The Tim Dillon Show - 257 - Bomb Energy

Starting point is 00:00:00 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon show. Happy Father's Day. I'm calling my father for the first time on the show We haven't spoken in a few months. Both of us very busy and We're calling him for the first time on the program. Very excited about that. Have you do you call your father tomorrow? Yeah, I'll see my dad actually does Hunter Biden call his father tomorrow. I bet he does Hunter Biden is Joe Biden's son. He's the the Roger Clinton The Wild Brother Kind of the black sheep the Neil Bush as you would say of the family

Starting point is 00:00:40 Reading an article now from the New York Post. It says Hunter Biden called Asians quote yellow in Text exchange with cousin, but the text exchange is a little creepy. It's weird. Yeah, and people are speculating. They're saying is this human trafficking This is the text exchange And do we know who Hunter is? Is he the blue? He's the blue. I believe so this is the text exchange Somebody says she's a legend. None of these women are except for diva DVA deva diva, but Nikola and deva and Ella and Lucy and All know quality girls who like I am are distrusting and highly highly wary of evil. I

Starting point is 00:01:23 Also have Denise a German 26 Somebody writes no to Lucy. I think that's what Hunter Hunter Hunter writes no to Lucy somebody writes. Okay, so fine Do you want foreigner domestic? Hunter goes and you have to make the pitch directly This is Hunter. I Can't give you a bleep Engage and sorry, I'm not doing it Hunter goes domesticated foreigner is fine Then the person says I'd give you Isabella, but she has kids and

Starting point is 00:01:56 an NBA ex-husband and Then hunter Biden goes no yellow And somebody goes yes Mina and that's it Do we know what this is? I mean this might somebody might just be setting them up with an escort It's speculative, but this is from Caroline Biden. I cousin. I don't know if it's human trafficking. It could be just an Escort it could be human trafficking. We don't know and what is Caroline Biden is leaking this I think this is all from Hunter's laptop. They were covering all the text. Where is this laptop? I don't know. Where is it? I don't know. I mean this guy. Let's be very honest is

Starting point is 00:02:37 fun I Guess the Daily Mail has it looks like it They have the laptop looks like it so this guy for people that don't know abandoned the laptop to get it fixed In Delaware in Delaware, and he wasn't thinking because he uses drugs and Everything is apparently on this laptop I mean UFO footage human trafficking the nuclear codes the launch codes I mean supposedly everything that you could ever want to know about any conspiracy is somehow on this laptop I'm obviously being facetious about that, but there aren't some things on the laptop

Starting point is 00:03:16 He probably doesn't want out so the Daily Mail has his laptop His cousin's attractive, huh? Yeah, he'd fuck his cousin You know that thought has crossed his head Hunter and the cousin So now he says Racial slurs because he's a crack addict. Yeah, so but now now let's consider this is the problem with You know rabid political ideology is that now conservatives are trying to cancel this crack head Based on text messages. He sent while he was smoking crack So that's what conservatives are doing instead of going we got we kind of got duped by Trump the Q and on movement

Starting point is 00:04:00 It's not doing great It's seen better days We kind of got duped the immigration of the board is worse than it's ever been Online censorship is is ratcheting up. We'll talk about that later No, none of the goals were really accomplished during the Trump administration when you had Republican Congress and Senate and Whatever quote-unquote whatever you want to call it the cancel culture the blah blah blah uh on

Starting point is 00:04:28 Universities and in corporate America has seemingly gotten worse That being said Republicans in order to fight that have decided To find instances where hunter-biden the president's crackhead son has used racial slurs He called his white attorney the n-word. He called his white attorney the n-word That's how conservatives are trying to get back in power By proving that hunter-biden a crack addict has said the n-word. We know he has I mean I'm more interested in what the fuck was going on in the text thread

Starting point is 00:05:08 I mean, maybe they're just setting him up with an escort. I'm all for that But it's very interesting when he goes you want foreign or domestic. That's cute But it does sound interesting and he goes I'd give you Isabella, but she has kids Well, I don't know why does that matter if it's her job, right? Something's going on What is what do you mean? I'd give you Isabella, but she has kids and Don't go cueing on like oh, he's trying to make it disappear. I don't really think that's happening I think what he's probably trying to do is he wants a chick and

Starting point is 00:05:51 Maybe he just said I don't want anyone with kids. Maybe he specified that Like I want an escort that doesn't have children although I don't feel like hunter-biden is making is that drawing that moral line in the sand, but I don't know Maybe hunter-biden is saying hey I can't get off if I know she's got kids at home and an NBA ex-husband So that's another thing you go I could get you but I don't want So he's a big deal. He's a little famous ex-NBA husband So maybe you can't fuck around with her and hang out. She's got kids in an NBA

Starting point is 00:06:25 It could get real sticky. I think that's what the guy's telling him This could be a sticky situation if I say you up with this chick It's not gonna be good your dad's trying to be the president or Thinks he might be the president. So this is not good. So Hunter goes no yellow And it's racist and he's also, you know, I don't know I don't know what's going on here But I know that There no one cares about any of this and I don't really care about any of it either I don't care what hunter-biden. I

Starting point is 00:07:03 Mean you could turn up anything about hunter-biden. I would not be shocked like there would be no story About hunter-biden that at this point would currently Throw me off my access access like if you told me if you said hey, so they found on hunter-biden's laptop that hunter-biden Was actually the reason the reason that that Malaysian plane went down It was him and he parachuted out. I would go What they go remember the Malaysian plane that just that was hunter-biden There's a video of it on his laptop. He's parachuting out and I go. Oh, all right

Starting point is 00:07:49 Like there's there's there's no huge like There's no like shock and awe This is a crack addict when someone is doing crack. You imagine they're gonna be involved in Hijinks That's what he was involved in some hijinks and some Tom Fullery you'd imagine that he's a smoking crack Had disappointing to be smoking crack and to not

Starting point is 00:08:18 Be getting escorts and he should have the pig of the litter Um What is so weird the guy goes I can't give you blank Asian. Sorry. I'm not doing it And you and the hunter goes you have to make the pitch strike. It's such a weird way to get an escort It's such an odd way When Hunter goes you have to make the pitch directly which I kind of understand hunters like listen, I don't want to Pit you have to pitch this woman what I want before she's got to show up and know what the deal is How much do I owe you hunter-biden asks some some guy how much do I owe you before adding?

Starting point is 00:09:05 Because blank and word you better not be charging me Hennessy rates. I Mean Hunter oh, that was also with Caroline Yeah Places a month for the chat with Caroline asked me as a race. Okay, I Wonder why the cousin is like getting him escorts to like what it's just so well. I don't I don't know if the cousin is I don't know what's going on However hunter's father has his own history of usually racially charged language towards South Asian people

Starting point is 00:09:53 Remarking in 2006 that you cannot go to a 7-eleven or a Dunkin Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent Yeah, people forgetting that Joe Biden's been like a racist forever Like Joe Biden remember when he said He referred to the inner cities as jungles What did he mean by that? Biden's been kind of a good old boy Delaware racist forever. I mean now You know, obviously he said Obama was the first good clean Articulate black guy to run for president. This is Biden. I mean, this is what he does right?

Starting point is 00:10:29 We've all forgotten about that That's fine. You might think he was a lesser of two evils, but don't forget that Biden pops off as well and The content of the message suggests that it took place after a hundred Biden ended his relationship with Haley Biden the widow of his older brother Bo That's a special guy Who starts fucking your dead brother's wife immediately and What is her deal?

Starting point is 00:11:00 This is what I mean about these are the people running the country You know Dave Smith made a point on Rogan where it was like you had Epstein You had Hillary Clinton running for the presidency her aid Huma Abedin her aid is Was married to Anthony Weiner Sexual predator Hillary's husband is Bill Clinton sexual predator. It's like how many Sexual predators are in your day-to-day life. I Mean, that's a fair question when you look at the Bidens. What the fuck is going on

Starting point is 00:11:37 Hunter Biden smoke and crack and then starts fucking his dead brother's widow like immediately and Then after that ends. He's like getting escorts and I mean is a wild man. I Mean, I don't know But that that's what happens in These families whether it's the bushes or the Clintons or the Bidens You you don't know much about the inner dynamics of any of these families most of what you know is a completely manufactured narrative that is spun by

Starting point is 00:12:24 PR people and the media and By the time you find out who these people really are they fucked you ten different ways By the time you unearth the information that you should have had to make the decisions about Whether they should get the job or not You're in deep shit It's true by the time you figure out who George W. Bush really is you're in the two wars You've got two wars and you've lost all your civil liberties

Starting point is 00:13:06 That's what happens This is another article I love Hunter Biden's artwork. He's actually good and will be worth a lot Well drugs help He's selling some pieces for half a million. Of course. He is can you imagine the people walking around going? That's an original Hunter Biden? I get more and more Marxist every day on the show and I have make more and more money Because what I'm starting to realize is that if you have the money to spend half a million dollars on an original work of Hunter Biden Crack head and putting it up in your mansion. You maybe shouldn't have the money It's true

Starting point is 00:13:48 Also, I mean I put up a satirical thing on Instagram the other day. They take it down We send it to our friend in VC. It's a joke. I said I'm Osama bin Laden. I'm not dead I'm I'm get I'm I'm getting into an energy drink and we're entering the first round of fundraising and it's called bomb energy and You know, I did a lot of jokes. I said and Can we pull it up? You think let's read the email that Instagram took down which is clearly satirical and this is why I'm getting Frustrated everyone hates the way I say that word. I say fuck straight it But it's frustrated with capitalism because you would think capitalism was all these bad asses to go fuck you it makes money But what it really is is a lot of people that are pussies and they're rolling over

Starting point is 00:14:31 Because ten people on Twitter get offended at something. I know of all these bad asses suppose of these cold heartless capitalist they're all rolling over and And capitulating to like it used to be like this mob of weird Evangelical soccer moms that would be like we don't want Marilyn Manson performing in Pittsburgh and Now it's like fucking a few thousand people on Twitter that get angry about anything and these Billion-dollar corporations and these CEOs were the hundred million done They just roll the fuck over because they're terrified. Well, what the fuck's the point? I Mean at the end of the day

Starting point is 00:15:17 Didn't Stalin just kill these people that a problem to the gulag Maybe that's where I ideologically end up Saying well, you know what everyone gets to go to the gulag Let's pull this email up that we sent to our friend Who's a friend of ours? He's a young kid in VC and We said dear Frederick. My name is Osama bin Laden. Many people think I am dead. That is not true I'm alive and well, and I'm very excited about the energy drink space We have come up with a caffeine free antioxidant packed energy drink called bomb energy

Starting point is 00:15:55 Which promotes overall health while stimulating the consumer in a sustainable and vital manner We are beginning to raise capital and are hoping for a 9-11 launch date Which I had nothing to do with by the way We're very interested in partnering with your venture to take bomb energy to the next level Our slogan is bomb energy the Jews run the world Initial focus groups have been very responsive to this slogan mind you many of them have been done in the Arab world We're looking to potentially soften our messaging as we take bomb energy Mainstream and that is why we believe you a squishy bagel face are the right person to help us in this endeavor

Starting point is 00:16:37 We are committed to increasing our market share in the ever-expanding market of health and nutrition We thought this project would interest you a little Zionist dough boy We look forward to hearing from you and working together And then we say we also have heard positive things about Patrick Finnegan hopefully you can connect us who's a venture guy in New York who's on Clubhouse who we know and then I said best regards Osama CEO of bomb energy and Instagram took this off. I don't know why it supposedly is an algorithm that identifies words How but there's a lot of words that are criticizing Zionism, and I'm making a joke

Starting point is 00:17:14 So I guess Jews or or bin Laden. I think it's the bin Laden thing It said when they took it off it said an association with dangerous groups, right? So I Am just getting a little I'm a little I'm a little it listen. We all know capitalism as this lion's share of problems, but We never anticipated that one of them that would would be that the CEOs of companies are too sensitive and Considerate and that's my issue now. It's one of them I would like people to have health care and I would like them to afford buying a house But I would also like if you're gonna be a capitalist pig be one and tell people to shut the fuck up

Starting point is 00:17:59 Go dude the guy's got a certain amount of followers. He's a comedian. It says comedian in the thing I'm not gonna whine about this the whole episode because it's boring and we get it But they're trying to kick the wine scenes off and you know me and the wine scenes are just deeply in love with each other And here's what I'll say about the wine scenes They should I think they're smart and I think they should be able to say whatever they want to say on YouTube I don't care what they're talking about whether it's the voting or the migration patterns of bees or Whatever it is doesn't matter to me And I think they make a lot of sense when they stick to science and evolutionary biology because that's what you do

Starting point is 00:18:35 And I think they should be able to do it and I want to hear what they have to say about the vaccine and what they have to Say about ivermets or whatever the fuck it is. I I'm I'm not talking about it because I don't know anything about it I got the vaccine because I want to go to London and suck off somebody with who's uncut who has the with the When the skin is over the head of the penis and I can't do it if I'm in America well, I can't I was did it once it was not for me But I feel a British would be better and then you can have the roast have the roast on Sundays with the peas that they mash up It's not a great food country, but they have the the Indians very good the chicken tikka marsala my point is this

Starting point is 00:19:14 I wasn't like the vaccine is here I didn't change my name with vaccine on Twitter like some mentally deranged people I know I Got the vaccine because I thought I would need it to do my job and I would I will I know To go anywhere and to do anything but listen I want to know about everything and I think it's good for society when you look at how fast that Labley hypothesis went from a conspiracy to a mainstream news Where John steward is on Colbert saying hey guys He's saying the exact same thing that the Weinstein's were saying six fucking months ago to their credit

Starting point is 00:19:48 To Brett's credit and to Heather Hines credit and I have no closer friends than those two but And I like them there's a little is a little sensitive But I think they're spot-on with a lot of that stuff and they should be able to go into I don't need that I don't need expertise on everything that's ever happened But I think this is this is their fucking turf yeah, and to get them off YouTube is fucked up But no one cares so there's gonna need to be an alternative There's gonna need to be an alternative to YouTube. There's gonna need to be an alternative To a lot of these social media sites

Starting point is 00:20:21 I don't know who's gonna do it or who's gonna come up with it But there's gonna be after it's gonna have to be an alternative and they gotta be 20 million dollars Can we get Spotify on the phone by the way? Can we get them on the phone right now because I'm a little I'm a little heated we have the core daddy girl gets 60 million dollars To talk about anal Joe Rogan gets a hundred million dollars to talk about aliens and Bigfoot and Tim Dillon Who is really covering everything? gets nothing The greatest podcast right now that Tim Dillon show has been offered zero dollars from Spotify zero zero dollars

Starting point is 00:20:57 But we've got Joe Rogan and that call her daddy Alex So what I'd like to do is I'd like to call Spotify and I would like to request $20 million and that's what the show is worth. Yes when we've done the metrics We had a lot of people listening here So I would like to 20 million dollars from spot. Is there no number we can call number now Why can't we call because they don't have people working? And it's just an email that they get back to you like years later. This is absurd I'm trying to see if I can find a foreign number to call call them in Sweden where that guy lives the CEO. I

Starting point is 00:21:35 Think he lives in Switzerland or Sweden or something. Should we go there? Maybe we should just go there. I'm talking to an attractive guy from Holland. She's got blonde hair He speaks funny. He sounds like a fish Um All that in is this bridge all that okay, see if they answer that your phone to call that I've had enough of not getting what I want But my point is that you shouldn't have with the kind of disposable income where you and who wants Hunter Biden's fucking artwork That junkie He's moved to LA. He's what is it? What did he what does he paint his dead brothers widows puss?

Starting point is 00:22:12 What is he painting? This is the article Hunter Biden laying low in LA starting art career with shady dealer. I gotta be honest is it is hard not to like him I'm trying not to like him. Can you dislike him? No, it's very difficult to dislike him It's very difficult. He's in LA where we'll be back there eventually in the fall and that maybe we'll get him on the show And he's he's becoming an artist great He's doing impressionist work Let's let's see if we could get through to these people because quite frankly or code you have dialed is incorrect What is that?

Starting point is 00:22:52 That's the Spotify general info number Thanks. Fuck them We're taking our show off Spotify. I think oh really I think we're gonna do that We have a lot of listeners on there. Yeah, but there's a lot of people side I think that's the best thing to do. Okay, because then maybe they'll give us a big offer, which they won't but Well It seems like when the shows go to Spotify, they're not as big is that true. I Know one guy at Spotify, but he just quit so we could call him though. Who Mike? Who is he?

Starting point is 00:23:23 He's he's over at a different company now, but he was at Spotify. Can you call him? Yeah? Yeah, call on. I'll call him They call him right now. I Want 20 million dollars? You find his email. What if I did a podcast with Hunter Biden? Can can we call Spotify and tell them that we'll do a podcast with hunter Biden called the laptop where we go through his Laptop and we play videos of him painting all the women he's tortured. I Think that's a good idea We'll stop every now and then to read an ad for Bluetooth and then we'll go back to going over all the red rooms and hunter

Starting point is 00:24:05 Biden has spent time in You know Eli Roth hostile style taking a fucking drill to some woman's eye And we'll discuss that it's an interesting life. He's an interesting guy Okay, here's Mike You should have a podcast We should tell him if he answers he's on the show You listen to the show so doesn't mean we can record him without his consent He's not answering no one works, you know, oh, it's Saturday. I guess. Yeah. Well, what does that mean?

Starting point is 00:24:48 What does that mean money doesn't flow? Another clown Let's go to Victoria's Secret now Victoria's Secret is Getting rid of the angels and they're replacing with Megan Rapinoe the lesbian soccer player and Who Dan Carney went once for as her for Halloween and he looks like her you can't do that now anymore That'd be good upset about that probably Victoria's Secret assigned soccer World Cup winner Megan Rapinoe and actress Priyanka Chopra Jonas

Starting point is 00:25:23 Oh, she's married to Nick Jonas or one of the Jonas's Joe Jonas, maybe Victoria's Secret assigned. Yeah, we just did that The Bellaggard lingerie John is relaunched and moving away from a traditionally real thin models by introducing the VS Collective with diverse leading icons and change makers including Jonas and Rapinoe to shape the future of the brand But don't expect to see white tiger star Chopra and Rapinoe who've been a preeminent voice in the fight for women's equal pain a soccer world Posing in the firms famously flimsy barely their briefs We are told they're both being hard as spokeswoman and will instead appear on a podcast and in marketing materials for the Recovering brand so Victoria's Secret is not doing well as a brand

Starting point is 00:26:09 supposedly and they've decided that what they should do is Get rid of the angels and the attractive women and bring in women that may be attractive But are different shapes I Don't care about this really I Think with the availability of online porn I Don't know that straight men care that much about the Victoria's Secret angels, right? It seems kind of a quaint and archaic. Yeah, it seems like a quaint and cute idea, but if if

Starting point is 00:26:53 If guys can go online with a click of a finger see barely legal college girls Choke down cocks and then take shots to the face and then you know Orgies and gangbanks and chicks getting waterboarded and strangled and people bleeding on each other and scat BDSM people getting tied up choked out punched Fingered in their eye, you know people just I mean do we Does anyone really I think the war on the standard of beauty is You know not the direction I'd like to see the world go in I think it's an unrealistic standard of beauty But lots of things are unrealistic, right?

Starting point is 00:27:34 none of us are gonna have a house in the Hamptons or a Mayback, but is it do we now have to say that those things are not desirable of Course there's trade-offs to having those things Maybe you have to work harder. Maybe you have to hollow yourself out. Maybe you'll never have real friends Maybe you'll have to be skeptical of everyone around you deeply paranoid. Maybe you have to arrange your emotions In in the way that a serial killer would in order to move up the ladder and whatever Organization that's paying you the type of money to have those things

Starting point is 00:28:09 I don't know but to say That on their face a beach house in the Hamptons or a Mayback is not a nice thing to have is ridiculous And to say that a skinny body with big tits or a skinny body with a big dick is Not nice to have even though it's unrealistic for most people the idea that as it as a standard And not a standard that people have to attain, but as a standard to just look at and go, huh? That's nice. You know when you walk around a locker room and you see a guy when I was a swimmer for years And you see a guy with a big soft penis, which is rare. I mean a big soft I don't mean like Like oh, it's visible. I mean like it hangs and it just flows in the wind that when you go even a heterosexual guy goes

Starting point is 00:28:58 Yeah That might be fun to have and who knows I don't know. Maybe there's downsides to that. I'm sure there are whatever, you know Man spreading. I don't know that being said There's very few people that look at a penis like that and go well I I don't want to give that a shot and I don't mean You don't have to suck it, but I mean like having it most people looking to be late when a woman Sees another woman who's thin and has big tits perky tits you go

Starting point is 00:29:28 I would like to take that for a spin for a week. Go. You know what? I'd like to look like that for a little bit Let's see what it's like. It's the truth and Truth now is an inconvenient Al Gore, but it's it people are it's uh It's it's troubles people when you say things get a true that doesn't mean hey good-looking people a lot of times And better not as good as people that are like Decent-looking like all-day loans meaning that it's not prime credit, but it's pretty good They fuck better usually than people that are insanely good

Starting point is 00:30:01 Look because insanely good-looking people a lot of times are just there You know, they're not really givers are thinking about themselves and they're not there and there's nothing going on in their head And whatever they're not they're not passionate people. So some of these people it's not even sexual when you look at some of these things You go. I don't know if even if it's sexual some of it is but it is just a standard of beauty. I Always looked at models and I was like They're not always sexual, but there's a beauty to them and that doesn't mean that Fat people can't be beautiful and people With the scars can't be beautiful and people in wheelchairs can't be beautiful and

Starting point is 00:30:38 All of that is true and people with a flesh-eating bacteria Necrotiding fasciitis can't be beautiful or people that Don't have arms or legs. They're just kind of a torso. They can be beautiful and people that are You know dead and you're kind of having rigor mortis set in where their body is starting to rot and smells bad They can be beautiful. It's not to say that somebody who half of their face is missing because they fell asleep and their house Went on fire can't be beautiful. They can be beautiful. It doesn't mean that somebody whose eyes have been both gouged out Can't be beautiful because you can put glass ones in it doesn't mean that somebody with a fungus that has eaten the majority of their vaginal area Can't be beautiful and they had that surgery doesn't mean that it doesn't mean that somebody who is like a

Starting point is 00:31:24 Centaur which is half horse half person can't be beautiful. They have a big horse cock. You jerk it off It smells a little weird and it's furry, but they can be beautiful It doesn't mean that a fawn can't be beautiful, which is a half goat half human It doesn't mean that somebody who's a thousand pounds can't be beautiful And that has a little bit of a rash on the innards of their anus that has turned into this You know pus filled things that are very very big and they explode every time they take a shit It doesn't mean they can't be beautiful It doesn't mean somebody with the type of psoriasis that is it's almost like a dinosaur skin

Starting point is 00:31:56 The scales are and they flake off and they're so rough that they can actually cut your skin if you touch them It doesn't mean they can't be beautiful what it means Is that there's a little bit of a standard that's widely recognized as a nice look That's all we saw a gentleman today at brunch who had Was was it was not white which is nice was Hispanic and had shaggy hair Mm-hmm. It was a very nice you go. That's a good-looking person. That's a good-looking person If that person Was six or seven hundred pounds bigger than they are now it might hurt the look

Starting point is 00:32:45 It may not I Don't know but they and they weren't thin that that guy was not thin right he was like lean He was a lean there was no six pack right, but there was a leanism But I mean what I'm saying is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder That's that's my point and I and I hope Victoria's Secret figures it out I just what I think is gonna happen and there's nothing wrong with this is just the Victoria's Secret fashion shows gonna start and they're Just gonna start in wheelchairs rolling out people flesh-eating diseases and that's okay. I'm for that. I don't care I don't care. I'm for that. This affects me

Starting point is 00:33:23 Not at all it affects Hunter Biden Book of Mormon Which is do you know my second cousin wrote this or my third cousin? Oh really this guy Robert Lopez He's like kind of related to me, but really not related to me and him and his wife probably want nothing to do with me They're New York theater people theater people a Book of Mormon the Tony winning musical

Starting point is 00:33:44 Comedy by Trey Parker Matt Stone and Robert Lopez who he's the he's the music. Okay, he writes the music he wrote let it go For a trozen he wrote the music for frozen he wrote at Avenue Q The show's a revered depiction of Africans has been much discussed topic in theater circles since matters of Broadway's and trench racism took on a renewed scrutiny followed last summer's BLM protests in a people TV interview Original cast member Josh Gad asked about a potential film adaptation said I don't know that the show could open today I have the same sort of open-arm response that it did then it's not to say that it's less significant or wonderful or incredible as a musical I just think the nature of the art to adapt Isn't it a book about Mormons who are ridiculous? Yeah, these people believe in magical underwear and that the Bible was

Starting point is 00:34:34 Dictated to a guy named Joseph Smith. It was like staying in a holiday. Yeah. Yeah, so The whole musical is a brilliant satire about how insane that is correct to a degree, right? And they I guess they also There are there slightly tone deaf when it comes to Africans because it's satirizing Mormons, right who are probably Racist yeah, right That's the whole point right the whole point is for you to go look how ridiculous right look how absurd Not well, they got a point right, but that's the fear The fear is that people go there and they sit down in a Broadway theater in the middle of Manhattan and go yep They're right. They're right about black people. They're wrong about everything else

Starting point is 00:35:17 They believe about magical underwear and Joseph Smith. It was like some drunk who came up with some dump like they're wrong But all that and the temple that you have to go. Yeah, they're wrong about all that, but so It's absurd to me This is the most successful Broadway show in you know other than Hamilton and like history Book of Mormon was so Incredibly successful Nobody was upset at Book of Mormon. It was widely understood that this was a Parity of people that believed absurd things

Starting point is 00:35:48 okay, and Now people are going we have to adapt correct we have to change it It's interesting when you look at Trey Parker and Matt Stone who are probably the most brilliant satirists of our time and political social commentary nobody really does it better and People going let's change it Let's take a step back and Let's change it and I don't know it just seems like it it's never-ending and then in the Heights comes out Lin-Manuel Miranda people go

Starting point is 00:36:20 Well, it's colorism the Latin people are not Afro-Latino. I Don't know listen you know At the end of the day, it's like It's a great quote we're letting the perfect become the enemy of the good if it is good to have more representation Which I think it is it's clearly good as long as it's based on talent right and merit and finding people that are really good at What they do and not softening the entire space to where you're elevating mediocre people based solely on

Starting point is 00:36:54 You know box-checking, but if if you have people that are super talented Which in many cases they do this is a great positive thing But let's not let the perfect become the enemy of the good nothing's going to be and it's it's also whose idea is perfect We don't know what perfect is but certain people's idea of like everything has to check every box and be the most and it's like we're losing Art can't function like that It can't it just simply cannot and all the people that dismiss these concerns and go like This is all old people that are like hey I I can't go on stage and hate transgender people anymore sure there's an element of that, but I think the more

Starting point is 00:37:38 You know reasonable people are saying all these things are a net positive diversity different voices different stories things like that it matters how it's done and It matters that the art is first the comedy's first whatever you're doing happens to be first and you're not Pathologizing everything into a political statement You're making something great and including other people for no other reason than the fact that they enrich the the work and make it better It's crazy that SNL never had an Asian person on it's crazy that they didn't have a black woman I've said that black women are probably the naturally funniest group of people over a certain age usually over 40 But it's crazy that SNL, but it's all these white liberal

Starting point is 00:38:24 You know Harvard guys that all you people want to be ruled by all the time all you people they seem to escape as long as you're a tall Ivy League white guy you seem to get out of the you seem to get out of that And they everybody still you know builds a statue to you on the Temple Mount I don't cast SNL. You know, they probably had some blind spots. They certainly did But you know, we've taken it to a level here where it's you know, we're it's getting absurd You know, you know, if every single story Just has to have the most more The most marginalized people truly are dead people

Starting point is 00:39:04 Right, they're not alive They don't have the privilege of even drawing breath. So if we take this to its logical conclusion We're all necrophiliacs Because if you're alive, there's some level of privilege in being alive So if we're just gonna do if we're just going to have we're just gonna We're gonna have to put a bunch of corpses in a room and call it the Christmas story If that's what we're really gonna do Because now people are like well you have your ableist you can walk your neurotypical you're not autistic

Starting point is 00:39:42 You're cisgendered. So you're the gender that you were born as You're Straight, you're not queer You're You know, so so again, we just we're going down the line here And it just seems a little ridiculous and and we all know that and there's really no way out of it per se So that's why there'll probably be some type of There's a split happening and it's pretty big

Starting point is 00:40:11 The people that are on TV right now that have their own shows have far less followers on Twitter and Instagram than I do and other people that are online One of the reasons for that is the eyeballs are leaving TV and they're going to the internet How do people try to colonize the internet? What a word colonize. We don't know but it's coming it's coming and You see the split and the people that are on one side of the split are in a fit of rage I don't care. I can enjoy shows like hacks on HBO and say they're fun shows but a lot of the same people in that part of the entertainment business are somehow angry that there's people online that have money and that have a following and

Starting point is 00:40:58 The people in the media that work for major corporations and networks are angry that there are people that are on Substack writing and having a following so you see a theme here You see this decentralization happening and a lot of people are not happy about it there's a lot of people that are angry about it and They're going to do something they keep trying to do something the problem is the money is with us for the moment that the people want the content we have the freedom right now and It's making money because it resonates with people because we can do What within reason what we want to do and we hope it stays like that, you know, but if not

Starting point is 00:41:42 I will with hunter biden Start a podcast and it will be great Omar he's he's a lot of great takes. It's just too much of a get off my lawn energy Like a lot of his takes are good. It's just couched in a and again. It's my same thing. It's like him kimmel fallon Colbert just go. Yeah. Yeah, just go You've been around for too long. You did it. You had it We we have the same these these networks are terrified of replacing these people They try to literally sing it bombed

Starting point is 00:42:15 They try they're they're terrified They're terrified of what the new late night shows will look like because of everything I just mentioned but give me one Give Shane Gillis one give nick mollinwell. Wouldn't it be great? Wouldn't it be great? You want to see that guy that writer Sassami, do you want to see his head melt? I get a late night show Shane Gillis gets one and nick mollin gets one you want to see like just heads his head just completely melts

Starting point is 00:42:47 but We're on tour caroline sold out five shows within a few hours. We're really excited about that We've got other dates too. We've got so many the merches over sunday at midnight So today when this comes out, you've got one more day For fake business for the pink the yellow any of the fake business merch also the tim dillon show t-shirts hoodies The the flash drive just sold out 20 dollars for the flash drive. That was a little excessive um the fake business Thermos the fake business white hot

Starting point is 00:43:24 The fake business notebook is sold out and also that other thing so that okay well They're all sold out except for the shirts the real good stuff the hats Get it. I'm telling you right now. It's great for the fall I know it's party summer, but the fall is coming folks That's a killer summer shirt But the fall is coming and hunter biden's gonna pick up that rock again And he's gonna make some great art. Where do you want to be when you hear hunter biden crash his car on the middle of melrose? I want to be sitting in my fake business hoodie in the fall

Starting point is 00:43:57 Where do you want to be when hunter biden od's? I mean, dude, do you think biden they've hired your secret service to like camp out outside of his house? Look at that coffee brown tim dillon show hoodie. I like that one. Does it get better than that? What do you have planned for katie's parents? Uh, we're gonna go golfing tomorrow. Oh nice And did you tell them you're leaving? Yeah, eventually and they and what did they say? They said, uh, we know ben's worked very hard and we

Starting point is 00:44:25 Which great about these texas families. This is what I've learned about texas people I'm gonna I'm gonna give some compliments now because and by the way the only I'm never shitting on texas I'm shitting on austin, which I like texas a lot. I like dallas I like people with big hair and really cool pools and hot days and that kind of like You know that that bus boy today was like latin, but not that's the whole thing now And I don't mean but not like if you know, I'm saying it's that mixing is nice. Everybody likes it Everybody likes it. Oh the mesh potatoes and the gravy the point is What I'm saying is that these texas families stay out of your fucking business. They stay the fuck out

Starting point is 00:45:04 Long island people Are loud obnoxious nosy Just in your fucking business in your life. Your name is in their mouth All the time these texas families just by seeing ben's family and katie's family. They are just stoic ranch people And it is so important. They just let their kids live their lives. They respect them. They go We raise good kids. They're gonna go out and live their lives. We are independent. Don't you feel that? Yeah, they're like just be independent. That's great. That is a fucking texas

Starting point is 00:45:41 Long island is just this thing where they go. We want To control you and we want to give you our opinion all the time And we want and it's just fucked And I really appreciate this texas You know freedom. It's about freedom. Yeah, your aunt will call you and talk you out of decisions. You haven't even made Yeah, she'll be like, hey, if you're thinking about it, don't do this because but in fairness, I will do that to others Yeah But I'm right

Starting point is 00:46:13 I have that long island thing too where I will call people and tell them what to do and how to live But I'm correct. I guess she thinks she's right That's the problem But she's not but I am Denver comedy works I try to get tickets We're trying to open them up at full cap the 23rd through the 27th This is the only time we're going to be in Denver for a while. We're trying to open this club up

Starting point is 00:46:41 Try to get tickets keep trying because every day they're adding more tickets Raleigh, North Carolina the 8th through the 10th New York City, Carolina sold out 15 to the 17th Boston, Massachusetts, Wilbur theater. There are some tickets left July 21st through the 23rd Foxwood's casino in Connecticut There are tickets left on the 24th a few of them Irvine we're adding shows keep checking even if you heard or saw that one of them is sold out Capacity is constantly being updated tickets are constantly being added Irvine, California the 29th through the 31st

Starting point is 00:47:18 San Diego California the 12th through the 14th American comedy called Las Vegas. That's a music festival So if you're if you're there at the festival, you want to buy a ticket to that? I'm doing an hour there um Why is that on there twice? Because you're also doing the I think you're doing two shows you're doing House of Blues and then you're doing this as well Am I I think I thought it was one show Well, we'll have to figure that out

Starting point is 00:47:45 We'll call our agent he's uh Probably at brunch He's at Tory Pines right now. Oh, yeah, what watching you was open. Yeah, you're so jealous You just hear like it's very quiet on the green and then you just hear him with a potato chip And Who are the other old they like Brooks Capcom over there? Yeah, Brooks. Bubba Watson. Yeah here on the green And we're just we're just waiting It's our agent eating

Starting point is 00:48:15 Chicago, Illinois the 24th through the 28th. We're trying to open that up to lorry life for Tamanus grab tickets to that Thursday September Baltimore the 23rd through the 25th Milwaukee October 7th through the 9th, and then we got other stuff as well that we're taking a little sabbatical I think and Then we're going to start our move back to the What is california cold the sunshine golden state the golden state? Yeah, and then uh carolines that it sell out completely

Starting point is 00:48:48 I believe caroline just sold out complete also. I'll be at Joe Rogan's comedy extravaganza the club in Austin Joe Rogan's comedy hut. It is me the lineup is sick. It's me Brody Stevens gary shanling Joan rivers It is an insane and bob shimmel So it's robert shimmel gary shanling jone rivers brody stevens and tim dillon at uh Joe Rogan's comedy hut in austin Now let's you know, I have not spoken to my father in almost three months So for father's day, I thought it'd be very nice to call my father on the show

Starting point is 00:49:23 Let's give him a ring and we'll see what happens I'm not spoken to my dad in two months. It's almost three Hey spot Hi god You caught me at the weirdest time Oh my god, my slave is here and he's like let's just grab that. He's being dominatrix. It's insane. Hold on one second Oh my god, he wants me still on this neutral bullet Oh my god, yeah

Starting point is 00:49:55 Hi Hi dad. Happy father's day. How are you? I slept. Well, I'm doing pretty bad. I just stuck here with my slave And he's with the script and he's being my dominatrix It's insane So I don't understand. So he you usually dominate him. My god. Yes I he's tired of the slave. He's being fucking crazy right now Oh my god, he wants me to sit on this neutral bullet again. Do you want me to get you to do it?

Starting point is 00:50:25 Should I do it? I mean his father's day This is crazy. Happy. Oh my god. He's such a sweetheart for calling. Hold on one second. Oh my god. By the way, how school Hold on one second. Nice to see you. Oh my god. Oh my god. Anything. I'm so scared. It's a big cup. Okay. Hold on Oh Yes Oh It's like Alyssa Milano's asshole in here. Oh my god. It's fun though. Thank you so much for calling

Starting point is 00:50:56 I mean, I'm so how are you? It's good. Is this safe? Is everything you're doing safe? Oh my god, please. Don't worry. This happens all the time here. Holy He just hit me in the asshole with a pan. Oh my god. This is crazy This is like a service that you you have come to your home Oh my god. Yes. Listen enough about me. How are you? How's Austin? Do you like it? You know, it's an adjustment. I think I'm going back to la. I think it's more my speed beautiful What do you say it's beautiful in Austin in the talent there? Oh my god Timothy jay give it a chance. I I don't think I can

Starting point is 00:51:36 I don't my god. He went I am not putting that down the garbage compactor Oh my god Timothy, is this a bad time? No Why don't I call you back? It's a great time. Uh, I just want to wish you happy father You know, we hadn't talked in a while. I wanted to make sure that everything was okay This is it. Oh my god, Timothy. It's your high school trophy. I cherish that. No That's it on it. Is this okay, Timothy? Yes, if you have to do it, you can do it

Starting point is 00:52:15 We've got a little but I have to he's he's in charge. I'm supposed to want to charge this insane. Oh my god He did so good on the soccer tournament Okay, I've got the head I'm down by the way. Oh, Timothy. I'm so sorry. I know you love this We'll clean it up. Oh god. Well, I'm glad you're having a good weekend Thank you so much for calling. It's so sweet. And I'm I hope you and you know, this Power dynamic between you and the dominatrix. I hope you guys figure that out Oh my god, I hope it's flipped at some point

Starting point is 00:52:54 Thank you so much for calling and thank you for the flowers. It's so sweet. Yes. Well, well, well, you're you're I appreciate it and give them to your wife Oh my god, I have to go, Timothy, but god bless you for calling Thank you Thank you. That is my father Um He seems well He seems like he's doing he's doing the right thing and you know, um You know, hey

Starting point is 00:53:34 Just happy did he's doing well. Yeah, he seems good He's very good Okay, well, happy father's day to everyone out there and I hope your dad is having as much fun as mine

The Tim Dillon Show - 257 - Bomb Energy

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