We Might Be Drunk - Josh Homme w/ Mark Normand &Sam Morril - We Might Be Drunk Podcast

Episode Date: September 7, 2026

Josh Homme of Queens of the Stone Age joins Mark and Sam for a wide-ranging conversation about surviving cancer, pushing through brutal tours, making music without repeating yourself, and what it takes to become a band nobody wants to follow. Josh also shares stories about Anthony Bourdain, George Carlin, Mel Brooks, Tom Waits, desert life, scorpion attacks, difficult audiences, crowd work, and the complaint line that brought in thousands of calls. Sponsored by: Protect your family with life insurance through Ethoshttps://www.ethos.com/DRUNKShop Avocado Green Mattress and experience the differencehttps://www.avocadogreenmattress.com/DRUNK Subscribe to We Might Be Drunk: https://bit.ly/ SubscribeToWMBDMerch: https://wemightbedrunkpod.com/ Clips Channel: https://bit.ly/WMBDClips Sam Morril: https://punchup.live/sammorril/tickets Mark Normand: https://punchup.live/marknormand/tickets Produced by Gotham Production Studios: https://www.gothamproductionstudios.com@GothamProductionStudios | Producer: https://www.instagram.com/mrmatthewpeters #WeMightBeDrunk #MarkNormand #SamMorril #JoshHomme #QueensOfTheStoneAge #ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #BodegaCatWhiskey Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

how you feel if you want to drink or you want to go Agua, you're called. I just had a screwdriver in the car. I don't know if that was a little prep. Hey, another wrong with that. No judgment here. Yeah. I might have... What are you having? I'll have, I can join you. We can stay on the vodka train. I could do a midday beer.

Oh, there's a whole thing. We got a full bar, baby. Yeah, I could live like that. No, I just shake my own. No, no, we got a guy. We're kind of drinking in the mood for it. What was that? He's showing you as that, too. That's what he is. Yeah, oh, what's on?

Oh, yeah, love it. Yeah. What does that mean? Yours is bigger than mine. Ah, I heard that before. Yeah, I'll take a vodka. That would be fantastic. Make it two.

Yeah, make it three. Do you go just straight? Oh. Yeah, send it. You know. No, yeah, wiggle it with something. I might go soda? Maybe a vodka soda?

Yeah, three vodka sodas. I love it. Perfect. All right. How are you doing, ma'am? All right. That's Dana. Hey, Dana.

Hey, Dana. You're off camera. Don't worry. We're rolling? Oh, we're rolling. Geez, I didn't know that. Well, dude, thanks for coming on the pod. Oh, thank you for having.

I'm a big fan. Oh, geez, you're the one. Yeah. Thank you. Wow. Well, the new album is awesome. It's so good. But we don't have to talk about it.

We can talk about anything. I just thought, you know, yeah, I have a new record, but who cares. Did you lose weight? Yeah. You look good. Oh, thank you. What did you do? I got cancer.

Damn. Wait, really? Yeah. Oh, geez. No, I got sick and then I, and it just sort of woke me up to a whole bunch of things I'd been not paying attention to in my life. And I, but that's why I thought I'd come here and drink in the day. That's what doctors recommend after a diagnosis. Yeah.

Whoa. Was it colon, anal, liver? It was removed, though, right? Yeah. Yeah, I was able to get it really early. and I and the but I had all these complications there was a there was probably a doctor mistake that I could have pursued if I was a I don't know maybe I could have whoa that led to all kinds of complications and stuff and but honestly I think those those types of things they're life changing oftentimes in a negative way but if you make it through them the life it's life changing in a really great way sure

It changed my outlook on everything, you know. Whoa. I really started enjoying things. Yeah, yeah. I got to get cancer, man. Yeah. I'll wake you up. Dana actually brought some for both of you.

There's a gift bag over there with radiation pills. Well, yeah. Our friend got hit by a bus, and he's like got a new lease on life. He's never been happier. I didn't realize how good my life was. I'm happy. I couldn't agree more. It's just a few, it was almost more the complications post that because they were so long and difficult and, you know, that, that.

And you also, the people that rallied around me that were my family and friends that was, you just knew instantly who was on your team. Right. You know, and it just, yeah, I thought, oh, it reduced everything that was important to something you count on one hand. Right. Shit my grandma told me. Sure. Sure. What's that old Buddhist thing?

What is it? Wait, hold on. A guy, a healthy man wants two things and a sick man wants one to be healthy. No, a healthy man wants a million things. I want a new car. I want a pool. And a sick guy wants one thing. Well, you know, you meet some old lady in the street and she's like, you got your health.

Yeah. And you just completely ignore what she said. Yeah. And you think nothing of it. And then one day in New York, he's got the Jewish accent. I know. You got your help. Half a day.

One vodka. He's got a New York out. But you didn't sue the doctor, so you're not litigious. No, I mean, that's not my style. I'm amazed that things don't fail more when it comes to that. Tell me about that. He did leave a Phillips head screwdriver in me. And that's why I'm asking for a screwdriver now.

Hey, there we go. No, but I can't be sure, you know, but by the same token, I am shocked that more. things don't happen when they open you up and I know around crazy you know there's that Chinese style which is uh you don't pay unless they heal you you know about this you don't pay the doctor unless you get it's like the NFL you get a signing bonus like afterwards you got to play all the games or something

well but I like but I the notion that you know you don't pay the doc unless it works well that's that's a way to do it hey I'll see you in health yeah go to health All right. There could be a place like that, though, called C-U and Health. Yeah. I think that's sort of...

Like an urgent care? Yeah. That's not bad. Or just a vitamin store. Hey, I like it. That was trying to admit that, you know, health is a complicated journey. Do you know how, I mean, did he attribute the cancer to any part of, I mean, your touring act for, what, 30 years?

Did he attribute any of that to... Well, I'd been, I was, you know, I'm the... The son of a contractor and my dad has always said, you know, the rest of everyone only moves at the speed of the boss. Don't ask anyone to do something you wouldn't do. And I always took that really seriously. I've always been really physically hard on myself. And at other times when I was, I hate canceling.

Everyone cancels. You know, I kind of. You'll play a gig when you feel like shit. Yeah. As an example, I fractured this metacarpal. got this separation between the two fingers, like a tear between. And so I just taped the pick to my finger. I was in Australia and it was like, I'm not going to go home.

Or I got Salmanillo once. We didn't know what we had. You're glued to the toilet, though, right? Oh, my God. That's a bad one. It was, we didn't know what we had in our tour manager room, Bergen, Norway. And our tour manager got quarantined at the hospital. He said, they're coming to the hotel if you still want to play.

get out of the hotel so we left. The hotel just kind of, you know, in quite a state. And they didn't know what he had yet, so we didn't know what we had. Yeah. We ate in Germany at an Italian restaurant during some kind of World Cup-style match where Italy lost. Uh-oh. And the staff was watching the television. As soon as they lost, they all turned and looked at us.

And I was like, no, I didn't, I'm not, I didn't, you know. And I guess we got served bad flesche. Yeah, they phoned it in after the loss. It really was. Is it eggs or chicken undercooked, right? Is what they say? Yeah, well, I think it was, I think it was rancid meat that we got it from. Good band, though.

Rancid meat. Yeah. First three albums. Yeah. But by the time we got to Norway, it was the drummer of this guy, Joey Castillo, and our tour manager, Kevin, and myself, who had it. And, and we decided to keep playing because we thought, but I lost about 30 pounds and about seven days. Whoa.

And, you know, you're sweating. There was, at least with your health, you'll never need Ozampic or anything, you know. No, that's true. I know that people keep asking me that lately. Salman, no, 30 pounds is crazy. I got to get my wife on that. That, that, you just rob me. Honey, I cooked for us.

Wow. That's, 30 pounds is wild. Well, but, you know, people die from this. It gets so dehydrated and all this stuff. And when he got his test results sent back to the States afterwards, I mean, you know, it was shocking to know that's what it was. Yeah. You know, but by the same token, you're all the way in North, it's so hard to even cancel. What do you do?

I know. We're leaving from Bergen. We're going to go all the, we have to take connecting flights. Right, right. I mean, that sounds like. connecting shits. No. It's just like...

We're comedians. We get salmonella, we can go, I got salmonella and then do the act. Can you do you say it or do you just play through? I mean, I can talk about it now, but I felt supremely embarrassed, you know? Why? Yeah, rock stars have to be cool. Oh, yeah.

It's funny if I'm like, I shit myself earlier. There was a guy... Yeah, true. He, he, somebody told one of the promoters that, you know, as we're slowly moving from city to city that we were, that Joey and I were really ill, you know? And so I watched this About an hour and a half We're at playing festivals and things like that

And I watched this Forklift lift a porta potty On to the side of the stage And I go grab the promoter I was like you take that thing off the stage right now So you don't want someone watching the show And going Oh there's a honey bucket in the back of it

Right It's just not fucking cool No Yeah You know To shit yourself dry is not cool At least you guys had together That would be weird

If it's just you had it Yeah, I mean, I feel like adding loneliness to that. Right. It's like really taking the mental. Sick on the road is like as lonely as it gets. Oh, the worst. Yeah, I found myself like laying on the bed on one side and then I was so sweaty that I went to the other side and then you go to the middle. And then you start laying diagonal because you feel like that's the only dry.

There's some dry locate. You're sweating so much. It's also funny that Ozzie bit into a bat. He's completely fine. Yeah. You have a nice Italian meal and you're fucked. Immunity. Yeah, I guess so.

He had that rock royalty immunity. Right, right. You know, the British... If you find as you get older, the touring is like, you know, you're partying way harder, younger. Now it's like, all right, I'll do three drinks. Is there like a limit where you kind of cut yourself off? I really only like, I don't drink so much anymore. I'll have a few drinks on stage or...

But not every night. No, no. And I just don't want to feel like shit, basically. And the shows mean everything. I mean, it doesn't matter if you're a comedian or a musician. If you've left everyone you do care about to go to, I was in Cleveland, to go to Cleveland last night. And so I need that show to go well.

Yeah. I'll do, I'll kind of do anything to make sure that happens. And if it doesn't, I really feel terrible. I've done the same way. Because it was like, why did I come here? Yeah. Why did I leave? And they got a babysitter.

They parked the car. They bought tickets and they're up there like half-facent. They're getting jacked. It's 85 bucks we're parking. It's 40 bucks for a beer. It's like, you know, crazy. You know, you want it to, I mean, you can't pressurize yourself, but I certainly don't, if a song doesn't go well or if a few, you know, we're opening

for the food fighters right now. It's like, and if there's some people that are indifferent. And I don't let that like bug me. Sure. You know, you kind of have to just push through that shit. You don't read comments, do you? No. Oh, man.

Good move. How hard are you on yourself? Like, when you have a show that isn't up to your standard, do you think the crowd always can feel that? Or do you think sometimes you're in your own head about it? Oh, I mean, I never get it to where I'm wondering how they think. I just feel so terrible. I mean, I don't know where you guys are at,

but if I know the show wasn't good for me, I want to enjoy too. Yeah, right. You know, and if it wasn't good for me and someone says, that was amazing. I'm like, why don't you just stab me? Yeah. Why don't you stab me in the chat?

Because it just, I don't want to hear anything in those moments, you know. I'm with you. I'm not a perfectionist either. It's just, I just. You have a standard. You want to set. I want to be one of the great live bands. I want to be dependable that way.

But we also change the set all every night. And so there needs to be risk. too. It can't just be the same, you know. That keeps you from going on autopilot, I would assume, also, right? Yeah, I mean, that, for me, it would turn into a job-type job if it's the same. And I've seen bands that they say the same things, and they, yeah, it's just the same. And we just did a tour that had an orchestra and stuff, and we played the same set list, and it was very small theaters.

And I enjoyed that for a while, but we didn't do it for very very. long. I don't know if I would be able to do that for a whole record. Right. You ever have the thing where the crowd loved it? They all had a great time, but you didn't feel like you were right? I have that as a comic where you'll have a good set and everybody leaves happy, but I was like, I was off. But so then how do you feel? What is that? Oh, that's horrible. It's not horrible because you're still killed, but you want to be present and you want to feel good about it too. Yeah, but yeah, that's when you think. oh if I would have they loved it and I didn't what would have happened if those two things would

have met where I loved it too how much better would it have been that's the best yeah I mean there there is there is that crazy feeling where a show goes so well and you get those strange in the moment you're getting those strange butterflies yeah where you're you know it's kind of like yeah like a 13 year old leaving a first date right right you're like holy shit if that happened, I can't, you know. Yeah. You definitely want to hold on to. Seinfeld equates it to surfing when you're up on the wave and, you know, it's like

you're keeping the ball in the air. Everything's going right, you know? You're all at one. The whole room is connected. Well, are either of you guys that sort of, if it's going well, you think, oh, all the other shoe is going to drop? Sometimes. Sure.

Especially when it's new material, I'm like, where am I going to lose them? Yeah. Because I'm in the building mode right now. I just dumped an hour that I taped. So now I'm like, how long can I get away with? new shit but then you're like there's gonna be a point where I lose them and that's okay because then you just keep adjusting night after night but right yeah but when you're as you traverse the countryside some jokes don't work in Boisey that do work in girls they usually do

you got to work them all right everywhere you know we're at the point now we're going international so it's like yeah I wanted to work maybe maybe there's one or two I like a thing where draft Kings was a punchline or something and that didn't work in like Oslo right sure but like it's It's going to work everyone in America, and then you're just like, I'll have one joke that is here, and then everything else is going to work. Well, so, okay, when did you guys, when did you start going international? Just recently? A few years ago, yeah, we've done Australia twice. They've got a good sense of you.

They've got good. Yeah. I was in Lisbon, and you could feel a disconnect. Oh, great. I'm going there. Oh. I'm going there August 29th. It was good.

They were great, but, and the rest of the world is so nice because they. Just No, you'll be fine Some audiences don't like At least for us I noticed like Scandinavian audiences They just they enjoy it But they don't laugh as hard

That's true That's just how they are There's not going to be a comedy fest in Norway No There's not going to be an Edinburgh In Norway Right right right But that's just their vibe

Right Yeah but that's all right Also you know It's like that's how they receive it But I do get offstage Being like what the fuck Especially though When you're in the ESL

the English as a second language. Because, you know, I like that countries have a stereotypical purveying personality type. Like the Germans, I just did, you know, we were just in Europe and in Germany. And, you know, before I've had a German interview say, you knew album is terrible. Wow. And you think, all right, well, that's not actually a question.

Yeah, worse things have happened here. That's just a statement that you're saying. And it's like, so what will you do? Wow. Well, I guess I'm doing it now. But I don't mind that sort of bluntness because not everyone has to like it. Sure, but, you know, you can't be like, your wife is ugly. Like, how far are we go here?

Well, you know. Well, I don't know. I think it's fine to be blunt. I sometimes appreciate that sort of bluntness. The Scandinavians have that sort of bluntness at times, you know. Yeah, true. But they learn their English from American telly. they speak perfect slang where if you're going to Munich some of these jokes might not land as

easily you know it feels yeah how much do reviews impact and albums release so do you find at this point you know I don't know I we I think for for us it's a little I've always wanted to be in a like a band's band you know like get the respect I don't want to I don't you know we just we were also opening for a system of a down in Europe and they were playing these 80,000 seat places and that's two nights, you know, I just can't comprehend that. But if we were that big, I wouldn't want to play a big place. I'd rather, I'd rather play a smaller place a few nights and maybe not everyone gets to see you, you know, because I just, I don't enjoy that size of a.

It's different. There's no intimacy. And you know what they're doing. Like I said, immediately it's 80 bucks to park and it's, and it's, you know, it's just, the vibe is a big part of all this you know totally especially in this new album there's a lot of like more low key songs yeah so we're good

I think that would play better in a smaller venue yeah well and so we're probably going to get like I'm I'm sure that we're going to get slammed at a certain way for your mellow now and all that stuff and but you can't yeah fuck them who cares

what are you supposed to do it's I mean that that critique is why don't you copy yourself and I'm 53 it's like why don't you just play heavy music like you're we just actually we just open a complaint line what I think we're the first band ever what's your name again mister Matt we've opened a complaint line I'd like you to call it let's call it oh we should call it all right we should call yeah we we've opened a complaint line on and we're we we opened about three four days ago really we've got 6,000 complaints. Are you being serious? I'm serious. This is a great idea. Yeah. I don't ever want to hear those, though.

Do you listen to them? And then we listened to them and then we reacted to them. And some of them are so good. But a lot of them are like, why can't you just copy your songs for the deaf or you copy like clockwork or copy these records, you know? Yeah. But it's not my job. They don't want any evolution in your style. Well, just them. Most people I don't, I think, you know, I listened, I mean, you listen to all kinds of stuff. Yeah, of course. You know, I listen to Dean Martin when I'm making dinner. Right. But I don't want to listen to Slayer when I'm making dinner. Sure, sure. I don't want to listen to rain and blood while I'm doing, you know.

But what if the Beatles did love me do for 50 years, you know what I mean? It would suck. I mean, that's what would be on the complaint line. Right, right, exactly. Some artists evolved too much like Kanye, but, you know. Although I did think when he did that, when he did that one album that was, uh, like about his mother dying. I thought that was like a really cool sound he did.

Sure. Also, you're going to make more records. So if you, if it's like, what do they say about the weather and why? If you don't like it, just wait five minutes.

Right, right. It's just like wait till another record. If it, like, I think there was a great quote where it was like, artists need to fail

in order to move forward. You have to try things and fail. And, and, you know, otherwise, what's the point, you know?

Yeah. You're expressing yourself. So you're not going to be the same person for 40 years. Yeah. And so, I mean, we always, I think we have a little time release. Sometimes it takes a little bit for fans to look back and say, actually, now I get this. Or they won't. But I don't know.

How does that come together, though, when you're, do you kind of all decide we kind of want to try this vibe a little more? Or do you just kind of pitch a song like Easy Street? Say this is like a more chill song. I just, you go by what you actually like. And I think at this point now. I want something to be feel real and feel honest and so this is brilliant I love this idea yeah 20 for seven complaint line this is brilliant oh let's play a few just some poor Indian guy fielding all these yeah yeah but we've responded oh you're going to call it yeah call

the Stone Age complaint hotline the time is now to set the record straight press one to make a Press zero if you have no complaints. Yeah. Wow. Press one. Press one and we'll call him ugly. Make the mark. Care of the part.

Leave your complaint by voicemail. Great. To the tone. Hit pound when you finish bitchen. When you finish bichin. Oh, do you have anything? I liked him before he had cancer. Wow.

Press zero. That's my best radio. You really nail it. Good. I'll complain to review. You're really. You'll be hearing from a... Wow, you could put some time into this.

This is great. I mean, that was... What was constructive that you got there? Did you get any that you were like, oh, this is kind of good? No, it's just for fun, really. And I, you know, I think if you want to make art, you can't listen to anybody. If you have an idea and you tell 50 people, 49 people need to say, please don't do that. Yep.

Otherwise, how could it be good if anyone could just have it, you know? Totally. And I think you should... I mean, you got to have a... But that's a weird thing much standard, but you do. kind of in some way crowdsource it. Because you build an act by touring the country, be like, this works, this works.

But you're right. I mean, it's got to be approved by you. I guess it's got to go through you. But I think the feedback is laughs or not. Totally. And so it's not someone filling out a comment card saying, nice shirt asshole or something. You know what I mean?

And I think there's a luxury and it's not like, why can't you keep telling those 9-11 jokes? You know, you don't grow. Right. We got some that were, there was a whole grip of them that were very tongue in cheek that said, stop evolving, stop growing, stop trying to change and stop trying to move forward. That's great. Which obviously is, you know, and largely they've been positive. Masked is something.

You know, we got one that was amazing. That was every time I listen to you, I blow a load in my pants, but I love to listen to you and I need pants. And then the guy called back and was like, he kept calling back. So there'd be another one and it said, send more pants. And so, you know, we're going to get him an old Navy gift card. But I think it was, maybe I'll give this a goo. I think it was Noel Gallagher. Is that his name?

Yeah. The Oasis guy. He said the audience doesn't know what they wants. You got to tell them what they want. Yeah, because he compared it to fashion. He goes, you don't, you say, you just give them what they, they don't know what they want you. You just give them this and they'll want that. 100%.

Or they don't respond at all. and you're playing in your bedroom again. I do think they call it, they call it a following because you follow us. We don't follow you. That's a circle. That's how toilets are made. So I think you have to, you know,

I mean, I guess the harsh way would say, I just don't give a fuck. But the gentle way would be, you know, you're just trying to do your thing and I'm sorry, I can't pay attention. I can't canvas the area. Yeah. You know, but I think that's okay.

I also would say that committee is usually bad. Anything by committee, especially with art? Like, look at Larry David. He writes the show. Kirby enthusiasm is great. If he had eight guys in a boardroom going, ah, she's a little mean, she's yelling a lot, he's fat, the black guy's a little stereotypical.

You know, it would ruin it. Well, you open yourself up to your sponsors having an opinion to. People that have some kind of investment in you. No, thank you. They really, we make records and no one gets to hear them until they're completely finished. Not our managers, not the label, nobody. Because I don't think you should, when you're playing something half finished, what are the chances? You have to say it's going to be kind of like this, but bigger and blue.

Yeah. And you shouldn't have to use your imagination to make it good. Sure. You know, you want to play the finished thing. Yeah. But I also think, you know, it's fine that some things aren't for everybody. Yeah, of course. You know, I don't like raw onions.

I've tried and tried, but I just don't. But they're still going to grow. Yeah. And it's going to happen. It's going to happen. Right. And so. You should try the Vonian complaint line.

It's pretty good. Yeah. You've got a big one. But no, there's also that fear when you keep growing as, you know, an entertainer that, you know, especially musically, this is something we don't, this is not our area. But you can do a sound that just is hip right now. And like, oh, that's a sound people. Like, I hear autotune sometimes. And I'm like, that guy's voice was unique.

Why is he doing auto tune? Yeah. I agree. The voices. To fit in, especially, you know. Yeah. Yeah. Or people that do what I call buffet where it's like there's a rap verse and there's singing verse.

Yes. And then, you know, they use like, you know. Like one of these will stick. Like it's all in one song where you feel like you're at hometown buffet where you're just like peanut butter, jelly, horse radish. Right. You know? And I just, I think that kind of pandering is, that's what I'm not. You hear that Lincoln Park?

I'm kidding. Fine, man. Good band. It's just joking Lincoln. But I know what you mean. They got a rapper in there. There's a rock in there. There's a reggae guy in there.

I mean, kind of desperate always looks that way. And I just think, you know, you've got to kind of march to the beat of your own drummer. It'd be like a comedian going like, I like sour cream. But actually, it's pretty bad. Yeah. What do you guys think? Yeah, you got to have a point of view and stick to it. Yeah, I think, yeah.

What about that thing that happened? in a mensia i just saw that thing you guys were talking about the tax thing yeah yeah for getting taxed for fucking out you know i for stealing yeah crazy yeah that's this thing yeah yeah that's totally true oh my god crazy crazy comes back around again i know you're in you know a lot of comics you did a portlandia right yeah i mean i'm fred and carry for years i was uh i was a disappointing gay with swarston and uh love sworeston yeah i mean i've said this before but But everything changed for me when I was nine and I, uh, we went, my folks and I and my grandparents, we never swore in front, oh, I mean, at nine, why would I?

But we never swore in front of my folks or my grandparents was, and, uh, we went to the desert in and, you know, my dad was like, George Carlin's funny, isn't he? He's funny. And, you know, sort of asking me and I was, you know, I'm nine, so I maybe should ask someone else. Yeah. When you had to get it, you know, I got a rental jacket. You had to wear a jacket. It was like a big yellow sort of sportscaster looking coat.

And I felt amazing and, you know, sat there and watched, I think it was Judy Tanuda. Wow. Or no, sorry, Fred Travelina. Okay. Opened up and, uh, and saw Carlin and at nine at nine. Whoa. And it blew my mind. It, I, you know, his.

fascination with language that became my fascination with language. The English language is great because it just takes words from what other language. And there's all the entendre and double meaning and all this stuff. And it really changed my life. And it really, really shocked my grandparents. Oh, yeah, yeah. You know, ending with the seven words. Wow.

And then I also saw, I also saw Rodney about. A year later. About a year later, going back to Vegas with my folks. Come on. And he got booed off stage. What? And it was Judy Tanuda that opened for him. Wow.

At what happened? He was using the same stale material. He really hadn't pushed. He was copying himself. He was not growing. What's not his fault? He didn't get any respect. Yeah.

He should have had a hotline. He could have got some feedback. I'll tell you, leave him message. And it better be nice, you cuck, cussars. I mean, it would have been amazing. to leave him of you know mess. Oh my God. But I didn't know you could get booed and that that was a real thing.

I was just too young. I didn't know that if it doesn't work. He was just, how long was he bombing for before he got booed? I mean, he was, he was bomb. After the first five minutes, it was all men's downhill from there, you know. Oh, he's probably fucked up too because in those later years, he really got after it. Yeah. I mean, I'm 53, so I was about 10 or 11.

Wow. And, and, um, and he. had a resurgence post that, I think, like, old school and all that, or no, back to school? Great movie. Was after that. Got it. I think so. And so he had, he got it going back on, you know, Basanova after that, you know.

But I just didn't know that if it, if it didn't go well, that they could sort of collectively say, you're out of here. Yeah, that's crazy. And, um, well, it's funny you bring up Carlin because he's the most reinventing guy in comedy. He was the hippie-dippy weatherman. He wore a suit for a while. Then he became the angry guy, the social commentary guy. Identity crisis kind of. Completely.

Yeah, but a great mutual attacker. Completely. Yeah, he was great. I mean, I think both of you guys are great at this mutual attack that, you know, if you're not into group think, that means either side will make glaring mistakes. Of course. And everybody should come get some. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

And if you, and it's, it's so much, I think too, philosophically, the fact that the darkest and most difficult things should be made fun of as a way to get people to sit down and talk with you about it. Right, right. I always say it's weird when people get offended by certain jokes. I'm like, oh, I'm using that to cope. Yeah. You're like, how could you joke about that? It's horrible. I'm like, that's why I'm joking about it.

So I can feel better. Well, what's left is to feel terrible about it. Yeah, exactly. I mean, there's nothing left if you can't giggle on the robo to hell. Right. Stanhope had a great line about this where someone's like, how dare you make fun of that? And he goes, how dare I make fun? Like I'm making it fun.

Yeah, I make fun whether it is none. What are you talking about? Yeah, Chad Daniels has one of my favorite joke or lines. He does a joke. I like him too. He's great. He's great. He does a great dark joke.

And half the crowd goes, oh, and half the crowd dies laughing. And he goes, man, it's got to suck to be you guys. Because your life is inherently worse. They hear that and get joy. You hear that. and are horrified. So you have a shit of your life. Well, I also think there's something, too.

Like, I always have said, if 20% of your audience doesn't hate you, you suck, right? Because it means you're not growing, right? You're not pushing. And you also probably get in a new audience when you put out a new thing, too, because you're tapping into a different part of you, you know? But just like friends, you know, you know someone for a while, and then you're kind of paralleling your lives. And then as the years go on, they peel off on a, going, heading a different direction than you are.

and it's okay. You don't say, if we've grown apart, fuck you. Right. Yeah, they might be back. Life is long. Yeah, and so you agree that these people that are traveling with you at the time will go in and out and come back perhaps, you know. Yeah. And I also think nothing mobilizes the 80% of people that really love what you're doing, like the 20% that's your shit.

Yeah. It gives them something to rally around and warm their hands. hands around, you know? It's like, um, same with movies. If the director keeps making the same thing, I'm bored. But like, even their directors who are like, I don't love all their work, but I respect all their work. And that's almost like cooler because I'm like, oh, that didn't resonate with me, but it was a fucking awesome swing. Speaking of that, do you see the Odyssey yet? We liked it. Yeah. I, I, I felt strange about, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm not sure if I loved it. I want movies to be like that in scale. Oh, crazy. You feel something after you can talk.

talk about it, debate about it. Yeah. And even when they were talking about the, you know, what is it, the people of the sea, because that's a real thing. There was a real thing where the crux of knowledge and all that was, you know, people were being attacked by the people from the sea. So there was an Egyptian pharaoh that took those people from the sea and then put him, put them in his army.

Is that like the enemy? Is that like strangers? Yeah, there were a, there were a, now they call it immigrants. Yeah. I got you. They were a crew of pirates that were destroying all these ports that had vast knowledge and really sacking the towns. So I've always so terrified when they show up, right? You're not people from the city.

Are you? They're from Morocco. I heard they eat cats. They're eating the cats. That was good. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, that was a fun movie. Yeah, there were stuff I really loved about it.

There were just some, I didn't love Leguizamo. Really? I thought it was great. little by him too. Damn. This is Superman. Or I saw it Super Mario. Yeah. It took me out a little for a second.

Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. He was Luigi. I'm sorry. Hoskins was Super Mario. You're right. You're right. Bob fucking Hoskins. He was Super Mario.

I missed that film, guys. I'm sorry. I didn't go to your movie night. He took it because his daughter or his granddaughter, someone in his family was like, you got it. I love this video game. And he was like, yeah, whatever. It's amazing the things you'll do to score points for your kids.

Oh, God. Totally. Look at him. Holy shit. Hoskins. Look how young Ligizam was. I don't know if he's really reading Luigi. More Hispanic than Italian. Yeah.

You're like Luigi. And Hoskins is British. Yeah. Yeah, that is really. Dude, what's the Hoskins one with the animation that's unbelievable? Roger Rabbit. Oh, my God. That's an unbelievable movie.

Zemeckis. That was a good movie. On Real. So Mecca's is great. Yeah, always great. Did he do Kentucky Fried Movie, too? Do you know this movie? I love that movie.

I've heard of it. Catholic High School Girls in Trouble. Yeah. You've never heard of that movie? I've heard of it. I've never seen it. It's kind of a compilation of skits. What was Landis?

But it was done. Landis, but I think Zemeckis had something to do with it too, didn't he? No, Zucker. Oh, Zucker. The Zucker Brothers. Yeah, of airplane and top secret fame. Hell yeah.

Yeah. To the classics, man. Top secret holds up amazingly. Valcomer in comedies is like unreal. Yeah. Unreal. And also, I love. Val, especially in those early things where he, I don't know, I suppose it's a thing that actors do.

It's like, can you ride a horse? And it's like, no, I can't. Yes, I can ride a horse. Yeah, yeah. But you can't. Right. They were saying, can you sing. And he says, yes, of course.

Yeah, I can sing. But he'd never sang a note in his life. Whoa. But he's slays in that movie. Dude. Another thing about the Odyssey. He's so cute in that movie. He's a handsome devil.

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That's avocado green mattress.com slash drunk. Avocado green mattress.com slash drunk. Nothing about the odd. I thought he went a little too Jason Bourne at the end with the last fight. scene. I was like, all right, you're beating up 38 guys alone? It went on a little long. It's not really possible, is it? Yeah. I was like, come on. You're the old man.

Well, and then and then he was supremely injured. Spoiler alert. Yes, yes. Supremely. And he had shit like flopping off of him. Arrows. Yeah, and even a spear strangely attached there. I got a muscle contusion the other day. I couldn't walk for like five weeks.

He got like impaled. I know. I'll go in exile now. I'll go in exile now. At least he got your health. Right. Right. But then she says, don't, you're going to die. And he's like, no, no, I'm not going to die. And then it shows him on the fucking boat. No, I got the gods.

Yeah. The gods got me. Zeus, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And also the son went upstairs to fight the other guy. I'm like, help your dad. Yeah, and he's having trouble with one guy.

One guy. Oh, he's supposed to fucking man the throne? Exactly. He says to him, don't help me because you'll be exiled. Yeah. And it's like, I don't know if I could watch my old man just getting, just getting the shit. it kicked out of it. And be like, well, I don't want to be exiled when this is over.

Yeah, and you're going to win and you're going to be King or whatever. I don't want him to kick me out of the country club. I don't know how long that guy's staying King, too. He just didn't. It's so weird to see Tom Holland play. He's like he's Spider-Man and he's this giant pussy and it comes out in the same weekend. What a big weekend for him, though, my God. And his girl.

How about Robert Pattinson, man? That guy is a fucking great. He's like the guy now. He feels like he's, that new Chris Hanson movie looks awesome. recently good. What's that one? He's playing Chris Hansen from To Catch a Predator. It looks fucking awesome.

Yeah. What? There it is. Prime Time. The trailer's got like 10, 20 million views or something already. Yeah, well, you know, actually, what a perfectly timed movie. Yeah, good point. And also Poland is killing it.

Did you hear what Poland's doing? No. They're like, we don't give a fuck if you were going to bury the Epstein Files. There might have been Polish women. we're launching a full investigation. They've got all the Files. Damn. And if he fuck Polish women, then he's really a monster.

I mean, that is. No, Polish women are hot. I'm kidding. Oh, okay. Oh, you were a joke? Yeah, yeah. It was a joke. Sorry.

No, Polish women are hot. They're very attractive. I mean, Epstein's Island. Come on. Yeah. There's no slouches out there. It's not going to fuck itself. Yeah.

No, I think that it's amazing that they're going in. There's a, I think maybe even France is doing something. a little bit like this where they don't care what we're doing. Really? Good. They definitely need to get. Well, you say, I mean, England took charge with Prince Andrew, right? That's true.

I know, but they, they had to, I guess. It was about leaking spy stuff. Yeah. And then they were like, is everyone good? Is everyone good? Did we do good? That's more than that that was leaking. They need to go in completely and get all these motherfuckers.

Yeah. All of them. Well, it is weird. We literally have a list. And then Bill Clinton's like, hey, I'll do it. You know, he's just out there hanging out. What do you think Stephen Hawking's did? I mean, obviously he blew into something, but I don't know.

Apparently, the island was wheelchair accessible. I don't know. Yeah, exactly. Well, that's good. That's nice. We're going to go with the positives. Yeah, but this guy, he cheated on his wife. As long as it's compliant, let the rest settle.

He loves a vagina. He's got a crippling addiction. All right. I hope they fucking get them all of those sons of bitches. He can't drive, but he loves trafficking. All right, all right. We did all those jokes on that. on their show?

I'm almost there. I'm stuck in trafficking right now. Don't forget to work the balls. Okay. If they're there. Yeah, did the girl sit on the lap? Did they take a ride? You've got to wonder how they went.

He can really complain that you guys. Assaulted by Epstein. By Hawking. Yeah. That man assaulted me. Yeah, him? Yeah, like folded laundry. He goes full Rodney Dangerful.

Easy on the keyboards. Wow. I'll tell you. I went to Epstein's Island. I couldn't get a massage. I'll tell you. No respect. You just made me caps lock.

Oh, Jesus fucking Christ. Look at that. Oh, wow. Who had to put him on the beach chair? That's the thing. It's a real boner killer watching that guy waddle around. And he's having a bloody merry there? Yeah.

No pun intended, my God. And how's the dirty talk with the keyboard? I don't forget. I got needs, special needs. Especially if it auto corrects it. Put it in the parking lot. Right, right. Something completely wrong.

That's not what I said. Didn't Trump, wasn't Trump's all the thing? Wait, wait, go back one. Go back one. The jacout. What is that? The jacuz. He can't know.

That looks like a punishment. Yeah, it does. You'll come out when you're, when you've thought about what you've done. Right. Look, we're seen from the deer hunter. Fucking. Damn it, dude. Got to get these motherfuckers.

Flippers in a hot tub. This is crazy. That looks like that, that billionaire submarine. Remember that thing? Oh, God, the Titanic thing? Not, is that what it's called? It was the Titanic thing. They were looking,

is that what it's called? The Titanic remains, yeah. Yeah, the Tin Can. Is it Titanic? That's too on the nose. No, no, that's what they were viewing the Titanic. Oh, I think of the name of it. They never fully saw it, but they, until they got next to it on the floor.

Got it. Got it. Okay. Yeah, they gave them like an Xbox control to man the thing. Maybe your first time this isn't a good idea. That was crazy, too, when they died, Everybody's like, oh, they were billionaires? Fuck them.

Like, if they used a Nintendo controller, this might have turned out different. Yeah. Know your gaming. Yeah, wow. I think there's a movie coming out about that. Yeah, Robert Pattinson starts this. He's the submersible, and you've got to see him. It's incredible.

You got to see it in 4D. You feel like getting waterboarded. It's great. Oh, awesome. Have you ever seen a movie in 4D? I haven't done it yet. I saw Wonka with my littlest boy, and I didn't realize. to the extent that they jiggle you,

you're being jiggled, you know, and wiggled. And then when they were talking about like fragrances on screen, something went, and I was like, ow, ow, ow. Whoa. And they sprayed a fragrance in my goddamn eyes. Holy shit. That guy didn't see broke back. Holy shit.

Your eyes would be ruined. The seats were ribbed for my pleasure. Yeah, but it's a lot like in Kentucky, fried movie when they do the movie and feel around. Oh, feel around. It's a lot like that, you know? Right, right. I recommend you definitely go see one of your favorite porn's in that

4D in you. Yeah, 4Ds in you. Yeah. Damn, dude. Wow, they jiggle you. Yeah, they wiggle you, they jiggle you. It's like hawking on the island. Yeah, and then they spray mist, they sprayed wind, you know? Oh, that's cool.

We're seeing Odyssey in 4D. I wonder what that is, just taking a spear to the side like, Jesus. Yeah, right, right. They got to do something to get these people back in the theater, you know? Yeah, but I personally, I love going to the theater. Me too. Especially when they, in New York City, they got like the Metrograph, film form, IFC. They play old movies.

You could see a classic. But there's the same thing. So I'm from Palm Desert, Joshua Tree area. Oh, who's from there? Well, most people, like thousands of people die. there every year, but only three people are born every year. Seriously? And I'm one of them.

Wow. So, well, I mean, I think more people are born there now, but when I was, when I was a kid, but in the summertime, it's so fucking hot. Yeah. That you go to the movies. And the same here, it's so stifling. Right, right. You go to the theater.

Sure. You know, you don't go home and stream something. I know. You know. It's also fun. It's like that communal experience of, I saw the movie, the invite in the theaters. and hearing other people laughing around you. It was like, oh, I haven't seen a comedy in theaters forever.

It's great. Great. I've said it before. I saw American Pie in a black theater in New Orleans, and the fucking commentary was better than the movie. It was so good. Mystery Science Theater in New Orleans stop. Yes.

The Times Square back in the day, it was fucking insane. Yeah, totally. I saw with one of my best buddy Rio, Blessed Soul, wherever he is, We went and saw Blazing Saddles At a 7,000 seat That's normally a venue. It's a venue I played at 7,000 seats. Jesus.

Sold out. Wow. You know, and I was sitting next to a family of Asians, you know, the whole row in front of me was, you know, a full black row. Yeah. You know, Mexicans to my left, you know. And it's a song, Mexicans to the left,

Here I am. Asian family to the right. Stuck in the middle with. Jew. Stuck in the middle of a Jews. And afterwards, Mel Brooks gave a talk. And, you know, at first, I thought, okay, this is going to be interesting. You know, who knows what the reaction is going to be.

But it was so brought everyone together. Yeah. It was so good. Everyone was dying, laughing. It's so hard. And then the interviewer asked. one question and then Mel Brooks just talked for 90 minutes. Wow.

It was almost like, I got a pee and I'm in the center of this row. Sure. You know, I don't want to miss a note, but also I'm about to test these depends here. Right, right. It was, he was incredible. And what was mesmerizing is how united everyone really was. Yes. Over, you know, you know.

That's what bugs me now is like, I'm not one of these guys. You can't say anything more, but I do find that audiences are looking. they're like analyzing for a problem, you know? And that movie was just nothing but problematic. That movie was just a giant tension release. Like, that's why everyone just like, oh, this is so fun. And it was originally supposed to be Richard Pryor played the role in Cleveland. I know.

I know. But I guess the studio won't go for it. You couldn't insure him at the time. I think he did some writing on it. Yeah. Yeah, you know, he did a bunch of right. There's a great doc about it. The Mel Brooks doc?

Yeah. Oh, it's so good. Yeah. But there's also a bunch of behind-the-scenes stuff about Blazing saddles and watch the bloopers too the bloopers are incredible is that one of your favorite movies oh yeah it's it's i i think it's such a triumph that that you know they say couldn't be made but i think it's it's so silly and eloquent at the same time agreed it's smart you know and i think also i think that casting madeline con and and she's awesome anything madeline con is in always

amazing you know have you seen her in clue yeah she's the movie clue and she's so good in clue yeah she's always great is she in there hi to young frankenstein yeah of course i mean young frankestan it's terry gar oh hotchum lotcha love her that was that was and dude her and after hours one of my favorite they say she was a bit of a party girl which i'm taking us likes to go out at night i'm not taking any further but i i think to myself would love to party with terry yes oh gar i'm a gar boy cool funny woman is like that's a That's up there. Oh, I know.

What was your first crush as a, like, your funny girl crush? Mm. I love Diane Keaton because, you know, I went to New York kid and went through that Woody Allen phase and seeing her in all those movies. The hats always got me. There's always a barrier there. Oh, really. The hat, it was a barrier. I couldn't pass the hat.

Oh, wow. Okay. The hat and the tie and the men's coat and the face. I guess I'm the full chap. I guess I'm like, dude. I don't know. I think so. I was born a Woody.

No, I just thought she was cool and quirky and, like, there was no one like her. So, yeah, she was one for sure. I'm thinking, like, funny. For me, it was Marissa Tomey and my cousin, Benny. That's big. Oh, yeah, that was cool. I'm fine. Oh, Goldie Hawn is a kid.

Oh, Goldie Hawn is big. I was going to say, Goldie Hawn is mine. Like Private Benjamin. The giggle. The giggling. The giggling. And just laugh in. Yes.

So cute. I grew up watching all these Dean Martin Rose where making mistakes was part of the fun is watching the mistakes. Right. And what they do with the mistakes. and those two, Dean Martin and Goli Hawn together, those mistakes and her giggling her way through this, I just can't get enough of that.

Yes, she's very childlike. Honestly, Julie Lue-Dreyfus too. Oh, very hot. Seinfeld was so big. Yeah, and even Veep. She's like fantastic and just smart and funny and beautiful at the same time. Yeah, she's the whole package.

Just out of curiosity, just for my sick piece of shit mind here, what year did Goldie Hawn get breast implant? It's. I felt pretty late. 2021. Is that one of your tent, dude? It was just one.

Okay. It was only one. Get out of here. That's not real. She's got cans now. No, no. That's just, you know, life moving on. Okay.

Okay. Wow. Despite rumors, how dare you falsely accuse her of getting fake? I mean, we're going to get a seasoned desist letter, you piece of shit. I'm telling you. Season to sis. bigger with age. Double D's and desist letter.

Look, she has boobs there. You know what? Yeah, but yeah. And then you go back to 1969. There's no boom. Just saying. Yeah, things move on. All right.

Listen, Norman, you're going to have to get over it. I'm telling you. I hope it happens with my dick. I think it's getting smaller. Did you see Norman's got two tits on his dick? I got older. Your balls are huge. I'm sorry, Goldie.

I didn't mean to be in a besie. virtual lady i just figured oh look at how i just and so smart man smart funny yeah very fun what's the i can't believe the hat play oh foul play with chevy chase foul play or am i thinking of fun fact funny farm no no not that one okay no that's not good that's not a good okay okay sorry yeah who is yours you didn't say that's it marissa tome oh tome yeah it's a good yeah my cousin veney's amazing i even liked uh what's the lady uh oh oh The lady from airplane, I didn't mind. Oh, Julie, Julia.

Haggertie. Yeah. She had something. I feel like maybe she, I don't want to take a guess. She's in Freddy got fingered. No. She is, she's the mom. Daddy, would you like some sausages?

What's funny is that movie is not a great movie. No. But that scene of the sausages has always stuck with me. And so I've got three kids. So very early on, I said, guys, you need to sit down. My daughter, I was like, you guys need to sit down. This is important. And then they're, what?

What is that? Just sit. And then I would play that. And so over the years, I've been like, I've said to them, hey, sit down, guys. We have something serious. And then play that. Until finally it was like, sit down guys and like, Daddy, would you like some sausages? But that's, you know, that's good parenting for you.

There it is. There it is. Suspended sausage. Who knew? I mean, come on. My friend got, before I saw Ghostbusters, he was like, Sigourney Weaver, very pretty. And I watched the movie, and I was like, ah, but then at the end, when she's a demon, so much hotter. That really speaks to where you're coming from.

I guess so. But she seemed down as a demon. Yeah, down as a demon. Yeah, like, DTF. But the early, it's like, ah, just a lady. but look at that shoulder cooking come on yeah now why did she get breast implant

sorry Dana just joking around here oh come on galaxy Galaxy Quest she was hot oh galaxy quest that's a good flick too yeah yeah I mean she's always been as Ripley

and the more badass she got the more it's just it's undeniable oh yeah plus I have a thing for I like fangs when people have fangs or horse teeth or special teeth. Interesting. You know? Okay.

What that means? I don't really know what it means, but I've always just felt like a set of, you know, good fangs or just individual teeth. Yeah. So where you had on like Julia Roberts? I love a horse teeth. Yeah, I do too, actually. It is attractive. I like Sarah Jessica Parker.

Yeah. I mean, that's a fool. I'm on tour with the food fighters, Dave. I just love it. Yeah, yeah. I'll look at her there, just so badass with the alien next to her. Oh, hell yeah. I mean, I just think, yeah, she's a powerful gal.

Wow, that's like P. Diddy talking to you. Well, certainly that alien is oiled up to the hell. I wonder what the oil budget on aliens was. It must have been insane. I'll call the Ayatollah. Whoa, Mama. You know, I don't know what happened, but this is completely empty. Oh, oh, Peters.

Me as well. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry to put you to work. These were nice. Thank you, dude. It goes down too easy. Sorry, you have to actually work.

We were talking before you came here that we'd just both seen your Bourdain episode in the desert. That was such a cool episode. Yeah. Tony was awesome. He was awesome. He was a great drinking buddy and a great, yeah, just a good guy. I really, I think about him a lot. And whenever there's a, any.

he sort of, you know, his birthday was recently and, you know, uh, it's funny too, because some of these, you do interviews for a record and it's like someone said recently in England, it was like, you know, there's talk of a, there's a new Tony Bourdain biopic. Who do you think should play him? It was like, no one should fucking play him. He should be here. Yeah. I mean, I just, I don't know. Some of these questions that happen, you're just like, I'm really glad you asked asshole you know it just it's awkward because you're like is it going to live up to them now it's a movie so now do you see it or is it weird to see it it's just hard when when you really care about somebody and you're yeah it's just like you could tell that you guys had a closeness in

yeah well i said to him he had done uh an episode uh an episode about the desert and i and i said because i mean you know we we we met i mean it's got to be over it's like 20s. 20 years ago now. It was a long time ago. You know, and I said, oh, I just said offhandedly, because we'd been in a Christmas episode before that. Yeah, I saw that. You guys were playing. Yeah. And, but I said, there's all these really special places in the high desert I got to show you, you know, like, you know, and you haven't lived until you've been in the Walmart at 2.30

in the morning in Josh. trip. If you really want to see what life is like in America, that's that, that's the epicenter of it. It's like, you know, the antihistamine aisle. You know, that's the spot. And I just said, you know, but when you come, when you, when you, when you're next in LA, we'll just do a like a guy's trip and I'll show you all this stuff. And he was, and he of course was like, let's film it. And then I said, well, then I'm going to pick places that might be closing because. Oh, yeah. In the desert, that summertime everything gets shut down or it's so difficult when it's 118 to keep your restaurant open and keep that stuff right and so I think he always was a real champion of

that mom and pop street food definitely quirky places that don't appeal to everyone and so they're always on the cutting edge of being gone yeah you know and um so we went to places that were largely in danger of being gone and he's basically saved the them all. Wow. Because, you know, because Stant meant everything. Yeah, it meant everything. And there was all this data about, you know, if he went to your place, what happened

to your business and then what the dissipation level and the dissipation, you know, the first 10 months was through the roof. Right. But the dissipation level was two or three years. That's damn good. He visited Goldie Hawn's cans. Yeah. Right after.

They exploded. It's huge. And that's why I came here. Look at that, the fun Christmas sweaters. That was a fun episode. Yeah, that was cool. He's actually, he's annoyed that you guys are making noise and just brings you eggnog. That was fun.

And on that episode, we were waiting for the Christmas food to get cooked, you know, and meanwhile, we're outside getting absolutely cooked. Yeah. So by the time we're there on that shot on the top right. Yeah. Oh, actually, so that's me and him there. I've got a guitar and he was like, well, we need to shoot a promo for this thing. And, oh, man. And so I said, let's do the animal house thing.

You know, I gave my love a chicken. And then you'll break the guitar and do like, sorry. Right, right. And my daughter, Camille, she had been around Tony, reams of times by then, you know, a bunch of new. and so we score this guitar, score the back of it so it's easy to break. And he destroys this guitar. And before the episode came out,

I take it home and I said, oh, look at this funny bit, you know. And my daughter, Camille, who was about five or six of the time, she watched it. And she turned and was like, how could he do that? You guys are friends.

How could he do that to you? And it wasn't tears of sadness. It was tears of anger. And she was defending me. And she was like, where is he? Where is he? like he's always over there. Yeah, yeah.

And I saw, I said, I texted, I, you know, took a video text and said, Tony, you've got a six-year-old Camille who's fucking pissed. And there's no way out for you, man. You got it. And then she, she grabs the phone and says, hey, don't ever do that to my dad. And I said, I said, let me talk. It's going to be fine. And so I sent it Tony. And he sent back this video that was, you know, one part, you know, a bit silly in order to try to do it.

But also appealing to a six-year-old girl who's defending her dad. Sure. And that was like, you know, basically taking a knee, like, I'll never do that again. And I'll always check with you first. And I've got your dad's back. And, you know. And it was just. Do we have footage of the guitar breaking?

I don't know if you could find that. But did it go through? They went with that promo? Oh, yeah, they did. Oh, hell yeah. Sorry, Camille. Well, I think what was great about his show is that he had ultimate control and he had a great crew around him that had his, they were, they were, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was. Yeah.

And so, yeah, it was on CNN, but they really had nothing to do with what he was going to do. Right. going to do what he was going to do. Yeah. I think everyone, you know, you watch that and you can feel the authenticity of that, that he wasn't being sort of, there was no man with a hand up his ass doing the puppet show. Yeah, yeah. And when he would do the voiceover, it was just well-ridden.

Like those, it was. Yeah, it really was. It was profound sometimes. You knew there wasn't someone editing what he had to say, you know. Here we go. Oh. That's fun. We're at a place called the Integritron.

Sorry. We're at a place called the Integratron, which is a really cool, mysterious place built by this guy, Edward Van Tassel, who used to work for Howard Hughes. Very strange and peculiar place. Wow. Work looking into. And it was sort of struggling a little bit. And now, even now, you need to book that place four months out. That's it, right?

There it is. The Integritron. It's supposed to be a rejuvigrant. nation machine. It's the it was communicated to the guy Edward Van Tassel in his dreams by extraterrestrials and he woke up and drew the

the blueprints for this machine that you would walk in one end and walk to the other. There's not a single nail in it. It's all wooden dowels. Wow. And when the machine worked with when it was completed it was supposed to spin

and you know how this copper wires that were supposed to help transmit and rejuvenate. Damn. Not make you younger, but sort of make you as strong as you should be for where you're at. And obviously he never finished it. But when he did die, a true fact is that five black SUVs and men in suits came and stole all his paperwork. Whoa. And took all his file cabinets.

It's definitely something I'm sure Joe Rogan would dry. Sure. I'll bring it up. He would bang that to death. Yeah. I saw Blazing Saddles in there, right? Didn't you say on Rogan that you got stung by a scorpion? I did, yeah.

What the fuck? I did. Well, I know better, too. You know, one of the things you learn, people say when it's 118, you know, how do you deal? And you don't. You get a different type of pain. You get stung by a scorpion. Well, you don't.

You don't. And you realize, you sort of, what do the animals do? How do they deal with this situation? Yeah. And what the animals do is they don't come out till the nighttime. You know, there is no animals to be seen in the daytime in summer. Right. In Joshua Tree.

And I was driving up to this studio called Rancho de la Luna, which is in Joshua Tree. And it's in just a house. And, you know, I had a case of beer. We went and got a case of beer. And I know better. I had my shoes off. So I'm in the riding shotgun. and I get out of the car and I step onto the dirt in my bare feet,

which you really shouldn't do, you know, when it's hot like that. And I reach in to get this case of beer and I feel the craziest sting on my foot. And in the light of the, you know, the car light, which is being thrown onto the dirt, I pick up my foot and I look down and I see this scorpion just hanging off my foot. And I slap this thing. And much like Home Alone. when they put the spider. I screamed like,

it was a noise I don't recognize in my own, you know, voice. It was so high pitched and terrified. And so I do the scream and I jump in, you know, in the car. And when I slapped it, that scorpion hit the ground, sort of shook off and turned and came right at me. I mean, they're so aggressive. Because shouldn't it have been,

shouldn't this scorpion have seen me and said, oh my God, a fucking giant. I know, right? I'm not, I'm, yeah, but no way, nohow. This thing came at me. Whoa. And so I screamed again with the same high-pitched, impressive. Yeah, I should, I should have, but I was too busy shitting in my own pant. And so I, I, uh, I went inside. And from what I understood at the time, there were only two scorpions in the Mojave desert. One is, you know, like a bee sting, and the other one is 12 hours of central system shut down. Here we go.

And so for the life of me, I was like, one is iridescent, one is black, which one, what did I see? It's like, when you get in a fight, you don't really remember all the details, but I remember he had a red button on his shirt, right? So. But in Palm Springs, there's nothing black. No, just on time shares. Yeah. So I went inside.

Which one is a bad one? Please don't say the black one. I think it is, yeah Oh, it's racist Well, I didn't create it Well, anyway, so I I went inside And my friend Fred Drake said

I believe there's a wives tale That if you submerge your foot in boiling water That'll just draw the poison out And he said, in the meantime, drink this Is Jack Daniels, I don't drink whiskey That's, I just, I just don't And not any more Not any less

No, so I, so I start huffing down this whiskey, you know, which because being in pain and drunk is the perfect thing to do. Yeah. And then he boils this water. I put my foot in boiling water. I burn my foot. Oh, wow. That doesn't work, by the way. Oh, thanks, Fred.

Trying anything. And then this is pre-internet. And then we come to find out another friend came in and he said, oh, no, no, no, there's only one type of scorpion in Mojave. And it's like a bee sting. That other scorpion is in the Sonoran. South Central? Yeah. So I'd done all this stuff and worried and all for not, you know.

Oh, my God. Yeah. But hey, cool story. You can say you got bit by a scorpion. Yeah. So, you know, when you're trying to think of something to get tattooed, that's why, you know, try to. Oh, yeah.

You know, otherwise you just have like a clown with a balloon dick and you wonder why you did it. Well, I got a homeless guy. right here because he bit me on the train. Right. But if you get bit, you get a tattoo. That's a heavy load to bear. Hey. But I'm page.

Now we're talking, folks. Do you get annoyed by the term desert rock or stoner rock? Do either of those annoy you? No, I'm really pushed hard for that to become that because I, I'm, it just sounded more mysterious to me. And I'm never fancied that we were heavy metal or punk rock or, you know, I, I, I, I, I, I think if you don't want to be in a genre, it's better to try to make up your own and see if that will take, basically. Because that's something you said in the Bourdain thing, that you would get shit if you sounded like someone else when you were starting there.

But with comics, we always talk about, we're impersonating another comic when we start. Well, but that's where you start when you're young. I mean, my early stuff sounded like someone else. Who would you sound like? I really love the misfits. Oh, sure. I love the cramps and things like that. It didn't sound so much like the cramps, but I listened to a little.

a lot of GBAH and discharge this English punk rock stuff and the subhumans, which, you know, but you could track these bands getting better as musicians as the years went on. And so I just thought, oh, well, you know, and in the desert, if you, if you sounded like someone else you got made fun of, and so quickly, if you wore your influences on your sleeve, you felt terrible about yourself. And because you're not playing, you're not getting paid. And, and, you know, what people don't appreciate shit they get for free because they didn't do anything. That's true. You know, they just sort of abuse it. And so worse than being booed, if someone didn't like you, it was just silence or they're just talking their friend. You go, boom. What do you think?

And it's like just conversation. Totally. And so. Indifference. Yeah. That's what really hurts. That hurts. Yeah. Indifference. A booed, you're at least affecting them somehow. Yeah, it feels like art. Yeah. Right? Art elicits a reaction. Yeah.

So if art, if art doesn't, if there's no reaction, it's nothing that the, the landscape painting on the wall and the Marriott. Right. You don't care about. So it's just not art. It's not art. You know, and, but you see a painting and you're like, fuck this guy, Francis Bacon. Yeah. You know.

Yeah. And so I think early on it was like, I will make an impact of one way or a, you know. other. And so, you know, you try to sound different. Yeah. I'm sorry, every comedy club I go to, the owner goes, when do you want me to step in? I know a lot of comics do crowdwork. Some people get heckles. Some people like getting heckled. I said, step in when they're chit-chatting. Yeah. I'll take a heckle. I'll take it you suck or fuck you. Well, if you dare to heckle, you know, I mean. I can use that. But chit-chat, I'm just like, it's like a gnat and it's fucking my rhythm off, you know. So, yeah. What's your take? There's so much crowdwork going on

now, what's your take on, on, I mean, if you have a good sense of humor, crowdwork can just be kind of simple, but also there's something. It's like a sauce. It's not like, it's a sauce. It's fine, but it's like I don't want to do any until like an hour and a might. I want to do an hour of jokes. Yeah. I do a live show on the world, but then I'll do it at the end if they want to like riff and

stuff. Yeah. Because sometimes you find stuff and sometimes there's a moment that makes that show unique. So I think it can be cool. Yeah. But I think if it's like a sauce, if it's all there is. It's not real. It's nothing.

Because there's a lot more of it now or on display. It's a way to get engagement without burning your jokes, which I get that. But to me, it's like, Mark and I got obsessed with this because of jokes. So I get no excitement from it unless, but you know, you can really rip a room open with it because they know it's spontaneous. That's nice. But yeah, it sort of rings like proof that, yeah, I am actually funny, whether it's the bathroom, the kitchen, the crowdwork. But comics should be good. Like, it's so much harder to write a great bit.

So I get excited by a bit. I don't really, it doesn't really excite me. That's an exhibition of word economy and writing and really like working over a thought completely, you know. Exactly. And no one ever quote, no one goes, hey, you see that Chris Rock crowdwork clip. Yeah. No, you know his bits, you know his point of view.

And you know Chris will be funny off the cuff too, obviously. Sure. But like, it's like, yeah, Chris's specials are. But you also get a bump with crowdwork. Like if a crowdwork is a seven out of ten actually funny, it's going to hit a because it's in the moment. Yeah. But I think I'm a joke.

You don't get rattled, but it's also like, it would take so much. Someone's got to, like, shoot themselves in the head in the crowd to rattle us. Like, we're so numb to. Well, I feel the same way because I don't mind dealing with hecklers at all. I enjoy that. And also people hold up signs and things like that that, you know, of songs. So they can dictate what we're doing. You know, if I see a sign and we're playing and it's just like,

All right, well, let's change the set, and we're going to just play this now. Because it's like giving it over to them. It's definitely a different connotation. Sure. But I, you know, I am interested because there's so much more crowdwork that's being put forward. Yeah, yeah. Like, hey, look at what I've done here, you know. It's weird if that's all you got.

Yeah. If you're relying on it to kill, that's a problem. Yeah. If you can use it great. It should be on the tool belt. Yeah, it seems like comics judges. I don't love, like, if I'm following someone and all they do is crowdwork, I'm annoyed. But if they get heckled, of course, they have to deal with it.

Yeah. But if they only, if they're fishing for it, I get a little annoyed. I want to follow. I think, because then you have to kind of get them in your first seven minutes. You have to find a way to get them back into your rhythm. Yeah. If you're doing a short set. I just don't care what you do.

What do you do, sir? Who gives a fuck? He's a dentist. You're not doing it now. Yeah. You're going to do that shit later. Right, right. Well, but I have this charity and we do this event.

And in order, I think, you know, there's this age old adage that music and comedy doesn't work together. I don't believe, I don't agree with that at all. You know, I think that, but my way to get, and when I do this event, it's the hallmark of it is that I'm only asking the musicians, do two songs. That way the investment isn't too much. Right. You know, a lot of these events are five hours long and they want you to do a whole thing and it's a pain in the ass. It's like, no, no, no, no, just do two songs. And the comedians, if you don't want to give bits away or you don't want to do the same old shit, just do crowd work or make fun of me.

That way, it's just a way to everyone's only doing a little. And you really spend most of the night just enjoying each other's work. Right. You know, like for those kind of events. Because I like, I do all kinds of charity stuff, but it's, it can be a pain in the ass. Of course. If someone wants you to put something huge together. Yeah, it's a lot of work.

It's a lot of work. or you're giving bits away. Yeah. I don't hear about giving bits away, you know. Or you're doing something old that you've done, you know, potentially. Totally. You know. That's the worst.

But it's like in that situation, it seems like crowd work is acceptable. Yes. It can bridge that four minute gap really easily. Great point. You know? Yeah. Now, what about these musicians, these lead singer guys who do jokes in between songs? Oh, for fuck sake.

You know, I don't know. I always get jealous because I can't play. you know, stairway to heaven between a bit. But some guys do it well. Like I used to like on the live albums when Leonard Cohn would have like a quick aside. I thought he would do it kind of smoothly, you know. Well, I think he's a special case where you're like, you know, read the ingredients to toothpaste. I think I'm good.

Yeah, right. He would do. Totally. And it just seemed some people have a wisdom. You know, we did the bridge school benefit that, oh my fucking God. We've been drinking. Yeah, but what's, it's, it's, uh, uh, uh, Neil Young. Oh, shit.

He was like, who's that? Yeah. But he had this, this thing you do and you have to play acoustically. You can't play anything electric, right? And we played, um, it's two nights. And, you know, someone played before us. I can't remember. But then the next night, Tom Waits played before us.

Whoa. And it was like, the coolest. Oh, God. What are we going to do? What does he do at a short? He was going to do whatever the fuck. Well, it's like 40 minutes. Oh, 40 minutes.

Which is even worse because he would, he'd play a song that was fucking amazing. Does he do, does he do like the old stuff or does he do newer stuff when he does this? He was doing a little bit of both. That's cool. He'd wander. And plus, he'd wander over the piano and go, wow. And he's chewing gum. Like, I'm only doing this because, you know, I owe Neil money.

but he's doing jokes in between then killing it then getting up and going over the guitar and going nah and then having it all look like he was just improvving the whole thing but there's no fucking way and plus there was jokes yeah he was killing back in the day oh he's hilarious you know and did you get to hang with him at all

I didn't I it's where I met Les Claypool from Primus playing bass with them and David Hildago from Oh my God, brains going, but was playing guitar. Yeah. And I didn't get to talk to him, but that's where I kind of met less and was hanging out with those guys. But he destroyed so hard. Wow.

Yeah, Tom. And to play after Tom wait. To play after Tom Waits. Yeah, tough shoes to follow. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's like flip-flops to follow. It was, we, the first night we did so well. And the second night, it was kind of like you're destined to die.

Right, right. You know, there's no way out. Yeah. I think they have a recording of that. Don't play it. Tom Waits has so many great drinking songs, too. Like, there's such like, you're like hearing when you're drunk and you almost makes you feel cool that your shit face. Like, like when he's going, well, this is every.

The piano has been drinking. I love that song. But you say to yourself, yeah, that seems right. I think the piano mess is. Right, right. I poured a whole fucking quart of booze in it. It only plays drunk songs. I love it.

It's such drinking. I mean, it was kind of, it was probably the most we've ever been destroyed by another artist. Wow. You know, comics will, there's certain comics that are a tough follow, and it can be because they're so good or so bad. It can be either thing. Sure, they can bury it. Oh, well, in what way would it so bad be tough to, because they've just fragged the

room. Yeah, they, they, yeah. You got to dig out of it and then, like, get back to normal ground and then do well. Sure, yeah. The natives arrest. listen up, sad. Yes, yes. You know? Exactly. There are certain people that, yeah, they

can rip the room open and you're just like, what the fuck do I do? Well, I like to, this is why trying to be in a band's band and really working hard so that when you do play, you know, I like to be the band that you don't want to follow because it doesn't

matter if the other band has more fans than you. It's the other band that knows if you've played in a way where they're thinking, oh no, how are we going to follow this? It's not really about the fans. It's about that, you know, it's about being able to sort of mic drop on the other band. Yeah, yeah.

But I got to tell you, there was no way out after this. There's no way out. And we walked out and we go one, two, and there's, you know, one microphone over the drums. We go one, two. And as soon as we start, I see the mic is falling over and it just goes, and makes this super loud noise on the floor. Tom. So it's like, boom,

and it was such a terrible way to begin. Damn. You didn't even get to your four. One, two, boom, bam. Yeah, I've had that where you try to kill it and you grab the mic and the chord comes out. Yeah, yeah. Oh, shit. And I'm just kind of,

and then you spill the thing. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It turns into a Chevy Chase Pratt fall from hell. Completely. An emotional roller coaster. Damn. Is he still with us? Tom?

Yeah. Oh, okay, okay. No, he's just been acting like an old man since he was a little. That's true. Great actors, wow, that's a funny thing. Like shortcuts, fucking old. For sure. Movies he's in.

Is he had coffee and cigarettes? Yeah, he is with Iggy. With Iggy. He's in that Jim Jarmish movie, too, down by law. Yeah, that's it. There's a lot of stuff. Well, and also in the movie, I based my whole fashion life off of, which is Rumblefish. Oh, really?

He basically dressed like Matt Dillon since I was nine years old. Wow. Yeah, Matt Dillon's a hunk. Yeah, he is a hunk. I saw him at a, very time. restaurant in the East Village. Still a hunk. Still a hunk. It looks great. But I saw him at a restaurant. He was alone, and I was

writing or something. How hunky is that? He's by himself. What was he doing? Reading? He was actually. Oh, my God. My ex-girlfriend was at a restaurant with him one night and she goes, come meet me. I'm with Matt Dillon. I was like, no. What? Because he's trying to fuck you. I don't want to cock-block Matt Dillon. Of course. If you want

to get fucked by Matt Dillon, go ahead and get fucked by Matt Dillon. I'm not stepping in. I'm going to cock-block Jeremy Piven, but not good luck. I think her saying no would cop lock Jeremy Piven You've been blocked You've been blocked But yeah I was in a restaurant

And he walks in and he sits down at a table And he rearranges the salt and pepper And he gets up and goes to another table And he left Wait, who is this? Matt Dillon Right He rearranged your salt?

No, not mine. He sat down at a different table It was on Avenue A I remember And he rearranged everything Fallen hard times, he's waiting tables This didn't happen in it This didn't

No No, I swear to God This is like 10, 12 years go. He just went in there alone, rearranged some shit, didn't like it, went to another table. He must be OCD or something. Well, give that a good, but, or he was on something, but he didn't like that sugar

packet. Him and somebody was wearing. That's like peak. He's great in that. So, unreal. He gets his teeth done? Yes, yes. Oh, yeah.

Oh, you know, I love that because I love big teeth. Oh, there you go. So you guys know, I love true. Remember? Yeah, forgot about the teeth. We're learning about each other here. He was not of OCD, apparently. Okay, well, maybe he was high on smack.

Something was going on. Goldie Hawn. Fucking Matt Dillon. What are you doing to us here? What year did he start doing smack? Way to take a grand leap about what he was doing. Call in, Matt, if you don't mind. Not on drugs.

All right. Oh, we got to go. Okay. Oh, I'm having so much fun. Yeah, it's been such a good episode. Thanks for, are there tour dates coming yet? No, don't worry about that. I mean, if you want to see us, Google it, you know.

Okay. I came here for the chat. Well, dude, such a pleasure to me. This was awesome. And the new album is truly awesome. I love it goes low, it goes high. It's so, and the first three songs are all, like, you know, kind of like dark relationship songs.

I love them. Moody shit. Yeah, it's definitely moody. Yeah, no, we'll plug when he leaves. You got to go. But thank you for having me. I appreciate it. You're the band, Josh.

Thank you. Cheers. Sorry about the Scorpion. Change my life. Hey, hey, folks. Come on out. Regina, Casino Regina, two shows. Out of the second. Calgary, baby,

at the laugh shop, or laugh stop? Uh-oh. Shop, I had it right. I shouldn't second guess myself. Club Region at the event center, Acme Comedy Club and Mini App. Love that club. Comedy Works downtown, baby. And then maybe Comedy on State and Wisconsin, Madison, but we'll see about the movie. Pardon.

Portland, probably with the movie, we'll see. Cap City Comedy Club, Tropicana Showroom at Atlantic City, Wind Creek, Vincent and Bethlehem, PA, Palazzo, Theater, Charlotte at the Comedy Zone, and Grand Cedar Showroom at Foxwoods in Connecticut and Comedy Mothership. So, get a bottle of bodega cat.

We've got Athens, Greece, Budapest, Zagreb, Vienna, Warsaw, Helsinki, Stockholm, Copenhagen. Then we got Nashville. We got San Diego. I added a bunch of stuff here. We got Phoenix just added for November.

We got Pittsburgh Improv for November. We got Cleveland, Ohio, in December, Madison, Wisconsin, December. Baltimore area, December 17th through 19th. And I just add some stuff for the New Year. Doral, Florida, Miami Improv, the West Palm Improv, Jacksonville, Florida, never played

the comedy zone there. Calgary, Alberta, Columbus, Ohio, all just on sale now. Did I say Columbus, Hartford, and one other. Addison Improv. There we go. Dallas. So a ton of stuff. Punchup.

Live slash Mark Norman slash tour. Punchup. Live slash Sam Marell. You could get our tour dates there or on our website, whatever's easier. Drink some bodega cat whiskey. DM us for whatever you can do. Did I give you the wrong thing? Uh-oh.

Uh, we're drinking some Bodeca Cat whiskey. Yeah, baby. And, uh, DM Bodeca Cat. Oh, yeah. Oh, by the way, Cobbs Comedy Club selling it? We sold a ton last weekend. I mean, the club's a way to go. I'm in Houston this weekend.

We're going to sell a ton there. We're all sold out. Amazing. So, yeah, DM us if you wanted it at your bar, club, whatever. Bodecaat whiskey on Instagram. Yes. You guys are the best. See you soon.

Comedy. about the fucking pump and her russ. I'm out to lunch here in New Orleans. This woman doesn't look like I remember.