not?
Why?
Good job, Heidi. I don't know. I probably because college football is a lot and then and then I just took CrossFit super seriously and and all the girls who
don't do CrossFit just don't understand what CrossFit is or how much time it takes. You
never found like a girl at the gym or anything. There's no no ladies out here for CrossFit days or how much time it takes. You never found like a girl at the gym or anything?
There's no ladies out here for CrossFit where I live.
Oh.
Yeah, right.
That's weird.
Do you have Perone's disease?
No.
All right.
All right.
I look at me and Jeffrey are on the same wavelength
right when I said that he typed it in. Good. Wow. Wow. All right. I look at me and Jeffrey are on the same wavelength right when I said that He he typed it in good. Wow. Wow
All right
All right
Does he have anger problems?
No, yeah
You don't take trt or anything? No, no peptide. Oh god, you know a jason my ex of 10 years
He used to rub it on his fucking arm and I think it rubbed off on me
When I was with him and I would have like anger issues. What, the Sasso and cream? Yeah. Fuck. I'm like what the
fuck? That's why I got so angry all the time. Isn't that crazy? That's been strange. Did any of your body parts grow?
Me? My clit? Your mustache. Yeah. No, I mean I've always had like a mustache because I'm part
Filipino and we're just like hairy all right but we have hair everywhere big
Bucky you okay with a little mustache we didn't even notice we didn't even notice Kylie we didn't even notice What colors the pillow sub on?
What what pillow?
Exactly skin color
Okay, why am I like fucking sideways dude grab your phone and do something with it shake it or something
All right big Baca, thank. I have the list here.
I have now Tony, Heidi, and Big Baka.
All right, the only thing I have,
if I win this trip, she's gotta come to Waterpluse
and cheer me on then.
Wow. Okay.
I'm down for that.
That sounds fun.
All right, it's a deal.
All right, brother, thank you.
You made the show.
Get Heidi in the chat.
She'll watch the show. All right. About seven. Cheers, brother, thank you. You made the show get Heidi in the chat All right, so on cheers brother. Thank you peace Wow
What the fuck happened to my phone can I say something about that I would love for you to Heidi
Hold on. I'm picturing you naked and talking. Okay, go ahead. Okay, and I'm laying in bed. How are you going to say, I'm sorry, sir.
You're going to pay for his whole trip, three nights of comedy, free tickets.
He gets to share an Airbnb with her and then she owes him another trip.
Well, they have to pay for that.
They have to pay for their airfare.
I think that was his way of being flirtatious.
Yeah. Okay. They have to pay for their airfare. I think that was his way of being flirtatious.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, I don't feel flirted by, by it.
You didn't like you on your behalf.
You didn't like the hard to get play.
That's the opposite.
He was like, okay, if you choose me for the trip, then you also have to come cheer me on at water Palooza.
That's asking a lot.
I mean I think he spends a lot of time working out so that's like a big thing on his fucking to-do list so you know if he's like taking time off from his family and working out to
go to Texas to watch comedy shows I think it's kind of fair. Okay, sure. All right. All right. I could be wrong. I could be wrong.
I liked your questions. Is he on TRT? That was a great question.
Yeah, I didn't know that. I don't want anyone rubbing that shit on me again.
It's crazy. Yeah. You don't want to get used up on accident.
I saw a natural path, right? Cause I don't trust doctors.
And I took like a urine and blood test and then my fucking my
Testosterone levels. I don't know what year I did this but my testosterone level so like out of control
Like it was like way high like my testosterone is so high and I'm like so then I started drinking to like control it cuz
Drinking like gives you more estrogen
You're a fucking chemist.
Wow.
Right.
Yeah, of course.
That's what I do too.
Anytime I'm like really excited to fuck my wife and she's doing something she can
where she can't fuck.
I just drink a bottle of Jack.
Hell, it totally helps.
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Send me a link.
Cole, Cole, listen, Cole, listen, listen, Cole, listen, homo.
Listen, listen to me, you homo.
This show isn't for you.
OK. Go get your fifth booster.
Go talk to your shrink about your fucking desire to fucking be with dudes and beat it.
These guys and said one positive thing in the comments.
Yeah, just some douche canoe.
He's pissed off. He's pissed off Pissed off that you're single
Thank you for re-spelling dang damn
Yeah, cool. Yeah, he's criminy cool fucking go jerk off and come back
It's funny when people like I used to like post and goes and then on my Instagram
But I wanted to like talk back now and it's funny when somebody goes on my page and says something and then I respond to
them and it like hurts their feelings I'm like dude you're on my page talking
shit to me and I say something to hurt your feelings I'm like what the fuck what
is wrong with people yeah I agree what's going on here you don't have to watch
this you could go you could leave you bitch. You want me to go on one of my rants? You fucking pussy ass bitch.
Say that to my face.
Yeah, Cole came from red.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Yeah.
I like it.
Heidi, you're like, you're like one of the rappers on stage, the hype man, after she
says something, you say the last word.
Yeah.
Yeah.
To be honest, I wanted to hang up, but there hasn't been a right time.
Jeremy World. I mean, not that I want to hang up. No, yeah. Hang out. Hang out. Jeremy World.
Can my kids come? I don't know. I don't know. Can my kids come? That's a great question.
The Jeremy has an outstanding body and he's very, and he's very fatherly and protective.
He's very protective.
Okay.
Is he gonna be my bodyguard too?
Probably, I mean, he'd be good at it.
All the guys look like they'd be good.
The only one who doesn't look like they'd be good at it
is Heidi.
Heidi, pick a fight with me.
I'm almost a purple belt by the way dang
So I don't
Are you really?
Yeah, damn Heidi. Do you really want to do comedy cuz I want to bring uh someone who actually wants to do comedy
She is so funny, dude. She's the funniest person in the chat by far. There's no,
I mean there's some great people in the chat Barry McCaulkin or her, Jake Chapman, but she's
pretty fucking funny. I think she's like if I had to rank him I'd put her at number one.
Thank you. Yeah she's funny and very dry humor. I do like the idea. I do like the idea of a big
baca standing behind you blocking your tits from people watching. That's that would be
so funny. Right. Yeah, that's a thing. Very dry. I'm quite dry. In general. Good. I like
that. What pussy dry sense of humor. I'm not saying that that's what they just say on the
street. That's yeah. Yeah. That's what they just say on the street. That's yeah.
Yeah.
That's what they're saying.
Yeah.
That's not me.
That's not coming from my mouth.
You know them, they, they say that.
That's it.
That's what everyone says.
That's what it said on the bathroom wall.
When I went in there, Heidi, Heidi, Crume, dry sense of humor, wet pussy.
Well, that's good.
At least how tall are you?
At least the bathroom people know what's what you do.
Wait, what?
What'd you say?
How tall are you?
Oh, I'm five, six.
Oh shit.
You're tall too.
Wow.
You're, you're not wow. You're not tall. You're a normal cross-hitch high.
It's not tall.
I mean for me it is.
When you talk to me you'd be like this.
Hi Savon, how are you?
No, it's so funny.
When me and my ex Jason met Savon
we were like, oh he's so cute, he's so small.
Yeah, I think that's what
everyone thinks.
Oh, hi. Hi, how are you?
Hey, it's weird for me if I go somewhere and I look down on someone.
If I see someone shorter than me, I trip.
I'm like, whoa.
Yeah, that would be weird.
Hey, when I met you, Heidi, when we went to that bar, you were completely covered up.
Like you had seven layers of clothes on, a fucking baseball cap, dark sunglasses.
Okay, listen. No, not you, Heidi. Sorry, sorry, not you, Heidi. Kaylee, sorry, sorry. Oh, me? Like you had seven layers of clothes on a fucking baseball cap dark sunglasses
No, not you Heidi. Sorry. Sorry. Not you. Hi the Kaylee. Sorry. Oh me. Yeah, Kaylee. Yeah, you remember
Yeah, we went to that we went to field works and you you you look like a boy even like you were completely
You look like the guy who did the fucking CEO shooting the health you were completely covered
You don't remember that
I don't even remember what I was wearing but I wasn't like covered up layered. Yeah layered No skin showing you don't just your hands
Wait, what was I wearing? I don't remember. Yeah, you were like in a trench coat and everything
It was
And she completely true she didn't talk for the first two drinks and then she got the third drink in her and it was
Like on like Donkey Kong
Yeah, I'm like who the fuck is this?
Yeah, and then we we raged pretty good that night that day those fun. Yeah
Yeah, that was a fun night
All right, anyone like I was like I asked the bomb, you want to do cocaine back when I was still doing
it?
And Savon's like, I don't do that anymore.
I don't even remember that.
So many people have offered to do cocaine with me.
I don't even remember.
I was like, let's do cocaine.
It was hilarious.
This was like 10 years ago.
Yeah, that was a cool place.
That was, I had a lot of fun that day. Yeah, that was a cool place. I had a lot of fun that day.
Yeah, that was a lot of fun.
Your shadow ban pretty bad.
It's hard to find your account.
You have to like basically type in your whole name.
Yeah, I've been shadow banned for a while.
It was like when the whole fucking,
the scamdemic started and I like literally
was on my profile saying like, you just have to eat healthy and
Exercise and then I started getting shadow banned
from anything bad about Tony Fauci I
Didn't call anyone out at the time now I am
But when my and when my big account got taken from me you connected me with some fucking hackers in Argentina and they got my account back for 1300 bucks.
Yeah, they fucking, they got my account back too. My account has been taken down three times so the first two times I got it back myself.
Like just submitting something to Instagram. But the third time that hacker reached out to me and I fucking paid him to get it back
But I don't know. Oh he reached out to you. Yeah
Is that weird? Yeah, that means he knows someone on the inside right and they're in there and they're basically that's their business
They know someone on the inside when someone has a big account that gets hacked
They know that or not hacked a band. They know that they'd be more willing to pay money
Probably but yeah, it's fucking shady the whole
That's why i'm happy trump's president like this the censorship was just getting worse and worse. It's like
Like you're saying like people don't notice it until like you're like putting content out and it happens to you
And it's happened to me like multiple times
that's why I'm like
Huh ever for your other content like showing in an Apple or something like that or or a lip slipper
It's like not even that it says when they take my post down my my backup account One of my backup accounts got taken down and it says for talking about substances
I was talking about mushrooms and guns and And they took down my backup account.
And I'm like, oh, well, fuck it.
I'm not going to try to get that back.
I'm like so tired, like fighting with them.
That was recently, right?
Yeah, that was like a few weeks ago.
They took it down.
I was talking about mushrooms and guns and they took it down.
It's not from like my tits or any of my videos in the bikini.
It's for me talking about mushrooms and guns
No, it sounds like the hacker stole the account credentials reached out to her to get payment and then just sent credentials back to her I don't think so
Because they were when she put me in contact with them
They were able to get my account back and they didn't know who I was. Yeah
account back and they didn't know who I was yeah it's a just so shady it's like like the Hollywood business how they're all like fucking kids they're fucking
weird as shit the Hollywood people yeah the Hollywood people not the comedians
the Hollywood people like the people in Hollywood like they're all fucking weird
there's probably some comedians that are kid fuckers
Jimmy Kimmel, maybe
All right, so we have we have three contestants we have a Bill Clinton no no five contestants a Bill Clinton
Tony the Asian, naked Heidi.
Naked Heidi.
And we have the best contestant.
And we have, and we have big, and we have big Baca.
All right.
No decisions we need to be, no decisions need to be made tonight.
68 minutes for contestants Heidi how do you feel about your chances pretty good to be honest I
do feel pretty good about it just because I just feel like we'd be a good
girl duo can sleep naked together I'm going to rate you or be weird. You know, I'm chill. Whatever you got to do. I support
I feel like the vibes coming off those other dudes. I don't want to put them down
I think they're great and I would watch that dude's parents if need be but
Not the best I don't think
I am a little disappointed in the rest of the chat for not trying harder, but whatever
Yeah, are they saying anything I'm not even I don't even see a chat I think there'll be some special um
I think there'll be some special
I
Think the trip will be better than people can imagine. Let me just say that yeah
I think people don't really understand
how crazy this trip is gonna be.
Yeah, it's gonna be, there's gonna be some surprises.
Yeah.
Ooh.
Yeah, it's gonna be fucking-
Sweet as a pot, all right.
Like, it's gonna be an unforgettable trip.
That's all I have to say.
Yeah. So. Well, listen well listen Seth you got my information, you know
So you just let me know. All right
Okay. All right. Thank you. Bye. Love you. Bye
Love you. Bye. Hey, let me call you back. I'm finishing up a show. All right.
That's pretty good.
I wish I could tell you we had 50 people call in, but I'm pretty happy with that.
I honestly didn't think one person would call in.
I thought we would just sit here and get to know you.
That would be so horrible. No one called in. I
Mean, it's a say it's just listen. It's the same
250 people who watch the show every day
They're terrified to call in because then everyone would know that they
Listen everyone in the in the chats like holy fuck. I would give my left arm to go to Austin with her
Are they saying I'm not I don't even read the chat. I don't even
see it.
But we're all kind of a family here. So like if they call in,
you know, it's like, you know, they called in Oh, who's this?
Someone's texting me on my real phone.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
All right, thank you
Thank you
And if we if we need to I know that time is of the essence, but if we need to do another one
We can do another one
Yeah, we should probably do another one probably within a week or so, okay
It's 29th. What day is it? It's a few weeks away. Do you want to do another one tomorrow night?
Tomorrow night? I mean, I'm supposed to go on a date tomorrow night.
But I could reschedule it.
No, no, maybe that date's the guy you're gonna take. Call or hi.
Hey, let me just set the record straight here. I'm not a pussy, okay?
Alright, cool. Oh, I know you're not
a pussy. All right. So, so watch your words. I got my kids, bro. Like if I can, if you give me a nanny.
Oh, I said everyone. Yeah, you're all pussies. All right. Okay. Sorry. You're right. Yeah, you did get
lumped up in that. Sorry. I did call you pussies. I'm gonna smack you the next time I see you. Fair enough.
Fair enough. You get a nanny, you get someone to watch the kiddos.
They're actually pretty cool. They're no trouble at all. We would have the time of our lives.
Promise. Hi kids, meet Auntie Kaylee. Boom. They're not gonna have a problem with me being naked at
the Airbnb? No, I tell them blindfolds go in the other room. Oh good, daddy's got
something to take care of. We're good to go. Big Baka, maybe I'll make them a brother or
sister. Sebi, tell her to cancel her date. I'll win her heart when we meet. Wow. Damn,
Big Baka is going hard. Should I cancel my date? You should do a poll if I should cancel my date tomorrow or not I would I don't
How to do that I need K. Oh, I don't know how to do
You got a lot of dates Kim well, it's my friend's friend my best friend's friend
so
Wait, are you still there Jeremy? Oh?
We lost oh we lost him. I don't know what happened
It might have been when oh might have been something having to do with Heidi being on the phone, too
Oh, she's still on the phone. No she got she got oh here. He is
Hey, sorry about that. I don't know what happened. Go ahead. You said you should go on a lot
of dates. Yeah. No, I don't. It's funny. The last relationship I was with in, he was a
photographer and he was like, one of my favorite photographers, that's his best friend. And
the only reason why like we were in a relationship is that he I was telling him about my
Trip to Texas and then I say I watch kill Tony and he said he watches it too
So he's been writing jokes for a year and I'm like, oh so then that's why I wanted to bring him with me
Because none of my girlfriends watch kill Tony
So then and then we just ended up in a relationship, so I don't know I just like jump into relationships
I don't really date I go on like one date and we're in a relationship basically
Really yeah
I usually break up with the dudes so why?
Cuz
Like I don't know I get bored.
What like marriage?
Huh?
What kids? Marriage?
Yeah I want kids and marriage but I just want more like he was sleeping in he was doing
cocaine and all that stuff and I don't want that. So it's like I've been in a relationship
for like a decade long enough to know when it's like time to leave and I know what I want and I'm like I'm like pushing 40 now I'm like I need I know what I want and I'm not gonna fucking deal with that you either get your shit together or like I want him to fucking apologize.
We were supposed to have a call yesterday and he didn't even call me. He's in Vegas. So now I'm here.
Hey, I like this voice. You have a very sexy voice at all times, Jeremy, but this is like your real sexy voice tonight.
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait. Sorry, I lost you. Say it. What? Shit. I don't know what's going on with my phone. Say that again.
Can you hear me? Yeah. Say that again.
I said because it's midnight. I'm like extra sexy at night. Yeah. It's midnight. Can you hear me? Yeah. Say that again. I said because it's midnight.
I'm like extra sexy at night.
Yeah.
It's midnight.
Where are you at?
What do you like to do at 6 PM usually?
6 PM shit.
Working out.
You know.
Are you flexible with your schedule?
That kind of stuff.
I'm flexible, but I'm telling you, dude, if I tell my kids,
hey, our New Year's plans are thwarted
because this super hot babe wants to take me to Texas I mean I don't know if they'll
forgive me what do you think?
Oh they'll forgive you you have to pay for your ticket and then everything else and pay
for the ticket and drinks and then everything else is set up the Airbnb the front row tickets
all that other shit.
Okay.
If you say so, you think they'll forgive me.
I'll do it.
Enter me in. Let's go show her my Instagram.
It'll be game over.
Yeah.
I look better than Mike.
Yeah.
He's a maniac.
Crossfitter.
He's a maniac.
Crossfitter.
That felt bad for the kids.
No, they'll be fine.
That'd be good. I'll get him something cool and I get back big Baca's willing to ditch the parents
You're willing to ditch the kids
Heidi's willing to sleep naked in bed and
Jeremy Jeremy are you willing to sleep naked in the bed? Oh
Only the girls, that's the thing. Oh, oh, oh, only the girls, sorry.
I was gonna say no anyways. Oh shit, look at Ken, look at Ken.
Look at Ken Walters, Jeremy, if you win,
I have some Delta miles.
What a fucking team effort.
I'm telling you, we are family here.
We are family here on the 7-on podcast.
What a family show, Ken, I love you, man.
If I hadn't told you that, you're a good dude.
Look at that standee, I'll chip in some Delta miles.
Jesus, crying me.
Oh, so if I said I'm naked right now too,
does that get me ahead of Heidi?
Or if I talk like Heidi, does that get me ahead of Heidi?
How do I get ahead of Heidi?
No, no, no.
Oh, don't you know there a
I'm like a 45 minute drive from Heidi to be honest with you. I mean can have you and Heidi ever got together?
At the games we all hung out, but no, but I don't think how he likes me
She does not like me you ever put the D? So you never put the D to her? She does not like me.
I thought you were going to say she doesn't like the D.
I mean, maybe, maybe. I mean, her boyfriend moved to Alaska or something.
Hey, you're a lot of man. Maybe she's just attracted to you and she just like, she has to put up that guard just to, so she doesn't like start swooning.
Why don't we call her real quick, get her back on.
We'll ask her.
And you guys work it out?
No, not this show.
Yeah.
All right.
All right, well, let me know what I gotta do
to get ahead of Heidi.
We'll make it happen.
We'll have a fun time.
All right.
All right, thanks, Jeremy.
Thank you.
Fantastic call. Thank you.
Peace out. Peace. All these dudes with, Jeremy. Thank you. Fantastic.
Thank you.
Wow.
Peace out.
Peace.
All these dudes with great bodies.
Have a second call in and have all the callers call back in for a final show and have Kaylee
ask us more questions and she picks the winner on the live show.
Here's the thing, man.
Jeremy was asking the questions and I think I could, Heidi was like, Oh shit.
This is probably a Mexican dude.
This is from Oxnard.
Hey, what's up, man?
Hey. I'm going in to vote for my boy Jeremy.
I got $50 on the drinks for him.
Wow!
Hey, dude, why don't you go?
She loves photographers.
I care.
Why not?
Oh, I'm busy that week.
What are you talking about?
You can make a whole, it would be awesome.
You can make a whole video of it.
Going with Kaylee to see Tony.
I would. I really thought about that, actually. Hey, dude, if anyone's gonna get backstage, it's gonna be Kaylee. Oh
100% she's gonna get backstage. Yeah, I rather have my boy Jeremy get after it. All right. Damn
Yeah, I'll put a put a solid hundo for all the drinks
All right, and if you need a photographer or videographer, I couldn't recommend anyone better than this guy Jonathan Ortega
Yeah
All right. So Delta miles and drinks come with Jeremy done
Yeah easy. All right. I
Kaylee takes 50 $50 whiskey shots. So that's one shot
12 years scotch. All right whiskey shots. So that's one shot. I like Scott McCallin. McCallin. Yeah, I drink a lot.
12 year Scotch.
All right.
12 year Scotch is like $90 two finger pour.
Wow. We're going to have to do a fundraiser.
Whoever goes, we should do a fundraiser show.
They're going to spend like a grand on the drinks.
Okay. All right.
All right. Thank you.
All right. Peace. Thank you All right, please
Wow, I
Feel the love tonight
Like the Lion King yeah, Moana 2 is out Moana Moana Moana 2 I can't wait to take my kids to go see it oh
I haven't seen the first one
Yeah, the first one's great all the singing is great in it
I like I like the soundtrack and Moana and frozen
The soundtracks are always great. I cry would there's one song in the frozen soundtrack that makes me cry. Call her
Hi, it's Brianna. Oh Brianna. Yeah. Yes. Hi Wow. This would be crazy to take Brianna
Wow, this would be crazy to take Brianna.
Yeah, so I guess my pitch to take myself would be I'm also from California, so I could all I would be totally down to meet you before we go.
Oh, where are you from?
I'm from Temecula, like in Riverside.
Okay, but I would like country. my pitch. I also do CrossFit, also CrossFit girl.
So I'd love to work out with you.
Do you do comedy?
Do you do comedy?
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy.
I do comedy. I do comedy. I do comedy.'s my bitch. I also do CrossFit also CrossFit girl. So I do I'd love to work out with you
Do you do comedy do you know any jokes?
Um, I feel like I have one corny joke that I actually heard recently, but it's not very good
Let's hear it
What kind of what kind of bee produces milk
What kind be a bad
That's cute corny. Yeah. Yeah, I like that. But yeah
But I am a comedy fan, but like I haven't been watching the new comedians
But growing up I watched a lot of like Tosh point Oh Chappelle shows
Oh, I do appreciate good comedy God Tosh is outstanding
I know I love my song in person. Yeah, where did you see him in person? I saw him in person too
It was fucking crazy
So good. I saw him at Pachanga and Temecula. Oh, I saw him in Palm Springs
You know, it's crazy
Everyone who opened up for him was better than him and I still thought he was the best because he had just such like
He had such aura. He had such star power. Yeah, I was like swooning his presence. Oh my god. He was so good
such star power. I was like swooning his presence. Oh my god he was so good. Yeah that's why like you have to see comedians live because some of them are like way better in person.
Hey I just- that aura. Her her her her booby joke just made me think of it like a bit you could do.
Me? Yeah the ratio of times a guy spend time with uh their face in your tits versus your face in your
crotch I think there's a good bit there. Yeah, there's like a good I think there's a good
bit there you can write that joke for me. Okay, I will. It can be it's gonna be like
a whole minute but but but but it'll be good because it'll be because it'll draw a lot
of attention to your tits but then talk about eating beaver and the guys in the audience
will just be like freaking out.
Yeah, write that down.
Okay.
Yeah, before you freak out.
Yeah, this is good.
This is good material, Sevan.
Yeah, that would be a good bit.
That would be a great bit.
No, Sevan, what are you talking about?
No, you don't think that's a good bit?
Like you do, there's some great joke around there
about as soon as they get with me,
they just want to spend too much time on their titties
But really what they got to do is you got a heads up. What the fuck are you guys talking about?
Danny go worry. What the fuck? This is my show. You're supposed to support me. Hey, Brianna's got mad pimping skills. I
Believe it. How old are you?
23 oh your baby. Oh, you're a baby.
Oh my God.
I know.
Where were you this weekend, Brianna?
I was at the Chiefs game.
Oh shit.
How was that?
I'm a new fan fan of the Chiefs.
Are you dating one of the chiefs I'm seeing what I do we're not nothing official nothing
set in stone but I'm seeing one of the ass you mean you've seen one you've seen
him yes did he have Perone's
Yes. No, they're seeing each other.
Did he have peronies?
Lady never tells.
Good answer.
All right, fuck, throw Brianna in there.
I approve of all of you.
I don't want to take up the phone,
because I feel like there's a lot of people
that want to call in.
So I'll leave it.
I'll leave it open.
I just wanted to remind you in the midst.
Dude, listen.
I mean, these are some good people.
I still like Tony the Asian. I like Big Baka. I think Heidi and Rihanna are at the top.
I love Heidi.
I love Jeremy.
I love Rihanna.
I know these are good.
These are, this is turning out way better than I thought.
Oh my God.
He had bad expectations.
Wow.
All right.
All right.
Well, it was nice to meet you.
I think this was a great show despite the haters, but.
Oh, the haters.
You know why they're hating. You know why they're hating. Oh, it's nice to meet you. I think this is a great show despite the haters But oh the haters, you know why they're hating you know why they're hating. Oh
For sure. They do this with me. They do this is Heidi to do all the girls anyway
And they just want to fucking get they just want to eat a bowl cereal out of her ass
It's like it's like shut the fuck up. Like I know what you're thinking
All right. Thank you, Brianna
Bye
All right. Thank you, Brianna.
Bye.
Bye.
Sammy, go back to the hilarious joke.
Your workshopping.
Thank you, Trish.
Thank you.
Yeah, I want to know that joke.
I have to work it, but there is something there.
Good premise.
Yeah, it's a great premise because as soon as you mention your boobs, you're going to
give the audience permission to ogle you and then you can just work them
But you got it, but once you have their attention you got to like we got to like keep them, dude
I might wear this I might wear this cuz then I have paces on and if I take it off
I'm like if I if I bomb I'm gonna pull a Bert Kreischer and take off my shirt
Wow, and then paste
Wow
And then I should get like kill Tony kill Tony
on the pasties. You could do a layered thing too. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like we're
like three shirts and like take take one off take one off so you keep seeing a little bit
more and more until it's just like, hey, what's up, dude? Hey, dude, we should definitely
get the fucking exercise or to sponsor this this show how fucking hilarious
Yeah, the whole bitch she can even start it be like
Like Kaylee's here tonight because she was sponsored by a penis pump and brought this date with her
Like it's a whole entire fucking bit in and of itself
So like you build the bit as you go to the show And then the bit is at the show. Wow.
Right.
Do you know about the exercises?
Kaylee?
Yeah.
Yeah.
The suction cup on it and you put it right on here and you pump it a few times and,
um, and it hears like, but you can't get your balls in it and then it adheres to
it and then it like increases blood flow in the penis in 15 minutes
a day supposedly gives you an adds an inch of length and an inch of girth. Yeah and all we
got to do is get you holding a few of them and take a few shots and we get a few thousand bucks
for sure. Me holding them? Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no no you're banked into the deal sorry
you don't read the contract yeah you don't send it to the contract yeah for sure you get paid for
that yeah yeah yeah she goes up there on stage and just starts throwing exercises these are not exactly
Yeah, well same same same same same yeah
exercise
hitting people in the head with it
Here put this on your head we get you a fucking we'll get you a giant bra as a slingshot Wow
You should oh you should make um fucking pasties that say like the saffon podcast on it Wow
You know what you know what else is a great
You know what else is a great move too instead of like showing boob
That really gets guys riled up is take off your bra under your shirt
Cuz that really gets I know you just put one on so you can take one off, you know, it's just it's just a prop
It's just a prop. Yeah, obviously you don't wear bras
I wear sports bras. Yeah.
All right.
Great job.
You're a great business mind, Susie.
You're a great business mind.
Thank you.
Yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
We'll turn a profit on this.
All right.
Bye.
Thank you.
All right.
All right.
Jonathan would like to you to make a guest appearance on the kill Taylor show
Would you like to sit on the panel for kill Taylor and just?
Okay this Saturday, I actually oh I shouldn't say it I
Forwarded like clips of the show to Tony. Oh for kill Taylor. Thank you. That's very kind to you. Yeah
No wonder we got a letter from the lawyers of her cease and desist.
I told them not to do that.
Savvy, keep the show going. I got a friend about texting. Okay. Do you have,
do you have more time, uh, Kaylee?
Oh hell yeah. I got all night.
Okay. Uh, remember, uh, there's affiliates out there that are getting people
healthy, uh, take a quick pee break and we'll be back in, uh, 90 seconds.
healthy, take a quick pee break and we'll be back in 90 seconds. My experience was that you build one in Portland and I'll start. Coming from a bad back, not really
able to move, doctors said medication probably until you can't take it then we'll do surgery So that was kind of what motivated me to get into it. So a year into CrossFit
Probably one of the best best shape of my life. It's diagnosed with cancer
We got through it.
You push through these things that I always joked. I was like, okay, here we go through it.
What was it, 35 rounds of radiation, 3 rounds of chemo.
I said, here we go, 3, 2, 1, go.
It's like a workout. Let's get through it, you know. There's no doubt. I've been in oncology, radiation oncology for 30,
over 30 years. With what he was up against, there's no doubt in my mind if it wouldn't have been for
CrossFit and the way he was, we built him up and how strong he was he wouldn't he wouldn't be here today.
Don't eat sugar, eat meat, exercise daily. And if you'd like to have the world's worst case of blue balls, this trip is for you. Or if you're a great wingman girl, or if you're gay, you also can enter,
anyone can enter. All you have to do is fly yourself to San Francisco or to
Austin and then get to Austin Airbnb paid for front row tickets to monster
stadium show with kill Tony mothership show some other comedy club show. Yeah.
Lots of edging, lots of edging lots of edging
Wow Okay
Do you have a like a day job somewhere like do you work it like like are you substitute teacher or work at a 7-eleven?
Or work at a bank or anything? I've had a lot of jobs, but I make my money from Oli fans now. I made like six figures from it, basically.
So I do that and I work out and that's why it would be perfect for me just to move to Texas and
get into comedy because I already have fuck you money like money that
Yeah, I could do whatever the fuck I want now But and you know and you don't have any um of vices really like you're not you don't buy expensive cars or jewelry or any
Don't like you know
Material things that's why like I can't have people sponsor me. I always get emails
Like a lot of agencies have tried to get me but like literally like a few years ago
I told them I wanted to talk
about politics and they and I want to be the next Joe Rogan they told me I can't do that
as a woman and you know now like my my most engagement that I get on my Instagram videos
are me fucking doing rants about politics and that's why like people are reaching out
to me now and I'm like they literally said I couldn't do that
And yeah, a lot of agencies are like that if you have an agency if you have any kind of sponsorship
That's why I don't like being sponsored by anything. You can't say stuff
Yeah, cuz then you're gonna offend like if you offend someone then it goes back to the brand that you're
Representing so it's like I don't want to be like associated with any
of that. I've had sponsorships before and I'm like happy like now that I have money
where I could like just say what I could say and I don't need like a brand sponsoring
me. That's what I prefer. Especially I'm a carnivore. Like who what like just eat meat
like real food. What am I going do, have a fucking protein powder?
I don't think so.
Unless I'm like the liver king and selling desiccated like capsules.
So you go on political rants on your IG?
Yeah.
In the story or in the posts?
It's funny because I, when I look at my Instagram, what I post and I look at somebody who just
subscribed to my page that I was looking at the same thing and it doesn't show everything I post.
So there's like a lot of stuff that I'm posting that no one's seeing when you even look at it.
It's really hard. It's really hard to find your account and you and I follow you and you never you never show up in my feed ever.
Yeah, it's fucking crazy. I go on a lot of political rants.
Oh, look at this.
Brianna will do an OnlyFans collab with you.
Wow.
Okay, I'm down for that.
I don't show a lot.
I show my tits, so.
The nipple and everything.
Huh?
The nipple and everything.
Yeah, cause I'm all about, it was like even on Instagram, when I started my Instagram, I'm all about free the nipple and everything. Huh? The nipple and everything. Yeah, because I'm all about, it was like even on Instagram, when I started my Instagram,
I'm all about free the nipple.
If men can show their nipples, why can't women show their nipples?
Now it's like they found a loophole through like breastfeeding videos.
Yeah.
So I'm like, why can't these breastfeeding women show their nipples, but like women can
show their fucking nipples?
That's why I started my Only only fans. It's so fucking crazy
I have this I have this great idea for your only fans. I
Can't share it here, but it's a I think it's fucking brilliant
Yeah, I have another brilliant idea for you too, you just got to find the right videographer
Yeah, I sent you I sent you a clip of some girl in Asia doing it now, right? No, I don't. I don't know where she walks through the crowd.
You never see her face.
You just see her back and she walks through crowds topless and you just see people's reactions.
Oh, yeah. You told me about that.
Yeah, it's my my ex at the time to do it at Target and he's like, I don't feel comfortable doing that.
So I just wore like I have this like Trump.
What the fuck did he say?
He's a photographer. He's a photographer. I asked my ex at the time to do it at Target and he's like I don't feel comfortable doing that
So I just wore like I have this like Trump. What the fuck did he say? He's a photographer
He should be comfort. He does coke and he hangs out with libtards
So you should totally be comfortable doing it. I have a sweater that basically it's like this like daddy's helmet Trump on it
Yeah. Oh, wow
Right. Where did you get that?
Wow Oh, wow. Right? Where did you get that? On TikTok. Wow. But they banned me off of TikTok like nine times.
I can't even get on now,
but I got a bunch of like Trump shit on TikTok.
But I have a sweater like this
and I was walking around Target
and I told him to film me.
And I was like, what if I just like flash people,
like what you were saying?
And he was like, I don't feel comfortable doing that.
I was like, oh. Hey Ortega, here's my idea. There was a guy there was a guy listen this idea. I'm a videographer
Here's my here's my idea for I think I'll kill there was a guy on eBay when I was younger and he he sold the two
He sold like a paperclip on eBay and then he traded it for something bigger and bigger and bigger and eventually he got a house
And then he traded it for something bigger and bigger and bigger and eventually he got a house
And my idea is you never see Kaylee's face you never see her tits or nothing
but she she goes into like a liquor store and
She she goes hey I don't have money for this pack of gum and the guys like we can't have it and then you just see her open
Or trench coat and you see the guy's face. He's like fine
You can have it and you just do that in different stores and see what she can get away with.
You go to a toilet dealership.
She's like, I want a Tundra.
And I'm telling you, it would be no one's done it.
There'd be shitloads of copycats once he started, but it would be
it would be the craziest fucking Instagram account.
It would be it would go wild.
That's a cool trick. But I don't know.
I want to talk just because you can talk to on a different one
This one's just not even your face or nothing
This one is just because when people see your like if you go in there and you're all buttoned up and you have your hair
Up or something, then you pull those things out the expressions on people's faces is gonna be
It's gonna be crazy
and
Then you can take all those things that you get for free and put them on eBay and
And then you can take all those things that you get for free and put them on eBay
and Sell them and people will want them. That's from that show. I'm telling you it's fucking
Buddy, I was telling my ex to sell my like old lingerie and
Bikinis like I gave him I told him I would give him 50% if he just like I gave him the merchandise and everything
And he didn't even run with it and I was like, dude
He's just like sleeping in and shit. I have like thousands of dollars
Thousands of bikinis like hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of bikinis everywhere
It's fucking crazy. Look the X again. Yeah, you need you need them. That's has to be motivated. Maybe your ex needs to be gay
Brilliant thank you Trish. It is but I mean I have a lot of X's to use so you don't even know which one I'm talking about
All right
so
Wow, we made we made it in another 40 minutes since the last time I'm gonna call in again. I
Think so. I'm gonna tell like they said to wait or. Yeah, big big Baca said that someone was gonna call him
But I don't think he is. Oh
We can talk X's together
John Wooley's gonna call it. Oh
No, big Baca says no my friends are pussies. Yeah, I mean you gotta have a pretty big set of balls to call into
This show I think
Yeah, I was scared to do this and now like I know everyone's talking shit about me online. I can call again
If you'd like to be aroused again, well, are you gonna like you shouldn't call in the video chat. Is he naked?
Maybe I'd be curious to see Jeremy naked.
Just put like a towel over yourself or something.
Remember who called in first? Yeah, Tony, Tony the Asian.
Tony the Asian.
But everyone has to, you know, you gotta, we gotta remember we have Heidi with the voice,
Brianna, the Kansas City girl Bill Clinton
Yeah, you do you have all their information? Yeah, I got I mean I would be down to me Tony since he lives here
I mean he doesn't live here. He works here. Yeah, like this week to see how he is. Oh
That's good, did you hear, pool boy? That's good.
Yeah, I would like go out with him this week. I wish someone, I wish someone like 70 would call.
75 or 80, yeah.
Yeah, I usually date older dudes. I'm 35 if anyone knows and I like older guys.
So I like guys in like their 40s and 50s there you go with a job
All right guys what will uh, uh Kaylee and I will schedule another show
I appreciate all you guys. Love you guys. Thank you so much
All of you except Cole
Yeah, fuck you Cole. Yeah, everyone else was great. Fuck you in the ass. Oh boy. You're king Heidi. You're queen and
Briana Queen
Briana's Queen. Yeah, my boy. I'll set it up. I hope you like handsome jackdudes with massive hogs
Dude, I need a wingman
Handsome jackdudes with massive hogs
Dude, I need a wingman
Oh shit now we're in trouble the fucking yard duties calling hello
Are we in trouble
Hey Jeff
Jeff hello. Hey, are we in trouble my trouble for the show?
No, no, no, you're good. All right. All right. I'm just me and you know, you wanted the 70 year old to call in
Listen aren't you married?
Yes, I'm married I think you have to turn the YouTube off. You are 70, aren't you?
Sorry.
Hey, listen, do you have any fatherly advice for Kaylee?
Full props to Heidi.
So you endorse Heidi as a as a as a I endorse Heidi as the go-to wing
We should do a poll on the next show and like have all the yeah, we'll get Caleb here
Yeah, Jeff, if you saw if you saw Kaylee's tits live, would you have a heart attack?
Probably yeah me too
I'd have to be wearing my Apple watch.
But as the only true Texan that is called in.
Yes. Oh. Do you need any advice for Texas?
Oh, are you in Austin?
Well, I lived in Austin for a long time, but...
All right.
...or Pflugerville right outside of Austin.
I'll give her your phone number when she goes there in case she goes to jail she can call
you.
Me?
Go to jail for punching a bitch in the face?
I'm sure Mr. Birch would appreciate that.
All right.
Look at, Heidi gave you a heart.
Papa Birch heart.
All right brother, love you.
Hey man, Vena.
Hey, I love you too.
Joe brother. Thank you. All right, brother love you, man, you know Hey, I love you too Joe brother. Thank you
All right shit. It's fucking family affair tonight
Okay, here we go who's that we have a fucking another another contestant oh
Someone grew some balls. Yeah. Oh, well, let me get this link going.
God, technology is amazing.
The fact that I can do this show and then go watch Dexter with my wife in the next 10
minutes is crazy.
I don't even know why you're watching that.
The new one?
No. Well, I'm going to watch the new one with Andrew. I'm watching the new one. No. Well, I'm gonna watch the new one with Andrew
I'm watching the new one and hey, you know, it's I can't remember who to a pool boy text me today and he's like
Hey, I've been watching Dexter. I'm on season 2 the shits. Give me anxiety
I'm so happy you said that the old one the show gives me so much fucking anxiety
Yeah, but did it does give you anxiety? No, I love serial killers
Does give you anxiety? No, I love serial killers
Man I read the book about like Ted Bundy like I read books about him. I'm like into that shit
Wow It makes like life feel like less scary
You don't mind punching a loved one
Me yeah, I mean well
one. Me? Yeah. I mean, well, if they're into it, I always like ask dudes if they're into it. I've punched like seven guys on dates, but I always ask them before I do it. Wow.
Like if it's okay. And if they say it's okay, then I'm going to do it. Have you ever drawn
blood? No, I don't punch him that hard. I'm you ever knocked like small hands you ever knocked out a tooth
Oh, yeah, you have nice hands. I've knocked out my own tooth. Oh shit wise
Like Jeremy's like maybe I don't want to go anymore
Yeah, exactly
I'm suspicious of anyone who gets unnerved by Dexter dude. This show is so stressful. Hey, I tried to watch you
So you like that guy Michael C. Hall?
Yeah, I like him a lot. I really like you looking at him. I love the close-ups of his face
I was telling my wife that I love looking at him. He's like my favorite part of the show
He was in that show with them. I like Lila to oh
He was
No, no, I don't know if that was the show he was on the show with um
Was it a comedy? It was like a fucking comedy show, but it was like a series
But it was like super old and then like my ex Jason that you know
I'm sorry. I'm talking about my ex again, but he knows my ex Jason like he made me watch it and
What the fuck was it? It was with another Michael Michael Sarah
Michael Sarah and Michael C. Hall. Can you look that up? What show was that?
It was a great show. You should watch that show my amazing
Sarah Michael C. Hall I like the
Michael Sarah, let me see. How long did Michael Cera and Aubrey day Michael C Hall?
I don't see Michael.
I don't see it.
Maybe I'm spelling Michael Cera wrong.
Am I spelling Michael Cera wrong?
I can't even find it either.
What was that?
Oh, is he?
He's a Canadian actor.
Oh, he's that comedian. He's that? Oh, is he he's a Canadian actor. Oh
He's that comedian. He's that comedian Michael. Sarah. Yeah, he was he in like Portlandia or something. Yeah, what's it in Arrested Development?
Hmm Listen that show it's what another big famous dude
What was I'd have to go to reddit all the links are coming in from reddit
I can't go to reddit
There's another big dude. I think that was he was like a kid star and then he got big I forgot his name, too
What the fuck was his name Michael Sarah's so hot no shit you think there is hot that?
Brianna I want to be on your arm your fucking movie TV review show. I know a lot about movies and TV shows
Have you ever been to Comic-Con no, I've been to WrestleMania oh
Jason Bateman oh, he's great. Yeah Arrested Development
Michael Sarah was on there Jason Bateman is I think Jason Bateman is up there with Denzel Washington and Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah, it was Arrested Development, but why isn't his name on it?
Am I thinking of something else? Am I just like fucking tripping right now?
Maybe it was a different show.
I don't know.
What was the- the what?
Arrested Development's a great show starring Jason Bateman and Michael Ceres on there.
But there was another show with Michael C C Hall but I can't I thought that was it at what he has a
nice body too which one who Michael C Hall he's a good looking dude is he like
bi he seems gay to me cuz he played a like a gay role in one of these shows
that's what I was thinking of he's very very, he looks like, he's almost, he's like too clean looking.
I can't figure it out.
But yeah, I did, I watched Dexter and I loved it, the original one.
Oh, Six Feet Under!
Have you seen Six Feet Under?
No, Michael C. Hall was in that.
Yeah, so Michael C. Hall starred in Six Feet Under and he played a gay man.
And it was amazing. He's a great fucking actor.
And was Michael Cera in that?
No, I was getting shit mixed up.
So Michael Cera was with Jason Bateman on Arrested Development.
I don't know why I got them mixed up.
Maybe he did like a cameo or something. I don't know or maybe just because their names sound the same
It was like fucking tripping
But yeah, Six Feet Under was a great show and Michael C. Hall was in there and he played a gay actor
That's why I was thinking of that because you're watching Vexer. Oh, yeah, it says emotionally
He was emotionally repressed and conflicted about his homosexuality. That was his character
Yeah, a conservative homo was his character. Yeah.
A conservative homo he played.
Yeah! It was amazing! It's like fucking Tim Dillon. He's a conservative homo.
What did you say? A what villain?
Tim Dillon.
Oh, who's that?
Tim Dillon, the fucking comedian.
Oh, he's gay?
Yeah, I think he's gay and he's conservative that's why
it's like and he goes on these like political rants that's why it's like so
interesting. Oh he's the fat guy. Yeah. Tim Dylan is gay and came out at the age of 25 he
struggled with substance abuse in his past I think his podcast is huge
right? It is he's he goes on political rants. It's fucking amazing
That's why like me wearing a bikini and going on political rants. I knew it would get attention
I get the most engagement on that because it's like who does this and going on conservative political rants
It's just like super entertaining to watch. Oh, he's been on Rogan too. He's got
900,000 followers. Yeah. Yeah, he's good.
He's funny. Oh, here he is with JD Vance on. What do you think about JD Vance? I love him.
Yeah, he's funny. I love how with the Vaughn how the Vaughn brought up cocaine and he was
just laughing. Like I should use that like oh no that was
Trump he brought that up to Trump. He no he brought it up to both of them. Oh he did. Oh wow. Yeah
Yeah, you definitely you definitely need to come on the kill Taylor show
Yeah, come on like just to talk just hang out. Well what happens is is people work out
Just hang out. Well, what happens is people work out.
Kayla does work out.
Oh, OK. Yeah. And then we just rip on people.
People call in and we just rip on them.
You just have to talk shit about them.
We just, you know, we just talk shit about them.
Tell them it looks like a small dick or a big fat ass or they pull up, suck,
or we just rip on them.
Yeah. Bring me into your boys group.
I'll be the only girl. All right.
Because you're Tom, because you're Tom because you're
a tomboy yeah I'm basically a boy all these dudes I hang out with are like
hardcore Christian dudes too I wonder if they'll be freaked out by you if you
show cleavage probably oh Jeremy world I come on the kill Taylor show every week. Wow. I always wondered how many people came on it.
That's funny. Fucking um, what's his name? Um, Taylor self is hilarious.
He's so funny. He is funny, right? Yeah. It all makes sense. Like the stereotypes are true. Like comedians, they just come up like no fathers,
or they have like a drug abuse problem or a bunch of shit all of that is true
Are you abuse as a child? Oh?
Taylor had a great joke that you could steal for kill kill Tony
What you could work it you could be like yeah, I found out my boyfriend was gay
He was cruising my only fans account and someone had sent me a dick pic and I saw him trying to put the phone in his mouth
account and someone had sent me a dick pic and I saw him trying to put the phone in his mouth because Taylor said he sent someone a funny we have to work
it a little bit but Taylor said that he sent someone he's like that dude so gay
I sent him a dick pic and he tried to put his phone in his his phone in his
mouth I was like wow that's strong yeah that good. Look at Heidi's like, no. All right, fine.
No, no.
What?
No.
What?
Big Baka.
I beat Taylor on the dumbbell bench row workout on kill Taylor for your information.
I hope that impresses.
I can't really.
Yeah, that's impressive.
Oh, he was on and he beat Taylor.
Well, I don't know if he was on the show,
but he says he did the workout.
I don't remember him being on the show.
Everyone says they can beat Taylor.
That's funny.
All right, I gotta go.
I gotta go watch the Dexter.
I can smell the steak my wife's cooking me.
Okay.
Oh wait, who's gonna call in? Nobody's calling in?
Yeah, I don't think he's calling in. He pushed out.
Okay.
It says Big Baka sent me a sent him a link. He's not he's not he's not.
All right. Hey, thank you so much. Great show. I have the list of names.
I'll text you first thing in the morning at 6 a.m.
to schedule another show sometime.
Very soon.
You were wonderful.
I don't know what took me four or five years
to have you on.
I told you, well I told you I would do a podcast
if we were live in person.
Yeah, we should start a dating show.
I wanted to do one with Daniel Brandon.
I think he'd be perfect.
I told you! Yeah. I've. I think he'd be perfect. I told you.
Yeah.
I've been telling you I'd do it.
Yeah.
I could get famous hanging out with you.
Okay.
Yeah, you're so smart.
You're a great talker.
Oh, thank you.
I like that.
That's like the best compliment ever.
All right.
All right.
Thank you. And I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Ladies and gentlemen, Kaylee, go to Texas with her.
Talk to you soon, girl.
Bye.
Alright, I'm going off the phone and fucking the shit out of my wife right now.
Alright guys, I'll see you guys tomorrow morning, 7am Pacific Standard Time.
Great show. How amazing, oh baby beast, wow. All right, guys, I'll see you guys tomorrow morning 7 a.m. Pacific Standard Time great show
How amazing Oh Baby Beast Wow, she's a fucking rock star
You guys were great in the chat, by the way, you guys are absolutely great
Invited her into the living room with all of us. You guys were all gentlemen and gentle ladies. I really appreciate you guys
You guys were truly wonderful. Thank you. Jeffrey for calling in in. Heidi, Jeremy, love you guys so much. What a fun show.
Talk to you guys soon.
And yeah, 7 a.m.
How many hours is that?
Two, nine hours.
Crazy.
All right.
Have a good night.
PaperStreetCoffee, thanks for keeping me awake.
See you at peptides.com.
BirdFit.
Of course, The Exerciser. Paperstreet Coffee, thanks for keeping me awake. CAPeptides.com. BirdFit.
Of course, The Exerciser.
Talk to you guys soon. Bye bye.