The Uneducated PT Podcast - Ep.65 - Chloe Shortman The Shy Girl

Episode Date: March 7, 2025

Chloe is a fitness coach who shares her journey and expertise on her Instagram account, @trainwitharcadia.She focuses on fitness and productivity, offering insights and tips to help her audience achieve their health and wellness goals.​ In our recent podcast episode, we had the pleasure of speaking with Chloe about her approach to fitness and how she integrates productivity strategies into her routines.We discussed her background, the challenges she has overcome, and the methods she employs to maintain a balanced and effective lifestyle.​ For more information and to connect with Chloe, visit her Instagram profile: @trainwitharcadia.

Hello and welcome to the uneducated PT podcast with me, your host, Carlo Rourke. The goal of this podcast is to bring on interest and knowledgeable people from all walks of life, learn a little something from each conversation and for you, the listener, just learn something from each episode. So don't forget to subscribe to the channel, press the box below, show some support and I'll see you on the next episode. Chloe, can you start by telling the listeners a little bit about how you entered the fitness industry, how you started off your fitness journey in general, actually,

and then a little bit about what you do today? yeah sure so I started off years and years ago so I used to GBI synchronized swimming so I competed at that kind of like national and then international level and then kind of after that took a few years off getting to groups with kind of what I was doing with my own fitness I guess outside of the pool and then I started going into more gym related weight training resistance related type training and then eventually I got into kind of coaching or online coaching and kind of where I am now. Did you have an identity crisis like most people after they leave sports? Oh yes. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. A hard identity crisis. I think it's so weird.

I think when you finish elite sport or sport of any kind, like it's your whole personality. Like you're waking up super early. You're training. You're going to school. Like I used to have it at school where everyone would like go to competitions and they like write good luck all over the whiteboards and like put stuff in my desk and on my lockers and stuff. Like it was so cool. And then you were just like, oh, you're just normal again.

And it's like, ah, okay, I don't want to be normal. Um, what do I do next? And that's where you get that like identity shift and like, what now, I think. Was it was intense than few years? I'm not sure if it was intense, but I just felt a little bit lost. Like, I think my, I just felt like I didn't have much of a purpose. And I think when you've gone from being so driven towards like a set purpose, like, you know if you're competing you've got three competitions in a year yeah a bc that's what you work towards and then you have a break and then you go again and it's like when you don't have that structure it's kind of like right well what do i do now what am i working towards and i think when you don't have a purpose or something you're working towards it can make things feel a little bit just

like you're floating you just got no real like drive um and again i think if you're someone that's had that before and then you lose it it's a bit like yeah, what do I do now? Where do I put my energy towards now? Where do I put my energy? And if you're a highly, sort of highly energized person like I am, you know, you've got a lot of energy

and then I think sometimes that can go internally and I don't always think that's the best thing. I think if you're active or hyperactive or you just got a lot of energy to give, you need to exert it on something positive or purposeful because otherwise I think you start looking for problems where they don't exist and that causes more problems. That makes sense.

Do you feel like you've found that now in regards to running your own business? Oh yeah. My brain doesn't switch off. But it's, it's, I was thinking about this weirdly earlier because I was thinking, I, everything, everywhere that my thoughts go, it's with purpose. Like it's like, how can I help this person or how could I be better at this? Instead of just being like, oh, you know, I don't know what to do or, or, or there's always something I'm working towards.

I think that's what I like. It's like you're always aiming for something. Yeah. I remember listening to a podcast before and someone was talking about how high level athletes always end up doing well going into entrepreneurial spaces because one thing that they're, you know, when you've done high level sport,

you're not afraid to throw yourself into the deep end of things, literally for you. Yeah. You're not afraid of failing and then going again because that happens all the time where you might lose a race or you might miss a lift or whatever it is. So you kind of have a little bit of resilience and you kind of back yourself more than like someone who hasn't played sport before or hasn't competed in sport before. They might not know what it feels like to put themselves in that uncomfortable position and kind of go for things. Does that make sense? Yeah.

Completely. I think resilience is probably my biggest superpower, like genuinely, because I don't think, and this is not me putting myself down, but I don't think I'm like anything crazy special. Like, I don't think I'm anything mad different to anybody else. I just think I have a really high tolerance for just like getting knocked down and standing back up again. And I do think a lot of that has come from sport. You know, I mean, high end sport is brutal. Yeah. It's amazing, but like mentally it's so tough. And it's like, yeah, I did well and I got to a high level. But there were so many knockbacks, there's so many kickbacks. There's so many days where you're just like, God, this has taken everything out of me. But then you get up and you go again the next day. Yeah.

And I think that's what creates momentum. Yeah. Yeah. And that's almost the same in business. It's like you're going to have knocks. You're going to have days where things don't go well or, but you just get up and you go again and you try to figure out. the next time how to do it better. Yeah.

And I do think that's something I underestimated in business. If I'm honest, I'm a very like, best case scenario, like positivity kind of person. And then I got into business and it was like a whole reality check.

Yeah. It's like a good thing as well because it's like, if you know, if you knew how hard it was going to be, you probably wouldn't have been like, I'll probably do something else. No.

Yeah. I'll probably get a job from someone else. Yeah. I'd have probably stayed what I was doing like, I had a nice, I had a good job. Like, I was, I was happy in what I was doing. Like, I was just in corporate and like, you know, very comfortable, very relaxed. Probably would have.

Probably, I don't know, but I don't think I would have. But yeah, it's something you look back on and you're like, wow, I underestimated what that was going to be. Yeah, but it's part, it's almost part of your DNA. So you enjoy that even if it's a struggle. Yeah. And I think now as well, it's like the person who I am now, I wasn't two years ago. Yeah. And that sounds so like.

cliche and like I wasn't who I was but genuinely. So it's like I wouldn't have even dreamed of doing a podcast or be confident about this kind of thing and now it's just like oh yeah. So I'm going to quote a few things that you've said. So you've got you've got already running ahead of yourself. So you said which I really really enjoyed a row confidence comes from doing things that scared a shit out of you. So I was going to ask you to give a few examples of times in your life where you took action even though you were scared. And I suppose like even doing a a podcast like this because a lot of people will be afraid to talk on a mic and there'll be so much in their head thinking about oh my god what if I say something wrong and people are listening to me and

stuff like that but like you were like yeah book it in let's go well yeah let's go tomorrow and I think that that kind of confidence only comes from continuously doing things that scare you yeah yeah I think the first thing to say about that is I do love to talk so I think like when someone's like oh here's a platform join a chat it's like oh yeah love that um I think when you say saying like about the whole the confidence situation. I think I created that real because I think I don't know, there's a lot of stuff that I've done that I think I've taken myself out of my comfort zone for and for example, start my Instagram, start my fitness Instagram. To now people probably look at it and they think, oh, you know, she's got a couple of thousand followers, like she's confident,

she's posting all the time. Now two, three years ago, I remember buying a tripod, take it into the gym four or five times before I even took it out of my bag. Yeah. Like I had people come over and talk to me and I literally just like wanted to leave. I was so uncomfortable. Starting my fitness Instagram, I blocked every single person I could find from the gym. So that no one in my gym knew my page. No, like none of the PTs, no one in there because I was so terrified that someone might find

it, which seems stupid because you want people on Instagram to find it. your page, right? Yeah. Well, it makes perfect sense because it's fair of judgment, right? Yeah, fear of a completely fear of judgment. And, you know, I had the page for three months before I even posted on it. Yeah. But I think it's, it's almost like with me, it's like, if something terrifies me, I'll give myself a date. Like, I was terrified to quit my corporate job and go into business. But gave myself a date, I was like, this is what I'm going to do it. And then I have a time period where I'm like leading up to like convincing myself that I'm going to do it. I tell people I'm going to do it. Then other people ask me, oh, when are you doing that?

And I'm like, oh, this day. And then it seems less scary then. Does it does the anxiety that filled off day? Yeah. And it makes you, but it makes you take action. Yeah. Because I think your brain like, or definitely my brain works towards solutions. So if I give it something and I'm like, this is what you're doing on this day, it will like work around to make a solution for that. Did you find that? Because you went, you blew up, because I like knew your new your page before you went kind of viral.

Did you find that when you went viral that you had that like fear of judgment of people watching your stuff? Not really because I had been on social media for like five years before I blew up. So I was, but I did have that. I did. I 100% had that experience when I started. Yeah. I was, you know, running boot camps and doing personal.

training for like three or four years before I transitioned online in 2019 and when I started like writing up fucking blogs on you know how to track of calories and this and slimming world and all that and all my friends are my old clients were like why is he why is he doing this why is he talking on cover why is he not in the gym because they didn't understand it yet like it wasn't like before COVID when everything kind of like blew up with the online scene and like they were like they were just confused about what I was doing and I knew that there was people kind of almost not judge me but kind of like smirking and

like what's what's he kind of doing then and I kind of just had to ride that wave and then eventually it was like oh this is just what Carl does now and you know by the time it came around where I did go kind of viral I had already done the repetition so many times that you know I was comfortable with it

but I also wasn't I also wasn't that comfortable with that amount of eyes on me I think I got to a stage where like I had a decent following I had good engagement with it and I was kind of used to my audience and I was actually, I got to the stage where I like I wanted to, you know, I always wanted to blow up and then

you know, before, just before I did it was so funny that I said to myself as like, oh, I actually don't want that because you get, it's not like the... So your opinions. Yeah, it's not like the quality of your audience gets better. It actually gets worse because you have people who know

you and trust you and because you show up every day for them but then you just get this big jump of people who they're a lot of them aren't there to, you know, be supportive to your business or to your page or just there to eyeball and whatever he makes mistakes. Yeah, just watch essentially. And if it's something that they don't agree with, straight in with a smirky comment and stuff like that. So like, now I'm very much like, very conscious of the last thing that I want this fame kind of thing.

So I've gone more, it's gone to, even though I do, I still put out a couple of videos, I've gone for a more style of writing because I want. on my face to be less shown and more just kind of do the creative process. Because I do love content creation. The creative. Yeah. I love the creativity of it. So yeah, that was kind of the, the, what happened to me, essentially.

Yeah. I so agree with that because I think I can't remember whether I read it or listened to it in a podcast. And it was saying like the reason why in this generation so many people's mental health is so bad. It's because we actually were never meant to have like biologically. We were never meant to have this many. eyes on us. Never meant to have this many opinions. Never meant to take on board this many people socially. So it's like if your platform gives you 100,000 people's opinions, it's like, whoa. That's too much for our brains. And it's the same d'other way as well. It's like, like the amount

of information that we're taking on at any given moment. It's like, all right, like put your phone down, have a break, go outside and go for a walk or something. Yeah. I find this all the time. I've got so more aware of this now and I have got better but I'm still not perfect but it's like I really struggled you know when you go on Instagram and it's like you need to do this now and obviously is everyone using like hooks and trying to get people to watch their content and it's marketing strategy but sometimes you just go on and you just think oh my goodness like I'm behind or like I need to do something immediately yeah and it's just so overwhelming I think a lot of people struggle with that there is well switch off no it's really it's really it's really

it's really difficult and like it's it's it's like it's setting yourself boundaries and i'm the worst person in the world that's setting myself boundaries i'm like i'll have my phone on me the minute i wake up on it the minute i go to sleep on it and i'm like like i i know i should do better and i still struggle to do better yeah i have days where i'm really good and i'm like yeah i'm really good today and then i have other days where i'll do something but then afterwards it's funny because i've started to kind of like check myself and i'll really notice the difference in like like my mental state to like whether I, for example, if I scroll right until the point I go to bed, my mental state when I go to bed is just exhausted. If I take the hour off before, even if it's

like watching TV or chatting to someone, the difference is huge. Huge. And that is, it's setting boundaries and you notice the, you notice the impact of that. And I think for a while I did that really well. And then I started to kind of slip on it. And then I, yeah, I definitely notice. It's all there's little small decisions throughout the day that really impact you. But you have to treat yourself like you have to treat yourself like you are the business because you are the business. And if you're in a business, like, you know, you need to do all them simple little things so you're not absolutely burnt out or.

Burn out. Well, I don't know if you've had this like horrific cold that seems to have come from like, I don't know, mid-February time. But I got wiped out. I never get ill. It's like my thing that I don't get ill. And I literally, I was so ill. and it was such a weird learning curve

because I was like, if you don't sit and watch TV all day and do nothing, you actually are doing detriment to your business because you cannot get up tomorrow and help people. And it was such a weird, like, I'm not, I'm not like that, you know, I'm always sort of on the go. Yeah, but isn't that, isn't that, I don't know if it is, I was going to say,

isn't it like a big issue if you can't take a day for yourself or like just sit with yourself? but at the same time and I don't know it's like because I know like people are designed different

I know there's some people who just sit on a beach all day and all week and all month and they'll be completely happy and then there's other people who just they need to be doing something they need to be building something

they need to feel productive so I know like we have different personality types but like I think definitely with like social media side of things and especially if you're working online you feel like you can never switch off and that's probably an issue yeah I think it's weird

for me, like I don't know if you have this, but like, it's when I'm with people, I'm fine. When I'm with somebody else, like, if I'm with my mates or anything, I'm off and switched off. But if I'm by myself, I think that's when those little bad habits start to creep in because you, oh, I just could, like, check something or I just could reply to this person.

And it's just about constantly, like, going back over your boundaries and being like, am I actually speaking to them? It's hard. That's why I think even, like, sport is, like, if you can find even a sport, that you can play even just like recreationally like it complete you're completely engaged in what you're doing and I think like when I was I only I retired from football last year and I really noticed the difference even in my mental health to the fact that like when I was playing football

still you know even if it was just amateur it was like maybe one two three hours a week where like I'm completely engaged with what I'm doing on outside and I'm completely present I can't be near my phone because I'm on on the pitch I'm interacting with other people and then I can go home and I feel 10 times better and actually be able to work and be productive versus not doing anything all day and then being able to like half watch telly, half scroll through emails,

half kind of be on the laptop typing. Yeah. It's like that full present like mode, isn't it? Yeah. That you have to switch on. But I do think it's, yeah, it's difficult to switch in and out of it. I do agree.

Yeah. Yeah. I think if you're able to just set up things throughout the day that force you to be off your phone rather than just trying to wheelpower your way through it, like, all right, I'm going for a walk with my friend today. That's, you know, going to be something where I'm reducing my screen time or whatever, whatever the case may be.

I wanted to ask you a question, though, because your bio says, shy girl to that gym girl, yeah? Yeah. But you don't, like, is that something that you struggled with when you were younger being shy? Because I don't perceive you as someone who is shy, but obviously that's because of the work that you've probably done. So this is really funny because it's actually quite a, I think, a misconception about me. I am what I would describe, I'm a bit of a conundrum, like I would describe myself as a very

introverted extrovert. So I'm a massive extrovert. Like I love chatting to people. I'm very friendly. Like, you know, if you came up to me and you're just like, hey, and started a conversation, like happy days, I'll sit and chat to you for half an hour. But there's certain things which really make me quite sort of go in my shell, quite shy. And I think I've done so much work over the last since owning a business and being on social media, so much work to get more confident. And I think going from a place where I was so nervous and shy and didn't feel comfortable to now feeling how I do, I think that's the journey that I want to take people on. So I guess like a past version of me to kind of like a current version of me is that

sort of like shy girl to how you're feeling like that girl, you know? was the biggest mental shifts that had you going from someone who was quite shy and anxious to someone who was a lot more confident? What do you think has changed? How has that changed you? What do you mean? How has that shift changed me? Yeah.

Or no, what created that shift? I went through like a really big breakup. So I think I was like with someone at the time and then like I split up from that person and I literally had like a full identity just reshift. I think there's like big moments in your life that kind of like shape you to that next chapter

or kind of force you up that next level. And I think for me that was one of them and I was just like, right, that's it. I'm going to do this. I'm going to start a business. I'm going to quit my job and I'm just going to go for it. Would you say when you were in that relationship, you were quite a shy and anxious person?

Certainly at points. Yeah. Certainly at points. But I do largely think a lot of that confidence has come from. again kind of what I said earlier like doing the things that scare you or just doing the thing that you think you can't do and I think confidence comes from that kind of action and momentum because you look back and you're like oh I can you know yeah well would you say that you were kind of dependent on the relationship and and then going out and being on your own and and

chasing after kind of goals and aspirations that's helped yeah I think I think I put a lot of like my self-worth into that relationship and how that relationship made me feel. And that was like completely on me, right? But I think when I came out of that, I was like, I have to be the person that tells myself I've got value. I have to be the person that drives myself forward. I have to be the person that looks after me.

And I think it was in all of that that I kind of actually, like it sounds so cliche, but like you sort of find love for yourself instead of looking for it from external places. Yeah, which means that you're always under the control of of someone else basically whether they want you or not or whether they value or you not. And that's not a good place to be.

No. And do you know what's funny is like I see it so often, even with people that I'm working with. And it's like, you know, I had a chat with the client the other day and she was like, I just feel really awful this week. And I kind of lent into it and asked her what she'd been doing and she'd been going on loads dating apps. And I was like, you're looking for, you don't feel good about yourself.

You're looking for that external validation from somebody else. I was like that is never going to make you happy and actually it's going to make you worse because they're going to pick you up and then when they want to drop you, they can drop you and then you're back in square one if not a couple of steps back. It makes sense.

You're literally just swiping for that dopamine hit. Dopamine. Day ticks me, day ticks me, day ticks me, day ticks me, and a lot of times you don't even go on the day anyway, it's literally just for that quick release of it. But also, if you're someone that is self-conscious or doesn't like the way they look, And then you're using an app, which is purely focused on validation from photos or like what you look like in a picture.

You're just causing yourself a multitude of problems, honestly. That's not a good place to be. No. So do you think, do you think being in the gym has helped you with that? You know, finding compassion for yourself, self-worthing yourself and not looking for it in external validation of other people? Yeah, massively. Yeah. Massively.

I think a lot of it has been with the. confidence side of things like you know and I think the more you say you're filming the gym say there's like 30 people in the gym and I get out my tripod there has to be a certain level of me that's like I actually do not care about what people think about me right now to get that tripod out and the more times you do it if you do it with there's five people in there you're getting a bit confidence 10 people in there you gain a bit of confidence and it sounds so minor but I think it's little things like that that do build you up and then extend to other areas that you're like well I did that, that little small thing.

So why don't I do a little bigger thing and then a bigger thing and then a bigger thing? And it snowballs. That makes perfect sense. And what about, you know, so obviously being in the gym has helped with your confidence. But how has it impacted your confidence outside of the gym? In what ways? So I wouldn't necessarily say the gym in itself maybe has done this. But I think being on social media has massively helped me because I think it was kind of what you were saying earlier when you.

you were like before you blew up and kind of people and your friends and your social group was like watching what you were doing and I used to get really nervous when I would have someone that I knew follow me and then I'd see their name in my stories or like in my interactions and I've been like oh my goodness that person just saw that like what did I say what did I say and um and I'm quite I would say like sometimes I've definitely like got a bit less unhinged and unfiltered but um at the start I was very just like unhinged and unfiltered and let me be. say what I think everyone's going to enjoy rather than what I think kind of thing. What I think, yeah. So I think seeing more people and more people coming onto your page

and more people in and also, right, people that don't think I see you in my story views. I see you in my story views. I know who you are. Do you not? I mean, people that shouldn't be stalking my page, stalking my page and I'm like, mm-hmm. But I think when you have that and you have social media and you put yourself out there all the time, you're showing up good day. bad days like before I was a content creator I didn't realize when you have an awful day like really bad you still have to show up on social media yeah because that's what people are seeing from you that's the kind of you know you yeah consistency you're running a business you have to put you know your like your

business over your your kind of own feelings sometimes yeah and I think again it's it's all of those things that I think have built up that wider picture of just like who I am in the gym, who I am outside the gym. It all kind of feeds it. It's like you just said, it's like feeling the fair in doing anyway, the fear of judgment, fear of, you know, what will people say? But regardless of them uncomfortable feelings, you still showed up and did the thing anyway.

And that's the best way to get confidence is to take action on things that scare you. Yeah. And I also think it's like the more I've done this and the more I've thought about it, like, I don't want to get to, like, the biggest thing I hate, right? And the word potential, like when someone says to you, like, oh, you got so much potential, like, no, I don't want potential. I want to, I want to win. Or like, I want to do the thing. Like, I don't want someone to say she could have, but she didn't. I want someone to be like, she did. Yeah. So it's like, with everything, I think it's like always wanting to stop procrastinating, stop being scared of that

thing and taking actions that help you do it, as opposed to being like, well, she could have done that, but, you know, living with the regret then of not doing what you want to do because of fear of judgment. Or other people's opinions or something that's holding you back, like, whatever it is. That it scares me more to not reach my potential than other people's opinions. Yes, that makes more. That makes a lot of sense. I wanted to talk to, I wanted to go into a gym advice as well for anyone who might be listening who might be starting off their health and fitness journey and want a little bit of advice off you. So what are some of the common mistakes that you see in the gym that you think hold, hold people back or holds back real progress? Maybe talk a little bit about

mistakes that you used to make or things that you do now that really works well or works well for your clients that you didn't do before. So I would say the biggest thing, I think it's quite common. So I'm, my niche is like women predominantly like female fat loss. Yeah. Also like Jim anxiety and new starters, that kind of thing. The biggest, I think, like not problem, but the common thing that I see is people rush, right? So they wake up, they have something to push them. They've seen themselves in a photo or they've spoken to someone and they've gone to a family event and someone's been like, oh, you've put on a bit of weight, whatever it is.

It's got them in a bad head space. They've gone, right, that's it. I'm changing my whole life. I'm going to the gym, I'm starting tomorrow. They wake up, they go and put themselves in a situation that they are so uncomfortable with. Like, if they are someone that's not confident in the gym, they go in peak time and try and do like a full session. And then they leave and they're like, that was the worst thing that has ever possibly happened to me. I'm never doing that again.

That place is insane. I'm never going back. Yeah. Like, I hated that so much. And I'm like, look, if you literally just went in, got on a treadmill for half an hour and like, I know people repeat that. it's like get on a treadmill and like da-da-da-da-da-da but genuinely like just go and get comfortable in the environment you don't have to do it immediately like I think and it leads into everything else but like think about it social media quick hit dopamine scrolling on dating apps quick hit dopamine

like you know everything like even uber eats and takeaways and things like that straight away to your door I can have it now yeah it's people try and do that with fitness and it's like you know I've never done this before I'm not confident I'm want it now. And it just, it doesn't work effectively that way. I think people need to take like a slower approach where they're like, okay, cool. This is what I want to achieve. Step back three months from that, where do I need to be? Three months from that, where do I need to be? If you want to get into the gym and you want a routine, start with actually just going in there and just like being in there and just walking on a treadmill or doing an exercise. Chloe, I'm your client and I'm like, but Chloe, please, I just want to

lose the weight now. I want to get the results now. What do I need to? deal. You want to get the results right now and you're impatient. Yeah. So how do we keep someone, how do we, so someone who doesn't have, doesn't have that patience. It's just, you know, like you said, that they, they've had some sort of a moment where they're like, oh shit, something needs to change now. And so, you know, they want drastic change right now and they're prepared to do drastic action in order to achieve them results. To achieve something. Yeah. So, like, do you have that conversation with them? So do you know what? Normally, so when people come on board with me, right, they do like

the whole onboarding form and, you know, I ask them, what do you think you can manage? What do you want to manage? And say, for example, if they're doing training with me, I say, right, how many sessions can you fit in in the week? Oh, I could do five. Brilliant. First conversation I have, cool, we're going to put in three. And they're like, what do you mean? But like, I said I can do five.

And I'm like, you've said you can do five now because you're motivated. You're coming in. You're excited. you want the goals right now. That's like idealism. That's amazing. I love that. Go for it.

Realism is you can fit in three. And like I would rather fit in three this week. You smash it. You're like, yep, hit it done. Next week we'll do four. But if you can't hit, I would rather someone says, I've smashed three,

then I failed hitting five. Yes, that's amazing. Because the tweaking that mentality for them going forward, massive. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It makes sense. Like even if like you say, all right, you've set to,

they've set five they could have hit three they hit three sessions that week so it doesn't matter if they've hit they've hit three sessions regardless but because their expectation was they've to hit two but they actually hit three

like that's even, they're doing even better than they were doing before but if their expectation was oh no I set out to do five but I only did three oh now I'm failing and then that's kind of that demotivates them essentially

yeah and if it's that whole thing of like they're rushing it as well like if they hit that initial roadblock and it just feels too hard too quick they do just give up yeah yeah and also if you're if you're if you're starting off with small wins but they're hitting them small wins you know they're reinforcing the idea that they can do this so like you're you're getting wins very quickly very early which again is going to mean that they're more engaged to keep out this longer and the longer they keep out it the better results they're going to get it goes so much down to like self-belief of what people think they can achieve. And like nine times out of

10, like I've had people come on to me, you know, and they've, they've never used a gym before. And now all of a sudden they're in the gym like four or five times a week. And we're like, God, like, never would have thought that would have been me. But it's because we've done it over 12 months, not two weeks. Yes, that makes sense. That makes sense. In terms of training and advice, so lifting heavy weight and, you know, training for performance, what advice, give me, give me three pieces of a training advice you'd have for for your clients or for the newbie starting you know maybe three maybe some mistakes that they they make stop going for like 200 kg on the hip thrust don't need to if your form is rubbish you are just going to injure yourself as you so many people

like oh i've smashed this weight on the hip thrust i'm going to get a massive like massive ass no you're not you're going to get a back injury like tone it right down you can get so much glute progress from that exercise by doing it at lower weight massive conversake I see second thing is your tempo so many people especially if you're nervous you're bit anxious you're trying to exercise for it

for the first time really going fast on the exercises and just like slamming down the weights all the time just slow it right down take a hot sec would be the first two and the last one would be stop changing up your workouts

like every single week Is that a mistake? you see Mike did you used to make that mistake when you're younger? I think I was just looking for the next shiny thing all the time. Yeah. Like, which is even more prevalent now that you have social media and everyone showing different exercises all the time.

Yeah. And again, like I think there's so much with, if people want a quick fix, they look for a shiny thing to give them a quick fix. And it's like actually if your routine feels boring or it feels like you're repeating things over again, it's probably a sign that you've ticked it off.

You're consistent with it. and it's actually working if you give a chance. Yeah, so people see an exercise, I use this exercise and I grew my glutes three times over. So if you just do this exercise, you'll also grow your glutes. And then that happens to each exercise each week and then they realize why they haven't seen any progress.

Yeah. Yeah. But then they go on social media and someone's telling them to do something different. Yeah. And it's like for me, it's like if you are paying one person and you're paying a coach, listen to them over all of the noise that you're hearing on social media. Like, I think you just need to pick one thing that you're doing. Try that. Stick to it.

See if it works. If it doesn't, then go to the next thing. But having given it time to work first. Yeah. So, yeah, if you're changing your workouts every week, you're not going to make progress. And the whole point is, you know, it's less about the exercise and more about the fundamental principles of the train and making sure that the weights are going up every week, that you're getting more efficient that it's moving properly.

like you said, controlling the tempo, getting full range of motion, like quality over quantity of exercises. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. But it is hard because, again, like, you know, I actually met one of my clients yesterday

and we did like a workout together. And she was sort of speaking to me about stuff. She was like, gosh, like, there's so much to think about. And she was doing this, she was doing like RDRs. And she was just like, there's so much to think about all the time. And I was like, but it does get easier. Like, you know, I think it's just focusing. on a couple of things trying to do that as best you can and they're adding something else in

instead of trying to just overwhelm yourself with lots of different things. Yeah like the last thing you want to do is get someone who's fresh to the gym like everything's foreign to them and then you have written out like 10 exercises on a program and they're like oh my god how am I going to find all these things around the gym. Yeah and then they're just going and they're like do you know what I'm just leaving this is horrible. I think I think when when you've been training for so long because like anyone who's a coach has obviously been exercising or been in the gym for a long period of time. I think you forget what that feeling feels like for people

when they enter a gym. Yeah. Yeah. And I think as well like, I don't know, I think gym anxiety is so much more common than people think. Because I think even like, if, I mean, I've seen massive influencers that have millions of followers and then they'll post on their story like,

oh, went to a new gym and I got really anxious. and you're like, yeah, like it's not just, it's not just new starters. It can be people that are going back after a long time or, you know, it can be people that you think are super confident, but actually maybe they've had something happen in their life that's knocked them a bit or, you know, they're just feeling a bit vulnerable and they walk in like, oh. And so I think it's actually a lot more common than people think. And that's why I tackle it a lot in my content because it's something that I think

if you can get over that, it's massive. Yeah. And like, if I would get it as well, if I'm going on. to maybe somewhere where I haven't been before, maybe a class I haven't done before. Like I think it's, when we, we want to stick to familiarity. All right.

That's what feels safe and what we're looking for is safety. So when you're able to kind of stick to a gym where you feel comfortable, even going at the same time every day because you'll end up seeing the same people. And yeah, everything just feels like, because it only takes like one or two things to throw you off. And I know that I've had that with clients.

It's like, they'll go at three o'clock and they feel great every time and then they went at seven o'clock and it was busy and there was someone else on the machine that they usually use at that time and they threw them off and then they didn't finish the rest of their program they're like right I'm going so like it is it's it's familiar already like and that's why sometimes I even say to clients all right like for the first week just walk in there get to the door get to the treadmill just walk on the treadmill for half an hour and then leave because yeah all you're what you're doing is you're just getting yourself familiar with the with the environment yeah exactly yeah So much of like anxiety comes from just like unfamiliarity or not knowing. So it's like as you said they're like not knowing the people or not knowing what equipment's going to be free or you know not knowing the environment. And it's like all of those different things can feed into that whole like anxiousness feeling. But if you actually leave at that point. So if you're anxious and then something scares you or terrifies you and you run away from it, all that does is it repeats that like neuronal pathway that says this is dangerous.

this is scary, avoid. Whereas it's like even if you just go in and you just sit on a mat for 20 minutes and you leave, your brain goes, okay, I didn't die. Nothing really bad happened. So like next time when I get scared, it's like, I think I can do that again as opposed to only thinking that the only solution is like running away. Yes, that makes sense. If you avoid the thing that scares you, it gets bigger.

And then if you take action on it, it gets smaller. There was a great quote. I think it was, I can't remember where I heard from, but it was like, the antidote. to anxiety is action, not avoidance. And you know, you just don't want to avoid the thing that scares you. So even breaking it down and the small chunks where it is, get to the door, get to the treadmill, get to the first machine kind of thing. Yeah.

Even if it's like, do you know what? It's like, you know what David Lloyd's and stuff they have? Like the little coffee houses and stuff, it's going and get a coffee. Yeah. Like, don't even, just go and look at the gym or like go and ask someone to like walk you around it. It doesn't even have to be, you know, like running and do a massive workout straight away.

It's whatever's comfortable for you. drive around the building about people. It happened to me actually when I was younger. I remember I walked all the way up to a gym door of a place I hadn't been before. I got straight up to the door and I was, and I just turned around and walked straight back, you know? Yeah.

But like, again, it's kind of like with that three session, five session thing, it's like if you tell yourself, I'm just going to get there today and you do it, you take that from like a loss to a win because you're like, well, like, I got there. And it's like, you know, it's just managing, what your expectations are for you as opposed to being like well this person did this so that means I should do that too yeah well I think that's the big thing that you

you've touched on when you're when you're coaching people whether it's you know fitness or anything else it's it's managing expectations of what you think you should be doing versus realistically what what needs to be done for you to kind of move forward yeah yeah but I think it's natural like I think especially with what you said you know when people are so desperate and when they come to us for coaching it

it's from an emotive reason. Like it's because they're unhappy with the way things are. They don't want things to say the same. So to say to someone like, you know, there is a phase in period. There is a period where, you know, you are getting used to things. Sometimes that isn't enough for people because they're like, but I want to see results now. And it's like that's probably what's actually holding you back. Yeah, yeah.

That's exactly what's holding you back. Yeah. That whole like mentality of like, no, I want to start now or like yesterday is probably what is putting the pressure on you, which is. stopping you from taking a steps forward. And that's not just in fitness, in fitness, as well.

I think that's in life. Like, we do that in business, we do that in everything. It's like, I want the result now. Yes. You know,

it's just human nature. What do you think you've, from training people over the last couple of years and, like, coaching them and really getting to know your clients and known their struggles and, you know, knowing how to get the best out of them.

What do you think you've learned about people? I've learned a lot about people. I, genuinely like I actually think this is again this is a bit cliche but I genuinely think the biggest thing I've learned is like compassion for other people because I think so many times someone has said something to me or message me something and my immediate jerk reaction has been you know oh I've taken offence to that or like you know it's been some sort of like negative reaction to what they've messaged me and then it's come out in a few weeks that maybe you know there was something

else that was happening with them or, you know, like something, there was some other external circumstance which caused them to be like that. You know, I had someone a few months ago that was quite rude to me over Instagram and I was like, I'm trying to help you. Like, you've been really rude to me. Like, I don't really like that. And then I sort of spoke to her a few months down the line and she was like, I suffered with like really bad ADHD. And I was like, oh, I was like, okay, now it makes sense why you did what it did, what you did, like now it makes sense the way that you spoke to me or the way that you just kind of dropped off the face of the earth.

And then when she explains to me, I was like, oh my gosh, like, I need to be like, you know, way more compassionate towards, like, it's not always about you. It's not always about, I'm taking offense to that. Sometimes it's like, do you know what? Maybe they got something that they're dealing with, like, that's fine.

It's such an important aspect of coaching that, I think you only, you won't, only kind of you get you get more of it over time of dealing with different people because we all look at life through our own lens like our own experiences oh this is easy for me to do so therefore it should be easy for someone else to do or you know this is how I would behave so this is how everyone else should behave yeah these are my values so therefore these should probably be this person's values but then you start to you you just learn more about people from all different backgrounds and it just builds that empathy and it when you know

know when you can have empathy for other people, I think it's automatically going to make you a better coach. I think that is the fundamental of coaching is to have empathy for people because like what you might struggle with doesn't mean that they're going to struggle with that. And what they struggle with doesn't mean that you're going to struggle with that because you've had different backgrounds. You've been brought up differently.

Life has just treated you differently. So yeah, I think it's a really important aspect of coaching. Massively. What do you think you've learned? What do you think yours like your biggest takeaway? from coaching because you've been in the game a bit longer than me so

I think I think it would be quite similar to that is having compassion and have have an empathy and that's why I agree with it so much because like even like a lot of the stuff that like a lot of the clients that I worked with over the years are people who you know suffered with kind of binge eating and stuff like that and you know you start to realize that

a lot of the issues that they have it's not just like oh they're struggling with their weight they should you know count their calories you know get their steps Move more. Eat less. Yeah, they should do. They should do exactly what I do to stay healthy and fit.

Yeah. But without understanding. And then like a lot of the conversation, I remember having like very deep conversations with clients. And like you have to, you kind of have to tread carefully because you're not their therapist or you're not qualified to be a therapist. But they do.

Maybe you're the only one person that they can kind of offload on. And yeah. They would tell you stories about even their childhood, about different ways that they were brought up, you know, being introduced to weight watchers and stuff like that just because, you know, they were a little bit bigger as a kid. and they were bullied in school and then their mum would take them to wait watchers

which introduced like this kind of diet culture and shame and this led them to you know secretly and not eating in front of people in case they were slagged and then going home and then you know raiding the presses at night when nobody was looking and you know creating these poor relationships with with fields that you know is a big barrier for people you know being happy

and getting the results that they want and I was like I would never know any of that stuff if I didn't enter the realm of coaching. I'd probably just be like every other gobshite on social media saying, oh, he just needs to have more discipline or just have more willpower. And it's like, it's only when you actually talk to people and you understand their their life story where you actually create that empathy and compassion to, to be a better coach, I suppose.

Yeah. And I think that's where that whole like one to one or that whole personalised element comes in. because you can't just give someone exactly the same thing as someone else because it won't whether it works physically mentally mentally emotionally it's going to be completely different person to person yeah you can't like you can't just put 10,000 people on an app and expect them to get them to make progress yeah to make progress because a big a big aspect of it is like okay yes these people should probably get more steps in or lift some heavy weights or eat a high protein diet and you know drink some more water get to sleep early

And we know all the fundamental basics of, you know, physical health and how that replicates the other areas of your life. But it's like, until somebody knows that you care, they're not really going to take on that advice. Like unless I know that someone gives a shit about me, it doesn't matter what they say. It could be the best advice in the world. I'm still probably just going to ignore it because that person doesn't care about me or I don't relate to that person. Because it could be the other thing is like, oh, that person could have great advice. But I just don't relate to them. So it's very hard for me to take it.

take on that advice and incorporate it into my life. Yeah, 100%. I think coaching like coaching is so much more of a relationship than people understand. It's like the clients for me and my program that get the absolute best results is the ones that I can, like they have a good relationship with me and they relate to me and they take on my advice because they get me, I get them. That's the best. And that's why I think you have such a selection process to actually getting into that

coaching program because it's like fundamentally need to know. know that we actually get on before we do anything. And that's also relates back to why it's important to show up as yourself on social media. Like you said, like show up as your unfiltered self because that's actually what's going to draw in the right people for you and for them. So then they can actually get the result they want because they know who they know who they're getting when they get Chloe. Like they know who she's being herself online because she's comfortable to be herself

without judgment. So therefore when they get into the coaching process, like they already kind of know who you are, they know kind of, like, how you talk to them. And, and that just makes everything run smoother for them as well. Yeah. And I've had people as well, like, ask my friends, like, friends, like, friends, like, is she like that in person? Like, is she like the same? And I, like, yeah, like, she's unhinged and unfiltered. But it's like, you have to because I personally can, do you know this whole, like, fake it till you make it? Like, I can't fake being me. Like, I just, I just am me. You either like me or you don't like me. I prefer it if you liked me,

but if you don't like, it is what it is. But it's exactly that, because if you're showing up as a different person, there's only so long that you can keep that, like, persona up. And I think people see right through that so quickly. Yeah, when you put so many hours into talking online, like, eventually the real you is going to, it'll be too exhausting to fake being someone else. Yeah, yeah, you just won't be able to do it.

Won't be able to do it. But I think it's easier to, I think that's where, like, videos and just, like, talking on your stories and stuff, think that's where that gets across your real personality. Yeah. Because I think even in like captions or like photos, you're not still seeing that raw element of you. So I do try.

That's why a lot of like big influencers, the only thing you really see from them is pictures and then captions. They're probably stolen off someone else because they, they're probably terrified to show their real self. Their real self. But people are so, like, I think as well, like our world's become so PC and you can get canceled, and slated on and so much hate for saying the wrong thing,

that it's like, I think you get that like paralysis when you have more followers and have more opinions because it's like, you know, I've got more people watching, more people are going to tell me I'm wrong, more people going to say something they don't agree with. And it's like, you know, if you don't like my content, you don't like my message, just unfollow me. Like, honestly, it's fine.

Yeah. Please don't write comment. I don't need to see it. It's like good. Yeah. Okay. I was going to ask another question on the gym, but I wanted to go into,

these are called Chloe's Wisdom Round. Oh, God, okay. Yeah. Sure. All right. So, first question that I'm going to ask you, what's the best piece of advice

that you've ever received? Very difficult questions to think off the top of your head, but I'm going to back down. Okay. Best piece of advice, I think, I listen to a lot of podcasts, and I think I've got two,

I guess they're not really pieces of advice. They sort of are sort of on. two phrases and I think they like I live my life by these two phrases. Number one be a wolf not sheep because it's just like just don't follow whatever else is doing. What does that look like in your everyday life do you think? Taking action. Just not being scared to take action and also not doing other like not doing other things because someone else says to you this is what you should be doing. Doing it because you're like that's right for me.

That's my first one. second one is like new level new devil because i feel like every time you like level up or take that next step something is going to come and just like slap you in the face and you've just got to be set like every time you get a setback or a knockback it's like okay but what can i learn from this yeah and that sounds so easy to say but i have done that in my life with some horrific situations and it's actually got me so much further than just being like well that was really rubbish and like like that's it. I'm always like what can I learn or what can I get from that. Yeah. It also that phrase also reminds me of one that I always use. It's like there are no solutions only trade

off. So it's like you think that okay, you get to the next level or you get to this stage of business or whatever it is. Like once I get to that stage then everything, that's whatever. I'll be happy. Everything will figure itself out. But then there's just more problems. They're just, they might be better upgraded problems, but they probably come with more pressure or whatever it is. So like there's always going to be, you know, something. Yeah, something fires to put out or something like that. That's really good. If you could go back in time and give yourself one lesson, what would it be? One lesson, what would it be? Live in the now and don't worry about the future because I've spent so much time wasted,

worrying about what I thought life was going to look like or what I thought a certain situation was going to turn out as or, you know, what I think. thought was going to happen. None of it happened and I just wasted a load of time getting myself round around and spirals thinking, this is going to happen, this is going to happen, this is going to happen, catastrophizing and it never happened. And something completely different happened and it shoots off on a different path. So I think if I could go back, I would just be like, you only know right now, you don't know what's going to happen in the future. You only know right now. So just like obviously have half an eye on the future, but live with right now in mind instead of constantly worrying about what's coming next.

Is that kind of like having expectations for how you feel like your future was supposed to plan out? Yeah. Yeah. Or just being worried that maybe the trajectory that you're on right now is going to take you somewhere that you don't want to be or don't like. And it's like it just because you think a certain situation is going to play out in a certain way, it just doesn't mean it will in good and bad ways.

Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. It's like you can't predict it. So it's kind of like just trying to let go of control. Yeah. Yeah. Which is a difficult thing because that's scary. Yeah.

And I am a bit of, I wouldn't say I'm a control freak, but I like to be in control. Something I'm really working on is like taking a bit of a step back and just being like, what will be will be? But I like, I'm a bit of a micromanager. So that's hard for me. Yeah. They're all traits of people who have played high. levels for it, you know that? Yeah. But like, like control, micromancing. Yeah. Yeah. Um, what do you think is the key

to true happiness? I think is figuring out what it looks like for you. Because for someone else, true happiness is like, oh my gosh, I've got my own private jet and I'm flying to all these different countries. And like, true happiness for me is like sitting in my living room with like, my family around me, literally laugh until I can't breathe because, you know, we've, we've played picturenery and something silly happened. Like, it's figuring out what does happiness look like to you and then not let anyone else be like,

you should, your happiness should look like this or it should look like that, just being like, what am I comfortable with? And it goes back to the whole social media of constantly feeling like you're not doing well enough or you could be doing better or you could be doing something different.

It's like, figure out what happiness looks like to you and then just do everything you can to, like, drive yourself towards what makes you happy in yourself. That kind of leads on to my next question. because you've kind of touched on a little bit. But what does the perfect day look like for you? If you were to design your life. Because I always say to my clients is like,

we all want to set like real big grand goals. And that's absolutely fine. I think you should be ambitious. But also remember that like you could spend your whole life trying to chase a goal. And then to achieve and then to die. But like it's really important then to, you know, make a really successful life. And I think the best way to make a successful life is to have a successful day

because your days make up your life. So what would you say, what does the perfect day look like for you? Perfect day, honestly, probably just like seeing as many people as possible or like, you know, getting outside. Is this, here's my real question. Is it similar to how your days look like now? Interesting question. No, I think I could work. I'm constantly torn between like, you know, you work hard or, you know, you try and,

it's very difficult, I think, run a business. It's like, you know, you need to put in the work at some point. But then you also, you have this freedom that you're like, oh, well, like, I want to go out and get a coffee with a nan or like, I want to go and do this thing. And then it's like, but actually you have to sit in and do the work. Otherwise, you won't have a business that will let you go and get a coffee with your nap.

So I guess my perfect. It's the most difficult thing in the world. And you know what? I don't always know if there is a perfect balance or a perfect day or, or I think it's just like about taking perfect moments, building up as many perfect moments as you can in a day. Yeah. And I think balance can look like, okay, I'm going to do 12 hour graft on the laptop. And balance could look like,

okay, I'm not going to spend any day on the laptop at all here and go out and have a coffee with my nan or whatever it is. Yeah. Yeah. Or it's like, you know, this week I'm going to sit and just grind. And then next week I'm going to take a couple of days off or, you know, I'm going to go and do this thing afterwards. I think it's just like figuring out. what you're happy with and not constantly getting in a zone of like doing too much or too little. So I don't have to answer your question. No, that answers it perfectly. So here's a question for you then.

So what are you working towards what like what does what are you what are you just defined and that success? Oh, that's a very difficult question because going back to the athlete mentality like what success looks like to me is very different to what success might look like for someone else. I'm very hard on myself. Yeah, I read that when I was going through, when I was doing my show notes, I read that as well. What did you, what did you read that just people are, no, that you're hard on yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because I hold myself to high standards. Because I, because I want to. Like, but I think. Can that work to your detriment as well, though?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Sometimes I, I do think it. I was like, I wonder what it'd be nice to just be like, I don't know, just like have lower expectations for myself and like constantly hit them and be like, oh, this is amazing. Like I'm smashing it. But I think the reason I was thinking about this the other day, the reason why I love my life and what I do with the coaching so much is like every day there's a chance for me to show up in a way that's better. Like every day there's something I'm working towards. There's a purpose. And I think that gives me so much like energy. Yeah. Progress is important to. progress, yeah.

It's a value of yours. Yeah, massively. Looking for progress. I think for me, success would look like building out a really, like a big team of women that are supporting each other somewhere, just so as we can do things like meet up. And I think I've got a lot of online stuff at the minute, but I think in the future, I want it to be more hybrid type where, you know, we're meeting up. We're doing group events.

We're doing photoshoots and just helping to, because I think. think a lot of people struggle with loneliness, struggle with social media taking them away from real life connection a lot. So it sounds a bit silly because I do so much online and my business is an online coaching business. But I think moving into the future, I want to make it so it's like we connect online and then it goes more into hybrid real life. Yeah. And I'd completely agree with that because I, I've done the same myself and like I, I would never like, I'm not, I don't like talking about social media or online, like it's the devil because like it's provided a lot of great things in my life. And it's also provided a lot of great relationships in my life. Like there's a lot of

people that I met through online, whatever way that was. And then ended up meeting in person and ended up having really great friendships with them people. And that came like like that is more the benefits of online. Yeah. Yeah. And you can reach so many more people like we'd never be having a conversation. Do you know like and your paths would never meet. And I think there's so much positive about it if you can control it instead of letting it control you. Yeah, I think that's the big important word is that being able to kind of control or manage it as manager. But like you said, and it's also easier to them find people who have similar values or similar

ambitions to you, whereas if it's just kind of maybe people in your own town, it's like you might not be able to define that connection with people as much because there's less people, I mean, a form of parameter. I also think as well, like, it's possible to change. And I do genuinely believe people can change. And I think sometimes what social media allows you to do is say you were this person, you can decide you want to be this person and you can and you can be that person without other people knowing who you were before.

Yes. And I think there's a, there's a real like beauty to that that you can progress and that you can change. And then, you know, you're not getting pulled back. Yeah. I think that's a reason why loads of people love to go away solo traveling and stuff like that is because like they feel like they have to live up to a certain persona that they created maybe when they were younger when they were a teenager in front of their friends or people that know them. And then, you know, obviously you're not like you shouldn't be the same person that you were in your 20s than you are in your teenage years and in your 30s as you are in your 20s. Like you should be kind of grown and adapting and becoming more self-aware, whatever it is and changing what you value. But it's, like, you should be kind of grown and adapting and becoming more self-aware or whatever it is and changing what you value. But it's, Like then when you go away, you kind of have that kind of fresh. The freedom.

Yeah. And I think it's a scary thing. Like I literally had this conversation with someone and like I'll literally use her own words. She was like, I'm the fat, funny friend. And I was like, because she came to me and she wanted weight loss. And I was like, okay, well, what would your life look like if you weren't the fat friend? If you were just the funny friend. And she was like, you know, I don't, I don't know.

And I was like, sometimes that shift change, that personality change is like just as scary. Yeah. because it's like it's your whole it's your whole identity it's your identity and even if it's something that you don't want anymore like there's a safety and that and you keep resorting back to it yeah and again that's another reason why I think people find themselves stuck is because they identify with I'm this person and actually you know the person they want to be as this person but they're struggling to bridge the gap between the two and they feel like they need to stay as this person to keep their friends to keep their identity to feel comfortable.

And that can be quite a shift that you need to kind of break past as well. Yeah, that's, that's a huge mindset shift that has to come along with it. And it's like, it's the same if someone says, oh yeah, I'm just lazy or I'm just not motivated and stuff like that. It's like you're just, you're attaching a certain identity to you because that's what you've known the whole time and it's, it's comfortable. And it's just trying to find proof to why you're not that thing. It's like, okay, well, if I make my,

I might be lazy, but if I make my bed today, at least I'm less lazy because my bed's made her. And you know, it's like that is like a win or a bit of evidence that, you know, you're not what you were saying that you weren't. Like, it takes time though, doesn't it? Yeah. And I think I've done a lot with this with myself because it's like, I think the easiest way that I found that I've battled that is you know how you say to yourself in your head? I'm not. So it's like, I used to say to myself, I'm not a runner. I can't run. I'm not a runner. and I last year, like before Christmas, I ran a 10K. And I was like, wow, I was like, I'm a runner now. But it's like shifting that from going, I'm not a runner is never going to get you anywhere.

Whereas if you're like, I'm trying to be a runner or like, you know, I'm figuring out whether I'm a runner or like I'm going to be a runner. Even just saying that to yourself, what with anything like, even with that example, you know, I'm lazy. I'm not lazy. I'm going to make my bed. or like I'm the sort of person that makes their bed in the morning shifting from I'm lazy to I'm this person because how you talk about yourself really does then lead through in your actions

whether you like it or not yeah yeah and then also that also flips the other way as well as the other way around as well as how your actions will lead to how you talk about yourself well you know what I put my runners on and I and I went for a run down to the end of the road or not so you know I've created evidence that I am

I am, but what I say I am. Yeah. But a lot of it starts with just deciding that, all, I'm going to do these two things in order to make this change. It's, I'm going to say, say I am what I am and I'm going to prove it to myself as well. Exactly. I think that, if you can do those two things, I think that's literally where all change originates or comes from.

Last question I'll have for you. So what are the most important relationships? in your life right now? I'm very lucky. I have a fantastic family and I have a lovely boyfriend and a great group of friends. And I think my friends right now

support me so much. I think your social group and who you're around makes the biggest difference. You know, I can be grafting and working. I've not seen my friends in weeks. Don't worry, Claire, we can't wait to see you when you come out.

So supportive. I've had friends in the past that I don't reply for a few weeks. It's like, well, you're not my friend. Those people hold you back so much more than you realize. And maybe it's nothing, again, maybe it's nothing to do with them. Maybe, you know, they miss you or want to see you. But I think that understanding of being like, you know, Chloe, we support what you're doing. We appreciate what you're doing.

We share your pages. You know, I post every day. They're liking every post. You know, they're commenting every, like, you know, it's supportive friends, supportive family. your relationship bit that's is massive. And do you think that you have a good balance with you know, work life to relationship life? Um, I'm getting better. I'm getting better. Um, I was, I was, I was like single, really single for like two years. So you were able to be selfish with your time. Oh yeah. Like I was literally just like in my graph mood. Like I literally didn't like,

like even, do you know how you're meant to be like the fun single friend? Like my friends just stop asking. They're like she's doing nothing. She's working, she's boring. She's not out. She's on our laptop. Yeah, it's like she's got nothing to give us. There's no gossip. But I think, yeah, so like now then sharing your time with other people is like, oh, okay.

Like, you know, I've got to draw back a little bit more time from just being locked in and actually go live a little bit. It's difficult, isn't it? Yeah, it's difficult. But Dave, do you find when you do spend that time with them that you feel more rejuvenated when you do work? Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah. And like my boyfriend right now, he's great because he's very chilled. I'm quite like high energy. I can get a little bit stressed. And he's just like, Clot's just put your phone down. And I'm like, okay. So it's quite a good balance because it just like manages me to just like call off a little bit. And then as you say like when you then go back to it, you've got more energy or you feel mentally more clear because you've had that time off. It's just about having someone. I think that like supports you to say I support you when you're working hard.

but I also know when to be like, I think you're done. Yeah, is this ambition or is a burnout kind of thing? Yeah, are you actually going to get anything more productive or are you just like staring at your screen? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Claude, if people wanted to keep up with the work that you do,

if they wanted to reach out and ask you any questions in terms of coaching in terms of training, any general questions as all, where can they find you? Train with Arcadia on Instagram and then Train with Arcadia on TikTok. I am on Facebook as well. But I would say the best place to find me is probably Instagram. Okay, and we'll leave it in the show notes. Thank you very much for today. I appreciate it.

Thanks, Carl. I appreciate it. Thanks for watching. If you like that episode and you want to see more content like this, make sure you're subscribed and I'll see you on the next one.