The Tim Dillon Show - 451 - Alligator Alcatraz, Free Diddy, & Life At Sea
Episode Date: July 6, 2025Tim discusses Sean ‘Diddy’ Combs’ trial finding him mostly innocent, why the new ‘Alligator Alcatraz’ immigrant detention center is a bad look, how billionaires showing off isn’t a good id...ea, and why life working on a boat is the best case scenario for an American citizen. American Royalty Tour 🎟 https://punchup.live/TimDillon SPONSORS: Nutrafol Go To https://nutrafol.com/men & Use Code ‘TIMDILLON’ to get $10 OFF your first month’s subscription and FREE shipping Gemini Credit Card Sign Up For The Gemini Credit Card: https://gemini.com/tim #geminicreditcard #cryptorewards This video is sponsored by Gemini. All opinions expressed by the content creator are their own and not influenced or endorsed by Gemini Ship Station Go To https://shipstation.com & Use Code ‘TIMDILLON’ to sign up for your FREE trial ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ Subscribe to the channel: https://www.youtube.com/@TimDillonShow?sub_confirmation=1 Instagram: https://instagram.com/timjdillon/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/TimJDillon Listen on Spotify! https://open.spotify.com/show/2gRd1woKiAazAKPWPkHjds?si=e8000ed157e441c8 Merch: https://store.timdilloncomedy.com/ For every $400,000 we gross in revenue, we are donating five dollars to end homelessness in Los Angeles. We are challenging other creators to do the same. #TimGivesBack The Gemini Credit Card is issued by WebBank. For more information regarding fees, interest, and other cost information, see Rates & Fees. Some exclusions apply to instant rewards; these are deposited when the transaction posts. See Rewards Program Terms for details. Checking if you pre-qualify will not impact your credit score. If you pre-qualify and choose to proceed, a hard credit inquiry will be conducted that can impact your credit score. Pre-qualification does not guarantee approval. To qualify for the $200 crypto bonus, you must be approved by 6/30/2025, and spend $3,000 within 90 days of account opening. Terms apply. The appreciation of cardholder rewards reflects a subset of Gemini Cardholders from 10/08/2021 to 04/06/2025 who held Bitcoin rewards for at least one year. Individual results will vary based on spending, selected crypto, and market performance. Cryptocurrency is highly volatile and may result in gains or losses. This information is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute investment advice. Past performance is not indicative of future results.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Tim Dillon show. We apologize
For our lateness, but it is a celebration of the country's birth
the fourth of July I was out east on long island I had
Some friends come and stay with me for the week very nice people people I used to know
Uh, and I still know them, but do I no i'm kidding. I love them and they were with me
And it's very nice to bring people, you know, out east, out to the Hamptons that don't have
a ton of experience with it because they're always aghast at the cost of all the things.
You know?
A tomato?
So much money
What does it cost so much money
Well, you know scarcity principle
And by the way
There is this idea though out there that everything's a million dollars. It's not true all these articles that come out now. It's like rage bait
They just want people to be angry. They're like this this
Mammal and cost
$400 in the Hamptons and you're like no it doesn't that's not real
There's a couple specialty food stores that you can get really silly expensive shit, but who cares that
You could do that literally anywhere, but it's just funny the rage bait headlines
this melon is $400 in the Hamptons lobster salads $100 a pound in the and
it's always food this potato is $8 dollars in the hand like and it's not
it's actually not yes food is expensive but food is expensive anywhere and obviously it's more
expensive in a place where most people that live there are wealthy obviously not everyone is but
the vast majority of people have the money and
They can charge people whatever the fuck they want and they get away with it
But it's it's just so funny it's like the rage and the anger that people have
The problem I'm having
With all of life right now is this
Everyone goes I hate those people I would never want to be a part of that and
Then they're angry also that they're dead. It's it's not they're not a part of it. They go I hate it I would even if I had the money you hear that a million times by the way
Even if I had the money I would never even
and you go okay great who cares. I'm not a skier. I've I've you know if I went to Aspen tomorrow
I would not feel the need to go even if I had the money I would never build I would never have a
chalet in Aspen because I don't even who care? No one cares what you would do with money you don't have.
No one...
No one...
Someone needs to explain this to people.
No one cares what you would do with the fantasy budget you don't have.
My friends are a lot...
I have a lot more money than I do.
A lot of comedian friends I have have a lot more and a lot of my
You know people I know in the world have a lot more money than I do and I never start conversations by go
Well, even if I had the money, I actually wouldn't buy that thing
It no one care. It's such a weird thing that all people across social
socioeconomic
Backgrounds do it is nothing to do with anything. I've heard people with a lot of money say this
I've heard people with no money say it and it's just this we in this country. We have become convinced
that
We need to be
telling people all the time
the lives that we would live if we could and
How we would be just and fair if we had the things that everyone else had
Boy, I do it differently
I have a friend that goes I'd never get a nice car even if I the money go that's probably not true
Well, I never would I don't care about cars. No one
Who gets a nice car cares about cars?
That's not the way it works
That's not what I was not a passionate aficionado of cars before I got a nice car
I wasn't like in I got a nice car.
I wasn't like in the driveway putting together cars.
I like to build it from the ground up.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You have the ability to do something, you do it.
And I'm not saying that money's the be all and end all
of life.
In fact, the happiest people I know, like really,
and I realized this, I took my friends out on a boat.
We went out on a boat we went
out on a boat we rented a boat and it's nice I my I was a good friend of their
father I was actually more friends with their father than them I like them but
their father was great he had three deweys and a bee we boating while
intoxicated and I got into the boating accidents with this man.
He was so fun, I got in a second boating accident with him.
That's how fun he was.
The kids are fine.
Now, he's no longer with us, RIP,
and his children who are great were with me,
and we all went out on a boat.
I said, I'll get a boat and we'll go out on a boat. I said I'll get a boat and we'll go out on a boat and
You know we drive around
We look at these houses and shelter on even if I had
But then you're up there on that cliff
I don't know if I like to clear for if I don't I can't decide whether it's good to have the house on the
cliff or not
It's long walk to the beach in that. All right yeah yeah yeah okay okay but here's the
reality I realize this now the boat had this nice couple I think they were
dating they were probably fucking at the very least and they explained to me
their lives and I feel like these are the lives most people need to live and
then we'll get into some news and some current events
And what's happening alligator Alcatraz, whatever?
But I think what we need to do is start directing people into the lives. They need to live actually
Truly, it's gonna be a tough 10 years for most of you. Most of you have no idea
What's about to happen to you some younger people listen to the show listen up public service announcement truly. I'm not kidding
You know, this is a special time of of of of to check in july 4th to me is always a check-in
How are we doing? How's the country doing? How are you doing? How are you doing?
How are you doing as you like that?
Math pipe on the couch and there's nothing wrong with that
like and subscribe support the patreon
but
Education is means nothing
Let's just be honest
Being a smart person in our society has almost no value. In fact, it's annoying
Most people don't even like it. It's off-putting
it's annoying. Most people don't even like it. It's off-putting. In fact, if you're smart and don't have a lot of money, people will actively hate you. I grew up with people that were like
somewhat intelligent and had nothing to show for it. That is like the least American quality ever.
Knowledge for the sake of it. I'm an armchair philosopher. I can expound on many
things but I have nothing. That doesn't work here. That's maybe a European trait. I don't know where
that maybe that's an Irish thing. You sit there in Dublin with a pint and chat and talk. That doesn't
work here in this country. So I just do want to tell people that if you're planning on that like I have a cousin who's like that he's like
are you reading anything I'm like you are homeless and I and it's I didn't
really like that I found it to be like pop fiction. That's not what I like. Okay. That quality of per- if that's your plan to just be like smart and well-read
and a good conversationalist, you are fucked. I'm telling you. You are shot.
There is nothing left for you. If that's your plan. I know a lot of people that's their plan.
They are so in love with their, and they tell people where they've traveled.
Another thing, traveling, if that's your bag, you are shot.
If you think you're going to get ahead in life telling people where you've been, you
are done.
Everyone travels and no one cares. No one cares where you've been, you are done. Everyone travels and no one cares.
No one cares where you've gone.
No one cares about your photo.
The dumbest people I know are invariably
the most well-traveled.
They're constantly hopping from Ibiza
to the south of France, to Italy, to Greece,
and they know nothing. They couldn't tell you one thing about any of those countries.
Best case, they remember a dessert they had in Spain.
That's it. They know nothing.
Constantly jet setting is not only immaterial, I'm sure it's lovely and fun.
And I've hopped around, it's fun to hop around'm sure it's lovely and fun,
and I've hopped around, it's fun to hop around,
but it's ultimately meaningless.
If you think you're gonna spend your 20s traveling
and gaining experiences that are going to be valuable
later in your life, it is your shot.
Your shot, truly.
So education, your shot.
Traveling and gaining experiences in the world you're shot. If you think that you're going to invent something that hasn't been figured out before,
you are shot. What are you nuts? We have that. Oh, oh, oh yeah. Oh, what's the aptu shut up?
We have it. Oh you haven't heard of it
We've got it. I use it. It's on here
If you think you're gonna invent something that someone hasn't thought of your shot. It's not happening
If you think you're gonna make a friend
whose
parents own a business and
They're going to then put you in a position of power
within that business
That might work. I don't know
but
Ultimately for the vast majority of you statistically you're're shot, you're not gonna make that friend.
That friend doesn't want anything to do with you.
You don't bring enough to the table.
So if you think you're gonna, oh well my circle of friends, I have a great circle of friends.
You hear these people?
My circle of, I know a lot of people.
The biggest bum is always pointing out who they know
That's the biggest bum thing ever
Well, my friend's mother used to work for a rich guy. He always he always brought it up
He'd be like well my mother works. I forget his name. I'm not gonna use his real name, but he's like
Mr. Miller owns a lot of property and my mother takes care of it for him
You shot you shot Mr. Miller owns a lot of property and my mother takes care of it for him. You're shot.
You're shot.
Listen to me now, I'm going to tell you what you're going to do.
You're going to work on a boat.
You're going to work on a boat.
This is what you're going to do.
Between the months of June and September, you're going to work on a boat.
Between Memorial Day and Labor Day, you're going to work on a boat.
And then you're going to go down to Florida and continue to work on a boat off season.
But in Florida, it's actually on season. The vast majority of people in this country are going to
be struggling against forces they cannot even comprehend that I can't comprehend. Things like
AI that are going to transform our entire society are going to work on a boat. You're not starting
a business. You're not going to run a hardware store. You're not starting a business, you're not going to run a
hardware store, you're not going to invent something, you're not going to
start a profitable restaurant, the novel you're writing sucks. You're not going to
do any of the things in your mind that you think you were going to do, you're
going to work on a boat. And it's not bad. There's a certain type of person in this country.
They're pretty good shape.
They actually are pretty good shape.
They're good looking and not great looking,
but there's a high fuckability factor to them.
They start drinking young and realize
that is how they connect emotionally with the world.
They take shots out of little plastic shot glasses
and then in a bar called like, I don't know,
like a shark bar or the Land Shark or something,
they have like dirty white sneakers
and they're just getting crazy.
To Tiesto's song, The Business. business.
And they're drinking and they see their girls and their guy.
This type of person is the person who's watching hours and hours and hours of Love Island.
They can't get enough of it.
They want to discuss it.
Not only is it on, but they want to talk.
They want to discuss it because they want to discuss it. Not only is it on, but they want to talk, they want to discuss it.
Because they want to be on it. That's the holy grail for this type of person.
Is to be on a show like Love Up where they can be an animal for money.
That's the goal of a lot of what we've created here is people that are just looking to be an animal for money.
They go, I'm fucking sucking, drinking, snorting, shooting, dancing.
Anyway, why not do this for money?
And all of those people have actually, you know, it's, it's the below deck
show on Bravo.
It's any of that.
You're going to work on a boat.
You're going to take people out on the boat.
You're going gonna tell them about
your life and that it's good. And in your head that Tiësto song The Business will
keep playing. It will never not be in your head. And it will be a low hum like
a brain tumor. But it'll be the Tiësto song The Business. And you will be a low hum like a brain tumor but'll be the Chester song the business
I hear down the business and you will think when you're on the boat
You'll look out at the horizon and it's gonna be really pretty and you're gonna say yep
I started this just out of high school, and I said I'll just do it for summer eight years later
Yeah, and and you will you live, you will live in a bottle.
And you will go out and dance, and you will have a good life.
It is a good life. It is a good life.
Shut up.
Stop asking for more than this.
All of this shit is boring.
I have dinner with these people all the time who run the world.
They're boring. It's boring. Stop it. You're gonna work on a boat. It's not
even fun and you can't come anyway. So even if it was fun you're not invited
you can't come but it's not fun. So know that. You go on the boat. You help people
onto the boat. You talk to them while they're on the boat. I mean how I mean this is your life now
You learn about the sea. It's a thing
It's an actual thing
You're part of this like lineage of people. Are you captain ahab? Whatever maybe not but you work on a boat
That is what you do and every night you get drunk
Every night you get drunk. Every night you get drunk at different bars
and you become friends with the bartenders
in this area where you work on the boat.
And when your parents ask you what you're doing
and they say, you age, you're gonna age
because the sun and the booze, you age a little bit.
It's okay, it doesn't matter.
What, who cares?
You're going to be a drunk old witch who works on a boat.
But you gotta stay hot for as long as you can.
You gotta stay hot for as long as you can
because you're selling the image of
you know being like kind of a
You know a boat wench
the pirate wench and
Then there's gonna be a guy who works on the boat. You're gonna fuck him
You're gonna have sex with the guy that works on the boat
Neither one of you are going to have the emotional capacity
to understand anything outside of the physical
and that's actually preferable and beautiful
and it's gonna make a lot of sense.
Your interactions with this person
are going to be confusing because both of you lack
the layers that would be needed to build and sustain
something outside of this drunken life that you find yourself in.
But it doesn't matter.
You don't want any of that.
It's the next port for you.
You're going to fall in love with somebody and around Labor Day it's going to be over.
It's one last fuck and then they're gone and you're gone and maybe you'll see them next summer and maybe you won't you're gonna work on
a boat
That's it. Oh
Oh, you're going to a SUNY school. Oh, I'm gonna oh, I'm gonna be a
Prosecute hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you know hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,'s for the Muslims to have children, okay? And the Hispanics. You are a white, tan,
shipwrench witch and your job is to dance.
And you're gonna, and you're just gonna gonna cuz I was on a boat with these two people
they were lovely people actually like them on and I was
Blasting all these techno songs they were just and they were just driving this boat
And I rented a but I don't want to spend a lot of money on a boat. It was a 36 foot boat
It's not a small boat. It's not a yacht where you don't see them. You're with them
It's me and my two friends. I wouldn't even get that house if I had my two friends I wouldn't even get that house
if I had that money I wouldn't even get the house why would I get that house I
wouldn't even get that house I don't like that house and then and these two
people and you should just blasting techno and they're just like and they're
going up because it's it they I activated them. I activated their deep core
their deep core and
I think that's what Americans need to prepare for the life
You thought you were going to live is actually no longer available to you
But there are good lives and good options and one of them is working seasonally on a boat
Drinking heavily and having a really fun summer. And you become the old person at the
bar pretty quick but who cares the kids get a kick out of you. You're a
cautionary tale. People go we don't want to be like Becky. Doesn't matter. You're
an old witch but you remember the good matter. You're an old witch,
but you remember the good times.
You look at pictures of yourself.
Your profile picture is you from 10 years ago on the boat.
That's your profile picture is you from 10.
People think you died actually.
When people go to your social media,
they think it's an in memoriam page, but that's it.
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Now this ditty thing, I am, this is another win for those courts we keep talking about
how great the courts are. I'm not saying that like we shouldn't have courts or that like
Trump should be a dictator or whatever, but it is just funny that we are talking about the infallibility of the courts and how the courts
You know, everything's got to be decided in the courts. Okay
Somehow think about this just in your own world somehow the jury heard the evidence and
Decided he was this guy was innocent
That's the jury in America
They heard the evidence
By the way, nobody didn't see this guy
Grabbed that bitch Cassie by the hair and drag her down a hallway
Everyone so even in the jury they saw they lied and said they didn't you didn't see any videos of mr. Combs. No
Have you heard anything about the case?
No
He's on camera dragging that woman down a hole by her hair beating her smacking her
They decide he's innocent
This guy is the guiltiest person who's ever lived
He's clearly guilty, but these people This guy is the guiltiest person who's ever lived.
He's clearly guilty.
But these people who are sitting there on the trial, listening to they bring up witness
after witness and then he then he took my head and he held it in the fish tank and I
lost consciousness.
Then I it doesn't matter the details that people were sharing on the stand were unreal. I guess it got to the point
Maybe was the jury like did he just hit do you just hit a wall with it?
Well, you just don't care anymore. You just get desensitized. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah mass rape. Oh
What oh, yeah, okay. He hooked electrodes up to your balls. All right
How does a jury listen to this?
racketeering not guilty sex trafficking by force fraud or coercion not guilty
Transportation to engage in prostitution guilty. So he sent an uber. He's guilty of that
Sex trafficking by force fraud or coercion coercion. Count four, not guilty.
Count five, transportation to engage in prostitution.
Guilty.
He's guilty of sending an Uber for someone to suck his dick,
but he's not guilty of sex trafficking.
So here's what this means.
The reason, and James Comey's daughter, by the way,
James Comey, 86, 47 47 the guy who writes in shells
86-47 you know when you're in a restaurant say 86 something get it out of here could also mean eliminate it could also mean kill it
Weird to write that about a guy who dodged a bullet six months ago or a year ago now
but so you have James Comey's daughter is the person who like
is working on these cases working on I believe Giseline Maxwell and certainly
working on Diddy. Bring up James Comey's daughter it's interesting she's were and
all these cases are tried in the New York Southern District because that is the most
political U.S. Attorney's Office where they want people that have political aspirations
to become governors and mayors and things like that work in that office and get experience.
They toe the line and they do what people want.
So when you're having a Ghislaine Maxwell trial there, you're defining the scope of the inquiry
so that it doesn't embarrass some of our luminaries, our presidents, our prime ministers, or whatever.
And when you're doing the Ditty trial, you also figure out a way, I guess, to not, so that this guy somehow isn't convicted of these charges. So that's Maureen Comey
and Sean Combs. Southern District New York is the same stepping stone for her
father James Comey used to catapult himself to national prominence. The ex
FBI director prominent Trump foe works similarly as a federal prosecutor there
in the 1980s when noted noted Trump ally, Rudolph Giuliani
was the Reagan appointed US attorney.
So, Madeline Comey is the person
who's like handling all of this stuff.
Maureen, sorry, not Madeline.
Maureen Comey offered the prosecution's rebuttal
prior to the jury being sent off
to deliberate to charges against Comey.
Maureen Comey argued from the day as that Combs never thought the woman he abused
would have the courage to speak out loud about what he had done to them and
suggested the rapper believe he was untouchable.
So, and she also offered arguments that Combs had been involved in fire bombing a
Porsche owned by Kid Cudi, whatever.
It's clear that P.
Diddy was running some type of honey pot in the same way that Epstein was. It's clear that P. Diddy was running some
type of honeypot in the same way that Epstein was. It's clear to most people.
All we see in our society is notable figures that get caught having these
parties, taping people, recording people against their will, and they all get off
or they all die. They're all killed or they all get acquitted. Or like
Just Lane, they're doing a, you know you know, whatever 10 15 years or something in jail
But no other names ever come out
Nobody else is connected. These are huge networks of people
the scope of the inquiry into these is like very small and
Then these guys just went from Epstein to Diddy. They just kind of like they die they get acquitted
You know, and I mean this is like
This is one of those things you're just gonna have to accept that's the way it works
There's not going to be like a huge
Moment where they just cart off everybody
Who has all this money and power and and implicate them in all this shit.
It's one guy.
It's like P Diddy.
It's just one dude and was a monster for sure.
And then he'll get off.
The jury just lets him off.
I mean, the jury, I mean, the jury about to let Epstein off the jury.
You're dealing with American people in the jury.
You're dealing with your own citizens in the jury.
The people that I talked about on the boat are in the jury.
Let's get down to business.
And they're listening to this,
and the tiestos to business is playing in their head
during the entire trial.
Let's get down to business.
Let's get down to business. Let's get down to business. Let's get done. I love that. I love that. I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that.
I love that. I love that. I love that. I mean he clearly killed this woman But I was in a jury by and I'm telling you right now that I
mean
Good luck. Good luck
Now I don't know what he's gonna get some some people are saying
They're gonna send some for whatever they're gonna throw the book at it, but what is the book?
He was not convicted on the charges of the things he did.
He was convicted on like he transported someone for
sex, but he, you know, the sex trafficking.
So I mean, this is the way it can happen.
You're going to see these things will pop up occasionally. Every so often, gonna see these things. They'll pop up occasionally
Every so often you're there one of these guys is gonna is gonna pop up. He's gonna get charged with something
You know, it's gonna be salacious
like all the details that come out are gonna be crazy gonna be like a private island and
And then he'll be convicted of jaywalking. I mean they'll plead it down to nothing. It'll be nothing
It'll be like he had a private island and a fuck machine and he'd strap the politicians in it
And they would have orgasms and then and then they're like, what did they convict him of tax fraud?
Like it won't matter
It won't matter. This is what you should realize by now
The more ridiculous the stories are the less they're going to get convicted of.
Those start getting convicted of like, you know, traffic violations and he's going to
do a few years.
I don't know how long he'll do.
I don't know what he'll do, but this is not like, you know, this guy's not going away.
None of them are.
None of them are. None of them are.
Ghislaine Maxwell is sitting there
and they're figuring something out.
They'll either commute her sentence,
they'll let her go, they'll kill her.
Something somewhere will happen
where they'll figure that out.
But Epstein's either still alive somewhere or dead.
And then Diddy's he's you know he gets
elite because you that's the way it works you you you can't bring everyone they still
need to do this they still need to entrap people like this even though with technology
it's less and less of a thing they still need to have the ability to do this imagine pitching the next diddy and and he's going, well, we'd like you to do this, that, you know, he's going to go, hey, what happened to these fucking people?
Now they can go, oh, Epstein's actually still alive and Diddy like just is doing a year.
And then the person goes, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Oh, I'll do it.
Yeah, parties.
And I just put the cameras on.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fine.
You got to always be able to, know, protect your people protect your assets
out there
And I just think with the American jury pool now, it's probably easier than you think to get people off
They're not paying attention
All you have to do really is look at them and like say something in a way. They're like human trafficking
People are asking you to believe that
the man over there is a human trafficker. He's trafficking people. Did you see him
do it? No. I didn't see him do it. This is the types of people in the jury box. That's their voice. That's the way they all sound
What even is human trafficking I ask you that
I want to drink a water a
Lot of people have said a lot of stuff on that stand, but it's all lies.
Yeah, okay.
They lied.
Yeah, they did.
That's what you're getting. That's what you're getting. Those are the- this is the caliber of person that's in there.
This is the caliber of person that's in there. The caliber of human being in the jury can be convinced after, I don't know, 7,000 people
testify that this guy brutally raped him.
They just go, well, yeah, but they get in that jury room to deliberate and they all
forgot what they heard.
Somebody's like, it sounds a little ridiculous,
a lot of what they were saying there.
It sounds a little ridiculous, actually.
I've had sex two times and it sounds like a little
ridiculous what they're saying.
It sounds like a lot of them are making it up.
I actually don't think you can have sex in the ways
they were describing.
I don't believe it.
The jury room is a bunch of people
that should not be allowed to like decide the fate of anything and they're they're tasked with
deciding this. But that's why the Maureen Comeys of the world are there to kind of guide the
prosecution so that they're not like completely focused on the entire thing.
Diddy knows a lot of shit.
It's clear.
He's friends with politicians.
He's friends with everybody.
And he's getting off.
He's getting up.
They're all coming.
I said this.
I predicted this months ago.
Everyone's coming back.
If cancer doesn't get Weinstein, he's coming back.
Everyone's coming back. There's, there's, Diddy will be in the Hamptons by August perhaps. I don't know but I mean he's gonna be
there'll be a documentary in a few years being made by a
Diddy truth or who will explain to you?
How the entire thing was like the result of like one disgruntled employee watch watch
predicting it now.
People go, what really happened there? What even was that? And it's always this guy, it's like with Epson already doing it. They're already like, what is this intelligence connection these people bang
on about? What do you, why would you even suggest that? It's literally direct quotes from people
going, I was told not to pursue the investigation. He was quote, you know, owned by that. It's literally direct quotes from people going I was told not to pursue the investigation he was quote you know owned by intelligence it
had become an intelligence matter he belonged to intelligence that was a
direct quote he belonged to intelligence that's literally a quote and then there's
people coming out and I go why would you even say that it's just gaslighting on a
huge level I have what did he they'll just start talking about it was just
employees it didn't like it
You weren't there parties people can tape doing weird stuff raping people. They go. Yeah. Yep. It's just somebody didn't like them
It was like, you know, I think his driver or something though. It'll always be framed as
something other than probably what it is, which is a
Honeypot operation being run by our government.
They're not gonna say that. They're not gonna go well you know we enforce a lot
of social and cultural things by just entrapping everyone and bonding
them in the sense that it's mutual assured destruction and they all have to
kind of go out and say the things we kind of want them to say or we're gonna have a huge problem.
They're not gonna say that.
They're just gonna say, well this was like, yeah this guy, he got like mixed up in a few things. He's like mixed up and there was a whole, and I'm not some crazy moralist, you wanna have an orgy, you have an orgy, but if people are getting on the stand going, I was raped, I was raped, I was raped, I was beaten, I was raped, I was beaten, I was raped, then I was raped, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten, then I was beaten stand going I was raped I was raped. I was raped. I was beaten. I was raped. I was beaten
I was raped then I draped then I was beaten then I was beaten then I was beaten I was raped
And then the jury's like no you weren't
Shut up
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The new immigrant detention center constructed
in Florida's Everglades, Alligator Alcatraz,
was built in eight days and now it is flooding.
Trump's people are building a immigrant detention center in the middle of the swamp.
Part of this money is this big, beautiful bill that they passed where they're going
to use a chunk of it for the deportation of people. I've said like Rogan and other people that the immigration raids that are random are
pretty barbaric.
And I think they will ultimately lose support for Trump and the idea of having a secure
border which I think is an important thing.
But because they are random
You're you're collecting people that are law-abiding
That have been in the country a very long time that have committed no crime
You're picking people up in church parking lots at high school graduations. It's inhumane and
And I think a lot of people feel that way
But in fairness to the Trump team, they did think of this and say, what if we put them all in a prison surrounded by alligators? Would that make it feel more humane? And it's that type of forward thinking that I
think we should appreciate. Like I think Trump and his people were like, sure, people find these
raids to be a bit abrupt and, you know, soulless, unkind. But if we then took the people we swept up and put them in a prison
built in an alligator swamp, would that make people feel better about it?
So I think they're at least recognizing that their policy has been a bit controversial
and they're saying, how could we make it more palatable?
What about a fortress surrounded by lions?
Would that make more sense?
If we got a bunch of gardeners who are in the country legally and people are like, well,
that seems a little fucked up
And you're like hold on a minute. You don't know where we're taking them
I'm like oh weird like see a judge or something. No, we're taking them to a fortress
surrounded by lions
What if we put them in a cage in a snake pit?
Have we thought about that?
in a cage in a snake pit? Have we thought about that?
Because I don't think alligators
are the only animal we could consider
because America, the great thing about it actually
is that there's many different regions
and many different kind of killer animals.
Bear with me, I spent a lot of time
on the East end of Long Island, no offense.
Montauk, the tip of Long Island,
a underwater penal colony.
It's a big shark cage.
And the migrants are in it and the sharks keep swimming by them.
Why stop at alligators?
Now I know you might say, well, it seems inhumane to just surround people with wildlife that
could kill them.
Sure. But we've got
a lot of wildlife.
We don't pay alligators.
Here's the good news.
They're free.
Now I mean, I'm just saying it's a great way, I think, to show that it's not just a heartless
policy. It's a policy that we've put a lot of thought into. And
one of the thoughts we've had is what killer animal lives in which region and what type
of prison could we build in said region where the killer animal lives. For example, you could you could do something with jellyfish, sharks,
snakes, brown recluse spiders are too small, but I'm thinking like mountain
lions of fun northern California migrant prison
Surrounded by Pumas that just pawed the glass
Now you might be saying well that seems inhumane I
guess
But I think it's it's good that that's the direction we're moving in it
It's good that we're moving in this Tiger King direction with border enforcement. It seems great. I don't think it'll have any backlash
No backlash at all
Just like the election of mandami isn't the backlash for all these idiots like Daniel Loeb and all these guys tweeting It's gonna be a hot commie summer the black men types take their phones
All these billionaires in the Hamptons tweeting
about Mondami, every time you tweet about him,
the guy goes up and he's gonna win again.
He's gonna win.
And maybe it'll be good, maybe not, I have reservations,
but at the end of the day, if you keep tweeting
and then people Google your house and hit image,
you're fucked, shut up.
So it does seem to me that there's a chance
that this will have backlash, there'll be a backlash to this.
Taking people off the street, masked people,
grabbing people off the street,
and then sending them to a prison surrounded by alligators
and sending them to a prison surrounded by alligators
feels like eventually people are going to be
persuaded that actually if this is the way to have a immigration policy,
a lot of people are gonna go, well, I guess just fuck it.
If it's going to be so over the top and insane and so disruptive and so
inhuman and we're putting six year old girls in handcuffs and we're locking people up,
now the hardcore base of his will love this. They will love it. They'll think it's great.
They'll think it's great that people are in a cage and they're surrounded by lizards.
They will enjoy it. But the vast majority of people I think will probably
look at all of this and say this is a little absurd and it doesn't seem like a first world
country a first world country locking people in a cage in the middle of an alligator moat
seems to be not the way as a first world country, and again as a guy that believes that we should have a very strict immigration policy
and if you're a criminal you should be removed, and even people that have come here recently
perhaps have to go as well because they don't have the roots in places and I believe in that you have to come here and you know speak English and assimilate.
I believe all of those things for your own success and the success of overall society. These guys in masks plain clothes officers in masks performing raids ripping people and putting them in a
Prison in the middle of the Everglades
Does not seem like a first world countries thing to do
I'm all for people seeing a judge and having an expedited removal process.
You're not even going to get rid of everybody.
You can enforce e-verify, which holds employers accountable.
If Trump was putting the employers of illegal labor
in this prison, then that is different.
If you're going to put everyone in it,
if you're going to put everyone in it, if you you're gonna put all of these guys that have encouraged this and
Are paying these people no money if they're gonna go in the prison with them
Then that's great
but if you're not going to do anything against the people who are
profiting from
Undocumented workers and you're just gonna go around and throw gardeners in a in a in a zoo
It's an exhibit from a zoo. I mean, why don't we just why even build a prison? Let's just commandeer the Six Flags Safari
and do that
Why even build a prison go into the Six Flags Great Adventure Safari or
Busch Gardens or any of the safaris. You already have the nature, the natural
environment with dangerous animals. Go down there and and and then just say this
is the immigrant prison now. Remember Six Flags? Now it's the immigrant prison the six-leg safaris
the immigrant prison why not well I mean it seems if this is the solution to the
but we have prisons right don't we have pre do we need special detention centers
where nobody has any rights and the Constitution doesn't apply and it's in the
middle of an alligator pit.
It just seems to me that it's a recipe for something very bad and very dark, especially
when people start piping up.
I don't really love this Palantir.
Why are we giving Israel all this money?
Who's going to eventually find their way into this prison system, by the way? Who's gonna eventually find their way into this prison system by the way? Who's gonna find their way into this? I don't know. I'm
sure citizens will begin to see the inside of the Everglades detention
facility a thousand percent. The idea that citizens won't go into these places feels like a very, you know, a very unrealistic thought.
That it will just be the worst of the worst.
If I was convinced that these were the worst of the worst, rapists, murderers, and they're
here illegally and they go to this prison and then they're deported, I'd go, yeah, great.
I feel like it will watch.
It'll start like that and then it'll be just any immigrant and then it might be a citizen who acts up
Because what?
Makes a citizen would might change
So the idea of letting the government handle this money to Palantir
build a digital police state also construct a labyrinth of of of
prisons Because this won't be this will be
number one but coming soon to a theater near you there'll be others letting the government
do all of this stuff and then just sitting back and saying we hope it's used for the of the worst is is not a good plan giving all this power to people that run
your country who might it might be AOC next are you gonna like that when AOC
has got a bunch of prisons and a ton of power and a ton of extra judicial power
and we know the courts are not the Beal End All but like
AOC can do anything she wants and
The president has all this power and there's a lab or the J now AOC has a digital police state that Palantir is built for her
Is that gonna work? Would you like that? Is that gonna be fun?
does anyone think that's a good idea and the culture swings far to the left and
The mom mom Donnie types get elected and they're going after people's money. They're shutting your digital banking off and
They're enforcing
Hate crimes laws like they do in Britain where a woman tweeted, burn the migrant hotel. Again, not a thing I would have tweeted,
but is now doing eight months in jail. Is that going to be good?
Do we want these prisons set up around the country
for when people decide, Hey, by the way,
we don't love what you tweeted about Islam or about migrants or about anything. We don't love what you tweeted about race. We don't love what you tweeted about Islam or about migrants or about anything.
We don't love what you tweeted about race.
We don't love what you tweeted about Israel.
We think what you're tweeting is a hate crime.
Is it a good idea to have a digital police state being built by Palantir and then have
a labyrinth of prisons that we hope are just used for the wink, wink worst of the worst?
Wink, winkink-wink.
It'll just be the worst of the worst. So you know I believe there's a hundred
million dollars in the bill, in the big beautiful bill being doled out to
different organizations to fight anti-Semitism. By the way, can I be one of
those organizations? How do you become one of those? What is the accredited system you need to become an institution that fights
anti-Semitism? Can I get government money to fight anti-Semitism? I would love to do
it. I'll do it right now. I will do it right now if I get a little bit of money because
there's a lot of money in that bill that goes to things like that.
So giving people more and more power over your life and saying that you hope that it
is used and again I am a proponent of building the American working class, eliminating, I
don't think it's a good idea. I think what's
happening in Britain now is wild. The entire society is being torn apart because the amount
of immigrants and migrants that they have resettled in the past 10 years has torn the country apart.
It's been an absolute abomination for many countries in Europe,
the Netherlands and Britain, trying to assimilate people from a vastly
different culture overnight into an existing economic, political, cultural
landscape that has been developed over hundreds or thousands of years. And the
idea that there's not going to be significant growing pains,
economic disruption, cultural issues,
that there's not going to be issues with the court system,
with the way communities are reacting to each other,
the way that crime is looked at,
the value systems that are vastly different.
These are huge problems.
It's the biggest issue in the world.
It is not Vladimir Putin and it's not Iran.
The biggest issue in the world right now
is the mass migration of people from one area to another.
It's the biggest issue in the world.
First world societies dealing with immigration
from largely the third world.
It is the biggest issue.
It is motivating all the political change in Europe,
all the political instability in Britain,
in the Netherlands.
This is becoming, and the way that it's being dealt with
is as a lot of these countries are enforcing literal totalitarian speech
regulations where you will be dragged out of your house put in handcuffs and
put in jail for a tweet and if you think it can't happen here you're wrong but
it's happening there right now if you tweet the wrong thing if you say the
wrong thing if what you were if what you say is considered a hate crime, you can actually go to jail.
If you express a displeasing sentiment to the government, you can be put in jail for something that you've said online.
During 2020, in George Floyd and all that stuff, lots of people were fighting white people, were tweeting white people should feel pain, da da da da da, all kinds of things
that could have been interpreted as a threat of violence.
I didn't want to see any of those people in jail.
I didn't even want to see that.
I didn't want to see them kicked off social media.
I'd say people can vent their frustrations and they're saying things and a lot of it's
high emotion and whatever, but I don't want any of those people deplatformed.
And I certainly didn't want them in jail
So this is a massively
Complicated issue that is driving lots of people
but
ripping people that are working at a job
Throwing them in a truck putting them in an alligator prison
Giving the government
the ability to deport them to El Salvador.
Not a judge involved, no rights.
People that criticize Israel on a college campus being picked up, people that wrote
op-eds.
It is very much the beginnings of a police state.
Now obviously immigration is a real issue and
you're gonna need to detain people and deport them. But the way you do it
matters, the optics matter, the actual process matters because if you think it
will just be the worst of the worst, immigrants that have committed crimes,
it's not. It will be anybody they want. And soon it'll be American citizen,
and it probably is ready.
And now the other, the digital part of that
is the giveaway to Palantir and the AI.
We're not gonna regulate artificial intelligence.
And no local municipality will be able
to regulate artificial intelligence.
And the AI tech guys are going to build an Orwellian digital police state, and then there
is a brick and mortar police state being built with prisons all over the country.
And you just have to hope that the people in those prisons are your enemies Because at the end of the day there's no guarantee that what those prisons were originally built for is what they'll be used for
You have to be smart enough to think about that when they passed a Patriot Act
when they said
we're going we're doing this because of terrorism and because of 9-eleven and
We're doing this because of terrorism and because of 9-11. And then it was used to spy on Americans and surveil Americans and it created this.
This is what happens.
When you give the government powers, you can never take them away.
It doesn't take them away.
So if you have any concern with freedom, with autonomy, with the ability to live your life,
express opinions on the internet, off the internet,
and you don't wanna live in a police state,
stuff like this has to disturb you,
that bill has to make you think a little bit,
not only about, obviously,
whatever people are getting thrown off Medicare,
which is tragic, but also something
that happens all the time.
People get kicked off their healthcare all the time.
We have a terrible healthcare system.
But the larger story to me will be,
is this the beginning of the way they deal with people
when AI starts eliminating all of the jobs?
Is this, and I'm not saying everyone's going
to Alligator Alley, or but alcatraz whatever it is
But is this the beginning is this?
The beginnings is this the architecture of the type of country that we're gonna live in
where you're able to be disappeared and
Whatever you say on social media is going to be considered a crime, a thought crime. And are you going to be able to be disappeared? What rights will you have?
And what are you allowed to criticize? And whom are you allowed to criticize
without significant retribution? Those are real things that people should think
about. So it's not just like, wow, happy fourth day, he's innocent and we're all
happy about that. Obviously we are and obviously it's good to know that he's
gonna come home to his children and continue to be a good father. But there
are definite things here that you should pause and go, wait a minute.
Should we be constructing a lightning prison?
Should we be constructing a prison where the electricity we put on top of a mountain and
it just lightning hits it?
It just seems crazy. I don't know that we need to build these types of places
because there's going to be a significant backlash. There was a significant backlash
to Wall Street guys running America for 50 years and you's you're gonna see it one of it was Donald Trump by the way
That was backlash number one
You're gonna see it in New York City. You're gonna see that the center is completely gone
any you have people in the far left now people in the far right, but
Everybody and that's why every article is like, do you know how much it costs for a cup of sand to the
Hamptons? That's a thousand dollars.
These Hamptons beaches where you bring your own sand and it's $80,000 a day.
I just want to start producing fake articles.
This hot dog is $10,000 in the Hamptons.
A hot dog made out of solid caviar
Truffle gold is being eaten in I just want to start producing fake
Videos and see if they'll they'll they'll get traction
Being like this baked clam is
$15,000 in the Hamptons
Called the called the platinum clam. It's a regular clam shell
Stuffed with platinum. You can't even eat it. It's
$15,000 I mean
It's it's it's the
inevitable reality of any society that flaunts their wealth to the degree that this
society does that there will be some type of upride.
You can't do this to people forever.
You can't do this to people forever.
You can't eat like $300 popsicles on your $80 million yacht while people are dying of
cancer because they can't afford chemo.
You can't do this forever and then expect people to just not lose it. People are gonna lose it.
They're gonna lose it. You can't have 35 shows about these bimbos selling real estate.
these bimbos
selling real estate
You just can't while people are getting evicted
People are getting evicted and in their final night in their apartment. They're watching
selling sunset
We're models sell
Mansions to criminals and they're and they know tomorrow they have to wake up and go live in a halfway house
You can't do it
You can't write articles about the golden chicken nuggets that some billionaire is feeding his kids in East Hampton
While people are sitting in an uber
Driving from one part of the city to the other,
like, and then when the person gets out of the Uber, they shut off the air conditioning,
because they can't afford it, until they pick up the next guy.
They can't afford the a- I've had conversations with Uber drivers about,
it drains the gas too much, I turn it on when I get a rot.
Like, people are fucked.
And the more you throw it in their face
The more they're gonna lose their mind. They're gonna elect anyone
They'll elect Isis
if
Isis got up and was like we should have you should be able to afford rent people go alright
Did he did he could win on that platform right now it's not about it's about the fact that people have been
completely abused and financially they don't know what to do I get it I have people come and stay in
my house and it's again I'm like the poorest guy that lives out there and
And we go to a farmers market and they look at this shit and they're go. Yeah, I mean they're like what the fuck
It's so beyond
And I'm not saying everything has to be for everyone. I'm not saying everyone should live whatever and in fucking you know
Manhattan or any of these expensive places. I'm saying you can't shove it in people's face like this
It's too much
Jeff Bezos and Lauren said they have this wedding. They don't even do it in America
They don't even give jobs to Americans do it in Aspen you pigs
They do it in fucking Italy
Do it in Venice. They got Leo and all these people standing there. I mean
Dude, in Venice, they got Leo and all these people standing there. I mean, people are looking at that, they're reading about that wedding.
They have three kids in an old minivan and they're driving around Texas and it's 115
degrees.
And they're sweating and the food they bought is starting to spoil because it's so hot and
they're rushing to get back to their house to throw it in a refrigerator and
they hope the grid doesn't go down and they've got the kids in the backseat
screaming you know and the kids are like mommy turn this off who is this and
she's like I'm listening to Tim Dilley's a genius he's the only one who understands this world and these kids are fighting each other she goes stop
fighting and they go put on something else and she goes shut up I'm listening the only man worth
listening to on this planet without his voice I'd be dead you don't keep me alive he does
this scene is playing out across this country.
It's playing out across this country.
It's playing out across this country right now.
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What was I saying?
The point is this.
You can't continually fuck people in their face
and have them go, thank you for that.
I appreciate you.
These billionaires have gone out of their mind. Stop it. What are you doing? Bezos, this is your second wedding. You're bald.
Just do something quiet.
What are you doing?
They've become super villains. Musk, Bezo, they all supervillains. Zuckerberg, all these freaks.
I'm telling you the next wave is going to be...
It's going to be... It's gonna be so radical and so understandable.
Not that I'll even agree with its aims.
But like...
Because those things tend not to work.
When you seize the means to protect, none of this works.
You need to incentivize people to make cool shit and to do things.
You need to incentivize people to actually have a stake in their societies and communities.
Not everything can be run by the government.
Not everything should be run from people at 30,000 feet.
People closer to decisions generally make them better. That's why people that own
real estate care more about a community than people who rent. And the people that only care
about it if they live in the community, some of them might own a bunch of it and might care a
little bit, but they don't care that much
because their kids aren't in the schools. It's not like they're using the airport or the infrastructure.
They care about it only in the sense of an investment. Real estate may go up even if the
town goes to shit. So my problem with when you start running everything by the government is a lot of it's inefficient.
You don't get less inequality. You actually historically get more.
But that doesn't mean it's not understandable.
It's completely understandable why people want to throw people like Bezos into a furnace.
Because of the way he's behaving.
You can't behave like this.
In the hamlet, you're supposed to just eat fish and potatoes.
You're not supposed to eat a melon
that's shipped in from Japan.
Why are you shipping a melon in from Japan?
There's farms on that island.
You eat the corn.
Why do you have to ship a melon in from Japan? And then there's an on that island you eat the corn Why do you have to ship a melon in for a trip? And then there's an article that this melon is a million dollars
And it's being eaten in the hampton
People are reading this
They're reading this on their phone in a tent
There's people in a tent There's people in a tent
Watching people negotiate real estate deals on their phone
I'm telling you homeless people iPhones watch this show. They certainly watch owning Manhattan or selling sensor Any of this other dumb shit there are people right now in a tent
watching people negotiate high value real estate transactions while they live in a tent. There's people
watching the Kardashians flying around on private chats to have little arguments
with each other in stores they own in a tent. They're watching this in a tent. There's couples
living in tents. There are people living in vans. They're doing well. People living in
vans are doing good. So my point is that like I understand where this rage is coming from.
It doesn't go to a productive place. It rarely does. But I understand where it
comes from. It's absolutely natural. We have destroyed human beings in this country. We've
destroyed them. And then you have all the types that come out and just start talking
about opportunity and it's all around you. It's all around you. Stop. Just seize that.
Grab that. And it all comes down to drop shipping and crypto. It's all fraud and. It's all around you. Stop just seize that grab at and
It all comes under drop shipping and crypto. It's all fraud and the scam the criminals. It's all it's just being a scam artist
Well, you've actually got to optimize for like no no, no, you're a criminal that's okay, that's fine go get yours
But you're a criminal
You're just telling people to be a criminal.
That's not new.
Well, you actually have to optimize for like,
yeah, yeah, you're a criminal.
That's okay.
You've learned some online criminal conduct.
Congrats.
It's fine.
You don't have any talent.
It's not unique.
You're a criminal.
And that's fine.
That's always been an important part of our economy is a
institutionalized criminality. That's what it is. All these like alpha bro influencer types that
are telling you how much money is to be made in the world it's like you know there it's not there's
you're gonna work on a boat. You're gonna work on a boat.
You're gonna work on a boat. Can you get Tiesto's The Business copyright free?
Is that possible?
I kind of know him.
Maybe I'll just tweet at him and go, don't sue me.
But I think someone sues on behalf of him.
You're gonna work on a boat and it's actually a good life.
Let's see if we can play it.
Okay, no copyright remix.
You're gonna work on a boat.
Yeah.
You're just gonna be on a boat. And it's going to be going fast and you're just going
to be sitting there and you'll be looking at the horizon.
All right, we're going to get scammed.
They'll kill us.
But that's all you need out there.
That's all you need is to work on a boat.
Don't don't don't get Don't get upset about this either.
Literally the first thing anyone should do
is listen to the show right now,
is investigate opportunities to go seasonally work on a boat.
Do charters.
You stay in shape, you have sex, you look good.
It's a hard long-term plan.
So you're gonna have to have the wherewithal around 45.
It's a tough thing to turn 50.
At 46 years old, you're gonna be the old gal on the boat.
You're gonna have to have the strength.
It's very hard to grow old in that lifestyle. You're gonna have the
strength to walk to the bow because everybody else is going to be asleep and
you're going to have to walk to the... What's the back? Is it the bow or the stern? What is it? You know, you don't know.
There's absolutely no way you know.
The stern.
You can walk to the stern.
And you're gonna hear it like,
like you know,
and you're just gonna think about how fun it was to dance and get down a bit.
And you're going to get up on a stern.
And you're going to and you're going to be really drunk.
And you're going to drown yourself.
You're going to jump off the boat and you're going to drown and they're not gonna find your body.
You're just gonna be a legend. It's a watery grave.
You're gonna have to have the... you're gonna do it 48 years old.
48 or 49.
And you're gonna walk to... and you just go tonight's the night.
But if you're 20 and you're listening to this,
it's a good, you know, you can make it to 50.
It's good 30 years on that boat.
And then you just drown yourself when you're 50 years old,
because it's hard to get old in that life.
So you have to drown yourself.
You have to drown yourself at the end.
After you've danced and sang
and hooked up with different people on boats,
at 50 years old, you have to walk to the back of the boat,
the stern, we found out, and you have to drown yourself.
And give your body to the sea.
You have to drown yourself after this.
But it's gonna be 30 years of that song
that, let's get down to business.
And you're gonna hear that.
There's gonna be a moment when you first jump
into the water that, and you see the boat,
and it keeps going.
Hopefully they don't catch you.
That's really demoralizing. If they catch you and find you, they bring you back on the boat and it keeps going. Hopefully they don't catch you. That's really demoralizing.
If they catch you and find you,
they bring you back on the boat and you're just like wet.
You have to explain to them,
you're like, well, I'm getting older.
And I just thought I was gonna drown my,
they're like, are you trying to drown,
are you just drunk or are you trying to drown yourself?
I'm actually trying to drown myself.
They go, why?
You go, well, I'm getting older
and it's hard to get old in this life.
And, and the people in the boat are going to be like, Oh my God, no.
But that's why you have to do this quietly because then they're going to make all these horrible arguments for you to live.
They'd be like, no, but like,
but like you're so much fun.
You're like, don't drown yourself.
You're so much fun.
Like, remember like, remember last week when we were at the bar and like John fell and
it was so fun.
And you go, yeah, I can't do that anymore.
I can't do this.
You'll get it when you get to my age.
I just wanna drown myself.
I'm trying to drown myself.
So hopefully they don't find you.
And when you're in the water,
you're going to realize
that you're actually going through with it.
And there's gonna be a moment
where your fight or flight kicks in,
you're gonna start to swim
towards the boat, but you can't.
You can't, hopefully a current prevents you.
Because you gotta do it.
You know what I mean?
So you're gonna be in the water,
and then there's a fight, you try to swim for a little bit,
then you start to laugh, there's a moment where you go,
ha ha, what, well, the sea is powerful. And then you're gonna float for a little bit, then you start to laugh. There's a moment where you go, ha ha, what? Well, the sea is powerful.
And then you're gonna float for a little bit, like an angel.
You're gonna lay on your back,
and you're actually gonna float like an angel in the water.
And the boat now is kind of almost out of view.
You still see the lights, it's not quite out of view.
And you realize that it's set.
You realize that it's set.
It's all over with the crying now.
And the water's not even that rough. You realize you'll probably, you know, the carnus, you know, but then you realize
they're sharks. And you realize that you feel something just kind of nip. You don't know what
it is at first. and then you feel,
it's probably a tiger shark, they're very aggressive, and it grabs you and it begins to
pull you under and you realize in that moment it's over now. You're being eaten by a shark
in the Bahamas because you jumped off a boat.
Bahamas because you jumped off a boat. And, and there's a split second where you go, oh really?
Really?
I was trying to drown myself.
But it happens so quickly that you can't really put two and two together.
And then life just flashes before your eyes.
You remember being young, you remember the song The Business, you remember dancing at
all the different bars, you remember the beautiful sunsets and the beautiful sunrises, you remember
the hard days and the bad days, you remember the good and the bad of it all.
And as the shark rips you limb from limb, And as the shark rips you limb from limb,
I mean viciously rips you limb from limb.
I mean rip, they'll never find you.
You'll actually just be food for the sea,
the thing that you've spent your life on.
You know what I mean?
And the shark's gonna rip you up,
and you're gonna remember, you're gonna remember
this all started because I heard a podcast
Fourth of July weekend where this guy told me
To work on a boat and you're gonna say and I and I and I don't regret it
Even as a shark
Rips you and you're pretty sure you're in two like your head's still kind of working
But you're pretty sure you don't have a lower body. And you go, I, I, and you'll thank me.
Even then you'll go, thank God I heard that podcast. I had a great life.
Yes, I'm 50 years old and being eaten by a shark in the Bahamas.
Listen.
It's gonna be a great, you're gonna say thank you. Thank God I heard that and thank God I spent my life working on a boat it was one of the last jobs and when I got to
the age I did exactly what that guy in the podcast said I said walk to the
stern and drown yourself when you age out because there's no you haven't
saved any of your money why would you just coke and booze let's get down to
booze you don't have a little house nothing you thought was gonna happen I have a little cottage in New England no you won't drown
yourself at the end and a shark will eat you smart if you slit your ankle and you
bleed out in the ocean you're actually smart and you just slit your ankle a
little bit it's bleeding you jump in the and you just chill until they come.
I'm telling you right now this is the best advice you'll ever get in your life.
And if you don't listen to it fine but there's someone out there that's going to listen to this. I'll be dead long dead by the time you're getting eaten. But if you, right now, go work on a boat every summer and a lot of the winter,
and you spend 30 years from 20 years old right now, drop out of college, you're an idiot.
You go and you work on this boat and you enjoy yourself. You're probably not gonna have kids or anything.
It doesn't matter. You have a great life. And one night after a particularly nice day
on that boat, and I can't tell you exactly when,
you walk to the back and you slit your ankle
so you bleed out.
And you jump in the ocean in the middle of the night
and sharks eat you.
That is, for an American, right now, best case.
Best case.
And people will talk about that like that.
Years down the line, people will say
how successful you actually were.
You go, your aunt did it right.
Your aunt did it right.
She worked on a boat for 30 years sunrise sunset
some of the most beautiful places in the world and then at 49 years old she jumped off the stern and
sharks ate her
She did it right you're gonna be saying that in a prison you'll be in a prison with your whole family
You go your aunt did it right I?
Stayed here, and I talked about immigrants,
we're Muslims and now I'm in a prison.
And AOC is coming.
Your aunt did it right.
She got on a boat when she was young and she stayed there
until she literally fed herself to a shark.
That's the best case right now for the American middle class
is that you work on a boat and you're eaten by sharks. It's beautiful.
It's a magical moment. Magical moment. So stop with the Mamdani. Just go get
eaten by a shark on the boat
Stop with this mom though. I want everybody's money go to the stern
Go to the stern and jump off and cut yourself first so they know where you are
Cut yourself so the fish know where you are
See you next week