We Might Be Drunk - Ep 21: Orange Wine

Episode Date: May 3, 2021

Mark and Sam drink some natural orange wine and talk about loud phone talkers, tip intimidation, and guys who celebrate their birthday for too long.  This episode is sponsored by Fireside! Get Fireside cocktails at www.drinkfireside.com and use code DRUNK at checkout for 10% off.   Big thanks to Gotham Podcast Studio for hosting us!    

We might be drunk, we might be drunk, as long as we are hanging out, you know we might be drunk. Raise a glass, let's talk shit, pep heaps, wrecks, and a bit, maybe drunk. We might be drunk, yeah. Hey, we're here folks, this is it it We might be drunk Not yet We're about to crack open A new bottle of something I've never heard of You heard that pop

I love the pop It's a little natural wine I don't even know What color it is But Natural Aren't all wines natural No

Some are This I don't know I don't know a lot about wine I know the difference Organic wine All I know about this wine Is the hangover Is so much less Oh great so that's huge yeah it tastes good some of it is funky you can

get like an orange wine it's kind of trendy right now i found out about this when we were on the road with aziz it'd be me phil hanley you know whoever uh will sylvaince who didn't drink but he'd be along for the ride yeah mateo, whoever, but he would order these weird, funky wines, and they tasted really weird and good, and we were never hungover. Wow. We'd be tired from the road. We'd be a little hungover. Yeah, that's the thing about hanging out with rich people

is they teach you a few things about some class. Look at that color. Wow, it looks like cider. Doesn't it? Yeah. Learned a lot from these rich people who took us on the road. They put the spoon on that side, the fork on this side. It was all...

Titanic? You didn't figure that out in Titanic? I didn't remember it. It was like going to etiquette school again. What do you think? Cheers, cheers. Tell me what you think. Smells kooky. It's got a bite.

It's kind of fun, right? I like it. I like it. Let's do red next time. I'm a big wino guy because I like the drunk that wine gives you. It's a good loopy. You sometimes can get belligerent on bourbon. You can get a little crazy on tequila. Oh, yeah.

Wine, you just get sloppy and silly, and I love that. Yeah, yeah, but the red with the tongue, the thick wooden tongue, and the purple teeth, and the hangover is bananas. The hangover can be rough. It's not as bad with this. Oh, great. And it still gets you nice and fucked up.

I like it. I'm into it. Carlin was a wino. What? George Carlin went to rehab for wine. Is that right? Yeah. He would just-

Wow. I'm sure there was other shit going on there. A little nose candy, I think, as well. He was a wino. I've never heard him talk about drinking. That's fascinating. Yeah. And then it's funny to go to rehab for wine.

It feels so romantic. It's the only time we rehab where they're like, all right's fascinating. Yeah. And then it's funny to go to rehab for wine. It feels so romantic. It's the only time we rehab where they're like, all right, pussy. Yeah, right? Jesus, what year? It is. This is nice. I kind of like it. Yeah.

You know, they got rid of, what was it, Prohibition. They had Prohibition. They said alcohol was the meth of its day. what was it, Prohibition. They had Prohibition. They said alcohol was the meth of its day. Yeah. So they'd just be guys like in an alleyway,

shit-faced or falling over or passed out. Interesting. Yeah, like farmers were big into booze and they would just get drunk and lay in hay. Yeah, that was in that Ken Burns doc, right? Yes, yes. And how like the bar keeps would run for office and stuff because they were so popular. Exactly, exactly.

Everything was built around booze. Like even stand-up was like comics and gin joints and mafia nightclubs yeah there's something about it man something about prohibition too where you're like this isn't allowed that's kind of how i felt doing comedy during the pandemic yeah speak easy we're like this i'm not supposed to be i remember like on one of the roofs, someone took a joint down. Do I have to put it out? And I was like, dude, none of this is legal. Yeah, exactly. We could all die.

It was like having a black friend in the 40s. Woohoo, we're on the edge. Yeah. Yeah, I loved that part of the pandemic. That's something we'll tell our kids about. Like, oh, turn off your VR sex worker. I got to talk about this pandemic I was in 30 years ago. Yeah, the way that you used to, you know, when like your mom would be banging on your door like dinner and you're like i'm studying but

you were jacking off yeah now it's gonna be parents doing and the kids like fucking a sex robot like come on just no fucking the sex robot at dinner come on right this is crazy what about um sorry get some gas i had a show i got we free food, and it's all coming out. I got the salmon, so this is going to be rough. We got the white wine with the salmon. Yeah. See, I like a white over red because I feel like it's light. I feel like I'm just drinking water on a crisp day in the sun. But this is a thick wine.

This is a thick white, at least, rather. This is like a jism white right here. Yes. Thick white. It's like a jism white right here. Yes, thick white. It's like a Rosie O'Donnell or a Kirstie Alley. So you didn't have a good set there, though? Oh, was it rough? I mean, it's one of those giant rooms that keeps going and going. So everybody, of course, sits in the far back because they don't want to be up front.

Sure. And then it's very stuffy. It's very rich. They're all members. The furniture is super nice. Members i know brutal i always think of the scene in caddyshack when dangerfield walks in and it's like as a kid that's what you want like you know he walks into the stuffy country club and he's just zinging everybody yeah he walks up to that old lady i bet you were something before electricity all right i'll tell you i feel like that's most of

my life is is if people were here they'd be laughing but you guys hate me but like even at soho i'm like you guys hate me but if an audience was watching this on tv i'd be doing well exactly they're like i i don't hate you i'm dead on the inside right and you're like right i'm taking it personally but you are you're miserable you're hot and you're miserable and you i can let my guard down enough to perform and bomb for you people but you can't let your guard down enough to crack a smile that's a great way to put it but again i keep trying to put myself in their you know italian loafers and go okay there's six people here eight people there's a lot of pressure on them but they don't laugh

doesn't mean they hate you so i try to give them the benefit but they hated me let's be honest you went on first yeah that's never easy to crack it open though now tyler fisher hosted who's super positive great guy and talked to all of them but you know what's tough is a dark joke with eight people is dead in the water there were eight people there maybe 11 it was rough it's a meeting that's not a fucking show. I know. I know. And then the meeting was say it was an intervention to quit comedy. You should not be doing this. That's tough when you have a dark joke for a small crowd. They look at you.

This was my first few years in comedy. They look at you kind of like we just don't like you. It's not the material. We don't like you. Yes. We think you're a bad guy because of these jokes. You're like, no, these jokes don't represent me. I just think this is funny.

Yeah. I'm not this guy. I open with a pedo joke, and they were like, what? Are you crazy? And I'm like, oh, yeah. You guys don't know me. Can't open with that. Yeah.

I know. But it's also like, you know who ain't making pedo jokes? Pedos. Yes. Good point. Good point. So maybe this is a good sign right hey right yeah jared fogel is not doing any pedophile material he's steering clear of that uh yeah it's it's interesting

i was talking to harry before the show producer harry and uh you know he was that he was asking because we talked last episode what makes a good comedy club because we're saying like these are the clubs we like we left off acne by the way i was thinking minneapolis great club good call good call but you know and i'm sure we left off a million but yeah uh yeah there's something about like low ceilings everything that's everything that makes covid bad is good for comedy good for comedy so true people on top of each other. Yeah, yeah. Hot, dingy room, smoky, low ceiling. Yeah, yeah.

It's all horrible. It's all bad for corona. Yeah. Great for comedy. But speakeasies, that seemed like fun. You know, that's the invention, or not the invention, but that's what led to Mexico, like border towns. Because they'd hop the border just for a cocktail.

Damn. Yeah, that's how it all started. They hopped the border for a drink. That's how bad people wanted to drink, because there wasn't blow yet and stuff like that. There wasn't like Percocet back then, so they had to get creative, and all they had was booze. That was the only way to cut the edge. It's funny that booze is legal, because you see how dangerous it is. I know.

I feel like we drink, but I feel like we drink pretty responsibly yeah now yeah we took a few road bumps to get there i remember us at industry parties back when we were young comics and there was an open bar and it was like it was just us like guzzling shots oh yeah and me walking up to someone like this is you yeah no like i'm the president of n. I'm like, oh, okay. That's so true. Oh, man. We didn't realize we were burning some bridges. No, no. But we were 24 or 26, whatever it was.

And also back then there was no thought of mixing alcohol. It was just like, oh, I'll take a beer. I'll take a tequila. I'll take a red wine. I'll take a Jaeger. Whatever it was, you just took it. And the goal was like, okay, the bar is going to close. I got to black out before then.

We were not mature. And I think I don't want to ever become an alcoholic because I don't want to ever have to quit. Oh, yeah. I like it too much to abuse it. Yeah. I mean, we abuse it probably slightly. Sure. Well, it's like a girlfriend.

Emotional Yes Now Yeah, no, you're right We abuse it a little, but we know where It's almost like comedy We know where the line is We cross it a little with alcohol

And then we bring it back And just like in comedy, in 10 years People are going to be like, and you did what? That's true, yes Thank God there's not documentation of my college and high school years drinking oh my god i think says everybody the yakking on myself all that shit i remember doing prom shows completely just shithouse wasted yeah and like guess what it was your like caroline's comedy club yeah it would be you go on at like 3 30 in the morning they'd be shithouse wasted

you're like what am i i'm gonna pay 25 bucks what am i not gonna get hammered exactly i gotta get my money somehow and they're gonna hate me anyway so i might as well have fun sold out room and they're paying us 25 bucks to get home at 6 a.m yeah yeah and there were some great nights there were some great nights it would be great when we didn't know we'd be there and you'd be like ah yeah yeah you're an idiot too. We both need a gig. Yeah. But it was just fun because it was a real knife fight.

That was a real lesson in like, hey, you don't just tell your jokes. You got to be on your feet in the moment, zinging and zanging with these horny 18-year-old kids with a crustache and a boner. You had to really riff and go off the the script you start bombing you're like all right who's the nerd they all start cheering you're like all right let me throw someone else under the bus here oh yeah this guy's a virgin he just started jerking off he likes her but she's into this guy yeah that was always fun they'd be like oh my god he knows us yeah those gigs were hell those were awful when you'd start a show at 5 p.m. because you're like on Linda Smith's show.

Oh, yeah. And then you're like, all right, well, I'm starting at 5 p.m. and my last spot is at 3.45 a.m. This is going to be a weird night. Yeah, and you're like, I better have a beer now. And then you have another beer throughout every show until the 3.30 one. You show up to Caroline's at like 3.30 in the morning without a shirt on. You sure you're on tonight?

Like, I'm on. And then Burt Kreischer's like, what the fuck? That's my thing. Yeah yeah those were wild times and no real i mean we didn't think about consequences it was a fun way to live there were consequences but we didn't think about them that's true now i'm always in my head like i guess because we're older yeah and also you can't you're that guy in your 20s that's all right but you're that guy in your 30s it's you're there's you're not a work in progress anymore right you're you're the work right right that's so true i did a video shoot and it was a pretty big shoot with a guy i'm not gonna say who it is but we know him well and we went we did a lunch break and they're like go wherever you want for lunch in the city and then come back in like an hour and he put down like four beers at lunch wow and he came back and he was a little loosey-goosey and they were like this is not cute

anymore like this we should fire you you're you're gross you're pathetic and he was like oh shit he thought he was fun richard belzer yeah it was low in order that was the shoot but yeah yeah it was uh it was it was an eye-opener for me yeah that's a problem where you just you gotta have a handle on it because it's so easy not to that's the thing is like it would be so easy to become an alcoholic for us because we drink for free at every club yep you get bored there's so much downtime totally i mean that's the thing too you get off stage and you feel that energy from the crowd. Say that you crush.

You get off stage, you're like, I need a drink. I can't just let that feeling go. I need something. Or you bomb and you're like, oof, I got to get rid of that feeling. No matter what, you're like, I need a drink. That's so true, yeah. I never thought of it like that. It's the cure all.

It's a great drug. Great drug. It kind of just adapts to you. Whatever you need, it goes with it. You want to keep partying, it's a great night, you drink. If you have a horrible night, you drink. Back in the day, meth was that. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah.

Damn. Meth does not look fun. The thing is, alcohol can be awful, and you can look awful, but can also look fun. That's true. Meth never looks fun. Don Draper had a scotch. Kings have these chalices with wine in it so they're still successful people you know they crack a bottle of champagne

when they sell a big thing at ford or whatever you know so there's booze still in successful places but there's no meth in like you know the white house or whatever that's a good point i know don draper was a miserable guy but he looked like he was having a good time he had a there was some good times peppered in but he was banging so many hot women they're like i know you're unhappy but this is like high this is top shelf misery yes yes this is the belvedere of like sadness here yeah exactly yeah it's like you say the the party from the man you know you got to separate them and we his man, but we also saw the party. Yeah, Breaking Bad, it's like, I know they were just selling meth,

but even just like that, just being around it. Like, who do you rather be, Don Draper or Jesse Pinkman? Come on. Yeah, no doubt about it. No doubt. No. Got to go Draper all day. Pinkman, eh.

Yeah, not a fan? Well, he was a good guy, but just a sad life when the girlfriend OD'd and just the giant hoodies and the outfits. Yeah, I don't know. She was hot, dude. She was hot. That was tough to see her go.

I know. Are you a big Breaking Bad guy? Oh, yeah. Seen it many times. Yeah. I always say I think that changed TV. That was so good. It was like, I didn't know TV could be this good.

You know who it might have been? I don't think he's talked about enough as being such a great actor on that show is the guy who plays Gus. Gus. Oh, the chicken guy. Yeah. Yeah, that guy's amazing. That guy's amazing. Yeah.

Odin Kirk is great. The guy Mike is great. But everyone talks about Odin Kirk. Yeah. And he's a fucking action star now. I know. Good for him. But that guy Mike is great.

The bald guy who's like the right hand man of Odin Kirk. Oh, yeah. He's like the muscle. Yeah. Yeah. That guy's awesome. Yeah. Love that show. From Beverly Hills Cop.

Is he? He's the goon in Beverly Hills Cop. Wow. He's the guy who killed Eddie Murphy's friend in the beginning. And he's a guy, Eddie Murphy. He looks the same. He looks like a tough guy. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. That guy's cool. That guy used to be on TV a lot more. That just like quiet, tough guy. Kind of fix it all. Like the wolf from Pulp Fiction. The guy who just came in and handled shit. Lots of cream, lots of sugar.

Dead end word storage. Yeah. That scene, holy shit. Oh, when I was done with it, it didn't look like a fucking tampon. Yeah. Fuck, dude. Can I give you a peeve that hit me today?

Please, please give me a peeve. So I'm in the, I went to a different sandwich place today. I need a sandwich during the day. I'm a big sandwich guy. It's funny, I was talking to someone the other day and she goes, I've never gotten to sandwiches.

I was like, you've never gotten to sandwiches i was like you never got into sand it's the most basic thing yeah it's like saying i fucking hate america i've never gotten to sandwiches i never got into movies and ice cream hate dogs tv not for me yeah yeah you know uh yeah she but anyway i go and there's a guy he's not on speakerphone but he's the loud guy and it's a small place so he's literally buzzing in my ear yes on the loud call and he's it's never a dude having a thoughtful conversation on these calls because they're an idiot they're lacking awareness right asshole so what they're saying is never what I have to I'm forced to listen to is never something that is interesting in any way. Yes, yes.

I literally hear him keep going, I'm different from other people. I invest in the man. Oh. He kept saying that. Oh, man. What a cheese dick. I want to be like, I invested in a machete just now, you piece of shit. Yeah, wow.

I would be so embarrassed to say that out loud, let alone yell it in a store. He yelled it. And it was like the point that I was ordering my sandwich, and I couldn't. She was like, what? And I'm like, oh, this. I was so close to snapping. I held it. I was kind of like in my head, like, be calm.

This is his shit. I was like, ooh, I hate that. I gave him dirty looks. Oh, good. Good. The dirty look is underrated. I love a dirty look. Yeah.

I get a dirty look. It stones me for like a week i just i'm in the shower like oh that was a bad look i gotta change my shit but no good that guy stinks i hate that guy i also hate the guy who talks on the phone like this yeah yeah all right uh-huh uh-huh yeah it's like all right just put it to your ear like a human being who do you think you are how about how about the person i'm so glad we did away with flip phones for the people that that would love to hang up. And you might go just going.

They would just snap it. They wouldn't even say bye. They would just do, like, oh, you're not Ari Gold, motherfucker. Right, right, yeah. Or if they say, Sam, out. All right, we get it, Seacrest. Or anyone who goes, anyone who has a thing, speak. Yeah, that guy's the word.

This is all very L i picture the bluetooth you know yeah my dad and this this sums up my dad in one moment one action is he doesn't say bye on the phone he just hangs up i fucking hate that and you're like hey dad like i'm your son tell me bye you know i don't know i'm still going i'm still making up bullshit conversation because i think you're there and then you just hear like, do, do, do like, Oh geez, dad's gone. That is so weird.

I know it's so, it's so little intimacy. What did he just say? Okay. And hangs up. Not even an okay. He's like, well,

what time am I picking you up? I'm like, Oh, pick, uh, can you pick me up at five? He's like, yeah,

I can make five work. And I'm like, Oh thanks. And he's already gone. Damn. Yeah. Cause he's just like information. It's not mean,

but he's just like, I got the info i'm good my biological dad did that but without the phone but uh no it's interesting man that's i had a friend who did that to it and it drove me nuts the friend who he wouldn't even say bye what he would just do is oh no he wouldn't say i gotta go he would just go okay bye he wouldn't say i gotta go right he'll just give you the hard buy i'm like you gotta work to the buy to the buy say all right but i'll tell you though it also bothers me well i'm keeping you let's just say i gotta go yes i hate that i'm well i don't want to take a bit well i know i'm keeping you yeah i'm gonna let you go how about how about i choose when i go you don't get to

decide my schedule for me okay totally totally with you so with you uh how about this one with the phone we're on the phone. Jeffrey Joseph had the funniest joke. I loved it. I wish I had wrote it. I miss that guy. I love that. I saw him in Vancouver last year.

Oh, really? Yeah, he lives there now. Wow, he actually went to Canada. He's one of the few people who said, I'm going to Canada. He went. If Trump wins, I'm going to Canada. Yeah, he went. Respect.

Good for him. Vancouver's great. Oh, yeah, we just did a whole. He's getting a lot of acting work too He's a great actor He's in The Sopranos That's right He's in a ton of shit

He's got a great resume He's in Scrooged He's in the scene in The Sopranos where they handcuff Johnny Sack That's right at the wedding You are farting like crazy I'm sorry this is the salmon I'm bummed that you haven't given Rick and Morty more of a shot because you are Rick in some ways.

Is he a farter? He farts, he belches, but he's also really smart. All right, I'll take it. So wait, Jeffrey Joseph, he has this great bit about, you always see the guy in New York on the sidewalk like, fuck that guy, I'm going to blah, blah, blah, blah. But you never see the guy in New york on the phone going uh-huh is that right you never hear that guy it's always the guy yelling and it's so true

because every time i walk by a guy going motherfucker i'm gonna come over there and you're like i think of his bit it's a sign of it is funny when you see an angry person on the phone in new york when you see someone melting down yeah it does give you it's almost like seeing like it's almost like seeing someone else get pulled over by the cops. Better them than me. It's weird. You ever see someone else step in shit and you're like, I'm not happy you stepped in shit, but I'm glad that you sacrificed yourself for the block in a way. Totally.

I mean, that's the whole premise of America's Funniest Home Videos. Like that guy fell off the ladder. He got kicked by a pony. You know, the fat guy fell asleep at the birthday and went through the cake. For sure. And like that guy, I saw a guy, though, snap on the phone.

He's just like a little Jewish guy, a little Jewish old man. He goes, you fucking asshole, you listen to me. And I was like, oh, that just like made my day. That energy just made me happy. You piece of shit. I love it. And it's funny because we talk about

how we hate the guy yelling on the phone, but that guy we don't mind. He's doing it out in the open, so he's going to be – if it's in an enclosed space, you're a fucking monster. That's a good point. Who raised you? I don't get that thought process because I used to work out at the rec center. I love the rec center. I love the rec center. It's the best kept secret in the city, and we shouldn't even be plugging it. You're right. I was just talking about this the other day. Don't i love the rec center it's the best kept secret in the city and

we shouldn't be plugging it you're right i was just don't go to the rec center don't i shouldn't have said the price but you're right it's the best kept secret me and salak has went to the tennis courts the other day it's beautiful it's right on the river no we just went for a shoot but uh i was like why don't i come here i should start playing tennis you should play tennis like in fucking annie hall or something i would love that. I'm terrible, though. I'm terrible, too, so it'll be perfect. But I'd love to get good at it. Yeah, hell yeah. And it's good exercise, and it's right.

You don't have to run around too much. It's perfect. Dude, racquetball, too. That's where it's at. Oh, we're not successful enough for racquetball. No, but I'd like to get there. That's like Gordon Gekko. Because it looks fun.

It does. In college, they had it in the gym, so I got to go when I was in New Orleans. So we'd go play, and it was like, this is so fun. Oh, the Riley Center. I only played a couple times though. Yeah, yeah. But it was great. It is fun.

We got to find a way. Dude, we got to. That's a good idea. We'll do a video there. Let's do a video. Are you good at it? No, I haven't played in 20 years. But I love the eep, eep, eep, eep.

I love that. And you get the ball sound. It's very tense because you're in that box. I feel like we're going to have Matthew McConaughey-like energy if we get to do it. That's true. What was I saying? Shit. Oh, the rec center.

You work out at the rec center. I worked out in the village. It was a mixed bag of old white people and a random Colombian guy and then a crazy crazy like beaked up Logan Paul kind of guy yeah and this Logan Paul guy would blare uh like Van Halen and whatnot and then this Dominican guy would blare salsa and we all hated both of them but they'd be there on different days and then one day they showed up together and both blared their music so it was like you know eddie van halen versus uh merengue or whatever the hell and they were like what are you doing he was like what are you doing and it was like the highlight of my life because i'm like you're both asshole assholes you're both

assholes and now you get to see it and how did it end uh one guy was like stormed off and left and the other guy kept his music and in his mind he's like oh i guess i won i beat the bad guy i'm like you're the bad guy you just can't tell that's oh that's the best you like when the two like it's almost like seeing yourself in a bizarro mirror yes you're like oh this guy's an asshole and then you're like i'm an asshole right i wish they didn't see that though now they're too far gone as assholes the rude it's like the rude person on the on the plane too far gone as assholes the rude it's like the rude person on the on the plane who's like got they've got an important business call and you're just like all right dude you're not that special right imagine if you could get cell phone service on flights it would be oh good point good point because you sometimes you're on a on a everyone amtrak and you're like oh i fucked up i didn't

send the quiet car and there's just that dude just on the business call and i know you're like, oh, I fucked up. I didn't send the quiet car. And there's just that dude just on the business call. I know. You're not that fucking important. Yeah. And just attempt. Just the attempt to be like, hang on, man. I'm on the train. I got to talk a little lower. That, that's all I need.

The low, yeah. If you even said that, I'll fucking, so much respect. So much respect. That goes a long way. But it's the idea, like, it's my train. No one else is on it. I do what I want. That's what kills me.

No one near me is important. Go ahead. Yeah, exactly it i do what i want that's what no i got no one near me is important go ahead yeah exactly what do you what do you got that's what it is the worst seat you're a bigger guy sometimes i'll give the dirty look and they're like some pussy gave me a dirty look i'm like god damn it that happened yeah i've had that before whoa yeah yeah which now now i'm like i wish i never gave the look because now i'm even more embarrassed. No, you got to give the look. Yeah, I guess so. It's important to give a, they should at least know. Get enough hints. You're cracking the armor just a little bit.

One day, hopefully it'll break. Yeah, good point. Hopefully, well, what about the guy who plays the loud casino game on the bus? Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. You know, you hear the coins. It's your fault for being on the bus. I guess soing, bing, bing, bing, bing. You hear the coins. It's your fault for being on the bus. I guess so. The bus is anybody's game. Train and plane,

you gotta fucking... But when you're on the bus, it's like, yeah, you're... Subway's another one where it's like, I can go on for days about this shit. First off, the toenail clippers on the subway, I hope I'm not overstating, I think deserve the death penalty. Yes. And I'm not talking about a lethal injection.

I think they should be beheaded like ISIS. Yes. And then, and then I think we should start with the toes and then cut their head off. Yeah. So then here's the other thing. The toenail clippers, the hot meal guy. Ooh. Don't bring your fucking halal on an enclosed space.

I don't want to smell your food. It's rude. Good point. Good point. Hear, hear. I love how want to smell your food. It's rude. Good point. Good point. Hear, hear. I love how we said that before the jerking off. Yes. The jerking off.

I can handle that. I understand that. Yeah. But the hot food. What are you, crazy? The hot food is, at least there's no smell to jerking off. Depends on the season. On the shower situation.

Yeah. Yeah. You're right. right but all right no the jerking off is worse but only a little yeah i'll tell you a fun story my parents were in town which is always a nightmare but they were in town and my i met my parents for dinner at this nice restaurant and my mom was late and she was she finally showed up she's like's like, sorry I'm late. There was a guy masturbating on the car staring at me in the subway car. And I was like, what? Oh, my gosh. Because you just picture your poor mom and this guy with a huge dong looking at her. And I was like, oh, my god, are you okay?

And I felt violated and weird. And she was like, yeah, yeah, I just changed cars. And I'm like, why are you so fun? Every other girl is like, a guy looked at me and kissed me on the cheek and I wanted to call the police. And I'm like, my mom's getting jerked off on and she like didn't even think about it. Maybe she took the compliment and she kept moving. Good point.

That's how you do it. It is a compliment. And she's no surprise either. She's got short hair, Crocs, red frame Coke bottle glasses. There's a fetish for everything. Good point. Good point. Yeah.

He had a milf thing. Maybe the thing is I like women who look like they're into arts and crafts. She does. She looks like an art teacher who makes like, what do you call those? Like potholders. A vase? Yeah. Well, you know those like cute yarn potholders that can hold a pot?

I don't know. She's very into that shit, like knickknacks. It is. I mean, you just got to move. You got to move. That's all you got to do. I mean, you see a lot of people more now than ever is the people who are just losing their shit in public. Yeah.

This city broke people before the pandemic. That's true. That's true. I wonder, and this is my dumb theory, and feel free to kick me in the balls here, but I think we're all very, our world is very, what's the word? Not meticulated. Oh, calculated? No. Caricatured? What's the word? Come on, Sam. Thank thank you our world is very uh curated okay thank you you know you got your profile you got your twitter page you got your grub hub coming with your order i said gluten-free no toast you know it's all you you you it's your world then you go out into the the real world and it's jerking off it's toenail clipping it's uh the mariachi band and i think people snap a little for sure it's you have it your way yes time more than ever the as you said the world

it's your you've curated this is your own little world right everything is even an algorithm is based for your satisfaction great great way great everything is for you you know yes if amazon if you like this you might also like this exactly that doesn't happen on the subway if you like peace and quiet you might also like this guy showing you his butthole no it's not how it goes it's you can't control the world and that lack of apps even dating apps yeah it's all for you but that lack of control makes people crazy, I think. Yes, for sure. But also, no one should have to see a guy jerking his dick on the train. But, I mean, that's true.

But it could be a different thing. It could be the Showtime, Showtime, Showtime guys. And that's the beauty of life, is it's a double-edged sword. Like, there's horrible things, but there's also, I mean, you take an Amish guy, and he's gonna see the mariachi band on the train and be like, Oh my God, this is the best entertainment I've ever seen.

And it's free. What? Then he sees a Blackberry and he goes, oh, my God. Well, you might be Amish. You're still using a Blackberry. Dude, you know, it's like it is madness when you get in the subway. You're like, this is crazy. I kind of like that it's still a mess a little bit.

That's what I'm saying. I think it's still a good thing. You need it. It levels everybody. You get a celebrity on that subway and he's just as down as you or down as anybody else. It's fun when you see a celebrity on there. Yeah. Give me a good one you've seen. I saw Seth Meyers on there when

he was doing Weekend Update, like before the late show. So that was kind of cool. Like, wow, this is like a New York guy riding the subway. And he's the Weekend Update anchor when SNL was like still SNL. Now we just know everybody on SNL and we know half the writers. So it doesn't feel special. Yeah.

I saw David Hyde Pierce like a few years ago. Frazier. That's a good one. Yeah. Very, you know, Very incognito. He's got his little glasses, his hat down glasses. But yeah, it was him. That's cool.

Yeah. I smoked a cigar on the subway with Bill Burr once. What? Yeah, it was crazy. Empty? Not really. I mean, it was two in the morning. There was seven guys on it, but we just tucked in the corner.

We were smoking cigars after a show. Amazing night. We got drunk at some Mexican restaurant, drank tequila all night. Was this the West side? Yes. Interesting. Yeah. I remember this night when you told me about it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Best night of my life. You know, one of them. And then we, we, he got outside. He's like, here you go. And I was like, oh my God, we're smoking cigars. We're talking, talking shit. And then he's like, ah, I got to get was like, oh, my God, we're smoking cigars. We're talking, talking shit. And then he's like, ah, I got to get back to my hotel.

I didn't know it was this late. And I was like, well, I'm going that way, too. And he goes, oh, let's get the train. So we're smoking in the subway. We're so drunk that we didn't even think about it. And we just got on the train. Damn. And we're just smoking in the train.

But it was so late, nobody cared. So you're like, part of me was like, man, you're 52 or what has he got to be? 50 years old? 50 maybe. I don't know, 49. Yeah, so if you live like this now, I can't imagine how you lived when you were 30. It's kind of fun to think about.

I love it. It's cool that he's such a good guy because he must know that we look up to him. Oh, yeah. I wrote the gayest, longest, sappiest message after because you're drunk, so you're like opening up. I was like, you don't know what you mean to me. You changed my life.

I love your comedy. I'll suck your dick. I love you. You want me to come over right now? I'll do it. And he wrote like, thanks. But no, he was nice. He was nice.

I love you, K. Yeah, exactly. He was cool. He was very generous as well and all that he's the coolest see that's what people don't get like a lot of these darker guys tend to be some of the darker on stage tend to be like the nicest people in real life yeah i think that's where they get it out exactly there's this gustav lebert quote i think i said it on the podcast before it says be violent in your work so you can be ordinary in your life.

I think about that a lot. Love it. Get it out there. Yeah. And then be a decent human. Exactly. Exactly. You know, it's like Tarantino has these people getting their heads cut off and, you know,

psycho scenes and blood. And he seems like a decent guy. I was going to say, he seems like he probably has a bunch of Thai hookers in his hotel every night. Yeah. But it's weird with comedy. I feel like we take it on the chest more. Yeah.

That's a weird way to put it. But we take it on the chin more because we're just that one guy. It was a crazy night with Burr. Yeah. Yeah. Who am I? Odell Beckham? But give that a go.

You don't get a lot of sports references like that out of you. Well, if you get shit on your chest, I'm going to remember you. I don't care about the touchdowns or the Heismans. Man, what a weird guy to lose from. He was so exciting. Yeah, yeah. Well, that chest thing was really a- It's a weird rumor to get.

Yeah, yeah. He didn't deny it, but pretty fucked up. This wine's hitting me nice. I love it. I'm bringing another bottle next week. Can we do a back-to-back wine week? Or is that weird? I don't know.

I think we got to mix it up. All right, we'll mix it up. But I'm down. I just like getting wine drunk. Pirouettes. Yeah, this is great shit. Tutti Frutti. Weird name.

Yeah. I don't feel like a hard-edged guy drinking it, but I don't give a fuck. No, no. I don't give a shit if you're judging me in those YouTube comments, which Mark will certainly read. That's true. And by the way, I read all the new ones. It's all about me reading the comments. Really?

I know you're reading this, Dickless. Get a life. And I would like it. I don't mind a ball busting in the comments. I'll take it. As long as it's not. As long as it's from a good place. Yeah, yeah.

Sometimes I crack up. I'll see them on Twitter more than that, obviously, or Instagram. And they make me laugh sometimes when they shit on me oh yeah as long as i can tell it's coming from a nice that's what ball busting is like a lot of people don't know what ball busting is it's you you need to tell that the person's kidding right otherwise you're just saying something shitty to another person exactly yeah yeah and and there's a difference between meanness and joke if you just go like you suck or you're bad or i hate you that's not ball busting that's just being mean ball busting is some kind of zing or a twist it's gotta be it's gotta be from the heart

i was at the cellar the other night with uh with salicus our boy we're filming something and you know we we roll up with dom also the other two did the drones on my last special the roof special oh yeah and we show up and joe derosa sees this immediately goes what is this for your sidewalk special if i maybe we all laugh pretty hard like that's how you ball bust that's great that's that's like you're shitting on me and there's truth to it but it's it's not fucking just straight up cruel that's yes that's how friends ball bust i also here's another thing i hate here's a there's a peeve oh boy lay it all busting when people are just louder than you oh so true you didn't win because you talked over me motherfucker yes so true i saw a thing on the internet i'm not gonna say who it was but this young guy

was getting the best of this vet comedian and the vet just got louder and i'm like this guy is actually funnier than you you just know that and so you're trying to drown him out damn yeah it was ugly that's almost like in a wrestling match where like they've got you beat and you distract the ref and you just like hit him with the chair or something yeah exactly yeah you stab them no one's looking the end of gladiator yeah yeah basically hold on let me let me give you my peeve oh boy this is a girlfriend thing and uh drives me nuts i feel like if we if we tracked all your peeves they all go back to well she's a cute younger lady, so I feel like the world has been her oyster a little bit, so I get annoyed with how roses and fairy dust everything is. Because I might have repaired a mortgage. But either way, this is the dumbest thing, but it drives me crazy.

I hate a lot of questions because I hate saying I don't know. I feel guilty saying I don't know. So the more questions you ask that I don't know the answer to, I feel shittier by saying I don't know. Give me an example. You know, just like, hey, what was the name of it? What's the capital of Turkey? And I'm like, and I'll look it up because I don't want to say I don't know. I feel like too many people give you an I don't know. And it's just like kind of a throwaway like hey uh what color is your shirt i don't know and i don't want to be that guy so i want to be nice and try to help and say something

but it's weird when people ask anything when google exists well that's that's true too but she'll ask me questions that there's no way i can know the answer to and i'm like what are you doing this is how would i know this what is this like fucking pop quiz jeopardy not it's and it's not malicious here's an example a package will come for her and i'll bro like oh there's a package for the gal i'll bring it up to her you know see see what it is you know and i walk in and i go hey you got a package she goes what is it i don't fucking know it's a package but it's that shit all the time what is it what is it i'm like i don't know know. It's a package. But it's that shit all the time. What is it? What is it?

I'm like, I don't know. It's a box. It's a cardboard box with your name on it. You open it. But I feel, and it's, I just go, I don't know. You open it. The other day, our cat knocked over something in the other room. It was like, psh.

And she was like, what was that? I don't know. It's in the other room. How could I know that? We both are in the same boat here. We got to go look at it. I don't, what was that? Let me use my x-ray vision real quick exactly exactly so now i'm the guy going i don't know it's so funny that you have a cat you're so you so don't strike me as a cat guy

not a cat i grew up with cats but uh you gotta see me at four in the morning i'm making love to this thing i love it i i'm in my underwear squeezing it and rubbing it and the cat's got one leg up and i'm in the gut. That's great. But all the other parts sucks, you know, the shitting and the litter. Does the cat claw up your furniture? Not at all. We got lucky. It's like a great cat.

It's never hissed. It's never clawed. It's never bitten. Is it declawed? No, just a house cat that's real chill and laid back. Damn. See, if I had someone who stayed home and took care of it, what do you do when she goes on the road with you? We have her friend comes by, and they're all like broke comics.

So they're like, we get to stay in the village for a weekend? Hell yeah. Nice. And they just take care of the cat. Are you worried that they're banging in your bed, though? I gave one of them the business. Like, you better not be fucking any disgusting open micers in here. I don't even want any open micers in my home.

And she was like, okay, okay. Really? Yeah, yeah. I was just like, hey, I got to be honest about this. Yeah, I just think banging in the bed. in here i don't even want any open microns in my home and she was like okay okay really yeah yeah i was just like hey i gotta be honest about this yeah i just think banging in the bed it's like that's your bed that's where you sleep even if you change the sheets there's i don't like it i don't even like them sleeping there to be honest so it's already a push so i was you get the cat is that it's a nice touch you get a little you get a little it's a nice touch companionship late at night exactly i would love a pet.

I love in The Long Goodbye, Elliot Gould's got that little cat. Yes. It's nice. It's fun. Cats are, they get so, people go, you're a cat guy. Cats are cool because to me, I'm not saying they're better than dogs, but they're low maintenance. That's what it is.

Dogs are like, walk me twice a day, where cats are like, I'll shit in this box, do your thing. Right. I like that. I like that I can kind of go away. Cats are like cool chicks where you can just text, like, you up? That's exactly it. And dogs are like, you better fucking commit. Yeah.

Why don't you text me? Why don't you text me? You only get those 30 texts, and you're like, Jesus Christ. What are we? What are we? Exactly. I mean, a cat's cool, and it doesn't jump on you when you walk in like a dog does and you're like all right all right take it easy it's nice that you're happy to see me but

give it a second i realize why i have a lot of relationship problems now that i like cats yeah yeah you gotta earn it with a cat cats push you away the whole time that's true that could be a bit but yeah cat's great low energy low key, just wants to look out the window, sits on the sill and watches TV with you. They're great animals. Great animals. And there's so much hate for a cat. I don't get it.

I think it just became hip to hate a cat. I think it did. Yeah, it was like Dane Cook. It just became cool to hate him. But the cat's great. Everybody likes it. It's nice. It doesn't bother. I do podcasts at my house But the cat's great. Everybody likes it. It's nice. It doesn't bother.

I do podcasts at my house, and the cat just sits there and listens to us. Hard to make laugh, though. Can't get the cat to laugh. But I'll take it. But, yeah, great cat. You don't want to be a cat lady. That's the problem. What is a cat man better?

I think if you're just alone with a cat, you get that rap. I don't think it's gender specific, really. Cat lady gets the shit, but it's like, if you have multiple cats. That's what it is, the multiple. Yeah, if you just have one cat, I mean, shit, who cares? It's great, yeah. If you have multiple pets, that's tough. Nah, cats are cool.

It's like living with a pill head. You know, they just hang loose. They sleep a lot. They don't talk. It's great. It's like Stephen Wright in Half-Pace. I was just going to say that. It's fucking hilarious.

Wow, are you really? Our minds went to the same place. That's fucking amazing. Yeah. I was this close. That's great. Yeah. Cats are fun.

He's great in that movie. Bad rep. You know what it is? It's insecurity. Because people, the dog runs up. It licks your face. It's humping your leg. It's going nuts.

The cat, you're like, nothing? And you're like, hey, how about you make it like you? You know? Earn it. I like it. No, I'm into it. We're going to get, I know we're going to get shit on this one. I know.

But I like dogs, too. I'm just saying cats get unnecessary hate. Yes. That's all I'm saying. And I feel like in Manhattan, I don't want to abuse a dog by keeping it in a tiny apartment for 24 hours a day or whatever. I was in college. I lived with two guys, I remember. And one of them had a dog that he rescued from a, you know, it was a rescue dog.

And the dog was abused. And I'll say this. Like, it was sad. It was skittish. But you never had to tell that dog anything twice. It was kind of nice. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. You fucking were like, don't do that. It was like, ah. And I'm like, it was sad. It was skittish. But you never had to tell that dog anything twice. It was kind of nice. Oh, really? Oh, yeah.

You fucking were like, don't do that. It was like, ah. And I'm like, this dog listens. I'll tell you that much. That's great. But yeah, you do feel bad. You're like, fuck, abuse animals. Like, who the fuck does that?

Yeah, that's crazy. Who hits an animal? I've seen it in real time. And you're like, this guy. It's like being mean to the waiter, where you're like, ah, you're off. I want to fucking fight a dude. I know. And I can't even fight, but I want to get in there like this guy it's like being mean to the waiter where you're like ah you're off it's i want to fucking fight a dude i know and i can't even fight but i want to get in there yeah it's not good it's it's like hitting a kid or a baby yeah yeah not a fan or those remember when i was growing up they always said the guy would blow weed on the dog or pour beer in his

bowl don't make the fucking dog your drug buddy exactly real drug buddy yes there's a lot of guys out there who want to do drugs. Don't make the dog do it. It's so easy to find a guy to give weed to. Yeah, yeah, men love weed. Do you have any racks or no? I do, but I'm scared to say it because I feel like they should sponsor us

and maybe give us money, so I don't want to give them a free plug. All right, so let's not give it to them. All right, all right. Good, good idea. We'll talk about it after. I have one too that I think should be plugging us, and I don't want to give them a free plug. All right, so let's not give it to them. All right, all right. Good, good idea. We'll talk about it after. I have one too that I think should be plugging us and I don't want to give it to them.

I wonder if we have the same thing. I doubt it. Mine's pretty obscure. All right. Let me give you one more peeve with the girlfriend and I'll leave it alone. I love it. All right, all right.

I'm going to fly on the wall here. Well, you've had many ladies in your day so you know what I'm going through here but this is a gal thing so all you ladies listening, here. Well, you've had many ladies in your day, so you know what I'm going through here, but this is a gal thing, so all you ladies listening, get your shit together with this one. I don't know if I've said this on the pod, I hope not, but she loves the whole, oh, you're leaving? I'll leave with you. And you're like, okay. I got a 5.30 appointment at the doctor, so I'm leaving at 5. I planned it all out.

You know, I got my whole day. And she's like, oh, you're leaving? I'm like, yeah, I'm walking out. It's 4.59. I'm walking out the house. She's like, I'll go with you. I got to go get some batteries or whatever it is, run an errand. I'm like, all right.

But then that means do her makeup, hop in the shower, do the hair, get your shoes. Where's my good shoes? Where's my heels? I'm like, I don't know. And now it's 5.15, and I'm on the couch watching Matlock waiting for her to get it together while we leave because we had to leave together. This happened in 1992. Yes.

Yeah, no, I'm so with you on this one. The leaving is the leaving. I'll leave with you as we're leaving now. Now. You got to get up and leave. Man. It's also like, and I'm not even blowing you women with this shit, but like, you look great. Yeah.

You don't need to take 30 minutes on makeup. You look fine. Honestly. Totally. And yeah, it drives me insane. I remember I had a girlfriend once and we had,akers. I might have said this on the podcast. We'd get drunk every week on this. But I had a girlfriend and we had Lakers tickets, like good seats.

You did tell you this. Yeah. The whole point is she took forever to get ready. We get there in the late second quarter and I'm like, give me a fucking break. I've told this for sure. Yeah, yeah, that's brutal. Don't do this with fucking Kobe's farewell season season on the line here for fuck's sake this is why the copter went down i mean it's things like this that's not true that's not confirmed but i'm just saying like time is a factor now i sound like the wolf again from

pulp fiction time is a factor we have to be curt if i'm curt with you it's because time is a factor uh it's just i i respect time i'm like hey hey five o'clock that's when i leave that's what i've been planning all day i gotta be at the doctor at 5 30 maybe even a little earlier so like you're being kind of rude because you're making me late to something but we are also very aware of time because we get a set time at a club right 8 35 p.m we get there 8 25 8 30 yeah yeah you have to be so that's almost like program me to be very punctual true so when people are not punctual it makes me a little crazy same same and and the funny thing is people go oh you get there a little early because you don't want to miss your set. Like, no, I get there a little early because I don't want to ruin the show and fuck up everything and have people not be able to rely on me. It's more than just missing the set.

I don't want the host to freak out. Where are you? Yes. You're just trying to make people's lives easier. Whereas most jobs you can show up, you get there at 10 a.m. You can show up at 10, 15 and no one gives a shit. You can't do that with stand up. That's true.

Good point. Good point. there at 10 a.m you can show up at 10 15 and no one gives a shit you can't do that with stand-up that's true good point good point i mean i will say i was at the miami improv and they were going bending over backwards like thank you so much for being on time thank you for not going long i'm like jesus what kind of comics are here who was your last week in paul mooney i know i didn't want to say it but yeah i mean it must be a lot of that kind of stuff and uh they were like oh just thank you he's a legend but i remember he would show up to Caroline's. He was like an hour late where the host is like, I've done an hour. Yeah, yeah, I know. I know.

Great for the host. You get so much time. If you're young. If you're young. I don't know. It's also scary when you don't prepare an hour. You're like, I'm going to be 15. And then they're like, just keep going.

You're like, all right. Yeah, I don't even have an hour. I'm two years in or whatever. Yeah. But it was a lot of like Mencia type stuff where he would do two hours and there's a show after him and that kind of thing. I remember one time I met the seller and I'm hanging with like Keith Robinson and a few, I don't remember who else was there, but it was like a good group of comics were kicking

it and Carlos Mencia walks in and he had lost a lot of weight we didn't recognize him so keith goes oh look it's it's mike vecchione like we all laugh it's another comic who's a like a thinner yeah fit guy guy and then mencia like he kind of was probably awkward we're talking i remember years ago probably like nine years ago or something and we're like oh what does a comic make if they sell out Gotham comedy club for a weekend? We're all kind of like asking, I don't know. And then Mencia just leans over the table. 75 K.

That's what I get. That's him in a nutshell. And we all kind of look at him like, but we still don't respect you. And then I remember I was like, you know what? Let me see him on stage. Let me see how he is.

I gave it like three minutes and it was fucking dog shit. Damn. Well, there you go. But you knew that. Of course. Of course. But yeah, I just didn't want to say it into a microphone. But yeah.

Well, that ship has sailed. Yeah, I guess so. I've heard some horror stories. Like my friend opened for him, and he made him sell merch and didn't give him any money for it and all that. And then he would be like, you're lucky I gave you some exposure tonight. And he's like, I'm a working comic. What are you talking

about? Jesus. Yeah, this weekend was a nightmare. Then he stole four of his jokes. Yeah, exactly. You're lucky I gave you exposure. I'm taking your opener, your closer, and two of your jokes in the middle. I know. It's a weird business, but hey, we're lucky to be a part of it.

Do we have an ad? we don't okay just checking just checking we might we might have to plug it in i'm sure we'll have one by then so all right we'll plug it'll be an awkward cut from here yeah hey hey folks we might be drunk is brought to you by firesireside Cocktails. Love the Fireside. I got two on my bar cart right now, and that's when you made it, folks. When you're on the bar cart, you're in the house, you're in my belly. Fireside is

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I put it in there. She thinks I'm a mixologist. She thinks you're Tom Cruise in cocktail. Yes. Except I'm not a Scientologist. It's amazing. You just pour it over ice. It's perfect for this.

We're in the studio. We don't have to bring a bunch of ingredients here. So true. It's nice. You pour it over drinks. You have a girl over. You're just like, she's like, I want a cocktail. You don't have to go and take 20 minutes to make it.

I don't know how long it takes you, whatever. But their Negroni's a knockout. Not an easy one to get right, but they nailed it. I love a Negroni. Love a Manhattan, too. Manhattan's my favorite. Negroni might be my second favorite. Yeah, they got both, and they both taste great.

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and let's be real, you do. Of course. I feel like this Fireside mix, it's almost like the air fryer of drinks. You know, I want something top-notch good that i could never make but with them now i can do it i love it it tastes great goes down great just get ice anybody can do it get on it back to the show um wreck let me think what i have i listened to brew baker oh brew back brew back sorry x loved it i've heard him i have i listened to brubaker oh brubeck brubeck sorry x loved it i've heard him

i knew i knew that music for sure yeah it's pretty famous yeah yeah i definitely knew the music but like take five take five incredible it's i don't know if you've seen the the ebert doc but it's the oh you haven't seen it life itself it's so good i was a huge siskel and ebert guy as a kid oh they were great i mean yeah they were so they were so good together and was a huge Siskel and Ebert guy as a kid. Oh, they were great. I mean, they were so good together, and I much preferred Ebert. Oh, yeah. I think everyone did. Yeah. But they were so good.

It's great that they were rivals. And that dive bar in Chicago. Yes. Oh, what is that place called? The Green Awning. It's around the block from Janie's. I know. The tamale guy comes in real late.

Oh, it's got all the caricatures on the wall of Chicago. Old Town Ale House. Old Town Ale House. That's it. One of the greatest dive bars of all time. Great place. Well, Dane did an episode there, too. The nude photo, paintings.

Yes, yes. And it's like Trump and Bill Murray and John Candy. It's all these Chicago legends in there. It's fucking great. Yeah, I remember whenever I was there, I'd be working with Adam Burke. Yeah. Really funny Irish guy, and we worked and we'd get fucking housed there. And it's not expensive.

It feels divey. The chairs are creaky. The floors are sticky. It's the best bar. And that was Ebert's spot. That was Ebert's spot! Tell me about the doc. Oh, it's great. I mean, it just kind of chronicles the whole show. he was a writer at the sun and he just worked his way up and then he fell in love with movies and he was

became the movie critic and then he got the show with siskel they hated each other they go all into that they got behind the scenes stuff where they're like cut yeah fuck you don't ever talk to me like that again fuck you you fat piece of shit he's like all right whatever you suck you're a hack and then you're like whoa they show all that and then uh cisco was kind of a uh a badass by the way outside the show yeah he was like at the playboy mansion big big coke guy yeah weird fun you wouldn't know it he looked like some dweeb poindexter guy with the suit on but but they end up being friends in the end or what they end up being friends in the end and they i guess both got cancer crazy well e Well, Siskel and Ebert, great cameo.

I think one of the most underrated shows of all time. Every episode is on YouTube. Yes. If you haven't seen it, The Critic. Yes. So funny. James L. Brooks, and I think it was Mike Reese and Al Jean from The Simpsons. The Simpsons guys, yeah.

But it's two seasons, and it's one of the best pilots for a show ever. It's brilliant. Yeah. Just killer. It was too smart, I think, for the... Because everybody's like, oh, I love The Simpsons, but this I don't get because it's all references. Fucking John Lovitz, dude. Killed it.

Just gold. Yeah, so good. It stinks. That show deserved more. So it's on YouTube if you haven't seen it. You know what? Fuck it. That's my rec this week.

Watch the pilot on YouTube. Ooh, good one. It's on youtube if you haven't seen it you know what fuck it that's my rec this week watch the pilot on youtube oh good one it's on youtube it is one of the most perfect pilots because you get who everyone it there's a duke phillips character yeah who's he's the boss he's this rich ripped asshole yeah but he's it's almost like if you like jack donaghy on 30 rock alec baldwin's character you'll like this is like this character before that. Right, right. But he's like a southern boy. Yeah, yeah. And it opens, this is how he's introduced. A woman walks up to him, she's a reporter,

she goes, Duke Phillips, you're a captain of industry. You're incredibly wealthy. You were great in bed last night. That's how it opens. And he just goes, I have no one to envy. I envy other people having me to envy. Name a better way to introduce a character. Killer, killer.

John Loves was great. They'd make fun of everybody on the show, all the actors. Yeah. It was so good. So of its time, too. So 90s. Great show. And there's a Cisco and Ebert episode in season two.

Yeah. It's pretty fun, but like, God damn it. It was almost like Family Guy before Family Guy. They did so many cutaways. A lot of cutaways. That's so true. And it was darker and it felt a little more adult than other cartoons. And they shit on movies.

Yes. If you like movies, you'll like that. There's like a Marlon Brando thing. Yeah. Orson Welles. Orson Welles. The fish sticks. Yeah.

The fish sticks. So good. Fuck. I don't know if younger people will even get the show because it's so many old references but that was back when movies were like part of the zeitgeist it was part of the world like you'd go back to school on monday be like you saw jurassic park oh my god you know that was all part of the world now now it's like oh yeah what was that is that on hulu i don't know i don't have hulu and it's all different

now it felt we were more i don't know we were more together as Hulu, and it's all different now. It felt we were more, I don't know, we were more together as a country, I think, a little more. But now we're all splintered. It was like, you got your podcast. You listen to that. I'm reading this book. What channel is that on? Oh, I don't have Apple TV. Everybody's got their own thing now.

Yeah, it's funny. I was just in the Apple store, and it's like that morning show thing. I'm like, oh, this show looks good. I'm like, will I ever watch it? Probably not. Probably not. It looks good. This looks like a good show.

Yeah. It's supposed to be about Matt Lauer, right? That type of vibe. Steve Carell's missing Matt Lauer. Oh, yeah, that's right. I bet this is a good show. That does sound good. Never gonna watch it.

Probably never gonna watch it, but multiple people have told, Hanley just told me it was good. Okay. I hear Ted Lasso's amazing. I'll probably never watch that. The problem with Apple is they have like six shows. They're like, subscribe,

and you're like, you've heard of Netflix netflix hbo amazon and hulu right they have more than six right you gotta build a catalog here at least buy some get family ties on there just so you can have more shit jesus that's why youtube is always the number one for me it's like the critic larry sanders i can watch every cisco and ebert ever on youtube it's amazing yeah yeah the cisco and ebert's are cool. I remember watching one. I would watch a lot of them. I love their Midnight.

They do a great review of Midnight Run, but I remember when Casino came out. Yes. Siskel shits all over it. Yes. And Ebert's like, are you out of your mind? Like, name 10 better movies in this. I know.

And you can't even give us a good review. He pulls off the whole, well, it's Goodfellas again. It's a little bit too similar. And you're like, I know, but it's still good. still good yeah it's funny i remember dating someone and i showed we saw the irishman first yeah that was the only scorsese movie she'd seen oh right yeah so then i think irishman is pretty good yeah i like it i like it but compared to his other shit yeah but then she's a good fellow she's like oh this is good i'm like yeah right then she saw Goodfellas. She's like, oh, this is good. And I'm like, yeah. Right. But then she saw Casino. She's like, I can't do it. And she's like, it's all the same movie.

It's so not true. It's just the similar actors and the similar cuts. The voiceover and the movie. Yeah, good point. It's like, doo, doo, doo, doo. Yeah. Doo, doo, doo, doo. Earth, Angel.

Yeah, a lot of Motown. And then ever since Tommy was a Goodfellas. Yeah. That's like four movies. And then, you know, ever since Tommy was a good fella. Yeah. That's like four movies. Good point, good point. Ever since, I still love them all, but you can't deny the similarity. Right. What do you think?

So, Scorsese, do you like when he would do weird movies? Like, do you like After Hours? I love After Hours. How about King of Comedy? Love King of Comedy. Same. I love them both. Yeah, I like any movie that has some some

style to it like it has a vision to it you know which i don't really think you see anymore there's so much marvel shit we keep we always go back to movies in this pod well we love movies yeah this is like this is like an unofficial movie pod but that's cool i mean we talk about a ton of other shit yes but like we're we're observational comics we love movies we love comedy it's gonna come back to that but i know i remember salakius was telling me like you were talking you've talked about this you were doing a new orleans after hours style yes you need to do i could see you being that type of character where you're out all night in new orleans and it's a wacky i could see horrible shit happening to you where you're like the kind of buster keaton type of care where you're like you can't control

the craziness going around you and you're kind of like the the bad shit happens to you and you're like the kind of Buster Keaton type of character where you're like you can't control the craziness going around you and you're kind of like the the bad shit happens to you and you just have to deal with it yeah yeah yeah totally and that's what the guy the guy was watching after hours he's a fan of my comedy he's like this is a movie and he just called me I didn't know who he was and I was like I like it are you doing it we're gonna do it yeah we found two guys to write it they love the idea and they're writing it right now. Damn. Yeah, that's a great idea. Who knows if we'll ever sell it, but it's a work in progress.

You know how it goes. We got to make our own shit, man. Yeah, we got to get creative. We got to hustle, and it's a little exhausting, but it's worth it. We're drunk, but honestly, man, I'm so happy. I'm seriously just getting back on the road road and I'm so happy to be back. It's great to be back, isn't it? You feel like you have purpose again.

You're like, oh, this is what I'm supposed to be doing. I just don't know how to write without torturing myself like this because I think the thing is if I don't force myself to do this many sets, I'm not going to hate myself for not having enough new shit, and I'm not going to just have it. Yeah. I need to fall ass backwards in the jokes, dude. Yeah, same. That's the weird thing about creativity is you can't really force. You can force getting a joke to be better and rewriting and tweaking, but you can't force an idea.

Yeah. An idea has got to just hit you when it hits you. The worlds have to, to the stars have to align you're in the shower you're like that's it it's about the midget you know and then it all comes together and but you can't really force it you're like ray leone and goodfellas the midget the midget what does he say karen no what's he he's saying so they pulled the heist off the lufthansa yeah yeah true heist off. The Lufthansa. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. True heist, by the way. Do you think...

Yeah, it's weird how much jokes hit me in the shower, and I think it's because it's one of the last places we don't have access to our phone. I think it's so true. Once the phone's become fully waterproof, it's over. Oh, God. Don't even tell me that. I've already put my phone on the side of the wall

and play a podcast while I shower. Really? I'm like, God, I'm an addict. Yeah, it's bad. I'll do music sometimes. I can't do. I'll do jazz sometimes. I can't do words right now unless I need a pump up.

I need a boost and I'm about to do a show. Yeah, jazz is the best. I'll tell you another band. Here's a rec for you. Sales. That's the name of a band. Sales. S-A-L-E-e-s great just chill music not high energy not too low

but just like great background hangout kind of loungy music it's almost jazzy but but a little more poppy rocky it's great i'm gonna listen to Check out sales. If you want some low key, just chill music. I'm pumped. I want to hear it. Listen to Oscar Peterson, too, from last week. Oh, yeah. I got to check that out. If you like Brubeck, you'll like him. I'll do an Oscar Peterson. I'm a big Pandora guy, so I got all my stations.

I haven't done Pandora forever. I'm old school. I like Pandora. I stick with it. I hate the ads, but I like that it mixes it up a little. Just pay, what is it, like $2 a month? No. Is it? It's got to be $10.

Is that breaking your bank? Well, I don't want to get a credit card out, fill it in. Oh, you got the QR code wrong or the CVR or whatever, the back. I don't know. I'm horrible at filling anything out. I feel like this is going to take you less than a minute. Everybody says that. It's kind of like a cooking show.

They go, oh, it's so easy to make a quiche. You can make this in 10 minutes. And I'm like, I crack an egg. It lands on my foot. The oven doesn't work. The paprika goes everywhere. It's never easy. Is this?

Yeah, I don't know, man. I tried to sign up for Robin Hood. They're like, we're gonna process your shit. That's the stocks, the app, the stock app. Oh, right, right, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, I'm going to buy some crypto. I'm going to get some Dogecoin and take over the world. And 20 minutes later, I'm like, I need a bank statement.

Is this a bank statement? No, that's my social security. Life is exhausting. It's exhausting. Then you forget the password, and it's a nightmare. We're so, like, you're like me in that anytime you're not doing something comedy related or working on stand-up, you feel like you're wasting time. I'm wasting time, and I'm not good at it.

I'm the same way. If I'm not working on a bit or working on something that is joke related, I'm annoyed. I'm the same way. That's why I tweet so much because I'm like, all right, this counts as a joke, and I feel I just kind of relax for a second. It's a horrible way to live, but I guess it creates work. Yeah, we're broken.

Yeah. Anyway. That's why the ladies hate us. We produce fun work, but... Should we do emails? Oh, yeah, we'll do an email. This is basically the Patreon. You email us.

We read them. We comment. We riff. We comment. We riff. We chat. We chop it up. Send us your peeves, your wrecks, your drinks, anything you got. We have so many. Yeah, we should wrap it up soon.

Okay, peeve from Corey Reeves. I like it. Ooh, good rhyme. That's a segment. When two people sit on the same side of the booth at a restaurant and singing happy birthday to an adult at a restaurant. I'm okay with the booth. I'm okay with the booth. It's your booth.

Here, here. It's your booth. Yeah, I'm fine with it. I'm definitely fine with the booth sitting, but I... Here's where I go... I've been drinking. Here's where I go with the birthday thing. I prefer a man... I like a guy,

the exact correlation to how much I like a guy is to how much he celebrates his birthday. That's a good point. If a guy's like all over his birthday, hey, it's my birthday coming up. We gotta go crazy. We gotta do this. I'm like, you're dead to me.

If a guy's like, you know, it's my birthday today. I'm like, I love you. And also if it's like a birthday where you're like, hey, let's just get like a dude, like lunch with four people. That's like a great birthday. Why would you like a 30 person birthday? So true.

I've never been a big, people that celebrate their birthday. You know what though? We're also, we get a lot of attention. Good point. I mean, it's the same reason that you and I never want a big wedding. Hate a big wedding. It's the same reason we don't want a big birthday. We get enough. I mean, we do stand up every night it's kind of

like people are applauding and birthdays are gonna stress us out way more than a show oh people like i'm here and we're like fuck all right i gotta deal with this over here this guy's from summer camp this guy's from school this guy's a comedian i gotta work on all three you just work in a room you're like kill me it's a nightmare i never want a big birthday great point there's an episode of seinfeld where they're all in jerry's apartment and kramer's like oh birthdays are the worst you got to talk to everybody all your friends are there that you don't even like and jerry goes yeah every day is my birthday because they're all in his house it's a great joke but yeah it's so true birthdays are hell and we get a ton of attention and i was always like why do people like a big wedding it's a nightmare it's always

some bridezilla. Her hair's on fire. She's running around. They never look happy at the wedding. They never look happy. They're happy for the first hour. Yes. Because they're married.

Have you seen them by the end of the night? They're just like, get me out of here. I know. It's like a fucking hostage video. I know. And then they always end up in like the office of the building

and they're like, oh, I need a minute. I'm like, that's my whole life. You in that office. That's your next special title. I need a minute. Hey, that's not bad. That's not bad, I need a minute. I'm like, that's my whole life. You in that office. That's your next special title. I need a minute. Hey, that's not bad. That's not bad.

I need a minute. The 59 of them are horrible. I need one good one. But yeah. Oh, I had a point. Yeah, the birthday thing. If you celebrate your birthday too much. It's another good title.

What? I had a point. I had a point. I lost it. But yeah, the birthday guy who needs to celebrate his birthday. I'm like, come on, man. You're right. It's a small gathering.

Let's get lunch. Let's hang out. It's my birthday week. Ooh, that's a red flag. Eat the fattest part of my ass. It's my birthday. Let me come up with seven excuses real quick. It's your birthday week.

Shut up. What do you think about a destination wedding? I mean, it's- I'll never. I mean- It's your birthday week. Shut up. What do you think about a destination wedding? I mean, it's- I'll never, I mean- It's crazy. By the way, it's a destination wedding if I have to buy a plane ticket. I don't care.

If you live in another state, it's still a destination. I still have to travel. That's a great point. But if you do it in like, we're getting married in Rome. I'm like, oh, cool. Go fuck yourself.

I'm happy to lose this friendship. Right, Bronx. Unless you don't mind if I don't go. If they don't mind. I mean, look, that's your wedding. That's your day. If you want to be an extravagant twat. Yes.

Enjoy it. Yes. The both of you. Extravagant twat. Great special. But yeah, I'm with you. Rome. Rome.

Like, also, no gift. The flight was a gift. Yeah. I can't bring you a, you know know a charcuterie plate or whatever the hell a mixer you know or a blender i went to rome yeah that's it how about your toaster i'm gonna throw it in your tub overnight it's a restoration hardware you're gonna like it for two seconds while you roast uh yeah i hate hate oh i hate it all i mean i feel like it's been done to death but i really hate a destination wedding yeah but i mean i feel like it's been done to death but i really

hate a destination wedding yeah but you're right though people don't ever get that attention so this is their moment this is their special but then it's funny it's like the way we get smothered when we're at a show and we're like fuck here that you could see it turn for them where they're like this was going to be great and then there is a moment at that wedding where they're all like fuck this is annoying oh yeah like imagine if you did a show and like it's annoying already the groups of friends you have to like kind of divvy up and figure out to make work right there's always that friend that you kind of have to look after yeah there's some friends that come out and you can kind of be like all right well they can figure it out they can

they're charming they can shoot the shit they could work a room but there's one friend who like just hangs on your arm like fuck i You're like, fuck, I'm babysitting now, too. This is crazy. And then add your grandmother and aunt and then your whatever, your partner's family to that. It's way harder. Way harder. And I'll throw this out there.

And this is going to rustle some feathers. But Russell? Russell. Russell. Thank you. Russell Crowe. feathers but russell ruffle thank you russell crow ruffle feathers is uh the people who we talk about how i much i hate people coming late people who come early is also bad yeah like the guy i had a video shoot last week and my friend i said he's like i'll be at your house by 9 a.m

so i said all right 9 a.m it's pretty, but we got to do the shoot. I get it. We're starting early. Going to get ahead of it. Calls me at 8, 10. Oh, my God. I'm in your neighborhood. I'm like, ah, those 50 minutes are so precious. I need, it's 8 in the morning.

I need every minute. I got to milk it. You said 9 a.m. I planned on 9 a.m., and I told him that. He was like, I get it. You said 9 a.m. So I, poor guy, had to walk around and get a bagel, but. Poor guy.

Should have planned his time better. I know. You killed me. You're the poor guy. Thank you. I appreciate that. You're a.m. so I poor guy to walk around and get a bagel but poor guy should have planned his time better I know you're the poor guy thank you I appreciate that you're a good friend get a fucking oatmeal motherfucker yeah yeah get an orange juice and a coffee I got 50 minutes and I'm gonna meditate were you ever to fall back asleep no god no I can't fall back asleep my sleep schedule is a disaster same same I slept till 10 today and that was like a miracle. I either wake up at like 8.45 or noon. There's no middle ground. It's gotten dark. Well, the booze doesn't help the sleep cycle.

Booze is horrible for sleeping. It's bad for most things. And melatonin and you're like, I just had a dream I was getting stabbed by like a bunch of little monkeys. Like this can't be healthy. They're just like stabbing you. You're like, ugh.

And then you wake up and you're like, that was three hours, I think. That was rough. You know what that means? Your mom is smothering you. You know you love the guy with the dream book? Oh, yeah. I had a bit I was working on about this. Oh, really?

It hit Monday. It hadn't been hitting. But it was about how... Did I ever tell you this joke? Mm-mm. Fuck. We got to do a bit. Jesus. Maybe that's the the one i'll do i wonder if i've done it on here um let me look i love facial recognition by the way that saves me all the passwords just the face i'm like thank god isn't it nice i don't i i just do the finger i don't know, the finger's good too. That sounds weird.

It does sound weird. Yeah, this was, I had a dream about dead rodents. And I looked what up. I might have done this on the pod before. I've never heard it. But you're also a drunk. True. I looked it up.

It said, could signify new beginnings. That's what dead rodents could be. I'm like, cool. Could we get a different delivery system? Right, right. I just had a dream about babies getting stabbed in the face you're like oh romantic possibilities await that's great have i done that on this harry i've never heard it good that's funny i'll bring it back i was gonna drop it i'm i glided at will city winery show on monday and i was not doing great in that head i'm like all right we got him back that's one good thing about

doing a lot of sets you're like let me try this super old bit that was kind of shaky, and then boom, you fix it. Boom. Is this anything? So, excuse me, I was doing a bunch of racial material at a show, and this black guy yelled out. He goes, you're white. What do you know about racism?

And I riffed. I was like, well, I think we're the best at it. And it hit. I got a huge laugh. What's that? We invented it? Yeah, like we're the best at it. I'm an expert.

What are you talking about? Like, which one is it? Are we racist or are we not knowing anything about racism? So I see his point, obviously, but I thought it could be a fun joke. Like, what do you know about racism? Well, I think we're the best. What do I know? I'm an expert. What did Michael Jordan knowordan know about basketball right i don't know seemed like

he kept winning at it yeah yeah exactly not that i like michael jordan i mean he's black but but yeah um could be something there racism yeah there's something funny about this bit i hope so we uh we invented yeah, we're the best at it. Yeah, we're like sous chefs. We're going, hmm, it's like wine. It's the only thing where you're also trying to not do it, but you know that you guys are, hmm. It's an interesting joke because it's teetering on a couple different things.

It's like if a chef's trying not to cook something and he kept doing it. Right, right, yeah, yeah. We're great at, it's almost like Rambo or something like that where you've got to come back out there. You're the best, man, you're the best. We're like, no, I shouldn't, I shouldn't. No, you're great at this,

where they have to pull the commando out of the log cabin in the woods because he's too good. We need you. There's got to be something about getting rid of it, though. Hey, you're trying not to do it. Maybe other people are doing it because you don't want to make it about you.

It's almost like you're a chef and that's the brunch menu. We're not proud of this, but this is our oh this is kind of our leftovers oh interesting this is leftovers from yeah yeah it's like leftover from the other generation you know you kind of right maybe make it about like past generations we're trying to get rid we're trying to ease we're trying to wean off this but we still need to get we still need to get customers yeah no no maybe it's it's kind of too i mentioned this last week like frank abagnale is great at check fraud but he's like i'm trying to stop they're like yeah but the fbi wants you so like i could go in and help

you know in a way like i'm good at this horrible thing which is immoral but but you're not good at being racist like that's true you don't want to make it like that i think is the flaw with the premise like you don't be like you're not a racist guy no so so i think you you don't make that part of the bit i think it's got to be like like i'm good at it and everyone's like what right right it's got to be like um hmm yeah it's it's it's tough because we're we're the best white people are the best at racism i would tough because we're the best. White people are the best at racism. I would say historically we're the best. I don't want to make it about now.

Aha, that's good. Historically, we're the best at it. I mean, check the history books. Yeah, we're working on it. Right, right. There's a lot of documentation of us killing it. What's something we're working on? Think about what we're working on.

What are we working on? Climate change? It's kind of like obesity. We're doing our best, but every once in a while you see a guy and you're like, that ain't good. Right.

The only problem is no one ever says- Either way, it's in Florida. That's not a bad tag. All right, I'll noodle, but historically is a good, historically is a good way to go with it. Something there. I wouldn't make it about you is my only thing, because you're not

racist, so don't make yourself the butt of the joke just for the joke. It's not true. Sure. I think there's something here, though, for sure. Yeah, but I am white. What do white people know about racism? I don't know. Have you read a history book? Uh-huh. We know a lot. Yeah, it's one of the rare jokes. We don't know. Have you read a history book? Uh-huh. We know a lot.

Yeah, it's one of the rare jokes. We don't know a lot about receiving it. Right, right. Oh, that's good. We're like pitchers, and everyone else is like catchers. Right. We're throwing heat. Yeah, we're batting 100 or 1,000. Yeah, no, that's good.

It's one of the few jokes where you don't want to make it personal. Most jokes are better when they're personal. No, this is an observational joke. Definitely observational. Make sure to email us. We might be drunkpod at gmail.com. Leave us a review on Apple. See Mark and myself on the road.

I think it's coming out later. So I just came out of Cleveland, I guess. This came out. See me in spokane seattle added shows uh salt lake uh lancaster pennsylvania arlington virginia uh fuck all over man i got a lot of dates coming up raleigh go to samuel.com slash shows there's a lot of dates added just added um just added atl Atlanta for later this year and just added Columbus as well. So adding dates, but

go see me. And Mark, where are you going to be, man? Hell yeah. That's some good cities you're going to. I'm going to be at McGuby's in Baltimore. Come out to that. Lord knows I need you. That could be a tough room. Hartford, Funny Bone. No, no, no. It's a good room. Okay. Well, that's a tough one. Hartford stuff.

Virginia Beach. I've never been to in my life. That could be interesting. Helium in Portland, that'll be fun. I love Portland. I'll be there in August. I can't wait. I got family and friends there. I can't wait.

Great town. Syracuse, Toledo, oh boy. Don't kill yourself in Syracuse. Suicide capital of the world. Yeah, Houston, Helium in Philly, and Buffalo. Woo, Dayton. I'm visiting like the Ironworks Union here. I'm going to all the blue-collar towns here.

I'm doing all these rooms too. I'm doing Helium, Philly, and Buffalo too, but later in September and December, I think. Oh, there you go. Oh, man, I'm in the Bray Improv. That'll be a treat. Is that great? Oh, it's Orange County.

It's just beach and beautiful people. Then you're like, why are you laughing? You guys have everything. You're gorgeous. Am I crazy to, so it's like Soho House? No, no, but they're good. They laugh. Is it weird?

I'm going, I'm on the road like every weekend this year, pretty much. Is that a mistake? Or am I going crazy on the road? Should I take- Wait, wait, the whole year? Pretty much. Till Christmas?

I think I'm close to being out every weekend of the i've like maybe four weekends open through the end of the year i would hold off on those just to just to stay sane i mean i i don't go i'm not going the whole you know i got a vacation at one point playing with the lady and you want to be able to go to a wedding if it pops up i don't know that you want to go to a wedding after this fucking rant you just said i don't want to go but i'm gonna i you know i got i got a friend getting married and he already asked me like please block this off it's in august so i blocked it off i know it's a nightmare i'm already dreading it it's five months away but i'll go he asked me directly you'll be miserable the whole time of course of course that's what they're at when you when you asked a comic to go to your wedding, you were saying,

do you mind being miserable? And that's what I say to him about getting married. But it's in Boston. I'll suck it up. Whatever. It's one night out of my life. One night. It's nothing. Yeah, and it's important to him and the wife. You need to go.

I get it. For your good friends. If it's a good friend. It's a good friend. So I'll be there. But yeah. Other than that, I mean, maybe I'd say okay. But I think about like

September, October, you're going to get a little burnt. I'm going to get burnt. But I also am like, it's hard to say no, man. It is. It is. It's been a rough year.

It's hard to say no to shit. Totally. And we got a lot in the tank. We got to get it out, but it's good money, and it's, I don't know. I don't mind the road, but. I like it too, but we're not like everybody else in that way. That's true, that's true.

We're drifters. We're married to the sea, as they say. Married to the sea. Yeah. That's what Joe listed about us, right? I know, yeah. That we're married to the sea, as they say. Married to the sea. Yeah. That's what Joe listed about us, right? I know, yeah. That we're married to the sea. He nailed it when he said that.

I was like, oh, man, that hurts so good. You're right. There's a couple married to the sea guys out there, and they don't seem happy. But as long as we keep an eye on it. It's like drinking. Don't think we'll keep an eye on any of it. We'll keep an eye on you.

Thanks for listening, guys. Hear, hear. See you next week.