The Tim Dillon Show - 308 - Tim's Big Audition with Chris Distefano

Episode Date: July 24, 2022

Tim auditions for the role on Netflix he always wanted, Buzz Lightyear going woke, Fire Island, the fate of Ghislaine, and Ben and his wife going to Europe. Follow the very funny Chris Distefano and support him: https://chrisdcomedy.com/ Bonus episodes every week: ▶▶ https://www.patreon.com/thetimdillonshow ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS: HELIX BED ▶▶ https://www.helixsleep.com/timd for 200 dollars off Mattress orders and two free pillows WATCHES ▶▶ for 20% off go to https://www.vincerocollective.com/timdillon 🔒 VPN: Get three months free ▶▶ https://www.expressvpn.com/timdillon 📦 BOX OF AWESOME ▶▶ http://boxofawesome.com use code TIMDILLON at checkout for 20% off CRYPTO ▶▶ http://exodus.com/tim to start free. Over 4 million people trust Exodus to manage their crypto. Join the movement away from traditional finance by downloading Exodus. ONNIT ▶▶ Go to http://onnit.com/tim for 10% off EVERY MAN JACK ▶▶ https://www.everymanjack.com to get 20% off your first purchase use code DILLON 🎧 HEADPHONES: For 15% off! ▶▶ https://www.buyraycon.com/tim 👨‍🦱 HAIR LOSS: ▶▶ https://www.keeps.com/TimDillon 💆THERAPY ▶▶ https://www.betterhelp.com/TIMD BIRD DOGS! ▶▶ https://www.birddogs.com/ use code TIMDILLON ATHLETIC GREENS ▶▶ https://athleticgreens.com/timdillon MASTERWORKS ▶▶ https://masterworks.art/tim SIMPLI SAFE ▶▶ https://simplisafe.com/timdillon to save 20% MUD\WTR ▶▶ https://mudwtr.com/tim use code TIM for $5 off STARTMAIL: start securing email privacy! ▶▶ https://startmail.com/timd for 50% off your first year! Watch SteveWillDoIt's Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC55JghDUfUatuLc1wp4uGoA ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃: 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timjdillon/ 🐦 Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/TimJDillon 🌍 Tim Dillon Live Dates!: http://timdilloncomedy.com/#shows 📹 Subscribe to the channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4woSp8ITBoYDmjkukhEhxg Listen on Spotify! https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1woKiAazAKPWPkHjds  ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ ▶▶ Ed McMahon [e-mail] https://www.instagram.com/benaveryisgood/ https://twitter.com/benaveryisgood ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ #TheTimDillonShow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon show. We are here with a comedian Chris Stefano from New York City, thank you for coming. We appreciate you've never done the show. Have you? I've never I'll tell you what I've never done it in this studio. Are you nervous about this LA? No, just being on the show. You know what? Here's the deal. We're the new Rogan You won't I don't want it. I don't want to start a fight with him, right? But I literally will. Yeah, we are the new Joe Rogan experience. What happens in that chair Can destroy your life or it can save it? Yeah, the only difference between this studio and Joe Rogan's studio is Joe Rogan has beef jerky made out of Native Americans in the waiting room

Yes, he does. He does in like barrels of whiskey. Yeah, and and arm security and Navy Seals That are arm security, but I'll tell you right now. Ben's got great hand-eye. He does If you start a problem, he's a real lanky guy, but he's got good hand-eye and he can get down on the ground with you He's a grappler Ben is been a grappler. I don't know probably not He's one of those guys I wouldn't I wouldn't fuck with Ben at all Well, cuz he has that wasp cold Texas thing so you can just walk away He doesn't know what emotions are so he doesn't feel which is what's so good And that's why he does good at the job if you did if you did Ben's face on that face app face swap thing

He would seamlessly fit into most mass shooters profiles a hundred percent facially a hundred percent. Yeah, yeah He's got that face the only reason Ben doesn't shoot up a school is because he doesn't like traffic All right, like he come you know what I mean like he'll be like oh my god. It's fucking not a clock There's still traffic, but I'll tell you what with all the over saturation That's going on in comedy and entertainment in general the last stand of going viral might be a mass shooting there Well, what a what a great way to get banned from every platform at once See, this is guerrilla warfare now. They come on the podcasters come on and try to get you banned immediately That's what we should all do

We should all just go on each other shows and try to get banned I try to get their show band like I should just go on taste buds with Sal and de Rosa Yeah, great show and what I should do is when they're arguing about peanut butter and jelly I should go do you think black people have different skull shapes than white people? They're taking off YouTube. That's the only way we can win now is get each other kicked off Honestly, it's I would like to go back. I was telling Ben before he got here like go back to like opi and Anthony vibes Yes, you know what I mean do things like that. Yes, because I think that's what real comedy is Yeah, we got to try to get got to try to get each other banned

Yeah, how to try to get everybody banned and you know, we'll see what happens for me. I feel I Feel safe that no matter what happens to me because I'm surrounded by transgender and Puerto Ricans You were very smart to build to put yourself on an island Full of brown people. Yep who have mutilated their bodies. Yep. That is such a benefit for you What's been beautiful about my life the last month is my father. Yes, who we call Tampa Tony is up from Florida Yes, staying with me for a month and it was the first time he's ever been around tt. Jerry who's transgender Puerto Rican person nanny Nanny. Yeah, she's my show Trent tt. Jerry is my kid's mom's godfather Yes, did prison time for 20 years transitioned in prison and is now my youngest daughter's godmother, right same person

Right, so it's very fun to see to tell my Irish Catholic conservative bringing her up right now here She has tt. Jerry. Yeah, she looks like John Cicada with AIDS. Yeah So she does have eggs and there's nothing wrong with that. Hey, whatever it is. It is right. Yeah, and she it's in remission Yeah, sometimes it flares up. I'll tell you what she doesn't have COVID Um, so so what's been interesting what's been nice is watching my father because you watch the news long enough Yeah, brainwash a little bit to think that you know a Transgender Latino inmate wouldn't get along with a conservative fat guy from the Bronx, right who now lives in Florida And they you could you you couldn't be more wrong about the reality of the situation

Which is that they are best friends. Yes, they live the other night. They're watching Fox news, right? I got my father's Fox news on all day every day. It's what it is It's what you expect 75-year-old guy from Florida. So Tucker Carlson is on at night and tt. Jerry's watching doesn't know anything about, you know, the news doesn't watch it at all She you know, she watches Wendy Williams and stuff to get the news and she Tucker Carlson is on and out of nowhere TT says To my father she goes, you know for a white guy Tucker Carlson looks like he probably got a big dick and My father was like, you know, I never thought about that Jerry and they had like this moment. Yeah, where it was like they then started

Talking about, you know, both watching Fox news because TT was you know, thought things Tucker Carlson is legitimately hot And hasn't stopped talking about how she wants to suck Tucker Carlson stick and my father loves his politics But they came together and they dropped my kids off at school at summer camp every day So I think the people at the summer camp are like, what is this old man? Yeah diabetes and fake knees Walking out this transgender Puerto Rican woman saying she wants to suck Tucker Carlson's cock for dropping off these two little girls Right, and it's what my life is and it is the new sitcom. Yeah, it is a new sitcom that no one will make sadly Yes, well, no one's gonna make well, we don't know if I put on your YouTube. Yes, that's what you should I would it's a new modern family. It's a new

It's it's it's kind of like the new Everybody loves Raymond, but with a transgender you are getting to something that I think is legitimate and that is that People when you go online, everybody hates everybody right when you actually put people in a room together. Oh my god It's actually not the case. No, yeah, no, no, I don't well you we see that comedy shows No, but everybody's fine. Everything is fine. Everybody's fine. I know there's issues. There's issues There's issues, but that's why I moved to Staten Island. Yeah, now I'm on an island of yeah You want to complain about an issue? Yeah, it better be the right issue That's right because if you're complaining about another type of issue, you're gonna be asked to leave that island

You know what I think what I've learned is that when people are Really concerned with politics a lot of the time it masks the fact that they themselves are Bored sure it's bored. Yeah, it's real bored. Um and to which I present to them many many options Including drugs. Yeah, it is too. I was a drug addict for many many years. It is a better life It is more interesting. You are more focused. I mean taking a nice drive to go get oxycontin in Suffolk County, Long Island, you know To me is a better way to use your time than arguing over Facebook about health care Yeah, and not enough people are out there not enough people are talking about actually saving white people

We have to save the whites. I was just in Providence, Rhode Island And they're and they're all dying all these white people are dying of heroin overdoses They have blue lips and they're sunken in eyes and they follow you around in a drug store and it's uncomfortable I was in a Dunkin Donuts in Providence. I was just just there last weekend. I was in a Dunkin Donuts in Providence I mean full meth crack heads. I bought a donut You know a powdered sugar donut. I I blew I went in the park line because just in case there was a little fentanyl resin I was like, I'm not sure. No, it's it's so bad right now Yeah, and Louis C K can't put everyone in a movie. You know and also not everyone can get Louis on the podcast

Right. So that's the whole well. He's doing all of them. That's what I'm saying. He's doing everybody He's gonna do ours in august. It's amazing. But we're not talking about the movie We got a big show here. Yeah, we can't just spend an hour talking about the movie. We can't spend an hour talking about it We'll tell people to go see it, but there's other questions. We must ask ask now Um, I wanted to do this because it's very interesting. They just you know, you you do some acting not a ton Not a ton. I am doing a Volkswagen commercial tomorrow because Germany's fighting back Yes, and now they've hired you which I love. Yeah, I love that Volkswagen goes. You know what? Yeah, forget about diversity inclusion. Let's go with the most german-looking head. We can find what is the commercial

Do you know yet? It's literally just going out there. I'm trying to now sell the Volkswagen atlas Which is a truck which is a beautiful truck, which actually is good for me with the family I have what you should have negotiated you they should have given you a Volkswagen atlas Well, so we're but that see the thing times are tough right now That's the thing is I literally was like I had why did I have taken uber? To the you know from the airport Why wasn't I picked up in a Volkswagen or give me a Volkswagen? Right, like we genuinely don't have the money to give you a Volkswagen. We just pay to do the commercial

Yeah, that's it. So you go in there and do you know what the script is yet? Do you know what you have to do? It's kind of something it's about like the rules of the road kind of thing like Volkswagen's rules of the road I like a company. Yeah Implicated in one of the greatest yet. Is did did Volkswagen get involved? I know Mercedes was but was Volkswagen involved I believe Volkswagen was but I liked that they're still focused on order Yeah, there's something nice about a car. So the rules of the road The rules of the road Well, so what happened was is too hot the way I even got this gig is the head of come out weeks after you're paid by

Yeah, yes, we're good. Well, the only reason I'm talking so fluidly is because the money's already in the bank account And you won't get it back. That's great. So no matter what I'll move to another country So so I I'll move to Germany where I'm free. So So I'll They said that the head of Volkswagen Or whoever the digital ad people whatever we're looking for a German comic and they couldn't find a German comic So my name got pitched like his last names to Stefano But then the head of Volkswagen took a look at me. It was like there's no way that guy's not fully German

Right and so that so so I like a company too that although they're in about inclusiveness They include everybody and all this and that and you know, they just are like, who's the people are going to buy the car Let's get a guy who looks like the people who buy the car I've never kind of like that and I'm I'm this is anecdotal. I've never seen A non-white person in a Volkswagen. No ever in my life. No, which is fine. It's fine But it's fine. It's called the demographic. It's fine. I'm not going to be the spokesperson for Lincoln navigators. Right, you know, right It's a great point. So and that's fine. Right. That's fine. I don't know why there's such an issue about these things like for example Sometimes you just have to be strong with people. So last week. I wasn't home

They had to fix the air conditioner Units in my in my house and one of the guys went up there Guatemalan guy went up there and I fell through my attic ceiling right fell on the floor Whole thing blah blah blah blah blah So then all of a sudden the foreman calls me he goes, yeah, my guys his neck hurts now All of a sudden his neck is hurting trying to look for some cash So tt jerry being a career criminal goes up to that room and says, oh, you know your neck hurts and the guy says cc And he goes, uh, he goes, well, do you have your papers? I just want to know if you have your papers

And then and then so and then the guy was like no paper no paper and he goes Yeah, he goes to then go back up on the ladder right and fix the ceiling. Fuck. Yeah. So you would think that Tt and I I wasn't there. This was all told second hand to me Of course But but I but I believe that it happened that way and that ceiling was fixed and everything was fine And then there was a crew of people that came into the house after that to do some patch up Some some of the other air conditioner stuff and then a ring went missing somebody stole a ring Oh, so they were gonna come, you know, we had it was a big thing and tt jerry just flat out said

If I don't get if I don't get that ring back because it was all the same proof I don't get that ring back I'm gonna go to immigration and I'm gonna make sure this guy gets deported and then guess what? About an hour later the ring was left on a paint can outside the house So sometimes this is the pilot of the sitcom. Yeah, I want you to go in you're in LA right now I want you to go in and I want you to pitch this hulu netflix amazon prime Uh hbo max I want you to go and so this is the resolution of the pilot My Puerto Rican transgender somewhat republican

Uncle ant yeah goes and threatens to inform on the paperless undocumented worker and gets the ring back End of episode one. Yeah, who's in yeah. Well, how about and it was it was it was fireworks But this is the way real life is this start making real life start making fire island You gotta make which by the way, it's a move and god bless everyone But the movie is about gay guys who go to an island to fuck for a week and somehow have a bad time Yeah, somehow it's bad No, they're going to an island to take molly and fuck this new thing on hulu But somehow they're everyone's so racist. They can't have fun

The molly and the hormones don't overcome the racism Nobody in the world Nobody in the world right has more fun than gay men and black women. Yes. These are the two groups Far and away Yes, they've been through shit and they realize that you have to have fun Right. So to me, it's just funny the idea of making a film about going to a fuck Right, which is what fire island is right and that why are you looking up firefest? He's so dumb He's so dumb. He's looking up firefest right now. We're talking about a movie called fire. Yeah, he's looking up fire

Yeah, do you realize what I deal with do you understand right how how hard it is for me And how impressive it is. I've gotten anywhere with this with this dead weight. I carry just dead weight, right? But my father watched it. He thought it was not so rich Asians. Yeah That's what he thought it was He was like, yeah, he was telling it. He was telling my stuff. He didn't see this with your friends. They're not that rich at all Yeah, because I thought they were crazy rich. Yeah, he goes there on a ferry Yeah, uh, but it's it's just funny to me. There's no more and nobody wants to have fun anymore No, no films are about having fun. Everything's about educating people teaching them lessons. It's like

You're going to an island where everyone's gonna fuck and they go, whoa, maybe some of them are racist Who cares? Yeah, suck each other off. Yeah, what? No, you're right. That's bothering you Yeah, it's literally my child who's a seven-year-old. We watched look who's talking ever seen the movie look who's talking In the first five minutes of look who's talking in 1989 with john chevolta. Curse the alley first five minutes somebody blows up they blow a load into the into the Uterus and then they got the embryo falling down and a sperm just gets in the egg and right away It's come it's jizz and then the first first five minutes They have babies talk, you know, the little babies in the, you know, right who are born

And and uh, they have an indian baby and they just give the baby who's you know talking in a voice over an indian exit Yeah, I went to be the incarnated my daughter's on the floor laughing her ass off hilarious I'm like, but meanwhile, then they went woke on one of the last Pixar's and my kid fucking hated it. Right. It's like just say what's funny. Please right the kids don't give a shit Right, you know just be goofy and silly just be goofy and silly. We know it's not that big of a deal The last Pixar was woke. Is this where buzz light year? Yes. That's the one. Yes. We're but but no no no Is it where he took he gets his salad tossed? No, that one there's one where buzz light year gets his salad tossed

Buzz light year gets his ass in buzz light year looks like me get a buzz light year from the new picking He literally looks like me to a point where my conspiracy is that they Literally, I mean look how much I mean, that's insane. There it is. That's insane There's buzz light year with a chin full of color. I think he's is he gay in the movie buzz light year is gay He's gay. He's gay in the movie. We haven't seen that one yet There was another one though where they had some woke messaging which it's whatever I um, I don't know. But yeah, I mean, listen, I don't care. Whatever. I don't I don't give a shit about my kids seeing Right gay trend whatever you want to do. Just make it funny. Make it fun. I don't care

I don't care because because the bottom line is the way I view it is my children are going to get the education in school And then they're going to get the education at home. Right. So whatever you put out there It's my job as the kids parents. My whole thing has always been leave kids alone Let them discover who they are and what they Value in life. I think kids are over-parented. Oh my god. Yeah, and I think that You know teachers in school their job is to give kids the fundamental basics reading writing a rhythm. That's right I don't want you to talk to them about anything else. I don't I don't think they should Because the reality of the situation is

Teachers, you know, and I mean again, I'm gonna I'm gonna get some flak for this But you know it hasn't been going well with just the reading and the math and the science not in this country Right. So let's focus on that and not so much trying to build these Kids in every area of their lives. I'm very big. Listen. I was left alone a lot And sure you could say oh you're doing coke at 13 and blah blah blah sure You're having fun, but I have a Bentley now. So here's the point The reality is and people go. Oh, that doesn't matter. Yes, it does. It absolutely does um

And it's 2018. It's certified pre-owned There are problems And I you know what I mean and I I understand that because but the reality is I was left alone And to figure it out. Nobody came to me and said you can be a girl You know what I mean? Nobody came to me and said you can suck a dick You find out that you can suck a dick through trial and error Yeah, you find out and it's not something that has to be like nobody has to sit you down and explain to you Who you want to fuck right? You know, yeah, that's what it is. You'll figure it out

I know I think I think we get so worried about the youth in this country And like you said, we'll figure it out the thing I think like the the school my daughter goes to now Which I like again being on Staten Island, right? They don't lean into any of this stuff My daughter in a couple of months ago, you know, school they have field trips to the to capital riot. Oh hundred percent Yeah, she came home with a coloring worksheet a couple of months ago with you know They're teaching them about men and women and life and careers She came home with a coloring worksheet about it was coloring

You know different people and what their jobs was the woman had a broom and was cleaning a stovetop And the man had a hammer to a wall It's what it was that's what yep Yeah, that's what it is. You know, it's confusing for my daughter because she's like t t jerry. What which one is that? I'm like, that's second grade. We'll talk to you about that prison behind the bars. Yes. That's yeah That's the one behind the dumpster sucking cock for crack. There's a new show on Netflix called heart stopper. They have an open call Uh, and this is a very big show. It's a lgbtq ia2 whatever show and it's I'm sure it's lovely

I have no Beef with the show that of course one of the people in it. They ask him if he's gay He's not gay and he has to go Well, I don't want to tell you because now everyone will go nuts if they find out he's straight the kid in the orange Kid Connors probably most likely straight. Maybe maybe there's a little but I mean the reality is but they have an open call There's an open call for a cast member who is a 16 year old and again one thing that I think about people like me and you is that we haven't been given a shot to act in the way that

Many people in our industry have and so it says heart stopper announces casting call for exciting new role For season two with lgbtq plus actors encouraged to apply. Sorry chris. That means me. Yeah, and here's the role Okay, the role right here because I think it is actually perfect for me Is going to be can you go up ben? Thanks, ben. It's please go up more I mean, here's what's amazing. Here's what these podcast producers don't realize they've all won a lottery Right, let's be very honest. They've all really won a lottery. Yep. They've won a lottery I don't care what they tell the other people in their lives. Yeah, they've all gone to the casino

And just they've won a lottery Yeah, and and and that's a real and that's why everyone online hates them Right like well the comments like ben should die because everybody else wants to be in the lot They want to win the lot. They want to win. They're like I can do that. They go. I can I scroll up I can scroll but I don't know if they could see the thing is maybe some of them couldn't some of them probably could Some of them couldn't and also some of them some of them the thing what I think was the x-factor with ben Is you have trust because some of them because he's not that good at this But he's decent. I trust him a lot because here's what'll happen

But he's he's not quick like jimmy vernan's very quick right, but he's not really quick But some of these other but he doesn't look like homeless pimp either which is good Which is the homeless pimp you have to leave outside of a hotel lobby. Yeah, well not anymore He's getting better losing weight. He looks good now. Oh, he's good. Well, let's let's relax with good, but it's on the way It's in a positive the direction positive way He um, but yes, he ben is trustworthy because some of these other podcast producers they don't lock that back door Yes, they don't lock that back under this shore. Yep. That's what it is for sure Heartstopper season two open call now. I love this because I feel like I can actually breathe life into this role

Casting for the role of sahar zahid. There you go. Sahar zahid Actor must be a minimum age of 16 playing age 16 Ben I don't want to put you under too much pressure Could you find like sides or within that's the industry terminology for some type of scripture? Oh, what because I'm literally now on the show We are going to film an audition for zahar Hadid

A 16 year old in the netflix show heartstopper and look see look I kind of look like zahar hadid, you know Go go. I want now you focus in on zahar hadid. There you go Not too far off. That's actually kind of perfect. You get a pair of ben's golf pants Yes, an old sweater a wig one of the you know, so what get get more Reese's wig By the way, I love that this is an open call This would be like several years ago This would be the photo in a health book of a person that needed to really like work out Yeah, this would be a before picture. Yeah, be a before picture

They go for example as you can see Molly has been eating too much She needs to stop eating But so now ben, what do they want here from uh zahar? Zahar Zahar We're looking for a plus size actor of british south asian heritage Who identifies as female or non-binary now? By the way, let's all just for fun imagine that coming across the desk of an executive in like

Lionsgate in 1992 1992 it comes across Miramax. It's Harvey Weinstein's desk And they go we want a plus size actor of british south asian heritage who identifies as female or non-binary and Harvey Weinstein goes The hell we do. Yeah, so okay. I'm by the way Professional experience is not essential. Let's talk for a minute about the direction that this shitty business We've gone in has chosen because this is actually right kind of stunning. Yes. It's kind of stunning, right? This is a hit show on netflix. Right. It's one of their biggest shows They go we are looking for a fatty boom baddie

from british uh from the who's british south asian heritage Who identifies as female or non-binary? Professional experience is not essential meaning you don't have to be an actor or an actress To be on our hit show to be on our hit show. You just have to be non-binary or A fatty boom baddie. That's all you got to do and I I mean it starts Sahara's in year 11 At Higgs no nonsense independent a little cynical at times that we could do I'd be cynical too because I'm not an actor or actress

Yeah, and yet I'm on this show. Yeah Now listen, I'm not I'm gonna say something here that's gonna get me in trouble But the person who answers this call if they're not an actor or actress should be raped Because the reality is what are you there for? Like I would be like you're gonna molest my kid if I was the parent they go They don't have to be an actor actress just send them on in If you feel you're right for this role, we'd love to hear from you via email only Please send a recent photo a little bit about yourself and contact details

Ben get a photo of me recently. No, we're sending this right now We're sending this right now. I've had enough. Let's make an email. I'm sick of being limited Yeah, and it said that Daniel Edwards casting is committed to yes that what are they committed to thank god Wait, hold on. Yeah, read this chris. Please Daniel Edwards casting is committed to equal opportunities for all performers regardless of gender race disability religion or sexual orientation except on the first page They said you have to be yes fat indian from fucking britain, right? So that's what so what are you talking about? Daniel Edwards casting yeah, Daniel Edwards is a big fat liar liar and but here's the deal I love gulab jaman, which is an indian little uh donut that spits uh, it spits like uh syrup

Okay, um because have you ever had gulab jaman? I I thought that was the new da of new york. Yeah It is But so I mean my point is that who's to say what is and isn't right? You know I identify as non-binary because that's because some days I feel like a little bit of bitch Sure, and some days I feel like a dude. So I am none, but I'm coming out now I'm kind of coming out and I've said this before right being gay isn't enough So I'm not binary now, which means gay plus film. I'm in movies. That's what I want to be

What does actually non-binary mean? You're not you're genderless You're not a man or a woman. You're in the mix you're on the spectrum Like which used to just be called a human being who has different gender feelings all the time like we all do right Sometimes you feel more masculine sometimes you feel more feminine, right? This also doesn't make any sense because the people that usually say it also go gender is not real at all Sure, so what is this binary of this thing that doesn't I don't know? Well, it gets tough because I had I had a very very person, you know, non-binary one of my kid's mom's family members very woke Right all that you know talking where I had a big pool party a couple weeks ago

Right on the heels of the Roe v. Wade stuff. I know that's just controversial But what I will say it's in the pool. We had tt cherry who's transgender You know on of on a rubber ducky float saying screaming that life becomes a conception Right and then and then this person said the woke said said you can't say anything about it You can't say anything about it. You were you're a man and she goes no no no tt said I'm a woman I identify as a woman so you said it because I'm a woman I can speak on these and you know what kurt mesker calls that An intersectional car crash. Yes, that's what kurt mesker calls it is an intersectional car crash Here we go. This is a photo of me

Now I want and it's just too open call at Daniel which right here. Let me just say this comes across my desk. I'm not a meat if you said if you said You know if I was Daniel Edwards casting which is committed to racial equality. I would say this isn't necessarily not a south asian Woman yes, you have a south asian glow a hue to a glow and a hue you could be this could be You know where that's from that's from remember the show at arleans grocery in new york city That's a photo. I believe it might be a mindy tucker. Oh, she's the best mindy tucker Somebody during the riot somebody threw a molotov cocktail through arleans grocery really swear to god. Yeah down in that area

Yeah, but it was a fun little venue. It was a fun little it was rebecca trend. Yeah So now here's what I want to craft I want to craft an email because now get the thing up And what what do they want because they've asked for certain things in the email Please send a recent photo a little bit about yourself and contact details um Okay, we're so listen to this. Oh that last part is funny too. Yeah, let's go back to the last part Let's read the whole thing. Daniel Edwards casting is committed to equal opportunities for all performers regardless of gender race disability religion Or sexual orientation where gender height race or appearance has been specified

We can confirm such characteristics are a genuine requirement for the role So where we are saying That you have to be something It's a genuine requirement for the role, but yeah, we're committed to equal opportunities for all performers Unless which by the way, it's hilarious to me because the second part of it. It's like well, of course Of course, it's like why don't if Daniel Edwards casting just fucking be honest Just say just put a picture up of pumba from the lion thing and say this is what the person needs to look like Okay, Ben, I want you to tell them about myself. Okay. Yeah

um First thing I would say I am over 18 I am overweight And I'm over not being on your show lol lol I am not south asian Ben spell asian I mean christ almighty with him

I am not south asian, but Now keep the period. Okay, but you see all caps. Okay but Now I gotta kind of prove my bona fides as a south asian non-binary person right now. Okay now What is south asian non-binary people like? What do what does a south asian non-binary person? What would they like? Yeah south asian non-binary based in the uk What would I would say they would like fire island? They like the movie fire island

Okay I'm over 18. I'm overweight and I'm over not being in the show lol. I'm not south asian, but I love gulab Jaman, there you go. Is this all caps? No, but south asian means indian, right? Is that what we're saying? Yes, and others and the others I would say but I love Gulab saman gulab jaman g uh u lab Uh j a m u and I love gulab jaman I love gulab jaman, and I also and I love hasan manaj's homecoming king. Yes. I love hasan manaj's homecoming king on netflix on netflix

yes I also A homecoming king on netflix. Yes Yep, okay, but I love gulab jaman, and I love hasan manaj's homecoming king on netflix the Skills I bring to the role are I Being fat Next sentence

I am also Very happy to work With a team of people That really value diversity There you go For this role I will need

To put on brown makeup And I will do so tastefully There you go because of skin problems Can you type any faster because of skin problems it must be all natural makeup We also need to come up with a plan Because we will be accused of doing quote brown face However However when people realize

That I am quote that bitch 100% that bitch, okay, they will forgive us Okay, sincerely Tim Dillon Now go two lines down go Tim Dillon is a non-binary South asian woman A south asian Male Tim Dillon is a non-binary male presenting south asian woman. There you go. Very good nailed it. Yeah, it's good

Who is committed To fat activism Comma equality Comma equity Comma inclusivity Comma communism Comma overthrowing

The patriarchy then hit return indent iPhone it might look weird overthrowing The heteronormative White Patriarchal Capitalistic Violet oppressive

Eco terrorists Jews That's a joke. That's a joke. I'm kidding about that. Yeah Okay, Tim Dillon is a non-binary male presenting south asian woman who's committed to fat activism equality equity inclusivity communism overthrowing the heteronormative violent oppressive oil just say petro say It's the violent oppressive petro narco state. There you go. There you go Send send

Send it. Uh, what's the subject line here? Um, I put Tim Dillon submission, but you're lucky day Uh Now I wish they had Uh sides for me, but I don't think they care if I'm actually an actor or actress You have to be uk based which is it's all It's interesting. Hello I'm in the uk and I'm fat and brown Steve will do it is a supporter of the tim Dillon show and you should support Steve will do it on youtube that Steve will do it

Uh youtube he has a lot of fun things That he does he does new videos every tuesday on his youtube channel. Steve will do it is the breakout star of the melk boys prank collective He uh, see if you can get one of these compilations up where he just drinks, you know He really has done an amazing thing here where he Drinks quantities of alcohol that should kill him, but they don't Um Like he's uh here's a chug addition. Here we go chug addition Yeah, he's you know, this is a uh

he's uh insane And he's you know, he's like this ultimate frat boy But he does good things for people like you if he sees like a mexican family He puts him in the back of a pickup truck and drives him up the road There's things he does it really like You know, so he's able to really drink like this like it's like wild. No the things he does dude I mean it would it kills people like I mean dude. It's like making me sick watching

Watching it logan pole is looking at him like what the fuck is he doing? Oh my god. I mean, this is crazy Yeah, dude, it's it's it's it's crazy watching this It's like really I mean he just got on this He became part of this group by doing shit like this. It's crazy So anybody talking about that they can't make money or they don't have a job. What about this? You can do everyone can drink a bottle of vodka like that or at least try No, but I mean that don't

I guess you'll You'll you'll die or you'll become a famous millionaire I don't know choice is up to you. You want to roll that dice? He's wild with the chugging Dude, some of these are downright uncomfortable Jesus oh, he's that's a bottle of proper 12 Oh, wow I mean, it's crazy. Wow

It's crazy man. I I mean it's but I'm he's kind of he's now doing different things in this. He's not just doing this He's doing a lot of other things where he'll find Uh, like someone with one leg And like design a special obstacle course for them You know, like he's doing different stuff, you know But that's crazy to watch that chugging What is that? like that level of

How do you survive the only guy I know that's done that is that shoe nice 22 guy on youtube and he would have an ambulance nearby Like uh medics right there. You're like out of the shot. By the way, am I looking at our shot? Oh, no, that's just cropped wrong. See look in this monitor up here on the left But I'm out of the shot. Well, that one's cropped wrong is too. I needed so who's in this I did a different monitor I look at both We're perfectly fine actually it's amateur hour every day here folks every hour is amateur hour. My father gave me this tv It's special to me. Yeah. Oh nice. It's the only thing I gave you I

Steve will do it go visit him on youtube Steve will do it He's got over 4.7 million subscribers get him to five get him to 10. He deserves it. He's still here Oh, how about Boris Johnson? Just step down. He stepped down. Well, you know He's a fun guy and but he went he had that party during covet Yep, and people got upset. He's a little corrupt But I don't understand if my leader had a party during covet that makes me vote for him I know not against him. I know, you know, I think what was upsetting to people Is it was maybe, you know, it's it's something they can get them on everybody knows these guys are shady, right?

Yeah, you can't get them on anything. She'd get them on like this little thing um I love that like all the people but he also he tried to get a job for a woman he had an affair with but again It's fun. I mean, what do you I mean that isn't that isn't that feminism? You got to keep her she's got to keep her mouth shut Isn't that yeah, it's like, you know, I liked it You know who maybe these old politicians were the old politicians were probably way worse, but we didn't know anything about it I like that. Yeah, I like not knowing. I like the shadiness of it. There needs to be some type of You know, like these politicians, I believe

Have to have a little fun Of course They've got to have a little bit of fun And it should stop short of you putting kids in a barbecue with the Clintons on Epstein's island Yeah, but You got to have a little fun like He's trying to get a job for a woman that he had an affair with but she's of age It was consensual. You know what I mean? What we know about politicians. This doesn't even this isn't even in the top 10

Fucked up things they do. No, you know now just laying Maxwell. Uh is uh In new york, she's in jail Can she get visitors? No, I don't think she can get visitors. Don't you have a lot of friends in the like cop thing? Yeah, well the complaining at that barbecue where t t jerry was yelling life starts a conception in a robber ducky float The the the with wearing a shirt. I swear to god wearing a t-shirt that said newport not newport roed island newport cigarettes So absolutely the best it was that was her merch So she what she what her what her gripe with the Maxwell thing and how she was yelling about racism t t right

Is she saying why why did Maxwell get 20 years? But r kelly got 30 She goes that's racist. Oh She goes kelly should it why does why does kelly get more time than Maxwell? Here's the reality jisling Maxwell doesn't even make beautiful music That's what I said. Yeah, I said it's not I think what happened with our kelly was that um, he's black Yeah What happens and then no, but he I think he was maybe more indirectly involved But Maxwell was too they can't really prove a lot of what Maxwell did because then it would implicate a lot of other people That are big deal boldface names. So you think 1 000 percent. I'm sure you guys talk about this a lot

You guys but you think 1 000 bonafide a a a list celebrities on that list 100 proven but can't too much money involved They will never we will never see that list publicly ever in our lives a hundred percent And I'm talking about prime ministers presidents Big people in our government billionaires absolutely they're on it a hundred percent Now was that presented you think to the judge to the jury? Look at the people that are just in the orbit Bill Gates bill clinton

Look at the people that are in this orbit, right? These are high ranking Like whether you know ex presidents people that are You know incredibly powerful, right so much money, right? Uh, I don't believe we will ever really know The full scope Of what was going on. We can only imagine it. They have an island

In the south pacific, right? Right. So think about it. You have an island You have a plane that is flying people to an island For essentially sex tourism That's what it is You have one of the largest homes in Manhattan one of the biggest townhouses Maybe the largest per square foot. I don't know, but it's one of them. It's up there. Okay You are backed by the guy who owns victoria secret And the limited is billionaire less wexner. You're managing your quote managing his money or whatever you're doing

You are In business with the woman whose father Was a media mogul in the uk robert maxwell who Uh died very suspiciously on a yacht Um And was believed to be a massage agent and there was articles written about him and you know very Seymour hers like very good reporters have written about the extent to which, you know when robert maxwell died

I believe there were like four heads of israeli intelligence at his funeral for x prime ministers of israel So you have all of these things happening You can only imagine the scope Of this how bad it would be How deep the rabbit hole goes If everyone was exposed because it was probably a us israel us operation Where politicians were compromised. They were blackmailed. They were filmed doing these things with underage people They then

were forever owned By the interest that blackmailed them What would you rather have would you rather be able to see that epsions list or get the role as the fat south asian Oh south asian because I kind of know the epsions list. I guess what it is. You could throw a dart and get to the epsions list Yeah, I mean, it's just not that hard. I mean you could literally I could off my dome Just start writing names and get to the house. Prince Andrew going to prison. No, he's not. It's just not gonna happen I don't think it's gonna go to happen. I mean, I don't know

I would have told you that I don't I didn't think jis lane maxwell was going to prison But she's in and and I still think she might get killed I I think that they need there needed to be a sacrificial lamb because what needed to happen was jis lane maxwell Needed to go down Because epsiony epsiony needed to die Here's what I think happened. I think they realized that epstein might have talked He might have been too much of a risk

He needed to go jis lane maxwell You got to remember I don't know if epstein had like a family jis lane maxwell has lots of sisters and family They're an intelligence family the dad was She might have more of a code of honor to whatever you want Whatever human trafficking honor can there be what you know, but the idea that she has that omurta kind of mafia I'm gonna keep my mouth shut thing or she may die too

I don't know But it does seem at this juncture that epstein was judged this guy's way too much of a risk He may open his mouth. He might have a psychic episode Blah blah blah because my always question with that is how did it all start to unravel like why who let the secret out? So you think epstein himself did it Well, I think well, no epstein was accused by women of uh, you know But why now my point is like why why did it all fall down now? You know what I mean, right? Well, I think somebody had to do something

Well, I think you basically had fbi agents that were like we we we have a case here We have a strong case and I think it got to a point where there was a mountain of evidence where they're You know, there could have always been a mountain of evidence But I think at a certain point what had happened was Epstein served time. He got a sweetheart deal in 2014 for molesting an underage girl And then he was basically released back Uh And he was still having dinner with people like chelsea handler and those people after his conviction, right?

I mean, he was still having dinner and hanging out with very influential people Dinner with chelsea handler. I believe Could look that up, but I believe that's true. That's wild. No, but I believe that's true I believe that's true Well, it's like my father always said and I believe the dinner was after and I think it was like people like katie kirk. I'm unsure Okay, so chelsea handler Uh, recall star studded weird dinner at absinthe home. So when was this though? Uh, it was this after I did go to dinner jeffrey absinthe's house handler told lo. I don't know jeffrey absinthe was

It was like 20. I don't know what it was. It was a long time ago. I went with katie kirk. Yeah, okay So I remember this woody allen and soon you previn were there. There you go. Not a great sign. Yeah So so the deal is that this didn't stop even after he was convicted Okay, um these types of things didn't really stop. They might have slowed down or calmed down But there were more there were people working on that case And and there was more they had victims people willing to come forward a lot of times as victims That come forward, but they they don't have the corroborating sex trafficking has like exploded now There's signs in hotels that say if you're a victim of sex trafficking on the train

On the train you look at kids with their parents and you are they being trafficked. It's like they're their parents This is a real thing now. This is a prevalent prevalent thing. It's always been a big thing I think now with the internet It's much harder to get away with things if there was no internet jeffrey absinthe is not probably going to jail But I wonder if the internet victims couldn't find each other, you know It just makes me think sometimes with the internet getting so big and you can't really every secret can be exposed Somebody's going to press a button going to want to start this thing over again. You know what I mean? Like society gets wiped out somehow because of all this. Yeah, I gotta have secrets

I think the reality was you you you basically have A group of people that have controlled the planet for centuries literally not knowing what to do with this And you can see with a lot of the censorship They're trying to really like clamp down on what you can say and and they're branding a lot of things quote on quote conspiracy theories Right because you know epstein would have been called a conspiracy theory But there was too much evidence and there was too much out already But by the way, they would have classified that As a conspiracy theory if they could have so that is why it's important to be free online and stuff like that

Um, this has been going on forever. They've been trafficking children forever the founding fathers could have been sex traffickers We have no idea Thomas Jefferson They were slave owners. So what's worse? That's a great point. You tell me what's worse. That's right. What do you want, honey? Let me let me ask you something, sweetie. Would you rather would you rather John Adams? John Quincy Adams be slave owner or sex traffickers? He's one of two. He's one of two. Which one is it? And maybe both Well, that's why you get the presidency. My whole thing has always been, you know The internet has been this now it's like this It was the wild west for a while and now people are coming and clamping down and going hey

We got to introduce some guardrails and people have used those words I remember, you know being in a clubhouse remember clubhouse and I was on that fucking nightmare You were killing it on that god. I was I know I thought it was you were great I think you you might have been went the furthest on that Andrew Schultz. He was right and he was right Andrew Schultz is like, yeah the next big apple not be where the Weinstein brothers talk about like math on it He's not wrong about a lot. He was right about a lot. He was right about that And uh, the the other thing was that I was in a clubhouse room and somebody's like we got to introduce these guardrails online And it was this, uh, you know the woman who's at the bumble the billionaire who'd started bumble Whitney

Whatever so this idea And then of course it's like well, that's nice, but what are the guardrails and who decides them right right? So it is one of those things where I don't think they ever want a situation like this to happen again Right. I don't think they ever want Uh, this type of information to leak I don't think they want people organically to to to figure this stuff out And however they can control that in the future. They will well, I'll tell you what you you know I think we're living in this very weird time. I hope I'm wrong. I really prayed and hope I'm wrong

But I believe in 10 years You will look back at the internet and it'll be almost 100 completely corporate right and it will it will look a lot more like Uh, television did where it was just all corporate sponsored Uh, and it had the entire it had an edifice Of you know that it was creative and some of it was creative, but a lot of it was you know This was big business right and you can see it now already happening. Oh, yeah. Well already on twitter I've been signed in logged into my twitter in about two months now I have my girl

Benetia tweets everything out tweets out the dates tweets out and I and literally getting off that app. It's great It has been so emotionally Instagram there's a little bit of it, but not like twitter Well, I did it because I was spending time on it way too much time and I'm going I need to be writing a book Are you back on it now though? No no ben just tweets clips I need to be writing a book writing a movie I need to be working on things that I can that are actually meaningful and valuable I'm not saying it's bad to have a twitter following. It's helped me. It's helped sell tickets

I've tweeted funny things, but when you realize when you look at the sum total of it, right? You know how many hours have I spent on that app and what do I have for it? What am I going to release a book like the tweets, you know, like what have you gotten back from that app? Um, you know, I think I think it helps certain people And it helped me for a while, but I got to a point where I said I got to allocate time better And I got to work on things that can be something because you know at a point in our career, you know You got to start looking at the end game of like, well, what do I want to do? I've had this great show. I want to do this show for as long as I can do it

Right. I also want to write a book which I'm working on. I want to make a movie Listen, you'd love to make two or three, but I'd love to make really one classic movie that people like and uh Put out a few comedy specials that people like After that, it's kind of like, I mean, what else are we, you know? Yeah, I mean, you know, we've talked about this We've talked about this before it's like, you know Now we're going to have to have an amalgamation of things in comedy specifically and entertainment all of entertainment

Right, we're going to have to have an amalgamation of things if we want to really get out of this Because you know, we're not going to get big money on the comedy specials the movies or it's all because but like anything else It's not even about entertainment. Just you got to do something because you love it and the money always comes second Oprah said to keep challenging would be great for the role in that Netflix movie My friends said they saw her do cocaine once in Mississippi in a church Right, and I don't know if that's true. I thought she didn't get pregnant there. That's the whole And what was she's gay? Oprah is well with gail, right? Oh, that's right

I mean, she's gay fully a man named gail. A man named gail isn't laying the pipe Well, no, no, no her her husband's name is stedman and you'd think stedman would lay a pipe Oh stedman. Oh, I thought the guy's name gail king is Oprah's gay lover Very interesting. You've never seen this no open gail Gail king is Oprah's gay lover. Oh beautiful stedman is uh her That's Oprah's gay lover There you go stedman her husband. I believe is her beard

This is again, uh bandied about talked about okay, so this is like a lot of people know about this Well, people have said it Oh, there's stedman There you go, but they are legally married I don't know. No, they're not they're just together I don't think they're legally married. You know, what's interesting at that level at that level If you're stedman, it's like just live in a house Yeah, like they got an estate in Montecito. She's got properties everywhere like just because nothing's gonna get better

No, if you divorce her even if she gives you a care package Yeah, nothing's gonna get better. It's like why you know, like I was with my father this weekend We were in Providence and we drove through Newport. Yeah, and he was just talking to me He goes, you know, I don't understand like why people who get who marry into like these homes like this Why don't they just keep their mouth shut and just suck everything up because we were driving looking at these mansions My dad's like money doesn't solve all problems, but it solves most of them Well, we're living in a time right now where people are actually over self-actualized We came we came from a time where see Oprah Winfrey and stedman grimm had a wedding years

ago, but never got married Right Once their engagement news had been spread to everyone in the world Oprah and stedman planned to tie the knot 93 They never chose a specific day. You know what else is interesting I don't know if he's I got to spend time my father's 75 years old all weekend with him and it's interesting He was telling me he was like, you know, you you you and and your and your friends and your generation You guys have too much So that's why you get depressed all the time because you have too much stuff

You have too many things my father was like I haven't taken a shit in five days He goes if I took a shit today And I that would be the highlight of my day. He goes I would feel so I would feel like a million bucks He goes if I gave you a million bucks, you wouldn't feel like a million bucks because you'd look at one of your peers Who has two million bucks? He goes, so who's rich or me or you? He goes, it's me because all I have to do is shit and my whole life will get immensely better So I don't have anything he goes you have all these things and you worry about the hole in your ceiling

Now you got you know, what car do you want all you have too much? He goes get rid of he was like, I want you to get rid of when we go home get rid of 95 Percent of your clothes. I said that all I got to do is text another girl and have jasmine see it She'll do it for me. She'll light the whole thing I said so so I can see that one two three, but he was like get rid of your shit He goes you have your kids you got your house Get it stop over consuming and I guarantee you'll get happier and I think that that's the big thing Like yeah with the suicide. Oh, we have too much shit

well I believe that there you know when when I when I look at it. This is the way that I've always Uh internalized it. I I believe that different people need very very different things to be happy Right and the problem with the culture that we've created is we flattened everyone the internet's flattened everyone And we basically said that everyone's the same and everyone needs the same things And that's such a disastrous message to people because I know people that are only happy when they're working And I know people that are only happy when they're not working and I know you know Here's the thing knowing somebody like my dad who's old school

Whatever and then again knowing jerry right not even about the trans stuff jerry, but knowing someone I don't know if you've ever got a chance to know someone who's been Institutionalized 20 years or 22 years in prison. She said the comment the reason why you have repeat offenders It's not because they're necessarily bad people. She was like, I will never repeat offend I don't think she will she's like because I I have a home with you guys. I have a life I I love the kids. So I have something to go home to she's like, but it took me a while to assimilate She goes the best thing that happened to me is as soon as I got out of prison Covid happened and the pandemic and the world got shut down because it was a slow assimilation back in society

She said when you're in prison And everything you don't have to do anything your meals are given to you You're told what to do you have to go to bed at this time You have to go wake up at this time and this this this there's she said you relax. There's something nice She said about like socialism and communism where I don't I'm not forced. I don't have to go out and make a million dollars It's not possible. She goes so you're so relaxed But when you get out into the real world after staying in that for 20 years you start to get so anxious She was like that. I need this. I got to have that. I got to have the right smile

I got to have the right No, she's like when she was like at a basic level She goes the happiest I was when I was in prison after I got used to it because I was like I don't have to do anything if I don't it makes sense It makes sense It's also, you know, we listen we live in a country where everybody's told they can be the boss The ceo the star the fucking athlete Everybody's told they can be the best everybody's told and listen

There's a lot of that that makes america like a very great place But then there's a lot of that where it's like nobody tells you what to do if that doesn't work Right. No, but this country does not focus at all on plan b This country does not focus every movie everything made is about following your dream Conquering the thing. Yeah, but there's very little thought given to actually how to construct a life Right in this in this country. Well, that's why for me at least having kids. That's right helps because I'm like, oh literally Pushing my daughter in a swing or taking my kids to school And having providing a life for them is like that's it like what do I have to sell at msg?

I sure I'd love to but what let's break the if you just make everything smaller I think that's what my dad was trying to tell me when he's just constipated and mad He's like just you you have too much shit. You're trying to make your life too big make everything small and you'll be happy I know and that's how he lives because we'll never do it. No No, not at all No, they're not at all. It's also like the whole time. I've been a little worried. I'm half sold out in burlington Yeah, yeah, I'm like, come on you democrat fucking. Yeah I'll talk about bernie sanders. Here's the deal. It's like, you know

We all have these experiences where you whether it's near death or whatever You know, you take a test at a doctor. He's like it's negative whatever it is And you go, how could I get upset about anything small and then the next day you're back to yelling and screaming about traffic Because that's the reality. That's what it is. It's just what it is. It's a reality of life I think as you I was just watching on the plane out here. I watched the anthony bordain documentary I think what you need to do next time you look at your father. You don't have fucking enough You know, I put you on the podcast over youtube channel. What what's your fucking digital media strategy? Yeah, you got to flip it on him. Yeah, you know, are you have any live dates? Do you have representation?

Yeah, I would say if I make my life's one, I get less gigs How are you gonna fucking invest my money to gamble it on fucking fando you piece of shit? Shut up to fando. Yeah I like fando no moral judgments. Yeah, everyone's a winner. Yeah. Um, not my father Where can the people support you if they if they choose to as a white south asian non-binary woman We could support me on netflix. I have my own uh, netflix. He has a netflix special And I'm gonna have one too. Maybe mine's out by now. I don't know Yeah, we we pre-recorded this because we got to do a little vacation in august ben's Ben's going to europe with his wife

Oh, there you go. She's going to europe for like, I mean, I mean these people When they tell you where they go, you just look at them and you go. I how do you people? How much money do you have? They have more money than me these people. I believe it. It's disgusting. It's disgusting I believe it. So he's good. I'm trying. I'm gonna make sure he's able to go for at least 10 days Maybe even the full two weeks with a woman with his woman. I I am just you know, yeah, you'll be by the way Anyone who knows tori birch Please we're gonna do this on every show. Have her contact me Fashion designer tori birch, please have her contact me. Thank you

I don't even know who tori birch is of course, you don't I fucking meatball Um Christy comedy dot com for everything patreon.com says christy comedy especially west you on netflix It's really all you need to know What'd you say you want to promote these dates here? Oh, yeah. Yeah, let's promote some dates. Yeah, let's promote some dates But Chicago theater september 30th. That's the big one. There you go. There you go And san francisco cobs come out your homos. Yeah, really nice Yeah, we're gonna add a show with the philmore and philly by the way. Yeah first one sold out. Um

Because he wants to go gallivant europe, so I have to what country's in europe and slavakia My wife had planned a trip where she's going to see her friend in slavakia and her brother in germany. Oh my god So i'm gonna be nice. You get fucking kidnapped. I'm going to allow him. Yeah to go For a week, she's gonna go for two weeks. She might like to be there a week without you Which is she would with her friend with her friend. I'll go for like five days Yeah, you go for a little bit But you know what I mean the thing about him what amazes him is how much my commitment to work all the time And you know, it's really enriched his life

Oh, yeah enriched his life to see someone and to be around someone who just works Constantly and I know he's got his dumb smirk on his face because he thinks it's funny, but it's not funny Everything i'm doing whether it's whether i'm in real estate I'm trying to fix up a house or or i'm working on this show everything i'm doing is to provide an example for him And I hope I hope he takes the lesson because I won't be here forever one day. I'll be gone and he'll be Sitting there in my fucking house probably yeah with his shit family And I hope he just appreciates what's been done for him. He'll be doing the podcast with chelsea lin Yeah, chug chug. They will move her fat ass into this chair

So quickly she'll play you in the movie about your life Chelsea lin the tim dillon story. I love it. Chris. Thank you so much for coming. We appreciate it. Bye. Bye