The Tim Dillon Show - 251 - Dirty Little Animals

Episode Date: May 9, 2021

Tim is in a Miami hotel recording remotely with the great Ray Kump. They talk the monsters that populate clubhouse, the fallacies of crypto and dogecoin, and the new kind of billionaires. Follow Ray Kump: https://www.instagram.com/raykump/ https://twitter.com/RayKump https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCSTrfwH6lIcujHO5TDVqCA   Bonus Episodes every week: ▶▶ https://www.patreon.com/thetimdillonshow ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: 🩳 UNDERWEAR: Order with PROMO CODE Tim ▶▶ https://www.sheathunderwear.com/ 🔒 VPN: Get three months free ▶▶ https://www.expressvpn.com/timdillon 🥣 CEREAL: Use code TimDillon for free shipping! ▶▶ https://magicspoon.com/timdillon 🔵 BLUE CHEW : Use promo TD ▶▶ https://bluechew.com/ 🤖 MANSCAPED: Use code TIMD ▶▶ https://www.manscaped.com/ 👨‍🦱 HAIR LOSS: ▶▶ https://www.keeps.com/TimDillon 📦 SHIPPING: Enter code TIMDILLON ▶▶ https://www.shipstation.com/ 🎧 HEADPHONES: For 15% off! ▶▶ https://www.buyraycon.com/tim 🤳 COLOGNE AND SKINCARE: Use code TIM ▶▶ https://hawthorne.co/ 🛏️ BEDS: ▶▶ https://helixsleep.com/timdillon 🚗 INSURANCE: ▶▶ https://gabi.com/timdillon 🚬 QUIT SMOKING: Use code TIM: ▶▶ https://lucy.co ⚓ NICK DAVIS'S PODCAST (BELOW DECK) ▶▶ https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/another-below-deck-podcast/id1216741721 💆THERAPY ▶▶ https://www.betterhelp.com/TIMD 📦 BOX OF AWESOME ▶▶ http://boxofawesome.com use code TIMDILLON at checkout for 20% off 💊 MASF SUPPLEMENTS ▶▶ https://masfsupplements.com/ use code TIMD for 10% OFF 🧴 DUKE CANNON DEODERANT ▶▶ https://dukecannon.com/ use code DILLON for 10% off 💍 NORTHBANDS RINGS ▶▶ https://www.northbands.com/ use promo code TIM for 20% off BITCOIN CONFERENCE ▶▶ https://b.tc/conference use code TIMDILLON for 10% off CERTIFIED PIEDMONTESE BEEF ▶▶ 25% OFF with discount code TIMDILLON at https://www.cpbeef.com HELLO FRESH ▶▶ Go to https://www.hellofresh.com/timdillon12 for 12 free meals including free shipping! ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬   𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃: 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timjdillon/ 🐦 Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/TimJDillon 🌍 Tim Dillon Live Dates!: http://timdilloncomedy.com/#shows 📹 Subscribe to the channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC161r7ShBvMxfyzCtiSMRbg Listen on Spotify! https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1woKiAazAKPWPkHjds   ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬   ▶▶ Ed McMahon [e-mail] https://www.instagram.com/benaveryisgood/ https://twitter.com/benaveryisgood   ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ #TheTimDillonShow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

They're trying to get people out of this hotel and it's like, you know, they got to come with the drawers of life Okay, if you laugh or what, you know, check out check out to noon. It's just bad doors People are waking up. You're like, yo, what you like Staff has those needles that they look like a paramedic skip the heroin Alex Are we rolling yet, okay I'm rolling. Um, yeah, no, it's bad. They are You know The the people next door to us like they were just I thought the cops were here

Like they would just bang it on the door and then finally the door swings open and the guy's like he's like sleepy And you could tell, you know, and they're like you have to leave like they're they're like they're not even using the word Check out anymore. They're like you have to leave you have to go. You can't live here This isn't your home My friend Yeah, I mean, I'm in South Beach man in Miami. The party here is intense and You know, obviously it's Miami. There's some very hot people. There's some very good-looking people, but there are some real Sloppy pigs. I'm talking

Women in the high twos and well into the threes Hundreds of pounds. Yeah, 300s Wearing bikinis and like the sheer outfits. You can see everything. I mean, it's We've gone a little far with the body positivity. I think I Mean some men like that Sure, I Mean sure, but I mean, we're just we're going we're going Oh, it's crazy, but I have a feeling these people aren't reading Vogue Teen Vogue magazine and getting their

Taking their cues from that. That's a good point. I think maybe they're maybe their confidence is innate You know, maybe it wasn't they didn't need a blog to let them know that they were good enough And I have no problem with people rocking out big people But it's just there's there's to me. There are things aesthetically that look good and things that don't it's like You know Try to you know, a little mystery is nice, right? Little mystery. What's the gentleman discover? Yes. Let the gentleman discover let him go on a journey of discovery I mean, they got it all out. I mean literally we're looking at fat pussies. Wow like literally fat

foophers are hanging out Sounds nice in brightly colored pastel clothing. It's like it's on the beach in the streets It's not like that that I've seen but it's not that far away Right from that like I could see it gets there people are hanging out of windows of cars Dancing they these people understand life Much better than people that are like in Brooklyn in a room debating like, you know Karl Marx

On like a you know, and they pull a ratty blanket up over themselves to go to sleep These people are just tits out plus out Coking the nose dancing out of the window of a car if this is the end of America as we have, you know said that it is Why not go out with a literal bang? Yeah, you want to like, you know watch the end of the world while you're checking your mutual fund, right? What is this? Well, there's also this idea that like these people like they don't really understand

What's going on outside of this area, right? Yeah, because they're fucking each other not kids, right? right So they are like Hey, I can just Enjoy what I got the food. I Mean the food's kind of dog food, you know the croquetas are good You have to go to the Cuban food Yeah

That's fine. It's good. You don't get nice Cuban sandwich with them in Swiss milk. I mean come on. It's fine It's good. I don't want to go to war with people in the comments about Cuban food. I'm sure fine I was in great Cuban food, but you know some of it is It's all big deep fried and yeah, you know, we were eating it last night, you know a comic took us Here less, you know, it's funny. They were like, you know, the audience is very white some of the other comments You're like your audience is pretty white. I'm like what? I'm like, what am I supposed to do? Like there's diversity in the audience by the way Yeah

Right like there's Hispanics. There's blacks, but like yeah, there's white people out there and you know the comic Yeah, they play a lot of white music this time in the club like they play like a journey for your fans They're white people and I'm like, yeah, man. I'm sorry. It's called diversity. Yeah, that's exactly right. I'm sorry You know, I get it. I'm sorry. I don't do more bits in Spanish. I don't know Spanish I only know the foods You could have learned What, you know, we use one of those a three-hour sessions of eating crawfish Yeah, to learn to learn to speak espanol. I should have but I mean if a guy like me starts speaking Spanish

I immediately look like a Republican congressman who's apologizing for something horrible like I don't look like I'm doing the language You know, I'm like You know, so people assume you don't learn it together promotion of the DEA Yeah, I learned Spanish when we were infiltrating how you haven't been down here to Miami. No, I've been to New Orleans as close as I've been I've never been to Florida yet. We got to get you to Florida I'd love to go to South Beach. Just hang out with the honeys There are a lot of big guys here that all wear white shirts and little hats

I mean, this is yeah, I gotta be honest with you. There's a life for us here Sure, there's a life for us here people assume that like this guy might be about things because he's a big guy Yeah, if you just wear a white 5x shirt from DXL with two like black stripes on either side and a little hat and you smoke a cigar people go That guy's something. Yeah, that's a problem with certain fat people. They can't become a thing Right, but like these people down here like the fat Cubans they're a thing and one of the guys on the site was he's like the Cuban people because we are strong fat

He goes we are fat, but we work so our stomachs are hard even though they're fat. I'm like This is a very interesting way to I get it, but the stomach Speak at a turn here Okay, and so like, you know differences of physiology, right? Yeah, I know what you mean I mean, it's like like I used to say what so it was like some Owen guys. There's a There's big some Owen dudes like there's a I mean Orwell wrote about this in Burmese days, which I'm not sure if that's still a if that's acceptable, but he doesn't say anything that bad I don't think I'll go ask the people in the hotel if we can use Burmese days from Orwell

I'll go I'll go knock on the doors and ask everybody if it's okay But he described the body of like the I guess they were you know Burma which was what me and Marnell and if their fat was round and shapely not like not not like porridge like an Englishman's Interesting. Yeah, but well, it's a hardening. Yeah, but I don't think I do that There is something to that. Well, someone was explaining it to me last night. I didn't understand it because Cuban fat is hard Work fat like it's fat. That's become a muscle in a weird way. I don't know. I mean, I'm not but That was what was being discussed with me last night eating croquettes at two o'clock in the morning at a longer mat Yeah, where I was that's I was taking a laundry mat, which was good and we had croquettes and pastelitos

We had never you know, I don't think I don't think that's how you get work fat though No Yeah, that is not the journey of work fat You know, I just love the idea of a father looking at his son who's like a chubby kid and going the goal here is hard fat Work fat. You understand I don't have like an age of everything's acceptable. They're they're delineating fat types You're a worse kind of fat you're disgusting My stomach is hard because I work I eat and I work and I have hard fat the fat is like muscle

I'm beautiful not disgusting fat like you son. You will never be work fat Work fat, what a great name for my new order biography work fat It's nice being out of Austin, Texas, which we all know we have to pretend is the epicenter of the world Listen, it's a tax scam, which I'm glad to be a part of but every time I say something nice about it I feel like a guy talking about the beaches on the Cayman Islands, you know The water have you had the food and the guy's like, who gives a shit, you know, no, you got to understand It's crystal clear the water is crystal clear This is a good point. Do you think that the Caymans developed a decent culinary?

Culture because I'm sure it's fine, but I'm sure that it's not the reason people are going, you know I'm gonna be there anywhere you get a nice Well, they got a service people. Yeah, when Jeffrey Epstein shows up to check in on you You want to get get him an ex Benedict? You want to get him a Benny? He's one of you McDonald's. You don't want to watch this Lane Maxwell eating Arby's She's got to eat a Benny You know, I mean I get it and listen I like Austin to a degree, but it's also a dump and everything about it is

Disappointing the people of the audiences are bad from what the ones that I've encountered and the the city is like five or seven blocks of like Just disgusting bars and like people busking with guitars. It's like some heroin addict playing sweet Carolina. I mean, it's horrible Well, when you describe to me, it sounds like Williamsburg Brooklyn with the addition of country line dancing. That's exactly what it is It's Williamsburg Brooklyn We're all the and it just smells like a roasting pig Like the mesquite trees make the entire thing smell like a pulled pork sandwich like you can't get out of it There's no getting away from it. It's barbecue. Let me ask you this because I enjoy barbecue

I never had probably I'm sure I've never had barbecue that good, you know, the decent places around here is still crap probably But that being said, is it the kind of food that you can eat all the time and no No, no But it's like anything else people get used to it I mean people just get used to the idea of eating pounds of meat Coleslaw potato salad macaroni cheese baked beans, you know a quart of sweet tea or more That reminds me. Yeah. No, I I I've lambasted barbecue The thing about barbecue is, you know, the restaurants they serve it in, you know

And I talk about this on stage sometimes you'll pass a place and you'll go is that a homeless shelter and they'll go No, that's the highest rated restaurant in the state. I mean all of these barbecue restaurants do look like thematents They look like, you know, the majority of them the best ones the ones you really want to go to look like it's where you would Take someone to get like, you know, I don't know a poor person would get like an abortion consultation, you know Not even where they perform the abortion, but where they'd have to sit you down and go like here are the options and instead They give you, you know, meat and pickles. I mean, it's just it's a dumpy Thing I'm gonna get to the point where they just throw you down on top of a trash can one guy fucks Dean the ass and the other one's feeding you pulled pork. That's coming. Yeah, that's honest way

That's the new experience. That's the new Franklin barbecue experience Which you'll pay $700 for and you'll wait in line for three weeks That's the other thing you wait in lines people stand in lines and and after the pandemic forget it the lines are coming back I mean these lines snake around the block It's like you're waiting for a ride at Disney World except the ride is brisket It just to me. I don't know. I want to go in and we sit down. I want to eat and I want to leave I don't want to eat off a garbage can lid But I get it's a cool experience to have a few times a year

But as a cuisine that you could do anything with it's just not I mean, you can't take like lit I guess you could take investors out for barbecue and I'm sure these tech demons will I'm sure these monsters will you know Like they'll be there eating ribs and talking about you know, you know selling data of children's nurseries Get them get to know them when they're young, you know, that's the pork. Yeah, sure Miami. I don't know anyone gets anything done I mean, it's not a city where you can function. I mean Peter teal move down here. I know that and he's been here a few years He's early in Miami as these monsters from club. I say he's an early adapter Adopter adapter, right? Well, right early adopter

Um, is that because it's so hot and humid you're saying or is it just a party culture? It's just a party culture It's it's hot. It's humid. It's beautiful, but it's also like what are you gonna do? It's very stress-free environment. Like I can't see much getting done here You know, I feel like it'd be nice and like, you know early in the morning and late at night But something about like that blaring sun in the middle of the day and we're just out partying LA's got the best climate the best climate is that desert climate where it's like 75 80 during the day It's a hot you're in the pool and then at night you got the hoodie on nothing better. Truly no better climate in the country Everything else is humid. I mean, it's just a phenomenal climate now. Obviously that comes with a lot of problems

But if you want to talk about weather You want to talk strictly weather Los Angeles has the best weather I think in the country I think I might move to one of these hot spots though and just how can I stockpile penicillin to sell later? Because I don't you're gonna have to speak to someone on clubhouse The app right is rapidly degenerating and disintegrating Into a real I like literally I every time I asked someone about clubhouse I'm like, but this guy has money, right?

That guy is in a youth hostel like that person is literally homeless like and I can't believe I was taken by this Like I'm fully admitting I was taken by clubhouse like I'm fully admitting I was egg on my face I was completely bamboozled by this app I saw Mark Andreessen in one room and I went this is where the power players are Every single person I have met from clubhouse in the real world or have spoken to from clubhouse is like a Fraud on a level of epic proportions and not even a fun one like not even a tin men Fun aluminum siding salesman like it's just completely insane. I mean, it's crazy Every time I've got a notification on my phone since I joined that like oh this person's joining clubhouse

You want to like help help invite them? It's always been people who like literally went to jail for identity theft I used to know The worst people I've ever met and they're on my phone for some reason. Yeah, they're on clubhouse. Yeah Somebody was writing bad shacks. He's now like hey, what's going on on clubhouse? Let me start a room. It was a great idea. They're the pandemic and I remember I used to call ray I'm like, this is gonna be big and he's like, I don't know I was swept up in the mania of the idea that clubhouse was just gonna be because I had 50,000 I have like 50,000 followers, so I thought like

And if we don't if you don't know what we're talking about here Just Google it you moron, but I had 50,000 followers and I was like, oh, yeah, this has got to be big There's no way this won't be big Just because I got on it early it's somewhat early not that early But I'm like, I'll be able to build here and the whole app was just really Eric Weinstein talking for 23 hours a day Well, you told me there's new this new Wild West of content and everyone's like you can do whatever you want He's rooms that you're in right and then like I'm in a room with Jake Paul and he gets all clammed up because I mentioned the Golden Triangle I don't think he's clamped up. I think he had no idea what you were talking about

Here, which is fine. I'm not expecting him to like it Triangle something he participated in in LA and he's terrified about what's gonna come out. You had no idea who you're talking about I've heard Jake Paul Jake Paul was one of the most intellectual people on that app though I mean literally when he explained NFTs to David spade spade could not even figure out like how to get on the app He didn't know where his phone was and like so Jake Paul I was explaining NFTs and how kids are like digitally native to David spade and it was like a fascinating conversation Well, yeah, it'd be fair. I don't know if I was the negative of David spade I feel like the younger mind has become more malleable to bullshit

Sure, like but he explained it with a silver tongue like sure It was beautiful. Why can't you get it David? We're fucking these people But you have uh, you know Lekith Stanfowl who's a fan of our show? I'm a fan of his what I'm a fan I didn't know who he was last time but I realized like oh, I love that guy Well, well, I'm glad you said that because He just moderated a clubhouse room where they were calling Jews Satanists and parasites. Oh sure Mike So I'm glad

See sometimes you got away from me fully articulate what I was about And and then he put up on his Instagram, which is hilarious. He goes. Hey man Thinking out of the box is always gonna come with the cost Because it's always gonna come with the cost man So the Keith we feel bad for him He's a fan of the show But he moderated cuz some of these clubhouse rooms get real wild and then people just put them on YouTube. It's not like

By the way, what a way to lose your job Like it's the clubhouse is the perfect way to lose your job. Oh, yeah, it's it's worse than Twitter It's like well, you can't even hide yourself You can't even hide you can't even claim context because like it's literally recording of you saying something right and So they they're moderating these clubhouse rooms Like you have to go in because what was the name of the room like, you know, Satanist Jews or whatever because I don't know Half the time these rooms are in for many things You're scrolling through and you go like Tom Arnold's in this room like what?

It's always someone who's trying to get something going too, right, you know, it's always someone who's like Coming back from the half-dad trying to crawl into this space, you know what I mean, you know what I mean It's like oh Rick. Yeah, Rick Moranis sounds off on cancel culture You know Rick Moranis, you know says PC culture like he reemerges from the from raising his children to complain about PC culture Well, but it was it's always weird and then journalists were just hanging out in the rooms to get people in trouble Taylor Lorenz from the Times famously, but there were others too and then there were just scammers like life coaches and people that were selling

This makes me laugh so hard and if you buy one of these courses on clubhouse, I just think you deserve everything you get but people that were I can't even get it out people were selling like Business strategy courses on clubhouse Selling like marketing Courses on clubhouse. I mean think Gary V but like all the levels down like when he started when he says nobody and People are getting really ripped off on clubhouse. They were like life coaches on clubhouse

This is a problem of like everyone was to show in college these days And they are awful institutions, but when you in the absence of like actual colleges look what you get you get This is why you have to have a credit university. Yeah, no you get a life coach on clubhouse You know, I'm not gonna mention her name, but there was a comic I swear to God we were in carolines and she said to me once she goes I'm also a life coach, which I found odd She was unsuccessful completely, but whatever then she told me that her and her family were being evicted from their home And I was just wrestling with all these ideas in my head of like

Just the confidence that she has to then give other people advice like that's my whole thing I'm like if you listen to this show enjoy it Maybe some of it's interesting or whatever, but it I'm not giving you advice ever on anything I'm like, I'll tell you what I think you should do, but that doesn't mean you should do it ever That's because you unless you're 21 and healthy in which case I suggest you not get Vaccinated at Tim date Tim J Dylan on Twitter. If the media picked this up, this would be horrible I'm just trying to get attention Right. Why is everyone still paying attention to him?

You know if you're vaccinated Pfizer me too. Yeah, I got my second shot you did through it Yeah, I was tired. I was lethargic and tired. I think it's sick or anything I didn't get sick either. I felt weird. My stomach felt weird Okay, yeah, so I would eat and then my stomach would feel weird I don't think I got that but you know, I had a bunch of pizza, you know, just instinctively. Yeah That's my body's defense mechanism. Yeah, just a little pizza the person giving you the shackles now. Listen You might get a little sick, but here's a good way to hold it down Go eat some pizza. You want to hold this down? You want to hold the demon down?

Go eat some pizza right now. I mean when you when you when you think about the hilarity of Clubhouse now tanking and the people that run it supposedly does a four billion dollar valuation. What the fuck? Yeah, look, I mean In a country where like, you know doge and good for doge, but I mean like all these things are happening Like when you go, oh, I actually have an app. You might it'll be Microsoft now. Right. Yeah. No, it functions. Oh good for billion You know, it's like not in on cryptos. You've ridiculed cryptos You've stood on the sidelines with the institutional investors in your Hamptons home

You've stood there with a lot of the large banks. This is something that has surprised many of us You instead of embracing the crypto revolution, you didn't really embrace a lot of the Wall Street bet stuff You stood with your blue bloods in Newport, Rhode Island in Greenwich, Connecticut in the Hamptons now And I'm asking you a question now. You you'd constantly are just defending the old guard All right, you are a legacy and I get it, but can you speak on this? Can you speak on your resistance? Let's get something clear. I lost blood in Wall Street's bets. How much did you lose? 250 about 250 dollars. Yeah, I got out, you know, but I got in I got out because you know, it's like Um, it's like you guys I have hope. I'm the rare cynic. Who can have hope?

Yes, I watch a Marvel movie and I cry. Yeah, I lose some money on Wall Street Yeah, because you're crying because you're being tased. You're watching it through the window of someone else's home And there's security approaches. Well, I don't have cable. Yeah. Um so Look, it's it everything Looks great now and I look like a big idiot and look, I don't personally care because I'm at the guy Regardless of whether I think it's good or not, but I don't think uh, Did you see the bill mar peace on it? I did see it. Um, his reasoning was a little, uh,

Just old man yelling at the sun kind of thing. Yes, but it wasn't totally it wasn't he wasn't totally wrong He's like ethereum has more market cap than disney and it has no pro. You know what I mean? It's like Yeah, but it's just he's such a horrible conduit of information. He's such a hateable person Every time I talk about this I am every comment section of me and every every I'm the big fat moron who doesn't understand. I'm making 10 year old arguments Let's get something included. The arguments were never addressed because they can't be addressed. Uh, this is not What you know, how I'll adjust them right now I'll adjust them right now make one of your arguments against crypto

I'm gonna address it right now in my in who I am now with my ray bands and my miami hat Okay, make an argument. I'll address it. Here's one. Here's a new one. I have other people have it So we have like at least four cryptos that are really like capped up right five a ton a bunch Or are they all gonna be currency? How about you go fuck your mother But are they all gonna be now ask me ask me Is it a good idea to let people that are buying houses defer interest?

It's a good idea to allow people who are buying houses hey go fuck your mother See that's the response that stops people like you in your tracks Because you come we're having a party This is the thing about a party people are trying to ruin a party This is a party during a high school party When you're fingering your friends and if you're like me you're hugging your friends because they won't fuck you Whatever if you're in the middle of a high school party and people are drunk and everybody it's senior year

Nobody comes up to you and goes do you think we'll all be as close when we're in college? And that's what you're doing you're coming up to people at a party and going What's tomorrow at 3 p.m. Gonna be like and you're like dude. I don't know But it's fucking 1 a.m. Now and it's lit So my argument is that shit is lit. No, they're not all gonna be currencies Bitcoin is the reserve currency And all of the other currencies are going to be little fun things That people can enjoy and possess and find whatever value they find in them

Okay, but that's inherently an argument against them No I mean No, oh, it's a troll doll cool. It's a digital troll doll What is it's an opportunity for people to believe again It's a beanie. We need a bitcoin movie where they give a field of dream speech Someone needs to get up and go like you know the town

You know the scene of tommy boy where they're talking to the workers that have all been and they're like in this town This factory I remember we need a speech where a guy's like this is giving people a chance to believe again People that were rioting not two months ago people that were smashing the windows of the capital This is they were marching in Charlottesville. This is giving them a new thing to talk about It's better than that. Isn't it better than wearing viking horns? Yes or yes I'm not saying bitcoins all all right people stop it because I know that's the fucking new york times Angle that all these crypto shits are but it is this anti establishment people And it should be establishment people who are actually doing quite well in the system to begin with a lot of time

Dave portnoy is a struggling farmer So and so is he like musk so stops Stop this argument that this is incredibly wealthy people Duping people that spend all day looking at your computer. These are good men who are struggling Look, I mean, I hear you here. I don't know that the American psyche what it needs most right now is hope I think you know, I think fair point. Hope is kind of the the the antecedent or whatever to Self-reflection. I think we need a little more self-reflection a little less hope

But that being said I'm all for doge. I'm doge We need a little party We need a party and we're having a party and I think we haven't worked hard Wait, where is this hard work that we're paying all that we're like celebrating parties never are the result of hard work It's a good point good parties hard workers don't party good parties are actually better when the people there haven't worked at all The work is the party to understand Putting all the work into the party Partying is a job for people

You know, we go out with this guy last night. I have to show her eating croquettes. It's 2 a.m. He goes He goes tomorrow night. You want to go out? You want to get into something? What circles you guys want to get into? I'm like this guy's married. I'm sober. I'm exhausted. I just did two shows. There is no party. I'm 36 What am I going to do? I don't want to stand in a room full of people and hear their shit anymore I'm done. I'm just done. I was 23. I went to parties where they said sure Were they Christmas parties at mortgage companies? Yes. Was I drinking with people twice my age? Yes Was I getting laid? No. Was I fucking you know living the life of a 45 year old divorced man when I was 22? Sure, but whatever I was supposed to be doing

It didn't happen. I went to the city and danced a few times at clubs. I get it But 30 fucking six enough's enough already We've got to move the fuck on what I'd like now is a little cryptocurrency And just some quiet Yeah, I tried to see the city dancing But I ended up on the side of the building puking in my while sitting Like like sitting down like and then like puking into my lap when was that? Huh, when was that?

Year decades ago. I remember it was like 22 or whatever and you went to the city and you were dancing and then you just You ended up outside puking. I party too hard. That's what happens. Yeah That's what I want. I want it all right now. I can't I can't pace myself Yeah, but the guy doesn't understand. He's like you guys want to go out to you guys party. I'm like, dude. I can't party. I'm tired I've done two hours of comedy. I could record a podcast Uh, it's tiring for me I don't is there's something wrong with people and they're like mid 30s heading Heading north to their late 30s who are like using the word party

Well, I always assumed as a very younger, but like by the time I was like 25 I realized oh party means cocaine I mean literally like It's like it's just the dancing's an excuse because you need something to do while you're on coke Right, so it's like well that's what actually likes it. You can buy dogecoin. Yeah Well, that's the real sad thing if people just you know Kind of blinds a fucking oxy and then just clicking the buy button on fucking NFTs and doge and like It's it's uh You're not getting like at least at least if you're biased like a fucking crazy car you can't afford

You get that car make it way a few times you get a fucking you get to drive around before you crash into a kid Right. Uh, there's some fun, but like There's nothing tangible. I mean, I'm saying that look let's assume you make a ton of money later on Remember if you live if you live to get there. There's nothing fun in the interim Right remember when that guy hit John Gotti's kid like it was a mistake and then he disappeared And apparently John didn't want him, you know anything to happen to him, but the guys underneath them were like, oh, we can't So the guy It's funny now like to stay to the mob now if you hit that kid with a car they'd be like good

One must mount the feet They wouldn't care at all It's just interesting like that whole that's why I like that new york like when everyone's like new york I'm like that You're talking about like 30 years ago like you're more more like The 70s was the last time they really had like yeah Solid grip because by the 80s. Yeah, I got he just and everyone must have known. Oh, this is going down Yeah, I just flashed everything around the new mafia is is fucking bitcoin. That's the new mafia

That's the new criminal enterprise. I'm doing the bitcoin convention down here in miami and it makes so much sense that it's here in miami June 4th through the 6th. We don't know what we're doing yet Uh, the what is it the 3rd through the 6th bad 3rd to the 5th 3rd to the 5th the 3rd is what ben whale night Well, yeah, well night And what is that? So these are the hodls the people who just hold no matter what and they have massive quantities of bitcoin They come in on the 3rd for uh, I don't know who's calling a whale night. They're like, they know you're being called whales Yes, they're bitcoin whales problem. They love it when you're a whale you're like the whole point of a whale is to get taken When did this get like blurred not at a party?

Uh, and so they want to come in now. Well elan musk is hosting s&l. So let's stop with any idea that there's any type of you know, uh You know like, um, you know decency left amongst evil tyrants There used to be some level Wednesdays for the whales Thursdays for the rape victims. Yeah, can you Thursdays for the rape Sunday is sexual assault night. Um What do you think about elan hosting s&l? How bad will it be or will it be great? Um, I don't think it'll be great. Yeah, it's like

You know, look, it's not wednesday ever funny. So that's not the issue. It's just more like here's what I think would be great I'll cast breakdown like they're doing a sketch and ad bryant turns around him and starts crying and goes You have more money than god and people are starving If they had the balls to ever do that, they wouldn't be on s&l. I know but just think about it for a minute Like bow and yang and ad bryant start crying and going It's not okay. What's happening people are suffering. Like I want people standing up in the s&l Uh, uh studio like audience members standing up screaming people are sick. They're dying People are suffering and I hope it's during your sketch where elan musk has a dumb little hat

And he's in a costume and people are screaming and people like I lost my fucking job I live on the street and then elan musk is like he's got to go along with it He's got to go along with the sketch But then it's harder and harder to do and he starts looking out in the audience And he's got this little like jester hat on or something I feel like he would handle that much better than like if it didn't because He'd have some he is good at like having the pity response of like Well, it's getting to those that'll really help you out. Well, yeah, but but I just wanted to go off the rails

I'm just saying but if it doesn't go off he'd be do better because like Otherwise you're watching this guy. Who's confident and he's a shark salesman. What do they call it shark fin salesman? Snake oil snake oil snake oil. Yeah, and uh shark fin In the shark fin salesman He sells shark fins to make soup in china. Isn't that the fucking thing? Listen, but uh, you know, there's just mechanics to being funny that he didn't have any of like he's not a funny guy And so it'll just it'll just be another lame episode Unless unless there's an insurrection

And then unless there's an insurrection during the live taping where people start begging him to give his money to the poor Which I you're telling me that's not more entertaining. That would be yes I'm just hoping for that. That's a millionaire's gonna be asking a billionaire to give more money to the poor. That's the fun of it. Yes Yeah, that's the fun of that. We'll be that. Well, the inherent counter hypocrisy is not unheard of Perfect. I just want a little Lamb's blood on the door as they would say no violence. No violence Just just awkwardness That would be fun. It would be very fun mad tv would have done that. It would have been great. Yeah

Well, the cast members of mad tv would have literally been homeless It would have been like i'm asking you for help I mean, I wonder what it's like, you know, there's gonna be all these stories I guess that come out after the fact about like, you know, what was it really like backstage with elon But it's like listen lauren's worth half a billion and he's a legend deserves this money would have but like the idea that like What? I guess I mean, he's got you know What'd you say everyone deserves their money most they stole it so i'm like i'm like, yeah, great

I mean, he doesn't deserve it the last few seasons, but he's deserves what i mean He's curated comedy the most powerful force in american comedy probably ever in terms of what he's curated That's why it sucks so much, but sure that that being said He didn't think we raised a level of power right the guy's not poor No, he's doing quite well So like the idea that like elon musk it comes in and they're all like i it's so where do you draw the line? Is like 500 million? Is that okay?

But this guy does have a hundred billion so i get what you're saying, but You know, some people would make that argument about people worth 500 million I look i mean we all acknowledge that money is fake right which is a bit coin thing Like we get it it's fiat money a lot of it's created like By bullshit and people are acting like a lot musk his value went up and therefore like he took that Like he took turnips all your children's plate away from them Like they're like like they would have had a sack of flour If if the price of tesla didn't go up right like it's disconnected like it's all like i don't like them

I think it's a big scan. I know you know The the good cars i'm told that's fine, but like, you know, I don't know. I don't think he even invented the cars didn't brand himself as like he's branded himself as kind of like the adolescent billionaire in a way like he's this impulsive uh social media driven

Personality that like is talking about going to mars all the time and like you know has the hot Performer wife who's who tattooed? Alien things on her back and they named their kid after a math equation or whatever like he's he's you know Whereas bill gates has branded himself as like i am your father And I will help you and i'm a public health Uh guru and me and my wife talk about the lack of hope of watching billion be like oh you can be a billionaire And then you're still gonna be warm buffeter bill gates, right? It's like what's the point of any of this at least i want musk it gives you the lottery gives you an illusion of like

Oh, like you can just if you make a billion dollars you can Fuck a tree if you want. Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, right, right At least it gives you some it gives you some hope the idea that it means something well bill gates's argument Is like hey man, I made all this money And now I really want control over all life on the planet. So that will motivate a certain group of people Bill gates supposedly there's stuff coming out now where melinda gates warned bill about epsions Like I don't want you anywhere near him and bills like I I think he's a good guy Like they literally met him once and melinda's like hey, I think there's some problems here and bill's like

You're always doing this with my new friends, you know You're she's like bill. He's got an island. There's all these young women around He's like you're always doing this with my friends, you know, I love you But I also need other people to hang out with it. We just can't have a guy's night. It's a boy's night We can't have man club men's night I mean, it's a weird marriage because apparently Like one of the deal breakers was like look we can be married. I'm not gonna cheat on you wink wink But I'm gonna take one vacation a year with my ex-girlfriend where we go to a beach house and ride dune buggies

And like talk and talk on the beach And she was like that's cool. That's yeah, well, I would too that kind of mom. I go sure But it's just it's just a bizarre like why can't you just go to vegas and tell your wife you're in a meeting? Why do you have to like it's a weird level of like I'm gonna let you know your face. I'm really this is what I go back to nobody sees any value anymore in lying Right. This is a this this obsession with truth is destroying our society Um lying is is for people you care about So this this thing of like full disclosure all the time and I want to be honest. I'm gonna let it hang out

This is who I am Is really destructive truly being who you are Admitting the things you think about Getting on a level of honesty and sharing all your thoughts feelings fears and insecurities with the world Is terribly destructive and it will eventually lead to your uh destruction. I mean, it's it's a horrible idea You should have secrets. You should have secrets not huge ones not epsi level secrets But you should have secrets and you should choose your friends and lovers based on the people You're willing to share certain secrets with but you don't want to share everything because then you're not a mystery anymore

Nobody likes someone who's not a mystery. You want someone to be a little bit of a mystery If you're not taking something to the grave you lived your life wrong That's what I mean. All of these billionaires are so upsetting now because you're constantly vomiting every thought on twitter You know, there's no mystery to them. We don't we we know everything about them We know everything about celebrities celebrities been destroyed in this country because it's been commodified In this weird way through social media that we're seeing the omelettes they eat the vacations they take There there there's no value to the mystery of like I wonder what that person's really like Can you imagine how you know how like the those nazis went to argentina after the war?

Yes, you imagine how quickly they were gotten caught nowadays, right? They would just yeah, they'd be tick-tocking They'd be tick-tocking german songs in argentina Right, but the problem is the lack of mystery and I've talked about this and and and it's with with with people that are successful in business athletes Entertainers people don't want to know you that well. It's why I don't do a podcast every day It's why I don't do an instagram story all the time. I love whitney Cummings You know what I mean? I do and I'm legally obligated to say that because I've signed a contract

But I know I do love whitney, but the reality is whitney does instagram stories all day every day Now, yes, they'll be used in documentary several years from now charting her course into Madness and they will never use in court and they'll be used as evidence in court when she finally blows the brains off of that veterinarian she's dating but the point is I'm saying she's too exposed. You're too accessible people want less She always tells me they want more And I'm like they think they want more like people tell me I want you to podcast every day And I'm like you think you want that you don't you don't know what you want

The artist has to be above the the patron of the earth where we were called the victim or the the audience Yeah, I loved it. I'm we're saying this i'm in a miami hat and shades smoking cigarettes in a hotel bathroom Brent can you ben can you bring me a cigarette out now and we'll see what happens when I smoke it in the room? What is it? It's only $250 right? Yo, I was writing a car the other day ready to go. It's $200 if you smoke in the car. I swear to god I went charge that now I'm like you might want to charge just charge it now because it's I mean I'm gonna light a cigarette up as I drive out of the rental place

You're gonna see me smoking in the car. So I get an ashtray or something ben Jesus christ these people and I uh Thank you. Yeah, sure. I'll use a bottle of water Um, that's awful. I want to quit but I also thought should I just bring an ashtray wherever I go Get a little soap dish ben for the cigarette. Jesus christ Thank you. Get me a soap dish. Look at this. They know people are smoking. This is for this is for whatever it is, but I have you quit yet. Have you quit yet? No, I I haven't quit yet. Uh It just tastes too goddamn good

I just enjoy it Repeat what you just said I said have you quit yet? It just tastes too goddamn good It's really hard Yeah, I don't know until I'm 70. What's the point to entertain these ungrateful pigs? You know, if you like if you say we have to stop doing heroin, it's like No one in my family stopped my cousin is still on it My other cousin and my friend ryan who just went would be asked for 10 dollars before lord He's still on it. So I don't think anyone quits heroin

Some people do I didn't do Didn't jimmy jimmy hendrick stop or something Maybe yeah, that sounds like a pr campaign. We'll never get to the bottom of that No, whatever, but at least like heroin at least like, you know, you go Well, I can't you know, if I if I do another shot of heroin, I might you know, strangle a baby or whatever You know fall asleep on my baby. There's things you do on heroin that aren't good I'm smoking a cigarette. It's like I might die You know what so I can't live to see fucking uh, you know, jake paul become president

Fighting fighting the goddamn that the horrors. We're all gonna witness are are unimaginable They're unimaginable. The horrors are just a climate horrors They're gonna like you won't be able to leave your house at a certain period It's like that it's so hot wherever you go now That you go, how much hotter can it get and I'm not even a fucking global warming freak But like how much hotter can this shit get? Uh, I think a lot hotter. I mean, it's what that you know browner sources like the heat and that's what you know The world used to be like yeah, I mean it'll be it'll be a buck 20 in the shade all around the world

Yeah, that's gonna be a prop but but dubai is preparing to do everything that you would do outside like the head people They're doing it inside now in a climate controlled environment They have indoor ski resorts Yeah, but like that's not a good sustainable thing. It's like we're gonna use more fossil fuels of the You know, yeah Yes, we're the mission return kind of thing. No, that's why musk and all these guys are like we got to terraform and go to mars But that seems like a fool's errand too. Do you think the rich ever get off this planet? It feels like Yeah, no no

Look, you realize like they're they're trying to like musk has been doing this for years And he's nowhere near where the Apollo missions were. What the fuck are we doing like like we we If we hadn't went up after Apollo and like actually, you know, I know we built a space shuttle But like we didn't do much You know, maybe but but it's gonna be decades before we get to mars like, you know, like even more Everyone's gonna terraform it. I mean you probably need 100 years or 200 years to do that at least Yeah, there's no time for it. It's just a fun pet project Because you know, you know, it's like, you know, by the time

Within 20 years, I do think people will start riding like they're not gonna allow musk to like, you know Martial resources like this And so like I mean, look, maybe they just start shooting crowds You know, the clouds don't show up. Hold on. Wait, what? I'm just saying like We we've always said this like, you know, the idea is gonna get bad. Yeah, whatever it is and like for now They're content to like just play behind the scenes But if we did rise up, well, let's start shooting into a crowd and the disperse you

I'm just saying like that's like we're in a phase one, but we're acting like Oh, it's you know, if we go to phase two, they're gonna stay in phase one. Like no, no, they don't keep pace with us Yeah, it is funny to see like what'll be the next level of response from them I remember because that just being like he goes to state can dole out an unimaginable level of violence It's terrifying, but it's true No, I mean like these these the one Chris man. It's that guy. It's just the same article. He's not wrong But it's the same article Every week for the last 25 years and it's it's all like war the ranks fucking fan fiction

It's just like with like names inserted like, you know, Pelosi Pelosi's on the face of mount doom Like stop Shut the fuck up. It's your brimstone preacher. Hey, why don't you invest in douche? But you know, it's my best character ever is uh Hypey's chris hedges sneaker had chris hedges where he believes everything he believes But he has a collection of 2000 pairs of sneakers and he goes my one shame is that I can't stop buying sneakers He shows up to all of these lectures and churches where he's like we are in the beginning of the fifth grade extinction But you look at his feet and he's got like just new sneakers like like really colorful like hypey sneakers on

And he just to every lecture he gives He just shows up in these sneakers and then people start to notice it and they're like, hey, man. What are these sneakers? He goes, it's my one weakness. It's my one failing Why why chris hedges thinks that currency will fail and also he never wears the same pair of shoes twice It would be hilarious. We found that he had like a compound in miami It's just like a 10 million dollar compound like the chick from black eyes matter. She bought four million dollar houses I just think it'd be hilarious if chris hedges owned like a a 20 million dollar scar face estate in miami No, he hangs out with hookers who would do a crack a deal

You know, he's like the worst It'd be great Have a little fun. Have a little fun chris. We know it's the end. You're not wrong, but have a little fun get into douche I would love an article next week where chris hedges goes. I'm wrong Dogecoin is the future And it's just a really well written intellectual case for cryptocurrency I mean, if you think about it for a second, I'm like, he's a good guy, I guess But like when you write the same article all the time, you just some you're a slut for attention, right?

Can you imagine being? Well, he's not a job. That's not that's not whatever that is. It's not his job. He teaches people in prisons things He cheers them up. That's your job. My point is like you might just sit in prison And you're like, I want to get out of prison and finally get a job see my kids chris hedges just somebody's like We are in the middle of the fifth grade extinction All life on earth is going to be going away and you just have these guys all the resume though. Yeah Yeah

I'm really learning how to put together like a resume and try to market myself and chris is like the corporate oligarchs have pillaged all resources on earth The warden comes up. He goes, hey, can you pep it up a little bit next time? Like Can you inject a little levy into this? You know these guys we just don't want them to go out and reoffend It would just be funny if they find if they told chris they like listen We really want to have you here at the prison, but the last time you left

They all just started raping each other and beating the shit out of each other because they said nothing matters and there was a riot Welcome to the fifth grade extinction motherfucker What if he became like a look at david ikes showman? We're like he walked out on an arena and he's like and he did exactly that he's like welcome to the fifth grade extinction motherfuckers and was like He's like he's like the corporate oligarchs have pillaged this fucking planet Poor david ikes He's like the one guy he got displaced by qanon like all these crazy Can you imagine david ikes having to explain to somebody qanon when they're wrong?

Well, there's no luck at all actually you you've jumped the shock I remember when I first got into this in oh wait, like you know really got into like conspiracy stuff He was the guy like oh, this is the crazy one Like at that point like Alex still made sense to a certain extent. You know you can tell he's you know Whatever, but you know there's logic There's like all this stuff in 9-11 conspiracy and this guy's just talking about reptile This guy's just out there and now he's the least crazy It's completely inverted right david ikes david ikes like the same one who makes sense

But it's just so funny to me that like david ikes just I mean He's got to go on a retirement run like share You know like he's got he's got to just nice like i'm retiring, but we're just gonna do one more like The funniest thing ever was that episode where like he shows up He's in like this big arena in the UK. He's like all you supply soccer here I remember and the audience is like get to the lizards like he's he's waxing poetic about his days Is like a football player or like what are you doing david? I was a striker

He realized everyone just wants to be famous Yeah Yeah, but like, you know, it's hedges. It's like it's this guy. He's a grandiose But it's like why do you keep writing articles then the same article? It's because you want to get shared on schwitter like you're the same little dirty little animal. We all are You're a dirty little animal. Maybe the maybe the uh, maybe the um Uh episode title here. I just think you should move to miami I know it's all over when chris hedges moves to miami

Just moves to my wouldn't be funny if barstool sports hired chris hedges. That'd be amazing I think i'm suing him to make the end of making a clown pick your shirt with him Call your daddy's new co-host chris hedges He is he's not wrong like when you read these things, you don't you don't you don't look at the article and go Yeah, this guy's wrong. It's just funny That over and over again. It's just like we get it. It's like yeah Well, yeah, kato wasn't wrong either. I think I don't know those guys in Rome like yeah Or you want kato kaolin the guy who lives in the guest house of hochies. I'm like, this is an interesting reference

You're like kato kaolin wasn't wrong Or is it sister i'm thinking of those guys there's guys in Rome who were like, you know, uh, this is gonna end bad And we were like five or ten bad. So then why did you put up off hands? What a horrible producer He's a horrible producer He's holding out his hands like jesus On the cross there's not a day. I don't regret meeting him and what he's done to my show in my career. He's just destroyed it completely destroyed it

Um, yeah, we met this kid from clubhouse who's like 19 and he says adventure capitalist He's like driving his father's car. I mean, it's like it the whole thing here is I don't understand how they like My whole thing when I started I always be going clubhouse for like then like angel investors and vcs like When did you get a little some money from like I'm like, you can't be a 19 year old adventure cap like it doesn't make any sense Like they don't have any money. No, there is no money. There is no money You can't be a look if there might be some logic that like well I'm a guy who goes gets the money from the people with the money and like

Give it to you like that's not a cap. That's some kind of weird in between scam. You're a bag man Yeah, it's just bag man club clubhouse just a bunch of bag man the best I Mean he's a good kid and maybe he'll succeed one day. He's not a good case A scumbag who's on clubhouse telling people to investor stop mitigating these people are dirt There's there's a possibility don't go hollywood on me tim. There's a possibility Well, he he keeps telling everyone he's not gay, which gives me maybe some hope Why does he have to tell people that? Well, that's why I'm a little hopeful

But the uh, but he's he's too doughy. He's too doughy for me. It looks like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich Oh, because of because you gotta hang out with me. Yeah, he's just a good-looking young man. No, he's not okay It seems like a really good looking age. There's a cuteness to him, but he's too pudgy You know what it is? Have you ever seen someone who you know on the inside of them is fat? Yeah, and you go look in the mirror You go No, but like you go you're squishy. You're squishy and you're gonna be a big fat Pincushion, but you have a short period of time before you're not and that's a period of time

It might be nice to have sex with you, but then you're going to be a just you're just gonna be a doughy Jew boy, and there's nothing wrong with that, but Hey, ma'am It is what it is I just imagine like as we're taping this you just hear like the like using a battering ramp to get people out of the hotel Oh I scream at them sometimes like I don't be like 130. You have to check out of it. I'm going It's a nice place though, right hand me my phone. Let's see. No, I mean we're we're in we're in whatever like the police

Do they have room service yet? Yeah, we're in a better place Also, it's funny. My friend where I said address and I sent him two question marks. He never got back to me. So there He's he's he's a drug. He's drugging. My friend's out there drugging. God love him God love you move to Miami for the industry No, he was in rehab down here and now he's doing well. Well, yeah, look we have in wisconsin. We're doing go to Miami um Yeah, I mean here's a reality man at the end of the day people got to go to where they feel they're going to be

They're going to do best and my friend is uh He's had some struggles with drug addiction and uh and uh and and and uh other things like, you know, he's just he's got problems And he's in fort lord or dole right now trying to figure it out I'll get room good friend. Well, we didn't rehab now I don't know. I think he's out doing drugs now. Oh, okay. Well, I was watching you and Joe Rogan having a cocktail I'm like, that's not the way it should be happening You should be sober Look, I wish him the best on his journey and I hope he uh has a long

Why don't you move to Austin? Why don't you move to all it's the greatest thing that's ever been Well, I was about to move to LA and you just fucking you like a turnip. You just left he's fucking Listen, my house and I'm buying just got appraised for a hundred thousand dollars less than I'm buying it for Because I signed the appraisal waiver. I still have to do the deal. So come on in. We're all under water Come on in. We're getting under water again. Well, you got every new one No, I think the appraisals fucked and I think that the sales are not being recorded like

But the appraisal is not reflecting the market. The market is insanely hot. It's the hottest real estate market in America The problem with these appraisals is that that they don't uh necessarily Like all these sales that haven't been recorded yet aren't aren't used as comps And it's there. There's probably a two month three month lag um and Or I'm getting fucked again

It's either one either one But I'm going in with a down payment and it's a nice house and and whatever. I'm happy about it I love the whole rationale you've built out already like looking on the stands a leg in the market No, I I'm fully aware. It's a narrative that I'm building in my own head I'm just hoping it's true. I'm hoping that New York and in LA are taxing people out So they're all coming to uh to Florida and Texas and Austin's hot and the tech people So I'm hoping that the the house and you know, these things hold their value and increase in value

That's the hope when you buy a house The first house I bought was an unmitigated disaster But it was really good for you know, the stories I tell on the show and you know, perhaps this will be as well I just hope that it's You know, I hope that here's what I hope because I pitch shows about the last house I was in I don't want to pitch any shows about this house You know what I mean? Like I don't want any horror that I feel could be cinematic coming out of this experience

We should you should know you should do you should buy your old house at some point for what? Why? I don't know. It'd be fun for the show I don't know just to own it and then like, you know, it's a good gimmick. It's a fun gimmick Tim Dillon buys his old house Yeah, that's good Jake Paul is snatching Floyd wait Mayweather's hat and the way I compete with that is buying the house that I foreclosed on I got my house back people like who gives a shit fat fuck get out of here. Who cares?

I got my house back. No one cares. No one cares. Yeah, go die in it Where can people find you at chris edges? At twitter and instagram at ray kump. Uh, I have a podcast called kump podcast kump every week You know, we have a patreon is uh Follow the link link will be in the description You can get extra tell them tell them what the patreon is too. That is saying here the kump podcast patreon. Perfect. Yeah So, you know donate to that you get extra episodes of the show and you do a great show Lucy steiner Lucy steiner is my co-host. She's phenomenal's larry. We have reamed brooklyn communist

Kidding No, no, she's totally wrong. But you know, but we have lively debate. It's fun Listen, I love I love a communist. I can buy dinner. There's nothing wrong with that um Ray kump shows hilarious On youtube supported on patreon ray. We're gonna try to get down all week. Can you come down june for a week or two and do Stop sure. Okay. Um, we'll be back in the studio this friday recording next week's episode for all you people who are like I'm the fucking student

But then you also want to see me lie and it just is the thing with these people It's all the demands all the time. We want to see you live But also you should be in the studio But you're too fat, but you're not as fat as we want you to be But you're uh using a camera angle on yourself that makes you look less fat. That's all the instagram comments, but um um Why don't we start like a fucking line of clothes called thick bitch t h i c b i t i might not even kidding like

Dude, you started something called thick bitch like Ben should google it and find out if they have it already, but like I think brennan has something like that the Thick boys who cares we'll do thick bitch. What about thick bitch? We're about t h i x like thick bitch I mean, no, that's crazy But like thick bitch But brennan has thick boy Yeah What about thick bitch

No, we'd be the first thick bitch. We'd be the first thick bitch, which could be big or like uh um What about like like a woman a clothing line for plus-sized women like queen pig Bacon bitch bacon bitch bacon bitch Bacon bitch I mean here's the thing. I know that we're doing this is a joke, but you got to realize It would be the most successful thing we've ever done by like a long shot I

Just became this big merch thing It would be much bigger than like any hour special or podcast or any of that Like those are the guys behind bacon bitch. We're just sitting on a yacht in miami Eating baked beans. There's a restaurant in miami called bacon bitch. There's a restaurant called bacon bitch Smart of course there is and it's in miami, right? Yes, of course there is Call it bacon bitch um All right, everyone uh parting thoughts parting wisdom

um Yeah, I think clubhouse is gonna really big come back and i'm excited How fun it would be if there are live shootings on clubhouse like you just hear Like people start doing live shootings on clubhouse. Like it's just you know, eric winstein It's eric winstein. No, it just becomes a place to like live stream mass shootings like mass casualty events on clubhouse That'll be good for the stock price like what what about a place where it's just after every mass casualty event There's an instant conspiracy room on clubhouse where people just start talking about it with no information Practice it's all things with fake just show up the funerals

We're from clubhouse Seeing the seeing the thing that they believed in get totally taken over by cranks And and scammers is one of the funniest things in the world to me It's just hilarious. I mean there's just no way out of the fun That guy the people that have owned it have been working in silicon. I've been 20 years Like we finally got something we finally figured something out and then it's just been invaded by like people writing bad checks In the beginning it was like elan's coming on this that and the other thing Now it's just like, you know people who embezzled money from their husbands fucking

You know marina are now on clubhouse Trying to learn from ty lopez Some bullshit fundraiser for a dead kid What'd you say some fundraiser for a dead kid? Yeah people just stealing your kid's cancer money or on clubhouse Well, all right folks see you on clubhouse. Goodbye