The Tim Dillon Show - 370 - A Loud Shape

Episode Date: November 18, 2023

Tim examines an airport service that's mailing it in, Trump's real estate exaggerations, boomers living in the metaverse and how rappers can beat the legal system. American Royalty Tour 🎟 https://...www.timdilloncomedy.com/ SPONSORS: Manscaped Manscaped.com & use code 'TIMD' Shipstation Get a 60-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/timdillon Raycon Go to BUYRAYCON.com/tim TODAY to get 15% off your Raycon order! ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ Subscribe to the channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4wo... Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/timjdillon/ Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/TimJDillon Listen on Spotify! https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1wo... #TheTimDillonShow Merch:  https://store.timdilloncomedy.com/ For every $400,000 we gross in revenue, we are donating five dollars to end homelessness in Los Angeles. We are challenging other creators to do the same. #TimGivesBack

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dylan show. Very excited here. Just a negative COVID, my third time COVID. Thank you, Pfizer. Hey, when something works, it works. When it works, it works. My aunt and uncle both got it. We're at Carnegie Hall. And we had a great night there of comedy. So that Carnegie Hall, Rosebud Baker, Mike Fini. And we do the show. And the next night, we go to Carnegie Music Hall on Pittsburgh, another amazing show. On the way home, I just start feeling those knives in your, in your sinuses. I'm like, oh, maybe then I, my aunt called me and she goes, can you test? Cause we both feel like shit. Cause usually you don't even test anymore. Then I test it, I'm like, okay. But after three days, it's kind of, it's over.
Starting point is 00:00:49 I do want to say thank you to anyone who came out to Carnegie Hall. It was one of the best stand-up comedy shows I've ever done. It's this amazing venue. Louis was in the audience, which is like, that's really awesome to have somebody, you know, at that level of the business, common and joy, you know, all my managers and agents were there. And what you realize when you spend time with your
Starting point is 00:01:16 managers and agents is just, they're just terrible. I mean, they're, you know, they're just like, I mean, they're exactly who they should be. Here's what I'll say. This is not a knock on any of them. By the way, it sounds like it is, but it's not. They're exactly who they should be. Everybody's behaving exactly how they should my business manager, the man who's in charge of all my money went to flight club and bought those little sneaker, the lobster sneakers. What are they Nike? The Nike lobster sneak, this is the man who manages my money.
Starting point is 00:01:51 He went like a 15 year old ditching high school to flight club, gets these lobster sneakers. And then he puts the bands on the ends like in the dressing room or green room of Carnegie Hall, the man is sitting there with the sneakers and then he puts the bands on the end of them to, and then Ray Comcock, where are you doing? And then he goes, oh, it's like the claws, like, you know, the way they, they, they, they bat,
Starting point is 00:02:27 they bind the claws of the lobster. Yeah. He's put in Carnegie Hall. He's putting these bands on the outside of his shoes and he's taking photos of the shoes and putting them on Instagram. He's taking photos of the shoes and putting them on Instagram, Carnegie Hall.
Starting point is 00:02:45 But he doesn't care. They don't care about Carnegie Hall because it's not like 20,000 people. So to them, it's like they don't understand, you know, like they're just kind of like, I think some of them think it's cool. Yeah, I mean, so this is, this is what the guy, the guy has, you know, he's putting bands on the end of his, he want, he just belongs to the state fair. There's nothing wrong with it. He just belongs at his state fair going up, you know, going to attend going here, will you deep fry this? You know, those
Starting point is 00:03:25 tents they have at the state fair where they go, well, deep fry your Rolex, give it to us. That's where he belongs. But, you know, it's good. He's managing my money. So great. A nightmare on the way getting to Pittsburgh. I want to talk about this because I think that there are companies out there that they get, there's a certain, an Airbnb was at this point, there's a certain point when there are the famous quote, there are two roads diverged in a wood. Which one are you going to take? I warn a lot of companies and I do it out of the goodness of my heart. And the reason that I'm correct is that I'm a consumer. I'm out there doing the things, seeing the value of things.
Starting point is 00:04:16 It's part of the job. And I warned Airbnb months and months ago, years ago, I said, you're giving people a cleaning fee of $400 something dollars and expecting them to clean the house. This is going to get to be a problem. People are not going to stomach that. You're asking them to swallow a $400 fee To do something that you're making them do So I I called that out years ago
Starting point is 00:04:53 Because of that I was removed from the service You know, but I was correct Airbnb has lost so much market share Nobody's staying in air being bees anymore When somebody tells you they're in an Airbnb. it's almost like, what's wrong with you? When somebody says that, like, oh, we got an Airbnb. Oh, everybody's back in hotels. The Airbnb thing is over. And I knew it. I knew it. I saw the host getting weird about their houses, getting weird about the rules, how strict they were, and how the type of person that was attracted to being an Airbnb host, I could see it
Starting point is 00:05:36 all before it materialized. And they did not heed my warning. I'm going now to discuss another company. I see a similar problem and this is called clear. Clear right now is becoming a problem of Airbnb proportions. If you were not a frequent traveler, but even if you've been to an airport, you've
Starting point is 00:06:07 probably noticed the, the little clear vestibules, whatever they call them. Now, you, maybe you haven't, because they're actually not in a lot of airports. Kiosks, I don't even know what to call these. Clear is a service that allows you to bypass the regular security line when you are flying. Clear by the way, is a private company. It's funny. Reminds me of when Patrice O'Neill on ONA was like, once you find out the Fed, the Federal Reserve is a private bank, nothing's ever the same for you like it's fucked. Clear is a private bank. Nothing's ever the same for you, like it's fucked. Clear is a private company.
Starting point is 00:06:47 The company in charge of security at the airport, which I thought was affiliated in some way with the government is a private company. I remember years ago, I was on a security line. I had woken up late. I was like, you know, stressed out. And they see you and they pick you out and they go, Hey, why don't you come over here and sign up for clear? And what clear is is they take your biometric data, they scan your eyes and your fingerprint, they run you through a database and then you are all clear.
Starting point is 00:07:26 You get to skip the line and you get to go ahead of everybody else. You don't need your ID to take a, you don't need your ID. Fly without your ID. You're going clear, okay? They take your biometric data and then they go, boom, there you go.
Starting point is 00:07:43 And the first couple of times you do it, it works perfectly. And you go. And the first couple of times you do it, it works perfectly. And you go, this is a really great idea. Wow, look at me. I'm clear. You start getting the airport 18 minutes before the flight. I mean, it's crazy.
Starting point is 00:07:54 You start trying to time it. Like I've missed flights because I've just underestimated how long the clear line would be. Because the clear has now a lot of people So they said a line for clear now In the beginning of it, you would just breeze and sometimes now you still breeze clear promised Find out how many airports it's in when when you signed up for clear they go we are gonna be everywhere
Starting point is 00:08:26 We are gonna be everywhere, don't worry about it. Do not worry about it. They are now, I believe, in, it's not a lot. What is it, 26 airports or something? It's a few dozen, yeah. It's like a few dozen. It's not a lot of Yeah. It's a yeah. It's like a few dozen. It's not a lot of airports. Uh, okay, 51 airports. Clear is now in 51 airports. So clear promises. Okay. We're going to, we're going to be everywhere. They're not everywhere. There's certain terminals that don't have clear.
Starting point is 00:09:05 She'll go to terminals of airports that have clear and they go, yeah, not terminal four. We don't do clear and you go, okay. Now, the clear experience is also kind of become a hell. The people that work at clear, let's just, can we use the term GED? These are not people that have graduated high school with the Regents diploma or whatever
Starting point is 00:09:25 kind of diploma you get. No, it's people that are in a GED course. They're not the most motivated group of people. The people that work at Clear act like you've done something wrong when you need their help. They couldn't be less interested in helping you. They could not be less interested in getting you. They could not be less interested in getting you through this thing in a timely fashion. They are lazy and they do not care.
Starting point is 00:09:52 I don't know where clear finds these people. Perhaps they're people that aren't good enough, God forbid, imagine this to be in the regular TSA. They couldn't muster up the competence to be in the regular TSA. So they now handle clear. And they could not care. Last, the other thing clear now does is a random ID check every time the whole point of clear was like, Hey, it's quick. You don't need your ID. It's, you know, it's blew me cut the line.
Starting point is 00:10:24 We're taking your fucking biometric data so that we do not need your ID. We're, you're scanning my retina. Why would you need an ID? You're scanning my retina. I pay you money. I scan my fingerprint. My one of one, bio identifier, what's the fucking big deal? So I get to Newark about, I don't know, 30, 40 minutes before my flight takes off, maybe 20 minutes before it closes, you know, like 20 minutes before the flight closes. I don't know who these people are. I get so many people calling.
Starting point is 00:11:06 He's like, I've so many like, and I talked a lot of them, these, these, well yeah, to telemarketer and people, but it's just telemarketing. And I watched that documentary on HBO, the telemarketers. It was really good dock and it was fun. But telemarketing and jet, it's so bad now.
Starting point is 00:11:21 No one's good. No one's even good at it. And they're not even telemarketing for anything that has any value. It's just like health insurance and stuff like long-term care. It's like, what? So I go to Newark and I go listen. I got a problem here.
Starting point is 00:11:39 I go, I don't have my ID, but I'm a member of Clear. I say this to the clear people. And they're just staring at me, because they're all high. I mean, crazy, like the level of high the people aren't clear, it's mind blowing. It's mind blowing how fucked up they all are. They just see shapes. They don't even know what's happening.
Starting point is 00:12:01 They're just staring at you and you're just allowed shape like an undulating sphere in front of them. So they're just staring at you like I'm not speaking the King's English when I say this and I say hey I don't have an ID. I'm a clear member that shouldn't be an issue and they're like ah, they're like we'll see. I go yeah okay. They run me through three times each time they want to random ID check each time. Again, after scanning my eyes and my thumb, guys, what are we doing? So then they bring me to the person who's supposed to sign off, you know, what clear after would somebody has to walk you from the clear
Starting point is 00:12:40 thing to the security, you know, line and then, you know then clear it with the person who's checking in all the regular people and go, look, this person's clear and it's shown your boarding pass. I go, here's my boarding pass. So they bring me up to go, this guy doesn't have an ID. They go, okay, we'll try to get a supervisor. I stand there 20 minutes, no supervisor comes from the regular TSA. Like, nobody comes.
Starting point is 00:13:02 They don't even come and tell me to fuck off. I have a copy of my license on my phone. I have a copy of my license on my phone. I have a photo of my passport on my phone. I'm like I left my passport at my house. I have these photos and I'm clear, meaning that they just scanned my fucking eyes. And it's me and no one cares still. No one cares.
Starting point is 00:13:26 Not only does no one care, but nobody tries to help. Okay. The clear line is now getting pretty long and now people have left. The clear people do this. Sometimes you'll show up to the airport and then the clear people have gone away. They're no longer working. They're at lunch. Truly.
Starting point is 00:13:44 They are gone. They're no longer working. They're at lunch. Truly, they are gone. They're somewhere else. So now you've paid money to be part of the service that operates when it wants. They kind of operate when and when God forbid you have a problem. And this idea that if you don't have an ID, you can't get on a plane. I thought the whole premise of clear was that we have your bio information. So, if God forbid, there's ever an issue, you're okay. You're a member of clear. And that was in the case. And I'm just saying out there, to all of the clear people that may or may not hear this message, it's becoming a cumbersome process that's not enjoyable for people.
Starting point is 00:14:26 They try to sell you things. They try to get you to add people onto your clear while you're going through clear. It's never enough. Can you add this person? You know, it might make sense. You're traveling. Is this your first time traveling? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:40 Why don't you add him to your account? That way you can get through. That way he can have all the problems that you have with this service. I'm just saying it's going to be one of those things where if they improve it because it does the premise of it is good. If it's improved, it's great. But this idea, this random ID check all the fucking time which slows everybody down. They check everyone's, they use to everybody's rifling to get their idea. What, what are we all doing here? Why don't you just do? It's the same thing will
Starting point is 00:15:12 all bring our ID. And then you just let us cut the line. Why are we paying to be in a bio security system? It has no value because we're fucking people are getting your ID or God forbid if they don't have their ID. And I mean, I know it's not a problem. Everyone has a lot of people have their ID, but it is a problem that people can have. People lose a wallet. They leave it in an Uber or something happened. And they go, fuck, at least can I get home? I'm a member of clear and then clear is like, I don't know. Also, why don't you just hire a few people that are not straight out of rehab?
Starting point is 00:15:52 Like just a few people on the clear team that aren't straight out of like a work release program if you could, because everybody there could not be more out of it. It makes the regular TSA look amazing. And the regular TSA is horrible for the most part, not all of them, but I mean, if you ever, I mean, Christ almighty, the regular TSA is bad enough. The people on clear, it's like, God, damn it.
Starting point is 00:16:24 What happened here? So that's my, it's just my warning for clear. It doesn't mean that, uh, it doesn't mean that it's going to have the same fate as Airbnb, but it's just my, it's just might if people don't get to rack together. You know, and it's just like, they don't explain the situation with the clear people just drop you off to go, yeah, you just have an idea. You want to fly. That's your whole service. That's the whole thing I signed up for. They act like I'm nuts.
Starting point is 00:16:55 When I, when I signed up, they go, yeah, you don't even need your ID. Because you're in the system. And then they look at me like, he doesn't have an idea. It's fucking lunatic. It's probably a terrorist. he doesn't have an idea. It's fucking lunatic. It's probably a terrorist. He doesn't want to fly. Instead of just being like this man doesn't have ID. However, you know, he's in our system.
Starting point is 00:17:15 He flies all the time. He's got it on his phone. Like there was no, nobody's trying to help you there. So then I had to fly private, which I didn't want to do. I didn't want to waste the money. Thank God our jet broker, Dirk, is was available that day, unless I would have missed a show in Carnegie musical,
Starting point is 00:17:33 which ended up being a great show. But I'm just saying these are the things that unfortunately, you notice when you travel a lot and traveling is terrible now because everybody's overworked. I've mentioned it a lot. Everybody's stretched to their limit. Flight attendants, you could see in their face, want the plane to crash. You could see it when they take off.
Starting point is 00:18:02 Like in bad tribune, some of them just smile now, they want to die because we've made it terrible for them. We've let monsters on the put any time. I'm on a plane that doesn't have an incident. There's no shouting, screaming or anything. There's no hygiene issues. There's no, I mean, thank God, I'm like, I'm because it's a zoo, and it's become a zoo. And the pilots and flight attendants and the crew
Starting point is 00:18:32 all are so fed up with dealing with people. And every day, there's a report of some near miss two planes grazing each other, you know. British Airways crew claimed they were mugged in Brazil had spent the whole night drinking forcing flight to be canceled. I don't even blame them. The people that are up in the air right now are all using some type of drug to get through it, just to get through it. They're on drugs or they're drinking the pilots, every all of them. You know that movie flight?
Starting point is 00:19:12 That's all of them all the time where they're all, if they have 48 hours before their next flight, it is a nonstop drug and alcohol binge from when they land the plane to when they get back on again. They have the shakes when they get back up because It is so traumatic flying now with members of the American public They have no idea what's going to transpire who's gonna open a door? Who's gonna open that hatch in the middle of the air they have to land? You know that so people are basically just like, as soon as I get off this plane, shoot me up with heroin until I get back on because
Starting point is 00:19:51 I can't stand it. People are disgusting. They're violent. They're drunk. They're on drugs. They don't know what's going on. They don't know what's seat they're in. They're fighting each other They don't know what's going on. They don't know what's seat they're in. They're fighting each other in the sky. 30,000 feet in the sky. And these people who are getting paid little, not a lot of money, have to deal with it. The pilots can't leave the cockpit.
Starting point is 00:20:19 So it's the flight attendants that have to deal with the chaos. The pilots are not allowed to leave because somebody who run into a 911. So if you got a military pilot in there who could maybe go in the back and go, hey, what the fuck's going on? But you can't do that because the minute the cockpit door opens,
Starting point is 00:20:36 some lunatic runs in and they try to do 911 again. So it's all the flight attendants that have to deal with the entire thing. So I'm just saying top to bottom that have to deal with the entire thing. So I'm just saying top to bottom, which is why I'm very happy. I got a few more months of Of live shows, which we love and I'm taking you know eight months or a year Well, I won't be on the road of the way I've been on the road because I've been touring since 2021 on and off I've been on a lot of plans. I've been on a lot of flights, international domestic everywhere, everywhere from fucking
Starting point is 00:21:05 Auckland, New Zealand, you know, to Dallas, right? I've been all over the world and I will say that there's nothing quite like, you know, United Flight or an American Airlines flight. There's nothing quite like a raucous American Airlines flight or Delta or God forbid Southwest. I don't fly Southwest. Although they seem to be a bit friendlier like the people in Southwest seem to be a little happier that they're, you know, but there's nothing like a group of entitled Americans. And a lot of the boomers now are flat like the boomers are flying and in large numbers now. Boomers are flying in large numbers now. And the boomers are flying to go visit and torture and torment their children.
Starting point is 00:21:50 This is why boomers are traveling all over the country is to go to where their children have been forced to live and laugh at them. This is what boomers like to do. They go, that you pay this for that. That's the whole point. Any time a boomer gets in a plane, it is so that the plane can land and they can go to their child, their children's house and go, oh my God, this is what, this is what you're living in. This is how you live. The reason for that
Starting point is 00:22:21 is because boomers refuse to sell their houses. Boomers are 85 years old, riddled with four cancers, and will not sell their house unless they make $900,000. They have been povershed, an entire generation of people that cannot get into the real estate market because boomers themselves refuse to leave. There's all kinds of articles about this now, and it's hilarious. Boomers will not relinquish. They're hold on suburban real estate in America.
Starting point is 00:22:54 They won't. They won't do it. If they took a little less money, for example, for their house, if the boomers went, you know what, I'll take a little less, for their house. If the boomers went, you know what? I'll take a little less money for this house. And I'll, I'll just put it back on the market so that someone else could have a shot. But boomers are sitting there. They've got 17 pills. They take every day just to stay alive.
Starting point is 00:23:25 And they pick up the phone and the real estate agent cause maybe we could do this, we can get you this and they go absolutely not. Absolutely not. You will never get this house for under 1.9. They refuse to leave because it's their biggest Kudatah The the boomer Having a mick mansion in a place like Long Island is
Starting point is 00:23:57 The thing that they have that allows them to they're the Lord of the matter and they can they can impress upon Lord of the matter and they can, they can impress upon their children. What failures they are because they don't live in the, in the style that the boomers live in. Now, the boomers, of course, will leave out all the advantages they had to get set house, but they will not relinquish that because that is the thing that they have. You know, this is the thing that they have. This is the way that they have, you know, this is the thing that they have. This is the way that they judge. It was an article why boomers will not move into more size appropriate homes, which I love because boomers are, you know, if, if anything, they are selfish. They like
Starting point is 00:24:41 themselves, which makes them funny. That's what makes them really, really funny. And the reason that they won't leave these houses is because they cannot imagine trying to live in a more simple way, even in like the twilight of their days, in the twilight of their days, they need more space. And then their millennial children can't afford any of this. So they're on planes now, complaining about everything,
Starting point is 00:25:10 waiting for the plane to land. So their first stop is going to go to their children's house and then go, oh my God, it's so small here. It's very small. I mean, I feel so bad for your gen, you know, when we were coming, I mean, we were harder than you guys, of course. And we had a lot more to deal with. But, you know, at least you got something for your money.
Starting point is 00:25:38 You got a little something, but it's like, you're the reason. You're the reason. We have the oldest Congress in American history. These people will not retire. Boomers hold on for dear life to everything, to everything. They are falling down in the halls of Congress. They will not leave. They will not quit.
Starting point is 00:25:59 This is why the world looks the way it does. It's being run exclusively by like elderly boomers who will not leave. They are afraid of not running the show. Um, you know, they will not. Yeah. According to recent Merrill Lynch retirement study of more than 36 hundred respondents, 49% of retirees didn't downsize in their last move and 30% actually ended up moving into larger homes. This is how sick. Some of these people are, they go, I'm a hundred and I want more, I want a bigger home. I want a bigger home to show my kids what losers they really are. That's really what it comes down to. I want to mention now to show my kids how much
Starting point is 00:26:47 better I've done than them. They will not let go. They will not let go. Diane, what's her name? A finestein died in office. She was a corpse for years, died in a, our president. He will not step aside. He won't step aside. It's kind of a common thing to the whole boomer thing is just hold on to it. Hold on for dear life. But I see them, you know, when you get on a plane, obviously, there's people of all ages, but you'll just kind of key in on the boomers and they're just Kenny is very judgmental. And you know, they're like economy plus, you know, they paid just a little bit more. They've paid just a little bit more so they can harass the flight attendant a standard deviation more than the people in the back. They have a little
Starting point is 00:27:36 bit of status and maybe some of them are in first, who knows, but they're all just traveling to some city where their children live and they can go and judge them for how they live. And they never make a connection that, oh, none of us have put our homes back on the market. None of us have God forbid taking a little bit less and simplified our lives, you know, so that we have were effectively locking out. Because by the way, guess who loves the black rock and everybody giving everybody crazy money, the boomers.
Starting point is 00:28:09 They go, yeah, you give me that two million. They love it. They love it. They'll tell you, one of the favorite pastimes of anyone over a certain age, they'll tell you what they can get for their house. I mean, you don't even ask. You do not even, and they do it on holidays, like on Christmas and stuff.
Starting point is 00:28:28 They didn't know why they're doing it too. They know exactly why they're doing it. They sit immediately, they go, yeah, yeah, they go, you wanna hear something crazy? And you're like, and usually when someone says that, you wanna hear something crazy, you would think they're gonna tell you something crazy. You know, like some crazy story they heard. When a boomer says you wanna hear something crazy? You would think they're going to tell you something crazy. You know, like some crazy story they heard.
Starting point is 00:28:47 When a boomer says you want to hear something crazy, they just want to tell you the exact amount of money they have. That's exact, they go, no, no, no, come here, listen, I bought this for 200,000. You know what they tell me I can get now? 1.8. Isn't that something? But guess what?
Starting point is 00:29:03 I ain't leaving front or two. And they're telling this to the people that are in my own student loan debt. Okay. That are living in an apartment where the rent is being raised every year and they're trying to hold on. And the whole boomer thing is to just go pick this up for pretty penny, pick this up from us nothing. Now this is, you know, pretty good. It's worth a lot of money. It's amazing. How unhealthy our society is, is truly amazing. The 30% of boomers moving into larger homes to retire
Starting point is 00:29:38 is genuinely one of the funniest things I have ever heard. We have a housing crisis in America. We have a housing shortage in the country. There are people right now that have been locked out of homeownership for a decade, maybe more because of the price of homes and the interest rates right now. Things would have to tumble so much to just get back to a regular. And boomers are responding to that by saying, Hey, we're going up. We're actually scaling up. We've decided there's a few more rooms we have.
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Starting point is 00:33:11 I may ship my dead schizophrenic mother's art by using ship station. Zuckerberg is out there. Mark Zuckerberg is out there doubling down on the metaverse. He for a while, we thought like the metaverse might be dead or that the metaverse, he, for a while we thought like the metaverse might be dead, or that the metaverse, you know, maybe all future wars will be fought in the metaverse. I was thinking about that the other day. I'm like, you know, we all, we all, you know, or I certainly do. I'd bemoan the idea of everything becoming digital, right? This idea of like a complete digital sphere that we all must exist in.
Starting point is 00:33:48 But then you look at the carnage happening all over the world, specifically in Gaza right now, right? And you go, God, if we could find a way to digitize conflict, why are you making a face? Well, it just, it sounds very matrix-y, like people in pods. Yeah, that's the whole thing. I mean, what are you nuts? Of course Well, it just, it sounds very matricsy, like people in pods. Yeah, that's the whole thing. I mean, what are you nuts?
Starting point is 00:34:08 Of course, that's the whole thing. God, they're bright these people, huh? But I mean, yeah, that's exactly right. Thank you. It's very matricsy. That's the fucking point. That's the thing, you know, the growth in parasocial relationships is big.
Starting point is 00:34:23 You know, everybody saw that movie, big. Everybody saw that movie, her. Everybody saw that movie, her, where Joaquin Phoenix was in love with this, you know, a Siri or whatever. And everybody was like, wow, that's far out. Well, it's not far out. It's actually here. There's a lot of parasocial relations.
Starting point is 00:34:37 People have them with comedians, they have them with celebrities, they have them with influencers, they have them with only fans. We have the people that are on the internet all the time. There's people that feel like they are dating them. Oh, I'm dating him. If I just knew him, if I just met him,
Starting point is 00:34:54 I'd be his girlfriend. I got a shot. That's how crazy the power social realm of this has become. There are people right now, everyone has turned into a little bit of a stalker with the way that things are now. Everybody who enjoys anything is a little bit of a stalker. Now they're like, well, you know, oh, he hated that restaurant. I've been there.
Starting point is 00:35:22 I wonder if he'll go there later. Like it is a little weird the idea of how attached people get To people on the internet and they have this power social thing when they feel like they're your friend or your girlfriend You just don't know it yet. That by the way used to be what skits of phoenix thought Like if you climbed into the way you used to be, what skits of frenix thought. Like if you climbed into Taylor Swift's backyard,
Starting point is 00:35:51 you were a skits of frenix because you were a stalker and someone had to shoot you. Like one of her security had to come with a gun and kill you. Now, if you send her messages and you look up her house on Zillow and you read every article about her and, you know, you're a good fan. Now you're a good fan. You know, you purchase, you love a comedian, you buy a meat and greed or you yell out something during the show because you're like, I just want to speak to this person. Again, it used to be disruptive.
Starting point is 00:36:30 Now you're a good fan because the level of power social has grown to a point where people are no longer happy and content to enjoy the thing that someone's doing. They have to be a part of it, which used to be the realm of stalkers. It used to be the realm of someone who. It used to be the realm of someone who was a problem like that's an issue, you know, but the attachment that people have now on the internet to people they've never met and probably will never meet, but they believe in their head that they'd be great friends or romantically involved with said person is crazy. And it's not a comment on the person out there. It's a comment on some fan bases or some people out there. And
Starting point is 00:37:15 I think it's across the board. I don't even think it's just hot people. I think it's people that people find quirky or interesting or it's like the attachment that people have to people is unhealthy, but it is seemingly irreversible. Meaning, I brought this up at a dinner the other day, people are like, what do you mean? And I'm like, we got to want like because, you know, people will casually tell you they've message someone every month or every week for as long as they've known that part. They go, yeah, occasionally I'll get a message back.
Starting point is 00:37:50 And I go, oh, yeah, but you shouldn't. That's crazy. They know so. So what? I understand as you message me and you're like, you Zionist peg. You don't ever call one guy. You don't ever call yourself Irish again. You Zionist peg.
Starting point is 00:38:04 I'm like, number one, I don't call yourself Irish again. You Zion has back. Yeah, back. I'm like, number one, I don't call myself Irish. I don't shit in the street. My family left Ireland and we came to the new world, okay? And I don't know what makes me a Zionist pig other than having this, no, it does beyond who's going to hook co-host to show them. She just hasn't shown up the last couple of episodes. But what I'm saying is like the parasocial realm is very interesting.
Starting point is 00:38:27 So that was a one thing is very interesting to me. It feels like an irreversible thing. It doesn't feel like it's going away. And I think this thing, this, this metaverse thing that Mark Zuckerberg has been pushing, which essentially is just a more immersive social media experience than the one you have now, augmented reality, virtual reality, whatever. And his company has been pushing this. I remember during the insanity of the NFT at the height of the NFT, I feel like an
Starting point is 00:39:00 old, but you know, at the height of the NFT gold rush. Right. The metaverse was talking about people came to me and I was in Miami. They go, you got to be the first comedian in the metaverse. You got to be the first comic because there were like little comedy clubs in the metaverse where you would perform virtually to groups of people. And there were people out there that would be like, oh wow, this is, so, so the reality is Zuckerberg's dream and all of this stuff, by the way, about tech and we'll add all these articles and posts, but all of this stuff, all of these studies are coming out now about how detrimental
Starting point is 00:39:39 tech is for teenagers. It's causing higher rates of suicide. It's causing a lot of image issues, body image issues. It's causing an uptick and anxiety, specifically amongst young women, but also young men, like anxiety and depression are huge now for teenagers because of tech. for teenagers because of tech. Social media and mental health. I mean, this is the huge thing that tech companies really don't wanna hear. They don't wanna hear about this at all. They don't wanna hear about how vulnerable children
Starting point is 00:40:17 are being exploited for profit, and we're ruining a lot of their lives and their mental health. They don't want to hear it. And, and their whole thing is, I think Mark Zuckerberg's probably, he goes, yeah, but you know why that is. They're still an outside world. We haven't transitioned fully into the meta. Once we're fully in, once we've all uploaded our consciousness, once we're fully in the metaverse, we'll take care of it. But yeah, it's probably confusing for those kids that they still, they're still on outside.
Starting point is 00:40:49 People are now staying inside more. This is a big article that I read the other day. Cities are lonelier, American down town are being abandoned. That's for many reasons, but people are online more people are spending more time on their computers. We never can, you know, we've never kind of fully came back from COVID when the exponential growth of digital stuff got really wild. And we're still, we're still there. and we're probably gonna stay there. It doesn't show any signs of abating, like this idea that most social interactions
Starting point is 00:41:33 are originating online. Children are digitally native, Zoom meetings for work, people working in hybrid work environments. All of this stuff doesn't seem to be going away. Certain people have doubled down on it. And Zuckerberg is basically going out now and saying, Hey, you know, we need to get in here.
Starting point is 00:41:59 Pretty soon, I think we're going to be at a point where you're going to be there physically with some of your friends and others will be there digitally as avatars or holograms. And they'll feel just as present as everyone else. Or you'll walk into a meeting and sit down at a table. There will be people who are there physically and people who are there digitally. But also sitting around the table with you are going to be a bunch of AI guys who are embodied as holograms and are helping you get different stuff done too.
Starting point is 00:42:33 That's his dream. That's the guy's dream. That's where we're going. This is where he's been going. And boomers won't die first. They'll be there. So you're going to have your racist aunt, digitally there at Christmas. What if boomers upload their consciousness and never leave?
Starting point is 00:42:57 What if they never leave? What if right is they're going to die? A switch gets flipped and all of a sudden, you know, everything becomes possible and just for all eternity, you know, people are like, oh my God, hello, I'm here. I, you know, I don't really miss my body as much as I thought. I, like, they just never leave. It's very possible they never leave.
Starting point is 00:43:21 And this man is doing that. Mark Zuckerberg's giving them hope. He's giving them hope. He's giving them hope. They go fuck it, sell my house. I might not even die. I might be around forever. If I'm a hologram, why would I need a small house if I'm a hologram? What does that mean? I work my whole life to be a hologram. I'm going to live in a small house just because I'm a hologram. It's getting to a point where it's crazy, but I'm reading a lot of this stuff. And I was very interesting. There's a book right now called The Dimensions
Starting point is 00:43:51 of the Cave, which I just started reading, which is very fascinating. And it's about artificial intelligence and you know, creating AI people, eventually. And it's about a journalist, a fiction book, it's about a journalist who uncovers a secret government program. That's creating these people. And it does seem interesting to be at this point, because at this point, it does seem like there is ample evidence to go out there and go, hey, we need to limit technology in a myriad of ways, but specifically for developing
Starting point is 00:44:33 adolescence, you have to limit it. There's mountains of evidence, so it's all back now. We have all the evidence now, all the evidence is in. We should limit technology. However, we have all the evidence on TikTok, by the way. I mean, you know, we know what it is. We know what TikTok is. Now, you don't have to, I'm not saying you have to ban it
Starting point is 00:44:53 or whatever, but we know what it is. We know, forget the privacy concerns. We know what problems are there. We know what issues there are. You know, we know that it is your your data your your information. It is going and you know, but that's all of these places, right? It's why we can't take The Republican seriously when they start yelling and screaming about tiktok I
Starting point is 00:45:17 Love hell by the way something I thought of this the other day. It all started with Donald Trump You like an agent of Russia, you know? And now literally the thing that they're getting him on is that he inflated the price of his condo. Like that's how far it's fallen. And by the way, who's the victim of that state farm? Loids of London, like an insurance company. It's just so funny. Like it started with like he was a hand selected by Russia. He's been working with them for years and they elected him and now he's the president. And then after none of that came true, four years later, they're like,
Starting point is 00:45:50 he said it was worth 38 million. It would barely sell for 29. It's like that what? That's what you got. After doing all the digging and finding all of the things, after marshaling all of the resources to pull that guy apart for years, the thing you get him on is that he inflated the price of real estate, which every developer, every owner, everybody has always, that's the whole point of owning real estate is to say it's worth more than
Starting point is 00:46:25 it is and get someone to buy that and believe that. That's every homeowner in the burbs going up to the appraiser and going, well, I think this is about 600,000, right? And the appraiser, I don't know. We'll see. No, I'm just telling you, I think that's what you know, up the block. That guy sold for 650. He doesn't even got, you know, I got a bar in my back where you doesn't even have that.
Starting point is 00:46:48 So this idea that the only thing we're able to get the guy on, outside of the January six stuff, but like, you know, which is formidable, I get it. But like this idea that Americans are going to be enraged, that he inflated the price of his assets, that Americans are going to be like, I can't believe it. Well that office building he said was worth 300 million in downtown. That was probably 170 million at best. People can't even comprehend these numbers.
Starting point is 00:47:20 These are not even comprehensible numbers to the vast majority of people that live and draw breath on our planet. They have no idea. Manhattan real estate, you cannot explain Manhattan real estate to people that don't live here. They don't understand. They don't understand why an office building's worth 300 million dollars.
Starting point is 00:47:41 The entire operating budget of like the county they live in One building and the idea that people are going to be like impassioned by this We are disgusted We are disgusted that he would inflate The pride Yeah, it's all it's all anyone does by the way. It's all and let's go open the books on everybody Yeah, it's all, it's all anyone does. By the way, it's all, and let's go open the books on everybody. Let's go open the books on all of these billionaires.
Starting point is 00:48:09 Are you telling me that billionaires are inflating the price of their assets to get loans? You can't be serious. I am shy. I am, by the way, Bill Clinton on Ep. Epstein's jet 20 times. Never reported, not reported barely a couple of articles. No one really cares. No one cares. Multiple times. Some without a secret service. The biggest human trafficker that we know of, he's on a plane about no one cares. Donald Trump, they're like, well, you know that that's not
Starting point is 00:48:44 worth what he said. It was right. He said it had eight bathrooms. It had six. It has a powder room. That's a powder room. It's not a full bathroom. That's not a full bathroom. It's a powder room. It's psychomic. That's not an Eden kitchen. What are you nuts? You see said it was Eden. What about the guys with some human traffickers play? Well, he's been honest about his assets. That's what I care about. I care about somebody honest about their assets. If you say it's a fifth bedroom, but it's set up as an office and it doesn't have a window,
Starting point is 00:49:16 it's not a bedroom. You go, what? I don't know. She's very funny. It's such a funny thing. Only because it started at the fever pitch of he was installed by the Russian government. You're going to remember that's how it started. It started as he is a, you know, there's reasons to not like Donald Trump. There's reasons to not
Starting point is 00:49:36 want him back as president, but it's very funny to me to start like it's like if the principal of your school called you in and they were like we think your son is a school shooter and you go oh my god what happened did you find him out of Festo what did you I mean oh my god you're crying you're on the way there with your husband our babies the killer and what did we do wrong? I can't believe it. And you get there and you find out that like the reason that they think your kid is a school shooter is they found him like, you know, with his friends like doing some dumb TikTok dance with a gun thing. That there's like, there's a gun like in the TikTok dance. There's like a gun like a rap. And it's like some rap song. And that's why they roll up set and you go, wait, there's a gun, like in the TikTok dance, there's like a gun, like a rap, and it's like some rap song,
Starting point is 00:50:26 and that's why they're all upset, and you go, wait, that's why you think he's gonna murder everybody? Yeah, well, we saw him dancing with a gun, like, it's fake little gun there. And you go, what are you and idiot? I mean, that's what the Trump thing feels like. It feels like you start so high. You can't cash those checks, and then you get down. And then now we're at
Starting point is 00:50:46 he's in flip. I mean, can you imagine, by the way, it started at it is the biggest Russian intelligence operation in human history. They've got they've installed the president. It was the that's the like premise of films. Right. That's the premise of films that Russia hasn't stole the president of the United States. He's being blackmailed by the Kremlin because he likes to get peed on by Russian horrors. And now the movie hit and that's so that's a good movie. You pitch that. Man, I'm all ears. I work in a fucking Sony, whatever, big movie studio. I'm in that movie. I go, so wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:51:31 So, Russia installed this president in a blackmailing him, they got a p-tap, it's fucking great. Sit with me for this pitch. All right, hey, thanks for meeting with us today. Okay, get this, right? So the guy's really rich, okay? He owns real estate. He inflates the price of it.
Starting point is 00:51:47 Well, here's what I mean by that. Market value might be like 200 million. He says it's worth like 280. Yeah, think of that. Is that not good? Is that not a great movie? Is that not fucking compelling? Is that not compelling to you? A rich guy saying he has more money than he does, like every rich guy? Is that not a compelling film? But that's how the movie changed. By the way, that's how the movie changed.
Starting point is 00:52:16 From this guy was installed by a foreign government who's been blackmailing him for years, to, yeah, I mean, he's that condo's not worth that. That's literally how it's changed. I love ear phones. I love listening to music, earbuds, iPods, whatever you call them, but Raycon is the product I have.
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Starting point is 00:53:59 rate cond products by rate condo.com slash Tim. So now the rap young thug this rapper who's going away for a long time here, I think, they are now going to use his lyrics against him in prosecution. This is something that has been happening. lyrics can be used as evidence during rapper young thugs, trial on gang and rackets hearing charges. Let me catch everybody up to speed that isn't aware of this. In rap, people rap about crimes they committed sometimes. And a lot of those crimes are very, very accurate, like they literally say exactly what they did. And now prosecutors are able to take those lyrics and say, this is not, you don't have this artistic license, you're describing something that happened in this role, detail, and we're going to use it against
Starting point is 00:55:03 you. Here is my message to the rap community as a whole because I have some advice and you might look at me and go, wait a minute, you don't have advice, I do. And this is my message for the people in the community of drill rap and other types of rap. If you kill Frank on six street, let's just say that. Why not say you killed Bill on eighth street? I'm not saying probably Frank and Bill are not the names of the people that are involved in this, perhaps. I'm just in my own head to keep it straight. If you, and I don't want a sound racist here, but you're going to sound racist by just saying
Starting point is 00:55:55 what I'm going to say, but it's not racist, it's just, I'm trying to approximate this, okay? If you kill the quan in the Bronx, say you killed Rosario in Queens, make it up. You don't have to be, I know it's credibility. If you say the actual, you don't, you can just fudge it. It's you can fudge it. I know people have gotten very comfortable now where they could just literally go on and talk about a, a, a, a murder they committed, throw them for a loop. You know, use fake names, use fake locations. You can still get the message across is my point. My point is you can still get the message across. You don't have to be glaringly accurate about
Starting point is 00:57:03 every murder that you've committed, every single murder that you've committed, you're going to be accurate. You're like, yeah, we fuck right outside of the bodega on 17. I shot him in the head. And it's like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, say it's the fish spot on 79th. And you can have a fun little chart in the room when you're writing rhymes. You could go, I said, what did we really do? Well, we shot this guy outside of the bodega, change bodega to fish spot and say, we shot a woman. What about that? That will really, that'll throw everybody for a loop, But you have to lie. You have to lie. Like comedians will make stuff up sometimes. People make stuff up. Not me, others.
Starting point is 00:57:54 My point is that a judge has said that lyrics will be admissible as evidence in the trial of star US rapper young thug. A lot of people are not into it. It's been decried by free speech groups, like Jay-Z and Coldplay. I love Coldplay. Coldplay's like, don't use our lyrics. Don't use our lyrics to call us faggots. Like Coldplay somehow involved in this. Don't you dare use lyrics against people.
Starting point is 00:58:22 You might listen to our songs and think we're pussies, but that's not true. Don't use our lyrics. There's a lot of people going down right now. 28 people were initially charged, including another chart topping rapper, Gunna, who's got great music. I love all of their music, by the way. And the way I feel, and this is a controversial thing, but I say, let's sleep big dogs lie. And here's
Starting point is 00:58:45 what I mean by this. Can't everyone start with a fresh slate? Like they should go to a lot of these rappers, okay, the killing stops out. And then if they don't kill anymore, it's like, okay, because it's part of the thing. It's part of the game. I don't condone it. Prosecutors Simone Hilton quoted lyrics in court, quote, I just beat a murder rap. I paid my lawyer 30 for that. There's a few other lyrics in between that and then me and my slimes are above the law. Well, people, you know, yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:21 Well, this is the thing. This is why you have to start wrapping about the cops being good. Throw everyone for a loop, throw them for a loop. You can still do the killing. You can still go out there and do the killing and throw everyone for a loop. Eric Adams is the man, the cops are who I stand. You know, it ain't easy to be a fucking cop. You know, like it may be that maybe that's the move. Maybe like you go the other way.
Starting point is 00:59:51 If you're a real gangster and you're ordering hits and killing people, maybe you go the other way and just do it to Candace Owens thing. Candace Owens could be ordering hits all over the hood. We never know. We would never know. So that might be the move. hits all over the hood. We never know. We would never know. So that might be the move. That might be the move.
Starting point is 01:00:07 The move might be the more violent you are. Actually, you just stay very like, you know, pro cops, you know, they're new song that they're coming out with, which is, I don't know if this is a little suspect, but young thugs new song, Israel has a right to defend itself. It feels, I don't know, it just feels, you know, slightly a little patronizing, perhaps, a little opportunistic.
Starting point is 01:00:41 Young thug and gun as new song, Israel has the right to defend itself. Shalom. Seems odd. See, we didn't talk about Israel and Palestine. I know some of you were like, we're getting, we're getting two in the weeds about Israel and Palestine. But I'll tell you this, I think it's better now. I think everyone's turning the corner. I believe that everyone feels that way. I think Hamas has negotiated the release of some hostages.
Starting point is 01:01:05 We're not gonna get in the weeds on it. I'm just saying I believe that's the case. I'm not, I agree with you because by the way, I get upset with the two, I get bored with it too. You don't think I'm bored with it, but it is the biggest story in the world. So when things are the biggest story in the world, you have to say, hey,
Starting point is 01:01:26 Houston, Texas, there is maybe no tickets left. Oh, you're probably for Saturday night, two shows on Saturday night. It just comes out in the morning. San Diego Detroit, Toronto, Austin, Brayock, California for New Year's, Columbus, Ohio, Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, Washington, DC, Northfield, Ohio, San Antonio, Dallas, Atlanta, St. Louis, Indianapolis, Boston, Foxwoods, Atlantic, up live. It will be announced very soon.
Starting point is 01:01:50 Danny Beach Improv being announced soon too for Lordard L having some fun. Having some fun before we take a little break here the movie Thanksgiving with Eli Roth on Addison Ray Rick Hoffman, Gina Gershaw, Patrick Dempsey, Miele Mannheim, Tomasus Sinelli, Tim Dillon, and others. There are others. I just can't remember everybody's name. Is coming out today, it's out today. How fun is that? Big news. Big news.
Starting point is 01:02:19 Very cool. Well, we thank everyone for listening all the time. We thank you for seeing us supporting us here and on Patreon. And, you know, it's always a joint and honor to do this show. We are with you twice a week. And then we will see you on the big screen. If you go to Thanksgiving, we hope you enjoyed that as well.
Starting point is 01:02:39 And the Wilbur Theater in Boston, we're going to be doing a special there on February. Grab tickets. We'll do a few special there. In February, grab tickets. We'll do a few shows there. Take it, links up. So good luck, everyone. And again, to the drill rap community, I'm a fan. I enjoy it.
Starting point is 01:02:54 Again, if you kill Bill on 12th, you actually, we killed Ralph on 5th. If you killed, it's like clue. If you killed Bill by shooting him outside of the bodega, say you killed Ralph with a knife by the fish spot. Not a big deal. That way the cops and the DA is going, wait a minute. We got Bill dead with a gunshot wound. They're saying they stabbed Ralph by the fish spot.
Starting point is 01:03:27 Do you see how it works? Do you see how easy it is? Do you see how nice it is? Do you see how nice life can be if you let it? See how nice life can be if you let it. Lie about the people you're killing. Lie about the people you're killing. Trill wrap community, listen to me.
Starting point is 01:03:44 Heed my warning like clear, like Airbnb. Why about the people you're killing? Like the United States. We've had a good run and so can you. Good luck.

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