The Tim Dillon Show - 297 - The Lodge From Hell

Episode Date: May 8, 2022

Live from the Daintree Rainforest, Tim and Sam Tallent and Ben have had a horrible stay at a remote resort, weigh in on Bobby Lee vs Brendan Schaub, and discuss the controversy that is Roe v Wade. See Sam live on the road here and buy his book: https://www.samtallent.com/ Follow Sam here: https://www.instagram.com/samtallent/ Bonus episodes every week: ▶▶ https://www.patreon.com/thetimdillonshow See Tim Live on the road: ▶▶ http://timdilloncomedy.com/#shows ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: EVERY MAN JACK ▶▶ https://www.everymanjack.com to get 20% off your first purchase use code DILLON 👨‍🦱 HAIR LOSS: ▶▶ https://www.keeps.com/TimDillon MASTERWORKS ▶▶ https://masterworks.art/tim 🎧 HEADPHONES: For 15% off! ▶▶ https://www.buyraycon.com/tim 💆THERAPY ▶▶ https://www.betterhelp.com/TIMD ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃: 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timjdillon/ 🐦 Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/TimJDillon 🌍 Tim Dillon Live Dates!: http://timdilloncomedy.com/#shows 📹 Subscribe to the channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC161r7ShBvMxfyzCtiSMRbg Listen on Spotify! https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1woKiAazAKPWPkHjds  ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ ▶▶ Ed McMahon [e-mail] https://www.instagram.com/benaveryisgood/ https://twitter.com/benaveryisgood ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ #TheTimDillonShow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ladies and gentlemen welcome to the Tim Dillon show what's going on with Brendan Shab and Bobby Lee Well, what's happening well, I saw Bobby and Kaila went on the H3H3 What's going on Looks like there's some accusations what's happening What's the 411 What's the deal There they're in a fight they're in a feud right now why some accusations are being thrown at Brendan who done it Who said what who what why when where what's going on

The podcast community is flipped upside down right now over it's fucking wild But I want to get some straight answers How can I do my job? How can I continue to do my job without getting to the bottom? Is this why they're overturning Roe v Wade? Because of Kaila any Letterman Brendan Shab Bobby Lee Roe v Wade What's going on Amy Coney Barrett Chief Justice John Roberts Bobby Lee Brendan Shab Kaila

Joe Biden the economy Jews Catholics Protestants Muslims Bobby Lee H3H3 Can you get some fucking answers? Yeah? Yeah, so it's your job people on the internet are saying here He's a bully why I think he's made inappropriate passes at women I mean to be specific here on the pod would fill in fair constitutes a woman

Really Like no, it's a real question in this case a lady with a pussy and titties Well, I don't want you to start being vulgar. I don't think that's your job to start being vulgar right now We're talking about a serious issue. I want you to really kind of like You know, you're at work half the time with you, you know, you forget you're at work. You can't start throwing out Vulgarities, this isn't a blue show. We don't work blue here. I apologize This is a news show and the news I'm covering is Bobby Lee Brandon Shab

Annie Letterman Kaila Esther Bavitzky Roe v Wade What's going on? I have a clip here a viral clip here of Bobby Lee exposing Brendan Shab and his goons for the bullies They are Wait, Brandon Shab has goons. Yeah. Yeah, there are goons. I think there are goons involved I'm let me tell you right now folks, I just went to the rainforest to this hotel, which I am I'm really Gonna I mean, you know, I

I I'm I'm not gonna listen I'm just gonna really let people know What the problem and and and I mean plural problems are here there are many and It's unfortunate because I spent a lot of money for this And I'm unhappy and I'm I'm well within my rights to be unhappy But I'm Trout and and there are Indigenous tribes

All over this area. It's the world's oldest rainforest It's a hundred and eighty million years old and you see them you see these people and I'm running up to them and Going what the fuck is going on with Bobby Lee and Kaila and They're pretending. They don't know They don't speak English and I'm going do you understand what's happening with Annie Letterman and I don't know what they're doing Gathering fruit. It's not my business, but I've been spending all of my time here

Trying to tell them About this thing and I don't even know what it is. I Feel so disconnected So what's going on again? There are goons. I Think we should random Shab's got a pirate ship of goons and they're going after Bobby Lee. Is it because he's Korean? Is he Korean? I don't think it's a race thing, but he is Korean. Yeah, right. I was right about that I do know some things, but I feel so out of everything. I don't feel included anymore I'm like on the outside. I'm a victim of my own success

It's very hard to stay Connected to the issues of the day When I'm out here in the rainforest trying to lead these people to Christ now Play this clip of Bobby Lee I cannot cover this folks many people don't want me to cover it Right, right people don't want me to cover it, but I have to cover it because it's the news This is big news Is the results of whatever this is now gonna be there's no results because

I'm I can call Shab right now and we could be like all this squared away and everything is fine because we've already talked about it The promise was that he would never talk about it again And the next day he went on flagrant to and then talked about it even though it was in a complimentary way Yeah, in a complimentary way. I don't feel like we said anything bad about him either. The point is did was there Was there a text Alluding to possibly suing people. Yes, there was did it did it freak me out and did it make me think? Oh shit like such a small thing to sue over but was there a lot of misunderstanding from his team and us? Yeah, and but we talked it through but the truth is the truth and

You know, it's all squared away. So you guys are just gonna get this clear So you guys were talking about there was this comedian that people assumed was him Yeah, that was trying to pick up all you girls kind of a sleaze whatever right? So he calls you and says Bobby Get your get your woman in line. I mean what kind of fucking animal does that that's fucked up Why did you call you he has your number, right? I would say it was your fucking podcast Who the fuck why what the fuck is that shit? It was not just him There was a whole barrage. It was it was the name. I'm not gonna but it was a phone call with other podcasters and

It was bullshit. I was logged you bro. Not flogged me. They threatened my career They called me a coward a pussy. You've always been a pussy And and black man, they said they would expose me They said that all these things and I was in Oklahoma Shooting another shell and I was at dinner and I was by myself and I was getting it was very traumatic for me And it was based on whatever they did on the live now imagine now what's gonna happen with now this It's good you said that I think it's good Who are they

This is my question. Mm-hmm He said it's a bunch of goons Well, it's in I think it's implied right they don't name them specifically But it's implied the the people he kind of hangs out with in the podcast world. Oh Well Man did I miss this scandal? I Missed it. I feel bad Brendan has always been very nice to me my experiences with him are overwhelmingly positive

I should note and I don't think this will be a surprise to anyone and it won't be a surprise to Brendan Brendan is not the heir to Richard Pryor he's not and I don't know that there is an heir to Pryor maybe Chappelle But it's not Brendan, right? Is that fair? Can I say that without ruffling feathers and it doesn't mean that Brendan isn't funny on that show, right? He's he's good on the show like people like him. I I don't I've never seen his stand-up. He's a he's a very like

controversial figure and I Just believe that There's so much drama and there's not enough love Going around isn't that the way you feel? because It's it's fair to say that Brendan is new at stand-up

He's very new very new yeah, and it takes years and years to become a good stand-up and sometimes it doesn't happen Sometimes it doesn't happen sometimes the diet doesn't work a lot of people die fat You see The things we want R&O is the things we get I love a T. Nobody pronounces a T get Why don't we do that? now Brendan may go on to be the greatest comedian that has ever lived

That is a possibility. I do not know that But I don't know that it's fair To say that he's got a goon squad running around and intimidating People but maybe he does But I don't know that that's the case, but when Bobby Lee says they The people and it's ominous

But there could be I don't know it's not my experience with him Brendan has been overwhelmingly nice to me he's never made an inappropriate pass at me and That shows tremendous amount of restraint on his part. I have missed this scandal completely I am I spend most of my time with venture capitalists Entrepreneurs Philanthropists I don't spend a lot of time with comedians because they're stupid and poor That's the only reason I don't spend time with them because they are dumb and they don't have means which makes it very tough And Brendan's rich. I guess he is he seems rich seems to have money

Bobby's kind of rich too, but I don't spend time with any of these people because I don't really want to and It's done a knock on them. They're colleagues, right? Mm-hmm. I've never done a tiger belly. I've been asked a few times. We had to reschedule. I Just I don't care about doing other people's shows anymore. I just want to do my own I just hope everyone finds a pathway to love Because it's not overrated it isn't find a pathway to love goddamn it What's life really about fighting over this silliness is craziness who tried to throw whose wife into the car It's not a big deal. Why do we got to keep going over this?

People are so fast and loose with the truth. Mm-hmm So that's my statement. I'm agnostic, but I have to cover it It's the news the same way I have to cover Roe v. Wade. I'm unaffected by Roe v. Wade I haven't had an abortion in a year But I'm gonna cover it Because you know this country is headed towards a Real crazy Christian

Theocracy or A like San Francisco style Improv theater either one makes me unhappy I very much want a cold somewhat emotionless bureaucratic state Curtis Yarvin's not wrong about all these things, you know I don't love the idea of just one centralized authority But his idea that things have to be sort of cold and somewhat bureaucratic and boring. I find I

Don't know Better than this current hot blooded Screamfest where all the values are on the table all the time and all the people have to fight And I just I hope the best for Brendan and Bobby and Annie and Kali live never met any of these people I've never met any of them I'm too rich I Don't know

Stand-ups a weird thing and I know the brandy gets a lot of hate because a lot of people feel that He when people get in to stand up later in life And Are not good at it it bothers people but he's trying very hard and I'm sure he's gotten better And You know listen again, I Think the guy he's making a buck. He's making more than a buck, right? He's making a little change

Is he gonna win the Mark Twain Prize for humor? Probably not But that's okay Stand-up's just been polluted by garbage for years Sam talent is with us. He's written the foremost book on stand-up What do you think about? This phenomenon we have where MMA people or whoever they happen to be are Doing comedy and and people are upset about it. They're angry. I stand with Brendan. I

Stand with the guy who could do the most physical damage to me and that's Brendan in this case I fear him not because of any allegations just how good he is with his hands and his feet So, yeah, Brendan, I'm with you brother. I kind of like him Me too. Yeah, I do. It's yeah. Here's the thing I'm supposed to hate him which makes me like him. Mm-hmm. Yeah, right? Yeah, totally I Mean he's always been a gentleman to me Truly, yeah, he's always been lovely to me You know and I I think that

Just to be diplomatic about it You know when it gets to the men woman stuff and the boys and the girls and The parking lots and the cars and who owns a pickup truck who doesn't own a pickup Yeah, who's going where and who ghost me in the hall? I try not to get involved. It's none of my business Well, you're above it. You don't need it. Well, I do need a goosing It's actually untrue. I'm not above a goosing and I need a goosing And I'm gonna say this if Brendan Schaub threw me against the wall the comedy store and started to make out with me I just shut up about it. I

Wouldn't run my mouth all over town And I'm not saying he did that to anyone. I don't even think that's being alleged But I'm saying that if if Brendan Schaub raped me I mean violently if Brendan grabbed me and raped to the point where I was worried about my own innards if he raped me, I mean took my head and And I mean I've bitten a pillow before and that's a shock to no one But I mean biting it where it's permanently damaged

saliva flowing out of my mouth in an uncomfortable way. I could smell the blood If he destroyed my asshole to the point where I couldn't shit For weeks or shit too much Whatever the problem was if if Brendan Fucked me to the point where I had to see a doctor and the doctor's first response was what Happened to you If my bedroom looked like the first 48

with blood and shit all over if my bedroom looked like a murder scene and Again, if it was non-consensual I Would keep my mouth shut Because I want the focus to be on the work I want the focus to be on the work. I Don't want people looking at me and going. Oh, that's the comic Brendan ain't only raped I want the focus to be on the work now I

Just think I don't know but this mention of goons and they and them and they're coming and it's people I don't know. I like Bobby too. I mean, you know, I Didn't dinner with him. I didn't love when I moved to Austin and he was like you owe the comedy store so much Why would you turn your back on LA? I'm like, what are you talking about? The only reason I got passers cuz Joe Rogan ordered them to pass me. That's the way things work I didn't develop at the fucking comedy store. I don't care what happens to the comedy store I don't care what happens to the comedy seller. Yes, they're great places to work. They're great institutions and And and I have friends at work there and I work at the store

And I'm very happy that I'm able to work at the store is a big moment in my career to get past at the comedy store But make no mistake the reason I got passed was because Joe Rogan made a phone call So I don't romanticize this so I had a dinner with Bobby and I didn't love that me Spade and Bobby had a dinner and Bobby's kind of like don't you feel like you got inducted into the mafia? Now you're like turning your back on the mat and I'm like, what are you? What are you? What are you even saying with your mouth? I Didn't love I mean me and him are not friendly, but I mean we're friends ish. I See him. He's funny. He's a colleague. I respect him

What Sam what are you pointing out? Is it an animal? It was a bit of one of those pendulums. Yeah, they're all over now These fat little rats Ben was telling me a fun story about Bobby Lee What about it Ben? Did he rape you? No No, I was just I was just mentioning offhand to Sam that I believe he shows his asshole on stage I've heard as that's what you're talking about right Sam. Not the other thing. Yeah, that's right, and that's fun Good for him. Mm-hmm. I Just don't understand the beef and the drama and the anger and hatred all I would like is love pathways to love and healing

That's what I want for everyone involved But I don't care about any of them Do you understand what I mean? Yeah, of course, but that's the isn't that that's I feel like the most honest way to put it Yeah, I don't care about any of them, right, but I would I hope they're okay If you were to say that you're deeply affected by all this I'm unaffected. Yeah, I'm really unaffected. You're in the rain for it I'm unaffected and I don't care. I'm in a rain forest. I It's on it's it doesn't matter to me. I don't care Who did what to whom and how allegedly allegedly allegedly? It doesn't mean anything to me

But everybody's like, what do you think about this? I'm getting calls from the states. Oh What do you think way in I? Just personally no Then if I was brutally raped By Brendon shop even if it wasn't right if it was just rough stuff if he was heavy-handed Well, I imagine that it would be I Believe it'd be the type of rape that I consented to You can consent to rape

That's another thing people don't realize like for example Maybe he cornered me and said hey, do you want to get raped and I was like, yeah, maybe and I felt threatened and scared and then I drove him to my apartment and Opened the door and allowed him to rape or maybe I was so traumatized I Instructed or forced him to rape me

Somehow I don't know but if I was brutally raped Brutally and viciously right. Mm-hmm. I would probably keep my mouth shut because I'd want people to focus on the work And isn't that the problem in the business? Because people are just living in bubbles of fear And it's wrong, but I don't care about this or anyone involved. I Hope I've covered it to everyone's satisfaction. I'm not friends with anyone involved. I like any letterman. I'm friends with her But it's what it is here, right? It is what it is. I hope everyone's respected and that's what it is Yeah

Maybe it wouldn't have happened if they all moved to Austin, Texas How about that? Because everything is love in Austin, Texas. We have a thriving economy of back alley abortions and shootings But that's my statement I'm going on the record fearless unafraid. I Just have to get that out there putting it out there my official statement on this is I do not care about anyone involved And I really don't know what happened I don't want to find out it doesn't matter to me

At all when I go to the comedy store and I stand in the parking lot and people talk to me. I want to kill myself I Never had less fun than what I'm doing that in that place. I have Zero opinion on this and I really don't care about anything no shade to the store. It's a great fucking room But I just don't give a shit. I don't care and That's all I'm saying and I hope that I Hope that people take that and and love life

I'm very upset About the experience that I'm having right now At the end of my stay in Australia, which has been largely positive The audiences we brought Sam out here at the end. He did two shows one really good one. I mean fine The audiences have been largely they've been really amazing Aussies are great Audiences because comedy is for drunk people who don't overthink things So guess what?

There is a plethora of that here. I Said to myself we are in Australia Let's go see a part of it for a few days before we leave I did a cursory amount of research not a lot and I booked myself the perpetually ungrateful Benjamin and the always grateful and lovely Sam talent a Room the finest room at the and I don't want to hurt anyone's business here But the silky Oaks Lodge in the Dainty rainforest Okay, we got the pavilion suite, which is I believe seven thousand a night Australia

Maybe five thousand or fifty three hundred a night American. Okay, three nights a $15,000 commitment The room is nice. We're in the rainforest. It has a private pool. I have no beef with the room but Let's talk a little bit about the staff I want to mention a woman named Lauren first because I want to say to the people that will this will eventually get to the people at the

Silky Forest Shed and They will hear this and they will hear it Because someone will tell them it may be tomorrow. It may be in three months. Someone will go remember the fat guy Well, he talked about us on this thing They could also be listening to it right now because their dorms are behind us. Well good, but They'll be like remember him He's called podcast and then they're gonna go. What's a podcast?

They go where slot radio, but on the computer What's the computer? It's where you get to porn and I want to single out this woman who is a lovely woman She is a waitress She's coming up here and she was phenomenal the only reason I am not burning this place down Is because of this woman who I thought did a phenomenal job serving some of the worst food I've had in my life

Trying to put a happy face And you know bless these people here. They're children of God, but they just you know, they say it's gourmet and it's fine dining I mean, it's really it's a nightmare. There was no reason for the food to be as bad as it is. They don't have any room service You can't get any room service. You've got to go to the goddamn lodge The other problem is there are activities in this area that will all kill you There are jellyfish the size of a penny that can kill you. There are large jellyfish There are saltwater crocodiles. There are sharks There is the glimpy glimpy a tree that if you brush into it send shards of glass through your system

There are platypuses everything can kill you and of course they all encourage you to do these activities and as soon as you google them You realize how deadly they are But these people obviously the tourism industry will not survive here the small tourism industry that there is I mean people want to snorkel the Great Barrier Reef Which I wanted to do but I realized it's not worth dying for because the reef is like half bleached anyway that shit's over and They give you these stinger suits we talked about it on the patreon Being a bigger person and trying to like squeeze into a stinger suit

It's like just let me die and these stinger suits are supposed to protect you from the jellyfish But a lot of them don't even do that But you know because of the tourism industry they they just you know people die here and people get hospitalized pretty frequently But they just kind of ignore it. They go. Hey, it is what it is. I get it. I Understand it's like certain. You know if you go into Chicago when you go. Hey, is it safe? They go. Yeah, it's great. Come on in Sure, you could be walking down the Miracle Mile and you could get Descended upon by a gang of teenagers that beats living shit out of you in front of your wife completely emasculates you But they're not gonna tell you that if you call the peninsula and this ain't the peninsula

But my point is that mums the word on the deaths Here can you bring up the article about the zipline Ben? Yeah, I got it right here So widow sues Daintree zipline company engineers for millions after husband falls to death. This is a September of 2021 So the wife of a man who died after plunging from a zipline in far North Queensland has launched a multi-million dollar lawsuit against those She holds responsible Adelaide father of three Dean Sanderson 50 died after the zipline He was attached to failed while high above the Daintree rainforest in October of 2019 His wife Shannon who was in a separate harness but launched at the same time Also felt approximately 10 meters at the jungle surfing canopy tours and survived despite serious injuries

Now I read another article about this and the people that were on the zipline line Said it was crazy because the zipline went out and then there was just a sound of the zipline coming back without a person Oh, and then they just heard the wife and they said it was a blood-curdling scream She's laying on the floor of the jungle going Yeah, it says the twang when the zipline came back up made an awful noise Then there was just silence for what seemed like forever. Well, you know who's responsible for that truly If you think about it who Brenda chow What I'm saying here is that it's a deadly environment we went to one of the most remote locations of the world Cape Tribulation

Mm-hmm. I mean as Ben said in one of his rare lucid and meaningful thoughts that it was What did you say been like a beach from Robbins and Caruso like the idyllic image? Oh, I said it's a platonic ideal of a beach like it could only exist inside your own mind and then you step into it It's such a surreal experience. It is surreal. It is surreal. You're welcome. It's so beautiful. You can't see it Yes, it is surreal. You're welcome now You also saw one of the little animals you like today a pat a melon They changed the pronunciation of it, maybe it's a putt a melon Pat and you also saw what do you call it?

And a kid the porcupine on a kid. No, it's basically a porcupine. Yeah, but it give lays eggs and it has a mole that lays eggs And as I ever get tired from making people's dreams come true fair question the answer is no, I'm indefatigable but This beach you can't swim because there's crocs and jellies and they'll kill you and at night There's wild boar and then if you make it through all of that there are Grifters living in a woods. I don't mean grifters in this sense that they have shows on the daily wire I mean like they're people that live in tents in the woods That are will kill you if the flora and the fauna and everything else doesn't kill you

Yeah, last chance hobos last chance of us so But it is stunningly beautiful land before time prehistoric shit. There's crocodile infested rivers It is cool to be in a place this deadly That being said to do any of these things I love freedom and I hate rules and we are in a nanny state and that is baked into the bones of every human being That walks this continent they like rules and they want everything to be done for them They like things planned for them

They like knowing when they should eat how they should eat where they should go What's the approved boat the approved tour we left a tour? We walked off a tour because we were driven enough by the way they like to book everything to this resort They want to book it. They want to get the kickbacks Okay, so as soon as you walk in first of all as soon as you walk in they start asking you Well, what your flight number is when you're leaving so that they can get Transportation because this is remote as fuck and we tried to get a car in the town to get better cigar You can't even get a car in the town. So as soon as you walk in here, they're like, here's the plan. Here's breakfast

Here's lunch. Here's dinner. Here's the tour you're gonna go on and I'm like, hey man And and when are you leaving and I'm like, hey slow the fuck down here. I just like freedom. I like to relax There's nothing relaxing about rules There's no in-room dining. You can't just go. Yeah, I'm just chilling. Maybe I'll order a burger to the room There's none of that as you show up for a formal dinner of shit food And everybody who's in this area is running from something and this is we bribed the local woman Who didn't have a driver's license to drive us around lovely woman named. Uh, what's her name? Zona Zona and uh She was a lovely woman and she told us that people are running. They owe their wives money

They're they're they're uh, they're on the run from the law And you see it in the waitresses the faces here outside of lauren Many of them are human trafficking victims and they're they've trafficked themselves To the far the far north reaches of queensland australia So that they can serve gruel to these morons who buy Uh, you know this fucking jungle experience or whatever the hell this thing is It's not even You know the wildlife here you barely see it and if you see it you're dead

Nature really is kind of fake when you think about it like you don't you rarely see it You know, so the whole thing from stem to stern Unenjoyable and the faces on these miserable people These miserable people that for whatever reason have been exiled from society and are forced to Get your flight number. What do you want the tail number of the jet? Like they're so in your business when so we went out with this uh local lovely woman And she took us around and we come back in and one of these squawking birds was like, where have you been?

I'm like, what are you my mother? What do you mean? Where have I been you bird? I've been where I want to be It's a fucking vacation, but they're crims criminals. They call them crims And what that means is that if you give the people on this continent even the the most cursory amount of freedom They remember that their lineage is as you brilliantly said horse thieves Pig fuckers pig fuckers Farmers sheep thieves. These are criminals. They cannot be allotted any freedom

Even when you go on a vacation, there's no freedom None it is a prison colony and this resort is a prison. I have been in a prison It is not at all what you would consider luxurious It is a prison. It's a gilded cage. It's a gilded cage Where they are in your business and they're in your face and all they want to know is what you're doing who you're doing it with How it was all they try to do is get in your fucking business. Well, I don't want a mommy and a daddy

I just want you to be And they said leave a comment card I'm writing on the comment card. Hey, I have one of the top podcasts in america You can listen to my review of your resort if you can get wi-fi which is horrible here Am I wrong about this sam? I mean you're here. Am I am I overstating it? I mean you let you lend yourself to comedic hyperbole typically, but no this is valid and justified They've been keeping tabs on us when you're paying $15,000 For three days to be here. Yeah, they're all over us

The woman who's been serving us food before we got lauren was dead eyed bleached out. Well, it's sticky fingers karin Well, that's not even karin. I'm talking about the gaunt woman who wouldn't make eye contact and flinch We like karin karin's fine. She was lovely, but I believe she's probably here because she had a little problem with the credit cards Oh, yeah, and she she liked to get credit cards that weren't her own You can see in their eyes that they're thieves criminals You can see the lineage in their eyes They're not clever enough to pull off any grand schemes or heists. So now they're here not getting tipped And we had to walk off a tour

Because we had this guy uh And he started the tour, but we we go to some little like Rec center, okay, and he's like you see this is what governments can do When they really put them on to it. We've treated the indigenous people very poorly But now we've got this rec center for them. And then He's like there's a lot more water trash than black trash in australia. He says i don't know about america I don't know if you have racial problems over there. It's like, of course we do and you do know that sir

As limited as you are you do know that we have racial problems. And why are we talking about genocide at 8 a.m Just show me up. What is it a padamalan a padamalan just show me a padamalan the large rat I don't want to hear about the genocide. It's eight in the fucking morning. We hadn't had coffee yet Yeah, we haven't had coffee. I don't want to do the displacement of an entire group of people Then he goes there's going to be an indigenous ceremony I'm like, wait a minute. What why are we a part of it with three white dudes? What are you talking about? You're and and and then kona zona zona. She told us she's like, yeah, it's just like a smoke ceremony And it's like you see what's a bullshit ceremony. They make like indigenous people do and like all these white fucking

tourists come in here And just have to like stay there. I'm like, hey man I don't need them dancing and putting on a show for me If they want to do like a cool indigenous ceremony or if they want to address the brandon shower bobby lee issue And they want to like somehow heal the comedy community with Communing with the spirit. That's fine. But I don't need some type of show So we had to leave the try and you knew it was happening as soon as we got on this bus with other people as soon as the doors opened I saw there was other people in there wearing shorts and safari hats

And I was like counting down in my head So How long will we make it on this first stop second stop and then as soon as I shut the door I felt the group chat buzz in my pocket and I knew we were getting off immediately because I number one I wanted a private tour. I'm not trying to be on there with other idiots that got duped into this Number two, they were they were the they were the Australian disney couples. They were sexless people. Yeah, no, they were sexless and It was worse than that. It was that they really wanted to learn something but they

They didn't but they did I hate people that want to go on a vacation. It's like read a goddamn book What are you going to learn in eight minutes? What are you going to learn on a half a day tour about what really happened here? Like can you can you stop? I hate and like when this guy this moron mick God, I hope he hears it when he talked The people in the bus were like they had stern faces And they were like nodding and the it was very grave and they were like we're taking it seriously

We understand how hard it's been And he started and I'm like, you know what man? This is just not my vibe. So we had to peace out I'm like, sorry, sir. We're supposed to be at the great barrier reef Smoking cigarettes. It was a very solemn affair, but he was also doing his schticky tour bus driver joe It's the worst. I was a tour guide Tour guides are damned people. They're damned. They're forced to be A visitor in the place that they live constantly. It's a constant groundhog day Movie where every day is the same the people come and go

Tour guides are forced to be spectators. They are damned. I was one of them But I was doing comedy at night. So I know what it's like and that hacky stick They all do was so It's so Sad when a tour guide throws out a joke that bombs You wish for his own sake

That he just blows his brains out in front of you. You want to see brain matter splatter on the windshield of that van After one of those hacky jokes doesn't land Because it's so sad When they do that and then he tries to sound morally superior Yeah, that's the issue is when he's like we was a genocide and we stole the babies and fed them to dingo's Digery don't ask me about it. And now we have a community center It's a community center I mean ben what are your so I just I mean, what are your

I just said I mean, what do you Think about these things. So remember he he was and that's true But the other thing I think If you really think about it. No, I'm kidding. Go on ben. So the perpetually Ungrateful ben every world traveler just doesn't care go on. So the remember how he Told us the k's are pronounced with a g So I looked this up. They're the gugu yilanji. This was the group that was here that was supposedly You know taken over, right? I did some digging

Turns out the gugu yilanji Hunt to chinese for cannibalistic feasting. So they would eat people So I wonder if he goes into that on the tour at all. Well, I wish I knew that This is why you gotta google before we go on the tour because I would have said hey mick I heard that they used to hunt chinese people and eat them And I'm not even I don't even know if I'm against that I'm just saying if we're gonna have a fact finding mission at eight o'clock in the morning That's what shahab's gonna do with bobby

There's now where did you find this out ben? Are you on one of those sites you go on? No, I went to wikipedia and then went to a separate article that was cited and they said that they Uh hunted the chinese and ate them. Uh, yeah, so modern historians now consider that These early reports like the tales of the cuckoo yilanji hunting chinese for cannibalistic feasting whatever partial truth They contain functions to a sewage Any guilt europeans or assuage any guilt? Sorry Not a sewage any guilt european settlers may have felt for their key role in the dissemination of northern queensland aboriginal communities So that is a disputed thing. I don't want to disparage the uh, the good people here, but I mean in this instance

What does chinese person mean? Oh good question this tribe this this tribe the lululemon What did they I think a lot of these the lululemon Maybe ate a few chinese people, but Did they deserve to have their land taken so that they could build this shit hotel And get my business and serve me shit food And charge me an arm and a leg so that they can run around like a stasi

Wanting to know where I am at every moment of the fucking day I'd rather be here eating chinese babies With the lululemon I mean they even have to qualify it. They're they're dismissing it, but they also have to qualify it saying whatever partial truth That contains here's the deal folks white people are horrifically violent But if you think that natives were all it was all like sunshine and happy songs It's not the case. There were tribes. It was warfare. There was violence. There was pillaging. There was conquering. There was cannibalism I mean violence is not

The providence only of white european settlers. It was really the the currency of the world I mean people that have an ignorance of history or that only stuttle the study The colonial era and they don't look back at ancient history. They don't know anything about antiquity. They don't know anything about You know, they they get a very skewed view of the world and they tend to demonize western civilization That has a litany of problems and like every civilization was built on oppression plundering Killing murdering, but before that listen There's there's very few countries that were established by people showing up and going. Hey, do you mind if we get in on this? That's not the way the world worked

It was a world of conquerors and killers of diseases. You know People have to chill the fuck out. Yeah blood meridian Violence is man That's right Man are violent people and so are women And and you know, we just got to move on from this It doesn't matter that they hate chinese children or adults It doesn't bother me the lululemon can do whatever they want

Have these are spokesmen for the lululemon For the kooji His book his book is in our bathroom right now Oh that guy I saw that dropped it behind the window and I can't get it out. Oh, yeah I tried to get at it too when I was taking a shoot one of the the elders of I think this tribe There's a book of his photography in our room me and well I'm deciding with them because they haven't been fucking me for three days serving me shit And getting in my business. So I don't care what they did. I would have rather to hang out with them

There is an indigenous swimming hole here called the blue hole that you're not allowed to go in. Yeah, and um And because it's for the the local women to bathe and some people did and one guy said he was cursed and he's now sterile Let's move on uh here because I just I don't want to lose myself This isn't you know a show that's gonna cut this isn't I'm not a travel blogger I will be back home next week I just want to let everybody know That the silky oaks lodge in Queensland Australia is running a human trafficking ring

Do with that information What you will Roe v. Wade that is in the news roe v. Wade The supreme court potentially overturning roe v. Wade The federal protections for abortion Going to be eliminated states like texas Maybe louisiana places like that criminalizing abortion potentially making it a felony

Perhaps are we headed backwards towards the dark ages? Yes, however You know, here's the point that needs to be made There's got to be a period of time between conception And birth where an abortion is legal After a certain amount of time It is cruel and human and it is murder You can't have an abortion at eight months. Well, right

May I yes, okay because now you're going to say If the mother's life is in danger. No, I'm not You're going to say Okay, well, what are you gonna say I'm going to say that usually when it's a very late term abortion Yes, one of two things right either the fact that they do a Scan on the baby and it's not developing the way they thought it would and it's not going to be born with a heart Or it doesn't have a head It's some very gross mutation that will not allow the child to live outside the utero

Or it when it gets into a six or seventh month, it's because there's certain places in the country where you need to be You have to wait two weeks to get it all done And then you work at arby's and you have to get to abalone texas from houston I understand but that to me doesn't matter if you have a seven month baby inside of you I don't care how long it's taking you to find out that you're pregnant I don't care that you had to go from arby's to abalone in which I imagine they have an arby's in abalone. They do You had problem there, right? I didn't try to find it. You cannot eliminate A a fully I mean seven months kids are born at seven months and live happy lives. That's a fully formed fetus

Are you saying that you should be able to eliminate a seven month pregnancy? I'm just saying that a lot of these instances are just a matter of I get the heart thing I get a baby can't live outside. Right. I get that but what I don't get is like, hey, man, I didn't have the time Yeah, I don't get that. I think 99 of the cases it's born with a foot for a brain So they have to kill it before it comes out because it won't live outside But there are these instances of women not being able people with feet for brains that live in mansions But I get what you're saying. Yeah, I'm not trying to be insensitive to the plight of a mother

That is struggling with the fact that the child will not be able to survive But I don't think you could just say it's seven months. Hey, they have Down syndrome. Let's let's flush it And I'm not defending it either way. I'm just saying these are the reasons people Have uh have late term abortions I understand because I'm already going to get my whole ripped open From even weighing in on it. So no, no, no, no. Well, you got to weigh in This is the way it's the way of the world. I'm saying that In europe and in the uk in most places

I don't know how long it is But it's usually Ben, can you look up The uk abortions the vast majority of them are before 20 weeks. I don't know what or 25 weeks. I'm unsure This is not an area that I've done a hell of a lot of research I'm not an expert in third trimester and I believe that abortion should be legal in america And federally legal like I don't believe because I think that it just hurts poor women That have to make all these arrangements to go to another state and have an abortion. This is

I don't believe in returning here to the dark ages. That's not It's not good. Well, the great state of colorado made it a constitutional protected, right? Well, I think new york did too. I mean, there's some You know, but I I also believe that after a certain point It's tough to make the moral argument So like nine out of ten abortions are done before 12 weeks in most high income high income countries So I'm assuming that falls within the uk would would be that so nine out of ten done before 12 weeks

Which would be what's three months? Keep it under three ladies Please That's all What I mean sam you give me a face I'm trying to come up with a compromise here. The world's not going to be fucking Denver So we need to have a compromise like we can't just

I have to be the the voice of reason. I believe in legal federal abortion rights But I also believe that you can't like six months into a pregnancy Go hey, this ain't for me. I don't believe that It's that's a baby At three months. It's not a baby. So hey ladies, okay, so hey ladies when you're out there for ladies night Just keep it under three months, please I found many of those states are going to outlaw the pill too So I mean we're really going to the dark age

But this is the pushback against gender's not real and all this other stuff that's happening Where you have this encroaching madness That you're seeing all over the place People are going to you know, they're going to deeply entrench themselves in like, you know Like theocratic Christianity where they go well now we have to live in a theocracy which is not the answer either because there's a lot of people That don't subscribe to christianity, but i'm just saying morally in a humanist way Six months. You can't start

You know we can't do this Well, they're still going to have the abortions. They're just going to pass away from getting shoddy work done Well, if you're going to have an abortion at seven months when you have a fully formed baby inside those are fun women though Those are the ones who get knocked up. They they're kind of well, you know, this isn't for me. I want to go to cabo Yeah, we're going to lose the fun women. See that's when I have a little bit of an issue with it because I I think there should be a happy medium in this country between ending all abortion And allowing people at eight months who go, you know, maybe this isn't for me

To flush the baby. There's got to be a happy medium And it's Ladies, let's keep it under three Keep it under three months. Well, you don't know you're pregnant until well pay attention Pay attention to your body If I was pregnant, I'd know I have a medical paper here from England and Wales Hey, good job over there. So here are the major reasons for having abortion after 13 plus weeks of gestation

Can I can I complimented you? And you don't even you don't even say thank you. What was condescending? Why was it condescending the tone was condescending? How was it condescending because you were implying that I typically don't do my job That's a very negative way to look at it. I said good job You then believed that I was being condescending Do you have guilt that you don't do a good job? Are you guilty? Uh, I mean I have feelings of like worthlessness and I guess I feel guilty Yeah, but those are your feelings not my feelings. You asked me how I feel though

Right, but I don't make you feel that way. Do I why are you making about you? You asked me how I feel Yes, but my point is that when I say good job I'm trying to compliment you And you are wrapping up your own self concept in it Or all I do is try to do the right thing by not only you but every man woman non-binary person child elderly ancient elder indigenous person and guardian of the land that I've always just tried to

Do the right thing. So I just say good job. That's all I'm saying Is it condescending does it sound condescending when I say good job Does that really sound condescending? Yeah, I think you have internal guilt That you are racked with because perhaps you feel that You are not worthy of the compliments that I give But that is not my fault

I want you to look in the mirror and give yourself a big kiss Okay Okay, now please tell us about that medical paper from wales and england Good So here are the reasons that you're looking for in terms of why people have abortions after 13 weeks of gestation Yes, they're hoes. So at the top of the list is the top 10 lists like letterman. Can you do it like letterman number 10? So 41 percent of people said

I was not sure about having the abortion and it took me a while to make my mind up and ask for one not good not Not a credible answer move on. It's not a second is uh, here's 38 percent of people Say, I didn't realize I was pregnant earlier because my periods are irregular. That is more understandable That is a lot more understandable than hey It's six months in and I you know, I'm still on the fence Unappropriate what about 13 weeks though fine. Is that under three? Uh, that's one more than that would be one. That'd be three weeks in three months in a week. Yeah, fine Just keep it around three

The number is three So then we have uh, let's see here Oh, this was out of this isn't percentages. This is out of a 858 uh people So that was 41 people than 38 now 36 and i'm going down in the majorities here 36 people said I thought the pregnancy was much less advanced than it was when I asked for the abortion Hmm Um, wait, what it says I thought the pregnancy was much less advanced than it was when I asked for the They thought they were at one month and they were really at four. I believe so. Yeah, okay. All right

32 people say, uh, I wasn't sure what I would do if I were pregnant That's coming in at number four number five I didn't realize I was pregnant earlier because I was using contraception So they assume because they're using uh, the ring thing or they're on pill. You're not getting your period fair Uh, 30 people say I suspect that I was pregnant, but I didn't do anything about it until weeks had gone by Okay 26 people said I was worried how my parents would react 24 people said I had to wait more than five days before I could get a consultation appointment to get the go-ahead for the abortion

And the number one reason that people have late term abortions is I found out brennan schaub was the father Yeah I'm pulsing from the band circle Man Yeah, so I got more reasons here. You want to hear them? I got like five more. Okay Uh

So one person says uh, so 23 people say my relationship with my partner broke down slash changed So not good high stress. You're pregnant and you realize you don't want to go through with it. Yeah, these are all not Okay, then 22 people say I was worried about what was involved in having an abortion So it took me a while to ask for one. So they were scared. Okay, but still get it under ladies under three Then we have Someone's 20 people say I uh, I had to wait more than seven days between the consultation. How about I give you four Four months

At four months, that's still kind of a baby. You're shark tanking this thing. Yeah, I'm gonna give you four months I'm gonna give you four months. We got to make a deal. Nobody wants to make deals in this country anymore. Let me make a deal ladies Four months. I'll give you four four months But you love freedom You love your freedom above all else. I don't think you could take an eight month old baby

And have an abortion that is a very difficult thing for me morally To get behind That is a hard thing for me Unless there is a tremendous medical reason If you have a fully formed baby Inside of you. It is very tough for me to co-sign that to be honest I just I mean the baby's born in a month

We should make adoption easier in this country. It is criminal how horrible The process is to adopt and here is the other problem Adopted kids are always thieves Yeah, and untrustworthy because they can never get over and Yanis Papas and we talked about this They can never get over the feeling of abandonment From their mother. It's baked into their bones Russian orphanage syndrome the way the nanny state is baked into the bones of the Aussies and So you are going to have a crim

for a child Got to have you're gonna have a goddamn crim, but I still think it should be made easier It's difficult, but where do you stand on this man? The people want to know the people want to know where you're at how you feel way in Please well, it seems to be like a lot of things, right? Like prostitution drugs abortion where if you outlaw certain things you create a whole other litany of problems And it doesn't necessarily stop the the action thereof So, uh, I mean to have an opinion on it seems somewhat pointless, right?

Because people are gonna have them out no matter what well, I have to earn a living So I think I might have to have one I don't think it's pointless. How do you pay your rent? It's completely pointless doesn't don't you have a new car? anyway I'll tell you this I'm running on the platform ladies. Let's keep it around three please. Can we keep it around three? You bunch of birds

I understand there's reasons for later It's a case by case. I'm just saying in eight months You don't feel a little bit about that same eight months babies fully formed I think this should be the last option But I also and with ben and the issue that They're gonna do it anyway, you know, but everybody's gonna do everything anyway people are gonna do fentanyl anyway. Yeah. Yeah, yeah Right. We outlawed fentanyl Well, I mean if you did legal, I mean, we're getting in some very murky water

If you legalize fentanyl though, then people will, you know, do it supervised and it'll be easier I just mean there's so many. Well, are they gonna do a super? I love that's my favorite Argument for drug legalization where it's like you legalize fentanyl. They'll just do it to supervise. It's like, will they? Is that the way they're gonna do it? Well, all right. It's wednesday. Today's fentanyl day I'm going for a supervised fentanyl visit Yeah, it's all supervised and legal. I'll just go in I'll do fentanyl I'll walk out and everything's okay Um, I understand what you're saying, but I do believe I mean, perhaps I am further to the right

Then both of you gentlemen Because I do believe in a little bit of morality I do and it's a lot of gays and gay men specifically that are forced to kind of kind of and you see a lot of these uh, uh gay men coming out and Saying these things that we need to have a little bit of a moral country And it's interesting to see because a lot of Of the more, you know, pansexual leg out there kind of, you know, people are not but I think a lot of gay men are starting to

This should go listen ladies. Let's just keep can we keep it? Can we just calm it down? Let's just not flush it at eight and a half months Let's not do that It should be a thing that You know, we don't do we need like there's some people in this country. I mean people have one man shows about their abortions. It's like, okay But do we need that? Do we need abortion cafes?

Is that next? Should you be able to get an abortion in starbucks? With a caramel macchiato? I don't know I just think it's weird that gay men are starting to become the moral guardians of america now. It's very weird. Yeah But it's you know I mean lesbians are hopeless they're the vast majority of them are more suited towards agriculture

Which is fine, but you know gay men right now are kind of you know kind of You know, some of us not all of us by no means all of us probably not even a majority But there is a vocal minority of gay men who are saying let's kind of keep women in their box Which I think is kind of important And it should be a box with velvet Where they're comfortable

But like I think gay men are the ones who have because we're not like the power of the pussy doesn't really affect us So we're able to say ladies. How about we calm it down? And that's important because a lot of straight men that just want to get pussy. You're like, yeah, whatever flush the babe Do whatever you want Ban everything We should only be able to use water for a minute and a half in the shower and gay men are going hey Get your pussy away from me baby killer

And don't we need a population of people But let's bring it back to what really mattered Bobby Lee alive Annie Letterman Brendan Schaum Roe v. Wade That's how we started the show Many moral questions. No easy answers

No easy answers Many moral questions quandaries deep complex Important they matter. I don't know I don't know But I do know And that's the the horror that I live with every day. It's the struggle of being me Not knowing but also knowing well You know

Did you it have you have you enjoyed your time in Australia? We're leaving soon We have one more day here and then we'll be back in our studio. Yeah, it's it's a wonderful Place. I mean we saw the whole thing. We really did Six cities not five but six. That's right. Uh By the way, uh, what was it called point tribulation the the cape cape tribulation cape trip Three people just died on the road there in one day on the way up. Well, they're drunk So it's actually we're scared of the crocs and the Doing any research people like flip over those roads all the time and kill themselves

There's no police remember and the people aren't registered to drive. Yeah Maybe you do need laws Maybe you do need laws A brilliant end A brilliant end It's dangerous here in the rainforest It's dangerous in the comedy store parking lot Danger lurks behind every door

Ah But my consistent position is That I wish the best for everyone involved And I just don't want to see them Hear from them hear about them at all ever for any reason And then

We're good As long as that promise can be made to me So that is my position. It's my position on everything Get away from me And as far as the silky oaks lodge in uh Mossman with a hell are we? Yeah, uh, yeah, I guess I guess so. Yeah, you're trying to be a grown-up resort But you don't know how

Your nature to crims That's okay But you need to give people freedom. You need to fire your chef You need to fire most of your staff besides lauren some of the guys are hot um But Nobody really wants to spend this kind of money to take a shuttle bus Into a venomous hellscape

To be here served horseshit by human sweetish human trafficking victims Please get it the fuck together Because now I have to go to the four seasons in Maui and I hope rogan hasn't booked my fucking sweet Well anyway For fans of comedy and MMA those two concentric circles For MMA fans and comedy fans

This has been the tim dillon show with sam talent The perpetually ungrateful ben avari live From queensland australia tomorrow We eat at mr. Wong's in sydney And then the next day We're out of here and we're coming home where the venom lives in the people

Good night