We Might Be Drunk - Ep 58: Lagavulin with Jim Gaffigan

Episode Date: January 17, 2022

Ladies and Gentleman, Jim Gaffigan! Check out Jim's Netflix special Comedy Monster! Support the show and get 10% off your first month of online therapy at BetterHelp.com/Drunk Support the show and get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code DRUNK at SheathUnderwear.com Mark Normand and Sam Morril can be seen on the road at a club near you. Visit MarkNormandComedy.com and SamMorril.com for more details! Join the Patreon for bonus episodes weekly and more bonus content: Patreon.com/WeMightBeDrunkPod Send us emails [e-mail] Send us mail: Gotham Podcast Studio 39 West 38th Street, 10th Fl New York, NY 10018    Don't miss  @jimgaffigan   @Sam Morril  and  @mark normand  on the road or on your TV.

We might be drunk, we might be drunk, as long as we are hanging out, you know we might be drunk. Raise a glass, let's talk shit, pep heaps, wrecks, and a bit, maybe drunk. We might be drunk, yeah. Welcome to the Comedians Inspired by Jerry Seinfeld and Dave Attell. I'm your co-host. Wait, which one's which? Jim Gaffigan. I don't know.

Comedy. Anyway, the more robotic is more like Seinfeld. And then the self-loathing that is, you know, it's going to be really interesting to see what you guys look like when you grow up. Because it's going to, there's going to be, you're at this point, Jim, should I let you guys talk? I'm 38, so it's not like I'm young. You don't look a day over 37.

I'll take it. No, but like, there is going to be a point where in your comedy generation, take it, I'm 74, and there's going to be a point where in your comedy generation, take it, I'm 74, and there's going to be a point where you guys go off the rails. You know what I mean? Maybe it's not YouTube, but maybe it's someone where you're like, that guy or that gal was completely normal and now they're bonkers. Oh, yeah.

There's a lot of that now. COVID revealed a lot of that, as you said in your special, right? Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of crazy out there COVID revealed a lot of that, as you said in your special, right? Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of crazy out there. Yeah. Yeah, and it's getting wackier. I think the social media, the staying at home and just reading horrible shit all day, it

changes a person. Yeah. It's crazy. Anyway, that's the episode. All right. Well, we should introduce the show. One of our favorite comics. Thank you for coming.

Coming straight from The View, Jim Gaffigan. Well, I went to The View, then I got my booster. Wow. Which, I mean, obviously, it's all, you know, fake anyway. But, no, I got my booster. So they were like, can you hang here for 15 minutes? And I'm like, yeah. And so then I just left.

Because you know why? Because I don't pay attention to rules. Hell yeah. You're a rebel. And then I fainted in the cab and I was raped, which was really bad. That's why you got to go Uber. So what are you guys drinking? And what are you trying to make up for?

Lost time. So much. Drinking Lagavulin, peaty, nice scotch. It's a special scotch the sign for this special car for a special guest we do the same thing with alcohol oh you do a different a different drink oh we've been mai tai eggnog bourbon you name it every week so how do you decide like do you guys know about booze you know about different boozes we know a little and how much to have there's a little bit of an old soul in both of you guys you do i think

yeah even when i am old no when you were young too when you were young i mean you're like yeah i was an old joke guy you're i mean i remember your first half hour on comedy central and i was like this is a joke guy huge yeah now i heard something weird about you and tell me if i'm wrong um you wanted to be love it you wanted to be a tellish and then you end up being reganish and gerald wanted to be reganish you wanted to tell us you and you know like how you guys are lovers gerald and i were lovers ah and uh no you have these comedy kind of and i know that there's other people in your group so i don't want to alienate them but but uh gerald really wanted to be like Regan.

And I really wanted to be like a tell. And there was kind of this shift that occurred. And, you know, he ended up doing the roasts. And, you know, some of it is like it's you find different levels of authenticity. Right. And it depends how it changes and how your heart's broken. Yeah, I mean, I think Bill Burr was clean as a whistle in the beginning. Was he?

Billy Burr, yeah. Well, I knew him as Billy Burr, which is really interesting. There was something of like, I don't know if you've known anyone that's kind of had a gender change, where you're like, now they're they you know and so like like bill billy was a little bit of that oh really it was like i had to catch myself out of respect you know what i mean right now he's this massive powerhouse huge yeah he totally found himself yeah but now he's going through all this therapy and he's taking shrooms. Everybody's finding themselves and changing.

I feel like every comic seems to be in therapy right now. Oh, yeah. But haven't they all? You know what's weird? It's like you guys are drinking. I feel as though. This is therapy. There was less drinkers.

I mean, there was always like a tell. you always hear about the coke and the hotels and the hook yeah i mean but i'm talking about like i'm not talking about like way back i'm talking about you know because in my generation or whatever uh you know like like giraldo and i would get wasted but like and a tell would drink but like louis didn't drink potberry you know like i'm not saying they didn't drink at all kevin brennan mark maron and it was or it just wasn't in the open like the weird thing is is like uh in this what we do you're like you're performing in a bar yeah essentially whether it's a club or not and you're like this is a sweet setup for after the show i don't know if it's still like that in clubs where you're like show's over you got free booze here let's hang out right yeah i think that's why

i became a comic i was like 18 i was like free free bar. Yeah, of course. No one's IDing me. We got paid in drink tickets. Yeah. It was just pushing the addiction. But now every comic's like yoga-ing, therapy-ing, kaling. It's all about like Neil Brennan goes on these retreats where he finds his dad or whatever. It's crazy stuff. Yeah, that's pretty interesting. Well, it's this journey, right?

We're always, it's like but for comedians we're just looking for material do you know what i mean it's like oh maybe i should maybe that inner child has some jokes i could use yeah do you know what i mean that's why i'm having kids you're like i mean we're obviously inspired by you say like sign phone to tell but we're inspired by guys like you too because you're so observational. Like, I just watched your new special. It's hilarious. Oh, thanks. But I'm like, how many minutes did he have on bikers that was untouched?

Like, how the fuck did he hit that? I know. You're going to run out of stuff. You milked the shit out of everything. Oh, well, thank you. You know, it's like, but as you guys know, you feel like, you're like, well, that might be it. Yes.

As you guys know, you feel like, you're like, well, that might be it. Yes. And then there is, you know, necessity is the mother of invention, right? Right. Is that even the quote? I think you got it. I kind of sounded smart. I kind of sounded smart. Who's the smartest here?

Is it, or one of you is like a closet smart person? Not me. Not you? Maybe. Wait a minute, you grew up in New York City. You're a reader. You're well-read. You're Jewish. But I say a lot of dumb minute. You grew up in New York City. You're a reader. You're well-read. You're Jewish.

But I say a lot of dumb stuff. We always defer to the Jewish person. He's Jewish. He's smart. Yeah. It's like the gay person being creative. All right. We're just going to have to say that.

Yeah. The black guy's athletic. The Jews are. You got an accounting degree. I assume. No. That was. That was.

By the way, that you sounded more anti-Semitic than I did. He said he hated bagels less. I thought you were Jewish. You're not Jewish? I wish. I think that like all comedians, because it has such a rich history in Borscht Belt, I think all Gentile comedians secretly want to be Jewish. I think so too.

Yeah. And, you know, us honkies're you at least have a little flavor a little culture you know you're on a farm i'm just thinking i guess i don't know i don't just look like i'm on a farm but your your family owned slaves that's true still yeah still owned slave i know so your family you're from new orleans oh yeah born and raised. Your family manufactured Confederate statues, which I think is really weird. Yeah, yeah. You guys suppressed poor white people, too. Big time.

Yeah. And is your family from New Orleans or are you guys carpetbaggers? They're scallywags and turncoats. No, they're from there. They're from there? Wow. And Katrina came and they won't leave. They just won't? Wow. And Katrina came, and they won't leave. They just won't go away.

So they're staying. And are you Cajun? Are you like Theo Vaughn? No. Are you related to Theo? Are you Theo Vaughn's dad? He's my brother. No.

His dad was 80. That's true. I remember that. I remember that. Yeah, I remember you had material about that. Yeah, but New Orleans is not that weird. I mean, if you go, it's like a little city, but then you go 10 minutes outside of it, and you're in the Hootenanny.

It's crazy. It's toothless. It's camo. But that's New York, too. Go 20 minutes outside the city and you're like, what the hell? But you grew up, Sam, you grew up in the city. In the city. Yeah.

The rough and tumble city. Did you go to Bronx Science or something like that? No, we've talked about it. It's Browning. Really? Oh, yeah, Browning. See, come on. That's smart.

That's smart that's smart rough and tumble you grew up in chelsea and then and then upper east yeah isn't that amazing it's like i think it's amazing how like you have conversations have you ever had this with comedians where you're like you're like yeah we drove to pittsburgh do you remember that and you're like yeah like you should remember an eight hour drive and you had a great conversation you did a show you had a meal you got drunk drove back and you don't remember any of it all right what's your favorite city to perform in i mean i love it's it also depends on the club yeah i mean i love i was gonna say comedy on state because of that that club is and you you love the owner's daughters.

You're very inappropriate. You wanted to get all Chris Noth on them. Chris Noth is a friend of mine. I don't know what to say. Ah, Peloton. That's tough. So that's a great club. Yeah, I'd perform there. That's a great club. That's classic.

Great little town, too. Madison's underrated. City is big. Chicago is just always awesome. Acme in Minneapolis is good. How's the DC Improv? The DC Improv was my favorite club. I've never done a weekend there. What?

Yeah, great room. Low ceiling, tight. I love a club in the heart of the city, like Philly Helium, right there in the city. I hate when you got to, I just did the Milwaukee Improv. Shout out. Great club. Milwaukee has an improv. Just open.

Oh, in August. And it's a good club. Staff was great in the third ward or where is it? Oh, you wish it is in the 15th ward. It is out by, you know, I was in Kenosha. I was open for Rittenhouse. It's wild. Be killed.

It's way out there. What you did. Those clubs are like you've been a road guy for like how many years yeah you're 40 50 years me and joy diaz are out there um no i did a lot of uh road stuff actually initially when uh people were doing road gigs around. I only stayed in the city, but I didn't really get set. So it was kind of a, I would do Gladys' Comedy Club. Whoa. Where's that? That was at Hamburger Harry's.

Where's that? That was on 45th Street. Wow. Damn. And then where else did I perform? Gotham was the place that really let me go on. The 21st Street Gotham. Yes.

That was a cool room. That was a cool room. That felt like comedy in there. But I didn't really start touring until, like, I middled for a tell, like, when he would do the DC Improv. And, like, the DC Improv, and I'm sure it's still the great club was a great club it was like the wait staff was cool and um it was just you know like i feel like dc is one of those cities where people are over educated right and underpaid so they're like we can't do anything but go to a comedy show right i mean totally yeah yeah great town uh

opening for a tell yeah he was drinking i assume he was but you know like the weird thing is i used to i used to you know like the tell this is kind of goes back to what i said it's like there's these these aspects of these comedians that is it more mystique than anything do you want to hear my larger theory is that comedians are all an identity crisis every single one of us so in other words some of it is who we're told who we are yes by the audience and by other comedians it's just how we come across like i come across as very handsome no i come across as very white bread right very midwestern but the reality is i you know i grew up middle class uh you know i went to college but that's not to say that i'm not you know like the the white trash stuff it isn't far from me you know i mean it's like it is part

of who i am you know i did collect beer cans as a kid right so but the thing about a tell is that the the atel i knew and not that you ever really know comedians except for you guys have made love that you never really know comedians that well but attell was this workhorse oh yeah he was you know he might have a beard to unwind but he was not like shit-faced every night and he's a cute jewish guy from long island yeah but he comes out as this gruff kind of blue collar but he was yeah so he was like this brilliant jewish kid from great neck or whatever. It's like – but like the kind of like the Bowery boy thing was – I felt like it was – and I used to go, I'm like, you're like this smart kid from Long Island. And he's like, ah, you're just being nice.

Right, right. But like – but he became that in a way. Do you know what I mean? And that's also – I didn know, obviously he did struggle with drinking and obviously he smokes too much and stuff like that. But so I'm simplifying it and I don't know all the details, but it was. Well, you got to have a thing. When we were in D.C., yeah, like he would he would go out for a drink, but he was like the Attell I knew was like he would go out for a drink, but he was – like the Attell I knew was like he'd go – and even when he was writing things at Comedy Central, he would – I would be like, I'll help you out. I'll just hang around.

And he was very kind of – he would never stay in a place. Like he'd go to a bar. He'd be like, you want a beer? And I'm he'd go to a bar he'd be like you want a beer and i'm like uh sure and then he'd be like i'm gonna go and you didn't know it wasn't like he was being rude he's like a bodega cat you kind of yeah he's kind of here and then he's gone you know yes but like the one of the i mean i think one of the best comedic minds but also a really sweet guy yeah you know totally we love him he was not like uh you know like i mean i don't think i've ever seen him walk by a homeless person and not yeah yes money and there are a lot of them in the west village he is he is the only person still

carrying cash in the west village yeah he pulls out a wad i've also never seen him eat have you seen him once because i used to do the road with him a decent amount. I remember we pulled over driving back, and I saw him take like a sausage biscuit out of a gas station and take a big bite. I was like, man. I've never seen him eat. That's so funny. Have you? Yeah, we went to Keene's with him that time. You've seen him eat.

He had a burger. You've seen him eat. I don't know if he ate. It's rarely. I think he put it in his pocket and left. It's easy to me. It's rarely. I think he put it in his pocket and left.

But you guys know, and I don't know if you guys, but like, I tell there was a time when he would have, I'm not kidding, a new 20 minutes every night. It's unreal. Every night. And he would just, like, I remember the second time. So there was, back when Letterman was a big to do and obviously so like there's the and i i call them classes but generations like the class right above me and giraldo and trying to think of who else would be in there ian bag um bonnie mcfarlane uh they were just

like they would decimate and there were these people that were but they were the new comics getting all the spots or getting the the spots when someone would go out of town but like the reason i bring that up let me see if i can remember is that but he would have the this new material every night so when he did did Letterman, it was a big thing. I think that Todd Berry was the first one to do Letterman. Really? It ended up just working out that way. So all these guys were great.

Berry, Marin, Kevin Brennan. They were all of that same. And Louis. But Attell was the one that they there was a New York Times article that identified him as the new Mel Brooks. Whoa. He was on he was on this 30 under 30 30 artist list in the New York Times. wasn't this uh you know like the the journalism that that is focused on comedy obviously we know it's a bigger deal in the uk the journalism on comedy thing but like there was no journalism on comedy so they would the new yorker the new y York Times and the New Yorker, every two years would send someone out to follow a couple comedians.

And they would, you know, it would depend who they followed. So sometimes they would follow Attell or Sarah Silverman. And sometimes they would follow someone who really wasn't in the scene. follow someone who really wasn't in the scene. So like, you know, like when you read a review or an article about a comedian, you're like, this person doesn't know comedy. Yes. They're not even they're not even scraping the surface of what an audience responds to to this comedian.

They'll follow someone who's like an it kid or something, but they're not doing the work. Right. Or they'll even kind of. Or an actor. They're kind of, yeah, they're just like, oh, this is just somebody who pedals in tabloid stuff. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. But.

You could argue there's too much comedy journalism. Like, hey, relax. We got it. Right. Yeah, it is. Have you guys performed in the UK? Because the UK, it's in have you guys performed in the uk because the uk it's it's um it's kind of part of the fabric reviews and um they say that edinburgh the reviews are what get you

seats yeah it's very it's it's weird it's almost like the uk and obviously this changes all the time you know and i'm sure even in your time doing stand up it's changed you're like wow can you believe this club that used to be up here is now down here stand up new york it's no or like comic strip or just you know like comic strip is where i started so it is weird like to see it kind of do this you know know? I mean, and it just, it, it moves also with, uh, you know, the management of the club and also like how that club is run.

Like if it's not a true, uh, showcase, you know, if there's also just geography of where people live, you know, uh, it can change,

but you didn't have that with hbo remember hbo was the top tier you couldn't get any higher than hbo special yeah and i'm not saying hbo is nothing but it doesn't feel like the most eyeballs are there yeah comedy and by the way i remember like you know hbo was definitely the most prestigious thing but i remember i mean i was very fortunate because beyond the pale that was comedy central right that was comedy central and that was during this period where um dorm rooms so like when i went to college there was maybe something in the common area that had cable, but MTV was on. Yeah. But during the time Beyond the Pale premiered, that's when everyone had a TV in their room.

Everyone had Comedy Central on 24 hours a day. And so, like, people were kind of, you know, forced to be exposed to it. Right, right. Whereas now, I mean, I don't, you know, it's like, look, as a comedian, you want to be exposed right right whereas now i mean i don't you know it's like look as a comedian you want to be on comedy central you want to you know but it's it doesn't have the weight that it did god do you know i mean like there's all these swords and all these guys the weight of a youtube special you know you two guys did the YouTube specials that like there is that independence there. Oh, yeah.

And so you have to navigate your own path. And in some ways it's shifting. So like even if someone asked you like, hey, that YouTube special, how'd you do that? What would you do? It's like even in the year, it's probably shifted where you might be like, you know what? even in the year, it's probably shifted where you might be like, you know what? Now I would do this or that, or you're going to get some money here, or you're going to have to, you know, and you've got your Netflix special. So it's like it's this shifting thing.

But that's kind of, I mean, I'm glad to be back with Netflix. I'm dying to see how the numbers do because you don't know. You don't know. It's a gamble. I only got the Netflix because of the YouTube success. So then you're like, well, maybe I should just stay with YouTube. So it's this weird juggling act of you're like, I don't know what's more beneficial for my career. I mean, it's so fast.

A lot of people I really respect. I remember when I did the YouTube special, I talked to people who I really respect who were are like you're an idiot if you do this like you're done same who are like you can't ever give it away for free yeah so so that was but then also it's like what is a special but kind of a trailer for yourself on the road right so yeah i was kind of well i'm done with the material no one really made an offer this is kind of what you do i think i'm not doing this i'm doing this because i want to write new jokes you know so yeah yeah i think i think youtube has been it's the number one competitor to netflix which is incredible it's like it's not amazon it's not hbo for comedy at least it's so interesting because I had done a couple Comedy Central specials.

And, you know, you're also, you know, you want to, like, people think, oh, it's money. It's never money. It's about eyeballs. Yes. Is that, you know, the thing about, you know, like being new also is you only get to be new for a little bit. You got that right. Like, by the way, that's a scary reality where, oh, yeah, that's right. They only want to write articles about discovery. They don't want, I mean, unless you, you you know really kind of i mean i've

never been a tabloid guy anyway unless you do something outlandish or you're you know that'd be great for your next run you just start doing russell crowe level tabloid shit just like i'm just attacking some subset group and i'm like you can't deal with it but jim gaffigan's edgy trans chunk yeah but it's like it's weird how it's always shifting and that's the business side of it yeah and that's not necessarily again it's not about finance it's about creating opportunities so that you can continue to do it. Yes. Like you guys did that. I don't even, you don't even need to tell me. You did the YouTube thing so that you could get asses in seats at clubs so that those people could be like, you know what?

I saw this. They can easily share it. There is no paywall. I mean, by the way, when I did Amazon, and that's why I'm so excited to go back to Netflix, because when my last Netflix special was when they were releasing one every week. Yeah. And sometimes twice a week. It's a lot. And it would appear and it would disappear and so you could get some bump but like also uh you wouldn't get the impact like you know like i remember like i'm i i love nate bargazi but i

was like that bastard it's like his special came out in the middle of the pandemic oh yeah there was not much stuff out there so there's a lot of value yeah in when things land like aziz it's like even aziz is special it was brilliant because he was the first one that they owned so they had an interest in promoting it so it was like you know so there's so many other things there's some people think it's like one thing or another it's luck is such a big part of it it's not just yeah it's the strangeness of timing yeah it's like our business is all about timing but then there's a lot of timing you don't have control over yes but sometimes it's bittersweet because some people

put a youtube out too quick it's like you said you can only be young and new once so some people are like oh i can put out a youtube special or an album and they just do it and you're like you could have waited five years you'd be better off but it's too enticing exactly the demand for content has has hurt quality for sure for sure yeah yeah it is weird because there is something i mean i i changed, and this is like such classic comedy nerd talk that we would talk about if we were just hanging out anyway. I love it. And by the way, Seinfeld thinks I'm crazy, is that how long does it take to bake an hour? Oh, yeah. He's nuts about this. bake an hour oh yeah and he's but you know the the english or the british or the irish and the

australians they do an hour a year yeah now i think that's inherently wrong agreed but they all stink i don't want they all stink but i don't know you know it's like by the way it's a bit much look whether you liked it or not and i don't want to get down the rabbit hole of Hannah Gatsby, that special that popped. Nanette. Was her ninth. Is that right? And I'm like, so she did nine. And by the way, whether you think it's an artistic piece or super funny, super important from a socio standpoint, that was a pretty complete piece for her, let's say, eighth or ninth.

And so, like, there is something of, like, are we putting – and I'm saying this to two guys that can write. Like, to the people that can't write i'm like that's that you know that that's got to be frustrating but like you know we're also workhorses right yeah we are kind of the atel kind of like grind it out the joke is the hero the the facilitator is not as important as the material you know what i mean and so i just don't get how other people do it they go hey you're one of those joke guys i'm like what else is are we doing here i'm a comedian like it has to be jokes and you're telling the director you're in the scenes yeah right right i don't get it like what else would this is what it is you sing songs that's what

yeah so you just sit well the thing is is I think that I sometimes wonder about that too, is that. You can do stories, but they have to have jokes in them. You have to have jokes. Yes. And some of it is, it's all self-assignment. And we are always trying to evolve. You know, like when I look at like some of these fitness inspirational guys it's like i wish there were people like that just talking about comedy like you gotta come up with another

fucking hour you gotta do it you gotta challenge yourself you gotta wake up you gotta go i'm gonna i'm gonna freak myself out i'm gonna say something embarrassing you gotta go up there you gotta embarrass yourself because that's the only way you're going to grow. You're going to sit there and do food jokes for 10 years? Do that. Then you'll be a fat fucking ass. You got to get out there and you got to prove yourself. I dare you to do an act out.

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you'd work like small rooms and i and i'm really not blowing you here but like you would I would never see it weak really I was curious it's a good point where do you work out where's your where's like your open mic because I I would see your bars I'd be like this new stuff is already polished well that's very nice. But yeah, there is. That's all the wife. No. That's the good stuff. No, it's some of it is like I've been doing it for 70 years. But some of it is you. But you can never know 100% what's going to kill. Yeah, you never know. But like that's also, you know, it's the risk and the reward, right?

It's like that crypto also, you know, it's the risk and the reward, right? It's like that crypto ad, you know? It's like that people are so angry about. But like I do think there is, I don't know. I mean, because sometimes it's like also I think you guys would agree. Your writing has shifted completely. Like you bring up my wife. It's like there was a good five or six years where my wife and I, we were writing together regularly. I mean, we didn't have five kids or five kids in three different schools at the time.

So it's like you shift and it's like i didn't write on stage at that point and you know like writing on stage doing longer sets is really helpful so like during the pandemic i didn't really write that much i wish i would have but so when i'm doing longer sets and i also would say that when i tour and um you know during the day i'm not sitting there going let's meet for coffee i'm not doing that shit you know what i mean yeah i'm kind of like first of all i'm tired because i've eaten a steak at one in the morning but i'm listening and kind of like that's my writing time because when i'm home, I don't really have that much time. The road. I get a lot down the road.

Hotel rooms. I love it. I'm a mad scientist. I love the road. Yeah. Love the road. It's weird. People are like.

It's just getting there. That's it. And getting back. Yeah. Yeah. But there's something about the piece of the road and that you're kind of like, my life's back in New York. That's on hold.

This is all work. Yeah. And I bring a friend. I bring like Gary Veeder usually. that you're kind of like my life's back in new york that's on hold this is all work and i bring a friend i bring like gary veder usually so i have a guy just with me who wants to work on jokes and we can just bounce bits at lunch we go to our room and i i love the i love the road yeah i don't give a shit about the saint louis arch i'm writing today i've seen it yeah i mean there is like it's good to expose yourself to things, but it's also, you know, there is that that strange period where you're wasting time when you're writing that you have to put in. Yeah. Yeah.

You have to sit there like it would be embarrassing to explain how long it took to come up with a tag. I know. I know. I heard Garyman once say you build a special one sentence at a time and it's so true because you'll be on you'll do a five-day road stint and you're like i got that one one line and then you're happy with it you know you're like that worked that was progress it's weird and when there's a bad audience i always think it's so weird when or you're just not it's just not working and you're

and then a line just comes out and you're like wow yes never thought i'd get this line from you fucking people but it took their shittiness to bring it out yes yeah totally it's weird how a bad a good crowd can do the same because they're with you so hard you're like i'll throw in another line let's see well i think that's also a big advantage is the familiarity an audience has with your sensibility huge increases the intimacy so therefore you're it's a safer bet like i even think like do you remember when like um michelle uh wolf got so much shit for that White House correspondent thing. Like, I think that was a classic example of people didn't know her. Right, right. So, like, if they knew her, I mean, they couldn't look at it as a comedian.

Like, as a comedian, we're like, great writing, great performing, nailed it. Yeah. But, like, to these people, they're like, who is this person that, where if it was jeff ross they'd be like oh it's the roast master good point do you know what i mean or if it was kathy griffin they'd be like it's kathy griffin she's a reverend right but because it was broke her so it's like that's a hard place to get your kind of discovery from a lot of people you're totally right it's it's the unfamiliarity so when you do perform you know in a city that you've been like whether it be chicago or and you have a familiarity they're like yeah let's have some fun let's see what he's come up with lately yeah you know it is weird when people don't make the connection like i did the

joke earlier about yeah i'm for rittenhouse and people were like you did and you're like what are you fucking nuts i'm joking but they don't know you so they don't know right norm was the king of that he would go to the sbs or he did the correspondent whatever and the crowd's like what the fuck is this this guy drunk is he psycho but the crowd at home is like this is amazing right because we know him yeah do you when you were doing the first new hours you did the half hour but then you're on the road headlining. And I know you have fans because that half hour was when Comedy Central actually like people would watch it. But you didn't have the fans you have now.

So that next hour, was that what made you be like, oh, I got to flush all this? Well, the you know, there's also, you know, like there's, you either get too much respect or none, right? There's no in between. You're either like, oh, I don't know if I should be invited to this. Or you're like, no, I can come in and watch. I'm a comedian. I can watch another comedian. They're like, I don't know who the fuck you are.

Yes. are yes and so um i would say so after my my half hour at comedy central which i did the same night as giraldo hey there you go and um we're on the same crowd we are on i think we're on the same no no he did he did uh earlier show i did the later show but i wonder if it was the same crowd i mean obviously you guys met him but like he had this likability thing yeah where it was just like you know he got me into clubs on long island like they'd be like who's this guy and they're like he's my friend i'm like i don't know how to talk to people and um but so he did he did like four half hours because he was in development with Comedy Central. And I was like, I want to do a second one. I want to do a second one.

They're like, nah, that's all right. And like what they told me is that my half hour was doing well enough. Talk about broken logic. I was told they're like, yeah, we don't need it. Enough people are watching your old one. We don't need another one. I'm yeah, we don't need it. Enough people are watching your old one. We don't need another one. I'm like, that doesn't make sense. Yeah, well, now we'll air The Office for 48 straight hours every two days.

But this was back when they used to just, you know, like Comedy Central used to, you know, like if you had a special on there, they would air it four times a day. Yeah. Wow. Four times a day. Oh, I remember you talking about those college kids. I was one of them. So I'm like, that's where I discovered you. It's Wow. Four times a day. I remember you talking about those college kids. I was one of them. So I'm like, that's where I discovered you. It's where I discovered Hedberg.

You know, like people just getting exposed. And you're like, what? Yeah. And not just seeing it once, seeing it twice. Right. And so I was trying to get another half hour. And they were like, no, thanks. We're all right.

And there was no other bets and like hbo so then i only got the hour because my manager at the time was partners with a guy that had been in uh ron white's manager who was part of the blue collar thing. So they were buying these blue collar specials. Was that Murray? McMurray? No, Alex Murray's my manager. Oh, okay. But McDonald. McDonald, that was it.

And so he essentially got me my special. I mean, I got no money or anything, but it was just to get the hour. Which one was that? Beyond the pale oh game change but but so like i do think that even the fact that i had and that's similar to letterman like i was the last of my generation to do a late night show back when they were really important and um like i just couldn't get with me yeah i was the last in my friend group i mean i've never been on it but me and i remember being like am i fucking like this is killing me am i crazy yeah but once you got it you were ready once i got it i hate first time i did conan i like i look back i still like the jokes i hated the crowd it was tough to

wait that long to get on and then and my second one was to this day the best late night set i've ever had but uh that's the thing about those late nights is the crowd is everything and i feel like letterman always was hot letterman it was no bad and amazing because there was a gamble it was a uh because that was a tourist destination people would get tickets i went and would go to new york city because they got letterman tickets so they were that was the show they were just like they just wanted to be at the ed sullivan theater so it was like the easiest crowd in the world yeah if anything you had to stop applause breaks because there's the the uh you know the applause People would be like, I got seven applause breaks. I'm like, I think we're going for laughs.

You know what I mean? Yeah, but it's funny the juxtaposition of like you go from these grimy bar room, smoky rooms where you're getting heckled and bombing. And then you bring that same killer act to this easy peasy you know shoe-in show and you get to be a star for six minutes it's weird because it used to be um the people i mean now it sounds like i'm making this up but like the people that would go to comedy clubs were not the same people that would go to the letter right right of course now i i think it's become much more um like stand-up comedy has become more domesticated i know that sounds like bullshit but it's like it used to be just kind of the weirdos like the comedians

it's now it's a middle class occupation before it. Before it was like, it was. Degenerates and misfits. You're in a basement all night. Yeah. Yeah, it was weird. Talking about your dick or whatever. Yeah. The late night set.

So the first time you did Letterman, how did you get it? I got it because I think I had. God, I mean, it's like, talk about like no respect and then too much respect. So I auditioned for Letterman and Conan the same night and they, oh, here's how I got Letterman. So they had this idea. This is back when it was, you know, like Eddie Burrell wasn't there. It was, and they had an idea. They wanted to do a premiere week. They would do a comedian every single night.

So it had to be their network premiere. So because I had never been on a late night show, I had an advantage. Right. So all my friends who had done i mean like ian bagg had probably done conan 10 times wow really yeah and you know giraldo had done all the stuff all these things and so because i hadn't done it they um that helped me get it. And so I remember that week, who else was on? But that week,

I think a lot of the comedians bombed. So a lot of the comedians didn't do that well. And because I feel like, I mean, I honestly, I mean, I was so ridiculous. Like after a year, I was like, I should be on Letterman. I should i should definitely be on letter i'm better than that guy yeah i didn't say that out loud hopefully we all do that but uh so it's shocking how long it takes oh yeah because

you see your progress like no one else does but you're like i've been killing i'm doing this many sets a night i'm killing no one notices but me so you start to feel like a crazy person totally you are a crazy person yeah it is it's such an insane pursuit and you can't explain it to people like what are you doing and i used to be like i do this and i get paid when i get paid i get eight dollars what are you talking about? The bills are crumpled up. A guy hands it to me in a handshake. He resents me for having to be paid.

The cab ride is $10 to get there. I have to chase someone down. They're annoyed. But we have the luxury of doing it now. Well, we've been doing it 15 years or whatever. But now comics can say I'm a comic at a dinner party and other people go, cool. Yeah. But back in your day in the 40s, it was like, hey, what does that mean?

What are you, Jack Benny? You were definitely someone who was mentally ill. Or the question was, have you been on The Tonight Show? Yes, exactly. And if you hadn't been on The Tonight Show, it was the equivalent of saying that you had a novel that you wrote, but you didn't have a publisher. It's just insane. Your first Letterman, did they tinker with the set a lot? Were they like, you can't say this, you can't say that? No.

Because that happens with us a lot, but you that that that happened later on late so once you were already established they're messing with your set isn't that weird yeah they trust you after a few sets that was that happened later on and then i was yeah no they did trust well it's like i don't you know like you don't know what was going on there but i do know that you know letterman would be like what the hell was that guy saying do you know what i mean or if it was they you know dealing with uh you know with the network criticism of filth right right i mean that was like letterman and conan doing sets on there definitely made me uh again these these were important shows like that could you could sell tickets like people would i mean this is before twitter you know i mean it's like crazy you would uh so if you were

on letterman you could sell out a show at the dcm prof wow you know i mean you not all of them but people would be like he was on letter yeah and um so like the uh so anyway so getting on conan or letterman they would be like, you obviously can't say blowjob. Sure. You obviously can't say, like, you couldn't say crackhead. Whoa. So you'd be like, all right. So, you know, again, you're like, all right.

And what I realized is like when there were curse words in there, it was the joke was just not written. Right. Not done. Of course. Yeah. And then, I don't know. It's so weird. It's like this journey of like, you know, there's some people that should curse.

It's so part of their authenticity. Good point. Right? Good point. It's like, is Louis Black not supposed to curse? Is Chris Rock not supposed to curse is chris rock not supposed to curse it's like of course they should yeah yeah and you don't see chris rock on late night yeah not doing a panel panel yeah yeah totally but it's different yeah i had to fight

to get boner on the tonight show really and i fought and it hit and i remember the roots laughed and i remember going to the booker being like you, you see? You see? But boner is a funnier word than erection. Yeah. I wasn't trying to be edgy. I was just trying to be funny. Yeah. But I feel like now the late nights are getting really curated almost to death. Oh, they are.

Oh, yeah. It's worse now. And it's weird because it's like you guys have kind of lost your power. It's like when I work on a late night set now i'm like this is time i'm taking away because i'm still trying to workshop it and and run it and i'm like i'm workshopping it for the lowest ratings you've ever had and i could be working on my social media shit yeah which is doing better you know way more views i mean there is something about uh you know you know it's like kind of like different i'm sure you guys do this it's like kind of like different. I'm sure you guys do this.

It's like, you'll like, I would say this to Ted or Todd glass. Ted Alexandro. Yeah. Love Ted. And we'll be like, yeah,

the crowd was, you know, and then we'd be like, but it's good. It's good to have that. It's good to have that because then it makes you, you know, it kind of toughens you up for. So like, I do think that, or I used to think when I did those TV sets, it was really, it was kind of like a fine cleaning.

Yes, I agree. Of these jokes. I agree with that. But that being said, it might also put it to rest a little bit. Because once I would do it on Letterman or Conan, I wouldn't do it on TV again. And so you would never put those jokes in a special. I would put them in a special. I wouldn't put them on like. And again, none of these clips ended up on YouTube.

It was just like occasionally on MySpace. Someone would be like, he did the same joke on Letterman. You're like, what? Yeah. I got that from America's Got Talent. And I'm like, yeah, I'm trying to not get heckled by the judges, dude. I'm trying to not embarrass myself in front of 10 million people. I'll repeat a joke I did on, you know, whatever.

Of course. Yeah. And those people like Todd Berry barry has a great uh attitude on that it's like those are like three people out of five million yeah totally i mean but we cater to those psychos all the time well it is like i do think that like people that are passionate about comedy are they're the most important people right i mean except for your peers they're the ones that like come out uh that that also you know you want to you want to have that influence it's kind of like when you do like when when i used to tour and you do like a road

gig and you bring it back to not even the city but like to brooklyn to like some hipster room and they'd be like really you're doing that joke and you're like oh shit sorry i uh do you know what i mean like you get lazy yes like it's really it's really important i haven't done this in a while but like it's important to do different rooms different rooms yeah you got to mix it up you always have done that man i remember seeing you at cabin all those bars back in the day and i respect that i was like oh shit he's trying i mean we've talked about this before but like you workshop it everywhere you see where it's not hitting you're like well maybe i can strengthen it so it hits here too but uh i i agree with you

on the uh on the commenters how they're important but at the the same time, I do think it's our nature to even when you're on stage, you see one person like this in the crowd, and I focus on them. It is also in our blood to just be like, that motherfucker doesn't like me. Yeah, completely. And you go, that's dad. To me, that's just like, oh, that's my father

pissed and not enjoying it. But there is something about the... But I do think that like you can get caught up in seeking you're never going to get everyone i feel like that's true kevin brennan would obsess on people in the audience be like what lady what are you so excited like dude you were killing killing not not out loud i'm saying in here yeah i know what you're saying once you start to obsess over them out loud you're like well now you're ruining it for every other person that's happy to be there you know no and it's particularly in uh you know in a comedy club environment where

they're right around you i mean there's also something about i mean i'm totally a nerd about this like where it's you know there are environments that are far more interactive. Yes. You know, like, the conversation, stand-up comedy is a conversation. And if you're on a stage like a Gotham, that's a stage. But if you're at the Cellar, you're kind of, you're, you know, like, people at a union meeting have more authority than you. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Like you're – The stage is this high. You're barely off the ground. And that's not to say it's bad. It's just a different dynamic. Yes. So in other words, it's more effective for people that are doing shorter jokes and also for people that are you know like the seller again i haven't been on that stage in 25 years but like you do i would do benefits you would pop in i've

done the underground i don't you don't you don't like the seller it's not like no it's not it's not that it's that you know it's like one of those things where, you know, as you guys know, you have to protect yourself from like giving your power away. Yes. And so there came a time where I was sitting there and I was like, how many spots did I get at the cellar? Oh, I only got that. Oh, I got this. And I would see my friends and I would be like, all right, you know what?

I just want to develop material. I want to do it in different places. There is also like the, I knew that like I had done so many, so much hanging out. I didn't want to do the hangout. I want to do my set and leave. And this is before I had kids. I was likeout i want to do my set and leave and this is before

i had kids i was like i want to do my set and leave and so there there was a culture there of hanging out which by the way seems it seems great i'm not criticizing it at all do you know what i mean but like the whole thing of like giving the power away, I didn't want to do that. And like playing the game. That's healthy. Whereas Geraldo is a master at it, you know. And that's not to say that people are kissing ass or anything like that. It's just like I don't want to play that game. I want to do my stand up and then get out of there.

You're more of an introvert. I don't think it's a power thing. You kind of just want to kind of – also I look at your stuff is like a lot of people that hang out aren't always i mean greg was an incredible writer but not everyone who does that is really focused on writing good point he was the rare case a lot of people that are hanging out are kind of like the the boisterous type where they're kind of you know they're shitting on people and that's hilarious and that's great but but you're i think i look at you as a very in your head type of like disciplined writer. It's so weird. You know, like Geraldo and I, like the fact that he ended up doing roast was like one of the biggest shocks to me.

Really? He was so great. He was a master at it. I think he's the best ever at it. He's the roast man. And Jesse Joy, shout out for a lot of those jokes, who is an excellent roast writer. Great writer. at it and jesse joy shout out for a lot of those jokes who is an excellent roast writer writer but like it was one of those things where again it goes back to

you know look obviously roasting is an art form it's it's obviously uh if people enjoy it but if you're if you look at it it's put down humor sure and now put down humor look by the way sarcasm is veiled hostility all this shit you can you can you can make it really uh nasty but like i remember i saw seinfeld at the comic strip Christmas party, and that used to be a big deal. Oh, we used to go to that. Free booze, free food. Yeah. And Ray Romano would do movies. I'm going to do a movie.

And you'd be like, Ray Romano did a movie. And Seinfeld was like, I'm just here. He goes, you know, instead of doing stuff like this i just work on my act and it was just like which is perfect jerry yeah he is this um king of absolutist yes i mean and so there is something but like the practical side of of roasting is it it seems a little uh waste of timey maybe or you know not to it's like are you bringing light you know by the way like don rickles beloved by everyone uh you know he he was the master at that too but he had an had an act. But he was also bringing light. I don't know.

That's true. There's a clip I just saw of Rickles, I believe, roasting Shirley MacLaine. She was old as hell in this clip. So was he. He must have been in his 80s. And he's roasting everyone in the room. And it's cool to see everyone like, get me, get me. Yeah, yeah, right.

It's rare to see that now. Now it's gotten so vicious with the rose that a part of it's like fuck what are they gonna are they gonna bring up like yeah it was a delicate touch i was i did uh bob saget had this he bob saget is like has an amazing relationship with everybody in the entertainment industry and he's the nicest person. He's the nicest person. He's a great guy. At this benefit, he had Queen Latifah. A lot of range. Don Rickles.

Wow. John Mayer. Wow. And you're sitting there. And I did a set, and I'm sitting next to it. And then some, I don't know, someone who started the movie industry. You know what I mean? Like a Goldwyn Mayer.

And so Don Rickles was older. Orson Welles here. They walked over and they gave him a microphone. And he just started making fun of everyone. And it was just like. The best. Unbelievable. I think Geraldo was an incredible roaster.

I love it. I do think what you're saying is now they with like the pop, you know, popularity of things like roast battle. A lot of those comics are like two years in. They don't have an act. They don't have a self-deprecating joke about themselves, but they've got five minutes on some dude they've never met. Yeah. And they're going up at the comedy store. So that to me, that's like.

But I guess if it's if it's writing, it's it is productive. And it's a way to get in and for greg it was like the roach were huge so that was selling tickets on the road for his ass he was you know you know i have this theory about greg is that you know uh what you have to understand is that like and this is my perspective completely is is that Greg Giraldo was brilliant. And I don't say that in a cute way. He was a really smart guy. Oh, yeah.

So he was like, his parents were both immigrants. He got into Regis. Harvard Law. Harvard Law. Columbia. Columbia. Scholarship all the way. Worked for the biggest law firm in the world.

Gave it all up, you know, to pursue stand up. He was so pure at this. And what I think the amount of failure and humiliation, he, you know, I don't know. But like it almost was like it took its toll on him harder because he's like all i do is win and and that was not his personality his personality was not like i win right it was just the track record like he could go into a club he was he was engaging he was not a sycophant he he had a confidence and a rapport whether it was long island or or the upper east side he could connect with all these types of people so like

when and i was there when he got his sitcom deal and the you know it's more of like how the level of cruelty the entertainment industry is like he had a manager not a manager an agent that was his agent that you know plucked him out of uh uh you know uh montreal and then within two years he saw her at a restaurant and she acted like she didn't know him. Damn. And you're like, wow. I got an agent out of Montreal and he left the company after signing me two months later and I didn't get an email. Isn't that wild? This is an ugly business. I mean, Greg, you know, you talk about how brilliant he is and you talk about the cruelty of this business.

But like his humility was, you know, that always struck me is that like he could talk to anybody. And like I was like, man, that guy would have been a great late night host. Oh, my God. I was like, when Jon Stewart leaves The Daily Show, who the hell is better than Greg Giraldo? Well, by the way. Who is an unpretentious liberal, which is kind of like what liberals need right now. Oh, yeah. With all this woke bullshit, you need a guy like greg who can keep it

real who can connect with both sides of the aisle i mean this is a guy who would crush in cincinnati in kentucky in manhattan like that that is necessary to you know as an entertainer but also as a human yeah no he actually so his he had so many pilots at comedy central that um you know he had a friday night you're better off having a pilot on malaysian airlines at this point but but you know this was this you know comedy central had more weight back then oh yeah no but like there was also so he really popped on tough crowd i only did tough crowd twice but like he really popped and he by the way that's that was like one of those things where you know like that combined with the roast because the format of tough crowd was very much a roasting environment yes it was guys being guys kind of thing ball busty yeah and so there was

they canceled um a tough crowd then comedy central begged greg to redo tough crowd wow Oh. Without Colin. Disgusting. He asked Colin. Colin goes, fine. He got shit for it. So there was that that didn't work. There was also a talk show that, I wonder if I did a guest set on it. But also, how fucked up is that? Greg's clearly looked up to Colin. We all look up to Colin.

I don't care for him. But Greg clearly looked up to him. We all look up to Colin, you know. I don't care for him. But Greg clearly looked up to him. He's a guest on the show. Colin. And then you're like, step in and do the show. He's like, that's just that's just the stupidity of the business. And this is also like, he's probably got two kids. He's, you know, they're like, do this.

And we've done six, six deals with you six pilots but there was a time when he they were gonna do another show he was gonna be the host of it and they tested and i'm like this is it greg's on his way and And that was when The Daily Show was really peaking. And they were like, they're just going to. And there was also a time when there was a power base in Comedy Central in L.A. and a power base in New York. And Greg was associated with the L.A. group. But the power base in New Yorkork was the daily show and i think chapelle and so so the power base in la had less influence i think and so they gave that time slot

which is by the way company central has so many time slots they gave it to steven cobert oh so it's like that close right and that was a great show and that was a hit and a great show so yeah you're right it's tough but it's so painful that you're like you put in the work like greg did you're right there and and there is a cruelty in this business that like you do have to keep getting up from yeah i mean by the way chapelle was who was also a phenom and like would destroy on a kind of other world level. Had sitcom after sitcom after sitcom that would fail. So it was very weird thing. And I remember like, you know, Geraldo, he was like i want a tour doing uh headlining and

i'm like i don't want to do that i just wanted to be a writer on letterman really so it's like when did that change for you i think i had done uh welcome to new york. And then that experience was so horrible. Like, that's what's weird also about stand-up is you, you know, you go on stage, you're essentially writer, director, producer. And then you get in these group settings. Yep. And you're like, people are like, that's good enough. And you're like, but it's not. Yeah. And they're like, don't be difficult.

Right. And so I was like, all right, I'm just going to do stand up and try and get acting jobs. And I never got any acting jobs. You're in a lot of stuff. You're the Hemi guy. I was not the Hemi guy. Oh, shit. Damn it.

But you got to talk commercials. That was the other white fat guy. Did that 70s show help you on the road when you were on that? Yes. Oh, yeah. That's a good show. I was very lucky because there was before, when I was touring before Beyond the Pale, I had that 70s show.

I had a Sex and the City thing. And I also had. That's right. Wow. That was a big show. What was the. I can't remember. You were on another show, My Boys, too.

My Boys. That was kind of after the thing. Gotcha. But that 70s show was huge. Yeah. That 70s show was like... I don't know if you've been to a four-camera shoot. It's one of the most boring things in the world. But people would come and hang out.

Like young Hollywoodwood we were just talking about kurtwood smith and deborah joe rubb and saying how great they both are oh yeah so good it's like insane how good they both are they're so funny yeah and by the way it's like did you see her on wandavision like she's still going oh yeah no i didn't she's in everything she was on seinfeld back i mean she's a great character actor yeah and he was also he was in robocop yeah was he also in um um beverly hills cop was that him i'm not sure maybe i don't think he was the first one i don't know he was but he's beverly hills. I rewatched recently, by the way. It's still so damn good. It's such a good movie. Oh, yeah.

Eddie Murphy. What a talent. Like, it's insane how talented he is. It's like, there's the fame thing. Yeah. And there's, like, selling tickets. But, like, as an actor, like, it is insane. Like, I don't get, like, the the clumps no matter what you think

of it gold he pulls off in that you're like holy i've said on this podcast i think he should have been nominated for an oscar for nutty professor i've i totally agree with you yeah i think it's incredible i i love eddie murphy i mean coming to america is to me the most impressive performance is nutty professor just because like he's playing so many like full characters it's incredible well I love Eddie Murphy. I mean, coming to America, to me, the most impressive performance is an Eddie Professor just because he's playing so many full characters. It's incredible. Well, he's also like the level of empathy that he creates. Yeah.

You know, because you know he's this guy with an ego and he's here we are talking about but he embodies this this guy that's likable miserable fat guy you're like oh right right yeah yeah i was just watching have you seen that show on netflix the movies that made us and there's one on coming to america and they go into how eddie murphy couldn't get any airtime on snl and these two writers were like i like this guy's good we should write for him more. And they were trying to use him to get bigger and he was using them to get bigger. And then they ended up writing

Coming to America together. But it's incredible that, I think the through line of this whole episode is the industry is clueless. The industry stinks. We got to come in and write jokes and do whatever. But there's never been a better time. Yes.

Because, sure, it's diluted, but you can put shit on tiktok and youtube and and facebook and instagram and anything so like thank god you can do all those things after you watch my special dude comedy monster on netflix just came out norm has got a new special too you should watch both of them i mean we're working Sam's not doing anything. I'm taking a break. I just went to a beach in upstate New York. You're engaged. You got engaged.

Congratulations. He got engaged to the Christian, and you're going to become a Christian now. I'm going to be a Christian. Finally. Talking about, we're going to do a lot more Jesus talk on this pod. I think that's what's missing here. Yeah, you go, I'll go Jew. We'll mix it up. You just want to be a lot more Jesus talk in this pod. I think that's what's missing here. Yeah, I'll go Jew. We'll mix it up.

You just want to be a Jew really bad. Everyone, every comedian does. Every comedian does. I love that comedians like us. Yes. That's nice. That's about it. But yeah.

Well, actually, the Christians in America are obsessed with Israel. So that's true. Good point. The far right loves Israel, man. They're like, that's their thing. Yeah, they really do. I heard you guys got bombed recently in Israel. You see that?

That was on this podcast. Hey, you brats. Let me add, before we got to go, just to skew off comedy. You got 17 kids. Yes. I'm thinking about having a kid. What? Wow. This is a bomb drop on the podcast we're getting older and who better to ask than the uh the father of nine here what do you think any uh is it horrible is it terrifying do you hate them do you want to

kill them do you like abortion talk to me you know i think i think i recommend it. Really? I mean, it's really hard. By the way, I've got five of them. In Manhattan? In Manhattan. You're the most prolific comic, and you have more kids than special somehow. I don't know about that. No, you're more special. That's close. But it's, yeah, I mean, it's taxing.

I mean, I hang out with my nieces and nephews. I mean, life is filled with misery. This is a tough sales pitch for kids right here. Does the joy outweigh the misery? Yeah. Yes. Okay. I also believe that people need to do things to evolve.

And I think that, you know. So you did it for the material. Now I become Jordan Peterson. I think you have to become a monster. You have to. I wish I could do his accent. Me too. It's still high.

It's Toronto. Yeah. But yeah, no, I think it's a strange thing. It does make you a better person. Okay. And I think guys have a selfishness. Does it help your comedy? I think guys have a selfishness. Does it help your comedy? I think so.

I think also it's a very abundant universe. So, like, there's also the fear factor. Yes. You're like, oh, got to make sure that this person's taken care of. Yeah. But, yeah, I don't know. I mean, look, I just did, you know, I was just on vacation with my family and we did Disney World, which I never want to do again, but I keep doing it every two years. By the way, if you haven't seen Jim's Disney World chunk in Mr. Universe, cue that up too on Netflix because that's another, that's one of my favorite specials ever. Thanks.

You can write all that but now i feel like um you know that's if you want to feel like you the symptoms of covet just go to you know walk around disney world for 10 hours so but i do think it's a sad sight over what else are you gonna do with your life true i mean it's you could just live it happily and fun well you don't have to get a pet either you know i mean right you don't have to travel to another country you know i mean it's you don't have to create more material you know i mean good point so good point i don't know it's got to be the right person you know to have the kid with like are they gonna be people wearing massive disney or goofy and uh that's that's a tweet comedians are children so is the person

that you're gonna have the kid with are they are they a non-child no i mean she's wheelchair bound but other than that she's not going anywhere I got a broomstick in the wheel. But yeah, yeah. All right, all right. I like that. I like that. But I hang with my nieces and nephews and the whole, it's beautiful and it's great, but you get to leave.

With a kid, you don't leave. Is the road really hard with kids? Or is it great? Great Tom Papa joke. Oh, yeah. You know, he goes, well, you got five kids. how do you go on the road it must be a miserable he's like yeah the hardest part is trying not to whistle while i pack come on that's a brilliant joke yeah i mean there is i mean look there is something of uh why you know not to sound like a piggish guy, that's why guys play golf.

Right. They don't like golf. They just want to get out of the house. Totally. That's a Seinfeld joke. Get out, leave family. You know, it's... That's the golf.

So the... You're drinking while playing a sport. Outside. Yeah. And so the... It is a sport, but you know what I mean. Right, right. But, you know, it's pretty amazing.

Okay. And there's not a single kid that I would trade in. You know what I mean? But it is. I mean, look, it's scary. Of course. You're like, you hope that the kid's okay. You know, the news, the local news becomes really more important

oh wow do you know what i mean it's like this nomadic life that we lead you know it's not like you know putting a down payment on an apartment it's like you're in you're in yeah so you can't flip it in the next two years you can't flip it and you can't sit there and, you know, put it down. Tear it all down. We'll start again. But it's part of growing up, I think. I don't know. Well, Seinfeld has, you know, the famous thing of, like, I don't want to have kids. I don't ever want to get married. And now he's like, if I didn't have kids, I'd be miserable, blah, blah, blah. Wow.

So, Bill Burr, same thing. Two daughters. I actually heard Jordan Peterson say the same thing. Really? Weirdly, yeah. I heard him say, like, that's, like, his meaning for, like, you know, getting older. It's, like, his meaning for life, so. Really? Weirdly, yeah. I would say that's like his meaning for getting older. It's like his meaning for life. And it kicks you into gear.

I know like Chris D had a kid. He was like, I got to work. I got to get out there. I got to write more. Louis said the same thing. Two kids, it makes you have to hustle. And then there's some comics where like I had a kid. I'm moving upstate New York.

That's true too. I'll do a road gig every two months. And you're like, all right, well, you're out. Yeah. So there's that fear, too. Yeah, but I think you have to, that's where you have to be with the right person that gets who you are. You know what I mean? And that we are children.

Yeah. Yeah, we really are. I shit myself. All right. Well, shit. This is the best episode of the show ever. I think it is, man. I want to thank you guys for coming out.

This is a classic. Thanks for listening to the Geraldo podcast. Watch Jim Gaffigan, Comedy Monster. He's got a bunch of other specials on Netflix. You know, seriously, one of our favorites. You know, so appreciate you coming on. He says that every week. Coming up next, Wilson Vince, one of my favorite comics. Oh, my of our favorites. So, appreciate you coming on. He says that every week. Coming up next, Wilson Vince, one of my

favorite comics. Oh my gosh, he's the best. Really one of the best. Any parting words? Any notes of advice? Any life hack? You got anything? Comedy better now or then? The audience is better educated about stand-up more savvy for sure

um but you know i mean i've been hearing a lot more let's go brandon's in the audience so i don't know i think it's the wittiest thing you're like you're you're doing i'm rick james bitch but it's but it's you know it's the same it's like it's the that. It's like create your own fucking joke. Point, you know? Yeah, yeah. All right, we did it. I got to go nap. We did.

Well, we love you, Jim. Gigs, you want to do? Oh, yeah. You got some dates? Richmond, Baltimore, Hartford, Sacramento, Beacon Theater in New York, please come out. Oh, wow. That's in May 9th. Wow. I think it's May 7th

actually but I appreciate pretty good Toronto oh yeah it's almost full so please keep moving it

milestone yeah and Toronto all that bullshit Columbus Miami Palm Beach back to Miami

oh not Miami fuck Orlando thanks for catching that. Same shit. samorell.com slash shows. All right. I'm at Sacramento, La Jolla.

I love how you guys have this memorized. I'm trying. Kansas City, Syracuse, Chicago, some other stuff. MarkNormanComedy.com. Check us out. Check out old episodes. Watch Jim's special. Are you in Chicago when I'm in Chicago?

Are you there in April? March. Oh, really? You can you can tell everyone do when you do press. Mention my shows. You got it. Go. Just follow Jim on every social.

Follow him on Instagram, on every tick tock, everything, Twitter. And, you know, see him on tour. Yes. The Hemi guy. One last time. I'm not that. Thank you so much, man. Thank you.

Thank you.